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Funny History Poems | Funny Poems About History

These Funny History poems are examples of Funny poems about History. These are the best examples of Funny History poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Clerihew | |

Battle of the Sexes

battle of the sexes

Picture Oil painting worthwhile 
Leonardo DA Vinci, look out!
What is she really smiling about?

(((The popularity of the Mona Lisa increased in the mid 19th century 
because of the Symbolist movement. The painting was thought to 
encompass a sort of feminine mystique.)))

His award winning voice, rough like stones
Darth Vader, Mufasa, stuttering jubilee  
When I die can he be the one narrating my eulogy?

(((I love James, I'm a star wars freak... <--- yup that's me)))

Were very bad, bad men
Causing chaos throughout America & Afghanistan,
HATERS OF THE USA: they should be called the Arab ku klux klan

(((Occupation: Terrorist~ makes me wonder if they went to the same school.)))

The world worse killer
Commander of the oxymoron  Nazi  
Losing at his own game of Yahtzee 

(((The Most Hated Murderer of all time)))

Her diary worth more than any bank
Famous Jewish victims of the Holocaust
Her legacy teaches that hate is an exhaust 

(((Anne Frank's diary remains one of the most moving and widely read 
accounts of the Jewish experience during the Holocaust.))) 

Angel in an era so dark
an epic hundred year war
her visions is what she payed for.

(((Joan of Arc, also called the Maid of Orleans, a patron saint of France 
and a national heroine, led the resistance to the English invasion.))) 

Can really sing
Stand by me...
But, can he sting like a bee

(((BB KING~ could not help but wonder if he was a lover and a fighter.)))

Is no piano sonata,
Madonna wannabe, is she.
Watching her videos make me laugh till I pee.

(((Lady Gaga is Unique as can be!)))


for battle of the clerihew

Details | I do not know? | |


I have a wandering mind
my lines as I draw them
over the grid as I steer them
through intersections
I veer them
perspectives I see
when I peer them...
detecting truth
in the dots as I hear them

A gentle Awe
the sound of pause
soft sings from my pen
when the lines are drawn
and my mind goes wandering...

About U
My artful perception.

56 signed.The Declaration...

Details | I do not know? | |


I never wanted it to be this way, I never wanted to feel the pain. Bruises all over me. 
Invisible but I can see them.

You hurt me everywhere. My heart is shattered and the blood has frozen. But I won't be 
your victim.

Stare at me like this all you want. Try and hurt me with your words just as long as you 
don't use fists.

I don't ever want to be your victim. I refuse to be one of those few girls who end up 
losing their whole world.

Love isn't supposed to hurt, but maybe I was just naive because the moment I loved you my 
heart never stopped bleeding. 

I won't be your victim, I won't run away. If you have something to say I won't avoid it. 
I'm not scared I can take whatever you try to throw.

Don't hold back I promise you I will not cry. The moon is shining just like all the 
diamonds that you called pretend love I can't even imagine why I fell so hard.

It's never clear until the glass of water is gone. But now that you've gulped me to the 
last I want you to know I won't be your victim.

I kissed vulnerability goodbye the very last time I cried over you and I won't be your 
victim your not even worth it.

If you feel like you must shove a door in my butt but don't make me afraid because I 
don't want to be I don't want to be your victim. 

Let go of my hand so I can peacefully drive away if you want me to I can drive over you 
as well. But don't make it seem like i'm causing you pain because it's obvious to see 
that I've been a victim and it's a shame.

But I don't want to be it anymore then you so just let me go and I won't have to run. I 
promised you forever I laugh at this now you were never eternity love in my mind.

 I kept counting until the madness in ourselves would corrupt. Tears flash down my eyes 
as I speed down the lanes. Two bottles of Gin and I think i'm going insane.

It wasn't until I crashed into a tree that I realized I was never your victim I was 
merely your suicide mission. 

Details | I do not know? | |

Nasty girl

   There you go again doing things that you are not suppose to be in and then you look at 
me like oh i'm so sweet if you only knew I can be a freak without showing it. Here they 
go listening to the rumors but i'm your friend so in the end I know that they are true. 
How could you do that with him and her and they were on the ground you were pretending to 
pick up gum? You need to be safe, making out with strangers girl I aint no saint but god 
what are you doing? I don't want to see you years from now telling me you got aids, I 
worry about you and I feel like your special so I even wrote about you come on look how 
much you mean to me. You like him I get it but how many other guys have you liked in the 
past. He's your only, he's a phony make sure he's not just in it for the prize because 
girl you never know some guys are. It's the truth and you need to listen, I don't mean to 
sound bossy but soon enough your name is going to be posted on all the bathrooms walls. 
Telling things that you haven't even done yet. But you will front about it, Lie again. 
Telling everyone it's happened how do we know what's real or fake. I love your 
personality I wish I could steal it, Your loud, and flirty, daring and smart girl you got 
too much heart to be showing it to everyone who wants a sip. this is for all the nasty 
girls out there who think I don't know what i'm saying just ask anyone of them who are 
dead now or are on the streets prostitiuting. Don't be afraid to be a freak it's healthy 
but sometimes it's better when it's secret closet freaks have more fun.

Details | Rhyme | |


           JESTER   *''(] :-)

The best days come round and round
Follow the around the world
A Jester you are the crown
A Jester among the crowd
Searching for life from pole to pole!
A professional when it comes to clown
You got the soul to let it roll
Your too clever to hold a frown
Your parole has lost your control
A smile is all you know how to expand
You run - you play - you dance
Implanting a moment, so grand
Lifting the spirit with just one glance.
You are like a substance in high demand
You are the Queen to a blind romance
You stole the heart of a Nobel man
Jester we are at the feet of your command
Parted from the King, who does not understand
The crowd eating from the palm of your hand
No one knows what jokes you got planned
Suited up in  pinkish - purple - green polyester
Everyone bowing to you where you stand
Excitement towards the Queen, who plays the Jester
Jerking the kingdom of her land
Jester you play the role of the best mind molester!! 


Details | Couplet | |

Loony Tunes

<                                        Cascading lakes and streams
                                           The loon stands out it seems

                                           Minnesota's state bird
                                           I know it must sound absurd

                                           Adopted in nineteen sixty one
                                           Wails and yodels heard under the sun

                                          Black and white bearing red eyes
                                          Wingspans five feet can make one cry

                                          Body lengths up to three feet
                                          Yet  clumsy on lands and moss peat

                                          They are high speed flyers
                                          And great underwater divers

                                          They can dive up to ninety feet
                                          In pursuit of fish they want to eat

                                         They are even on our license plates
                                         An critical habitat drawn on metal slates

                                         Twelve thousand of these unique birds
                                         God that has to be a lot of turds

                                        But for now I'll enjoy it's captured views
                                        Of this beautiful loon and it's most colorful hues

Written By Katherine Stella
Entry For Mini - Blog  Beautiful Bird Contest
By Constance ~ A Rambling Poet

Details | Dodoitsu | |

The Brown Tree

All the nuts fell to the ground
The sane ones on branches hang
Long line from many countries
My family tree

Details | Rhyme | |

A Knight of Passion

In days of old, 
ye knights were bold
And Dragons roamed the land
Sir Lancelot, he was a knight
And Fought with Sword in hand
White horse he rode 
With his lance
A shiny  suit of armour
Beware this knight, the story goes
He really is a charmer!
Now one fine day, he saw a lass
And whispered in her ear
A shock he got, when she revealed
I’m lady Guinevere
In love they fell
Before too long
Merlin cast a spell
While hunting out one afternoon
The king, black knight would tell
Black knight ‘s plan
Came alight
When Lancelot was banished
Shed a tear, did Guinevere 
When she learned he’d vanished.
Now this legend 
Hath been told
A morale doth contain
Keep your lance, tucked in your pants
And save yourself the pain!

Details | Haiku | |

It is now

Ain't a word, you said.
but it takes a daring gust 
for things start to be.

Details | Rhyme | |

The anomaly of irony.

Rolling through a bloody mess,
my master died alone no less.
His mercy was indeed a lie,
he said I lived but now will die.

His hand was swift with a mighty stroke,
within a thought my life was broke.
Oh how I lived, and he knew not,
but now I life to rot.

No foot, nor hand could move a limb,
Three days old and no sign of him.
And then he came at my wits end,
With strength alone I cant defend.

He lift me up and broke my jaw,
Just to laugh as I hit the floor.
He took a blade and made a fist,
stabbed his flesh, his vein, his wrist.

Now you're dead and now you're mine,
drink from me and you'll be fine.
I could not stand my masters site,
I killed him quick with my own bite.

Details | Rhyme | |


Mamma Anna made the best Babba' al Rhum,
you should have seen me how it made me slightly drunk;
and jumping and screaming I danced to the beats of a drum...
then grandma joined in and she sang a classical song!

And the sweet cream was on my lips and cheeks, 
the Babba' al Rhum was delicious and I topped it with chocolate;
everybody began shouting, "It came from Paris,
but we Neapolitans reinvented it by improving its shape and taste!"

Mamma Anna made the best Babba' al Rhum, soaking it in that liqueur much longer;
and Papa' always told me to eat more of it...saying with a suppressing laughter,
"It's a man's dessert, after you eat it, you'll be strong!"
Oh, did he really tell me the truth? No, he was wrong!

It's so very sad that they aren't here,
and I am eating pretzels and drink a beer,
the harmony that stirred their passion can't possibly return...
as they danced on the terrace to celebrate the day I was born!

Mamma Anna knew how to make the best Babba' al Rhum,
and I licked the dripping rum with my finger...not my tongue!
She spoke calmly...when she should have gotten mad and picked up a broom;
no, she was never mean and rude, or ever said to me, " Go to your room!"

Details | Limerick | |


Young Shakespeare didst say to his tutor,
"Methinks I wouldst be much astuter,
And per chance, I wouldst say,
Mightest write a screen play,
If some fool wouldst invent the computer."

Details | Acrostic | |


A is for apathy, “You all know you are!”

B is for itching, “Why can’t I have a car?”
U is for the umbilical cord. You never cut from Ma.
N is for neutral, “Why should you take a stand?”

D is for dependent, “Hey, one always needs a hand!”
A is for angry, “Well, why the hell shouldn’t I be?”
N is for nostalgia, ‘cause in the past we’re free.
C is for the ocks ;) who run the whole damn show!.
E is for euthanasia, “When your old just GO!”

And all that spells abundance, in case you could not tell?
Or went to school in Texas and never learned to spell.

Details | Free verse | |

Those Were The Days

                                     Rebuilding America 
                                     My little Jenny and me
                                     Remembering a time
                                     When Laurel And Hardy
                                     Brought such classics to T.V
                                     My Jenny asked mom can you see me
                                     Just cruising home in a big jelopy
                                     With my Feathered Friend Buddy
                                     Perched on my shoulder and you Yelling
                                     Smile Your On Candid Camera
                                     That had to be such a Jungle Fever back then
                                     Think  I liked it better When you used to sing to me
                                                 That  I'm A Big Girl Now 

Just Putzing Around here
with my last 10 poems
But Love to watch 
Old Classic comedies on T.V. with Jenny
And Trying To explain  to her about Cinema

Details | Epitaph | |

Silly thoughts

Details | Epulaeryu | |

Merry Queen of Squash

Pumpkin, merry queen of squash,
regnant on accord.
With a smooth and ribb-ed rind
clad in pepo-orange,
two strikes to sever
from the vine.

*Mary, Queen of Scots was beheaded by order of her cousin Queen Elizabeth of England in
1587.  Detailed accounts record it took two strikes of the axe to sever her head completely.  

**A pumpkin is truly the sovereign of gourd squashes. .  Ironically, the word 'gourd' is also a slang
term for 'head' giving this poem a most appropriate ending whichever way you look at it!.

***The word ribb-ed in the third line is read as two syllables.

Details | Clerihew | |


A czarina whose needs couldn’t wait.
Rumored to have a private stable,
with horses….if her Cossacks weren’t able.

For the clerihew 2 contest

Details | Clerihew | |

Benjamin Franklin

Benjamin Franklin was known for many a-things
Longing for reality to spring from his dreams
On a wild stormy night made a discovery
A dastardly magic called electricity!

However I would bet highly you didn't know
Of Benji's hauntingly beautiful crystal show
Victorian lasses died and went to heaven
The glass armonica swooned even his brethren

Benjamin Franklin was certainly a legend
To live without his gifts is hard to imagine
I see him now and then if I'm super lucky
His noble face glued to artificial money

Details | ABC | |

My Father's cleats

 It’s funny how my father’s hobby became mine. He has been a sportsman all his life, he played basketball, volleyball and softball all his youth, but his real passion is soccer and even though he is 55 years old now, he still keeps playing it and loving it. He has had all kinds of cleats, all brands, all colors, different styles, but it does not change anything, he still plays amazing. But one thing I do find hilarious is that every time he comes from a game, he cleans his cleats, he washes them and takes them with such an unbelievable affection, that I’m beginning to think that he might love them more than he loves me, but now I do know the feeling of a new shiny, hard and beautiful pair of cleats. I still recall when he took me for my very first pair, I could not believe he was doing it for me, I was so excited, but now I realize that what I was excited about is that I could be like my father for just a moment when I had them on. Ever since I was little, I remember my daddy playing soccer, leaving home all dressed up, ready to fight, and win the ball to make a remarkable roll on the field. The playing field that we both love, the field all covered in grass, all green, so delicious and soft, so colorful… being crashed by everyone’s cleats and the rolling ball, feeling the sunlight on our skin, and the wind on our faces. Having a team, an extra family with whom we could find support and create new ideas, new plays so we could smash the opponent. So yes, I loved watching him play and cheering him up more than I could ever like watching official and famous soccer teams. I do find funny the fact that my father’s hobby became mine since everyone says we’re too similar, and even though he also has a son, his daughter is with whom he shares that connection. I love the fact that our simple relationship was started thanks to such a manly sport, and curiously, to transform me into such a girly girl.

Details | Clerihew | |

Buffalo Bill

Buffalo Bill Stood in the rain and caught a chill Was very ill and in some pain He moaned and groaned…"This is a calamity, Jane!!"

Details | Clerihew | |

Top of the world -CLERIHEW

**The QUEEN is in the HOUSE**

Queen Elizabeth II
A super hero coin legend,
I wonder who's kissing a$$ during an open Parliament.
London should have a law called "THE PAPARAZZI PUNISHMENT." 


The inspirational force vigilante,
Ignited some wisdom in today's philosophy.
He should have won a hunger trophy. 

**RONALD REAGAN meets RONALD McDonald's** 

Ronald Reagan,
White House celebration,
A man of bravery and stronghold, 
I wonder if heaven has a McDonald?


Bill Clinton,
Made presidency lots of fun,
Why did Monica ruin it for him?
Did Hillary, really forgive him?


All she had to say was abracadabra,
Do you think we would reinvent her story?
If Viagra was invented back in history?


more to come...

Details | Clerihew | |

Flag Maker Betsy Ross

It is said the first flag maker was Ms. Betsy Ross
Was also said she could do well with some dental floss
As one can imagine twas because she ran out of thread
She forgot to order it because she didn't take her meds

Battle Of The Clerihew---Contest Of P.D.
Written By: Carol Brown
6th Place Winner

Details | Burlesque | |

Adam & Eve Inventory Accountants

Adam was an 
acceptable accountant
And Eve a bubblingly 
bright bookkeeper;
Adam loved the 
First-In, First-Out
Accounting (FIFO) system, 
While Eve preferred 
The Last-In, First-Out
Inventory (LIFO) system;  
Together they testified that
Inventoried sweet fruit 
should neither 
Sits and spoil 
nor go to the 
Garden wastebasket 

Details | Epigram | |

Big Little Oxymoronic Foot

Bigfoot had a bubbling baby brother—
They labeled him "lively little foot!"

Details | Rhyme royal | |


Always find things to laugh about,
Laughing makes us stress free,
Nice things are not always, the first that we see,
So lots of time,we tap into great memories,
Remember when you fell from your bike or a tree,
Got bit by a bee or bullied by Tommy,
Running to the house,screaming daddy or mommy,
Sorry my child,a comforting hug,
Soothing the pain,with parents love,
They ruffled your hair a pat on the back,
Got it dressed and then a snack,
Now smile or laugh at the thought,
How sad things of the past,now makes us laugh.....

Details | Free verse | |

Ridiculous Me

Watch this scene with both eyes and try not to blink C: --> 

I stood there... silently
Like a predator near prey 
I sneak behind YOU

You weren't even aware of it!! Ha-ha! 

I made YOU jump hIgH
Like a startled hare
I chuckle and smile

You know that mischievous smile of mine? 

Your reaction was
PRICELESS - you were so upset
But YOU forgave me

Well...I'm flattered. . . 

We laugh'd together (just like the good times)
In a chorus - our volume
Picked up extreme sound

Believe me - I could hear our laughter from a mile away!

But I'm glad I did
My best to make you giggle

Ridiculous me... 
Wouldn't you agree?

Details | Clerihew | |

Julius Caesar

Julius Caesar,
Had a few seizures.
Great leader of the Roman Empire,
On the Ides of March he expired.


Details | Narrative | |


Literature was pursued
by the greatest individuals who ever lived,
and they left us works of unsurpassable wisdom;
human emotions have always been the same, 
and this can't attest to the fact that they will not change anytime soon,
but the freer we are, the further we go up in our balloon.

The richest heritage of Humankind
is found in the written word, which is heard often and not really understood;
where would we be today without the plays and sonnets of Shakespeare that were quite sad,  
or Dante's famous canto, not excluding superb works by modern writers?...
During the dark ages, monks translated books from Greek and Latin into common languages;
as the barbarians destroyed everything found in their path, civilization did not end.

Tragedies of famous people attracted the lucrative minds of poets who had heard of them,
thus embellishing them with their vivid imagination and present actual facts...I follow in
their poetic footsteps, writing down stories that have recently happened, or occurred
before I was born; and with ideas as interesting as theirs, I continue in that tradition
without envying their unaging expressions and distinguished style, but by aggrandizing them.

Literature has finally found its merited place in History, unlikely a hundred years ago,
more people are voraciously reading, and keeping the writers busy by admiring
their sensational works, making comments of encouragement to boost up their optimism;
and to theaters they go and spent an entire night to listen to drama and scoff,
laugh, or cry when emotions intensify by the sconces of the electric lights; and cheering,
they applaud the richest heritage of Humankind on stage, and are captivated by its scenario.

Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci

Details | Lyric | |

Country Boy, City Slicker On CD

Well, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
Loaded my truck, found a place, and here I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand,

And I've been learnin' how to use a computor,
How to do some picture takin' with a cell phone,
How to get insurance for my truck and motor scooter,
But city life is nothing like back home,

Because where I come from, they call it the boonies,
Dirt roads, back woods, life as country as can be,
Though now I'm mixed in with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I can still plant me a nice little garden,
Though not nearly as big as it use to be,
And still listen to country music, Dolly Parton,
She's on my coffee mug for all to see,

And I still get to do some dear huntin'
For those split tails runnin' 'round here,
And I make sure to keep my truck tuned and runnin'
By way of Auto Zone, or I'd run out of beer,

Yea, I livin' in the hood, straight from the boonies,
It's great be an American and free,
Though I'm mixed in good with all the town loonies,
They'll never take the country out of me,

Yea, I moved into town to live like a city slicker,
And I'm doin' the best that I can...
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm just a country boy with a city slicker plan,
I can drive by Churchill Downs and hear the horses nicker,
I'm still a country boy, yea, that's who I am,
Though a country boy has a head a bit thicker,
City life is not so hard to understand.

Details | Couplet | |

The Technology Elf

Our first computer was set and ready to go.
How to use it only the children did know.
“Wheel of Fortune” became our regular game.
We would gather to play; it earned family fame.

Taking turns guessing letters: R-S-T-L-N-E.
Every one was a clue to the phrase mystery.
Each night was the same for the kids and myself.
Until we were visited by the "Technology Elf!"

We had guessed many letters without success.
Then, just as our thinking began to regress,
The answering machine conveyed the next letter.
Wide-eyed and doubting, we had nothing better.

So we typed in the letter; oh, my, the surprise,
The solution was clear; our eyebrows did rise.
With hair on my neck standing straight and tall,
The children asked me to explain it all.

We all heard the clue whispered from the phone.
It must have been technology gnome!
Or was it a ghost that caused this mystery?
You can bet that our game soon became history.

But that was back then, before systems improved.
Now we all are addicted as technology behooved.
There are so many fun games and friends on the web.
No ghost, gnome or elf could make surfing ebb.

