Poetry Forum

Forum Home » High Critique » Please Critique Mine - Id really appreciate it

For poets who want unrestricted constructive criticism. This is NOT a vanity workshop. If you do not want your poem seriously critiqued, do not post here. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!

9/19/2017 7:42:35 PM Lawrence Yurick Posts: 1	Eyes irrigated face flush, heart hurting, throat throbbing Throat throbbing… My throat ached as if it had been crushed by the suffocating grip of regret as it tried to choke back the words I wanted to say Face flush… My face grew hot as it was faced with the arduous tax of hiding all vehemence Heart hurting… My heart ached with he agony of a thousand lost loved ones as it worked to suppress the anguish trapped within Eyes irrigated.. My eyes not as strong as the others, could not hold back all of the sorrow that tormented my soul and eventually let one solitary tear escape carrying with it the agony trapped inside As it caressed the crease where my nose met my cheek it told the story that I could not I miss you I love you I need you I don’t want to leave you! But the only words to escape my lips somehow happened to be: Goodbye
	• permalink • reply with quote
9/19/2017 9:56:56 PM Jessica Jones Posts: 5	Love the wordplay and the adjectives you used! This is really wonderful! I do hope you continue writing amazing pieces like this one! Also if you'd like to give feedback or critique on mine that would help me out a bunch!!
	• permalink • reply with quote