A Painful Love

I thought you loved me But your fist told me different. I thought you cared for me But apparently I was ignorant. My vision was like the night sky Because all I saw were stars. Your words hurt me deeply Leaving permanent emotional scars. My white shirt sprinkled with crimson, Blood released by the weight of your hand. I cannot move and I cannot breathe While over me you apologetically stand, Wishing you can take back the moment But the damage has been done. Happiness is replaced by hurt And our downward spiral has begun. You ask me to put on “that” lingerie As your way of making it up to me. I’m supposed to be happy and content While you have your way with my body. You refuse to leave unless I give in to you; My mind refuses to clear until you do. I allow you to take advantage of me; An unwanted yet unforceful rape ensues. I look at the clock and the calendar as well Wondering how much time has passed. It seems as if time has stood still Allowing my torture to painfully last. His kisses burned into my skin… His touches corrupted my soul… My value has been diminished, My worth he apathetically stole. Who was I before that first hit? Where is that missing person? I don’t know who I am anymore… My memory continues to worsen. The love you say you have for me? You can keep that to yourself. I need to start taking care of myself Because you are bad for my health.