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Free Verse Health Poems | Free Verse Poems About Health

These Free Verse Health poems are examples of Free Verse poems about Health. These are the best examples of Free Verse Health poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

Waiting for the Lost

Wait for me when I get back,
just wait for me…

I rub my weary eyes, as I write this
hoping you’ll understand,
hoping you’ll take our memories with you
as we travel on different roads
until that day comes
when I find that path
that leads me back to you…

I was forced on this journey, and so were you.
Neither of us wanted this, but maybe this is what we need.

Now I truly am lost, and my eyes wander off…
Everything’s a blur now,  and I grasp at cotton candy clouds
sugar crystals sticking on my warm fingers, and that is all.






01072012103a106


Details | Free verse | |

Home Of My Spirit

Like lone wolves in the night
              you and I….
that through the darkness
we still hunger for justice 
and for truth in all things

We want harmony 
              and enlightenment
To find ourselves
at peace…..as one within….

         Anahata 

Capture the green 
Feel it swirl and beckon
Verdant and healing
Complete forgiveness
Absolution from the guilt
and from the memories

Release and breathe 
          Let it flow……

Yes, you and I are connected
Through the regret and remorse 
We search and we find light

On a path to illumination
for teaching and learning
and understanding

Love……pure and true

        VENUS 

Acceptance of self 
results in balance 
                 and expansion  
Being at one with Gaia
       (and her precious gifts)

Achieving planetary consciousness

Us…..we have found
true ability to connect
to the soul of another

         Anahata

True augmentation of self

A home in the higher dimensions
A place that is safe to sleep

Let us dance, my love
My lone wolf…
Let us connect through spirit
(We have shed the black)
Through touch
                  and heart

Be mine in all things
Forever and always

You are my HEART


Details | Free verse | |

Heart Shaped Balloon

I gave you a balloon,
It held my life inside.

Within a shiny rubber tube
components of my soul aligned,
a sign,
I became something new
for you...

Memories
Feelings
Ideas

Each speck
a tickle upon my breath,
a tiny bubble
of nuanced personality;

The strengths of me debrided
the secrets of my lungs,
pink and untold
for you to confide,
ease trouble
in eyes before me.

Yet
were you astute?
Could your mind compute
the depth 
of the beautiful find
floating before you?

You bent,
my unique particles ended
their show of strength
broken in length;

You twisted,
crushed and divided
my dreams subsided...

Molded to an unrecognizable form,
I became your norm.

Though you never knew,
my secret hope to survive
my own gift
thrive and lift,
lay within you.

Your grip thirsted control so long,
the pieces of me left burst
to skitter away in song
among soaring clouds,
leaving shrouds of pain
grounded and gone...

Flying far from the land
one beautiful day,
away 
from you
and the broken balloon that laid
in your hand.



Details | Free verse | |

Nurse Anne

            Nurse Anne

Snow steeped in mountains and mountains steeped in snow
Evergreens and pine trees hold the earth with purpose
Nurse Anne steps into hospital from brutal winter cold
Measures stethoscopes and takes gentle pulses
Takes care of bullet wounds and children on her rounds
Wears white, green or blue uniforms or gowns while working
That’s pure speculation as you know
Nurse Anne is not a lawyer according to close sources
She writes poetry on line, refines them in her leisure time
Her prescription for good health and life is simple
Eat vegetables, fishes and less meat
Most importantly, Breath, (it helps a lot) 
Take moderation in everything
Get plenty of rest and sleep
And if you can’t be intelligent or stay on your toes
At least stay on your feet
Naturally a life spent vertically is not advised
Nurse Anne wants us all to exercise 
She will help you to get by and back to skiing
With her good guidance and by being wise
She does her noble work then travels home
Returns to evening
To writing poems at her own leisure


Details | Free verse | |

The Royal Curse

It afflicts king and queen alike.
Brought to the castle 
by the master of infildelity.
He moves smoothly from one to the other.
He swiftly takes them 
as is his right, he believes.
Only to have his fill
from the fair maiden 
to the sullied trollop.
He sees them all equally
in his adventures.
He spreads his curse
from one to the other.
It robs it's victims
of their eyes and senses.
Over the years, it slowly degrades
their intelligence and lives.
It can bring down the greatest Empires
if given enough time.


