Fire and ice fill these veins, dreams
are no longer sufficient to quell the
turbulent tides that quarrel within.
Deep within butterflies dance out
of sync, and the heartstrings await
the magical fingers of the harpist.
Solitudes aura is cold and clammy,
there is a dark side to this loneliness
that I cannot comprehend, it leaves
me wanting. This lonely castle wall
where so many poets have cast their
words, thrown their hearts to a new
horizon or a setting sun, is where I
await the tide that brings you forth.
For I know you are real, we have
touched in another time, drank the
wine, made love, danced the dark
hours in passion. Dim my vision
since you waltzed these eyes, my
Queen come to me, come with
haste, fill these arms, fill this
heart, kindle the fires and melt
the ice. Bring me stars , bring me
paradise, give me lips as soft as
snow, give to me your love and
these castle walls would crumble
before your smile. Patiently I
stand these walls, scanning the
seas for that sail that conveys our
union, lonely but so in love.
? ...GONE... ?
I never knew until that moment how bad it could hurt
To lose someone you never really had,
Days can be tough and at times cruel
To much for one to bear alone..
I was hoping that you would say
If I feel that I can't hold on any longer,
You'll take my hand and we'll go through it until together.
When the time comes, that if I can't stand on my own again
And I won't need you anymore, I will let go.
I will let go, if that would make you happy..
If you're lonely and your heart feels empty,
Just tell me and I will step inside.
But if One Day, you'll be needing that space for someone else
Don't worry and gladly I will give in my space..
Like in a painful, sad love story
It's amazing how easily to fall inlove with someone,
Who simply smiles, talks or stare at you
The only hard thing to do is to make that person fall for you.
They say that time heals all wounds, but all it's done so far
is give me more time to think about how much I miss You..
Okay, so maybe time heals most wounds, right?
Then why does it feel like it?
The wound is getting bigger and bigger every second.
Maybe Love is just a beautiful dream, and then we wake up..
Just as they always say when somebody leaves
When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness,
Instead keep your head up high and gaze for the stars.
For that is where broken hearts have been sent to heal..
What is the opposite of Two?..
...A lonely me, A lonely You...
They say relationships are like glass
That sometimes it's better to leave them broken
Than risk hurting oneself in trying to put it back together.
Lost in my heart, lost in my mind, I'm lost in your eyes
Entire days, weeks, months, ...a blur...
Flickers of light in the darkness
Only to be enveloped in shadow once more.
And yet within the shadows of pain
Might be the faint flicker of love once fel,t
And that could make all the darkness worthwhile
Because a single "I Love You"
Is worth more than a thousand goodbyes..
I'm tired my Beloved..
of chafing my heart against the want of you,
Of squeezing into little inkdrops and writing it.
Ask me why I keep on loving you
When it's clear that you don't feel the same way for me.
The problem is that as much as I can't force you to love me
I can't force myself to stop loving you..
So I tell myself sometimes..
'Count the gardens by the flowers, never by the leaves that fall.
Count your life with smiles and not with tears that roll." ..
Though sometimes, these tears say all there is to say
And the scars don't ever fade away,
I am thankful that for a moment
I once met You, I once felt you look my way.
I once felt You within me, in my heart and mind
I once was happy and alive with You
I once Loved you and still Loving You... xoxo
P.S ..KYHYCYILY.. always.. ? ? ?
I stood by your graveside this cold winters day.
A heart broken with sorrow that won’t go away.
I called out your name and shed many a tear.
And hoped in my heart that you would appear.
God took you from us that fine sunny morning.
Our lives now shattered without any warning.
Your work here on earth has finished this year.
Your books and teachings you spread far and near.
It was a pleasure to know you for sixty odd years.
And when my time comes I will have no fears.
You will be waiting to greet me as oft times before.
When I call to your house and knock on the door.
Each night when I lay my head down to sleep.
I will ask the lord your soul to keep.
And if you find any time away from your books.