© July 22, 2011
Dane Smith-Johnsen

Written for Poetry Soup Member Contest: Talkin' Technology 	
Sponsored by: Natalie Fllikkema

Details | Rhyme | |


I will wait for the phone to ring
       No dial tone!
Did I not pay my phone?
I forgot I myself don't like using the

 A very unusual way to leave the world.
       Let's all thank,
For one of the worlds best inventions
The most valuable means of communication.
      UN-great-full we are,
Abandoning the telephone in every nation
We now consider the cell phone a better creation.
What happens to talking to our friends from home.
Now you are talking while pumping gas at the gas station.
Driving around while talking on the phone.
You don't care about your situation.
Just as long your antenna is not on roaming.
What happen to s.o.s. Communication.
Now we TEX with addiction.
Do not forget about phoning internet.
Do not forget about the year1876.


Details | ABC | |

The Vent

im livin in a world, where all eyes on me.
trying to curve my own route.
but route 66 keeps finding its way to me.
ive been plenty sick, in all the events layed before me.
even when i reflect to my lowest points
i dont regret any of the choices
That I’ve deployed in my era
A lot of it by error, but hey
We live in hell conditions and there ain’t no air condition 
Or any guidelines when life throws you in the sidelines
But when hindsight twenty twenty hits
You’ll begin to understand life’s a bunch of equations and you in the mix of it
An you’ll have to think twice, before running into a situation and becoming the best of it
it’s what got me here, it’s what got us here
Ran with my thoughts blazing up to her place and
Guess what happened next
She opened up heaven’s gate
And just before late I slipped out
Simply put 
I’m a Grown ass man
Doin his thing, waitin to blow up like an old land mine
In doin what he drools over
But time after time 
Something decides to creep up and cover the light
Lost my way
Then I revoked to ever know, I ever thought that way
But in the in between time, that in the mean time 
Spent a lot of time
Gettin pissed off just to medicate and lift off
Don’t need Don Perion to sip off
Already had my way with the bottle
Even thought to get back with the trouble and rejoin the hustle
That’s just what happens to a man who really knows his old ways
Whos tired of making ends meet and ponders getting back to the streets.
Memory sets in and he remembers an O.G. saying
No matter how tall your pockets stand when you ball
Eventually times gonna make you fall
And I as I pull myself together 
I don’t wanna end up like the twin towers rubble
I mean no offence to nine eleven but at that time I probably could have used a reverend
But all that’s irrelevant now
because i live with a different perspective now

there you go you made it to the end :-) comment if you like, constructive criticism wanted as well.

Details | Monoku | |


One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.

Details | Double Dactyl | |

My Wife Came Up With This

Piggable - Jiggable
Ivan the Terrible
Strangely proposed to 
Elizabeth One.
Russian society,
Made her refuse him
And spoil his fun.

Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Details | Lyric | |

If History Was Food Part 2

If history was food part 2

Details | Limerick | |

February Funny Bone

                                 Once came along a groundhog named Phil
                                 Looked for shadow in winters chill
                                         Even top hat and coat
                                         Didn't stop whining's gloat
                                Stuck six more weeks paying heating bill                                 

Written by 
Katherine Stella 2/4/12
Entry For
Linda Marie's
February Funny Bone Contest

Details | Limerick | |

Prep Talk

<                                      Peter ~ Piper ~ picked ~ pickled .... peppers
                                        Ate ~ one ~ turned ~ into ~ hot ~ salsa ... stepper
                                                Cherry ~ Banana ~ ....  Bell 
                                         Boy - his - tongue - throat - did ... swell
                                         Couldn't ~ even ~ yell ~ at ~ packs ... prepper

Entry For
Destroyer {Poet's }
Pickles & Tickles Contest
G.L. All

Details | Tanka | |

My Boo

<                          halloween haunting's
                       black shoe polish foundation
                             ruby red lipstick
                       pillow stuffed under big dress
                        red white bandana for hair

                               spatula in hand 
                       eggbeater in dress pocket
                              pillowcase for loot
                       daddy's boots causing blisters 
                          aunt jemima memories 

Entry For
Paula Sweanson's
Halloween Of Tears Past

Tribute To Childhood Memories

Details | Limerick | |



Twin babies lifted very high
Beauties would draw many a sight
What if they sagged way down
Not good sight around town
Without lift they've gone awry

Contest: Limericks Hilarious
Sponsor: John Freeman
Click on: " About This Poem"
Gives explanation...

Details | Rhyme | |

The Tasmanian devil

The New Ocean House, back in sixty-eight,
Worked as a busboy, left that night late.
A very dark night, dark of the moon.
Might have been May, may have been June.

I climbed on my bike, started its thunder.
Sped off wildly, like I was boy wonder.
I flew through the streets, heading to Lynn.
Nice that night, nice night for a spin.

Spun down the streets like the Tasmanian devil.
Not much of an IQ or intelligence level.
I stopped to talk with my frazzled friends.
Said I'd be back before the night ends.

Tore down my street in a roaring rally.
Killed the engine to coast through the alley,
Respect for the neighbors, their peace and quiet.
What happens next is kind of a riot.

Locked up my bike, locked up the door.
Left my white jacket on the tar floor.
I turned to see the blue lights flashing.
Did not think twice, just found myself dashing.

Jumped a fence and ran down the street.
I heard the sounds of their running feet.
They couldn't see the three barrels of trash,
Ran into them with a funny loud crash.

Got to the corner, my friends still there,
Listening to their laughter filling the night air.
The cops pulled up and asked us who.
We told them it wasn't someone we knew.

They left.

Details | Carpe Diem | |


If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.

Details | Clerihew | |

A Whole Lot Of Shaking


                                            Elvis Aaron Presley
                                                  So different from John Wesley
                                                  When he got on stage
                                            A whole lot of shaking earned his wage



Details | Rhyme | |

A Halloween Scene: The Morning After

I hope you slept well. I hope you slept tight
I hope the creepy crawlies didn't come in the night
Did you open your eyes? Did you take in the sight
Of a hovering figure, pale and white?

Did you feel the cold breath? Did you feel the sharp bite?
Did the moaning and screaming give you a fright?
Did you show all your fear? Did you hide in the light?
As your wide eyes and shivering make them excite.

Did you hear from outdoors, victims’ helpless calls?
Did you hear your name echo outside in the halls?
Did you feel the cold slime 'drip - drip' on your head?
Did you notice the finger tips crawl round your bed?

Were there hand prints and puddles the colour of red?
Were there blood trails of foot prints from the undead?
If you woke up and saw none of what I just said
I'm sure they'll return to your dreams instead

That night may be over but there'll be many more
The undead do not rest; it's what they live for
They thrive on the hunt with a dribbling jaw
So keep your ears open for that creak of your door

Watch for the long fingers that be unforeseen
That creep round the corner, all scaly and green
I'm just happy I lived to tell the tales I've seen
I just hope you all had a Happy Halloween.

Details | Quatrain | |

The Earl of Sandwich

Please, sir, some meat and bread
I've not had a morsel for a week
It would stop this terrible hunger
My prospects now are terribly bleak

It's said the Earl is tender hearted
And oh so bloody awful rich
If I could have a taste of his
I'd call the thing a Sandwich

I hate to just come a beggin'
But I'm so hungry I am seeing red
Won't you ask the Earl again
Please, sir, some meat and bread.......

For Joe's Sandwich

Details | Rhyme | |

What Might Have Been Grand by Wee Luck Mc Gee

Well, Finn and Mc Gee 
Were riding along
Headed back home
When something looked wrong

So, Finn off his horse
Now looked all around
He said, "We are lost
But, there's something we've found"

"Look at this massive 
Whole in this plain
We'll never get home
This is insane"

"A canyon like this
What an unlucky find
We can't ride around it
We haven't the time"

"And we can't ride down through it
There isn't a way
If even there was
We'd be dead in a day"

So Mc Gee very calmly
with shovel in hand
Said "Well, we'd better get crackin'
And fill it with sand"

Details | Verse | |

Did Rabbie Say it at an' Efter Denner Speech?

Hawk-teuchin   -   spitting up phlegm
Nimmer            -   dinner
Gundie-guts     -   fat slobs
Mickle-moud   -   great big mouth
Sachleasly        -   Innocently
Muckle herts    -   big hearts

Rabbie wis hawk-teuchin frae the back o’ his sare throat,
Afore he gave his efter nimmer speech.
He said tae the landed gentry, “ye’re a set o’ gundie-guts,
But far be it frae me tae staund up here an’ preach.

Ye ken ah’ve stacks o’ gumption fur ye widna asked me by
Tae render words o’ prose frae ma mickle-moud:
Sae sachleasly ah’ll spout ma rhyming ware fur ye,
It’ll mak yer muckle herts feel staunch an’ proud.”

Details | Rhyme | |

Worthless or Priceless?

It was the best cherry-cola that I ever had. 
It’s the aftertaste now that’s incredibly bad. 
It was 1953, at the corner Five and Dime. 
I still think it might have been some sort of crime.

I had saved enough money from mowing some yards, 
to buy one more pack of Topps Baseball Cards. 
As I peeled back the wrapper, anticipation grew, 
hoping to find an all-star, maybe two.

But, treasure doesn’t always appear like one thinks. 
“Nothing” I yelled out, “This totally stinks.” 
Some rookie named Mantle was all that I found. 
“Fat chance of him ever sticking around.”

My buddy there with me was a big Yankees fan, 
a sucker, I thought, for my ingenious plan. 
With considerable effort, I convinced him to swap, 
my “worthless” card for his “priceless” pop.

The bottle’s still worth a nickel at the store,
The “Mick”? I’d guess, just a little bit more.
It sits on my shelf, like a trophy I earned,
A reminder to me of a lesson once learned.

Note: The 1952 Rookie Mickey Mantle card has been 
valued at over $50,000 by some price guides. – Wow! 
I have lots of old baseball cards I collected as a kid, but 
not this one. I wrote this as I watched an old-timer tell 
a shop-owner about one that “got-away.”

Details | Rhyme | |

You Little Stinker Devil's Echo

In forest you'll hear squak squak squak
May capture bears play
Or foxes cock-eyed walk walk walk
Down by waters bay

High in trees you'll hear owls owls owls
Just more feathered friends
But I love water fowls fowls fowls
So let's not this end

Miss Hood cried big bad wolf wolf wolf
I just stared and laughed
Seeing deer prints from hoofs hoofs hoofs
Think she's needs skunks bath

As many stanzas as you like.The last 3 words of each 8 syllable line are the same, to create the echo. These can be 1 or 2 syllable words, so long as the line is 8 syllables long. Syllable Count...... etc.
Rhyming Sequence.......a.b.a.b. c.d.c.d. e.f.e.f. etc.

Details | Rhyme | |

Lions will be lions

Humiliation occurs
When pigs and monkeys roars
How a pig became a lion?
How , How a monkey roars?
That's when you stop saying NO
Humiliation occurs
When the lions are here
When the lions onshore
Pigs will be pigs
A monkey will stand for
A monkey , no less , no more

Details | Clerihew | |

Minnie Pearl

Minnie Pearl
A real country girl.
Famous for wearing hats,
With the price tag still attached.

Details | Free verse | |

Have You Ever Read

Dedicated to an author by the name of William Golding... Enjoy!!!

