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Funny Angel Poems | Funny Poems About Angel

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Details | Prose Poetry | |

She read me Dr Seuss

6:35 A.M.

Sunrise against my neck
that no cheap tan booth could ever match.

I ring the doorbell in anticipation of joy’s injection.

I needed it.

Because I left my cell phone in the car,
as I didn’t want to hear any chimed email
or text annoyances.

And the car just got cleaned,
only for the birds to have their way
on its waxy shine.

Bastards!

Time to grab the flamethrower from my trunk!

But, before I could scream in Braveheart declaration,
there she was.

Her 6 yr old smile,
made of 1/4 inch gaps between innocence enamel,
captured me like no other could.

“Tio”, she preached in angelica sonata.

As she held me,
held me,
with puppy love warmth.

Even the rainbows fell to its knees.

She took off my jacket with ferret-like perkiness and
asked me to sit on the floor with her.

But, not before offering to toast me some Eggo waffles
with a big glass of Ovaltine…
…in her Little Mermaid glass,
proudly made in North Korea.

It even had the dictator’s initials and a bucktooth smiley face stamp, signed in glitter
that said:
“Kid-safe”.

Thank God I just took my online course in Child Safety.
I was ready!

As I sip on Little Mermaid’s curves,
shaped in plastic, swirly straw weirdness,
a sound blasts off from a Barbie radio.

My 2 yr old angel galloped into this heart of mine,
with Tinnitus piercing scream & laughter,
tackling me in Incredible Hulk lunge.

“Hi Tio”, she whispered, before she hopped back upstairs, 
Ninja Turtle-style,
laughing maniacally with rapid head tilts, left to right to left.

Boys will fear her. 
And I couldn’t be more proud.

After two moments of silence, 
my 6 yr old angel places her Dr. Seuss book on my lap,
as she sits in front of me.

“I can r-r-read
with my eye-s
shut.”

She carefully completed the sentence,
as my eyes instantly fill with leaky pride
and an ingrained smile.

10 minutes later, she shut her book and asked me how she did.
“I am so proud of you my angel.”
“You have come so far.”

I had to hold back tears because I didn’t want to throw her off.
Yet I think she knew,
because she kept her head down and smiled with gentle starburst.

Mission accomplished.

And it was then where I heard her say,
“Those who matter don’t mind,
those who mind don’t matter.”

But she was quiet, looking at me with tilted head & smile.

For it was my inner child, 
speaking
clear.

© Drake J. Eszes


Details | Rhyme | |

Soul Of An Angel, Life Of A Moonshiner

He served as a deacon in his church and was as pious as they come.
(But on the side, he sold whiskey from a thirty-gallon drum!)
He taught the junior high Sunday school class and was a Bible scholar.
(But on the side, he 'stilled moonshine way back up in the holler!)

He was faithful in tithing ten percent of his ill-gotten gain.
(For his John Barleycorn he used only the best obtainable grain!)
He occupied the same pew every Sunday listening with attentive ear.
(It was rumored about that he also brewed some very potent beer!)

He proffered an "amen" at appropriate times and wore a suit and tie.
(He was renowned throughout the county for his very delectable rye!)
His tenor voice blended well when singing, "I Love Thy Kingdom, Lord."
(On back roads he did a bit of bootlegging in his hopped-up V-8 Ford!)

He was the first to offer succor to widows, orphans and others left bereft.
(He'd run his still for years - at evading "revenooers" he was very deft!)
When folks were needed to serve on committees he was first to volunteer.
(When asked his occupation he replied, "I'm a 'Spirit'ual Engineer!")

At Yuletide he was generous with the preacher giving him a beef, cash and pork.
(At the annual church picnic he surreptitiously passed a bottle to uncork!)
There couldn't be found a finer saint in all of Boondock County, Kentucky.
(He'll continue to "minister" to parched throats thereabouts - if he's lucky!)

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)

Won First Place in the April 2011 Soup International Contest - September 2011
First Place in Paula Swanson's "Fill In The Blanks" Contest - June 2010


Details | Verse | |

Ding Dong The Wicked Witch is Dead

Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.

Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.

Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.

Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.


Details | Free verse | |

Princesses

Pretty princesses
Dancing all around
Frolicking through fields
Very beautiful
Just like you!


Details | ABC | |

Skin

You send bolts through my skin 
something I was never to 
accomplish with you, when I 
saw you it's like my heart sank 
to my stomach and I was in 
shock my body still my body 
heavy felt like when I moved I 
was about to fall to my knees 
you make me want to get 
inside my brain pick you up and 
take you out pick you one by 
one like a flower because I do 
love you and love you not.


Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?


Details | Dodoitsu | |

Cross Dressing

The devil wears a blue dress.
An angel wears a red dress.
Cross dressing has gone mainstream.
What color is yours?


Details | Ballade | |

An Ellice Island - In search of KindRed Soul

Long miles of tedious journey,
Missing my darling honey.
Travelling impatiently, spend thousands of 
money, 
Hope god will bless me with ma lucky soul 
at this season.

Equatorial island exploring its amazed 
beauty, glittering with immersed grasses.
Wrapped by queens necklaced small lake 
aside, at the outskirts of dalhousie.
My heart dwelled into its god gifted 
creativity,
When the night lime lighted,
Millions of stars scattered around 
charming moon.
As if its was a wondering boon.
Lucky enough for landing with my next 
hop.

Eagerly waiting for my heart chaser,
Girl passed near by, few seconds later.
Flaming beauty mould my soul.
Topped with innocence, ready for my 
auspicious goal.
Her chic appearance,
Her innocent appeal.
Strucking heart raised with high beats..
Awaited for our romantic date in ma 
upcoming meet.

Frequency of our nature matched.
Stolen Eyes of each other were catched.
Strings of our heart whistled 
synchronously.
Everything had happened miraclelously.
I rebelled the three precious words of 
romantic dictionary.
Accepting my red rose, She blushed.

At event of recreation, campfire were 
ignited.
Nobody around us, private moments 
between we two spotlighted.
Playing guitar, she sinked with every beat,
That's the coincidence our eyes again 
meet.
Hand in hand danced with the soothing 
romantic theme,
Sparkling smile on her face beamed.
Getting closer to her, because of her 
fragranced cream.
Expecting the light around us to be dim.

The romantic moment again came,
Flaps of my soul opened for the grand 
dame.
She looked too pretty in her gold lame 
dress, 
My heart awarded her an order of chivalry.
Don't know who are you, but baby you are 
the one, I am in love.
You live in me, You are my love
I feel you in my heart,
You are my world, I just cant stay apart!

Please don't hesitate, please don't lie,
Whatever you feel, my heart can buy!
Angel of life, Its just you.
Completeness in life can't be without you.

Wanna Carry journey happily together.
Tickling nose, Queenly beauty of my white 
leather.
Hold my senses, its caught by you.
Don't let be just memories, wanna feel 
ecstasy of love towards you forever.
Promising to hold your hand throughout 
life in this lovely weather.

Will be your shadow, because your pain 
will be mine.
Its destiny that our heart clicked a 
snapshot of each other's soul.
Stopping by my question, Will you marry 
me, my Kindred Soul?


Details | Carpe Diem | |

I

If its money I got its money ill keep. If its money I have its money ill weep. If its love that I give its love ill receive. For I am but no one who just see's beneath. Some say your only as strong as you feel, but how could we change..in a place that's so unreal. People are hearing but..not really hearing. Why is the world so blind. I keep on screaming and screaming and screaming for things to be revolutionized. I am just a small song in a world full of cries, laughter, tears and french-fries.


Details | Limerick | |

Hark--an Angel--The harbinger of all things good

What flies though the air up above
Disguised as a peace seeking dove
For those who've not heard
Drones can send you the bird
From the land of brotherly love

Author's note: Is this really how to win friends and influence people (for the long term)?


