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Limerick Romance Poems | Limerick Poems About Romance

These Limerick Romance poems are examples of Limerick poems about Romance. These are the best examples of Limerick Romance poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!

Copyright © JSLambert Mister ROBOTO

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He Tickled Her Pink

There once was a raven haired Shrink
Who had orange Juice Tequilas to drink

While her scarlet souled Beau
Sucked her tinted red Toe

And she paled when he tickled her Pink.

Copyright © Terry O'Leary

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Deal Or No Deal

<                             Once was a gal shopped all garage sales
                               Nuts ~ bolts ~ screws ~  all found in one big pail
                               Husband said had nice rack
                               Wife turns ~ gives him.... good smack
                               Loaded - buckshot - and - boy - did - he .... wail 

Written by
Katherine Stella 
Entry For
A Poets Garage Sale

Copyright © Katherine Stella

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Beach Proposal

We went for a walk on the beach
His hand for my hand did reach
Walking together
It seemed like forever
A marriage proposal he did beseech.

He spoke again said you’re squeezing my hand
As my feet felt like led in the sand
I stopped in my track
Felt my smile crack
Then he showed me the wedding band.

I could no longer contain my feeling
Inside I would have hit the ceiling
Of course I said yes 
To his great request
And now my heart he is stealing.

For contest “Loveland Limerick”  
Brian Magness

Copyright © Brian Magness

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Mile High Consequences

She spots a sniffling hottie by her gate 
They learn their flight will be three hours late
After a few rounds at the pub
They board and join the Mile High Club
Then the poor dame sneezed for a whole week straight 

*For Gwen's contest :)

Copyright © Natalie The Rogue Rhymer

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Miracles Happen To and In June

There once was a gal name of June.
Who wanted to kiss and to spoon.
  She made a big splatter
  falling off a tall ladder.
 When she married the man in the moon.

Her wedding of course was in June.
She wanted to marry him soon..
   She started to chatter
   but that didn't matter.
Their life was so much a cartoon.

The man in the moon liked to croon.
He liked to sing songs about June.
   But nothing was sadder
   when he made her madder.
Singing not of "June" but of June.

To get on her good side Old Lune.
Flew June to the moon via balloon.
  But she was much fatter
  and emptied her bladder.
Now he looked like a baboon.
To end this wild tale about June.
Know the man in the moon made her swoon
    He heard her feet patter
    when she mixed cake batter.
Turning into butterfly from cocoon.

Copyright © Marty Owens

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Sky as infinite as deep thoughts,
foaming sea emitting sparkles,
glances brightened by romance,
a sweet urge to dance...
enjoying the peace of late hours.

Inspired by Linda-Marie's photo ps.JT76945.jpg
written by Andrew Crisci

Copyright © Andrew Crisci

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Subversive Valentines Day

Once I had a girlfriend and ex-wife.
Two ladies at the same time in life,
Mistake I made this day.
Not proud in anyway.
First mistake, second retake in strife,

Girlfriend I gave flowers for the day.
Ex-wife and I married, oui evay,
Messed up my life again,
Not knowing where I’d been.
Girlfriend forlorn, wrong card I did play.

Ex-wife left me, I got just deserts.
Got what I deserved for all my flirts.
Valentine’s Day, bad karma,
Cupid dealt me, my dharma,
Disengaging me of all subverts.

Written for

Sponsor Francine Roberts 
Contest Name Valentine's Day Limerick 

Copyright © cecil hickman

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Two lovers with a second chance
At life enriched with sweet romance,
Repeat their wedding vows
In manner God allows,
With tasteful, simple elegance.

Loved ones and good friends gather near
Sharing in the joy and cheer.
Italian day is fair,
Blessing the happy pair,
Predicting future bright and clear.

May their good fortune never wane,
And sunshine over-power the rain.
Their love will be their wealth
In sickness and in health.
May their deep love always remain.

