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Comfort and Comforter;Sibling vs. Sibling


Almost twenty-nine years ago, while sitting on the sofa in his living room when I arrived at my dad's home to attend to his ailing body, his final coherent words, still resonate in my mind, "Lil mama, man will always disappoint, God, will appoint and anoint." Not really knowing what he meant until after his time on earth had passed; I now live by my dad's everlasting words daily. I never really knew how much my dad loved God until his health started to decline and decline rapidly, after the death of my mother. When my dad was healthy, my dad rarely attended church or ever spoke about God. Very seldom did I see my dad reading the bible, nor did I recall a time I saw my dad pray; I knew he had to love God by the words he spoke to me in his final days of living.
My dad's health started to decline after the death of my mom. He was so disappointed (heartbroken) until he did not want to continue to live. Yes, he was sad because my mom died; his most painful hurt was because my siblings omitted his name from mom's obituary. I explained to dad that I did my best to get them to change mom's obituary to add his name. He understood and did not hold me accountable. He said they would not listen to me because I am the youngest of all the daughters. After he stopped crying, he wiped his eyes, and repeated his words to me, this time he said: "Lil mama, don't worry, man will always disappoint, God, will appoint and anoint." After repeating those words to me, he had a stroke. My dad was diagnosed with brain cancer at the local hospital by the attending physician in the emergency room. When the doctor told me the severity of my dad's illness, I made plans to transfer my dad to a VA hospital for him to receive proper care, knowing his remaining time on earth would be short-lived.
After two weeks of being treated at the VA hospital, my dad's health was on a rapid downward spiral. When I reported dad's health status to my siblings, they were more interested in what they would inherit as opposed to helping me deal with dad's medical condition and assisting me with the preparation of his funeral. By the time my dad took his last breath, everything he had needed me to do I did it. I did what was necessary so his soul would rest well in the afterlife. The love my dad showed towards and gave to others fell upon my shoulders when he became ill. By taking care of my dad, I knew what his final words meant.
My dad was telling me to try my best not to be disappointed when I find out the person(s) I thought would be there in my time of need is not the person(s) I had in mind; but, I can rest assured God will send the person(s) I need to take care of me if, and/or when, I can no longer care for myself. God, without any doubt, knows the heart and soul of those who will provide comfort and be an everlasting Comforter.


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Book: Shattered Sighs