You were beautiful,
my tiny child,
wrapped tightly in my arms,
close to my heart.
I listened to you breathing.
I counted your fingers
and your toes.
you cried out to me
and I loved you
with every ounce of my soul.
Will you hear me
when I cry out?
Will you hold me close
as I held you then?
I remember the day
You took your first step.
There was no stopping you.
Your feet gave you freedom
to explore the world
like never before
but danger lurked.
I opened those doors anyway,
you to the world.
Where will you be
when my legs
no longer run?
no longer work?
Will you realize
that I love
about that day
you first tied your shoe.
We tried and tried
to get that rabbit
in that hole
and you finally did it.
You pointed your toes
for everyone to see
how proud you were.
I am proud too,
of my writing
and my drawing,
of my needlework
and my cooking.
But my hands are beginning to ache
and my fingers will not bend.
I will lose the things
that make me proud
except for you.
Hopefully not you.
Will you let me
brag on you?
Even tell wild stories
that are a bit beyond the truth?
Will you be proud of me too?
I waved good-bye
that morning when you left
on that large, yellow bus.
I was so scared.
I know you were too.
You waved at me bravely
through the dusty window
but I saw the water
forming in your eyes.
You came home, however,
full of pride and joy.
You sang the alphabet song
and got most of it right.
You practiced for hours
until you could sing it
even in your sleep.
whether I took
my pills today or not.
if I told this story before.
I even forgot once
who you were
and it terrified me.
is my treasure
the only thing I have left,
and I heard you make
fun of me
for not remembering
that I gave you the
same gift as last year.
Will you love me
when I no longer
know who I am?
You came home blushing
from the glow of
your first kiss.
Your first love,
the one you thought was real.
You talked about him non-stop.
You changed for him. You gave.
But he left you anyway
for a blue-eyed girl
and I held you
while you cried for him.
I too have a
The love of my life
left me after
He left me here
to live life on my own
while he moved on
to another realm
And I cry for him too.
I long for his shoulder
and strong embrace.
I feel betrayed
because he and I
made a deal
that we would never
leave the other alone.
Yet I am alone
sitting in an echoing house
with no hands to hold.
You welcomed her home today-
your tiny baby girl.
She has your eyes
and possibly your toes.
I see you counting them
as they roll me
into the room.
You finally came
It has been a while.
You look up at me
with tears in your eyes
"Will she tie my
when I get old? "
Little wishes on great big stars.
Daughter, I make a wishes for you.
Keep on growing and keep on smiling.
And I'll keep loving all that you do.
Little dreamers wishing big things.
The world is your stage to display.
You can sing and you can dance.
Enjoy all that comes your way.
Little hopes in a great big world.
Nothing can stop your free spirit.
Make some noise, play a beat.
It's beautiful music when I hear it.
Little kisses from my now big girl,
You're growing up so fast it seems.
Pretty soon you'll leave the nest
And fly after all of your dreams.
Little girl I love you,
And I love you even more.
Because I made a wish once,
And you're what I wished for.
Written April 09, 2014
COLORS for MOTHER,
Looking towards the blue sky
Every color camouflaged around the cloud
Tears of sadness began to dry
Watching all the colors display out loud
The dark needing to fade
The grey in my life finally made sense
Colors overlapping, forming a beautiful cascade
Shoulders of tense
I imagined your smile against the yellow sun
Giving light to all the matter of the things I've done
A warmness in my red heart-- together in the long run
Creating a new purple and pink sensation-- as one
My new rainbow doesn't come in black and white
Giving reason to follow the joy of light
A gift of colors remind me everything will be all right
A guide blazing throughout the night
Lavender plant blooming for the world to see
A garden of every color just for me
Everyday I see the sunrise, rising up in colors of glee
My Rainbow will appear everyday without rain, no matter how deep the sea
Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet, the perfect skin tan
My sweet angel your the largest spectrum where ever rainbows span
I wrote this poem for my mom.
