Intrusive Thoughts

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Written, June 10, 2025

Entered contest, July 31, 2025
Submitted to the International Contest, 2025 Poetry Marathon, Mile 1
Sponsor, Mark Toney

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I have a voice within my mind that never stops talking, it is rattling and annoying and intrusive most of the time: though, at times it speaks to me of random memories, like the smell of grandma's cookies with hints of chocolate; or the feel of my baby's soft downy hair. But, there are moments when my voice is hateful to me, telling me that I should do this or that now: its voice rough, unfriendly, cold, yelling, and full of hate, and I just wish it to stay quiet, depart, leave me alone; then, it can be smooth and soothing. At times, the voice is a whisper or a murmur drifting, like the sound of music enthralling me to listen: the air around me seems to smell like lavender scents, and I hear the laughter of a little girl, me, as I run; down a street of my past memories. The voice invades my dreams at night disturbing me, it says remove your fuzzy blanket and venture outside; why, I ask, JUST DO IT, the voice yells loudly insisting, outside in my dream, and put my hands in the snow, cold, like stabbing me with a thousand needles. The voice has no face, I have no concept if female or male, is it a friend or foe, although, it can help me write: most of the time it makes me feel sad, it is seldom positive, I have tried methods to push it away, but it creeps back; guess, it is justa piece of me. When it is just chattering away with negativity, I shout at it (was that a real yell) to go away please: and I imagine it whimpers and crawls away for a time, only to return with its intrusive low voice in my mind; on and on, but, I am not listening today.

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Valsa George

Date: 8/2/2025 2:47:00 AM

Such intrusive thoughts are within all of us. Many a time, they take sway over, leaving us in confusion. Even at night, when we should be sleeping, they invade us. Sometimes they are helpful directing us. Great entry, dear Constance. All the Best in the race!

Daniel Henry Rodgers

Date: 8/1/2025 1:05:00 PM

Dear Constance yes, that chattering, relentless voice? You captured exactly how strange it is and the ways it can bully, reminisce, comfort, and toss up memories like sunlight and storms back-to-back. There’s so much honesty in how you describe its shapeshifting nature from soothing to sharp, from a gentle memory to a cold, needling command. Loved it. Blessings, Dear Constance, Daniel