You, who are so perfect in my eyes, so beautiful- adorable, and I, so flawed, ugly, damaged and crawling with defects; why do you enjoy my company?
You, who are so sleek and slender, humming with a quiet intellect and a serenity about you, and I, so grossly overweight and pretentiously boastful and nervous; how can you abide my company?
You, who are a paragon of patience, so understanding and self-assured, and I, so insanely impulsive, so myopic and brimming with self-doubt; how do you stand my company?
You, who are so sweet, so considerably kind, so thoughtful and generous, and I, so bitter, so selfish, so self-absorbed; why do you choose my company?
You, who are so self-composed, full of self-control, so sound and stable, and I, so very neurotic, so completely compulsive and verily volatile; how can you tolerate my company?
You, who are so diligent, so driven and ambitious, so achieving, and I, so lackadaisically lazy, so uninspired, so complacent; why do you settle for my company?
You, who are ethical, so moral, so very virtuous, and I, so corrupt, so unprincipled, so wholly wicked; how can you endure my company?
You, who are so normal, so well-adjusted, so conventional, and I, so maniacal, so unbalanced and irrational; why do you condone my company?
You, who are bubbling with charm, who loves unconditionally and is absolutely accepting, and I, boiling with rage, fueled by misanthropy and incredibly intolerant; how can you welcome my company?
That you love and accept me for who and what I am, is a treasure beyond measure. I cherish your company, but why you cherish mine is something I cannot fathom. All I know is that I love you, my dear, beloved friend.
**This was written for two very dear friends: Karen and Tommy :)
***I also love palindromes ;)
*****FREE VERSE OLD AND NEW ENTRY
I am the hypocritical Christian.
I say I follow Christ,
But I'm still consumed by my demons.
I go to church on Sunday,
But I refuse to invite someone back.
I want to serve on mission,
But I'm too afraid to act.
They think I read The Bible,
But I just fall asleep in it.
They think I'm positivity and smiles,
But underneath I'm death and addictions.
They think I'm clean and pure,
But I'm broken and mistaken.
I say I'm not worthy of His love,
But Jesus will never let me be forsaken.
I pray long prayers,
But inside they're empty repetition.
It might look as if my faith is strong,
But my core is too easily shaken.
I say the things I'm supposed to say,
But don't follow His actions or obey.
I speak the truth the church wants to hear,
But deep inside on matters I don't know what to believe.
I walk in shame as if I'm not good enough
To be loved by God and saved through Christ,
But there is nothing I could ever do to earn His peace;
It's a free gift.
Now forgiven, changed, and released.
Thank You God,
Thank You Jesus,
Thank You Holy Spirit!
In Jesus' Holy Name,
Sometimes in relationships our love defeats our lust, but sometimes not;
Sometimes in relationships our peace is kept by trust, but sometimes not.
Sometimes in relationships we, each to each, are hurt and held and healed;
Sometimes in relationships we share our heart and mind, but sometimes not.
Sometimes we are lost lovers, our lives blaze with brighter bursts of passion;
Sometimes we are best friends, we balance with compassion, but sometimes not.
Sometimes we are up-in-arms night and day, our battles are fought and won;
Sometimes we are at-loose-ends and struggle to be one, but sometimes not.
Sometimes we are with others, together we entertain family;
Sometimes we are you and me; two is good company, but sometimes not.
I want to be worth not loosing
The friend you won't let down
The one person you won't lie to, no matter how bad the truth may hurt
I want you to know you hold more, than my heart
You hold my future, my dreams, my tears and my smiles
I want you to know a look is all it takes to be enough
I get scared when I feel insecure, don't get mad, hold me
Trusting you is more important than diamonds and gold
I want to be worth not taking those daring chances
I offer you these things in return without the asking
Only then will I give my full heart in return
Such explosions of love ecstatic
from fumbling youths and naive romantics.
In wedded bliss when passions flowed
two people alone in honeymoon glow
Flammable pleasure, ignitable moments to treasure,
we did love, we did fight, You and I.
Like awaited episodes of a reality show,
responsibilities began to gnaw as they grow.
The candle of love flickered with breath abated
claiming its due from fires deflated.
Though loving was tender still quick to temper
we did love, we did fight, You and I.
The children gone and the house deserted
alone again with our quality time protected.
A simple touch, a gentle nudge then smiling,
at such an age one mistake saw patience flying.
Eyes bleary, hard or hearing but recalling clearly,
we did love, we did fight, You and I.
The rocking chair now sways to silent music
only in the eyes can one realise, such beauty.
