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Tori Fraz Poem
I know you won't see this
but I must say how I felt the last half of year or so.
I was a coward
but for good reason
for I knew my love was a gross romanticization and was nothing true.
Yet still I wish to tell you of my diluted fancies and musings.
So here I write out this in hopes of moving on and letting go my childish crush.
Dear Brandon
Your smile made my heart leap and my mind lighten.
It killed my most depressing thoughts and made me giggle like a school girl.
I know this is a tired internet phrase, but your smile could cure cancer.
I saw a moodiness and deepness that I wished to know
but I think you keep that from strangers eyes
and I was too shy and awkward to reach out and touch it.
Anyone could praise you for your fantastic sense of humor;
A humor that made me burst out laughing at the most inappropriate times
and steal my attention.
You are delightfully weird;
weird and improper in the best way.
Your sense of fall/winter style is endearingly bad,
wearing nothing but sweatpants and the same hoodie for MONTHS.
It would of looked horrible on anyone else
but you pulled it off.
The way you walk is almost a graceful lumber.
All long, thin limbs finding their way through movement and space.
I almost told you that I liked your hands one time
but I thought that might be a creepy thing to say.
I did say something about your hair though,
about it being ridiculously long,
covering your bright eyes.
Yet again though, you pulled that terrible look off too.
I loved you in some odd, shallow way
but we were not even friends.
I gave you my number,
you never called.
I didn't ever see you with a phone but maybe I'm just making excuses.
I should of taken the hint
and I guess looking from the outside,
it seems like I did.
I was too awkward to pursue,
too insecure.
I thought I would bore you terribly
and you didn't seem very interested anyway.
I regret keeping my distance
but it could be for the best.
I don't know.
All I know is that,
for a time,
you were the sweetest thing on my mind
and that I got butterflies every time I saw you
and even a bit (immaturely) jealous when you talked to lovelier girls then I.
I know that you still pop up in my dreams
and my heart
from time to time.
I know I loved you in that weird, fanciful way that young girls love.
I hope life brings you happiness
and that you stay the same quirky boy that I had the pleasure to meet all those months ago.
In short, thank you for existing in this world.
Sincerely,
Tori F
Copyright © Tori Fraz | Year Posted 2016
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Details |
Tori Fraz Poem
She feels like she's wearing a suit
that doesn't suit her soul
Will she take it off?
No
Why?
People would see her soul, bare and hollow
"No one truly knows me," she cries.
That's because she won't let them
She's scared
if she took the suit off
no one would care to know her
Is that valid?
Maybe
Is that healthy?
Probably not
hers is a tired soul
that dips and raises as it pleases
The dips are low and long
The raises high and short
Would anyone care to see the darkness setting in her eyes?
or would they just ask questions, make judgments, or shut her away
Could they understand the calm pool of sorrow
that sits amidst restless waves of anxiety and loneliness?
She thinks not
no one would take it as deeply or seriously as her
"depressed sad sack", "emo wannabe", "moody, useless child"
The impression she'd give is clear
So she's made a suit
ill fitting at times
yet livable
She's a well adjusted person
She's smart and considerate
She makes jokes and talks small
She's friendly enough to be liked
yet distant enough to never keep friends
awkward enough to lose potential love
The suit has it's draw backs
would she benefit from taking it off?
Maybe she'd find people who like her for the soul
not the suit
Maybe
Maybe not
Copyright © Tori Fraz | Year Posted 2016
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