Older
My body lies
Under an inch of snow
Frozen, broken,
Half-dead in the cold
My spirit is gone,
My eyes fixed, unmoving
My mind is blank
And my self is losing
My veins are frozen with your passing
Now winter has come and it been years since I've last seen
The sun or anything resembling normality
Reality seems like one big illusion
All the people, coming and going
Blur in an endless confusion
In a fashion in which the passion is drained from me
And I'll never believe that anything good will set me free
How much longer until my branches break from underneath me and re-open old woulds,
Open my make-shift sutures
And rewrite my entire future
How much longer do I have to lay here out in the cold,
Freezing, pleading, being
All that this body hasn't sold
I'm crumbling and mumbling apart,
Drifting and sinking into the dark where all my friends now live
And where I've kept it here, on top
Of this ice-covered abyss, my steps steady, but not enough for two
Okay on the surface but not all the way through
And I'm shaking and no one can hold my body and protect it from the quakes
That echo from my heart
Echoing the pain
And echoing the stark
Blackness filling in me
And forever stalling the
Changing seasons
For reasons which I cannot find
And cannot mend
And I grieve for all I've lost and all I've hurt
So for now I'll lie here trapped in ice and feeling the weights slowly breaking my shoulders
Burning me to a smolder
And you'll find that it never gets
easier, you just
Bend and break, adjust yourself to the weather,
Back facing the sun and you feel colder and colder
Because you don't gain anything, feel anything,
You just get
older
Copyright © Alessandra Lovell | Year Posted 2015
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