I carry my mother
like a rock in my pocket
that I just can’t seem to throw away
It serves me
it just weighs me down
When I first found it,
when I first picked it up
and started carrying it with me,
I thought it so beautiful –
I could look at it for hours
But, like my mother,
it never looked back at me,
never grew warm under my loving gaze
For the longest, I was blind to that,
Blind to anything but the beauty,
blind to the cold, hard,
beyond-remote nature of the rock,
of my mother,
I carry my mother,
a thought without weight
And she’s heavier
and she’s colder
than all the stones
By the time I recognized her
immutable, emotional unavailability,
I had run out of joy,
felt depleted of hope –
But I could not,
for the life of me,
stop seeking a beauty, a warmth,
inside her heart
Could not stop
that one day this stone,
deep inside my pocket,
Might just become
its own opposite –
Change from hard to fluid,
from cold to warm
But my rock, my hard burden,
will only turn to water
When my mother
Can a child ever forget, how deep a mother’s love abides
All those days since birth, till now I’m grown she guides
Remembering her smile, so tender, so warm as her embrace
More than soothes away my pain, my fear of failure and disgrace
Even in my dreams she comforts, her voice, her scent would stay
Never will her being mother stop, till when I’m old and gray.
26 March 2015
Contest : Acrostic on Mother's Day - 1st Place
Sponsor : TAMMY REAMS
Bestowed with femininity,
wisdom, elegance, and grace,
exemplifying dignity, daughter of the human race.
X chromosome integrity
ordains attributes endowed,
according by propensity, a nature kind and proud.
Beauty and vitality
anoint her noble gender,
magnum opus artistry imparts celestial splendor.
Her marvelous complexity
gives complementary disposition
to valiant masculinity for a perfect coalition.
yields licentious pleasure due
the wanton sensuality of erotic pas de deux.
woman becomes by thy behest,
sacred vessel of posterity, with honor ever blessed.
My sweet child
Be on guard
Be on guard of the man
Who plays on your heartstrings…
Not with flirtatious smile
Nor with flexed muscles
Not with devouring eyes
Nor with intellectual prowess
Or clothes so fine
No, these you can resist
You can set boundaries
And be done
The threat, false alarms
Their charm easily undone
Your defenses will withstand
The groping hand
The false charm
No, don't be alarmed
Oh, but child
My precious sweet one
Be on your guard
I beg you
Be on your guard
From the man named, “POET”
A man who wields words
Who crafts and designs them
Like a carpenter with wood...
Who makes them into jewels
With a jeweler’s touch...
Who makes them sweet delicacies
That simply melt in your mouth
He can shape and design his words
To fit your every need
He writes down your dreams
As though they were his own
His words an homage
To your beauty
The light in your eyes
The way you entice
Your captivating smile
Your dark tresses
Or the curve of your hips
BE ON GUARD
Oh, dear one
Be on guard
For he means to take you
To sweep you away
In the tide of beautiful rhymes
The rise of fall of passion
Making your body move in time
He means to ensnare you
To capture your soul
He means to dominate
To slowly undress
Intoxicate with his words
So you forget common sense
He wants you to eat from his hands
Choice morsels of love
While he whispers in your ear,
“There's more where that came from.”
Be on guard
For words cannot pay
Your rent or expenses
Cannot save your day
Words won’t be there
When you cry in the night
They won’t be able
To turn on that light
Words won’t be your lover
With hands nice and slow
That touch you in places
Words can never go
Listen to me
Stay away from those poets
They’ve got potency
They will woo and bewitch you
Throw fairy dust in your eyes
But at the end of the day
Only a few don’t tell lies
My child, my sweet
Get a man who will be
THERE IN PERSON
BODY and SOUL
With hands that caress
And with eyes that speak
Of your body in that dress
Spoken words make you weak
With lips that touch yours
That say you’re divine
That lick from your navel
That sweetest of wine
Stay away from those poets
Be on Guard
Save your life!
For a poet, my child
Is the greatest danger in life
The greatest beauty
The greatest dream
The greatest heartache
The greatest strife
Be on guard
BE ON GUARD
SAVE YOUR LIFE!