~Two boys meet on an island
~~One is skin 'n bones
~~~The other one is chubby

They discover a lagoon~
Ralph teases him by calling~~
him "Piggy" -  how mean!!~~~

Piggy asks him if
There are other people on 
The island with 'em

He has no clue
But this'll answer Piggy's question --
Other boys appear - 
All diverse shapes and sizes
What'll happen next??

You'll see...

Have you ever read The Lord of the Flies?
I recommend it if yah haven't read it yet - I must admit
It's a book full of adult words and it's simply...FASCINATING! - no lies
You should read it - or you'll regret it!

Details | Cinquain | |

Na Na Na Na Na Na Batman { Cinquain }

                                              Cape crusader
                                         Batcave Batmobile Pole
                                  Zapping Banging Powing Action

Happy Halloween All
Boooooooo       LOL

         Tribute To
Batman And  Robin
  Adam West  Burt Ward

Details | Pantoum | |

Penny Thoughts

A penny for your thoughts my mother used to say
I wondered if she thought my thoughts just worth penny
Conversations at our house were mostly one-way
She would say children are seen not heard, times_many

I wondered if she thought my thoughts just worth penny
She didn't encourage me  to speak anyway
She would say children are seen not heard, times_ many
Those thoughts just bounced around in my head everyday

She didn't encourage me to speak anyway
I asked many questions as high priced attorney
Those thoughts just bounced around in my head everyday
Because I was not free to speak mind went on journey

I asked many questions as high priced attorney
Conversations at our house were mostly one-way
Those thoughts just bounced around in my head everyday
A penny for your thoughts my mother used to say

Sponsor: Cyndi MacMillan
Contest: Rhonda & Cyndi's Penny Pantoums

Details | Limerick | |

Pay Up

<                    hes my banker and my heads horseman
                      calling bounty on anothers land
                      hark the herald angels
                      I think this game is swell
                      now thimble owes me sixty five grand

Written by Katherine Stella

Entry For Judy Konos's
Monopoly The Game Of Life Contest
G.L. All

Details | Rhyme | |

A Halloween Scene

Close your windows; draw the blinds as day turns into night
Shut your door and wrap up warm with a bedside table light

Close your eyes and try to sleep but also stay aware
As what may happen in the night could seem like a nightmare

You'll start to hear the sounds of souls, moaning cries and screams
You sneak a peek around yourself but nothing is as it seems

From the ceiling drip by drip and down the walls it flows
Pools of blood soaked in the rug to ooze between your toes

Ghastly ghouls and grimacing ghosts trapped within their doom
Creep and crawl under your bed and float around your room

They'll slide over your covers and slither in-between
As they wriggle to whisper in your ear...

Have a happy Hallowe'en!!!

Details | Rhyme | |


The Normans came and conquered
They landed in the night
I think we could have beaten them
Till Harold lost his sight!

The Normans came and conquered
Their country wanted more
They gave us all a thrashing
And left us feeling sore!

The Normans came and conquered
We Saxons ran to Wales
In the hills we stayed and hid
Until they set their sails!

The Normans came and conquered
Just like the Romans did before
But in good time we grew quite bold
And showed them all the door!

Details | Limerick | |

Taxing Dilemma

Rich ones get richer from our wages.
Middle man paid with too many pages.
We continue on path.
Hiding outrageous wrath,
Revolved in political stages,

Taxes, taxes, what will be the due.
Deductions, exemptions for a few,
All my money they have kept.
Deducting tears I wept.
Tax man arrived claimed all of them too.

The poor keeps getting poorer each year.
They cannot wait for rebate, they cheer.
Sell off, early rebate.
Federal and the state,
Money now, money, for wine and beer,

Written for

Sponsor Carolyn Devonshire 
Contest Name Taxing Times 

Details | Clerihew | |

William Howard Taft

William Howard Taft To big to fit on the raft. So the sent for the barge Seriously, he was extremely large!

Details | Couplet | |

Presidential Trivia

President's Day is approaching so I thought I would further your education,
By revealing useless trivia about some of the dudes who've served our nation.

President Washington actually had to borrow money to get to his inauguration.
He wore size 13 shoes and seldom took a bath much to Martha's indignation!

Abe Lincoln agreed his wasn't the prettiest face when all was said and done!
Once called 'two-faced' he said, "If I had two faces, do you think I'd wear this one?"

James Buchanan was nearsighted in one eye and farsighted in the other,
Causing him to lean his head to the left and close one eye, which was a bother!

For his breakfast, Ulysses Grant loved cucumbers soaked in vinegar to eat!
He probably saved his hide since he declined to join Abe in his theater suite!

Woodrow Wilson was plagued with indigestion and was blind in one eye.
He had a pet sheep named Old Ike that chewed tobacco and that ain't no lie!

Cal Coolidge used a paucity of words so that many folks thought him dead!
He liked his head rubbed with Vaseline while eating his breakfast in bed!

Harry Truman kept a sign on this desk that read, "The Buck Stops Here!"
Remembered will be his scorching letter to an editor defending Margaret's career!

'Tis well-known that Ronnie Reagan dearly loved Nancy and jelly beans,
And was happiest at his ranch riding a horse and wearing old jeans!

And finally, from Barack Obama we learned that there are fifty-seven states,
And that he makes skillful use of a teleprompter to ensure there are no misstates!

Th-th-thats all folks - more than you ever wanted to know about these chaps!
(There's much more I could reveal but it best be kept under close wraps!)

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Details | Verse | |

How The West Was Won

<                         O ye how the west has gone won
                           now wipe those trails of tears my son
                           dance the ring of fire for fun
                           speak and learn native ways
                           learn not to speak with riffles gun
                           rustle bacon beans  Hey !

Written By Katherine Stella 7/3/11

Entry For Dr Ram's 
Rime Couee's Contest
G.L. All

Details | Free verse | |

marking my friends on poetry soup.- the Lord helped me fight death and won.

i don't want to be just marking

time.  i died on november 20,

2008, during surgery.  i was

on a vent when i awakened 

december 2, sisters'

birthday. what made me llive

i'll never know.  i know there

are things to do on this side

of death.

i have no time for marking time.

i have a stupid bag hanging from

my side now.  i am supposed to

"get comfortable with it".  well

that was a laugh.

that was a laugh until i thought

of the people that had these

things with no hope of ever

getting away from them.

i am so lucky.  14 days i laid

on a vent, then 22 more.

i came home 3 days, 


i had
great pain in my chest...
well this is great i said,

a pulmonary emboli, 15 more

days, three days home.

then back to e.r. blood pressure

too high.  this bought me 

4 more days in e.r.

i am home now and finally 

have spent 19 days home.

i feel every pain and i feel

every time that i feel good

yes, i am never marking

time again.....there is

something about fighting

for your life and your sanity

that straightens things out.

i don't recommend it but

i wish i could let your hearts

know what i know.


Details | Limerick | |

Thus, Fate Avengeth

Henry VIII desireth an heir.
Wife after wife, nary son hath wives bourne.
Thusly, he cut off each head.
Findeth a new wife instead.
His sole son hath been born from an affair.

Details | Light Poetry | |


Good old days,
Our ancestors finished wise,
Furnishing humor still to laugh at, 
Small in number but beautiful and humble,
In small,small communities like birds,
Every person had a name since birth,
But all similar,difficult to come familiar,
Confused in the usage of names,
They picked some nicknames like icing over cake,
To ease the identity signatures in case,
The nicknames kicked fading his name,
It carried reasons fit to all seasons,
Cat,one lazy,
Goat,one engaged in gossips,
Fox,one very canny,
Bull,one useful,
Rat,who steals,
Snake,who is always in anger,
Chicken,one who sells chicks,
Bear,who is in dark complexion,
The village today like a zoo!
Name men's but nicknames animals bear,
The ancestors fallen and turned into dust today,
Their master minds stand tall and still intact!

Details | Free verse | |

funny man on the moon

heres how i see it
and heres how it is
living in this world where half of it is advanced
with indoor plumbing
cell phones
and a huge chunk of the globe is not
part of the world still has a hole in the floor for a toilet
and we say ignorance is bliss
oh funny funny man on the moon
the joke you really meant in the Hollywood basement
of one giant step for man
and one leap for mankind

Have we not clued in yet?
Do we not live blind leading the blind?
Am i the only enlightened who realizes
that we were in space probably 70 years before we made it public to the world 
and Nasa is full of it
oh funny funny funny man on the moon
why is society so gullible to think
that the governments technology hits the mainstream market
before they use it for years and perfect it and work out all the bugs
and then hands us something that just looks faulty
and we fall for it hook line and sinker

give me a moment
funny funny funny us
half the world buries their waste
and we flush it away
half the world has technology and half of it is in the stone age
and yet we seem to think
that whoever invents these things has no ties
or affiliation to putting us under their thumb
i mean come on do the math
they landed on the moon
how they tell you they send sattelites into space is a truth within alie
they made up 50 years ago
and were falling for it today

let me play
i get it 
society is dumb
I'll write something yesterday
say i wrote it today
no one will know what to believe
I'll even put a cowboy hat on
I'm sure those cowboy western movies
they had just as many cameras and cellphones
but didn't release them in the market

consider yourself a fool
if you don't think they don't have something in their pocket full of tricks they are 
working on right now
they're going to sell to the future
and no one gets the famous joke
the man on the moon told to the mensa geniuses
but a hush fell over the crowd
and I'm sure there was consequences for laughing
and chances are even they were blinded by the bling
life and blind leading the blind
such an easy concept to grasp
and man on the moon
your a funny funny funny man!

Details | Limerick | |

Quit Wasting My Time { Edit }

<                               One by one they'll shall roll on and come
                                 Like soldiers marching to beaten drums
                                 Echoes  are acknowledge
                                 Cast across thy arched bridge
                                 Haste makes waste even for everyone

Inspired By
Carolyn Devonshire's Contest
Follower Or Leader
GL All

Details | Limerick | |

Complaints Transpired

He complained, complained, complained
All he ever did was complain
Then suddenly he got fired
What next then transpired
Was he wished, he could complain again

(Limerick...Sort of...We have all heard that person who complains about their job instead 
of being grateful that they have a paying job that puts food on the table...So the thought 
came to me about this one.)

Details | Quatrain | |

Redeye Gravy

Now sits the redeye gravy in the pan
It certainly is not at all like jam
Mom made it years ago  for her man
Fry some country ham, pour  coffee bam

Never knew why it was called redeye
Then my grandson informed me just why
Men who had been out late had bleareye
Who looked like they had been drip-dry

I always thought that it was because
It had dark red color from drippings
In my home it  got an applause
I thought that it was God's blessings

I learned my husband doesn't like it
My grandson doesn't like redeye gravy
When I make it only make a bit
Always redeye gravy left heavy

Today decided to place on grits
Feed to the cats see if they like it
Now cat is running around won't sit
I guess that caffeine gave them lift

Details | Rhyme | |

My FAVORITE Classic TV Show

My Favorite Classic T.V. Show A classic t.v. show that I thought was fun and silly. Was one I watched as a child: “The Beverly Hillbillies.” There was Jed. Granny. Jethro and Elly May too. You just didn’t know what these folks were going to do! Granny would offer possum pie or some “vittles.” There was no tellin’ what she was fixin’ in her griddle! This family would “dance a jig.” Or even “sing a song. And then they would all gather around “the cement pond.” It didn’t seem to matter what was served on the dinner plate. Ole Jethro would never get full. No matter how much he ate! Elly loved to have her many animals in the home. No matter where she went. She was never alone! This Clampett family brought joy through our t.v. I still watch this show. But just occasionally. This classic show is from a time in the past. But it still brings good memories that will always last! By Jim Pemberton "The Beverly Hillbillies"

Details | Limerick | |


I'm a long-necked Brontoleesaurus
Sometimes called great Apatosaurus
I only eat twigs and leaves
Another large salad, please?
And a steak for my friend, Segisaurus

tall brontosaurus
a museum favorite 
children gather

*Lee is my middle name

By Rhonda Johnson-Saunders, March 17, 2012
For the Dinosaur Quest contest (PD)
Third place

Details | Light Poetry | |

Awe Your Full Of It

<         twenty twelve

                  What The Hell !

                         cosmic conjuction
                               What's it's Function !

                                         ecologic collapse

                                                   Only Perhaps !

                                                             galactic beings

                                                                     I've Been Seeing !

                                                                             think it's all phony
                                                                                      And Full Of Balony  !

Entry For Gareth James's
2012 Contest
G.L. All



Details | Couplet | |


It's a final sale, no exchanges, no refund; grab anything that you like...
all items sell for a dollar or less, even grandfather's four-wheel bike.

Over forty two years I have collected transistor radios, vinyl records, ceramics dolls
and plates with famous faces on them...oh, Debbie from The Wizard of Oz enthralls!

I am making room for new furniture, and must get rid of them...
it's sad to give them away when they offered much excitement! 

In those boxes and crates, you'll find many commodities...
soap bars, bathing towels, curtains shower and perfumes.

Take a look at some funny clothes that I wore in my teens: tight blue jeans,
wool sweaters, cowboy's shirts, boots and hats, trying to look like sexy Elvis!  

Browse and find that item you couldn't it Marylin Monroe's furry shawl? 
If the final sale is not complete by early evening, I will draw a winner to take it all!

Details | Limerick | |

You're Going To Get It Now But Good

<                             once there was an old cat named chessur
                               only listened to alice for sure
                               but sometimes dissappeared 
                               and left behind grins smear
                               so I've gone mad and shaved off hides fur

Entry For Debbie Guzzi's
Go Ask Alice Contest
        G.L. All

Details | Epigram | |

Bon Voyage.

We christen thee Titanic
unsinkable, gigantic.
but lack of options cost her.
First one: a good defroster.

Details | Limerick | |

I Love Lucy

<          once there was a redhead gal name lucy
            now skit comes to mind is real juicy
            job switching with the men
            conveyer belt takes a spin
            chocolate oh how did she loosey

Entry For Shani Fassbender's
Favorite Television Show / Episode Remembered

I Chose I Love Lucy

Written By Katherine Stella 7/1/11

Details | Free verse | |


Hand of power, heart of whimsy, tamer of
mighty rivers. Rivers of initial learning,
nurturer of ancient gardens, gardens in

their fabled beauty hanging yet in utter
freshness in the fecund hearts of poets.
Poet at heart cooped solitary, hostage of

life's fickle fortune. Fortune dreamed
with vanished glories still as green as
tendrils twining. Twining on to memories

heart-held, held while tending patch of
foliage, muttering through graying mustache,
"You're soft muffins, crumbly cookies,

munchies in my white cell circle; circle
stony though surrounds me, I'm still palm tree,
brave, steadfast; that you're not, but bush."

Details | Clerihew | |

Hans Lippershey

I was shocked to learn today that the telescope was invented by Hans Lippershey!

   I always thought Galileo was the inventor, so I was rather dismayed, I must say!

      Though Hans invented it, old Gal perfected it so as to bring into better view,

         The shapely blonde in the apartment across the via for his keen purview!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Details | Lyric | |

A Running Chestnut- Acoustic Phonology

Toyous melody of childhood memories 	                                                          Board in tune becomes a high wire trapeze   						        Two cans and a string acoustic phonology 						               Each part paper comb sings the bucket drum 				                        With whizzing blade of grass in hands with breath hum  			              The paper roll trumpet blows ensemble strums         					    Running along the day grows as children play  				                   Rolling hillside a box becomes a sleigh  							     Tutor love pea shooter from across the way  				                      After a rain paper boat follows the drain    							           Bows arrows cornstalk fiddle finish reframe               					       Hoop and guider dolls cat and mouse homemade plain

Details | Chastushka | |



Byron died at thirty six
Prolific poet’s work was done
Lucky I am still alive
I had no time ‘til fifty one.

Details | Rhyme | |


In the fifties life was simple
black and white you see
Elvis on Ed Sullivan
came across our used TV

Phones from Mother Bell
Rotary dial straight cords	
made way for Princess touch-tones
we now had tele-lords

Sputnik was the next big thing 
man walked on the moon
Neal Armstrong declared one small step
we sensed space travel soon

Then came IBM computers 
much to our distress
seemed we didn’t speak the language
didn’t have access

Enter Microsoft and Apple
much to our delight
We could talk to all our buddies
whether far,day or night

Email, wireless, blue-tooth
our new communications
talking either neighbors 
or to once obscure nations

As I look back and ponder
changes we’ve been through
I sometimes miss approaching a friend
simply saying how are you?

Details | Verse | |

Where the Sweet Meet

Life like from a fish bowl, really!
Way ... encapsulated like above and behind, you know?
All those like gilded dado's of peachy-pink, gnarly puff, sweet aye?
All those awesome totally rad houses of
flannel-gray San Fran's Victorian Ladies, classic!

Life all sweet and wrapped in the ledges and overhangs, really!
Portcullis like totally frail, precious, half formed, clueless babes.
Really, half the town is like crazed!
Full of what-evers and dandy duds like newborns
each Lilliputian pop-up a sweet meat, smoked
stoked and toked inside their saccharin selves.

Life's a gay and grodie array of colorful buggers.
A,gag me with a spoon, side show of hard candy colored covers.
Really, like jujubes shaken from raspberry doors...
So take a chill pill, a coffee toffee, a licorice bit, a vanilla sucker
and get your most excellent self 
with your killer looks and like surprisingly soft center
to sweet Ole San Francisco's scene.

*internal line rhyme [not end rhyme ;)]
** 1980's Cal i forn i a English
Contest: Talk Like That
Sponsor:Craig Cornish
Poet: Debbie Guzzi

Details | Lyric | |

Barry Bright. ( Sung to Another Great Song. Charlie Brown.)

C, C, D, D and a F for you!
Everyone is failing. There's still one A, it's true!
Barry Bright. Barry Bright.
A shining light! He's Barry Bright!
Sitting in the front seat, 295 I.Q.
" I know the answer before the teachers ever do!"

He slips into the first desk,
slide rule in his hand.
Before the teacher asks us,
he's sticking up his hand!

Barry Bright, Barry Bright! 
He's up all night! That Barry Bright!
Sitting in the front seat, 295 I.Q.
" I know the question before the teachers even do!"  

He's writing out equations in the stall.
Quoting all the Shakespeare in the hall.
Answering in Latin when he's called.
Yes, me. YEAH, YOU! That's true.

He's got straight A's and now Harvard in his sights
We all go out while he studies every night.
Barry Bright. Barry Bright. 
A shining light! That Barry Bright.
Sitting in the front seat, 295 I.Q.
" I read the chapters before the teachers ever do!"

Mournful wailing sax solo while an abduction plot is hatched.

Now graduation, and he's got 5 degrees.
" Why is there no one who is as smart as me?!"
Barry Bright.  He's out of sight.
Barry Bright. He's out of sight.
Wrapped in a package, mailed it to cheers.
" Why did they have mail me out to a sultan in Tangiers?"

Suddenly joy filled sax solo as the sock hop starts hopping...

Details | Limerick | |

Washington's 'Turkeys'

We are told that Franklin would have preferred

     The scrumptious turkey as our nations' bird

          Though old Ben's advice was scrapped

               A turkey might have been apt

                    Since Washington's 'turkeys' are so absurd

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Details | Couplet | |



I'd thought I found eternal rest
cold hands folded, still, on my chest
but I hear echoes from the past
the trumpet's sound, fierce bugle blast

Coming alert, I look around
burst out laughing, see the sound
source - back to sleep with merry wave
at geese, goose-stepping on my grave ....

Alan McAlpine Douglas

Details | Clerihew | |

Woman Imperium

Julius Caesar 
Mighty old geezer 
Got his way with every dame    
He saw He conquered He came 

Details | Senryu | |

Disco Ball

Disco Ball
Frenetic feet tap;
Across the room
Shy boys gather,
First dance jitters crawl.

Details | Haiku | |

NFL Golden Child Injured

Finished before start Colts fans leap from Bandwagon Peyton Manning's hurt

Details | Burlesque | |

Body Parts

Need a fender?  A replacement hood?
J.D. Body Parts won't do you any good.
See, here you'll find ankles and feet in aisle 3.
Torsos on aisle end-caps, for all to see.
Heads and genitals in the refrigerated section
in the rear.  This week we have a special sale
if you need an ear.
Legs in the toy aisle, aisle 6, stacked neatly
next to the Legos and the pick up sticks.
If it's merely a scalp for which you do shop,
you can check out the backroom, where we
there chop.  Fingers in the snack aisle, aisle
number five.  And they're so fresh, you'd swear 
they're still live.
If you need some help to find a part, just ask
the manager, he'll fill your cart.
And you'll find he's quite a charmer.
Our store manager, Jefferey Dahmer!

Details | Rhyme | |

Golden Girls Tribute

"Thank you for being a friend", that's how it goes.
Blanche will fly whichever way the wind blows.
"Traveled down the road and back again", is what they sing.
Rose waits for a light bulb, clueless to everything.
"Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidante", goes the next line.
Sophia shares her sarcastic wisdom, making rose trick a mime.
"And if you threw a party, invited everyone you knew", as the song plays.
Here comes Dorothy, intelligent and bossy, so set in her ways.
"you would see, the biggest gift would be from me" It's almost done.
The Golden girls bring so much fun.
"And the card attached would say" as the show portrays,
"Thank you for being a friend".
Sophia, Dorothy, Blanche and Rose,
for eachother, a helping hand to lend.
The show possesses what the song does imply.
The women"s friendship a binding tie.
 A tribute to them as the legend lives,
Their warmth and caring continues to give.

April Wilson-"The Golden Girls"

Details | Limerick | |

Let's Duke It Out

<                   Once came along an man named John Wayne
                     Winchester by his side causes more pain                           
                     Dusty trails ballroom brawls
                     Battlefield's muddy crawls
                     The duke of western inflicting gains

Details | Haiku | |

the ceiling burst

the debt ceiling talk
led to so much tension that 
the room's ceiling burst

Details | ABC | |

Moonshine Mama

In the backwoods of Virginia by a one room country shack
Stood a still that was a brewing that my Mama kept out back.
She kept a shotgun by the backdoor in an old potato sack
and when the travelers came a calling they brought money in a paper sack.

The bell tree was a blowing and you could hear that little ring
for a taste of that clear whiskey and the good times it could bring.

