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Funny Places Poems | Funny Poems About Places

These Funny Places poems are examples of Funny poems about Places. These are the best examples of Funny Places poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Prose Poetry | |

Lucila

So I walked into my local supermarket
to buy my weekly shipment of Kit Kat bars,
Cinnamon Toast Crunch,
and Ovaltine powder mix.

As I shake off the snow on my fake Timberland boots,
my skin,
coated in frozen animation,
thaws into warmth’s teardrops from
the supermarket’s 75 degree vents.

This moist sense of happiness was quickly interrupted
when I heard Wilson Phillips, “Hold On”
over the PA system.

Thankfully, the cutlery isle was just to my left. 
So, now, I had plans!

But, before I could commit felony’s song,
I saw her.

A Portuguese goddess
with a strut that can ruin a man’s dignity.

She had Autobahn curves,
dark brown curls of hair & visuals,
and thick flesh meat that even Vegans would envy.

Her face lacked Maybelline coated misapprehension.
Thank God!
Cause I never did like clowns.

After staring longingly at her,
like a crack head with impulsive eyes upon a broken/unlabeled bag of baby powder,
she breezed past my stifled posture and clocked in to work.

She didn’t even get a chance to smell my $500 cologne called “Piece of Me”.

So with new-found urges to grab all my groceries,
like a burglar who really has to pee,
I rush to express checkout. 

There she is.

Her register beeps in coupon lady’s rhapsody,
while my register needs a cleanup on Isle 9.

Now it’s my turn.

With girlish inner-screams of boy-band intensity,
I say, “Hi”.

She scans my apples, while I scan her melons.
The melons that the customer ahead of me didn’t want…
…they were on sale.

Go fig.

As if she read my mind,
she asks,
“Are you feeling warm now?”

“All I want is to be the heat in your moment”,
which I almost said.

But, “Now I am”, is uttered.

As she smiled with seductive demure,
she handed me my receipt
with her phone number on back.

As I left the market,
I began to get cold again.

These winds of change
became gusts of numbness.

I locked myself out of my heart.

I turned around to go back inside.

Only to discover, 
she didn’t have the key.

© Drake J. Eszes


Details | Limerick | |

Viagra Falls

There once was a man from Niagara
whose wiener's so long it would stab ya'

but when it got little 
his pills became skittles   
until he O.D.'d on Viagra

© ~JSLambert  2011*****A classic "stiff" competitor, standing "firm" amongst other "members" in the "thick" of the competition:) hope everyone gets "a rise" out of it!


Details | Couplet | |

Loony Tunes

<                                        Cascading lakes and streams
                                           The loon stands out it seems

                                           Minnesota's state bird
                                           I know it must sound absurd


                                           Adopted in nineteen sixty one
                                           Wails and yodels heard under the sun


                                          Black and white bearing red eyes
                                          Wingspans five feet can make one cry


                                          Body lengths up to three feet
                                          Yet  clumsy on lands and moss peat


                                          They are high speed flyers
                                          And great underwater divers


                                          They can dive up to ninety feet
                                          In pursuit of fish they want to eat

                                      
                                         They are even on our license plates
                                         An critical habitat drawn on metal slates


                                         Twelve thousand of these unique birds
                                         God that has to be a lot of turds

 
                                        But for now I'll enjoy it's captured views
                                        Of this beautiful loon and it's most colorful hues








Written By Katherine Stella
Entry For Mini - Blog  Beautiful Bird Contest
By Constance ~ A Rambling Poet


Details | Narrative | |

Tallahassee Driving

upon hard grey streets of asphalt I drive
through morn’s muted orange glow 
white headlights shine, red brake lights blink in time
with changing signals red, yellow, green
disoriented city visitors a hindrance to the flow
why at seven a.m.

now stopped two cars back waiting for green
a woman in a minivan ahead primps methodically 
striving in effect to give herself a perm.
the man beside is engrossed in the news
early edition of  today’s tabloid spread over the wheel
will he know when it’s time to go

behind, a husband and wife, I assume
each talk animatedly on their phones
while obnoxious unrestrained children carouse 
a movie playing on the DVD
an ancient pickup stopped in the suicide lane
right turn flashing “let me in!”

green, the light changes, yet still we wait
one, two, three and horns start to blare
shaken are they from hypnotic states
virtual hair salons, libraries, and phone booths abandoned
traffic moves once again in earnest
until the very next crowded intersection.


Details | Rhyme | |

Granddads Book

In my quiet times I often try,
To remember places I've been.
To recall folk I have passed by,
And sights that I have seen.

There is nothing wrong with my mind,
Sometimes my memory is quite refined.
I think it's filled over many a year,
With so much junk, nothing seems clear.

So, I made up my mind to write it all down,
To recall it all caused me to frown
It started like I was in the dark,
A memory flared, I was in the park.

That day in the park was just the lever,
I found my mind was as good as ever.
Tho' times and places got out of line,
I wrote it all down, now wasn't I clever!

I'm nearly at the end of my story,
A journey I'm glad that I took.
For my grandsons to read in years to come,
I'll call it Granddads Book.

© Dave Timperley 2012.


Details | Rhyme | |

Where is the Bathroom?

I had to find a bathroom,
A reasonable request,
I was all alone
And my bladder was quite stressed.

So I asked a man nearby,
“Do you know where a bathroom is?”
He merely shook his head,
And went about his biz.

I continued walking,
And sure enough around,
A woman with her children
Could tell me where a bathroom’s found.

She said, “I have no idea,
I’m busy you can tell.”
She fussed to shush her baby,
Who had just begun to yell.

I continued on my quest,
Moving with rapid stride,
When I found a large restaurant,
Surely, there must be a bathroom inside!

I went up to the waiter,
I said, “I really have to pee.”
Slightly irritated,
I decided to forego all pleasantry.

He said, “Oh, ours isn’t working,
Someone clogged it the day before,
But there is one a few blocks down,
About three or four.”

And so I hurried along,
Quite desperate to find the joint,
My bladder was close to reaching
Its natural breaking point.

I reached a tiny gas station,
Where the clerk mumbled to me,
“We do have an outside bathroom,
But someone lost the key.”

I turned and stomped outside,
I wailed out vehemently,
“How hard is it to find a bathroom
In modern society?”

A gentleman heard my plight,
And said, “You know, there’s a store—“
I interrupted, “Never mind,
I don’t have to go anymore.”


Details | Free verse | |

Georgia Muse

I went to Georgia without my bonjo in my hand I knew it would be great after I landed and took a stand I told them my name and they asked, "What's your fame?" I reached for my muse and turned it loose like a goose They straightened their ties and said “O’ me, O’ my!” “We made a mistake about this poetic rhyming guy!” Someone handed me a bonjo and they all joined the tango My muse had its way and we had a wonderful stay As we departed for home they started to sing, “Hurry back poet, may your muse give you wings!”


Details | Free verse | |

The Arizona Heat ---Tagged!!!

The heat of summer makes her brain gelatin
The Arizona sun turns her into a skeleton
Time and space she does not put to waste
Really, this poet lady is one of great taste

Iced tea and lemonade in the Arizona sunlight
Create an atmosphere for her that’s just right
Ink just drying on her newly crafted poem
Always ready to rate on the pole of totem

Tall she stands with stature in poet's land
Only doing right waving her magic wand
Leading other poets to higher heights
Lovely readings are on her poetic site

Everyone should look in her poetic bag
What? Jill Martin, you are now tagged!



Comments:  Okay Jill, I was tagged by Tamiviolet Manchas.  As a result, I have to 
pass the tag along.   Your name is on the top of the list.  Your poetry is just 
wonderful!  Now, you must find a poet whose poetry you enjoy reading, and tag 
that poet with a poem.  Man, this is so much fun!  Chau!



Details | Free verse | |

Caught in the Rain

It came with a flash upon my back
Caught off guard, suspenders hanging
Madly rushing to find a place so safe

From around the bend with a honk
“Hey watch your steps” was a shout
Horn blowing while in passing 
One disgruntled taxi driver glaring
Newspaper umbrella in ruins

Noisy rumbling above from a subway
Heading down the track, clank, clank, clank
Brown dog barking, woof, woof, looking back

Shelter at last, finally found a spot
The rain came down with a heavy shout 
Caught shirtless and without shoes
Now sipping coffee listening the blues 
Feeling brand new tasting some stew


Details | Burlesque | |

Redneck FATHER'S DAY------

***NOTE~TO BE READ WITH A RIDICULOUS "SILKY SOUTHERN DRAWL" (have fun:)***



"Storm over yet...?"

"Well hay'ell ye'ah! 
 woo-hoo!
 sum'body git me a da'gumm cole beer.
 whadda'bou  that boy th'er?
 sum'body git him'a cole beer too!"

"Diddy! that boy ain't nothin' but 8 years old!"

"Wha'choo sayin? 
 wha'th'a?
 na'I don't give a jolly'durn, if he ain't nuttin but 8 year'owed!
 shoot! 
 'dat boy dun' sat him thr'ew a big ol', storm! 
 torna'durr warnin' too!
 he gonna have him'a cole burr;  
 on me!"
 my treat!
 mama, git him'a cole burr! 
 ro'tt now; 
 ya'here?
 besides...
 ta'days father's day!" 



© 2011  ~JSLambert Esquire

   










Details | Burlesque | |

Adam & Eve Inventory Accountants

Adam was an 
acceptable accountant
And Eve a bubblingly 
bright bookkeeper;
Adam loved the 
First-In, First-Out
Accounting (FIFO) system, 
While Eve preferred 
The Last-In, First-Out
Inventory (LIFO) system;  
Together they testified that
Inventoried sweet fruit 
should neither 
Sits and spoil 
nor go to the 
Garden wastebasket 
Wrongfully.


Details | Narrative | |

THE RICHEST HERITAGE OF HUMANKIND

Literature was pursued
by the greatest individuals who ever lived,
and they left us works of unsurpassable wisdom;
human emotions have always been the same, 
and this can't attest to the fact that they will not change anytime soon,
but the freer we are, the further we go up in our balloon.


The richest heritage of Humankind
is found in the written word, which is heard often and not really understood;
where would we be today without the plays and sonnets of Shakespeare that were quite sad,  
or Dante's famous canto, not excluding superb works by modern writers?...
During the dark ages, monks translated books from Greek and Latin into common languages;
as the barbarians destroyed everything found in their path, civilization did not end.


Tragedies of famous people attracted the lucrative minds of poets who had heard of them,
thus embellishing them with their vivid imagination and present actual facts...I follow in
their poetic footsteps, writing down stories that have recently happened, or occurred
before I was born; and with ideas as interesting as theirs, I continue in that tradition
without envying their unaging expressions and distinguished style, but by aggrandizing them.


Literature has finally found its merited place in History, unlikely a hundred years ago,
more people are voraciously reading, and keeping the writers busy by admiring
their sensational works, making comments of encouragement to boost up their optimism;
and to theaters they go and spent an entire night to listen to drama and satire...to scoff,
laugh, or cry when emotions intensify by the sconces of the electric lights; and cheering,
they applaud the richest heritage of Humankind on stage, and are captivated by its scenario.



Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Bio | |

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.


Details | Limerick | |

Black Friday

<                     ladies ~ gentlemen ~ start those ...... engines
                         miss  ~ Ho ~ down - prices .... would be a sin
                                        best buy - circuit city
                                   black ~ friday .... how pitty
                        5 am ~ now ~ who ~ wears ~ smiling ... grins 





                          k- mart ~ wal - mart ~ target ~ pennys
                              red tag sales of many and plenty
                                 but you must buy in bulks
                        and ~  get ~ guy ~ like ~ the ... hulk
                to ~ push ~ cart ~ while ~ you ~ chat ~ with ... jenny




                         let's ~ all ~  hop ~ on ~ over ~ to ~ I - hop
                         your one stop for christmas breakfast slop
                                sure pancakes sounds yummy
                                     but wait till hits tummy 
                                 be sitting on stool till it plops




Entry For
Carolyn Devonshire's
Commericialized Holiday Humor Contest
Gl All And Happy Holidays
Love Kathy & Jenny


Details | Free verse | |

THE WITCHES' BALLET

In late October the reddest moon didn't change its phase,
it remained in the same spot to watch the witches' ballet;
the loud music matched the mood of the mystical night: tambourines
and flutes frantically played; sneers, jeers, giggles of the ugliest witches
mixed with the goblins' roars while they danced around a huge, hot fire.


I smelled a foul odor, the wild dogs feasted on a bloody oar,
" Leave some for us, or we'll turn you into bats! "
the hunched witch snarled with menacing eyes,
but they roared and threatened her with sharp teeth,
then Olga began to speak Latin words to cast  
a spell on them and before it worked, they fled.


Glad that they had left, she dragged the dead animal
and hung it on a long rod to roast on the sparking fire;
hungry witches continued to dance with forks and knives 
in their hands, anxiously waiting for their Halloween treat.  



Written by Andrew Crisci
for Russel Sivey's contest,
" The Ultimate Halloween Contest "
10/5/ 2012


Details | Limerick | |

Deal Or No Deal

<                             Once was a gal shopped all garage sales
                               Nuts ~ bolts ~ screws ~  all found in one big pail
                               Husband said had nice rack
                               Wife turns ~ gives him.... good smack
                               Loaded - buckshot - and - boy - did - he .... wail 



Written by
Katherine Stella 
9/8/2012                              
                             
Entry For
Skat's
A Poets Garage Sale
GL ALL


Details | Lyric | |

Country Boy, City Slicker On CD

Well, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
Loaded my truck, found a place, and here I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand,

And I've been learnin' how to use a computor,
How to do some picture takin' with a cell phone,
How to get insurance for my truck and motor scooter,
But city life is nothing like back home,

Because where I come from, they call it the boonies,
Dirt roads, back woods, life as country as can be,
Though now I'm mixed in with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I can still plant me a nice little garden,
Though not nearly as big as it use to be,
And still listen to country music, Dolly Parton,
She's on my coffee mug for all to see,

And I still get to do some dear huntin'
For those split tails runnin' 'round here,
And I make sure to keep my truck tuned and runnin'
By way of Auto Zone, or I'd run out of beer,

Yea, I livin' in the hood, straight from the boonies,
It's great be an American and free,
Though I'm mixed in good with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
And I'm doin' the best that I can...
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm just a country boy with a city slicker plan,
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm still a country boy, yea, that's who I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand.


Details | Free verse | |

Conspiracy: Who Killed The Easter Bunny

A crowded table, all suspended in shock 
The sound of the shot dimming to a ‘knock’
Only silence, except for the marching clock
The weapon still smoking; an anonymous glock
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Loud cries arise from the elongated table,
Jack Frost is shocked, the Tooth Fairy unable
To speak whilst Santa is checking the stable
For clues on the erstwhile maidservant Mable
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

They searched for hours, called in C.S.I,
Panic set in, would the children all cry?
Sandman confirmed the bunny had died
Batman suspected somebody had lied
WHO KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY?

Guests were quizzed, interrogations began
The mystery unfolded when Santa Claus ran,
Grabbing the pies, he tried escaping in a van
But was stopped in his tracks by superman
SANTA KILLED THE EASTER BUNNY!


Details | Limerick | |

There Once Was A Young Boy Called Tim

There once was a young boy called Tim,
Who decided the Mersey to swim,
Got in to his knees,
But started to freeze,
So decided it wasn't for him!


Details | Alliteration | |

Banana Boat Bob

<                        Banana ~ boat ~ Bob ~ is ~ a ~ slippery..... Boob
                          Thought ~ that ~  this ~ town ~ lost ~ it's .... groove
                          No ~ spice  ~  no ~  life ~ no  .... nothing
                          Little ~ lost ~ boy ~ now ~ looks ~ for ~ his ~ Lucy's ....  ring


                          When ~ where ~ what ~ or ~ even ......  why
                          I'll ~ inquire ~ insist ~ innovate ~ or ~ even  ..... lie
                          His ~ history ~ of ~ having ~ such ~ big ....... hamstrings
                          Maybe ~ even ~ mighty ~ magical ~ musical ~ fruits ~ and .... greens



                         Or ~ having ~ big ~ over-sized ~ onions ~ olives  ~ and ..... Kiwi
                         screw ~ this ~ he's ~ scum  ~ skewered ~ tossed ~ back ~ to ... sea
                         Poor ~ precious ~ pretty ~  Lucy ~  got .......    pranked
                         Cause ~ curious ~ Bob ~ couldn't ~ control ~ love ~ so ~ he ....  sank

              

                        All ~ alone ~ and ~ now ~ very .... angry
                        Drowing ~ deep ~ in ~ own ~ do-do  ~ droppings .... whopie 
                        Luscious ~ Lucy ~ now ~ can ~ look ~ long ~ and ...... hard
                        For ~ another ~ fast ~ floating ~ free ~ salemens ~ not ~ selling.... lard



Entry For
Linda Marie's
Luscious Love Lingers Contest
G.L. All


Details | Haiku | |

Sunet Strip

<                                  well isn't that swell
                                lost another cool surfboard ...
                                      holy sharks galore



                                        beyond horizon
                                 the sun bids day well ado ...
                                       happy trails to you



                                       top of old smokey
                                  cumulus congestive skies ...
                                    coughing up a storm



                                        excursion riding
                                  using buoyant enforcement ...
                                      to capture the sun



                                       yacht and small vessel
                                  endlessly floats rippled lake ...
                                       feeling abandoned                                   
                                                            


Details | Monoku | |

Alien-nation

One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.


Details | Light Poetry | |

One Night in Stroud

I stumbled drunkenly through Stroud
Passed the kebab van on the hill,
When all at once I saw a crowd
Of ladettes – taunting the old bill;
Just for a lark, just for a wheeze,
Flirting and dancing, dressed to tease.

Bedecked with bling, drinking cheap wine,
A clowder of cats out to play,
Perfume and bags by Calvin Klein
All you can eat slapper buffet.
Looking for violence not romance,
Tossing the V’s in fighting stance.

The plods approached askance, as they
Ignored them and crouched down to pee;
The deluge nearly washed away,
The council’s prized floral display! 
I gazed – amazed - at just how short;
Their skirts were and indeed how taut.

Often now – I sit down and cry
(Sometimes it puts me off my food) 
When I recall what I did spy
The female form so crass and rude;
Those harpies in search of cheap thrills,
Stooped - pissing on the daffodils.



(apologies to Mr Wordsworth)


Details | Rhyme | |

The Soup Hall of Fame

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION


Details | Free verse | |

Thunderstruck Sunshine

The clouds shook
A thick, black, very wet blanket out
In the Southeastern quadrant 
Of the New Mexico firmament,
Complete with lightning
And growling, crackling,
Massive basso-profundo sound effects,
Inviting the sun to rest,
Take a load off, 
Reeellaaaxxx! 