Eileen Manassian Ghali
Why, Momma, why?
Was I not deserving
Was I not good?
Was I too frail?
Did you send me away
Because your own life
Why, Momma, why
Do I still secretly wail?
Asking myself what did I do so
wrong? How did I fail?
What you called rebelliousness
Was the only way I knew how
to stay strong sometimes, I'd
stay up all night looking after you
Got banged and bruised so that
he wouldn't hurt you
No one else did that
Isn't it true?
Did you ever think about my wounds
That was the only way I knew to
Instead of helping me
You banished me through lies,
Stripped me from my home,
My siblings, my life
Withheld your love
Because I tried to take my own life
But did you ever stop and think that
Perhaps something in me wasn't right?
Why, momma, why?
Does your absence whisper in me
A forever sorrowful lullaby and
Although, I miss you I love you more
each day that goes by
I forgive you wholeheartedly
Despite that yesterday, I cried
I wouldn't hesitate to wipe
The tears from your eyes if they
ever again were to meet with mine
What makes the decision
To flick the switch
To end ones life
For the sake of it
Bullied at school
Fork in the road
To let death rule
Daughters and sons
What ever affects them
They just can't outrun
Sadness and tears
By all left behind
Will they ever understand
Another hour passes in this stale room
The beeping of machines plays an ominous tune
Lights are dimmed, to match the mood
Out in the hallway, nurses chatter
Important matters to be tended to
Our night of hell is their typical work day
Bursts of laughter every now and then
I wonder to myself what they find so funny
She whispers for her mama
who has been gone for years
Breathing labored, cold hands shaking
She reaches out like a child
I take her hand, choking back tears
It’s me, mom. It’s your daughter
I stroke her forehead and she relaxes
My back aches from leaning over her bed
And another hour passes
mixed with rain pelting on the window
I feel alone
Eyes closed I remain standing
Begging my muscles to be strong
Longing for daylight
I’m taken back to vibrant days
Listening to the rain
And another hour passes
*It's difficult to watch a parent aging, suffering... I am blessed that my mother is still with me, and I will treasure the moments we have left. I'm sorry for anyone who has lost a parent ... especially if it was unexpected.
It will hurt like a tattoo guns sting
as the ink infiltrates your skin.
Your first love will be like a tattoo on your heart,
always remembering the blessings and pain he gave you.
Be with a person who fills you with fluttering hummingbirds
even after the first and second and tenth kiss
who drinks the nectar of your demons and sucks them lifeless.
There will be men who you think will carry you forever
but after so long of holding
your feet above the water
they will throw you down.
They will not reach out a hand to pick you back up.
They will turn cheek,
kissless and forgotton.
You will stand with dirt palms
and fall back into his inferno.
There will be loves like this,
who convince you to prick yourself with safety pins,
the ones who carry guns on their backs
but never shoot to protect,
only to hurt.
The ones who drink all the water,
leave you parched in the desert of his mistakes
telling you that they are your own.
The ones who shoot arrows in your lungs
and you lye bleeding
believing that the color of your blood is true love for him.
The hour hand will spin around the clock
too many times before you leave him.
It will hurt.
You thought it was true,
but after the death of it
you will realize you deserve someone so much sweeter
than a bitter apple.
Love the one who doesn’t cheat you blind,
but instead comes to you with truths in his wretched palms
and waits for you to
but never gives up and never stops wishing that the past could rewind
that he could change the things wrong that he did to you.
Love the one who feeds your heart warm apple pie,
who cries in front of your children,
who drives them to school and hugs them when they get home.
Be with someone who doesn’t ask for you to change
but instead loves your mistakes
cradles them within his fabric lungs
breathes them in with a grin.
Love is an interesting thing.
You will be thrown out of a moving car to the side of the road.
Some will come running back to you.
Don’t jump back in the front seat,
until you find someone who buckles the seat belt for you.
Drives five under the speed limit,
takes things slowly and waits for you to be ready to accelerate.
I am here for you.