Details | Free verse | |

How I Danced!

The night is cold, awaiting the early light of dawn
My body shivers, my feet like ice, I long for sleep but it does not come 
Like so many lonely hours in the darkness
The ache of my bones so cruel and relentless

Tears on my pillow, I once again slip from the warm covers
Leaving the placid breath beside me, never knowing I’ve gone
I would give so much to have the peace of slumber
The chance to dream of an earlier life, one that is gone now

Where I danced with the clouds on a warm spring day
Ran in the woods chasing butterflies or a humming bird 
The gentle breeze brushing against my skin
My soul free to be who I am, without the pain of this withering shell

Some nights I long for an end to this misery
Life has dealt such a difficult challenge
But more often, I sit in the dim light of the morning
Remembering my youth and the freedom that it gave

How I laughed in its face, knowing I would always be young
That I would always be ready to take on the world unencumbered
How naïve…and how unappreciative of the wonders of my youthful body
Pushing the limits of this fragile home to my soul, never fearing an end to my 
flight

But the dawn comes, and I bravely go on to face another day
Determined to make it the best possible
Although this life, even with it’s wicked edge, so unexpected
Arrived before I was ready to give up my wonderful dance of freedom

I rub my twisted joints, warming them near the fire
Knowing that, even through the pain there is hope
For my mind is sharp, my wit is clever 
And I may yet find joys in the brightness and warmth of this new sun

For I can still hear the birds sing their happy tunes
Watch the grandchildren’s innocent play, their melodic giggles of joy
And remember how it was not so long ago…
And how I danced! 


Details | Free verse | |

Minds lost are Minds Found

I’m losing my mind in a hurry!
Maybe, maybe, losing the mind is letting it find itself
or maybe, i'm just crazy

I keep running  with anticipation, with heart open and judgment closed
[I discover most superbly this way]
 Foolishly Dropping it, hoping that it’ll pick up something useful
On sidewalks, books, table-top salty discussions,
Sometimes in filth letting it pervade the crevices
And when I tidy it, sometimes
It doesn’t all come out, but I try my best
Ever so often, after a new dish soap and scrubbing gloves
 it comes out cleaner then it ever was, 
With spicy remains of the crude yet true substances

Chunks fall out where the glue of stability erodes 
                  I know that I am fond of it this way
So I can put them back together
                   With my own fingers


                                                     Organized C   H   A   O   S


Instead of the media’s, my peers, my parents, piloting
The pivotal pieces 
I let them descend tenderly into location
In my own decimal code
I constitute the regulations here
This belongs to me, my only
Safe place

It doesn’t matter to me if life doesn’t flow
If it’s jagged or slow, here
I don’t care
If insanity is the real sanity
Or that distinctive is incorrect
This is my society and I shape it as I please
Seeing as it only affects me
As long as my mind is 
In flurries of expansion
I don’t really care if it’s lost at all


