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Best Randy Johnson Poems

Below are the all-time best Randy Johnson poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

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Details | Randy Johnson Poem

I kissed another girl

(This is a fictional poem)

When I kissed another girl, word got back to you.
You slapped my face and told me that we're through.
Most kisses taste pretty sweet but that kiss was tart.
Now I'm all alone nursing a broken heart.
Kissing that girl was foolish and it was a mistake.
But I'll make it up to you no matter how long it takes.
I can't go on if our love is at an end.
If you'll take me back, I'll never look at another woman again.
You're the only woman who I want to be with.
So I'm on my knees begging you to forgive.


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

Chihuahua - Part IV

I've loved Agnes ever since the day that I got her.
She's the closest thing that I have to a daughter.
Since 1990, she's the only female dog that I've had.
When my former female dog died, it was very sad.

I named her after Mom and that makes her special indeed.
Agnes is a full stock Chihuahua dog, that is her breed.
She's special and unique, there can never be another.
Because she's named Agnes, it's like having a small part of my mother.

(Dedicated to Agnes, my Chihuahua dog.)


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

I'm Superman

I'm an alien from Krypton and I'm able to fly.
I'm Superman and bullets don't make me die.
Bombs, tanks and nuclear weapons can't kill me either, I'm invulnerable.
I save at least fifty people every day, that's amazing and it's pretty cool.
Usually, the only thing that can kill me is Kryptonite.
But I did die when Doomsday and I had a massive fight.
We beat each other to death but I was able to return.
My death made many cry, I was touched by their concern.
I have X-ray vision and I can see through everything except lead.
Lex Luthor hates my guts and he says he won't rest until I'm dead.
Last week there was a forest fire and I put it out with my ice breath.
When I got through blowing on that fire, there was none of it left.
I can also make laser beams come out of my eyes.
When people see me, they say "There's the man who flies."
I have a girl who I love more than life itself, her name is Lois Lane.
When I'm Superman, she's nice but when I'm Clark Kent, she's a pain.
Some people call me a miracle but I don't think that's true.
If you're ever in danger, just call my name and I'll save you.

(This poem is based on the DC Comic Book that was created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster.)


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

Cousins in love

(This poem is based on a movie I saw.)

It was tragic when two teenagers died.
They couldn't be together so they committed suicide.
They were cousins and that's why their parents kept them apart.
They decided to end it all because of their broken hearts.

The parents forbade their relationship because they were in love with each other.
They decided that they wanted to die because they couldn't be with one another.
Now their parents are all tore up inside.
They'll be in misery for the rest of their lives because of their kids suicides.


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

Foul Mouth Parrot

I bought a parrot but he has a foul mouth.
I let him loose so that he could fly South.
But he came home again.
This proves that I can't win.
He says the F word two hundred times a day.
He offends everybody and drives them away.
Nobody will take this bird even though I offer to pay them.
I'm going out of my mind, it looks like I'm stuck with him.
I have the only parrot on Earth that's a sinner.
If he doesn't shut up, he's going to be my dinner.

(This is a fictional poem)


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

If Jesus was here

If Jesus was here, I'd hug him and I'd hug his father too.
When a man has them on his side, there's nothing he can't do.
Praying and having faith is all that it takes.
Worship the Lord and he will not forsake.


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

I wish your death was just a dream

I wish that your death turned out to only be a bad dream.
Your demise makes me feel like I'm coming apart at the seams.
I wish that I would wake up and realize that it was only a nightmare.
But you really are gone forever and it proves that my life is unfair.
If I could wake up, I would be so pleased and it would be great.
Your death hurts so bad that at times I can't even think straight.
I've heard other people say how bad their loved ones deaths hurt them.
But a man doesn't know how bad it really is until it happens to him.
The Lord decided to call you home even though I asked him not to.
I wish your death was just a dream because I would still have you.

[Dedicated to Agnes Johnson (1948-2013) who passed away on March 6, 2013.]


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

I wish I could call God

I wish I could call God on the telephone.
I'd like to talk to our maker who's sitting on his throne.
I'd like to thank him for all that he's done for me.
I'd like to thank him for letting me live in a land that's free.
I'm a man who God has blessed indeed.
God has given me everything that I need.
I'm not rich but there are other ways to be wealthy.
I have my cats, my talents and I'm healthy.
When a man has God in his life, he's ten feet tall.
I wish I could thank God personally with a phone call.


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

I believe in love a little less each day

Life can get pretty hard when relationships go astray.
I believe in love a little less each day.
Marriages used to last fifty years, now they last fifty weeks.
Couples keep breaking up even though true love is what everybody seeks.

I've gotten a lot of rejections because I don't have much money.
Everything gets dark when I begin to think it's sunny.
I have pain and anger because life goes this way.
I believe in love a little less each day.


Details | Randy Johnson Poem

The Craigslist Thrill Killers

Elytte and Miranda Barbour murdered a man just to get a thrill.
It is always very stupid and senseless when people kill.
They said they killed him because they wanted to kill someone together.
If you're wondering when they'll get out of prison, the answer is never.
They pled guilty to Second Degree Murder and other charges and got life.
Elytte will never be able to kill another person and neither will his wife.
When Troy LaFerrara answered the Barbours Craigslist ad, he didn't know he was in danger.
While in court, LaFerrara's loved ones were very furious and they expressed their anger.
The Barbours are only 22 and 19, they're young enough to be my kids.
If they were my children, I wouldn't forgive them for what they did.

(This is a true story about Elytte and Miranda Barbour who murdered Troy LaFerrara.)


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