Alone and Depressed

Alone and Depressed The dictionary states that alone is on one’s own; by oneself, or isolated and lonely. Yet even this definition cannot grasp the meaning to one who lives their life in isolation. Isolation not only to the world around you but sometimes to yourself. Depression tears at you when you least expect it for you have no one to comfort you. It’s Never having any one to enjoy the day with or to share your problems with. You get so tired of being alone that you sleep, not because you are tired but because you try to find a way to make this dreadful day end faster. You sleep for the thought that tomorrow will be better. Alone is being in a group and being so scared of what they are thinking that you hide mentally so as not to leave your self open for hurt and despair, closing all doors that may lead out of this eternal darkness. This darkness here that I call life revolves around my darkened strife. It seems as though I may never escape for it seems all my misdeeds are always playing on tape. Round and round that tape does go showing me all the people I once did know. Pushed away by my blackened heart, angry at them for the things I probably did start. Even now as my life and heart did change im still alone because we have become estrange. This darkened heart I once had is back because of the feelings I shoved in this sack. But the darkness I have is not towards them even though it would be easier to just blame all of them. Its towards this life I now must face and pray that I live out my life with the utmost grace and never live those days I had of disgrace.