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Personification Humorous Poems | Personification Poems About Humorous

These Personification Humorous poems are examples of Personification poems about Humorous. These are the best examples of Personification Humorous poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Personification | |

A Tribute to a Major Appliance

Sub-titled: What’s in YOUR Fridge?

Please allow me to introduce myself:
My name is Ms. Fridge A. Daire
I stand tall among my lesser cohorts
and MOST of them really look up to me

However, I have two problems:
First, I’m FED UP with my owner
He's always opening my door
reaching deep inside (Oooh yeah!)
helping himself to my goodies
without EVER cleaning me out
or scrubbing me from top to bottom
Doesn’t he know a woman has NEEDS?

Then there’s that stupid stove next to me
who’s constantly flirting and making passes
Says he wants to ‘warm me up’ and ‘defrost’ me
bragging that I’ve ‘got the hots’ for him
which absolutely makes my Freon boil!
Of course, I always give him the cold shoulder
by freezing him with my famous icy stare
and responding, “Simmer down Four-Eyes"
followed by: “I don’t date shorter appliances"
But he’s always cooking up something else...

So I asked my owner to move me to another spot
He said he would if I wasn’t so heavy...HEAVY?
What kind of thing is THAT to say to a lady?
He also claims there’s no other place to plug me
PLUG me? Who does he think I am anyway?
I found it quite crude and vulgar...ANYWAY
I suggested an extension cord and he blew a fuse!
Geez, no wonder he’s still single...


Copyright © Tim Ryerson | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |


My finger hovers Shall I turn you on today You lie there tempting me I need to know what buttons to press But when I press those buttons You respond immediately and burst into life Every Wednesday you leave me little messages I try to ignore them but you are so persistent You want to update I want to write I press any key to continue And you ignore me and update anyway My husband is fed up with the distress you cause me He has a cunning plan to fix you forever ... No more automatic updates From now on you and I can live together in perfect harmony I can press the right keys to update you when it suits ME Now I am in complete control! Computer Poem Contest – Carol Eastman 29th March 2015

Copyright © JAN ALLISON | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

Diary of a Salmon

Day 1
Today I passed a shad,
on his way to Prince William Sound.
He protested that I go downstream.
But to the current he is bound.

Day 2
I encountered a fly on the surface.
But it was the ploy of a man.
To eat me was his plan.
My escape did him a disservice.

Day 3
Today I came across a bear.
By accident I entered her lair.
Her approaches, she kept deploying.
And her cubs were winy and annoying.

Day 4
An assault from an eagle came upon me.
From above, the attack I did not see.
A glare threw him off by an inch.
Certainly, I’m lucky to be free

Day 5
Today the river was crowded,
by comrades going to the same place.
Because of them my passage was shrouded.
And I couldn’t get them out of my face.

Day 6
My journey has been long.
Against the current, one must be strong.
The objective of my journey may end in vain.
At least, unlike others, I went against the grain.

Copyright © Daniel Carter | Year Posted 2016

Details | Personification | |


I lie in bed dreaming sweet dreams
Smooth sheets caress my body
Curled up with the one I love
You gently call my name 
Whispering sweet nothings in my ear
Singing me the sweetest song
I turn over and I reach out for you
Don’t you just hate it when the radio alarm clock goes off?

Jan Allison
22nd August 2014

Copyright © JAN ALLISON | Year Posted 2014

Details | Personification | |


You hold out your hand and reach for me 
I am the one thing you desire
You cannot wait to turn me on 
Guess you know the right buttons to press
I start to get all hot and steamy
I am the one to quench your thirst…
Where would we be without our kettle?

Jan Allison
21st August 2014

Copyright © JAN ALLISON | Year Posted 2014

Details | Personification | |

Dancing Bears

giant bears
waltz: One, two, three.
One, two, three.
right on
Off they


Entry for Contest: Shall We Waltz?
Host: Kim Merryman

*in the Air Force we had a program for Airmen who were struggling to meet the physical fitness requirements, which we referred to in a sort of tongue-in-cheek manner as "The Dancing Bears" program.

Copyright © The Grahamburglar | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

Temptation in Black and White aka The Oreo

          (a poem a deux)

        The Oreo is there.
        Out of sight, it calls to me.