Details | Free verse | |

Pink Pink Pink


Pink- Pink- Pink- Every peak has its own attractions, Like the mountains, The mounts of a woman, Have always remained, Her pride possessions. 01 It has the charms, More intoxicating than wine, As it reveals the beauty, Of a woman's alluring binds. 02 These mounts gives, The wings of imagination and colors, In the mind of an artist, And they arise the passion, In lovers mind.03 Their rise and fall, Has shaken great empires, Under their cool and peaceful shade, The dreams of a child form shapes. 04 Its serenity has given birth, To most pious and holy figures on Earth, And their warmth have shaped the dreams, Of many powerful kingdoms on Earth.05 They feed life giving milk, To every new born light, Every time they laugh and cry, These lofty mounts, Help in forming shapes, When the child begins its story. 06 But these pride possessions, Of a woman, These lofty inspirations, Of Poets, Writers and Artists, These magical charms Which often become more attractive, Than the face of a woman, Are facing, A wide spread pollution,* Which is the unwanted gift of Modern living and They are also the gifts, Of worst living habits, Adopted by thousands, and millions of woman, As they fall prey, Before the charms, And shows of modern generation. 07 Many such wonderful women, Who are in the grip of this pollution,* Have brought this curse on them, Mostly because, Of their own follies and errors. 08 Many such suffering women, Can really get rid of, From the curse of this pollution,* If only they can show, The courage to adopt, The natural way, Of living and breathing, Possible under the boon like shade, Of real Yoga. 09 The reasons, Of the distortions,* Of their pink pink ribbons, Are mainly the results, Of their own creations, And these results, Are not something, For which, One should blame, The destiny or God every time. 10 Some of the serious reasons are, Not caring rightly, For one’s own pride possessions, And the lack of, Physical manipulations. Not keeping, A cool and calm mind, And eating, From morning till night, All the junk foods and wine. 11 And working, Beyond all time limits, While stressing, your peaceful mind. 12 Running and more running To catch others, So that you may not leg behind. 13 And madly crying, For more and more wealth, Even if you have sufficient, For your life time. 14 Are the reasons, Which invite the pollution,* To sow its rotten seeds, To spoil, The enchanting valley, Which exists, Amid the mounts of, Pink pink flowers. 15 The pollution,* Can still be derived out, With the little practice of Yoga, But it remains untouched, And unsung about, By most of the modern women. 16 These otherwise elegant women, Regularly face the problems, Of distress, Lack of peace, And sound sleep. Which ultimately take away, Their happiness, And coolness of mind, Resulting in strengthening more, The un sprouted seeds of pollution.* 17 Still it is not too late, If they can only change, Their life styles, Their eating and drinking habits, And adopt from today, The way of natural living, By adopting, The boon like Yoga. 18 As the practice of Yoga, Not only add years to your life, But life to your years, as well. 19 Ravindra Kanpur India 15th Nov. 2012 *Pollution- The other name of Cancer. Those who want to share their views on My above Poem may write to me on my yahoo mail id: kapoor_skk@yahoo.com I would welcome your brief comments and if possible I will reply you. Thanking you in anticipation. Ravindra K Kapoor Inspired by Poet Destroyer I am dedicating this Poem to all those women of the world, who are facing any such problem of Pollution* And to those also who are not facing it, so that their life my feel the joy of living under the blessings of Yoga. Ravindra
TO OVERCOME OR TO TAKE PRECAUTION ON THIS PROBLEM UP TO SOME EXTENT- ONE CAN START WITH ANY ONE OR TWO OR THREE OR ALL FIVE OF THE SIMPLE YOGA EXERCISES I HAVE GIVEN IN MY ‘YOGA IN POEM’ SERIES 1 TO 5 ON POETRY SOUP IT- SELF. YOUR COMMENTS WOULD BE HIGHLY APPRECIATED. http://www.poetrysoup.com/poems_poets/poem_detail.aspx?ID=490745 IMPORTANT NOTE: The best effects of Yoga can only be obtained if it includes the main exercises of essential ‘PRANAYAMA’ otherwise it wouldn’t yield the desired results and PRANYAM should be learn properly first. Ravindra K Kapoor


Details | Free verse | |

Worst Love Poem Ever Written

I suck at dying poems
Chemo poems, Metastatic Cancer poems,
Hair falling out in the shower poems
 
And I told a half truth
When I told you I could write you one
In less than six months (It's been eight)
I apologize for being so late

 
I wanted your poem to be pink and graceful
Like those ribbons
I see all over the internet
Filled with cheesy generic rhymes
That read like a Hallmark audition

