Breaking Through

I drifted to this place When might I drift away? Am lost in time and space Cold feet encased in clay Afraid. I am offbeat Next year I will as well Shamefully repeat Tucked inside my shell Are false masks better than The fear I have no face? Why not be a real man Contempt for this disgrace The others seem together My disappointed self Chafes against the leather Of life upon a shelf The hourglass is filling Sitting here regretting I make no progress chilling My purposeless upsetting False Christian and false doctor Puzzled father, baffled mate Away with all the awkward Before it’s just too late Fastened here so tightly Accurate? Or no? Why not live more rightly? Who has shown me so? And bathroom glass reveals My fortune’s lonesome actor No alibi conceals No outside minds a factor Searing streak of insight It’s I. I see that now Knot inside my windpipe And sweat upon my brow The phantoms hang around For my eyes lone to see Cant seem to shut them down Should I just leave them be? I crave for life to change But what is it I do? Will others find it strange To live with someone new Stinking, stagnate coward! Seek no outside forces! My weaknesses they tower Sturdy as wild horses Perhaps best not to glance Sure not a pretty sight For once my courage stands I will . With all my might I hold fast to my ground What ground is it I seek? Today it shall be found But not amongst the weak To love and feel essential Control , companionship To fill up my potential To bareness shall I strip I steel my face with sternness I will retreat no more And now with manly firmness I free my limited self