Abrasively radiant,
Helios glared a brilliant, heated, passionate,
Steamy smile
Into the arid monsoon skies

And refused Storm’s invitation
To lie down and go to bed


Details | Verse | |

When Grandma takes me to the park

When Grandma takes me to the park!
By Kim Mosteiro
I love when my grandma comes and picks me up to go to the park. We ride in
grandmas car to the park; and grandma sometimes stops on the way and we get ice
cream.......
I like sliding down the slide; grandma waits at the bottom and catches me, or
sometimes she will slide down with me. One day I was swinging, and grandma
pushed me way high, I flew as high as the birds do, it was so much fun!
Grandma taught me how to climb a tree, just like she did when she was little, and
climbed her grandma's tree, to pick apricots for her Grandma's pies! Grandma
pushes me real fast on the merry-go-round; I go round and round and round and it
makes my head dizzy, and then I spin around just like the merry-go-round.
One day we saw a butterfly, it was blue and brown; I chased it and tried to catch
it but it got away. Grandma told me that every time I saw a butterfly, it would
mean that she was thinking about me; and she gave me a kiss and said that's what
it would feel like if a butterfly landed on my nose and kissed me!
But there was one day when Grandma took me to the park and I saw a snake, it
was scary when he shook his tail and it rattled. Grandma said I am to never go
near one and try to pick it up because it can hurt me, it's not like a butterfly. A
snake will bite you and make you sick Grandma says, so I will only chase butterfly's
not snakes.
I can't wait to go to the park again and see what new adventure Grandma and I
will go on.
“Dedicated to my Grandchildren: ADAM, ROSIE, SERENA


Details | Free verse | |

Roll Call

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION








Details | Limerick | |

Let's Get Ready For Some Football

<                                   let's get ready for some football .....    Ya !
                                     Eagles   verses    da   .....   Bears   Well ... then  Hey !       
                                     Here's kickoff ~ by     da .......    Bears
                                     Ohhhhhhhh !  fell  off ....  T  .....    Unfair
                                     Second  ..... blocked  .....  Eagles    7 - Nay !


                                                                      
                                     
                                     
                                    

                                    
Entry For 
Linda Marie's 
Let's Limerick Contest
G.L. All    



Tribute To Football


Details | Couplet | |

Sexy Kiss

We share a look from across the room and I saunter into your arms,
No matter how hard I try to defy, I can never resist your charms;

You slip a hand behind my head and drag me into your kiss,
You tantalize my senses as I lose myself to bliss;

Desire takes over my body as you take my breath away,
We stand in utter silence, we’ve nothing left to say;

There is an overpowering smell of whiskey and cheap perfume,
But locked in a passionate kiss, we’re alone in the crowded room;

Your kisses taste so potent, I savor the exotic flavor of you,
Your intoxicating to my senses, like the sweetest morning dew;

Wrapped in a fervent embrace, our bodies meld to form one;
I lose myself to you and it’s only just begun...


Details | Haiku | |

Harvest Festival

aerial viewing
outstretched crows flying frenzy
harvest festival


Details | Free verse | |

A Simple Southern Christmas

It's gonna be a simple southern Christmas here.
All I want from Santa is some egg nog, bourbon and beer.
I'm gonna wait on Santa Christmas Eve night,
and when he's not lookin' I just might,
steal his reindeer.
It's gonna be a simple southern Christmas here.
I'm sending out my Christmas cheer.
I'm gonna sit on my front porch swing and sing.
It will be a good thing to hear those jingle bells ring.
I thought I seen Santa on the backwoods bayou road,
but instead it was a big fat toad.
It'a a wonderful simple southern Christmas here.
Santa just brought me some egg nog, bourbon, and beer.
When he wasn't lookin' I stole his reindeer.
So now I can deliver my Christmas cheer.
But hurry, hurry, I'm in a rush,
got to give that reindeer a little push.
Got to go, got to go,
got to get home to fix my gumbo.
It is Christmas day,
and I'm in  a rush I must say.
It's gonna be a simple southern Christmas here.
Just add egg nog, bourbon and beer.
Mix it up with some Christmas cheer.
I'm ready for Christmas every year.


Details | Acrostic | |

The Glades

<                                Better grab out the coco-butter
                                  Even those designer shades
                                  All hearts will begin to flutter
                                  Cause were off to the glades
                                  Hear me right for I did not stutter
                                  Best hurry up before the sun fades
                                  Look for keys later father did utter
                                  All aboard now we got it made
                                  Nothing like ocean's viewing I rather smother
                                  Knowing once again to return upon it's raid
                                  Each and every year oh my brother
                                  Think I will even bring the poor old maid
                                  Because she's like no other
                                  In her class she passes the grade
                                  Now get your head out of the gutters
                                  Grow up cause noone is getting laid
                                  Oh my goodness good crothers



Written by Katherine Stella
Entry For Linda Marie's
Beach Blanket Bingo
Acrostic Contest
G.L. All


Details | Rhyme | |

You Little Stinker Devil's Echo

In forest you'll hear squak squak squak
May capture bears play
Or foxes cock-eyed walk walk walk
Down by waters bay

High in trees you'll hear owls owls owls
Just more feathered friends
But I love water fowls fowls fowls
So let's not this end


Miss Hood cried big bad wolf wolf wolf
I just stared and laughed
Seeing deer prints from hoofs hoofs hoofs
Think she's needs skunks bath



As many stanzas as you like.The last 3 words of each 8 syllable line are the same, to create the echo. These can be 1 or 2 syllable words, so long as the line is 8 syllables long. Syllable Count......8.5.8.5. etc.
Rhyming Sequence.......a.b.a.b. c.d.c.d. e.f.e.f. etc.



Details | Couplet | |

Coco For Ten

<                               Coco was his name
                                 Spider monkey all the same

                                Dad worked for zoo
                                Feeder of Coco too


                               Brought the little guy home
                               Boy did Coco love to rome


                               Droppings here and there
                               Mom  covered up his dairy - air

   
                               Shoulders he did seek
                               Knocking  younger ones off their feet


                                Bananas and salted nuts
                                Made Coco dance and strut

                               
                               Each day a animal of new
                               Dad brought home from the zoo

             
                               But the one I'll remember the most
                               Was coco who shared my daily toast





Tribute To 
Como Park Zoo
St Paul Minnesota

Coco And Daddy




Can You Imagine
A Monkey Playing
With 10 Kids  LOL

                                 


Details | Sonnet | |

Kiss This

<                              master of disguise menacing havoc
                                I fear not your pronged fork and wooden stick
                                but one illuminates from presents sight
                                tis I carries master key whom ends plight


                               brushstroke if must with your evilness twist
                               for I stand strong from an Hevenly bliss 
                               poke and probe away with your woven schemes
                               tis I'll be the one laughing though it seems 


                               your inferno fire from gates of hell
                               diminished by just one shake from this bell
                               so bring on your barriers and good grief's
                               tonight I'll be the one with good night's sleep 


                               sowing not fear of satin's smitten grasp
                               but turning check telling to kiss thy ass




Entry For
Thvia Shetley's
The Devil Made Me Do It
Sonnets Only Contest
G.L. All


Details | Rhyme | |

SOUP Spoonin'

Online tonite
looks like 
a whole lotta' spoonin'
goin' on in the "Soup"

nosin' around the comment coral
I see love 
amongst the group

yessir'...
hot Soup!
stirred 
not shaken
marriage scent in the air
no fakin'

where it leads...
we shall see
I know some 
are dippin' crackers in the "Soup"
but Lawd' knows 
IT AIN'T ME!~


Details | Limerick | |

Miss Priss

<                           once there was a boss we called miss priss
                             like to give orders with snap of wrist
                             file fax make coffee
                             phones radio golly
                             when not looking I blow her big hiss


Details | I do not know? | |

Softer Toilet Paper

In this bathroom of Dr. Heath's,
The tissues so tough you grit your teeth.

No soft toilet paper anywhere to be found,
By the time you get through, how does Charmin sound?

You wipe with sandpaper til you bleed,
Soft toilet paper your bottom will need.

In this kit, relief  you will find
From toilet that is much more kind!


Details | Rhyme | |

Hairy Aging

In some places I have no hair
In some places I have more hair
My eyebrows are getting more bushy
And so is my big fat old tushy

To the mirror I look with great fear
As nose hair grows longer and queer
Getting rid of it causes me pain
Nasal hair in me causes no gain

The top of my head is so bare
I'm getting to think life's not fair
To comb it to one side is silly
I feel like a silly willy dilly

In some places I have no hair
In some places I have more hair
My eyebrows are getting more bushy
And so is my big fat old tushy 

© 2013 Rick Zablocki
PD's Silly Poem Contest


Details | Monoku | |

Heartbeat Is A Love Beat { Broken Monku }

<                 seventh grade third hour spelling teacher
             

                                    heartbeat is just a silly love beat








Tribute To
Teenage Crushes
On Teacher's LOL


Details | Verse | |

How The West Was Won

<                         O ye how the west has gone won
                           now wipe those trails of tears my son
                           dance the ring of fire for fun
                           speak and learn native ways
                           learn not to speak with riffles gun
                           rustle bacon beans  Hey !






Written By Katherine Stella 7/3/11


Entry For Dr Ram's 
Rime Couee's Contest
G.L. All


Details | Limerick | |

Trader Joe

<                           once there was a man named trader Joe
                             could do nothing with hair so let grow
                             under big coonskin hat
                             fleas tick and his pet rat
                             mercantile's just say Oh Hell No


                            once there was saloon name lucky spur
                            where traders brought in their hunted furs
                            in walks old trader Joe
                            miss Molly said let's go
                            now both itch scratch from leftover burrs


Details | Lyric | |

A Pub-ng We Go

Hey, Ho! A pub’ng we go… And I’ll bring along, those Zany Trolls.
What’s better, than to drink, with friends, my Dear… as merrily, off we go!

We’ll leave the frats, in the dust, and bring The Bun, merrily, along.
He had a great run, at Easter time, now he can let, the good times roll.
Who knows best, than a nest of Trolls, how to have, a really great time!
A Biker Bar should fill our sails, as we go, courting the best… of it all.

Hey, Ho! A pub’ng we go… And I’ll bring along, those Zany Trolls.
What’s better, than to drink, with friends, my Dear…as merrily, off we go!

The beers great, the girls’ first rate, I’ll ride a full-blown Harley Hog.
To ride them down, across the town, my hair, flowing behind, in the air.
But first we’ll make a new drinking song, betting on, who’s best, by far.
Biker Dudes, Trolls enthused, raise their mugs in unity, again, once more!

Hey, Ho! A pub’ng we go… And I’ll bring along, those Zany Trolls.
What’s better, than to drink, with friends, my Dear… as merrily, off we go!

It’s all fun, as with pool cues in hand, we try to, learn to play Eight Ball.
We’ll dance on the floor, and some on the bar, as rowdier we become.
But we’re the best, with glass in fist, as we sing our new… drinking song.
So don’t be glum! Here, come along, to laughter amid, such joyful fun.
 
Hey, Ho! A pub’ng we go… And I’ll bring along, those Zany Trolls.
What’s better, than to drink, with friends, my Dear… as merrily, off we go!

We’ll have fun, then move along, as our song wins, and the tab is yours.
You can join, as comes, the next bar, and we’ll, start all over, once more!
It’s party time, until dawn, for Trolls can hold, great quantities of rum.
As drinking games come, we win every time, as the losers pay the bill.

Hey, Ho! A pub’ng we go… And I’ll bring along, those, Zany Trolls.
What’s better, than to drink, with friends, my Dear…as merrily, off we go!

(A drinking song for the pure fun it: sung like a pirate song clinking mugs.)


Details | Narrative | |

THE YOWAH ADDICTION

Midst the mulga and the gidyea out beyond the old Paroo 
runs a road which leads to Yowah and a great place it is too. 
Where the populace is smitten by an urge they can’t withstand: 
Its the lust to find the queen of gems, beneath a timeless land. 
 
With her tantalising beauty and her taunting, twinkling eyes, 
Its the radiance of this desert child her lovers highly prize. 
Suitors come from every walk of life, from countries quite diverse 
and she keeps them courting tirelessly exacting quite a purse. 
 
And the charm of her charisma casts a spell they can’t escape, 
so they’ve built a little township there amid that red landscape. 
Quite relentless is their quest to toil,  a constant ritual, 
and they love their leisure moments like their Opal Festival. 
 
Chris and I were asked to join them and present our bush verse show 
through the festival proceedings and replied, “We’d love to go.” 
First we entertained the children at the school there for a spell 
then our host, Gwen Burney, took us for a tour that went down well. 
 
We were shown the local opal fields and dug for Yowah nuts, 
then we lunched and watched some golfers sink some rather dubious putts. 
But the opal bug had bitten and we sought a licence out, 
for we planned to do some noodling or at least just poke about. 
 
But the torture of the digging with just handpicks proved too tough 
and we chucked the towel in quickly as we’d simply had enough. 
Down in spirits we decided to search out the mulberry wine 
there at Roy’s, not far from Gwen’s place, which was said to be real fine. 
 
After scoffing down a sample we were feeling mighty good 
and old Roy was sympathetic to our plight and understood. 
He produced a bar and shovel and a bottle of his brew, 
then we headed back to noodle with our outlook all anew. 

Well we dug and sipped and dug and sipped, oblivious to pain 
and the next two days we carried on and did it all again. 
We were up each morning early and sat cracking all our nuts, 
though our hands were full of blisters and a mass of little cuts.  
 
We were both now surely smitten and could not resist her will, 
for the bug had surely bitten and we talk about it still. 
Yes, its tantalizing colour and its taunting texture’s fine   
and we’re flamin' well addicted to Roy’s home-made mulberry wine. 



Details | Limerick | |

Twelve Seconds

<                    Once was a bartender named Louie
                      Thought my tales story was quite screwy                                     
                      Asked how many seconds
                      Was in year he reckons
                      Twelve shouted out by cousin dewey







Entry For
Confession To A Bartender


                                  


Details | Verse | |

The Paparazzi Quinzaine

<                                   paparazzi candid shots
                                     privacy act ruined ?
                                     big nuisance ?
                                     
                                     


Details | Limerick | |

Just Wait Until I Get Home

<                        once popped cork on bottle of red wine
                          hit brother in eye oh how it did shine
                          seen him go pick up bat
                          boy did I ever scat
                          right to canadian's boarder line

                          feeling like her dansel in-distress
                          along came three county mounties best
                          asked if nipping bottle
                          at fast paces throttle
                          answered yes now did I pass your test


                           tossed in pokie for now twenty days
                           poor ole missy now won't and get laid
                           darn brother wins again
                           wearing smitten hugh grin
                           wait until that welt begins to fade  




Written 6/20/11

Entry For Francine Robert's
Bottle Of Wine
Limericks Only Contest
G.L. All


Details | Couplet | |

AC in Arizona

Lord only knows how the settlers survived
When in Arizona's desert they arrived

I visited there in late November
And the piercing heat I still remember

Air conditioning's great invention
Brought to this state renewed attention

The population grew by leaps and bounds
Many homes were built on the sandy mounds

"There's no humidity," some still will say
Yet none survive without AC each day



(AC stands for air conditioning)


Details | I do not know? | |

A DRUNK DAY

nice clothes
nice shoes
couple of girls
but i got a main boo

nice car
on 22's
lift kit on it
it's another 4in boost

hop out
see my homies
it ain't my forte
but all them smoking

big whip
car full
been drinkin since 1
n yet we still partying

fitted cap
yankee logo
girls say im fly
now they reaching for my "you know"

wake up
hangover
a hurricane went through the house
thanks mr Hugo

team liqour
super sick
i know i was texting
but dont remember this chick

she mad
im laughing
she says im an asshole anyways
i say i'm sorry but it was just another drunk day


Details | Haiku | |

Your Going Down

<                           beneath waterfall
                        let your troubles wash away ... 
                             cesspool is waiting





Entry For John Freeman's
The Precept Natures Haiku
G.L. All


Details | Quatrain | |

Long Live Love

A toss of the head
A flick of her hair
The wave of her hand
As her beauty did flare
 
Her bountiful step
The spring in her stride
Her laugh as we waked 
Hand in hand through the tide
 
Her mouth with its smile
As we wrote in the sand
Her cries of frustration
As sea coated the land
 
Those little I love yous
Meant so much back then
That on annual vacations
We repeat them again
 
For least we forget 
In the daily ado
Our marrital vows
Mean forever I do


Details | Quatrain | |

A STYLE OF ATTRACTIVENESS

Young and middle-aged ladies, who wear sundresses
when summer days sizzle, make the opposite sex notice 
how lovely and sexy their soft skin is;  curious guys,
of course, can't help staring at them...not once but twice!  


Watch them chatting on a bench of a park,
or just strolling down a busy street...
pushing their baby's stroller in the July's heat;
come closer to hear their silly talk!


Jan, my niece's friend, attracts me like no lady ever can,
she wears a colorful sundress she made herself,
and she talks funny to make everybody laugh;
some thinks she's crazy, but I'd love to be her man! 


Many women go to great lengths to get one of these...
the one that makes them stand out and get winks
from men who are easily distracted in the baseball's field:
they wish their wives looked like that...more strength they'd yield!



Fashion models draw admirable glances from an applauding crowd,
but they wear sundresses for recognizition, not for their soulmates;
so ordinary ladies wear them to find that ideal boyfriend or husband,
and admit among yourselves that it is a style of attractiveness!


Written by Andrew Crisci
for Constance La France's contest, " The Sundress. "


Details | Free verse | |

KOOKABURRAS

Kookaburras
are found in Australia,
they are not pretty birds
with a lovely call,
but racous enough
to mistake it 
for laughter, or even screams of amusement.


Kookaburras
love to ride kangaroos,
and sometimes
they hang on their tails,
so they make them run faster than tigers...
to scare the Tasmanian wolves away
resting on sun-dried hummocks of fresh excavations.


Kookaburras 
scorn puling children,
the ones who are spoiled
enough to get what they want
by not eating pumpernickel,
but demand white bread...
watch the hungry kookaburras devour everything!


Details | Rhyme | |

And Goliath Said

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION


Details | Limerick | |

Just For Kicks

<             just like football i am like the queen
               now hand over remote or i'll scream
               black and blue division
               on my television
               Kicking Jay Cutlers butt I do dream









Entry For
Kristen Bruni's 
Football Contest
G.L. All


Details | Limerick | |

You're Going To Get It Now But Good

<                             once there was an old cat named chessur
                               only listened to alice for sure
                               but sometimes dissappeared 
                               and left behind grins smear
                               so I've gone mad and shaved off hides fur





Entry For Debbie Guzzi's
Go Ask Alice Contest
        G.L. All


Details | Free verse | |

My strange Village

I live in a very small very old village
In England where everyone knows your name
But what makes the place rather odd
Is the locals who are very strange.

There's Gina the window cleaner
Her bum the size of mar's
And Lady Quinn
Who drives like a mad lady
In her Bentley car
There's old Doctor Mckenna
Who always complains that he's ill
And young pregnant sally who forgot 
To take the pill (again)
Farmer Giles and his sheep
Tom the butcher boy who walks around naked 
In his sleep
Norris and Horace
the identical twins
And gambling Fred who backs the horses
and never wins
Old Nelly at the post office
And Nora who has the local shop
And P.C plod the nervous local cop.

They all get together on a Friday night
In the local pub and get merry and gossip
For it's the communities hub
Many tales have been told
About a Headless horseman
hereabouts who rides through the village
around midnight when the lights go out.

Headless horseman?
It makes no sense to me
Because if he was riding a horse
How the hell would he see.

Every year we have the village fete
and people from all around cue up at the gate
we used to have a morris dance
But morris can't dance no more
Because Morris hung up his clogs
When his feet got very sore
There's Mollies stall of home preserves
And paddy and his performing fleas
That leaves everyone scratching
And heading for the trees.

The old church stands on top of the hill
and long after the bells have rung
Your ears are ringing still
When anyone does something wrong
they have to face the old ducking pond
I've been ducked a time or two
And got completely wet through.

It's claimed Robin Hood
Met maid Marion in our local wood
Bet they were up to no good
And his merry men got really merry 
Down at the local pub.

If you ever visit us at our village
Hogs bottom's end
We might be a bit strange but we'll greet you like a friend
But be wary
Many a visitor never leave
And meet a grizzly end, ha ha ha haaaaaa.



Peter Dome.copyright.2014. July.


