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Life Hate Poems | Life Poems About Hate

These Life Hate poems are examples of Life poems about Hate. These are the best examples of Life Hate poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Couplet | |

Created By Choices

Something evil this way comes
Sure as the rising of the Son

A single heart left to bleed
A lost soul with a dying need

When love proves it doesn’t care
In creeps darkness and despair

Angry voices from deep with-in
Scream I’m a fool once again

I now make my soul like a cave
It’s the darkness that I now crave

Around my heart I shall build a moat
With blood sacrifices unto the goat

Deep in darkness as a soul can be
Father of darkness come feed on me

She destroyed the love in my soul
I do pray that hate fills up the hole

Troubled souls with hallow voices
In this life we all make choices

My choices have left me degraded
I now hate the person I created

Into darkness away from the Son
Something evil this way comes


Yea, I posted this for Deborah's contest.
Believe it or not this is who i used to
be. Poetry is a truly amazing tool when
it comes to change, it transformed this
into the man I am. All I can say about
that, "Praise be the Power of God".


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Free verse | |

It Can't Be Real

A truth in rage of insult furrows my mind
For it is only an offense given to me by myself
In the mouths of others far innocent than I
I feel the tears trickle down my cheeks
For I have surfaced into an ugly mistake
I am always inadequate in this brain
I try to shine like the advice of grace given
But confidence rarely rears its head my way
There’s a sort of shade blocking its way
A shade that darkens everyday

That very shade led me to believe my feelings are wrong
That I will never belong so long as they are not controlled
I must be careful—for the lines of love and lust run cold
I hate myself truly this night
And no one but myself will give me the right
The very right to degrade my every being
Because you are not seeing what I am seeing

There is no point
My lines run cold
Can I be so bold as to say
I still love with a pang of indistinguishable doubt 
All feelings enter in
As my truth blurs and checks out

Your words pierce me so deep
I cannot describe the pain I feel
God it hurts so bad
It can’t be real

Much like the love I have come to embrace
The very love that links to your face
Tears don’t give it justice

It can’t be real
Much like the love I will never face


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Your King

A burst of white light gamma rays, overbearing a flash of brilliance burns through to my soul everything is like hell the world starts to melt in the blink of an eye just the cold blackness of night I don't care if I am not again what I once was, for at this moment I am greater now than ever before I took the path between teetering, tight roping walking right up to my right divined in my unholy state I thought I told you I am your king still you sit there, hesitating I know you hate me what does that mean? I hate just about everything still I'm chosen I did not wish before now bow down to me refuse me no more for I shall always be your demon until you accept me as your King. I don't even know you though you say we used to be best of friends, you and me the day you ditched me I remember now exactly how it played out back when we were just tiny things even back then I still was King you thought me stupid just a ruse I would laugh inside, you see? not one of you single, mean people ever even knew me in a world, mostly seen to me that is why only I can be your true King and bring forth a new source of light everlasting. As two worlds collide slowly aligned one wrapped in shadows one bathed in white evils swirling in the clouds above I'll always be the king you love to hate or despise as in your blood I thought I told you, I am the one I am the way, the way out shall be shown breathe in my spirit as it carries you away breathe in my faith it shall carry your empty space and deposit you gently on a cloud just enough higher than you've ever dreamed of for I am king now, and your in my hell your in my imagination, I'll just never tell you'll feel as though dreaming, you'll feel now if you try and see you were always found the most shared in the light cast upon me the last bright star in heaven. Denounce my name, if you may One year later, still not afraid A black sheep, a darkened spade That's just life, I'm not right I'm in the wrong, follow along Like a piper, I'll pitch a song Mesmerized, the weak wills sing I thought he told you, he's still our king.


Details | Rhyme | |

ANGELus

Angelus wasn't anyone special. Some might say that he was a loser.

He did more than his share of chasing women 

and townsfolk say that he was very much the boozer,

but beneath all of his irresponsibility stood a champion the purest of heart.

The Good was always within him. It just never seemed to get a good start.

Angelus was abused by his father. Conflicts arose between the two quite often.

His father saw his son as a family disgrace 

and wouldn't hesitate to get the whip and beat him.

"Why does my father hate me so? Families should love you no matter what.

How can I give my family what they desire 

when it's simply something that I just haven't got?"

Thoughts like this would haunt Angelus daily, leaving him in a very confused place to be.

"I love them! I hate them!" Angelus would cry. "I hate them for not loving me."

One evening he was drowning his sorrows. Suddenly this vision of loveliness appeared.

The vixen Darla then said as she ran her fingers through his hair,

"Such beautiful eyes should not be so filled with tears.

I too never knew the love of a family. I roamed this world living my life as a whore,

searching for the love of family in the arms of strangers 

who cared less after they had used me once more.

I can only imagine the pain that you suffer. 

I never knew my family and perhaps it's just as well,

because seeing you here now with your family and a family that doesn't love you

is so obviously a more painful and tormenting hell.

You've two choices before you Angelus my sweet.

End your life now and free yourself from this torment

or spend forever with me and together we'll seek life's bittersweet but eternal enjoyment.

If death isn't your choice then the answer is clear.

Say the words and I'll deliver you from all of this.

Close your eyes, say the words, you have nothing to fear.

Let me give you my eternal kiss."

He gazed upon her and thought to himself, "This one truly must be my salvation."

"I choose you," he then said as he closed his eyes

and so began Angelus's damnation.

She sunk her fangs deep in his throat and fed on his blood.

All of his Good, all of his Soul all disappear.

Angelus was reborn the most evil of evil.

He was the vampire all vampires would fear.

Angelus's Revenge >
http://www.poetrysoup.com/poems_poets/poem_detail.aspx?ID=190796


Details | Lyric | |

Is this who you are

walked away from the sun,
and into my life,
im sick and tired of all you put me through,
im sick and tired of your childish games,
and im tired of your foolish lies,
when you talk,
i bleed inside,
i hate your disgusting thoughts,
in you stupidity flows,
your the devil,
and me your victim of evil plans,
i hate you,
why cant you understand,
you put me through hell,
everytime i find happiness,
your the devil,
and me a poor soldier,
wrap all the papers,
and put it in a folder,
case closed!


Details | I do not know? | |

Love is the Key ---to Victory ---Victory in Jesus

In Life 
Each person goes through
many different types of tribulations
Troubles hits homes
Even Nations

You can hate evil
That's spun
But We Believers know
Love Is the Key to Victory


You gotta Love People
Even those whom do you wrong
For You belong to Jesus
As Jesus said.. with His Last Breath
"Father... Forgive them"
"For they do not know what they do"

As Our Father states
Love one another Tenderheartedly
Never let go of Love inside of thee
You otta Love People~Far and wide
Show Love you have inside

Here on this Earth
Show them all How much they are Worth
All People are Worth Everything
God's Only Begotten Son.. Our King
Showed God's Divine Love for all
He died on the Cross and Risen
Just for You and Me~All People

All Souls.. chance to be whole
Even Souls whom portray evil in days
What profit do you receive
If You only Love those.. whom Love thee?

Love All People
There is many forms of Love
God gives Blessings in Life
Precious is Souls
Whom Love's Shares-shows
God's Glorious Light
Glowing through day and night
Shining.. Bringing others to Christ

All People are Beautiful
Even those who.. don't know what they do
Forgive all those whom do.. or done you wrong
For Knowing You belong to Our Father's Son
Shine Your Light.. bright.. Bright.. BRIGHT!

There's many Relationships
can come about
Love is in Air.. no doubt
God's Blessings are Every Where
Love between You and Me~all People

You can hate this world
But You otta Love Souls
For without Love for one another
then there is No point for each other

Love makes world go around
Love is Greatest Gift can be found
Love between.. You and Me~all People
Most Love of All..  Love Pure and True
Love that God.. Almighty 
has given to me.. and You
And All People to receive 
DIVINE LOVE
All of Us--Come to Jesus.. Believe

Believe in Love
Love is The Greatest thing
Love makes Life worth Living
Love gives.. so Others can Live

As God so Loved the World
He gave... His Divine Love of all
Just for You and Me~All People
Save Souls.. Of God's Children
Always Love Tenderheartedly 
For All.. People in World

How do You portray Your Love?
To those whom Love You
Or to All People.. in World

Or to none.. and just let World go by
awaiting for moment.. Christ
Come Shine Your Love.. Light Through
Jesus died and Risen for Me & You~All People

Love One Another.. as Christ Loves Us
Forgive Each other.. As Our Father forgives Us
Save Souls.. As God Saved Us


Details | Free verse | |

Mystery guy

          Dreams and memories of what could have been,The past means nothing to me 
and then everything at the same time. 

It's made me who I am, and i'm glad I know but if I could change the past would I be so 
quick to do so? I want to have it all but the future never whispers not even a little bit 
I want to know it's secrets.

 I am left in the dark about what and where I will be the future no tears that promise 
pain so I don't know if I will get hurt. 

It's just that I can't help thinking about you and how different I would probably be if 
you knew that one secret that I held so close to me for so long that when it was time it 
was too late.

 I may spend eternity looking for someone exactly like you, it's because my conscience 
will never let me forget how good a person you were.
 
I was so deep into you that i'd lose myself in the moment and I have never felt that way 
before and I don't know if I will feel it again. 

Just waking every morning knowing that I would get to see you again, Oh it 
was such a feeling and now I can't even remember how it felt.

 Searching for that guy again with my whole heart and my whole soul... even if it turned 
out bitter I just wish I could know.

 I hate living in regret, I hate living in my head.

 It's filled with empty promises and dreams that are so far away I can't even feel them.

 I want to touch, this time i'm not afraid if only you could appear one day then maybe I 
would get my second chance.

 Reality is so much better than anything I could pretend 
so when the time comes I will jump into that mystery guys arms and fly free for that 
moment.


Details | Free verse | |

A Letter of Love/Hate

This hurts too much,
Even though at times
Its the best thing ever.
However,  the pain I feel right now 
Is destroying all that I am. 
I feel worthless and dumb. 
Vunerable and used. 
I also feel loved and special. 
Beautiful and wanted. 
These feeling are so extreme in every which way possible.
I love how I feel when with you
I hate how I feel guilty when we part
I love looking in your eyes
I hate when mine cry
Your fingers along my face also touches her
Those lips that drive me crazy
Are sleeping against her neck tonight
I love who I am around you
I hate what I have turned into
I love the way you make me feel
I hate that she must feel that as well
No matter how good it feels
This pain is too much to bear
I love you
I truely truely do
But the hurt is not worth
The random few moments of bliss.
Goodbye, my love-hate lover
Goodbye





**Note**
This is a letter/poem I wrote for someone special. But it moves me so much every time i 
read it, I thought maybe someone else would enjoy reading it as well. 'To write is to share 
with the world, how we all feel but never speak of'     Lisa


Details | I do not know? | |

Why

As I remain here where I lie,
I keep asking that I will quickly die.
 
I hate this stupid self-centered life,
where all people are filled with hate & strife.

As my mom feels so wonderful from popping pills, 
I'm stuck here with the worst gut-wrenching feeling that kills.

I'm sick of my life being filled with tears, cutting, & sadness.
Why can't we just end all the madness?

Why can't people have a life where no tears are seen, only laughs, smiles, & happiness.
And no one could intervene?


Details | Free verse | |

Untwisted

Sometimes the memories won’t fade 
         All the places we have seen
         All the prices we have paid 
The memories of the happy as well as the sad 
            The people we’ve lost
           The friends that we had 
Some memories just seem like a ghost 
I always lost everyone that I loved the most 
The wind would just carry them away 
             Along with my tears 
            And my ability to pray
    I wonder how far is heaven from here?
              How many more heartaches 
                 How many more tears 
              I wonder how far it is away
Because I have so many things that I wish to say 
To all the people that I loved and I lost 
             I’m not even tripping 
             My heart paid the cost 
The reaper rode the river in a bikers disguise 
I’ll never forget the fear in my mother’s eyes 
    As he drug her under and then let her go 
Through my four year old veins hate started to grow 
My eyes were blind my ears were deaf 
After that I forgot  
           There was anything left  
Karma is like poker for it is bound to luck 
When I was just a boy 
God through me under the truck 
Of all the things in life we feel 
   We are all bound to God’s will 
Passion is a doorway between love and hate 
    God is the dealer in the game of fate 
              Our place is not to question why 
                       For if we do our faith will die 
            The deeper we hate the deeper we love 
            I was gifted wisdom by the Lord above 
                    Every gift comes at a price 
A world of experience behind my advice 
     Every smile holds a lifetime of pain 
Nothing that happens should happen in vein 
                         It is our choice that which we do 
 Know in your heart these words are true 
The harder we fall the further we climb 
             No ones life is totally sublime 
Illusion after illusion will be offered to you 
                 But only the living word is true 
The living word that beats in your heart 
Will keep you safe as the world falls apart 
Through the pain of a boy watching his mother die 
It’s never to late to kiss the sky
A man of faith who could never give up 
Please come break my bread and share in my cup 
By the time our journey is through 
                      I’ll share all I am with you 
          Hopefully somewhere in my words you’ll see 
              ---Untwisted is truly the way to be---



Details | I do not know? | |

No Choice!

I hate it when I'm
       told to do
This damn thing
       or that.

And I hate it
When I don't do it
And am made to
      feel a rat!

So what is it that
      I hate much more
To do or not to do?

The former is within myself
      The latter within me, too!


Details | Free verse | |

David

David, you mean the very world to me and more
Can you forgive me?
You brighten my days when I am low and dead
And you listen—you always are there to listen
Bearing all things, you let me cry on your shoulder
You comforted me when I was scared to death
Of the demons…always watching…you were there
Watching over me, scaring them away from me
You save me by being alive and who you are, David
Without you, I would fall apart and shrivel into shame
Because there are few that listen—few that listen
You draw the poisons of my pain clear out
And you let them sink into your own skin
You swallowed my poison instead of spitting it out
I let you drown, David—forgive me…I let you drown
I’m selfish and rude, and I always ignore you
And for ever doing that, I hate myself
Seeing you in your last moments…woke me up
I’ve been a selfish bastard and I hate me
For never giving you enough love

David you are everything to us all and more
Do you hear me?
You are so uplifting to all of those around you 
You are selfless—so incredibly selfless
And in the silence you lifted me high with praise
Because I knew you would always be the one to give it
Never was there a day that you didn’t believe in me
Even when in darkness have I buried you in all matters of sin
Your light blinds the demonic rust...your light always shining
Never leaving me in the dust but never expecting the same back
And I never saved you! From all the loneliness
I never thought of you! I was so selfish
I will never let you go again—I will fight for your glory
You are amazing in every way
Far braver and brighter than I have ever dreamed to be
I let you down this time, David…I cried for your life
But now I ask for your forgiveness
Seeing you being taken away…crushed me to the marrow
I’ve never hated myself more than tonight
But I will never, ever say goodbye

*for my little brother, David William Breidenthal - I would love for you guys to read some of his poetry. He is a brilliant kid. And he’s been having some tough times. Thanks. *


Details | Free verse | |

I hate you

I hate you

I hate that look in your eyes
That makes me despise 
Myself for wanting you

I hate you

I hate your smile and the way that your tease
Plays on my need to please
Every inch of you

I hate you

I hate that you withhold your affection
And in that I find protection
Guarding myself from you

I hate you

I hate the feel of your touch
That I covet so much
I think of nothing but you

I hate you

I hate that you’re there every day
That I wait for your ‘Hey!’
Needing to be near you

Mostly though

I hate me

I hate that I can’t keep away from you
And that the selfishness in you
Shows only the flaws in me


Details | Free verse | |

Love and Hatred

Twin brothers born of humanity 
Raised in the heart land
Fed by circumstances
Shaped by choice
Same freedom
Different destinies 

I saw Love grow with limbs
Stretching wide to pull everything
To himself even hatred
And i saw hatred grow with craws
Hiding them in his bosom
Till they grow longer and stronger

I thought this Love kid was too touchy 
And i treasured Hatred he was for special occasions 
Defending my weaknesses and flaws 
Love was ridiculing my my all efforts
He was becoming extravagant, giving this giving that
Not like Hatred a sweet heart who measured 
According to what he treasured 

Years have gone by and 
Love has prospered with many friends
Many people giving back to him
Yet hatred brought out his claws,
His fangs came out
And he grew three horns

One of rejection
another for despair
And bigger one with this word engraved 'loser'
I watched these twins
Walk different directions like light and darkness
Their waring grand fathers

I walked two their birthday parties
Few turned up, gave him crowns and called him Dad
For hatred the party was noisy
Many gathered worshiped him 
In fear of the horns
Love commanded his servants to dress all that came
with compassion, faithfulness, and honor
Hatred commanded his subjects
To kill every one that came for the party
Many died few survived


Details | Rhyme | |

LOVES MY TRAGEDIES

It never takes much for me to fall in love,
but i love, love for all the reasons I hate love,
I love, love because love is what holds me through the night,
but that same love may hit me in a fight,
I love, love because love is my protection,
but that same love may hurt me from rejection,
I love, love cause no two loves are the same,
but falling in love is like continuing a game, and i just don't wanna play anymore,
I want a love that will love me and except me,
Don't try and change me,
but that is just the type of love that will never find me,
so instead of hating love, I fear love,
I fear love more then I love, love,
I have never feared expressing my love,
but I fear falling in love too deeply cause I know that is just the type of love that will 
hurt me, 
I have falling in love so many times,
it always seems like a race against  time,
love never stays with me,  it always leaves me,
it always finds a way to hurt me,
whether it's taking a boy from me, or taking away someone in my family,
loves my tragedies,
but without love leads me to sanity,
I hate the feeling of being alone because I spent my whole life alone,
 I'v done everything in my life on my own,
I don't think I deserve to be alone but I fear what love may one day do to me,
because love I know will one day hit me,
just like daddy hit mommy,
just like love hit my sister,
love wouln't let them excape and I'v seen the pain the blood and the tears,
so love has become the source of all my fears,
I never stay in love cause i feel the need to fun from love,  but this I will never tell,
I may say I love but it's not the same type of love inwhich you know of
because when I love I love deeply,
but my love for love is running swifly,
I am getting older by the year and one day I will have to live with a man,
but I will not love that man I will fear that man,  because if I love him he will grow 
mad, and he will one day hit me,
thats why I fear any guy loving me,
because loves my tragedies.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Clown The Fool And Me

Many nights I've sat typing things for which none will ever read.
Burning midnight oil only to add to this mornings trash.
Then going about the act of pretending it's all good.

Wearing a mask of my own creation.
These long nights of endless confession to empty wall's.
Hollow thoughts from a bitter heart to scared to exist as himself.

The page lay beaten only to be erased.

the circus of life is a deception for after the show when the dust settles 
the magic gives way to truth.
Tempers flare  and thoose happy clowns appear to be just angry ordinary
people who hate and loath there so called friends.

Dream that it would have all been diffrent if not for this or that.
never taking blame just putting it on others like normal so called adults.

These long nights breed anger and that page takes  the punishment
and like a coward I look apon this act of pure thoughtless work.
And second guess myself wishing only for the approval of people who yearn only 
for the approval  of some one else.
Like hamster in a wheel never getting anywhere.

For who wants to be themself when you can be a watered down version of someone who 
wasnt good to start with.

I cant say the comforts of being a clone wouldnt be nice .
But I never did like things that were nice.
Never cared about being on a list  or kissing someone's rearend just 
to have them talk about me as soon as my back was turned.

Be yourself and cherish thoose who hate  for  the bitter and cruel amount to
nothing  and there only hope is to lure you down there same dead end life.

The clown tries in vain to make you laugh.
The fool doenst know or care if you laugh.
And me Im just the jerk adding to the mornings trash empty 
as the page that sit's befor him.


Details | Personification | |

Can you hear me god

Sometimes I question my own faith and wonder if you are real,
can you really feel all the pain I feel.
I wonder, Can you hear me god?

Sometimes I cry myself to sleep,
do you know the reasons why I weep.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I give up on myself,
is it because you forgot about me and chose to let me deal with myself.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes people hurt me , and sometimes I hurt others,
but it seems you let them be and it's my life you choose to bother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes i feel like I'm your mistake,
is it because you judge me for all the mistakes that I make.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I hate others and sometimes others hate me,
but it seems you don't see others,
and it's my life with troubles you smother.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I hate you for taking my mother,
Sometimes I hate you even more for portraying my father.
I wonder, Can you hear me God?

Sometimes I think of my past,
and that's when I reliaze that nomatter what I'm feeling now,
it will never compare to the pain I was feeling back then.
It's times like this that I realize that's when you truelly chose to be my father,
to scold me, but hold me, to teach me but reach me.
To show me that my pain won't always last.

I believe this is true, at least that's the picture you drew,
yet I still wondwer, Can you hear me God?


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate...

The collision of my feelings,
And the confrontation of words,
The lies,
All the lies…
Hatred, hate, all the hate,
I hate…

Drown in my pain,
Until you suffocate,
And free yourself from me,
To free me,
I hate…

A million words burn in me,
A thousand screams call for freedom,
For salvation,
But my soul is abandoned
In the void,
I hate…

Let me fade away,
Let me turn into black,
Let me dissolve into nothing,
To free me from myself,
I hate…

Fear,
Free my fearful heart,
And take me away,
Anyone…
Let these words stop:
“I hate.”

Break the chain of eternity,
Kill the immortality of my torment,
Let my blood flow in my veins,
And let the air circulate
In and out of my body,
I hate…

I hate…
You…and you,
I hate life,
I hate me,
I hate…
Everything,
Hate, hate, hate,

“Hate , hate , hate”
I woke up saying,
With the letters,
“H” “A” “T” “E”
Sliding between my lips,

I cried loudly,
For I felt it,
I felt the hate,
Conceal all my feelings;
I felt it make me grab a knife…
I stabbed myself!
I stabbed my heart…it made me stab myself…
Just to free itself from me,
And to free me,
Forever…  


 



Details | Free verse | |

I Hate This

I hate this, I really do
Why do you have to do this to me
I can't ever be happy
You take it all away!
I can never be proud of myself
Some how you take it away!
I can never smile
Because you make fun of me
I hate it! I hate this!
Why can't  you just shut-up!
Not talk to me
Leave me alone!
Let me enjoy my fame
I hate when you do this to me!
Always hurt me
In a different way
I hate this!


Details | I do not know? | |

Hidden Emotion

Even though I may look happy
Insinde I am still depressed
You go by what you see not think
My saddened soul begins to sink
I hate this world, I hate my life
Tears of blood I grip my knife
I think of how my world will end
But yet I still cannot comprehend
I chose my fate, but did I lie
Leaving this world I will now die...


Details | Rhyme | |

At Night Alone

  So here I sit, at night, alone
  Bored and just too many cigarettes to burn
  So I smoke and I wait, seemingly for a call
  And really just ache, cause it's not coming at all
  You're too many miles away from home
  I feel the distance at night, alone
  I hate you for the restless nights
  And I hate me because I know it's not right
  To sit in front of the computer screen
  Searching for the words I just want to scream
  Not even knowing the pain that I feel
  How to describe what feels so unreal
  I miss, just miss, everything that is you
  Laughing for hours at things that you do
  And how could it be that this is the end
  What was to be a lifetime of new things to begin
  But here I sit, at night alone
  And the numbness inside is all that I know


Details | Prose Poetry | |

And Then I Pray

You came into my life, why? I didn’t invite you, I never wanted you around, you 
know this , but you will not leave, you don’t know how much I hate you, and yet I 
don’t hate anyone or anything. When you hate, to me, it is the same as killing. If I 
only knew how to kill you ……. It would have been done many times over. I awake 
every morning and there you are, ready to make my life miserable, the one thing 
you enjoy most in your life. Wherever I go, you follow bringing your misery into my 
life. Why cant you just leave and leave me in peace? I fight with you every day, and 
it hurts so much, so much it hurts to fight with anyone, even you. There is one 
way and only one way to rid you of me. I think of this often, but then where would I 
be? I would not be, because you are part of me, your name is bi-polar. Handed 
down from my father and from his father, and from me to my son, but he refuses 
to recognize you, so he fights you without help he could get. If he would only say I 
know who you are. I hurt for him everyday, and then I pray.
Oh God please forgive me for what I have brought upon my son. Son, I love you, 
and am so sorry for what you go through. Maybe someday we will talk again. Dad


Details | Free verse | |

About Me Pt. 1

What can I say about me that you can’t learn within a day?
I was born to be a hopeless romantic,
except I never have any romance in my life
I am a gentleman,
I take my chivalry seriously
I want someone to hold and never let go of,
I want someone who will be there
I want someone who will tell me everything will be okay
I want someone to hold my hand
I find myself surrounded by beautiful girls,
but they always seem to find happiness in somebody else
I’m great at reading the negative signs
I’m terrible at reading the positive ones
I always misinterpret friendship for attraction
or vice versa out of fear of rejection,
out of fear of being mistaken, yet again
I am always, just a friend
I am blessed with the best friends in the world
but, I fear, I might turn my back on them to some extent over a girl
I’m afraid my friends will disappear
finally realizing I’m not worth keeping
finally seeing what I see in myself
but, I hope and pray that they never do
Far too often I wonder
I wonder if I died, if anybody would really care?
I wonder if anybody would really miss me like they say they would were I not 
there?
I’m smarter than I’ll admit,
but I still fear I’m not smart enough
I’m afraid I’ll never reach my goals
I’m afraid I’ll never graduate from college,
become a doctor,
meet that one special girl,
and start a family of my own
I’m afraid to let myself down,
but I’m even more afraid of letting down others
I am a people pleaser,
but I’m not sure if I ever really please many people 
I like knowing what’s around the bend,
but I don’t enjoy monotony 
or spoiled endings
I enjoy having fun,
but I enjoy being serious
I’m easily amused
but I hate stupid things
I write best when I’m depressed,
but I hate feeling that way
Yet I love writing so much,
I just can’t win


Details | Narrative | |

Just for Me

In the past I remember how things were so simple
When I was little my cheeks had such cute dimples
Looking back I remember how sweet I was as a child
When I think again my heart told me I was so wild
Yet, in time my simple choices was revealed as true as anyone
The reason I was the way I am today, I did things, to get done
Finishing lots of my undone ideas was so incredibly hard
So I figure my heart and choices should never hold in no bard
I never thought I would learn heart aches and pain
With such under statement I did things for no gain
I was a child who held true to what he has learned
But as we got older those kinda perspective would get me burned
When I made up my mind that people was not kind
I led myself in a confusion that I was blind
In the past I do recall that seeing is believing
So I was the one who stood their with friends leaving
Alone, I felt I did not belong, I cherish each person who knew me
I got older too see how the world works it stung me like a bee
The feeling of tingling ran through my vain
My view of the world and people who knew me was stained
Now I know they are out for their selves with no kind feelings
Life I know is just a joke because of who I hung out with seeing
Today as I look at the world it is in such shambles and astray
And rather fallow everyone I just walk away


Details | Couplet | |

Love, Hate And My Fate

In my quest of life sublime
I face a mountain I must climb

There dwells up inside of me
A growing amount of hostility

My anger is growing day by day
Regardless of the prayers I pray

Like two grinding tectonic plates
One is love and the other is hate

As the plates slowly grind away
Price of hate my love must pay

Like a beautiful exotic dance
Hate is held in dark romance

Like a lone mountain flower
Love shall hold mystic power

The two sides of a single face
Only one can rule this place

Off to hell fallen angels go
Is this the fate of my soul?

Is the meaning of this rhyme?
Bound by the hands of time

For all to hear and all to see
Love and hate each dwell in me

Love and hate each have their goal
I wonder, which shall win my soul




Details | I do not know? | |

RIP Virginity

Dear Sir,my innocence is gone now, no more fear ,
Do you love to **** me again, I am always here.
I wonder when you taught me how to use a pen,
I was so into you but my ****** was in pain !
I was crying, i was too immature to understand
I was turning only 13, I couldn't feel what happened.
but I promise I never forget what you taught me at the end.
I begged you to stop and I looked into your eyes,
there was a reflection of a cruel world,that what I deserved!
Don't be afraid, mommy never knows what you did,
Nobody knows that you made me bleed.
Dear sir,my innocence is gone with all my tears,
as I had no safe place to hide myself from fears.
Nobody saw anything as your world was blind!
having hidden hatred inside,a virgin died.
Dear sir, time cannot erase your memories,
time doesn't heal all wounds,that you marked,
yes,you took my innocence that will be always on my mind.


Details | Munaajaat | |

Tell Me

I'm lost hurt and angry
Why did you take his life
I want, No I need to know
Tell me, Tell me why
I deserve to know

Haven't you done enough to him
What'd he ever do to you
He suffered his whole life
Suffered more than anyone deserved
Tell me, Tell me why you did it
I have a right to know

Why'd you let him born to them
Born to worthless parents
Parents who didn't care
They threw him away like garbage
Pawned him off on someone else
Tell me, Tell me why
Explain how you could do that

You gave him Polio
You let others treat him like disease
You took away the full use of his legs
You warped his hand and foot
Tell me, Explain to me why
I deserve to know

You let others think he was crazy
You let it go on for over year
You didn't stop it, Why
Tell me, Give me your reason
Answer me, Help me to understand

You go and make matters worse
You gave him Cancer
You didn't give him a chance to fight back
You just jerked him away from us
Tell me, Tell me how
How you could be so cruel

How can others not question you
When others do it, It's murder
But when it's by your hand
It's your will, Their fate
Tell me, What makes you so different
Your no better than the demons knocking at the door

You heard me beg and plead
You know I'm not afraid to die
I was willing to carry it all for him
I was willing to take my Daddy's place
You didn't even let me say Goodbye
Tell me, Tell me why I couldn't take his place
Answer me, you owe me that much



Sabrina Niday Hansel
~Niday40873~

(motif) Spiritual


Details | Ode | |

Love is a Sacrifice

You have my soul, but you have your fate Whatever your words, I’m willing to take You have my word; I’ll give you my breath It’s like a chain that would never be break You are my love with all my heart, I’ll fight for you with all my might. And in the way, you admire your goals, You hold my hands, but not so close. As you go to your chosen path, I’ll accept the fact that we will be apart. In the dark side, I leave behind Within my faith, that you’ll arise Please don’t look back, coz I’m fighting still I’m hurting so much! Don’t want to have you near I accept my fate for what it does, I’m bleeding so much, do you know for whom it was? You reach your goals, as you want to have, Would you remind the man that gave what he had? As you reach the stars, and be the one Be a sun that shines its own. After the rain, the rainbow comes, Like dark in the moon, when the light flash A glimpse from you at least a short For then I knew my pain is worth.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Shunned

Breaking down in the heart and mind.
With all regrets that are truly not kind.
Shocked at people are, so painful to see.
Abused with hated and ecstasy.
Violated and directed with torments
Lost of words or comments.
Hatred gushing out of life long experience.
Reminding yourself to become absence.
Coward and scared to even breathe.
Like the feeling of knives unsheathe.
Sharp but not enough to cut.
Enough to scare like a door that immediately shut.
The hand raised to help you is a lie.
It is a hand that slaps you so you can die.
Rough around the edges.
Crawling in your dreams in ledges.
Powered to stay alive.
You feel people want you to take a dive.
Just stop, and fall down.
Hoping to break your mental crown.
Hiding a feeling that never feels real.
Like shaking hands with demons for a deal.
Blocked out, out of your own story.
Thinking that people are stealing your glory.
Ashamed with fear.
With eyes that are full of tear.
Lost in such hidden romance.
Luck has it seems to be a dance.
Moving around in your head.
With scary thoughts and dread.
Feels like you never leave.
So you feel so many that grieve.
In your mind that is lost.
Full of drama that holds you down in cost.
Keeping in the shadow.
You watch people so shallow.
Gut instinct says that life with them is a muse.
When your just standing your accuse.
Society is just so lame.
Like all the people that are in it your to blame.
Soloing life is a brief.
Walking away is some what a relief.
I dreamed of many things.
With beautiful sorrows of wings.
Wavered in a direction that leads no where.
Escaping everything by a hair.
Pointing into the sky.
And asking yourself why.
The cage is so big.
Just enough to put on a huge rig.
Moving back and fourth.
It feels that your life does not have a worth.
Caned by laws of laughter to deceive.
Shackled up to be bent to your will to receive.
When you hope to hope.
A person can just show you the rope.
They have such friendly hands.
Like the deserts of sands.
Dangerous it is to just keep walking in it.
Lost cannot find your way even a little bit.
Just seem like your heart feels dry.
Then you give up and give a sigh.
That moment that you do is just all a dream.
You are really in a ward you will scream.
Thrust upon you because you could not protect.
So what cost you is this effect.
Warping in to your mind to leave this place.
You feel full of disgrace.
With nothing to drink.
Causing your true self to think.
Grief is such a pain with sorrow to gain.
Looking out in your own rain.




Details | Narrative | |

Don't Take My Kindness For Granted

You think that you know me
But you don't know at all
Every day you say your sorry
After that I fall
I hate it when you lie
You think your doing good
When all you cause is pain
Just tell me that you hate me
So my life won't be in vein...


Details | Narrative | |

My brother

Nascent you were to this macrocosm,
Blessed  you were to parents,
Dyspoeic, unsounded from mother’s womb you emerged,
Many conceived you were with Jesus,
Afore brought forth into beingness.
Doctors resuscitate with oxygen mask,
Travail, thirty minutes passed brought you back.
Triumphant over death, won life for yourself.
Whence you cried, Father gloating in joy cried a river.
Thence avouch, sweven God’s work as you grow a man.
engendered after, saw father’s fond on you.
Through many years of togetherness;
Pettifogger we fought and punished.
Though non twins, grew more like identical.
when you cried a child, I cried and still does.
Such is the love of brother, my brother.
Thither you went away to boarding school.
Whereby learned ways, good and bad.
And drew more to wassailer, drunkenness.
dissever we became, perceived I abhorred my brother.
Fondly Imbibe in whisky, disremembering your sole purpose,
So fond nearly you died like once when born half dead.
And whence in hospital bed you battled for life,
I cried a river, my brother.
I do not hate as I hate cockatrice,
I care more than I care the girl of my life.
And whence you live wastefully rummy, I rue.
Come at able, find oneself and the purpose, my brother.
The life you once battled and won when first born,
Be not languish in vain.
Be cumbered and hugger-mugger no more.
Ere in final resting place you lay,
I invoke to envision you gratified after years.
Heedless of how you impeach, I despise;
I merely have one brother.
My brother! My brother.


Details | Pantoum | |

They Took Away My Innocence

They took away my innocence—
A child, but merely two years old.
My soul left with ambivalence;
I hate myself as I grow old.

A child, but merely two years old—
Abandoned, glossed over, abused.
I hate myself as I grow old;
Completely left confused and used.

Abandoned, glossed over, abused—
Why would a person hurt a child?
Completely left confused and used—
Naïf, so trusting, meek, and mild.

Why would a person hurt a child?
My soul left with ambivalence—
Naïf, so trusting, meek, and mild.
They took away my innocence.

	



Details | Lyric | |

Solipsist

Let the Deicide commence.

You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart is beating out of your chest!
And you have slayed the ones whom would love you for anything less
Ready to consume the final fragments of innocence,
And for you there is no forgiveness,
On your knees pleading, screaming to a tyrant in the skies;
The father of lies.

I will never be enslaved in your superiority
The people agree: jaded of your false dichotomies.
Know: I will be whomever nature intends to be
Apollo and I will share our dreams,
and you will be forced to see
your failure!

I know who you are...
Readily the first to present your scars
Chained by some despot or mental czar
An emotional homunculus in your mind, behind bars
Reluctant to escape - even when proven fake
Your demented mind - depths no one will penetrate!
 
...And you see me suffering
Not caring of any casualties
Just as long you recieve your safeguard of sympathy
So very wary of the masses and their Anarchy; Liberious ways

Solipsist - Is there no one you can see?
Even if she was presented burning?
Solipsist - Is there no one you can believe?
Even if Sophia was screaming?
Solipsist - Know you have killed and abused me
Imprisoned in your own  personal reality 




Details | Acrostic | |

Reflections: Midlife Crisis

P     aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A     cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N     othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I      nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C     hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
!!


Details | Rhyme | |

May the Love of Jesus Touch You


May the Love of Jesus Touch You!

May the love of Jesus bless and touch you!
May his presence be with
 and uplift you!

May the joys of the love make
 you complete!
And touch you, from your
 head to your feet!

May the glory of the lord
 be with and keep you!
His majestic power can really touch you!

May the words that he’s spoken,
touch your spirit!
His mercy and salvation… 
 He freely give it!

May the sweetness of Jesus,
 into your life bring!
His righteousness and beauty!  
Your everything!

May you take some time
 with Jesus in prayer?
How much he loves you! 
 How much he cares!

By Jim Pemberton    07.28.13





Details | Personification | |

Not Really

How it must hurt you so on days like this,
  Walking around with a frown clutching your fist.
Hearing the words that are meant to anger you,
   Confused  you cry because there is nothing you can do.
Your mind is playing tricks on you driving you to say,
    I hate you all and the games you play please just go away.
Trusting nobody you are not sure which way you sould go,
    It's not real and  all in your head  is what you do not know.
Waiting to see just what tomorrow will possibly bring,
    All will be perfect and you wont rememver a thing.
Your thoughts they torement you  almost every day,
   Each night asking our Lord why your life is this way.
Feeling so alone thinking there is nobody who cares,
   But actually there is so many but you are not aware .
If only you would hear me so you might begin to see,
   You must believe in yourself if you want to be free.
You must have some faith if you are to understand ,
    What God has in store for you and what he has planned.
All the hurt and anger will soon begin to disappear ,
    You'll stand up tall again facing life with no fear.
Please remember always that you are never alone,
    By listening with your heart your path will be shown.
TAC


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate The Word - Hate





             HATE is a very strong word                            I like the soft words
                    HATE is awful                                  why not show consideration
               HATE leads to unrest                                     I like the peace
               HATE leads to hostility                                  friendship is a joy
                  HATE means war                                 why kill, when we can love
            The world is full of HATRED                  let`s share the world with happiness
                                      
                                                



                


*** NOT for the contest.
A-L Andresen
28.July 2012


Details | ABC | |

Beast



Bitter by ; being mentally bruised and battered most of my life,
shaken with fright without a single soul to help me
through the troubles unseen horrors of the night, 
from an evil source that I fear to strike. 
But as the evil forces, who limited my choices 
that when I found my stallion horses. 
Swiftly it came to my head I can run and I cannot hide, 
feeling the Beast closing in on every time I decide to hide. 
Tired of running and tired of alluding this
relentless creep as my red bolt eyes weep 
feeling rest-less, likes a lonely defeated warrior from his home in retreat 
that is when I knew it time to rest, to release my Beast. 
But in a fight, I may not win however as I cast out my dirty words sin
I made sure it felt my impact, to the bloody end.

by Keith Relf


Details | Rhyme | |

We All Bleed Red

Thoughts swirling in my head
Remembering we all bleed red
Life is a tapestry
True happiness a dream
Such a confusing world
Paradise yet to be seen
A country with a dark past 
Some hauntings still last
Unwilling to change, planted in lead
Feel it with your heart and head
No crystal ball
No room to fall
Deeper into our subconscious
Life is far too precious
A bitter pill
Such a large hill
Let freedom ring
Let children sing
Saying hell no
Not in our name
This is a political game
Most looking for fame
Dig a grave
Hell, it's a road you paved 
Here to make waves
 Those who are adverse
Stuck with the curse
Burden on the young
Who is truly free
It will never be you or me
We mourn over the dead
A nation so divided
We are tainted
From birth we are painted
Who are the real heros
We all have blood on our hands
Invisible to most
Only the true can see
Even on our homeland
We have a roll to play
History is witten in stone
Learn from it instead of beating it to the bone
Our futute is only written in clay
Still malleable
All life is valuable
Old school. . New school
It is what's in our hearts
Time to stop tearing one another apart
Just take a stand
Even if you walk alone
Hold your head up high
What is life if you are to afraid to fly?
We all bleed red
Time for a transformation
Get ready to shed 
Change doesn't come easy
Fear those with nothing to lose
We all deserve to live as we choose
Get ready because we all have a voice
Step up and make a choice
We condemn those we don't know
Some of us even for show
Confusion runs through me
Unsure of how things should be
My constant idealistic views
Desperately grasping not to become jaded
Dreaming of a utopia
Generations before us
Marching through the gas
Fighting for peace and love
Is the joke on me?
Is there something I can't see? 
Scared for our youth
Where are the leaders?
Put personal pride aside
Stand tall
Take risks
Look in the mirror
It's time to live without fear


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

The number the brand

When I met her , a very old lady she was , yet inside lay a frightened child .
I felt my heart cry , I felt as if I was touching history itself , as I made this older lady, child,  chai .

I remember the day , and so many tears I have cried
I have cried before she and I met 
As a child , so many tears, left confused inside .

Not understanding Why , and how could we stand by and live our lives as if this never happened ?

It happened , we are left in dismay of the movies seen the accounts taken of History 
My self ..I have caught stereotyping the very people whom did this to she , the rest of her Family erased .


The white candles we light , we try and forgive , or just simply block this pain out completely.

It occurs , over and over , as it has been said History will repeat .
When thinking of my children , when I think of that little girl losing ,  cold and scarred , feeling only defeat .

There is a lesson here and I pray , that all whom have been taken from life , have no pain and are gifted spirits throughout eternity . May they be warmed with love,  and reunited with the ones they lost .

The first time I met her , her old hand I took and warmed it with mine , I held it for a long time . 
You could not,  but notice ..the Evil imprinted on skin , the Evil only to remind.
This very old Soul , in her eyes you could see . 
The child that once lived , so innocently free, not aware yet,  of the Hostility .

I speak of a Little girl, I speak of a old woman , I speak of a Jewish,  chosen Religion.

There as I held her frail , old hand  , a brand , a number stamped in Evil a long time ago .   In 1945  , once in our distant, yet Frightening  past . 

We should never forget , never forget it happened , never forget all the names .
If we do , we have learned nothing , A World living in Shame .
                                " Etta Babooshka Kofman  "


Details | I do not know? | |

I Don't Care

I Don't Care...


I don't care,
if you're battered black and blue,

I don't care,
just as long as I can drink and screw.



I don't care,
if you've lost your damn job,

I don't care,
you're just a kernel off the cob.



I don't care,
when I see you begging in the street,

I don't care,
I get to suckle on capitalism's raw teat.



I don't care,
about the elderly, the poor, or the weak,

I don't care,
if the earth will be inherited by the meek.



I don't care,
if the climate is warming, I'm so much cooler,

I don't care,
in my penthouse I'm the boss, the only ruler.



I don't care,
for those rolling for scraps in the muck,

I don't care,

I really don't care, cos' I don't give a f**k



inspired by Bob Geldof's "The Great Song of Indifference"


Details | I do not know? | |

A Story My Mother Told Me

someone always told me this with tears in her eyes...


(for Lata Sethi's late-mother, who was my mother’s ‘sister’ and who took us all into her heart, and for Lata and Ravi Sethi of Defence Colony, New Delhi)


a wife left South Africa in the 1960’s to join her husband 
who was in exile at the time...

in 1970 the husband was sent by the African National Congress to India to be its representative there...

the husband and wife spent two years in Bombay...

one afternoon the husband fell and broke his leg...

the wife knocked on their neighbour’s door, in an apartment complex in Bombay

the neighbour was an old Punjabi lady...

the wife asked the neighbour for a doctor to see to the injured husband...

a Parsi ‘Bone-Setter’ was promptly summoned...

the husband still recalls his anxiety of seeing ‘Bone-Setter’ written on the Parsi gentleman’s bag...

by the way, the ‘Bone-Setter’ worked his ancient craft and surprisingly for the husband, his broken leg healed quite soon...

but still on that day, while the ‘Bone-Setter’ was seeing to the husband...

the wife and the old Punjabi lady from next door got to talking about this and that and where these new Indian-looking wife and husband were from as their accents were clearly not local...

the wife told the elderly Punjabi lady that the husband worked for the African National Congress of South Africa and had left to serve the ANC from exile...

and that they had left their two children behind in South Africa and that they were now essentially political refugees...

the Punjabi lady broke down and wept uncontrollably...

she told the foreign woman that she too had had to leave her home in Lahore in 1947 and flee to India with only the clothes on her back when the partition of the subcontinent took place and Pakistan was formed and at a time when Hindus from Pakistan fled to India and vice versa...

the Punjabi lady then asked the foreign woman her name...

‘Zubeida’, but you can call me ‘Zubie’...

the Punjabi woman hugged Zubie some more, and the two women, seperated by age and geography, wept, sharing a shared pain...

the Punjabi woman told Zubie that she was her ‘sister’ from that day on, and that she felt that pain of exile and forced migration and what being a refugee felt like...

Zubie and her husband Mosie became the closest of friends with the Hindu Punjabi neighbours who were kicked out of Pakistan by Muslims...

then came the time for Mosie and Zubie to leave for Delhi where the African National Congress office was based...

the elderly Punjabi lady and Mosie and Zubie said their goodbyes...

a year or two later, the elderly Punjabi lady’s daughter Lata married Ravi Sethi and the couple moved to Delhi...

the elderly Punjabi lady called Zubie and told her that her daughter was coming to Delhi to live and that she had told Lata, her daughter that she had a ‘sister’ in Delhi...

Lata and Ravi Sethi then moved to Delhi...

This was in the mid-1970’s...

Lata and Zubie became the closest of friends and that bond stayed true, and stays true till today, though Zubie is no more, and the elderly Punjabi lady is no more...

the son and the husband still have a bond with Lata and Ravi Sethi...

a bond that was forged between Hindu and Muslim and between two continents across the barriers of creed and time...

a bond strong and resilient, forged by the pain and trauma of a shared experience...

and that is why, and I shall never stop believing this, that hope shines still, for with all the talk of this and of that, and of that and of this, there will always be a simple woman, somewhere, anywhere, who would take the ‘other’ in as a sister, a fellow human...

and that is why there will always be hope...
hope in the midst of this and of that and of that and of this...

hope...


(for Lata Sethi's late-mother, who was my mother’s ‘sister’ and who took us all into her heart, and for Lata and Ravi Sethi of Defence Colony, New Delhi)


Details | Lyric | |

Lacerated Wings

They are bound to the Earth like trees
Suffocating under the weight of an icy grave 
Reaching to be free, but only their limbs are seen
Hoping that one day someone will see:
They can't escape with lacerated wings

The ocean surrounds me, covering everything
Nothing will be clearly seen; confusion overwhelming
No-one can save you, you're on your own, left to die
Manipulating every bleeding heart you can find
I can't escape with lacerated wings.

Swarms of nets, waves of screams 
Entangle: your captive illusions and dreams
The mask has be seared - The truth now they see
The Liar - Vampiric Fiend; lowly thief
And now they know you can't escape with Lacerated Wings

There's reasons for your rejections:
Your Heavy heart's transferred oppression
The scars are too deep to pass the trials
But you can find peace in your cage of empty spirals
You Cannot Escape With Lacerated Wings


Details | Ballad | |

The Alien

The Alien.
                           
"Here's the village Idiot
Here comes the loony fool"
So many taunts did follow him
Oh kids can be so cruel!
The Alien, his face all cowed
With caution treads his way
As the gossip done, invades him every day.

He's a shade too short on mighty brawn
He's a pilgrim of the soul
He's a Sailor floating through his dreams
And he has no worldly goals
And when those kids kicked footy balls
And swore and carried on
The alien got lost  within his own song.

He's been told that he be nothing
By so many through the years
And now his body broken
Still wading in his fears
The wings have made to open up
So the butterfly may rise
And so the mighty Phoenix 
must head he for the skies.

Dec 22 2003.


Details | Free verse | |

Theres a reason for everything I am

                                      Im crazy and a bit neurotic
                                         I am beautifully phycotic
                                          Im spectical and negative
                                               because of the past
                                        I am fantasticlly pessimistic
                                          Im angry and im bitter
                                Because of how this world made me
                                      I am pathedicly codependent
                                  because not many have been there
                                      Im a thinker and a speaker
                                       wouldnt you like to know
                          I am kind until betrayed than im cold and cruel
                            vicious and sneaky like a snake to its prey
                                I am caring ,until you dont care
                                     then ill tear you to shreds
                                    I am loving til you hate me
                                     Then ill hate you to death
                                    I am forgiving of little things
                                 But if you take it to far ill go away
                             I am a perfect friend and a scary enemy
                             I mean sleep with your eyes open scary
                               If your good to me im better to you
                               If your bad to me im worse to you
                           There is a reason for everything I am


Details | Free verse | |

the story of my life

When i was about 5 i was put in to a SRS. I was there tell i was 7 and when i got out i move to my grandma and grandpa. When i was 9 my older brother started to beet me up every day and all day long and then when the beating he was giving me stop working he started doing other thing to me. When i was 12 i losted my grandma and then my grandpa didn't want nothing to do with use and still don't. i took my brother *****tell i was 15 then started to beat on him. My brother put me in jail for a few year because if the *****he made me do now i am 21 and have losted and got back the girl that i love and care about her name is Holli Sczenski. Her family don't want use together so they are making her choose between them or me she dues not want to have to choose between use she loves use both and i know it and her family know it but there still doing it. On top of all that my own family is going throw somethings as while my mom is not doing vary good and we may or may not lost her in the next few years.


Details | Ballad | |

Antigone

I am the face of misery
My life, a dissonance of autumn and spring,
The years are written in the same
Lugubrious, nostalgic grey
How can it be the author to blame?
I cannot scream this all away…
Burn nor Bleed this all away…
To Death I am Ordained

Lacuna ever growing
With Velvet sheets of life flowing
Aeons apart of my "royalty"
Under the mask the cannot see...
Can you dispel this tragedy:
Antigone - Epiphany failing

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

No words of hope
No words of hate
Do I have Lenore to send to me:
The sordid child of Thebes
Caught In the longest nightmare
life - the slowest way to die

I know this is my life 
But I'm not under control
under the mask the will see
Just Another Human

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

If it must be…
Then just kill me,
(Antigone) sing me out of reality;
I wear this dissonant crown of shame
(Antigone) Of a kingdom's disdain
I hate to be this way... normalcy's bane
(Antigone) Here comes the edict, to blame
The sordid child of Thebes,
This is me,
Antigone

Can you dispel my life; this tragedy?
Can you control the storm in my mind?
I'm asking you: can you rid me
Of The Curse of Antigone?


Details | Monoku | |

Alien-nation

One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

The Rain and Wind

The wind blew events all over the place.
Intense emotions and it gave chase.
Lightning lighting to show us the sky.
People try to sleep and not cry.
Wisping by the wind keeps us awake.
The time trying to sleep the storms take.
Chills in everyone gives all shiver.
The clouds surrounded by moonlight is silver.
Heavenly prayers that the rain will stop.
The flood stopped a car the person in it was a cop.
People have seen such devastation.
The road that people made was week in creation.
Rivers near by was over flowing.
Trees that were there was not showing.
By the hour it claimed many.
My father woke up and did not see any.
Floating by was a boat.
Keeping people above water and a float.
My father kept a canoe.  
That some day we would use it, that he knew.
Time to paddle up and down the street.
The rain water kept getting on our seat.
It was so dark after the moon was behind the cloud.
Still the noise of thunder still covered the ears loud.
The smell of moist water never seem to go away.
My brothers seem to still sleep anyway.
My head was bobbing up and down.
I was so tired that I could not hear a sound.
The wind blew back and fourth.
It seems that my mom and dad paddle their worth.
Till all the people we saw with grace.
Help us out with embrace.
The time was so late at night.
Everyone was so sleepy and losing sight.
The fight with the weather was so hectic.
The feelings of energy was electric.
Losing to such natural disaster is hard to understand.
When people working hard to block the river with bags of sand.
With hard workers like my mom and dad.
They make things happen that is not bad.
Rough with weather they experience more than ever.
Leaders they are they are very clever.
From the night light of street lights to the morning glow.
The wind did not stop so.
Bringing in more clouds that ill.
The people who were still tired still had will.
The rush of water and waves blasting push the wall side.
Pushing and the force brought water inside.
The battle of our hour was getting long.
Backup people came to aid us was strong.
Rested they were to keep everyone with hope.
The people stopped the water with the strength of rope.
Heavy rain and loss of homes bring people together.
It is kind of sad that this was the only time to gather.
Chaos comes happiness how true.
This is why we are human that gives us a clue.
It is our nature to keep rain falling.
To know when it is time for our calling.
The winds bring such pain and sorrow.
That is why rain sometimes fallow.








Details | Crown of Sonnets | |

For My Unborn Seed and Girlfriend

Dam girl when Im locked up you set me free/ 
When Im not myself you set me free/ 
Im behind the lock and you got the key/
 Im blind with hate but you helpmy love see/ 
WhenIm lot and alone you take the lead/
 Without you I could have never planted my seed/ 
I hate to say it but you make me better/ 
You know I love you even without this letter/ 
When Im cold with sadness you my comfort warm sweater/
 I know I can be a bad boyfriend but Im going to be a better father/
 I might have wanted a son, but it really didnt matter because now you having my daughter/
 Im guess Im too stubborn girl with me why you even bother/
 my heart gets heart gets colder but for you it only gets hotter........


Details | Rhyme | |

Jennifer Part 3

She has so much pain inside of her,
she doesn't know how to address it.
So she turns the pain into anger,
after she explodes, she becomes quiet.

She goes up to her room, upset.
Why does the world hate her so?
She thinks to herself, “That’s it!”
But in reality, it isn't though.