Oreo: Love! Come to me. Pleasure awaits.
Me: No. Will power! I will not succumb.
Oreo: Think of chocolate...tongue-lingering, senses-reeling, so appealing...
Me: I am stronger than chocolate.
Oreo: Beneath the surface lies cream. Pure, unadulterated cream.
Me: I have a new book to read.
Oreo: Love, be reasonable. You know you want me.
Me: I don't.
Oreo: You do.
Me: Don't.
Oreo: Do.
Me: Don't.
Oreo: Do.
Me: Don't, don't, don't!
Oreo: (seductively) Milk.
Me: (groan)
Oreo: I adore bathing in milk. It makes me so soft, so vulnerable, so wet.
Me: No! Not there. Don't touch me there!
Oreo: A veritable orgy of ecstasy in your mouth.
Me: O stop! Don't! Stop. Don't---stop---don't---stop---don't stop.
Oreo: My love!
Me: Wait for me, I'm coming. O God, I'm coming!

Copyright © Mary Oliver Rotman | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

End of Story

Positioned at the end of a line
Between one line and another
Preventing confusion and clutter
A traffic cop
Signaling to stop
Fewer mistakes made
If more attention paid
The sentence not written by me
I knew where I should be
End of story...period

Copyright © Barbara Campbell | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

Three Sister Owls

Last night I asked my sisters
Why they were not hooting
Little owl said no one missed her
She would hoot when she so suited

Middle owl asked why did I care
Hooting is not what it used to be
Go 'google' hooters if you dare
For more than you ever want to see

'Hoot hoot hooray,' I hooted proudly
Wise owl like me knows to overlook
I will try to hoot quite loudly
And follow directions in the owl book

I helped little sister build a warm nest
Assured her everything would be 'owl' right
Middle sister decided it would be best
If we showed 'whoo' we are tonight

Darkness falls, noise is clearer
An incessant convolution of forest sounds
Each in a place where all can see her
Three sister owls hooting upside down


Written 2-3-2016
For Owls Personification Contest by Eve Roper
2nd Place

Copyright © Susan Gentry | Year Posted 2016

Details | Personification | |

The smell

Im from over there
Im from him 
Im from her
Im from that thing there
I like to linger – especially under your nose
I like to hide in mouths, in clothes, in beds, in bathrooms, in kitchens in toilets
I come from nowhere, travelling by wind

Copyright © Alexander Seal | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

Aces and Diamonds

Aces and diamonds are the best of friends
they love each other, they enjoy each other’s company
they are two decks of cards whose spirits are inseparable
on  the  blackjack table in the casinos
They just two decks bonding relaxing side by side 
like, John and Yoko, Sherlock and Watson or Johnny and June
no spades, no clubs, no kings, no queens, no jacks
not even hearts can breathe the air between them
no matter the many times they are being shuffled 
drawn, flushed or dealt by the gamblers
because the laws of probability will never berate
the significant  bond shared between an ace and a diamond


                                                                             Written by: Mia Pratt, 2015

Copyright © Mia A.S. Pratt | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

I'm Okay Being Cold--A Tribute to a Major Appliance

I used to be called ice box.
To protect my integrity, I need to be cold.
At any degree, I am o.k. with myself.
Made of steel; I am strong.
To move me, would be difficult.
Any tears are now frozen within me.
What is inside of me remains good and safe.
See the light and
You find things of substance and value there.
I do not mind being called frigid.
If I should break down;
You would be sorry,
Not able to feed your needs.
You use me and take me for granted.
I have been here at your convenience, 
To get what you want!

Copyright © Barbara Campbell | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

A Refrigerator - for Contest

I was made in the Antarctic
and they filled my freezer with its ice, 
enough to last 
until I reached the shores of France.
I had more ice then,
but it was dirty - not my style.

They put me in a selling place -
they call it "magasin" in French -
or you would say, a shop.
Then came excitement - a nice buyer!
She looked me up and down
and bought me quick.

And so I sit inside her home
as a South Pole treat.
I like to feed my owner wondrously!
She'll eat frozen peas today at lunch. 
I wonder how she'll woo them
to her teeth.

Copyright © Julia Ward | Year Posted 2015

Details | Personification | |

Clubs and Spades

Clubs and Spades
they are always getting into trouble
they are as mischievous as coyotes
always sneaking away from the casino table
making excuses not to perform duties 
at the game of Blackjack

Every few minutes they must constantly
seek intermissions during the game of blackjack, 
repeatedly angering those ferocious gamblers at the table
Clubs and Spades would wander away
 like vacationers on a plane to Abaco
and would never return to the deck
until the Kings and Queens 
sent for the Jacks 
to locate them like a police bloodhounds
and drag them back to the deck of cards on the table
compelling them to complete their duties
at the game of Blackjack
                                                                       Written by: Mia Pratt,2015

Copyright © Mia A.S. Pratt | Year Posted 2015