Remember me, the one who loved you first,
the one who will never stop loving you.
Come to me after he breaks up with you.
You can cry on my shoulder,
and ill wipe your tears with my sleeve.
Find a love who loves you the way
that your father and I love you,
the way that your grandmother loves you.
Find a love who already considers you family.
Who meets you
and looks into your ocean eyes
and drowns peacefully into your heart.
She showed me the clouds
and how to walk on the ninth one. A dreamer.
In the absoluteness of her mind, no barriers
exist within existence
as if her battles have
been won. I think she craves to fly,
past those clouds---another possibility
to make possible, a challenge
to challenge. Or dream about.
She probably thinks that when I complain
I cannot see the clouds,
the way she did when things got rough
in life. Of course, I beg to differ.
She dreams. I live. I don't
keep my eyes on clouds all day
as if there is nothing else to see
to make me understand the world better.
I suppose I'll rest one day, exhausted
by the what-ifs and whys, while Mama smiles
and points upward.
Big toe, little toe,
Threes toes in between,
Cover with a blanket,
So they can't be seen.
One leg, two leg,
Arms, shoulders tummy,
One great big hug,
And a kiss for your mummy.
Love has loved before, never quite like this,
When I sleep at night, it is her face that I miss.
Born from my blood and my body, my heartbeat,
Eyes like an angel, her laughter is silly and sweet.
Days tick by as she grows up, reaching new heights,
It becomes a battle, some moments word fights,
We are learning as we are growing, going forward.
When she says "I love you mommy," love is heard.
Follow me my little angel, together we will prepare,
For life that isn't perfect, for each other we will be there.
I love you more than there are stars in the sky,
I love you higher than all the angels can fly,
I love you more with each passing hour.
I am the stem and you are my flower
Opening the closet of narra doors, I sweep through
organza skirts and gemmed ringlets; my hair
ruffling aimlessly upon scalloped kerchiefs
smelling decade - old hyacinth, Mom’s favorite
ambrosia: she would lift her anklets
in tiptoed hums, ”night and day, you are the one..”
Evenings touched her candle hands; hands
that soothed wounded knees from jackstone fights;
her fingers caressing a pony -tailed girl’s wrath
with piano keys rippling into a gentle moan;
“night and day you are the one…”
And i am delivered from my tempestuous rants.
From nowhere, the porcelain mirror gazed at me;
her rhythm of silence billows, cradling my nights
with each veil of her almond eyes
that enter into my irises: a serene sight
too close, much too tight I clung to her unspoken word.
Through years, I grew like a bamboo shoot: her quiet smiles
and music walked me through reality’s maze.
And how I would wail bearing the grim of hard study,
coughing late, late hours of reading toil…yet,
she stayed like a moth with charm flushed
in a wind of calm gaze, ebbing .
And only Mom could melt my temper
when my raging soul paused to wonder
at her light’s glow: oh, her feminine beat illumined
more lamplights dancing inside this rebellious head…
and now, she hovers around me.
I become her eyes, chanting, “night and day,
you are the one” ; never balking at my surreal conquests.
She is gone bequeathing warmth into my torched flights
without question; with much love dripping
from her graceful movement, straying all through
these my breaths: “night and day, you are the one…”
Carol Eastman's Story Poem Contest
My thoughts they roil like waters dark
in the abyss of blackest night,
with memories of mother’s bookmark,
of Longfellow read by lamp light.
She called, in the room around me,
the patter of other small feet.
Her gentle voice fetched angels .
Oh, the rhymes, they astounded me
like lullabies soft and so sweet.
All fearsome shadows, she’d dispel.
Maxine, my queen, read Tennyson
and the Charge of the Light Brigade.
A little girl dreamt of caissons
roll, and thunderous cannonade.
To be so brave, the small child mused,
mother her precious, heroine;
what would it take to stand so strong
without father, and not confused.
What words could be the linchpin
to right mother’s tell-tale wrong.
Such sad inspiration, mother,
oh, how I wronged you by being born,
though I loved you above all others.
Some thoughts of you make me forlorn.
