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Best Limerick Poems

Below are the all-time best Limerick poems written by Poets on PoetrySoup. These top poems in list format are the best examples of limerick poems written by PoetrySoup members

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Unapologetically yours by Chaudhari, pratishtha
Salad, Salad, Salad by Ellison, Jack
It's Intangible by Ellison, Jack
Must Stuff Our Faces by Ellison, Jack
THERE'S NOTHING WORSE THAN AN INAPPROPRIATE VERSE by ALLISON, JAN
Shirley by Rigoler, Maurice
It Envelopes Everyone by Makama, Funom
The Factor lies Within by Makama, Funom
Window of Teenage hood by Makama, Funom
Playing to an Own Goal by Makama, Funom

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The Best Limerick Poems

Details | Limerick Poem | |

Word Piles

“You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” — Dr. Seuss

There was an old man, he was tattered.
He’d piled his words like it mattered,
all of his life
through trouble and strife,
while his wonderful wife, well, she nattered.

Oh why do you pile those words over there?
They’re taking up space much needed for air!
Forgive me my dear,
I like them quite near,
without them, I simply don’t care.

He pushed them and nudged them, those words that he loved,
but his missus attacked them, often ungloved.
The man only smiled,
which left her unstyled
like all of her wits had been shoved.

One bright summer day the man took to flight,
off to the place we often call night.
His wife was aghast
as she stared at the past
and those piles of words in her sight.

She sat in their midst, breathing a sigh,
missing her husband caused her to cry.
The silly old pest,
could only but jest,
she missed him, but didn’t know why.

Until she began to shovel and scoop,
all of those words piled like poop,
throughout her house
by her missing spouse.
The thought made her lips start to droop.

Suddenly a baby word drew up quite near
and nudged at her eye, releasing a tear,
which started a flood
turning words into mud
who then giggled out loud with good cheer!

Contagious it was—all of that mirth,
more precious than gold (what it was worth)
turning around
her well-practiced frown,
releasing a smile on the earth.

What she’d never known, what she’d never seen,
was, though he’d loved words, she was his queen.
The joy those words brought
was what he had sought,
to give to his wife who’d been mean.

Now she saw through the mud his bright smile,
amplified much by the pile,
full of whipples and wots
and twisted what-nots
plus words not used in a while.

The funny ones, much in disuse,
discarded and thought too obtuse,
pronounced with a quack,
or maybe a glack,
were enough to plant grins on a moose.

So she gathered those words with great care
She even put some in her hair.
They whispered to her
like a kitty-cat’s purr
and her smile made onlookers stare.

She threw out her lonely big bed
and slept on those word piles instead.
The man of her dreams,
although silly, it seems,
was the hubby she’d deemed loose at the seams.

Finally she really did love him, him and his odd-wording ways.
She reads his words without ceasing, on her many, colorful days.
Her nights are now filled with chatter
and nattering, nat-nat-nat natter.
Those words and hers, joined as one voice, singing a word-piler’s praise.



John Wulf  08-11-15 for Dr. Seuss Quote Prompt Contest

Copyright © John Wulf | Year Posted 2015

More great poems below...


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Looks Can Be Deceiving

There was a young girl whose silk skin
Was sewn up with some thread and a pin.
     It would drive the men mad,
     That sleek layer she had,
Well, until she took off her silk skin.

By Anne Currin

Copyright © Anne Currin | Year Posted 2012


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Gathering of the Golden Girls - Soup Convention

Four “Golden Girls” seated at a table
Grey streaks our hair, but minds remain stable
     Convention is underway
     Michael has something to say
He opens our meeting with a fable
 
It’s about a tortoise that beats a hare
Some of the “fast writers” begin to glare
     Joyce, Francine and Barbara know
     It takes time for verse to grow
We’re the queens of rewriting; this we swear
 
Iolanda’s introduced to read her book
“Lava of my Soul,” no gobbledygook
     We’re mesmerized by each line
     At the end we toast with wine
Joyce says, “Now those words took some time to cook.”
 
It’s Karen’s turn to read “Silent Whispers”
We see tears falling into John’s whiskers
     “Tears of joy,” Francine exclaims
     For Karen’s Best Seller fame
Applause rings out from grateful listeners
 
After the “meet and greet” it’s nearly dawn
The crowd starts to thin as our comrades yawn
     Joyce, Francine call it a night
     But Barbara still sits upright
We two remain when most others are gone
 
One poet called us “Late Night Cockroaches”
This indignity did not encroach us 
     We call ourselves “LNCs”
     Awake in wee hours with ease
Waiting for our princes to approach us
 
That’s when the James Brothers draw near
Peranteau and Fraser, to make it clear
     With two erotic writers
     LNCs pull “all nighters”
Knowing that we can propose; it’s Leap Year!
 