Look kindly on me as I walk in those woods.
tum bhi toh abhi khamosh ho aur hum bhi
aur na jaane kya kehti hai yeh khamoshi...
uss din jab tum mile the humse yeh nahi pata tha ki yeh mulaquaat hogi
aur mehsoos hua tha tab ek dard dil mein jab tut gaya humara woh benaam
sa rishta aur phir ban gaya ek naya rista lekin yeh nahi pata tha ki, yeh naya
rista hoga yeh khamoshi...
haan kuch lamhe ki thi yeh galatfehmi ki awaaz lekin jab tut kar giri yeh awaaz
kaanch ki tarah , toh bikar gayi aur ban gayi yeh khamoshi...
kuch sawal the tumhare jiske jawab tab nahi the paas humare, aur jo the sawal
humare woh kahin dab gaye aur bankar rahi gayi yeh khamoshi...
kabhi agar phir se mann main aaye yeh sawal tumhare toh padh lena meri yeh
aur jawab phir bhi na mile toh padh lena humari inn aankon main ,jahan boonde
bankar behti hai yeh khamoshi....
nahi thi galti tumhari jo tum hume samajh nahi paye...
naa hi thi galti humari jo tumhe hum samjha bhi na paaye , phir waqt beeth ta
sa chala gaya aur reh gayi yeh khamoshi...
ab toh subah se shyaam aur shyaam se raat beet jati hai,waqt bewaqt dil main
dard ke toofan sa uth ta hai ,phir bhi chup rehti hai tumhari aur meri yeh
kehna hai toh bahut kuch tumse magar kahun bhi toh kaise jab humare vich hai
jaane anjaane jo dard maine diya hai tumhe aaj phir woh dard batati hai
tumhari yeh aankhein aur tumhari yeh khamoshi...
ab itne tut gaye hain hum bhi ki bas yehi khwahish reh gayi ki tut jaye yeh sab
doori aur bol uthe yeh khamoshi...
Eleven – “Novelism: The-Newness-of-the-Old”
(for: Deborah Guzzi, my poetess-commentator)
… & the argument continues
… That nothing new exists of itself in Nature is now a widely reputed view. Nothing is new
but for the very thought of its novelty! Yet, the Newness-of-the-Old, an idea which I call
Novelism, permeates the entire horizon of the anti-novel ferment of our Age of Fashion.
It is true that Nature is full of repetitions; Creative Repetitions, of course! If not
History would have died repeating the same tales. However, it isn’t true that Nature is so
reluctant in giving us new things. We would rather contend that through her seeming
change-less fixtures, Nature shows her constant dynamism. Yes, all these fixtures, the
endemic sufferings of her staticism, celebrate her novelty in endless forms.
O, think of them: of all the activities of the Mortal star, Man; of his crafts: those
apparent webs of his genial faculties that applaud him as the Genius of Creation – what is
so old & traditional but our ordinances of Sleep & Wake, Work & Feed, & other vigilant
demands of our cultures? & what isn’t tempered with our spirit of fashionism in such
Nature may, then, be afraid of innovation & be accused of abject conservatism, only by
those who are lazy to follow her rhythmic changes. Everywhere these rhythmic drums beat so
When we think of the joyous travails of the Sun; of the virginous reputation of the Moon;
of the crudity of the beast; of the swift & endless voyage of moving waters into Seas &
Oceans; of the swift slippery driving styles of the Fish; of the Sky laughing at the
endurant soils of our Earth; of the Seasons in their equilibrium songs; of the ever-happy
& singing Birds – what notes of dynamisms we hear! & in neglecting such notes, aren’t we
heading for a dance of the heroic pessimism?
While we consciously neglect the novelties in a society by demanding for a kind of
novelty, aren’t we adding to the Crises of Nature? – but, Nature’s personality can’t be
forced to possess unnatural garments that we extend! Then, let Ideas possess the Society,
not Individuals! Ideas lead to newness, although, ideas are created by men; men go out of
the Stage more swiftly than their ideas. If the Idea rules the Setting rather than the
Voice of Man, then Novelism, the-Newness-of-the-Old, would thrive; & thriving, she could
bear her drivers, the men of ideas, along the paths of Innovation!
(… & the argument continues)
Close your eyes for awhile my friend, I heard there lies a moon far behind the black sky, I heard lovers were dancing beneath, can you hear them singing? I can feel their tipsy steps making rhymes on floor, and smell of perfumes filling the air, I heard a sun rises to brighten up their world, and birds do sing them charming melodies at morning, they say they have roses in colors and beautiful trees in the streets, and have they told you about the sea yet? They say it smells so wonderful and the delicate air of seas caresses their cheeks with soft wet breezes, oh my friend, what have we seen in the dark but the fragile ghosts that we are!