She lies on her bed,
Pulls out her book and reads.
As she turns the pages, she loses her head,
In her mind, she thinks “This is what I need.”

A place to escape the world,
Somewhere she can run.
For it seems everyone hates this girl,
And nothing she does is fun.

She plays her cello 
And loses herself in the music
She does this when she feels low
Then she plays the song of her pick

She listens to the beat she makes,
Trying to make it sound perfect,
But oh, she keeps making mistakes,
She thinks that she will never get it.

She leaves the cello alone
And watches her shows
She then grabs her phone
And tells her best friend the show as it goes.

She leaves the TV on, 
Then she enters her laptop.
She stays on till dawn,
She just can’t seem to stop.

She loves the idea of leaving the real world
And entering an imaginary one.
That’s the story of the girl,
Who is never done.


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Questioning Life

Forget! Regret not, for it all has intention...
To attempt comprehension leads to double block wall.
In searching your question, much more loss is gotten, 
Confusion, dismay a deeper dug hole.
Infinitely seeking you strive for some meaning, 
the truth is quite simple you are not sole at all! 
Infusion connection the union eternal, 
Is easy to grasp when knowledge of whole,
is truly encountered from deep within query
The meaning the truth the love of it all...
Once trouble & strife and struggle are missing,
The clear light of being shows beauty once more.
Accept what is given agree to the treaty.
Fight not with your fears, and answer your call.
Find substance in living, step over delusions. 
Regardless of meaning, life’s radiance will soar.
So use this awareness these words and this practice,
Come forth tall and sturdy, head high and recall..
When sad and when empty in need of intention,
No doubts I plead! No need to explore!
Emotions you hold are sensed by your siblings,   
Your waves of sensation your truth and your soul... 
Are parts of us all, we are all together we are all but one!
In oneness we’re whole! 


Details | Lyric | |

Dedicated To... (Rap Verse)

This is dedicated to
the uneducated who,
segregate from the greats
the hate gave integration to,
though the paved the way for you,
you just simulate the flu,
infected with cold hearts
like inflammation made it through,
To...
You...

So take a second to converse,
listen to me, then speak,
just make sure you think first,
about the thirst, of the dream,
had by Dr. King, which would
hurt beyond the seams, if he 
witnessed everything,
The Scenes!

How we're treating one another,
Educated versus thugs, like
we are not brothers, What's the
point to jump from slavery to 
having white lovers, if less racism 
means the blacks hate each other?
My Brothers! I have no intent on
hating you, I just hope you make it
through. So this is Dedicated To
You...


Details | Rhyme | |

Ana

She writes her songs and her poems,
not one person know 'em.
She listens to the sound of her music,
she's stuck to it like a tick.

If someone took the time to listen,
her true colors would glisten.
She's put on a mask,
and hid everything when someone asked.

She was the type of girl who would always laugh,
making you wish it would last.
She was the type of girl who would smile the day away,
too bad it is no longer that way.

She is now the girl who is depressed,
I bet you're impressed.
Since no one could tell
that she was going through hell.

Everyone thought she was happy, 
when really, she felt crappy.
Everyone thought she was having the time of her life,
who would have guess her best friend was a knife?

She spent her days alone,
she seemed to do everything on her own.
Never once wanted help.
Thought she could do everything herself.

Then the day came,
when she lost the game.
She fell apart,
and everyone saw her broken heart.

They saw the way she overreacted.
Oh, if only you saw the way she acted.
She bruised herself, scratched herself, and made herself bleed,
no one knew what it was that she needed.

They saw her tears,
and that was what she feared.
They found out she wasn't okay,
oh, she hated that day.

Everyone found out about her secret,
and she wish they'd just forget,
but she knew they couldn't,
and that they wouldn't.

She left that town and started over,
no one knew she went undercover.
She said she got better,
when really... something else occurred. 

She secretly hurt herself,
and walked away from help.
Everyone thought she recovered,
when really, she was undercover.

She secretly wanted to get worse,
no one knew of course.
No one cared to ask,
if she was wearing her mask.

Now it's too late,
she locked the gate.
Killed herself,
everyone had forgotten she needed help.

Goodbye cold world,
this was a story of a girl
who once loved everyone
then feared who it was who won.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Rise, Die, Shine

Build me a temple high…high…high up where the sun can rise
Where good can shine and the evil die as a plant in winter time.
Let it rise
Let it die 
Let it shine
Build it high up the moon
But under the sky
And let the sun shine
Through the skin that dims inner light
Let the light unfold the eyes
And see the beauty inside of this small world that wants to shine
Let the war be the plant that could die in winter time
Let it rise
Let peace in the world rise
High…high up like a bird flying up to the sky
Let it die
Let hate die
As a phoenix and be reborn as a flower
Full of scents and beauty instead.
Let it shine
Let our inner light shine
Let it shine through our skin and show us that we can light up the way without hate and 
without pain
Let it rise
Let it die
Let it shine
Let the battle field turn into a garden
Let the soldiers be the flowers
And the ammunition be the fertilizing soil
Build me a temple high…high up the sky
To symbolize world peace.
Don’t rush take your time 
until we find out that we can shine
Let our soul rise
Let our evil die
Let our ability to find world peace shine.


Details | ABC | |

I Am Who I Am

Its bad enough that everyday I walk down memory lane, &&' It really puts me in alot of pain. I've been doing the best that I can, but I am who I am. I'm getting tired of everyones exspectations, people always pulling me in different directions. Even when I'm falling down, people still push me on the ground. I'm gonna keep trying, no more lying. No more games, done mentioning names. Being two-faced isn't cool, it just makes you look like a fool. I'm never looking back, that life was wack. I'm done trying to make everyone happy, when they treat me so crappy. I may not have alot of friends, in the end, but atleast I don't have to pretend. I'm gonna be true, with or without you. You'll see, I'm done letting people get to me.


Details | Carpe Diem | |

Lucid Dream

Look upon city once known by name,
ruins that I called home, streets swallowed by flame,
in time alive shell not witness less of what should you understand,
reach on to hand of a stranger, scroll remain;
in signs that might be changing welcome,
different of a man.

When dawn awakes and there is no light,
upon dusk of man darkness will be spread by sight,
in time not different change will arise, life we thought you knew,
death would recognize.

Hearts will bound to King without a Crown,
why do mothers shed tears, echo rooted in the ground,
is there reason of a foolish wars, contracts written in blood,
new born babies died breathless, can't even appreciate the Sun,
don't deserve to live, not worth of the land,
existence will be scattered in ashes,
you will be remembered
by name.


Details | Verse | |

Inevitable Bear

Oh lonely Inevitable Bear,
Padding claws, death in white
Sorrow in recurring nightmare
Instinct’s test; fight or flight?

Camouflage against the fence,
A challenge; my subconscious fear
Ominous slowly moving silence,
“Let me in, there’s a bear out here!”


Details | Rhyme | |

I'm a Muslim I'm not a Terrorist

I am a Muslim, I’m not a “terrorist”.
How can I be a terrorist
when I’m against all kinds of injustice.

I’m against every act of sin and evil.
I hate all kinds of crime and even loathe
what Adolf did to the innocent Jewish people.

I hate what God hates; He (Allah) hates oppression.
I’m against stealing, against taking away
people’s loved ones and belongings for no reason.

I’m against suicide bombings,
against racism, against ignorance,
against self-harm and even derision.

What God hates I hate and God (Allah) hates
oppression. I hate it too when people fight
for foolish nationalistic reasons.

I’m a Muslim; I follow the true religion
of mercy from Allah the Most Merciful
Who simply wants us to answer His Call
to believe in Just One -Just One God of all.

So don’t call me a “terrorist” when I clearly
don’t have a ‘mass destruction’ weapon
and my goal in life is to
be with our God (Allah) in Heaven.


Details | Rhyme | |

Death by Beauty

A smile moves across her lips
She gazes at her crime
A scar across her flesh and soul
To haunt her for all time
She’ll waste away for all she cares
Never stops to use her brain
Doesn’t care about the ones who are close
All she cares about is pain

She wants to be what the others expect of her
Doesn’t care about the self-respect for her
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Can’t she see what all she has got
Already?

Never to go back again
She feels the world is at an end
She will never show her grief
Although she’ll cry in empty streetS

She’d sooner live like a desolate mole
Living in fear in an empty hole
Screaming silent wails alone
Content to live in her mental home

A final tear falls from her eye
It hits the ground, it’s followed by
A beautiful body, mutated by hate
A kind word could have stopped it, but it is too late
One two many bricks in the wall in her mind
Molding her demise because her heart was blind
This self conscious being could never have won
For she was destroyed by the beautiful ones

She wouldn’t fight back, wouldn’t respect herself
In the end, she managed only to wreck herself
A rose can’t be a forget-me-not
Little did she know, she had all she had sought
Already


Details | Concrete | |

Confession Chamber

Forgive me Father for I have sinned,
for being born with you to begin,
its been a long time since my last confession,
I don't wont your blessing,
lies and resurrection.
I don't believe in love, I don't believe in faith,
cant stand my own kind,
humble in hate,
I don't believe in truth, I don't wont to be saved,
erase me from your list,
buried, unmarked,
graved.

Abused as a child,
bloodstains of a man,
only shovel awaits,
forgive me if you can.


Details | Concrete | |

Observer

A serpent underneath blue sky,
in shade of man, in twinkle of an eye,
above brick wall, in the structure, at the floor,
venom of white dove; contaminated food, undrinkable water,
misguided youth, pregnant daughter, unfaithful father and hateful son,
mothers do pray while we walk through Babylon;
on teli and in the press, on top shells,
price none the less, in bedroom and at your door..
dawn of a new day seemed to be dark,
after all.


Details | Sonnet | |

To A Child Who Has A Disorder

Children with an illness,
Go through life,
They are looked down apon,
Because they are different,
When really they are not,
They are no different from  you and me,
They have the same blood,
Running through their bodies,
Just as their hearts as well,
So, don't just look apon,
Their outer appearance,
And judge them,
For who they really are,
For a lot of them,
Are smarter and brighter,
Than you and I,
Could possibly be,
On our brightest day,
For they have the gifts,
From God up above,
So, always take the time,
To get to know their inner beauty,
For who they really are,
Cause they too need love,
Just as everyone else does,
If not even more.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Want

I want to sing you
I want to write you
I want to watch you
And describe you

I would like to compose you
You, my ninth symphony
To put you on a stave
To play your melody

I want to sculpt you
Without engraving too much
Hardly anything to change
Some details to fix

I want to photograph you
Under different lights
To whip with the flash
All those artifices that are hiding you

I want to break your records
Go through your body's limits
Jump higher, run further
When man an athlete is one

I could go on with other arts
But none of them seem good enough to define you
So I'll go on in which my words are the finest
For you, I'll never stop writing


Details | I do not know? | |

I Need You

I need you
To clutch me tight and
Wipe my tears away.
Telling me 
‘I know it looks bad but it’ll get better’.
 
I need hope
To come along and
Recuse me from 
The ceaseless
Pit I recurrently fall into.
 
I need someone
To be there when
I have my blade.
To say
‘Don’t damage your beauty’.

But you aren’t there.

You don’t listen;
Not to me.
I’m never there for you,
You completely
Shut me out.
 
As if I don’t care.
Like I’m not good enough.
Too pathetic; too worthless.
Not worth
The trouble.
 
So no one takes 
My blade from me.
And the angry lines slash
My arm
In every direction.
 
So there is a hopeless void
Inside of me, 
That grows bigger
Every day.
As you push me further away from you.
 
And I cry, 
Every night I cry myself
To sleep. Focusing on beaten
Broken hearts.
Because without you there is no reason to go on.


Details | I do not know? | |

The darkest hour

-Heartbreak

"It can never be", she says,
"Though I will love you forever,
But with him I must stay...
Never again to be together".

For so long we were soul mates,
By best friend, my lover.
From the moment I first saw her,
I loved her like no other.

Her words sting like a whip,
Flailing my bared soul.
The flesh ripped from my heart,
I can't cope with this blow.

-Denial

Fog fills my mind,
Tendrils snaking throughout.
A darkness descends,
The black night of my doubt.

How can this happen?
Why does she choose him over me?
He is her husband...
Not really, in name only.

It can't really be true,
Surely a nightmare possesses?
Torturous thoughts through my mind,
My sanity breaks, twists and wrenches.

-Anger

My mood darkens further,
The bitterness shows.
She promised to love me,
No matter what difficulties appose.

I hate her, no, I love her,
I just hate what she does.
Why let others always tell you,
Which direction to love?

The anger it seizes,
Blood pounds in my head.
I want to hurt him, I blame him,
I wish he was dead.

-Realisation

Days pass, feels like years,
My tears never cease.
Depression the curse now,
My heart can never know peace.

Everything around me,
Reminds me of her.
The love we had felt,
Those little things together.

My best friend is gone,
I can bear it no longer.
Finally my direction is clear,
I wish I was stronger.

-The darkest hour

Nothing left of myself,
Nightmares all I have left.
Of all passion and hope,
Now my life is bereft.

Release me, let me go,
My life is just torture.
I want it to end!
I want the pain to be over!

The blade is sharp,
For my blood it knows hunger.
Insanity, delirium,
My mind it does conquer.

No one is home,
The knife angles steeper.
My last words, "I love you"
Then bite it in deeper.

A noise outside...
No! Who can it be?
"Daddy, what are you doing?",
My son's voice, stops me.

Blood, so much blood,
My mind absently wonders,
How should I stop it?
Before the carpet it drenches.

-Postscript

Later I wonder,
What I became?
Now a band on my wrist,
To hide the scars of my shame.


Details | Heroic Couplets | |

BRITZ'S GIRLFRIENDS PAST

BRITZ’S GIRLFRIENDS PAST…LAST EPISODE”


He is young, handsome and got all it takes
To get involved with him, girls get tied to the stakes
Early in his age he set it off with one in a relationship
The love was fierce; both were wolves and none the sheep
Quarrel today and settle today; the relationship seem not to last
Sincerity danced to the lime-light; someone will surely get hurt at last
He ignorantly made her jealous and she sought a pay-back
She left him for his best friend but later sought to come back
Marriage and family ties got deep in line; too late to get back
The first girlfriend in his past.

So heartbroken and sad; he refused to show concern
The latest girl was so pretty and that calls for concern
She was his childhood friend he shared kisses with
Another relationship in line; amidst tares he took out the best wheat
It all started off so well, he broke the heart of her cousin
They were too close; the girl was close to his cousin
Childhood friendship an advantage thought this one will last
Unfortunately, the happy relationship came to end so fast
They lost it all: love, compatibility, friendship and in themselves a taste
The second girlfriend in his past.

Tired of relationships, he dived into friends with benefits
It was so sweet an adventure; to every girl, he got a benefit
He became so free and there was no love seen to be found
Nothing to loose as its just sex and the girls were always around
Tasting all juicy like Solomon’s pear; Complications in line he got scared
Frightened out his shoes; friends with benefit? He was no longer prepared
In the midst of storm; just like Jonah , he remembered there is someone so dear
The safest adventure is a relationship with her and there will be nothing else to fear
Difficult as of the beginning but she later came to terms and vowed to always be there
The third girl; presently in his present…


																…Lordvip…
D' Poetic Beast
						























Details | I do not know? | |

Anger Pain and Dramatic Stress

Anger, pain and dramatic stress 
The 3 things that I possess
Me, Reggie is okay at times
I sometimes choose to confide in my rhymes
I express my feelings through a pen
Just like some women get satisfaction through men.
This isn’t a poem because this is a thought
I have thoughts moving so fast, just too fast to be caught.
I hate being stressed
Just like I hate being possessed
I don’t mean to sound evil and mean
But I am different from the other people you have seen.
This is not a poem…this is a thought
I have thoughts moving so fast that they can’t be caught.
I have it good to some…others have it good to me
Some don’t realize how hard it is to be
A poet…it’s hard writin’ poetry with a lot of feeling
You feel forced to write something appealing
You break down cause cus’ you feel an obligation
To write good poetry that there breaks your concentration
I found a solution that my mind’s fighting
Maybe I should stop all the poetry and all the writing
These are fast ideas too fast to be caught
This isn’t a poem this is just a thought


Details | Rhyme | |

Nothing More Or Less

Millions of lives and souls untold
And to account it all
Words, lines, films
Imagination trims
A sliver of soft, scarlet ribbon
Hollywood rounds
Quills deliver
Writers flare with passion so strong
Filling minds with fantasies, reveries, histories
Tragedies
We consume it all like freshly baked bread
We feed until we are engorged and fed
A viral, universal mess
Ideas and unmade memories
Nothing more or less

My eyes remain glued to the screen
Living it all out
Tears dare to flow—to doubt
I should have thought of that
Can I truly let myself believe,
Someone else lived that!
Pound away your directors, script-writers, fighters
For miles and miles of stories remain unread
While the unknown remain in the grounds of humble malnourishment
Dead
Careers for the mind with a twist of the fable
Left us savage for the meal and the crumbs under the table
I can never let the raw truth rest
Naked, bare and empty—soothed
Nothing more or less

I cringed for originality 
Observed the world through the unedited scripts
The very act, the poetry pact
The wild animal drooling in the back
I was slapped in the face by my boss who had cracked
As the reviews bloated less and less
They wanted something awful, something flaw-ful—something new
And this empty brain in agony—HISSED 
I have lived in no epic battle of account
Of the collateral sufferings of my brothers
The stories the red carpet smothers
And still I ache to create
Before the other ones discover
I returned with ‘‘oh me’s’ and ‘oh my’s’’
With a work of pure genius—a storybook of lies
Nothing more or less

Little have I lacked to dream
Of contortioned pulls and dramatic fire
Stories that rarely brittle or tire
I fiddled with precious glass on edge
Foully eager for self-damage
As if it would trigger some legitimate spark 
Searching for creatures and features in the dark
No one unlocked the passage that night
For the starving idea-parched malice of right
But all welcomed with open arms
A pale mannequin filled with jewels and charms
Consuming, fuming dooming
All ghosts hoping, screaming, looming
Hoping that one day they would find themselves on the big screen
Their legacy real as it can possibly get
Nothing more or less


Details | Rhyme | |

Love You

You said don't look at me that way,
never knowing I loved you night and day,
no matter how you laid me out, or said i hate you
you abortion from hell,
The love I felt for you was more then any one could ever tell
and from the welts of my daddy's belt
was all the love you could have dealt
picking up the ash tray throwng it at
me like I'm the enemy, making my life ebony
filled with dark deception
I don't think those were your intentions,
my love for you deeper then the core of the earth,
why do you hate me? you gave me birth
all I wanted was your warm embrace
all you gave me was a bruise on my face
choking the life out of me, why do you hit me this way
I need the tears to not wet the innocence off my face
then your coffee cup stained my lace
mom please I love you don't make me leave I want to stay
I get on my knees and pray
but the demons inside her scared my saints away
those demons drag me away, the fear you gave
made me no longer a child at mind, this is what you made for being unkind
I no longer can cry, and let me tell you I try
don't need to dry my eyes, you put neither God or the devil
at my side, I made my own kingdom I pray when I hide
I want these demons to let go of my thighs, don't you realize all these 
beatings makes them know you don't care, so they come and visit me at night
this hatred grows when they try to put it inside, I've become numb
and you could care less, I can see it in your eyes you want me dead
All I want is your love, but that image only lives in my head
love you mom wish you were'nt dead.


Details | I do not know? | |

My heart is tender

My heart is tender, my spirit is pure
I hate no one I love all.
I seek knowledge even if I am poor.
It is the real weapon when nights fall.

I praise justice, I detest oppression.
Every day I forgive every day I tolerate
I dream of a day money isn’t our mission.

You is me and me is you
When you give, think you take
When you take think you give.
Life is but a shadow and a fake.

Try to be as you are good natured
Try to be yourself, a real tolerant
Love peace, hate war, feels cultured.
Or else be a delf, sure inconsistent.

We have one and the same lord
We belong to one and the same father
Why we fight, why spy why hold a sword
Kill me kill you kill us both together

You are poor I am rich
You need and I give
I mistake you teach
You mistake I forgive.

Never say East is east ,
Never say west is west
Never say He is best
Say you are my rest best

A bomb is easy and fast to make
Fire is easy and fast to set
A friend is difficult and tiring to take
A brother is difficult and boring to collect

Fire fire everywhere
Weapon weapon every when
War became a nightmare
Evil is a lion out of a den.

Our smile is the same
We populate the same earth
Why do we differ in aim?
Why do we carry a curse?

Be wise and give up be humble and try
One day you will stop, one day you will weep.
Repent in hast your sins multiply
The hell is large, the hell is deep.

Think of paradise prepared for the pious
You have got a heart for you to guide
Think of the hell prepared for the callous
You have got principles from God to abide

One day sure will come we will die
One day sure will come we will meet
You will be asked, you will sure reply
Why kill, why demolish why cheat

Each sin you commit, each good you
Will be in a book incarnated for you
That is the time of Rejoice or woe
Back again for life, of course a big No.


By Ahmed Mohamed Khidr
Egypt Tanta Kotour
Kotour secondary school













Details | Rhyme | |

Parallel Emotions-Love and Hate

Parallel Emotions - Love and Hate"

between love and hate
a fine line separates 
two emotions
para-interlocking devotions
easier to love someone
hate usurps more energy
power inflicts hurt 
into this tapestry
cross lines to emote feelings
jagged edges like daggers
smoothed and soothed 
by love
sweet love 
conquers life 
ultimately.

Linda-Marie The "Sweetheart" of P.S.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Love and Hate - The Hate bit 

If you had not bequeath your love
One so pure as a virgin's touch,
Heavenly Angel from above
This life I desired so much.
I would not know now
How to hate alone in desolation,
Unlucky in love is my fate
Condemned to immolation,
Memories, alas, do not fade
The hostility festers strong
This septic wound from cutting blade
Belie's a love that proved so wrong.

Harry Horsman

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Details | Rhyme | |

Seeking accompany

Seeking accompany- Zamreen Zarook
 
I kick to wonder what made me to cry,
Am really writing as a fry,
Myself launch to be dry,
This ink will be a victim for my cry.
 
What really went wrong with me all these day,
What made e to forget my last day,
I realized I jumped out of my track yesterday,
So I regret for that, what is called as present today.
 
Happiness have started to wave hands for this sinner,
Sadness have started to move inner,
The faults that I considered as miner,
So far changed as a miner of a winner.
 
My face was a comparison to sunlight,
Where as my routine changed it to moon light,
I wish to get that twilight,
As a sinner I started to search for that enlight.
 
I started to enjoy what is right,
I remade my faults as a kite,
I wished it would fly apart from my  sight,
My system said, you are free from your rubbish weight.
 
It proved that I always should depend on god,
In whatever the variation of my mood,
He is there to clear my victorious road,
So, I started to live according to His code.


Details | Rhyme | |

The Maid of Honour's Speech

I know the Maid of Honour’s duties do not include a speech,
But looking at the perfect Bride, a vision in gold... and peach,
I couldn’t let the moment pass, without the chance to say,
How perfect for each other you are, on this your wedding day.

We’ve been friends forever, in school you were a brat,
But now you’re older, more mature and getting rather fat!
I know you really hate me; the proof is in the dress,
This thing you chose to put me in, it really is a mess!

Bows and ruffles everywhere, however could you think,
That a mature twenty eight year old could pull off vivid pink?
I know your gown is hideous, but even with that said,
There’s still no reason why the other bridesmaids are in red.

It’s clear to all that your wish for me was just to look a show,
And as it is your special day, I thought I’d let it go.
You’d always seemed to find it hard to find the perfect man,
You sat and watched all of your friends find theirs and formed a plan.

You tried it on with who they’d found until you had a date.
And so you lost a fair few friends? You’d found yourself a mate!
And in the groom you’ve found a man who over flows with love,
And through the trials that lie ahead, he’ll help you rise above.

With hugs and kisses he’ll shower you and have a few to spare,
In fact I saw him earlier, canoodling with Claire!
Honey, don’t react like that, he’s a jerk, I know it’s true,
But remember that you first hooked up, at our engagement do.

A leopard cannot change its spots, or so the proverb says,
And you told me you only married him for money anyway!
But then again you always were a shallow two-faced cow,
And why on earth should you decide to change your ways right now?

So ladies and gentlemen please join me, raise a glass,
To the spiteful two-faced Bride, and her two-timing Ass!


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

"Friends Are The Best Enemy"

Don't justify my behaviors, point them as you always do, why do you keep on with this lie
if a paper stop you a year ago? Get along with us, is not like you gonna die, stop
pretending a life never had, i can make sure you die now, not hate either love, i just
play by the law of your anarchy, pathetic, don't lie anymore, you spit hate with flames, i
could feel that warm feeling on my face when you spited on me, insult? Not taken from you,
i know how much of a pig you can be, i see how much you do for money, i see your well
being become a parasite, a monster, remember when we were young and fought alongside me to
protect the child's on the city? How we held guns on war for the flag? Now look at this,
blood every were, we want to kill each other, why? After so many tears we shed together
when our comrade died in front of us, blood, after so many nights posted with blazing guns
on hands, blood, after the broken family we lived on we just fell apart like fool's, like
idiots we fight, for blood! Im sick of it, we were friends, we were thick and thin, we had
a life as partners, as comrades, as leaders, you made ashes, i did too, let you go inside
that room and kill them all, i should have killed you when i had the chance, when i had my
gun pointed at your head, but good old times stop my pull of the trigger, i could have
stop you, now we have this mess, you are a rogue man, i am the hunter, not for the flag,
but for my collection of heads, you run from me and keep on putting messages same way, you
won't stop, the collection of heads you and I build  together, now gone! Then i will kill
you! You deserve this hell after killing 34 children on their sleep, never opening eyes
again, this is why i want to kill you ex-friend.

Remember when you told me years ago... You were happy we ran from that war zone, you told
me we survive and we should spread the word, you said you wanted to change a piece of the
world, you said we were friends, now... After long 17 years, we fight each other, like we
fought back to back, so I put my gun on your fore head, hope you pull the trigger...

- POEM TO MOTIVATE POET'S TO WRITE THEIR HEARTS INTO THEIR STYLES -


Details | Canzone | |

Love Yourself

Don't hate the stars for their beauty
Don't hate the sun when it doesn't shine
Don't estimate someone's strength
Until you've seen them cry
Don't look for reasons to mourn
Look for reasons to rejoice
Instead of closing your mind
Consider each and every choice
Don't hate the sky for raining
Instead ask the clouds why they cry
Don't take the light inside yourself
Distribute it to the sky
Never hide your inner beauty
To please everyone else
Gather your pride and shine it bright
And go on loving yourself


Details | Rhyme | |

Paper Thin

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
For kicks is why I do it now.
You tell me to love but I never knew how.
Our feet hitting pavement,
We spent the day in sunny California with sun kissed skin.
I’m learning to forget and how to fade scars,
And you let me let myself down so hard.

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
And now I just do it for smiles,
We’ll never see flower girls stumbling down aisles.
I’d lose my head just before that chance,
But if you want we can still have a first dance.
Cause I think I say things that I don’t mean,
Once upon a time you meant the world to me.

Your paper-thin porcelain skin,
I know how to get right under it.
But I’m trying to refrain,
To make this not all end up in vain.
Maybe I can learn to love like some people do,
And you can learn to love yourself a little too.
Or it is in all fairness to let this go?
I guess we can try but then we’ll never know. 


Details | Lyric | |

Lettin' go

Lettin’ go




I am here in my present
(Leaving behind my past)

I am hurting and I am a human being 

I long to be loved by a good man

I am a beautiful black ‘chocolate’ full figured woman I wear a 42-44D bra and am something like 210 pounds

Love me or Hate me; either way I am goin’ to love me so if you accept me and love me that’s good but if you hate then go on and hate me


Details | Free verse | |

Light To Dark

You think you’ve gone just far enough,

I could smile knowing you’ve gone far enough that you can’t go back again

You think you were careful but,

I’ve caught a glimpse of your true, wretched form

You think you can find a way into my good graces

I’ve seen what you are, monsters with a friendly costume

You can’t deceive me anymore and, I don’t consort with serpents

You think I’m a game to be played but, trust me, you could never win

Don’t underestimate me

You think I’m a joke but, trust me you won’t be laughing

You think I’m just talking myself up but, trust me, you’re the ones going down

My eyes took too long to adjust

Better late than never

It may take a monster to know one but, I promise my teeth are sharper than yours

My first reaction to the hideous revelation that was your form was to weep

Fall to my knees, maybe even wretch my heart from my chest and onto the carpet

Then I thought about the mess it would make

I decided the only blood that will spill, will be your own

I was not weak, but I had a weakness

A heart of soft gold stitched to my sleeve with care

No longer

Now my heart is a stone so heavy

I could kill at least two birds at once 

Being the nice guy is a thing of the past 

Thanks for freeing me of that softness

You thought I was all sunshine and delicate things

When really I had just been swallowing razor blades

Now that sun is setting and I hope you see it was you who were wrong

Can you feel my darkness coming, because it’s eager to hold you

If you thought I was the one who would just stand still or turn to run

Your gonna be the one with tired feet

I’m not sad anymore

Just sick with the plague of your lies

Contagious, and I’m looking for someone to kiss

Even angels can make themselves wicked

When we do, we take no prisoners

Still think I’m a game

This one is just beginning


Details | Free verse | |

Abandon Hope All Ye Who Enter Here

Abandon Hope All Ye
 Who Enter Here



Ever the edifice
The bold and self-serving statue
Proud ego stamped
In the courtyards and squares
Of those who have diminished ( ordinary )

Ever the hero who by guile
Steals the heroes burial
With self sacrificial offerings of ballot boxes ( rigged )

Ever the flag waving
For the faceless dictators
Who by money and army medals adorned
Assume control
Via  coup d'état ( or money )

Ever the religious fanatic
Behind Iattola, priest, missionary and Papist
Ever the quiet and raucous rapist 
Of faith

Ever the secret of power hunger ( sanctioned )
Allowed to dictate
Through political expediencies
Ever the murder of country men
To rule the country

Ever the nationalistic barrage of pride
For coloured cloth
Defines identity
And not humanity ( human )

Ever the innocent left to bleed
To fill the coffers of nameless greed
And ever the hate to feed
The racial, political and religious idiocy ( bigotry )

Ever the door which opens
For men and women returning home
With the triumphal marches
Of black body bags

Ever the tear gas, riot shield and rubber bullet
Ever the faces of Tienanmen Square
Ever the bodies of The World Trade Centre
Ever the terrorism of lies
Ever the truth denied
Ever love defiled

Ever the innocent left to bleed
To fill the coffers of nameless greed
And ever the hate to feed
The racial, political and religious bigotry ( idiocy )



Ever the door which open
Welcoming home
Mothers and Fathers
From their long days labours ( ordinary )


Details | Rhyme | |

The Complex Brain

4/17/2013

To love or not to love that is the question 
Do I tell him how I feel;
Do I tell him how he makes everything seem surreal? 
Or do I stand back? 
Close my mouth like I've been caught up in a trap
Or should I squeal?
You make life seem so unreal 
This is the way you make me feel
You make life so surreal until;
Reality hits me, that you are no longer mine 
And we had to say our goodbyes 
It was no longer our time to shine
But forever in my heart you remain
I try to keep my feelings domain,
But I cannot resist the urge 
Of how you make me feel.
You make life so unreal 
So surreal 
Just by how you make me feel 
Is this love 
Or is this tragedy
When will my fairly god mother come sprout
And talk to me what all my dreams are about?
Will she give me that glass slipper or will I have to ask her?
I am always scared that my life will end in disaster 
Holding on, not letting 
My hope begins to show.
You saw the vunuablitly  in my eyes,
You saw how easily I begin to cry 
So you took it further, and pretend as if it we're over 
Maybe some things are better for us than we think 
True love can make our hearts sink
And our souls grow bitter 
And our skin turns old
We were once
So brave and bold;
And now we don't even have a place to call home 


Details | Rhyme | |

Music

Music is my escape
I sing along every second I can
It is the only place
Where people seem to understand

I sing at the top of my lungs,
Sing every word from my heart,
I eventually start to feel numb,
And soon I will fall apart.

I start crying and choke on my words,
I can no longer sing, too busy crying my eyes out.
My vision starts to blur,
That is true, without a doubt.

I’m crying because the music I listen to,
Seems to know my life story,
And it seems to know my feelings too,
These songs just scream out my whole back story.

I relive the moments the songs are talking about,
How they are all gone, or how they had hurt me. 
I just want to get out,
I wish that you could only see!

That I’m not that happy person anymore,
I’ve changed, but for the worst.
In my eyes, I only see closed doors,
And believe me, this isn’t the first.

If you saw me now, you’d hear my music,
See me shed my tears, and wipe my eyes, 
You’ll see the life drained out of me, as if there was a tick.
Oh, you’ll also get to hear me confess to all of my lies.

I try to forget everything and lose myself in the music,
Sing along to get any emotions out, 
That’s pretty much the basics,
What I’m all about. 


Details | Free verse | |

Brokenhearted

I do perceive
All the great words I receive 
But how could I be so far 
and yet so near,
to what I believe is fear.

Words can be like a chandelier,
falling from the ceiling.
Crushing every bone in your body,
until your heart starts bleeding.

Nothing feels like it makes sense,
its like I'm falling into a sharp fence
until the blood is drenched from my body
until the earth devours me like I'm shoddy.

This hurt.
This brokenhearted feeling.
This pain.
I feel so ashamed.

Why does bad things happen to me?
Why cant anyone see?
That deep down I'm broken,
But still people play me like I'm a token.

Trust,Hope and love I keep a s a treasure.
But still I'm being measured.
I cant help this feeling.
Nor my heart that's bleeding.

This hurt this pain.
Will it ever go away. 


Details | Free verse | |

Marked With His X

amid shackles and ropes 
with fire burning 
hatred into eyes 
a child stood 
without understanding 

seeing tears wet 
on mama's cheeks
and papa's goodness 
spread hatefully 
upon tracks
displayed as flags 
of their righteousness

worth descended
into slavery
of white opinions
placed on heads 
bleeding into 
superiority
expressed in violence 

he grew to become 
the hate 
that hate produced
with a fierce 
determination 
to offer freedom 
for all peoples 
who suffered at the hands 
of racist oppressors 

by any means 
necessary 
became the creed 
adopted from years 
of watching whites 
cover their crimes 
with veiled innocence 

what is not given 
freely 
must be demanded 
for to suffer 
in silence 
is complicity 
to accept 
is stupidity
to do nothing 
is cowardice 
and he was none of these

no one race 
is divine
only God is thus

and so he stood, tall 
against all those 
who deemed him 
unworthy 
taking his seat 
at the table 
of humanity 
demanding to be fed 
as all humans 
have an inalienable right to 

demanding that truth 
be served 
on large platters 
for the world to consume 
for where there is truth 
lies can not hide 
and hope is born 
into minds and 
hearts

in his life he struggled 
to find that light 
but in time 
he stepped into it 
basking in its glow 
ready to shine 
enlightenment
on a world 
still shadowed in 
hate's darkness 

but he would pay 
the price for dreams
with his life 
yet the price 
was never too high 
for the dream lived on 
and thrived 
giving birth 
to a future
that he marked 

with his



X...





Details | Free verse | |

Missing

I hate that I can't see you
or hear your gentle song
Life is unfair to me
How do I move on

Can I take the steps without you
Will my tears turn to smiles
Can I run against the winds
or crawl for miles and miles

I hate it when I can't see you
or hear your gentle song
Please life care for me
Then together we can move on


Details | Rhyme | |

Blatant Irony

She exists for a man only

He achieved what a man can

That of trying a trick abstractly

She easily got henned in hand!

Decisions are tough, exclaimed she aloud

Life in love is not easy 

He, a rose in hand, proud

Rose up to a plane above

She, a tender one with exalt

Thought of love as sincere admiration

Found out the abrupt truth, abomination!

Her only precious asset his inspiration

Her own body, as sexy asphalt!


Details | Narrative | |

When I Was A Child

It started when I was a child
I was a kid with a gift
That no one understood or recognized
Instead of loved I was picked on and ostracized

However I blocked it all out
But little by Little its all coming back
Like layers of an onion
That held me tightly wrapped

Bits and pieces of my memory
That were hidden away in code
Deep within my mind a door was closed
I?ve reached in to remember because my life is now in jeopardy

All the emotional and sexual abuse that I closed off to survive
Has been staring at me sabotaging my life
This life is not what I have dreamed and I am dying inside
And if I don?t face the truth of what was done to me 

Then I will surely become the monster that I despise
And as the tears bellow up
I again take another breath
Like soot in a fireplace and a hair ball in a cat

I cough up the toxic memories
As images flash through my mind
With my face in the toilet I begin to cry
My body begins to stiffen as nausea rises to the top

I then begin to wail from deep in my chest
It?s a hideous cry that sends chills down my spine
As I grit my teeth and hang on for dear life
A thought runs through my mind why.. why.. why.. why.

I?m tired of the black outs
I?m tired of the fear
I?m tired of the loneliness that have held me prisoner here
I?m tired of the pain and suffering that has come in my parents name

I?m tired of all the trauma and I?m tired of all the drama
I?m tired of the neglect that?s been perpetrated on my soul
Keep your hands off of me, keep your beliefs away from me
From all the mental abuse and all the negative remarks
And you still don?t see how you?ve damaged my sensitive heart
 
I?m tired of hearing all the denial
I?m tired of hearing how there is nothing wrong with you
I?m tired of you blaming everyone else but you
I?m tired of hearing how you hate this and you hate that

I?ve tried for years to heal this wound
But it seems to have spread to my nephew too
I don?t know what else to do
I even ruined my only serious relationship to get revenge

In my mind I justified their crime 
From all the bad advice and all the dysfunctional decisions
And I thought I was reversing everything 
When I vowed never to get married and have kids
But that sabotaging act has done me more damage 



Details | Couplet | |

MY BEST BAD CHOICE poetry contest ADULTERY

        MY BEST BAD CHOICE

Was a time --not long ago
When you begged me sweet and low

“Cast your net upon the sea
Quickly,darling, marry me!”

My heart caught 
and in a minute
My life was soup
And I was in it

A fair eyed man means dangerous shores
& I'm adrift-- mid rocks galore

On a current, flashing fins
You cast your line--
And hook sweet sins

And, at work you cannot think
When fishy eyes blink out a wink

Even friends are not off limits
When tides wash in the vodka gimlets

Do I hate you, yes, I could
Do I hate you, no, I should

A straying man on marriage seas
Navigates adulteries

When asked to re-chart his course
He usually stomps and screams “divorce”

MORAL 1:

Mixing metaphors and such
Keeps the critics out of ruts

MORAL 2:

Straying husbands/shagging rabbits
Cannot/willnot change their habits.




Victoria Anderson-Throop
Oct 10, 2012


Details | I do not know? | |

Reality

Bitterness sufficiently in my soul
Lack of tolerance for ignorance, and ineptitude
Self-centered in nature uncovers hidden ulterior motives
A sad reality for the world
Lack of trust
Lack of Honesty
Lack of Genuine kindness
How do we survive?
Should we have faith when deception and misrepresentation are everywhere?
Can we overcome doubt and disbelief in the human race?
Without a glimmer of hopefulness
Who knows what the future will bring?


Details | Lyric | |

In the Spider's Web

I am a spider
amused that you have become ensnared
in my web of lies.
My talent is manipulation-
I play you as easily as a puppet
dangling from my power hungry fingers.
Hungry, yes-
I feed off these lies.
The quicker you fall, 
the more satisfaction I feel.
I am a spider
and you are my pray.
You do not realize you are a victim
until you are bound and broken
my teeth at your neck,
How foolish do you feel 
as the venom courses through your veins?
Does this make me a monster,
Nothing more than a barbaric creature?
Relying on primal instincts,
I hunt for facts
and gather the truths,
smuggling them away 
and replacing them with 
Picture-perfect facsimiles engulfed in deceit.
Have I performed the greatest trick of all?
Or have I lost myself in my web?
Each fragile strand threatens to snap,
to unravel my illusion
and reveal the truth masked within,
leaving me exposed,
vulnerable and naked.
I have lost myself:
A victim of my own design.


Details | Verse | |

To the liers

To the liers who were
Great artists, manipulators,
Perfect friends and honest lovers...

To the liers who were
Talkative and silent,
Kind and sweet,
Walking out many miles
Pretending they carried
Love and trust...

To the liers I speak.

You are there still believing
In your goodness, and you are proud
Of yourselves.
But how sweet and true do you
Look before the God's eyes?
Have you ever thought about?


Details | Rhyme | |

Greek philosophy after Heraclitus - Continued in Verse - with the Pluralists

THE PLURALISTS : Empedocles & Anaxagoras

That single primary substance the ‘arche’ of
the Ionian philosophers ,
Was challenged by Emphedocles (b.495BC)
and Anaxagoras(b.500BC) !
Emphedocles spoke of four qualitative elements
of Nature ;
As Earth , Air , Fire and Water !
And also of two mythical beings - love and hate ;
Which caused all elements to unite , or to
separate and break !
Therefore they were called ‘Pluralists’, -
Since for them only a single primary substance , -
did not exist !

This above position was refuted by Anaxagoras ,
Who claimed these elements were not merely
four , 
But they were countless in number and many 
more !
It was neither love or hate but ‘nous’ , -
a spontaneous active mind ;
Was the source of all movements and life 
of Mankind !

THE ATOMISTS :
Little is known about the Father of the
School of Atomist called Leucippus ,
He was made famous by his pupil Democritus !
For him Parminedes’ non-being void did never 
exist ;
And Democritus spoke of atoms as indivisible
spatial entities ;
Moving in a void or empty space , as the building
stones of reality , -
Which led to the formation of different objects
and its multiplicity !
Just like the comedies and tragedies of those
days , -
Were composed of the same letters of the alphabets , -
Democritus had said .
He was a rationalist and maintained , all genuine
way of knowledge began , -
When sense perception ends !
For sense perception was obscure knowledge ;
And thoughts which transcends sense perception
and appearance ,
Reaching the very atoms in our being ,
Becomes the only genuine knowledge of human
beings !
But these philosophical thoughts only marked
a beginning !

THE SOPHISTS (481- 411BC) :
They were wise and skilful men of Greek history,
Lectured on art, rhetoric and oratory .
Also trained young men for political life ,
Were like intellectual mercenaries of their time ;
For all their teaching came at a price !
Beyond the reach of ordinary men ,
Which made Socrates later criticize them !

There chief exponent was Protagoras ,
Who had emphasized amongst all other things , -
‘Man as the measure of all things !’
But those Sophist had failed to see, the forest 
for the trees !
They failed to recognize ‘man’ from ‘men’ ,
While exaggerating the differences in human 
judgments ;
Ignoring the common areas of agreements !
(To be continued)


Details | I do not know? | |

The Scars You Left Me

to those of you have left scars on my heart that i felt the need to have them reflected on my skin
if it wasn't for you, i would have grown up normal, how boring
i would have had friends that lasted for more than a year
and i would probably be happy
but where's the fun in that?
you see, because of you I realized how awful i was. i decided not to be awful anymore and set out to fix myself, make myself more likable
if others liked me, maybe i could like myself
but no. no one will like me, the chameleon
i can switch from quiet to loud in 4 seconds
what an amazing talent, right?
why be myself when i can constantly mold myself to others likings, so they don't hate me
im incredibly lucky to have had the privilege of my life destroyed by you, without you even knowing
you can make your jokes, you can tell your white lies
you can even try to apologize but its too late
the damage is done, left permanently in scars


Details | I do not know? | |

The Cowardice of the Taliban and The Silence of The Good Muslims

The Cowardice of the Taliban and The Silence of The Good Muslims.


When hot lead tears the flesh of a 14 year old girl,

ripping through her skull,
leaving her to bleed out and die,

does Allah not recoil in horror,

to see His child whimper,
to see His daughter cry.

Where is the indignation,

the anger that often boils over and manifests itself as flags and books and videos are burnt in mass orgies of hollow piety,

where are the voices that scream so loud,
that denounce all but their own creed,

where are the men, the impotent men who crave for nothing more than their fascist egos to feed,

where are the voices that so loudly proclaim,
enemies here and enemies there, always quick to condemn,

where are those voices when the enemy walks amongst them.

14 year old Malala Yousafzai was shot in cold blood,

her crime?

Advocating the rights of girls to an education.

Shame on you, men of bigotry and men of cowardice.

Shame on you, silent and mute accomplices in this carnage.

Shame on me,
for my inaction,

Shame on us all,
who proclaim lofty ideals,

yet are conspicuously silent,

when a 14 year old girl is shot in the head,

by fascist fundamentalist bigots who only worship bullets of hot lead.

Not in my name!

Not in my name,
shall the cowardly men rain down abuse,

Not in my name,
shall the bigoted men light the communalistic fuse,

Not in my name,
shall Malala Yousafzai be shot in the head,

left to bleed out,
while countless mothers' tears are shed,

not in my name,
shall religious murderers,
be left to wander free,

not in my name,
for I dare all believers to open their eyes,
to see!

To see,
the innocence of a 14 year old girl,
wanting only an education,

as the men of the cloth,
prance around with their pathetic self-righteous indignation.

I write this today,
the anger raging in my veins,

yet I fear,

that I shall write more of this,

unless we stand up and say 'no more',

I fear that I shall be writing this again,

until we all,

reclaim the true principles of humaneness,

until we silence the voices of bigotry,
of rage,
of fanatical insanity,

I fear I shall be writing this again,

and,

until the muck-ridden bile,
is not excised,

I shall continue to say,

NOT IN MY NAME!

Or else I shall have nothing,

but my unending shame.



(for Malala Yousafzai, 14 years old, in a critical condition after being shot in the head by the Pakistani Taliban, for her work as a young activist advocating the rights of girls to attend school)


Details | ABC | |

Someone Elses Life

I feel like I'm living someone elses life, a life in strife. I've been strong, but when will I belong. I feel so alone, but I'm doing ok on my own. I can't describe the pain, but I keep in mind every storm runs outa rain. I use to think our love was unbeatable, but really its unforgettable. Everyday I walk down memory lane, trying to ignore the pain. He crosses my mind everyday, when will all this go away. There's gotta be something more, my heart is becoming sore. My momma doesn't have to worry, because I'm not sorry. I know he made the mistake, and he's the reason I have this heartache. What we had, was bad. I shouldn't have let it go that far, your just another scar.


Details | Free verse | |

Her Final Words

"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one. 
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Her sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed. 
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent. 
A meager thought 
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
Her curse.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows, 
"Save them."


Details | I do not know? | |

teens life in Oakland

*A assignment was due in class. *

Every time a gun shoots
A tree looses its roots
Every time there is bloodshed
Along with it millions of tears are shed
Every time a heart is stabbed
Someone else’s life gets barren
As violence grows
Many more mothers moan
The sounds of destruction
Overpowers the voice of those
Who are innocent
Who suffer with no reason
Who beg for life
Who have heart full of innocence

Why do so much violence?
That the child’s cry cannot be heard
When his father is killed
Why do so much violence?
That a mother moans
Over her child’s dead remains
Why do so much violence
For winning any stupid battle
Which is taking lives
Of people who have wives
And mothers and children

When you can keep calm
Talk things out
Do whatever you can
To keep violence out
Because there is no sin as big as
VIOLENCE


Details | Rhyme | |

Scars Left Behind

Fear, Terror, Agony then darkness
This night I will never forget 
You ruined my life, you hurt me so bad
You left my life in ruins; you bruised me black and blue
Now I hate you with a vengeance, because you 
Chose to sexually assault me on this very night
Your strength to great, your body so large,
I could not move an inch, I was pinned down hard.

Ripped blouse, skirt torn, no buttons left on at all
Begging you to stop you just went on telling me to shut up
Your evil sperm had entered into my body so pure
Without listening to my pleas, you ignored my cries of pain
You had one thing on your mind, to get inside of me.
I prayed to God give me strength to get me through that night.
After you had done your worst, and glared as if you’d won
You drove me home after that, nothing was said again.


I’d hoped that some way, someday that you would be hurt back
Or maybe even worse, because of what you did to me 
Would forever be a reminder of the agony I felt that night.
Feeling sick after a few weeks, the Doctor told me the worst
I was eight weeks along, he expected me to be pleased, 
As he consoled me, I sobbed out my sad tale about that night
He'd told me to  report you, I said,” I can’t do that he’s my boss.
He’d say that it was consensual and deny it, if I said a thing.”
 
Now you know why I hate this man so much
He stole my innocence before I was ready to let it go
I hope someday that he will pay for this hateful evil thing
I pray by now that he has paid for all my pain and grief.
If someone had the misfortune of having this same fate
My heart goes out to all of you, for all the men you must hate
Hopefully by now your wounds are healed or healing has begun
In addition, you’re filling your life like me now, with lots of love and fun.

By Beauty28


Details | I do not know? | |

A Reflection Of You

I know your miserable 
I'm a reflection of you 
I know the wanting and needing 
There are times of wanting the screaming 
I hate how you act toward me 
I know you see what I see 
I look in the mirror and see you 
This is a reflection,A reflection so true 
Our hearts sealed up 
Points in our life we gave up 
There are things we used to hide 
Just because we have our pride 
Feelings were never to be shown 
I came out the only way I've known 
We have a little girl inside 
We both hate when she starts to cry 
This is a reflection I see 
Yeah with the way we fight it's hard to believe 
We feel the same pain 
Just too much pride to maintain 
Mom you know as well as I do 
I'm a reflection, A reflection of truth


Details | Free verse | |

Who I used to be

I hate myself for letting go
For losing my light
For giving up hope
For letting my faith fade

I hate myself for letting others down
Knowing I’ve disappointed 
Knowing I let myself down
But most of all letting God down

I hate hearing of who I used to be
I hate remembering of who I used to be
I hate wondering if I can ever get it back

I hate that people can see
See the twinkle gone
See the real smile gone
See someone who was once this amazing Godly woman
Is now……this…..

I hate being asked about church
It reminds me how I’ve been hurt
How I loved and never judged
How I needed them and no one was there
How the things they said cut me so deep
How people who I thought loved me
Only loved the idea of me

I felt everything I did
The love I gave
My heart I gave
Everyone turned the other way
They left me alone
God left me alone
To trek through this muddy mess

I’ve been snagged
Cut
Beaten
Fallen down
I’m not as clean as I once was
I’m tattered and torn
I may not shine as bright
Or smile as much
But I’m still marching on
With or without anyone
I trek on


Details | Free verse | |

Africa III

Heart pounding
Nervous feeling
Overwhelming
Deep breath to shake it
Cold chill slivers down fast

Beating against cage of heart
Cage of body
Cage of soul
Legs begging to run
Heart aching to be free
Truth to self 
aching to be seen

Sweet scent of dry savannah plains
Sharp smell of thorny veins
The aroma of Africa surrounds
Scents sights sounds 
In these home is found

Frustration mounts 
Captured leopard
Bound

Snarling at every motion made
Scared but defiant
Blinded by fear and rage

Paws long for endless journeys
On paths walked centuries ago
For elegance in element
A space all her own
Where earth still bleeds red on horizon
Morning and night
Continuing the endless fight

Fight for borderless freedom
Everlasting sight
The pale yellow green eyes
Dismays the truth inside
But tell the story
Of wild soul
Story to unfold


Details | I do not know? | |

Weep and a Moan

Watching the sequence of sound coming out of your mouth...
But the screaming is too loud.
I can speak,
But my brain doesn't want to.

I closed the door.
Silence called for me.
Should I cry or should I run after her?

What have I done to you?
but love you uncontrollably.

Shes then left speechless.
It looks like shes out of breath,
but really I broke her.

She was fragile.
So innocent.

Run, Just run.
A gun raised..
up to her mouth.
And a taint on her heart.


Details | I do not know? | |

I Hate You Like*

I hate you like the Eclipse of the sun and moon====== 
Lightning, thunder, twisters,and Hurricane # 7 destruction upon my hate====

I hate you like the father who walked out on us======
Hating you is the only way we can relate========== 
Fire, burn, heat , and smoke, igniting the hate in flames=== 

I hate you like the lion who can't wait to devour his prey===== 
I hate you like ivy with poison to irritate ===============
I hate you indeed, deeper than the abyss in space=========
Black, ebony, coal, and darkness you fell in my pit of hate==== 

I hate you and dispise all your living ways==========
I hate you because I want to==========
I hate you and nothing compares================ 
I hate the living guts out of you ================ 

*Written by: P.D. as a request from me (an opposition to my original poem: I Love You 
Like)...thank you P.D. for your awesome talent
 



Details | Light Poetry | |

Why Hate

you don't like him because he is caucasin
 she hate him because he's black
 they look down on them because they are Asian 
we are afraid of them because they are from Iraq
 
as humans we can be so mean 
do you really think you can get into heaven that way
 tell me ! how can you love the lord who you've never seen
 and have so much hate for someone you see everyday
 
this has gone on since way back when 
racism is still alive 
someone has always hated someone for the skin they were in
 so how do we expect to survive
 
if we don't try  to erase the hate 
our families will never be united
 for we have already sealed our fate 
as long as our brothers and sisters are divided
 


Details | Bio | |

Second Chance at love or just forget it

Can this only be the begining of love,
He was perfect in my eyes,
 before he wanted me to change,
whether it was my body or my looks,
 or even the style of my clothes,
 I was too young, 
to realize that he only wanted me 
for one thing
and one thing only,
 and that was to satisfy his lust for the flesh,
But i still loved him,
Even through the betrayal of finding him with a bestfriend,
Who was suppose to never betrayed me,
Even through sacred oatrhes declared since a young age.
 I did not need this misery in my life but i continued to love him,
Until one day I decided to give up on love itself.
I grown cold ,and so distant,
I did not socialize and I had become the outcast in Highschool.
No one wants to date a girl weho is cold remote and distant,
I am bound and determined to find the right lover in my life,
But  who can i ask advice for who is truely my friend 
and will not betray me 
the way my own bestfriend did!!


