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Nette Onclaud | + Follow Poet |

I Couldn't Talk About It, So I Wrote a Poem

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Based on my interview with a male relative about the sensitive topic: compulsive, dangerous habits that can ruin self- esteem

------------------- Raging murmurs of night's incensed flame Release my soul from time's lonely contempt; I pour groans, greased bills for this secret craving That my mouth, in disguise, words play About sweet babbles, once again To incite passion quite crude of fleeting trysts. Pump upon pump of sighs quench the emptiness Just for now...my hunt for company Loitering on a district 's sleazy street; Untamed as the red of moon That my thirst to relieve another gulp of angst Unleashes what is cold and burnt within... Until curving feline gaits slither along Waiting for a prey; a gratifying reward From a stained drained love dejected, Not by grace's command this heart endures, But through a lusty thought: life is simply a game.

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Crystol Woods

Date: 7/23/2024 10:30:00 AM

So well written as usual! Xoxo

Silent One

Date: 7/22/2024 11:41:00 AM

Life can be seen as a game... but it is so much more.. Congratulations on your placement in the contest..

Krish Radhakrishna

Date: 7/9/2024 2:10:00 AM

Just Brilliant! Marvellous in every way!! Love it!

Duke Beaufort

Date: 7/8/2024 7:40:00 AM

Nette, your poem makes me think about succumbing to addiction and short-term gain when we do not have tools to deal with our own issues in a constructive way. These things usually do not end well unless getting help of some kind. You were very kind to listen and hopefully that could start the man in question to seek some assistance with this kind of behavior. The road to enhanced self-esteem is quite difficult, but the best path for the long term. It requires a willingness. TY for sharing!

Sotto Poet

Date: 7/5/2024 3:45:00 PM

Dear Nette, Excellently composed and presented. Your style is elegant and characterized by systematic succinctness. The poem is quite evocative. Life often presents itself as a game, an endeavor that involves uncertainty and random outcomes. A love that has lost its vitality may cause feelings of sadness and disappointment in the hearts of those involved. An exceptional submission for the competition. Wishing you the utmost success.

Kim Rodrigues

Date: 7/5/2024 7:53:00 AM

That my thirst to relieve another gulp of angst Unleashes what is cold and burnt within… But through a lusty thought: life is simply a game...hugs, my friend!

Valsa George

Date: 7/4/2024 8:49:00 PM

Your style is classy and marked by a kind of disciplined brevity. The poem is so poignant. Life often appears a game.... a game of chance. A stained drained love can leave hearts dejected. A great entry for the contest. All the Best dear Nette.

Gershon Wolf

Date: 7/4/2024 7:56:00 PM

Wow! The arresting way you've described this 'game' makes me wonder how awesome 'reality' must be. ~ Staying in the game, for now. Cheers, Gershon

Ink Empress

Date: 7/4/2024 1:03:00 PM

Dear nette, very well written and delivered. And the last line, hits so strong “ But through a lusty thought: life is simply a game.” It surely does feel this way sometimes… everything seems like a game. Sometimes. I love the internal rhymes and use of poetic techniques here! Profound! Best wishes

Karen Croft

Date: 7/4/2024 6:06:00 AM

I think you captured your topic very well in your poem!

Crystol Woods

Date: 7/4/2024 2:17:00 AM

Captivating poem Nette! I see the images, blurry and fast paced, then still for but a moment only to hurry on. It hit me as a bit sordid? You are a magician with words! I also read your bio sketches... very unique! You sound fun, classy, and brilliant. Xo