Bouis, and Them Mom's Porc Chops

she looked into the cupboard and handed me this " look Bouis, I have sumthang for you, it was your great, great, great, Grand cousins recipe for his magic porkchops."Ya'll be like poo dinna: futcum fair!" she said she was speaking in her native tongue. I took the recipe and looked at it, " Miss Dultrim, where did you get this? She told me I copied it, straight outta, your great, great, great Grand cousins diary, in 1943, he was looking to expand his failing business and a woman down in Wizzy-anna, gave him this drab, and told him to scab his misses, and chop os' pork's and scramble Bouis! he did that and became famous, when he turned it over to chicken. Ya'll gonna need sum Pork chops sum salt, sum flour, cornstarch cayenne pepper paprika sum dried spaggetti sauce sum ilatain seasoning(dry salad dressing) and sum dry onion soup mix, and sum oil for the frying! Bouis gonna get Wanked on tonight!, Bouis gotta sho nuf, winna here!" Moma stop calling me Bouis, and take that silly pirate suit off, they aint have these ingredeints in 1945, hold-up now, ya'll dun forgot to drege the chops in the eggwash, and then redipp them back in the flour, than you fry'em up in the oil! Bouis gon get Wittle coo, paw-paw. The added Value of doo-ditty coo paw, get down ditty ditty dew! Bouis and the le femme' cutie, do dang do! Goldne brown pork and sum French fried potatioes!