Details | Free verse | |

Pizza

Thin, hand tossed, or pan.
Pepperoni pizza?
Join me if you can.
Dine-in, buffet, or on the run,
pizza for lunch is so much fun.
Taco pizza will hit the spot.
This pizza kitchen sure is hot!
Yes, dessert pizza made just right.
Chocolate chip pizza is such a delight.
Extra meat and light on the sauce.
Join me for pizza at a low cost.
On a diet?
That's okay.
Veggie pizza fixed your way.
Some like it hot and some like it cold,
but I like mine spicy and bold.
Order to go or dine with grace.
Join me at the pizza place.


Details | Limerick | |

I Love Lucy

<          once there was a redhead gal name lucy
            now skit comes to mind is real juicy
            job switching with the men
            conveyer belt takes a spin
            chocolate oh how did she loosey



Entry For Shani Fassbender's
Favorite Television Show / Episode Remembered


I Chose I Love Lucy
 

Written By Katherine Stella 7/1/11


Details | Rhyme | |

Reflection in a Paris Cafe

French madamoselles Favorite harmonica  music Cafe 
Perfectly poised coifferd perfumed elegantly  sipping  in
Floral velvet suit gloves hat matching shoes+handbags
Sitting    gossipping   giggling  intoxicating  atmosphere 
Exclusive   Famous  impressionist  artists   french  cafe
Gladly accomodates  all  dogs  from  first class owners
 Pink diamonde studded chihuhaua , Lola+pink poodle
Huge bulging eyes wet little nose snubs all doggy bags 
Pink poodle ,Pepe patiently  waits to order chicken pate
Waiter white apron whips pencil behind ear Anticipation
Accepts  her envelope on  small silver tray + huffs away


Details | Senryu | |

House of WEED

Aromas, green, sweet
Enter through doorway now 
S—sick horror can’t breathe 


Details | Rhyme | |

Hurry Home

My dear,
As I'm lying on your pillow here

I pray for God to watch over you each night
And help guide you through your daily plights

I can hear sounds of wispiring winds
And see through window's pane a mighty stars spin

Just knowing your battling on foreign soil
Over someone else's turmoils

Makes me just love you that much more
But please hurry home hun to finish your own dam choirs

                                          Love 
                                                Kat
                                                Meowwwww LOL



Tribute To Our Troops And Loved Ones
Hurry Home
God Bless U.S.A.

Also Entry For Brian Strand's 
My Dear Contest


Details | I do not know? | |

The Art Of Wondering

The Art Of Wondering 

Another wonderful discovery.  I had it all the time.  But I didn’t know it was mine. Maybe 
it slipped my mind.  You can do it for a moment or for a day. 

Doing it to long, can cause harm.  I discovered it when I was young.  Sometimes I think 
it’s dumb. 

Wondering can be Wonderful.  But one must certainly be mindful, when enough 
wondering is truly enough. 

Now that I am older, I use caution.  I realize to much, could cause one to be mentally 
flakey, stagnated and hallucinated. In other words, no action when there was action?

I guess you are wondering, what in the world am I wondering about? Really? Stop 
wondering about it. I have…  Have a Wonderful Day…  

Dr. "G"


Details | Rhyme | |

Cub Foods { Minnesota }

<                               
                                       Cub Foods  ~  Minnesota



                                  oh that >>> cucumber thinks hes so ..... cute

                                  lying in a  bed of ~  lettuce in his birthday ... suit

                                  along comes >>> carrot and >>> celery to ~ squawk

                                  you may ..... talk .. the .. talk  but can you .. walk ... the ....... walk

                                  just then >>> banana's prices started to ^^^ rise

                                  oh that son of an ~ mango ...... he too was suprised 

                                  nuts ~  and ~ fruits ... was to fancy his ........ plate

                                  poor ole    >>>>>  potato was just to dam ............ late

                                 




Details | Haiku | |

Cry Me A River

at the mouth of cave
aqua insurgent brushstrokes
cry me a river


Details | Rhyme | |

THE DOLLAR FORTY CHIPS

THE DOLLAR FORTY CHIPS 
 
While travelling up to Darwin in the Northern Territory many years back, we pulled 
into Winton in the far north-west of Queensland for a pit stop and refreshments.  
My wife was taken back at the price of some of the items which led to the 
following reflections.

"I'll have some crispy chips please sir," 
The Missus asked the man. 
"Those atomic tomato ones, 
The good old Samboy bran'. 

I guess the bright red packaging 
Sure caught the Missus eye. 
The dollar forty price tag though, 
Near made the Missus cry. 

"How much again?" she asked the man, 
Still reeling from the shock; 
"A dollar forty," old Pete said, 
And scratched his balding block. 

"They're half the price back home you know, 
How come they're so darn dear? 
The flavours not atomic mate, 
Your price is though I fear." 

"I bet that you're a tourist dear," 
Suggested Winton Pete. 
"You're sure to be a coastal kid 
 Who hates the flies and heat." 

"Most spuds down there are local grown, 
Which makes your chips so cheap, 
But if you take a squiz outside, 
You'll see there's only sheep." 

"You try and dig the ground out there, 
It's more than just a task, 
So if you want them chips my dear, 
One forty's what I ask." 


Details | Free verse | |

The Eternal Infernos of Pain

Front and Center!
Those Gates adorned with pearls in Heaven.
White angels soaring. 

If by chance, 
Ordered to enter;
Through St. Peter's Permission; 
I demand from you chancellor; 
A swift insanity plea, submission. 
For this troubled soul is plagued, 
By vast displays of wicked ways. 

None lost. 
Courtesy of meticulous examination. 
Love lost. 

Diligence pending Investigation. 
Key Evidence, perpetually documented 
In Sin's ominous catalog. 
Rebuke my Judge! 
For multitudes of shortcomings, 
He failed to ascertain. 

Moreover, present was He, 
When Satan drafted me. 
First round,
Pick three.
His Fantasy League...
"The Eternal Infernos of Pain" 

JS Lambert



Details | Light Poetry | |

On a Day Like Today

On a Day Like Today
    by Amy Swanson 12/2008


On a day like today,
    I just want to scream.
This day is so cold!
    I'd much rather day-dream...

...of a small tropic island
     where sun always shines -
Yes!  That would do nicely!
      (though just in my mind)

On a hot sandy beach,
       where the water's deep blue;
relaxing and warm,
        with palm trees in my view...

and a drink in my hand,
     with that little umbrella!
My warm, leisured day
      would read like a novella...!

But I open my eyes -
      drat! this dull winter gray!
I prefer my day-dreams
      on a day like today!   :)


Details | Couplet | |

Beyond the Pleasant Hill

Was just a walk beyond the road -- a shortcut past the bog,
No different than the night before but this night there was fog.
I climbed the pleasant hill from which the ‘yard had got it’s name,
So cold and dark it was that night, a dim light I did flame.
Blackest of the blackest eve’s I thought I might go blind,
So quickly paced, I past the stone’s of relatives that died.
Just past the breeze that got the willow shaking in the night
I saw someone just standing where my path comes into sight --

I wondered why tonight they’d chosen 
To walk the same path I was roamin’
A closer look, not man nor woman…
So still -- as if their form was frozen…
 
“They must be lost“, I thought out loud, no light to find the path,  
So maybe they’re just standing there awaiting someone’s laugh.
Or maybe they are frozen stiff by seeing my form too --
I couldn’t move though,  be it  just another passing through
My flashlight though, so dim, was shining on them, so it seemed…
…No looking up, no squinting eyes or arms to hide the beam,
How could they not have noticed me, the light is right upon them?
And just as I brought down my hand to light the way  so trodden…

I heard them move in front of me
That form that stood beside the tree
A quick response I shone the light
Back at the path ahead in fright
No person was still standing there…
Just Trees, beyond the path I dared --

I stood there for eternity a-gasp and scared to death,
Staring hard upon that spot where someone drew their breath.
They’re somewhere past the beam of light that’s dimming by the second --
The eerie melody from lonely crickets only beckoned.
A sudden crackle at my feet as if one stopped behind,
I felt my heart beat through my chest, I thought I’d lost my mind.
I thought I felt a windy chill then whisper past my ear,
But turned to shine my light upon no stranger standing near.

That instant -- I had dropped my bag and ran towards the gate,
I swore I heard them running too I had no time to waste.
So as I reached the entrance, looking back I think I said, 

“If you’re still there, I’ve changed my mind, I’ll take the street instead.”


Details | Rhyme | |

Illusions

Cough and splutter in a crowded room. A juke-box is playing another dreary tune. Lonely man feeds a bandit spending next week's rent Woman sits at bar smothered in make-up and scent. Young men at pool table in torn and holey jeans Are shouting in unison about favourite football teams. Soon elephants are pink leprechauns are green, Unreality is the truth that we have seen. Cold cold beer brings on the confusion It's the outside world that is now an illusion.
This is a sort of parody. Based on a Moody Blues section on one of their albums. Think it was just before or after one of the songs. Called Late Lament. Thought I'd better credit it any way just in case anyone points it out.


Details | Rhyme | |

I Am A Displaced Scouser

I am a displaced Scouser,
Who comes from Bootle way,
And no matter where I go,
A Scouser will I stay.

I eat my chips on Butties,
Or perhaps upon a barm,
I get by on old Scouse wit,
And on my Liverpool charm.

But I’ve never owned a tracksuit,
It’s simply not my style,
And I’m not a football maniac,
Or have a police file.

So remember that you can’t believe,
All that people say,
About us lowly Scousers,
Who come from Bootle way.


Details | Rhyme | |

It's Friday

<                                         Is It Friday Yet ?
                                            Yea ~ You Bet


                                            Just Got Paid
                                            Now Want To Get Laid


                                            7 ~ 3
                                            Good Golly

                                           
                                            Boss On  Ass
                                            Like Sharpel Of Glass

                                            
                                            Phones Ringing Off Wall
                                            Everybody And Their Mother Calls

                                            
                                            Fix This Fix That
                                            Phone I just Want To Splat


                                            Tic Tock Tic Tock
                                            Goes Slow On Dam  Clock 


                                           Thursday  -  Monday
                                           All I want To Say


                                            Is It Friday Yet
                                            And No I Can't Afford A Dreamy Jet


                                            So As The Saying Goes
                                            I'll Just Keep Crossing My Fingers And Toes



Entry For
Joe Flach's
In Other Words Contest



My Inspiration 
Is It Friday Yet ?  LOL
G.L. All
                                            


Details | Rhyme | |

A DREAMT EVENT FOR THE NEWLY-WED

A dreamt event
for the newly-wed,
both looking sharp;
how many hand-written invitation cards
have they sent
with the reddest heart and lovely words? 


Down the church isle they will go with a tight-sealed tounge;
an organist will play the famous wedding song...
be ready to greet them with wide smiles,
despite your approval or disapproval, don't show your intent! 
Oh, never try to crash a dreamt event 
for the newly-wed, you may get unpleasant surprises
from that priest or reverend performing the holy matrimony!
Be quite and listen, or don't bother to attend the cerimony!  


Some envious eyes fix their manacing, inappropiate glances
on them...dreaming of what could have been;
why can't anyone openly admit their sin?
Don't be a pretender and continue the dance,
anyone can sense those thoughts of anger
and resentment...why are you looking so ghostly?
Let go of all stupidity and don't use puffery...
congratulate them with a cheerful toast and a hearty laughter!


A dreamt event 
for the newly-wed,...
kissing passionately
without embarassment,
but as others watch with contentment...
the flower girls follow them gracefully 
as they hear the wedding bells at twelve!
 





Details | Haiku | |

My Mom Is One Tough Cookie

deep in the forest
collapsed limbs fungus rockbeds
natures own fury


Tribute To Nature
Even If She Is Mean LOL



Details | I do not know? | |

Professional Divorcé

Lost in emotions
Two souls approaching new path
Bitterness adorned


Forgetting love, possibly they shared.
Reasoning on the fights, they had bared.
Manly disfiguring blow.
So possible you know.
Now departing, both no longer  paired.


Marriages four, divorced three times now in this life of mine.

If another comes my way, next lover shall be a glass of wine..




For
Sponsor (Destroyer ((Poet 
Contest Name ~DIVORCE CLUB~ 


Details | Didactic | |

The Blarney Stone

a didactic poem

When eloquence leaves you a’wanting,
if verbal effluence you’re flaunting,
should your audience appear daunting,
kiss the Blarney Stone.

     I climbed the circular tower,
     reached the hundred ninety-third step, 
     and waded through unhurried queue.

     I trembled with anxiety, 
     gasped for ev’ry uncertain breath,
     and paused to view but then I knew.

     Hidden underneath the rampart
     this infamous bluestone will rest
     I shan’t pursue my lips on blue.

When commonsense says,  “No way”,
if plain prudence seeks delay,
should consequence have its say,
pass the Blarney stone.


6


Details | I do not know? | |

You THINK?

You think you might be in love.

You think he/her might be in love with you.

You think about a lot of things. Do you really know those things?

You think a lot, you worry a lot. 

But do you really HAVE to think or worry about those things?
  Or do you WAN'T to think or worry about those things?

Now that there is something to think about.

 
   

              *please leave a comment if you like it or fav poem if you might*
                                           
                                         -Angel4eva23


Details | Rhyme | |

A Fantasy of Leisure

A dream vacation would be nice
All alone or with a little spice
Me, myself and I or a partner to ride
In the sky or on board
With some spice should I say more
You tour me and I tour you
Better yet let's tour the view
You never know what that can brew
Steamy hot and boiling too
On an island with a beach
Sunny rays no kids to leach
Surrounded with nothing but peace
Better yet surrounded by palm trees
In weather more than eighty degrees
Or better yet a place of sin
More amusing for adults and friends
Las Vegas where the night never ends
Glitzy, bright, casinos, right
A place where you really tend to spend all night
But maybe that's just too much fun
Just too loud with too many crowds
A better fantasy, romantic style
Paris or Italy wouldn't that be wild
A bunch of souvenirs of my fantasy compiled
The Eiffel Tower or the Louvre Museum or a visit to the Notre Dame Cathedral
With so much to see maybe I should bring people
But what ever I do and this might seem evil
I'll bring adults no little people

 


Details | Rhyme | |

Poetry About Poetry

Shades of color bounce within
Singing their hues dancing in place
Vivid lines colored outside
Rules broken with empty space
A midnights dream heard and seen
Gleaming from the twinkle of a eye
Wings touched flown and plucked
Gliding like a bird up in the sky
Wishes from pennies thrown into tears
The reservoir over flowing with pigments of pain
Drowning from the shadows 
The flood paints the day
Words speak volumes of silence hidden
Their sounds blind to what they see
Mirrors of nouns and verbs 
Their meaning and secrets lost at sea
Emotions ruled by laws of language
Spelled in boxes of glass
Melted from sands inside
That voices strangle to grasp


Details | Free verse | |

Down And Out Haiku Slam

<                                          whispers of the wind .........
                                            speak to enchanted sea .........
                                            bp ........  going down


Details | Acrostic | |

Spaceship (acrostic with rhyme)

Spend your hard-earned cash on fuel for takeoff.
Pray that the government does not find out until gone.
Allow your free time for checking weather, not golf.
Case the local food store for dry goods you can con.
Evaluate your water supply needs, no water in cosmos.
Secure a safe place for waste, body waste floats to easy.
Have welding knowledge, so your stored rocket is close.
Internet may bring suspicion making government queasy.
Plan to go up straight in the air, horizontal rockets scare.


Details | I do not know? | |

Four Shining Stars (Dedicated to The Blue Collar Workers)

There are many places in this world
where people tend to go,
to get a really good laugh
from a Great Comedy Show.

But My Friends I say to You
The Place to go is this,
Where you will hear The Famous Line,
"You Might be A Redneck If......."

Next on Stage there comes A Man,
and He Say's "Here's Your Sign",
He makes us laugh time and again,
He simply is Divine.

Then next We ROAR with laughter
From This Line, "GIT - R - DONE",
This Man is simply wonderful,
His Smile's Bright as The Sun.

Up Next there is a Gentleman
that fills Our Hearts with Glee,
He Says, "That Judge just TICKED ME OFF!!!
I was in the bar you see."

These four men are wonderful,
they ALL shine just like the sun,
they fill our homes with happiness,
with laughter and with fun.

And so My Friends I say to you
the next time you feel blue,
Just Think of these Four Shining Stars,
They'll bring A Smile to You.


Details | Couplet | |

The Iowan Walk

"In a land full of corn, you've got to just laugh a little."

The gravel flies out from beneath,
The hicks smile with half their teeth.
The corn grows,
The horses have shows.
Flat paths and lanes lead,
All starting with the soil for the seed.

As country plays on the station,
Under God is our Nation,
Playing close with friendly people,
BINGO tonight or riding the bull.
Views on the Mississippi river,
During the winter we all start to shiver.
Living in a reality world,
The doors are slim but few are curled.

For it's Iowa the seasons come,
The bottles are opened with whisky and rum,
Talk is everywhere about our city,
here there are plenty deer to hit in  pity.

Tractors fly in style,
Come visit and you may stay awhile.
For there's casinos and bars to see,
A castle called Jumers; grab a key.
Viewing beauty from the peer,
The beauty found in every mirror.
The MidWest lives fine,
It opens up glory in one to shine.

The traffic flowss through each town,
On the way through going up and down.
The hills with cows astray,
The nights over; back to the day.
The city people leave for work,
Sending off messages as each is a perk,
Neves lending a need to be,
Opening new things to see.

For it's Iowa the grass grows green,
The people are friendly; not too mean.
The glory of the state is here,
The glory is very near.
Talk and walk the Iowan way,
Come visity and maybe you'll stay!


Details | Verse | |

Timeless

Joanna Davis

Bulging bags, a half eaten bun
Scribbled postcards penned on the run
Victoria station, just two stops away
From the end of another short holiday
Summers over, time to return 
To cooking and cleaning, the list goes on and on
Souvenirs a plenty; a mug of the queen
Galleries and gardens, no sight left unseen
Last hugs and kisses, watering eyes
No time for tears, or long goodbyes
Days we’ll long remember, You and I
Funny how quickly, the time’s flown by
I’ll write you; I promise, a letter each day
Until it’s your turn to come over, and stay


Details | Narrative | |

SEA TO SHINNING SEA

SEA TO SHINNING SEA,
 
...this is so intimate of time, as a first kiss of time is...so close of soul, so near, so dear of heart beat, so precious a rhyme that flows so intimately,
 
deep of time, down by the Crystal Seas...
 
...this is so intimate of dreams,
dreaming reality,
 
as the Crystal Sea so reveals of destinies galore,
sparkles,
destined as the night light of the moon-glows of starry eyes,
upon the waters,
 
...gazing
 
...seeing tranquility upon the waves...
watching to the depth of a dream,
and a sun-rise
 
being so true...
 
for underneath and within this a moon-lit poem of starry night eyes, down by the Crystal Seas, a vessel sets sail upon the deep...into a kiss of dawn...
 
Sea to shinning Sea.
 
mb(2011)
 


Details | Blank verse | |

By The Ocean's Edge

I sit by the ocean’s edge, regarding the 3 shades of blue before me.
As I watch, a reverse cascade bursts to the sky. A low wale and a splash. Gone.
Dolphins, their laughter adorable at the least, bound into the air, only to dive back seconds later. 
Looking over, I see the wise cranes, jumping and bopping to a tune I cannot hear. 
Gulls high above shout greetings to me and their fellows. 
The sun, radiating it’s warmth unto my skin, bright and bold.

This is paradise. But not my paradise. 

…There has to be lemonade. 
Then, and only then, will this be my paradise.


