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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
I have the right to ask for what I want
I have the right to say no to requests or demands I can’t meet
I have the right to express all of my feelings-positive or negative
I have the right to change my mind
I have the right to make mistakes and not have to be perfect
I have the right to follow my own values and standards
I have the right to say no to anything when I feel I am not ready, it is unsafe or
violates my values
I have the right to determine my own priorities
I have the right to not be responsible for other’s behaviour, actions, feelings or
problems
I have the right to expect honesty from others
I have the right to be angry at someone I love
I have the right to be myself
I have the right to feel scared and say “I’m afraid”
I have the right to say “I don’t know”
I have the right to not give excuses or reasons for my behaviour
I have the right to make decisions based on my feelings
I have the right to my own needs for personal space and time
I have the right to be playful and frivolous
I have the right to be as healthy as those around me
I have the right to be in a non-abusive environment
I have the right to make friends and be comfortable around people
I have the right to change and grow
I have the right to have my wants and needs respected by others
I have the right to be treated with dignity and respect
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
This heart of mine has
So much love to share
So why has my life
Been full of despair
This heart of mine
So loving and giving
But alone with my pain
I am barely living
This heart of gold
Always battered and bruised
Constantly in pain
Always abused
Eternally frightened
Alone, hurt and sad
Will my life ever
Stop being bad
My zest for life
All taken away
Never living
Just existing each day
Abuse and threats
To me always spoken
To hurt me, put me down
Leave me broken
I find it so hard
To relax and trust
Because my life always
Turns to dust
Mental abuse
Physical pain
My daily life
Again and again
My hopes and dreams
Broken and shattered
From years of hell
Being abused and battered
I need to feel loved
To get something back
No more pain or
Being under attack
People have said
I have a heart of gold
So why am i always
Left out in the cold?
I want to have a
Life worth living
Not one where i
Am the only one giving
Now i have Paul
So i hope and pray
He's the one to take
All my pain away
But if ever we argue
My fear is so real
No one knows
The terror i feel
I want to be happy
Feel safe and grow old
With him by my side
To come in from the cold
So with my guy now
I hope to be free
To live at last
Allowed to be me
I have never felt safe
From all the pain and harm
But that is improving
When I'm in his arms
He'll never understand
My hell, tears and fear
My burden of life
All of these years
With his help
I can start to live
To get some love back
For all that i give
I now want to feel
Finally accepted
For who i am
At last be respected
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2007
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
Why do I get all the hurt?
Why do I get only pain?
Why do I still live in hope
When it all seems in vain?
Why did I get abused?
Why did I get hit?
Why was I raped?
I just don’t understand it
Why am I always so frightened?
Why am I always so sad?
Why does everything I touch
Always turn so bad?
Why does nobody listen?
When I talk of my fears?
Why can no one see
My despair, pain and tears
I have beautiful sons
Who can never show me love
What have I done to annoy
God up above?
Why when I finally meet
Paul, the man of my dreams
Do people persecute and hurt us
And rip us apart at the seams?
I deserve to be loved
I deserve to live
I deserve some happiness
I have so much love to give
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
This year of hell
Is over at last
I hope and pray
It’s now in the past
But still I feel
That I’m not believed
How do I change this?
I feel so aggrieved
I do feel stronger but
There is a long way to go
I still feel panic
Being anxious and low
I’m terrified of conflict
Arguments and rows
So how can I change?
Live here and now
I need to move on
Get a life at last
Try to get over
My nightmare past
I’ve started to change
Begun to feel free
But I do still wonder
Will I find the real me
I crave to be held
To feel safe and loved
No longer alone or in danger
No more hate, just love
I may be too soft
Lead with my heart
But I’m starting to change
Move on from my past
I love my children
They are my life
I will always protect them
Throughout their lives
They have been damaged
And abused by their daddy
It is no surprise
They acted so badly
They are good kids
Deep down inside
They’ve changed for the better
They really have tried
I know they are hard work
Their special needs are tough
They want a loving daddy
To treat them as such
I want them to feel
Loved, happy and free
To have a childhood
Better than me
I’m so afraid
Of what their lives’ hold
Will they survive?
Be able to grow old
In this mad world
Will they cope?
