Get Your Premium Membership

When Poetry Eludes My Soul

Poet's Notes
(Show)

Become a Premium Member and post notes and photos about your poem like Malabika Ray Choudhury.


June 8, 2024

Inspired By: Poetry Shoud Be Felt Premiere Contest

Sponsor: Suzette Richards

Third Place 

poetry eludes my soul when I desperately want to embrace it when I watch dahlias blossom and dance in the wind poetry glowing in my mind dances too when at tranquil dawn idly lying in bed I listen to pitter-patter of falling raindrops when sun-god appears on his chariot driven by seven horses illuminate horizon turning sky into flaming vermillion crimson with my elated heart I dream poetry poetry abandons me when at darkest of nights I stay awake looking at the bare ceiling wonder why unfair and cruel words still cut me mercilessly like a knife why do I feel like a candle inside me melting till there is nothing left fragile petals of a wilting rose ruthlessly sprawled on the hard ground why do teardrops fall like tiniest pearls created by hurt and suffering in a poverty-stricken country early quiet morning crows caw harshly the young boy I see on the streets painting the exterior of a building a torn shirt on a skeleton body shivering from biting cold beyond my comprehension how he survives poetry leaves me

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Date: 3/27/2025 2:48:00 PM
Congratulations on your winning work in Brian's contest. Very creative. Way to go. Sara K
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 3/27/2025 2:58:00 PM
Thank you, Sara. I am glad you liked the poem - it was written in a very unique format created by Suzette. Take care, enjoy Spring.
Date: 7/6/2024 5:31:00 PM
Wow. So poignant and profound, Mala. Congrats to you
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 7/7/2024 10:31:00 AM
Thank you, Andrea. So glad to find your loveliest comment. Not writing many poems recently, too busy with memoir project. Love and hugs ~ Mala
Date: 7/5/2024 1:56:00 AM
So clear, the poem flows effortlessly. Congratulations on your win dear poet. Happy writing.
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 7/6/2024 4:33:00 PM
Dear Thriveni, Thank you for reading and commenting on my poem. Your inspiring and thoughtful words are truly appreciated.
Date: 7/5/2024 12:26:00 AM
Congratulations on your 3rd place win, Mala, with this metapoetry. Opening the poem with the desire to capture the magic moments in poetry; relying (intentionally?) on clichés to express those moments. The fifth stanza heralds a turn in the mood and assumes a darker aspect, bringing to the reader the unvarnished personal aspect. In the final stanza, the focus is outward, but still subjective. The simplicity of the final line, ‘poetry leaves me’, punctuate your (and perhaps even those of the readers) feelings of hopelessness in the face of the inevitable situation.
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 7/5/2024 2:34:00 PM
Dear Suzette, Thank you so much for the placement. I feel truly honoured to be with such talented poets. Your comment and analysis are wonderfully detailed and profound! Best wishes to you ~
Date: 7/5/2024 12:18:00 AM
Congrats Mala on your contest win! Lovely write! a different take! I like the Sun God on his chariot driven by 7 horses! I often think of them as the seven colours of light VIBGYOR!
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 7/5/2024 2:35:00 PM
Thank you, Krish. Looking forward to read yours...must be unique!
Date: 6/20/2024 3:26:00 AM
Poetry hasn't eluded you dear Mala though you lament the loss of poetic illumination. Your mind is just distracted by the sight of the poor boy shivering in cold and painting the interiors . Turn your mind to watch dahlias blossoming and waving in the wind and your mind will flood with emotions and words will effortlessly flow.
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 6/21/2024 1:59:00 PM
Dear Valsa, feeling so good to hear from you. Recently I got busy with a memoir-project, and not being able to participate at this site as much as I used to. The poor boy shivering in cold - is a true story, but think about it - how many children are shivering in cold around us, and we are helpless! I feel relieved and reenergized with your words - probably I will start writing poems again every day like I did for last four years! It has given me peace and a feeling of reward! You are such a great person, Dear Valsa, and a great friend! Thank you for being my friend! Love and blessings
Date: 6/9/2024 12:34:00 PM
I agree with Sara, you have the emotions needed to please Suzette. Your philosophical statement is heartbreaking. b0l Mala!
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 6/21/2024 1:53:00 PM
Dear Anaya, Thank you so much. I am glad you found my philosophical statement meaningful. You are a great poet - I really enjoy reading your poems which always convey a deep message! Love and blessings ~ Mala
Date: 6/9/2024 9:09:00 AM
Great use of form and you have written with a lot o emotions here..
Login to Reply
Ray Choudhury Avatar
Malabika Ray Choudhury
Date: 6/9/2024 9:52:00 AM
I haven’t submitted it yet…still checking syllables and working on it, Dear Poet. This is the first time I am using this unique form. Thank you for dropping in. Best wishes~

Book: Reflection on the Important Things