Details | Haiku | |

Blue Russian

fill glass with some ice -
add vodka coffee liqueur -
now splash on the blue


Details | ABC | |

Your Restaurant Gave Me Diarrhea

I ate dinner last night and felt fine 
It was leftovers at 9 
The next day I decided to go out to eat 
I get a rumble in my stomach and begin to feel the heat 
What did i do wrong, ate out tonight 
Now I feel like a crazy bird in flight 
I feel the pressure as I am stuck in a traffic jam in my Kia 
Now I know your restaurant gave me diarrhea 
I make it to the toilet, I sit in the stall 
Plenty available at the Southern Hills Mall 
Too much salt, piss and vinegar 
I begin to feel dizzy, my sight begins to blur 
I am not in the jungle and I am not Sheena 
But facts are facts, your restaurant gave me diarrhea 
My business is finished, I wipe and leave 
I have a runny nose and blow it on my sleeve 
As I depart the john I leave behind a green smog 
The overall experience was too much for the toilet, it clogged 
Good thing there is employees at six dollars an hour 
I get home and take a shower 
Too busy to talk, so I will see ya 
Won't be another customer there, that restaurant gave me diarrhea  
Click  


Details | Light Poetry | |

What A Liar

Eve Rules
  Adam Drools  {Joseph Spence }

My garden
  Beg Your Pardon

Succalant Mango
     Let's Tango

Vineyard
    Man Work Hard

More grapes
   Apples Ate

Bare Essance
   My preference

Why Oh Why
  Did Adam Try


Cause Snaked Lied
   And Humanity Died


Details | Verse | |

Universal Greetings

Saying ‘hello’ around the world
is more than a vocal projection
It’s a movement of lips, swaying of hips,
and at times complete physical expression

Saying ‘hello’ in Asia,
calls for your best leaf of tea
While Europeans make do
with much less conventionally!

For Africans and Caribbean’s alike,
the cordiality of our 'say'...
could make ‘hello’ in the morning,
last until well past midday!
 


Details | Limerick | |

I'm Growing

<                                  economic woes
                                    say it isn't so
                                    fruits vegetables of divine
                                    artificial added such a crime
                                    sow garden  W.T.G     {Way To Go}
                                    
                                    
                                    
                                    
                                    


Details | Free verse | |

You're Going To Die Laughing

I could just imagine Tom 
dancing in the Lord's Kitchen
wearing his Spandex Boxer Shorts
while his other goofy Friends Hammond and Rosie
pose as Vacuum Salesmen 
at a Dire Straits Gig
making Tidbits and poking Wormholes
with their Listerine Soaked Tissue box
Oh I know Tom has to be laughing in sweet Pain
as these two nut cases aboard an U.F.O.
and stay drifting to another brilliant Convention
on  Insomnia and Nuclear Waste Medicine
Bet they end up thinking that  Lunar Craters
is the head cheese in charge 
As they sit to Wine And Dine for free


Details | Rhyme | |

Oxymoronica-THE NAIVE OUTSIDER

New Yorkers are famous for walking too fast,
and it has become a sort of an ethnic trademark;
some may laugh...thinking it's funny, but it's a fact!
An outsider asked a tall, blond policeman near Central Park,
" Why  is everybody running? Is the President coming?"
And the mean-looking cop replied him with an intimidating voice,
" Are you an outsider...doesn't a New Yorker walk faster than any other folk?" 
And the naive fellow exclaimed, " No, I never knew that they raced like horses
to catch a train!"  But the policeman got really angry and yelling
ordered the poor guy, " Run with them...before I'll throw you in jail!"
And ran he did and he didn't have to get on any subway train!
So New Yorkers don't be offended...if I told this horrible joke!


Details | Rhyme | |

Piddlehinton, Et Al

I met a chap in an English pub and asked from whence he came.
"Harumph! I hail from Piddlehinton", he pompously did proclaim!
"And you sir?", he asked and I proudly puffed out my chest.
"I come from Bean Blossom, Indiana, USA, out of the great Midwest!"

With that we guffawed and began a dialogue about curious city names,
Quaffing pints of Guinness along, as we staked outrageous claims.
"Have you heard of Cripple Creek or French Lick?", I reported.
"No! 'Ave you 'eard of Mousehole or Puddletown?", he retorted.

I proffered the names of Bad Axe, Buzzards Bay and a place called Hazard.
He countered with Cockermouth, Muggleswick and a place named Lizard!
"If you visit the colonies stop by Pigeon Forge and Intercourse!"
"While you're 'ere visit Thunderjug and Giggleswick of course!"

He taunted me with names like Liphook, Lickey End and Crackpot,
But I boasted of Eek, Waxahachie, Bunkie and the burg of Jackpot!
He babbled on telling of Beanacre, North Piddle and Balls Cross.
I depleted my reservoir of names - I could only think of La Crosse!

He challenged me to a game of darts - the board was down the hall,
But in my delicate boozy condition, I could hardly see the wall!
I excused myself admitting that in darts and city names he was deft.
He was still muttering Birdlip, Fugglestone and Diddlebury as I left!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved


Details | Free verse | |

Pardon This Page

I reveal these words to the American,
who has the right to pardon this page,
while the whole world's getting out of hand,
as the evils of revelations rage,

Why's the US helping foreign lands?
when it can't get a grip on it's own,
If they intend to make any future plans...
why not start right here at home?

It's nobody's right to invade anywhere;
there's no serious threat here at home,
so send the officials whom send our troops there..
and on the front line with a cell phone,

Yea! parachute them in with a baseball bat,
a cell phone and a roll of duct tape,
One they get to where imposing minds are at...
they can put on their superman cape,

Or, drug them and issue them a used baseball bat,
a walkie talkie and a catchers mitt...
Once they realize where and the heck they're at,
there's a chance they'll resign or quit,

And pardon me if you don' t feel the same,
or believe "just"...........as I do,
but those thousands of humans killed and maimed...
continue growing in numbers too.


Details | Limerick | |

A Drunken Tale

Over lips and through da gums
Hooked minno is going down some
Depth by depth there she sinks
Hooked a dam dogfish oh how that stinks
Pulled anchor and now drowning in rum




Tribute To Fishing
Also Entry For
Carolyn Devonshire's
Sea Tale Limericks
GL All


Details | Blank verse | |

dress revolution

The dress Revolution 
Sometimes the longing for the past is like a constant 
hunger by the underfed. Summers were endless and 
I was the first to wear shorts and sandals in town; 
had bought them in Aruba, coming off a ship going 
home I met my mother and sister, they were shocked
no one dressed frivolous back then. I wore a T. shirt
 too on it was written: “I Love New York.” 
Mother thought I ought to change into long trouser, 
wear a proper shirt, preferable white, and tie, sister 
was impressed though. I loved my youth to be different
from the norm. But time was changing fast, five years 
on everyone wore shorts and had long hair, Jogging in 
the park I was the only one, now you can´t walk for joggers.
I started this revolution, but where is my plaque?  


Details | Rhyme | |

LISA WAS THE VERY FIRST LOVE OF MY YOUTH

Lisa was the very first love of my youth,
even her voice had the sound of a flute;
how funny she looked with those huge, black sunglasses
matching her blue bikini...honestly I had plenty of laughs!


I surely approached like any other boy would,
trying to mentally rehearse my intent...
and finding courage took a planned incident,
which made me conquer her with an insincere word.


"Sorry for messing up your clean blanket,
the hot sand burned my feet and I got mad!"
I humbly said with the tenderest voice to win her favor...   
" No need to apologize. " she replied, touching her red hair.


And suddenly a summer steamy love began...
how delighted and how lucky I was to have gotten away so shamelessly
with my pretense, then she asked me to get off the hot sand
and sit on her blanket to listen to Cher...oh, she longed for her Sonny!


Lisa was the very first love of my youth filled with sensation;
when I open my cluttered closet, a withered carnation, 
she put in my tuxedo jacket, still evokes our last date...
the eighties were a joy to explore with her without any haste.


Details | Free verse | |

Free Range

Often my thoughts do range far and wide.
But it’s not just my thoughts that skim the tides.
When my Hubby asks and I don’t reply…
He says I’m free ranging again with my mind.
He laughs and tells me to please wake up…
But I’ve already been there, thank you, so much.

Deep in thought and so far away,
He’s still my muse in every way.
But once I get going on that thought…
Look out boys, my mind is set and lost
But don’t you worry. No Sireeee.
When the typing slows you’ll know I’m back, you see.

Those free-range chickens have nothing on me…
I way surpass them in productivity.
And as my words free range far and wide
You’ll find… others may be joyfully joining  me for a time.



Details | Free verse | |

Hard Crawl

This sad tale I tell.
Of water with smell,
One day running,
Took hard fall,
Ended in a crawl,
Next smelled the odor,
Looking up and saw,
Outhouse bottom.



1. This
2. Sad
3. Tale
4. I
5. Tell
6. Of
7. Water
8. With
9. Smell
10. One
11. Day
12. Running
13. Took
14. Hard
15 fall
16. Ended
17. In
18. A
19. Crawl
20. Next
21. Smelled
22. The
23. Odor
24. Looking
25. Up
26. And
27. Saw
28. Outhouse
29. Bottom


Details | Couplet | |

Get A Rope

Gun slinger
    Matt Zinger

Dressed in black
     Didn't come back

High Noon
    Was Doomed

Quick Draw
      McGraw

Got A Rope
   Hung that dope

Undertaker Called
    Dead Body Hauled

Poured the whisky
     From Junction 60

Dead Man's Trail
  Where slingers failed









Details | Rhyme | |

MORE SNOW COMING FROM WEST CAROLINA

Side streets, avenues and boulevards
seem fortifications of past civil wars
with piles of ice glistening, and the grime
and dirt from passing cars splash them with slime..


The meteorologist from Eyewitness News grins as he tracks down the January storm
predicting no pleasant, sunny weather or break in clouds tomorrow night;
more snow from West Carolina will arrive to New York Harbor after midnight,
then it will change to ice, rain and sleet....I'll drink plenty of coffee to keep me warm! 


So worried, I called my  pretty niece who's traveling up North,
I told her to drive safely and stop at a gas station to check her tires,
but Claudio will soothe her blues as he hums many happy rhymes,
and lots of stories he will tell me having seen the kids of the South.


Wednesday I will go back to work, having plenty of time to sleep...
to do as I will, but staring at a blackened snow at every curb,
I can't bear the thought that spring is months away and my Ford
is parked between cars that haven't been moved since last week.   


I'm waiting without thrill more snow from West Carolina,
praying for everyone's safety as they cross another borderline...
If I were a kid, I'd build the funniest snowman on my block,
and happily go around it twenty times as a quacking duck!


Details | Quatrain | |

THE DREARINESS OF THIS FRIGID SEASON

Goodbye Fall with all the auburn leaves of the reddest sunset,
goodbye crackling path where I met the last songbirds,
whose melody accompained me to winter's doors;
and with deep sadness I kept on looking back.


Welcome gloomy winter with short afternoons and long evenings;
watching the advancing shadows and loudly hearing
the furious sound of the squall rampaging the stately trees,
and making them weep when the icy rain comes down with lightining. 


Sitting in a rattling, rocking chair, I peruse through pages of sunny places afar,
forgetting the dreariness of this frigid season and be consoled by a warm fire;  
and still nostalgia abounds...thinking of the pleasant strolls of a past season,
which thrilled me with its colors, and through delight I justified my reason. 


O winter, don't linger as you always have...shorten your stay, avoid foul play; 
and could I ever stand a pale sun, hardly giving off with its luminiscence,
in this house hidden among the maples and the pines of a squalid valley?
Old winter, don't mislead me with days without snow...that's utter pretense!


Goodbye explorer fedora hat keeping my dreamer's head cool, 
sparing my skin another ugly wrinkle, allowing late beauty to rule;   
goodbye iced coffee sipped from my Big Apple plastic cup,
which I bought along Fifth Avenue in a crowded, variety shop. 


Ummerciful winter, pity the desperate state I am in,
reduce the wrath of your devastation, step inside and to tell me your amazing tales...
hoping that I will write them down for everyone to read and enjoy for immortal ages;
relentless winter, reduce the dreariness of this frigid season.


Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Couplet | |

Spelunker

Adventures in the underground                 	                                                     
did that grow up or down            		                                                 
Light on my head starring into the dark	     			               
what a funny word to be called as I imbark                                          	              
Could it be because I tread water and guano up to my knees                                      
or the sound I would make if I took a wrong step aiiee             	                
Like an aztec two steps which way do I go  		                                 
looking across the vast pothole                                                                                    
As I am pitching and squeezing back to the top                                                           
I am know speleologist but has any one seen the cave cop                                        
I can see the light of day from this cavern                                                                
maybe next time let's just talk about it at the tavern                                               
For I am filthy and dirty but not the word                                                               
maybe only to a caver if you have not heard


Details | Narrative | |

Satire-HUMOROUS BROOKLYNISM

I'm driving down Eighteent' Avenoo in Bensonhoist,
I am having a wallear for a hero; I jeet
nothin' yet, and metballs sound great
but I don't wanna wait on line...
like deeze nice kids from North Carolina!
I tried to jump the line, but duh big guy...
a mean-looking man yells,
" Get back on line, weisnheimer... I don't like doze
kinda of guys...yuh're just another customer! " 
I am so hungry I could jeet a big cow,
an' wanna give him a piece of my silly mind!
"Oh my god...he makes me mad!"
" Yuh got a lotta nerve, buddy! " I yell back...
" Don't yuh mess with a goomba! " 
" Oh, my god...I sound like doze guys from Duh Sopranos... 
I wanna no drama, just my meatballs hero and go! "  
Duh tall, chubby man stares at me an' says," Listen to me,  
don't yuh tawk to me like dat! "...
" Yuh think...yuh're so special!" I axeya
in a nice way, so go back to the line...an' wait like dey do!...
" Do yuh understand? "..." Someone tell me...whatta I'm gonna 
do with an idiot like dat? "
" Yuh still laugh at me like I am tellin' yuh a whacky joke! " 
He freezes my words...I can't tawk;
and with a huge hero in my hand, I run back to my scash!

Translation:

I'm driving down Eighteenth Avenue in Bensonhurst,
I am having a craving for a sandwich;
I haven't eaten anything yet, and meatballs look great,
but I don't want to wait in line...
like these nice kids from North Carolina!
I try to jump the line, but the big guy,
a mean-looking man looks at me and shouts,
" Get back in line, wise guy...I don't like those kind of guys!"
" You are just another customer!"
I'm so hungry I could eat a big cow,
and I want to give him a piece of my crazy mind,
but the tall, chubby man stares at me and says, 
"Listen to me, don't you talk to me like that!"
"You think you are so special! I asked you in a nice way,
so go back in line... and wait like they do!"...
"Do you understand?..."Someone tell me...what I am going to do
with an idiot like that?..."You still laugh at me like I'm telling you a crazy joke!"
He freezes my words...I can't talk;
and with a huge sanwich in my hand,
I quickly run back to my old-beat-up car!


 Entered in Debarah's Guzzi contest, " Dialects make the world go around "

Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Limerick | |

Holy Crap

Na- Nu Na-Nu
greetings earthlings How do you do
I'm captain Zendor from planet Sur Render 
shazbot someone crashed into my spaceship's fender
hit me so hard made me go krap-poo


Details | Limerick | |

FUN AT THE BEACH

There's a ripped, good looking guy...
gals, don't assume he's quite and shy!
Watch how he models:
he flexes his muscles...
winking at ladies strolling by!


Details | Narrative | |

Sonnetina Sequence-THE RIPE ORCHARDS

September has come
and the ripe orchards
abundantly display their delicious fruits:
peaches of delicate rose,
and cherries of deep red!
Teens, with their empty baskets, 
anxiously run to pull them 
off the drooping branches;
and one of them yells,
" I have gotten the first one! " 



What a gleeful celebration for youngsters 
about to return to loved-and-hated school
with their band-new and heavy backpacks;
and they will write about these harvest's moments,
and wait with exciting eyes how their writings
will be scored by their teacher, and if someone 
should cheat, points will be taken away...so kids,
squash your curiosity and kindly behave!
All of them did their best in writing poems without rhyme,   
poems of a harvest with an aroma so fine!



The hot afternoon reddens the faces
of all the experienced fruit-pickers,
and these struggling young ones
can't speed up to their pace!
" Hurry, Jack...let Susan help
you with your over-loaded basket...
everyone has finished picking and gone! "
What a humorous remark that
even makes the sullen and tired sun 
smile...when his duty is coming to a sudden end!
 


Happily they trot out of the orchards, singing nursery' rhymes,
sustaining the heaviest load they have ever felt ,
not to let their baskets drop and give the watchful squirrels 
a chance to snatch some of the tempting fruits away!
And as they look up, dusk makes its appearance to scare them away!
And as if they were chased by unleashed dogs,
some fall, some run for their lives...an useless drama started by fancy!
Much fun they had, but unhappy about the bruises on their knees,
at least, they had one consolation: all the peaches and cherries they could eat!
And they laughed at each other, no one could ever forget about their fright!


Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Haiku | |

Boy Is It Cloudy

a cotpit viewing
altitude eight hundred feet
cloud coverage below





Tribute To Flying High LOL


Details | Senryu | |

Bikini

Bikini
From afar looked nude;
Her incarnate bikini,
The ocean’s beach rose.


Details | Dramatic Verse (Verse Drama) | |

DRAMA AT THE ZOO

" That's not my elephant!"
Ella yelled at the zoo-keeper...
walking slowly on her hands and feet
scaring the second grader away;
and making a funny face
she added, " She doesn't eat spaghetti!"
with a strong southern accent.
" Young lady, don't make fun
of people and animals...
they have feelings like you!"
but she, with little respect 
for the middle-aged man replied,"
Read The Bill Of Rights...I can do
what I like...I have got freedom of speech!"
" I do too, little punk!" Ray answered in rage.
" If you don't knock it off,
you will not see your baby elephant today!" 
" Listen, old man I may be a tomboy,
but you have a foul smell and you need a shower!"
" I need a shower...you need to wipe off 
that ugly, fat face of yours...what are you trying to do
with all that make-up: look like a cover girl?"
They finally got into a physical fight...
she splashed a bottle of water on the zoo-keeper,
and he wiped the heavy make-up off her face...
"Oh, this fun" she said with excitement...
" Yes, I am having fun too!" he confessed.
And they laughed hard at each other...
while the elephant and second grader danced.


Details | Haiku | |

There's No Place Like Home

the great sand bubbler
watches incoming ribbed tide
from burrows back home


Details | Senryu | |

The Mall

My wife

Exuberant spending

Conjoined stores

The mall


Details | Quatrain | |

THE STINGING KIND

Jellyfish is the stinging kind,
it is found in droves
on our crowded beaches...
any little sting can drive anyone wild.


Yes, they are spineless, mordant and gelitous...
being closed watched by large gulls with a hungry palate,
but are chased away by dogs so ferocious;
I'm wondering how they will look and taste on my plate!


And still curious kids scoop them with plastic sand-shovels
and try to save them by dropping them in water-filled buckets,
running with excitement...ignoring the screams of their moms,
and they yell, " Put them down, they will sting you more than once!"


O jellyfishes, don't be vicious...we love you like shell-fish,  
if you could talk, your bizarre conduct won't be misunderstood by many! 
Is the water so polluted and infested with sharks that you flee from the sea, 
or are the fishermen so angry for wasted time on a worthless catch?


Details | Free verse | |

ADVISE FOR GUYS BOUND FOR PATHMARK

I'm pushing this heavy cart 
without any strenght left,
and through isles swarming with shoppers  
I'm confused by the above signs;
I rush to the one I missed dismaying onlookers.
How can I be so forgetful...
shouldn't I have a list of all items
I use thoughout the week?
I admit that guys are different from gals
with their minds focus on household things!