By: Joyce Johnson

For Linda-Marie's Loveland Limerick contest  won a 5th in this
from photo j 17 6858

Copyright © Joyce Johnson

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Nefarious Romance

Her name was Liza Jane Macnelly,
She loved Anchovies and jelly,
“She’s a wonderful girl,
said her boyfriend Earl,
But her breath is a little bit smelly”.

His name was Billy Joe Trevy,
He had no A/C in his Chevy,
“It’s  such a nefarious pain” ,
said his girlfriend Jane, 
Because he perspires a bit too heavy”.

But they both loved each other so well,
That they accepted each other’s smell,
The moral of the story here?
There is none, I fear.
They just simply …smell like hell !

Copyright © Robert A. Dufresne

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Full Circle

Just out of college, we would yearn for a touch
Sleeping together cuddled on the couch
Those were the days!
Of pre-wedding bouquets
Now I am told to go sleep alone on the couch

Copyright © Nitesh Aggarwal

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my heart I gave once

once I gave my heart 
mesmerized by the start 
his eyes so sapphire blue 

I was not ready for this
my thoughts went blank 
literally speechless

had I known the tears I would be left with
I do not believe I would have let love in
this Man , he knew he captivated women 

Always me going for what I can not have 
then in return it is given , leaving me confused
the one I was seeking for sure would never commit 

Commit he did , even in front of a Rabbi 
saying only once, 1 time will I.
with all conviction I believed his lie 

I remember the Fall day he left without words spoken 
the leaves were dancing through the wind 
as if they were trying to tell me something 

the rain cried tears for me that night 
I took his sword collection down from the wall
thinking in true love I will never find again

to die a graceful poetic death with his sword
I awoke with a hangover the next day 
my heart broken  my heart ignored

Copyright © Shanity Rain

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Trader Joe

<                           once there was a man named trader Joe
                             could do nothing with hair so let grow
                             under big coonskin hat
                             fleas tick and his pet rat
                             mercantile's just say Oh Hell No

                            once there was saloon name lucky spur
                            where traders brought in their hunted furs
                            in walks old trader Joe
                            miss Molly said let's go
                            now both itch scratch from leftover burrs

Copyright © Katherine Stella

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Quit Your Growling

<          once there was old woman on the prowl
            found younger man and begun to howl
            under silvery moon
            fead him with baby spoon
            now stomach does goo goo gah gah grawls

Written By Katherine Stella

Entry For Dr. Ram's Cougar Effect Contest 
G.L. All                                                                

Copyright © Katherine Stella

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Your cologne, your pheromone have just blown 
over me.  Now my testosterone 
leaves me dying to do 
all of those things for you 
I do in your erogenous zone.

Copyright © John Smith

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Little Jack Horner

Mother Goose had a mighty fine pie
And Jack Horner she couldn’t deny
When he stuck in his thumb
Mother Goose did succumb
So she left Father Goose bye and bye

Copyright © mike dailey

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Once there was a man called periasamy
directed a motion picture “konchamkamy”
fiction, the genre he despise
romance, he loves with kisses
bloody worried of getting certified “adults only”.

****”konchamkamy” means “show little”


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Bill And Kate

Bill and Kate are wed and I wish them well
They are so in love far as I can tell
But they've got to learn so much
To evince that royal touch
So not from Queen Liz to catch 'oly 'ell

Wave as if screwing light bulbs in sockets
Billy keep your hands out of your pockets
Wear perpetual glowers
Never serve Liz Whiskey Sours
Zazas she likes for happy hour dockets

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Copyright © Robert L. Hinshaw

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Favorite green silk robe Lying in wait for him to come home Dinner is ready The door opens steady Happy he’s finally home * Racing from the car to the door As soon as my shoes hit the floor My heart is capsizing Just now realizing She’s more beautiful than ever before * We’ve finally found our way home We’ll never again be alone Embracing at last Hearts racing fast Every emotion within a single moan
A collaborative limerick by Rachel Egona and Julian Egona

Copyright © Julian Egona

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Romance in Durango

 I met her south of the border in Durango,
 She was hot and boy could she fandango!
   She said at a glance
  "Señor like to dance?"
 No I replied......but I would love to tango!