  But already my metaphors are melting
And my similes are getting soft
 I guarantee you the rhyme meter will be off

 When I went to Google
And the typed in the word 'happy'
Three billion links came up

Not a single inference to
Breast cancer, hair loss
No redirects to mastectomies
Yahoo wasn't any kinder

 
The only thing research could teach me
Is that a good day on chemo
Is when your stool doesn't come out tar Black
And has no blood in it

Or when your urine
Smells better on Wednesday
Than it did on Tuesday

Sleeping less than 12 hours
When 24 would be better

  
America has more poets
Than it does alcoholics
   And Pot smokers combined
And you chose me to be
Your Breast Cancer
Poet Laureate

Trusting me to write a poem
About the biggest battle in your life

So I refuse to finish this poem
Without something bright and hopeful
 
And don't think
I didn't notice your Facebook activity
Had decreased by 88%
In the last three months

 
And you aren't really
Coming to any more of my poetry shows
Ever again. Are you??
But we still have March, April
Don't we?

 
But even if you had one breast
Or no breast

Or if you had less hair than I do
I promise to look only in your eyes
And never ever even notice
Or even think about it

And never for a moment
Would I feel sorry for you

Yes I suck at lying too...

 
But I don't suck at loving you
Or at hoping you wake up tomorrow morning
 With no Cancer at all
And that The Eiffel Tower will be right outside
Your bedroom window...

And I would be right there with you
Holding your hand while we look down on Paris
And you can impress me with your French again

 
And if I ever make it
To the Pulitzer Poetry board
I might lose a thousand points
Just for this poem alone

And my hopes for the prize will be smitten
And some old person 
With white hair will say
That was the worst love poem ever written


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Free verse | |

Senility

The rainbow of reason ends
With a pot of gold and jabberwocky.
When hippocampus dwells in solitary,
       silent,
              eerie,
                    forgotten dormitories
of the expatriated mind.


In planned visits 
To familiar spaces,
When elapsed faces are still hailed with fervor, 
         and hasty,		
                 eager,
                      vivid candor,
As though they had never gone.


Deep in thought
In cavernous bowels tangled lost, 
Remote repartees recurring restlessly. 
          Cautious,
                      wary,
  	                    and ever leery	
of echoing footsteps anxiously nearing, as though someone might overhear. 


As even eyes fail to mirror
The twilight of past vigor,
Speaking in feeble voices muddled beneath walls,
            beneath walls,
	           beneath walls,
	                     beneath walls.
Walking politely in ancient, and empty, imaginary halls.


The stars stop still and unfleeting
Listening to last breaths, and the heart’s last beating,
To hearken timid last words from the past's last illusions,
            past apparitions,
                         past veritas
                                   past delusions,
Where celestial alae still go a-flutter with lost aspirations.


When the frail hand that once held and sheltered
Cannot even rattle dandelion clocks,
Or crush delicate imago wings into dust,
          and caress, 
                  and feel,
                           and touch, 
Save for Elysian veldts
Where the rainbow of reason ends.



Details | Free verse | |

I Do Believe

"I Do Believe" 

The purpose of LIFE is to {Living In Faith Ever} 
to enrich God within us 
to an optimum level 
so that We as Humans 
can be guided by God 
to fuel out brothers and sisters 
with the same driving force 
to connect with the living God, 
to His existence and 
to See the Invisible, 
Believe the Incredible, and 
to Receive the Impossible 
to our everlasting journey 
to Heaven.

Rev. Samuel Mack
Copyright 2013

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Free verse | |

Bill


R.I.P. William Dale Eubanks
d. July 1, 2012, aged 68 yrs., Tennessee Ridge, Tennessee

Death came as no surprise
the first Sunday in July;
it claimed you, on a ridge in Tennessee,
with kin who took you in and waited with you
through the last hard days.
You kept what fears you had well hid,
did not betray with loud complaint
the fate you could not but know awaited.
A smile, a joke, a hug – exotic meals –
And genuine interest greeted all you met.
And you were, certainly, never boring
but well-traveled and smart
beyond the telling.
We’ll miss your wit, your bright demeanor,
and will remember all you freely gave ---
and what you took from us
with your passing.