Yes, we guys aren't as patient as they are,
looking for bargains is a thriftiness that bugs us;
and down those isles we go..not reading labels,
not comparing prices...just filling up our shopping cart
with food we don't really need!  And who will be embarassed
when the cashier tells us annoyingly that the credit card
has been declined! Oh, good grief...we don't carry enough cash,
to avoid blushing in the publice eye while the the line gets longer!  


My advice to you guys: before you venture out shopping, stash your wallet
with enough cash, or check the balance on your credit or debit card;
it's another way of being smart! And besides being admired, you may also find romance
while you are in line and a pretty girl smiles, trying to start an intelligent conversation...
leading to a date or even marriage! Do you get it? Look sharp, flash lots of money
and really get lucky! If you fellas do what I have suggested, 
you'll have broads flocking to you and your buddies will envy you for your luck!


Details | Free verse | |

Sebastopol - Apple Blossom Weekend

The First Methodist Church,
with its bold wooden steeple,
burnt to the ground in 1914,
for preaching prohibition.
The good folks of Sebastopol
weren’t having any of that.
Today the Apple Blossom
Parade marches past
the rebuilt church, past
the Masonic Temple, past
Martha’s Mexican restaurant,
with its soup bowl Margaritas, 
past Old Main Street Tavern,
overflowing with biker patrons,
and Jasper O’ Farrell’s,
past The Powerhouse Brewery,
The Greenhouse, and G.T.O’s,
with its bottomless Bloody Marys.
As the entire town, marching bands 
and all, spill into Ivy’s Park 
for a two day party, pixilated music,
and four dollar beers to support
Analy Union High School.
No wonder Luther Burbank
and Charles Schulz
called Sebastopol their home.
And The First Methodist Church,
now made of stone, 
the only quiet place in town.


Details | Lyric | |

Snowpacalypse 2012

The hills are getting slippery in Seattle
News blares “Snowmageddon stay inside!”
People lined up galore at their favorite grocery store
Stalking up on snow gear and supplies

Its pandemonium all around
There’s no one to be found 
The whole city shuts down
OMG its snow!

And sidewalks filled with slush
To our feet we’re yelling “Mush!”
But it doesn’t help us much
As down we go

The cars with 4 wheel drive
Spinning out in a nosedive 
are just trying to survive
this whiteout rodeo

School gets canceled for the day
The parents yell “No Way!”
But the kids all sing “Hooray!”
“We love the snow!”

And they all fill up the streets
Hurling snowballs made of sleet
making snowman by the fleet
getting soaked from head to toe

The hills are getting slippery in Seattle
The cars are playing pinball by the lot
People tripping, slipping, falling on their keisters
From the 2 inches of snow that we got


Details | Ballade | |

Mystery

             


             A friend of mine the other day
             stepped inside my brain
             No one has heard from my friend since
              A mystery that will remain.

             I opened up the cellar door
             to feel the surging heat
             I looked below and there behold
            was my missing friend at my feet.

            He beckoned me to follow him
             down a dark and dismal path
            I took the lead because of my greed
              and no sooner felt the wrath.

            The wrath I felt was my own wrath
             for I had fallen into my brain
             No one has heard from me since
              A mystery that will remain!


Details | Haiku | |

Armor Hotdog

bird of feather
flocks the all mighty sea shore
just for a hotdog






Tribute To
The Hotdog 
In All Of Us  LOL


Details | Rhyme | |

Morning Sunshine

    The sun is breaking the horizon,
a thousand rainbows of dewy light,
reflect off newly mown hay.
Bleats,moos,caws,hisses,neighs,and winneys
of the barnyard
the beginning of a pastoral day.
The rays of the sun,
crawl along the ground
just touching the vane ,
of that ,old red barn.
Time to get up ,get out of bed
life waits for no one,
when you live upon a farm.
Strutting proudly  up the path,
he's the cock of the roost,
the one to start the day.
He knows that he's one fine specimen,
his carcass it's grade "A".
He gives all the hens a wink,
not quite honest or sincere.
He jumps upon the highest perch,
for all to see and hear.
Throws out his some what massive,
feathery chest,
Throws back his head ,
to do his best.
Croak..............
Darn no cough syrup for roosters.


Details | Rhyme | |

PET-SICK PANIC

Eddy, the dog-walker, of Park Lane South, seems
the youngest guy to ever be followed with fervor 
by a bunch of well-groomed, and well-fed puppies;
and does one not wonder how he manages them all?  


He has been in the pet business for decades charging minimal fees,
and what a great service he provides for his customers he loves to please;
never did he lose any of them...his dealings are fair, kind and friendly
and considering the amount he handles, he must be a very smart guy! 


Exactly at eight o' clock, he leaves his shop without a bite,
turning all responsibilities over to Debbie,
and he trusts her like she were close family;
don't trust and friendship go hand in hand as kid and kite?


By the way I've described him, you think everything goes smoothly?
No, by Heaven's sake he has his ups and downs constantly;
and when one of those hounds escapes from an unlocked cage...
you should see how he runs after him, feel his uncontrolled rage!


Details | Sonnet | |

Minnesota Nice

The great upper mid west
Minnesota put to the test
Ten thousand lakes and streams
Reality for many who like to dream


From Itasca state park
To the Louisiaina's wooden bark
The mighty Mississippi flows
Gently down the outcrop she goes


Crime rates are always's on the rise
But really does it come as such a surprise
Everyone seems to like to hug
Except when its a mosquito bug


So many call us Minnesota Nice
But some still say were Cold as Ice




Details | Rhyme | |

A Bush Walk

On a clear day, under a blue sky
My friends and I
Decided to go for a picnic lunch
So we headed out with a basket full of yummy
Things to munch on
The walk was long
But we were having fun
Warming our bodies in the midday sun

But while our fun had just begun
We were in for a shock
For sunning himself on a rock
Was a wombat wearing an akubra hat
My god he was an ugly little thing
And one of the ugliest wombats I’ve ever seen
We all let out a startled scream
Because this wombat could walk the walk
As well as talk the talk
And he told us with a snort
That he was going to take our lunch
And not to complain
Or he’d punch our lights out
Were we that game?

We all gave an angry shout
There was no way we were going to
let him steal our meal
just then the wombat let out a startled squeal
because at that moment who should come
crashing through the bush?

It’s none other than Skippy the kangaroo
Woooohooo!
He’ll know what to do
The true blue superhero
In for some action like Robert De Nero
We decide to call him
Here skip! We call
But watch in dismay as he trips and falls
Over a rock
He took a hard knock
And as Skippy crumpled to the floor
Faster than and unwashed sock
We knew for sure
That Skippy was more zero than hero

And as we stood there
We were scared once more
When the wombat saw this
He jumped off his rock
And gave us a look that made our hearts stop
But then we realized his size
He was only inches high
With a smile I raised my foot
And kicked that wombat into the sky
With a relived we saw that wombat fly
Now that was all over and done
We could start having fun again
And we got to keep our lunch in the end!


Details | Rhyme | |

True Camel's

On African deserts you must be wary,
Of the famous one humped Dromedary.
He is jealous of his Asian brother,
Who has that hump and then another!

That Bactrian camel (the one with two humps)
Must slow way down when crossing bumps!
When those humps hit they go, "Ker-Splatt!"
Did you know those things are filled with fat?

Bactrian camel's are handsome guys,
With long thick brows around their eyes!
With those two humps and pretty faces,
They're very popular at the oasis!

So that's the story of True Cammel's
That happy, humpy desert mammal.
On any desert you should be wise,
Park your car and ride these guys!

Copyright 2010 Karma Adamson

Karma
Copyright 2010 Karma Adamson


Details | I do not know? | |

Rhythm

The scribble of pen on paper
The low rumble of hushed voices
The shuffle of people walking by
The tapping of keys on a keyboard
The rustle of turning pages
The hum of lights above me
The tap of subconscious fingers
The whizz of cars passing by
The clip of opening and closing binders
The thunk of a mug landing on desk
The buzz of the bees outside
The screech of seagulls over the shore
The chink of the hole-punch
The glug of a water bottle
The crash of waves against the sand
The bells of laughter in the distance

Lifes Natural Rhythm.


Details | Limerick | |

Bunny

I once had a big fury bunny,
He was sweet and yes, he was funny.
He would hop all day,
and then I would say,
Let’s go to the park where it's sunny.


Details | Limerick | |

Worried and How

I saw a figure on the beach.
Was it a man or woman in reach?
The variance I know well.
However, I could not tell.
I do not dare to beseech.


Details | Light Poetry | |

SALMON OVERDOSE by an Alaskan

SALMON OVERDOSE by an Alaskan

Salmon, salmon every day
Every time and every way

Alaska breakfast
Salmon lunch
Add some nuts
To make a crunch

Thank you fisher man
My friend
For sharing
Salmon without end

What is prized in cities far
Fills my pantry
Jar by jar

White wine adds a little bite
When I whine I feel contrite
But the fragrance of this fish
Makes me want
Another dish
When I yearn
For beans or rice
Please be patient and be nice.

Oh, New Yorkers
Call on me
Trade me fora ton of Brie.


Details | Haiku | |

Go Fetch

a leap of great faith
time to hit the water pool
fetching is for me






Tribute To
Man's Best Friend


My Pup {Shadow}  LOL


Details | Burlesque | |

Cheap Toilet Seat Cover

Now I'm not the kind of guy
used to luxury or wealth
fancy "cribs" as they now
call them (ain't that ridiculous?)
the only luxury I've tasted
is on TV with Robin Bleach...
or in brief stays on vacation
where I liveed nicely for a bit
but these were all illusions
and life is really here
no champagne in my 'frig
I can hardly afford beer...


my trailer is a place,
I don't quite yet feel at ease with
got its good points and  its bad
the skylight options,
put in kitchen and bathroom
they're really pretty cool
especially when it rains
the built in cd/radio with
4 speakers in the ceiling
a must for a musician
the kitchen okay too

But, the bathroom............
like it came from 
a different factory....
$2 cheap plastic toilet
seat covers...
you dare not sit on
or even place
a small box of tissues
and a bathtub which even
the munchkins would
feel crowded in
in fact, no non-anorectic
human should even try
I know I didn't
appreciate 42 hours
butt-wedged between
the sides...
good only as a footbath...
and getting out of
the shower is a life
threatening risk
so slippery, with
nothing to grab hold to
I guess in time
I'll get used to it
maybe rig
ingenious contraptions
to help one
exit the tub, etc.
who knows...
people can get use to almost
anything.....
I mean... they get
married, don't they?


Details | Cinquain | |

Poetry Soup {Cinquain}

                                                      soupbowl
                                                   appetite dish
                                            limerick cinquain freeverse
                                        mind challenging boggling fun
                                                         potluck





Tribute To All 
At  The Soup


Details | Haiku | |

Banzai Tokyo

Banzai Tokyo
Land lashing tsunami tongue
Godzilla is home


Details | Light Poetry | |

Leaf blower's unite

It is a morning in early spring
I see my flowerpots filled with left over growth
So ugly and demised
Peaceful and quiet ,until the surprise

Of multiple leaf blowers
From every corner of the neighborhood 
It was as though they called each other out 
Funny one man starts his and it must prompt 
the rest 
Lets see who can do there best 

Soon my head was filled with noise
from every angle of the yard 
Dogs would be barking, babies waking from their naps 
All for the sake of leaves 
God is there no rest from this weary place 
What ever happened to a man using his rake?


Details | Rhyme | |

Barkerville

There is a little town where once they mined for gold.
now it's just a tourist place, where stories are retold.

Like the one about the miners, who where both on their death bed.
Well, one  he bet the other he'd out live this friend call Fred.

As the clock stuck midnight, poor old Ed he passed away,
And his old miner friend he lived another day.

Now both these two old fellas lay up on old boot hill,
And the story it lives on, and we hear it ever still.

Now as you walk the pathways that the miners use to tread,
You see the lovely forget me knots, And hear the voices of the dead.

You hear them whisper gentle,though the needles of the pine,
as they  walk and talk together about another time.

Yes, they walk and talk together about the days of long ago,
and you wish that you'd been with them, so your story too, could be tole.


Details | Rhyme | |

Why I Write

I write to release all of the emotions I’ve picked up during the day,

I write to remember happy memories, and to make the bad ones fade away.

I write because I am in love. I write because I’m in pain…

I write because I have nothing to lose, and so very much to gain.

I write when my head is filled with fantasies, dreams and or goals,

I write because just like an actor, my mind takes on many roles.

I write my own songs, poems and sometimes silly little rants,

I write because I feel, I write because I can’t.

I write to show others like me that they are never alone,

I write to create another world that is simply my own.

I write because I am proud. I write because I’m ashamed…

I write when there’s a voice inside of me that can’t be tamed. 

I write at three in the morning when I can’t fall asleep,

I write because it is far better than counting furry sheep.

I write because I always have something to say,

I write because it has made me into who I am today.


Details | Couplet | |

Poetry

Poetry is a world,
Pure and innocent as a pearl

It is form of view,
That is only seen by a few

Poets can unfurl their truths,
And don't need to support it with any proof

It's a place where the grass can be blue,
and broken cell phones can be transformed into glue

Where the sky is yellow,
And people rejoin with loved ones within a sweet meadow

Where flightless birds are given the sky, 
To hop out of gravity and just go up and fly

Poetry is a world,
Pure and innocent as a pearl


Details | Rhyme | |

Stop the ride now please ...

Why dont you stop this ride we’re on ?
How come its taking so damn  long ?
Did you not hear the first time I said 
if we keep going we’ll  both end up dead?
But you never listen just keep going 
I cant keep doing this all the while knowing 
all of the dangers that lies up ahead.
Please listen to the words I have said.
So please stop this ride I wanna get off 
Not in minute or even later ! Dont you scoff 
Stop here right now, not up ahead !
For this is dangerous ground that we tread.
But you will not listen to me and take  heed 
If we keep going I guess there will be no need 
For the track up ahead comes to a dead end 
Please! Oh please! Just try to comprehend!


Details | Prose Poetry | |

Eightynine

 Eightynine 
Eightynine 
 
 
CharlaXFabels 
 
FearsRelived 
 
FearsReleave 
 

Main Entry: relieved Function: adjective Date: 1850: experiencing 
or showing relief especially from anxiety or pent-up emotions 
— re•liev•ed•ly  \-ˈlē-vəd-lē\ adverb Relive One entry found. 
relive 
Main Entry: re•live   
Pronunciation: \(ˌ)rē-ˈliv\ Function: verb 
Date: 1548 intransitive verb 
: to live againtransitive verb: to live over again; especially : to experience 
again in the imagination Releave must be an adjective or mabe just a noun eye 
frown as some of my flock of followers must do at some of the spellings eye 
make of words that have been spelled this way for at least six years. Main Entry: 
reweave  Reweave can be found at Merriam-WebsterUnabridged.com. Reweave 
is the way ELMER GLUEALL says RELEAVE. OH FUDD. WAIT. Releave looks 
just like a real word does it not class. This is the reason we have school idint it 
so fun. Some professors get a case of nerves when something like this typo 
occurs but eye as a Lewis type teacher make inroads of nuances the words 
flowing in the desert places like oasis of stasis static ornaments near Colorado 
Boulder. There was this episode of Mork and Mindy where the EGG went flying 
and OH my it landed hard.  The memory gets better when you stop. Just give it 
some more time to regenerate the Christ is GOD. People are idiots in there 
dealings with other people. Scientific evident escaped the masses when they 
chose to witness to the escaping gases of the sublime whiskey beer farts given 
time they may recover the couches with upholsters from the hang over guns of 
the cowboy trudges. TO: the eviloushonist life is just a reactored accidental 
inflated accident. The worthless people who run the behind the scenes at the 
internet places aer too blame they aer too flaming strang. There is a 
misconcepting theorem that people do what other people think the truth is that 
people do the impossible things that no one does or even thinks of like getting 
up from a day of boredom and going on to see what finding means to see what 
living does. Please do not feel let down or depressed or put upon eye tired to 
make this fabel work without an idea of any kind without a premises without a 
forum places without much hope of even rhyme this thing is done this is quite 
enought for now please stay tuned and keep me ici and come back its 
SATURDAY the next one will be formed on SUNDAY when the author has more 
time. 



Details | Couplet | |

Dewsbury Moor

The snow fell in Dewsbury Moor overnight,
They woke up at lunch to a horrible sight,
The snow had flowed through the broken gates,
And roads were blocked all across the estates,
The giros had still not arrived after ten,
So wailing was general within the crack den.
The bin bags piled up to the lower window,
Obscured by the grime-defying, beautyfying snow.
The wind whistled through the boarded up seams,
Of windows and roused men from opiate dreams,
While weary-eyed women with mascara'd tears,
Tend to their children, three in four years.
But the memories stay as the snow melts away,
How beautiful Dewsbury Moor looked today!


Details | Lyric | |

Show Me Your England, Ashton

Show Me Your England, Ashton
Show Me Your England, Dear
Show Me Your England, Ashton
Now, That I’m Finally Here…

He Took Me To New London Bridge
He Took Me To The Tower
And The House Of Lords And The Privileged
As Big Ben Chimed The Hour

He Took Me To Piccadilly Square
… Rode On The River Thames
England, Is Extraordinaire
And I’m Glad I Saw It With Him

… To The Palace Of Buckingham
Then Again To Parliament
At Hyde Park, We Had Tea And Jam
Then A Pub, For Refreshment

But Of The Sights, That He Chose
The Best Is; I Saw The Queen!
The Next Day, When I Arose…
Why… It Had Been A Dream… So…

Show Me, Your England, Ashton
Show Me Your England, Dear
Show Me Your England, Ashton
Now, That I’m Finally Here…


Details | Free verse | |

Runcorn Moonlit Romance

Through the erotic alleyways
of dim set lamppost light,
smoky the figure struts on by
to catch the last bus of the night.
It's gone past eleven,
and it's down grim lucks drive,
but she'd've danced till dawn
swimming in any old dive-
Off goes the lady of liquor,
toes screeching to be a little quicker,
Her blisters cry to green sleeves 
But she daren't try paddling in hazer's heap.
And she is in presence of charm
by tweens and men offering her arm.
They serenade her beauty in heckled praise:
"Your dead fit- give us a gob-job la"
and with a hickup she giggles,
and coyly flutters her stuck on eyes.

Oh the seductive sound of chavs zipper
that to her delight moonlight flicker
gives a hint to their gift like that of the ripper.
She passes by,
oh those gentle pricks of enticement-
the serenade fading to silence,
meeting her backed against the wall.
Nervous she presses her dress to her stomach,
blushing she takes her other hand
seductively pressing it on her lips and down her throat.
He grabs her wrist and thrusts his surprise toward it,
she bows her head in submission,
taking a firm grip-
she lurches and twists.

"There you go" she legs it. 


