These Anniversary Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Anniversary. These are the best examples of Anniversary Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
my wife left without a word-
to buy a cheese cake!
In late October the reddest moon didn't change its phase,
it remained in the same spot to watch the witches' ballet;
the loud music matched the mood of the mystical night: tambourines
and flutes frantically played; sneers, jeers, giggles of the ugliest witches
mixed with the goblins' roars while they danced around a huge, hot fire.
I smelled a foul odor, the wild dogs feasted on a bloody oar,
" Leave some for us, or we'll turn you into bats! "
the hunched witch snarled with menacing eyes,
but they roared and threatened her with sharp teeth,
then Olga began to speak Latin words to cast
a spell on them and before it worked, they fled.
Glad that they had left, she dragged the dead animal
and hung it on a long rod to roast on the sparking fire;
hungry witches continued to dance with forks and knives
in their hands, anxiously waiting for their Halloween treat.
Written by Andrew Crisci
for Russel Sivey's contest,
" The Ultimate Halloween Contest "
It’s My Birthday
It’s my birthday… I look out the window there is no one for me owe so, owe so lonely poor me .
It’s my birthday… you surprise me, with a Barber-Q grill with a cooler that chills with a grin we show white grills.
Happy Birthday… it’s my Birthday I am still waiting, it is almost the end of my the day, just waiting on you to wish me a happy birthday which, well make my day.
It’s my birthday…you do not remember that day, can we go out for we can remember that day?
It’s my birthday… I can share it or alone, some share it with a twin, or with a friend and the ones who stay to the ends like a good friend.
It my birthday… its looks like another day to me I just need someone or something to comfort with me a room full of women and with hand full men, a juice in cup, juice in glass, with a sweet lady and grill on cut grass that may make every day feel like my birthday, with a touch of class.
It’s your birthday… it’s your birthday you should all-ways win on your birthday, if do not have a mate you sneak and go on second party date form those who may player hate.
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday! it comes and go, I see you come through, looking out my window with a hand full company that is what a party really should need, yes it’s sweet, sweet with music and sweet with treats or it must be the money, or food, or brinks, or just me.
Poetry 7/7/12 by author Keith K. Relf
Our love is like Gilligan's Island
but what we have is so much more
And to all the girls that I've loved before
they are but Brady Bunches on three hour tours
Cheers to the ladies on that Island
but you're my "Mary-Ann" and my "Movie Star"
come take my hand-in-hand, with candy tan
you're the best of both worlds, but much better by far
I have "Profess"ed to be your "Skipper"
tho' I'm "Thurston" for you like I do Mrs. Howell,
when you "Lovey" dove me with coconuts,
I can't help but go nuts, NOW GET ME A TOWEL!~~
CLASSIC TELEVISION SHOW= Gilligan's Island
*Note: this Rhyme was written as a love letter-ish type of thang:) I hope ya' don't mind the weirdness of it all~:)JSL
I hope you slept well. I hope you slept tight
I hope the creepy crawlies didn't come in the night
Did you open your eyes? Did you take in the sight
Of a hovering figure, pale and white?
Did you feel the cold breath? Did you feel the sharp bite?
Did the moaning and screaming give you a fright?
Did you show all your fear? Did you hide in the light?
As your wide eyes and shivering make them excite.
Did you hear from outdoors, victims’ helpless calls?
Did you hear your name echo outside in the halls?
Did you feel the cold slime 'drip - drip' on your head?
Did you notice the finger tips crawl round your bed?
Were there hand prints and puddles the colour of red?
Were there blood trails of foot prints from the undead?
If you woke up and saw none of what I just said
I'm sure they'll return to your dreams instead
That night may be over but there'll be many more
The undead do not rest; it's what they live for
They thrive on the hunt with a dribbling jaw
So keep your ears open for that creak of your door
Watch for the long fingers that be unforeseen
That creep round the corner, all scaly and green
I'm just happy I lived to tell the tales I've seen
I just hope you all had a Happy Halloween.
Put on a new dress, was looking really hot,
Dyed my hair with several blonde highlights,
Applied my MAC makeup... ooh-la-la,
I’m singing Al Greene, “So In Love With You”
Its our wedding anniversary, 29th and you knew
Bubbles overflow from the champagne bottle
You beckon me to come hither into our room
Which shoes to wear... oh you burst my bubble!
Written by Lee Ramage
September 8, 2011
Sponsor Debbie Guzzi
I find it disgusting the way that you snore
That snort when you laugh I truly abhor
So tired of you burping up food after lunch
When you nag I get fever and chilly goose-bumps
I HATE that you gossip, it's a shameful disgrace
(I'm scared of that mole on the side of your face)
You took all my money and now I'm flat broke
and the way that you dress? Good LORD what a joke!
So I'm kicking you out! Go pack up your stuff!
(If this is a nightmare, PLEASE wake me up)
Sometimes I stay up just to watch as you sleep
The way that you laugh sweeps me clean off my feet
Love those cute little hiccups after you dine
and your kind suggestions keep my ego in line
You listen politely when someone else speaks
(I ADORE that beauty mark there on your cheek)
The investments you made were wise and worthwhile
and your unique outfits show a grand sense of style
If you ever leave me, I'll kick and I'll scream
What else can I say? You're this old boy's dream
For Vienna's 'Let me have it then kiss my petunia' contest
Close your windows; draw the blinds as day turns into night
Shut your door and wrap up warm with a bedside table light
Close your eyes and try to sleep but also stay aware
As what may happen in the night could seem like a nightmare
You'll start to hear the sounds of souls, moaning cries and screams
You sneak a peek around yourself but nothing is as it seems
From the ceiling drip by drip and down the walls it flows
Pools of blood soaked in the rug to ooze between your toes
Ghastly ghouls and grimacing ghosts trapped within their doom
Creep and crawl under your bed and float around your room
They'll slide over your covers and slither in-between
As they wriggle to whisper in your ear...
Have a happy Hallowe'en!!!
After tossing back too many shots,
My tummy got tied up in knots.
But the outhouse fell down,
now a king with no crown,
I cover up where I must: "Thank You Scotts'!"
I think I've seen you in my dreams, you're matching every description.
Your love is like a drug, I'd kill to fill the prescription.
You give me so much excitement, like when babies are born.
You're the only flower I see that's in this garden of thorns.
You must be Jamaican, because you're Jamaican me crazy.
Let's get a place together and maybe raise up a baby.
A lot of people call me Trav, but you can call me tonight.
You have the most beautiful eyes in the world, just like the stars they shine bright.
If I told you that you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
You could make a shy guy try and make a blind man see.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
You've got me floating like a feather, and I want to feel this way forever.
You may think these are just lines, or maybe all the above,
but please read this with your heart, because you're the woman I love.