Details | Free verse | |

Living With It

It crouches above the ripe strawberry of her left nipple -
a swelling blot on the flawless skinscape of her breast;
a mortality reminder, a dead bell echoing in her ear,
eclipsing future hope and all she holds dear.
Mornings, in the bathroom, she absently fingers it
and feels the ice-curl of chill around her heart

as subterranean steam February-frosts the mirror with a hazy gleam.
Nightly she lies thigh-to-thigh with him.
He tastes the vanilla butter scent of her skin.
She tastes horror's metallic tang; crushing close to him,
sweaty with anxiety and morbid with imaginings;
slipping through the cradle of his arms, that fault-line crack,

as the earth and her world quietly shatter apart.
And she knows words are helpless to hold back the fear-frosted air.
The horror is strung between them, taut as a tightrope
across which creep all her figures of fear -
the dream demons who whisper constantly in her ear.
And all she wants is normality's reassuring touch -

a benign, safe hand upon her arm.
She tries to hide within the details of daily living
and takes small comfort where she can:
mundane morning rituals, the clatter of diurnal routine,
dishes dunked in foam-bubble water,
telephones ringing, voices asking.

Snowdrifts of hospital appointments pile up on a table.
And she feels isolate and separate as a snowflake;
a temporal frailty melting on the heat-pulse of humanity.
She no longer feels human.
Cells mushroom and proliferate within her body's twisting maze;
sickness spreading through labyrinthine arteries,

darkness shadowing veins' corridors, gathering in nodes.
A hidden malignity glitters in the web of infinity;
her skin shimmers ice-iridescent with radiation.
Cold mornings close in.
She prepares antioxidant-rich fruit in a bowl,
slicing strawberries with surgical precision.


Details | Free verse | |

SIMPLICITY

I am a rock of impurity and potential
potential in pursuit of simplicity
simplicity is the ART of cleansing oneself..
one's self cleansed of all unnecessary excess
excess, the lust of materialism
materialism asaults my nature
nature whispers to the soul
soul advocates for truth
truth overcomes my destructive desires
desires submit to values
values bring purity
purity weds peace
peace mother's harmony  
harmony is body, soul, and mind in balance
balance is where one discovers simplicity..

Yes,
simplicity is my magnificent obsession
obsession that refines
refines my rock into gold!

Sponsor: Catie Lindsey
Contest Name: Alchemy


Details | Free verse | |

Bringing Life To All

Thunder and lightning ruled the black night
As the frightened young mother struggled 
Beads of sweat ran down her pretty face
The old midwife calmly sponged off sweat
She hummed a lullaby to soothe her pain
Praying that the husband would be back soon
Five miles to travel in treacherous weather 
Seeking the one doctor for hundreds of miles
Twelve hours of labor now seemed like days. 

Fell trees and shaved off roof tops, toppled by whipping winds 
Rising rivers were swollen, and flooded make shift roads
Endless rain poured like there would be no end
Meanwhile her unborn child lay bridged as it battled for release
Suddenly the door burst open and the doctor rushed in
His clothes sticking to his skin; there was no time to change 
With his palm he felt her forehead asking pertinent questions
He and the old midwife tried manually to turn the exhausted child
At each attempt, mother’s painful cry was heard in the distance
She gave one guttural scream and usherd her baby into the world
The child, born limp, barely breathing as the mid wife took her away

He starred into her eyes, and knew that she was beyond his help
He brought the new born to lie in her mother’s warm arms
The silence was noticeable; the raging storm had passed
The sound of light rain, now a comfort, gently tapped upon tin roof
In a soft, weak voice she called her husband and managed a smile
Then she blessed her child with words from a mother’s heart
“May you be a light, swift as lightning when days grow dark.”
“May you have wisdom and foresight beyond your days” 
“May your heart nurture and remain open to love”
“Like rain, may you bring life to all “
“Born this stormy night, your name will be “Rain”.