Bring back the tales of mother goose,
three small kittens and their mittens.
Return the vision of your smile
the happiness your warmth induced,
let your spirit comfort, lighten
night, if only for a little while.
Please love yourself,
My daughter wrote
As we chatted away
About my upcoming trip
And yet my tears spilled over
As I bared my heart
To my 19 year old daughter
The joy of my life
The light of my eyes
The reason I go on with life
It’s for her
I try to survive
And push on
For she still needs me
And she wrote…..
You need to appreciate yourself more mami
I can't imagine my life without you
Just thinking about my life without you in it
just makes me wanna break down
Please mama for me
Please love yourself
I dunno why it's so hard for you to see how incredible you are
She knew all my reasons
And yet she asked
Desperate to pull me out
To help me see the light
To remind me of who I was
Who I still am
And I soothed and comforted her
Knowing she’d worry
Her daddy away
And her Mama all alone
Locked in her room
Crying the night away
Yet she was the strong one
A shoulder to cry on
And after all the tears those words of hers brought
I thanked her for loving me…..
And she wrote
I can't help it. You're amazing. You just need to give yourself a chance
Come here mami we'll have so much fun
And I smiled through my tears
Grateful for the blessing I have in her
And my heart decided
For a little while longer
To fight the good fight
To let the vivacious Mommy she knew
Come to life
The one all her friends loved
And said was “so cool”
I'd ask her to go on
And to try...
To love herself...
...For the love of a daughter
Eileen Manassian Ghali
I am mother (father) sister daughter
Favourite aunt, SELDOM rant
Pan Flute player, dragon slayer
Own nothing pink, at least I think
Teach Sunday school, kids find that cool
I am not to lean, I’m sure you’ve seen
Curly hair, I seldom swear
But if I do, God help you
Sing in a choir, now I’m on fire
Love my dog, I want a blog
I am very kind, at least in my mind
Love good movies, never been much of a sleaze
I just gave you a look inside my book
So for now I take a bow.
I am female
Sorry I just found a fluffy beautiful pink bath robe.
Written by Brenda Meier-Hans
Frank Herrera’s Contest:
Life is full of rules baby girl, that you need to follow.
When chewing bubble gum, spit it out, don't swallow.
Hold on to your mama's hand when walking through a store.
If mama tells you no once, don't be asking anymore.
When you hear mama counting from five down to one,
That is not your cue to go wild, scream and run.
Take off your muddy shoes when you enter mama's house.
And when daddy is sleeping you be as quiet as a mouse.
Find the brightest star every night to make all your wishes.
Be sure to give your mama a billion zillion kisses.
Life is full of little rules that you have to do.
Rule number one is never forget how much mama loves you.
She birthed me a star...
Her inner galaxy well travelled.
Seized by womb impact...
Silence - Rattled
Tone tormented yet blissful sigh...
Return to the source - yield rescue the cry...
Triumph this claim as we draw near...
Partake in this memory...
We both share.
red splotches on her night gown
still oozing down her face
“I fell again.”
She looks at us
with that same wobbly smile
“I’m Ok! Don’t worry. I’m OK!”
I can’t see
a clear liquid oozes down my face
Mama is dazed
clutching her face
Couldn’t light the stove fast enough
We thought a bomb had hit the kitchen
War time years
Everyone running around
Mama burned her face
“I’m Ok…I’m fine.”
She tries to smile
I can’t see clearly
watery haze of tears
along with the smoke
Mama gasping for breath
Mama going red in the face
“Mom, are you ok?”
Another coughing fit
Can’t get the food to go down
I pat her on the back
Will this be it?
Will she choke this time?
Muscles that don't work
Tears streaming down her face
I’m…Ok…..I'm OK now."
That lying smile
Her hand goes up
I can’t see
Double tear vision
Life is unclear
“You’re afraid I’m going to die, aren't you?”
Kind brown eyes
Looking into mine
They are filling up
the wobbly smile is gone
she lets her tears speak
Oh….to talk to talk about it
What can I say?
What can she say?
