Sometimes I Wonder
Sometimes I wonder exactly how it is that you did it. To walk away and just let go u know I'll never forget it. The way I felt when I realized that u were gone. Because it was u not me this time who was in the wrong. It was u not me this time who broke a heart. It was u who walked away and left me to call apart. U turned ur back without a word and u wouldn't reply. Without a whisper there were no farewells and there were no goodbyes. So locked away and made to wait all I had was to e. Time to wait, time to hate and time to change my mind. So I thought about u and all the good times we shared. Not knowing that when u left I'd be unprepared. Unprepared and unaware but that's how it goes but when u left u left a scar and believe it shows. So I guess as selfish as I am I always thought that you'd stay. I thought for one second that u would walk away. I never thought for one minute that u would leave but leave me is what u did it's just hard to believe. So I'd rather stay numb and I'd rather not feel. I mean I guess I'm just dumb still thinking loves real. Still believing the idea that her one and only. But if that were the truth I wouldn't feel so lonely. I wouldn't write this today with a heart so heavy and I'd still love her in every way if only she'd let me. But she won't, she just quit, she showed me what love meant. So it's obvious and it's clear that my love meant spit . Nothing to her and so she's nothing to me but as close as we were why couldn't I see the distance between us and how fast it was growing and it's true what they say, it's better not knowing. Because now that I know I wish that I didnt. But not one day goes by, not one second or minute. Not one hour can pass to where I don't see her face. Now how long will this last when can I erase what I see when I close my eyes? Because it hurts when I blink and I just realized that the worsed came to be when she left my side and it hurts somewhere deep, deep down inside. It's just hard to believe that what we had died. There's no air left to breathe, there's no tears to be cried. There's no reason that I can see to do it again. Everything that came to be finally came to an end. So as thoughtless as I am I never thought mess of u because u made me who I am when u have me the best of u. And I'll always owe that plus I'll never forget it. But sometimes I still wonder how it is that u did it.
Copyright © Anthony Clifford | Year Posted 2020
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