Alien Invasion

We were invaded peacefully There was no sign of strife Then they went back to their own planet To find intelligent life The Major told the Five Star Yes sir, I did read all the reports And I hurried to the men’s room Because I had to change my shorts Had they caught the alien invaders The world would have been in shock And we would have went to war Because earthlings are too dumb to talk We might have ordered bombings Because we were afraid to take a chance And if the bombs were ineffective We’d have probably peed our pants We use our natural resources But we never use our ears And our leaders manipulate our feelings By playing on our fears If you don’t believe me I hope this will make you smile I like your planet earthling Think I’ll stay here for a while.