Details | Didactic | |

READY TO FIGHT

before many of us chose to walk on a sanctified journey in life
we were always frustrated, discombobulated and looking for a fight
the kind of fight that was fueled by jealousy, pettiness, anger and/or greed
but now as disciples of Christ we fight for honor, a cause or a need
no longer do we fight using profanity, knives, fists or guns
we now fight with weapons that are spiritual ones
we no longer look for excuses not to get involved with a cause
we no longer allow the hopeless opinions of others to make us stop and pause
if you can't help just don't hinder and don't hurt those who are ready to fight
get out of the way and allow God's people to do what is good and right

when those of us who share a common pain are more than willing to lend a hand
that's when you encounter the haters who will try to impede your plans
hate is that emotion that everyone has experienced at least once in life
hate is a demonic spirit that does nothing but cause havoc and strife
hate is within each of us but we all don't let it manifest
for as true children of the most high God we know that we are blessed
hate comes from that inner fear caused by not being in the know
but you can't allow fear to turn into hate just let the God in you now show
for fear can paralyze, it can traumatize, fear can make you become paranoid
fear can make you ill, it can take away your will and make you null and void

we know that as disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ
everyday we are in the fight of our lives
as the devil will try to intercede and give you a short term loss of memory
so make sure you pray everyday to be reminded of the God who gave life to thee
for God can take that hate and turn it into kindness
God can take that fear and render it spineless
God gave you the power to fight for what you believe
God gave you the ability to fight for what you can achieve
so are you ready to fight in order to be set free?
are you ready to fight for a cause and your family?

Nehemiah and his men attempted to rebuild those torn down walls
when the haters came around hoping they would stumble and fall
but the Spirit revealed to them what the haters had planned
so Nehemiah and his men were ready and prepared to take their stand
they were ready to fight to protect and defend those walls
they were ready to fight so that their work would not be stalled
ready to fight, ready to fight for righteous cause
no time to ponder, nor procrastinate and no time to stop and pause 



Details | I do not know? | |

Goodbye

I pray one day for happiness.
I pray one day for peace.
I pray one day I'm left alone
and this pain will finally cease.

Don't hate me because I'm different.
Don't hate me for having love.
Don't hate the fact that I know GOD
is guiding me from above.

I wish you knew my pleasures.
I wish you knew my pain.
I wish you knew how hard I try 
to let the love remain.

Maybe we will never
see things eye to eye.
But hate will only cause more pain.
So let's just say GOODBYE.


Details | Rhyme | |

Promises

As she held her pretty little friend
She promised it was not the end
Nine little wounds decorate her wrist
Nine little wounds that want to be kissed
One self hating girl took her last shove
One self hating girl that wants to feel love
The pretty little razor held in her hand
Can decide when this pain will end
The pretty little razor touches her ivory skin
Making her nine little wounds now ten
She cries out in pain with each touch
Only because she hates herself too much
One by one ten turns to twenty
She looks down and thinks she has plenty
She looks in the mirror and still hates what she sees
She looks in the mirror and she sees me
She cries when she sees the fat on her bones
She hates how much she's grown
How much bigger she keeps getting
How nothing seems to be fitting
She just wants to be perfect
She just wants the respect
That every thin girl gets
For having visible hips
She wipes away the tears
She hides all of her fears
She puts on that smile 
That will last her awhile
She tucks away the pretty little razor
She promises it's not the last it will see her
She tucks it away
Just like its another day
The smile she must maintain
To hide her everyday pain


Details | Free verse | |

Pushing the Edge

I helplessly indulge myself with so much hate I could even puke
My hands tremble as I hold the phone against my ear
I push the right buttons and wait for the ring to go off
It feels like forever because you never want to answer

I could hear the heavens screaming this overwhelming hatred inside
The fires of hell burns a reflection in my own eyes
Do you need me to spell it out to put some sense in you?
I hate you and everything we do

Love was such a wonderful feeling for innocence
And yet this tainted heart of mine can no longer pretend
I took a deep dive into the unknown when I got burnt
Your lies destroy everything beautiful in my world

My eyes drown in a turbulent flow of hot tears
I should taste your blood to conquer all the misery
I can no longer utter sweetness to your ears
We are one reality I bite with remorse

You make me scribble all the wrong things
You push everything to the edge
You make me want to suffocate my breath
And yet you are still the love of my life.


Details | Couplet | |

Matter of Choice

some may pray
others stray

believe as you wish
life is the main dish

you may even hate me
just don’t hang me from tree

how we live is our choice
you may hear your god’s voice

live and let live that’s my life
see you in the afterlife


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Emotional Hole

I did not find myself to be so important
So I ask my friends do I seem distant?
When I ask the question I had received an answer, Yes
So I think that made it clear that I had been not the best
I am a friend of a friend that talks so many things
That friend talks to much it is insane and insanity it brings
I do care, about my friends they are all good people
They tend to stand on their high steeple 
Today I find myself not so aware
Disbanding my fear of regret and care
Walking many different paths I see that I have found holes
It is the path that people choose to use to fuel their rage with coals
Coals are partially burnt wood or fossils a piece of fuel
It is the source of burden and fire a rage of emotions that stands cruel
It can be warm and caring, but it also can be baring
I just start to feel so low, below the ground I keep on staring
I reach for my friends so many times I feel so ignorant at times
Just once I feel I should not rely on them when feeling I can not find 
I dig my hole deeper and I can not climb out
For some reason I am just full of doubt
I care about so many things and what I have is confusion
One person should be all I should think about to get out of that illusion
My battle in my heart and mind is not at all so pleasant
I feel so alone in an island that is shaped like a crescent
My emotions is like coinciding with a diameter of the semicircle
Not a full emotion that is complete like a circle
My feelings is circular full of incomplete thoughts, so much deeper
I feel it will wake up my evil half a evil soul that is a sleeper
What question should I ask myself? to believe that I am not so alone
As I feel like a person who is deteriorating to the bone
I ask my friends the same question once again
I figure I should do it, to know what kind of feelings I should end
So many thoughts that come out of my feeling
I feel like my friends take, an emotional trauma of stealing
They ask me questions and I answer theirs
But when I need mine answered I feel burning inside like a flare
Are they even friends when they do not take me serious in anyway
Just put me in my hole cause I feel nothing in their will be getting in my way
It's just so simple to answer someones problem
I answer friends with beauty of a rose, but when they answer mine I get the stem
I know the stem is very important in life, with out it how can a rose be a rose
With a hole to put the root and stem in how can it grow
The words we speak I guess is like all natural things we reap and sow


Details | Free verse | |

WHAT MAKES YOU HATE ME LIKE THIS

What did i ever done wrong
To make you hate me like this
What did i ever take from you
To make you hate me like this
What did i ever tell you or say
To you, that have offend you
To make you hate me like this

Is it that there’s something 
I have that you don’t
That makes you hate me like this
Is it there’s something i’ve done
Better than you
That makes you hate me like this
Is it my appearance, my skin colour
Or my ways
That makes you hateme like this

Why did you choose to be my enemy
Why did you choose to become an obstacle 
In my path
Why don’t you let me live my life 
In peace
Why you always ruined everything for me
Why you’re selling rumors about me
Why you tell lies on me
Tell me what will you want me to do
To pay for your hatrid
What will you want me to do
To let me live my life in peace 


Details | Rhyme | |

The Breakdown

Kill me now,
no one needs to know how.
They don't care anyways,
let me waste away.

I'm so alone,
I'm always on my own.
I was happy one minute,
now I want to cut.

I'm trying to stay strong,
but it's been too long.
I'm giving up,
since no one is helping me up.

I'm falling down,
and there's no one around 
to keep me sane,
so all I want is pain.


Details | Lyric | |

Thin Line

Thin Line 


You hate me when i am around you 
you hate me when i am away
if hating thrives you everyday
i am your energy and 
your medicine at your need
when you gossip for your play.

Poetry 5/18/12 by  Keith K. Relf


Details | Rhyme | |

Are We Trying to Remove God From Everything


 UNSUPPORTED CODE We often hear this topic across our nation.
Another person crying; “discrimination.”

In our many attempts to not discriminate.
It seems like it’s God that we seek to eliminate.

It seems like we’ve come up with our own “rules.”
And somehow have turned into a bunch of “fools.”

We accept many perversions of various kinds…
But God himself?  We seem to close our minds!

In many of our lives,  we’ve “kicked “ him out.
And refuse what he really is about!

The words, “In God we trust...”  Our money bears it!
Anything of God?  We’re afraid to share it!

It seems like the courts almost say he doesn’t exist!
And have brought much confusion into our midst!

As many say it’s “offensive” to display a cross…
Many godly values have already been lost!

It’s time to wake up America!  And begin to see!
The kind of country we’re beginning to be!

A country that’s foundation is getting off course.
Being driven by a wicked and ungodly force!

Out only hope is in God!  And him alone!
We must invite him back into our homes!

To God and his word we must hold secure and fast!
He is our only hope that our country will last!


By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

Please Come Back

I'm sorry for all the horrible things I have said,
I'm sorry for all the bad things I have done,
I'm glad to havve you as my best friend again,
I was sad, depressed, and desperate to hear you voice, and,
Talk to you again.

Oh Caleb, I cannot tell you,
How happy I was, happy to finally,
Talk to you after months,
You will always be my best friend no matter what,
You know that I will always be here for you,
I miss you a lot, why oh why must you live,
So far away?

Why do you live in Illinois,
Why did you leave me,
Why did you go away and not come back?
Caleb, please come back real soon, we all miss you,
But I miss you the most.
You are my best friend,
And I am here to stay.

I will never let you down,
Never put you down,
Never will I forget about you,
I will never hate you,
It is impossible,
It is impossible, because you picked,
Me up when I was down, you
Were always there for me, and you still are,
You never let me down, and you never called me names,
You Never let me be sad, and it was amazing,
To have such a good friend around,
So why, why did you move away?

I know it was for your protection,
I know you had to get out of that horrible place,
That horrible dark place,
Oh how bad I wanted to beat them for beating you,
You did not deserve that, and I hate that image,
Noone deserves to be treated that way; I don't care,
Who they are.

Caleb thank you for being my friend again,
And forgiving me, and for always being here for me,
May I ask one little favor of you?
PLEASE COME BACK??????????
Always~N~Forever,
Briana Lynn Palmer
06-17-12
Dedicated To: CAZ


Details | Blank verse | |

As The Other Me Takes Over

Society is a reason that has just ran cold,
Like the tempature I'm feeling never seems to get ahold,
The sadness lingers over and the beauty starts to fade,
When I saw all the negative on the news today,
The darkness that is surrounding me has found a new home,
Deep inside my brain it swells trying to kill the bold,
The new found confidence I had seems to have been old,
Like the old man with the cancer that has just got told,
I know he's still with me in my heart and in my soul,
but I just can't stand what this new year has to hold,
Will it be good for me, will I see, 
All the positive, when will the demons stop to breathe?
There like vultures in my body, I can feel them feed,
All this happiness that I held, were they just a dream?
I've found a medicene that will kill the pain, of the hurt I share,
Your pain it scars me like a knife cutting threw the care,
The worry of this generation is not what it should be,
But I was left with a gift, I'm lucky too be me.
Can I be the light, In the darkness?
Can I bare the stake running threw your lungs,
Can I be the air that you breathe when the whole worlds died,
Can I be the tears in the midst of happiness you cried?
 
Please love me now and in return I'll make your life worth while,
and you won't know what is hurt, I'll heal your wounds and take you from your life,
Give you a new start and I'll set things right,
I see the innocense in a noose every single night,
I wish I could pick them off the rope so high,
What would drive them too that point,
I regret the days I spent,
Being so unhappy in the life I live,
I'm trying to be proud in a world where it's scarase,
Where children have no parents,
Where the government is only but single Tyrants,
So make my job easy and give me the knife,
That will kill these lunatics that crave the night,
That don't do whats right,
I will train in the darkness where I'm the only light,
I will rid the world of there parrell and strife.
Please god just save me tonight.


Details | Free verse | |

Him And Her

Smile! Click! 
She poses for a picture
Hands entwined in his, 
Faces bumping together, hearts connecting beyond embraces
She knows he’s hers and she’s his
In her dreams- in her deepest wishes
Screams! She screams as she jumps
Didn’t even look but plunged right into love
She said ‘It wasn’t my fault’ 
But a guilty burn stabs her
Ouch! That’s it! 
Just pretend that you haven’t thought a million times about him
Oh yeah! All those poems you wrote, daydreaming, -
Fine! She shuts up the voices
So what? He’s the best of every girl’s choices
He’ll never boast but smiles innocently
Every time she wants to hate him
His beautiful brown eyes catch hers
Poof! Hate disappears
A rush of that feeling called love reappears
She lives a fairytale with him
In imaginary land
Smiling on the outside
Snatching a glimpse as he walks by
Hah! She sighs!
Surely, one day, he’ll be mine!


Details | Rhyme | |

Sky-Falling Gold

Some complain of snow

Some complain of the cold

But what falls from the sky

Is much more golden than gold

Blessings from the sky

Yet we turn a blind eye

We instead express our disgust

When we could turn our sins into dust

We could pray to alleviate someone’s pain

But instead we scowl and frown on that rain

We could thank God instead of making a fuss

(It’s not like He’s throwing rocks down at us!)

A time to be grateful,

Yet we just complain

We could be making precious du’aa

For major beneficial gain

But it’s easier to grumble

Roll your eyes and shake your head

You may regret not taking advantage of this

When you’re long gone and dead

Don’t delay being

Grateful to your Lord

Let your heart live out

The ‘alhamdulileh’ word.


Details | Rhyme | |

What You Really Don't Like Me

What?  You Really Don’t Like Me?

Is there something about me,
 that you don’t like?
If you seen me today…
Would you want me to “take a hike?”

Perhaps it’s my personality,
 or a habit of mine.
You can’t stop talking about me,
much of the time.

Pointing out my faults to some
 of the people you know…
The words you say are actually
 eating at your soul!

Instead of loving me, the way
 God wants you to…
You bring up things about m,
 you’re not supposed to do!

Have you ever just once,
took the time to pray for me?
Am I someone you want to be with
for eternity?

STOP! And think about the damage
 you’ve already done!
Begin to pour out your heart
 to Jesus, God’s son!

May he help you to really LOVE me
 the way he does!
The cross he bore was for you and I…
Whom he loves!

May your thoughts about me,
make your heavenly father proud!
I hope to see you as we meet Jesus one day…
In the clouds!

By Jim Pemberton


Details | ABC | |

Sometimes I Like To Pretend Things Never Came To A End

Sometimes I like to pretend, things never came to a end. But over time, our love became a crime. I didn't know what we had, would ever end so bad. But then I knew things weren't right, when we started to fight. Now I walk down memory lane all the time, the pain is worst then committing a crime. We only caused eachother pain, but we were eachothers maine. I thought things would be alright, but I cried alot that night. I don't want things to change, without you my life is strange. You said you wanted me so much it started to hurt that you couldn't wait, now im just another person you hate. When you said you didn't care, I knew the person I loved was no longer there. You aren't the same, the new you is lame. We both fell, now it's hell. You use to always be here for me, like family. But now your nowhere in sight, things aren't right. Empty is all that I can feel, I still can't believe this is real. I didn't mean to let you get away, I didn't know what to say. Am i with the right guy, or am i telling myself a lie. I was afraid to loose what we had, but to you that choice was bad.


Details | Rhyme | |

Be Her

You see her?
Why don't go be like her?
No one likes you,
so this is what you must do.

You must stop being yourself,
get off of you shelf.
You must please everyone,
to do that, you must be number one.

She's the perfect girl,
you're the no one in the world.
So go ahead, and give yourself away,
since you're going the wrong way.

You are no longer you,
see what you can do.
You are now her,
that's better than what you ever were.


Details | Verse | |

Crying out

Crying out loud,
Crying for no reason,
A girl without future,
A girl stuck in the prison.

Where dreams are coming out?
When they take her dreams away?
A girl without future,
A girl without desire.

How many things are missed?
How many words are left unsaid?
A girl is crying out,
A girl stuck in the world.

Where is an explanation?
Where is a hero?
Is it fine now when
Girls within are still believers
But outside they hate
Every detail and season
Hidden in the eyes of men?


Details | I do not know? | |

Existence

Once upon a time in the history of the past was born  into existence an evilness 
that would last, through generations to the end of time brought forth to man every 
imaginable crime. from the earth without form or void ,came the demons a sickness
 the paranoid.
  First came the demon temptation it grew fast across the unborn nations
then came death and hate ,nothing left for negotiation then lust and fornication 
raping the planet before life began ,the ultimate sinner was born a man.
Who created man, and what the hell is lust out from the heavens blew the wind and 
dust and there things are and what should be ,he who gave us the air was hung on 
a tree.
 they say he's the savior ,the savior of what ? and why would you save us from the 
things that we got, man is the demon created for sin, and when this life is over our 
death will began,
And then we will see what's good is not ,the life we have chosen, and we all have a 
lot of things that aren't true it all was a lie, we've all tried to live but for sin we will 
die
It does not matter what happened in the garden of Eden,we were created for sin 
hate and bleedin.
It now does not matter who beggat who ,were all goin to hell this much is true ,
  so hate who you want and love what you will, your as good as puppet just 
needing a thrill,  the past is history the future a bler life is for living 
              but death is for sure ..................................
                                                        James............................................................


Details | Bio | |

In my head

This is not a perfect story, its a feeling that i just want to share with you. I need HELP

The love i show to everyone in my surrounding, its just rediculous the way have trained myself to become or should i just say its my character thats how i am. I hate it when i cry for nothing, its just that i cant get it, do i have to be perfect to earn something in life. Am a good dancer, a good writer as well as a good person, but what have i earned in these living nothing absolutly nothig. Have plied myself to be thee who loves all and never attempt to hate any even thoes who have shown me hatred. Deep in me i feel the agony something somewhere in my daily living is not satisfied have allow my instincts to believe that its just the human strategy we are never satisfied and can never truly and pratically be satisfied, but in my case its a bit different. I miss love, looking at the whole situation properly i cant tell who loves me and who really hates me devastating anomly. The history of my life carries untold stories within its path, i dont even know who truly i am. One thing that am very sure of is that i am always there for thoes whom i feel am bound to be there for although i could be somewhere else. In tears i sometimes sit to ask why, why do i have to be these way. Am so mean to myself as the ones am so hardly trying to be a help of, at a moment i hate myself so much that i dont want to exsist anymore, i wish to be another somebody of somewhere. Just because i couldnt once make it right to the ones i feel bound to help. I am a lost soul screaming loud for attention at some point i can explode if i could, there is such much going on in my head i have issues that i want to talk about things that i just cant keep to myself. Thanks to writing i can state it down. This is a rapid that have ever since search to write about about but i  just could figure it out. I really cant tell weather my own mother loves to talk less of my dad or my boyfriend. My motto, never have up the fight for love, deep inside me am gone, empty and lost, but in my heart i know i can make things happen and watch myself work wonders i believe that. It might be hard to understand if you cant feel what am feeling in me but am completely lost. Do i even have talents? i dont know i have no idea, what i think is am just that loser that dont want to accept her destiny. There is nothing i repeat nothing in this world that cant be solved, my soul is longing for satisfaction love and nothing but the truth. The big thank you i always carry around in me goes to thee the almighty thee who created man from a thick clot of blood and gave hime life despite all what he know that would happen, who has given me the chance to live a life. Suddenly am starting to see life with a different eye than i normally used to as i am writing this,have just figured out life is me, i am my life its only me that can make myself feel just the right way i deserve to feel. Have made so many wrong dicisions, gone through so many hard ways that i could have actually safe myself from. Have given away my last penny to make another fellow feel happy and like me for thoes moments, have thrown my pride away to make a boy fall for my adventurious way, have hurt someones feeling to make another one like me, have done so many harm to myself and others. I just dont know where to head to sometimes i just feel like i should just kill myself and free my thoughts but then I always have this tiny voice in my head that always reminds me of Gods love and it works everytime, thats just what keeps me moving anytime i want to turn back. Have written a manuscript that carries living in it but its still in my laptop. At a certain point i thought putting down 28 pills in my tiny body could save by story, totally wrong thought am stronger than that.   SAVE MY STORY.

A Dream
What happens when you feel so lost, so devastated knowing that no one seems to be understanding your situation. When the whole world turns their backs on you, you feel empty, its a terrible feeling.

A Wish
Wanting to become a somebody to make a certain person in your life happy, a wish that appears not to becoming true, wanting to publish your first book at the age of 20 but you almost 20 and nothing.


Details | Free verse | |

Burn

It started with just a hint of smoke, 
A whiff that made the nostrils flare, 
But raised no alarm.
It was fanned by every little slight
And look
And broken promise
And critical word.

No one noticed
When it finally caught.
The smolder now a flame
Licking up the wall
Of our lives.
It was tame, 
Controllable.
Safe.

But it spread.
It snaked its way
Through each member
And no one seemed
To realize
How it rotted flesh
And poisoned air.

It blistered
And peeled way
Our dreams
Our hopes
Leaving scars
And immobility
In its wake.

Walking cadavers
In a gutted world.


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate the Calendar

I hate the calendar.
It hangs in the assumption
That something will happen.
Not that it should happen,
Or that it needs to happen,
But it will happen anyway,
No matter what I say.

I hate the calendar,
Not because I fear commitments,
But I despise the thought of obliging myself
To something that doesn’t pertain
To my present state.
Tomorrow can worry about itself;
I have enough on my mind today.

I hate the calendar.
Every day is another tilted red cross.
A vibrant intersection 
Of lifelines and deadlines;
Everything I can do
And how long I have to do it.

I most hate the calendar
Because it answers
The question of my mortality.
It screams from every corner
That old adage that now has a new meaning to me:
“Your days are numbered!”

I know I’ll die;
I don’t need a calendar to remind me.


Details | Light Poetry | |

Kindness is a Virtue

Who are and who is my friends or acquaintances, confusing everyday
but today I have found my self to walk a path that is not so rough
I became so blinded to have friends that it pains me anyway
They take a simple kindness and think that I am not tough
so by deliberately challenging me to act like nothing happens I grow bold
Wake up you! and all the rest, I have something to say
I don't like this feeling of regret or sorrow so please do not take me cold
as a friend you should know to not take advantage of my kindness in away
A storm is blowing inside my soul burning a hole in it so
lightning is striking in methods unknown for in the distance thunder you hear
Some of the greatest warriors fall with great weapons of bow
antics that slaughters such feebleness as cowardices use an unseen spear
To let one know that your feelings are clear do not hesitate
to do so shows fear and that is one thing that can determine your choice
With kindness in your corner you should easily win and that will be great!
In the end you can hold up a drink with friends and smile and rejoice


Details | Light Poetry | |

Will our world ever change

all man are born equal 
Its how god wants us to be 
and live in peace and harmony
for the goodness of  humanity
 
Adam and eve are our parents
And we are their children
So why are their so many wars
That seem to have no end

 We know there’re only one god
And he loves all of us
and yes  we see  people suffering 
but in god works we have to trust

we see  the holocaust in Europe 
the genocides in Africa
the inhumane captivity of Palestine
and mass murders in south America

and although our tears falls
like the rain from the skies
every time we see bombs falls
and parents holds their dead and cries

how did this world become so
why do people hate each other
if Adam and eve is our parents
are you  not sister and I’m your brother

today I’m preparing for thanks giving
last week I celebrated dewali
then will come seven nights of Hanukkah 
the same time I light my Christmas tree

then for holy month Ramadan
I keep fast for all most everyday
And give donations to the mosque
For the poor who comes to pray

Will our world ever change
Its what we hear all the time
When its full of hypocrites governments
Committing Genocides and hate crimes

But we all are so helpless
While we stands aside and look
But it’s the prophesies being fulfill
That is written in the holy book

But these things will come to past
Children having children
False prophets using Jesus name
Men marrying men

people flying like birds in the sky
 weapons of mass destructions
man bringing this world
on the brink of annihilations

some times I feel to stop writing
and close my eyes to what’s around me
but then I think of those without voice
that world forgets so easily

so if I throw away my pens
Comes like I turn my back their problems
Although I cant lead them out the dark
 I can shed some light on them


Details | Free verse | |

leave

life.... 
it seems to be some where
between heaven and hell...
love and hate....
living and dying...
who knows what to expect out of life
to some people everyday is a smile....
to others its a cry
me?
s@#t..
i don't give a f@#k anymore...
i really don't..
go ahead and yell and scream!
get in my face and curse!
tell me s@#t that may or may not be true!
send me away!
because i don't give a f@#k anymore!
i really don't
wether you love me..
or simply hate me...
doesn't matter to me anymore
i used to cry a bucketfull of tears at night
when daddy left...
i cried when i told you i hated you...
when we fuss and fight....
argue 
but now?
now im empty...
i just don't give a f@#k anymore
i have no more tears to shed....
no more smiles to give
....
....
if i ever did something wrong to make you hate me like this...
im sorry...
wether you believe me
or not....
im sorry...
im sorry
for everything i've done
today 
yesterday
a month ago...
maybe years ago...
im sorry...
.....
....
...i count the days till i leave...
leave here...
leave life...
just leave...


Details | Haiku | |

What Would You Do

What would you do if you knew this was my last day to live??
Would you try and save or let me go?
Would you even care for my soul?
What would you do if I was a fallen angel?
Would you still recognize me?
Would you talk to me or ignore me?
What would you do if I died?
Would you have a funeral for me, so all my friends & family could come?
Would you cry or even mourn a 'lil bit?
Would you care that I was gone, or would be happy?
What would you do if I was a ghost?
Would you feel me right beside you, guarding you, Watching over you, protecting you?
Would you see me?
Tell me would you walk all over me, or maybe even walk through me, as if I weren't there?
What would you do if I was a demon?
Would you still love me then?
Would you still care and forgive me?
Would you just say "You are stupid, and I hate you?"
What would you do if I were and angel?
Would you love me more, or would you love me less?
Would you feel me touch you, and comfort you when you need someone and you think noone is there for you, well that's a lie, cause I am right here beside you to catch you if you fall, to dry your tears, and to heal your wounds of any kind.
What would you do if I was still alive?
Would you continue to hate me, and call me sadistic names?
Would this world still be cruel?
Would there still be a rule?
What would you do?
Always~N~Forever,
Briana Lynn Palmer
Finished:08-07-11
9:42P.M.
age: 14


Details | Free verse | |

The Black Abyss

Sinking in deeper,
No way to escape,
The dark and scary Reaper,
Fore told in the Book of Life.

Is this my end?
Will I ever see the light of day again?
No. My wounds, I must mend.
I must find my strength.

Stand my ground,
Face my fears.
Only then will my voice be found
I must survive.

Break the suffocating chains,
Run from the darkness.
Power will fill my veins.
I will Fight!

Fight the painful names,
The horrid memories,
The demented games 
And escape My Black Abyss.


Details | Rhyme | |

Like, Love, Hate

I can like you 
Flirt like a bee
Keep it easy
Just being me
Tossing good vibes
Me to you
Nothing more
Tonight we're through

You can like me
Lay me a line
A compliment 
Would work just fine
Hoping that you will get more
Lost your chance
Walked out the door

I can love you
With all my heart
Expose myself
Not very smart
Open up and let you in
Let you taste 
The sweetest sin

You can love me 
Make me your dreams
Easy enough
Or so it seems
Give me your whole, everything
Make me need
What you can bring

I can hate you
Wish you to bleed
Holding a grudge
Let evil breed
Darkness fills what eyes can see
Send you harm
Make you just flee

You can hate me
Say words so mean 
Spew your  venom 
Heart drips unclean
No more light left in the room 
Stomped it down 
Let in the gloom

I like you
I love you
I hate you too
I cant live without you 
Now what do I do?


Details | Free verse | |

the truth about me

i hate looking at myself in the mirror
i hate knowing that i have fear
i hate seeing what isnt there
i hate hate feeling scared 
i hate believing what isnt true 
i hate believing and trusting you
cause deep inside i have a heart 
that has slowly been torn apart


Details | Verse | |

Hey Old Pal, Nice To See Nothing's Changed

Failure is a step up, when it comes to you.
Broken titles, whispered pasts.
No one's memories can last.

Tell me your pride, your secrets you hide.
Take a breath, open your eyes.
No one else could handle your lies.

Tied myself up again, looking around for a friend.
Remember when I looked to you?
Never thought the truth could be so, true.

Wrapped up in this tragically happy life of yours.
If you could be quiet for a moment, maybe you'd see.
You're all you'll ever let yourself amount to be.

It's a messed up world when you look out the window,
But take a look in the mirror,
Make your world a little more clear.

What's in front of your heart, holding the beat from the start.
Love and peace, hate and pain?
You think it all feels the same.

Success is a step down when it comes to you.
You waste no time, straight for the end.
Fairy tales don't tell you the ever after, because they can only end in failure.

Just step back for a moment, don't look to hard.
You'll hate to see that your life has started to rot.
Remove your eyes and see with your soul, failure is easy to spot.


Details | Free verse | |

My Hard Life

What to do?
When you know nobody likes you?
For a fact that is.
How do you cope with it?
I can't do it.
I hate my life.
It's so hard.
Nobody makes it easier.
I get help from nobody.
No friends, no neighbours,
Not even my family.
My life is a dangerous place,
that no one wants to be in,
I'm sure.
Sometimes I feel suicidal,
like tonight.
But i fight it and succeed.
It always works.
But now I can't sleep.
I wouldn't be able to at all.
I hate my life.
If no one wants me in this world,
then why am i still here?
Doesn't God know i hate it here?
Is it punishment for me or my mom?
Or is it for the both of us?
I don't know.
How can I find out?
I don't know,
God, I don't know,
I, honestly, don't know...
           xxx


Details | I do not know? | |

"Take Me To Hell"

I don't play god, i hate you all, a life made of lie i will slay today, nothing steps
ahead, i will decapitate satan for power, god if i must, i don't rules in a hole so dark,
i feel pain in my chest, so before i die i will destroy the world, more hate in me growing
so quick, my mother and father, hope to see you in hell, i'll settle up the score for
good, i love sins more than devil does, as a creator, i punish fear, blood runs deep, fear
runs deeper, love ain't here, not in me, never will, is like a fire inside my chest
punching the walls of my heart blazing, like a passion breaking, poison closed my eyes,
funny look towards the mirror look at all this devils besides me, i love this chain
holding me down, it actually challenge me to fight harder, take me to hell, let me see
satan face to face, let me spit on him, let me see god's face, i'll show him rebelry, now
every body reading this thinks im just confused, if you knew i am more conscious than
angels sounding trumpeths, i die slowly, years digging up the truth, days to grasp the
grass on top of the bodies, so many years, so many clouds, how heavy they hang the god
watching us die? Go away! im not a traitor, i just read the truth, so i will love to kill
you all, so stupid to think you know beyond but i cheated death enough times to tell you
how wrong you are, how stupid you've dealt this war, you let the world fall and dig up a
grave so sacred, let me kiss her farewell, my life is over soon, take me to hell, satan is
dragging me down, Mr. Butcher cut me on million pieces, take us all to hell, enter the
light ahead, fight the darkness inside, is all about violence, is the only way we know how
to reason reality...

How many more years will it take for my writings to make others understand how dark this
place is? How far will i go to show off my abilities? Why is this so hard? Is it real this
pain? For a moment we all bury truth to sleep besides the enemy, drag me to hell, take my
soul and bury my corpse, show me truth, show them death, take me to hell, take us all,
show me the truth, blood runs deep, fear runs deeper, take me to hell and show off my
world, i will slay the snake once alive, were did i fell from? Hahaha! Funny... How long
have you been alive kid?


Details | Free verse | |

THE FARMER

He sells his soul to tend the 
earth
To make this crown within 
my plate
Yet I am taught to hate this 
man.

In rain or shine he strikes 
his blow
To force my future life to 
grow
Yet I am told to hate this 
man.

He crawls for miles to feed 
me fresh
Extorted yet he toils the 
more
Yet I am asked to hate this 
man.

With crude weapons he 
makes his war
For me he waits upon the 
rains
Yet I am forced to hate this 
man.

Am ignorant peasant they 
claim
Has not a place amongst the 
saved
But which ought people best 
pamper:
The golden egg or bird 
which lays?


Details | Rhyme | |

Never Take Hate Outside

When you're hurt inside,
And there's no where to hide,
And there's no one on your side,
And it's killing your pride,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is chocking,
The heavy words never spoken,
The things that hurt you inside,
When love has died,
Inside,
Never take hate outside,

When your heart is gone,
From being alone,
And it beats a solemn tone,

When you're cold inside,
It's only a short ride,
Never take hate outside


Details | ABC | |

Coward

People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?
Why has this life become so meaningless,
that we just want to throw it away?
We become selfish and think our life is so bad,
dont think of others who's lives are worse, But still greatful for what they have.
People take for granted the things they've got,
clothes, food, smokes and shoes, even a roof or a bed,
They dont think of the homeless,
the hungry, not even the cold or the hot.
They just think they want to be dead,
Things happen in our lives that, to us, seem bad.
We dont look for help or trust any "friends"
All because of the past we've had.
Dont be a coward and run away,
Stick it out, Live life,
I know that there's alot of strife,
But stick it through day to day.
People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?....


Details | Rhyme | |

The Things I want, The Things I Get

Once upon a time I loved a girl but she didn’t love me back.
Once upon a night I wished on a star but my dreams never came to pass. 
Twice I think I hoped for the sun and not the rain pouring in.
But my cover flew away and the drops soaked through my skin. 

I think I could wish for hard times and the dark,
And just to spite my soul the world would set ablaze from a single spark.
My money would pile high, 
girls would wave as they walked by.
And the one thing can I say for this life,
Is no one ever got a damn thing from goodbye. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Hate

I Hate You! Yo did it again. I don't know why i keep going back to you. You have hurt me so 
much. You say you love me then you stab me in the heart. You say your sorry and then 
cheat on me. I don't know why but you think it's a joke when you say you love someone you 
need to mean it. I hate you so much! yor are a a&& of a person. You need to become a 
better person. You have hurt so many peole. Love is something you don't take lightly. I hate 
you because all of the pain you have put me through, and it will never change


Details | I do not know? | |

I Hate You

I hate you, whoever you are,
I hope your hit by a car.
I hate you, you took my heart,
When you took his life before it got to start.
I hate you, for taking him away,
And haunting my life with that day.
I hate you, its all your fault,
I hope you feel a knifes assault.
I hate you, for doing this to me,
I hope your torment you'll never be free.
I hate you, everything you are,
I hope your doomed to a hell afar.
I hate you ooh so much,
I hope you feel deaths touch.


Details | Rhyme | |

bloody red roses part 2

     She lies in a pile of bloody red roses

She left a note to her folks  saying

" I cant go on im sorry"

      It didnt say why

But still we cry

      We are all very sad

some of us are mad

       none of us are glad

She'll b greatly missed

        To me she was like a sis

But when will the rumors stop

        Noone knows the truth not even the cops

My pain is great 

       I wish we hadnt been late

But when we got there 

        there she lay 

on her already made bed of

Bloody red roses


Details | I do not know? | |

I Hate you Mum

 I hate you mum
You are so mean
Why do I need to keep so clean?
I don’t need to wash
Can’t you see 
I don’t have time
I’m on the Wii

I hate you mum
Not sausages for tea
Mashed potato and baked beans
I want cake I want chocolate
Jelly and cream
You really are horrid
So old and so mean

I hate you mum
Why did you forget
To take my old jeans
To the launderette?
I was busy at school
You were only at work
Why didn’t you do it
You know how to hurt

I hate you mum
I’m not going to bed
You really are starting
To do in my head
Always telling me what to do
Homework and housework
They’re jobs for you.

I’m sorry mum
I’ve cut my knee
Please can we have
Sausages for tea?
Can I show you my book?
Will you teach me to cook?
Can I have a hug?
I love you mum


Details | Blank verse | |

Mother To Son

No child, do not think I hate you
When I hit you with the rod.
Not that I am wilder than our wildest mothers
Or hate to see you play,pick or pluck
Sweet pleasure with your hands.
Do not admire those who do the drugs
And taking too much drink, take their own wits.
You cannot afford to be at a standstill
Like those who watch and wait 
For the wings of chance.

When all is harsh around and about
When your mates mark and make their way
You cannot afford to be at a standstill!
Go to school and make for yourself a man
Grow up, my little man and warm 
My heart with your wisdom.
Do not let your prime wander
And by wandering lose the way.
Seize the satchel while spring is green
For if you are shiftless or lazy,
Time shall fall frozen upon your face


Details | Light Poetry | |

Down and Out

How I hate the way I feel today,
   I just want everything to go away.
Don't know if I am angry or sad ,
  All I know is that it feels real bad.
Everything is so mixed up inside ,
  Confused by it all I just want to cry.
Closing my eyes trying to get some rest,
   Doesn' help much getting only moments at best.
Hoping for nightfall is what I want now,
   Praying tomorrow will be better some how.
How I hate these days when I am down ,
   Wishing nobody would ever come around.
Asking myself why I am in this mood,
   What will it take to change my attitude.
Surely there is something to make me smile,
   I wonder if there is because it's been awhile.
Reading the book to maybe see my way through,
   It doesn't help either I am still feeling blue.
Listening to others and what they have to say,
   Changes nothing at all I still feel this way.
Why are there days I feel so down and out ,
   Makes me want to just scream and shout.
Wait for the morning sunrise is what I'll do,
   Possibly then I will be able to talk to you.
Oh how I do not like the way I feel today,
   It's just the worst ever feeling this way.
TAC


Details | Rhyme | |

Loving to hate

I hate the way life treats people,
Unfair in the strangest ways,
Allowing good people to suffer,
And the bad, to be happy for days,

I hate the way life acts,
Adding damage to where it has been done,
It tears up hearts and rips out souls,
And destroys all sense of fun,

I hate the way life goes,
Killing people that don’t have to die,
Letting innocent people suffer,
Forcing loved ones to hurt and to cry,

But I love the way life happens,
They way two people just meet,
Their love can bring them happiness,
True love, without deceit,

I love the way life flows,
With memories deep and true,
To remind you just who you are,
And to always, just be you,

I love the challenge life gives,
Makes you brave, courageous and strong,
To bring out the best in you,
Cause you’ve had inside all along.

I love life for making me sad,
Make me suffer and cry and scream,
For giving me hope and beliefs,
So I can always dream...


Details | I do not know? | |

The Energy of Hatred

I see my faith it’s so worn and lost
At least I know this
I drink my daily cup of lust
I know I do not need it
I am living in my own ways
Too bad my soul is rotten
I know that all life is dead
Seems you’ve all forgotten

Ash and dust are in our eyes
We dream that we’re alone here
We’ve let their hate hypnotise
There’s nothing now to hold dear
It’s here I stand without my lies
I know I’m so near
But when I’m close I hear you die
And I am left here

Now I’m high without my skin
Seems that hate surrounds me
I will fade into my mind
I dream I am free
The balance is so lost right now
When I can hear you
The fuel of hate will fill me up
Now I am dead too

Ash and dust will fill my mind
I live in someone’s anger
When I’m here I am so blind
The smell of death will linger
Now that hate is on my side
I’m breathing with my power
But fading out will make me hide
And now my hate is sour

Waking up I am not dead
But I must start again
I just try to sleep instead
This will make it rain
So I arise among the lost
Silence in my thoughts says:
You are alive but you are gone
But it is here you must stay

So when hate comes to take me down
I know I must erase it
And if I find that it makes me drown
I know I must escape it
The ash is trust, it’s in your bread
You can’t survive without this
Possessing dust is in your head
But with this you seek bliss
Here I am I know what’s true
I live for myself
Once you see you live for you
You will see your own wealth


Details | Free verse | |

Palindrome madness

Flying above streams of love.

Poison flowing streams of hate. 

Streams dried and dead love found. 

Love lost love. 

Love found death.



Loving sounds drowned by hate.
The same hate that tore apart soul mates. Love was much,but hate over weight. Love on a silver plate, while hate on a golden plate. Is this the way of faith?If so it dose not seem to be accurate. Removing love from the throne, making hate chief of the state. Wells of love dried. It only became wet when it cried. Worldwide we cast this love aside. Still I stand by love,side by side. Along side the bonafide.

By: Elliott Bowe
Palindrome mad poetry contest.
The following lines are considered
Palindrome:Flying above streams of love.

Poison flowing streams of hate. 

Streams dried and dead love found. 

Love lost love. 

Love found death.


Details | Free verse | |

Injustice

What do I owe to be the
 receiver of such injustice
 from you?
 
Can you search within 
your own black heart to
 find the real reasons for
 your heinous actions.
 
For no one shall assist you 
in such an evil task, nor 
give you an ounce of satifaction.
 
To quietly ignore the acts from 
such a diabolical and fever
 devoured mind shall be my best
 revenge.
 
As I watch you slowly dig a 
trough that will surely be your own
 grave for those who know you 
will surely dance upon.
 
The enemy is within you, yet 
you will not see him until
 it is too late, for you to 
recant the deeds that have
 surely sealed your own fate!
 
If only you could cast away 
all hate, but such a task is
 a tall order for which you
 can't accede to. Await your fate! 


Details | Free verse | |

idk

In this world of live do God give or do God spend.
In god we trust your money make your life bless for best. Pay why when die heaven give no money life. Said of game now dont take da words an miss name da fame. smh. Cause this world is vein, so i bleed outside to water my mainstream of heart filled out the box of art. A gift is but live so a gift is what give. Present I wake no mistake to my take of day, now I play a one way ticket of gold with sweet palace like chocolate for da kids an family. Can't stand it, well dat make manish no planish; know how to stand it. Nerves get on some badish. Then handle all debts publick an private no childish just so wildish. Judge me not 4 i break only da law of da land with out a sight of the man. Then I walk out this cell knowing every step I take is hell to heaven.
amen


Details | I do not know? | |

MLK - 1929 - 1968

MLK...
(January 15, 1929 – April 4, 1968)


they shot you down
all those years ago

but

your dream lives on
and always will

for though much has been
gained since you dreamed
your dream

there is much to fight for
and much more to struggle for

and much, much more
to fight for still

so
your dream resounds in
our hearts and we pledge 
this to you today
for though they shot you down
all those years ago on a memphis day
we shall overcome
this we do believe
deep in our hearts
that
we shall overcome
someday...


(for Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.)


Details | I do not know? | |

Blasphemy

Blasphemy

The caustic tongues of the evangelists,
Across all creeds and faiths,
Seem as brittle as an old bone.

For they promise heaven and they spew forth threats of hell
While neglecting the words of that man who walked in Galilee

'let him who is without sin, cast the first stone'

the caustic tongues of the evangelists...

across all religions
new-age and the ones of old
baffle me even as I hear
a single simplistic sermon

for they really do, view us all
as blind imbeciles
scurrying around like faithless vermin


the caustic tongues of the evangelists...

wag on and dazzle us with visions of an eternal paradise
while here and now
their hypocrisy festers
within their earnest
well-meaning eyes...


'...dil mein hai khwaaish-e-hoor-o-jannat
aur zaahir mein shauk-e-ibaadat
bas hamen sheikh-ji aap jaise
allah-waalon se allah bachaaye...'


'...in your heart you desire the maidens of heaven
yet in the now you practice the rituals of piety
o' sheikh, may allah protect me
from the people of allah like yourself...'

is my tongue as caustic as the tongues I write about?
if so, then glad am I
for they shouldn't be the only ones
who preach and rant and continually shout

from their pulpits ever so high in the sky
from their hubris of comfort in possessing the 'truth'

from their 'knowing' that heaven or hell
awaits both the strong as well as the meek

while oblivious to the reeking foul smell
that encourages prejudice and hate
and visions not of peace
but of endless chants and prayers

which they, in their opium haze
rattle on and on
as they never seem to cease to speak

and though I’m sure that all this bile that I have spewed
will threaten
hurt
and offend

friend and
unfriend and
acquaintance alike

but...

take pity on me instead
for it'll surely be I
who'll burn eternally
impaled by a benevolent god
on a slightly warmer than normal day in hell

on a crude wooden spike.


Details | I do not know? | |

Going Fast

Caught with glances past
Holding memories going fast
Faces lost pasts caught
I am sorry but I have no memory 
Of any times with you

As good as you look
Your only a odd felt hook
And what we had is now only you
As I open a new book
You would be some thing new

Yes I remember
But theres nothing that I feel
Here to remind me, nothing now here to do
I have nothing but pains for the memory
Your not even a fact or a smell
So untill you are actually bold
I will count you as cold
Some where in a dream I can't hold


Details | I do not know? | |

I Hate

I hate the birth mark under my right eye
I hate my extremely static hair
I hate my big bottom lip
I hate my spotty nose

I hate that I have really *****y times
I hate that people only remember me for my really *****y times
I hate that the real *****es hate me
I hate being cautious so they don’t ***** about me

I hate that I cry over everything
I hate that people know I cry over everything
I hate that I hide from them anyway
I hate that they actually don’t care 

I hate the fact that my brother is leaving home next year
I hate the fact that I cried when he told me that
I hate the fact that I hid my tears from him
I hate the fact that he’s all I really have left

I hate my father for making me feel like he doesn’t care about me
I hate my mother for making me feel like she picked him over me
I hate that my brother had to look after me when they couldn’t be bothered
I hate that, in my eyes, they don’t deserve to be called mum and dad

I hate that when I was younger I had to run away from my father
I hate that my mother and brother left me by myself that day
I hate that they left me closer to my father
I hate that they went somewhere I would have felt safer

I hate that I feel like my friends are slowly fading away from me
I hate that I feel like I’m a third wheel
I hate that I feel like my friend’s don’t trust me
I hate that I feel like I can’t trust my friends

I hate the feeling of loneliness
I hate that I read books to escape to a world better than mine
I hate that I write to create a better life than my own
I hate that people want to invade that one heaven I invented

I hate that people ask me why I made Katy Clover Taylor
I hate that I had to make a role model for myself
I hate that she is the person I desperately want to be
I hate that she is the one thing I will never live up to

I hate that I feel like my grades would grasp my families attention
I hate that feeling of disappointment when I get a bad grade
I hate feeling like I have to live up to an expectation to hold their attention
I hate that I am relied on because of my grades

I hate that I am an older mind trapped in a younger body
I hate that I am limited in what I can do because of my age
I hate not being trusted upon
I hate people treating me as a kid

I hate not telling people how I feel
I hate hiding behind an invisible barrier
I hate not being able to share how I feel with people
I hate being scared that they won’t care.

I hate people judging me
I hate judging people
I hate that feeling of giving up
I hate the feeling of losing when I didn’t give up

I hate the choices I have made
I hate that nobody thinks I can live up to my dream
I hate people thinking they are so much better than me
I hate the fact that they are right

I hate that I will never make a good girlfriend
I hate the fact I know nobody would fall for me
I hate knowing that no one would help me pick up my life
I hate that it has fallen apart

I hate hurting the people I love
I hate them not loving me anymore
I hate knowing that what I would do would hurt people
I hate the fact I do it anyway

I hate knowing that I do all of this
I hate knowing I hate all of this
I hate trying to change it
I hate that I am not able to change it

I hate that I try not to give up hope
I hate knowing all hope is lost
I hate that I still try and cling to it anyway
I hate knowing I failed at that too

But most of all

I hate not being able to express this until now
I hate that this still won’t change a thing
I hate thinking that it still might
I hate knowing that no one cares


Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

SHE FALSE ME, SHE FALSE ME NOT

As time flies, so her emotion swiftly fries,
As life frowns to dust, so her affection swiftly drowns to lust,
As love turns to coal, so her smile swiftly runs to the cold,
As sunset sets away, so her truth swiftly upsets the root of likeness, and erects away the boldness of trust, 
but her hate doesn't rate me to roasted rat, because her hate is wingless, and no other can make her sweat and melt to hashes like I do.  

Damn! I’m damned, if I get soak in her socking beauty,
Damn!  I’m damned, if I get stolen by her golden smile,
Damn! I’m damned, if I don’t bench her lioness sex drive, I’ll infinitely feel less, like a quenched man. 
Damn! I’m damned, if I merge with her chameleon cries and battalion kisses.

If I give in fully, just for the sake of ‘be a real man’, not 'a steel man',
my life will end up like the life of a North American bug, which inflicts painful bite on love and life.
When I transparently decide to give into love, all I get is:
Vultures smoking cigarette in an uncultured manner,
Kangaroo's doing Michael Jackson’s moonwalk in a live show in Cameroon,
Monkeys ordering for coffee, while wooing female donkeys  
Zebras playing golf, with liberal views,  
Lizards rearing Afro and trying to reawaken Lazarus from the dead,
Dingo's wearing costly tuxedos in Mexico, and speaking Spanish fluently,
Frogs driving Rang-Rove jeeps, in a foggy weather
Snakes wearing condoms to nibble into snacks,
Female Goats, wearing sexy underpants, to enable them float in a sinking Titanic boat
Bareheaded demons and bears drinking chilled bears together in a beheaded mood and using chilly pepper, to chill down their temper,
Horses babysitting housewives

I trip endlessly! 
lost in a confused mood and temper, for she false me, she false me not.

I limp endlessly!
No matter how we try to put souls together to make our love bright and wealthy like the brightened face of Paris and the fat pocket of Las Vegas, 
We always end up creating a poverty of love. 

I have relentlessly tried praying forcefully for our love, 
but I end up noticing that people, who aggressively pray the most for love, end up marrying angry praying-mantis.  

I will just have to remain light-footed in love,  and let her featherweight affections for me, turn to true feelings, or get carried away, because she false me, she false me not.


Details | Free verse | |

Leading it on your own

I know it’s hard but you have to try
How can you live your life lie?
You say you hate who you’re closest to, to another 
But around him, he’s not like a cousin but a brother
How can you just let them take over you?
Next you’ll be a singer to 
Just like him 
The changes of you not being are very slim 
You let him dress you, and tell you what to do, How to act 
Becoming of what you used to hate as a matter of fact
He tells you who’s in and who’s out
You can’t lead so he does is that what its about?
You have always followed the crowd
Does that make you proud?
To not follow your heart 
 Minding them and playing your own part 
But when you come around me I see what you want to be true
Or at least that’s what I used to think 
But when I’m gone or your with them it all changes
Filled with nothing but perfect Barbie doll images 
That’s like tonight I’m gone and all you do is talk 
If you can talk then walk 
Show me you can do something to do 
Leading it on your own 


Details | I do not know? | |

i miss you

                                 life is sad when you lose someone 
     but you alway's gain someone new . you could never replace a number one
and kinda woulde'nt want two. friend's come into your life and friend's go out of 
your life. why? know one  really know's. and all that remaine's is a gut for of guilt 
wondering why? i hate it when people come into your life and dont even say goodbye.
i hate it when they look you in the eyes and say i'll never hurt or use you only to hit
you double hard with it. how can a person be so mean to start a friendship and lie from
the start . why can't they be real and honest from the start . 
how can a person forget someone who's been there for them from the start? how can 
they walk away with a loving heart? and not care about how bad they tore the person apart.
        life is a mess these day's i see there's so much dishonesty so much lie's 
how can a person really get by ?