Smoldering fires of love and reined in emotions,
memorising every tryst with pledges of devotions.
Blessed with so much given and oceans of raw passion
in abundance we lived as God promised, His love unrationed.
still we hated, we had to fight, but we did love You and I.
Look at me
And I’ll return your gaze
But know not what you see
Talk to me
And I will answer
But know not what you think
Listen to me
And I’ll tell you of me
But know not what you hear
But touch me
And I will know you
And understand that you
I spent the evening
wishing you would make the first move.
I marked your song
but listened from a safe distance.
The gap between us elongated
like an escalator
laying down its treads
with the handrail busy, trying playing catch–up.
Over dinner the distance between us grew wider.
But we carried on as if we were governed by some unwritten rule.
But like a fool, I held back
least the evening might finish too soon.
I surveyed your face for that give away glance.
Waited patiently for that inner dance.
Hoping that it would surface.
But your light remained red
even though I was on amber.
So I stayed, quiet, still.
Smiling, nodding and agreeing.
Mirroring your every gesture.
Matching your every move.
I searched inwardly for a hint of salvation.
I searched outwardly for some possible intension.
I was hurting like a defeated soldier.
I want to know you before you get older.
I spent an evening
wishing I had made the first move.
I marked your song
but foolishly maintained a distance.
It was as if time had resisted capture
hid its most precious commodities
averted its eyes lest you see into its soul
withheld all but the extremes of color
Everything became a negative reflection
black on white, white on black
variations of both accounting for contrast
allowing the moment to be stolen
There would be future arguments
regarding what color the dress was,
why Mom always had on the same housecoat,
where was Dad when they took the pictures
Time’s reluctant moment would pierce the future
prick deeply the longings of our hearts,
elicit laughter – and tears – intermingling
remind us that we too had been young
The old camera, the canisters, the leather case
the eye that captured a moment of life
offering it to us - as a window
into our future.
John G. Lawless
Forgotten thoughts resurface like the dim light of the stars
seeping from the wounds that sit on shelves in broken jars
never to be mended in the tattered threads I've weaved
knotted in the fabric of the falsehoods I believed
to bind me in the cobalt tide that no one vessel keeps
what seems are dreams for some of you are nightmares while I sleep.
Proudly they parade in gaudy colors crimson laced
radiating fiercly from the fears I haven't faced
crashing as the seas of sorrow wash the taste of pain
out of my mouth as I turn south where nothing left remains
but scattered, dusty memories and used up yesterdays
and scars that last from days gone past in hues of blacks and greys.
A wind came along, and we were set free
away from two places, where we used to be.....
Circling and settling, folding over and over again,
until the shape we once knew, was made into new
Origami stars, one sun, one moon, one world
Where outside, looking in, eyes can't see where we connect;
Built to be strong, but light as the air
Built to face winds, and that tumble and tear
With strength to face night when dark stays too long
Never will we understand the shifts and strains of wayward winds
that whirl, and rattle and open fate's own door
The knowing why is not what counts, what matters deeply more...
is when I reach my hand to touch this vaporous thing...
it is too impossible to define
Mortal words cannot explain, .......... nothing to see, nothing to touch,
just the faint breath of us
A truth, not myth....that final sleep cannot erase....
So sure this breath of life we share
is reason enough, that we are here
A Mother’s Love…
How precious is the love
of a mother’s heart!
Even as a child… It’s there from the start.
A mother’s love knows
no boundary or limit.
It’s often shown by how
much the mother gives it!
Whether her children are
young or growing old…
And whatever circumstances
in life may unfold…
Her love is continually
a solid foundation…
That can’t be removed, torn or shaken.
Her love is what is
a “guiding force…”
Even if her children’s lives
stray “off course.”
I’m thankful for the love
my mother’s given…
It’s surely influenced
the way I’ve been livin’!
To all of our mothers across
our great nation…
May we show them our love
Their love has stood and
endured the test of time…
I’m so glad that one of them is MINE!
By Jim Pemberton
Oh what a mistake I have made,
Traveled so far to end up this way.
Not in a million years would I have guessed,
That this idea was truly not one of my best.
Never had known things had changed so much,
We for sure had fallen so far out of touch.
So many different do's , don't , and bewares,
Actually has left me absolutely scared.
What a fool I was to ever believe,
That she would ever be in love with me.
At my age you would think I know better,
You can trust this will be remembered forever.
Oh what a terrible mistake I have made,
Wanting all these memories to just fade away.
All this time I have always had my doubts,
Not the person led to believe is what I found out.
To be deceived and lied to for oh so long,
Down deep I knew there was something wrong.