 
*Entry for Michael’s “A Table of Four” contest
At my table: Carolyn Devonshire
Joyce Johnson
Francine Roberts
Barbara Gorelick
 


Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

His funeral

That he planned his funeral is factual
And being a prankster quite actual
He prerecorded his voice
So when we kneeled on the joist
He said, "Hi there! Don't I look natural."

Copyright © Judith Angell Meyer | Year Posted 2008


Details | Limerick Poem | |

GIMME A BRAKE

A UFO went to land in Dakota
But the brakes didn't work one iota.
        It didn't take long
        to decide what was wrong
seems the space ship was made by Toyota!

Copyright © RALPH TAYLOR | Year Posted 2010


Details | Limerick Poem | |

SPRING FORWARD

In spring time fresh flowers are rising New lambs in the fields – not surprising In every hedgerow and tree Lush beauty will surround me It’s heaven; there is no disguising 02~16~15 Contest: Spring Forward -Debbie Guzzi Syllables checked 9 9 7 7 9

Copyright © JAN ALLISON | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Finding BigFoot

For BigFoot I searched everywhere.
In all the Northwest, he’s not there!
Then I thought I might know
where a BigFoot might go . . .
so I went where the barbers cut hair!

To fit in and be like the rest
of us humans, he’d look his best.
so I went to each shop
where I thought he might stop
to have hair removed from his chest.

To Hollywood soon I was led.
I’d heard of a man with a head
like a wolf’s, full of hair,
making everyone stare.
What I found was Hugh Jackman instead!

Then a man I could not see too well
crossed my path at a fancy hotel.
When I got a good look,
that was all that it took!
It was furry but small, Steve Carell!

The last guy I saw in that land
of Hollywood stars acted grand.
That guy, very hairy
made Big Foot less scary.
He went by the name Russell Brand.

From Hasselhoff to Bradley Cooper,
some hairy guys are super duper!
I kept at my quest
when to the southwest
I moved, for I’m always a trooper.

I searched high and low, five years more,
but by then, I had grown very poor.
I had always liked shoes,
so thought I would choose
a job in a classy shoe store.

Like Carrie in “Sex in the City,”
I loved my work, and I looked pretty
with swank heels on my feet,
yet I felt incomplete
There was no Mr. Big! Such a pity!

But while working one day without care.
I looked up  Can you guess who was there?
This odd creature so tall
made Shaquille look too small.
And he hardly could hide all his hair!

No fresh smelling flower was he,
but kindly I sensed him to be.
As I stooped down to put
my hand on that Big Foot,
I knew fate had led him to me!

Written by Andrea Dietrich 







Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

To the POETS who broke my heart-A thru Z

~Arthur Vaso~

He danced on hearts and graves
I became his words slave
Romantic a wink,
and I start to think
for me his bleeding heart raves.


~Lyric Man~

You fiddle a melody
that I know not meant for me
I can't help but smile
in romantic denial
your lyrics are my poetry


~Sebastian Aaron Baez~

Tongue like sexual honey
Writing right on the money
but so far away
and there will you stay
because you thought my proposal was funny


~Tim Smith~

All knows we played a game or two,
And you left me right out of the blue
There is no jealousy
coming from me
since I know that your honesty is true


~Adam Hunter~

So close but yet still far
I know just who you are
You're on my list
Yet you resist
Next round, you buy at the bar


~Richard Lamoureux~

Your words are so really real,
Your truth are the real deal
commitment on your finger
made for a real stinger
your a great guy that makes me feel.


Now its time to break all hearts in return
For you all my sweetest men, poetically I burn.
Keep on writing because you rule
and your souls are just dang cool.
Together let us all love laugh and learn! :)
Love you all my soup guys and gals :) Mwah
Happy Valentines day!!

For Contest: A valentine limmerick

Copyright © Casarah Nance | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

The Contest

(The Contest)

I once knew a gentle poet boy
Pretending to be the real McCoy
   He lost two in a row
   This is no game show
At the end, I felt used by the playboy


(The cold rain)

I wish I could take back the HM
Don't know why you chose to condemn
   I thought we were friends
   Now I see through crystal lens,
How you think all your poems are a top gem

(Not a reason to hate)

I once knew a girl with heavy makeup
Behind her smile, her face was corrupt 
   She was in it for the race
   Wanting all her poems to place
She did not win, now she's all worked up
    


SKAT

Copyright © SKAT A | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

HE'S SMOKIN'

Sir Henry was playing his flute He also was smoking cheroot But when his attire Was soon caught on fire I’m guessing he’s not so astute! 04~18~15 Contest: Famous Einstein Quotes – John Freeman Albert Einstein Quote ‘The only source of knowledge is experience’ ~awarded 1st place~

Copyright © JAN ALLISON | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

A Very Lousy Dragon Poem - unlike you-know-who's

There once was a dragon of note
who found out he couldn't go vote
so he started to lobby
which became his new hobby
and a briefcase became his new tote.

