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Limerick Romance Poems | Limerick Poems About Romance

These Limerick Romance poems are examples of Limerick poems about Romance. These are the best examples of Limerick Romance poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!


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He Tickled Her Pink

There once was a raven haired Shrink
Who had orange Juice Tequilas to drink

While her scarlet souled Beau
Sucked her tinted red Toe

And she paled when he tickled her Pink.


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Do You

Do you love me?
or love me not?
You told me once,
But i forgot.
So tell me once,
and tell me twice,
and i will tell you,
that i love you.
I do believe,
that God above,
Created you,
for me to love.
He chose you out,
from all the rest,
because he knew,
I'd love you best.
       xxx


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Mile High Consequences

She spots a sniffling hottie by her gate 
They learn their flight will be three hours late
After a few rounds at the pub
They board and join the Mile High Club
Then the poor dame sneezed for a whole week straight 


*For Gwen's contest :)


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Deal Or No Deal

<                             Once was a gal shopped all garage sales
                               Nuts ~ bolts ~ screws ~  all found in one big pail
                               Husband said had nice rack
                               Wife turns ~ gives him.... good smack
                               Loaded - buckshot - and - boy - did - he .... wail 



Written by
Katherine Stella 
9/8/2012                              
                             
Entry For
Skat's
A Poets Garage Sale
GL ALL


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Beach Proposal

We went for a walk on the beach
His hand for my hand did reach
Walking together
It seemed like forever
A marriage proposal he did beseech.

He spoke again said you’re squeezing my hand
As my feet felt like led in the sand
I stopped in my track
Felt my smile crack
Then he showed me the wedding band.

I could no longer contain my feeling
Inside I would have hit the ceiling
Of course I said yes 
To his great request
And now my heart he is stealing.


For contest “Loveland Limerick”  
JT76945
Brian Magness


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SOME KIND OF RED DATE


When Kate arrived in a dipped red frock Her date’s toupee flew off, black from shock; When asked, “you’re really bald?” His face whitened and stalled, “I’m comic you see, one of my props.” A mouse at dinner poked the blondish chick Aghast was she; pink face grew sick. Guy planned a witty threat Stuffed wig on Kate’s cream breast; Then meowed at the rat until it squeaked. Lisa Cooper’s Tickle Me Contest


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Subversive Valentines Day

Once I had a girlfriend and ex-wife.
Two ladies at the same time in life,
Mistake I made this day.
Not proud in anyway.
First mistake, second retake in strife,

Girlfriend I gave flowers for the day.
Ex-wife and I married, oui evay,
Messed up my life again,
Not knowing where I’d been.
Girlfriend forlorn, wrong card I did play.

Ex-wife left me, I got just deserts.
Got what I deserved for all my flirts.
Valentine’s Day, bad karma,
Cupid dealt me, my dharma,
Disengaging me of all subverts.


Written for

Sponsor Francine Roberts 
Contest Name Valentine's Day Limerick 


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Quit Your Growling

<          once there was old woman on the prowl
            found younger man and begun to howl
            under silvery moon
            fead him with baby spoon
            now stomach does goo goo gah gah grawls



Written By Katherine Stella


Entry For Dr. Ram's Cougar Effect Contest 
G.L. All                                                                


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Miracles Happen To and In June

There once was a gal name of June.
Who wanted to kiss and to spoon.
  She made a big splatter
  falling off a tall ladder.
 When she married the man in the moon.

Her wedding of course was in June.
She wanted to marry him soon..
   She started to chatter
   but that didn't matter.
Their life was so much a cartoon.

The man in the moon liked to croon.
He liked to sing songs about June.
   But nothing was sadder
   when he made her madder.
Singing not of "June" but of June.

To get on her good side Old Lune.
Flew June to the moon via balloon.
  But she was much fatter
  and emptied her bladder.
Now he looked like a baboon.
  
To end this wild tale about June.
Know the man in the moon made her swoon
    He heard her feet patter
    when she mixed cake batter.
Turning into butterfly from cocoon.


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Full Circle

Just out of college, we would yearn for a touch
Sleeping together cuddled on the couch
Those were the days!
Of pre-wedding bouquets
Now I am told to go sleep alone on the couch


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Perfume


Your cologne, your pheromone have just blown 
over me.  Now my testosterone 
leaves me dying to do 
all of those things for you 
I do in your erogenous zone.


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Little Jack Horner

Mother Goose had a mighty fine pie
And Jack Horner she couldn’t deny
When he stuck in his thumb
Mother Goose did succumb
So she left Father Goose bye and bye


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Trader Joe

<                           once there was a man named trader Joe
                             could do nothing with hair so let grow
                             under big coonskin hat
                             fleas tick and his pet rat
                             mercantile's just say Oh Hell No


                            once there was saloon name lucky spur
                            where traders brought in their hunted furs
                            in walks old trader Joe
                            miss Molly said let's go
                            now both itch scratch from leftover burrs


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my heart I gave once

once I gave my heart 
mesmerized by the start 
his eyes so sapphire blue 

I was not ready for this
my thoughts went blank 
literally speechless

had I known the tears I would be left with
I do not believe I would have let love in
this Man , he knew he captivated women 

Always me going for what I can not have 
then in return it is given , leaving me confused
the one I was seeking for sure would never commit 

Commit he did , even in front of a Rabbi 
saying only once, 1 time will I.
with all conviction I believed his lie 

I remember the Fall day he left without words spoken 
the leaves were dancing through the wind 
as if they were trying to tell me something 

the rain cried tears for me that night 
I took his sword collection down from the wall
thinking in true love I will never find again

to die a graceful poetic death with his sword
I awoke with a hangover the next day 
my heart broken  my heart ignored


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The Last Of The Romantics

She was the only love he'd ever known

   For the cheap wedding ring he would atone

      She pined for a bigger "ice"

         A five carat stone would be nice

            The jerk bought her a one ton graveyard stone

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved


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February's Funny Bone

There once was a joker called Cupid; 
The matches he made often stupid,
But he fired from his bow
At the folks down below -
His tricks got him oft prosecuted.