Details | ABC | |

The Court Street Philosopher (

One day when I was working in a furniture store
What do you know, he comes walking through the door
He starts off by saying hookers are a dime a dozen
He says he knows because he has a hot cousin
Now listen to his conversation,  he talks like a kidergardener
Well we will just call him the Court Street Philosopher
He starts back up- You know chewing gum won't come off the bottom of your 
shoes
That's why I buy mine at the Goodwill, never brand new
The sun is damaging, so I stay inside, that's why I am so pale
Hay is cheaper when you buy it by the bale
Where is he going with this talk, he makes no sense, it's coming from nowhere
There is nothing you can do when you start losing your hair
He keeps on with his continuos blabber
A young lady walks in, he whispers to me I could have had her
He tells me about how many men she has slept with, now he's a gossiper
But still he remains the Court Street Philosopher
Hair looks better when it is tapered
He pulls out a hankee and blows his nose, it's cheaper to carry one of these than 
waste all that paper
The hankee was stiff and crusty
He looks around and says if you sweep each day, this place wouldn't be so dusty
I tell him to put away his hankee before one of the stiff pieces cuts you
He looks at me and says this conversation is going nowhere, we're through
But now I am graced by his presence even more, I made the mistake of marrying 
his daughter
Now he is family and a close Court Street Philosopher


Details | Rhyme | |

Time To Get Up

Tick tock tick tock
Out window with that clock
Each and every frigging day
Tells me to get out of hay

Brushing teeth
Breath smelling so sweet
Another dam hole in sock
Oh how I hate that clock

Blue jean entire
God I'm really tired
Clean sand bugers out of eyes
In rush to say goodbye's

Gas light engine on again
This crisis is such a sin
Scrounging pockets for a buck
Pulling out lint what such luck

Morning greetings from the boss
When all I wanted to do was stay in bed and toss
Paper work piling up
No coffee to fill my cup


Tic tock tick tock
Come on hurry up dam clock
For shopping still has to be done
And let me tell you it's no fun


Kids husband dogs and cats
Drive me nuts like a pack of rats
What can one do
But not to come unglued

So I want to give a big thanks
To my alarm clock that doesn't play pranks
And gets me up and out that door
So I can pay for those things I truely adore

















Details | Free verse | |

MORNING RUSH

                                                           
                                             

I am widely read,~ Train doors open,
o my readers sit~some riders get off.  
or stand on long~ " Pardon me, sir! "
train cars! Sleep~  Guys' faces daze,
they won't since~someone is too glad
words get tense,~ while her legs trot;             
and action stirs; ~  no preacher cries                        
o another reason~  out at such sight! 
they read a lot,~ Cops on the watch,
is not to make ~  suspicion of threat;
real eye contact!~dogs sniff package.                          
                                                                                                         


Details | Epigram | |

Take Charge (Epigram)

Mosquito you deserve a stump
Off my hand or I slap your rump

© Joseph, 11/11/07
© All Rights Reserved

Epigram is derived from the Greek word “epigramma” meaning “inscription.” The 
epigram is short, satiric, and witty. It used at times to express social criticism or 
political satire, and is often written as a single rhyming couplet. 


Details | Haiku | |

Whats Cooking

mojave desert
one hundred and one in shade
can cook egg on rock


Details | Ballad | |

A BUCKINGHAMSHIRE BOY-recited

Aye 'ee is fierce and hale.
Four mile to work,across the vale;
No slommakin' slattern 'ee,
Okkard as an itching flea.

Eee'd fetch hosses to boss's yard,
Garmed with mud,as thick as lard,
Cla'holt of 'em wiv a rope,
On is own,allus could cope.

Niver sees 'im vexed,or aggled,
Even if drenched and bedraggled;
In lightning 'e wore niver frit,
Though the whole sky wore fork-lit.

Grew peas that kidded well,
Allus 'ad a tale to tell.


Dialect from around Aylesbury Vale ,England in 1940's

Listen to me read this in this dialect on youtube under my pen name ichthyschiro


Details | Narrative | |

I'm Just What Your Looking For

since the year of 1952 the city of st paul Minnesota holds
their annual treasure hunt the king and queen of snows
goes out to a city park and hides a medallion worth
10,000 dollars if you are the winner and your carnaville
button is register with the st paul pioneer press
which gives out 12 cryptic clues and this little medallion
could be wrapped in just about anything from diapers to cookies 
and the frigid weather here just may make you want to just
stay by the fireplace and sip on hot coco with family and friends
even lucky finder gets to ride along with the king and queen of snow
in the closing ceremony of it's torchlight parade
also watch out for the vulcans krewe for they like to dethrone the king
and leave you with a black smudges across your sweet cheeks





Tribute To The Winter Carnaville
BURRRRRRRRRRR LOL

Carnaville runs
Jan 21-31 

Also Entry For
Carolyn Devonshire's
Christmas In Your Town Contest


Details | Quatrain | |

PART II-THE ESCAPE OF A ROOSTER NAMED HARBOR

When the well-rested rooster woke up at noon, he found himself in the lap
of a gorgeous boy and he was telling his mom with urgency,
"I want this rooster, he can keep the lonely and moody parrot company!"
And staring at him," It's a rooster, not a pet!" she exclaimed.


Mothers always try to please their kids, and sometimes they really spoil them,
not according to their customs and beliefs, controversially fathers are stricter than them;
"I'll take care of him and soon he'll be living in our ranch home" he promised...
and continuing,"From now on, his name will be Harbor: the lovely place where I found him!"


The gentle boy kept his promise and Harbor became part of the family,
and the talkative parrot taught him to say the exact words he said;
and months went by, but nobody knew that he could speak so humanly,
and how did they find out that Harbor was smarter than an ordinary bird?


They overheard him in a challenging conversation about finding a perfect mate, 
in the shortest time and the shrewd parrot thought he surely would have been the winner,
but to his surprise, Harbor used his accumulated wisdom and searched the nearby farm,
where chicks were bred and then put in perforated carboard crates on a freighter.


Harbor looked around and didn't really like any of the chicks he saw,
and was he about to give up on his search? Suddenly not! He trotted past the noisy farm,
and to his bewilderment, he spotted a young chicken on the grass below...
and gallantly approached her, and with a chat started a romantic affair by keeping her warm.


Harbor and the young chick clicked and they quickly were talking about marriage,
lots of baby chicks to feed: the ultimate dream of two domesticated birds; 
at first, the upset boy wasn't too happy about their agreement, and exploded in rage,
but realizing what was best for Harbor, he finally gave him his blessings.


On the same farm the newly-wed live, and have big plans for a large family;
one more thing, if curious folks decide to visit them anytime soon, they need a reservation.
They will show them around with their fowl hospitality, but rule out temptation;
none of them will end up on their plates for the next Holidays or any other special festivity!


Details | Haiku | |

Moon Shine Trilogy (Haiku Series)

fresh Moonshine
hidden jars in barn
country road

~~~~~~~~~~~:::~~~~~~~~~~~

sweet corn from the field
natural grain distillation
liquid vapor flows