Now in the quietness of the night with a little light from the moon
Came the smoke that was rising from the making of the brew.
Mama had many names she called it and here are just a few...

Corn Liquor, Bush Whiskey, Hillbilly Pop, White Lightning and of course Mountain Dew.

It was warm when you drank it and had a kick like a mule
and if you needed resting you could sit on Mama's stool.

Now the lawmen would come a sneaking and try to find my Mama's brew
but the tin cans that were a hanging would alert her to the news
that someone was a snooping and trying to find her moonshine brew.

But out by Mama's shack was an old hole that she had dug 
to hid her jars of whiskey from the lawman that came a looking for her special brew.

They ain't never found her whiskey...but I still know where it is...   
and at times I sit on Mama's stool by that old bell tree
and have a sip or maybe two.

Details | Couplet | |

The Letter, 1660

These rustling humans, how they jabber!
With their smudged and crinkling ink dabber

I lie here resting while their investing
Their moments in this blabbered pestering

I've seen their pages scribbled in rages
Of inspiration by their sages

I hear the parchment, crisp and crackling,
Depicting marks pronounced in cackling

And wheezes of a breezes sighs
Read in secret by her eyes

Here in this secluded corner
This one was sent by a foreigner

The rounded man, all clad in fur,
Hears some code, it makes him stir

The thinner man sprouts in his chair
Which creeks beneath his squirming dare

The glamour creature, thin and frail,
Seems neutral about the true tale

I hear a fist pound on the table
Shouting that this could be a fable

"What if it's true?",  the other asks
While in fascination he basks

They analyze it for a clue,
This letter, to learn if it's true

The chamber, while closed, is secret, airy
While echo's this secretary

The scribbled riddles held in hand 
Are esteemed to be so grand

I might chew them if I could
For I bask in my puppy-hood

Details | Limerick | |

Slamming Politicians

They slam each other every day.
Tearing them apart in a sly way,
Truth I say, what a lie.
Political games cry.
Give them cement shoes, drop into bay.

Next election, vote for three blind mice,
They would fare better, than roll of dice.
Vote now for mystery.
Go down in history.
For they have no “tales-tails“, truths suffice.

Details | Free verse | |


Foot wear,
The foot where,
The foot what connecting all to this world,
To dress,foot wear,
Addressing care,
The lacing made old fashion,
Replacing buckles,chains and Velcro in machines,
In rainbow colors,
Short builds to shot up,
Size to size foot wise,
A ladies pride,
Sometimes a tool provide,
A history when came in contact with cheeks,
Thrown at some heads in anger,
Get into others foot often,
Bare foot,a symbol of poverty,
Cobblers to make,
Lincoln an exception!

Details | Cowboy | |


our,that we have..
these are our tools..weapons..instruments
and we just want to live..
put into a situation in wich we did not choose our roles..
some of us are the fans and the royalty
they watch people like me do what needs to be done...
people like me..we just want to live
so we use our weapons and do what we have to..
we didnt choose for it to be like this..
we watch the fortunate  crowd the seats of this coliseum called life..
and they watch us jump back and forth through shades of color..
they judge us...
but we just want to live

Details | Grook | |

Tongue -in- cheek

Count it is ever wit as good :(                                                                 -            *           to wet the mind I would : &                                                                                            a grin how be it a small bit :p                                                                          stuck it out so all may see :p          -            waging like the cynic a bit : \			                                                                   turn it upside down a symbol to your relief :(                                                              biting your bit "A witty saying proves witty" :O	                                                          sardonic your face will not crack : I                                                                               as good as pale gold the electric express :')	                                                                     it will not kill you to laugh a wit : D  

Details | Free verse | |

Sacred Passage

God of light conquer my fear from within

An eclipse of the sun has tainted my inner vision
Who are we to have believed yet achieved
Some are even caught in its pickle;
Stranded as two love birds caught in a fickle

Sacred Passage
The uniting of two hearts so far away we will pray
God of heaven take delight on my poetry
Look highly favorable amidst the summoned truth

Like a lost carriage we take our flight away

Far from the lost brevity in exchange of honesty
The silence has etched its memory in our brains
Shattered by the moment of upheaval and then,
Sacred Passage;

We look humbly then often deeper then ever before

In exchange of honesty its just Studio 54?

Details | Free verse | |

Little Red

Full Moon Brimming 
On A Hungry Wolf
Fire still burning 
Words are not enough

Red Riding Hood,
You stopped me where i stood.
The basket you held, looked so good,
I enticed...And you fell... 

In the woods... safe and sound
We could not believe what we had found
Me in denim... and you it lace

We understood, each other so very well
Full moon brimming over with light
Gazing into the eyes of the other

The twin to me, I did see, in You.
Be careful with my heart, my love.

My running shoes are unlaced for now,
So lean back and enjoy the ride.
Embrace all the laughter, our lives allow.


Details | Verse | |

Le Vacance Pretentieuse: Baggage Claim

Drained to my very heart by our slow-paced arrival, 
          I wander through tasteless decor to the metal arches 
                                                Beyond which a future is unfurled.
My bag’s innards are spilled like blood in the Bible
          Before the cold gaze of the armed man who marches;
                                                He holds the key to this new world.

The mechanistic arch stands and takes quasi-sentience 
          Beside passport control, piercing my finely popped 
                                                Eardrums with sonic solemnity.
I am refused by technology but stagger forward hence 
          Into baggage claim where a suitcase pile is propped 
                                                Up like a holiday Tetris calamity.

My suitcase is soul black and with difficulty is found,
          In its lucid eagerness to fasten itself a faux family;
			   Airports are filled with pretences.
Now we are away again, small trolley safe and sound,
          On the road from snow, heat is where I plan to be.
                                                Our intrepid journey commences...

Details | Blank verse | |


Old people and children are to blame for our overpopulation, yet the land where 
I live, is empty everyone has gone to live in a city fleeing poverty hoping to find 
work, now they are worse off than before. A sudden blackout, I sat in darkness
 couldn’t even see my hands. Staggered around till I found a flashlight, lit candles 
I had in the kitchen; back at the time when people rose at first light and went to 
bed early and stories were told by the old by the fireside .Only priests could read 
and we believed in their gospel truths and they held the evil power of knowledge.
 Now cities are lit up like Christmas, no corners are dark and it easier to believe in 
neon light rather than god. We are urbane and laugh in the face of gloom and call 
it Halloween. There was a time when people were old at forty and many children 
died in infancy. Electricity is back, but we mustn’t forget if we do not take care we 
can easily be thrown into to a world of cruelty where only those between the age
of twenty and sixty have the right to eat, and babies are hidden in basements to
avoid detection have their vocal cord cut. The old have facelift in frantic attempt 
to look fifty four, to avoid being gassed, at places called: “Friends of the seniors” 
and “Heavenly Peace.”  And silent children, survivors of our selfish madness, shall
 inherit our world and learn to whistle as new way of communication.  

Details | Rhyme | |


Six wonderful people very bright and young 
shared a cramped apartment...
is that because they couldn't afford the rent,
or they loved to have fun?

What a hilarious circus, if they had teamed up!
They got angry, but still apologized and made up;
they seemed to have many problems,
some more complex than the others.

Rachael was very pretty and cool,
Phoebe was so naive and not too witty,
Lisa was refined and very beautiful,
Joey was a womanizer extremely funny,
Chandler was the sarcastic guy who loved sensual Monica,
and Ross was the nice dude who was embarrassed by Erotica.   

These talented actors have entertained us
for long years fascinating us with their charms;
they were a close family rather than good friends who struggled...
they must have felt deep sadness when the final episode was aired.   

Written by Andrew crisci
for Michael Falotico's contest,
" Ryhme Me An Old TV Show "
Chosen show: Friends

Details | Rhyme | |

Family Tree

Our Family Tree extends from deep roots and long branches.
Some of our kinsmen grow fast Fruit Trees just in case the
Harvest becomes romantic.
Others imitate Olive Trees as they Stand for the Emblem of Peace
And youngsters try to Extinguish Bushfires for some of their
Mistakes can’t cease.
Some of our Willows weep as a Pine Tree in the Land; silent 
Dripping Tears.
The Scornful have become Forsaken like an Emptiness in the Palm 
Of your hand.
A majority of us found shade underneath the Yellow Birch Tree
And when we decided to depart the Peaches reaped a Golden Jubilee.
Our Forefathers have become successful being planted in a good
And solid ground.
So the next time you want to look up my Ancestors just head for
The nearest Forest right here in Town..

Details | Free verse | |

Death and Dying

The night Hunter S. Thompson,
blew his head off,
Toy Box Tomato Girl,
went Gonzo Geisha on me.
Abandoning the old man’s love,
for pure unadulterated orgy,
intoxicating arms and legs,
intertwining lyrical sighs,
with bi young black,
and blond hard bodies,
tango tongues sharing saliva.
I assume the blue black hue, 
of late night television,
as segregate candles,
was less exciting.					

The night Hunter S. Thompson,
shot a hole in his skull,		
Hemingway’s history, 
lay on his boney lap.
The running of the bulls,				
the crash in Castro’s Cuba,
the locking-up of papers,
the string of worldly wives,
aimless running away.
Toy Box Tomato Girl,
knew little of the artist  face.
Being just twenty two,
she had yet to embrace,
life’s joys and tragedies. 
Not quite able to end it all,
and not quite schooled, 
in T.V. light literature,
spontaneously she fled.

Details | ABC | |

Crazy World

Crazy World

It’s funny how
The universities are still in business
Of producing graduates
That speak funny English
And hardly make invention
And the stock market falls
Down street tumbles
That lets people buy
And make profit
Like grandpa used to say,
True intellectualism died
In the year 1929
With the rise in acumen inflation
It was then that
This Federal Reserve of Ignorance
The true villain of this quandary
Traces its genesis
Hope that explains succinct
This universal impotence

Details | Haiku | |


Ya gotta love them.
Huge, wild, extinct, Flintstone's bus....

Rex was his last name.
He disappeared all the same....
Ice age was to blame!!

Triceratops too.
And if he ever said boo...
Would scare even you!!!

*For SKAT's "Dinosaurs" contest

Details | Rhyme | |

Remember Remember

Grab your jacket, scarf and gloves and wrap up nice and warm.
Hope the weather holds its peace and doesn't bring a storm.
Grab your cats and call your dogs and get them all inside.
If you care for the little tykes then this rule you must abide.

Fill your buckets up with water, get them at the ready.
Do not fill them to the brim so you can hold them steady.
Get the first aid kit supplies on stand by just in case.
I've heard the tales of injuries and burns around the face.

Start with something simple, "someone go get me a light".
A sparkler in all our hands, now watch them sparkle bright.
Get the kids all gathered round as older guys prepare.
See the kids all waiting and their eyes wide as they stare.

Hammer up the Catherine Wheel and nail it to the fence.
"Do not ruin the paint work, let us do it" said the gents.
Stick the tubes into the grass and deep into the ground.
Careful not to poke that pile left there by the hound.

Be prepared, all is ready and it's going to get loud.
Parents buying mass displays to make their children proud.
Roman candles, some sky lanterns, whistlers and rockets.
Rebel kids around the streets with bangers in their pockets.

Stand well back and light the fuse and watch the tension grow.
Let's fill the sky with sound and light and put on a great show.
They all erupt and whistle off higher than a kite.
Wheels spin, and bangers blow as the rockets take their flight.

Explosive pops and electric fizzles at an amazing height.
Every colour fills the sky, it's such beautiful sight.
All around the sounds of bangs suddenly all stop.
No wait, there's always one or two to give a random "pop".

Now the sky is clear apart from massive clouds of smoke.
It's worth it for the kids, but all that money, what a joke!
But a smiling kid is priceless, so try not to be tight.
'Remember the 5th of November'...

and have a Happy Guy Fawkes night!!!

Details | Grook | |

I'm A Chump

<                                        emphasis of labor day

                                        symbolic's end of summer

                                        picnics and parades display

                                     American workers get chummier

Details | Couplet | |


How blessed I am that you are in my life
Not a day goes by when I do not think of you
You make everything alright
To you I do not have to prove myself
For you know me
I love you

How blessed I am that you are in my life
How honoured I am to be a part of yours
Memories made and shared
With you the one I love
My friend, my lover, my queen
'Til the end

Details | Rhyme | |

Mona Lisa

~Mona Lisa~ 

That elusive smile 

Has been around for very long. 

That elusive smile 

shows a lady that's fill'd of guile 

Leonardo paint'd her,made her a song 

She keeps her secrets all along 

That elusive smile. 

Dorian Petersen Potter 
aka ladydp2000 

January 7,2010

Details | I do not know? | |

A Sand Box Experiment

Little Jenny was always found to be very prim and proper/
Outside reading her cook book by Betty Crocker/
Lazy Mary Sat on the lazy suzanne,
Butch Malone was their next of kin kissing cousin,
Along with Mary this made up the famed dirty dozen !
That sand box experiment really made us laugh/
Shortly after gym class,

Butch Malone along with the famed Benjamin Bankhead/
Jimmy Foley the local guitar player knew,
The pathway in life that we should choose/
Often he would be found taking a tremendous dump in the boy's urenil !

The path of least resistance sought about from a chosen few,

Often he would appear in shepherds clothing similar to little boy blue !

Playing guitar like he's going out of style !
That sandbox experience was designed to distract all the teacher's ?
We set up stuffed dummies just to look like real people,
Right underneath the bleacher's !

Old man Winter's who worked for Mr. Kazoo knew the score/
Very often he was being seen outside the local liqour store,
Lest I emplore,

The sand box experiment was in full swing on that one particuler day/

Butch Malone thought he was the real king ?
That was until Mrs. Maloney saw him through the window !
Next the time was drawing near/
Then so was that dinner bell,

Mrs. Maloney started talking to all those dummies,

Next thing you know she had tripped over little Johnny !
He was stuffed that was/
Flying three feet high in the air she had fell right on her face !
What a social disgrace !

Yet what had happened to Butch Malone ?
Like a little dog without his bone/
He pee pee'd his pants then cried all the way home !
The next day when Mrs. Maloney got her second wind/

She didn't even know where to begin/

For that little stunt the whole class was suspended for the day,
Yet for the gang including Butch Malone what did they say ?
All in all the sandbox experiment really did make their day !

Details | Free verse | |

Down And Out Haiku Slam

<                                          whispers of the wind .........
                                            speak to enchanted sea .........
                                            bp ........  going down

Details | Concrete | |

NOT MY little JOY


Everyone who knows knows it shouldn’t have gone this way
A friend I’ve had for eons knows this isn’t the way it should be
That such a threat be handed unto me
My ex-wife Peggy will say the same
That such a strengthened opponent would summon my name
Just three quicksilver years out of high school
Thought I was cruel because those guys seemed cool
Only to be confronted and finally tormented by  such a gory ghoul
Without  question my parents would tell you “not my boy
Not my boy who blessed this earth with his birth
And oh how cute at only ten days old he could get up on one knee
Things like this don’t happen to him, my husband or me”

And they would say those exact same words only maybe paraphrased a bit
I feel like yelling loud enough for people for miles around to hear me scream “Holy S**t
This isn’t fair and I can’t bear the thought of such a callous end
After my doing things an honest man could never defend 
Looking back at the people a hurt badly enough for blood to run
And every single act of selfishness I have ever done
So now, as my every dream, plan and prayer fades
Maybe it’s righteously right that I would contact aids
    © 2011.… Phreepoetree


Details | Rhyme | |

keep it in your pants

He was getting old- but he wasn’t cold
He still had that fire burning deep within
And the urge to commit that adulteress sin.

A sub conscious thought to prove that he
Was still the man from many years ago
Because on his face it didn’t show.
When comments are made about
How good he looks for his age
That’s when he’ll climb on stage.

The ego is the downfall of every man
And to prove himself, he’ll take a stand.
How foolish can we men be
And it’s shown throughout history.

Men will always fall under a woman s spell
From that point on, he goes to hell.
Cleopatra queen of the Nile- Sampson and Delilah
Helen of troy-just to name a few
Took down these men, and knew exactly what to do.

When it comes to women “ we are weak”
The sexual fulfillment is what we seek.
Once the sexual desire is satisfied
The man will try to say good-bye.
But he’ll be pulled back into that web of sin
And on the women s face- there is a grin.
It started off when Eve ate the forbidden fruit
And convinced Adam to eat it too.
It has gone on till this present day
What else can I say.
Now these celebrities are in the news
It is not something that they would choose.
Men are building their own web
And when the spider comes “ they are dead”.
Ha-ha- ha-   you’ve got to love it!

Details | Epulaeryu | |

Ice Cream Delight!

National Ice Cream Day    July 15th

Benjamin Franklin was the very one.
In the year of 1771.
While in France dessert did come.

What is this wonderful delight!?
"Ice cream dear sir,
I hope you like."

With quill and ink
And much insight.
He acquired the recipe that night.

And sent it back across the sea.
To share Ice Cram
With you and me!

Details | Free verse | |

redidit the front page of the internet

I put a Halloween mask on my dog.                                                                            She rolled over in her sleep, but just kept on                                                         sleeping when she landed in the windowsill.                                                                    What Battlefield really needs
IamA Robert Beltran, aka Commander Chakotay                                                         from Star Trek: Voyager, and now all yours. AMA!                                                        Cats love lasers                                                                                                  US/Russia relations                                                                                                    Pete Holmes on why he's always laughing.                                                                   The man has a point.                                                                                                  What, in your opinion, is the greatest thing                                                              humanity has ever accomplished?                                                                        Flogging Molly -- If I Ever Leave This World Alive [Irish Folk Punk]                          Through the eye of a needle                                                                                       Gun safety is important                                                                                       Wrecked cruise ship with a tilted Earth ...
* Note - cut-up technique -Random headlines from reddit news 3/5/2014

Details | Light Poetry | |

What A Liar

Eve Rules
  Adam Drools  {Joseph Spence }

My garden
  Beg Your Pardon

Succalant Mango
     Let's Tango

    Man Work Hard

More grapes
   Apples Ate

Bare Essance
   My preference

Why Oh Why
  Did Adam Try

Cause Snaked Lied
   And Humanity Died

Details | Free verse | |

a running chestnut- prosodic ha ha

By any other name what is in a name 															prosody Rosa Dee the sweet voices arise in                       													Consonance assonance resonance Renaissance															you see being reborn by the word frequency 															colorfully resurrected euphoric euphony 																your flowing down along the Dee an Irish sea														  without life the screams of cacophony  															  cantos of Muirghein the queens nightmare            														 winds of change blow upon the wordy mare      															but the word in question rhimes with prosody                       													so you see to alliterate the marrying sounds															 honest dissonance choosing rather to write it down														 nomadiclly poeticlly phonetically as Rosa Dee															 instead harboring to the odic glottis lotus                                                                              within hours hope to see a singing laughing flower

Details | Free verse | |

Green and Blue

Fish swam in blue waves of cotton candy
Carless gulps of salty ocean
Tails whipping through chocolate sea
Sweet as a rice crispy treat
Mindless beauties beneath the land
Squishy scales under quick sand
While dinosaurs chant for reincarnation
Butterflies flutter in several mazes
Carrying souls from eras beneath to
Timeless eras above to retreat

Details | Clerihew | |


                                                Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile
                                                Lived and reigned Egypt style.
                                         Her kingdom wrenched from her grasp,
                                                She took her life with an asp.

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Conquistador's Lament

"The Conquistador's Lament"
 By Rachel Heffington

"Oh, to have a seniorita
Waiting for me in my casa
As the sun of dear Hispania
Speeds me home-a, fast an' fasta'
And to have the seniorita
say 'twas me her heart was for-a...
I would give all of my galleons
For a girl who I adore-a.

But I'm lone and lorn and wasted
In this colony in Flor'da
With not a single lady
Who would dare to cross the borda'.
I have doubloons by the thousands
And jewels by the score-a,
But I'd throw it in the ocean
For one girl who I'd adore-a.

I would tear my silken waistcoat
And rend my lace cravat-a
And burst my diamond buttons
If I thought 'twould help the matta'
But it's useless-truly useless
For the dreary thing is sure-a:
America has pinned me
And there's no one to adore-a!"

Details | Blank verse | |

flying leaf

Flying leaf. 
Tuesday I´ve looked in my kill list, but couldn´t find 
anyone to drone today, yet had time for the betting 
shop and won ten euros on a horse called Abdulla. 
In my trunks only, I went for a scooter drive; country 
lane a woman came out of her dwelling and crossed 
herself, yes I look like  an overcooked vanilla pudding; 
but no need of her to throw pebbles and set her 
poodles on me. Why do I end up in the wrong places? 
Once was waiting for a bus taking me to Garston and 
it was raining; I have forgotten what I was doing there, 
I remember a black woman who gave me a sunshine 
smile and rain stopped. Still Tuesday and I have no 
assassination list ready only memories of a life where 
I was torn from the mother oak, drifting in the wind  

Details | Haiku | |

You Don't Phase Me

dogs come cats go
just like moon waxing
Don't let it phase you

Tribute To Moon Waxing LOL

Also Don't Forget To
Turn Those Clocks Back

Details | Couplet | |

Two Women at a Window, ca.1670

It's another mild day and the sky glows white