Head over heels I had fallen in love ,
Always thought you were sent from above.
How the knife is twisted into my side ,
So much pain I can do nothing but cry.
These memories of what I thought was real,
I'm confused and I don't how how to feel.
Is this really possible that I did not know,
Through all this time it never showed.
Such an evil thing to do to a man ,
Especially the lies which he could not stand.
How cruel and cold your heart must be ,
To carry on as you did never letting me see.
Hard to accept all those moments so dear ,
Realizing they are now my greatest fears .
What was to be Joy and Happiness,
Replaced by the feelings of a loneliness.
Never did I imagine this happening to me ,
Thinking that you and I were meant to be .
It's a very hard thing for a man to accept ,
When he finds out that he's been tricked.
Was it the money or the control you had ,
Maybe because you are really just that bad.
Some day soon for this you will have to pay ,
For the sins against me and your evil ways.
Goodbye to you who ever you are ,
For in this heart you have left brutally scarred.
May the Love of Jesus Touch You!
May the love of Jesus bless and touch you!
May his presence be with
and uplift you!
May the joys of the love make
And touch you, from your
head to your feet!
May the glory of the lord
be with and keep you!
His majestic power can really touch you!
May the words that he’s spoken,
touch your spirit!
His mercy and salvation…
He freely give it!
May the sweetness of Jesus,
into your life bring!
His righteousness and beauty!
May you take some time
with Jesus in prayer?
How much he loves you!
How much he cares!
By Jim Pemberton 07.28.13
What Is This Church All About?
Is this church meant for people like me?
Is this where God really wants me to be?
They claim to be filled with God’s spirit.
When it comes to HIS truth... Can they give it?
I’m sure there’s many who come and attend
It’s more than “church on Sunday,” that we must spend!
We must reach out to the lost and the oppressed!
After all, Christ gave us his very best!
May we all preach the gospel and God’s holiness!
And strive to seek his awesome righteousness!
Living for Jesus must be a daily walk and experience!
Not simply based on our “ambitious self appearance.”
God isn’t interested in a denomination or a title…
He wants to know… Do we really believe the Bible?
He’s not interested in the money put in the offering plate.
He wants to know; “Are you ready
to enter heaven’s gate?”
May we strive to serve Jesus with a zeal and passion!
And be filled with his holiness and compassion!
May we serve Jesus from a heart of humbled confession!
And making our commitment to him,
our #1 possession!
“Unless the Lord builds the house.”
They labor in vain that build it!
Let’s seek the power of God!
May his presence completely fill it!!
By Jim Pemberton
A new photograph floats to the surface
Playfully dressing up as the world around me
Hat, striped socks and all
Tiptoeing at the top for one last sweet moment
Before sinking back into my ocean mind.
One after another they arrive
Steeping my eyes in the world
As the minds shutter, ever fluttering
Strings together this conscious stream I play in.
My photographs fade in time’s wrinkled arms.
Joining their brothers and sisters at the ocean floor,
They hold hands and try to answer the question that is always asking itself:
Who am I?
P aranoia permeates, etching itself into your fractured face,
A cacophony of constant pressure; life remains a stressful race,
N othing to hope for, no positives like promotion in the workplace,
I nability to love, relationships lift anchor and set sail without chase,
C hildren crushing dreams under mortgages; age grows with disgrace
I do not know?
The Beach of Promises
Fingers entwined, barely touching,
turquoise waters teasing your dancing toes,
strolling along that serene deserted beach,
our promised dreams within aching reach.
Hands clasped, holding on,
sea-breezes tickling the nape of your neck,
walking together, alone, vowing to never breach,
the dreams dreamed on that faraway velvet beach.
Hands in my pockets, alone,
traces of you linger, teasing,
lost in my scribbles, your memory fading out of reach,
my thoughts ablaze, now and then,
catching a whiff of your fragrance,
wafting through alleyways of nostalgia,
your hand in mine on our pristine beach.
Let the Deicide commence.
You're a voyeur at best!
Your vampiric heart is beating out of your chest!
And you have slayed the ones whom would love you for anything less
Ready to consume the final fragments of innocence,
And for you there is no forgiveness,
On your knees pleading, screaming to a tyrant in the skies;
The father of lies.
I will never be enslaved in your superiority
The people agree: jaded of your false dichotomies.
Know: I will be whomever nature intends to be
Apollo and I will share our dreams,
and you will be forced to see
I know who you are...
Readily the first to present your scars
Chained by some despot or mental czar
An emotional homunculus in your mind, behind bars
Reluctant to escape - even when proven fake
Your demented mind - depths no one will penetrate!