“Hush” whispered to me, “I lighted up a moon inside my heart and I smell lilies and jasmine in my nose, my dreams play tunes my heart dance on, they speak to me all night and there I see a starry night floats above, I feel the warmth of a sun in my soul as it hugs tight, whispering to me hymns of love and joy, lightening candles for hopes which had accompanied me amongst the dark, why have you closed your eyes my friend? Look through the colorful roses I painted for you with eyes wide open, let the lights off so you would see clearer, let the lights off so you can brighten up the world that hides with you, for my friend, what have we seen in the dark but the free spirits that we have become!
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My face in these eyes;
Shining towards the sky all the time
My shape is a novel with thousands of chapters.
My hair is a forest of thoughts.
My eyes are decades of worry.
My lips are opened door.
My ears receive the howls of the wind.
My nose is a statue looking for lost spirit.
My body is too weak as Hercules was not,
My heart is arrested there searching for freedom.
My back is affected by the past as an ancient wall.
My hands are wings of bird have just escaped from a trap.
My feet are quickly driving me towards the future.
To nowhere I’m running without fixed level.
I’m sentient enough with my semblance.
My face on the mirror;
I watch a tidy man’s scene with many interpretations.
Have a gaze at; it is deep and brightening.
Realize the motivation:
What really goes on with this reflection?
There would be no disturbance;
Just give that white pen.
I will write about your beauty.
I would show some reality about this mood.
How mysterious are the man and I?
Do not take us with you in this heat time,
Do not push us inside your dreams.
You will see such dusk,
Due to the night is so dark.
And I’m just a night bird.
My face on the murmuring stream;
Wet and dry, it is alternative all the time.
Do you like this race?
All this vitality is carelessly being wiped away,
Looking forward the oblivious chair
Who has the key of stopping the tragedy?
It is forevermore, a simple destiny-
Not imagination but messy
It causes a bit horror inside the iron core.
What is beyond the mountains?
The needles in the smooth path are confusing the soul.
The soul is still running wild under lovely trees.
Trees are inside scary jungle.
Though, there is an exit.
I’m fixed in my way,
And I’m fixed in my way.
There is a hand out there
and it is named Love;
don't be alarmed,
for she is a lovely hand and she smiles at you,
yet I can't find her to save my life.
If you find that hand called love,
please could someone shake it for me,
yes- please shake it for me.
As all I’d ever termed wondrous bliss unexpectedly died -
As my fantasy of a reality with destruction did collide -
My hopes shattered around me like glass in countless pieces,
Fragments suspended in mocking beauty as time freezes…
The clock hand ticks forward and it all crashes to the floor
My knees hit rock-bottom when I could take no more
All I now see is blackness where once there was color
Gone appears the light from the sun and its fervor…
I begin to walk away from the pond of shattered dreams
But the glass is in my clothes and cutting through my heart, it seems
Perhaps I am too close, the smoke is clouding my full view-
Glance up at the tower, instinctively know what to do…
Run up the steps; one, two,three hundred endless stairs
And I barely catch my breath, or have time to fill lungs with air -
Before the ground beneath my feet crumbles into sand
Loud thunder above me rumbles as I fall back down on land…
And I hit rock-bottom again
Thinking this must be the end
For surely no human can go through this pain
And still see rainbows through the rain…
The whole world seems gray and black tonight
With not a speck of pure, identifiable white in sight
Nothing is untouched, gone is everything -
Then how do I glimpse in that crack a thin white string?
Among the dirt, surely this uncorrupted clean string is not real
But just to verify the hopeless doubts, I reach out a hand to feel
And to my electric surprise, it’s most tangible indeed
I yank it out attached to a note, uncrumple it and read:
“Verily, with every hardship comes ease” [Quran 94:6]
That white thread...
Seven years I’ve been waiting for
A Christmas with you I wish for
Just like the other years that passed by
My wish for Christmas never gone by
A thought bothered my mind
How do you feel fine?
How do I feel fine?
If it breaks your soul it breaks mine.
Everything you have to sacrifice
A tear drops in your eyes
I wish I could make it dry
But I too can’t stop myself to cry
I hope he will grant my wish
If not now, maybe next year
I would still be waiting here
The same wish that I wished.