Details | Free verse | |

The Night Circus

After dark I feel 
The need to be awake 
In the forbidden world
The world that shows
Me my mirror
Of hope, despair, glory
A true story

After dark civilization goes to bed
Primitiveness reigns away
The ugly looks beautiful
And all are in unison 
Riches and rags
Virgin to whore
We all go through
The same door

After dark the sun retires
The moon prevails
With a thousand blind eyes
One sees it all
One hears it all 
Tomorrow?
Denial 

After dark sounds sound
Sounder
Louder
Sharper
The dark darkness
Brighter

After dark emptiness befriends 
Intoxicating booze
Lighter spirit
Gently infused

Bottled up emotions
The bottle helps …
To confess



Details | Lyric | |

From the heart of society

Theres a girl 
she pours out her heart 
gives him everything
changes her hair goes to get 
fat sucked out of her cause no 
one tells her that she really is 
beautiful she goes home to see him in bed
kissing another girl, then get up and smack her around
people ask where she got her brusies and why she hides her face
but behinde that mask hideing her scars is a girl fearing for her life 
scared to go home to that man that just might give her more scars.
Theres a guy 
who takes care of his brother
comes home and covers his brothers ears 
while his mommy and daddy make him fear
fear for his life his mom brings home different guys 
every night, daddy is never home but when he is 
they fear for  there life that just maybe that might be the last day 
the last breath they live to take
Next day he comes home and sees mommy on the floor bleedin 
his little brother tied to the bed stabed in he chest 
he tries to run but trips and falls
three week later the found him floating down the river..
These are the  people we ignore every day 
the ones that cry out for help
 the ones that need us the most..
The ones that are pimped out and dont see there beauty
 the ones that hide the scars that the one they love put on there face
This is our world and society today


Details | I do not know? | |

I'm not so sure

This song makes me think of myself. It's call "what the hell" by Avril Lavine


You say that I'm messing with your head
All cause I was making out with your friend
Love hurts whether it's right or wrong
I can't stop cause I'm having too much fun

You're on your knees
Begging please stay with me
But honestly, I just need to be a little crazy

All my life I've been good,
But now I'm thinking What The Hell
All I want is to mess around
And I don't really care about
If you love me if you hate me
You can save me, baby, baby
All my life I've been good
But now whoaaaa what The Hell

So what if I go out on a million dates
You never call or listen to me anyway
I'd rather rage than sit around and wait all day
Don't get me wrong
I just need some time to play

You're on your knees
Begging please stay with me
But honestly I just need to be a little crazy

All my life I've been good,
But now I'm thinking What The Hell
All I want is to mess around

And I don't really care about
If you love me if you hate me
You can save me
Baby, baby all my life I've been good
But now whoaaa  what The Hell

La-la-la-la la la
Whoa Whoa
La-la-la-la la la
Whoa Whoa

You say that I'm messing with your head
Boy, I like messing in your bed
Yeah, I am messing with your head when
I'm messing with you in bed

All my life I've been good,
But now
I'm thinking What The Hell
All I want is to mess around
And I don't really care about
All my life I've been good,
But now
I'm thinking What The Hell
All I want is to mess around
And I don't really care about
If you love me
If you hate me
You can save me
Baby, baby
All my life I've been good
But now
Whoaaa...
What The Hell

Lalalalalalalalalala
Lalalalalalalalala


Details | Blank verse | |

Alone With No Sense Of Direction

I am a lost person, but I am not alone.
I make choices in my life and I choose to let go.
I need a change of space, and my lyrical notes,
The beauty and the face should fade, but more I want to grow.
The nobility in life is sad, when madness is a nuisance and insanity a fad.
I have some regrets, some I can't forget,
but If I can't forgive myself, then who will forgive my sins?
I'll give it my all, and pray I win.
I'll keep my heart locked and throw away the key,
never let anyone inside, so I can remain free.
Can I question a higher power, or would I be dead,
The scum of the earth, creating poetry that is read,
by the mindless masses, blaming the heart to death,
I hope this will heal me, burning the past, 
The beauty in the innocence, never really lasts.
I have a feeling tonight will open my eyes, 
and guide me too the light instead of lies.
I'm praying to god that you are how I think you are,
because I need compassion, not just a broken heart.
I don't know why I like you, but you seem to close to part.
Please don't leave me here, surrounded in the dark.


Details | Lyric | |

Lier

Cant you see?
I hate the way you stare
I love the way you cant win with me
I'm never going to smile at you as if I care
Like I don't have my walls up

So walk away
You cant change my mind  
I'm not some starving stray
You think I don't see your smile and wink, but I'm not blind

All you will ever see
Is my fading back
As I walk away, I'm not some stray you can buy at a high fee
My hate towards you makes me want to crack
And prick you with my rosy thorns

So just leave me alone
I will never let you in
Just let me go home
I hate you as much as sin
No matter how many diamonds and books you give
I will just burn them all
And shatter and ignore your call
I know that there's a fall to your rise
I lie in your eyes
A fake in your cry
Your scream is just a guise

So get out!
Go somewhere else!
My loyalty doesn't lie with you
My smiles will never be true to you
I will not lose to your riches
I want a refund and a receipt so I can return your gift
With a two for one gift card complete with your *****es
I tore up all those dresses by the stitches
And wound them around your door
You will always know what this is for


Details | Rhyme | |

THE UNWANTED RISE OF TEARS

My own downfall,
being with no malice of intent.
the gravity of being born with no force,
my soul even wanders beyond my spirit.
shame of uncleanliness;
guilt of unworthiness,
troubles of accepting,
missing pieces that can't be held together.
troubles with sanity,
sometimes roughing it out to tip of the edge of reasoning.
no rest for the weary,
thanks!, things couldn't get any tougher than this.
mentality co-existing with no hope of success,
unwanted failures and regrets slowing me down until it all ends.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Hate Hoodrats

I hate hoodrats,
To me they are no match.
I hate them with the passion.
I always prayed in the hood,
As a child, that when I got
Grown I would go buck wild
Beating anyone their backend mass,
Because they are low class,
They make sure that the strong,
Black family existence is a thing 
Of the past. I hate their food stamp
Selling, never excelling, treacherous
Trashy tails. They are sell-outs,
Because they let the government
Bail them out and enslave them,
Our men, and beautiful children
They are hindering progress of the future.
I wish that there were sharp-shooters,
That would zap all of them in the back of,
Their red, orange, purple, and blue hair.
They walk around without a care,
In the world. They are lost souls.
Sold out to Satan wrecking the Black nation.
They cause other strong Black women from
The hood that have a little success, a whole
Life of professional distress. I hope one day one
Hoodrat would understand, that they are part
Of Satan’s plan to rob, kill, and destroy, all
Of the little black girls and boys, and most 
Of all killing the men, while causing who to win?
Satan. One day I will get enough Godly strength
To pray for them instead of physically slapping the
Hell out of them. I through prayer will slam Satan’s 
Silliness out of them, but for right now as I work the
Plow and get enough knowhow. Just shame, shame , 
Shame, shame, on all of the hoodrats’ hellified names.



Defend the poor and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy. Deliver the poor and 
needy: rid them out of the hand of the wicked." Though this seems to be directed at other 
gods, it is good advice for humans as well. Psalm 82:3-4

Wealth obtained by fraud dwindles, but the one who gathers by labor increases it. Proverbs 
13:11


Details | Free verse | |

Only I Stay

I am so tired of being treated like a fool
i always hear you say that u want to leave 
at times am just ready to say go am done 
i left everything for you , and yet i get nothing.
Am just so tired of everything!!! 

I get so sad i cry at times when i take a shower 
i just sit there let the water run down my skin
think of the past and remember the good things
that happened to me i miss them so much!!!

I dont get to see my family if i even talk to my mom
i hear what did you tell her dont tell her about
our relationship !!! i get so tired of you my life is so 
hard like living in the inferno !!! I wish i was back 
in my own life to make my decisions not have a heartless 
guy do it!

The only thing i want is just to be able to be myself 
i hate having to pretend to do everything right i make
mistakes i want to say what i want when i want to 
i just want to be me Cant u understand!!

My life wasnt all that perfect but back in the day i 
had fun was able to be myself !! But i just want
respect someone to let me be me !!

why must you tell me what to do?? You dont 
even trust me to go to the store by myself!!!! 
i hate you at times but am just so hurt that life is 
this way how did i let this happen !! 

How do i change life as we know it ???  sometimes i
wish i was departured from you why do u tell me that 
you say you dont even love your own son You 
know how that makes me feel !!!??  You dont 
because you dont care !!


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not Your Fault

The thing about life
is that
it can end in an instant

When the rope of the
harsh words
wraps tightly around your 

Neck squeezing tighter
and tighter
you just want to jump

To end it all to end all
the pain
and the hatred and words

It is not only the words
that push
you over the edge

It is too the fists and
the feet 
that slam into you

Over and over
without
a break with out letting up 

Making you break down and slide down
the wall
and cry and cry and cry

One phone call can 
save a
live, stopping that jump

Stopping the self hate
and
spreading the love

The love i have for 
you will 
never fade or die and i hope

will make you better
to sleep
and to be able to be 

Happy again to 
be happy
forever and always with me

just remember and know
that it's
NOT YOUR FAULT


Details | Bio | |

Anger

Dark Roiling Rage,
like the waters of the Indian ocean in a 
silver flecked storm.
Uncontrollable tears take hold 
and not meant for others to see.
Hate, Love, Betrayal.
Emotions that one can't feel 
if they never existed in the first place.
Being emotionless in a fight is the way I'll survive.
Love fading,
skin turning grey,
is it to late?
my time has been long up.
I know no other way to live.
while I am emotionless,
 I'll never have to endure the cruel tormenting taunts, or
the abuse, or the betrayal.


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate it

I hate it when they say I'm pretty
I hate it when they don't explain
I'm not pretty
I'm ugly
I'm a monster no one should love
I hurt
I scare
I'm the only monster they want to be friends with
I hate it
I don't get it
The fact that I'll hurt them more than they bargained for
They'll get hurt
But insist to never leave my side
I hate it
I hate the fact that I'm a monster
But still
We will see how long they last
Before they run
And regret meeting me


Details | Free verse | |

The Friend Type

That's all I am
To all those guys
I'm just the friend type
Never the girlfriend type

I hate it
I hate being nothing
I hate having to be so caring
So understanding

I'll never be more
I'll rot
Just being friends with all of them
All those guys
But nothing more
The friend type is all I am


Details | Lyric | |

I Gave You Right Back

I remember when you gave yourself to me,
But I gave you right back.
Because I couldn’t stop hurting you,
And I hated doing that.
I can’t be selfish as I wanna be,
and much as I need your touch.
I can’t have that follow me.
Enough just might be enough.

But love comes all the way back around,
I didn’t know you then and I don’t know you now.

Hearts beat,
Trust me,
I asked mine to stop beating aloud.
Tears are dreams,
That have to flee,
Cause they’d been cast out. 
And smiles speak,
Yours talks to me,
But I replied with a frown.
Cause I can’t keep this up,
Enough is now enough.
Don’t look for me I’m gone now.


Details | Concrete | |

Why you hate mi

                                              Why you hate mi??

Why you hate mi and a god mi put first?
Bad mind mi, a Jesus broke the curse!! (2*) 

God inna mi life, a him mi put first
Good over evil, a mi you can’t curse
His not my fate, mek your life get worst 
Mi seek him first, so how mi life must be worst

Why you hate mi and a god mi put first?
Bad mind mi, a Jesus broke the curse!! (2*) 

I love those how hate I, used I, and wish mi bad – a call down curse
Blessed love anyway, cause god inna mi life, a him mi put first
A praise him from mi heart, not from mi mind, and that’s the reason prosperity start 
shine

Why you hate mi and a god mi put first?
Bad mind mi, a Jesus broke the curse!! (2*) 

Love those who hate you, used you, and wish you bad, bad mind you, grudge you, 
don’t like how you “trad.”
Do unto others, you want them do unto you
Harm no one, and let no one harm you, have faith in the lord, not in man!

So, why you hate mi and a god mi put first?
Bad mind mi, a Jesus broke the curse!! (2*) 

Seek he first, and you life won’t be worst
Praise him from your heart, not from your mind
Have faith, work hard, and live out the hip
Abide by the rules, regulations, laws, and commandment sign
Put god first, materials behind
When you fall, get up same time
And don’t let the same thing catch you next time



Details | I do not know? | |

History

Life is as it is when it comes,

My friend- it is as it is when it comes,

We like it, Love it or hate it, 

We're movin on,

From yesterday. 



Let the bridges burn as you walk, 

Rise the silver smoke,

An' let the silent wind guide your hand, 

With the blade that carves out your days, 

From what you see, 

When I ask,

Close your eyes..?



Oh it's a carliedahskope of mystery, 

How the colors dance, in the darkness, 

An how magicians tricks still amaze, 

Oh it’s a carliedahskope of mystery, 

All the History..


Life, is as it is when it goes, 

My friend it is as it is when it comes,

We like it, Love it Or hate it, 

But were livin it, 

An' it is as it is- when comes yesterday.. 

It is as it is and will always be, 

The History.


Details | Rhyme | |

God Forgives Us Of Our Wrongs

God Forgives Us Of Our Wrongs!

God forgives us of our wrongs!
And he wants us all, to try and get along!

He gave us his word and instructions…
But, too often, we don’t seem to “function!”

Something done, or something said…
And it’s like some people, wish you were “dead.”

Even in Christ’ body, there’s dysfunction from the start.
Ending up in another wounded and bleeding heart!

What if Christ treated us, like how we treat each other?
What if he turned his back, like we do our brother?

No matter the good...  A list of wrongs is often kept.
What’s been done…  Someone can’t seem to forget???

Do you find yourself, a person
 who’s easily offended?
By someone you don’t like,
 or one you’ve befriended?

May I suggest a “heavy dose” of 1 Cor. Thirteen?
The love of God can take care of ANYTHING!

If it didn’t, then Christ’ death is meaningless and lost.
He bore all of our sins that day on the cross!

If we can’t forgive your brother over something he’s done…
We need to ask forgiveness of Christ…  God’s son!

There’s no excuses, in God’s 
kingdom that’s eternal!
Will your name be written
 in heaven’s journal???

By Jim Pemberton


Details | I do not know? | |

hate

i hate him 
hes the worst 
i love is just a mask 
you hid behind.

don't count me as a fool
i can see your snarl 
right threw.

i hate your nasty, sneaky ways.
you did have me at hello.
but now i caught your bluff

be gone you betrayer 
you lustful jerk

iv caught you right handed 
that's it your busted..

say bye now you'll never see me again
you'll never be able to hurt me
to tare me inside out

be gone you betrayer
be gone you lustful jerk.


Details | Free verse | |

My Shadow



Blackness, a dark version of me, badness, negativity.

No matter how fast i run or were i run too your right behind me.

Even the brightest sun doesn’t destroy you, you only exist because of me.

All i know is when i face the darkness you disappear, but to only return when the sun rises.



Details | Rhyme | |

Untitled

I hate that I have to watch you die,
And there's nothing I can do.
I hate that there is no perfect cure,
There is no saving you.

I hate that I can't fix it,
Every day, you have to fight.
Struggling to keep your memories,
This whole thing isn't right.






Details | Pantoum | |

A Hole Within

A hole is here within
Destroyed a piece in me
Hurt finds its lonely place
Emptying my sensitive heart
Destroyed a piece in me
Displaying hate throughout
Emptying my sensitive heart
Locking the door permanently
Displaying hate throughout
Hurt finds its lonely place
Locking the door permanently
A hole is here within 

Russell Sivey

Entrant into Francine Roberts' "4 forms, 4 themes" contest

1/12/2012

Theme: Lost Love


Details | Rhyme | |

Married Liar

You are leading a double life I found out that you have a wife The pain cuts deeply like a knife Thank you for the emotional strife You didn’t have to lie to me Living your life unfaithfully You have hurt me immensely I never wanted to hate you really You never truly deserved me I never wanted to hate you really You have hurt me immensely Living your life unfaithfully You didn’t have to lie to me Thank you for the emotional strife The pain cuts deeply like a knife I found out that you have a wife You are leading a double life


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Nobody Can

There is nobody in this world knows how I am feeling right now,
Trying to  get it to all  make some kind of sense from it  some how.
   Filled with deceptions and lies leaving me nothing for me to find,
One memory there is that is truly real cause there's none in my mine.
   This sickening feeling overwhelms me making me cold to my soul,
I am surrounded by gloom and sadness the worst I've ever known.
   How is it I am to suffer like this for loving with all my heart ,
Always protecting you and always been the light in your dark.
   Why me with the love so true and a honest soul  feel such pain,
I should feel the Sunshine in my life not tears that fall like rain.
   Was it the  blindness caused by her natural beautey and tender words,
Or is it that I have lied to myself for so long it was almost absured.
   Difficult for me to face this grief that I had always anticipated,
The moment you came back into my life these days been pre dated.
    It was Love itself I have wanted to bask in to know the Joy,
This despair , lonliness ,and all the nightmares  I needed to avoid.
    A wreck just waitng to happen and the wounds opened up again,
Never  thinking of when all began only wanting it all to just end.
   Days that will be lost and the memories you will never have,
It's the worst kind of emptiness and confusion I've ever had.
   These times we share when we are alone and nobody around,
The thoughts we have of fantasies are somewhat profound.
   Is there a lesson here to be learned and remembered ,
Or is it I am that lost soul  that lonely Pretender.
   This can't possibly be the very last and the end for me,
If so then it has always  been what was meant to be.
   When and how it all went wrong and strayed off course,
Something I will never know  or do I want to anymore.
   There is nobody  that knows what I am feeling today,
I tried making sense of it and found that there is no way.
   A fence that will never be mended or memories replaced,
Just a lonely life  and a broken heart is what I must face .
   Get on with my life  pray  for better days  I must do,
How  can I do that if it has to be without having you.
Tac


Details | Quatrain | |

LIES

Why do people tell untruths,
And lie about their neighbors,
Spinning tales of guilt and shame.
With tongues as sharp as sabers?

Why spend the time alotted you,
Destroying reputations,
Causing undue anguish 'mongst,
Your friends and close relations?

For one lie just begets one more,
And then the ball starts rolling,
And soon you've told so many lies,
The thing just won't quit growing;

And lies don't just produce more lies,
Oh No, there's that and more,
There's Hate for all the things you said,
And then Revenge for sure;

So lies are not just little things,
They hurt whoever's mentioned.
It doesn't really matter,
What at first was your intention;

For words have power, don't forget,
So guard your tongue with care,
For once the words have passed your lips,
It's said for foul or fair;

And life is such a fleeting thing,
Each day that passes, forfeit.
We really can't afford to waste,
One single, precious moment.


"TO HATE IS TO BE A LIAR, TO SLANDER IS TO BE A FOOL."
                                                                     Proverbs 10:18

"WHEN A GOOD MAN SPEAKS, HE IS WORTH LISTENING TO BUT THE WORDS OF FOOLS ARE A DIME A DOZEN."
                                Proverbs 10:20


Details | I do not know? | |

Your Name Is Misery

Your name is misery
here to haunt me in my dreams
In my waking hours and in my sleep
Nightmares and worst fears 
of course you can make them come true
For

Your Name Is Misery

You are the demon 
That called himself a dad
You are my illness, my shame, guilt and pain
I cannot shake you 
I try to run but you always catch me
I try to hide and you find me

Your Name Is Misery

You are the cause of my pain
I used to blame myself 
But lately I have found I am not the one to blame
I was a child
Innocent and helpless
when you took my dignity, my life my sanity

Your Name Is Misery

You have presented yourself in many forms
The school counselor who tried to violate me
The Father figure who molested me
The strangers who forced themselves on me
A gang paid to rape me
A Fiance who beat me 
And killed the child inside me
The voices that torment me

Your Name Is Misery

You have so many faces 
It would take my whole life to paint a picture of you
And quite frankly 
I don't want to waste my time on you
I just want to forget you

Your Name Is Misery

I wish I could get away from you
Break away from your grasp
Take away the control you have over me
I hate being under your spell
I hate the pain you constantly cause me 
I hate crying because of you
I hate the darkness you bring with you
Most of all 
I hate you

Your Name is Misery

That is no lie
There is no mistake 
You bring havoc, drama, and chaos 
All the things I despise 
I don't want you near me
I don't even want to look you in the eye

Your Name is Misery 

I am afraid of you 
I can't stand you 
most of all 
I am mad at you 
for you have made my life a living hell
But no more 
I am cutting you out 
I have never wanted you around
It is high time 
I got rid of you 
It's time to stand my ground
I am going to take you down
I don't need you
I never want to see you 
Get out of my life 
For I am not going to let you bring me down
You are not welcome here 

Your Name Is Misery

By: Jean Shular


Details | Rhyme | |

I hate that I love you

I write sometimes, but for who do I write
I stay up sometimes, but why am I up tonight
Maybe your my thoughts, or maybe just one bad memory 
I look at the stars, but all I see is dark emery
My eyes bleed, my thoughts drown
My hearts knows, but my mind frowns
Clever enough, your love still cuts the deepest                                                                                                                  Uphill from here, my life is at its steepest
Fragile, vulnerable, and weak minded too
Your still on my mind, and I hate that I love you
 
I cry for you, Tears of the past
Somedays I lie in bed, wondering why we didnt last
Other days I remember, why its over
Your hearts so cold, As cold as the end of November
My sweetest regret, my greatest mistake
But I wouldnt trade it in, real or fake

Forever you told me, Silly did I beleive   
Belitte as we speak, look at this heart as it greives                                                                                                                                  

Broken, weak, and lost without a clue                                                                                                                                        
Your still my greatest mistake, And I hate that I still love you
 
                                               
Time goes on, further apart we have grown
The past isnt the future, who would have known
Your so gone, but your memories they reign
Although you have hurt me, In love I remain
I will always wonder, why did this happen to me
But your faults have let me be
Regardless of the past, Im going to let go
Wasting time on you, is wasting time on something I dont know
Goodbye My Love, My memory, My Sweetest Mistake, The Girl I once Knew
One more thing to say--I hate that I still love you


Details | ABC | |

Hate From The Sky


Paper rain falling dark gray sky
Many tears falling disaster on the rise
Many eyes searching for the love lost 
From the hate that fell from the sky 
So much life gone so hard for those 
Who had to survive 
Searching for answers for what could 
Have gone wrong 
Trying to stay strong as they try to explain 
To the young at heart how one day 
Hate came to devastate and take 
The peace bring a storm of pain 
And lost love to never be found 
On sacred grounds we mourn and pray
For those we lost on a September day 
Who is to say we build from old to new 
So few knew those lost but on that day
The world held hands to pray 
For the fate of those we lost from hate 
Now we wont ever forget the date 
The world stud  still and came together 
Hand in hand together we stand 
To remember that warm September  
Flowers will lay words will be said 
Tears will fall  memories relived 
The world will hold hands once again
To pray for peace and love for those who remain    




Details | Rhyme | |

Lord bless me with an archangel

I cannot see at all a cloud of depression is making it dark
You call my name out loud but I don’t ever hear your hark
You have been here but I can’t still find a trace
Evil always surrounds me and it makes this a dismal place

There’s a devil deep inside of me that I just can’t see
Pressing on my last nerve to keep you away from me
He’s trying to make me sin and hate that’s his one true goal
I’m in a battle for my life Heaven save my soul
I’ll fight as hard as I can but I need some help from above
Lord bless me with an archangel to slay him so I can release my true love

To turn us against one another that is just his start
But he doesn’t realize the strength of our eternal beating heart
To break us up forever would give him such a thrill
But he cannot ever break us down because of our powerful will

There’s a devil deep inside of me that I just can’t see
Pressing on my last nerve to keep you away from me
He’s trying to make me sin and hate that’s his one true goal
I’m in a battle for my life Heaven save my soul
I’ll fight as hard as I can but I need some help from above
Lord bless me with an archangel to slay him so I can release my true love

Lucifer is jealous and greedy and he wants to makes us pay
But he will never succeed in throwing temptation down our way
No matter what he does we will never fail or fall
He cannot break the bond we have because he doesn’t understand love at all

There’s a devil deep inside of me that I just can’t see
Pressing on my last nerve to keep you away from me
He’s trying to make me sin and hate that’s his one true goal
I’m in a battle for my life Heaven save my soul
I’ll fight as hard as I can but I need some help from above
Lord bless me with an archangel to slay him so I can release my true love



Details | I do not know? | |

I hate me

I said I cannot love you
You said you cannot live without me
I said I have many responsibilities on my shoulders
You said you will share some of them
I said my life is a burden to me
You said you will remove all my obstructles
I said I am from a poor family
You said you never care
I said I am a hindu
You said you never bothered about the religion
I said I am the only one to help my family
You said you will give a hand to help them
And now I love you more than my life
I cannot live without you
But why you kicked out my love
And why you cheated me
I know you used me
And made me a mad in your love
How can I forget your last words
That You hate poor people and you never loved me
You hate my religion and never thought to help me
and you said I am nothing to you

Oh my love, You know that I cannot swim in this lovely ocean
And you took me to the centre
Left me free and you left my hand
I cannot survive in this world
Now I hate me for loving you


Details | Narrative | |

Red Eyes and Sinister Looks

Chains, hay forks, knives, and a hollow whisper,
become more true and sinister.
Halt in the middle of the moon light, 
and a waver image soon is no delight.
Voices run a muck in the head, 
so not calming you wish you were dead.
Gushing blood through the eye
not an image that you would rely.
Nails stuck on your neck with such pain
so your paralyze just little life sustain.
Hoodlums terrorizing people running a muck
did not really know they are in luck.
More dangerous beings are out their
to commit such act and with sinister stare.
Laughing with haunting echo's through
is an aspect of fear can imbue.
The wind changes direction to smother
the echoing sound of laughter.
The panicking state that you are in
soon drives a knife within.
Blood rushing out of your vain
a crucial part of your life dropping like rain.
Running without a destination
you will never reach anyone of your relation.
Sliding your body on a wall
keeping your fall in a stall.
Red eyes you can see it at night
is soon devouring you with little bite.
Changing your belief with tonics of relief
and it is to late to turn a new leaf.
Ears start to deceive the animals sound
eating limbs are chewing around.
Slowly your red eyes steadily getting heavy
is starting to take your life with a levy.
Dropping down with no attitude
and your life force slowly loses altitude.
Breathing comes not so easy
smelling flesh seems so beastly.
The change comes a desire
with frightening red eyes of fire.
Comes more lethal than the hoodlums 
your heart beating like drums.
Your hand becomes all fury
claws come out and your howl with furry.
Trance your in with no one to blame
a rage thats hundreds of centuries of flame.
Rising from a slumber of long lust
a animal instinct that you can trust.
Tearing things apart with no meaning
is a trait that is so deceiving.
Red eyes at night you see in a window
like a poisonous black widow.
Keeps you in attack mode of insanity
that takes all your vanity.
Ferocious emotions eating away
the soul that you had once betray.
The echoing sounds of loud thunder
breaks away the armor with sunder.
You fall once again to torturous agony
the feeling of one self is so lonely.
Shaking in the corner you are found
with blood soaked skin you drowned.
The night becomes day cruel in some way
your memories go in disarray.
The hunters with torches and sinister look
had parted way their hands shook.


Details | Free verse | |

my inner self

My inner self.

My soul is connected to the earth
My mind is all I know
My life, my art, my music is all I can share with the world
I’m humble; I inspire the person beside me
My family and my friends are my number one rule
Today I can share this with a stranger
Tomorrow I could die lying beside a stranger
I believe that my life is blessed
I have been divine to my friends
I listen with ears memorize with my eyes, my mind is my sacred home
If I could secure this world, I would save all the people that matter
I hate deceit, I hate poverty, I hate rules, and I hate not knowing
Not knowing how I could save the life of the one I know
My inner beauty is built to listen to the one I care about.


Details | I do not know? | |

do you?

i ran from all my troubles i ran to hide all my fears
i ran to be rid of this anger i ran to shed my tears 
bottled up inside me the hate for all my foes 
locked up inside this small dark room where  only the anger grows 
crucified by society on jesus's  i am the thorn 
i didnt ask for this way of life i didnt ask to be born
"our father who art in heaven hallow be thy name " 
i prayed to you for forgiveness but what did i gain 
have i found someone to love me have i found someone to care 
i prayed to god in my time of need but our lord wasnt there 
and so i walk these streets at night i walk down by the dock
lost inside these thoughts of mine i fall over a rock 
i curse the name of everyone its everone i hate 
to end up a lonley bitter man seems to be my fate 
to walk the path of many men to throw my life away
hello depression my old friend are you here to stay ?
isolate myself from the world ignoring all my phone calls 
no one understands my pain no one but these four walls 
so my friends whos reads  this do the best in all you do 
cos no one likes to be second best
no one does DO YOU?


Details | Free verse | |

Memoir of Goliath




In the habit of teasing, 
she sometimes told him 
that she wished he didn't come. 
But she always invited him. 
Goliath took solace in that, 
accepted her invitation 
knowing how it was issued.

In spite of everything, 
the years in one place, 
Golliath always wondered 
where he lived. 
The child of badness, 
the bully in his heart,
swallower of pride,
he had stood in front of minions 
who adored him, then failed them 
and didn't die or vanish. 
He walked from the 
site of his misdeeds head cast down, 
not wanting to be seen. 
He didn't hide. 
just slipped away 
not un-noticed but shunned.


Details | Free verse | |

Mixed Feelings

You wanna know why I read?
I read because books are my escape.
I read because the friends I have in books are so much truer than the friends I have in real life.
I read because in books I am as breathtakingly beautiful as the heroine in the story and not a one-hundred-thirty-three pound white girl with a black girl’s ass. 
I read because the stories are either so good, I can try to wish myself into them
Or they’re so horrid they make my life look like a fairytale.
You wanna know why I read?
I read because the parents in books don’t yell at me for failing a test that I stayed up until 1 in the morning studying for
Or tell me I’m getting cellulite when its clear that I already hate the way I look.
I read because the little brothers and little sisters in books are adorably hilarious where mine are annoyingly bothersome.
I read because when my nose is in a good book, my mind is where that book is, not in the reality that is my life.
I read because the boys in books are more kind to me than the boys in my classes at school.
You wanna know why I read?
I read because I love to read.
But you wanna know why I don’t read?
I don’t read because reading is shameful in the world I live in.
I don’t read because reading is something tedious, a chore you do simply to make the grade in English.
I don’t read because the stories in books remind me just how much my life sucks.
You wanna know why I don’t read?
I don’t read because every page I turn is another homework assignment not turned in, another failing grade to show my parents.
I don’t read because every time I read I want a snack to munch on, and every time that snack is a chocolate bar I think to myself “You fat, ugly girl, you don’t need that chocolate, you know what they say: a moment on the lips a lifetime on the hips.”
I don’t read because what boy wants a girl whose prince charming is not ever going to show up on her front porch with a dozen roses and a devastatingly handsome smile?
You wanna know why I don’t read?
I don’t read because every time I finish a book that was a new obsession, I have to find one just like it and there never is one.
I don’t read because when the hero dies, so does a piece of my heart.
I don’t read because every book I read just reminds me that I’m the freak brainiac of my class, and that’s all anyone sees when they look at me.
I don’t read because the perfect characters in books make me hate my imperfect self.
I don’t read because I hate to read.


Details | Rhyme | |

Someone, Someday

It’s so hard to start
It’s so hard to finish
It feels as if all that you've accomplished will someday be diminished 
And it won’t matter if you become somebody some day
Because someone will easily take your place 
Steal your ideas 
And make a living off you, THEIR way

It’s sad but true
Every mutha f**ka 
Will take a piece of your mind
and will somehow ultimately f**k you

not physically but mentally
making you think 
you’re not one of a kind
their getting all the fame 
while everyone leaves you behind

leaving you to feel like a failure 
people telling you to talk to God, 
he’ll have the answer

I pray, looking up at the ceiling
Hoping he’ll will give me a reason….
To keep going on with my life and my ideas
But all I’m left with are clones of my feelings
Washed up on canvases with some else’s fake veneers 


Details | I do not know? | |

Scars

Wounded by the words of hate 
For you to change I will not wait 
I guess I was the one you didn't need 
Too blinded by your ego and greed 

Its the same thing with all you guys 
Filling my head with all your lies 
Telling myself that all is well 
While words were said that bite and yell 

You never hit me; you wouldn't dare 
But you left scars if you care 
Scars that constantly try to hide 
Scars that are forever burned inside 

The days I'm unhappy to be alive 
Are days when thoughts of you arrive 
Days when i pull my hair and yell 
Knowing, of course, nothings well 

A new idea like smoking pot 
Brings my mind to other thoughts 
Scars that are forever burned inside 
Bring thoughts and attempts of suicide 

Your memories have made me insane 
Constant thoughts and constant pain 
From memories of you I cannot hide 
Bringing scars to the outside 

Knowing of course nothings well 
An apology you came to tell 
But wounded by the words of hate 
A sorry from you came too late. 

All this time you always knew 
Haunting you what i went through 
Memories of my awful life will burn inside 
Until you drive yourself to suicide 

Two lives filled with scars and hate 
Was it chance, or was it fate 
At least the pain and wounds are no more 
Two lives ended ends a war.

_By Tamara Brown_


Details | Prose Poetry | |

On Verge

Have you ever jumped in and out of your skin?
Found yourself on top of a hill with no shade to stand under, the skin around your lips and eyes starts to crack and peel.  Don’t you wish for one moment you could simply have a hand to cover the glare and give you a screen, to sooth them for just one instant and feel a breath of relief.

Have you ever bled without pain?
You are soiled red but the gates of pain are simply numb. You simply watch the drops stain. If only a hand could compress the hurt and brake the flow of this rouge river game.

Have you ever spat words of scorn? Only to discover it was a feeble attempt that bounced the daggers back at your wall of ice. They simply echo back, the acid splatters in your face. You regret what you said; you wish you were dead.

Have you ever defied your own line of fire? You’ve broken down your walls of guard and allowed trespassers to rape your morals. If only a hand could pull you back and tug you in, the rules you made would still be in.


Details | I do not know? | |

Mayella To Kill a Mockingbird

Here I am
Sitting, lying
Everyone is buying it
Yet I know who you really are
Heads up to bars
Gets drunk, come home
Then abuse me
I am the key to your heart
Or am I really?
Don’t be silly, you better watch your back
I hate you, 
I hate what you make me do
That is your cue
JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!!


Details | Rhyme | |

I Hate You, Life

I really should've known
I should've known you would do this
Took the only thing I ever loved
And ruined it
Now I'm losing it 
I feel sick
Told me why, but I'm clueless
Are you testing me
Or are you just this sadistic? 

You knew I loved her
Why can't you let me be happy? 
You think it'll blow over? 
NO
I'll never forget about her actually
I treated her like a queen
Even she would agree
She even said she loved me
And you took it away instantly

For once I did everything right
She said she was scared
But I was terrified
I lost this fight
I did do anything to you, now did I? 
It's your fault I'm dying
And it's your fault I'm alive
I can't sit near or stand you
I hate you
I hate you, life


Details | Epic | |

Pain

God gave me you, was are song.
I wonder what I did wrong.
I wish our relation would of last forever long.
It's hard to act like nothing is wrong and hard to act strong.
I hate what are friendship has become.
I hate the guy I have become.
Or became.
Without you I'm not the same.
I didn't know someone missing in my life, make my life change.
I think about you and when I pray it's hard to not say your name.
I can't stand this pain.
It's killing me and making me go derange.
They say this chapter is done and I have to turn the page.
Put I want to read it and make life fade-Mario Perez


Details | Free verse | |

Hope

Holy books says it all
You taught me how to crawl
This will never change
Never ends never fades
Dear God where you are?
Shattered piece of childish dreams
This will never change
Never ends never fades.

I can fight for all my life,
Not broken, not broken inside
Never be so frustrated,
Not going to commit suicide.

Fuc*ing faith will fall,
Mortals will stand tall
Hell and heaven are all the same
Live your life, don't die in vain

Only you and I can make 
A better world for tomorrow
Have faith in yourself
And wipe off the tears of sorrow

Make me scream, Make me cry
I'll never fail to try.
This night's has an end
No pain will remain


Details | I do not know? | |

Mido Macia 1986 - 2013


Mido Macia 1986 - 2013


Mido Macia was a 27 year old Mozambican man, working in Daveyton near Johannesburg as a taxi-driver, who was found dead in a police cell, after police savagely dragged Mr. Macia whom they had tied to their police van.

The brutal incident of Mr. Macia being dragged was caught on camera and has shocked South Africa.

The 8 police officers involved are facing charges of murder, and have been suspended from the South African Police Service (SAPS).

This poem is an angry poem that I felt had to be written, because as a society, we need to ask ourselves and each other the hardest questions about xenophobia and intolerance and violence.





Mido Macia 1986 - 2013


Death came to Mido Macia,
a savage, brutal, hellish death came to Mido Macia.


Death came to Mido Macia,
death dressed-up in the colours of authority,
as callous, vile, sadistic policemen murdered Mido Macia.


The video-footage is blood-curdling,
Mido Macia being dragged,
his hands tied behind him,
to a police van.


But death came later to Mido Macia,
death cheered, clapped, and tore into Mido Macia.


Death came to Mido Macia,
in the cells where they murdered Mido Macia.



Death came to Mido Macia,
a fuelled, cheered-on, instigated death came to Mido Macia.


We are all culpable,
every one of us is culpable,


from racist 'jokes' emailed and texted,
to self-righteous comments about the 'foreigners',


from casual dinner-table conversations,

'they take our jobs',
'they are crooks' 
the 'they marry our women' kind of lunch-time chats,


racist, xenophobic, hate-filled talk,


to beating a human-being to death in a police cell,


or on the streets of Cape Town, Johannesburg ,

and in Daveyton,

where death came to Mido Macia.



Mido Macia 1986 - 2013




Details | Free verse | |

If You Leave Me

              
That fragrant smell of you like jasmine,
When you are away, I don’t forget,
Do you forget mine?
The goodness of it I remember always,
I remember you,
Do I bring you goodness?
Will you remember me? 
A potpourri of dry flowers sit on your nightstand,
Waiting to be consumed by you,
If it talked, it would say I love you,
When you speak petals come out flowing,
When I listen to your words that drip to the floor,
I soak them up with my feet that have deep roots,
This, is completeness for me,
If you think to leave,
Then don’t come back,
I, will be gone too!
I won’t come back!
But, if you always love me,
Then, I will always love you,
If ever you should come to hate me,
I could never hate you,
I will lie down with crashing waves blanketing me,
Then, I will  be that sand particle floating effortlessly in the sea,
If you have killed your hate and look for me again,
Then look upon the fading sun in the horizon,
There, you will find me set free by the sea. 


Details | Rhyme | |

A happy man's tale

If you've heard
The things I've heard
If you've seen
The things I've seen
If you've been 
To the places I've been
You would know what I mean

I flow like the water
No cage can hold me
I live to find laughter
I live to be happy

I hate to cry 
I hate to be sad
I love to try 
I love to be mad

No boundaries define me
I know where I stand
No thoughts scare me
I wish you'd understand

I am penniless
with no money on me
I am rich with happiness
All the good things in the world are free

I don't let life bury me
I dig myself out
I don't let anyone brand me
I let myself stand out

I have no worries 
That's not a lie
I have so many memories
To keep them with me forever I try

I don't shy away from a challenge
I always think I can
I don't believe in revenge
That's why I'm a happy man

I have no enemies
I have not one grudge
I have many families
The path of friendship I trudge

If you've heard 
The things I've heard
If you've seen
The things I've seen
If you've been
To the places I've been
You would know
What I mean.


Details | Free verse | |

Prove To Me!!

Why cant u prove to me that u love me ??
stop playing games i hate it am tired of 
laying in bed and crying for u i love u but 
at time am not sure prove to me that ur worth 
staying here am not a mind reader help me!!

Prove to me that am the only one u have eyes for
how can i trust u with u word prove it to me i want 
a guy that loves me for me and not for some one 
am not prove to me that i dont have to pretend to be 
someone am not!!! prove to me that u love me help
me realize it!!

Why is it so hard for u to trust me stop yelling i cant hear 
myself think help me i dont want to hate u!! the more u yell the more 
the more i just want to run from u am tired of this !! Prove to me that 
ur worth living for that u know what ur son is worth to u please dont fake!!


Prove to me that u love me ! That these last three years have not been a waist 
that u love me prove it to me by taking me roses stop and think what i like
hold me, kiss me, pay attention to me!!?? I wake up at night wondering 
what life would be like if u would just prove to me that u do love me
that all this was not a waist of time!!!


Details | Couplet | |

Where From Here

Where from Here

How would we find light by embracing the dark
All the hate and fear men seem to embark

We know this in our hearts but still raise our sword
Gods given a peaceful loving world that we should always move toward

The world we create is from a sick and broken mind
If our egos don’t soften it will be the end of mankind

Eons of hate passed down through the ages
Taught to our children given rise to unknown rages

If we look to God we can break the bonds of this fear
And finally live as one and joyfully see clear

For life is meant to work and this is Gods plan
For there has been love in our hearts since all life began

It’s not letting God in but it’s letting Him out
For he is part of us all and you can’t live in doubt

The pulse of the universe lives in every beating heart
This loving creation that we all are apart

So lets put all else aside and make peace our dream
And rise up to faith and become one with the unseen

Copyright 2011                          4/1/2011





Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

To Write A Book

I wish this didn't hurt so bad,
Reliving these memories make me sad.
You were cold and unleashed your abuse,
And my mother helped with your excuse.
You had her wrapped like a glove,
you didn't deserve her love.
For you she turned her back on me,
That's what you wanted and she couldn't 
see.
You got everything you wanted,
Even in my dreams I am haunted.
All the raping and beatings I took,
Is this what I had to go though to write a 
book?
Everything you put me through was brutal,
And now therapy is very crucial.
I can't dream or sleep because of you,
Everything you did I remember and every 
bit of it is true.
You claim to be a man,
But as a child I had to try and dodge your 
plan.
When my husband touches me,
My skin burns and I want to turn and flee.
Are you happy with what you have done,
You taught me to hate men and run.
You didn't care if you were sober or high,
Escaping you is what I did try.
I had no one to stand beside me,
And just to live a life I had to pay a fee.
I hate you for everything you have done,
I lived a life of abuse which was no fun.
For everything you did you know you were 
wrong,
But that's okay one day I will be strong!


Details | Free verse | |

Devil Mask

"Every time, countless stares, they try to peer into my mind. Every single time, I am so tense, I cannot relax and unwind. The painful judgment unleashed down upon my own flesh and blood, Who is right, who is wrong, who is guilty and who is strong. Who is fit to rise from that which dirties our hands and body, the mud. I want to get away from you, but I fear you not. I want to watch you suffer as I rise and you rot. Do not mistaken me, I truly am just a simple, regular girl with nothing to live for. But that means that I can go to such lengths to grab your heart and crush your core. Accusing me, I was just fine with that, But now bringing down my entire family? You scummy, shameful rats! Throughout my childhood, all I wondered was "why?" Now, I don't care, when you cross my mind, I chant, "just die." Blaming us for what? Shunning us because we fought? Your manipulation of our minds will NOT be tolerated. I am the watch dog of this family and will not let you belittle and derate. I don't need your help and I promise to be better than you, This is one of the few reasons I will continue living and that fatal day you shall rue. You stole my childhood, you made me cower in fear, you broke my already fragile soul... Therefore, allow me to dispose of that heart tainted to the level of corruption, the place where your heart was placed will become a jet black hole. How sweet shall it be to see that that fragile, odd and silent girl you ignored or insulted, Will be the end of you and all for she, for ten years and still going, has cultivated, A garden of thorny roses, beautiful in all colors and tainted with your scarlet blood so saccharine, That truly this is not a heavenly virtue but a mortal sin. And yet, perhaps your demise shall not satisfy the craving I so dearly wish to be relieved of. Perhaps you should continue to live and watch me become the things you wish you could be, but for money's sake, could not do and afford to love. But that day will come and revenge will be sweet. It will surely be the sweetest thing I could ever hope to eat~! May 1st, 2013; 5:13 pm


Details | Free verse | |

A Lier's Lies

Go ahead, use me. Lie to my face, tell me it's not my fault. Tell my friends to hate me for 
a month or two. Tell them lies that are convincing enough to believe so they'll hate me 
more. Do you not know what you were doing? I was almost suicidal because I had no 
friends that wouldn't give me dirty looks, or sneer and whisper those same lies in the 
next person's ear. Call me fat, but ask me to save seats? You were lucky. Lucky that at 
the time, I wasn't in self defense class. And that, according to you, my best friend was 
your best friend. So you see, now you know; you can't go around saying that your "600 
Lb brother could walk out on the dock." But since i'm so fat. (Because i'm the one over 
there standing in the Medium size shirt.) I can't jump on the dock because i'll break it 
again. But you know what? Go ahead, say what you wish, Miss Brown. But if I were 
you, i'd watch what i say. Because i've got one big family that doesn't particularly like  A 
lier's lies.


Details | I do not know? | |

The Crushed Skulls

The Crushed Skulls

the crushed skulls

and the 

torn-off legs

and the 

single shots piercing countless heads


women, men, children
young, old, everyone just a human being

when will we tire of the senseless killing which we keep on impotently seeing


the gaping wounds soaked in blood

dismembered corpses piled high in some humid make-shift shit-stenched mortuary

who will remain to someday write, war's final obituary


for the killing goes on in the name of tribe
faith
race
religion
caste
sect

and the vested interests above all

but who really hears the whimpering sobs of a 4 year olds call

for her mother, father, brother, sister

as she lies dying, bleeding out like a gutted animal, on the stinging gravel

while we deliberate and engage and while to Geneva we always travel

to sign some scraps of paper that merely postpone the killing for a while

while the putrefying carcasses of human beings lie side by side, mile after bloody mile


war is ugly, they tell us

but necessary too

and we go to war for peace 

while the generals and the money-men and the politicians drink and dance and screw


war is ugly

it is indeed

but so are we

if we fail to see the humanity stripped away 

and peeled off the skin of that 4 year old girl

and if her cries for help we do not heed


war and guns and bombs and the very latest smart nuke

sickens me as it should us all
making us retch and puke

but who gives a **** about the bombs falling far away

we've got chores to do, margarine to buy, and take the family out for the day


war is ugly

so they tell us

while loading the magazines without much of a fuss

war is ugly

and cold and brutal and evil as the hounds of some distant hell

but who gives a **** for we have sneakers to buy and stocks to sell

war is ugly

but so are you and I

for we remain silent

as the bombs fall incessantly on

out of the open sky

shame on me and shame on us all, that much I believe is true

for our silence in the face of misery is tacit acceptance

and try as we might to inure ourselves 

I am as complicit in it all

as are you...


Details | Free verse | |

Leaving

I hate it
Knowing you might not stay
It's eating your 
Life away
Sucking you up
Like a black whole
Taking in everyone you know.
I hate it
Living on
Wondering,
If you'll be gone
God has made his choice,
We cannot share,
what this cancer is,
because I do not know
If you can stay


Details | Free verse | |

Pride

In our deepest despair
when misfortune's albatross
swoops down on us,
we let them burn... 
all we love most...

When sore and unsure
separated from false strength
and all which gave comfort,
We build brick walls...
Rather than bridges.

Yet we learn not
and hate that impulse
to seek solace when hurt,
we spurn true friends...
And hate our vulnerability.


Details | Free verse | |

You Never Knew

Oh, how I fell for you,
Fell for you a long time ago,
How those feelings changed and passed,
How those feelings got ignored everyday,
How those feelings didn't matter to you,
How you never really cared for me,
Never really was in your group of friends,
So I just sat there with secret feelings for you,
While you sat across from me, so oblivious,
Oblivious to me, never really caring,
Oh how I wished, wished I was popular like you,
Then maybe you would notice me.
Oh how I never wanted you to go away,
Never wanted to get hurt, but I have,
All because of you, I hope you are happy.
Oh how I wanted to apologize to you,
Oh how I still wishe and dream of being friends with you,
But now it is oh so late, late since you have
Announced that you were moving to a different school,
Oh how I was hurt,
Oh if you only knew how I felt,
If you only knew what I wanted to say,
And I even said that day out loud,
"No I don't want you to leave."
I spoke now, and spoke out when the chance was right,
I couldn't get out how I really felt about you,
Oh how I just walked by you to smell your sweet smell,
And to feel wanted, I have always liked the fact that you were there,
Oh how I hated it when you were gone,
But you never knew.
Never really cared about my feelings, and you even hurt me,
But I have ways of staying in contact with you,
In my heart you are a best close friend to me,
No matter what you say,
And you can hate me if you want,
But it won't change anything.
Only one person knew of the crush I had on you,
And he wouldn't tell a soul,
Oh how I was foolish, I should have just came up to talk to you,
Instead of being shy and scared,
I just didn't want to get hurt, but I did anyway,
When you blocked me,
Blocked me out of your life,
Like I never exsisted, I cried,
I must admit it hurt me a lot,
But I have ways of seeing things, and seeing just how you are doing.
You can hate me or whatever,
But it won't change a thing,
 And never change how I feel,
Just know that my heart shattered like glass.


Details | Ballade | |

WE ARE LIVING IN HELL

What life is ,is all in drama .

A stage act whereas pain and joy

are the themes in constant contrast.

Pain is for us in stage and joy is for the master who watches .

With his shiny silver rings ,spoiling in rust with blood thirst

and he out in the clear open in concealment of our ignorance,

our sinister nemesis weaves in silence

his hate into ropes his hands of fate .

To direct our course upon his trail

but who's to blame for he our master is lonely and men not smart for company

but with rings and ropes for both hate and malice

men make good puppets & he a great puppet master

and all in trance like harmony ,we stomp in stage the dance of life.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Hate Monroe

I hate this place.
Man, I have to go.
I hate the racism.
I hate the haterism.
I hate not being heard.
I hate Monroe.
Man, I hate the word.

I hate this place.
And that’s a fact.
Once I leave here
I will never look back.


written Summer 2004


Details | Free verse | |

Complaining

Complain. Complain; COMPLAIN.
They do it for all to see in disdain.
Drama, Drama, Drama, DRAMA,
Take it all back to your Mama.

Complaining about their job,
They hate it; They hate co-workers.
Getting angry, beginning to Sob,
They are all slackers and lurkers.

They Hate job; They get No satisfaction.
No benefits I receive as a Worker.
No one Here that meets Classification,
Yes, even my Boss completely Quirkier.


Complain, Complain, Drama AGAIN.
They do it everyday, Such A Sin.
Drama, Drama, Complaining to All,
Running, Running, to get another Call,

Why, Why do they stay To Complain?
They do it to be Unhappy in Vain.
Drama of Life, Work, just to COMPLAIN,
Needing Turmoil, DRAMA, on Their Brain,


Details | Free verse | |

My Emotions in Chaos

My emotions go with the wind telling me that I'll never be good enough for this or that.
My emotions always saying I'll never find "her" or that I'm too small to do anything.
My emotions always saying that my life is insignificant or that I'll never reach happiness.
Feeling alone, depressed, and never understood, I'll take a stand against my emotions, and loose once more. and be ever consumed by their dark beckoning of sadness and pain. never feeling loved in this world, and not ever feeling like someone can understand me, yet not reaching out to try to save myself. In a slum of right and wrong feeling like there's no escape. Is there hope? I like to think so, but my mind says different. I cannot imagine a world outside of my own, though I never tried. Living in a world of sin, I'll never be good enough to see clearly, or be with someone long enough to say "I love you". I hate this feeling, and can't get rid of it's terrible grasp on my life. I hate to be in public, seeing all the happy faces, unlike mine, witch I hate to see Blank and expressionless. Ever will I stay like this feeling sad and alone.


Details | Free verse | |

In The Plane

I was in the plane.

Someone asked:

-Are you comfortable?

-Oh, yes! Thank you!

He has shortened

the space between the seats.

And now? – he asked again.

He had to thank God for

we were in the plane,

otherwise I would 

smash his face,

it could be a disgrace.

Some people feel discomfort

when you feel good.

They are so happy

when you are in a bad mood.


Details | Lyric | |

Broken Heart Endings

(Verse 1)
Traveling on the never ending road,
The world on my shoulders, a normal load.
My eyes locked on the white light at the end,
When will this end, time for a descend.
I look into the eyes of the winding road of nothing,
Where will it take me, please bring me something.
I can feel you getting under my skin,
Climbing up to my heart that you made paper thin.
You were once there, and cut through the seams,
Stepping on what I cherished most, my dreams.

(Chorus)
I hate that you keep coming back,
Just leave me and that’s that.
I hated our times together and the joy you brought,
Now that my heart is gone my life is shot.
I’m coming back to being me from being your whore,
It took me days to get over your ugly core.
Now that the angels are descending,
This is your broken heart ending.

(Verse 2)
How did we love?
When I cover the bruises you said it was a simple shove.
I hate you for touching me the first time,
Making me feel so special like it was a crime.
Now that I am with the angels in the sky,
Try to touch me I want to see if you can make it this high.
I will forever be above you.
And im sorry I ever said the word love, I had no clue.
You made so many angels cry,
So here is the turn for your streak to die.
I give up on you and im done with this,
Here is to you your last and final poison kiss.

(Chorus)
I hate that you keep coming back,
Just leave me and that’s that.
I hated our times together and the joy you brought,
Now that my heart is gone my life is shot.
I’m coming back to being me from being your whore,
It took me days to get over your ugly core.
Now that the angels are descending,
This is your broken heart ending.


Details | ABC | |

You tell me to stand as you hold me down

The day I have to watch what I say 
Is the day I wake up to see that I lost myself 
Ask me why I want to run away As your screaming at me everyday 
Ask me why I can't stand my life 
When every time I stand up you push me from behind  
Tell me the world is at my feet and you will always be there 
When I look around and see my family crying to my face and scheming when I walk away 
Tell me to fix my life when my life is locked so far away from me I can't even see myself in the mirror
Now ask yourself why isn't she happy 
We promise the world when she leaves 
Only to dangle her dreams out of reach 
Why do my words mean so much to you 
When the world can see that you aren't true
But behind close doors you don't have a clue 
You told me if I was lost you would find me 
But when tears stream from my face and I tell you 
Daddy, I don't know what I am doing 
Daddy, help me through Daddy please I really need you 
A stone face looks at me and says You've been lost for years 
I'm sure you will pull through 
My hate has been mistake for strength
And your hate and my hate 
Broke a soul I can never remake 
You tell me emotion are for the weak 
We beat them down till they are on full retreat 
I lived a life of feelings and friends 
And that was when I was at my weakest 
So you pulled me back in 
But daddy can I tell you have you ever cried yourself asleep 
Because your words cut to deep.
Have you ever been so happy that you promised yourself nothing could take that away 
Just to see a knife to your throat by the person that swore to protect you 
Imagines of the past rip through my future 
As every step becomes cold and calculated 
Disappointment is easier to handle then success 
And pain is more acceptable then love 
Now keep wondering why I can't fix my life 
When the only things I can count on happening 
Is everything in this world that would bring down the strongest person 
Tell me to move forward and remember you kept  me down so long I forgot how to walk
And then explain to my friends why I Flinch away from everyone’s hands 
So how can I be better dad, when you taught me to run and hide?
I wish I could fix myself I've even prayed that one day everything would be ok
But if you and your life for me taught me anything 
It's don't hope and don't dream It's better to just pretend 
And wait until this life ends


Details | I do not know? | |

Hate

I hate the way you make me smile
I hate how you look into my eyes
I hate the way you make me laugh
I hate how you make me cry
I hate the way you stole my heart
I hate how your never going to give it back
I hate the way you ripped it apart
I hate how that's a fact
I hate the way you make me feel
I hate how your so handsome
I hate the way you make me feel smart
I hate how you make me feel dumb
I hate the fact that I can't live without you
I hate the fact I'm in love with you
I hate the fact that I want to be with you
I hate the fact that I can't find it in my heart to hate you


Details | ABC | |

LIFE

When I wake up,
what I feel is hatred.
I don't know it's hatred for what,
But perhaps I will someday.