At the statehouse he began a career
of burning the governor’s ear.
He said “it ain't fair
that you really don’t care!”
(and sometimes) “Hand me a beer!”

Soon the nobodies all got the right
to vote and make known their plight.
So they favored the dragon
and overloaded his wagon—
They called him “hero” and “knight.”

Dragon got fat as a cat
which had eaten too many a rat.
He lost all his fire
and any desire
to throw through those rings his fine hat.

The lowlies then had no more hero
and quickly lost all of their cheero.
If you think that is bad,
have you ever been had—
by a pundit, politician or zero?

There once was a dragon of note
(it's redundant, but easy, by rote)
who became one of them
(and not just on a whim).
That dragon became an old goat.

There should be a moral right here
one that you’d absorb with great cheer
but, alas it would seem
(unless they work for YOUR team)
lobbyists are really quite drear.

Copyright © John Wulf | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

The Arc Of Life



Travelling through life resembles an arc We start out as a child emerging from the dark To reach a crescendo Establishing a tempo Then sadly we all must eventually disembark © Jack Ellison 2015

Copyright © Jack Ellison | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Moonshine

Observing the brilliant moon's shine
o’er the Isles of smiles is fine
a magic elixer
an attitude fixer
works better than any fine wine



*maayong gabii sa akong rayna

Copyright © John Wulf | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Justice - A Parable

A woman gave birth to a son
named Justice; he had little fun.
If he wanted to play,
his mama would say,
“But only when Justice is done!”

Poor Justice, from morning till night,
tried hard to do everything right.
By the end of the day,
he still could not play,
for his time to do chores was so tight!

His life was a crime with no play!
We all know that crime doesn’t pay.
But were I in his shoes,
having paid all my dues,
I think I might just run away.

Well, sure enough, Justice did flee
and ended up in Tennessee.
With no place to belong,
he felt sad till along
came a girl who smiled tenderly.

Looking ragged, he asked (with some shame)
if the young girl would tell him her name.
“Can you guess?” said the Miss.
“Here’s a clue. It is this. . . 
Those who have me don’t take all the blame.”

The young man did not have a clue
what her name was; it was all new.
He’d never hear of
- yet soon grew to love -
this girl  and her charming name too.

Today Justice likes more his life
because this girl lessens his strife.
He learned her name well
when in love he fell
and Mercy he took for a wife!


Written Sept. 6, 2015 by  Andrea Dietrich

Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Coin With the Same Face on Both Sides

.





                                Once again the coin has been tossed
                                to choose between just dirt and dross
                                Insults from ridge to ridge
                                on how to build a bridge
                                in town without river to cross




.

Copyright © Ruben O. | Year Posted 2010


Details | Limerick Poem | |

GROWING Together

After six months of living with you
I found it amazing how we grew
     As the passion seemed to fade
     The worst signs of this charade
Were the clothes I couldn’t fit into

Lovemaking’s a form of exercise
And then when it stopped, what a surprise
     I asked you if I looked fat
     You said, “There’s no truth in that”
As you consumed even more French fries

But the doctor’s scale would tell no lies
Some 25 pounds my weight did rise
     Still you refused to believe
     Just continued to deceive
Till friends noted YOUR increasing size



By Carolyn Devonshire
For Judy’s “Short Poem Contest”

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Guessing Games

From the moment we met, he played a game
Started out telling me to guess his name
     And when I asked, “Don?”
     He responded, “Right on!”
This lucky guess led to more of the same

“What do you think I do for a living?”
I hesitated, had some misgivings
     “Steer the space shuttle?”
     Got no rebuttal
So on this roll, I felt I was winning

“Bet you a kiss you don’t know where I live”
My mind was draining faster than a sieve
     “A beachfront villa?”
     (The truth would kill ya)
So many guessing games I now relive

After dating three months, his wife found out
Burst into our love nest, called him a lout
     Eight kids behind her
     All hungry they were
Don Juan he was, but surely no space scout

If you meet a man and he asks you to guess
Take it from me and avoid this distress
     He may be akin
     To Rumpelstiltskin
The anger later is hard to suppress

Now I’ve learned to turn the tables on men
Asking them to “guess” again and again
     My private life hid
     Won’t remove the lid
And I’ve convinced some that MY name’s John Glenn