Details | Verse | |

Single Kisses

Focused on you, a wild demons stare
 With a motion it happens
 A emotion flattens
 As you fall beneath a demons glare
 
He notices most things that happen
 Might even pick the clothes you wear
 Believe it or not he really does care
 Knows whats best and helps me get there
 
To perfection the performance blacken when he's scared
 Things fall apart if he's not helping me be prepaired
 Guidence and experience for me his mare
 Sometimes I wonder what it would be like without a demon here
 
He loves positive reactions with greatness and flair
 And how people love me after he dares
 Carefully he holds me through a very small tear
 Me I guess I am getting used to, just hangin round rare 


Details | Free verse | |

with slight dementia

old man
retiring
with slight dementia
horny 
with sturdy sled
and little to offer

looking for attractive
young female and/or male
with good body
compassionate
needing little
season greeting

send photo 
off season
between
January and October
to Santa Claus
Saint Barts


Details | Ballad | |

The Human,The Demon, And The Angel

The Human,The Demon, And The Angel

I'm the one who must stay
I'm the one who must kill you
I'm the one who must reverse time

I am to die when the new moon is in range
I am the one to be your executioner your taker of life
I am to observer and to take note of everything and of every life


Who are you to say I have no future
I say what I please for I am the bringer of death
I want to help I wish to free you I need to save you

There is no more time for my life 
You never had a life to begin with
She was free until you stole her very being

I am the human who must die
I am the demon who only wants her body for it kill
I am the angel who will take her soul once her body is gone

We are in one body
We are in one mind
We are three trapped by one bond

These times are different then the last 
These times are different then when I was young
These times are different then when the earth was made

Oh how we let this control us
Oh how we take our worlds and live for such granted
Oh how we let who we are put fear in our hearts


I leave this to you
I leave this to you
I leave this to you

We have exceed 
We have flown 
We have drowned
We have died
We have lived
We have made many wonders
We have created a new life
We have done evil deeds
We have done good deeds
We have but to wait for the one day
We have but to wait for our freedom
We have each other 
We have nothing but that
We have nothing but each other and to wait 
We have to wait for freedom


Details | Free verse | |

Subconscious On My Mind

She visits in my dreams,
A place that I love to go,
For when my body is sleeping;
My subconscious starts to show.

She is not the same as when I’m awake,
She is fierce and unafraid; 
She watches over the pillows,
Where my head is soundly laid. 

She has wings just like an Angel,
Only hers are made of light;
With brilliant rainbow hues,
Enough to shine throughout the night. 

To me she looks much older,
Maybe even wise; 
One look at me and I know,
She can see right through my lies.

For her and I are one,
No hiding from the truth;
She understands that I’m growing,
Developing from my youth. 

She never passes judgment,
For herself would be included;
Her thoughts are always brilliant;
And never convoluted.  
I’m referring to my soul;
Aged throughout my lives.
She gives my words their meanings;
And my body is what she drives.

Inspiring my movements,
And wiping all of my tears;
Her voice is mine but rings through,
My head and out my ears. 

Perhaps it’s her who is writing this,
Giving me the rhyme;
My subconscious and my consciousness;
Working together for all of time. 

Although most won’t understand this,
That it is about a different part of me,
Tonight under the full-moon;
I’m setting my spirit free.

Allowed to dance in the stars,
And run across the sky;
Only to return to our body,
Suppressing her urge to fly. 


Details | Blank verse | |

Pages of the Book

On earth on a Mission
purpose redefined with singleness of vision
clarity came cause i sat to look
through the pages of the book


Some days skipped with nothing to dine
some nights slept with nothing to wine
yet more nourished than a royal cook
for i am best fed from the pages of the book


When I lost focus and fell
drowning in the depths of the well
yet I was lifted by an unseen hook
as i flipped through the pages of the book


What about you my dear friend
when the terrestrial race comes to an end
and death vomits all that it ever took
will your name be found on the pages of the book


Details | Haiku | |

patience #30 angel card

not a natural 
has to be thought out and planned
who has time for that!?!?!?