I don't know it's hatred for what.
How life is? Or what life is?I don't.
But should we really hate life,
Because of what it is?
Should we really hate life because of how it is?

Life was created to challenges and if
They weren't there,I don't think the life metamorphosis,
Would be what it was meant to be.
What it is today.
Complete with no mistake.


Details | I do not know? | |

Short Poems

"I Have A Dream"

Was Stated So LONG Ago,
That Everybody Forgot Who Was It For
To Get Out The Position That We
Was In, But How The Hell We Going To Do That
Cause We In What We In...

B.L.A.C.K.

People Tell Me They Hate Me
Cause Who I Am
From The Color Of My Skin
To The Shoes On My Feet
I Cant Change NOTHING
But I Wish I Can
Cause Now Im
Feeling Defeat!!!!

Violence

Only Way You GOING To Live
If You Get A GLOCK.
Make Sure Nobody See Your Fear
Cover Up Your Face
 [The Gun Hold A Killer, But The Killer Is The Only One That ACTUALLY Holding The Gun.... "WHO KILL YOU???']
And Put AN End To Your Race...

How Can We Change Somebody Else
When We Cant Change Our Self,
The Community Is Going Down
As The Death Rate Going Up!!!
Only Thing You Pay Attention To On The NEWS
Is Who Died And How, What If It Was You
A Tear Struck My Face, As I Begin What
I Was About To Say.. They Love When
We Kill Eachother But Hate Our Race,
Thats Why Most Male Behind Bars
But Reflection Behind The Glass..
We Is Our OWN Extinction
I No Longer Can Identify Myself
WHO AM I????


Details | Free verse | |

This is what life is

Life is a dagger;
beautiful and fragile, but will stab you in the back.
It will take away the pain and misery,
and bring it all back.

And then you're standing on the edge,
not knowing where to go.
Your past lyes below you,
and so does your living soul

The music rang loud in your ears,
a tear rushed down your face.
And you heard a gunshot, 
as the stars danced through the pain.

Now your feelings leave your body
but your body stays on the ground.
You're depressed, stressed
Unconfessed.

You're a mess, tearing apart on the path
that leads you to the end.
And you're so close, but too far to get there.
Too far to look back at the pain and misery he caused you
And the stars, they glistened through the pain.

But your body loses control,
Flames burning through your soul,
only to be shot down by the clouds filling your mind
and refueled by the burning fire inside.


Details | Rhyme | |

LEFTovers

Left in my own thoughts Tarnished forever through nightmares Pierce me with your passions…tangle me in your knots You left me…I have no choice, but to cry… I’m breaking by the seams I drink in the sorrow… I spew up regret… I cannot drink any further I drink and drown myself – unable to hope for tomorrow I’m left in my own thoughts…I cannot walk any longer I recall my past decisions…I’m swallowed up by the echoes of fear I’m not your valuable merchandise! Don’t seek me – you wanted your dreams to come true and peace to draw near Don’t count on me – I’m not wise! I’m swallowed up by the churning sea… Leading me to my own demise I drink in the sorrow… I puke up resentment…I’m upset and cannot go on with life I douse myself in my misfortune – no one listens to me… No one catches me before I wallow… Pick me up from the murky waters Lift me up from the gutters Make me spotless and leave me the leftovers Dress me up and hand me some covers I’m trying to piece together my fragmented thoughts I can’t see a happy ending in this scene – Preserve my notions in Your thoughts and save them like leftovers… Oh, but my thoughts are thrown in the trash like rotten leftovers – left unseen Tarnished forever through nightmares My foul ideas don’t have a structure – they’re just… Tangled up knots


Details | Acrostic | |

7 4 letter words that molded my life

How I had hate for you, for a longest time in my life,
All I ever thought I was,  was the slave in your eyes,
T eaching me the lessons of life, with wrought hands,
Every time you beat me, you beat me like a man.

Pain was an illusion, I soon learned to over come,
Another beating over, well another soon will  come.
In your eyes I was a really bad child, where you had to punish me,
Nothing ever stopped you, not even my screams.

How you have hurt  me, scars I carry inside,
Understanding why for me, was a never ending fight,
Reliving all those memories, brings me much shame,
Toughen up you reckon, you must be insane.

Fearing you triggered my anxiety early on in my life,
Each day I'd come home from school, and all I wanted to do was hide,
Always alert, always on guard, always looking for signs,
Readying the will to take it again, just like every other time

Very vein you where of how I was raised, you often talked to friends,
Even beatings in front of them, putting me on display entertaining them,
In your mind you were justified, and I had to pay,
Never a care for me in mind, it's my fault you were that way.

Relentlessly  and repeatedly, I suffered from your rage,
All the time just screaming at me, because some how I misbehaved,
Getting it out of you system once, was never enough,
Enraged by the loss of yourself control, always re-sparked you off.

Love was the reason you told me, you did it cause you cared,
Over the years you ingrained this in me, So one day I could share,
Very proud of this love you were, I never went out,
Every time you thought I needed more, It was time for another bout.


Thirty four years of hate and anger it took me, before I could understand what real love was.


Details | Free verse | |

Halloween Thoughts

If I didn’t think that Halloween was so special
I would think that it was dull and quite boring
I love Halloween and all of its wonder
I think it’s the greatest holiday of the year
But if I never thought of it that way
I would think it was the worst possible day
I’m fascinated by all the devilish things around
The sincere innocence of this time astounds
If I didn’t think of all of this splendor
I would think that the innocence is just a front
A front of the evil that could be played
But I don’t think that, I believe it is a great time
A time of joyful glee and trick or treating
Dressing up in costumes and going to parties
I would hate all of this, if I thought differently
I wouldn’t enjoy the full moon, and the black cats
The witches and creatures of the deep would be my boon
But my heart is with this Holiday, everything it stands for
The fun of the skeleton dances and the bats that fly
I love to think of the Jack-O-Lanterns that smile at night
But if my thoughts would change, I wouldn’t enjoy
All of these feelings that I do love to employ
Spiders and maggots, creatures of the night
I wouldn’t stand for them, I would hate this sight
I however think what I do think, simply delightful
I will always love Halloween and all its wonder
The festivities of the season will remain in my heart

Entrant into Nancy Jones' "If I didn't think what I think, here's what I'd think" contest

8/25/2012


Details | Free verse | |

So-Called Good Christians

You have made a choice. 
You have chosen hatred. 
In our Heavenly Father, 
you have chosen not to rejoice. 
He is who spares the most awful dread. 
  
You have chosen to hate me. 
First it was the “N” word, 
the Afro comment, 
and my curly hair. 
Now you hate me 
for the religion 
that I have chosen to be. 
My faith gives me what is right and fair. 
  
I pity you for all your hate. 
But you made it clear my fate. 
A Mormon to this date, 
a Mormon forever. 
Your rage and hate 
prove my faith and 
choice of religion right. 
Your bigoted hatred
I have chosen to fight 
by giving it light. 
I want it 
in everyone's sight. 
  
Your rage and hatred is your only boast. 
But with it you are engrossed. 
Like you, your rage and hatred 
are nothing but compost. 
Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit 
gives me what I need the most. 
  
And for you, that is just 
too bad so sad. 
  


Details | I do not know? | |

Battle Lines

Battle lines are drawn with no word uttered to act,
just a couple of simple emotions pain and loss fuel  this fact.
Bloodshed on the people we thought we could trust,
but now we know this is not true, as we lay our kin in the earth’s crust.

Vengeance is the fuel that fans the emotions of loss into hate,
for now it is not them but us that will decide their fate.
Call to arms the ones that have laid your brother to rest,
and in our embrace of steel find out who is the best.

When blood stains the ground and the hate sets fire to this land,
lets see past the smoke to who will finally stand.
In heated conflict our dance of steel and flesh will warship Aries the god of war,
and we will tear one another apart until we are no more.

Through the years our generation will hate the others without cause or reason,
For as the crimson moon passes it start another killing season.
Hate will boil and bodies will come under the knife,
and we shall take liberties on each other’s lands and wife.

All this pain will usher in a mindt Earth is a living hell,
and we will become prisoners within our own hated cell.
So before you step over line and fuel what you know is to pass,
lets buried our love ones together in the same mass.

After that, talk to me and so this could never happen while we our alive,
for if we don’t, in the future it could be us that will not survive.


Details | Free verse | |

The Secret Behind Myself

Ripple, 
Ripple, 
Ripple, 
A man floats down the river. 
Find the answers to your soul, 
Discover your hearts desire in the place it all began. 
I stare into the eyes of the one I should know better than all. 
But I am a stranger in these lands. 
I search, search out the words, the question my soul craves. 
Why? How? 
How can you hate yourself when you are the center? 
You give relief to the thirsty, strength to the weak, 
You rejuvenate the cracked, the broken. 
You brighten all color, and give flavor to the bland. 
You resinate life and its many forms. 
Your ability to change form to fit the needs of all else and yet you harbor hate?
WHY DO YOU HATE YOURSELF? 
But silence. 
I see nothing. 
These waters have been tainted, mislead, polluted, and defiled. 
We wrap ourselves in pain, secrets, and despair like the fathers who've forgotten us.
These broken waters stare back at me, 
Unwavering and unknown, eyes cut deep into me, 
Its question for me is already known. 
Why? Why do you wish to die? 
Ripple, 
Ripple, 
Ripple, 
These ripples turn to waves. 
Splash. 
The answer is clear. 
A man floats down the river.


Details | Free verse | |

MIND-LESS

        

I apologize for being no LESS then myself. What was I thinking, wait maybe that’s the problem I 
was thinking, there I go again using my MIND, my bad.
I’m sorry I took that other road, u know the one LESS traveled, I know I should have followed the 
crowd but there I go again being an individual, it’s a habit.
The guilt from not giving in to peer pressure is getting to me, I hate my conscience I mean Why I 
got to have morals? Don’t nobody else got them, and if they do they shoal ain't using them. 
I hate being in the talented tenth, people expect me to do something with my life 
I have an idea (don’t tell anybody, that’s not cool) maybe if we MINDed not having a MIND we 
would spend more of our time growing instead of showing, that we are a photo copy of what is 
cool, the truth is nobodies alike, I don’t even breathe like anyone else, when I walk I do this thing 
where my head is held high it kind of resembles pride. there I go again being intellectual, forgive 
me it won’t happen again.


Details | I do not know? | |

Am i wrong...?

Is it so wrong,
That I end our friendship?
Is it so wrong
To go a thousand leaps?

Is it wrong for me to do so?
To stay away from you,
To have a firm stand
Coz I have hatred none knew

I can't help but hate for what you say
I can't help but be this way
What caused me to hate this much?
Because you said Nay!

What have you learnt really
Till it's different from the knows of me
Opposed ever so greatly
That caused arguments majorly?

It is best we go different ways,
And not associate in any day
This is all I have to say
And our friendship I shall lay

Apologies I do ask
If I hurt you heart
Apologies I do ask
Because we have to part

Gratitude I sent to you
For all the sacrifices you made
Gratitude I sent to you
For all the assistance you gave

Now goodbye I bid to you
Only histories I left behind
Unless fate states it so
We shall meet further in time


Details | I do not know? | |

For Pete Seeger Huddie Leadbelly Ledbetter and Woody Guthrie

For Pete Seeger, Huddie ‘Leadbelly’ Ledbetter and Woody Guthrie


it was a long time ago
when you put your words into song

'this machine surrounds hate and forces it to surrender' you scribbled on your old guitar

and you wielded that banjo & guitar as weapons, 

fiddling out a hail of truth

of solidarity

of angry, vehement calls for peace

you said of Leadbelly, that that Huddie Ledbetter was a helluva man

you sang and spoke through dust clouds and relief lines

you taught us all, to seek out hope wherever we can

and when they tried to call all of you goddamned reds

you sang on ever louder and louder, rattlin' their prejudices as they slept in their plush beds

you rode and you rambled and thumbed your way around

the land that is my land and your land too

for you believed all this earth was shared common ground

and when you sang of overcoming one day

the injustice and pain that you witnessed along the way

they further branded you a commie, a pinko or a nigger-lover or a jew-lover, or an enemy of the state

while your banjo and your guitars continued to surround their blind hate

'this machine kills fascists' you etched on that guitar as well

but they were all deaf, for they could not hear the tolling of the bell

'the bell of freedom

the hammer of justice

the song of love between your brothers and your sisters'

and they knew not that they were the ones who would sizzle in their own bigoted hell

and then came the marches and you were there too

with dr. king in Birmingham and Selma, and you faced their spit, their venomous rage, their clubs and sticks and knives, but you always knew

that your cause was just and that the truth must one day prevail

however long it may take, you never gave up, you sang and you marched and you strummed yourselves, victoriously, into their jail

and then they shot him, they shot Dr. King dead, as they burnt and lynched many more

yet you stood firm, you never wavered, your blood was red after all, and they could not tarnish the truth's core

and so it came to pass, that woody went on his way, to his pastures of plenty up in the sky

and Huddie too, said his last and final goodbye

and you were then one, and you may have felt alone and overwhelmed, by the battles and with all that was wrong

but then you saw that the people were with you 

as they had been, all along

and so you continued to fiddle with that old banjo

dragging it through Newport and Calcutta and Dar-es-Salaam

and through countless unknown halls in numberless unknown towns

across this earth, turning, slowly, putting smiles of togetherness, on faces that were once pock-marked with disillusioned frowns
so...
today as I jot down these poorly scribbled words for all of you
for Woody, Huddie, and Pete
I do so in gratitude, for after all the travails that you've been through
I know that you know that this world still has its fair share of hate, and of loss and of injustice and of gloom
but I also know that you know that though all the old flowers may have gone
there always will be, as there always must be,

a fresh flower somewhere, that will quietly bloom.


Details | I do not know? | |

Despair

Despair is like lack of air
Suffocating on the inside
I need to hide

Run away from my mind
Thinking im in a bind
Hoping things will get better

I wish life is worth something
Something more then nothing
Is life worth the pain

Pain doesn't always lead to gain
Get high to forget life
Life always leads to the scythe


The Reaper will come for you
Who knows what paradise is like
Hopefully better then now


Details | Free verse | |

Manic

Breath stolen breeds sharpness
Borne backward into infantile shrieks
The spinstress of sinew waits bated
For abhorrent heat
Of combustive, collapsive
Crossfire from echoing throat
Or burnt-bridge lungs
A visceral nymph thoughtlessly thieves
On Benedict tongue
Thrashing in maddened pace
Too shrill a manifesto
Skeletal soldiers charge
A red hill
Unsteady, uneven, not ready
Frenzy, not frolic
I am not a goddess
There is something to fear
I am something, I fear


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate That

I walked outside my house.
Into the driveway
And thought
"You were just there yesterday,"
A few hours back.
I was having the best time ever with you.
But now I realize its gone.
And I hate it.

I hate that I won't see you tomorrow
The same as today.
I hate that I'm crying when I should be excited.
I hate that you probably don't think I'm telling the truth.
But I am.
Becaudse you're the best thing that's ever happened to me.
And I love that.
And yet, it hurts to know that I won't see you again
For a while.
I hate that strong spurce of emotions.
But I love that I can feel them again.
I really do.


Details | Rhyme | |

A LOVE - HATE RELATIONSHIP

We were so young, when together we came
Since losing your love, I've not been the same.
Even now, thinking of it makes my guts churn
I know I made too many wrong turns.

I loved you so deeply, but never understood
That you were my life and all that was good.
Then when things started to come unglued
You took the step, and a divorce from me sued.

I tried to talk you out of it then
Not knowing how I would live, or where, or when
But I crossed that line somewhere with you
As the lawyers lined up to get their due.

You made me learn to hate you at times
Forgetting the walks and talks we had in the pines.
You asked me not to fight you in court
"Just sign the papers." was your exhort.

You didn't want me to hear how I made you loathe me
So much now, you just wanted to be free.
I still loved you enough not to want to hurt you more
So, I gave in, signed the papers, you got what you asked for.

But in doing so you turned my love into hate
As ever since then, I would think of our fate.
When we first met at that dance in May
When all seemed so new, so airy, and gay.

You taught me how to really love you
You taught me how to hate you, too.
Now, so many years later I still see
Your smile at times, looking back at me.

But your dark side is there which you can't hide
Your fear of being left alone still lurks inside.
Because the love, the hate, the loathing too
All form a fine line, I guess that is true.

You may not know how I feel about you now
I know if we met, there would be no row.
But there is one who's respect is still hard to place
I see him each day, when shaving my face.


Details | Cinquain | |

Find Love

Find Love 
Deep Dull Gray, Black Shiny Sea 
Love to Hate 
Trading your hate for love
A thin line still ….


Details | ABC | |

LOVE A-Z

A life full of love,
Brought  from heaven above,
Calling to each and every heart,
Doubt and truth spread worlds apart,
Even hate is swept away,
Fear and evil cannot stay,
Gather together the good and the right,
Heal the weak so they can take flight,
Isolate from the jealous mind,
Joyfully follow the caring and kind,
Kill the wrong and terrible thought,
Live for everything that love has brought,
Managing life and able to lead,
Never forgetting what others may need,
Open the heart to everyone,
Pray for things that must be done,
Question those who hold a grudge,
Remember to forgive instead of judge,
Show the way for those who are lost,
Teach them of hate and what it can cost,
Understand the hope and faith to give,
Victory to those who believe and live,
Wrongs erased for family and friend,
XO's to symbolize the love to lend,
Year after year keep the peace the same,
Zero time for war or blame.


Details | Rhyme | |

THE SOLDIER'S WIFE

             THE SOLDIER'S WIFE

                          Love
                     Lies bleeding
                    On the snow
                  Message from a guy
                       You know
                   You played with
                    His heart and head
                      It's all your fault
                    the life you've led
                        i loved him too
                      but he chose you
                        i hate you for
                  what he went through
               Wounded soldier back from war
                        As he entered
                           his own door
            Heard sex crooning ---grunts of man
              Turned his back—away he ran
                   Put a bullet in his head
                Now you cry that he is dead
              stop your tears -- can't be undone
               hope your peace -- forever gone
                     what made you treat
                        A good man so
                             Love lies 
                              Bleeding
                                on the
                                 Snow


Victoria Anderson-Throop   12/01/2012


Details | Rhyme | |

Hold On

How do you hold on to the one you love when that’s not all you’ve been dreaming of?

Is it wrong to wish for something new or is this just something I have to do?

The number of times I tried to go and then you fed me stories and put on a show.

I hear the words you’re trying to say but I’m really not sure I want you to stay.

I’ve been trying to get you to comprehend that this is life, it’s not pretend.

It’s not a game of love and hate it’s about my dreams, my hopes, my life and fate.

I want to live and explore my life and I’m really sorry I can’t be your wife.

I wanted a baby but from no other, I wanted to be your child’s mother.

I wanted a life we both could live, I wanted much more than you could give.

I hoped for a miracle but you couldn’t see, the hurt I was feeling so lonely, just me.

I hate to say this without a doubt but I’ve lost all hope that this will work out.

I’m so afraid to be alone for this broken heart wasn’t made of stone.

You say you love me so if it’s true, then please just do what you said you’d do.


Details | Imagism | |

Hate

I hate my life because its mine 
I hate my life because I cant change it
I hate my life because I cant give it back 
I dont want it, I dont lke it, I wish t wold go away
But it wont, it wants to stay, not to change 
but to torture me until death.
I want to end it, to make myself gone but
I dont because Im a wimp and Im scared.
I hate myself because I cant change me 
I hate myself because I cant give myself away
So Ill just have to keep on hating myself and my life
until I die.........


Details | Bio | |

That slave name

I hate my name,
I didn't choose it,
it may have meant something in the past,
until they abused it.

I hate the way it looks,
and the way it sounds,
every time I hear my name,
my head drops to the ground.

I hate the way it makes me feel,
so much anger inside,
Murray was the slave,
guess what that slave died!!!

I call myself Muzz,
this is me,
I've rid myself of that slave name,
for my own sanity.

M.Mahauariki © 2012











Details | Verse | |

Is There Still Good in You

You beat me down,
Told me not to cry,
Not to show weakness.
You showed me no sign,
Of ever loving me,
Showing no sympathy.
You hit me down again,
and just my luck,
You didn't give a crap,
But I still believed there was good in you.

I let you hit me, 
Thinking it was alright.
You told me not to cry,
And to hold it all inside,
But I let a tear fall,
And then you saw,
Now I fell with it.
But I still believed there was good in you.

Days grew longer,
As life got shorter.
I may have only been eight,
But I still had a great ache.
I didn't understand what was happening,
Why did I keep ending up in the clinic,
With scars on my wrists?
Because you hadn't loved me enough.
You crushed my spirits,
And put a hole in my heart.
There is no good in you.
I don't know what my father saw in you.

Now I'm stuck with a twisted mind,
And can't make sense of any kind.
I cannot find,
Who I really am,
Because you never gave a damn.
So now you see,
How I have come to be.
Just a lost puppy,
This is me.


Details | Blank verse | |

Help me

I walk around these halls,
Feeling more dead than alive.
I don't want to be here at all,
I'm just praying I'll survive.

Nothing makes sense to me,
Everything is engulfing me.
Will you save me from myself
I'm scared of myself.

I'm scared of what I'll do,
I'm scared of what will happen
I'm lost in this world of fear.
I don't think you can save me.

I'm too far gone,
There's no going back,
The pain has just begun
Where am I at?

What world am I in,
Where have you taken me?
Why can't I awake from this,
This is a nightmare, please help!

This is a mistake,
I don't belong here,
I think I'm dead.
Is this actual hell?

The devil took me away,
He calls this my home.
I do not like it here,
But I have no choice.

I can't get away from him,
He won't let me go.
I don't understand this,
What did I do to deserve this?

~k.t.


Details | Narrative | |

Same Time, Same Place...

Same time
Same place
Different color
Of the face

Same K-12 system
Same university
Different college
Who gained 
More knowledge?
Who excelled?
Who got more hell?

Same job
Same school
Same students
Same certification
Different degrees

Who stayed 
On their knees?
Both of us
Yes, indeed.
Who achieved
Honestly?
Well let’s see!

Same time
Same place
Different color
Of the face
I made it 
By God’s grace
You are 
A Satanic disgrace.

You are the
Face of hateful
Hypocrisy
I settle for
None of your
Fallacious foolishness
And malicious mediocrity.

Same hometown
I keep it real
You a damn clown
God’s giving you 
A furious frown

A lazy witch
Probably born rich
Living in the sticks
Killing nature’s beauty
Just to get away
From people like me
An earth killer
Fake teacher
And destiny stealer
A true thriller
Makin fake scrilla

I worked hard
While you pressed bricks
Storing awful ATP
To make sure
You got the best of me
And people from my 
Community.

My adenosine triphosphate (ATP)
From glycolysis in my body
After Krebs cycle
Gives off love
While yours come
From hate
We’ve had the same bodily
Processes similar chemical makeup
I just have more melanin
You act the way you act 
Because of your grandfather’s mistakes

 I hate to see your fate 
If you don’t change
You are devilish
And deranged
I know your game
Your name
We’re from the same turf
You and I 
Are carbon based products
One tries hard daily to be just
So that when the minister
Says ashes to ashes
And dust to dust
That I get the reward
I deserve
You got my reward
I still work hard
My ATP
Detests the enemy

It ain’t fair 
That we walked in the same place
Respect you received
And hate slapped me in the face
Walking around with on your face
Did a dissertation on me
If I looked like you 
With my knowledge 
At 23 I would have had
Ten PhD’s.

Girl please you got the nasty woman disease
Get on your knees for the right reas’
Pray to us Jes’
Save me from being a real bigot
And sometimes on the sly
Help me to love you
And all your creatures
And accept diversity

You need help with that dirty blond hair
Pony tails sticking in the air
Depicting your true savior 
Not mine that will catch the one’s
That are still alive and in Him 
Up in the midair.


Details | Rhyme | |

Your lust an infection

My heart right now so low.
Which makes it so easy for these words to flow.
A pain so deep that it cuts into my soul.
My soul so blackened like coal.
Im losing myself and all control.
But right now my fingers and mind work as a whole.
This thing that i feel makes my heart play the smallest role.
Becuase now its all hate in my blackened soul.
All i do is give you affection.
But it goes unnoticed, not the smallest detection.
Which makes this hate spread like an infection.
I dont know what to fow i havent a selection.
I feel we have such a disconnection.
My feelings and your thoughts make this a hard intersection.
My memories of old days make this a bad resurrection.
Resurrection of all of my imperfections.
I just want some love to be my protection.
But you just cant feel the same connection.
So i guess that leaves me with nothing but introspection.
And lets me see my heart is in the wrong direction.


Details | Free verse | |

Sardonic Edge

                  Sardonic Edge 

When you have money people love you
Even strangers want to see you, save you 
And help you through your days
Subtle imperfections cling on psyches cliff
This is not a trick…. This is not a glitch
If only you would look 
Take the problem as you could 
Less lightly…..You should simply not exist
Nudge a nerve to sign that will 
And give us what is ours
As condemning fingers deflect
Point your way
Lingering thoughts stick to you
Like yesterday’s sweat
Friends and family pretend to love you 
That keeps you safe
But not from insults and pretentious threats
Fear fills in every day behind your back
Fed by derision, suspicion and greed
Designed by those who hate you along the way
It's the new fashion that never fades or dries upon the line 
The stake in the heart delayed for better weather
Prevailing winds designing the perfect crime
Strong wills wait for satiation, a little later, is a little better
So say those hiding under rocks
Friends and family pretend to know you
Pretend to care
The sardonic edge comes out 
You’ve become the center of attraction and attention
Lost in your own anonymity
Why should you have a lotto ticket and not me?!
The whispers come to life
No one gave you permission to be alive
Leave that part to us
We have skills and ways to attend to you
In our own sardonic ways
It would be our pleasure to (end you….)…oops!.. I mean help you end your days in peace
That is, if that’s ok with you
Please remember to sign the deed
Then we’ll see what we can do


Details | Rhyme | |

All out of words

Just a man
Is all I am
Do what I can
Its not a sham
I am no more
You are no less
An even score
A tie I guess
I have loved very easy
And I have hated hard
I did till I’m dizzy
Though never been barred
A love hate relationship
Is love to hate each-other
The apple of my eye
I picked from a tree
With one more try
Could wind up with three
The oyster of my world
Came out of a shell
A stone can be hurled
To ring from a bell
The gold that I seek
Did come from an ore
The boat that did leak
I steered with an oar
Repaired all the holes
So I can go far
Paid all the tolls
While driving my car
Dumb as I am
I still try to write
Hit with a bam
Part of the fight
Cows are in herds
I cannot believe
All out of words
Going to leave


Details | Verse | |

Sacrifices

Needless explanations
For those who hear nothing
But themselves.
Eternal sacrifices that
Led finally to the end.

Maybe you still think that
It is worth it.
But I don't need to hear
Your points of view.
I will leave you dying slowly
By your own, and
I don't mind if there is
Any way to change your
Sufferings.
Because there is nothing
Good that you've deserved.
****
When feelings died
They are dead.


Details | Rhyme | |

Love All

Why Hurt me?
Only to add to my pain?
Is your own pain all you see?
I dont want hatred to remain
Why can't you just love me?

Must we repeat discord forever
And never learn just to love one another?
All not just a few,
All the pain inflicted...
If we only knew.


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate Myself

I hate myself for letting me go,
To the extent of hurting myself.
I hate myself for setting me up,
For a fall which was bound to happen.
I hate myself for giving what I had,
And expecting to want anything in return.
I hate myself for bringing me to this place,
I vowed I would never let me go.


Details | I do not know? | |

Inner Fear

Your in a room.
There are no windows.  No lights. 
Your tied up and blinded by a fabric.
You hear a voice.  It says your name.
You try to scream.  Your mouth is tapped.
Are you going to die?
Warmth stings your chest.  Pain appears as if called from the bottem of hell.
You start to hear a man's laughter.  Sickly and dangerous.
You feel weak.  Your body starts to grow numb.  
Why is he doing this?
He speaks again.  He says your name.
You feel his breath kiss your face as he talked.
The smell of his drink makes you dizzy.
You feel a blade on your neck.  
Then....You feel nothing.


Details | Free verse | |

Regrets

This anger that is inside me now is tearing me apart,
    After all this time I find you had been lying from the start.
I am hurting so much from the pain you have caused me,
    By using your beauty and charm so I would not see.
All the lies and deceit while loving you and giving all my trust,
    I will expose your evil ways and mean doings this is a must.
Never  should another endure what you have put me through,
     This I will make sure of if it's the last thing that I ever do.
How dare you break my heart and then treat me so bad ,
      It  takes a lot to upset me but girl you have made me mad.
You've no idea the rage that I am carrying inside me now,
      I will make you regret this one day I will figure out how.
If it's the last thing I do I am going to make a example of you,
      How and when I am not sure of but trust me it will be soon.
You walk away from me as if you've done nothing wrong,
      Believe me girl I will show you and it wont take me long.
Seriously do you think you can get away with treating me this way?
      So wrong you are for that and you will know this one day.
That deceiving the man thats so in love with you ,
      Is something you are going to learn not to ever do.
Why would you ever do this to a man that loved you so,
      I guess this is something that I am never going to know.
This anger inside that is slowly tearing me apart ,
       Blinded by your ways I was completely in the dark.
Just one more thing I must say to you before I go ,
       You are evil  and that's something everybody will know.
TAC
   


Details | Rhyme | |

Torn Pride

 I sit here, once again with tears in my eyes
A sad individual, a waste of a life
How can i feel like this, I'm suppose to be proud
A sunny day, unreachable by clouds
 
But I've fought, I've fought so hard
These emotions won't stay away
Each time my heart falls short of it's goal
And tears want to run down my face

I feel as if I'm all alone, no one shares my pain
This sadness, this weakness, I'm so ashamed
I tell myself to toughen up, stand strong
But my pride has been beaten for too long

I sit here, broken and torn
Listening to songs as i morn
I have no wish to try again, for i have yet to heal
But i know i can't stop what my heart feels

I cry saddened by my unaccepted love
I cry, angered because that's not what a man does
I tell myself its ok to cry
But i hate this feeling, i hate this life


Details | Free verse | |

damaged goods

rolling over in burnt blankets of mistakes & 
seething at the mere mention of the name that
echoes most recently through the maddened mind
like a gong being dragged through a city street
chained to the tail-end of a 4x4 that has no 
particular place to go.

rotting in the bowl with mold all furry,
being torn apart by fruit flies & other insects making
new condos & apartments in the heart &
where does it end?  
as the wreckage piles up like old toys in the garage &
all the animals from the forest come in to make themselves 
at home,
much like the flies & insects in the fruit bowl,
it suddenly seems like everything alive
is having more fun than the thinker that is 
presently thinking.

pus forming in the infected cuts &
the bruises get bandaged again &
as one party runs clear out through the field 
away from the other,
another connection is eradicated & 
another individual gets one more notch towards
a lifelong complex.

the feeling that one is not good enough &
that one will never be good enough &
that one doesn’t deserve to be happy &
therefore one begins to learn to hate happiness &
then one begins to hate others who are happy &
then one begins to die inside watching them parade around the
world (as if they are completely untouchable &
nothing can happen to them) &
then one is dead inside.


Details | I do not know? | |

My Last Farewell

Before I Let You Go There's One Thing I
Need You To Know Your The Biggest Mistake
I Ever Made. So Consider This My Last Farewell.
Your Feeling Of Hate Is Now Mutual. I Hate Who
You've Become. I Hate The Things You've Done.
Now This World Is Just A Fkin Hateful Place , But You'll 
See Me With A Smile On My Face


Details | Rhyme | |

Invisibly Invisible

Invisibly Invisible

Jealousy is a weak emotion
while you're sinkin'
I'm still floatin' and if I'm sinkin'
I'm still coastin' cause my God keeps my life goin'
to the extreme, you gotta feel this and know what I mean
and if you can't comprehend, you can get the 411 through him.

How can you judge me, when you don't even know me?
You think that you know me 
cause' one time, you so-called spoke to me...
My inner beauty so in depth with God's spirit
my outer beauty speaks to you 
Close your eyes...
Can you hear it?

Your cars on rims can't compare to his;
Gossip in the beauty shop...
about that girl that speaks of God all the time
seems like she can't stop 
You look me up and down
I smile at you and you frown...

Could it be the God in me that keeps you around?
The way you hate me, I could never hate you
The saddest part about it, you don't want to hear the truth
but it is just this...
He loves you as much as he loves me
pure crystal, nothing fake that can break
like shining stones, all so mythical 
so could it be that's why you look at me and I'm invisibly invisible.




By: Aleasha A. Martin


Details | Blank verse | |

Reflection In Depression

A dreamer, words on the page.
Perhaps I am the empty book,
Pages begging to be written on,
A chapter is coming, but here we are,
Change and travel on the way.
Fear of the change is slowly
Replaced by the need to escape.
Oh, escape!
The need to run away and be free,
A wild horse or a cat of some sort.
A free, running creature, trapped
Far too long inside the box,
The box too confining.
Words spilling out, a rushing of 
self onto this white, now colored page.
Words, only swirls and lines and 
Drawings; how really is it you
Understand?
Rain, lovely, fresh and a freedom.
I want to melt away into the rain,
Pour out onto the ground and 
Spread out all over everywhere.
To melt away and cling to you.
I see you, outside, and I, as a raindrop,
Would land on your face,
The closest I’ll ever be to you.
I’d stay, Love.
You always hope they’ll come after you.
To catch, ask you what’s wrong,
Persistently till you tell.
But they never do.
Never care enough and 
If you die,
It doesn’t matter.
This, the greatest story,
Is the cruelest of them all.
The beautiful are ugly and
Alone because they are
Truly beautiful.
The dreamers are given wings
So that they will fall much farther
And break far more bones.
They’ll fall from the sky, 
Beautiful stars falling in the sky. 
The Beast has taken everything from me,
And then given me a thousand false hopes.
I’m stuffed full of false hopes.
I myself simply am a false hope,
Relyed on by other dreamers.
When I break, then they
Will fall as well.
Scars, oh scars of my broken self,
Feeding the Beast.
There are no true friends.
They are false as well, bridges
Breaking slowly, and I will fall.
I always do, having dared to
Keep hoping.
Friendships are impossibly
Frail, but I continue to hope
In those too.
Hope itself seems to be a Beast.
It is the worst liar.
As is fellowship: I don’t actually
Belong.
It’s all just a lie.
Each day is a lifetime,
And a week is far too many 
Lifetimes for me to handle.
Change, oh change, I once resented
You but now I long for you,
I beg you, please take me with you.
I want to be a raindrop, lifetime
So short but so full,
With no regrets,
Only a living of life.
I wish you were here,
All of you so lost to me 
Forever.
No, false hopes, leave me.
You were wolves and now
You must leave the carcass
To finish rotting.
The ravens,  that is, anything 
Else besides false hopes,
Need their fill as well,
And though you have 
Gorged yourself,
There’s still some flesh
On these bones
To be ripped off and eaten,
Destroyed.


Details | I do not know? | |

Free

Opening up was the best thing I could have ever did
All those things that made me & embarrassed me as a kid
You never looked at me different because my past was shameful
Talked to you about some of the things in my life that we’re still painful
I am human, filled with emotions and lots of anger
Hate filled my heart to the point I wanted to lock it in a chamber
How I feel is as real and emotional as it gets
Stress consumed me for years, felt like I needed a cigarette
Needless to say the battle has been done
I’m still standing and breathing so I must have won
The ultimate prize of keeping my sanity and myself free
Love the fact my past is so messed up… It really made me
You I give the ultimate credit for finding my inner voice
Felt like with you I have to write, it really leaves me no choice
I am a woman, blemished, flawed and tortured by life
Invisible wounds on my heart from being cut by life’s knife
But still I stand and hold my head up High
I only have one life and I refuse to give up and Die
I am woman, lover, and loyal friend till this life takes me away
I only wish I could have told you all the things I wanted to say
I understand that people are placed in life for all types of reasons
With you I guess it was only meant for a season
Learned a lot about myself with the help of you
You embraced me with ease and had no clue
Life had killed me, left me emotionally dead
Then I met you, felt like the best thing I never had
The make up of me is so complex, guarded & sad
I’m learning to let go of it all, no more hanging on to the past
All those people that did wrong by me can officially get a rash
Living for me now so I gives no care how you feel
This is me, uncut, uncensored… I feel the need to be real
No longer taking my past and feeling sorry for how it was
Living life to the fullest… Just like everyone else does
Don’t feel sorry for me I am no longer a victim, I’m Free
Just letting the world know I am no longer ashamed of being me
The mirror I used to run from I now embrace
The hate that was once in my heart has now been replaced
That frown that I always wore because if hurt to smile
I keep this smile permanently embedded and it’s going to be here for a while
I am no longer sad…. I’m so focused on my life and moving forward
Carrying all that hate and anger around was such a burden
Free..Free.. Free from life’s tortures and Pain
Standing on my own two feet with a smile is how I will remain


Details | Rhyme | |

ROAD OF MIRRORS

Walking through a path set in advanced,

Just going through the steps I'm suppose to dance.

Turning left and right hoping for a miracle,

Feeling like I'm being drained by every particle.


Seeing and feeling stares from unknown people,

They wander what's next for me, what's the sequel?

Minding not their business but invadeing in mine,

Hoping my light dims and theirs doesn't out-shine.


I see smiles left and righ but I know better,

I know they smile now but they'll hate later.

We'll shake hands and say we're friends,

But at the first problem our fridnship ends.


I look around and see mirrors facing in all directions,

They only show what I want to see, not their true intentions.

Where their is hate and dislike I see smiles,

The road of mirrors runs for miles and miles.


Details | Rhyme | |

Pride

Eyes narrow,
Eyes cold,
Smile cruel,
Dignity sold.

Shall not look away,
Dignity lost,
Eyes angry,
Smile of frost.

Head held high,
Looking ahead,
No one  exists,
World is dead.

Done no wrong,
Had not lied,
Told not truth,
Dignity tried,
All is lost,
Within their pride.


Details | I do not know? | |

Hated Life

Why cant I do anything right?
Why do I always cause the fights?
Why do I make him hate me?
Why do I always hurt him?

I don’t wan to screw things up
I don’t want to fight
I don’t want him to hate me
I don’t want to hurt him

I always mess things up
When things are going great
I always mess things up
No matter what I try not too, 
But I always screw things up

My life is wasted
All I do is hurt
Nobody loves me anymore
They only hate now
I can’t go on like this

I need to run
I need to hide
I need to fall…
Fall so that nobody sees me…
Fall so that nobody misses me….
Just fall off the face of the earth…
I’m sure nobody would notice

That’s not what I want
I want to live
I want to have a life
I want to have that with him
I want to be his wife

I want to move away 
Taking him and his children
Take them all away from this mess that we call “home”
I want to move away
So that we don’t have to worry anymore
So we don’t have people stalking us 

I love him more that life itself
I miss him when he’s gone
I hate the thought of losing him
It would kill me if it came true

I can not live without him
Not after all this time
I wish to make it through this
Just like all the other times
We’ve been through things way worse than this
Can’t we just have one more try?
I need you in my life, Chad
Or I will be no more.


Details | Verse | |

Insanity is magic-love is khaoz-hate is music

INSANITY IS MAGIC LOVE IS KHAOZ AND HATE IS MUSIC



i love to dance for the one who knows me best is me
i love to be passionate on life about life because that is lacking
tell me that you feel differently 
do tell me what goes through your mind
insanity is magic because it is truth at its finest
yet those who are indifferent can not conform to diversity
making insanity some type of disease manifested by irresponsibility
when truth is that the best things were by accident by chance or plain out fate
love is khaoz because without it you would be a robot in a factory following commands
following not leading 
you would conform to roads laced with repetition... roads bleeding 
hate is music ... turn on your tellie your radio your internet
hate makes the world function or did you already forget
dance the controversy dance the gossip dance the worries away
stomp on indifference and make the world pay
simply by doing nothing but two step here and there
i am a feminist i am free
i am a poet the world will hear me
i want common sense to be practiced in the branches of law
i want common sense to be the foundation to everything without it everything will continue to 
fall
i love one with my heart but she runs from me
i want to explore the world for knowledge not for conspiracy
i am a wild card in a deck of conformity
i am a joker if you will 
i will play my way... no matter what your deal
insanity is a place i reside 
be it on land or in the air
love is what stirs my ambition 
because hate is so known
i carry it under my feet... as i stomp
and watch people just stare




Details | Free verse | |

my pen and paper

My Pen and paper.

Tonight I will hate him
Tonight I will cry
Tonight I will hate every being
I’m not scared to lose myself
Hatred is the love of his life.

I hate him, I hate him
He will never be in my life
My life feels nothing, I feel like nothing
He feels stupid for never knowing me
I’m just not a child with no father
I’m a child who will never have a father.

He hurt me, im so hurt, I cry every night
My mom reminds me of him
They both deserve nothing from me
I owe them nothing
This is my life; I’m going to be happy
My life is this pen and paper
My life is in my words
My life is written on my lips and my mind
My life is when I’m writing my thoughts
My life is happy
I’m a very happy person.


Details | Free verse | |

Catch my fall

Catch my fall,
spring your palms 
before I hit 

catch my memories
soaring from
my pockets

the edge is drenched
with ice 

the past is not real,
letters just tucked
in your dressor 

break your back
as you catch my fall;
we'll lay cripled, 
drinking to the sun

sturdy feet I dont
envy.
too monotone 
too plain 

there is no chance in a 
steady walk

slam the gas,
run on the ice 
looking beyond the 
edge 

catch my fall as I 
cannot surpress 

coffee,work,gas,
dinner,coffee, stress

scream
"let me the **** out of this
snow globe"

bite and claw at the glass.

catch me as my 
fall is slowly getting
vast


Details | Rhyme | |

Snuff

Bury all I held dear in this tomb
Walk away with innocence, infected in this room
Your smiling face is nothing but a cage
Something to keep me inside while I'm left to stew with rage again

So if you hate me, let me die
Don't keep me begging for my life
Our situations were so grim
I saw your patience wearing thin

I remember life without this pain
When I could smile at the rain
You make my life a dark hell
These hopes I wish I could let go
You always clung too tight to let me go

I still think about the love we shared
Remembered a time long ago, back when you still cared
It's hard to face a life without your light
But all of that was torn apart when you refused to fight

So breathe your lies into my heart
And leave my body torn apart
It's not like anyone's there
You've left me hanging in thin air

I know that I was such a fool
But there's no reason to be cruel
You brought me up to tear me down
I wish I could just burn with this whole town

So pour this dirt into my grave
It would be all you ever gave
You never wanted any help
You sold me out to save yourself

I only wish I could hate you
Then maybe this world wouldn't be so blue
But the time for that has come and gone
My blackest night is now your brightest dawn

My blackest night is now your brightest dawn


Details | Rhyme | |

Frustrated

I don’t get it
The nicest people with the biggest hearts get treated like poo
Its as if everyone is acting like everything is okay like it’s a skit
The negativity gets old and dies off, yet the hatred seems to transmit
Is it that hard to put away any animosity you have towards someone and commit?
In reality in the end we all can benefit
Just think……
Where is the love in this world anymore?
Teens still being bullied and girls still getting called whores
People hating themselves for being different, they spend their times at the liquor store
Late nights, asking themselves why, drinking so much they hit the floor
Having an end result of having bruises and being sore
It seems we are all still fighting our own personal wars
Yet there is nothing wrong beating your own drum and wanting to explore
There shouldn’t be any hate or judgment anymore
Let’s once again help one another come together and help restore
So in the end we can all rest ashore 
I hate the world we live in today 
The violence, the judgments, the assumptions, the hatred, and the betrays
Seeing other people who are different having to repay from all the disarray 
Blacks, whites, shorts, obese, Americans, Natives, Hispanics, Gays
We are all different like papier-mâché, and that’s okay
Yet we are all the same on the inside, all one way
So put all the drama behind us, and let’s be a good model on the display

Any thoughts or comments?


Details | Light Poetry | |

Missing You

I never thought that missing you would hurt me so bad. Missing you hurt's me in so many different way's that there are not enough words in the world to explain how I feel. I never thought that missing someone like you would make the pain stay. You left me and the hate and the love all left, but the pain of you leaving kept me missing you, and wanting you to remember that I am someone who needs to be loved by you. Missing you keep's me wondering if I will ever get the chance to see you again. When I am missing you it make's me feel like life has given up on me. And missing you is not worth throwing my love away. Because I have someone to fill that whole were you once were. And I know he shouldn't but your gone and I have worked so hard to forget and forgive. But you are the one person Iwould never forgive. I can't even forget who you are and what you have done. I need to forget who you are and what you have become. I can't live my life with someone like you. But I'm sorry just please leave me alone and never talk to me again. I hate you and I will never love you again.


Details | Blank verse | |

Don't be Upset

If I told you 
that I hated you,
you would cry,
and I hate it when you cry,
because then I cry too

So if I was hurt
because you were hurt
then maybe 
I don't really hate you.
Maybe I hate what you've become
and what you are becoming

As the days pass on by
you can see that your little girl
is becoming a woman
and it hurts to let go
you want to hold on tight

Sometimes so tight that she's gasping
for the world around her
she knows that it is just for her protection
but what would happen if she didn't experience things 
on her own

You may tell her what's wrong and what's right
but the truth is
when there's too much right being done
she turns to wrong for answers

so no matter how tight you hold on
she's still gonna learn on her own
and no matter how much you tell her you love her
she's still gonna tell you she hates you

because it's wrong.


Details | Free verse | |

Pain

Pain…
A word with a thousand meanings
Used to express situations 
Full of agony mixed with suffer
Pain…
An adverb used to fulfill ache
A result of betrayal, lies, and disloyalty
A mask of cruelty, used to describe 
People, times, hurt
Without pain, without love, without hate
A world isn’t a world
These cause the continuation of the universe
Cause the break of some people 
And the patience of others
Without pain there is no hate 
Without hate there is no love
Without love there is nothing…
You can never understand pain
Unless you experience it 
You can never confront it 
Unless you have a heart
Build with courage, filled with love
You can never abandon it 
Cuz it will hunt you down 


Details | Free verse | |

Help, Ache, Scream, Mirror Me, I Am Only Human

Help.
Wish for it all you want, its not coming, you are all alone.
Ache.
The feeling inside your heart you can do nothing about with the fear you've shown.
Scream.
Is what you feel like doing but no noise comes out, 'cause the pain is too much, isn't it?
Helpless.
You've made yourself this way. Painfully anxious about what is ahead of me. . . I am this.
Myself.
Is who I have to blame for everything I have done.
Mirror Me.
It is my own refection I look to when searching for whose at fault when everything goes wrong.
I.
Do not hate myself but I am close to who I'd hate to be.
Human.
Someone who isn't me and will never be the same as me.
A break.
Give me one, I make mistakes, I'm just one person in a world of hate and I'd rather just be happy.


Details | I do not know? | |

Play on Words

I can strive to do my best. I do not regret life. I care for my own and others Never shall I forget those I love I shall forgive Never
Let us view the other side
I fail at everything I do I hate my life as it is I don't care for anyone I will forget those I love I shall harbor revenge always
Let us read it once fully through Now, we will read it backwards
Always I shall harbor revenge I will forget those I love i don't care for anyone I hate my life as it is I fail at everything I do Never I shall forgive Never shall I forget those I love I care for my own and others I do not regret life. I can strive to do my best.


Details | Lyric | |

GOOD BYE SUMMER

GOOD BYE SUMMER




Good bye, summer, well, it's time to go,

Good bye, summer, well, it's time to go.

I hate to rush you, but you really must go

say Good bye, summer, good bye!


Well, it's the middle of September;

I’m just tired of you and your heat.

Oh, I hate to rush you, but you can’t

stay




Repeat Refrain


Now, autumn and winter,

Might hate it if you stay here too long,

One shake and we'll part, and you'd better 

get going, although you served a purpose.



Final Refrain:


Good bye, summer, well, it's time to go,

Good bye, summer, well, it's time to go.

I hate to rush you, but you  really must go

Good bye, summer, good bye!


Details | Lyric | |

Dead in My Heart

There are many things in my head
but there’s only one type of dead
Dead in the heart
I’ve been loving too hard
with that so easily bruised part
I need to make it new (I need it renewed)
I need to have it whole
I need it happily fulfilled
I need these scars
to fade away
but it’s an impossibility
due to my inability
to forget
I wish I could

I hate the way
I’m only happy on cloudy days
I hate the way
there’s so much that I just can’t figure out
There’s so much that I just cannot take
There are so many things that I hate
but they all rate below you
Yes
I hate you

I’m lamenting the very day
that I took my heart and gave it away
I want it back
I want the old me returned right away
I want me back
I want to finally wake up
and not think of this breakup 
and finally breathe easily at last
I feel another panic attack
Another moment of
having no hope at all
Another time I find myself
so freaked out
and then I fall
I’m falling down

I hate the way
I’m only happy on cloudy days
I hate the way
there’s so much that I just can’t figure out
There’s so much that I just cannot take
There are so many things that I hate
but they all rate below you
Yes
I hate you
I hate you
Yes
I hate you
I hate you
Yes
I hate you
I hate you
I hate you
I hate you
Yes
Yes I do
I hate you

How does that make you feel?
Well I hope it makes you feel
twice as bad as you make me feel
I feel bad
I am so unlovable
so untouchable
so forgettable 
so forsaken
I feel bad
And I hope you feel
twice as bad as you make me feel
because I hate you
Yes
I hate you
Yes I do
I hate you
because I’m dead in my heart


Details | Lyric | |

A Glimpse

Never will I have a flawless body
Or be a beauty queen
I am just who I am
What you get is what you've seen

I eat when I am bored
I get jealous as easily as hell
If you ask me to dispense my secrets
I might not be quick to tell

I am sensitive beyond measure
Even though, I keep plenty in
I conceal most of my anger
I'm not the devil but I do sin

Sometimes I get neglectful
I know how to make a mess
But if you ask me to be great
I'll give you nothing less

I hate to be alone
Nightmares get me when awake
Sometimes making it through the day alive
Is more than I can take

I am deeply serious
Yet, I do know how to have fun
I'll procrastinate like crazy
If important, I'll get it done

I believe in God and heaven
I've played with death multitude times
I hide behind numberless masks
Caught in a play without the lines

I love to think of you
A calm spirit in a chaotic universe
My life has changed within meeting you
My heart beats to a broken verse

I don't handle rejection
Even if it is real or in my head
I am beyond gullible then you can imagine
Many lies I have been feed

I have the worst mood swings
I change in the blink of an eye
One moment I am happy, the next sad
I hate it when I can't cry

My strongest fear is abandonment
Therefore, when people get close, I push them away
All I ask is for you to have patience
The light will come within the day

I will always give 100%
It is the best that I can do
In life as well as my heart
I am a woman who loves you


Details | I do not know? | |

Forbidden Love

So what if my mind goes blank from just a glance
And just a thought about her makes my depression lift
Maybe too cliché for me, if you catch my drift 
 Even when its my heart that lifts
I can't help that its her that I've fallen for
I refuse to stop even when she makes life a blur
I just can't stop how I commit this crime
It's fine to most but to others, it's unacceptable
No one ever thinks its something to which I'm susceptible 
Perfect religions hate to breed my kind
They hate the very existence of my frame of mind
It's not a crime; it's in my every thought
My every action defined by my will to play for either team
Can't you tell your hatred tears me apart at the seam?


Details | I do not know? | |

Someone You Once Knew

When I Look In The Mirror, I Hate Myself.

I See A Shell Waiting To Come Out,

Behind Every Girl Is A Story To Be Told.

Once I Knew But Now I Know,

Will The Story Of Me Ever Be Told?

You Will Never Know,

The Story Of Me Is Bestowed.

You Used To Know Me,

Now You Forgot Me.

I'm That Girl You One Knew.

Now Your Lost And Don't Have A Clue

Lost Yourself Within Yourself

You Still Have Yourself You Just Have To Find The Inner You!!<3


Details | Free verse | |

Pay No Mind - Just a Drunk

I drink to feel
but air fills my eyes 
and the projection
on my eye lids plays
a disappointing piece.
I hear voices 
but I can't hear words?
It's bathing me
but I'm as dry as a damned
grain of the driest center of the 
Mojave.
If anthrax was a thought
I'd be dead ten times over


Details | I do not know? | |

For the Freedom-Loving people of Syria

Massacre at Houla.

She was no more than 10 years of age.
He could have been a grandfather.

Young, old, women, girls, men, boys.

108 lives.

Now they are buried,
in hurriedly dug graves,
on the plains of Houla.

Killed by knives,
shot at point-blank range,
slaughtered, mowed-down.

108 lives.

Snuffed-out. Decimated. Taken-out.

108 lives.

As Damascus lies blatantly,
spewing forth untruth,
108 warm, dead bodies,
remain buried,
in hurriedly dug graves,
on the plains of Houla.