~~~~~~~~~~~:::~~~~~~~~~~~

mountain still brewing
transforming barley and rye
Appalachian!

~~~~~~~~~~~:::~~~~~~~~~~~


Details | Free verse | |

Bee's

{bee's}

the dancing machines
please stay away from everyone's knees
you very nasty

{bee's}

Please please please
stay away from especially
my knees you very nasty 
and honorable theives

{bee's}

so please fly off to those daisies
for these these these are the only way I want it to

{ bee's }





Little Song Jenny And I came Up When She Was 4 LOL 
Thanks All For Stopping

Also Entry For Matt Caliri's Contest
Funnest-hardest Poem Ever


Details | Senryu | |

Summer Pool

Summer Pool
Bikini time fun;
hanging ten by the cool pool,
grinning men enjoy.


Summer Season Senryu


Details | Imagism | |

The Other Side Of The Moon

...






                                                      Spaceship trips


                                                 In the literature it says


Details | Light Poetry | |

You Little Stinker

Go To Hell

         Will I Smell



No Pun Intended
Just Some  LOL'S


Details | Limerick | |

ALL FOR LOVE

Poor octogenarian Darrell,  
At Niagara with his young bride, Carol,     
The love struck old geezer,              
In order to please her,
Plunged over the falls in a barrel. 


Details | Lyric | |

In Thought Out of Thought

Once on line
And then off line
Once in thought
Then out of thought

Run far 
Far away
Slam the door
You seem afraid

I will not harm you
My words will be few
I will not question
Nor pursue you 

The door again now opens
The door again now closes
Again in thought
Again out of thought


Details | Free verse | |

Two A.M. Poem

I told a stranger about you last night
in a dim place
where people only need to know
the name of
what bottle they're drinking
no others really matter
all are seeking the same
its a cure
a temporary fix
after all  
who wants to be lonely tonite
the old gal I'm talking to
fancies me
I wish she'd quit rubbing my leg
she keeps buying me 
my tonic
mixed by a vixen who's shirt is too tight
she is sucking in my words
like a vampire
I told her all 
the passion and romance
all your talents
the beauty you have
how I let you down
and how you did it
without me
she ask questions
and I 
indulge in a full highlight
of your life
its 2am
the vixen behind the bar
turns the lights on
we know our time is up
the old gal and I
look in each others eyes
and she says,
I wish I was twenty years younger
you deserve better
than what you got 




Details | Ballad | |

Boondocks Or Sticks

I went to visit Elroy, Emma, my nephew and niece
In a town where all residents are missing some teeth
The name of the town is Boondocks or Sticks
I finally arrive and am greeted by my nephew and niece, their names are Hominy 
and Grits
Boondocks falls in the state of Georgia and Sticks falls in the state of South 
Carolina
The residents could not decide which name would be finer
The annual vote always ends in a split
I believe it will always be Boondocks or Sticks
This town has a single chair barbershop
The peppermint pole uses too many kilowatts
Last time it was used
It blew the transformer, the town was left with no power, dazed and confused
There are new rumors going around
A Dollar General is coming to this town
I wonder if I turned on the peppermint pole would the town\'s lights begin to flick
There is no other town like Boondocks or Sticks


Details | Limerick | |

MY, MY, MAHALIA!

In the town of Vidalia, GA,
Lived a girl named Mahalia, they say.
Then a strong southern breeze,
Blowing in from the seas,
Blew Vidalia Mahalia away.


Details | I do not know? | |

DEFIANT GROVER

Grover Deaver drove his diesel down to Dover--
Down to Dover in the state of Delaware.
I told Grover that his rig was overloaded,
But Grover Deaver said he didn't care.


Details | Free verse | |

succesive septimal-THE CIRCUS IS FUN

Need to laugh?
Watch a clown's
       face!


Elephants's
strategy...
       dust!
 
              
Come out now,
slim jugglers...
        fun!


Trapezes swing...
couple making
        stunts!


Baby's eyes
look too scared...
         lion!
         

Small monkeys
jump and play...
         cheer!


Fast stallions
excite crowd...
          glee!


All come out
to thank them...
          glad!


Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci


Details | Quatrain | |

Get to Work

Men at work, bumper to bumper
tensile traffic, thick black bitumen.
Everything seems to last longer 
then that grey granulated concrete

that extends from Bodega, Cali-
fornia to Savannah, Georgia.
Blacktop pot-fill smells like
the solid and searing work of roofers;

hardhat knuckle down workers,
men that stretch skyscraper towers,
or suspend themselves over
the ledge of the Golden Gate Bridge.

If only this endless line of steel
on rubber wheels could steam roll
past the frustrated flashing lights
and pinstriped lattes honking horns.

If only these orange jump suites,
(sloth shaped men on armrest shovels,)
spent less time blathering like this poem,
we’d all be able to get to work. 




Details | Iambic Pentameter | |

Windy Jade Green Sea Frenzy

Whooosh! Brrrrr...icy!..North wind in a steady gale blowing hard.

Whipping up the  green sea into a jade and white peaked frenzy.

The water turning to  an  ultramarine blue on  the misty  horizon
 
Dappled  clouds  echo a  scaly sea pattern in the lavender  sky .

The cool  Winter sun  shyly  peeking through  the cloudy canvas.

Walking with  the wind a woman with  a  whippet braces bravely.

Facing the salt spray and a wild sea  the wind carries her along.

Burnt sienna sponge corals daley with  red rubber spike corals

Empty crab shells crunched under moon crescent horse shoes 


Details | Rhyme | |

Let's Duke It Out

I was born in nineteen sixty nine
just off the block and in my prime
now let me introduce you to 
some pertty good friends of mine

Let's start with my uncle Jesse
to me he looks like he's ninety nine
but I love to watch him when he
takes nips from his moonshine 

Here's my owners Bo and Luke 
cousins of a kind just hanging out
with Daisy who looks 
so sweet and so darn fine

But There's some other folks
that just don't like our kind
its those sheriff folks thats
watching the hazzard county line

Starting with their fearless leader Boss Hogg
Who's radioing all the frigging time to
Cooter and Davenport And to that rascal
Rosco P Coltrane who he cannot find

Now my life is such sweet devine
when your jumping in and out of my windows 
while running from those sheriffs from Georgia County line
in my general lee waving a confederate flag thats in it's prime
Honking my horn to a dixie tune of same kind



Tribute To The Dukes Of Hazzard LOL


Also Entry For
Christopher Higgin's 
Get Your Rebel On!


Tho This Poem Is Not About A Person 
Changing My Life But The Time Era Did
And Something About That Show Changed Me
About Opening Your Heart And Home To All


Details | Free verse | |

SUNBLOCK

In my sixteens I used to go to Rockaway Park
on the A train made famous by Armstrong's song,
it had rides, small restaurants and a clean beach...
there I got golden brown with lots of cappertone.
I looked more handsome in a tan that boys envied,
and flexing my sexy body, I seduced many girls.

Back then in the late sixties, gals who whistled
to get a boy's attention was considered rude,
had they lived today, it would have been quite normal...
has any woman winked at you when you walked 
on the boardwalk or lay on a beach towel?
Don't be embarrassed because lifestyles change... 
and we must change, if we ought to fit in!


Sometimes romance or flirting didn't come that easily,
with a long face I hopped on the train and viewed 
the Jamaica Bay with its wild life unfolding before me...
the quietest place for a teenager who loved Nature;
and while many sunsets saw me spell-bound,
I hated to go back and live the mundane life, 
but at least I had gotten an adorable tan and looked hot! 


My completion is ruddy as Adam's was...what a healthy, attractive color!
It wont take much sunblock to get darker than those California guys...
what about the pretty girls seen on Baywatch? Pamela looks great in summer.
And crossing my fingers, I wish for one like that to excite my nights!


Details | Sonnet | |

Global Trot

I’m out of my mind but I am just perfect and just fine.
I went around the world and what a blast it was for me.
I’m sent with a message from a golden gate master key.
I shook I rattled and I rolled brand new maps I did align.

I founded you and I demolished you but swam like a fish in line.
I ran to and fro as I was left behind thrown forward but I did see.
It is a global trot I tell you to survive naked or dressed just to be.
And then it came to be true and real that this was mine all mine.

So I sit in the seat with no defeat.
The world goes stupid and so mad,
But I stay clean and of course neat,
It’s just a silly little one time life fad.

Pain and suffering has just about killed me and you,
Together or apart it is a world we will always renew!


®Registered: Ann Rich   2009


Details | Light Poetry | |

I'm Really Teed Off {Footle}

tee off
    love golf

               in rough
                        get tough
 
                                sand trap
                                          oh crap

                                              on green
                                                      get mean

                                                              in cup
                                                                   ker plup

                                                                             just par
                                                                                     so far
            
                                                                                        next hole
                                                                                                    let's go

                                                                                                             golf pro
                                                                                                                      hell no




Tribute To Golfers
Time To Tee Off
See Ya On Back 9   L0L


Details | I do not know? | |

"Going Places...."

Recognized, for a small collection

Drawn over time....Notified....Certified

I wonder if they'll give me

A bronze statue for that

Or perhaps a plaque, and

A pat on the back?

High fives all around

"Your going places boy

Try to keep your feet

Upon the ground....

No party complete you know

If your not in town"

So they tell me

And, so I hear....

I wonder, if they'll give me

Some chips with my beer?

Looking at their faces

All their gowns, and all their ties

Caviar and cocktails

And a few, low fives....

I wonder, if they'll give me

A star made of gold

Twenty-four karat, so

It doesn't rust, when I grow old?

"Your going places boy

Try to keep your head

Beneath the clouds....

Here....There....There come the crowds"

Pretty faces....Warm embraces

"Heres my number....'Call me'

When their not around!"

So, this is it....This

Is where it all begins?

"Your going places boy

How does it feel, now

That your in!?"

Now....

I wonder, if I want it

Their accolades....And all their tin

Pondering....Maybe I'll pass, this time

The glory....Without the sin?

"Your going places boy

All you gotta do....Is smile....And....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

....Pretend!?"


Details | Rhyme | |

Made for the USA

If you want to win or go astray
You are just made for the USA

Too much right too much freedom
All are kings in that kingdom 

Too much work too much fun
Like the hard working sun

Too much might too much money
The USA my honey


Details | Free verse | |

Dew Drop Inn

There was a place called Dew Drop Inn
In that place, you could find many a friend
As long as you drank beer, wine, whiskey or gin
There was always some-one surrounding you 
Happily obliging to join in with you
Dancing and singing often off key
Didn’t matter to the barkeep 
He was always as pleased as can be
Especially when customers spent more than fifty 
When time to close before he would turn the key
He would state "Thank you for coming friends
To the Dew Drop Inn, Please Do Drop in Again" 


Details | Light Poetry | |

MAIL PUZZLE

MAIL   PUZZLE

Indians call India  Bharat, so now you know.  
And the Chinese call China   Zhong-Guo
Islands are called Malvinas by some guys,
And Falklands by those with different  ties. 
Congo? Zaire? Congo? What is it today?
Will Mumbai revert to being Bombay?
Now I can reasonably understand 
To the Germans, Germany’s  Deutschland,
But I can’t see by what sleight of hand
Finns got to call it  Suomi,  which is Finland.
And the stamp-collector’s nightmare 
Which really make you despair
Are  Hungary which is  (really) Magyar
And Burma which is  (nearly)  Myanmar
I think I’ll never again collect   a stamp
In case I get geographical writer’s cramp.



Details | Monorhyme | |

Commodes Delight

All dressed in white 
In hopes I might be out of everyone's sight
I will fight for what is right
As long as others wont miss their targets sight
For one will feel more delight 
When they are relieved of their painfull plight 
And end up closing my commodes lid tight
And washes their hands with sheer delight
Before clearly leaving my commode's chair sight 



Wash Those Hands LOL


Also Entry For
Matt Caliri's 
Speak Chair Speak Contest
GL All


Details | Free verse | |

THE LINE

THE LINE

The Line 
There is something to be said for hunger 
A man gets stuck in line 
Becoming number 
Just living for the blessed TRAY of food 
Oh wonderfull food the institution gives to me 
But this is murder of the mind of a creator 
A poet and even a murder yes oh yes a murder 
Notice that eye said so very carefully not a MURDERER 
But eye said a murder 
A murder can be a flock of crows on a tall phone line 
Or a poet left behind 
Eye bet that not even one of the readers of this rhyme 
Even expected me to say that 
Oh ewe where was eye at? 
THE line oh yes the line 
 A man doing a little dance 
A tattoo of the prance 
Waiting just to eat 
He was giving it a beat 
A little rhythum with his legs bent 
Just bending at the knee 
And then a little up and down 
What’s up with that 
It made me wonder what was wrong with him 
The confederate in charge told me 
“That’s slim” 
He does that when he’s waiting in the line 
Just waiting in the line for food again 
He LIKES to eat 
HE likes THE LINE. 


Details | Couplet | |

Summer Fun

Sweat pants and wool socks
a hand-knitted scarf or two
warm mittens and hats
no doubt you think I’m nuts

Rosy cheeks and runny nose
soggy boots and frozen toes
chattering teeth and quivering knees
when I dream, it is of these

Down jackets now long packed away
skis and poles just taking up space
in my crowded messy garage
snow covered runs - just a mirage

Sun screen and flip flops
sunglasses and sticky pits
baseball caps and Thanksgiving in shorts
I despair of weather reports

How did I get to this eternal hell?
where A/C costs you a paycheck as well
where tender skin exposed continues to burn . . .
I just know somewhere I missed a turn.


Details | Haiku | |

haiku III

hunting made easy.
Does run, Bucks stay get shot.
men know no better!


Details | Bio | |

California Dreaming (In this case, a nightmare)

It was years ago,
I was younger and more fit,
I went to California,
And was soon scared out of my wit...

I decided to travel,
With family in tow,
Down the "Big Sur",
But I didn't know...

It was a ride into
A nightmare,
I was paralyzed with fear,
Driving on a road,
With death oh so near...

No guard rail in sight,
I near choked on my fright,
Steep cliff on my right,
My imagination took flight

Down into the abyss,
We surely would go,
Californian cars on my bumper,
My terror did ever grow

What do they want?
For me to dive off the cliff?
So they can rush to their goals,
Another five minutes the diff?

There came a pull over spot,
All the closer to doom,
I pulled over quick,
With hardly any room...

The endless traffic went by,
At fifty MPH or more,
I figured I was there,
Till I could no longer endure,

After what seemed endless hours,
I got back on the road,
Got off as soon as possible,
I had no need for a goad

I drove hundreds of miles inland,
In order to return,
To my hotel that day,
And I did learn

It's up to fools to dare,
Things they know not what they do,
And let me tell you,
Of me this was true.


Details | Haiku | |

Old Man Winter

top of old smokey
covered with frost - when bow breaks
old man winter blows


Details | Rhyme | |

Ellay

On the Coast, in the semitropics,
We feel strange with deciduous trees.
There's something about their nude branches
That reminds us of elbows and knees
And the bones of our bodies generally
With our organs, blood and skin.
We rely on Botox and banana trees
To lock our youthfulness in,
To ensure that we haven't a wrinkle,
To keep every season at bay.
Here we don't count the minutes or hours.
A year is the same as a day.
The Pacific fog rolls in at night,
And to glimpse the sky is so hard,
We prefer to admire the stars below
That are carved on our boulevard.
Throughout the Los Angeles basin
We do our aerobics and jog.
We are young, we are lean, we are healthy,
We intone as we gulp in the smog,
Which we wrap around us like a blanket
For security plus a disguise.
If sudden tears flow, nobody will know:
Heavy sunglasses shelter our eyes.


Details | Tanka | |

Wal-Mart

It is where you shop

everything is up for grabs

time everlasting

low prices are the key there

Sam knew what we all wanted


Details | I do not know? | |

Organic or Not...

Fields that flow into your space...
Does this move you...
What connection has been used...
Who are you...
Are you one with the organic...
You smell like a organic...
Adding fields around your space...
 Will this lead to the growth...
Organic or not ...
Man made...trouble...
And what laws are you following...
Nothing says you cannot grow...
A few might even tell you where...
What happens when your fields flow into anothers...space...
Can this controlled organic be stopped...
Who are you...
Are you one...like me...
Simplify organic...



Details | Sonnet | |

The Note

I was corner-stoned by many of you.
The note was dotted with a dash.
But this note was an ultimate smash.
I found a peephole and peeped through.
 
I found a bird gave him the note and away he flew,
Across the deserts and the valleys he was there in a flash,
Across the rivers and Oceans he made a great big splash.
He made it to the shore, but the note he began to chew.
 
He passed a timely test,
And his belly was full,
He did not stop to rest,
The note he had to pull.
 
The bird landed on the Oceans shore,
Singing praises of his rugged chore.


Details | Haiku | |

You Looking At Me

                                                       visitors flood park
                                            capture giraffe in marshland
                                                      looking down at them


Details | I do not know? | |

VALUABLE COUNTRY

Autumn Morning Country
The Morning Sky Aquamarine.
The Morning Sun Canary.
The Morning Clouds Pearls of White.
The Morning Birds Ruby Light.
The Morning Grass Emerald Green.
The Morning Leaves Smoky Quartz and Peridot.
The Morning Tree Trunks Citrine Light.
The Morning Smears of Snow Opal White.
The Morning Wind Constantly Clear.

Autumn Afternoon Country
The Afternoon Sky Aquamarine.
The Afternoon Sun Bright Canary.
The Afternoon Clouds Pearls of White.
The Afternoon Birds Rainbow Bright.
The Afternoon Grass Emerald Green.
The Afternoon Leaves Garnet Free.
The Afternoon Tree Trunks Heightened Citrine.
The Afternoon Snow Vanishes Away.
The Afternoon Wind Warming Sways.

Autumn Night Country
The Night Sky a Limitless Blanket of Onyx.
The Night Stars Scatters of Clear Diamonds.
The Afternoon Sun Concealed.
The Night Moon Revealed, a Ball of White Pearl.
The Night Clouds Smears of Tahitian Pearls.
The Night Owls Hues of Jasper and Carnelian.
The Night Grass Darkest of Emerald Color.
The Night Leaves Twirling Free in Dark Shadows.
The Night Tree Trunks Pilars of Darkest Citrine.
The Night Snow Heaving Falling of Akoyian Pearls.
The Night Wind Cooling Blows.


Details | I do not know? | |

Called To Write And Other Duties

Been typing and writing
Enjoying sunrises
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flew the week
Dust collecting in
Corners, dirty dishes
In the sink
Duty called my name
I tell you it's a shame
What is the green 
Stuff in the bottom
It's not tame!


Details | I do not know? | |

Locked Up In Jail

It isn't any fun
being locked up in jail.
Sitting all by my lonesome
in this cracker box cell.

The bed is too hard
and I never really rest.
I asked for a pillow
but they denied my request.

I go to sleep hungry
because the food is so rotten.
I never see a soul,
it seems I've been forgotten.

I'd try to escape
if I thought that I could.
But here in this jail,
I'm locked up pretty good.


Details | Bio | |

Mini-Bar

Another true tom tale:

It was 1984,
Long ago I know,
That I had the urge to travel
And to San Francisco
I did go

With wife and two sons
We had reservations
At a classy hotel indeed,
And at $279. a night,
You'd think you they'd feed

The room was nice,
though small,
The price did shock me so,
Because until we got there
The price I did not know

Long flight, long day,
We were tired, 
and settled for the night,
Turned on the TV
And then did notice I,
A small refrigerator...
I wondered the reason why

A key that we had gotten
Opened up real quick
And what I found inside
Made me realize I was a "hick"

Inside beer, soda, scotch
Candy, treats of every kind
Well, at $279. a night,
I figured this was just fine

We had a feast, 
I had several drinks
I thought how thoughtful
But somewhere in the back
of my mind
I hoped it was no jinx

Next morning at 
the included breakfast buffet,
Somehow I mentioned
to another guest,
How nice the in-room
refrigerator provisions
seemed, 
he looked at me
like some crawling pest

"Those are not free!"
He informed me
"You pay for every bit,
And at the prices of
this hotel,
You might be in deep sh_t"

Well we checked out
right after breakfast,
Had to wait as
They took a mini-bar
inventory
Seems we had consumed
$86.00 worth
Of what we thought was totally free!


Details | Free verse | |

Great Photo Tag Show!!!

Taking photographs is really great
 Ideally this snapper has such taste
  Moved between Oakland and DC
   So that’s the way it’s gonna be 
    By diving into his poetic blog
     Will undo your writer’s clog
      Read his lines and you will find
       Every syllable is truly refined
        With words of hope for the soul
         Leaves the reader with stories untold
          Yes, William poetry also has zest 
           Now he is being put to the real test
            Hello my friend William Jones
             We are here to pick some bones
              You better raise the white flag
               Because you have just been tagged!




Comments:  Okay Bill, I was tagged by Carol Brown.  As a result, I have to pass 
the tag along.   Your name is on the top of the list.  Your poetry is just wonderful!  
Now, you must find a poet whose poetry you enjoy reading, and tag that poet with 
a poem.  Man, aren’t we having fun!  Chau!


Details | Rhyme | |

ANDY WARHOL WAS MY NEIGHBOR

9 East 32nd Street
Between 5th and 6th Avenue
In New York City.
My apartment was 3C
On the same block,
Andy ran his “Factory”.
Saw him frequently
Looking his visual self,
Me an SVA art student
Living with my cat
And no one else.
We crossed each other one afternoon,
Andy gave me a free copy
Of his magazine “Interview”.
23 years later I’m thinking
Instead of taking it 
And going my way,
If I had asked Andy his autograph
God knows the value 
That copy would have today.


Details | ABC | |

ELECTORAL VOTE

Well look at all the new ones looking for a dance
they're hiding on the network looking for romance
  Half of them have boy friends, some of them have wives
  all of them complaining about their lonely lives
Now don't misunderstand me, I've often fell in line
but I get tired of dancing and playing all the time
  
  I'm so tired to prove that I am not a jerk
  while all the time inside of me, there's a monster on the lurk
I think that's true in all of us but we try to hide it all
the doctors have a medicine for all the things it's called
  We simply must be perfect, we never are to blame
  I think it's just the world we're in where little stays the same.

If you should point your finger, is it reflection that you see
maybe what your looking at is just as bad as me
  I say don't even trip it, were all just struggling to survive
  we all just do the best we can to help us stay alive
can someone give me real and stimulate my mind
I'm tired of circle jerking to the same old bump and grind


Details | I do not know? | |

Florida Turkey

We will be visiting the land of the sun.
To see our little girl and have some fun.
We are going to have, Florida Turkey to eat.
While we all go shopping for black friday treat.
It will be a quick trip,only a week we will spend.
Family get togethers are almost a forgotten trend.
Feasting together, I know we will get our fill.
Shopping with both, my daughter and wife till.
Truly there will be many stories, that will thrill.
I was told if I did not go, my body she will kill.
Within this little poem of my journey to come.
I wish, poetry soup, Happy Thankgiving, from,
This humble and learning poet, to everyone.
Now it is off we go, to the land of the sun.



Details | Free verse | |

Joseph's Merry Christmas Poetic Tag

It’s now dawn and the sky is ocean blue
Bringing to mind a poet who is so true
Writing with pen and ink in every round 
With a Christmas name as Carol Brown

Around the corner moving in a rush
Teaching away with her poetic thrust
There in the flakes was Tamiviolet
Words flowing like a story booklet

On a platform was Vince Suzadail
Being hailed by many for setting a trail
Out came the sun with Jean Marchese
Painting picture so cool and breezy

Feet getting weary there was Karen O’Leary
So cheery while reciting a poetic theory
Wearing fancy socks was James Baylock
Standing on a rock just teaching his flock

Heading home for warmth of the fireplace
Thinking of the next journey I will face 
Do I hear jingles and slay bells in the air?
Oh my, it’s my friend Santa we are a pair! 

Merry Christmas!




Comments:  I was tagged by Kathy, and as a result I have to pass the tag along.
I have randomly tagged the first six poets in my head.  I really enjoy reading their 
poetry.  Now, they can tag other poets they enjoy reading. Have a great day!


Details | Burlesque | |

LIVING LAVISHLY OR SPARINGLY

Rich people can afford to live lavishly,
squandenring money like it werent a commodity;
ordinary folks must make ends meet,
even worrying about the food they eat!

Wealth moguls like Trump or Gates
can purchase the Empire State Building,
and see their names in the Entrepreneur or Money magazine...
while we dispute those outrageous credit card rates!
 
Since Caesar imposed taxes on the Roman Empire,
freedom to spend,at will, has been reduced by desire;
now Uncle Sam is the new emperor demanding his tribute,
woe to us if we declared ourselves immune!  

Republicans and Democrats are divided on one issue:
the Iraq's war on terrorism and its credibility not so true;
while Bush's voice echoes throughout the White House' walls..
a President's courage shown in formidable ways!

The music and art world are giving in frivolity,
creating works that are insignificant and full of obscenity;
can the Human Race excel as it did yesterday...
who will step forward and stop all this insanity?

Living lavishly is only shared by the lucky ones 
who are defined by abundance and inheritance,
but living sparingly is based on sacrifice and endurance...  
learning those thrifty tactics and live within limits!
         


Details | I do not know? | |

am i crazy

i am not satisfied with where i have to call 
home . it stinks , most of the time . my 
neighbor is a real asshole . my roommate gets to
have most of the fun.. in palm, pink, red or even brown eye .

i think i may be in the u.s. navy . i keep hearing
stories of navel and semen . it's always dark
here , i very rarely get out and about . crap ,
what are u doing , this isn't an amusement park ...

it seems i get the worst of everything ...hit ,
scratched , sometimes he even shaves me . if i am
lucky , i can get licked once in a while . i know
you think i complain alot , but i don't give a damn .

down in the dumps , i feel blue . the moment i
actually get to see daylight , a snap ..the zipper shuts.
everything is wrong , just seems out of place .
i don't know , maybe i am just ......nuts .




Details | Burlesque | |

Where Am I?

Hey, I'm a NYC guy...
Where am I?
What's these tall green things all over?
How they get in the way of another begoda...
And,  this air, smells so funny,
Where's the soot, the grime,??
It's even sunny!
And where's the crime?
Haven't had a house break-in yet,
I'm starting to pine...
Where they hidin' all the buses?
The subway I can't find...
I'm startin' to think...
I'm losin' m mind..
And these huge bumps in the ground..
Are they ground mumps?
And the puddles so big...
I'm amazed what they do..
To cross those puddles,
They use a canoe!
Maybe I'm just confused,
With vision that's bad...
But this is the worst nightmare,