The air is still and cool as the midday light

Admirers giggle, perhaps at a young caller
One hunches over, the other stands taller

They don't look wealthy, yet they don't look poor
Perhaps trusted servants, but what can't they ignore?

They've taken jolly notice, as if on a whim
Of a miming youth who should be pruning a limb

Posted at the window the younger one peers
At this croaking lad, flattered by what she hears

Hunching near the potato patch across the way
He waves in a fluster with a few word words to say

He's glances side to side, behind the wall, stepping back
Emerging again from a passageway's crack

Between the tool shed and the gardener's house
He sneaks with the startle and twitch of a mouse

She remains calm, though tickled by his manner
For he might as well wear a bright purple banner

The older woman chuckles in faint squeaks
Hidden by the shutter around which she peeks

The younger one looks quite near seventeen
With floating white sleeves rolled up yet clean

Her girlish neckline, cut wide and low,
Displays to her suitor how well she can sew

Her hair is tucked with a bow on one side
Her grin is reserved with her eyes opened wide

Could her silly boy still have his pruners in hand? 
Is he skilled with the saw and tilling the land?

Two women at a window, quite content
Is this how many of their moments this day are spent?

Details | Free verse | |

Mystery guy part

   Magic is it possible I can feel this feeling when i'm next to you.

 I feel free from problems from all the issues and then I come back and your no where 
to be found. 

    No I yell this was my chance but it was only a dream and I can't stop 

 It felt so real, how did they know I grabbed on to my sheets real hard 
because my dreams are just teasing me.

 Another poem about that past love that you can never forget, it's like a knife being 
stuck straight in my heart I can't feel the pain because the love was never there in the 
first place.

 It hurts so bad and sometimes it doesn't I can almost remember a time when I wasn't 
this stuck to him. 

  It was a time for carelessness and a time for laughs I didn't have this memory yet 
and i'm starting to think i'm going mad.

 Sometimes I feel like deleting this one thing that keeps me focused on you like a kid 
on candy. 

   I feel like I could never move on... it's funny how hearing you name could make me 
feel all over again.

 The worst part about this is that it never got finished and I wanted to hear the rest 
of the song.

    Lonely, A funny word sometimes it's laughable sometimes it's a crying 
tantrum spilled moment.

     A cloud has been hanging over my head for nearly forever dark and thundering 
shooting rain down my noes making me lose breath and lose focus. 

   Calling, shouting, beating, bleeding then the cloud finally lifts and I can't help 
missing it.

   It tortured me and made me feel weak and now that's it's gone I can't 
help screaming for the rain.

   Come back to me I say honestly I was fine getting 
soaked but it's gone and all I can see is blue skies and that lonely remembrance 
that I am alone.

Details | Ballad | |

The charge of the heavy mob

Half price sale, half price sale’
Half price sale today.
Into the town centre on a bus 
Rode those to be plundered.
Forward the crowd as it swayed
“Charge on your card! The cry
Into the town centre to shop
Rode those to be plundered

Shoppers to the right of them
Shoppers to the left of them
Shoppers all in front of them
Brolly and handbag drawn, at bargains 
They wondered.
Storming the shelves they yelled
On to the tills they fell
Into the jaws of debt
Into the hardest sell
Charged those that were plundered

Where are the deals they made?
Oh how they did some trade
All the town wondered 
Would bill’s ever be paid
In the homes of those
That were plundered.

Charlie Milne 2008

Thank you and sorry, Lord Alfred Tennyson (1809-1892), 

A great poet from a time of the greatest poets.

Details | Free verse | |

Torture Within

There is a dividing line between the chasm fault

Some are eager & content to appear righteous yet
They are only fooling themselves through a dance
One in twain marked on its blotted page yet fully intact
Working too hard can give anyone a heart attack

Lines have been drawn in the sand
When will we ever understand?
The visible from the invisible yet now were caught in the middle
Some our eager and content in playin second fiddle?

Clearer heads have prevailed yet

There is still known torture from within my friend
One will take the time out to listen
A sign of grace spread out upon a peyton place
Circumstances all for second glances?

Yet the heart from within will surface again 

Fought back the tears with a smile still to know all the great while
A pen on a paper a stereo to caper
Me & Eric b & a nice cool plate of fish
Sorry to have missed its waiting bliss

In agony we will begin to see
A misfortune to a heightened reality as a key
Soaring ever higher then ever before reaching great heights
Shattered fragments on the pavement floor 

Some are eager & caught in vice
perhaps another chance or a roll of the dice?

Details | Burlesque | |

The Cruise Ship That Just Didn't Quite Make It...

She was an Italian liner,
Whose path crossed
Unfavorably with a 
Norwegian ship
Out at sea....

She went down that day
All aboard were sad
I just hope that Joe's wife
Was not Andrea by name,
Cause it was the Andrea Doria
Whose fate played to her fame.

Details | Free verse | |

monkey meat

meat market
and i'm standing like a
flank steak
everyone has preference to their
i'm tough 
until thoroughly marinated
gaelic garlic
scandanavian scallions
nice broth
and throw
some potatoes at my head
until i speak as
a human 
stewing on a fire
and never limping
through the life process
of food for thought
or horse steaks bought
for too many dollars
the meat market
needs new flesh
for the old to
chew on their fresh 
souls of ginger
to refresh their breath
smiling while defiling
the unaware
because meat lockers are kept
at 28 degrees
with swinging flesh in a U-haul
going to places anew
transportation of regurgitation
to the new ridiculous 

Details | Free verse | |

The Inner Struggle

Some our very eager perplexed swept within

Underneathe the belly of the beast
A needed flower to grow amidst the rise of yeast
Within sullen fragmented dreams & truth
One may even negate that inner truth for a lie?

That inner struggle within/

To remain attached to the vine sublime

We are more then qualified for its great design
To calm the nerves from within
We look to man yet find no hold
We look toward self thus grafted in again onto the rights are sold

We then read books based on logic & get trapped within

For some, 
It's inner struggle is what we all must seek to face
Within loose debris in decayed formation
Yet some its inner struggle is a way of escape?

Proned toward evident inhillation embraced with its surfaced Peyton Place;

The inner struggle from within
Fought back the heavy tears with a smile
Still to know all the great while
A hand to hold a loving kiss embraced

For this is the thought provoking struggle we enivatably all must face?

The inner struggle.

Details | Verse | |

Passed Down With Interest

A precious penny for your thoughts,
for five a good cigar.
Prevailing wisdom up in smoke
to regale the nearest star.

Keep abreast of Smith and friends,
but true friends we disdain.
As eager birds beat frantic wings
in sunrise search for gain.

A moron's gold soon disappears,
no noontime meal is free
Roll every penny and they're yours,
on that we all agree.

Shopworn phrases from the past
still speak to here and now.
It's amazing still how money talks-
that final, sacred cow.

Details | Clerihew | |

Ben Franklin's Turkey

Witty Founding Father Ben Franklin

Gave his contemporaries many a grin.

Although he wanted the turkey to be our national bird,

Fortunately John Adam’s “eagle” had the final word.

*entry for PD's Clerihew 2 contest

Details | Monoku | |

Front Page News



(This was on the front page of our local paper.  I think to myself, "Well do they get her?)

Details | Blank verse | |

love by the river

Love by the River. 

I carried the old fashion gramophone,
she carried the records to the river. 
We sat and I kissed her while listening 
to 1959 records.

Let´s have a dip. Naked we swam in 
the moonlit river that cleanses disgust.
Her armpits had the aroma of clover

Started gramophone again, music back 
then was so trite, lyrics boring and her 
body looked enchanting in moonlight. 

I threw the bloody music machine into 
the river, she did ditto with the records. 
We made love in stillness as trout waked 
I regretted not having  brought a fishing rod. 

Details | Blank verse | |

war , he said

Broremann’s war
Spring, 1945, German troops in his town were walking about not
carrying arms, they spoke to the locals in a friendly manner.
Looking back it was peace before the peace. Near Broremann's home
there was a tall house occupied by old non- commissioned officers,
middle-aged men in their thirties with children, gave the kids
chocolate and sweets (after the war the building was taken over by

British troops arrived, put a canteen in a disused fish factory,
the German troops had surrendered. Broremann got white bread
with spam from the British. The Germans left by train; many
of the town´s people came to wave goodbye, there was no
dislike against the common soldiers, wrath was directed at the
local Gestapo who had betrayed their country by being crueler
than the enemy and by sporting rimless Himmler glasses.

Years later Broremann met a docker in Hamburg who had spent
five war years in his town. They drank together and declared
 it had been a peaceful war.

Details | Free verse | |

The Bill of Rights, Part II

No illegal search and seizure
Says amendment Number Four
Probable cause necessary
Before we break down your door.
The warrant spells out what they search,
Describing things they will seize.
So hide them where you know they won’t
Go to the judge, and say, “Please.”

Number Five’s an uncommon gem
It says we won’t take your life
Without due process of the law,
Or by talking to your wife.
Testimony from yourself, and
Oh, yeah, double jeopardy,
Will never be responsible
For removing liberty.

We will not take your property
For a bridge or a highway.
Not without compensating you
But, please, stay out of the way.
We’ll never pay you what it’s worth,
Nor what the market will bear.
We shall pay you what we think’s right
And so what if it’s not fair?

So now we come to Number Six:
Speedy trial for you and me.
Impartial juries we will have
‘Less the press first runs the story.
We will inform you of the crime
They think you have committed.
And let you confront eyewitness
And a lawyer, not dim witted.

So here we are, now at Seven,
But this one’s kind of dicey.
It’s about the common law,
And the cost of controversy.
The courts have set some precedents
From the beginning to this year
So put this one from your mind, but
Don’t let lawyers know your fear.

Punishment cruel, or excessive
Is listed in Number Eight.
High bails and fines not imposed
Except in a crime of hate.
This allows a sentence of death
When combined with Number Five.
So, while stoning is a no, no.
Injection can take your life.

The rights for you, herein displayed
Shall not be the only item.
Number Nine says it right clear
Other rights are not denied ‘em.
This simply means, to you and me,
We’re somewhat free, to a point.
Beware of our society
For they say no to that joint.

This now brings us to Number Ten
About powers left on the rack.
If it’s not stated by this doc
States, and people, take up the slack.
The constitution delegates
Power to the three branches.
But if they overstep these bounds
Beware election chances.

Details | Free verse | |

The Bill of Rights, Part I

The Bill of Rights was ratified
by citizens in these states,
But, see, now there is a problem
Today, it’s the world we face.
There are ten things Gov. cannot do,
They are spelled out for everyone.
For now, these rights are set in stone.
Let’s review them, one by one.

The right to worship where you dare
is the Number One protection.
Arab, Jew or the Satanist;
Free from undo persecution.
But when their Gods tell them to kill
we will hunt the sinners down.
We’ll even fight in foreign lands
and bomb them into the ground.

It also says to speak your mind!
It was next on Jefferson’s slate.
But, please, don’t utter the wrong words,
No obscenities from your crate.
Burn a flag and we don’t care,
The Supreme Court said one day.
Even fools deserve a voice.
But, in schools, you cannot pray.

Freedom of press is mighty nice
Till Paparazzi track you down.
How does the First Amendment
Let them treat you like a clown?
If the press is wrong, you can sue
But infrequently will you win.
The Courts have said, time and again,
Their mistakes we will pardon.

The right to gather we do have.
Thank the Gods they put this in.
Just make the choice of time and place
And let the world see you win.
Protest someone’s execution,
Say CNN and Fox News,
We will ask you stupid questions
And take shots from different views.

Right to Bare Arms is Number Two
NRA says that’s a FACT now.
Our founding fathers never saw
An SMG shot at a cow.
If they had, I truly think,
They’d be completely horrified.
A change of minds you’d see so fast,
‘less, of course, they’re petrified.

Militia is a good idea.
Let’s secure the federation.
Please don’t shoot the officers
When they come for regulation.
You’ll only see the FBI
If you buy weapons banned,
Or if you brainwash members
To take poison from your hand.

Number Three? No GIs in home:
Not at peace, nor if at war.
Unless the Houses pass a law
Proposed by a senator.
But even with that stupid law
We will ask before we do.
Forefathers said we surely must
Just don’t expect us to pay you.

Details | Blank verse | |


“Moon light and lovers” yes I remember it well,
now I´m grateful for moonlight when going to 
the outdoor loo where rats assemble.

Yesterday, when love was easy, yet she left 
I blamed my after shave…me the lover had
my pick but the one that mattered left.

Everybody love somebody sometimes, I loved
everybody at the same time and found to my 
utter surprise abandoned by everyone.

 Smoke got in her eyes I was only trying to be
sophisticated, I left to hide away, but a man
needs his mate…but I had left it too late.

Love and glory, why didn´t I see that, thought 
glory had to do with war. When she married
 a hero, I saw it all and shot them both.

Hang down you head Tom cowboy hang 
down your and cry they are coming for you 
tomorrow and take your life.

Details | Free verse | |

Somebody Loves Me

Produced 50 yrs ago
My master Pravin Pant Sr.
Felt it was time for my Just Born coop to grow
So he introduced me to some other chicks
Bunnies bats cats pumpkins and
Even thought of placing some lucky stars
In for the heck of it what a day of cellabration
Now he has flipped his lid once again and took a few friends back
Had turned them into lip balms but I don't mind
For they will stay forever fresh on my lips as I speak of them
I been dropped off buildings had been steam rolled over
And each time I bounced back with zest
So please come rescue us from this crazy farmer
Place me in a warm basket or cake or even a dressed table 
For I m just a little peep looking for somebody to love

To The Peep 
In All Of Us    LOL

Details | Couplet | |

Get A Rope

Gun slinger
    Matt Zinger

Dressed in black
     Didn't come back

High Noon
    Was Doomed

Quick Draw

Got A Rope
   Hung that dope

Undertaker Called
    Dead Body Hauled

Poured the whisky
     From Junction 60

Dead Man's Trail
  Where slingers failed

Details | Light Poetry | |

Soul Of A Stripper, Life Of A Housewife

The music thumps, the walls jump
She pole dances against the jamb
Dust rag in her right
Polish in her left hand

House is hers for a few hours
To fulfill a fantasy
Bump and grind it babe
The vacumn whiiiirrrs away

Shake that booty, strut that stuff
Transfer clothes in washer to dryer
Wearing faded blue jeans
Kick that leg up higher

Beds are made, bunnies dusted
She cat walks looking demure
Practises a sultry pout
Wiping spots from the mirror

Work the shoulders, drop to a deep squat
Then stick the tush up in the air
Family is due home very soon
Straighten her clothing with care

Greet the kids with hugs, husband with kisses
Getting  dinner to the table
While news plays in the background
Her life is happy, solid and stable

Dishes washed, kids off to sleep
Taking my husband by the hand
This housewife leads him to our room
Where her stripper soul takes command

Details | Limerick | |

Freedoms Not Allowed

Not allowed to chew gum anymore,
What will be next, not able to open door?
This may seem frivolous.
Will be advantageous,
To profiteer, he will know the score. 

Details | I do not know? | |

Time changes, lorries don't

Here I am to tell you a story
of an old and broken lorry
and it's friend, the old garage,
they were both heroes once.

Back by decades it happened once
that some guy bought a garage.
Believe me was the man surprised,
when he saw a lorry inside.

The lorry wasn't in the deal,
but there it was and it was his.
So the man soon decided,
that with that car he wants to ride with.

He popped the hood, made sure it worked,
turned on the engine and went to work.
He did the same each workday morning,
until one he got a mysterious warning.

It was strange and it was yellow,
it said the garage was being hollowed.
Of course the owner didn't like it,
so he sued the city hall and by god, he won.

The town had evil plans before,
they were going to build a shopping mall.
But since the little garage had stayed,
all nice old building stayed there and smiled.

Overnight the city loved him,
the people smiled and gave them gifts,
it lasted for some weeks
and that was it.

They all forgot the nice old man,
his big blue truck and the sad garage.
Now the city plans a scyscraper
and guess whose garage is again on the papers.

Details | Light Poetry | |

Stick It To Him { Footle } Light Poetry



                                                         Out there

                                                                       Used stake 
                                                                                He's baked

Tribute To Halloween   

Also Entry For 
Donna Golden's   Footle Fright

Details | Free verse | |

Hey Vern

<                                                       Hey Vern !

                                                  This is  Ernest P Worrell

                                                     Coming your way as

                                                         Auntie Nelda
                                                          Doctor Otto
                                                           Sgt. Glory
                                                          Baby Ernest
                                                         Astor Clement
                                              Now doesn't that just bust yer bubble
                                                            Hey Vern !

                                                         Through The Fog

                                                           Read My Lips

Entry For 
Deborah Guzzi's 
Catch Phrase
GL All


Details | Senryu | |

Never Told a Lie

if George Washington
never told a lie, then no
president has lied

Details | Blank verse | |

a message

A Message 
Our old captain was pensioned off, he had been 
the master on the same ship for ten years and at
sixty five he didn´t know where to go as his whole 
life had been the sea. The first officer was taking 
over. He had noticed the old man every morning 
went on the bridge, opened a locked drawer and 
read something from a folded piece of paper. 
The first officer having sewed on an extra ring on 
his uniform, now had four, was curious opened 
the drawer. On the paper was written: starboard 
is right and portside is left.  

Details | Rhyme | |

Where the Devil Hit the Ground

There's a place somewhere
East Jesus to be exact
Did you ever wonder why
They call it that?

It's a fruitless waste
Where trees spontaneously combust
There's a mark on the ground
Where the Devil bit the dust

He left a charcoal scythe
As he skidded along
Crying to the heavens
That he'd done no wrong

After years of tears and moans
He grew angry and bitter
"Injustice" he cried
"We'll see who's the quitter"

So here we are now
Ten millenia later
Heeding the spot
That spawned emos, men, and haters

Details | Sonnet | |

Minnesota Nice

The great upper mid west
Minnesota put to the test
Ten thousand lakes and streams
Reality for many who like to dream

From Itasca state park
To the Louisiaina's wooden bark
The mighty Mississippi flows
Gently down the outcrop she goes

Crime rates are always's on the rise
But really does it come as such a surprise
Everyone seems to like to hug
Except when its a mosquito bug

So many call us Minnesota Nice
But some still say were Cold as Ice

Details | Ballad | |

Let's Talk Shoes

Way back in 490 B.C. in a place called Marathon,                             
the Persians invaded Greece with forks and spoons.                    
The Athenians fought back with courage and bravery,              
warding off the no-good Persians back to the sea.   

A young lad, Phidippides, to announce the great victory   
then sprinted to Athens some fifty kilometers away.                        
There in the city's gate to the people he pronounced                         
“Nike, Nike!”, then promptly fell dead, unannounced.                       

Any joker versed in Greek mythology shall have known                      
that “Nike, Nike!” really means “We won, we won!”                         
But what I can’t quite figure out as I pace the floor                    
is what damn Reebok and Adidas really stand for!                                  

Details | I do not know? | |

Halloween Night

Halloween Night 8/25/12

Night is coming fast,
I really want this night to last,

Ghost, ghouls, muppets, angels,
Little witches practicing their spells,

Graveyards appear off roads,
Cobwebs string along lumpy toads,
Halloween, Halloween,

Fog comes from no where,
Frankenstein and Dracula want your blood,
What, are you scared?
It's Halloween, the dead emerge, runnnnnnnn

Amy Winehouse and Jack Daniels come hand in hand,
The show with Ray Charles with Zombie Winehouse in high demand,
Audience drinks mugs of tropical blood,
Werewolf from Paris flies in to make life undone,
Dario Argento takes notes for cool effects,
He sits away from the demons, of all, he knows them best.

For those stuck at home,
Pass out candy to a few drones,
Tinkerbell blesses you with glitter,
Mary Poppins has to mark this moment on twitter,
Jason would rather just cut your throat,
So be nice, give him the basket, try not to choke,
The Crazy 88s are Halloween neighborhood watch,
Looks like Andre the Giant just kicked one in the crotch,

It's midnight now, the carriage now a pumpkin,
Prince is mad, no kiss tonight, skins a lump again,
Concert was a success,
Candy is gone, no more stress,
Scared to sleep now, the best comes during rest....

Details | Free verse | |

Haiku with Media

Few Words, Few pictures, News
Thousand narrations to same story
Every day a new story
Journalism, an art to write
Whether truth is perceived or false
None care, just write it.
Coverage of war or peace
Hidden remains the agenda of brokers
Cameraman with presenter on TV
What is shown, repeat telecast?
Same images, and same footage again
As seen on cable TV 
Magazine, periodicals, articles and letters
People read and contribute searching truth
Some are victims, others spectators
Morphed I did see, pictures
Some well crafted, some under bad hands
Every agency has a news
Reports, articles, statistics and surveys 
Core contents of the daily news papers 
2 page news, rest advertisements.
New flash, breaking news and updates
Presidential speeches, parliament debates and reality shows
Twenty four seven TV channeled 
Melodies, drums and orchestra played
Dramas, shows, politricks and business
Echoing; let the shows begin.
FT, BBC, CNN, News corp. Siasat
Created, supplied, edited, published, blogged, or uploaded  
Chinese whisper crawl in their veins.


Details | Free verse | |


Roam the noisy and narrow streets of beautiful Napoli on any day,
and over a popular cafe hangs the comical Pulcinella's image; 
many tourists aren't familiar with this guy dressed in white!
Why does he say," The best Baba al Rum is made here! "
The bartender puts on a huge smile when customers walk in.
Controversially, the infuriated French would claim, " We invented it! "
Then Pulcinella would reply with a delirious laughter,
" It was pretty good then, but not as tasty as it is today! "

*Baba al Rum is a Neapolitan dessert

Details | I do not know? | |

"Pee-Pee Lyrics in Valentine"

Making secreted dreams
that beat the sound of excreted water
flowing with each enriched elimination
the kidneys are in movement
the physical process is in timing
moving the waste
and expelling
the urination from the necked Urethra

aka:lyricvixen ha-ha!

Details | Free verse | |

It's A Mad Mad Mad World Out There

I want to know
What happens after
This confrontation

Well  !
Well  !

Dr Jekyll


With potion


Mr Hyde





Mad !
Mad !
Mad !

Mad !

Details | Rhyme | |

Caesar Really Was A Decent Bloke

I once knew a bloke
Who hailed from Stoke
He saw me on the street
And so we did greet
But I said to him with much ire