With everyday life and
Achieve their hopes
I want to hold them and
Protect them from hurt
Unlike me, not be treated
Like worthless dirt
They deserve more
Than the life they have had
I will make sure that
Their life is not bad
I want people to see
How they are now
Not how they behaved
Two years ago
Things are better
For all of us
Beginning to live and
Starting to trust
Give us a chance
Help us live free
Accepting my children
Accepting me
Helen-Louise
26th February 2008
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
For Giving Me Love ……Undiluted
For Making Me Feel……Excited
For Showing Me Freedom……No Restrictions
For The Bubble We Are In……Perfection
For Sweet Kisses and Words…...Never-ending
Soft Touches and Whispers…...No Games or
Pretending
For Hope and For Joy
And For Truth
You, Paul, Are My Boy
For Giving Me Love…...Unrestricted
I Love You In Return
That Is Exclusive
By Helen-Louise
5th October 2007
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
Life is hell for us
With Social Workers and such
They make me so angry
I hate them so much
Especially Noelle
She makes me so mad
When she leaves though
I am crying and sad
They accuse me of things
I have never done
She thinks I am abusive
To my beautiful sons
My boys are my life
They always will be
Without my boys
There’s no reason to be
They give us no help
Just doubt and blame
It seems to me
They are playing games
I feel lost and hopeless
Frightened and scared
They won’t admit they’re wrong
They really don’t care
They will not believe
My hell all those years
They don’t seem to care
When I break down in tears
All my fears and terror
Bad feelings and pain
Rise up inside me
Again and again
A life of bad memories
Deep inside and repressed
I’m so lost and alone
Useless, depressed
How do I prove
What I say is true?
When no one believes me
What do I do?
I feel so let down
A criminal accused
In a living nightmare
Abandoned, confused
All I wanted was help
Love and support for my boys’
A decent life for us all
With happiness and joy
All the worry and stress
Brings all my trauma back
All the fear and terror
When I’m under attack
This is like hell
I don’t know how to feel
All I know is this
Living nightmare is real
When will it be over?
When will they leave us alone?
When will they stop
Invading my home?
I thought I had left
Behind all my pain
But now they have brought
It all back again.
So much for my new life
Being happy and free
But now I feel
That’s not meant for me.
That really hurts
Makes me so sad
What have I done to deserve
A life this bad?
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
Just five little words
They mean so much to me
Spoken from Paul’s heart
Only meant for me
Just five little words
That I will always treasure
Simple words that mean so much
They are beyond measure
Just five little words
They helped me to break free
They gave me courage
To take my boys and flee
Just five little words
Helped me change my life
Spoken with love from Paul
Who asked me to be his wife
Just five little words
Which stop me feeling scared
I never dreamed I’d find someone
Who wants me and cares
Just five little words
They still make me cry
To me they mean the world
From my special guy
Just five little words
Spoken honestly and true
And those five words are
No more hitting for you
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
Sometimes when I look at you
I can hardly believe you’re mine
I think about how attractive you are
How caring, sensitive, interesting and funny
And I can hardly believe that out of the whole world of people
I was lucky enough to find you
Sometimes when I look at you
I remember what it was like
In the beginning, when we were just getting to know each other
I’ll never forget the nervous excitement I felt every time I saw you and I smile every
time
I relive the tenderness of our very first kiss
Sometimes when I look at you
I get lost in memories of special times we’ve shared
In daydreams of the happiness we’ve yet to discover together
Every time I look at you I realise how much I love the love we share and how very
much I Love You Paul.
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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Helen-Louise Savage Poem
My man, lover, friend
You mean the world to me
I thank you from my heart
You’ve helped to set me free
I never dreamed I’d find
A special guy like you
I’ve found the love of my life
I will be proud to say ‘I Do’
I’m so in love with you
It makes me want to sing
You mean so much to me
I’ll be honoured to wear your ring
I never want to hurt you
I never want to row
I never dreamt I would be
As happy as I am now
The only problem I have
Is if you get cross and yell
Then I get terrified
Because of my life of hell
Don’t ever hurt me
Always be loyal and true
5 words you said that mean so much
Were ‘No more hitting for you’
I have so much love to give
I want to share it with you
I am loyal and caring
I never want to lose you
You tell me you love me
Want us to be together
Well, I promise
You’ve got me forever
I’ll be at your side
In everything you do
All through our life
It’ll be me ‘n’ you
I’ll always be here for you
Always honest and true
Because, my soul mate
I’ll never stop loving you
I love it when we cuddle
I love the way you care
We’ll be together forever
And this I swear
All that I want
Is us to last forever
Because, my love
We’re meant to be together
I’ll always support and help
In everything we do
So please don’t ever doubt
That I’m totally in love with you
Now you know how I feel
With my happiness and joy
Never forget though
I will always love my boys!
X By Helen-Louise X
Copyright © Helen-Louise Savage | Year Posted 2008
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