I've ever had...
My God, ya' gotta drive to find a MacDonald's...
And that makes me whine...
Ain't these yokels 'bout's here,
Know how to fine dine?
And the people are weird,
They must be quite sick,
They're walkin' around smiling,
Like they found a crack stick...
Think I'm gona go back home,
To NYC,
Where I understand things,
And I can be me.


Details | I do not know? | |

A Skeeter Hit My Windshield

A skeeter hit my windshield,
This I surely knew.
He flew across in front of me
As many skeeters do.

The skeeter that hit my windshield
Was a frisky little dude!
He wanted to ride with me, I reckon
But what a way to intrude!

In Lonoke County, Arkansas,
Where skeeters are known to be.
Is where I ran over this overgrown bug
Or he tried to run over me.

If you’re not from this area, you wouldn’t know,
But please try to understand.
There’s some big ol’ skeeters here in Arkansas
Some only a fraction as big as a man.

An Arkansas skeeter hit my windshield,
Boy he made a big ol’ thump.
When these skeeter hit your windshield
You’ll think you hit a speed bump!


Details | Rhyme | |

Off The Road Again

Off the road again
Just our ATV's 
And some good friends
Hitting the trails 
And winding bends
Starting and Making
Some new and different trends
On our ATV's once again
Cleaning the mud and gunk
From our teeth that just blends
With our armor that continues to defend
The king of off road that just wants to send
A here's mud in your eye to all 
My good buddies and friends




Tribute To ATV's
Here's Mud In Your Eye   LOL


Love Kathy & Jenny
Maybe Next Song Too


Details | Free verse | |

Backseat Driver

Providence
That’s where we were going
Just to get a tattoo
At the zenith of daybreak
We drove down early to
Get there when they opened
Easy, right?
Ho-No!
Your directions made me
Dazed and confused
I could comprehend nuclear physics
Better than your map
And when I took a wrong turn
You should have just put me on
Trial than subject me to the verbal
Barrage you spewed
You’d think Mercury was careening
Into Earth ready to make ghosts
Of us all
Could we foster a truce
Just so we could find our way
Back home again?


Details | Couplet | |

Eerie, Beery Night

After one too many beers, in the wee hours of the night,
I whizzed around town in my motorbike, feeling light;

     I zoomed into a dark side street and who or what did I meet
     but potholes, like drunk hobos, recklessly crossing the street!

I ran over some of them, they fought back and  muddied me,
made me swerve and splash into murky puddles I couldn't see.

     I stopped to catch my breath on the black deserted highway
     by my bike, the only one that stood by me, I should say;

but nastier than potholes, the asphalt was a different case,
it leaped and stood bolt upright and slammed hard against my face;

     In a split-second eternity, I swam the eerie border
     of the real and the unreal,  this beery night to remember !


Details | Limerick | |

UP SIDE DOWN

His name is Orion P. Gunder;
He was born in Australia-- Down under.
It has often been said
He can stand on his head.
But think where he’s from. It’s no wonder! 


Details | I do not know? | |

Road Rage

I board my little metal box early in the dawn,
Adjust my seat, fix my mirror, turn the stereo on,
I love the drive, I live for the day,
And I am generally  accepting,
Of all those little experiences,
 Life shares with me along the way.

Check my mirrors, watch my speed,
Keep that safe distance that all drivers need,
Tense up my neck, stare into the next car,
Give people intense looks from near, and from afar.
All of the sudden, something within me jumps out,
Did I just curse, did I actually shout?

I’m only going from here to there, just a simple commute,
But there is a collective static that I cannot dispute,
As I glance at the other drivers, with that protruding vein,
From all of the anger, stress, and strain.
They all look like the angry guy in my mirror,
That is staring them right back again.

Break checking, tail gating, horns blowing,
And all of those one fingered salutes,
That my fellow drivers are showing.
Have I lost my mind? Is the traffic beginning to slow?,
Did I just call that little old lady,
A bloated warthog for not staying with the flow?

I finally reached my destination and my patience is gone,
My nerves shot, my anger boiling over, as the day wears on.
Why Oh why do I love to drive,
When just getting there wrecks my day?
I cant point the finger and blame others for my anger,
When I reacted in exactly the same way.

There is a solution to this though, 
There is more than one way out,
There is a way to have a good day to this you may score,
Have others drive so you can talk,
Leave earlier and walk,
And of course, that is what a bus route is for.




Details | Haiku | |

I'm Wading For You

                                                         visitors flood park
                                                 capture bear wading in den
                                                         applauses given


Details | I do not know? | |

ON THE BAYOU

Louisiana Cajuns 
Eatin'  hot cornbread,  
Chompin' aligator tail 
And suckin' crawfish heads.
Eatin' jambalaya 
And gumbo stew:
Gourmand, Sunday dinner,
On the old bayou.  


Details | Free verse | |

New York

Bull Rider of Day and Night
Sperm of Population, Home of Insomnia
Place of Yellow Cabs and Nation's NASDAQ's Business
Highlife, Loud, Crime
City of making it Big:
When I am there I am told that you are strong, for I have seen NYPD Blue sirens 
everywhere, catching what might harm you or me.
I see the night approach as to cover me with blindness: Yeah in my mind crime 
might come for me.
Yet you are a Big Apple, and that apples are good for me: yet you are the Big 
Apple that has so much poison.
Is there away for me to escape the worm that may make me sick, and bite into a 
better Big Apple:
I feel confined like I am in a box with no way out I need my South for comfort,
High Sky Scrapers with flashy lights like among Las Veges show lights, you look 
Bold,and are in an A class line:
Tough as steel like Philadelphia's Arch, Sneaky as a King Cobra,
Open Arms,
Wonderful Shops,
Havoc Traffic,
Block Parties,
Big Bridges, Little Bridges, Over Rises,
Mostly clear starynites, like bling bling earrings, shine like high beams on a car.
Moments of terrible Migraines of the city with too many lights.
Land of many possibilities of many jobs and Famous Celebrities.
Hooray!!!!
Wonderful Place of Famous Baseball Teams, Snowy Winters, Homeless people 
Begging, Home of Greed to the Bull Rider, of Day and Night, Sperm of 
Population, Home of Insomnia and Place of Yellow Cabs, and Nations.


Details | Senryu | |

Oh My Food! (Senryu)

fly crushed onto glass 
lost, trapped, can’t find its way out 
buzzed for help but zapped! 



Details | Ballade | |

Picking And A Grinning { Bluegrass}

                                            When we all get to Heaven
                                                 You may see me walkin'
                                              Here there everywhere
                                  For I'm just a blue ridge mountain boy
                             thumbing for a ride down a lonely banjo road
                        With old Joe Clark livin just' two doors down from me
                                         Leaning on the everlasting arms
                                          Of his sweet Tennessee Rose gal
                                                If teardrops were pennies
                                         I could buy two more bottles of wine
                                                 So  please Mr. Sandman
                                              I'm crying my heart out over you
                                                     For this is all I can do
                                          As I pick these bluegrass banjo blues
                                         From my Tennessee Mountain home roads
                                                           That I once knew
                                      
                                           


Just A Bluegrass song
working on  LOL


Details | I do not know? | |

Window shopping

   Girl I am window shopper got 3 or 4 guys I think I wanna try but I aint gonna holla i'm just going 
to keep juggling them and play this game it's kind of fun. Guys are kinda of funny if you think 
about them you can lie right to their face and they think your innocent. But they don't  know what 
else you been doing. Who else you been seeing... So many other stores that you be in.  You just 
give them a little smile and call them once and while and they start getting all excited thinking 
your their girl when you have other options and your playing them. But they don't  know and 
that's the funny thing they are so dumb when it comes to what women need and want. So let 
me try to explain.  Boy i'm a window shopper i'll write down your number that don't mean i'm 
going to call ya. Boy i'm a window shopper I'll try you out but i'll leave  you in the store if I don't 
like ya. See the color of my face is yellow and at night I still shine bright like a nightlight it's funny 
how many guys want to try this and I still ignore all their graphic comments. Be a real man and 
do something good to impress me and maybe I will turn back around and do some extra 
browsing. Saying hey shorty may get my attention and your style might have me melting but I 
gotta admit that I won't persue it if it aint in my interest to do it.  Cause i'm a window shopper 
being independent is just in my nature. If you want to explore my world than baby you need to 
offer me something better than pay less. Cause i'm a window shopper. Better known as a 
player under cover. Shy girls have fun too... now you know the truth.


Details | Rhyme | |

Cash ID

"Credit or debit" the cashier asked
On my last trip to the store
"Cash" says I and got a funny look
Says she,"No one uses cash anymore
 
 "I know my money's good", says I
"I worked hard enough to make it
And I'll just go to another store
If you don't want to take it."
 
"No," says she "I can take it
But for your information
Before  I do I will need
A picture identification." 


Details | Rhyme | |

Hee Haw


                                             Hee Haw

                                             Hee Haw

                                    Come join Buck and Roy 
                                for some picking and grinning 
                                             for us all

                                             Hee Haw

                                             Hee Haw

                                    Now look at Junior and Lula
                                        Giving a big salute
                                   from the corn fields so tall

                                            Hee Haw
                                              
                                            Hee Haw

                       There goes Granpa Jone and String Bean
                                 Slapping their chest and knees
                             To a banjo and a harmonica's call

                                            Hee Haw

                                            Hee Haw

                                 Let's listen to Jim and John
                                    Sernading to the gals
                               of Kornfield's lumber shaw

                                           Hee Haw

                                           Hee Haw

                         Now don't forget about Minnie Pearl
                            and her straw hat with tag
                    swinging in the breeze from a yodel caw

                                          Hee Haw

                                          Hee Haw

                     Well folks it's time to wrap up this salute 
                          for all those who gave it their all
                        from the wacked out show known as 

                                            Hee Haw

                                            Hee Haw






Tribute To 
The Cast And Crew Of
Hee Haw



Thanks For The Laughs




RIP 
Buck Owens


Details | I do not know? | |

BOILING BARLEY

Burly Farley Foley bought a field at Brawley,           
On Southern California's sunny soil.
There, farmer Farley Foley grew a crop of barley,               
And bought a boiler just to make the barley boil.           


Details | Free verse | |

Crab Feast (Nonet)

It runs gracefully across the sand 
Feet leaving prints as it passes 
Gracefully moves its own way 
Delicacy for some 
It’s now on the run 
Dashing for hole 
Peppered spice 
It’s hot 
Crabs!


Details | Rhyme | |

Rhyme and Reason

A pen in my right hand, 
And I am off to la-la land.
I’m zipping through the zoo,
Or just passing by you!

Poetsville is a city to be,
There are great big trees.
Homes are huge there.
Rhyme and reason are pretty fair.

Little people dance in the streets,
Shuffling their tiny little feet’s!
Always a song and always a voice,
Lyrics dangle in the breeze by choice.

There is always a Rhyme with a Reason,
Sprinkling rainbows for the next season!
Rain or shine the poet knows how,
To turn it around making words that wow.

There are deserts and oceans by the shore,
You can count them one, two, three and four.
It is a rhyme and reason just for being,
Right side up with what you are seeing.

So off to la-la Land I will be,
Just my pen and just me!

®Registered: Ann Rich   2006


Details | I do not know? | |

CARNIVAL

He traveled down from Arkansas,
To New Orleans, for Mardi Gras.
"One evening of abandonment,"
That's what his trusted friends say,
"He frolicked on Fat Tuesday night,
And repented on Ash Wednesday."            


Details | Terza Rima | |

The Hypochondriac

Hey, bud, I see 
you've got this 
weird type of paranoia,

    fearfully believing 
    that all the  germs 
    are scheming to kill ya,

that's why you don't 
trust bottled water, 
not even tequila;

    and you rely so much 
    on the power 
    of  your disinfectant,

toward a slight smudge 
on the doorknob 
you're intolerant

    because to you it's 
    the plague 
    lying there lethally dormant;


nothing wrong with 
being sanitary, 
with being hygienic,

    but yours is a worrisome 
    worrying, bordering 
    on the psychotic,

soon you'll be scared 
of inhaling air, 
boy, that's gonna be tragic!


Details | Free verse | |

Relaxing on the Beach

Oh, the taste of sweet mangoes 
While relaxing on a Caribbean beach.
Such a refreshing way to watch the sun 
Setting on the blue and calm horizon.

This sweet mango is such an appetizer 
Preparing the pallet for the main course.
Stimulating one’s stomach for a feast 
With visions of the coming dish, 
The main flavor of the day.


Oh, I like tasty mangoes 
The setting sun, and 
Caribbean beaches.


Details | I do not know? | |

THE CALICO DRAGON

A lady I know,
Out in New Mexico,
Befriended a calico dragon.
She used to haul him around
Old Santa Fe town,
In her convertible Ford station wagon


Details | I do not know? | |

Crazy Town

Crazy woman in the bookstore
Won’t leave me alone
Asks me non-stop questions
Why won’t she go home?

Tells me her ex-husband says she’s fat
Then proceeds to ask me the same
She is overweight 
But my approach is tame

I try to be nice
And tell her what she wants to hear
At the same time I try to blow her off
But to her this isn’t clear

So she keeps at me
Just won’t leave me alone
I try to look as busy as possible
Why won’t she go home?


Details | Senryu | |

Days of Our Lives (Senryu)

On their wedding day
“The Days of Our Lives” was played
Congregation laughed


© Joseph, 9/20/07
© All Rights Reserved


I wrote this while attending a wedding.  This is serious! lol!  The traditional or 
classic Japanese senryu format has three lines:  the first has 
five syllables, second has seven syllables and the third five syllables.  The 
pattern is 5/7/5 for a total of seventeen syllables. The senryu is generally about 
an emotional expression.



Details | Quatrain | |

The Vacant Eye

Blinded as a child, 
by a rock thrown at my eye
The pain was great, I'd demonstrate, 
but I'd hate to make you cry
I found a marble on the street
and figured it would do
Popped it in that vacancy
so I could stare at you
Now 'scuse me sir, it's rude to gawk
at someone else's head
even if my real eye's green
and the other crimson red.
Beggar's can't be choosers,
that's what I've always known
This shiny red is better still
than just plain hollow bone
Now turn away and eat your soup
you perfect featured fellow
Be glad your eyes are real and match-
They could be blue and yellow...


Details | Rhyme | |

Art Can Hurt

A wise-cracking tourist in a Greek art gallery
keeps heckling the cute curator with an inquiry;

      why, he asks her, the muscularly athletic gods
      and demigods, supposed to be sturdy like steel rods,

      often appear softy, un-masculine and are shown
      wearing skimpy, see-through clothing they've outgrown,

      as they stand, run or fight in poses effeminate:
      Zeus whimsically choosing thunderbolts from a plate,

      and god of war, Ares, striking a lethal sword blow
      with graceful arms, dainty fingers and a ballet toe;

      Apollo standing like he has just smoothly curtsied,
      as Achilles waltzes through a combat he fancied.

The irked curator says it's not her obligation
to fill the gaps in the tourist's art education !


Details | I do not know? | |

PISCATAWAY

It happened in New Jersey,
On a rainy night in May:
They stuffed it in a Hackensack,
And hauled the wet Piscataway.
                                             
They hauled it up to Michigan,
Which they knew they shouldn’t do.
There, near the town of Battle Creek,
They locked it in Kalamazoo.
                                             
But then, there came a Hackenteam,
Along the dark Piscatatrack, 
And, speeding down the Hackenway,
They brought the glad Piscataback.  


Details | Senryu | |

Army PR Term


no, that's not retreat,

tactical withdrawal, that's it,

foes call it defeat !


Details | Ballad | |

THE JUNGLE

30,000 insect species per mile, 
half of them in my space 
whirr of wings, 
none of whch make me smile 

Hot fetid air 
decay of leaves 
humidity overwhelms me 
i cannot breathe 

Dense impenetrable green, 
rank pools of water 
holds things i have never seen 

The twitter and call of things unseen 
leaves much to the imagination 
my wild thrashings, 
my curses and condemnation 

Leafy clutter abounds every where 
yet nothing is wasted 
nature's powerhouse recycled 
every thing eaten,everything tasted 

Dark gloom of triple canopy, 
day like night 
night,stygian darkness 
terrifies me 

For the jungle man has no place,nothing 
for the jungle,the insects are king 

Frogs croak,hidden things chatter 
flash of colour,nothing seen 
stench of decayed matter, 
everything green 

Hot jungle,constant drip of water, 
razor sharp bamboo, 
makes me falter 

This moving green mass holds me in its web, 
the 30,000 insects, 
i dread 

Time to go quickly, 
for i am not of the jungle, 
which makes me poor and sickly 

Leave,for the 30,000 insects have evicted me 
dont worry,i'll go you'll see 
whirr of wing 
croak of frog 
escapes me 


Details | ABC | |

Mr. Rogers In Da Hood

Once you enter his world there's no going back 
It has been reported Mr. Trolley is off the tracks 
A zip of the sweater and a flip of the shoe 
BB King will stop by and sing some blues 
His friends visit him and tell him he's got it so good 
The news is out Mr. Rogers is in da hood 
The doorbell rings, who is the mystery guest? 
Paris and Nicole, this is going to be a mess 
He asks Nicole; Whose the Daddy 
She answers in a voice very sadly 
It could a number of useless men 
I can't answer the five questions, who, why, what, where or when 
Too much pressure on the girls, so they go back to Hollywood 
You cannot outsmart Mr. Roogers, he owns da hood 
Barney Fife stops by for a spell 
A bully has threatened him, he looks pale 
Mr. Rogers grabs a bat and says bullies just aren't no good 
You are safe as long as I am in da hood 
Now everyone can sleep in peace 
You have Andy, Barney and Mr. Rogers, the dream police 
The three track down a criminal in Kryler Woods 
There's a new sheriff in town, Mr. Rogers is in da hood


Details | Narrative | |

Laundromat Sonata

Thump, thump, thump
must be sneakers in the dryer.
Clunk, clunk, clunk
washers changing cycles.
Musaks in the laundromat
make it impossible to read that
novel which had you spellbound,
but you brought it and found
the metallic clattering kachung, kachung
of the change dispenser
(souding like winning slot machines)
is not music to read by.

Thump, clunk, kachung
Wet mops that are hung
to drip on the pop-splattered floor.
Running, yelling kids or
zonked-out junkies bid
for your attention.
Attention!  Attention!
We're doing laundry in here,
this is not a reading room
with soap overflowing,
and the clothes still wet
after the dryer ate your last cent.

Thump, clunk, kachung.
Lets get finished with this chore
and get the _ _ _ _ out the door!


Details | Rhyme | |

Familiar Beauty

Outstretched there, on the golden sand
Heavenly body, must give her my hand
Trying to reach her places with lotion
As she laid on the sand, there at the ocean

She didn’t know me, nor even that I saw
Her problem persisted, though nary a flaw
She just couldn’t reach the places on her back
That the hands of this man could surely attack

I went over to ask her if I could assist
She squinted at first and then told me this,
“That would be great, can you really, please?”
With a smile on my face, I fell to my knees

We started to talk there, for so many hours
Even when leaving at the beaches cool showers
It seems she grew up in a neighborhood not far
So I offered to take her home in my car

Hesitant at first, but then she complied
She gave into persistence, so I gave her a ride
I pulled to a block I knew from my past
Then in front of her house, my stomach sunk fast

It seems that this angel, this beauty, this queen
Was someone I knew, but never had seen
She leaned into kiss me, when I then pulled back
At the fear of then having a big heart attack

See, the house there I knew, I’d seen once before
Belonging to an aunt, distant, with contact no more
The girl then, logically, was a cousin of mine
I then cursed the world because she was so fine

The moral of this story then translates to be
Don’t talk to any stranger you happen to see
Be careful, assess, ask questions, then be quite sure
If you’re kissing a cousin, it’s not quite a score.


No, this never happened, but imagine - ooh!


Details | I do not know? | |

Stuck Behind The Till (2003)

I’m stuck behind the till
Daydreaming and thinking until…
The whole world seems to be moving while I’m standing still
On top I’m gliding merrily through a muddy lake
But underneath I’m paddling so hard with no break
Its all give and no take
I’ll keep wishing until….
But in the meantime I’m stuck being the till

poemsbyrb@hotmail.com


Details | I do not know? | |

COMING AND GOING

I just returned
From where I've been.
From here to there,
And back again.
                                    
I saw everything,
From A to Z,
Across this land,
From sea to sea.
                                    
From upside-down,
To inside out.
From stem to stern.
From tail to snout.
                                                     
From east to west;
From north to south.
I earned my bread--
From hand to mouth.
                                    
From low to high,
From white to black.
I've been everywhere
And I'm going back.


Details | Lyric | |

Starbucks Sucks

What’s so grand?
It’s just another trend
And unlike every other friend,
I refuse to give in
Oh, okay, so it’s gourmet
I don’t care what you call it
I refuse to allow them
to sit here and rape my wallet
Why does a tall look so small?
There’s nothing grand about it at all
Starbucks simply sucks


Details | Lyric | |

Bittersweet City of Pain

The darkened city
fades in the background
just like you wished your feelings would
It’s been a long year
longer than you’d like to live
It’s hard to forget
how things were
just a few months ago
And it’s hard to remember
how things were before
It’s funny how
how quickly people change
It’s funny how
how quickly she could change
And it’s funny how
how things never stay the same
And it’s funny how
She promised Heaven
but gave as much Hell as she could
Finally woke up
to see the stinging truth
To see the lies
in her empty smiles
Finally woke up
to hear the burning truth
To hear the emptiness
in her “I love you”s
Finally woke up 
to feel the death she dealt
To feel the coldness in her heart
The new year is coming
but will this one finally become the past?
A would-be anniversary
spent in nostalgia and depression
Amnesia is a blessing
you would gladly accept
to escape this fate
You’d trade a fortune
to erase the misfortune
she gave to you
You’d trade a fortune
to erase the time
she spent with you
You’d trade a fortune
to have her fall in love with you
like you thought she did before
But she’s long gone
and fading behind you
She’s in the city
but she’s still on your mind
If you could just leave your thoughts
in her apartment
you surely would
For now it’s so long bittersweet city of pain
Maybe you’ll be back 
when all your thoughts of her
have been washed away with the rain


Details | Free verse | |

An Oval of One

An Oval of One 
'Wind In My Ear' is fourth. 
'Glowing Thomas' is in  third place. 
To ewe that is show. 
'Inching Foward' is placeing. 
Second place to ewe. 
'Gnashing Oats' has taken the lead. 
--and-- 
around the last turn: 
'Glowing Thomas'is now fourth. 
'Wind In My Ear' has made her move. 
She is for show. 
'Gnashing Oats' has fallen away. 
She will place today. 
'Inching Forward' has beaten them all. 
She is in first place. 
An Oval of one. 
Horseracing is fun.


Details | I do not know? | |

NERVOUS

When Tarzan swung home
To his house in a tree,             
His nerves were all shot;
He was tense as could be.
                                                     
His little wife wondered,
"What's eating you, dear?"
The ape-man said, "Jane,
It's a jungle out there!"


Details | Free verse | |

The Priority

THE PRIORITY 
They strut and preen the students of life 
They try very hard to from a priority of one  but only in mass numbers can they 
force me from my temporary home the computer in the lieberry is where eye write 
all mye poems from and although eye am not a genious eye am a poet as most 
of ewe will agree in the poetical realm of statemans land the places that eye visit 
in my mind are better learned and softly written into WORD 
Upon the keYboard of the DELL is where eye want to bee 
When eye have a poem to interest ewe and mabe me. 


Details | Free verse | |

World Peace

From Andover to Anaheim
Bangor to Boise
People speak up
Come on, get noisy

From Carteret in Jersey
To Cameroon far away
Speak up everyone
If just for one day

From Detroit to Dallas
Eaton to Ecuador
Come on everyone
Speak up some more

From France and to Finland
Ghana to Greece
People speak up
To bring about peace

From Halifax to Haiti
Indiana to Iraq
If we all scream up
Peace might just come back

Jerusalem to Jersey
Killarney to Kildare
Peace can resurface
If together we share

Lisbon to Lima
Michigan to Maine
Let’s make one voice
For peace is the gain

Netherlands to New England
Oahu to Oslo
Come on everyone
Let’s give it a go

Poland to Pittsburgh
Queens to Qatar
With peace in our pockets
We all can go far

Roxbury to Riverhead
Salisbury to Siam
We’ll acquire the peace
Just as we plan

Togo and Tobago
Uruguay to Ulster
It can all come true
If we’re ready to muster

Venezuela to Venice
Wyoming to Whales
Keep peace in our sights
Our plan will not fail

To get to our Xanadu
We just cannot stop
Keep screaming for peace
We’ll soon see the top

Yugoslavia to Yemen
Zimbabwe to Zaire
Once peace has been gotten
We’ll have nothing to fear

Come on everyone! Scream!


Details | Free verse | |

Life In The Dead Sea

Between Jordan and Israel lies the Dead Sea 
biblically known as Sodom and Gomorrha, 
salty waters where no living thing breathes 
and no known fish in its currents frolicks. 

Just how salty is the Dead Sea? 
take a bucket and fill half of it with salt, 
add an equal amount of water, then stir it; 
that could not be sweet, would you agree? 

I took a dip that burned my eyes red in the sea of the dead, 
its density making this non-swimmer float like I was dead,
I just could not sink! 

If you suffer from high blood pressure don't you swim there, 
take heed from one that the doctor advised of salt to beware, 
who did not listen to his medical advice and dived anyway 
and what did I get? systolic and diastolic counts of 150/110 
that meant more Tenormin pills to keep a heart attack away.

Salts form into solid rocks along the Dead Sea's shore
and just about everywhere are gigantic white crystals; 
a harsh, non life-giving body of water, maybe? 

Not exactly!
because the sediments of the Dead Sea is a cottage industry; 
scoop up a mound of black mud, rub it on your face and body, 
presto! you will get skin smoother than a baby's bottom! 
due to dissolved chemicals with therapeutic properties
that smoothen, cleanse and purify a crocodile’s skin. 

Wanna buy a bar of soap made out of Dead Sea mud? 
Hurry, first come, first served, stock is limited!