Copyright © Keith Trestrail

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Dirty limerick: old man,part 2

Preparing his conference speech
Old man ended up on nude beach
By virtue or vise
He stuck his device
In each blowhole he could reach

Copyright © Gorlum Gorlum

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The Last Of The Romantics

She was the only love he'd ever known

   For the cheap wedding ring he would atone

      She pined for a bigger "ice"

         A five carat stone would be nice

            The jerk bought her a one ton graveyard stone

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Copyright © Robert L. Hinshaw

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Explosions Galore

When February first came around.
The month in which lovers abound.
    I made a hot date,
    but as was my fate.
Had eaten beans making gaseous sound!

For Brian Strands contest

Copyright © Marty Owens

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Hey James, what do you see

On holiday my eyes observed So tanned and beautifully curved Her eyes turned to me Hey! James what do you see? Patience, you'll receive your deserves .

Copyright © James Fraser

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Cupids killer

I left myself open to you like a 24 hour store and you stole from it all that which I value and hold true. You have left my shelves barren…I don’t fully understand it? My heart has been robbed by someone I thought wanted me too, yet only to find that she did not ever love me…I was just being used. As my heart bleed out on a back street alleyway in some forgotten part of a city on the edge of rebirth. I cried dear Lord, oh dear Lord…I have surrendered my love to a defiler of good things. Broken like a priceless vase that can never be replaced, these are the words of a man who’s heart now beats off pace. How could someone be so cruel? I stand hear on the edge of the top of this building, looking into an abyss devoid of my soul and trust of another…seeking only to gain solace in death, from a love misplace in the hands of a cupid killer who was incapable of receiving love.

Copyright © Jay Anderson-Taylor

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Rhyme to recall recapture of romance

Writing relative rhymed rhymes
Rhyming with revival rhythmically rhythm
Is not revue but reviewing my role
To resurrect as requested to revive back romance.
When rhyming my rhymes I can revolve revolutionary robust
Rocking like rocky rocks rolling to the right rendezvous,
but today I recite repose as if I repent,
but rely it you will relish,
because its a rhyme to recall recapture of romance in relationships.

I wrote it to rake up real reign
When raspberries were rasped,
Rationing reverie,
Raucously reading romantic readings regularly.
Becoming a receiver reckon receiving reciprocally gifts,
but this is the recital to recapture  romance to recur.

Read this rhyme to refill,refine,reform and refresh romance.
Regain rarefied of relish rained rich rain
Raining rainy with ravishing red roses reddening a red ring around you.
Relieving yourself by reiterating 'I love you Mrs Right',
and wait for the rejoicing remarkably respond to be relayed
'I love you too Mr Right'.
The respond  that revealed the resourcefully resource for resurrecting.
I rouse you because I'm roused;
Be a roman and go to Rome
To see real romance,
and you will romp of being romantic,
and really its realistically real

Copyright © Tsotetsi Thabiso Edward

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Loveland Romance

There was once a blonde from Jersey
Looked like a flamboyant gypsy
Married an Italian
A pure bred stallion
Now the couple looked most sexy

They honeymooned in Italy
Walked the pristine beach daily
With flowers in hand
This way they had planned
To enjoy this short life gaily

By- Tahera Mannan

Copyright © Tahera Mannan

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February's Funny Bone

There once was a joker called Cupid; 
The matches he made often stupid,
But he fired from his bow
At the folks down below -
His tricks got him oft prosecuted.

Jack Horne for Linda-Marie’s February Funny Bone contest

Copyright © jack horne

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Romance Foiled

To Valentines Day I am true
The joy of a score!
Sex is a pleasant
Heart holiday present
Now ruined since I’ve caught the flu

Copyright © Duke Beaufort

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Cougar and Cub

There once was this gal – much older
And I being young but bolder
Took hold of her hand
Said I am your man
But she gave me the old cold shoulder

Now I – being not a quitter
Thought how am I going to get her
I must make her mine
The very next time
My parents get a baby sitter

Written - 	6/19/11 by mdailey
For Dr. Mehta's contest - Cougar Effect

Copyright © mike dailey