I hear you mom is a hooker
She used to be a good looker
The booze she did find
It was real unkind
Must have got out of the cooker
Hiding in mummy's tummy, kicking happily away
I'm kissing you warmly, clapping and singing in play
They say in a few weeks
I'll be able to kiss your new cheeks
I can't wait for the morning I'll lift you in a sway
Johnnie Kenner was sitting on the pot.
He was constipated and getting very hot.
Johnnie got frustrated and began to yell and shout.
His mom gave him some laxative to force the feces out.
All heck broke loose and Johnnie overflowed the pot.
If for one week each man could be mother,
then men might think as mothers think.
Could you stand the life
Say of being your own wife?
Dirty dishes do not belong in the sink.
For one week, all men should run the home;
trade places with the cook for a real trip.
Think of planning every meal,
mashing potatoes with no peel.
Did you fix the faucet that’s started to drip?
You’d change the beds and clean the clothes,
of rust, blood, and ink there’d be no trace.
Be a mind reader at times
solving children’s crimes,
you’d show your children God and his grace.
Part magician, part clown, part traffic cop,
you’d give birth, nurse all who need care.
Respond to each cry,
answer every “why?”,
know how to get bubble gum out of hair.
Of the women I’ve known who’ve been mothers
by men they can’t be supplanted.
Trade-offs are fun to ponder
and can make us wonder
why on earth men take mothers for granted.
I start my life out everyday ,Often in the same ol' way,
I eat ,
I bathe and crawl back n forth, Some days , I ride my rocking horse,
But nothing prepares for mt goal,
Oh my !! Do hurry I want to roll,
My wheels are the whitest , I have seen,
My spokes are the shinest , Oh how they beam,
I do love summer time,,
My shocks are the raddest, They bounce and they bounce,
My ride is way to cool,
I can't wait till ,I get to school,
I have to check my get and go,
Sometimes, Mom is kinda slow,
I coo and I coddle so she gets some gas,
I really want to get there fast,
My diaper bag packed and ready to go ,
We are the hippest , I want to roll,
We stroll right by the other rides, Mine is the Coolest mom confides,
I bounce and I giggle all the way to play !
OH My , what a wonderful day,!
Limerick: Once a Mom Tigress spurned her lame-born cub
for Commandant Cousteau’s son
Once a Mom Tigress spurned her lame-born cub
Wild Life Champ admitted cub to his club
Took cub under his wing
Till she could wildly spring:
Club members now learn to swing the knobbed club.
© T. Wignesan – Paris, 2013