...And you see me suffering
Not caring of any casualties
Just as long you recieve your safeguard of sympathy
So very wary of the masses and their Anarchy; Liberious ways
Solipsist - Is there no one you can see?
Even if she was presented burning?
Solipsist - Is there no one you can believe?
Even if Sophia was screaming?
Solipsist - Know you have killed and abused me
Imprisoned in your own personal reality
I do not know?
written 10th Aug 2013
I am God's child, first and forever
I am known by many different titles, a daughter
I am a wife
I am a mother
I am a grandmother
I am a poet
I am by several ways, known as a sister
I am an acquaintance
I am a loyal friend
I am a stranger
I am a cousin
I am an Auntie
I am a niece
But who is this person, they all call "Denise?"
She is a child to God
She is a niece
She is a cousin
She is a stranger
She is a loyal friend
She is an acquaintance
She is known to many, a sister
She is a poet
She is a grandmother
She is a mother
She is a wife
She is known as a daughter to many
She is everything, she'd ever dreamed her life to be....
She is happier than she ever imagined possible
SHE IS "DENISE"
There’s many people who claim they’ve nothing to “hide!”
They tend to use the rainbow
as a source of their “pride.”
But if you read in the book of Genesis, it is revealing.
God’s purpose of the rainbow had a different meaning!
The rainbow was there when much
of mankind disappeared!
There was a promise of God that was so very clear.
He promised to never again destroy man with a flood.
This was his promise... An extension of his love!
It was never intended as his approval for perversion!
Mankind still needs a Jesus filled holy conversion!
The colors of the rainbow can’t wash away sin’s dark stain!
This can only happen by the
power of Jesus’ name!
The colors are beautiful… But man’s heart is filled with deceit!
Without the soul cleansing power of Jesus…
We’re never complete!
No court decision can give the freedom that many desire!
Only the power of the cross can
change you this very hour!
The only way to find equality with God, is through the cross!
Without his words of truth…
We are forever LOST!
Look past the colors of the rainbow! Seek the power of the blood!
Then you too, can be changed from
God’s power from above!
By Jim Pemberton
God Gives Us Brothers and Sisters For A Reason!
God gives us brothers and sisters for a reason!
As children, we have each other, throughout the seasons!
We laugh and play together and do all sorts of things…
Often not realizing what the future of life brings!
As kids, we often share whatever life may give us!
And stick together, no matter what trials may face us!
But, as we grow older, too often, we part separate ways.
And lose any contact with each other for countless days!
I’ve seen all kinds of things tear families all apart.
Often, there’s some kind of
unforgiveness of the heart!
If you, and your siblings, have reached a separation…
May you seek Jesus for
a Godly reconciliation!
As family, whatever divides, must be lifted up in prayer!
Where two or three are gathered… God is there!
Just think about what the family unit has become!
The love of Jesus must be what binds us all as one!
Getting along as a family, is more than just a “feeling!”
The blood of Christ needs to bring an “inner healing!”
The family that each of us have,
may not be here tomorrow!
Are you one who’s holding on to bitterness and sorrow?
May the words of Christ help us all to get along!
That through HIM, our families
will be STRONG!
By Jim Pemberton 10/20/13
I do not know?
It didn't take you long to figure it all out ,
Once it was clear in your mind with no doubts.
Now that you know does it anger you so,
Or are you just accepting it as another blow.
How many times will it take for you to see ,
By never saying nothing they will not let you be.
A understanding you will never be able to reach,
Because you are so different and have opposite beliefs.
Are you able to agree that even time would never heal,
The damage they caused and the way it made you feel.
It's such a sad state of affairs the actions by others,
You once considered them as your sisters and brothers.
There will come a day when the memories will fade,
Only then will you be able to find your own way.
I can only tell you that it's good to listen sometimes,
Trust me on this and you will forever be fine.
Many In Church Don’t Know of God’s Power!
There’s many people who attend church on Sundays.
And yet don’t really understand what God’s word says!
Many get excited when the church has a “coffee hour.”
But few really have a desire to experience God’s power!
Prayer time is too often just a few words that are said.
They sing a good tune, but many are “spiritually dead.”
An evangelist comes to town, and many rush to see him!
It’s almost like they want to “bow down” before him!
I’m not here to look for a preacher to get me “excited.”
I want to experience the power of God, that he’s provided!
If I need a drive thru restaurant, I don’t need a church to do it!
When it comes to knowing God’s power… Many refuse it!
