The telephone rings:
Joe: “Yes what’s up”
Judy: “It’s happening”
Joe: “I’m coming… I’m on my way”
Gloomy thoughts invade me as I am driving. My mind is looking at the past trying to revive some happy moments. And there are so many of them in my memory. All these hours we spent together working out the details of ambitious projects. As I picture in my mind both our homes I can see the marks our endeavours have made. All the times we talked our way through differences, I cannot remember us ever arguing. We admired each other because, I suppose, we complemented each other. His cautious approach to life and my careless attitude were at such contrasting poles that one could wonder how we ever achieved what we did together. It was our way of spending time together.
My love for him is nearly obscene. I would have never allowed another woman other than Eliane to get so close to me, but this guy is more than a brother, so much more that it will hurt so much not to have him around. I cry for losing him and he is not gone yet.
……. I’m Knocking at the door
Judy: “He is slipping fast”
Joe: “My god, this is terrifying. I am not ready for this. I cannot start imagining how you must feel”.
Judy: “Nobody is ever ready. I am numb. I am trying to make some sense of all this but I can’t”.
Joe: “I don’t know what to say but I will desperately miss the bugger”.
Adieu my friend, my brother.
I cry for you.
Am I selfish?
Copyright © Joseph Ben Mayor