Home » Poems » Best » Jack Horne » Best Jack Horne Poems

Best Poems Written by Jack Horne

Below are the all-time best Jack Horne poems as chosen by PoetrySoup members

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Anno

There once was a banshee called Anno,
Who was learning to play the piano.
She was doomed to fail,
And started to wail -
And now she’s a world class soprano.

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Bluebell Woods

I walked into the lonely wood,
And stared about the place I stood:
The beauty of the tree-lined glade,
With shafts of light that pierced the shade,
All filled me with a sense of awe -
The bluebell carpet best of all!

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Colonisation

The beauty takes my breath away,
I know my kind will want to stay
On this new world that I have found -
It’s somewhere in the Milky Way.

The creatures of this wondrous place
Are scaly lizards, wild and base.
Such monstrous things must be destroyed
So we can spawn another race.

I take a sample of the turf,
Report the planet has such worth,
Then leave and freeze the world in ice
To kill these dinosaurs on Earth.

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Jonson's Ghost

The inn had gone to waste: I’d sold it off in haste.
Awaking in the gloom, as orbs lit up the room,
I recognised the ghost of Jonson, the old host.
I said, ‘I thought you’d come’ - and poured myself a rum.
He shouted, ‘Hey, you louse, how dare you sell MY house!’

Internal rhyme/slant rhyme

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Baboon

There was a baboon in my bed,
I thought it appeared to be dead,
So I turned out the light,
But it chattered all night
And swung off the curtains instead.

For PD’s Silly poem contest

Details | Jack Horne Poem

The Farewell Performance

His rheumy eyes film over and he brushes away a tear
with the age-spotted back of his hand.
He watches himself as a young man –
handsome, vigorous, full of joie de vivre.
The members of his orchestra now arthritic.
Or ashes long since scattered into oblivion,
like the beautiful soprano in the film.
But for the duration of the archive footage
they are all young again.
The film ends and their philharmonic youth
is silent memory once more.
He struggles to press rewind but his gnarled finger 
presses fast-forward by mistake.
He thinks that time has been on fast-forward
and wishes he could find the rewind control for his life.
With a sigh, he presses play and fades away,
watching his immortal youth.

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Ebenezeer Scrooge

Ebenezeer Scrooge
Suspected subterfuge,
And his transformation seems extreme
For what was probably just a nightmarish dream!

For Andrea’s Christmas Clerihew contest

Details | Jack Horne Poem

School Homework: Jobs I Hated

I hated homework - what a bore;
And wanted time to play.
I’d tolerate that stuff at school,
But that was during day.

We didn’t have a dog or cat,
But Teacher didn’t know:
Those creatures chewed my homework up,
And I was full of woe.

I’d lost my bag, my homework too,
And wasn’t it a shame,
That all my work had been in vain.
My teacher knew my game…

One day I gave up fighting it -
I saw I was a dud -
And did my homework on the bus…
Then dropped it in the mud!

9th November, for Sara’s Jobs contest

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Cherry Blossom

laughing children throw
handfuls of cherry blossom - -
an old couple kiss

for Susan’s Cherry Blossom contest

Details | Jack Horne Poem

Dr Ram - For the Better Than Gold Contest

He says the nicest, kindest things
And doesn’t know the joy he brings;
A friend to all, the young and old:
Dr Ram’s words are better than gold.

I hope this doesn’t make him blush,
To hear his fellow poets gush;
A comp on him is rather bold:
Dr Ram’s words are better than gold.

His comments brighten any day -
As with you all, I have to say -
When they made you they broke the mould:
All your words are better than gold.