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After the Nap

It's a flat summer day the sun pushes down hard so it squeezes the color and the juice out of everything Her body lies between me and the small attic window It's hard to breathe in here between the heat of the roof and the warm dark curve of her side she is turned toward the window "Lie still," she says. "Go to sleep." Tonight it will rain When the window is dark sharp jagged lightning will flash outside the screen where mosquitoes come and go Loud claps of thunder will crack open the sky like an eggshell I might be able to see through into morning! Big fat splats start to pat on the roof gradually increasing comforting in their irregular melody Thunder gone lightning gone the roof is slowly stretching and cooling

Copyright © | Year Posted 2022




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Date: 11/11/2022 7:59:00 PM
Your opening personification of the sun pulls the reader into your poem with further riches like the simile "..thunder will crack open the sky like an eggshell." The cooling evening + rain certainly take centre stage in this fine poem. Be well. Brian
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Date: 10/28/2022 10:52:00 PM
A most vividly painted poem, tactile and the felt sensations of the lines when nature breaks open the heat to release the malaise is most convincing.
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Date: 10/28/2022 12:27:00 PM
Thank goodness for the cooling rains and roofs. Having grown up where the breeze forgot to blow, I can relate. Marvelous imagery and formatting and the beauty of your words fall easy on the ears. :)
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Elizabeth Mccann
Date: 10/28/2022 2:11:00 PM
Just what I was trying to say, Linda; that fir cool breeze is heavenly! And I love those wet sounds. Elizabeth
Date: 10/28/2022 10:01:00 AM
Elizabeth, the imagery you portrayed is amazing, and the rhyme you created is well put together. Your poem is really fantastic. Another layer of stunning beauty has been added to this writing by the way in which your carefully chosen words flow together with the excellent metaphors.
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Elizabeth Mccann
Date: 10/28/2022 2:06:00 PM
Sotto, your comments are so helpful and kind. Our poetic side is so open and vulnerable, it flourishes when fed, soars when befriended. Elizabeth
Date: 10/28/2022 12:59:00 AM
This is a wonderful poem. Loved the imagery you described.
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Elizabeth Mccann
Date: 10/28/2022 2:08:00 PM
I'm so glad you liked it, Victor. Nice to hear from you. Elizabeth

Book: Shattered Sighs