Don't Post Poetry Here!!! Talk about anything or need a shoulder to cry on? Share your thoughts and emotions here:
5/9/2017 10:23:01 AM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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Hello, I am new to this site and you guessed it...I just need to talk. I have recently become detached from everyone and everything. I do not do this by choice mind you. I have had really bad things happen in my life ( who hasn't? ) and my biggest problem is talking about them. They are very touchy subjects. I normally write poems about my feelings because it is my therapy if I am being honest. It's really hard to talk to people face to face about the things tormenting my soul. I was inappropriately abused as a young child by a family member. I think a whole 2 people know about it ( now whomever takes the time to read ) but like I said..baby steps. I am tired of keeping everything inside and feeling afraid. I am afraid of what others will think or say if I tell them. I have kept it to myself for 20 years and I am finally ready to take it slowly at actually dealing with what happened. I was 22 before even telling my mother. You worry..you worry what people will think of you. My biggest fear if I tell someone? They will only have sympathy. I am not looking for sympathy. I am looking for room to breathe. Thanks for listening, maybe I can work up the courage to talk to fill anyone if they want to know, in on the other traumatic things that have happened to me but it does feel better to at least type it where there are only strangers. It's progress. Instead of rambling on and on, I guess I am just trying to find people who I can talk to that will understand. I have searched for numerous support groups in my area and I have found nothing close. If you do not wish to reach out or share, I politely ask that you move along to the next post because hurtful criticism doesn't help either one of us.
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5/9/2017 10:30:41 AM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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Hi Laken! Life can be extremely tough sometimes and I've learned that (for me, at least) it can be easier to throw ourselves into an anonymous online hug rather than seeking out help or affection from people we know in real life. I do it all the time, so I know a bit of where you're coming from.
I wouldn't say that it's necessarily the BEST or HEALTHIEST way to deal with isolation/depression/other not-good things, but it is occasionally effective.
I was never abused, but I've struggled a lot with depression, anxiety, bullying, and self-loathing. I'm in a poisonous home environment- only a year and a half left!- and I've only just begun repairing relationships that I tore down years ago. So even if I've never been in your exact situation, I can empathize. I understand how frustrating pity is, and how annoying it is to reach out into the ether and get... nothing.
I too use poetry to express my emotions, particularly the negative ones. If you ever want to share a poem specifically with someone who reads for the underlying sadness, I'm your girl.
Anyway, I'm rambling (as per usual), but I wanted to tell you, hey, I'm here, and I'm up to listening. Talking. Discussing.
Stay strong and learn happiness! <3
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5/9/2017 10:41:02 AM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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Thank you so much. I appreciate you reaching out and I agree it is not healthy at all. It may not be the same situation but I too came from a bad home environment. I am always up for talking and listening also. I look forward to reading your poems. ( still maneuvering the site ) again, thank you so much for extending a hand when I was reaching out. You have made my day. I will keep you in my thoughts in prayers and send as many good vibes as I can. You seem an amazing person and I apologize that you are not appreciated more.
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5/9/2017 12:44:01 PM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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I appreciate it.  Poets are very emotional creatures and I've come to understand that the majority of us desire more affection and recognition than we get; I would like to be the person to positively influence a poet's day, even if only for a moment. I hope that by being there for you, or for any other artist for that matter, I can help them feel just a bit more appreciated.
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5/9/2017 3:32:56 PM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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You are so right! you did make a difference and it feels nice to have people like you in the world
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5/9/2017 3:55:34 PM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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I just learned how to read the comments and I wanted to thank you for such kind input. All of my work comes from something personal that has made an impact on my life. I am not good with describing verbally what I feel but poetry has always been a way for me to pour my soul out. I like to think someone, somewhere will also feel like they are not alone in whatever battle they are facing.
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5/9/2017 4:05:44 PM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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Your poetry is beautiful. There's still room for you to grow, but your flow, word choice, and imagery is wonderful. I devoured your poems very quickly and longed for more. I'm glad you chose to share; the site benefited greatly from your courage. As I said in a comment, I hate that sorrow leads to such moving poetry, but I feel fortunate to exist in a world with such easy access to the fruit of such pain. Poetry is magical; I used to hate reading it, still struggle to stay focused on particularly long pieces (like mine, oops!), but spoken word has always had a special place in my heart and recently I've delved into written poetry as well. I've found that a lot of online works, by amateurs of any age, are often better and more beautiful than the published poems of masters. In my personal opinion, anyway. I'd rather read a rough, thrown-together, heat-felt piece by a young poet than Wordsworth, any day.
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5/9/2017 4:06:42 PM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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Let me clarify: I enjoyed listening to poetry such as spoken word and slam, but I've only recently been able to appreciate poems that I must read myself.
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5/9/2017 10:26:20 PM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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Thanks this site has actually given me courage. I have been lost here lately and have been searching for people that I can share with as well as them share with me. To read such emotion and know that you have others who also suffer and can relate..it's a beautiful thing..unfortunate in a way but it makes such a difference to hear and be heard. I have been doing some research on how to better form poetry. I have never really written any type of form per say, I get wordy because everything inside comes flooding out from being kept hidden for so long. I have enjoyed everyone's poems and kindness oh so much. It is a free feeling.
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5/10/2017 9:05:35 AM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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Oh, I understand completely what you mean. I have to constantly edit my poems because they get insanely long and wordy; I have poems that take up about five or six pages long-hand. It's actually helpful that the site limits word count, because otherwise I'd ramble on for AGES.
And I feel the same about courage and searching for people to relate to. I live in a very small town and it feels like a breath of fresh air to interact with such a wide variety of people, from different demographics and backgrounds. I'm extremely thankful for sites like this which connect me to like-minded individuals.
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5/10/2017 10:33:46 AM
laken smith
Posts: 14
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I also reign from a small town. I have extreme social anxiety so I don't communicate that much with the outside world. Online helps me to be more social because I do not panic lol. There are mostly rude people where I live so I love how polite everyone is here. Kindness will take everyone a long way and I really wish the world would see that. I have enjoyed our new found friendship more than you know. I have talked to some really cool people on here. I have found my tribe lol
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5/11/2017 9:38:00 AM
Carissa Marie
Posts: 24
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That's exactly how I think of it! I constantly say "my people are online" and similar little jokes- that aren't quite jokes, you know? I've met more incredible, talented people online than my "stranger-danger-OMG!" parents have in their entire lives. I feel completely blessed to have come into contact with so many different humans that I never would have known otherwise.
Small towns upset me. A lot. Before I moved where I am now, I lived in on of the larger counties in my state and I was surrounded by a plethora of people of every demographic- and then I moved into a 98% white, cis, conservative, uber-religious town that regularly makes me want to cry. The internet is my replacement home of diversity, and I adore it.
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9/20/2017 5:33:00 AM
Don Mitchell
Posts: 2
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(d/fl)yingsquirrel wrote:
That's exactly how I think of it! I constantly say "my people are online" and similar little jokes- that aren't quite jokes, you know? I've met more incredible, talented people online than my "stranger-danger-OMG!" parents have in their entire lives. I feel completely blessed to have come into contact with so many different humans that I never would have known otherwise.
Small towns upset me. A lot. Before I moved where I am now, I lived in on of the larger counties in my state and I was surrounded by a plethora of people of every demographic- and then I moved into a 98% white, cis, conservative, uber-religious town that regularly makes me want to cry. The internet is my replacement home of diversity, and I adore it.
I agree with you and for me the Internet is a home....
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