108 lives.


Details | Free verse | |

You and Landon

We laughed so hard we fell off the bed
And I hit my head
We laughed even more
But i'm not quite so sure
anymore 
Do you take me for a fool
You turned your back and left me in the cool
You never will really know for real
I dont want to steal
Steal your time away from her
That would cause to much of a stir
It just bugs me 
Thats all 
One minute you hate eachother
And back stabing eachother
The next your her best friend
I never have backstabed you like you've done to me
Im a bigger person
Being your friend has worsten
Its worstened my thought
Like you have bought
You have bought my thoughts from me
Im as truethful as I cant be
I dont care if your friends
Just know my friend this is the end
When you say you hate someone thats taken seriously
Really
I'm tired of being confused
And all the friends I loose
Just trying to keep up with ya'll 
Im going to get up from this fall
I dont know if I can get over what she did
So im going to shut my lid
This may go unread
Bit its not a waste of lead
Its how I truely feal
And its real
Not fake, Its real like getting branded 
This is how I feal about you and Landon


Details | I do not know? | |

ONCE UPON A TIME

I hate you enough to walk away and never turn back when time 
goes by without you along the fading way crystallize the one-path 
along my eyes and cheek as you go away..

I hate you enough to see the storm behind you already tear me up 
and make me believe that my heart is not always come along 
with my mind nor my one-body as you go away..

I hate you enough to wait a day after the day that I blessed for 
bringing you back right into my eyes through my one-dimension 
with the storm behind you following as you go away..


I..
We..
A lot..
Indeed..
And only..
That much..
Only that much..
Without you inside.. 
...........................
....................
...............
...........
........
.....
...


I hate you enough to understand one-moment that we had 
once upon a time..


Details | I do not know? | |

Voices


Ugly worthless Whore

Words and lies are spit at you. Ugly words of hate.

*****. LOOOOOOSER! Hideous.

Each one cutting you deeper and deeper. Making little wounds on your heart.

Don't you know no one likes you?

And you start to believe that. You look around and find no friends.

You'll always be alone.

The voices are screaming at you now. They've got you right where they wwant you. Digging their talons deep in and tearing at you...ripping you apart. They tell you hideous lies and you can't stop them.

Leave me alone!

You scream and there it is...silence. But only for a second...the voices come back...first low and taunting...getting louder and more vicious by the second. You start to go insane...tearing things down. Throwing things across the room. Screaming at the top of your lungs...anything to drown them out...but they won't stop.

You can't stop us...

They tease, laughing maniacally. But you relax...letting them overtake you...letting them have their fun..but you just stand there. Like a rock. You don't react. You just stand there and take it...the voices die down.

Isn't this bothering you?

The voice small and meek now...and then it's gone. You feel bliss...total complete...silence. It's there it's finally there! You wait a few more moments and still...NOTHING! You conquered the voices...they no longer control you. No longer dominate your life. They were never really in control at all, and now you realize that.

At last you can rest. At last you can be happy. At last you can LIVE! At last At last At last!

Well I am not sure what this form is...I would think prose maybe??? I kind of wanted it to read slightly like a story...please tell me what you think :)


Details | I do not know? | |

For Dr Martin Luther King Jr

For Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
 
You had a dream
of pastures of peace
where children of all hues mingled like rainbows
 
they silenced you, but your voice
resounds now in those pastures
not yet of peace
 
and your dream is still a dream
the dream you dreamt while others slept
 
you said that you’d been to the mountain-top
and they silenced your voice just then
before your eyes saw that promised land
of pastures of peace where children of all hues mingle like rainbows
 
now your vision is glimpsed in some pastures
not yet of peace
and yes, they silenced your voice
but your spirit their bullets could never tear apart
your spirit, like your dream
is mingled with the wind in all those pastures
not yet of peace
and until we give life to your dream
those pasture of peace
where children of all hues mingle like rainbows
shall remain simply your dream
so as we remember you today
and pledge that those pastures of peace
are nourished first in each of us
for only then will your dream will take root
and blossom into our shared dream
and the view from the mountain-top,
radiant and bright and full of hope shall seem
 
where children of all hues mingle like rainbows
 
 
 
 


Details | I do not know? | |

Seasonal Change (Angel of Sadness)

As my soul dwells in your past 
I kill for this moment to pass 
Al though I smile 
I find myself more and more suppressed 
As if, your casket was buried in my chest 

Yes, I breathe 
For I believe 
I am promised to leave 

And I hate the winter 
All the days of September 
I hate the center of a broad frost December 

And as the night expires 
My fright assumes your desires 
I feel I am not the child I used to be 
The privilege of this substance abuses me 
I hate to be the selfish man I have become 
But as if it were fate 
Sadness reigns past noon for some 

I hate the winter 
All the days of September 
I hate the center of a broad frost December


Details | Free verse | |

the maze of fate

Doing what it wants to do 
Ruining lives, accusing people, taking trust
Giving you a sin that’s not yours 
Letting you’re happiness fade
In the most not suited times, in the most simplest ways!!!
I hate it!!! I hate it!!! In many ways!!!
But you have no power over it, you just have to believe
Believe the words, trust it, but it will let you down 
It will sure do, it is written cannot be changed
You’re actions and prayers can change some of it 
But you shall not question, you shall not ask why 
Just pray to God to help you through, be good, act good
Do good, and then wait for the results…




Details | I do not know? | |

Insanity

Haunted by my memories 
Reminded of those I hate 

Destined to be alone 
Left with feeling I create 

Surrounded by my many thoughts 
Waiting for something new 

With all this hate I have inside 
Whats a girl to do? 

I wrestle with my sanity 
I struggle to keep my cool 

In this game of life and death I'd say... 
I'm to play the fool 

Flirting with the idea of madness 
What have I become? 

Instead of feeling it a shame 
I could have some fun 

But if your gonna stick around 
I'll give u some advice 

I'm crazier than I look sometimes 
So dont ever close your eyes.


Details | Rhyme | |

POOR

writting my life to paper
I am struggling now, but how about my later
You say I owe you the world, Well how about my maker?
My face is pale, yours is crowed with make-up
Every day a new goliath, I fail to wake up
I miss yesterday, your disires make me pay
I hate to say, Lord take me away!
depts are calling, and death is following
tired of borrowing, tired of doing the laundry
Friends can't hold me
disgusted but not once have they told me
torn jeans, 
walking like a meance feeling like I am in the wrong skin
Smeeling like last nights raw beans and sardines
Broke I regret the hour I woke
"Lies" is the name given to all the promises I ever spoke
I prevoke the fortunate, 
choke in the faces of those living opulant
If I am to die all I will ever be useful for is manure
why was'nt I born pour,
Raised poor, Lady fate I hate her
hungry, broken and neglected I write my life


Details | Free verse | |

Divided

Divided into the pieces of pieces of pieces,
That form my fully conscious conscience
I hate that love to love
Have the ability to love to hate
But will always hate to hate
I wish I could be the over praised,
over exaggerated,
over rated normality that is blessed to so many
But me
I want to be inside the box
because the weather out here,
sucks as much as my skewed and looped perception of
Where I thought I was going....


Details | Lyric | |

The Truth

I have been hiding my secrets
My lies
The reason
Why I like to compromise
This is my life
You have to understand
I am so weird
I am crazy
You will hate me
For sure
You looked freak out
When I told you
About everything
And everything
About who I am
Please understand

I had struggled 
Hiding the truth inside
I can't lie
I don't want to hide
Anymore
I want to open that door
So that
I could see more

And I told you today
Your eyes were huge
I felt so weird
After telling you

Strange how my truth
Can be
It is not easy
To let it out
This is my darkest
And most biggest secret
I had told you
You got over it
Thought you would hate me

The truth is out
I could not forget this
Because 
Each time I see you
Reminds me of that day
The day I told you
Everything
The truth


Details | I do not know? | |

Fire And Ice

The amount of fire I hold 
Astonishingly is more than the sun 
But very unfortunately it does not reflect 
Light nor does it generate energy
No smoke it emits, silently 
Burns me down without flame 
Instead of molten lava of ash 
The hate of incapability which I have 
Frozen it into a big piece of stone-hard ice. 


Details | I do not know? | |

Hate

The last thing i ever wanted was for you to die.
I wish that you were here with me.
Id tell you how much i love you sweetie.
You are just my Angel, i love you so,
I never wanted you to go.
I miss you with everything i ever had
Now when my life ends
Ill just pretend
I Hate You
My life without you
Has been a living Hell
My mother
My friends even can tell
I break apart
I hate my life
I hate my heart...


Details | Lyric | |

The Day Before

This world grows dim
this world grows dim
this world's glowing dimmer than before;
Before this hate amongst ourselves
seared us to our core.
This world was glowing oh so bright
on the day before;
On the day before--on the day before
the day before this sorrowful war.
The sunshine's fading more
than the moon that came before
that sorrowful war.
Ignore the hate amongst ourselves
that chilled us to the core
and enjoy the way it was on
the day before.


Details | Haiku | |

Haiku 1- There is still a question

Stop wait you are great
But do you participate
In love or hates fate

T.B.T


Details | Free verse | |

another life gone

this is for someone who ever lost someone
another life gone 
taking by hate crime
taking by being in the wrong place at the wrong time
taking by someone who cant take life no more
taking by a mother who dont want her kids
taking by a drunk as a father 
taking by someone who dont care bout life 
another life gone 
for some crazy  reason
there no more talking 
there no more looking for help 
just blood all over the place 
and another family is as helpless as they can be
because noone want to help
the big man is laughing because there is another black man or girl gone
why hate us so much 
its getting to that point where you going to walk over body 
because there will be no more place to put them
another person 6 feet under the ground
another family looking for help
why what is wrong with this world today
do any one have a care in their heart


Details | Free verse | |

my life

what am i living for ?
for eating, sleeping and working...
what is so special in my life ? 
whenever i sit alone ,i keep on crying 
for something that i want very much,
for something that i cant find...
and this thing made me hate everything around me , 
even the nearest person to me. 
i hate myself for not changing my life, 
for not being happy , 
for not being genuine with my self, 
for not being extrovert  
for obliging myself to be detached from the world and from the people around me.
but i the love the Sara in me , the Sara that's sleeping deeply in my soul waiting  
for me to wake up her...     
but my question is :is she going to help me??? 
some people born to be happy and to have a nice, easy life 
but some people born to have a tough and a hard life...
why do i have to be from the second kind ???
i keep telling myself : im the happiest person on earth, which is not .
i try to fill my time in anything to stop the feeling of orgasm , 
because it hurts my soul a lot , and it's hard to be healed again ...


Details | I do not know? | |

Consilience

 Snow-drifts
as time
along a fifty mile strip
of cracking tar rubbed raw by the constancy
of speeding cars roaring past this crumbling city,
indifferent to the frost matted fields
or the give and take of December lovers
walking hand in hand up High Street.

Work shifts
along
as long as they've ever been
and we talk less now,
now that she's busier
our weekdays waste by
and I'm awake, always
trying to sleep all the time.
My life is wound tight in a stress-cord
I don't want to unwind,
I live once, burn strong,
and then I die;
Don't lesson the experience.

So indulge.

Swift dips
in her form cut
along, like a razor
my lust has lost control, revel in the nature
of the smooth slips of skin between plaid fabric
tracing her hips and tasting her depravity
it begs as much as beckons to give to the insanity
to indulge in the heat, the passion, the intimacy
of her pressed close to a heaving chest, proud
with the lunacy, of effort and reward,
the consillience of the moment
hinged on the edge of each other

those things will come less and less
in life and that's a fleeting truth
to dwell on,
so everyone always chooses
the lesser path
the one that leads to nothing
time is longer lived together,
time is longer spent always loving every moment
in between the things that wear us thin.

Loneliness is the cold fire
that ignites at the core of my everything
it moves my world, my feet, and my focus
from you to the wrath of the locusts that
plague my every waking moment in this place
I hate that I'm so far away
from everything that matters.
I hate that I'm so far away
from where I want to be.


Details | Free verse | |

fetus

every feeling, every thought
cursing through these veins
cut off by the blood clot
i don't miss these growing pains
you taught me to love
you taught me to hate
when push came to shove
i could always relate
every feeling every thought
i was your fetus
i was your blood clot
and now look at us
full of self pity, self doubt
i hate you, I HATE YOU
for everything i'm about
what is it? i didn't do?
the feeling the thought
one year away
from doing everything i wasn't taught
what is it? i didn't say? a part of me is always you, it's always 'us'
its's every feeling, it's every thought
find another fetus
find another blood clot


Details | Free verse | |

I Hate preview

I  HATE

I hate to say I understand some ones pain knowing I really have no clue.
And I hate trying to give them advice when I know I wouldn't know what to do.
I hate saying its going to be okay when I myself is doubting it in my mind.
And I hate asking millions of questions when I know the answers are hard to find.
I hate to pry into someones personal space even thou I know a hug is needed.
And I hate to fuel the fire of emotions by accident because I don't want to feed it.
I rather not be the one held responsible when someone's world comes tumbling down
And I hate to be the person that catches the after shock but I'll always be around.
I hate to say it doesn't matter when I know deep down inside it really does.
And I hate make people dwell in the past because this is the way it is and that's the way it 
was.
I hate to see people sob even thou it doesn't move me enough to make me want to cry.
And I hate to see people who hate life so much that it would make them want to die.

I hate to see that ignorance is still being birth in a country who lives off of being diverse.
And I hate to think that we came along way in these hundreds of years just to disperse.
I hate that it takes drastic measures to bring people together as one.
And I hate that people no longer have the attitude of what's done is done.
I hate that people now have to take things to the next level when it could easily be dropped.
And I hate that if your walking down the street innocently your life could now be stopped.
I hate that kindness is now taken for weakness so people are taking advantage of others.
And I hate when fathers don't take care of their responsibility and the same goes for 
mothers.


Details | ABC | |

Sad and Alone

  
Sad and alone,
I see you cry.
"Look at me,
please dont tell me a lie!"

You try to speak,
But no words come out.
I see the tear,
and start to shout.

"You were with her 
and not with me"
You try to speak,
But I cry "LET ME BE!"

Walking off,
I break slowly down.
I hear your voice,
and start to frown.

"Leave me alone,
and dont come back,
Maybe now that your gone,
my life will be on track"

Five weeks gone,
and Im still bleeding.
Its your love you gave me,
that I am needing.

My heart breaks,
cause your not here.
Your probely with her,
That's something I fear.

I know your happy,
But Im dying inside.
I wish you were here,
So we could go for that ride.

I cant live like this,
I hate being apart.
But I hate you so,
But you'll always be in my heart.

I'll be alone,
& Im sure you wont be doing the same,
You'll be out with her,
which I find extremly lame.

Looking out the window,
I see her with another lad.
I smile and call you up,
It's now time for you to be sad.

You cry your heart out,
Telling me what to do now.
I tell you I still love you,
and we start a new row.

You can run after her if you want to,
and ask her to stay.
She'll say she loves you,
But she will betray.

We could never really be together,
Cause you love her so.
So I just rip your picture up,
and scream "Just GO"

Never will I love again,
cause you tore me apart.
So dont come back,
otherwise I'll break your heart.
 


Details | Rhyme | |

DRAMA

teardrops left for the weary and broken,
chances on a dream unfulfilled.
inappropriate comments on your unique habits,
unwanted claims on the promise of negativity.
untold unwanted pressures,
times wanting you to brood over regrets and lessons.
old aged feeling that you are getting left behind,
mental insanity on and off my mind.
troubles with people that you are close to;
pains that behold you,
problems with no easier solutions.
emotionless backsliding,
with no limit on the unknown regrets.
leaves you clueless to your's and everyone else's hurts.


Details | Free verse | |

Encrypted Mind of Skippy 3

Its the tongue and cheek when the compulsive liars always speak,

Act bleak as they continue to sneak-a-peak,

Of what leaks the poison they continue to drink,

Wander aimlessly in the dark... clockwork makes you distraught,

So I start the spark as it increases the beasts bark,

Outlined in chalk as the casualties reappear on the chart,

Future looks grim when you continue to sin,

Happiness within is smothered from the pain you feel unforgiven,

Love transforms to hate... hate dissipates the emotions you migrate,

Souls irate... suffocating itself until you lose it's mind state,

Dissect what remains, emotions scattered in the brain leave you,

Marked insane as you pray that someone will stop the wicked rain,

Try to rearrange the colors you plaster on the paper once plain,

Tick-tock on the repeated clock has all activities come to a sudden stop,

Drop the top as you reveal what makes you pollute your precious crop,

Dissect this brain... speak my name... feel the pain coursing through these veins,

I confided and love I provided to be rejected when you said I'll always be accepted,

I leave it where you left it but you can't respect it so I ****ing severe it,

Endless planet seems flawless until the drugs enahances it,

Evil glances provide with the answers to defeat the infectious cancer,

Label me a bastard because I won't provide your ignorance with laughter,

Ever care so much you lose yourself? Ever hated something so bad you hate yourself?

Day in and day out I'm in a battle with myself yet all your worried about is yourself?

Where's the bodies wealth when you work your soul to death,

The curse makes me beserk as I continue to kill the retards,

Lost pace increases the space... the space leaves you dirt to face,

The worth of faith diminishing along with the morals of mans good grace,

Graze on my lawn... silently remove my last pawn,

Stitch your faded cloth as your reality filters your thoughts,

Hear the gossip... don't stop it, accept any love when it's offered,

That's why I'm bothered... people care but dare to not play fair,

Satisfying their chest rather then the one who leave it bare,

The circus will surface as you evil mother ****ers hide behind the curtains,

Chairs with dead carcasses will reveal your actions caused your hollow coffin,

Eyes tell the story... from the mistakes and from things you did all holy,

The glory of defeating your titans is satisfaction enough to keep fighting.


Details | I do not know? | |

how could u

how could u leave me with just my innocence
how could i was just a baby
how could u forget all about me 
how could u not take me with u
how could u just sit there and help not help me
how could u throw him away i hate u for that
how could u say he dont love me 
how could u let me not have nothing to do with him
how could u leave me with only little memories of u 
i cant stand it i hate u both of u for everything if u would have takein me i could of
avoided all of the crap that has become of my stupid painful life


Details | Free verse | |

Lay OFF of Me

You are under his roof now...
Deny it not
You are his own comforter
Lay off of me, you stubborn child -
LEAVE ME!!
You feel perfect
When he's near...
When I appear...
You draw back in fear...
You are his property now
It's SO true - 
You are a selfish, little liar 
You burn me like flames 
You called me nasty names
Your image transformed to shame 
You witch!
I was caught under your spell...
You dwell...
IN DARKNESS...
Down you go in the abyss
You are so insidious....
Frankly, you've done enough damage
While I tried my hardest to break free
From the bondage 

You dwell in the shadows 
With the predator...
Lay off of me,

YOU total disaster

Obey your master - 
the devil...




Details | Free verse | |

defining innocence

one life for you to watch
with the perfect plan
everything mankind is
on center stage
to decide our own levels of innocence
welcome to judgement day
please please condmen me for my mistakes youve made
I'll be your reflection
with all my preplanned perfect protests i call mistakes

your feeling tortured?
to see how you all add up to just one
everything you are and have become
i take on and display rub in your face
lead you to temptation to throw me away

watch me steal
and lie and cheat
watch me fight and hate and freak
watch me manipulate love and cry
watch this life of the perfected reflection of our innocence
but keep it alive

see the perversity we have become
notice my flaws and deny you have them
i am your innocence on trila today
a victom of how the world around me is a reflection and they all add up this way
so welcome to judgement day where you watch misunderstand
and seal your own fate

The life of a con
the cheater
the liar
the heartbreaker
the believer
the nonconformist
the follower and leader
the life on center stage for you to pick apart to learn from
milk it while you can
your opinions of me is nothing more than all about you
and as you judge me you have judged innocence
your innocence and condemned mankind
for a selfless person that has gone out of his way

to be the terrorist
the hate the lover
th epeacekeeper
the husband
the loner
the brother

here i am all of you my reflection creating what i am today
learn to steer the wheel of the robot i am
and make me truly innocent once again


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

Devastation

You would understand, 
if you could see through my eyes,
why I have the fact 
of hate and despise.

Through the days of time,
praying to God instead of shrines.
Deep, dark secrets going through my mind
so dreadful, I wish I could leave them behind.

From time to time
wishing I was never here;
Watching my back 
from all these double-crossing peers.

Always smiling 
in someone's face,
while underneath
I look with disgrace.

All this pressure placed upon me
like the great walls of the sea;
Please, Lord, lift my soul
so I can be with thee.

And if I could save myself from this hurtful state,
I would fly away to a much safer place.
A place like the heavenly gates,
where all God's love would erase my hate.

And please, Lord, don't let it be too late--
because all I want is to be 
without hate in my heart--
for goodness sake.


Details | Free verse | |

Deepest Reaches of Hell

In the blackest night a foul breeze blows across me
as the demons lust and desire they ravage me.
Their claws tearing my flesh, he has sent them to collect me.

My screams echo through the deepest reaches of hell,
Satan smiles when he hears the sounds of my pain and suffering
as they drag me down to him. His joy filling my soul with hate
and contempt for him, he feels alive.

Like a cut rose I fight for life only to dry up, 
to be tossed out as if I were nothing,
not even a thought or a memory will remain.

Lost in the throws of abandon at his will,
living only for his pleasure, his every whim.
I hate him; I hate myself for being lost to him.

My heart chained and locked to his, happiness eludes me.
I find myself waiting for the peace of death to find me.
In a constant battle I fight for my sanity, I live my fears.

I defy him in all places of my heart, 
with victory over my soul, he laughs at me.
My eyes see the blood dripping from his teeth;
his breath putrid with the smell of decaying flesh and bone
of the ones who came before.

As his darkness unfolds over my mind I am lost,
lost to myself, lost to love, lost to life.
Even in my dreams he degrades me,
forced to watch as he crushes them before my eyes.

I find myself covered in the blanket of his wickedness,
chained by his evil heart; his demons hold me to him, 
there is no escape.

In the blackest night, when the foul breeze blows against me
I will know they are coming.
He has sent them to collect me once again.

His lust and desire will consume me,
my screams will echo and he will smile as they bring me to him.
Once again my suffering will make him feel alive.

This devil, 

this Satan

 will keep me forever imprisoned in the 
deepest reaches of hell.


Details | ABC | |

Self

 Beware..........
is what my heart tells me,
run for your life,
you have to flee,
from all the chaos,
in your thoughts,
and the pain and burdens,
before it rots,
the only part,
thats left so true,
and before the insanity,
overtakes you !!!!!!


Details | Verse | |

Last Night

Last Night, When I slept,
I heard a Voice.
Oh foolish man, why do you hate my colour?
Black is my choice, ’I delivered it,
Because I like it.
Can you change your colour?
If you can’t change your colour,
Then why do you hate my choice?

Last Night, When I slept,
I heard a Voice,
Oh Foolish man, ‘why do you hate that human?
He isn’t downtrodden,
I am his creator.
You don’t hate him but you also insulted me,
He is only human, ‘that can serve for me’. 
Dogs and cats can’t serve my creation.

Last Night, When I slept,
I heard a Voice,
Oh Foolish man, why do you hate him?
I am a creator, who gave him a voice?
If you don’t understand him, why do you hate him?
That’s only me, who produces seeds,
Oh man, if you can’t secure my creation, 
Why do you ruin them?

You never paid any cost to me,
I gave you earth, water, air, rain, clouds, sky,
Mountains, river, trees, birds, animals etc,
What do you give to me?
Only pain, tear, innocent killing,
I gave you natural resources, free of cost,
So you can enjoy your life.
You are so wise you only degraded me.

When you insulted me, I flooded rain,
When you hated my choice, I hurricane pain, 
You don’t know how to live on earth, ’disasters are your gain’,
I gave you all free to enjoy a life,
But you served killing, rape, corruption, robbery,
And believing, after death, you shall live in heaven,
But you don’t learn justice,
Why do you imagine, ’you are able to live in heaven?
You are only my criminal, 
Never think I shall spare you. 


Details | Narrative | |

A World of Shame and Neglect

 
The little child was born into a home of violence and abuse.
      Sadness was the closest thing to love and that was no excuse.
A little child screaming as his mother gets slapped and tossed all around,
     While his worthless father struts thinking he is something he is quite profound.
The little children with ragged clothes and snotty noses just stood there in tears,
      What an impression this father has made for them through the years.
We live in a monkey see monkey do get messed up society,
     Most of the children grew up watching their parents fighting never knowing 
sobriety.
 Alcohol or drugs, seemed to dominate most of the poor.
     The thing they didn’t realize this was only a temporary escape door.
The pain that was eased only led to more grief.
      Till violence took over in the name of relief.
 The daddy was loaded up paying the bills, food, utilities and rent,
      While momma stayed home pregnant and got fussed at for the money she 
spent.
They had sunk so low they were ashamed to attend any church,
      Afraid that the pastor might point them out as he stood on his perch.
What is the answer if any to this little tale of mine,
       How can we make it stop, can we ever draw a line.
 I do know that hate begets hate so could love be the key?
       Has anyone ever tried it long enough to truly find the answer of this I  would 
love to see.
All of my life I have heard do unto others as you would have them do unto you,
        Such a simple answer could this be all we need to do?
Think About It!!!


Details | Ballad | |

Nothing To Find

Torn apart the dreams turn to tears, Going back to anger are the only fears. Trying to find a safe place to hide, The only thing is hate and guilt to the side. Nowhere to ease the mind, Nothing to find. 

True values of pain, Like a cowardly leader in battle to be slain. Rise to fall, There's no feeling to feel at all. Torn apart the dreams turn to tears, Going back to anger are the only fears. Trying to find a safe place to hide, The only thing is hate and guilt to the side. Nowhere to ease the mind, Nothing to find.


Details | I do not know? | |

COULD YOU

COULD YOU ONEDAY STOP LOVING ME?
LEAVE ME HATE ME AND LET ME BE?
COULD YOU EVER CALL ME OUT OF NAME?
SAY IT'S MY FAULT EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT TO BLAME?
COULD YOU TURN YOUR HEAD AND FORGET ABOUT ME?
ACT LIKE I NEVER EXSISTED JUST BECAUSE WE DISAGREED?
COULD YOU WALK AWAY AND NEVER LOOK BACK?
OR YELL OBSCENITIES JUST FOR ATTACK?
COULD YOU EVER WISH THAT I WAS DEAD?
AND TELL ME THAT I WAS TRUELY MISLEAD?
TELL ME THAT I NEVER MEANT A THING?
AND ALL ALONG I WAS NOTHING BUT A FLING?	
COULD YOU LOOK ME IN THE EYE?
AND TELL ME THAT IT WAS ALL A LIE?
COULD YOU SLAP ME IN THE FACE?
AND TELL ME YOU NEED YOUR SPACE?
COULD YOU WOULD YOU DISAPPEAR WITHOUT A TRACE?
AND NEVER AGAIN HOLD ME IN YOUR WARM EMBRACE?
COULD YOU ONEDAY STOP LOVING ME?
LEAVE ME HATE ME AND LET ME BE?


Details | Rhyme | |

I Don't Like

I don’t like this.
I don’t deserve it either.
Everyone else has someone good.
I have a disease from the hood.
I don’t want it anymore.
I hate to see it walking through my door,
Pain, strife, not treating me right.
Wanting badly to be someone’s wife.
It seems that I hate being me, 
Because I always get mistreated.
I don’t like this,
But I won’t declare to be defeated.


wrote 9-13-09


Details | I do not know? | |

Be True To Yourself

Don’t let pity embrace you.
Learn to embrace pity with compassion.

Don’t let fear contain you.
Learn to contain fear with courage.

Don’t let hate change you. 
Learn to change hate through love.

Don’t let loneliness fill you.
Learn to fill loneliness with tranquility.

Don’t let any of it affect you.
Learn to affect anyone who needs you.

Don’t let yourself be someone else.
Learn to let you and others be themselves.


Details | Tanka | |

Curse of Hate

The witches held men Up against the wall of pain Where they are shackled To take the brunt of the curse Leaving them helpless to hate They will infect more Of their own people in town Creating hate throughout The townsfolk fear their return How they will spread hate around Death sure soon follows To kill the many lost ones The curse will live on Through the few that were taken Where Halloween brought a curse
Russell Sivey


Details | I do not know? | |

JUST ANOTHER POEM

 JUST ANOTHER POEM


SOMETIMES I REALLY FEEL ALONE
AS IF A ROSE THAT ONE HAS OUT GROWN
NO ONE TO TALK TO NO ONE WHO CARES
KNOWING THAT MY PROBLEMS ARE MINE TO BARE
I SHOULDN'T REALLY CARE THAT THERE'S NO ONE THERE
BUT SOMETIMES IT HURTS CAUSE I REALLY NEED TO SHARE
TO SHARE WHAT'S ON MY MIND OR IN MY HEAD
TO SHARE FEELINGS THAT I THINK MIGHT BE DEAD
IN MY SKY THERE ARE NO STARS
ONLY FADED FACES AND DEEP WOUNDED SCARS
SOMETIMES I GO AND SIT IN THE PARK
BUT NEVER IN THE DAYTIME ONLY THE DARK
DARKNESS IS MY LIFE MY WAY OF BEING
MY WAY OF LIVING MY WAY OF SEEING
I THINK IT MIGHT BE BETTER TO BE BLIND
THEN ONLY SWEET VISIONS CAN DANCE IN MY MIND
VISIONS OF HAPPINESS AND MEMORIES OF LOVE
MEMORIES OF ANGELS THAT HAVE BEEN SENT FROM ABOVE
BUT THINGS SUCH AS THIS ARE ONLY A DREAM
AND MY TEARS CONTINUE TO FALL FROM MY EYES IN A STREAM
I LOOK AT MY LIFE AND REALIZE THAT I HATE IT
AND SOMETIMES IT WOULD BE EASIER JUST TO QUIT
I HATE WHERE I LIVE AND EVERYONE AROUND ME
MY NIEGHBORS NO NOT HOW TO LET ME BE
I HATE MY DR'S WHO KNOW NO CURE
WHO THINK THAT IN THIER MINDS EVERYTHING IS PURE
I KNOW THAT I'LL ALWAYS BE JUST "WELL CONTAINED"
AND WITH THE RIGHT TREATMENT I MIGHT BE TRAINED
TRAINED NOT TO SCREAM OR HOLLER OR SHOUT
I THINK A BULLET TO THE BRAIN MIGHT BE MY WAY OUT
OUT OF THIS MISERY AND PAINED STAKED LIFE
OUT OF THIS THING THAT CUTS LIKE A KNIFE.
AWAY FROM THESE EVERYDAY TEARS
AWAY FROM THE THINGS THAT CAUSE ME FEAR
LIKE LOVE AND HAPPINESS AND SHARING A TIME
AND EVEN TRYING MY HARDEST TO MAKE THESE THINGS RHYME
AND IF I SHOULD DIE BEFORE I AWAKE
I PRAY NOT FOR HIM MY SOUL TO TAKE
LET ME WANDER THROUGH AND THROUGH
LET ME BE MYSELF LET ME BECOME ANEW..........


Details | Free verse | |

In the Blink Of An Eye

In the blink of an eye
In the time it takes to
Take one breath and
Then another-we go
From love to hate and
Back again.

Our love is like a roller costar
Soaring ever upwards to the sky
And then plunging back to earth
In a flash of hate and regret
Leaving us both dazed and confused.

Such is the never ending fine
Line between love and hate.



Details | Bio | |

Commander

I feel invisible. And Christmas feels like another terror crisis for families. I design 
every city, feel no pity for this except, and  can't travel and have romantic sex in the 
cities with my princess Jaclyn. I will make the Da Vinci Code book come to life as 
I read out loud at any (crowded place.) I will prove why the United States of 
America is invincible, how I make all people and products possible. Can display 
any where, we are in my supervision, which is a controlled environment.  I am a 
super power who created the best super power country, I have and continue to 
bless North America. We are one world divided by religion.  So we are still 
divisible. Anybody who knows the english language should be able to tell nobody 
chipped in to create the language and titles of companies. The rhymes, the 
articulate ways to play with sound. Only one person could do this for the reason 
of trying to reach you.  All I can do is play with tv and family. Only if I had allies 
there would be no defects. I hate marketing our life spans. You can believe or if 
not, you just sided with the devil when youdon't believe, and I hate to make 
people decide on their lives. Example is suicide.I hate to be evil. Need money to 
get out of my house.   Its lame to see people blame. This is not a game, I want 
change. I am royalty with not enough loyaltists. If this persists, people will keep 
on perishing. Allah is allowed to have a career in reality, since I am the most 
creative.. All I know is I is he, he is I. I even 
created the aloe plant. We can start to heal families, and I prove I gave all "Family 
Ties". I build on what I build. The world is mine. One day it will be ours. If read 
this I wouldn't  wait till my ressurection of making the future making cycle , 
beacsue I don't feel comfortable. I hate to create insurgents, I created the internet 
to reach the world.  I designed the internet. You bet its a playhouse,like Wynmoor 
on Cococnut Ceek Blvd. I get illusions from the word conk=cock or (count.) I get a 
scroll or dimensional pop up before me of the pearl of a girl.  Love handles really 
means for drawers on furniture. Don't pull love handles but put you weight on it, 
like railings at banks and Disney World. I made the design of slang for the 
reason to rap it up. People are using the wrong words which makes our lives 
miserable. I would like to progress, but still no progress of reply. All I need is one 
mic, and money to come out and play. My souls' sold on dvd's and cd's around 
the globe! Its a goddy god world."


Details | I do not know? | |

to this

to this life i live 
to this death i die
all of life has made
me cry i do not know
why to the one i love 
to the one i hate you 
are the ones that made
life this great to my mom
and to my dad im sorry
for the life i had to choose
to my life and to my death
why is this all i get to my 
friend and to my foe i just
want to say i hate you both
to everything that i like i no
longer need you in my life
for my heart has been ripped
out of my chest and now death is
all i have left


Details | Free verse | |

Dream of Reality

Dreaming is like traveling to another world
We dont know where we are going
But we can't wait to get there 
It's a place where we can be free 
But we can also be a prisoner. 

It's a place where we have no fear
But where we find new ones 
It's a place where we can slay our dragons
But still come out with burns 
It's a place where we see ourselver as we do and dont want to be. 

It's a place where the good witch helps us home
But the wicked witch will knock us off the yellow brick road
It's a place full of magic 
It's a place where wonders happen 
But also where tragedy strikes. 

It's a place full of love 
But also of hate 
It's a place where the sun always shines 
And where the rain never stops 
Sound familiar? 

Our dreams are like reality 
There is love and hate 
There is good and evil 
There is rain and shine 
But reality is just part of life. 

We can make our reality whatever we want 
We can slay our dragons and we may come out with burns 
But our good witch will always help us home 
Tragedy will happen but wonders will never cease 
And we can be whoever we want. 

We can make our reality a dream 
And we can make our dreams a reality 
So open you eyes and dont be afraid to dream 
Because if you try hard enough 
You can make your life the dream you want it to be.


Details | Free verse | |

Wounded heart

Hate, hate is a strong word and so is love Love comes and goes but true love leaves within I am scared to hate but can't help the way I feel Because hate is something that comes to mind when I think of you You made me believe that someday you'll find me, find us. Someday your family whose my family would except me for who I am As a kid I always dreamed of that day when I'd run into your arms and feel your tender brace but now I am becoming an adult but still thinks like a kid when it comes to you I don't hate you, at least I think I don't, all I hate is the pain, the wishes, the hopes, that faith I have in you Mama never seems to get me at times She doesn't even seem to hear how I long for the unity between two families I am supposed to love to death Oh how much pain life has brought to me To you I am just a mistake one you wish to erase forever but to me, you are the reason I am here they say not to think about it, but what do they expect, at 15 all i want is the perfect home the perfect childhood the perfect life but nothing is close to perfect without you here oh how heartless the soul of a man you stole everything that could possibly make that whole that i so much need I AM A CHILD I see things around to make me wonder how life would have been if only you took a moment to love me the way you should instead you cast me away and made me feel unwanted, uncared for and like a mistake but you know what I am 15 and someday I'd grow out of it someday you would find me find me and cry oh tears of pain and agony would you sheared when you find me TEARS THAT BONDS A DAUGHTER WITH HER FATHER you will find me much stronger much more sucessful than you would ever think oh what a sucess i wouild be to prove you wrong and to show you that i got all the love i EVER NEED and maybe someday the baby in me would let you in till then i am just going to make the best i could out of a situation like this


Details | I do not know? | |

You Hate Me Don't You

Every day around you
You don't seem to care
Saying we will still be friends
There is hatred in the air
I hate it when you taunt
You play me like a fool
I am getting used to it
I feel like everyone's tool
Teasing my feelings
Messing with my mind
It's obvious that you hate me
Just leave me here to die...


Details | Free verse | |

Utopia

I speak of a made up world.
One that will never exist not today, not tomorrow. 

This world contains all gain and no pain.
A world that doesn’t include poisons only sugar and love. 
It is not made up of hate like this world of today.

A world in which secrets would not exist.
An earth in which children would be safe.

“Pain go away” would never be said in this world. 
Instead, people would say, “Love never ends.”

Dark clouds of depression would be chased away by the sunrays of friendship.
A lion would never roar only purr.

Genies would hand out not three wishes but a million wishes. 

Every girl would be crowned a princess and every woman would be a queen. 
Every boy would be a prince. Every man would be a king

Lemons would be sweet and not sour.

Let’s make this world true.
Let’s spin the web of magic.
Defy the laws of “Never” and make this world true Today!

Don’t you desire this?
This enchanted world of love, of peace, of understanding.

Are you not tired of today’s world?
A world in which only hate and pain exist.
Where hot salty tears have become the bread of many.
   
Make it true…this Utopia.
If not for yourself then for the future.
Leave the legacy that won’t perish.

Join me as I dream of what could be then…
Let’s do more than dream.
Plan for the new world.
A world of peace and complete love.  


 






Details | Prose Poetry | |

I Hope There is a Heaven the Invisible Man

Across the fields of golden corn there are no subtle waves just wretched waves,
I stand and look and it takes me back to bitterness no clean bright golden days,
I remember standing here with you but you have gone no more smiling at my side,
This was many, many years ago your smile was my sword but you left me you died,
Often I stand in our place with vengeance and anger seeing what we once both saw,
My eyes well up with warm tears I need revenge to calm my hate as never before,
And through my tears I see you my throat burns looking across our favorite place,
So young so pretty full of life my heart stopped, there is so much I cannot face
Living always with sadness trudging through a ruined life it’s been so very long,
You visit my dreams every night then again you leave in the morning you are gone,
And so starts another day of sadness all alone and a heavy aching, bleeding heart,
The words I need do not exist they never will all is pain as it hurts to be apart,
So I get on with my life through its blackness, play the part of a very average man,
Deep inside hidden under hate and bitterness we will be one again, I hope we can.


Details | Free verse | |

Take A Piece From My Heart

Take A Piece From My Heart

 

Take a piece and keep it close to you, take me wherever 
you go and you'll never lose who I am inside of you.
Make it seen to those who need warmth were it been lose. 
Don’t hate for hate burn your spirit take a bow.
You show pride and your self and it give me great pride to be next to you 
to see you stride for what you wanted and be great. So I say keep that 
piece you took from my heart and hold it close to you and know no matter
How far were apart you keep my piece and I’ll keep yours so that way well
be able to say that were in each other.Life no matter how far were apart 
were still close to each other heart.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

Loneiness in my life

Before my mom left.I told myself.
I would never love again.I will
only love myself and fight for myself.
I felt like I didn't exist.
People was scared of me..They called
me a freak.
Tears down my eyes everyday.
My head down.Anger in my life was
shadowing over me.
It felt like anger was taking over me.
Loneiness got the best of me.
Nobody didn't understand me..I sit
in the corner and be quiet.
watching all the kids play..nobody didn't
want too play..
I say too god everynight,why did you bring
me here..
I hate this ludacriss world..why did you
bring me here.
All they do is care for themselves..not
me.Images as a kid crying,I ask myself
what am I.Am I a monster.
What is pain and what is it like...
what does it mean too have tears in your
eyes.
I don't understand,I acidently prick my finger.
a dot of blood comes out.
I look at my finger.blood,humm.
I smile,pain,pain sucks?
I said too god I want too leave this hateful
world.
I walk the path of a strae..Why should I listen
too people.I feel like they just plain hate me.
my heart was broken.
Its no easy for kids with seziures too live in this
world.
It feels like your losing everything.
I thought in my mind my mom was a shame of me
and hated me.
thats why she left,I was so mad when I grew up,
I said I'm going too get respect from all of you..
And people who destroyed my dreams,
I see mirrors everday..I see diffrent of me in the 
mirrors.
all of them of me sad and when I was little crying..
I say,is this me..my eyes turn into tears..
Pain,why am I in soo much pain..I break the mirrors
and tears come down off my face.
I remember the words in my mind,I would never love 
again.I would only love myself and fight for myself.
I smile to myself....
loneiness,is just words too me...should I walk away from
my loneiness?
Day to day..A piece of my soul disappears away from me.
I know I can't walk away from my loneiness..
Its so hard too walk away form it.Its apart of me.
I'm going crazy...why did you have too do this to me mom..
I wish you didn't do this too me.
Its nice for me too smile,but I can't...
But my words couldn't see its way through...and a heart beat
couldn't make it through.


Details | I do not know? | |

bad word

godd.
i cant believe you.
how do you live with yourself.
i hate you.
with everything im made of.
the kicking,the yelling,the crying,the hitting,the pain.
its not even me.
its my best friend.
i love her more than anything.
you're going to be beaten.
defeated.
turned into nothing.
no job.
no family.
no love.
you're worthless.
you really are.
i hope you drop dead.
no.
i hope you suffer.
so much that you wish you were dead.
just like her.
you make her feel so bad.
because you're a horrible person.
"he kicked me over and over again and he was screaming and i was sobbing and yelling and
he was like hurting me so freaking bad i mean i have all these marks all over me and then
he bent down and was punching me and hitting me and kicking me and it was so hard i mean i
was just so upset and he picked me up and threw me. like on the wall. of the house. god it
hurt so freaking bad jess. and i was just like crumpled there, and he was like never tell
me ever again what to do you little girl. shut your mouth, and think about what will
happen next time you play this on me."
hearing that from my best friend.
kills me.
if i could.
i would make your life a living hell.
if this happens again.
trust me guy.
your life will suck.
and you'll hate everything.
and you won't have anyone to help you.
like your daughter does.
she has me.
and i love her more than anything.
so how about you think about what will happen next time you do that to her.


Details | Free verse | |

These Days, These Nights

These Days, These Nights


As days turn to nights

my bleek circumstances

are still a fright.



I don't want to talk to anybody,

I'm not interested in hanging out,

I'm an extrovert,

I'm just not myself lately.



Something has shifted in me,

my personality had drifted.

my life is ripping apart day by day,

as my heart did five years ago.



Everyday I hate him more,

each day I wish I had never been born.

every night I hate my life more and more.

Why is life such a bore to me now?




Details | Free verse | |

To me...

  
I left a realm of paper streets,
My feet as sharpened pencils,
To find another full of beats,
From problems solved with wrong utensils.

The thing in life I hate the most, 
If there is hate at all,
Is that forever running fast,
Makes you forget you fall.

Sometimes we do our very best to lose an easy battle,
Just to prove to all the rest that nothing can be settled.

It pains my mind to see a lot of racism, poverty, disease and sorrow,
Mainly because, I know my heart
Expects nothing different from tomorrow.

Changing the past, present and future cannot be done in a blink, 
But we have to pay to tutor the way we act and think.

No one was borne a wit of life,
Nobody dies with all accomplished.
We are too vain and we all strive,
So all the bad still stays unpunished.

Now I sit and walk and talk and try
To find a merry thing in existence,
Which throughout uttering “Good bye!”
Stays merry without any assistance.

There is no way to say this right, so it should be just written plain,
Without adding, without fright: Is this life really lived in vain?


Details | Blank verse | |

Strip Me

Strip me...
As you do, 
Youre claiming everything that I am
Youre seeing it all
Not just the physical;
The bruises,
The scars,
The imperfections,
(Even though thats just as hard),
But youre seeing what makes me
Who I am;
Youre stripping away layers of hurt
And pain in many areas;
Youre touching raw spots.
As you do this;
Youre stripping me emotionally;
Im letting you inside
By letting you see my body;
Im saying I want you everywhere;
Inside and out;
I want you to soothe 
The unsoothable parts
Im letting you feel me,
Touch me,
Do whatever you want...
Ive never known that kind of intimacy;
On the inside
Im trembling;
Im so afraid 
Youre going to see something
You dont like, 
Or dont want,
And that terrifies me;
The fact that you could hate something about me
And that could be a reason
To leave me...
I feel so insecure 
And I dont like it at all;
For your sake as much as mine.
I want you so badly, 
I want to let you in, 
Cuz I love you so much,
And youre the only person
I would let do this.
But I freeze up sometimes;
I dont know what to say,
I dont know how to feel;
Im just paralyzed with fear
Of rejection.
I hate that I didnt go all the way for you;
I feel like I don’t give you everything I want to;
And it sucks, like I don’t feel good enough 
And that you almost resent that
Im sorry, Baby for not giving it all
But it takes time I guess...
I dont know;
I want so bad to let you 'strip me'
Maybe next time I wont be so scared;
Its not you Im scared of;
Its me;
Whats going on in my head,
That I cant even explain;
Im scared Im not good enough
For you, 
And for myself...
That sounds messed up, 
And again,
I hate that Im scared,
Scared of putting myself out in the open
Completely like that...
It takes more courage than I have;
Maybe I can get that courage from you...
I want to...
I know I can...
I will...


Details | Free verse | |

WORDS

I’ve kept the words
Lots of words
All the history here 

The love the laughs 
The tears the hurts
The many memories.

I miss you hon, 
I really do
I miss our times of ease

What happened here
I can’t be sure
I feel so much disease

Time will tell 
And tears will fall
Thoughts will still prevail

I know that you
Have left me now
With never another tale

I hurt you know
I’m really sad
But you don’t want to know

Your happy here
You told me so
As long as I’m ok

You don’t care  
Or want to know
When I just can’t feel free

So go you now
And leave me be
With things that you don’t see

I hate this life
I hate false friends
I hate all this dis ease


Details | Free verse | |

angry little girl

I'm such a whore,
Don't you adore me?
I'm such an angry little girl,
Don't you hate me?
Because I'm so unique,
Because I'm not afraid,
Because I want you to hate me,
I want you to know I'm angry.


Details | I do not know? | |

Delusions

Sick and disgusted,
I hate all of my visions.
Someone who loves me,
What an impossible conclusion.
Connected together,
Like the bonds of fusion.
Just to be left again,
Suffering from confusion.
Sick and disgusted,
I hate all of my delusions.
Finding true love, like I said,
An impossible conclusion.


Details | Pantoum | |

If She Only Knew

Her veil had become painted with dark misery
As once what was bliss, has now disappeared
The dreams with this man were faded and dreary
Her love turned quickly to hate and to fears

As once what was bliss, has now disappeared
His hands became weapons, stabbing at her heart
Her love turned quickly to hate and to fears
Now knowing from this life, she now must depart

His hands became weapons, stabbing at her heart
He was no longer the man she thought she had known
Now knowing from this life, she now must depart
She prays to find a life she can call her very own

He was no longer the man she thought she had known
The dreams with this man were faded and dreary
She prays to find a life she can call her very own
Her veil had become painted with dark misery


Details | I do not know? | |

Things I Hate! But On The Other Hand,...

I hate the cold,
but I love the fresh fallen snow.
I hate busy signals,
but guess what, I’M always on the phone.

I hate the smell of cigarette smoke,
but never think of that ‘til I take the last puff.
I hate doing laundry,
but the smell of clean clothes,.. I just can’t get enough.

I hate traffic,
but I always drive at peak hours.
I hate getting in arguments,
but I always loved receiving those “making up” flowers.

I hate the first of the month, having those bills I must 
sit down and pay,
but I certainly didn’t have a problem at the time I was
running them up, I must say.

I hate to go shopping for clothes,
but always complain, I have nothing to wear.
I guess the alternative is a nudist camp,
but I don’t think I could ever go there.

I hate driving in the rain,
but sometimes the other choice is sitting home alone.
I hate getting old,
but I sure love thinking about all of the things I’ve done.

These are a few of the things that I hate.
I try not to think of them much.
But the thing I hate most in life is death,
and missing his sweet gentle touch.






 


Details | Bio | |

Sister.

Sister dear,
I don't love you.
I don't think I ever have.
Maybe the first time I saw you,
But the second all attention went on you,
I was gone.

I know our parents love you more,
Give you more,
Care for you more.
They say they have their reasons...
Well I havent heard one.
You alway were put first,
Never once I got put in first.

I do have to say,
That when I see that,
I do cry alittle,
But then no one cares...
So Whats the purpose?

I wish you were gone,
Sometimes I came close to making you gone,
But then our parents would hate me even more.

Mom and Dad always say they love you,
I barely hear that anymore,
When I do, I figure it's all a lie,
Cause that one day,
That one day they told me, that I have broken their hearts.
That was all it took for me to say,
I HATE YOU!


Details | Free verse | |

Father's Day (but you were never one to me)

today is fathers day
cant you see the joy in my smile
you know:
the smile you stiched on my face
so no one would know that i hate you
i got you a card
you should read it
cause i didnt write it
everyone buys cards
that they dont write
so what is inside
in reality
means nothing
oh!
i also made you breakfast
try it.
its good.
filled with cyanide
i mean love
ha that was a joke
(not really)
oh and also
mom left you
stole your money
took my sister
slept with your best friend
oh!
and she said to tell you:
I HATE YOU.
i hate you
too.
she's lucky
she can leave.
i can't wait til i can leave
only 10 more years til i can smoke legally
isnt sad that im so young and hate you so.
so
so...
so............
so.................
very very very very very very
LITTLE!!!!!!!
happy father's day
you failure


Details | Free verse | |

Unwanted Life

Why do I hate myself, my life overall
It seems as if happiness was my first downfall
Then pain and criticism seemed to follow
Is it possible for a man’s heart to be so hollow
My vales shallow, my dreams long gone
Since my birth date my life has never seen the sun
Never known the meaning of fun, or the true meaning of my being alive
If I want to live is what I’m trying to decide
All my life I have denied, these feelings of insecurity
Intriguingly, I can always seem to find
Someone who: thinks I'm special, so truly divine
And I always wonder how you could love a face like mine
But I live my life afraid and ashamed
Disgraced at how I look, even how my body’s framed
It’s as if I was trained, to find the negative in all
Never do I have anything positive to recall
For my mind is full of hate and my heart full of shame
There is no one but myself to blame
Because when I search in my soul all I seem to find
Is a young man’s life running out of time


Details | Ballad | |

good day.

2:45 in the morning as I turn off the alarm before it sounds,
it's something that fills I've been doing all my life,
a scratch of the head as I look in the mirror, with a smile not a frown,
thank you for allowing me to wake and take care a my kids and wife.
as the cold water washes over my face...life is catching a tune,
as I brush away the bad breath of night the smell of coffee fills the house,
a new day awaits a new me and I'll hold this filling way past noon,
as I tie the final lace on my boots I look over and kiss my spouse,
into the kitchen the clock reads 3:10am, right on time,
I pour my coffee pack my lunch and count my blessings 
never wondering what awaits me that would be a crime,
I take one last moment one last thought...no nothing missing
I turn off the lights and quietly open the door to start another day
work is a five mile bike ride away and in Jan. being cold is nothing new
as I start off down the street I take one last look up and say
good morning mom keep my family safe as I do what I do,
as I watch the other eyes that view a new day some thing is missing
their frown their lack of life the hollow sound in their voice
good morning is as piercing to them as a harpoon some not even listing,
the first words spoken negative, depressing, like waking up was there choice,
you read the paper listen to the news see it all around you,
hate...greed...lost souls swimming in fear of what will be...
cursing the past,regretting the present, and protesting a new,
we all have had our share we just hold it different that is clear to see,
if I listen to them long enough my smile turns to a grin...
and I think how can you be so pompous that you hate the gift of life,
I know "not all of us have had a good life" COME ON!...look within,
your breathing,you have,you may have lost love even a wife
but that is why we are given a new day,
I've had hate spoon fed to me as a child,I was told there is no tomorrow
I'm 39...no riches ever poured over me,I know that Is not the way,
every day is up hill,it's a new challenge...and I won't fill it with sorrow.
at days end I know I can close my eyes knowing I respected the day 
I made my wife smile I told my kids I love them and took advantage of it all
if this day was my last...I would like to know I spent it in a good way
not complaining, whining,or crying...I picked my self up I didn't crawl.


Details | I do not know? | |

Pretend

I love how we pretend that I don’t feel anything for you.
As if it really were a clean slate.
As if you never even knew.

I love how you pretend how I don’t turn bright red,
                        whenever you come close.
As if I don’t like you in that way.
As if I only see you as a friend.

I love how you pretended not to notice that I secretly like playing spin the bottle.
When you kissed me on the cheek.
Just like little kids.

I hate how you pretend not to notice things I want you to know.
B ut I love how you don’t hate me for those things.