Details | Personification | |

A Snowflake In June

I thought I saw a snowflake in June
Perhaps, it was just silly daydream imaginations
Or were ongoing investigations really do

Upon further horizon inquiries
The sun ended interviews in blushing denial
And when heavenly interrogations finished
The sky was turning guilty blue

I’m absolutely sure
The clouds were somewhere amidst the cover up
Fortunately, a little pigeon squawked
And revealed something of the simple truth

That, there was a brewing
Conspiracy of rumors, flying 
So I ruffled stoolie feathers convincingly
To spill the beans, out with his scandalous news

It seems a wintry prima donna 
Performer of the coming season
In order to beat the ratings
Broke out early and was somewhere on the loose

Could it be
The very same stitch of ice I'd seen
A snowflake thespian
Acting out in the month of June

Then, I saw a glistening 
Of arrogance pass right before my eyes
And tiny banner waved
Followed by the squeaky words “see you very soon”

I rubbed my eyes in disbelief 
And then, my tongue was quickly unleashed
As I closed the case of any further flakes
From trying to make their premature Hollywood debuts


Details | Limerick | |

Angel singing

Is it an angel that I hear singing?
Or is it tinnitus in my ears ringing?
The voice is so high
Its making me cry
It’s my underwear, it's tight and wringing 


Details | Verse | |

Wings of Desire

Last night's Wim Wenders film Wings of Desire, not starring Adam
      Sandler,
great in the great tradition of Metropolis, Fellini, Children of Paradise,
      Ikiru, Open City.
This is not comedy though it can be funny overhearing people thinking,

the randomness of thought, data dots, circles with dots, sadness and
      silliness,
silly sadness, confusion, rarely a clear thought, not one logical
lucid progression. Deep art.

I'd like to do better than my best so far, write something with
      hydroxyapatite
that won't gather dust then become dust a neuron of
sweetness, an early morning bicyclist, a lost ghost or fallen angel

any form from which death might abstain or forego appetite.
Appearing to meander from subject to subject is my practice. Looking
      for solutions to the equations. Learning the changes then forgetting
      them.
The expressions emanating from mortal minds are broken stamens, sticky
      stigmas.

Striving for immortality,
some Spanish philosopher (who looks like Don Quixote)
says he understands and it's alright.

I will read what he wrote and probably agree
but is he immortal? Not his body, but his thoughts.
True, I say, but this also: Not his mind, but his thoughts. Unchanging and
      finite. Put them in a hatbox and pass them on as heirlooms.

To overhear the secret thoughts of others. Sharing and unsharing
      electrons, disrobing
and bathing. That is the purpose of poetry. Gargoyle twice. Did Wim
give each thought its own voice or use the same voice for all thoughts,
      every whim.






Details | Free verse | |

The Olde Shoppe Bell

I hear the bell like ex-wives voices nagging
Hanging,beneath the olde shoppe door ringing
When someone enters through
They have and I do 
A swift little dance and a more ridiculous jig
To that stupid and silly sounding thing

Every time I hear it, it echoes in my head 
As if far fetched fantasies 
An ominous figure the tiny brass is introducing
In the black trench coat to appear instead
Along with hat that eclipses his face
There he'll be, standing 
Eyeing all from beyond his place

Patrons inside slow turn in sync trembling in fear
As if death were choosing its next victim "right here"
It wouldn't be long before I could no longer hold on
From hysterics and laughter outward and in directions forthwith 

Toward the harbinger announcments of cruel intentions 
As the next candidate bound on hell train's transportion
And beneath the door prodding sounds once more
That stupid bell again starts ringing
And I'd think to myself " surely no angel has gotten their wings"
So under my breath laughing, then jump heel clicking, dancing a more ridiculous jig


Details | I do not know? | |

She stopped me, and I did refuse

It was euphoria that wouldn't break

It was encouragement that didn't shake

A disastrous example of why I'm still awake

It was you baby,
You swimming in the lake

I wanted your fucking babies, 
But your head was listening to my break


I know I don't know how to stop dancing

Just like you can do things that make me seem romantic

Just like I never show my face to an animal who told me I shouldn't chance it

Just like drum and base and you on top is utterly enchantin'

