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Christine Wessels Poem
This day I grow tired
and so incredibly weary.
My heart holds only dreams
of a Life unfullfilled
A Life not nurtured,
yet barely a glimmer
of the spirit that once was.
I do have memories of some things good
-not all bad,
But the fear that I am alone
is Like a fingerprint on my Life.
Shadowing, waiting to pounce,
always there, unshakeable.
It's the mirrors that hold me accountable
to my actions.
Proof positive that where ever I go
there I am,
Naked, vulnerable, and yes
still alone.
As I try to allay this fear,
one Lonely and painful pluck at a time,
It becomes crystal clear, that I alone
am damaging my soul to the very core
with each stroke of my hand.
I steal one Last Look in the mirror
and know that I alone
have self inflicted these blues
Leaves me to ponder one question:
Will I ever allow myself the strength and grace
it will surely take to heal my scarred soul?
This poem was written in hopes of begining the healing process for my self. I
have a disease called trichiotillamania. It is an obsessive and manic urge to pull
one's own hair until baldness occurs. I'm a 48 year old woman, married(with kids
& grand kids)and have been doing this since the age of 5. It coincided with the
begining of my stepfather raping and torturing me which lasted until the age of
thirteen. This disease has me trapped and is NEVER letting me go. There are
two inflictions in regards to my hair pulling in this poem, one must know about
my disease in order to understand this poem.
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
I do have purpose
that stays near
a constant reminder
of my inner child
As my conscienceness
shines through to create
a new perspective
I break out of my cocoon
Only to discover that
I find places where
the sanctity of my being
does not flow as it should
My intuition is what
guides me though
there is no longer the
desire for the constant
upheaval of tragedy to strike
upon me
On my journey I have
discovered that there
are many hidden truths
So as my spirit ascends
I am inspired by my bravery...
If I am frightened
by the visibility that
standing proud does to me
then I shall stand even taller
No longer will I fear
the degradation that
once was my shadow
there is no home here
for the shame any longer
And I will no longer be
swayed by the fragments of defeat
When I become sorely tempted by
sheer exhaustion
And I think I can't
make it on my own
I will remember that
I am walking this
road of life for me...
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
Much to the chagrin of those who
would prefer to lay witness to
one's failure's,
Imagine not for the slightest
moment that our will has become
so weak as to allow compliance.
Where once our vision may have
been clouded and our boundaries
seemed forever shattered,
know in the end that our naked
sense of vulnerability truly
is our saving grace.
For it is that woundedness
if you will that lends itself
to a higher awareness.
Do we not gain strength
from our painful life experiences?
Should we not strive harder to conquer
life's old injuries?
By following our instincts step by
step along the very road that has
been paved before us,
And yes expecting at times that
there will be treacherous curves
we must allow for,
Oh to throw caution to the wind
and laugh in the face of failure
invites us to celebrate our
mightiest strength of all...
COURAGE...
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
Oh guide us eagle spirit
towards our newborn spring
Lend your wings for our safe
passage, your voice we'll
follow as you sing
From your birdseye view, our
food and shelter we will gain
over mountains through our valley's
your wings beat loudly on the plain
Shadow us from danger, give us
flight on wings wind-swept
carve the light through
rained on forests, soar the
plateaus steer the steppes
Once spotted land for living, tip
your left wing then your right
we shall bless and name your
spirit 'Soaring Eagle Fear No Flight'
This is picture inspired by my favorite artist.
Her name is Bev Doolittle and she creates
amazing illusion works of art/ Mostly native american.
It is up to the viewer to stand back and find the
image(s) within her paintings.
This painting is called 'Season Of The Eagle'
But i put my own title to the poem i was inspired to write.
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
As I clutch the hand of the little girl
who walks in my shadow..
I dare to dream
As I gather my self-will, prepare to hold my
ground against even the slightest hint of danger..
I dare to dream
As I distance myself to look for progress,
the distance soon becomes a measure of my emptiness..
I dare to dream
As I look in the mirror, I see her now with
widespread wings and know that real change
is about to take place...
I dare to dream
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
I'll stop being
so disappointing
If you'll stop being
so disappointed in me
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2008
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Christine Wessels Poem
Sand carvers paintings
engulfed in magic circles
mandala symbols
(My very first attempt at haiku)
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2008
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Christine Wessels Poem
You know you are having a good day when...
It dawns on you that you can light your own fire
You know you are having a good day when...
You feel at peace each night when you retire
You know you are having a good day when...
They say "Mom it's from you our life's inspired"
You know you are having a good day when...
All you have is all in life you desire
I just had myself a great day...
How 'bout you?
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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Christine Wessels Poem
Travel
this garden path
grown in pixelations
worldly colors lain before me
I weep
If only i could share the breathtaking pic this was inspired by... Heaven on earth, AAAHHH
Actually another poet (another site) suggested i use more imagery and blah, blah, blah
This form cinquain leaves not much room for error, so every word has to
be meaningful, (besides it's officially only my 2nd attempt ) i even like the way 'cinquain'
rolls off my tongue, CINQUAIN, cinquian,, Everybody, all together now cinq ... tee-he
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2008
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Christine Wessels Poem
Roses are red, violets are blue,
i wanted a grandson and god gave me you.
I knew we would fish, sometimes all day long,
and then we would end our night in a song.
I know you're getting big,
and someday you'll drive your rig.
But never forget, you'll always hold
the key to my heart.
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Love Grannypants
p.s. get yer fishin'pole ready
'cause there's fish to be had at the riverssippi
(My grandson always called the mississippi river,
the riverssippi)
Copyright © Christine Wessels | Year Posted 2007
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