It’s only the power of the Lord Jesus, that can raise the dead!
It’s only through knowing his word, that we can truly be fed!
If you want someone to stroke you ears, you’ll find them!
Many will say what you want to hear! You probably know them!
But if you really want the power of God to really change you!
You need to seek his presence! And allow it to touch you!
If you can’t find it in a church building, get into a prayer closet!
There’s a move of God that’s stirring! But many have lost it!
Seek the Lord while he may be found! And enter into his presence!
The Holy Spirit wants to fill you with power! And is omnipresent!
Please come Lord Jesus, and forgive us of our sinful living!
May we enter your courts with a heart
of praise and thanksgiving!
We need you Lord Jesus! May we lift your name up higher!
And seek to be filled with your Holy Ghost’ fire!
By Jim Pemberton 10/09/13
One beautiful lie , an unvoiced sonnet
Words veiled with a crime that steals my hearts last beat
Slow turn of your mood shows me disquiet
With kisses warm and vulgar with deceit.
One pulse stills, our love was not the one love,
Just remains of a lukewarm cup of tea.
You steep and brood, one pineing the lost dove.
My broken wing lame, I fall into the sea.
Beautiful lies, my heart begs for your fires
To hear the words forged my way by anvil
Beautiful lies, hope grows dim and expires
Waiting for judgment by divine gavel
Tremble my lips , tears fall dry from my eyes
Protect me from madness, beautiful lies.
Man's Corruption... God's Redemption!
The Bible speaks of man's sin and corruption.
That's why God has offered us, his redemption!
The heart is desperately wicked above all things.
There's an evil corruption that sin brings!
The Lord searches our heart and tests our ways.
He watches our lives, all of our days!
There's nothing good in ourselves.
Not now, or ever!
Without God's mercy...
We're doomed forever!
But, through Christ, there's a way and a plan!
He made this available to every woman and man!
His gift of salvation is a message of love, made clear!
The coming of Jesus Christ,
draws ever so near!
We can trade our sinful corruption,
for a new way of living!
Won't you come before the Lord,
with a heart of giving?
Giving our life to Jesus,
is the best thing to do!
By his power and grace, you can be
made BRAND NEW!
I'm thankful for his salvation!
Mercy has been applied!
Because of Christ' death on the cross…
I'm now sanctified!
By Jim Pemberton
We Need God Back Into Our Schools!
There are some trying to remove God from this nation!
They do is under; “a church and state separation.”
For many years, God was taught in our schools!
Until the Supreme Court took it away, with it’s rules!
As so many young people look to fill life’s “void.”
They try many things that they think they’ll enjoy!
Rather than having God’s word to obey and live by.
They choose the kind of life that they will die by!
Drugs, sex and violence of many perverted kinds.
Are what is now filling so many young people’s minds!
Read the headlines! Many young people are stressed out!
Yet our government can’t seem to figure it out!
Another shooting… Another act of violence appears!
While any kind of answer seems to have disappeared!
The answer is not more money to solve their problem!
No matter how much the government tries to solve them!
Let me give you answer. It’s called “read the Bible 101!”
It’s time to repent to God the father, the spirit and the son!
Our young people need God brought back into their life!
And allow him to heal their brokenness and strife!
Jesus Christ is the solution for which many are asking!
Only he can give anyone a life that’s everlasting!
Please come Lord Jesus! And heal the wounded hearts!
It’s everyone one of us, that it needs to start!
No court or school can separate God’s love for you and me!
Where will you spend your eternity?
By Jim Pemberton 10/24/13
I Know of Someone Holding Unforgiveness!
I know of someone holding unforgiveness!
This has led to a life of much bitterness!
Toward his brother, he’s held on to a grudge.
From his viewpoint, he won’t even “budge.”
No matter what God’s word has clearly spoken…
He’s walked with a heart
that’s been broken!
His son prayed that God would speak to him!
That he would forgive, so God could heal him!
Forgiveness is a powerful thing to do!
If you want God’s mercy to
flow through you!
We’re not called to “hold back,”
the love God’s given!
Through Christ shed blood…
We’re all forgiven!
May the love of Christ come and touch us!
It’s no secret how much God
really loves us!
Please come Lord Jesus! And touch our soul!
May we express your love, wherever we go!
May God’s gentle love, be what always binds us!
HIS words; “love one another,”
do remind us!
By Jim Pemberton
Judas betrayed Jesus’s whereabouts
End, was near
Son of God, knew this
Universe of the Son of the Divine Father, restored
Sins of man forgiven, Prince of our Universal domain, alive in the hearts of his children