I'd live forever just to see you come off of your clamor

I'd eat an entire steak house to show you how to dam it


Details | Rhyme | |

Devil or Angel

                                      
She was an angel sent from heaven; or a demon straight from hell;
She was everything that I should learn, so in heaven I’d do well.
She made me laugh about myself, as I practiced ringing bells;
But somehow she expected that, and everyone she’d tell.
She said I was contagious, she was a lotion for a rash;
But then she stepped all over me, as if I were some trash.

We tussled at the pits of hell, we huddled in the clouds;
We told ourselves that it was love, but we hid beneath a shroud  
Walking down the avenue; it’s obvious I was proud;
Yet often I would notice her, looking to the crowd.
She was everything I needed but she was nothing that I want;
I think she’s out there on a broom; on a witches haunt.


Details | Rhyme | |

meant to be

I have yet to meet you we’ve only spoken on line
Yet I have a vision of you, you were meant to be mine.
I saw your face this morning within the clouds above.
It filled me with the warmest sensation I’m thinking it was love.
I’ve never felt this warmth before, I don’t know what to say
I have yet to meet you, I guess that’s why it’s strange. 
So I analyzed the situation as I took a look around.
After extensive observation this is what I found
I have a vision of what I want in a love that’s all my own.
One that will sit in a rocking chair in the house that we call home.
A woman so tender and easy to love
It must have hurt when she fell from above.
A woman who loves with the heart of a child
One that is loving, strong but mild.
An intelligent woman who’s interest abound
From politics to puppies, she what I call well round.
Her nature is so gentile,  yet can be firm at times
She’s positively strong headed truly a unique find.
Her eyes a beautiful hazel and sometimes emerald green
It depends on what mood she’s in, if you know what I mean.
A woman who is tender and her countenance is aglow.
She dreams the dreams of children, with love that over flows. 
A woman who knows what she wants out of life
The courage to get it and the strength to fight.
Live and let live is how she was grown
Makes the best of what she calls home.
A full grown woman with childlike ways
Childhood memories that will never fade.
A woman if need be, is willing to change
One who loves me and will never stray.
The beauty of her heart just sets me on fire
For her heart beats for me, I’m her only desire.
She doesn’t ask for much out of life
Just be loving  and faithful and be a good wife.
I desired  a woman that I can have for the longest of time.
I’ll never take for granted the fact that she is mine.
We finally met in 2006
I remember that feeling when we had our first kiss
We’ve been together for 7 years now
I don’t know how I’ve done it, but you are still around
I want you to know I love you with every beat of my heart
A love that has been there from the very start.
I want you to know that you’re more than I could vision
Having you here with me was one of our best decisions. 


Details | Tail-rhyme | |

Toothless Angel, Mary Grace

Mystifying, magical melody
      your first laughter is to me;
As blissful and as joyful as bliss
      and joy can ever be;
Really you're much too young
      to even smile, my dear;
Your lilting giggles, such
      soothing music to my ear.

Gleefully you pinch my nose,
      grab my hair, you little rose;
Readily you enchant me with
      that toothless angel's smile;
And you bounce mirthfully
     up and down my tummy;
Clapping small hands, innocent
     eyes that let me see;
Eyes that mirror love for life,
     for you from mom and me.


Details | Burlesque | |

reality

i breathe and breathe out
each second unravels
as i open my eyes 
and see three stars just above me
an angel flies above me 
playing his harp
(i think it's broken
cuz i hear nothing from above)

in front of me
Elvis plays his guitar-
or whatever that is in his hands-
i think it's worn out
cuz it sounds like
there is a bee humming around me
now,
how annoying can that get?

suddenly, mom comes before me
yelling with all her might
"you forgot to wash the dishes, Dan!!!"

now, Elvis has hightailed
who wouldn't?
even the angel with the broken harp
has flown away

so i return from the dead
to wash the dishes
 
how more unfair
life can get?
i can't even
rest in peace!!!


