23rd Time

Seems like the 23rd time I've done this. Seems like the 23rd time to me. That I have broken everything I hold dear in my life. Killing all my dreams. Seems like I was once a good father. Two daughters came my way. Seems like I've had two wives. Neither that will speak to me today. Seems like God was against me. Probably from the start. Seems like my God is heartless. Letting my world fall apart. All that I've held and all that i will. All that I've bought and all that I sell. Seems like peices of my heart and parts of my soul. That have fallen from grace and now must go. Seems like the 23rd time I've become sober. And realized the pain that I've caused. Seems like I've hurt so many. Must be my 23rd flaw. 23 bottles and 23 drugs. 23 relationships swept under the rug. Distance memories of loves that I've lost. But nothing came at a higher cost. Than the 23 times I missed Daddy I love you, please come play with me. For that is the true punishment for the error of my ways. No invites to celebrate their 23rd year. Just this empty life I've lead full of empty tears.