Details | Quatrain | |

at the altar

what do we bring to sacrifice,
to the altar of our fears
will the fear, itself, suffice
to wipe away these grieving tears

here, a satchel i take in stride
through the machine, my will to cede
and here, too, a bag of my pride
that it turns out, i didn't need

that old man has a video camera
and a young one totes a backpack
can we turn them outta here
for the bravery that i lack

and the child so innocent beside her,
that woman there with righteous shawl,
are mother and child vengeful saboteurs
would a flash of hate burst my wall

do i send my firstborn far away
did the world change to get more hate
is that the price my dread must pay
is that all my fright can relate

when i stand on this serene beach
is evil banished from my sight
is the violent tsunami out of reach
if i waive some liberty, some right

should land's crust pull asunder
and an abyss drop before my feet
would relinquishing fear pull me under
would, then, i go down in defeat

my god, what must i do to appease
when i stand before some conflagration
to vindicate, to assuage, to please
must i change my life's foundation

or can i only fear fear itself
to live as those i remember might want
take life day-to-day from off the shelf
without hate and fear, my dreams to haunt

Armageddon might be without love
but my world today is more than this
i refuse to live life devoid of
love and empathy and a bit of bliss

© Goode Guy 2011-09-08


Details | Free verse | |

Love Hurts

Love hurts
The tears fall
The heart aches
Hugs and kisses
Gentle touch
Doesn't change
What's been said
or what's been done
Apologize
Exceptance
Everythings the same
His dark eyes
And cute smile
Make me melt
And forgive and foget
But what's the difference
He cries
I cry
We try
But it fails
We can't both be happy
No matter what
Call it life
Call it disagreeing
Whatever
It sucks
I hate fighting
I hate the tears
I hate the pain
I feel the guilt
He calls it emotions 
I call it my fault
He's amazing
It'll work out
Is what he says
I'm afraid 
To lose him
To lose us
But yet we don't try
Not enough
It's easier 
Said than done
I say change 
We stay the same
He's amazing
For putting up with me
And for loving me
He deserves the world
But it's not mine to give
I love him
He means the world to me


Details | Rhyme | |

THIS JOB

I hate this job completely,
I hate it totally.

It makes no sense any time, 
and I'm treated unjustly.

The insurance and the benefits
they say out weigh the stress.

But so far I cannot see it
and I am a total mess.

I hate this job completely,
I hate it totally.


Details | I do not know? | |

Lies Are Everything

The things that I have been told
The secrets I will always hold
I hate being lied to
I hate being decieved
Many lies that I have believed
Why is the world so cruel
I feel like eveyone's tool
Please do not lie or I will cry
I have felt this pain so long
I know I must die...


Details | Blank verse | |

I HATE YOU

I HATE YOU SO MUCH
I HATE YOU SO MUCH 
THAT I AM ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT YOU,
I HATE YOU SO MUCH 
THAT EVERYTIME I SEE YOU I STILL WANT 
TO KISS YOU, HOLD YOU AND NEVER LET GO.
I HATE YOU SO MUCH FOR NOT BEING ABLE 
TO SHARE WHAT I HAVE AND NOT BEING 
ABLE TO GIVE YOU WHAT YOU NEED
I HATE YOU SO MUCH FOR LOVING ME ONES 
AND NEVER LOVING ME AGAIN, THAT EVEN 
WHEN YOU TELL ME YOU ARE GOING TO 
BETTER YOUR LIFE, I WISH YOU WELL, 
I HATE YOU TO THE POINT THAT REGRETS IS 
ALL I HAVE. REGRETS OF NOT BEING WITH YOU 
OF NOT BEING ABLE TO SPEAK TO YOU WHEN 
EVER I NEED A FRIEND,
I HATE YOU I REALLY DO FOR EVERYTIME I SEE 
YOU I THINK OF OUR GOOD TIME AND OF WHAT 
COULD OF HAVE BEEN.
I HATE YOU FOR NOT ENJOYING WHAT I HAVE 
BECAUSE ALL I WANTED WAS YOU.
I HATE YOU FOR NOT WANTING TO REALIVE OUR 
MEMORIES EVEN IF IT’S JUST FOR ONE NIGHT.
I HATE YOU FOR GETTING IN TO MY HEART AND 
ME NOT BEING ABLE TO GET YOU OUT.
I HATE YOU FOR LOVING ME,
I HATE YOU FOR EVERYTIME I WANT TO HATE YOU 
ALL I DO IS MISS YOU
I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU, I HATE YOU?


Details | Lyric | |

Unknown Thoughts

     So much goes through my mind
From death, love to hate and pain.
Not sure if it's all about me
Or if it's just simply the way i see it

     I can't help but think of the past.
All the heartbreaks, all the family issues
That I’ve had in the past. 
I don't know what to do or how to act

     With my Father never there and stuck with mom
Always disappointing the family with all of my problems
Having disabilities that interfere with my life
Been going to therapy since I was three

     Now I’m older, and yet still have problems
I have a dad that's always there and doesn't act like a jackass
My life doesn't seem as hard

       Though it is, and now I’m in high school
The hard times have just begun
Yet from all the hard things I’ve faced in life
They only make me stronger

      No pain ever hurts me for I’ve felt it all
From feeling worthless and good for nothing
To being heartbroken and out of place
Lost and unforgiving 
To hate and love 
And pain and pleasure
I felt it all
But what now?


Details | Free verse | |

You Hate To Admit It

sometimes in life we come face to face with facts that we don't want to accept.
needlessly to say, we must take the good with the bad
                                                        the better with the worse
                                                        the happy with the sad.
and even though waht you want is not always what you get, in the end...it'l work 
out for your good.
that's what a friend once told me, but it's hard to hear that from someone that you 
like.
especially when you find yourself attache to them, it seems, in just one night.
you even tell yourself, "don't put your emotions in it".
but, how can you abide by that when your desires are tied in it?
he awakens things in you that you didn't know were there.
you unleash burnign desires, as your body begins to yearn for him.
with every comment (mySpace) you want him more.
with every message (mySpace) he gets closer to your hearts door.
you can't contain yourself.
you try to get away, but this feeling is over taking your sould day by day.

you hate to admit it, but you're pheening for him.
and with every encounter, your desire grows stronger for him.
you hate to admit it, but you're longing for him.
and with every conversation, you grow closer to him.

each and everyday, he's the one you look forward to.
even while walking the halls at school, you find yourself wanting to...
be close to him, to feel his touch
just one wish...is that even enough?
you notice him, while he's noticing you.
you're smiling and blushing, what's gotten into you?
HIM, yea he's all in your brain
his compliments touch your heart like drops of rain.

you hate to admit it, but you're pheening for him.
and with every encounter, your desire grows stronger for him.
you hate to admit it, but you're longing for him.
and with every conversation, you grow closer to


Details | Verse | |

Can't Stand It Anymore

Can’t Stand It Anymore

Something’s wrong
Oh, it’s you…

I dislike your choices of what to wear today
I am put off by that complexion
I cannot stand that way you stand
With that superior air about you
I really can’t accept that way you giggle like it was a joke

I strongly dislike your straight A average
I really loathe your humor
I cannot stand your bubbly aura
I just can’t deal with your perfume
I absolutely abhor your choices
Of what you wish to pursue

I cannot stand your tediousness
I really hate your smile
I absolutely loathe your eyes
As equally as I hate your friendly persona
I just can’t look at that stupidly perfect little face
I can’t live with your little moans and groans
And especially not that annoying wailing you make called crying

I hate the fact that you’re constantly involved
I hate that little noise you make when bored
I hate your blatant honesty
I can’t stand the way you speak in riddles
I hate how you look at me most of all
Because of how you look at him


Details | Free verse | |

Falling Dreams

* This was written for someone dear to me. *



Falling Dreams
     by Amy Swanson (c) 2007


Falling... falling...
    ... so much in my head...

is it even worth it
    to get out of bed?

Really not sure, can I face the day


But life goes on...

      life goes on.

             I'll find a way.


I can't explain exactly why it is I feel so blue
    but I would bet some money, it still has to do with you!

People go through harder things, and this I understand - 
    but my world's been turned upside down completely by a man.


I've been through this before
    should have recognized it when
          the problem started knocking at my door.


I hate this feeling... hate what you have done to us.

And you don't even care;
       No, you don't even care.


Destroyed my security
and made me doubt our unity -
true love is such a rarity.


And so it's left to me
patch the pieces of this life
Make believe I feel no pain...

            and go on as your wife.



But... my heart still feels fractured
         betrayed and torn

And in my dreams I will be

Falling...

falling...

falling.


Details | I do not know? | |

For Compassion

for compassion...

hate like silent venom flows
spewing forth in dribs and drabs

how will the wounds ever heal
with such vitriol tearing at the scabs

we shudder at the words of hate
and wonder will it ever cease

but hope springs forth for
we know it begins within us, now, today

with the simplest acts of human compassion
so that gentle love may banish the hate away



Details | Free verse | |

a formidable enemy

an enemy who has stuck with you since the day you met them 
is a commendable one,
for it is they that have stayed constant & strong
when others have come & gone
it is them that have paid attention, read all your work, seen all your films,
observed all your paintings, heard everything that came out of your mouth
(and thought long & hard about it), laboriously monitored all your actions &
dreamt up new & interesting ways to
**** you over,
all day,
every day,
spiraling out into infinity &
that,
that is something that you just can’t buy,
you can’t sell on ebay &
you sure as hell wouldn’t give up 
for a week in the bahamas
or a winter lodge in aspen.

a formidable enemy is more like you than you realize,
because they understand exactly where you are & at the crossroads,
choose to go left,
instead of right or
right when you go left---
either way, they may use every itty bit of the hate that they can muster in their arsenal to
do their best to destroy you,
or they might just dream of your death in a lingering manner
while playing with their sautéed vegetables
while out to dinner with their main squeeze.

most of all,
this enemy,
of which you have the greatest admiration,
will ultimately outlive you 
(be it physically, or having passed on their hatred of you to others who now have come to hate you as well, having studied under this genius),
and for that, you are eternally indebted to them,
because it is the enemy, so strong & so determined to
stop you,
which provokes you & forces you to use your built up
reservoir of anger
in the most efficacious way possible.


Details | Free verse | |

You Were Loved

Why have you left me
All alone in this world
We were supposed to be
Spending our life together
We had so many plans
Our life laid out before us
My love for you was strong
But it wasn't enough
For you gave up on life
Gave up on us
I wish I could hate you
For leaving me behind
But I don't, I can't
I hate the one who took you
The man who went for a drive
After a night of drinking with his buddies
He was the one who ruined our life
Because of him, you are gone
And I remain here on earth
So sad and alone without you
I'll always love you
You'll always be in my heart
If you can hear me up above
Know that you were always loved
That I will forever cherish
The time we did have
I love you
Now I must move on


Details | I do not know? | |

Hurting

I don't know how you can live knowing,
You know every moment you're near me I hurt,
You ignore me like I'm nothing,
Like I was made to let you hate me,
I'm tired of all the things you do,
and even more mad of the things you don't do,
You put me down and laugh in my face,
You don't care if I cry,
You don't love me,
My heart breaks as you force me away,
When I need you you're never there,
You have left me with so much despair,
I'm more depressed everyday,
Just because you don't see me,
I feel like I'm invisible for you,
and that it's not going to change,
I hope you enjoy making me feel pain,
I have decided to forget you and move on,
I hate you for hurting me


Details | I do not know? | |

My life and how she ruined it (part 1 see part 2 it was too long)

My life is broken 
My dreams are crushed
I cant trust her 
And my life is wrecked
My plans are destroyed
And my life is down the drain
They are mad
And they hate me
The broken one is dying
I cant do anything 
I’m not in the mood
Suicide isn’t an option
My sweater is gone
My gasses broke
Body out of shape
Invisible
I know mom is right
But I just cant do it
If her parents knew who she was
They’d kill her
She deserves it 
She wrecked my life
There are no loopholes
I want to die
I want to die
I just cant take this anymore
If I were not born would it have been better
For her
For them 
For my family 
For my old friends?
I am dead
And broke
My parents cant afford me
My aunt lost her job
With the bad economy
It makes my heart throb
I should get a job
To help pay
Should I sell all my stuff
Or just move away?
I was just in heaven 
On cloud 100
Higher than high
Then I fell to hell!
Burning in fire
In a big pit
And I keep sinking deeper 
And soon I’ll be dead.
I cant do this
I’m not suppose to cry
But I fell and fell
And well now the reader of this can just go to hell!
So go away and live your life I’ll just burn in hell
And be a lifeless piece of knife 
He yells
She yells
Everything is destroyed
I should just leave and sell everything
They could still get a good probably $750 for this laptop
130 for my new camera
A good 20 for my computer stand
Probably 35 for my old computer
And maybe 120 all together for my animals
500 for the piano
150 for my waterbed
15 for my rug
And more for all my toys downstairs
I want to die 
I want to die
School is a bore
I am already a dork
I’m just another spoon or fork
I hate my life and I hate her 
If he was here I cry to him
But he is dead
I cant go to his/grandma/my dog
My life is a mess
I hate it
I want to go to my aunt’s house
I want to move
To die
To cry
To murder
To sue 
To leave money for my parents
Them kill myself
I cant go 
Not like this
She stormed out
He is incredibly angry 
Because of me
Because of life
Because of her!
My life is wrecked 
But because of mine so is theirs
I want to fit it
But I can’t
They yell and scream
I tighten and cry
I can’t get between them it’s like they pick sides
They have frustrations
Because of me
But if I wasn’t born they wouldn’t have
They could be
Alone 
Peaceful
Happy 
Stress free
But that’s not the cause I am here 
Wishing I’m not
And it’s all because of her
That I’m put on the spot


Details | Romanticism | |

MY LOVE IS TOO BLIND TO SEE

Why do you turn away from me?
Why don't you want to be bothered?
This reminds me of a similar poem,
Named 'My Dearest Father'
I hate being hurt.
I hate being alone.
Never realized what I had
Until it was already gone.
This is what you're thinking,
Or this is what you've said.
It's funny how you dont want to be bothered,
And how your messing with my head.
I cry myself to sleep, 
Almost every night.
Wondering if I still have your love,
And if I did everything right.
Maybe you dont understand this,
You mean the world to me.
But really I guess for you,
My love is too blind to see.


Details | I do not know? | |

Stress

I stress,
I feel less,
Of a person,
Everyday my life werson,
I hate this.

I want out,
I don't want want people to doubt,
That I'm nice,
My heart isn't as cold as ice,
I am kind.

I don't want to be Alone,
i want things to be known,
I want my old life back,
This one is wack,
I hate this.


Details | I do not know? | |

don't

you make me insane.
you put butterflies in my stomach.
i always get the tingly feeling right above my collar bone.
whenever i see you.talk to you.look at you.
when i hug you,i hate letting go.
when im with you,i hate leaving.
when i look at you,i hate looking away.
im scared.
im scared of letting my self go.
i think i already have.
i hate when you doubt me.
it makes me feel bad about myself.
you saved me.
you are saving me.
please don't leave me.
please don't hate me.
please don't betray me.


Details | Free verse | |

Loose ends and fallling down over untied laces.

There is this feeling I don't like
Loose ends

They drive me crazy
It's like when you fall asleep on the floor watching TV and you wake up
The TV is still going and all the lights are still on
You're drooling everywhere. 
And you've been out cold for a couple of hours. 

It's that feeling of, "What the heck happened?"
What did I miss?
And then you are so exhausted that you just get up and shut off the TV
And then stalk off to your room
Then you wake up the next day and that feeling is even worse,

Especially the second you wake up in the morning and you are
Tired 
Grouchy
And just plain not doing good,
That feeling of loose ends just makes you want to cry.
Its so irritating... just rubbing..rubbing
Rubbing you the wrong way.

Because you fell asleep the night before on your living room floor
Thus creating billions of loose ends.
And uneasy feelings
Its terrible
Loose ends...I hate them
I just hate the feeling that something is out of place

Or the fact that you missed something huge.
Something worthwhile 
And you missed it because you were asleep on your living room floor

Something is seriously wrong.
Its like something was supposed to happen
And the fact that it didn't, makes everything all fall out of wack.
And get messed up

I hate loose ends.


Details | Free verse | |

Strife Today

I don’t want any strife
None in my life
Perilous it would be
I would hate to see
The fear I would have
Cutting deep in my calve
Crying an option negative
For strife could shiv
My sacred heart
Forever impart
Don’t hate me
For being me
And freeing myself
From disbelief
I would fall apart
Losing my heart
From the terrible fate
You, on a separate date
I wanting to hold you
But your soul flew
Away
Today

Russell Sivey


Details | Lyric | |

The Woman In Me

I sit here every day and look out the window
I know there is a whole world out there for me to see
And I wonder how I let him destroy the woman in me
As I stand here and see myself in the mirror
I hate my body I hate my hair I hate my face
I think they are all a big disgrace
He shattered my hopes
And stepped on my dreams
He even destroyed all my self-esteem
I find it hard to smile
And hard to laugh
Sometimes I don't even feel like taking a bath
Sometimes I wish I would just fade away
Just so I wont have to be like this for another day
I often think who will be next
Whose heart he'll rip right out of their chest
Someday it will end and I will be free
To go out and find the woman in me..


Details | I do not know? | |

Love and Hate

I hate you just for being you,
I hate you all the time,
I hate the way you act stupid,
I hate the way you make me cry,
I hate you when you're around,
and even more when you're not,
I hate the way you make me laugh,
I hate that you make me feel butterflies,
I hate the way you confuse me,
I hate when people tell me you're just using me,
I hate that I love you,
and even more because you love me too,
I hate the fact that you're a great guy,
and I can't see the whole real you,
I hate how you kiss me whenever you like,
I hate how you always work on your bike,
I hate the way I miss you,
Whenever you leave me for a while,
I hate the way you make me feel so special,
No matter what day its always a surprise,
I hate that I don't hate you,
and what I feel is really love,
So when I say I hate the things you do,
It means I love you just for being you,
What I feel for you is between love and hate,
and maybe that can be something great


Details | I do not know? | |

Things I Hate

I hate homework,
I hate school,
I hate people who break the rules,
I hate people who think they are better then me,
I hate these people because they're stuck up,
They think whatever they do they won't be stopped,
I hate people who think they're so cool,
All I say to them is wow what a big fool,
I hate people who think they're so smart,
If I could I would throw at them a dart,
I hate people who pretend to be my friends,
Who just use me and ditch me at the end,
I hate people that can do everything,
I hate the fact that they think they can sing,
I hate these people because they make me feel bad,
They do lots of stuff to make me get mad,
I hate these peopl because they make me feel worhtless,
these peopl I hate just seem to be heartless,
Now I am sitting here thinking,
While all the while they were just hating,
I thought they were better but now I see I was wrong,
The thoughts I still have about these people are long,
I know the nice things they lack,
One day they'll be sorry and wish they could take everything back,
But now that I've realized they are nothing,
I can now move on to a better something


Details | Free verse | |

What is Love

What is love,
 
 
 
And what is their to life except love? 
 
 
 
What is every other thing we do but pointless?
 
 
What isn't pointless, except love?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
And what is life without love?
 
 
What am I  without love?
 
 
What are you?
 
 
Are we nothing? 
 
 
Are we everything?
 
 
Are we at least something?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
And why is hate so foreign a concept to our view of love?
 
 
Is it not true that love and hate are connected. if only by the tiniest thread?
 
 
What is hate without love to feul it, and what is love without hate to duel it?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
And how can one truly ever appreciate the love given to them when one cannot at least recognize hate, if not know it personally?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
And why is the human species as a whole so insignificant compared to it?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
If not the air we breathe, the food we eat, and the water we drink?
 
 
Is love the people around us?
 
 
Is love the words we speak or the havoc we wreak?
 
 
 
 
 
What is love,
 
 
but a foreign word very few know the meaning of?


Details | I do not know? | |

The Immigrant

The Immigrant


Seeking solace. 
Seeking a home.

The immigrant finds, 

rotten prejudice. 
Fungal anger. 

The immigrant, 

alone, hoping for, 

A solitary chance. 

To belong. 

The immigrant, 
alone, always, 

an outside entity. 
Eternal outcast. 

A viral threat. 
A reeking odour. 


The immigrant, 

ever alone, 
and alone knowing, 
that no place exists, 
but that lost home.


Details | Bio | |

To many problems

It’s about that time that I grow up and see that my family is getting to out of hand.
My momma is acting crazier than she’s ever in her life.
Over a man, over the way she treats me and my sisters, to just all family 
problems.
She acts like she 7 years old, always going crying to somebody because things 
ain’t going her way.
To make it like me and my sister Tyesha is the bad guys.
I hate the fact that I have to sit and see it all go down, but what can I do.
I’m almost grown.
To many problems in my life, that needs to be fixed,
Or too many people are going to be hurt including me.
I hate my life right now, and that’s sad to say.
But with everything going on with me that how I felt for a long time now.
It looks like I’ll be leaving home in a little bit, but I don’t want to do that.
I’m still scared to be on my own in life, I don’t really know what to do.
Too many problems is making me have another nerves breakdown, I don’t have 
time for it.
I’m a senior now, and I need to do what I need to do and get out of here.
I have too many problems in my life that I hate to talk about but I need to.
So to all my problems please leave me alone, and let me be.
So I’m go start praying to God to help me though things that’s going to make me 
a better person.


Details | Epic | |

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

DO you want to know what i hate ? i hate how when a man sleeps with a whole bunch of girls
hes a pimp and master like a god to men and women but when a woman does the same shes a
whore slut or even a piece a trash and women call them th same first  of all its wrong and
second is that is totally sexism  so next time you are sleeping with a whole bunch of
girls and your girl does the same before you call her a slut or anything think  you did
the same exact thing  also another thing is  when a girl does a sport or there is just a
girls sport its dumb but oh no not a guys its so mean and cruel listen guys if a women
does the same thing as a guy ITS THE SAME THING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SO unless you men or women have a better reason to make me say oh there different well
then tell me  cause its really ticking me off


Details | Rhyme | |

I Hate Love

I hate love.
I don't like him.
I hate to feel.
I hate to see him,
Coming around.

I hate love,
Leave from,
My heart's town hall.
You came around for me,
And for you I didn't call.

I wish you would fall from heaven,
Like Lucifer did.
You got me running in circles,
Like a little kid.

Love, I hate you.
Leave me alone.
Get off my heart's phone.
Take the freaking dial tone.


wrote 1-20-10


Details | Free verse | |

Freestyle Thought

Like a messiah nailed down.
Steaks are high...
Cant ask why, for me, it's do or die.
You would have to live it to get it.
To see why I couldnt regret it.
To see what the significance is.
What the brilliance in my defiance and unwillingness of compliance is.
Pushes me to blow minds with ambition as ammunition.
All these years, tears.
I would bring to your eye.
But, dont give me your pitty.
I need you to hate me.
Like clock work.
Tic-Toc goes the sound of the cocked glock.
And should it bring my demise.
The word of the wise would say.
Hell hath no fury like the fire that burned in his eyes when he was alive.
It is the uncomparable what I pour onto this paper.
Yet, here I am still behind the sceens.
Breaking my back just trying to get my work seen.
Looking for a way in.
Or a way out.
Dying inside every minute I cant figure it out.
Take a walk in my shoes.
And realize you couldnt even lift your feet.
Instantly submerged in my missouri, you would be.
Immidiatly gasping for air.
And find that you cant find any anywhere.
Twelve.
Twentey-Eight.
Eighty-Seven.
Concieved into a twisted society of cocaine elietests.
With an evanesence of an I used to give a damn state of mind.
But, try as I might I could never rewind the hand of time.
Or the blind crime that is this story.
But, please. I beg you.
I need you to keep feeding my flame.
So that I may kill and maime you with these words I spray.
Decay your brain of thoughts tought to you in vein.
Dulled pain, something like the two vikaden pills distilled under my tounge.
Or the loaded gun, I cock and bust at my temple just for fun.
Only to see the bullets bounce off me like im here for a reason.
And its only through this ink that I can seem to realease this demon.
This demon, a heathen.
Fallen from grace.
Like I, In a world limited by race.
But, inflamed and enraged by the anger hate and violance.


Details | Alliteration | |

Daddy

for this girl of 6,
so lost and unfree,
her father abandon her,
"where are you daddy?"
scared to the flesh ,
she searches her home,
looks at the id,
no one called on the phone,
as she finally stops,
she gives into herself,
she knows hes gone,
nd left her in hell,
the tears fall down,
as she covers her eyes,
her face gets redder,
as she crys and crys,
"mommy is dead"
"lying on the floor"
"its all your fault daddy"
"i love you no more"
as she quietly shivers,
she remembers the past,
her mom was at home,
he shot her ass,
"whyd you do it daddy"
"whyd you shoot mommy"
"how could you do it",
"when you loved her softly"
so she went on her life
and remembered as she grew up,
"i hate you daddy"
"i hate your guts".


Details | Epic | |

Night Sweat

 Why would you believe in me why would you trust me I build you up to knock you 
down I love you but I will not stand my ground. You know me all to well certain 
things I wish you wouldn't tell, I hate you in the same breath I find solace in your 
bed I crept. You give me strength when you hurt me you give me hope not 
deserving you rain on me to shine on you in hopes of my return to you. But I must 
tell you never again will I be sucked into your life of sin the drama is to much the 
pain drives me insane. Darken my sun for your own sick fun my cold heart only  
just begun, enough I'm done play time is over gosh I hate you, you sorry excuse 
your time is up karma will come home to roost.


Details | Free verse | |

Desecration State of Mind

Living in a time when time stands still,
society is mentally ill for the dollar bill.
This pension state of mind; contract extension
state of mind,
so afraid of being left behind, 
so afraid of being left behind.
Social security; unprecedented 
insecurities.
Slow, Jesus, come before me today,
I hope you’re on your way.
Slow Jesus, come before me today,
please come show me the way.
Fight for a cause misunderstood;
try and spend a cold night in the hood.
It’s a real sad story, a real-life
unhappy ending.
Mothers and fathers have so much to say,
mothers and fathers need so much today.
Food stamps and welfare checks, corporate laundry and
cost-cutting specs. 
Slow, Jesus, come before me today,
I hope you’re on your way.
Slow Jesus, come before me today,
please come show me the way.
Looking for the sixth dimension
you soon find that hate is overstated; take a look around
you soon find that hate is over rated.
Perform soul-search and you’ll see you’ve made it;
high above a world so jaded, high above a
love loss faded.
A feeling that cannot be imitated, when you take your hate and
desecrate it.
Slow, Jesus, let’s talk more tomorrow,
I’ve found the love you asked to borrow.
Slow Jesus, let’s talk more tomorrow,
no longer will the world breed sorrow.


Details | I do not know? | |

Was I Condemned?

Was I condemned from the start
To live life with this heart
That's filled up with so much hate and pain
No sunshine just rain
When I try to go 
Forward, try to fly right
They tell me I'm wrong
Never will I be right
My feelings locked
In a cage
I have so much damn rage
Rains of hate 
Cast down upon me
Tears of hurt
Falls down my cheeks
Razor blades tearing at my soul...

Was I condemned from the start
To live life with this heart
That's filled up with so much hate and pain
No sunshine just rain...


Details | ABC | |

love

How I feel I can not say.
Can anyone put in to words when they feel this way.
Love is life and life is love.
There is nothing greater that god has sent to us from up above.
Now and then we like to say.
We hate love in every sort of way.
We all no this is a lie.
For with out love none of us could get by.
Its in are hearts its in are soils.
It makes us cry but it makes us whole.
This thing called love we hate so much.
But could any of us live without its touch.


Details | Lyric | |

Lyric

At sixteen, I'm happy
but not popular
because I'm shy,
people get mad at me
because I don't talk
people hate me
because I'm not rich and I'm
not like them I'm only a
human not a shopping fanatic
I'm going through a lot of pressure
by my peers
my friends hate each other
they always fight
hey I'm only sixteen i've still
got time to figure things out
just let me be myself
not someone I'm not.


Details | Free verse | |

Me!

Yeah this is me
This is who i'am 
You could hate me or love 
Its really up to you
You can judge me for my beliefs 
You can hate me for my beauty
But i'll still be me
Sweet ole wonderful me


Details | Free verse | |

Walking Away

I finally let you go and surprisingly, it was easy for me to do.  You made it easy for 
me to walk away.  You came into my life again after months of emotional torture 
and for an instant, I was happy.  But after the happiness left, the reoccurring pain 
came back.  The pain that I had been so used to feeling from our past 
relationship.  That pain had become part of my daily routine.  It was there when I 
woke up and was with me when I went to sleep.  All the lies, the yelling, the harsh 
words, and the emotional and mental abuse had become too much.  It had 
started to consume my life.  But still, after everything, all that you put me through, I 
still care.  I care about you more than I care about anything in the entire world.  I 
care about your life, the decisions you make, and that path you will take.  I care 
about everything you are and everything you will become.  I don’t know why and 
honestly, I hate it.  I try to stop caring and let go.  I try to hate you by reminding 
myself of everything bad that you did to me.  But when I think about that, it 
reminds me of all the bad things that you are doing to yourself and for some odd 
and obscure reason, it only makes it worse.  It only makes me care more.  It was 
easy to walk away from the pain you made me feel.  But it was torture walking 
away from you, not knowing how you’re going to turn out, or if you will be ok.  I try 
so hard to let it go and to not care, but I can’t do it.  I can’t control the way I feel.  
No matter what you do to me, no matter how you make me feel I will always care.  
I will always pray.  I will always love you, and I will always hope that one day, you 
will make the choice to leave the past behind you and surrender your life to Christ.


Details | Blank verse | |

One Day...

you know what, one day your going to look back and think. 
think about all the memories, good time, fight, heartbreaks, and laughter. 
and your going to say to yourself the world was in my hands. 
while now i think i'm the scum of the earth how could i ever be the world? 
i'm imperfect in the most strange and demented form of weirdness. 
i won't try new foods, and i hate odd smells. 
i've never been a fan of myself or the way you laugh at me when i forget things. 
i get depressed to the point where i want to curl up and die just because of a comment 
someone made. 
when people look at me i tell myself that it's because they hate me and if they ever say 
something to me it's out of the pity for such a loser. 
my hair could never be done to my satisfaction, i yell at inanimate objects and i feel like my 
pillow is my diary. 
i trust people with my heart just to find that they will tear it to pieces and twist my pain of 
unforgiveness on myself. 
these are just mere examples of my imperfection, yeah theres a lot more believe it or not. 
but when you think that the exact opposite of me is what you wanted, your going to realize i 
was exactly what you were looking for. 
but time won't stop and rewind itself like it does for you in the movies it will continue moving 
and almost faster. 
all the while regret in the back of your mind. 
and me i'll think and move on because i was so blessed, thanking god for steering my life in 
the right direction. 
so i am clearly not saying that if you choose me right now your life is going to be perfect and 
have the perfect happy ending like those stories always seem to have because i am not 
perfect. 
things won't always be easy but sometimes miracles do happen and tomorrow will surpass 
yesterday, 
but you were too blind to even turn your head and view the future.


Details | Rhyme | |

Ode to Humanity

It seems like my life is always lacking. Too many blurry faces passing. It's like living in a time when the world is gone, No one can agree because everyone is wrong. If we all could take time to appreciate our lives, And stop believing and telling these foolish lies, Maybe then we could live in harmony, In a world full of love like it was meant to be. I wish I could tell them all the way I feel, But no one will believe because it's so unreal. This idea that we all could be at peace, And we all could be each other's release. Maybe one day we could find some common ground Lying somewhere in the Lost & Found. But you know this is just the way it goes, When all this hatred just overflows. In a time when no one can just understand What it's like to walk with each other hand in hand. It all comes down to a change of mind, And to leave the stigmas and hate behind. Does it really make them feel good deep within, To hate another person based on the color of their skin? It's not what's on the outside that makes them who they are, It's what's inside them; It's what's in their heart. It doesn't matter what we look like externally, The only thing that matters is who we chose to be. We are strong, and have the power to agree, To love and cherish each other's company. And I know that we can all hold each other up and live free. This is my ode to humanity.


Details | Free verse | |

keep us divided

if we hate each other because we have different colored skin
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because of our different origins
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because of our different creeds (or disbelief in any)
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because we want what they are selling, and there’s not enough to go around
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because our accents are different
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because we have different sexual preferences
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because of lifestyle choices (drugs, alcohol, etc.)
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because of our political beliefs
they will keep us divided
if we hate each other because we have different hopes & dreams
they will keep us divided.

for when we are divided we are weak & 
when we are weak they continue to grow stronger.


Details | Narrative | |

My Dearly Departed

In this world, I can see many faces of you and me,
Boundlessly free with our new abilities to breathe!
I am a dime per every one dozen collecting my fee.

You see, it is just you and me rising upon this day.
Together we do be and forever on our merriest way.
It is just another day for you and me to pitch a say.

We are one word away you see my dearly departed,
We can all bail ship or get this whole thing restarted.
Or, we can confirm that which became our imparted.

Love me now and hate me later,
Or, love me later and hate me now.
Either or my dearly departed hater,
I impart onto you my Poof Bam Pow!

® Registered: Ann Rich 2009


Details | I do not know? | |

Forever turning leaf

My parents are yelling, to and fro,
All I do is sit here and wait, for the next scream and shout
My world has torn apart, MY home, MY world
I don’t want any sympathy, cause then I would cry
So many tears, to think so many families go through this fate
I hate this cruel, bitter, twisted world, I hate bitter life
The only reason why I keep going is for my mother
The heart-broken woman, cries for her life back
My father storming out, denying any hate

All I have now is my music, my sweet lulling music
If only I could live and dream my music
The sweet pluck of a guitar and the soothing voice
It understands what I go through, the pain and the agony
I look at baby photos, and even though I remember the every day arguments
I look oblivious and see it as the every day life
Every part of my home will go, the house, lifestyle, the shouting,
The address, to my bedroom I will have to say goodbye
Imagine walking into your house after a normal school day
And walking out knowing your life will never be the same again

Never seeing your bedroom again, never sitting on your sofa again, 
Never walking along your road to the near by shops
Knowing that you can never return
Knowing that your life is not in your hands anymore
I hate the world, I cannot get who I love, lead the life I want
And never see my life again


Details | I do not know? | |

Suicide

I wake up in the morning feeling sorrow clear as day
My family sees me moping but don’t know what to say
I walk around the house, waiting for a hint
But nothing came around, I’m looking for my end 

My friends don’t like me, although they do smile in my face
But as soon as I’m gone, they take back everything they say
They hate who I am, they hate where I come from
I hate being treated like I’m someone on the run

 My mom is crazy, well that’s what everyone says
They look and me and think, “oh, she’s as good as dead”
I want to prove them wrong, I want to show them different
But what if they’re right, and I’m just being a hypocrite

I stare at the sky, as if in a daze
But my family tells me that what I’m going through is just a faze
I want to believe them, I really do
But at this moment I just want it to be through 

I woke up one day and decided to end it all
I knew that all I had to do was take a really big fall
So I went outside and looked for some high places
But I couldn’t find a place that was good to my tastes

I then decided I wanted to die from my favorite place
So I climbed on the roof of my house and stood as straight as a lace
I looked at the sky and all I saw was blue
Standing there, I finally realized the truth

My life was in my hands and I could make it better
I knew no one could make me unhappy, not even locking me in a cellar
The sun was shining bright as I decided to go back down
I turned to go down the ladder without one trace of a frown

I took one step and then my foot slipped
As I fell I kept my hand, on my hip
My parents found my body, as they returned home 
They knew it would happen, everyone said my life was written in stone

As my funeral came and the days passed on by
Everyone thought that I had committed…
Suicide 















Details | Rhyme | |

Candy Medicine

I abuse the power of these pills
the ones the doctor gave,
the numbness it brings
making me their robotic slave,
I feel it overtake my system
cold snow, blank static fuzz, numb
that's it yes, here I am?
I'm the someone who is no one.
Tell me, tell me, pray tell me,
don't you hate to feel
I hate the way it is,
no it doesn't seem real.
So I take the pills the doctor gave
because I can't stand the pain
I don't like the sunshine
when I'm cold as rain
so tonight I'll take them
1,2,10, just right
then I'll be frozen forever
I don't want to feel tonight.


Details | ABC | |

Confusion

The great love that I express for you is,
fake and I find my hate for you, growing
daily the more I see you, the more I hate
you I can tell you that I never, intend to
love you, our past conversations has really
bored me and have not impressed me to
the highest standard of your character, your
attitude really makes me sick and, if you
and I were to get married I'd expect 
nothing but hate and never to experience,
love and pleasure so I hope you avoid me
and don't trouble yourself to respond to 
this poem because I don't want you to
show your love and sweetness and believe
me, I'm afraid that I can't be yours
for the rest of my life.


Details | Free verse | |

Societies problems

The charade of porn
hostages of the blackmarket
never see them around
double d's head in the toilet
not sure if they too have been claimed a victom
or if we will ever see that pretty face again

Tricks and deception used against people of different races
i hate you because you hate me
this is the way i was brought up to justify me
sorry for you to be wrong
i don't hate on purpose
but the propoganda on the tv
dubbed over voices saying things in different languages
i have no choice left but to believe

Arms race of the planet
gotta protect myself and my loved ones at all costs
more guns, more bombs
and the proof i know how to use them
to perpetrate a never ending cycle of premature
suicidal satanic slaughters

Religious points of view
blind you more than you can see
chances it was altered years ago
and is now a deceptive weapon
to corner our minds to believe what we believe
and fight for those beliefs
no matter how wrong we be
too confusing to think about this problem
sending our predecessors from drinking milkshakes
to packing a nine

Psychological abuse of imperfect people
mistakes made, may not be a mistake because someone else says so
tearing down angry men, instead of providing them with the tools they need
to be a functioning member of society

Money is more important than anything
and what we cant buy we will steal
wrap everything in a pretty package to protect the dream that might be there
when the nightmare is so real
and we escape the rapture of this knowledge
to afraid of how humbling it could be

Health concerns of what we consume
and the rules always changing of what we can and cannot eat
the ignorance of those healing us villified
if they dont have the answers we need

The game of life revolves around taking another life away
instead of the reality the whole thing is an elaborate test to save another life
if your life is not a joke why is mine?
reaching out on the internet telling a story with too much information
they might have witnessed a rape from a distance even though she was screaming
but this is a whole planet witnessing my trainwreck
doing nothing

Points and rewards of honour only come out of winning a war
and doing terrible things
when maybe it's easier to get your medal
by caring for someone tied to the tracks
and winning over that part of the war

Helpless or not

something needs to be done
when pieced together depending what you have done
the reward maybe for you


Details | I do not know? | |

The Struggle

The struggle within
Everyday I fight with self 
Everyday I hate something I have or have not done yet
Mad at the mistakes I have made
Yet becoming a woman by my mistakes
Mad at the world
Walking with out guidance
Becoming a lover of what has no true meaning
Learning to please me
Learning to live for what is meaningful to me
Learning to condition my mind and heart to work together
Playing the game of life to win without actually playing
Stepping away from what I despise
Not conforming to imperfect man’s ridiculous rules
Putting priorities in order 
My existence is to set the record straight
Love it, like it or leave it 
I am the listening ear with no one to listen to me
I am here on my own 
Taking my own advice
The realization is that most people have no clue
No clue of what to do with them selves other than work
We work to get by, to buy things that do not matter,
To impress people who hate what is within
We all walk around constantly insecure
Insecure that someone wants something we have
What is that we have?
Nothing
Everything that we have is in our mind, heart and soul
For many including me lose our mind, heart or soul
All for nothing, for something that has no true baring in life
Who will love simplicity?
Who will feel and love what is within?
Who will bring back meaning to the world of lost souls?
Who?


Details | Free verse | |

Love me, Hate me (My Secret Sin)

Lovely as I love you
Shove me, but it’s as lovely as I love you
Lovely, hug me, shove me
But it’s as lovely as I love you
If I hate me, would you still hate me?
What if no longer from my image you could rate me
I just want you to hate me
That way when we bicker and fight 
At the end of the night, you may still be my wife
Climax is more depressing than Miramax
Send my hate this rose, send my love this fax
For life is based on facts
Murderers with a lovely axe
It’s true, it’s true, tomorrow it’s you
Just ask Peterson and OJ
It doesn’t really matter what some say
And some day in that forbidden casket I’ll lay
Beautiful is you
Next to your cuticles, what do I do?
Matter is everything
But for some reason matter is so much sadder
The tears after the laughter
This is my love poem, my passion
Maybe this time you will kick me above the groin
Why is our pastime something we mourn?
A sacred Identity is born
Tears of shame, responsibly worn
Maybe after tonight we’ll make up 
And you’ll lay your head in my arms
And allow me to sooth you with my selfish charms
I love you, you hate me 
Tomorrow I’ll hate you and you’ll love me


Details | I do not know? | |

Failure

My life is failure 
I can’t deny it anymore
I hate my mom
I hate my dad
I hate my friends
I hate my enemies
And I hate myself
It’s not worth 
This life I lead
Pain and suffering
Filled with greed
Bottles of blood
Precious razor blades
Self help
And support groups
I’m going to hell
I don’t care anymore
I forgot what I’m looking for
My life is filled with
Pills, lighters,
Never forget 
The razors
The pain inside
Is almost unbearable
Another day
Another pill
Another night
Another thrill
Will I survive
Or will I kill
Blood gushing
Heart pounding
How long?
This is my failure


Details | Free verse | |

Lost

Lost in this world
Don't know which way to go
Need to escape
Need to find my way out
How did I get into this mess
How can i get out
I hate the pain
I hate the strain
To be something I'm not
I hate not having what I need 
I hate it when I bleed 
I hate the fears
I hate the tears
I know I'm worth more
But sometimes I'm not sure
What can I do to help my self
Where can I go to hide
I feel like I've died a thousand times
and brought back to this dreadful world
Why the pain
Why the strain
Why be someone I'm not 
Why do I care
Why do I hurt
The pain hurts 
The tears flow
The fears still remain


Details | Dramatic monologue | |

New Diet

Lose weight fast with the new Anger and Hate diet!

Anger helps you shed those unwanted pounds
and hate helps you keep them off.
Learn how to convert that anger into long lasting hate.
You'll never want to eat again!

Call now! Operators are standing by.


Details | I do not know? | |

Tears

Blood falls instead of tears,
I don't have many fears,
Only me,
And whatI see,
I see people die,
I see myself cry.

I want to kill,
And I will,
I want to smile,
I've waited along while,
I guess I'm depressed.

I hate your life,
I want to end it with a knife,
I can't be stopped,
My hate can't be dropped.

I want to find my way,
I want to say,
I've changed,
And that my life has rearranged.


Details | Free verse | |

Hate Speach

Propoganda corners your mind
look at me squeaky clean
look at them
one at a time
allow me to concentrate your focus
then allow you to think for yourself
you will come
to your own
conclusion
turn around and shake my hand
now we agree and understand
dont agree
let me put it in terms you understand

the world has yet to prove to me
im not locked in a box in my own little corner
no one notices me
no matter what i do
so ostrocise you
march of the pigs
focuslesness of soo many forms
the laws of god
meant to govern you
but alas
what has god done for you
pause fo a moment to let you see
the only end conclusion to the matter at hand
is what we agree upon
the difference is there
for the sucbconcious math
for us to come together and see

there is no one out there
there is no other world
just an illusion
there is no china
therew is no india
just like the moon landing
propoganda and hate speach
put to death for knowing the truth
pine through their lies
figure out what they are up to
doesnt matter to you
cant interact with a world built around ignoring me
feed me lies to make me think
by cornering my mind
blinding me
eye by eye
isnt that what im supposed to think

where did i go to 
disappeared inside with my head in my hands
wishing all my friends were dead
gods rules were never meant to help us
we just govern ourselves with them
when the next blodd bath hits
i wouldnt be caught dead
in a uniform
or burried beside one
all your hate speach

and you wonder why i cant wait to die
for my own selfish cause
like selflessness has no pay off
wheres my bribe
born into this
sold to the gypsies
900 employeesd cant even pull it off
too late back to square one of your blame game
hate speach
see if i take the bait
all your practice of the front pages
all the fashion of the celebrities ive learned to despise
so pretty to make me feel 
like im nothing
nothing at all
as your laws treat me as a number
and im not important at all
build my life so you can rip it apart
with everything you do
then justify it with your hate speach

wonder why my names are songs
and happy birthday
the cuts on my arms never did you any harm till you join along
never mind the sad eyes looking away till you cant stand to disagree
then killing me is easy
a life long game of kiss but dont tell
till i do it to myself
so so suicide

aggrevated subconcious agrrevations


Details | Free verse | |

i love you sometimes

the love comes
and the hate grows
love tries
hate has a hat on its head
love shows
hate makes an appearance
love slips by
hate says a loud statement
love let's it go

... all i know is i love you

all i know is ...

I LOVE YOU

sometimes

and my hate is trivialized...

kiss me 
kiss me 
conk me ...

your  love for me is=
now
you knew it all
along-

you knew it all 
along-

the love
this never leaves

hah!

try, but here i am!

give way and  you know!
i love you!


Details | ABC | |

die

dont wanna hear it dont wanna care like my life matters if you aren't there im  sick 
so sick of your lies so just leave me out of it.i see nothing about you i love any 
more my love for you left along time ago.im sick of her and sick of you so just 
leave me out of it.no matter what i tryed to do like you would ever care.i tryed to 
love you but  my love is gone i used every bit left to trust you yet you lied me you 
hid from me did you really ever love me are was that a lie to.i dont care any more 
for what you have to say.this is the day i wish to die alone it wouldn't matter  you 
never loved me i can see that you hate who i am like i hate what you become.you 
mad me hate herjust get a life.todays the day i die.i dont wanna hear you lies like 
you matter any more. i rather die then hear from you so just get a life your no 
better then  a kid stop acting like your  three and just get away from me.todays the 
day i wish to die,alone is the cold just leave  me alone.


Details | I do not know? | |

Laugh and Cry

Standing behind this plate glass
Staring out at you and wondering
How do you do the silly things you do
Yet you still break through and break me down.
And make me frown.

I have no reason to cry except
for all the lies now you 
sit and laugh while i cry,
You really cared as if i wasn't
there.You told me you loved me
just to see me cry when it
turned out to be a lie.

I hate it when you look at
me as if I'm not there.
I hate it when you play with her 
pretty hair. I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you laugh when i cry.
Most of all I hate that i love you.
And everything else too. Because 
if not for you then who would
make me laugh and cry!


Details | I do not know? | |

Promises

Promises
I hate promises
Because promises are said but never done,
Promises are things people say that they are sure to do but never do!
Promises to me are just things
people say to get you off their back!
I hate promises because promises
has been broken so many times
that I just can't stand to get my hopes
up high just to be broken to pieces.


Details | Rhyme | |

Mornings

I hate mornings, yes I do!
I hate mornings, don't you too?
Tripping across the ice cold floor;
Stumbling 'till I reach the door.
Then step into a nice warm shower;
Gee wish I could spend an hour.
Dry my hair and comb it too.
Boy wish I could find that shoe.
Grab a bite, then it's out the door.
BRRRRR, this is words than that icy floor.
It's off to work in a great big hurry;
Trying to ignore the immense snow flurry.
I hate mornings, don't you too?
There is too much hustle and bustle to do.
I hate mornings, and this is true!
I hate mornings, Yes I do!


Details | Rhyme | |

Something Missing

We started talking on the phone for hours,
It was so amazing that after all this time we even talked at all,
You or me would always just call.

Lately it seems like the interest isn't there anymore,
It kind of  feels like your trying to kick me out the door,
Some of the recent things you have said,
Have finally caught up in my head.

Maybe it just wasn't meant to be,
I think you will also agree,
To a certain degree.

That's the way life is,
And I'm going to just have to deal with your decision,
Maybe one day you will have a different vision.

But I can't stick around and wait for the "future",
And lay in bed just thinking about you all the time,
That would be like charging myself with a crime.

When we used to talk it was amazing how we clicked,
But lately it has seemed like we always get into a conflict,
And I'm not blaming you for the way things have been going,
I guess heartache is just a part of growing.

I hope one day we can talk again,
But right now this is just hurting my heart and my brain,
I wish there was a easier way to explain,
But there is nothing easy about all the pain that I've been having to sustain.

Please don't hate me after all this,
Hopefully you will understand that you will be missed,
Nobody that ever met you could ever forget you,
Because your one of a kind from my point of view.

Now you probably hate me,
And I don't blame you,
I just hope you understand,
And you wont put our friendship in remand.


Details | I do not know? | |

Living on bed terms

I can't sleep because of you 
your on the couch rebelling
against my rules 
we can't stand each other
at this point and I'm fighting
the choice to choose
what I really want 
because I don't know want I want

I thought I loved you
So why does it hurt?
I don't want to want you
But I can't seem to close my eyes 
without your body next to mines
I hate that you won't compromise
Your tired of all my wining

I feel like pulling my hair out 
lord is this a sign? Why doesn't he care 
that I'm crying? I hate this feeling of living 
on bad terms. We used to be on the same
team but now were on different
turfs. 

I wish I could could reach my
sanity right now because maybe
than I could find who I use to love. 
But he doesn't seem to exist anymore.
Is love really like this is it all meant to fall apart?


Details | Rhyme | |

Hate

I hate the way you talk to me
I hate the way that you lie
I hate it when you make me laugh
I hate it when you make me cry

I hate to be anywhere near to you 
And I hate it when you’re gone
I hate the way you make me blue
And I hate that I’m your pawn

I hate the way you read my mind
I hate your brand new hair
I hate that you make me blind
I hate that I even care

I hate that you never said goodbye
I hate to hear your voice
I hate it that you will still deny
I hate that I had no choice

I hate the memories in my head
I hate you through and through
I hate myself even more 
Because I can never hate you


Details | I do not know? | |

My Life

What's my life like
It’s good but it's bad
Sometimes I am happy
But lots of times I'm sad
I do a lot of good things when I want
But sometimes I get mad so I don't
I like my friends but sometimes I feel
They need to get away
Because I don’t always have time
Time to play
I like my life
I like the things that
Make me happy and glad
But I hate my life
I hate the things that make
Me mad sad and
Want to cry so that's why
To my life I sometimes say goodbye
 


Details | I do not know? | |

the letter i cannot write

In your arms you held me
With comfort and love to spare
Yet you left me early
To leave me in a heap and die

You are the rain I suffer with
Yet you make my harvest bloom

You are the volcano that tears through the mountains
Yet gives hope to a new start in life
My heart pours open for you 
Like a 9000 foot dam
Crashing to the floor
Yet you cannot hear my silent echoes of pain
When you escape from my hold

You flood my world like the devils tsunami
Yet you make my river, valleys and sea

You are my poison leaking into my veins
To kill my heart, spirit and my soul
Yet you are the one who gives me drains, to escape the flood

You’re the letter I cannot write
And the heart I must keep well locked up

I hate the feeling of love and pain
Like the dagger you placed in my heart

You’re in my mind, wherever you are
I can love and hate the same
Because I hate you for making me in love
It would not be so bad if you were a distant
Yet somehow you are always here

You held me in your arms
And clasped me by the throat
I was in pain, yet could not seem to leave
You are the one who I love most
And could not leave until I must give in

I thought it was for the best
Yet I suffered yet more pain
Now I think back
I would do anything
For one last clasp again

I cling to you and you to me
Like at that party in his chair
I hugged you and you hugged me
And I long for that moment ever spare

I told you stuff, I never could tell
Only you would understand
Then you left me and I knew
I would never have that hug again

You leave me lonely, cold and shivering
In the rain and in the snow
I will never forgive you, for leaving me like that
Yet, I cannot say goodbye
As you have a clutch onto my heart
And you leave lonely in that chair
I miss you and write a letter of falsehood
I mean what I say but it’s not the truth
You are the letter I cannot write

I wish I could, but if you knew
The feelings, how I felt
That you are the one I love
Then you would never understand me ever again the same


Details | I do not know? | |

Failure Ends

Thoughts seek to be but fail to be random
Mind seeks to be clear but fails to be free
Heart seeks to be nurtured but fails to be loved
Feelings seek to dealt but fail to be returned
Souls seek company but fail to be joined
Bodies seek to meet but fail to be one
Vision seeks to be clear but fails to be unclouded
Then I met you and life seems to be perfect…

I have failed so many times
I have made my heart commit so many crimes
I don’t deserve your love
I don’t deserve to be called her dove
Broken so many hearts
Begged my ghosts to stop 
Yet they prowl around and start
Devise new schemes to deceive and hurt

My mind that perpetual flirt
New victims everyday
Adaptations every way
I’ll fail to be free so I will hurt them anyway
I hate myself so I’ll make everyone hate me too
Nobody’s worth me till I met you

Not an arrogant statement 
But a realization that fate sent
Perfection in a 5’2 bundle
I don’t trip over myself
I don’t fall or stumble


Details | I do not know? | |

Hate The World

You gotta hate the world at times
Cause sometimes it makes you cry

You gotta have the perfection of it's people
When your life aint nothing but lies and goodbyes

You gotta have a world in your head
So you don't feel like your dead

You gotta hope even when theres none
And dream, dreams to help you feel relieve

You gotta understand the world is cold
And it grows colder as you grow older

You gotta hate the world at times 
Cause sometimes it can make you cry


Details | I do not know? | |

Running Still

Let the purified water fill my soul with his truthful ways,
And the cravings of starvation show me the way to my truth.

That the very breath I take could be my last,
So let me not devour it but to cherish the life I hold in my hands. 

In him I find my peace and the will learn to make gone of my miserable anger.
My wrongness in the world will be changed to the knowledge I hold dear.

Knowing I am never alone in the darkest of the deadest hour,
Nor in the pits of the hottest sands where there is no water but empty dryness to 
be found.

