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If I Said

If I said I was lonely, suicidal, depressed,
Would you come to visit me
Would you sit with me while I cry
Or would you just ignore me
Then stand by my graveside asking why?

If I called out for help in the middle of the night
Would you answer my call
Would you persuade me not to give up the fight
Or would you put your phone on silent
And cry when it's just too late?

I've battled my mind all my life,
Behind the fake smile, the hilarious laugh.
I've been the life and soul of the party
While battling thoughts that I want to die.
Wondering if it's really worth another try.

Yet try is what I shall continue to do,
I must continue to battle through every day
Because I never want those I love 
To be standing by my graveside 
Wondering why?
2019 Susan Logan

Copyright © Susie Logan | Year Posted 2019

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Book: Reflection on the Important Things