*Entry for Tracy's "Make Me Giggle" contest

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2010


Details | Limerick Poem | |

What's the Buzz

If I were a fly, I would take my place
In the halls of Congress where haste makes waste
     I’d buzz the House Speaker’s ear
     Because it has become clear
The voice of the public has been misplaced

Perhaps a good buzz would open their ears
Before they explore new spending frontiers
     Pork barrel projects still grow
     Let’s Make a Deal’s a game show
This game must end now as we’re in arrears

I’d surely make a nuisance of myself
I make a heck of a pesky black elf
     Sit on cups before they drink
     Lay eggs on collars of mink
Then wreak havoc with Obama himself



*Entry for Michael Falotico’s “Fly on the Wall” contest

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

A Farm Yarn

When we were young boys on our farm.
A fish tale never meant any harm,
We oft were given a look,
When from such a tiny brook,
We claimed a fish as long as your arm.

But then our neighbor named Meg,
Beat the fib and put us down a peg,
By claiming from the same brook,
With not a worm on her hook,
She caught a fish as long as your leg!

Well that truth was quite hard to beat,
Then Summer beat a hasty retreat. 
Winter changed the fishing world,
Meg turned from tomboy to girl.
And now this fishing tale is complete!




For John Freeman's "Fishing Limericks"

Copyright © Robert A. Dufresne | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

The Oscar Wiener Dog

A dachshund named Oscar was he, which adored trick or treating with me, so I had me some fun when I sewed a cloth bun, for a Halloween weenie he’d be. On his costume I added a trim mustard yellow, but though he’s not slim, he’s no Oscar Mayer, so don’t raise his ire by taking a bite out of him! For the Dachshunds contest of Rob Carmake(oops, that was CarMACK. haha)

Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2015


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Valentine's Day Musings

All year long he puts my heart on a shelf
No surprise I’d rather be by myself
     If there’s no Valentine treat
     From this worthless hunk of meat
He can go on making love to himself

Remember there’s an “I” in Valentine
So if no one’s around to say, “Be mine”
     Just splurge – get a new hairdo
     Party with an all-girl crew
Check out the divorce rate and say, “I’m fine”




*For Francine's Valentine Limerick contest

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!

Copyright © JSLambert Mister ROBOTO | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Boozer Not a Loser

A billionaire, he knew each wine by name

Todd Worthington of inheritance fame

      Blindfolded he taste-tested

     Fans watched so interested

Until a street boozer put him to shame


Fred stumbled in, challenged Todd to a race

Though Fred was not skilled in fine social grace

     Drank Todd under the table

     Todd out cold, Fred was able

To acquire high society’s embrace



Written June 18, 2011 
for Francine’s “Bottle of Wine (Fruit of the vine, when...” contest”

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire | Year Posted 2011


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Ice Cube Pie

I always wanted two slices of ice cube pie
“You only get one”, was the standard reply.
I don’t know why I did
But since I was a kid
It was my favorite treat on the Fourth of July.

The pastry is known by all our relations
Since the recipe’s passed down for generations.
Every bite you’ll savoir
Exceptional flavor
But remember, don’t settle for imitations

Long ago, my great Aunt tried experiments
By leaving out one of the ingredients.
Once Uncle took a bite 
He stared out in fright
And barely survived that bad experience.

My oldest son, Johnny became quite wise
He grew up like the others, before our eyes.
His passion for confection
Was a gainful connection
When he opened the first ice cube pie franchise.

Soon after that, we made our first million
And played in the sun with friendly Brazilians.
But to our surprise
We saw ice cube pies
On bamboo platters next to our pavilion

Right away we knew this was an infraction
Without delay our family took action.
We found a private eye
Who loved our ice pie
But his research left him broken in traction.

It was apparent to us that that kind of job
Was endorsed by the brutal ice cube pie mob.
But we didn’t frown
Or give up and back down
We were going to prevail; oh, yes siree, Bob!

With a meeting of minds we gathered resources
And then undersigned the following courses.
To make sure our ices
Sold at cut-rate prices
To knock competition off its high horses.

So back at the shop we assembled platoons
To build enough pies to reach to the moons.
And made plenty dough
That allowed us to mow
Down the cube racket’s, knuckle dragging goons.

We now manage an ice cube pie monopoly
Sales started smooth, but then turned choppily.
So we eased the frustration
With another vacation
But guess what we saw in downtown Mexicali?!


Copyright © David Fisher | Year Posted 2013


Details | Limerick Poem | |

Rock Paper Scissors

Rock Girl

You are scissors, and all you can do is to cut all those paper hearts through. But I’ve hardened my heart and before you can start to destroy me, I’m going to SMASH you!
(Gosh, PD, they won't even permit the ~sign in the title!)

Copyright © Andrea Dietrich | Year Posted 2011