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Maybe I miss

The locked poem of my heart
When unbound by its chains
Will reveal it's frozen secrets
Thaw them out again

All that can be mustered
Of this broken and abused soul
If I bestow this gift
Please hold it with care

And please don't break me again...

Maybe I miss a place to call home
That wasn't broken and shattered
Now I search and continue to roam
For somewhere that truly matters

Maybe I miss chill weekends nights
We'll cook something special to desire
Or maybe we'll order out something just right
Your company is all that I require

Maybe I miss not being alone
Not being the only one to fend
Share somebody who I can call my own
With time I eagerly spend

Maybe I miss having people to love
Who know me inside and out
Relationships with them that fit like a glove
Never wanting to be without

Maybe I miss those special events
That my younger self took for granted
Oh the sights I saw, and places I went
And now months go by empty handed

But now I'm a vagabond upon this realm
A home I might never again find
The weight of this world just overwhelms
My fragile state of mind

But now what was once a waterfall
Has frozen up and sealed its magic
With love it may again dethaw
And heal what was traumatic

But now life is only survival
Not living, but just existing
Keeping from being suicidal
My battle that's forever persisting

Abused by a father
Unloved by a mother
Everything I gave
Is buried in the grave

Betrayed by friends
Again and again
Hanging over a ravine
Stuck in the in-between

The girl who emerged
Had drastically diverged
Survived the demons
To become one too

This is who I am now
Will you love me just the same?
Or perhaps..you never knew?
The girl who stood in her place

And maybe she's the one I miss...

Copyright © Harmony Lane

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Book: Shattered Sighs