Details | I do not know? | |

Ooops, Six Spooks In A Coup, De Grace

Embolden they, marching hand in hand a unison
Determined to bring down his child; Nero, Pharaoh and her
Sparrow trailed closely by their three little pigs ? Baby playing amid love's
Innocent crib unaware these, daemonicia noses pressed unto destiny's forte glass ?
Licking time's panes premogenitor's werewolves her full moon: crimson, begins it's howl
Hunch'back hallways imploding doors splintered eyes the battle cry ~ Charge.... 
                                                                                         ....Bobby, juggling his infant giggling.


Details | Lyric | |

Lady Femme fatale

I left, and crept to my room
And slept
I Wept
And Kept you in the haven of my soul like a pet.
Femme fatale
I will tell your tale
Till you sell me your soul.
You are so beautiful
So wicked
So charming.

Fickle you!
I adore your momentarily sweetness
And each and every slap on my numb cheek.

I know, deep down the unseen crevice of your heart,
Your love for me is powerful than Viagra
You are a beautiful nightmare,
So wicked
So charming
That everyone wants to see in their dreams.


Details | Free verse | |

Hardcore satanists

world wars your mongering for
the big satanic bloodbath
more appealing to god
then two homosexual men
The devil may cry
my favorite angel facing a feat of unequal measure
since you know soo much about him
live it everyday
you never let him live this down
just work on making yourselves miserable
you look soo happy that way
words you read by the best
your own walking contradiction
so caught up in getting what you want at anycost
you forgot what he wanted
and there is a price to pay
signed yourself up for a fight that isnt yours
the rules you live by
they are enforced
you cant scramble away from this fast enough
the lie you live for power
lesser of two evils presented to you
path of least resistance corners you again
sing yourself to suicide ever soo sweetly
the shortest straw has no alibi
and i think its funny
Jesus has some truth to tell him
slip the witch a missing letter
she doesnt mind bringin him back to life
even the devil you know
splattered all over your pages
the philosophy you seem to live everyday
offered you a short term power
and we just throw you away
came to get my favorite angel
something youve been denying yourself the whole time
trivial pursuit of endless lies manipulating yourselves this way is such a shame
now i'm not obligated to help you
you had a choice
the game of life you signed up for is coming round again
faster than you think
your underground rivalry of seeking after power
i paid the devil to see if you would make this mistake
then you did and i agreed he could do the dirty work in jesus name
the truth will get you in karmic laws you forgot about
threefolds of being humbled
and humbled and humbled again
wont even help you, you cant get away
hardcore satanists dressed up as saints messing up their own destiny
did the world not tell you
life is a test?
you were tested
you failed
the devil was in on it
enjoy your bloodbaths of endless wars in hell
the world kept this under rug swept
and now for you there is no way out
paid the devil for me
and jesus will eventualy set him free from the you he doesnt want
your not fathoming this properly
jesus was tortured so you wouldnt be
the letter gone missing
now whose got a face to blame
hardcore satanists
my favorite angel loves me
he wouldnt allow me to live this nightmare
so hes taking you far far away


Details | Rhyme | |

She is

She sounds like an angel when she sings
She looks like one but with invisible wings
She is perfect, I cannot find any mistakes
She’s always willing to give and seldom she takes
She is the girl meant to be
She’s the one I want to marry me

She’s been married to me now for ten years
She’s the one that caused me to go deaf in the ears
She was cast down from heaven
She torments me and the town of Devon
She is the girl meant to be
She’s the one I beg to divorce me

She’s an angel sure from heaven
She has a number 666 not seven
She’s my wife
She my trouble she’s my strife


Details | Epitaph | |

Willow

Here lies my old pal Michael,
His spirit set free by wind,
because the storm which kicked his bucket,
trapped the poor old git within,
A Scotsman by his name,
and a carpenter by trade,
should of built yourself s door mate,
to stop the barn which caved you in.

I love you Bic.