Book: Shattered Sighs

Get Your Premium Membership

Poetry Forum

home recent topics recent posts search faq

Forum Home » Be Gentle » CREANIMATION

Post here if you're new to receiving a critique and you want "gentle" feedback on your poem. Constructive criticism only. PLEASE Only Post One Poem a Day!!!
1/5/2015 7:08:06 AM

Kristin Edwards
Posts: 3
I waited until the water cleared as it rose above greatheights
Swimming was not an option for the current was too heavy
I did test my faith and I tried to walk on water, however thedarkness
Closed in on me and took me to depths I cannot speak of
I awoke in gentle arms carrying me softly to my destination
For the struggles of my sustenance where to no avail
The symphony played in dedication to my oblivion
With each note I descended further into construction
Eternity for my soul had been spoken for centuries ago
The trees swept like mad house wives in fury
All along I sought out peaceful pleasantries with hearts likemine
It took a lifetime it seemed to prepare myself for thisoccasion
Then in a moment time managed to confront all of my senses
My lips tasted like saltwater singed cement heat rocks
Dry, cracked and corroded with outrageous stench
Portraying a bit of sarcasm, I acted as if I wanted to smile
Longing for a shoulder to cry on in my form of decay
Sifting through the self-loathing storms of impurities
My soul begins to seek torment within the grounds eruption
Darkness rains heavily upon my plot against destiny
Leaving my existing operation at a formal stand
I entertain the notion that I can now swim the rough waters
If indeed I should ever get out of the sand.
01-04-15

--
http://wisconsinangel.blogspot.com/
permalink • reply with quote
1/5/2015 7:17:13 AM

Kristin Edwards
Posts: 3
I was trying to be different and this came out. I don't even know what to call it definition wise? I was studying a bit on this wonderful site and I ran across a few things and here is what I made of it. please tell me if there is anything here other than babble.. Thank you. I'm still learning how to get around as well. I noticed that my /me/EdwmommaK71 was not listed above with the other. Do I need to fix that? Thanks again

--
http://wisconsinangel.blogspot.com/
permalink • reply with quote

Forum Home » Be Gentle » CREANIMATION




Powered by AspNetForum 6.6.0.0 © 2006-2010 Jitbit Software