She crushes my body to hers
Neither of us can see
Blinded by tears
She’s in a place I can’t reach
“Mama, can you hear me?”
“Mama, listen to me!”
“Mama, do you believe?
Jesus can heal you!
Do you believe?”
“Yes,” a whisper
I can't see
Eyes of mustard seed faith
“Forgive our sins!
In the name of Jesus
Be healed, Mama!”
Eye lids fluttering open
Mama is still on the wheel chair
She’s bound…not free
I don’t see anymore
My head drops to my knees
I get dizzy
I drop things
In the shower
“You have MS TOO!
It has come for YOU!”
I can’t see
Shower water mixes with tears
Do you SEE?
DO you HEAR?
DO you FEEL?
No wobbly smile
No one to be strong for
I'm not alright!
In dedication to her MAMA, Angel Manassian!
(Why I'm Still Breathing)
When the cow was dry, she was compliant.
When she calved, she turned vicious
and no fence could hold her,
but she gave milk in abundance,
and Dad refused to sell her.
She chased Mother 'round and 'round the barn
until Mom panicked, climbed the corner logs,
and perched under the roof,
clinging like a cicada shell on a weed-pod.
Beasty pawed and bellowed until Dad came home.
"I could gain on her on the corners,"
Mother said, "because I could turn faster,
but she gained on me on the straightaway."
Plug-ugly tore through the fence,
into the garden, where Mom and I worked.
"Run, Cona Faye, run," my mother shouted.
How did she know? The cow passed Mother
and thundered straight for me. I ran.
At the fence, snorts filled my ears. Hot breath
steamed my back. I saw myself stomped,
pulverized into the dirt. I turned, screaming
at full volume, and flailed my arms
like a windmill in a strong wind.
That old red cow locked her front legs
and skidded like a freight train on full brake.
I seized the moment, and scaled that rail fence.
A precious gift! Joy unimagined fills my heart
She smiles! My heart races, leaping!
And like a butterfly in spring, gliding,
It dips among new blossoms
Like a sweet melody playing softly
in the cool of the evening, I soar!
My baby, my first, like an angel sleeps
Soft, warm and brown
I stare in awe of this most perfect gift from God!
Tiny almond-shaped eyes, sparkle- searching
Nothing as beautiful have I ever seen!
She cries and her teardrops like crystal daggers
Pierce, my joyful heart!
And like a wounded sparrow it plummets
Free-falling, and I am left puzzled...confused
Nervous, I gently hold her close to my breast
I am sure she can feel my heart beating..
Suddenly our faces brush... she turns-
Our eyes lock, and smiles ripple!
My first born--all is well in my world.
Once bloomed a rose so young and fair
With dark brown eyes and long black hair
Beside her be a tall dark tree
Whose branches stretch to smother thee
Too close beside the shadowy bark
That soon begins to leave its mark
She cries for help, but none shall hear
Her thorns too sharp, who’d dare go near?
To save this rose, who’d risk their life?
With naught to gain but pain and strife
Alone, afraid, she lays to rest
Her heart beats low inside her chest
And with the hour growing near
She sheds her final grieving tear
And so the rose soon falls asunder
Her final day, eternal slumber
She lies beside the old dark tree
The only one who mourns for thee
Dancing butterflies and laughter
without a care. A day full of sweet
smelling blossoms fill the air.
Sister's golden hair glistened in the
Summer sun's glow, as Mother blew
colorful bubbles that bounced off
her little nose.
Mother's heart was always full of
love to share and the day of blossoms,
and bubbles will forever in my memories
be kept with loving care.
Precious and few are moments shared
together. This wonderful day of blossoms
and bubbles, in my heart will last forever.
April 6, 2015
My one burning wish -
I want not to fade away
like rotten lace, dumped
onto a trash heap and forgotten.
I want to leave myself behind,
for those who come after
to inhale during breakfast.
Not money, like my mother,
who judged it to be the only thing
of worth she had to leave behind,
as though her love meant nothing,
as though her virtue didn't count.
