When You Told Me
When you told me..,,
When you told me you had cancer,
i could not believe it.
My little sister is poorly and I wish it was me.
You told me not to worry then you said.
“ I’ve got it covered and it’s not going to beat me. “
So you named your cancer Brian and you said.
“he’s not going to kill me, I’m going to beat this”.
Our family was devastated and said why You?
You was such a kind and a caring person who would do
anything for anyone, unlike me who was a ..
but we are a strong family and will do what ever it takes
to help my little sister beat this deadly disease.
Test after test you had, And you always kept on saying
‘Brian’ is not going to get me’. ‘
As I am brave and strong.’
Just before the chemo started you shaved your hair off
and what was left was so soft and fluffy.
When the chemo started, I thought how brave you are.
Then once again you said,
” I’m going to beat this and I will be a survivor”.
“I want to ring that bell and I want my life back”.
The first few chemo sessions were going so well,
you wasn’t sick or poorly,
You was just your normal happy self.
We were going out each day
laughing and giggling along the way,
Making memories in those happy days.
Then covid19 came along it changed everything
and we all had to stay in.
We would speak to each other everyday
but that just wasn’t the same.
Boris made some rules for the country to obey,
but rules are made to be broken,
As a family we broke the rules,
sod you Boris and your rules..
Finally when I got to see you, I couldn’t
Believe my eyes, how much you had changed,
My poor little sister is just wasting away.
You wasn’t really eating because you
always felt so sick.
You were always sleepy and
had no energy.
When it was your birthday we all made a fuss.
You got lots of presents so it shows that you was truly loved.
But when your birthday cake came out with candles all a light
you looked so sad.
I knew what you was thinking,
This is my final birthday.
my last one.
You were dying and fighting a losing battle.
Brian was about to win,
you was frail and tired and so weak.,
I know you just wanted to give up.
Then you started to get really poorly and it was sad to see,
My little sister is dying right in front of me.
Your last chemo had Changed you and
you became really funny.
Your arms were covered in bruises
and they were black and blue.
You looked so little and small compared to me.
Then we were told unfortunately there’s no more we can do,
So we sat and prayed and watched that’s all we could do.
On the Thursday night,
me, mum and Mick we sat round your bed,
Just crying and watching you..
We played songs to you and sang.
As I was holding your hand I was breaking my heart.
How could you god take her away from us, and why?
The night went so quickly and then the sun came up,
you were staying here with us for another day.
The Friday night came but I didn’t stay .
I couldn’t handle seeing you suffering in this way.
Mum and Mick watched over you and prayed .
Asking god to come and take you home
as they didn’t like to see you suffering.
You made it through the night
and was still here.
But when the sun came up
and the morning was to begin .
Mum and Mick were watching you,
The sunlight coming through the window
you took your last breath and sadly died.
You had ended your life’s journey
God has asked you to come home
as your work on earth is now complete .
We will never understand why you ….
They say everything happens for a reason….
When or if will find the answer to this reason…
The hole you have left in my life and
heart will never be replaced,
But I know you are in no more pain
and have gone to a better place.
I love you and miss you.
By Tina Mitchell
Copyright © Tina Mitchell | Year Posted 2020
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