"You're a liar
You call me your chummy
But you hate me mummy"
To the allegation he did respond:
"You are mistaken, of your mum I am fond"
"Nay" said I
"You just like her black pie."
After much thought
To his lips he brought:
"Caesar really was a decent bloke"

I once new a lad
In dog tooth suits he was clad
As I boarded the tube
I yelled "Hey rube!
You slept with my sister 
Explain mister!"
He consternated
And maybe debated 
But he said:
"Caesar really was a decent bloke"

I once knew a sod
Who seemed quite odd
I was watching the Blues
When I said "Those are my shoes!
Explain saucy knave!"
He replied: "To me your girlfriend gave
After that
Unforgettable spat"
"That's a false report!"
I said in retort
To which he said:
"Genghis really was a decent bloke"

"Don't you mean Caesar"  I said
Reply:  "Forgive me cabbage head
I have no abode with which to rest my node
Be gone with you
I have two 
That'll make you stew
If you don't shut your gob
Don't talk of Caesar my name is Bob!"

One day
On my parlay
Through Southhampton way
I was confronted
By a man with head bunted
To me he said
"I wish you were dead
200 pounds you owe me"
I shrugged at the fee
But did reply
"Caesar really was a decent bloke"

Details | Free verse | |

Sebastopol - Apple Blossom Weekend

The First Methodist Church,
with its bold wooden steeple,
burnt to the ground in 1914,
for preaching prohibition.
The good folks of Sebastopol
weren’t having any of that.
Today the Apple Blossom
Parade marches past
the rebuilt church, past
the Masonic Temple, past
Martha’s Mexican restaurant,
with its soup bowl Margaritas, 
past Old Main Street Tavern,
overflowing with biker patrons,
and Jasper O’ Farrell’s,
past The Powerhouse Brewery,
The Greenhouse, and G.T.O’s,
with its bottomless Bloody Marys.
As the entire town, marching bands 
and all, spill into Ivy’s Park 
for a two day party, pixilated music,
and four dollar beers to support
Analy Union High School.
No wonder Luther Burbank
and Charles Schulz
called Sebastopol their home.
And The First Methodist Church,
now made of stone, 
the only quiet place in town.

Details | Sijo | |

President Bush in Three Lines

Confusion reigns in him, even before the press conference.
Yet when there's a chance to make a bad choice,  none's more decisive.
Acting only when he must, he throws the chips, lets them fall.

Details | Limerick | |


There once was a man who could tell no lie.
Could laugh quietly and deeply cry.
Placed into politics,
Then learning, some new tricks.
Now truth forgot, so much by and by.

Details | Rhyme | |

"Why Are You Smiling?"

Judge Bristol passed his sentence with the following words and said,
"The said William Bonney, alias Kid, alias William Antrim
shall be hanged by the neck until his body be dead, Dead, DEAD!!!"
Billy left the courthouse smiling, almost as if in glee.
"Why are you smiling?" an interviewer asked him inquisitivly.
"What's the point in dwelling on the dreary side of life all the time?" the Kid responded,
"Today the joke is on me."

A true tibute to The Kid's charm, humor and endearing personality.
The above is not legend. It's documented true history.

Details | I do not know? | |


As they leave,
They leave for us 
Calabash full of sorrow and agony
They leave for men a plate of frustration
And desperation.

As they leave
They leave for women nothing
But cups of tears and fears

As they leave
They leave for old ones a basket
Full of fruits of ultimate death and shame

As they leave
They leave for workers a big bowl 
Of empty promises, unpaid salaries
And incessant strike actions

As they leave
They leave for students a stabbed
And crippled students’ union,
Ramshackle and “Renopainted”
Halls of Residence

As they leave
They leave for our generation a loss compass
From which we can find and rediscover our
Moral values, valuable culture 
Instincts of deliberative governance and 
Leadership cum administrative acumen

As it is
We are living with fear of gbu-a-gbu-a 
Of daylight gunshot of the emboldened to 
Extort, encouraged to maim and induced to kill
Ultra-fascists campus cult groups commissioned
To crush all seeming oppositions

As is it
We are living with:-
Biochemists without reagents
Microbiologists without modern microscopes
Linguists without modern language laboratory
Computer students without
Being opportune to hold a mouse
Physiologists without bloodbank.

As it is
We are living with 
Dike archaic books and non books materials
Students and staff  basking in the euphoria
Of stone age and ancient facilities.

As it is
We are living in a garden that detest truth
Genuine intellectualism, dissent views and
Contrary opinions but rather nourishes in
Multi-colour ignorance, white lies, 
Ever green concocted disortions,
Oceanic blu-i-sh sycophancy and reddish intolerance
Which is only reminiscences of the black jackboot
Days of the Abacha junta.

Alayande Stephen. T

Details | I do not know? | |

Drown you with mediocrity

Ten feet tall shadows
Dump cigarettes from their eyes, smoke pouring out their pupils
Spew alcohol from their mouths, dirty teeth cleaned white by whiskey, vodka, and rum
Soiled again by vomit, and the filth they spread
These monsters of beings live on concrete sidewalk squares
They are stitched to couches, and glued to T.V's
Hammers for hands to smash through dreams
Left like glass in the middle of the street
A trap set to cut deep into our heels
With blood left to pool from our dirty feet, to slow our progress
From the shadows
Where the streetlights don't rain light on our corners, their tentacles of ignorance will 
bind your ankles
It will pull you into the dark, into their lives filled with white noise, and static ringing in 
their ears
Into their houses with T.V's in every room, cold and void
it will pull you into the big smiles in pictures, a moment of fake happiness for everyone 
to see.
They will pull you into their little, perfect broken households
And they will drown you with mediocrity.

Details | Blank verse | |

church bells

Church Bells 
Once I lived in a charming English village, near 
an ancient church, every Sunday morning 
on my only day off, the bloody bells chimed.
Thought I saw a woman cycling to mass in 
the mist, and it wasn´t Germaine Greer.  
When Muslims ruled Andalusia, they tolerated
 Christians, but a poet of that time -Ibn Baqi- 
 circa 1059 1112, wished they wouldn´t clang
bells so hard waking him up when air was cool, 
sleep sweet and his Christian mistress had to 
get up and go to mass. So far nothing has 
changed, dear Ibn Baqi, the bells keep on tolling

Details | I do not know? | |

Bad Little Piggies

This little piggy never came through 
I come in for an interview, 
Everything is pleasing,
Without explanation you leave the table.
And start to make a pizza?
I'm leaving you right now..
As I get in my car,
I see you run out to get me,
To late buddy, you went to far.

This little piggy wants hard work from you
I drive downtown for an open interview,
Few hundred wait, 
Hostess attention is flaky,
The order of resumes is shaky
It's no mystery the turnout would be big,
The apology you give is a fib,
People been here two hours,
Those that just arrive,
Get their opportunities faster,
I'm already in negative dollars,
30 min before interview time,
It's announced group interviews will begin,
There's no way I'm coming again,
The manager ignores me as I ask a question,
This disrespect is getting very old fashion
Not worth it, I'm leaving, Before I beat someone I need a mellow distraction,

This little piggy isn't looking to keep me long,
I want this job for good,
But all workers I talk to 
Say if offered a permanent position to take 
They would
Some been here 8 years,
To this day,
Their Temp agency provides them pay
So much for business keeping employees in house,
No wonder so many employees want to bounce,

This little piggy doesn't care if I trust,
You tell me you want to hire me in the interview,
I get no call for a week,
You leave me a message,
Details I'm given are pretty weak,
There's some employment agency I have to call,
Why didn't you tell me this before,
Start dates already been stalled,
I take the initiative to call them and get tested,
High hopes this would be different were vested,
Everything is clear I'm supposed to start soon,
Get a message a week later I need a cert?
I get the cert,
I start the job, 
They've got everyone here working 8 hours a week,
I should be the manager they seek,
Im quickly growing tired
Friday comes along and I'm fired. 
I ask “whats the reason you say?”
“You've requested too many hours each day!”

So unemployment, long story short,
This collector is here to stay

Details | Rhyme | |


There is a little town where once they mined for gold.
now it's just a tourist place, where stories are retold.

Like the one about the miners, who where both on their death bed.
Well, one  he bet the other he'd out live this friend call Fred.

As the clock stuck midnight, poor old Ed he passed away,
And his old miner friend he lived another day.

Now both these two old fellas lay up on old boot hill,
And the story it lives on, and we hear it ever still.

Now as you walk the pathways that the miners use to tread,
You see the lovely forget me knots, And hear the voices of the dead.

You hear them whisper gentle,though the needles of the pine,
as they  walk and talk together about another time.

Yes, they walk and talk together about the days of long ago,
and you wish that you'd been with them, so your story too, could be tole.

Details | Burlesque | |

Made in China

Everything I see
Is made in China,
How could that be?

Mom told me they were starving,
Eat up all my green beans,
So if they're really starving,
How do they have the means?

They make everything I own,
Everything that's for sale,
There's like 600 billion of them,
So how could they possibly fail?

The good old USA,
Makes nothing anymore,
Everything manufactured,
Comes from another shore

We sell bullshoot ideas,
Promises sure to fail,
What the hell is going on?
When did we de-rail?

Maybe we can make more trinkets,
And look for more Indians
and steal their land for a few pennies,
And if they're too smart for that,
We'll slip them a couple of "bennies"

We are the master race,
Or is that no longer true?
Come to think of it, guess not,
Not from the looks of you!

Details | Bio | |



Details | Rhyme | |

Betsy Was a Good Old Sport

Styled like a T Bird.
She really purred in third.
By listening to the engine
you did shift.
Ahe was sleek and styling
if you get my drift.
Her body golden cream,
the roof black.
It's the one with the roof
that slants slightly back.
Pop shifting soon became
my speciality.
I just loved my 
1964 Super Sport Chevy.

Details | Rhyme | |

Get Dressed

If you're too tired too eat the meat
Grow a backbone and stand on your own two feet

Doesnt' happen in a minute
Doesn't happen in an hour
Works like soaking in marinade
Longer it sits, 
More flavor is added to the taste of power

Lips and a voice allow you to speak
Ears allow you to hear
Eyes allow you to see
You'd rather ignore these miraculous gifts
While you relax and drink a beer

You wake the next day
Disappointed that you've settled for a job you hate
Get dressed, drive to work
Life is too short for this..common!
Why do you wait?

No wonder you keep yourself so well groomed
You've got nothing else to offer, you feel doomed
That mentality wont get you down the block
Take a sick day and learn to play with sidewalk chalk

Money isn't the root of all evil
It's greedy people that want to be in histories sequel. 

Details | Lyric | |

I don't know what to call this...

Ok. So for those who don't know I want to go to California.
However I may get there, I don't really care.
Nor do I give a dam. Yes that's what I really meant 'cause what I say and what I dream are
bigger than any amount of water in the world.

Danger in every corner of my life, it must be nice to be sitting in a reclining chair
knowing that you have 50 soldiers at your command.
I'm not talking about Obama 'cause I have complete respect for him. Instead look at Arnold
Schwarzenegger who doesn't have to do a thing.
All he has to do is sit back, relax, enjoy the ride, and not die.

I'm sitting here and talking about the governor of California but look at where he landed.
It's time I took a leap forward and stopped looking at the past.

Details | Epitaph | |

Laurel And Hardy {Epitaph}

                                      American duo great humorists by far
                                      A famous act of our cinema history
                                     Hal Roach's most lucrative comedy stars
                                     Revived on our T.V's in movies or mysteries

 In Loving Memory Of
     Laurel And Hardy

Thanks Again To 
Sir Joseph Spence

Epitaph is a commemorative poem inscribed on a tombstone or mortuary 
monument written in praise of a deceased person.  Generally, epitaphs are 
small poems with rhyming lines written in reflection of the deceased person’s 
life.  They are not always somber and some are very humorous and witty.

Details | I do not know? | |

"Interpretations of....A Rackatackle Shaborous....Part 2"

The intestines of a sow....The heart, of a baboon....Don't worry, we'll take good care, of you!?

Androids and clones....And, we'll freeze your brain, for, tomorrow....

All wisdom, originated, in the west?....This is, 'Our God'....This....This....That....

We're right, your wrong....Kill the plague....Conquer, the desease....

Help them all see?....A feather, shall divide....Their....Your....Fate?

Set a date....Grab a mate....Choose your side....'Rise'....Articulate!


Here, take this pill....but, do call me, in the morning, for, another, breakthrough?

Freud and Young....Einstein....Professor, whats his name?

Modern analysis....Scientific....Astrological....Philosophies....And, Doctor Phil....

Shave a little here....Add, a little there....'There'....There you go

Presto....Pick a card....'How'....How'd they do that?

Its all, in the scope son....Its all....In the eye, of the beholder....

Hit em with a left....Buckle em, with a right....Now, now, now, now, step, to the side!

Here, I just made, these eyes....'Your OK~I'm OK'....Call me, Mr. Jeckyl

No, I'll call you. Mr. Hyde!....

And, ten million years ago, today, man, walked upon the moon....

And wisdom, 'wisdom,' well, you see, it came, from the north?

Here....Meet....R2,D2....And, have you ever seen the bones, the remains

Of...."A Rackatackle Shaborous"....But....Dr. Frankenstein....

Yes John....What, is your question....(Lightning bolts and thunder)....

Well, professor?....If everything originated in the south?....Then, what am I to do?

You see....My eyes....Will close....Soon....Before....I ever....Even...."Breathe!"

And, I really want to know, before I go, the meaning, behind the cause....

Behind the factor? Behind the feather? The planet, the universe, the statue, or, the tree?

'The God,' that shall, or shall not....R2D2....Decide....My....'Eternity!?'

Yes, yes, good question....'Igor'....Could you answer that for him, please....


                                                 {The Ologies 2B}

Details | Haiku | |

Whats Cooking

mojave desert
one hundred and one in shade
can cook egg on rock

Details | Rhyme | |

One famous night (a Quiz)

Ok so I decided, to try another quiz,
And see if you can guess, what the answer is.
It will be an easy one I promise maybe, 
Just follow the clues and look in the belfry.
Look out for the bells, don’t bump your head,
For this I would surely dread.
Ok so we all settled that,
Now look oh look for your hat.
You don’t have a hat, imagine that, 
I wonder who took it, that dirty rat.
So here we go one more time,
I am trying my best to make this rhyme.
You think it easy well not well not
Back to the answer I forgot.
Bats in the belfry two by two,
Lets think of something completely new.
A car you say, could it be,
If that is the answer, you get one free.
Now lets think of something famous,
Could it be someone named Amos. 
No-no, no-no that is too easy,
Oh my tummy is getting queasy. 
And just imagine on that night, 
The way he felt on his flight.
Oh my oh my there’s bugs everywhere,
Cant even imagine sitting in a chair.
Oh look oh look the bugs light up,
Don’t let them in your coffee cup.
Now that must be a clue you gave it away,
You know better than that, that will be the day.
Where do we go from here,
That word is familiar, it rhymes with cheer.
Lets just forget it and go have a beer.
So many clues you must be near.
Well I think he has taken a long haul,
Thank goodness he missed the wall.
And yes his first name is Paul.
Now I know you have it, not a surprise,
Or did I just pull wool over your eyes.
Well you don’t get off that easy,
Cause I am still feeling queasy.
It is three words, we are looking for,
Call me when you have it and nothing more.
Go back to the beginning, remember what was said.
Maybe something will pop in your head.
Yes the bats are a very big clue
Just remember this, their were only two.
The bugs the bugs what light does shine,
Maybe two to help this rhyme.
Oh that sounds so good to me,
And don’t forget the number three.
Three words it is, we need to know,
Wonder if the reverend will tell us so.
Oh my look what you said,
Just something off the top of my head.
But you almost spelt the second word,
How can that be, you are absurd.
I cant remember, was he riding somewhere,
On that night, its not clear.
Foggy it is, misty too, its so dark,
That’s how they knew.
The ride is known throughout the land,
And so famous is the man.
That’s all you get, and please done fret,
You have to know it I’ll bet I’ll bet.

Details | Limerick | |

The Ark (Limerick)

From God Noah received a great plan 
Build an Ark stay on dry land 
people stared and squawked 
some came and laughed 
Until flood sailed it like a can

Details | Rhyme | |

Joker Joe

                   Joker Joe
      ©2012 C. Brent Cloyd

Vice President Biden is prone to gaff
But his debate strategy was to laugh
With smirk and grin told things that were not so
That’s how we will remember Joker Joe

Details | I do not know? | |

AP history

AP history 
What a misery

AP history 
What a misery

Quizzes, tests
I took the class
To rest

AP history
What a misery

Too hard of work
Too many words

AP history
What a misery

All the tension
Put around the
Document based question

AP history
What a misery

How I passed
The class
Is a mystery

AP history 
What a misery

Details | Verse | |

Solanum Tuberosam

Eight million years ago
	In the mountains of Peru
Solanum tuberosum,
	Common ‘spud’ to me and you,
Was discovered by a native,
	This I tell you for it’s true
		There is nothing a potato cannot do.

This may come as a surprise -
	From the continent of China,
Where they grow McDonald’s fries,
	To the coast of California
To be served in Eddie’s Diner,
	To the caterer, what a prize !
		There is nothing a potato cannot do.

They’re so versatile you know
	And so popular on trips,
Fast-food’s greatest dish ‘to go’,
	Whether pommes frites, fries or chips
All the children love them so –
	Put some inches on your hips !
		There is nothing a potato cannot do.

Whether roasted, mashed or boiled
	Dauphinoisse or yet, sauté,
Mighty sobering when well oiled,
	The potato rules OK !
A reward when hard you’ve toiled –
	Eat some taties every day,
		There is nothing a potato cannot do.

Subterranean tubers bold,
	All around the world are found
And in every country sold –
	These guys really get around,
One day global power to hold
	They wait quietly underground,
		For there’s nothing  a potato cannot do.

Details | ABC | |

Where Are They Now

Mary had a little lamb that soon became someone's chops
That's a lie, a mouse never runs up a clock, only in the Boondocks
Little Miss Muffett sat on the Spider
Jack and Jill went up a hill, Jack killed Jill and tried to hide her
Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard, there was no bone for the dog
Little Boy Blue got lost in the London Fog
Remember Little Jack Horner
He was put in a Roundhouse and told to sit in the corner
The Three Little Pigs were smoked and placed on the table
Goldi Locks visits The Three Bears more often now that they have Cable
Four and twenty Blackbirds were baked in a pie
The wolf was an assassin from the Government, Grandma was a suspected 
foreign spy
Green Eggs and Ham 
 According to the FDA are now just as dangerous as Spam
Acoording to the Police, there was no Giant and Jack never had a Beanstalk
He was just stoned from his Marijuana crop
Georgie Porgie later became better known as Boy George
The Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe, still trying to hunt the fathers down for child 
Most of these celebrities wish to stay out of the spotlight
Twinkle Twinkle the Little Star dropped out of school and today is not so bright

Details | Rhyme | |

Evolution Phooey

What caused a social convolution was Darwin’s Theory of Evolution. This did not cause much mirth. It radically changed the history of the earth. He said any homo sapiens I can see are descended from the gorilla and the monkey. Homo sapiens includes you and me. Anyone who says I come from a primate class is going to get a good swift kick in the ass.

Details | Rhyme | |

A Toast To Mom

oh the weather outside is frightful
and having snowball fights were so delightful

getting hit in the butt and head
then laughing cause you start seeing red

hooking on car bumpers for a little ride
wearing tennis shoes we did slip and slide

mama yelling to get off or you'll be dead
we never listened to what she had said

socks for gloves to keep little hands warm
even amidst a blizzards storm

soaked from head to foot
looking like santa's outfit full of soot

but what I remember about fun the most
was waiting for mama's hot coco and apple butter toast

on that speical Christmas morning day
before the Lord had came and taken her away

   {R.I.P. Mama}

Happy Holidays All
Love Kathy And Jenny

Also Entry For 
Deborah Guzzi's
Holiday Songs In Poem Form
Gl All

Details | I do not know? | |

Silly Me

Silly me
Eve gave me an apple
But I was on a diet
Ate spinach instead

Details | Burlesque | |

The Sheakspeare Paradox

there's something wrong here,
something wrong with what we're taught
teaching us things that amount to naught
or preposterous suggestions we have "bought"

take Sheakespeare......
the guy used a feathered pen and ink
I doubt if he even had a spear!!!
such a notion, to me seems very queer...

and if, in fact, a spear he had....
why would he shake it??
was he some kind of crazy lad?

I don't understand, and never will,
the things they teach us are such swill.

Details | I do not know? | |

Don't forget the sausages

Pop down to the shops Son
I need some bits and bobs
Just a few potatoes
And a dozen crusty cobs
While you’re there, you might as well
Get carrots and some greens
Some frozen peas, some sugar
And a tin of Heinz baked beans
Some tea, I think we need some
Minced beef for shepherds pie
A pound of cheese, the Leicester
We’ll give that one a try
We haven’t any biscuits
You know the ones I like
Only get two packets, mind
Be careful on your bike
When you get back I’ll do some
Bread and dripping for your tea
A slice of bread and scrape for you
And sausages for me

© John W Fenn  03-07-2009

Details | I do not know? | |

My Imperfections Thats Just Me

I'm a girl of imperfection, that's just who i am.

Sometimes I give up doing things when i don't think i can.

I'm a horrible liar but i sometimes still try.

They say my give away is something in my eyes.

They tell me I'm to passive and that i need to stand my ground.

Yet when i become a brat(altered for site)....

nobody wants me around.

I am Sagatarious and as stubborn as can be.

I bet on number 9 cus false hopes tell me it's lucky.

My number never wins but i play it anyway.

The dreamer inside me is waiting for that day.

I use bad grammer and stumble on my words.

Sometimes i talk so's hard to be heard.

Some friends call me pokey cus i move at my own pace.

I will get there eventually cus my life is not a race.

I'm a girl of imperfection...that's never gonna change.

Even when you know me, you'll still think i am strange.

Sometimes I'm frustrating and even annoy myself.

I take things for granted and I envy others wealth.

I love the smell of roses but i think Daisy's are the best.

Sometimes I eat the pettles and throw out all the rest.

I love to drive when theres more then just me.

Slug bug gets boring with just the car seat.

I have been known to snore when i sleep.

Bad dreams cause me to grind my teeth.

I was once told I was laughing hard in my sleep.

Still today i wish to remember that dream.

Forgotten forever like a stranger passing by.

The one that made me laugh without saying hi.

Occasionally im clumsey and I'm often being rushed.

Be careful with feelings are easily crushed.

I'm modest about my feelings so you would probrably never know.

But if you lie, cheat, or steal from me their sure to one day show.

I consider myself a passive woman...never lookin for a fight.

I was raised to use my words to stand up for what is right.


Details | Free verse | |

Debate This {Poetry In Motion}

political debate
blah blah blah garble garble garble
I approve this message

Written by Willy Makeit
Illustrated by Betty Don't   LOL

See You At The Polls LOL

Details | Prose Poetry | |

A Whiff of Canterbury Tails

 Feedback comes to those who apply and post and expect to receive the same 
when you place a silver dollar in your mouth you scratch it with your teeth to see if 