Jack Horne for Linda-Marie’s February Funny Bone contest


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Homecoming

Favorite green silk robe Lying in wait for him to come home Dinner is ready The door opens steady Happy he’s finally home * Racing from the car to the door As soon as my shoes hit the floor My heart is capsizing Just now realizing She’s more beautiful than ever before * We’ve finally found our way home We’ll never again be alone Embracing at last Hearts racing fast Every emotion within a single moan
A collaborative limerick by Rachel Egona and Julian Egona


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Dirty limerick: old man,part 2

Preparing his conference speech
Old man ended up on nude beach
By virtue or vise
He stuck his device
In each blowhole he could reach


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Explosions Galore

When February first came around.
The month in which lovers abound.
    I made a hot date,
    but as was my fate.
Had eaten beans making gaseous sound!

For Brian Strands contest


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Rhyme to recall recapture of romance

Writing relative rhymed rhymes
Rhyming with revival rhythmically rhythm
Is not revue but reviewing my role
To resurrect as requested to revive back romance.
When rhyming my rhymes I can revolve revolutionary robust
Rocking like rocky rocks rolling to the right rendezvous,
but today I recite repose as if I repent,
but rely it you will relish,
because its a rhyme to recall recapture of romance in relationships.

I wrote it to rake up real reign
When raspberries were rasped,
Rationing reverie,
Raucously reading romantic readings regularly.
Becoming a receiver reckon receiving reciprocally gifts,
but this is the recital to recapture  romance to recur.

Read this rhyme to refill,refine,reform and refresh romance.
Regain rarefied of relish rained rich rain
Raining rainy with ravishing red roses reddening a red ring around you.
Relieving yourself by reiterating 'I love you Mrs Right',
and wait for the rejoicing remarkably respond to be relayed
'I love you too Mr Right'.
The respond  that revealed the resourcefully resource for resurrecting.
I rouse you because I'm roused;
Be a roman and go to Rome
To see real romance,
and you will romp of being romantic,
and really its realistically real


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Cupids killer

I left myself open to you like a 24 hour store and you stole from it all that which I value and hold true. You have left my shelves barren…I don’t fully understand it? My heart has been robbed by someone I thought wanted me too, yet only to find that she did not ever love me…I was just being used. As my heart bleed out on a back street alleyway in some forgotten part of a city on the edge of rebirth. I cried dear Lord, oh dear Lord…I have surrendered my love to a defiler of good things. Broken like a priceless vase that can never be replaced, these are the words of a man who’s heart now beats off pace. How could someone be so cruel? I stand hear on the edge of the top of this building, looking into an abyss devoid of my soul and trust of another…seeking only to gain solace in death, from a love misplace in the hands of a cupid killer who was incapable of receiving love.


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Her eyes

Her Eyes
(Based on Photo no. --- ps__JT76945.jpg)

Your lovely brown eyes,
In love of which one dies,
They have got something tempting,
And I may be attempting,
From my dream, to rise…

Your sweet black dress,
Makes me crazy more or less,
I can make you out in queue,
And I can’t live without you,
But often, who are you is what I try to guess…

I am butter and you are my knife,
You are my dearest life,
You are my life’s cause,
But due to my memory- loss,
I just wonder; “You are my wife?”

                                                                                                        -Anjali Mishra


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The Dish and the Spoon

There once was a girl we called Spoon
Because of her round bottomed moon
When Hey Diddle Diddle
Tried to play with her middle
The Spoon said I don’t play that tune

Another gal we called the Dish
The object of my nightly wish
She was every man’s dream
But played for the wrong team
She walked with a sway not a swish

Then on a bright June afternoon
Their eyes met and they both did swoon
Then you know the rest
Despite our protest
The Dish ran away with the Spoon


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Heart Broken

I once had a heart that was broken
When unmentional things were spoken
Now I'm out on the town
Just cattin' around
With a life that's really smokin'

mdailey   2/2/12

1st place finish in contest


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I Fell In Love

I fell in love; my heart goes thump, thump.
You, dear one, a beautiful tree stump.
Creases that shine so clear.
Your presence, calls me near.
Say you love me, while I have this bump.

My heart craves in desire, for your rings.
Fire burns inside, as the minstrel sings.
Your caress sometimes rough,
I am your man; I am tough.
Say you will be mine, please, my lust springs.

My darling, thus true, you are my stump.
Adore resting on you, on my rump.
I ache for answer, soon.
Before the budding moon,
My sweet love, do not make me a chump.



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Balked

Our young beau just could not have known
That the lady, when young, had been shown
How to keep her demeanor
Whilst walking her wiener.
Thus  balked, he walked home on his own.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Inspired by John Wulf's "Puppy Love"


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Little Robin Redbreast

There once was this redbreasted Robin
Who there on the beach was just sobbin’
That sunburn must hurt
It glowed right through her shirt
The view set my parts just a throbbin’