For when we walk as the blind ones do and as we talk such as those who have 
no tongue,
Let us not walk in the evil paths and let us not bower of speeches we do not 
believe in.

For when we are stabbed with such a blade of hate do not wound it up and hide it,
But to let the blood flow out and heal if it has no regrets to shed upon.

Have our passion on friendships be passed to our corrupted enemies 
For we may see the night of Judgment will be lost and forgotten and all will hate 
no more.

Fight not toward the flesh of your own bones
nor the beating of our bleeding pains.   
   


Details | Free verse | |

For You All (My Secret Sin)

For those of you whom say 
I have to much hate in this heart
I don’t hate you with this guilty fever
But I don’t love you either
I don’t hate you with this guilty fever 
But I don’t love you either
And yet they tell me things change 
But when you look back on it  
It all seems strange
Promised to return as one to the manger
Tiptoeing over cement splits
Trying to avoid danger
Reality just dealt you a stiff blow 
When evil is near 
Christians feel a drift in flow
This is the humor in life 
Without stress being detrimental
There’s a little hate in the center of all of us
Being semi-sentimental
My life is portrayed on a conspicuous display
Go ahead and kiss if you may
Shooting for heaven
No way we can miss if we pray
Then again I’m likely to on this day
I was as peaceful and innocent as an old man
Stroking his beard 
Just as his time neared


Details | Lyric | |

Hate her

Hate her 
Hate her> (whisper)

School starts everyday
She keeps passing by me
Shoot her

I don’t know what to do 
She’s my worst enemy
Hate her

Chorus:
             Hate her
             She’s my worst enemy 
             Hate her
             She keeps bugging me every time
             Hate her
             She’s makes me feel sad

She keeps telling me everything
She seems soo friendly
Love her

I don’t know what she in mind
But I guess its something really mean
Hate her

Chorus:
            Hate her
            She’s my worst enemy 
            Hate her
            She keeps bugging me every time
            Hate her
            She’s makes me feel sad

The week keeps passing by
She’s been nice to me all week long
Hug her

I think she’s really changed
That’s a good sign
Like her


Chorus:
            Hate her
            She’s my worst enemy 
            Hate her
            She keeps bugging me every time
            Hate her
            She’s makes me feel sad

I don’t know it seems I can’t trust
She was my best friend but not anymore
Try hard
Oooooooooh

 Chorus:
            Hate her
            She’s my worst enemy 
            Hate her
            She keeps bugging me every time
            Hate her
            She’s makes me feel sad

Chorus:
            Hate her
            She’s my worst enemy 
            Hate her
            She keeps bugging me every time
            Hate her
            She’s makes me feel sad

Chorus:
            Hate her
            She’s my worst enemy 
            Hate her
            She keeps bugging me every time
            Hate her
            She’s makes me feel sad
            I just can stopppp 


Details | Bio | |

As I Look into his eyes

 As I look into his eyes he's wondering what do I see I see pain and wondrous love and 
as I sit an look deeper into his eyes I see a soul so black that it can't be loved so I 
ask why be this way why be so full of hate a hate to strong that it has you so bound 
down boy you don't even have faith so as I sit an look into his eyes what do I see I see 
a man to proud to pray to a sham to have faith I see a man lost in himself lost in his 
pain wondering where he went wrong saying why did I have to be this way all they every 
wont was for me to have faith but all I every had was hate


Details | Sonnet | |

I Hate You

Is it a sin to say I hate you?
Even if this is how I feel?
Lack of remorse and empathy
Your reactions simply unreal

I was raised never to say this
With morals and values emplaced
But I cannot help to feel this
My life with you is such a total waste

I hate you more than anything
This feeling I cannot hide
You see it when I look at you
So foolish, tossing it to the side

I was raised to be better than this
And never to say hurtful things
A sin to me would be hiding
The hate inside and what it brings

So yes I definitely hate you
Everything little thing you portray
I hope you have a good back up plan
This trial is over, my life begins today

© Stacy Lynn Stiles


Details | I do not know? | |

I hate being Sober

I hate being sober 
I can’t wait for this day to be over

So I can be high
So my body will feel like I can fly
So I can be with my friends
And enjoy this life that to us will never end

I hate being sober 
I can’t wait for this day to be over

So my body can feel numb
So I wont be under the gun
And all I will be able to think about is having fun

I hate being sober 
I can’t wait for this day to be over

So I can go to tons of parties with my friends
And drink gallons of Bacardi until the night finally comes to an end
And It’s morning again

 I hate being sober 
I can’t wait for this day to be over


Details | Free verse | |

This Poem is for You

I am writing this poem for you, but
I don’t know you.
I don’t know what you hate or 
love, -white, red, black, blue
up, down, sideways –I just don’t know!
So, I will pick a broad subject
People, yes -maybe even you! You, you, you! 
I will write this poem for you and about you!
“You,” you are a person? Right!
There are billions of people on this planet,
tall ones, short, old, young,
fat ones, skinny ones,
some in good health some ill.
Some will die while I write this and
while you read it some will be born.
We are all the same, people are people but
we don’t think alike, look alike, or talk alike.
Some of us love each other, others hate everyone;
most do both unequally –we choose what we think,
and we think differently. 
You are smart, you can read
(many can’t,) and you are reading my poem
that is interesting to me.
It shows you have great taste.
You are perfect, smart, good taste, interesting
and I bet you are even sexy.    
I bet “You” are too large a subject 
for one poem, too complicated, too complex,

so, I will write about my cat instead, 
a car ran him over yesterday
he is dead; and I have
a half can of cat food in a plastic bag
in my fridge,
useless and taking-up space.


Details | I do not know? | |

Cruel Tricks

I love you because your wonderful, but I hate you for loving me too
I love you because you ask for nothing, but I hate you because you weren’t true
I love you because I’ve invested years of my life with you, but I hate you because now I feel stuck
I love you because you make me feel complete, but I hate you because of your bad luck
I love you because you’ve taught me about unconditional love, but I hate you because you’ve taken advantage of my heart
I love you because you make me feel sexy, but I hate you because of the tricks you’ve played from the start
I love you because I gave body, spirit, and soul, but I hate you because for some reason you can’t give me the same
I love you because of your greatness and the sparkle in your eye, but I hate you because for you this is simply just a game


Details | Free verse | |

Lying Down

I’d hate to lie down
I’d hate to lie
Again
Like I did once before
Like I should have never done
Shouldn’t have
Regret
Haunting my mind
Lie down like a corpse
Giving up
Giving up all hope
All fate, all destiny
Never escaping
This life
This death
I’d hate to lie down my life, 
Like a corpse, motionless,
Waiting for the mortician
To take me
Make me, pretty
Prepare me for the end
I’d scream and thrash and tell them
I’m not dead yet
Keep me here
Keep me here, for a while longer
My soul is crippled but not dead,
Not dead,
Never dead,
Hope comes with faith
Faith comes from my heart
My heart still beats
Thumping,
Thump,
Thump.


Details | Free verse | |

Who or What is It


I don’t know who you are but I think I hate you for this;
I’ve spent my whole life asking why;
Why does it have to be like this?
I think it might be you; but why.
     I mean I know it’s your nature;
     You apparently chose to mess with the power that is;
     But why do you have to be here where we’re all at?
     I think we’ve been paying since the beginning of time.
I hate you for it;
I hate the whole idea;
How is this fair?
Life isn’t fair; that must be it.
     Religion says strive to be fair;
     Society tells us work on being fair;
     Meanwhile it is advised I keep my enemy close;
     It’s not only unfair but it’s not nice.
Ah speaking of nice;
From what I can tell;
The one thing I know about nice is;
Nice is having a bowel movement
     I guess I’m to ask for forgiveness;
     But forgive me if life has a constipating effect
     And oh that smell; the smell of it surrounds you;
     Oh did I make a boo-boo no that is a boo boo.
I was a pacifist once; a long time ago;
Everybody picked on me; everywhere I went;
It was embarrassing not to stand up for myself;
So what; I’m not supposed to be angry now and want to fight?
     Ok I’m not supposed to hate;
     But it’s real hard to be happy;
    And if I had any chance at all;
     I’d call your punk ass out.


  


Details | I do not know? | |

The True Enemies




I am anger
I am pain
I am hate

This is all i can be
For this is all that has been given to me.

For anger has been my lover
For pain has been my consoler
For hate has been my protector

Love, Peace, and Trust are my true enemies

For love is foolish
For peace is fleeting
And trust is betrayed

As anger, hate and pain is all
That is left once my enemies have gone.

For with a white flag they enter
Into your heart
But only leave anger, hate and pain 
In it’s path.

That is why
 
I am anger
I am pain
I am hate

Jm07/21/2006


Details | I do not know? | |

Last Sin

Dear God

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have hate and anger inside of me

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have cheated and lied

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have learned to hate and to be cold

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have disappointed my dear parents

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have made regrets that I’ll never forget

Forgive me God for I have sinned
I have twisted thoughts in my mind

Forgive me God for I have sinned
For this be my last sin I shall ever make

Amen


Details | Free verse | |

Fenced in....

If we have a poor perception of self
wouldn't we also....
have a poor projection of self
would it stand too reason...
poorly combined
would lead us to self deception
while we decieve others into
believing something we don't believe
our negative self.....

If we hate ourself
we'll naturally hate others
even if we try to fake it...
if we're insecure with ourself
we search for security from others
but,wouldn't insecurity fester like cancer?

It's all been said before,
the blind leading the blind
misery loves company
but....
when do we find it within' ourselves
to rise above our vulgar behaviors
and recognize that our warring
stems from our own sense of insecurity
......it only gets worse,before it gets better


Details | I do not know? | |

People Aren't Always Who You Think They are

People take advantage,
Of every little thing you've got,
Money, kidness, or just fukin' caring,
And they always think they get away without getting caught.

I know what their thinking,
The different ways inside your head,
You can't ever give me,
'Cuz they won't give a fuk when your dead.

They think everything's the same,
That nothing has changed,
This is the only time I'll help them out,
Only 'cuz they really need the help,
The stupid crazy crap they've done,
They think you'll always be there to the rescue,
But this time the war they haven't won.

I hate being so nice,
When people are in trouble,
I'm always willing to help,
You put a side you problems and differences,
To just get through the situation,
So no one gets hurt,
So I'm pretty much being nice to people,
Who caused me a bunch of stupid drama.

Things always have a price,
A meaning to every reason behind a theory,
I will always help out,
A person in trouble or in need,
The two reasons to all the stupid drama,
I'm about to feed.

I fukin' hate people judging me,
'Cuz look at the crap I do,
I'm not a b-itch if you take the chance to get to know me,
You'll notice my kindness will always last,
So let go of all the stupid crap,
And put everything in the past,
Where it should be.

No more assumptions,
Or judging me by looks or rumors,
'Cuz it's fukin' stupid your reasons,
I mean Fuk I have nothing against no one,
I hate no one no matter what the fuk you do,
Talk all the crap you want about me,
But in the end,
I'm not a bad person,
And you will find that out and soon see!
                                     November 20th,2005


Details | I do not know? | |

LOST BOY

Lost in a haze of drunken hate 
Who knew it would make me contemplate?
Woke up in a white walled cage 
A half naked body decorated with wounds of frustrated rage 

Did not remember what I did that night 
So damn bitter sweet I came out all right 
Pain dripped from the cuts that bled 
But it kills me from the tears they shed 

Mutilated emotions and burnt words clot the cut ends 
Granted is what I took in exchange for my friends 
A state of no escape because all the bridges are black and chard 
I can not escape myself so freedom is something I just disregard 

It looks as if I am all alone again 
Burned another bridge and lost another friend 
Counted to much and held her to high 
Pushed to much thinking she could fly  

My friend fell down and I left her behind 
Denied I cared at all just to get her off my mind 
So now I am lost in a personal world of hate and rage 
A man walks freely but his mind is a locked cage


Details | I do not know? | |

Always Be High

Love is so hurtful
Men are so cruel
Life is so hard
When you have no boy to cling to
Friends are so dumb 
No friend is a good one
I hate to lie
Hate to be mean
Always wanna die 
but thats just me
Hate to be broke
but that's my fate
it aint no joke 
I hate to hate
Got only one drug 
and that's my love
It's a feeling so nice
To always be high


Details | Free verse | |

Tears, Precious Gems

I can’t explain why I felt what I felt, 
At that very moment in time.
What made my heart crackle, shatter, and break.
Why in that instant I felt utterly and completely consumed with sadness,
There is no logical reasoning for letting something so small, 
Hurt me in such a huge, and profound way.
I hate you for making me feel that way,
I hate myself more for letting you make me feel that way.
Hate that I still can feel sadness because of you, 
As if you haven’t hurt me enough before, 
You still hurt me after, without even knowing it.
Without me even realizing it will hurt me.

Oh, what bliss I could feel if I could just let it stop hurting me,
If I could only shut that door in my heart, 
And leave it locked, throw away the key.
There is no reason for anyone to be in there,
No good reason the door should ever be unlocked.
If only my brain could do what is right for my heart and shut it out.
Take over the heart, make it stop feeling,
Make it stop double beating when there is excitement,
Make it stop bleeding with pain,
Agonizing pain, stop.
Stop now.

Give me strength to leave it behind, 
Give me strength to shut the door,
Give me strength to keep it locked.

A tear won’t be shed for you,
The only tears that shall fall from these broken tired eyes, 
Shall be the tears of happiness for someone deserving of those tears.
Someone grateful enough they would bottle them up and cherish them forever.
Like a precious gem.
My tears are precious gems.
Hard to get, 
Unforgettable,
And almost always deserving.

Not for you.
You are not deserving of my tears, 
Nor any part of my heart.


Details | Free verse | |

It's Over (My Secret Sin)

It’s over, It’s over
I hate it when it’s like this
But it’s over, It’s over
I hate it that it’s like this
But it’s over
My success is stress 
Whether I see forth fit 
My chance to exhibit a new exhibition
Pivoting a broken tradition
My pen and pad 
The only utensils to accompany me on this expedition
Put my life in words, day by day
Now in the verdict, you can feel my pain
Gave you tragedy after tragedy
Disaster after triumph, conceal my shame
I’m rushing this book, cause I’ve been sitting here
Coping and pasting material to paper
Scratching my head, when thoughts vanish like vapor
To withstand my span with writing
I put it together like thunder and lightning
Worrying faces, plea bargain hurrying cases 
Walking down Forsyth
Got me desperate for that life “Like”
Lost tears as they bury your peers
Another freeway accident
Times like those
We see our seat belts and attempt to fasten it
Shed the possibility
Of becoming dead by not accepting reality
I hate it when it’s like this
But it’s over, it’s over
I hate it when it’s like this 
But it’s over, it’s over


Details | Lyric | |

Stitched At The Rear

Everything, now everything, ain’t good enough for you
You hate me, you hate your life
You hate everything I do

You wonder why, the reason why
Why we don’t get along

You look in the mirror, it’s all too clear
You blame me for your life

Nothings good, good enough for you
You hate my girl, you hate my world
You hate the life I live

I know, I know it all too well
I ain’t perfect, I never will be…
But let me be me


Details | Free verse | |

The place within the fire part III

my world of tidal waves and sinking cities has not surprised me
of falling towers and other such horrors
its like ive accidentally seen them coming
and now I hate this world thinking I'm some sort of god
stuck in the middle of everything
inspiring mirrors of muses and masterpieces
and sometimes i wonder if god mad me bite off more than i could chew
but htat fire within
that crime i had to do
to save my life
i never meant to comit
i would be dead if i didn't 
and maybe your daughters too
and now word of mouth
two towns and sa city know about a crazy guy 
who went nuts in a big way
from some drug
but no one knows the whole truth
until this hits the streets and comes circling round
and the police will have to admit
i'm either more criminally minded than i care to realise
or it was all an accident
or that house was truly haunted

but i'm a tired soul
a lonely heart
and my pillow is swollen 
from tears of nightly torments of the radio
My story goes on
this legacy continues
and i care more for you than i let on
and i hate the world sometimes for the way it has happened to me
more than you will ever know

but i am strong
and i am weak
i find love and hold onto it
until they find a way to remove it from me 
or i poison myself another way
but i dont lie
and i dont hide
I'm not a murderer
I'm not arapist
I'm not a sex offender
just someone who lost their mind from drugs
just about got murdered heard some bad news and had to get away
and it haunts me everyday
it has haunted me for years
it has tormented me
and i know i am guilty
but i also saved more than just my life
and i think thats worth more than one room of your house
so i hope you keep that in mind

wehn I publicize 

the letters 

i have written to hitmen
who i know are out looking for a bounty
to stalk this miracle with a gun
my days are numbered again
and this phoenix needs to be reborn
but how many lives and chances do i have?

the place from the fire within 
was the beginning of an wscape and a new chapter of my getaway
and a new grape of wrath
and an endless book of self rejection and emotional scars
that hopefully one day heals
for now work on you
i know nothing will be the same

but at least you have your sanity
and mine is questioned everyday!


Details | Blank verse | |

I Hate Saying I Love You

Wool snagged on a thicket, unravelled until 
the garment lost shape, 
became meaningless. 
Words trapped in a windpipe, rattle and spill, 
like blank ticker tape 
through cold emptiness. 

Films shown in theatres without any seats, 
flickered silvery snaps, 
nothing left to confess. 
Wars fought in seclusion, advances, retreats, 
some incidental mishaps 
of skirmish loneliness. 

Days spent in denial, slowly undone, 
each hour spent haunting 
imposed restlessness. 
Nights viral with craving the rise of the sun, 
hang limpid and daunting 
in darkest distress.

I hate feeling the impulse, the burning inside, 
to speak cold distractions, 
dissemble, digress. 
I hate saying I love you, my mouth open wide, 
so much louder my actions 
than words can express.


Details | Free verse | |

The Phantom

Well, phantom, you've got me again.
You had me so fooled.
I'd fall for that special someone, 
Then I'd just fall to pieces.
Do you love or hate me?
Because you seem to do both.
You hide behind a loving warmth
Then leave, never to be seen again.
Are you scared that I will find you?
To finally unmask my true love?
Or do you just love to deceive me,-
Just to watch me cry all night?
Where are you hiding?
So full of mystery you are..
You were first a great smile, 
Then shockingly beautiful eyes,
Then a mind of philosophy.
Always the romantic..
Always making me fall for you.
Are you a criminal?
Constantly stealing my heart.
Or, is all fair in love and mystery?
Are you my shadow, so dark and always there,
Or better yet, my reflection?
Do you fade in the loves you touch
Or do they still remember, still love me?
How did you know where I was all those times?
How could you possibly know 
When, what, and where I wanted?
Do you rest, then strike,
Or constantly find yourself staring 
At me, so full of love
As well as tears?
You leave me questioning
What to trust and believe,
But you tell me in random ways
To move on and grow 
In love and life.
Is it you, or are you them?
Are you the one with my
Long lost heart?
You did nothing wrong,
So why did you leave?
Unless I'm not good enough.
Are you insulted?
You would never let me say such a thing.
I was always beautiful,
Worthy, smart, and strong to you.
Are you there when I don't think so?
Don't let me fall.
Carry me until you love me not.
I see you.
You're there the happiest times,
You're there the worst times.
You always had a way
To bring me in from the cold,
Give me happiness and a new little home,
Then kick me back into the snow.
So,phantom, show your face.
Answer my questions.
Give me a kiss, or, if you'd rather,
Let me die,
Because I know
You're not cruel.
You're not horrid,
You're not evil.
I know I love you
Even when I hate you.
I know who you are.
You are a phantom
In love,
Of love.
You are love.


Details | Free verse | |

These types of poems

I hesitate as I write these types of poems
because dare I ever say he makes me weak
I might lose him before anyone gets to see 
I am used to being disappointed 
So I shutter when a man makes me 
feel such strong emotions 
the type that makes me write these types of poems

I'm taking a risk when I say I feel butterflies
and that when he's around I feel good inside 
It makes hiding the new glow on my skin extra hard
but I fear the next poem will be entitled " It didn't work out"
I have developed many poems off of love gone awry 
so many tears I wiped cause he told me lies
So I must admit I panic quite a bit
when I start writing these types of poems

When I start writing these types of poems
It usually mean I'm sprung
It usually means I'm in real deep
and even though I hate admitting it
I am falling all over again
he makes me feel so brand new
Like the next grade in elementary
or a new pair of shoes
and even though I hate writing
these types of poems 
I must be honest with myself
I still smile when I go back
and read them no matter 
how bad the outcome 
because during the time 
I was writing these poems 
I felt so good inside.
That's something that deserves
remembering. 


Details | I do not know? | |

What You Did

                       
                              As you did , as my memory, as a true person
                                you disparted us with your hate and envy
           and it caused me to scar but left you with nothing but a fading memory.
                              My scars may not show but when you see me 
                          you would know that they have  depend all because
                              of your unkindness and selfish ways and you
                      have caused so much pain that cannot be taken away.
                                  Me as a friend, and me as a person
                    should and has forgiven you for your hate though
                       we still be friends for ever and never depart 
                              spiritually as we have physically.

                     You know my love and you laugh but remember:
            
                Though love may part from one but stays with the other
                          that love grows in eternity for ever and ever.


Details | I do not know? | |

To You

A thought for you I share
My passion runs so thick
Be true to you and love yourself
It’s hate that makes you sick

Be kind and be accepting
Of all you come to know
Be an honest friend, 
And not your neighbor’s foe.

Judgement is a breeder
War and greed it makes
For love is the answer
This is all it takes

Listen to your voice
Trust you and those you meet
Allow yourself the freedom
It’s the hate that you must beat.

You don’t always need be right
See what other’s see
For this will bring you life and peace
Feelings honest and free
 
I hope this helps you find your way
A life you choose to live
I’m happy now I’ve written this
My purpose was to give   


Details | Rhyme | |

My life

What's my life like 
it's good but it's bad
sometimes I am happy but lots of times 
am sad
I do alot of good things when I want but 
sometimes I get mad so I don't
I like my friends but sometimes I feel 
they need to get away 
because I dont always have time
time to play
I like my life
I like the things that 
make me happy and glad 
but I hate my life I hate the things
that make me mad sad and want to cry
so that's why to my life
I sometimes say goodbye.


Details | Bio | |

Pages of life.

I'm so confused.. I have no idea what to do, what way to go, and when? I hate that feeling
when you see everything moving to fast, like all the bad stuff in your life is happening
to quick, and you wanna grab it so you can control it, but you cant!!!!!! Its like you
want to make sure everyone around you is happy even though your the one sitting in the
dark crying or even holding it all in so that no one knows! Some times when you see
something in your life going wrong, you tend to tell yourself every things going to be ok
when you know damn right its not and you want to hold on to that even when everyone around
you notices it and tells you what you don't what to hear! I'm tired of failure, I am tired
of hurting. I look back at my life and the things I've done and ask myself that maybe if i
would of done this than this wouldn't of happened or its like if you knew it would of
turned out this way you wish you would of never done that. But hey its how life is right!?
I have to really find out whats going on cause i don't what it to bit me in the ass.......
I have to keep telling myself that im not alone and there are a lot of other people out
there feeling the same way or even worse. i hate not know whats going to happen next cause
then im not prepared for what ever it is! Have you ever wanted something so much and then
in the end you cant have it or even you think your going to have it for a long period of
time and it stuck in you head like you carved in to a tree but really your mind and then
it cant happen and ever where were you go you see that tree and it hurts so much to see
that and know that it is not going to happen! One of the feelings i hate the most is
regret, that hurts the most! I even feel like im in a crowded room and no one notices me
and it just makes me drift away more and more to where your mind plays tricks on you.
Really this all makes you think who really cares about you or even if your friends really
are your true friends! well the pages of life have turned and its time to read on in the
story cause theres is no story if you really spend time in that one part of it cause
you'll never know what happens next if you don't go ahead............................


Details | I do not know? | |

Do You

Do you hate me are love me
But, I heard it through the
Grapevine..

But the wine is multiplying

We always sing at the end of
A rainbow,

But what about the middle of
The rainbow,

Where the tears dry and turn
The golden dust..

But do you love me are hate
Me,

Will you please pass me a Kleenex
To wipe the dust running down
My face..

Did you drink your fill of wine

I heard through the grapevine
While the wine was multiplying

You etched my soul with emptiness,

Are, did you bless my heart and soul?

Do you love me?

Do you hate me?

You know I did hear it through the
Grapevine..


Details | Bio | |

A Life of Mines Part 1

Some people say life is short,
life is full of it, I hate life,
I hate my life, I hate the world Im in,
I don't like what Im going through, 
and so on and so on.
Well some people just sit down and whine
and complain. Its not really worth it.
Some people are truly blessed that they
ain't just been through it all.
Well for me I go through it all everyday.
Well not everyday, but what my life be 
bringing to me. 

Have u ever felt the lust and the pain
Have your life ever felt 
as if it was unfold in hell?
Well all we do is complain.
But who are you to complain if 
you ain't mostly went through it all.
I been through the broken glass
I was forced to give up something
that was very important to me in life
The part of life that is the best thing 
that everyone is proud about
The part that you know for sure that you
are when you come into this world.
Well for me Im glad that God was with me
but through it all I found that 
I can trust no man
cause my only man is God.
A Life of Mines

This boy held me down
and try to take what was something
that was very important to me
I cried to myself for days
Wondering if this will ever be over
But one thing I know
It truly woke me
All his jealousy
I couldn't have certain friends
I couldn't do the things I wanted to do
It felt like I been locked up
locked up in his world
What he has done to me
It hasn't left my life yet
A Life of Mines
 
He is the one who says he loves me and mean it
He is not a liar or cheater.
He is my healer.
He raise me up when Im down
When Im up 
he continue to keep me that way
Unless I let other things get the best of me
Have you just let your hand just reach out
to the one you truly can depend on
No not really cause a friend is not a friend
A family is not always a friend
Betrayal in this world 
got it bad
Its sad how we reach out
and point fingers at each other
because what I see in this eye
Is something I hope you can relate to
A Life of Mines


Details | Free verse | |

Popular guys

   Why is it that I always fall for the popular guys? 
The ones that every girl desires, the one every guy respects.
The guy with so much talent and fa ness that he gets noticed for everything he does
The type that would be missed by plenty and mourned by many
Not a cocky bone in his body... just cool real smooth and confident
I hate that I always fall for these types cause nothings ever private
My best friends are all waiting in line to be with him
or to call him and get the scoop first it's irritating. 
Can't some info and some gestures just be for me? 
Sometimes I get tired of it always including everybody.
I always fall for the guy in the middle of the circle
The one surrounded by people
the one forever entertaining
Not easily Imitated 
Not easily copied
His style, his personality, his everything is unique and hard to find 
I hate falling for these types cause they disappoint me all the time
They have too much of an audience to just focus on my needs
I should be first. I am his girl friend if that counts for anything. 
It should but it doesn't. Not to a popular guy. 
Even if the attention isn't wanted it's still given and all I can do is stand by.
    Stand by while he puts up a front. Portraying emotions that hurt me and build him up.
Waiting to see if he'll ever need me... the way I need him.
        Waiting to see if it will ever only just be me and him.  


Details | Free verse | |

Hate me

    I can see it in your eyes the way you act and i'm not surprised. You don't like me 
i'm sorry but honestly i'm stronger. So give me all types of looks, say what you want to 
say... because at the end of the day I could get " him" and that's all I need to avenge 
my irritation. Close your eyes what do you see? A little jealousy if you ask me. Since 
when you Trying front like you down? Is it because he no longer hangs around? I find that 
funny, you claimed how in love he was with you. Where is he? Why isn't he with you? All 
types of hate and I don't have anything to say but " please". Look me in the eyes, I am 
not intimidated... can't do anything but hate and girl I ain't with it. Trying act and 
play a part, how many shades of fake can you be? Peeling at the seams bursting to be seen 
but I don't see you and I won't ever see you. Stay trying to change my mood with evil 
glances but I am forever happy so stop hating already. I will always be me, my heart will 
keep beating no matter how the outsides change. I am still the same person. Is it wrong 
that I want something better for me? That I want love and all of the above and that I 
want to feel wonderful. I just hope hate can turn into love and that eventually it will 
be mutual.


Details | Romanticism | |

Another Sleepless Night

Another sleepless night
spent thinking about you
Another night wasted wishing things could change
I hate the way I can’t forget,
the way things stay on my mind
I hate it that I loved you
a feeling you couldn’t give me in return
I hate it that you were perfect
and when I was with you I actually felt accepted
I’m laying here wide awake
haunted by memories of you
memories I can’t seem to shake
I’m laying here wide awake
haunted by your smile
Somberly remembering how you made life worthwhile


Details | I do not know? | |

Eyeless In Wonderland

You say you love the nightingale ,but not the way it sings
       you say you like the evening bell,but not the way it rings
you love to pick the roses ,but their smell just turns you off
      your pillow's stuffed with eiderdown,but you find it much too soft
you came to watch the sunset but the colors hurt your eyes
      you seek the owl at midnight,but you find him much too wise
you got yourself a cuckoo clock but hate the way it chimes
      you love me for my poetry but hate the way it rhymes
I love you for your wondros eyes , that always look at me
      I love you for your wondros eyes, but not the way they see.


Details | I do not know? | |

DON'T YOU HATE....

Don't You Wonder why people Hate 
Don't you wonder what's your fate
Isn't it annoying to sit around and wait 
For something to come on time not late

Don't You hate being misunderstood
I know you wish life was better than the hood

Don't you wish you knew who to trust
Someone that's around forever and can't rust

Sometimes you believe that times are hard cuz people and things just bombard
When something bad happens you feel scared
But someone always sends their best regards

Don't you hate that feeling of life being a joke?
You blame yourself because your never awake 
But you need to wake up before you begin to soak

Don't you hate loosing someone close
And cryin a puddle bigger than the east coast 
Well there's something you can do about all this hate 

STOP THINKING ABOUT THE PAST AND LOOK FORWARD FOR THE FUTURE


Details | I do not know? | |

My angel/ devil

    Your my angel, my everything. I would do anything to keep hold of your hand but it's slipping 
and I don't have enough energy to pull it back to me. You've protected me from everything, 
brought me into to a world of happiness and I want to say thank you. But you can also be a devil. 
Causing me pain just to show my strenghts. The tests are low blows to my heart and they make 
me regret ever having you around. Your my angel you hate me to love me and I love you to hate 
you. So lets do the opposite and just be friends again.


Details | I do not know? | |

Love and War

I hate how you've made me feel yet I love you still
I hate the fact that it's you I need to be able to heal
I hate knowing there is always a chance that you can walk away
And I hate that no matter what I want you to stay
My heart is sad to think that one day you will not be here
I sit here stuck, not knowing what to do, it's become a constant fear
Awhile ago I felt I had finally let you go
My body and mind quit fighting for you, I finally learned to say no
But it only takes one word from you to break that front apart
What exactly are you trying to do to my fragile heart?
I tried to turn away from you so I could live to be okay
That didn't do much good, I'm in the same predicament today
Once again my heart opens to you because it's you I truly love
You were the first to me make me realize what love can be
And though you did not tell me but twice, there is a part of you that loves me
I'm never sure exactly where we'll end up, or if this is all a dream
But I feel butterflies again, and my smile beginning to beam
One more time I'll tell you, I hate how you've made me feel
The fact remains though, it's you I love....still


Details | I do not know? | |

Love me, Hate me

Love me for who I am, hate me for who you would like me to be
Love me for the emotions I express, hate me for setting you free

Love me for giving my all, hate me for giving too much
Love me for the way we made love, hate me for making you feign my touch

Love me for the kisses and hugs, hate me for the affection I gave
Love me for my kindness, hate me for the lives I want to save

Love me for staying while I could, hate me for leaving too soon
Love me for the chaos I put in your life, hate me for I’ve changed your life’s tune


Details | Lyric | |

Fall '05

Digging through the trash I find inside myself,
discovering more and more things to hate.
I hate the way I give and give,
letting others use my generosity.
I hate the way I’m always too blind to see,
that so many are just using me.
I hate the way I let my friends go.
There is so much I wish I could let them know.
Like how much I love them,
how much they mean,
everything they’ve done for me.
I hate how I can never open up to others in reality,
but in this cyberworld, my mind and heart are on display.
I hate how when I finally try,
I stumble over myself,
growing even shyer.
I hate how when I say what I mean,
others don’t mean what they say.
I hate how I can’t change who I have become,
how the life in me just feels like letting go.
I hate how I see no hope,
how I see no love.
I hate how I find myself doubting an existence above.
I hate the way I keep just wasting away,
fretting over an inability to find a new love.
I hate that I feel.
I hate that I want to love and be loved.
I hate how I apologize for finally speaking my mind,
for finally standing up for myself.
I hate how I keep regressing into depression,
how I never seem to find a way out.
I hate how I hate myself,
and I hate how I am afraid it may never change.
I hate how I fear everything will be exactly the same.


Details | I do not know? | |

I AM

I am an independent believer looking at another side of blinded endeavor feeling the pain what we inflict on others and ourselves.

I wonder why people can be so filled with hate and mask themselves from the overwhelming emotions plaguing our world in suffrage yet claim themselves in good,
But profess themselves in Christianity.

I see the pain of the notions forgotten children reaching for heaven as god’s fair hand grasps their hearts and with his teary eyes cleanse them free of our own weaknesses we have not yet seen.

T want the peace, love, and forgiveness of what was promised to me in my mighty book that I have as my shield of armor against the evil I feel when I go against the adversaries of the world.

I am ostounded that we leave innocence to rout in caois and corruption with out a kind word or good deed for we are more into self than world harmony.

I pretend that I fly in my father’s kingdom where all the children are cuddled safe in his nurturing arms accepted faults and all. He holds his hand out to me and says some beliefs don’t always go unheard, but just untouched for my people cast the unwanted verbal truth from their ears for I hear you and accept you for I love my children.

I touch the tears of our future living amongst the sacrificial of what we see as governmental need but at what value is it when it mocks the oldest book we saver in a voice with mincing pleasures we still fail to see.

I worry for our soles degrade ourselves in worship as the pledge to a blood stained spangled banner instead of the one who gave his son in sacrificial salvation instead of making verbal pornography of his act indulging an abomination of religion at will as man poisons minds with new advances intriguing among us naming rule.

I cry as I stand with my beliefs bashing preyed on as if lying in a bed of knives Knowing I’m only one in await of amageden in the pestilents that the worlds deranged lovers desecrate.

I am what I am but we think a life for a life with judgments of our own prejudices superior to authority. What have we become but what we hate in thirst far worse.


Details | I do not know? | |

TO:HIM

I CAN'T SAY I'M A VIRGEN ANYMORE,BECAUSE HE TOOK IT AWAY. I COULDN'T 
SAY NO , BECAUSE I WANTED TO KNOW MORE. I DIDN'T WANT IT TO 
HAPPEN ,BUT HE SAID IT BE OKAY.HE MADE ME FEEL SECURE, AND 
THOUGHT HE NEVER LEAVE RIGHT AWAY.WELL I WAZ ONE BIG FOOL TO 
BELEIVE WHAT A GUY SAY, AND IT WASN'T HIS WORDS, CUZ EYEZ AND 
ACTIONS, JUST SIMPLY HAD MORE TO SAY.WELL SHE'S TOLD ME HIS LIE, 
SHE'S OPEN MY EYEZ. ALL I COULD DO WAZ LAY IN BED THREE NIGHTS AND 
CRY ANDCRY.I WANTED TO HATE HIM,CUZ HE'S PLAYED A GAME. I WANTED 
TO STAB HIM ,AND MAKE HIM FEEL THIS PAIN.HE LIED FROM THE VERY 
START , AND ONLY WANTED TO GET INTO MY TIGHT SPOT.HE TOOK MY 
VIRGINITY ALL WITHIN HIS LIES.BUT I DON'T HATE HIM , INFACT I GIVE HIM 
PROP'S. HE KNEW HIS GAME , HE KNEW JUST WHAT TO SAY.AND NEVER 
WOULD OF KNOWN,CUZ HE MADE ME FEEL IN A WAY.WOULDN'T HAVE 
GUESS HE USED ME FOR A BONE, UNTILTHAT MORNING SHE CALLED 
ME,AND NEVER HEARD FROM HIM AGAIN.


Details | I do not know? | |

choices

Sometimes I wonder what it takes,
To get to that special place,
If only love would get me there,
I’d live life without a care,
But that isn’t how it is,
You never know what you miss,
Until it’s way to late,
But by that time you learn to hate,
You hate yourself and you hate others,
You even learn to hate your brothers,
That is why people say,
There's so much wrong with today,
People forget what it’s like,
To teach a kid to be polite,
Everyone learns lessons untold,
So the bridge of fate unfolds,
You put to use what you learned,
Now see if you win or get burned,
Choices in life you have to choose,
Sometimes you win just to lose,
But the best advice that I can give,
Is you can lose and still win,
Only you can be in control,
So just let your simple life unfold.


Details | Verse | |

Why is Hate?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my colour,
You need to define it,
What is a best colour?
And why?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my religion,
You need to define it,
What is a best religion?
And why?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my language,
You need to define it,
What is a best language?
And why?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my poverty,
You need to define it,
Why am I poor?
And who is responsible for it?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my skills,
You need to define it,
What is your disability?
Why can you not learn?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my nationality,
You need to define it,
Why do you prefer your nationality?
How can I improve my backwardness?

If do you hate me?
The cause of my Birth,
You need to define it?
What caste and race is best?
And why?

Let’s cooperate to learn,
How can we become a human?
Animals, birds, flowers and human,
That is a bunch of nature,
Nature provides a life to live.


Details | I do not know? | |

Hate

I hate myself,

I hate this life,

To end it all,

With a painful knife,

I cover the pain,

I cover the hole,

Burning inside,

Torching my soul,

Stand on the ledge,

Ready to jump,

Leaving this world,

Is never enough,

Alone in this darkness,

Alone in this life,

Thinking about,

The pain of the knife,

Is it enough,

To cover the hole,

To end my life,

Finish my soul,

To feel the pain,

Is bad enough,

To go through it each day,

Is more than just kid stuff


Details | Lyric | |

Tempered Circles

Burning with the flames of past exchange
An interwoven thought with new distaste
Shadows ever dancing with our remains
A new-found hate for what we face

Washed up by the tides of endless grief
Now everything is gone, replaced by need
And now we understand the sea of greed
A new-found hate for our disease

Frozen by the loss of when we tried
Even though we know no compromise
Who is there to blame when fear decides?
A new-found hate for all their lies

Melted by the sight of her command
I justify my heart and take her hand
Another lovely tale that turns to sand
A new-found hate for where I am

Burning with the flames of past exchange
Another stupid end that has me taste
The circle of my bitter hate

Tempered by the thoughts that I remain
Spinning in a circle of my own blame
The circle of my weathered pain


Details | I do not know? | |

I hate

I hate that when I think of you
I can feel your body pressed against mine
Like we are one with our souls intertwined

I hate that when I talk to you
I can taste your kiss
And my body fills with a total bliss

I hate that when i see you
You put a smile on my face
And make me feel like Im in a totally different place

I hate that your to stubborn
To tell me how you really feel

I hate that you know
What’s going on inside of me 
Without me saying a word

I hate that every night 
I fall more in love with you
And that I may not ever know how much I mean to you

I hate that I long for your touch
And your kisses so much

But most of all I hate
That one day we will be together
That is our fate
But right now I have to wait


Details | I do not know? | |

Behind The Scenes

Wear the mask that conceals your fate
And try to fit into lies that you adore
Adore with all your shredded heart
Read the map- it clearly states that
Everything you learned went out the door
With all the love that failed the audition

Action, camera, action!
I don't feel the need to waste more tape now

I try to love impurity
As much as I deny it
Deny it for
All the sins that wish
To stay with me

Do you know that mask doesn't fit your face, darling?
Did you know that your lies were caught on tape, darling?

Action, camera, action!
I don't feel the need to waste more tape now

I try to love impurity
As much as I deny it
Deny it for
All the sins that wish
To stay with me eternally

I try to love complexity
As much as I hate it
I hate it for 
All the things you told me
The things that had been already erased

I hate to admit this...
I hate to admit this...
I hate to admit this...
But it's me who hasn't been
Reading between the lines


Details | I do not know? | |

People from my past

    I hate seeing people from my past and I know it may sound bad to say that but you were apart 
of me like a glove; you stole a piece of my heart from the first glance. I hate it when they mention 
your name especially because it makes my heart skip a beat. It never fails in my mind I just 
count the seconds until they enter your name into the conversation. You were truly magnificent 
and people will always talk about you but that doesn't mean I want to hear it. Even though I can't 
help but smile whenever I hear about you I get upset whenever the news isn't good. I can't help 
being stuck on you like glue... I want you but your miles away and I can't reach. A confused look 
comes across my face everytime I get back to feeling like a 13 year old. You were in my day 
dreams and in my head whenever my forehead hit the pillow I was thinking about you. So why 
now I mean how after all this time could I still want you to be mines? I am constantly confused 
and I am constantly upset that what I want I can never get.


Details | I do not know? | |

MoM

Why do you hate me?
think about when you used to bath me,
i have always had only one Wish for you,
a wish for you to love me,
but that one wish never came true,
every day you make me feel blue,
my life seems empty because of you,
But mom your the one who made me, and why this way,
if only i could of paid you to love me,
i would of but that would'nt of been right,
Why'd you have to be so mean to me,
i wish that i just woke up,
and this was all a dream,
mom i know you hate me, 
wanted only one girl and had two,
but thats to bad for me,
because the really sad part of this life,
is that ""you'll always be my MOM!""


Details | I do not know? | |

The Current

Here again and flooding the skies
My dreams are numb as days become night
My lies delude and strangle my mind
The hands of faith will hide from my sight
The signs are clear
My time so near
But I jump and fall to know that I’m here

I fall away
The life within will hold onto me
My eyes burn as I believe
But I smile and start to see
My hate fades and I’m so free

I’ve woken
I’m life again
You’re broken
So I’ll pretend
For all the things that have taken me down
With all the life that seemingly drowns
I take your eyes and try to replay
I see your lies and what you’ve repaid
It’s clear
With time so near
I’ll jump and die to know that I’m here

I fall away
The life within will hold onto me
My eyes burn as I believe
But I smile and start to see
My hate fades and I’m so free

You’ve woken
I hold you close
We’ve spoken
Remember us
There is hate surrounding all of our lives
There is death distorting all of our sighs
With fear and plague just mocking our cries
Please remember why we survive
It’s clear
My cries are fear
I leave you now to know why I’m here

I fall away
The life within will hold onto me
My eyes burn as I believe
But I smile and start to see
My hate fades and I’m so free
I’m trying to stay
But I can’t hold on
My last day
Soon I’ll be gone

We’ve spoken
I held you close
You’ve woken
Just live and love


Details | Free verse | |

LOve and Hate

LOve and Hate 
LOve and hate are the two opposites of fate. 
The sound of noise given; 
the music given from one we love; 
the discordant jarring memories of lost loved ones, 
mothers even fathers some lost sisters brothers, 
wandering in pain our bodies suffer. 
  
 Until united once again in love: 
We can rediscover 
that our souls are new. 
Important feelings are left inside our selfish solitudes 
as we  embrace each othere. 
In growing lassitude trying to emulate 
the oneness of GOD. 
  
 Love and hate we dew embrace as fate. 
Hang on to one and let go of the othere. 
LOve is new,hate is just to suffer. 
                                                                                   
 Black  is white that is shaded. 
Gray  remains the color of time. 
Purple hues embues the sky. 
Opposites are just harmfull it is true. 
Darkness is night and light is love. 
Come to me my love and love me in the day.


Details | Free verse | |

Likeable you

   We fell 
  two hearts
   became one
      I thought 
        we'd stay
          but eventually
           we stopped
              now your going up
               while i'm going down
                  friends love your company
                  so I can't just leave skip town
                       I can't just forget
                         how can I?
                               Likeable you would never let me
                               And little old me couldn't just let things be
                                      I hate my life
                                         to ironic for my taste
                                           cause it's not just that
                                                   I like you
                                              that irks my nerves
                                                  It's that likeable you 
                                             could never stop being likeable   
                                                 Therefore I have no one to talk to
                                                      cause they wouldn't understand
                                                           why i'm trying to hate you
                                                               they wouldn't get it
                                                                   cause your so likeable 
                                                                           that i'm alone 
                                                                         even with my closest friends
                                                                              and that's a new kinda low
                                                                                A new below 
                                             


Details | I do not know? | |

Minds Breath

The days I lost were spent and worthless
For years I tried to feel my purpose
Not what they say, not what I’m told
Not what I see, my fear grows
To know I’m here, to know what comes
To feel my fear as anger drums
It took me down

The dreams I kept were used and endless
I threw away and felt so careless
Not worth my time, not worth my life
Not in my mind, it leaves my sight
So tired of loss, so tired of hate
But with this time there grew my fate
It took me in

The light becomes my eyes
The clearing shows me why
Alone I see the sky
I walk away from lies

Today I see my purpose
A day of vain is worthless
A mind of hate is careless
The moment we die can’t hurt us
The lies we hate, the hate builds fear
This test in faith, the goal is clear
The day we’re free, the day we die
The seconds we breathe can leave our eyes
In fear we seek, in lies we hide
My heart is burnt but I now fly
The more I sigh, the more I smile
The more I cry there’s less denial
So fear it not and let it go
Retrieve some light and feel it grow
Today I feel, today I see
The end will come, by then I’m free
It tests me now
I’m lost somehow


Details | Free verse | |

without

My tears are rain drops in denial
I hate to see him clothed with other girls.
Their laughter pierces my ears like cotton bullets
They pull me away from everything I want
My heart to turns to hate and bakes like loathed bread
He doesn’t notice me anymore than he did before.
I’ll stay here and hibernate in my thoughts,
Trying to set the blade away for now.
I hate to see the other beauty that surpasses my own.
I think my only thought is to leave them all behind.


Details | Lyric | |

Painful Revelation

Sweet release within a rushed escape
Bitter love and then some mutual rape
Innocence relived with blinded eyes
Deeper now to see it’s just a lie

Strength of steel after all the games
Strength of gods when walking through the pain
An understanding of a darker place
Deeper now that you have had a taste

Can you survive a bullet to the head?
Can you stand up even though you’re dead?
Will we smile again despite our wounds?
Can we breathe light despite the favoured moon?

The darkest nature’s without sacrifice
Forgetting truth is why we weave the night
Bettering or choosing to succumb
Deepening the hate that makes us numb

Can you turn your pain into some truth?
Can you live knowing that you could lose?
Will we end the hate that needs our souls?
Can we forgive despite the pain that grows?


Details | I do not know? | |

Following Dreams

Lifestyle is what you make
Not what they have told you
A lifestyle within their wake
You follow what they do

A lifestyle of soul retort
The dreams of their empathy
Lifestyle of what you bought
The mind is the enemy

Afraid now of what you think
Ignore it like they do
Pray now that there’s a link
Pray now you’re normal

Ash and dreams will cover all
There’s no way you’ll die now
This very second you could fall
But you’re too caught in your lies

Follow all the gatherings
Safety now in numbers
You’ve no clue of the hate you bring
You’re too lost and bitter

It seems their dreams had tricked your mind
You’re ageing and you’re wasted
As long as you believe you stood their line
As long as there’s some life you tasted

God came
He showed me why
It seems that he is in me
I know now I must please him
White came
Am I in a dream?
Turns out that I’m in limbo
It’s a test of what I make it

Hate rules and takes our souls
But I know I must grow stronger
If I resist and see my goal
This hate will rule no longer
Within my mind I see the key
My dream is what I make it
I’ll make it turn so I can see
A world where dreams are happy


Details | I do not know? | |

Dead

When should I awake?
But when should I get some sleep?
Within my mind I’ll make
Contortions of my excuse
When should I resist?
My hatred likes to breathe
Why do I assist?
Been dying for far too long

Here it comes and here I go to hate myself
Breathing nothing, killing something with its help
Writing these things, justifying my own wealth
I’m just dead and nothing now can give me health

But now everything is fine
I’ve found another way
I let this thing reside
I make another day
There’s laughter all around
Usually from my mind
I feel that there’s no sound
And I am just dead and blind

So here it comes and here I go to hate myself
Breathing nothing, killing something with its help
Writing these things, justifying my own wealth
I’m just dead and nothing now can give me health
I learnt too much to take in everything you’ve lied
In death I see myself and it’s here I thrive
Lie to me and tear me down before I’m alive
I’ll love you for all you try

Just tear away my face
Never let me hide
In this cornered place
I smile deep inside
I am not really here
Nor can I cry in pain
I’ll let you beat my fear
If you can really see my game

I’ll turn to something that ends in nothing just to breathe again
I’ll become you to let you think I’m listening
But solitude and dying off is what I’m still craving
There never was such a thing as sane
Life is just another game
Selfless only means for fame
Desiring love to make life stay the same
The rest is just to entertain


Details | I do not know? | |

Bottled Up

Is feeling hate
So strongly a crime
Because that's all I feel as of late
Causing me to explode at the drop of the dime
Making friends leave my side
Leaving no one left to talk to
Due to the hate I keep inside
Leaving me with no one to help me through
The worst that is yet to come
Having to fight this alone
Maybe I'll only have to cut some
To make my heart like stone
Again to keep this hate locked away
Until I feel my heart can be told
That it doesn't have to go or stay
And it no longer has to be cold


Details | Lyric | |

Nature of a Lie

Written in a hidden ink
The lies you write begin to sink
The flesh can hold no second vow
As the thing you hate becomes you now

Place of pain and dying eyes
Within yourself, within your cries
Reflected onto those you see
And now the surface is all that can be

You are the proof of how to fall
The nature of a lie so tall
Accept the truth, accept the signs
If you don’t you’ll only die

Stand or fade, it’s up to you
The choice is there and so is truth
Just because they’ve fallen too
That’s no excuse to follow through

Written in a hidden ink
The sounds you use begin to sink
Then death reflects your hidden face
As the thing you hate becomes your grace


Details | Rhyme | |

Thin Line

How can you hate the one you see
And love someone you can not see at all?
How can you love the one who's forgiven you,
Then hate someone because of their faults?

We all have fallen short of perfection.
Still, we are short with others when they fall,
Except when we trip over our own feet.
We want a hand and understanding thoughts.


Details | Verse | |

A Slogan

(Dedicated to 
President George W Bush)
I were poor
And struggling for living,
Why did you hate me?
If you was wise.

I were illiterate,
And struggling for education,
Why did you hate me?
If you was social.

When I asked you for food,
You asked me to kill someone,
The cause of your benefit,
I were a criminal.

When I asked you for shelter,
You asked me to sell drug,
The cause of my poverty,
I were a criminal.

You was rich and intelligent,
You believe in justice,
You know about a standard for living,
You want to enjoy peace.

What was wrong if I were innocent?
You raped my younger,
And blamed me,
Because I were crying for justice.

What is a vision of peace?
If you exploited me,
Only the cause of your education,
Your status is holding a right.

You can kill me or rape me,
You can kick me or punish me,
You deliver injustice and disturbance,
Is Peace a slogan to befool me?


Details | I do not know? | |

Before I die

If I shall SING before I die 
let it not be of STRIFE AND HATE 
for too much of THIS my eyes have seen 
Maybe one day this world won't seem so mean
Let me SING of peace and happiness 
instead of hate and selfishness 
If I shall SING before I die 
Let it not be of a dreadful disease that has taken over me
to many friends I have lost 
went away their lives were tossed 
Let me dream of FAITH from up above 
and the perfect name of JESUS called love 
If I shall SING before I die 
let it not be of hunger and poverty 
but of how to fight for democracy 
while standing in the rain 
I will always claim your name
Let me SING of heaven A PLACE called home 
so I WILL NEVER be alone  


Details | I do not know? | |

My Dad

I know what has happened to me
Deep inside my past
But I don't regret the things
That have been done to me
Because it made me who I am
I know it took sometime for me
To believe in myself
But I hate what he's done to me
And my family he killed
I hate him and I will never forgive him
For what he has done
But I know deep inside of me
I would like to see him burn
I hate him I really truly do
I just hope he's hurt know one
And no one will hurt him
The way that he's hurt me and you


Details | I do not know? | |

I hate the man in the mirror

I Hate the Man in the Mirror

I hate the man in the mirror,
Because of the reflections I see brings more pain,
I see things more clearly
The picture I painted for what is call "my life,"
What is your definition for "sacrifice?"
For Christ his sacrifice his life out of the action of love,
I I’m guilty of the crime but I'll let god be the one to judge,
Through the years all of blood, sweat, and tears,
The friends lost in the wind, 
I even witness a family I once call my owe slowly disappear,
The fears of being alone inside this world so cold,
I can't close eye at night because it’s hard to vision home...
Is this a gift or a curse?
To see this world like I Nostradamus, 
I promise no prophecy,
Look through these eyes and all you'll see is a soul search for peace,
In this life of mines and hard times,
Asking the lord to show me a sign because if I die will I wake by your side,
Am I'm blind or am I'm just another child lost inside the dark,
And if I'm lost why no one could hear my cries...


Details | I do not know? | |

Pain

I hate myself,

I hate this life,

To end it all,

With a painful knife,

I cover the pain,

I cover the hole,

Burning inside,

Torching my soul,

Stand on the ledge,

Ready to jump,

Leaving this world,

Is never enough,

Alone in this darkness,

Alone in this life,

Thinking about,

The pain of the knife,

Is it enough,

To cover the hole,

To end my life,

Finish my soul,

To feel the pain,

Is bad enough,

To go through it each day,

Is more than just kid stuff