it is real a man bites down upon it and then looks and frowns or looks and 
smiles upon the quarter he has found not silver or even golden but just metal of 
some kind its zinc and copper mixes made in Betty Crocker's Kitchens. She has 
a tray of circles all lain out upon her divine divan the tails side up for luck she got 
this from the JESUS man who tossed his penny in an arc and tried to hit a mark 
a line drawn in the sand and made his feet go march to live a different plan a 
lifetime being mended his only love he found she makes the things he feels 
inside brand new. She stirs her better batter up with a long and spindly spatula 
she marks each coin with edges with the cheese garter greater. She takes the 
grater to the table and turns each coin by hand she makes four of them for every 
dollar in this land. They asked her who is on the image of the coin she laughed 
and dimpled smiling she said it must be Dollar Bill.  The George Washington 
Dollar is the image used for the quarter he gets to be on two. When yew become 
the President Of America you can be their two. She stamps the quartered dollars 
on the side that just says heads with the handy dandy stamper set she got from 
her Uncle Jed for Christmas Past. She turns the coins at last and makes the tails 
with her old eagle eye she uses her new leather set to scritch and scratch the 
bird the lines formed from habit of making millions in a set in just one day she 
filled the Island of Manhattan with 24 additional sets they said they needed them 
to buy Manhattan again the previous treaty had run out from the statue of 
limitations set back in Washington against the law must be obeyed by every 
man. When eye am making a bus ride and eye find a lot of pennies eye ignore 
them when eye find a quarter eye do a little more than dance in place eye jig eye 
jog eye trip on every log in my haste to find three more it costs one dollar just to 
Board the Tran. Betty declined to speak just to the press for she is very shy she 
said she knoes now who the image is on the flip side of her coin and eye did not 
keep a dry eye when she smiled at me and said without a tremor or a miss it is 
Washington, D. C. 

Details | Narrative | |

I'm Just What Your Looking For

since the year of 1952 the city of st paul Minnesota holds
their annual treasure hunt the king and queen of snows
goes out to a city park and hides a medallion worth
10,000 dollars if you are the winner and your carnaville
button is register with the st paul pioneer press
which gives out 12 cryptic clues and this little medallion
could be wrapped in just about anything from diapers to cookies 
and the frigid weather here just may make you want to just
stay by the fireplace and sip on hot coco with family and friends
even lucky finder gets to ride along with the king and queen of snow
in the closing ceremony of it's torchlight parade
also watch out for the vulcans krewe for they like to dethrone the king
and leave you with a black smudges across your sweet cheeks

Tribute To The Winter Carnaville

Carnaville runs
Jan 21-31 

Also Entry For
Carolyn Devonshire's
Christmas In Your Town Contest

Details | Free verse | |


We each must believe in something to exist

Whether self is king or that in certain vice
To delegate a chance or that in some roll of the dice
Some our content in stoic & mundane
Wile others our frankly mentally insane

For the mighty God has done great things for me

Within pivotal yet fruitless gain or from borrowed chase
A reckless abandonment to an empty corpse shell
An angelic fervor of sorted chasm intact 
For stregnth comes in like a flood

Just suppose we just faintly disagree
This does not negate the real fact of spiritual equality
We each represent a stoic source in truth
Yet devided we sore vex call it a viable truce

Through a barrage in ample demonstrative approach to appease

For the mighty God has done great things for me
With painted stone freshly on the outside patio decorum intact
Tolerance is never an issue anymore
Set in stone its attributes deminish through a slight in hand

Hoping that someday soon we will surely live to understand

For the mighty God has done great things for me
With his mercies endure from age to age
Through frolic in twilight pasture
In ardent song within its smoked filled room laughter

This in effect prepares no one for the great here after?

Details | Rhyme | |

Richard's Game Show

For an animal spelled with three letters, somebody said “frog”. Why didn’t he think with an answer such as “cat” or “dog”? Another family member answered the same question a little later. His response unbelievably was the long word “alligator”. The same contestant had to name something in a summer storm. His strange reply of “snow” was a little out of the norm. The family needed two hundred points to win the grand prize. Their total was nowhere near that which was no surprise. Mr. Dawson, how did they get such dumb families on the show? Is that what you called entertainment? I would really like to know.

Details | Lyric | |

Historical Heros

What's up with all this hatred in the world?
Off the top of my head I can name at least three people that could always see the "big
Dr.King used his knowledge and his speaking abilities to persuade people to become one.
Rosa Parks endured hardship just 'cause she sat in the front of the bus.
Malcolm X preached with authority and truancy.

Oops, I guess I can name four 'cause Michael loved the trees.
I'm not talking about the basketball star but the one who I always pray to before I dance.
I feel like I owe something to them but I always screw up.

I can make anything happen in my head but when it comes to words, It's better to let
Motormouth say the words in a two second story.
Why is it that no one kid WANTS to remember these names?
They were key players in this world in trying to make the world a better place.

"Yes we can" is what Obama said but are our hearts content?
We still do the idiotic things we did before but at least we don't have Bush to encourage
our rage.

Details | Clerihew | |

Nation Wrecker

Helen of Troy
so excited her boy
that he sent all of his off to war.
It ended, of course,
with some men in a horse
and Helen little more than a whore.

Details | Free verse | |

Facsimiles burst in the jungle

Facsimiles burst in the jungle
Gestures pulling paint off the wall
I've seen it all
Crouched, hideaway consumer companion choice
Urgency gather fervently
Upsetting the sewage balance

Garden shears hanging sturdy frames
Blue collar bastion glowing brain
A belt buckle preacher enlivened struggle
Suicide ransom beneath the huddle

I'm making waves
And riding them too
Street animal casting feather balloons
Whispering a marching tune

Details | Light Poetry | |

The English gent

An English gent, if you can find a real one
Is the sort of chap that’s never agitated
He will stand his ground amid the fiercest battle
Resolute, until the fighting has abated
An English gent is never ever flustered
But there’s one thing that always makes him wild
His spotted dick must only come with custard
The kind he had when he was still a child
The English gent will rally when the call comes
Will die just to defend the greater good
March off to the beating of the war drums
Just as long as you serve custard with his pud

Details | Light Poetry | |


Sorry if I came here illegally

My country lacked opportunity

So this is how it had to be

Never took anything from you

Paid my taxes just like you

Society let the color of my skin in

But shamed my people and culture

I chased the American dream

As Americans wanted all my people to leave

I adapted to your culture

Your way of life

What more can I do

To say that I truly appreciate the red,white and blue

Thank you for reading. Visit for more poems and writings that I have written.

Details | Free verse | |

In Need Of Therapy

Ulysses Rudolph Roberts
a Federalist by default
laid on the couch
and spilled out his guts
to a women he
envisions to be
the ultimate 
siren of shrinks.
With her hair in a bun
books, glasses
and that half buttoned
blouse thing.
He cried and he shook
over the battles he fought
and how everything
that ever happened
was never his fault.
After all
he would reason
he had built
the best fortress
in all God's Kingdoms
with ultra thick walls
turrets and draws.
The tallest
strongest and soundest
in all worlds.
So what if he had to kill
capture and rape
in order to feed 
the armies he made
he had God's blessings
His sacred grace.
Yet, Ulysses was
still cowering in the arm
of an old red couch
and crying out loud
It's Not My Fault!
as the Doctor scribed

Dean Walker

Details | Limerick | |

Holy Rasputin

There once was a sage man named Rasputin,
With filthy beards, and wore cross made of tin.
While preaching his holy crafts,
He met the queen and her staffs.
He slept with them that got him in a bin.

Details | Narrative | |


Getting into the Christmas spirit,
by examining my introspection
and making new plans for the future;
and sparking up your imagination...
could anyone imagine me dressed
as Santa Claus, who never has the minimal time
to watch a log consumed by a crackling fire?
Think again, I could be that Saint Nicholas so bold! 

Prejudice is not a part of this Christmas Season,
all kinds of people, of different ages and races, 
celebrate it; and it may vary from country to country
with traditions as far as Saturnalia or Yuletide...
that was a time when pagans started this festivity,
and with the birth of Jesus, the Christians
adopted these traditions as their own...
so should we object and put them aside?    

Getting into the Christmas spirit,
unpacking decorations for my new Christmas Tree, 
from boxes that waited too long for this day of joy;
and even my toddler, Jack, comes downstairs tripping,
handing me Grandma's favorite star, which
she had hidden away into a treasure chest so jealously,
to place on the top of this forest-scented pine tree...
when we all gather and sing," Silent Night."  

Getting into the Christmas spirit, 
adding, not taking away names from my long list;
and even though these are tough economic times,
I plan to be generous to all without feeling the pinch!
Give the very best of your intentions,
either in gift or in warmest embrace;
give and be content to catch that infant's smile in the distance; 
the tender smile of the Holiest Child, who will give of Himself!  

Copyright 2009 by Andrew Crisci

Details | Free verse | |

Click, Click, Click

Click, click, click
Stop! Wagons in caravan
Wheel has loose part
Weak wagon wheel
Results, have to trail on end
Can't stop to fix broken wheel
Click, click, click

Indians sit upon
Fast Mustangs on the ridge
With arrows resting in bows
Not just for a show
Click, click, click
Come on horse let's go
Need the safety of the group
Click, click, click
Please don't go

Details | Rhyme | |

Let's Duke It Out

I was born in nineteen sixty nine
just off the block and in my prime
now let me introduce you to 
some pertty good friends of mine

Let's start with my uncle Jesse
to me he looks like he's ninety nine
but I love to watch him when he
takes nips from his moonshine 

Here's my owners Bo and Luke 
cousins of a kind just hanging out
with Daisy who looks 
so sweet and so darn fine

But There's some other folks
that just don't like our kind
its those sheriff folks thats
watching the hazzard county line

Starting with their fearless leader Boss Hogg
Who's radioing all the frigging time to
Cooter and Davenport And to that rascal
Rosco P Coltrane who he cannot find

Now my life is such sweet devine
when your jumping in and out of my windows 
while running from those sheriffs from Georgia County line
in my general lee waving a confederate flag thats in it's prime
Honking my horn to a dixie tune of same kind

Tribute To The Dukes Of Hazzard LOL

Also Entry For
Christopher Higgin's 
Get Your Rebel On!

Tho This Poem Is Not About A Person 
Changing My Life But The Time Era Did
And Something About That Show Changed Me
About Opening Your Heart And Home To All

Details | Rhyme | |

Hey Dude

Hey dude you think your so bad
you went out and shot your dad
just cause he dressed in plaid
reminded you of that dick channey lad

Hey dude dont feel so scared
for you should of seen my standing hairs
while you were pointing that shotgun everywhere
just glad it wasn't I standing so close there

And to think dude my heart didn't jump
come a little closer for I think I just took a dump
but let me go check behind  this nice little stump
cracking a smile all the way from my rump

Hey dude your so gross
but its you who I love the most
as I raise this shotgun and toast
I see you running for the coast

So run dude as fast as you can
from any guy thinking they have a safe plan
let them go and join another rock band
for you can still think your life is so grand

Hey dude you think your so bad
now your the one dressed in all plaid
thirthy years for shooting that dad
now dick chaney's singing sorry and it's so sad

La La La La 
La La La La

Hey dude

Footnote  I Chose Hey Jude

Tribute To Gun Safty

Also Entry For John Heck's
Beatlemania Sing-Along
GL All

Details | Free verse | |


If there comes a day
when the preacher's politicians
control the state
Phinehas will rise from his grave
round up the gays
and send them down 
to Guantanamo Bay
to entertain the Muslims.
The Kingdom's minions 
will hammer in the heads
of our tender young 
the creation in seven drub
social welfare is evil
and God's top ten rules.
Which I must say
rules are meant to be broken.
And if that day comes 
when our children must pray
and Jesus is the only way
I and my liberal 
secular humanist
will be taken out back 
beaten naked and shot
for refusing to accept
that Christ died for us.
Or worse yet
sent to a re-eduction camp
to sing Cumbaya.
Unless, of course
we move to Canada.

Dean Walker

Details | Rhyme | |

Columbus Day

In 1492, we’re told,
Columbus sailed the seas.
He thought he’d get to India,
But had no guarantees.

We learned in school about his ships
And how from Spain he sailed.
He made it to our shores and so,
He only partly failed.

We’ve honored him for many years.
There’s no sign we’ll be stopping;
And so, to celebrate the day,
We’ll spend our free time shopping!

Details | Sonnet | |

Global Trot

I’m out of my mind but I am just perfect and just fine.
I went around the world and what a blast it was for me.
I’m sent with a message from a golden gate master key.
I shook I rattled and I rolled brand new maps I did align.

I founded you and I demolished you but swam like a fish in line.
I ran to and fro as I was left behind thrown forward but I did see.
It is a global trot I tell you to survive naked or dressed just to be.
And then it came to be true and real that this was mine all mine.

So I sit in the seat with no defeat.
The world goes stupid and so mad,
But I stay clean and of course neat,
It’s just a silly little one time life fad.

Pain and suffering has just about killed me and you,
Together or apart it is a world we will always renew!

®Registered: Ann Rich   2009

Details | Bio | |

My Bio

My name is Mr. Moore,
And I’m 5’2”.
If you’re a young a black male,
I care about you.
I am the father of two daughters,
And the husband of one.
I believe in running,
Until the race is done.
I appreciate music,
I appreciate it much.
I am a drummer,
With a distinct touch.
I enjoy the sound of a saxophone,
And if you mention Jesus Christ,
I play both drums,
And sax by ear.
I can play the rhythmic notes,
If they are near.
I like counting money,
Because I’m crazy about math.
I have a little "hooping" skills,
So don’t get in my path.
I had coached for five years,
Being champs of the final three.
Was put out at the buzzer,
The first two were defeats.
I had been with “The Academy”,
For eight years now.
“Tricks of the Trade”,
Was about showing young men how.
I am unique,
And like a little rhythm.
That is why I wrote,
“My Bio” to be a poem.

Details | Acrostic | |

Home Improvement ... (acrostic)

Here I am

Pals to
May be
Not just
This temporary accomodation.

Details | List | |

Another Taste Of Tom's Tiny Tidbits of Trash

A few more words/ phrases I can do without;

"24/7"- I just can't seem to divide 24 by 7.
"But wait!!!... If you act right now....."- "Just how brain atrophied are you?
"We'll double your offer....."  (more to come on this)- Mays can always amaze...  
that insolent slut!
Would somebody please tell me just how many 8 oz. glasses of water are in the 
Atlantic ocean??  Who left the faucet dripping?
For years I thought LOL meant Land of Lakes cheese...I wondered just how 
many cheese freaks on the internet.....Just too key happy to cook?
Finally- a true historical story (well, I Was a history major, you know!).  Calvin 
Coolidge was a rather odd president...his nickname was "Silent Cal".  He rarely 
used his vocal cords...maybe they were disengaged from his cerebrum...  Well, 
anyway, at a formal White House dinner, seated next to him was some actress or 
some other form of high inellect... She turned to Calvin (No, he wasn't wearing 
jeans!), and comfidently said...."I've bet everyone here I can make you say three 
words. So he turned to her, and said, laconically (don't ya love these $10 words 
I've been parading for some reason lately!?),  "You Lose!"  Wish Bush would 
follow his example!  Carry On Cleo!!!

Details | Light Poetry | |

Connie, Denise, And Cochise

Amid 240 units of toil
Reigns my Connie
Where she walks
Is blessed soil

California sun
To match her hair,
No nature's beauty
Could compare

Sitting at a table,
With her friend Denise,
Mulling over a
Possible lease...
To an Indian
named Cochise...

Will he pay in wampum
Or scalps he'd taken,
Or Indian souvenirs,
Or maybe he's fakin'

Maybe he's
really from Jersey
Or maybe he's not...
Will he want
To keep buffalo
In the parking lot?

Will arrows fly
When he gets mad?
Will he smoke 
odd stuff
When he is sad?

Erect a teepee
In his living room?
Keep six squaws
To dispell his gloom?

Ride his horse 
bareback to work...?
Feathered head
that he can shake?

Or suit and tie,
Briefcase at his side,??
Laptop computer
Covered in cowhide??

It's a mystery,
As you can see...
Time will soon tell
What will be.

I'll let you know
how it turns out,
And even though
You likely doubt,
This story that
I'm telling you...
Yet, it's possible,
that it  just might
be true.

Details | I do not know? | |


This was a time when humans were new,
before stress in our lives, caused us to brew.

When survival meant eating dino doo doo and
grunting was the language everyone knew.

As time went by, certain gestures arose,
like to push or kick or to club ones foes.

Then one day, a strange man had appeared,
he had this defect that everyone feared.

Most of his features were normal you see,
but his two middle fingers, grew like a tree!

The words he could speak were so very few,
yet he blurted some garble, my name EPH EWE!

He’d use these fingers to knock others down,
make them feel hurt and give them a frown.

He could make someone sad, others got mad,
for his fingers were weapons like nobody had.  

He would fling them about and proudly exclaim,
EPH EWE! He would grunt, continuing his reign.

To this day his name is a worldwide phrase,
as the gesture of fingers became a big craze.

Most get offended when receiving this sign,
but don’t hesitate to use it… if so inclined. 

So if ever you wish to make someone frown,
make them feel bad or just put them down,
just whip out the fingers and call out his name,
for EPH EWE, is the symbol, that keeps us all sane!

Details | Light Poetry | |


i could help it
as i sip
at a bar
where ever you are
near or far
with you gone am alone
and theses or no lies
in bed my head
missing  you too

Details | I do not know? | |

"Interpretations of....A Rackatackle Shaborous...."

Lightning and thunder, with torrents of rain, pouring down....

Interpretations....Dream sequences....Dreams....

Freud and Young....Einstein....Professor, whats his name?

Modern analysis....Scientific breakthroughs....Philosophies....

Profiles and treatments....IQ,s, and I use....Possibilities, and, I'm there?

A universe, of a box of chocolates, and, a hat full of tricks....

Spilled upon the pages....A galaxy of stages....Here today, but, how long?

Gypsies, astrologies, crystal balls, and, all....

The wheel of fortune....Fortune tellers....Great names, great days, great minds

Great great great great....Look to the east, for the origin....

It all, began there....Thousands of years ago....And so, they say?

The 'Great Empire of Rome'....'The Zulus'....'The Aztecas'....Etc., etc.

The this, that that, the the, the, the....'The Lost City of Atlantis'

'The Egyptian Sphinx'....'Metropolis'....Metropolis, and, Gotham City

The origin of man....The great explosion....The infusion....

Presto....Pick a card....How'd they do that?

Interpretations, analagies, philosophies, the sciences, and

The blades....The shades....The maids....You've come a long way?

Dream sequences....All the thoughts....And, all the things....

Modern days....Ancient days....Darkened days....Enlightened days....Days, days, daze!

Interpretations....What do you mean? Let me see....

How far, how clear, how near, how, how , how?

What can any of it, what can any of this, 'This,' do for me?

For my eyes shall close, within a wink, before, I can even, 'Breathe!'

Today, is your lucky day....Your future, bodes well....

Jupiter isn't a planet, its a star~Your a star~And

Man, he was once an ape....And, I can turn that scar, into, a face....

Oh yes, this is, your lucky day....We can now add, ten years to your life

And yes, we do have, a nursery, full of eyes....Green or blue? Perhaps, lavender for you?


Details | Elegy | |

She loved one

She could feel it in her bones.

Chills promising her she would

would never be alone.

I cried the night he left, he

just went away leaving me with

a scar of sweet memories. I held

him dear to me he was the only one

who I had led to my heart and opened

the door. 

He didn't deserve it, oh no he didn't

But he was the one she loved and as the

tears dropped she turned to stone.

Details | Ballad | |

Texas Jack

Ol' Texas Jack he wandered,
He wandered far and wide,
With cactus spikes a blanket,
Locoweed his temporary bride.
And when Ol' Texas Jack was shot
Straight dead---he very nearly died.

But his horse, a sandy mare she was,
Rode in from ancient Mexico.
She kissed him once betwixt the eyes---
He jumped right up
Where his tombstone lies!

Yeah, when Ol' Texas Jack was shot,
Wild Bill was by his side.
He told me this tale I tell to you,
And they both went off to ride.

And if you go to Laramie or maybe
Tombstone too, you'll see them
Playing extras!  They'll sit rite next to you!
The pay's real good and the grubs alrite,
And if you stay up all night,
You'll see them riding in the mist.
They're gone.  Turn off the lights.

Details | Lyric | |

imma triplethreat

ima triplethreat
im clamin the flame
and during ice age
i was the comet that came
))))HIT IT(((

Details | Blank verse | |


Nothing Common In This World Is Given Freely,
Without Some Kind Of Out-Standing "Bill" No Matter
What The Case Everything, And Everyone Demands
A Price N' Cost Before The Ransome Note Is Given.

Standing There As They Change Thier Plea, Ragging 
On About The Consequences Time Has Stopped
And Paid It's Dues....

Wait Behind These Bared Doors And I
Can Question To Revel The Real Reason's
Why They Keep Us Captive.

Taxes It"s Called The Bill Of Rights "Act"
Which Was Signed Further Adue...
Even With "Bill Clinton At Hand As President
I Say: What The Hell We're All Imprisioned

Details | Free verse | |

Cogitating Chianti

Coagulated cogitating
as the result of partying with Jim Beam
or was it my buddy Bud?

Moonshine mulligrumps
from a chianti hang over
the edge of a pledge.

Thinking drinking leads
to stinking thinking
someone cogently said
but, stinking thinking
is exactly whats in my head.

So a little bubbly
brings a smile for a while
and a blank slate
upon which to cogitate.

Details | I do not know? | |

Flat Busted

There once was a gal
From old southern Cal
Whose pageantry life went to hell
When she gave her impression
Of the gay-marriage question
And the protesting started to swell

Harassed and abused
Obligations refused
They wanted to take it all back
Give to somebody else
The fame and the wealth
For she was in breach of contract

But there’s one other wrinkle
You’ll laugh till you tinkle
They had given her other enhancements
Her chest grew a bit
And they paid for it
Now they claim it was just an advancement

So they’re suing her
For all costs and two-per
And they ask that she be readjusted
So in more ways than one
When it’s all said and done
Our gal just might end up flat-busted!

Details | Senryu | |


Germanic proverb
Do not squeeze the Charlemagne 
Sanguine pious prose

Details | Shape | |

To Whiten Teeth or NOT to


I *  E* H* M*A * urine.  Yuck
T*  T*  E* A*Y * urine.  Yuck
E*  H***  N**  * urine.  Yuck
Whitener was urine.  Yuck!!!!

Details | Light Poetry | |


it come every year
to scare
you too
there those who
they dress a mess
to get attention
i like to mention
its just a them not a dream
for people to blend

Details | Narrative | |

I Hold No Fear

Tomorrow comes and oh God how it goes!
Do I care, why should I lend all of my spares? 
I’ll never know what tomorrow holds!
“Oh my”, how could I, what is it that I need to do?
Blessed by God, sure he loves me but what about you?
Why today and why tonight I really don’t care! 
I know that I love me no matter what my eyes can see!
