Applause Junkies

sullen trappings that silence the most of us making one ever more self-aware as each day passes don’t seem to affect the applause junkie. the quintessential attention whore--- s/he who makes it a point to gain smiles no matter what the cost no matter how little substance exists within them, tightening the cord round the arm tapping the vein they pass these same days by cutting off little pieces of themselves to sell at the market sunup to sundown & without the supposed affection of all those round them the withdrawal sets in & the twitching begins the vomiting & the sleepless nights with endless questions knocking relentlessly at the door inside their minds (“why don’t they like me?” “why am i not loved by all?” “is it that i’m getting older?” “am i not as beautiful as i once was?”)--- then the screaming begins with the showing up on doorsteps of people whom they hardly pretended to associate with only weeks before, now on their knees like profusely sweating end time christians promising sloppy sexual favors promising to remember you went they get to the top when they achieve whatever level of narcissism it is that resides within their most lavish dreams--- perpetually standing on the stage looking down on all of us begging us all to care.