A nonpareil pattern of motherhood,
of personhood for that matter,
written in permanent script,
propagated in layers of goodness,
flung onto her progeny
with the glue of infinity.
As long as I live, so will she.
I want that,
when it's my turn to go.
The warrior lays her weary head,
With heavy heart she cannot bear,
Burning tears stream down her face,
As whispered memories touch the ear.
Her armour tarnished by remorse,
Her battle-cry a wimpered row,
Her wounds, of which bleed solitude,
Will never know forgiveness now.
The song began two score ago,
When two came knocking at her door,
In need of refuge from the world,
Of that, and love, and little more.
Forced to fight for every smile,
Her only solace found in song,
She longed for love to rescue her,
And plant her where she could belong.
Jealous tongues are seldom kind,
Self-seeking hearts know nought of love,
The caged canary only sings,
When coaxed to praise from up above.
For the steely spine that now I own,
Forever shall I grateful be,
A gift from her, and from her own.
Courage mounted inwardly.
I'll not forget how I have loved thee,
And youthful memories I will prize,
Til on the shore of His forgiveness,
Whereto now, we both shall rise.
Clutched tight to my chest, the doll smiles lifelessly
sending vacant stares down the darkened hall.
A solitary line of pink light sneaks through a crack in the door.
Fighting tears hanging loosely in my eyes, I listen.
“Please tell daddy that I love him and miss him.”
It has been two months since he died. Long, hard months.
“Keep him safe.”
His smell still lingers on his clothes in the closet.
“and bless mommy to be happy…”
How can I be happy, or even smile, when all I want is to be numb?
The tears burn in my eyes, but I can’t cry, or I might never stop.
“so that she will play with me like she used to”
I can scarcely recall the last time I was able to focus; to give her all my attention.
“help her to forgive me,”
Oh sweet baby, it’s I who needs your forgiveness.
“help her to love me again, even though sometimes I’m bad”
Oh God, is that what she thinks!?
“and please help me to find dolly so she won’t be scared tonight”
Ok, focus…just breathe.
“in Jesus name I pray, Amen.”
Clutched tight to my chest, the doll smiles lifelessly
sending vacant stares into the room lit by a solitary pink lamp.
I sneak through the door, with tears rolling down my cheeks,
and enter with a promise, that all her prayers will get answered.
Submission for Prayertime Memories
Hosted by Isaiah Zerbst
She is learning young
Pure genteel pleasures of a garden
Amid the fragrant roses and towering lupines
That give the winter pardon.
Sweet feminine echo of her beautiful mother
She holds up her watering can
a tiny version of the other.
Now she mimics to perfection
The sprinkling of flowers
as she giggles with delight
At birds in secret bowers.
She can't wait for the 'morrow
Her duties to employ
She is mother's little helper
And Daddy's little joy
For Isaiah Zerbst -Gordon Dunlop Leslie Contest
When Dad passed I moved home with Mom,
We were roommates at first;
Shopping, lunching, gardening, it was fun,
There were some signs that began, slowly.
A small forgetfulness,
One day, Mom said I cannot write my name;
So, I did the banking,
Soon I was doing all the groceries.
The housework, the cooking, I did it all,
Mom needed full time care;
She was sick and stayed mostly in her bed,
I became the Mom, the daughter gone.
My own life put on hold,
I was her everything and this adult said;
When all hope was gone,
Oh turn off the life support please, please.
April 21, 2015
Submitted to Screwed III contest, sponsor, Rob Carmack, Seventh Place
For the contest, The True Meaning Of Being An Adult,
Sponsor, FJ Thomas, Honorable Mention
A As always in my darkest hour, she still comes to calm my fears
L Like the flower's scent in the dark of night, she will come to soothe my tears
I I can sense, in the gentle breeze's touch, the softness of her skin
C Could there be found, in a thousand poems, a love so pure as this?
I I know it sounds beyond most realms, and some may call it myth
A Although she's gone, and time has passed, forever does exist
For the contest sponsored by Tammy Reams
Mother's Day Acrostic