Take it all but hold the very last thought that we share! 
My God, My God how I hope you all know what it is that you truly believe!
“Oh my”, capture and redeem my mind!
Complete my being that lives alive inside of me!
God you love me, these eyes have no doubt with that which they can see!
“God”, you know you have done all of this to me! 
Oh how you have loved these things that I can see!
Sheltered, protected, yet, condemned by that which I know you believe!
If I could, I think that I would, but oh God how I do stand here!
Come and get me with all of that, which I know you believe! 
Please God, just come take my all of me! 
I am still here my Lord and I hold no fear!
Tomorrow, hmm just another day for me to believe!
Oh well! Guess I’ll just have to see it through!
Ask me anything and I will tell you! 
I think we all know what it is that we should do!
Escaping the reality of what really should be, 
Oh God, I am so very here do you know what tomorrow will be? 
I’m still here my Lord and I am holding absolutely no fear!
Each morning the Sun rises to approach a brand new day. 
No doubt that I do love me!
Embraced with the thought that you have come just for me, 
I’m engulfed with this moment that I have finally achieved.
Oh my, I know that I could because I am coming to you. 
Where are you my Lord I just need to be so very near!
God you do love me! Oh how I knew that you always would! 
I’ve walked so many miles with you each and every single day, 
And I am still right here my Lord and I hold no fear!


Details | Free verse | |

My unlucky car.

                   I brought it for one thousand pounds in 1982
                             Second hand you understand not new.
                         No it wasn't an Austin or ford,
                        humble three wheeler,
                           plastic pig to me and you.
                  I was the proudest person on the road,
                 four months later, i was many off the road.
                 Because it was so light the wind caught it  like a kite.
                  It skidded on its side rolled on its roof,
                   with witness gaping for living proof
                   After the damage was assessed ,Ifelt like wringing the mechanics 
                   One hundred fifty pounds scrap,
                  five hundred pounds repair,
                 I left in deep despair.
                  Eventually Ihad it repaired drove one year accident free.
                 Four months later I passed my test,
                 so I did what I thought was best.
                  I sold it for five hundred and borrowed the rest.

                  Though fate was to strike again,
                    this time a fork lift was to blame.
                    Again the damage was five hundred,
                  so the new owner did the same.

                    Except bringing her back from repair she bolted,
                            like a startled mare.
                     A blow out was the course, a ditch the only course.
                        So if you see lal865p    
                       look and stare and thank your lucky stars,
                                she wasn't yours.

Details | Free verse | |

Wrong Planet

I seem to be on the wrong planet
Not 100% sure how or why
I'm telling you this truely
You know I would not lie
I left my spaceship briefly
And soon began to cry

What kind of planet lets bullets wiz about
People dying for their God
If that's what their God wants
I'd rather pray to sod

I crane my neck, I scratch my head
I look to find some reason
Perhaps on this planet so alien
It's people hunting season

I guess I'll have to chalk this site out
No intelligent life I see
No one on my world, I trust
Would ever believe me

I think I'll snatch a sample,
Of this race so wild
O'sama is my choice
So typical a child

Gods that demand murder
Are unkown on my home
And if it takes 10,000 years
I know that I must roam
To find the answer to this puzzle
And hopefully end this poem

I've seen slug-creatures with more morals
I've seen craters on many a moon
But if I ever come back here
I swear it'd be too soon.

Details | Bio | |

Second Bathroom

Another true tom tale

Many years ago,
1971 or 72,
We had only one bathroom
Normally that would do

I had to pee real bad,
The bathroom occupied
Another tom brainstorm
Why not use outside?

But I was young and stupid
Lazy as all hell,
Now I'm the older version,
Of yet a stupider tom bell

So opened the back door
Only 4 houses on our block
No one ever likely
To see my eager "bladder clock"

Soon on I had a stream going
When I finally raised my head
To spot a vision
That filled me full of dread

Our next door neighbor's wife
On lawn chair and with book
Seemed to be fixated watching me
And the bizarre action that I took

I guess she thought "Oh Pervert!"
Would never would I question why
All I know is
That that moment I could die

Did not leave the house for a week
Feeling stupid, and mighty meek
So if you gotta' go real bad
And can't wait no more
Do it in your pants
And not out your back door.

Details | Verse | |

Recalling the Recall

Civilly shivily,
Golden State voters said
they should have Arnold			
to lead them, you bet!

Hasta la vista Babe,
Big Terminator is
not finished yet.

Details | Burlesque | |


Rich people can afford to live lavishly,
squandenring money like it werent a commodity;
ordinary folks must make ends meet,
even worrying about the food they eat!

Wealth moguls like Trump or Gates
can purchase the Empire State Building,
and see their names in the Entrepreneur or Money magazine...
while we dispute those outrageous credit card rates!
Since Caesar imposed taxes on the Roman Empire,
freedom to spend,at will, has been reduced by desire;
now Uncle Sam is the new emperor demanding his tribute,
woe to us if we declared ourselves immune!  

Republicans and Democrats are divided on one issue:
the Iraq's war on terrorism and its credibility not so true;
while Bush's voice echoes throughout the White House' walls..
a President's courage shown in formidable ways!

The music and art world are giving in frivolity,
creating works that are insignificant and full of obscenity;
can the Human Race excel as it did yesterday...
who will step forward and stop all this insanity?

Living lavishly is only shared by the lucky ones 
who are defined by abundance and inheritance,
but living sparingly is based on sacrifice and endurance...  
learning those thrifty tactics and live within limits!

Details | Burlesque | |

Something Odd Going On!!

It's a tad bit perplexing,
What I seem to see,
Russian soldiers in my backyard,
Can this really be?
And a Russian periscope,
Protruding from the ground,
How with this will I cope?
I guess I'm not mentally sound...

And why is there a Japanese
bulldozer in my kitchen too,
Is someone playing tricks?
Is that someone you?

And now a Sherman tank,
Sits in my living room,
"Hey, come on fellows,
are you predicting my
eminent doom?

Now I've seen it all,
Cause what do you think,
The mighty liner Titanic,
Sailing in my sink!!

Details | Rhyme | |

Hee Haw

                                             Hee Haw

                                             Hee Haw

                                    Come join Buck and Roy 
                                for some picking and grinning 
                                             for us all

                                             Hee Haw

                                             Hee Haw

                                    Now look at Junior and Lula
                                        Giving a big salute
                                   from the corn fields so tall

                                            Hee Haw
                                            Hee Haw

                       There goes Granpa Jone and String Bean
                                 Slapping their chest and knees
                             To a banjo and a harmonica's call

                                            Hee Haw

                                            Hee Haw

                                 Let's listen to Jim and John
                                    Sernading to the gals
                               of Kornfield's lumber shaw

                                           Hee Haw

                                           Hee Haw

                         Now don't forget about Minnie Pearl
                            and her straw hat with tag
                    swinging in the breeze from a yodel caw

                                          Hee Haw

                                          Hee Haw

                     Well folks it's time to wrap up this salute 
                          for all those who gave it their all
                        from the wacked out show known as 

                                            Hee Haw

                                            Hee Haw

Tribute To 
The Cast And Crew Of
Hee Haw

Thanks For The Laughs

Buck Owens

Details | I do not know? | |

Voices in the wind

    A tear drop falling into space I hear you voice and I go crazy. It's something I 
can't explain. Maybe it's someone that sounds like you, But I can hear it and I know that 
it's you. At least that's what my mind tells me. I get all nervous and look your way, 
maybe this is a mistake because I could deal with that. I want you so much and then I 
don't want to see you again because I don't want to deal with it. Isn't that smart? I 
want you with my body and soul but then my soul plays tricks and I just want to let you 
go. I can't feel like this, this isn't natural. I wanted all of you and now i'm afraid. 
What if you did suddenly appear out of thin air and walk right over to me. I wouldn't 
know what to say I would be completely star struck, your now a star but in my heart you 
make me weak to my knees and I can't stop. Shivering, stuttering being around you can get 
me that way. Maybe it's not meant to be. Honestly please, I don't want to be that nervous 
wreck girl see what you do to me. I can't hold on and I can let go but then again this is 
me and as I hear you voice in the wind I faint.

Details | Ballad | |

The Knight That Drove the Old Pixie Down

Virgin Brain is my name,
Served on the Disneyworld choo-choo
'Til my supervisor came,
and tore up my time card again...

In the summer of '95...
I joined the Templar Knights
Kind'a dig that kind of  jive....
By August the tenth,
My assignment to me had fell,
And it was one that would  lead me straight to hell...

The Knight I Drove the Old Pixie Down,
and tom bell was ringin'
The Knight I drove the Old Pixie Down,
and the children were singing,
The Knight Who Drove the Old Pixie Down!
They went; da, da, da, how friggin' dumb
da,da, da, your brain is numb
da, duh?, da, duh?, da, da, da!
da,  da, da, da, da, da, da....

Back in my tenement in Brooklyn,
When one day  a young cop did call me,
Virgin , come quick, you're wanted for robbery!!
Now I don't mind servin' time
But the food is no good,
Just be sure, the crime is mine...
Ya take the sentence given,
and ya gotta' serve your time..
But they never should
have taken...
My denim vest!

Like my mother before me,
I will work the ol' rockpile...
Like the guards above me,
I will seldom smile..
I was just dumb, stupid and niave
But the cops got me, so
they could save....
The little pixie I was stalking
Prepared to take her down,
And they got me just before
I was about to have found...
The nasty little pixie,
So evil and so sly,

No wonder someone had paid me,
To see that pixie die...

The Knight Who Drove Old Pixie Down,
The Knight Who Drove Old Pixie Down
And the stoolies were singin'
They went....Ya, ya, ya, he's guilty
Ya, ya, ya, ya, ya, ya, ya...

I swear by the ball and chain
On my feet
You can't release a con too soon....
When he's up for parole,
He'd have a better chance,
on the moon.....

Repeat chorus and fade...

Details | Rhyme | |

Gone are the days

Gone are the days of poodle skirts and bobbie socks,
classic cars and music that rocks.

The Ed Sullivan show and Elvis Presley’s gyrating hips,
guys racing their cars for pink slips.

No more drive-in theaters or soda shops,
forty-fives or school sock hops.

Penny Loafers or slicked back hair,
gas prices that are fair.

No more Howdy Doody time or black and white TV,
The Milton Berle Show or I Love Lucy.

Full service stations or diner girls on roller skates,
families cruising down route 66 to see the states.

An era when schools were safe and crime was low,
some of the best times one could ever know.

However time and technology has since moved on,
oh what a shame those days are gone.

Details | Free verse | |

The Egg

My three minute egg in boiling water,
Seventeen for hard-boiled, according to Julia,
Or fried in bacon grease for the trip to eternity
Two jaundiced eyes on my father's chipped plate,
Or butter for scrambled then cover 'em with catsup;
No resemblance here to the Faberge eggs
Covered with diamonds, rubies and pearls
For the pleasure of the Russian royal family.

Details | Burlesque | |


Me, me, Geonimo...
Don't know what way...
White man go...

Smoke'em signals...
Smoke'em pipe....
You run us off,
You kill squaw wife,

Steal our land,
Kill great Buffalo for fun,
We gott'em little chance,
Arrow against gun

Some day we get
Revenge real good,
Mak'em casino
In our hood....

You los'em shirt,
You los'em wife,
You los'em bet
Who win in this life.

Details | ABC | |


In a starry night
an adolescent thought starts
a rivalry. A baby moon squirms.
No hour was safe from terror in dark.
I climb the stairs breathlessly.

The great divide deepens in hearts.
Incisors bite the tongue,
grey cells bleed inside.
Thick ash has not stopped the cinders
smouldering under the veils of flushed peace.
Cupped tears wash the feet of death,
a caravan of words moves desolated,
cutting on the edges, before you say
goodbye to green vision.

Today I am pulling out the nails
from the walls. No hangings of departed centuries.
No portraits of exiled flames.
Only the face of truth, burning
at the interface of unthruths.


Details | Cowboy | |

Cowboy Diplomacy

Some say a cowboy’s ways is just too dramatic—
That he has a tough time bein’ diplomatic!
He may be ornery and a bit wild, ol’ son—
Unlike the UN or congress – he gets things done!

Liberals say with sneers that cowboys ain’t PC—
That bein’ honest is cowboy diplomacy.
But I’d rather be cowboy and speak my own mind,
Than a pile of what politicians leave behind!

I’m tired of hearin’ that anything cowboy’s bad—
We uphold fine traditions – that’s what makes me sad.
Ol’ cowboys and the West will never die away—
As long as cowboy diplomacy saves our day!

Details | Free verse | |

Midnight (My Secret Sin)

It all happens after midnight
Anywhere’s the place to be after midnight
The good times don’t start until after midnight
Exhale a lil pot
Swallow a pill with snot
Got tossed up, tattooed and don’t know where my leg went
Spooked, you just got tabooed for the next segment
At age four I lost half my finger in a door 
Foster parents pissed on it and said “It’ll be a little sore”
Who would’ve thought, I was enlisted to be poor
A year later I took a razor and suffocated my reflection
To the day I’d be locate above or below heaven
If I could follow directions
My principal tried to retain me as a senior
No harsh feelings, by midterms I’ll be 43 
With advances in misdemeanors 
Sidewalk is where I drive
No room for pedestrians
Hide and stalk, I’m surprised you’re still alive
Nothing gets under my skin
Like the homosexuality that ponders with straight men
And these truth commercials don’t speak
It’s like telling me if I piss in pull ups they won’t leak
Walked into a post marriage shower room
Lucky tostill be breathing
Memories flower my doom
Left OJ’s cold case and waltz into Scott Petersons
I’d be a lie if I said a killer you’re not
You dumb duck, you should have beat her with the gun
Meet her with the fun, send her a foreign son
Fall dead to the force of inertia
Either that or croak 
From not paying attention to these abstinence commercials  

Details | Ballade | |


The aches and pain I fill on my feet, is of wear and tear felt way down deep,
         from birth till today, I never seen them this way,
         two things that moved me the most, two things I thought were gross,
they've been there in the cold of winter, frost bit and splintered,
          exposed to the summer heat, never once did I cover my feet,
          brought me home drunk and a mess, climbed the mountains and life's little tests, 
they carried me off to my first and last day of school, went with me every time we moved,
           was there when I walked miles for my first kiss, even there when I missed,
           helped me stand when I took a fall, for them being there I couldn't crawl,
they took me to great heights and times, was even there when I committed a crime,
            held me up as I watched my children be born, & moms funeral as I morned,
            helped me teach my son to play ball, to tell him hold your head up stand tall,
they helped me lift my baby girl, to hold her point and show her the world,
              they carried me to all of there events, never once did I fill the dents,
             the scares,the bruising, never once did they indicate the misusing,
they've been cut, dry and poked, yet stood me up every time never once did they revoke,
              now years later I fill them cry out in pain, when I stand I fill the strain,
              I hear them as they crack, I fill them when I sit and relax, 
in life there is so many things that help you move on, love,friendship, even a song,
               not till were old do we see, that through time we couldn't do it with out feet,
               they were there when we took our first step, walked and crept,
they helped us skip,jump,and run, to my feet I owe you this one,
              "Life's been great, fun, romantic, hart wrenching, darkened and sweet,
                       as it comes to and end I can say I did it all on my own two feet." 

man, I wonder what I could write about my hands: )? 

Details | Prose Poetry | |

Toast of the Town

in this small village,
we have but one diner
I've sampled their menu before
and have but one complaint
the toast they serve with breakfast
seems like it came from bread
baked at the time of Ramses II

Details | Bio | |

pens word

Picked up the pen 
feeling so bored
why is it mightier
than any sword
Oh I know words can cut
and hurt a lot too
But a sword even dull
can cut one in two
Younger I threw one
To stick in a tree
It bounced spun
returning and near 
stuck in me
I'm not too sure when
I'll try throwing a pen

Details | Free verse | |


          Talk to me, Don't you know your my everything. 
          I spend every waking moment with 
          you next to me. 

          I feel you and I heal with you, your what I do when I can't sleep at night.

          If there weren't room for you then I wouldn't know what to do your just apart   
          of me and sometimes when I feel weak I call on you. 

          I remember your words of wisdom and use them on paper to express how I

          It's real, it's right the way that it flows I need that feeling every night.

          Hold on tight for another wild crazy ride. 

          I'm good at doing you, your good at not controlling me. 

          Helping me to flow free in an unexpected way.

          You know all of my secrets before  I even know them.
          Sometimes you say dumb things and force me to erase you but when I really need
          you your always there for me.

          That's why when I finish a sentence it's perfect because you listen
          without judging me.
          All and all I want to be with you forever... your my passion and my love and if 
          I fell I know you would rescue me.

Details | Free verse | |

St. Patricks Day

To the luck of the Irish is what they say
For today we celebrate St. Patrick's Day
With little leprechauns running around
Their gold still hiding, waiting to be found
With four leaf clovers across a breast
Their myth of luck was put to the test
Then before our eyes
What should we behold?
But a leprechaun shouting,
"I found me gold!"

Details | Ballad | |

Old 22

I'll never sell my old .22
cause that old .22
shot a gopher or two

I aim to the left
and a little low
cause that old .22 fires high 
and a little to the right.

So i'll never sell that old .22.

Details | Narrative | |



A narrative poem in the charlax stYle 

Benjamine: he hath an oder oh mye qyeen 


Qyeen: yes he smells just like my camels butt 


Benjamine: eye meanteth 

He has a poet in toe 


Qyeen: eye have a blister in toe it is on my left foot 


Benjamine: the poet in TOW is the bard 


Qyeen: a splinter from a board why are you so hard today to understandeth 


Benjamine: he brings the bard in tow to proselytize to readeth prose and poetry 


Qyeen: why would he carry the board that the splinter came from to show me his 
toe would sufficeth 


Benjamine: confusion reigns today 


Qyeen: He is my Asian cousine. 

Details | Name | |


When Sun delivers shine skin starts to burn,
Body is seeking protection from sharp rays.
Water vaporises and converts as clouds,
Rain comes and air delivers weather cold.

My son came to me and asks about natural system,
Why does rain come down, why don’t clouds go up?
If water evaporates with the heat waves,
And how clouds stay in the sky to cover rays?

Details | I do not know? | |

Snake Oil

Inability never stopped him
It made the journey interesting
Stupidity never slowed him How could he know failure?
Time never stopped him, he simply multiplied
Salt water never stopped him he left it 
Hunger hasn’t stopped him he’s devouring the earth
Who is this destroyer of Eden
This watery chemical force
Is there a cure? 

YES  somewhere in this exploding horde of greed
are individuals following reason
Given  incentive they will set a course
For following generations to correct
This destructive multiplication 
In the billions of  eyes out there
a pair will open
It may already be too late

An eye opener to face the day with
Sip slowly
Un rhyming ill timed verses
Dubious Odes to Progress 
Are not  to be taken lightly

Details | I do not know? | |

Me myself and I

   I've got me myself and I and there ain't no denying that when it comes to me I will 
never lie to myself. I will never make fun of my flaws and I will never spread rumors on 
myself because I know that I would never disappoint myself all I have is me myself and I. 
When I close my eyes at night I can hug myself because I don't need anyone else but me 
and family to make myself happy. I will never deceive myself, I will never flat leave 
myself. I would never deliberately hurt myself or pretend that I was being real to myself 
when I wasn't. I can always know that when I criticize myself that I am being true to my 
soul, body and mind. In the end all I have is me to strive for my goals and not let 
anyone get in the way of it. All I need is me myself and I, I don't need anyone else's 
harsh words to make me cry. I will have my own inside jokes that only I know. As I turned 
around and saw a girl staring back at me, She was everything I was looking for in a best 
friend. She had all the same interests and all the same styles, she understood me and 
never made fun of me and when I realized that it was me looking in the mirror a tear 
swept down my eye.

Details | I do not know? | |


Henry Tudor was her suitor
And, anon, the two were wed.
But when she found another cuter,
Anne Boleyn just lost her head.

Details | I do not know? | |

University Days (2005)

Lonely days at first
And then I burst
An emergence of a leader
A people picker and a brain feeder
Days when troubles were low
We just went with the flow
A big stretch to your mind and heart
A new life a new start
Great days every single one
Now those days have gone
I look back and think 
Those days just go in a blink

Details | I do not know? | |

What's real

   Here I am sitting waiting for a prince charming that is hardly galloping, I must watch 
too many fantasies, I must read too many romances because in the real world nothing is 
like you want it to be. Everything is forced. Your pressured to find someone quick, 
That's not what love means to me. I see everyone falling in love and I wonder about 
myself. What's a girl like me doing alone? Maybe it's because my head is in too many 
clouds to breath. Even when a guy tries to approach me I knock him off his pedestal. I am 
perhaps just a little too mighty and yes I guess I have an ego on me but that's doesn't 
mean i'm not approachable. I will weaken to my knees when the right guy comes along. 
Tears drop down my face as I dream about the one I loved. So far away from me now that I 
can't feel him so I just let him go. Now i'm searching for someone just like him, Isn't 
it funny how the heart can be retarded. Your head is telling you no just forget it and 
your heart is beating messing things up causing you to lose it. But these feelings are 
real, my heart craving attention so much that I have no choice but to believe in silly 
romances. I have yet to feel that heart beating moment that makes my eyes water. But 
that's real and not a fairytale and as I close my eyes I know he's out there.

Details | Lyric | |


it's still a mystery
unsolved-thats me
triplethreat-thats me
no one cant compete
knockin down doors
you bowin down to my feet
im not gon stop
and i dare u hattas knock me
cause when i fall
you'll be still be lookin up to me