~*~
By    : Audrey Carey
Note: Imagination at work:) Written for Constance's "Rain, The Story" Contest.
My imagination took me to some little village in Africa.  This scene is played out in 
many villages where health care is non-existent.  However, there's always, thanks 
to God, a wise, caring "midwife" to help mothers during delivery.
Everyday, countless miracles are performed by God through "midwives"!


Details | Free verse | |

An Unspeakable Hurt

Sleeping in your crib, you were curled onto your side, A thumb inside your mouth, a blanket cuddled in your arm. Only 18 months old, your baby blue eyes so beautiful, How could anyone bruise you this way, your innocence lost, Who was it who hurt you like this, if only you could talk. You take a bottle from me and nuzzle into my grasp, I want to protect you from any more harm and pain, All I can do right now, is love and care for you with all I have, And give your medications that will make you strong again. So I kiss you good night and place you back in your crib, May your night be filled with good fairies and sweet dreams. Then Social Services will take you away when you are well, I only hope and pray that you will be safe now forever more. **A true story from my Nursing career working in Pediatrics. Written by Lee Ramage September 19, 2011 For Debbie Guzzi’s contest “Children” Won 8th place


Details | Free verse | |

Insight out

Inner sanctuary
envision harmony and mental clarity
focus on a journey of possibility
Meditate on transformation and 
awareness of inner state
peace and healing

Constructive thought
instruct your mind
to redirect the lost and struggling inner voice
Where you can’t see the wood for the trees 
under your nose is the path of freedom 
wholeness

Put aside perceived struggles
revitalize, relax, respond
to body, mind, heart and spirit
Intuition, introspection and spiritual renewal
bring about personal healing and
conscious awakening

Stillness of mind – concentration
Thoughts of the subconcious and subliminal
beyond all negativity 
away from all interuption
To allow time for self communication and
expression of inner self

Senses – awareness of scent, sight, sound, taste and touch
Healing hands of the medical profession or alternative therapy
ambiance, temperature, oils, music, sounds and 
sights of nature or universe
realisation comes in various form and shape 
causing us to feel life in fullest expression

Connecting – whispers of wind 
radiating everpresent warmth of sun
a blanket of love and light comforts consoles over and through the cosmos
rippling infinately through infinity outwards, onwards
connecting right back into where we are at right now 
unmoved unchanged and as we were

Wise – responsible courageous allowed to let go of need to be judgemental or 
be judged 
let go of controlling enable trust wisdom and humility
intelligence of knowing others
wisdom of knowing self
strength in mastering others
power to master oneself

Energy -breath, force, spirit, soul, God, universe – 
whatever – doesn’t matter how you refer to it on personal level 
energy, balance, light, sound, vibration, peace 
centered self – stillness – silent – eternal – 
to have enough is a richness in itself
accept appreciate and acknowledge oneself


Details | Free verse | |

Healing bridge

The plains people such as Lakota, Crow and Ojibwa
Spread throughout the Native American world
Who believe that the sickness is borne out of
The individual’s being out of harmony in life.

Witchery, sorcery, wizardry ways they heal it
Out of the three they prefer the witchery way
Corn pollen is said to be pure and immaculate
Sprinkling with corn pollen helps to cure disharmony

In fact corn pollen so powerful and trusted 
That people carry it simply for good luck.
Navajo shamans confirms it as the most powerful
It’s a  healing bridge between humans and spirits

                            +++++++

Date:5-11-13
Dr. Ram Mehta
Sixth Place Win
Contest: Native American people by Shanity Rain


Details | Free verse | |

Epilepsy

Sudden and strangely strong
many shocks flood my body
causing muscles to stiffen
in protest.
Does it hurt?
Sometimes.
My mind drowns itself in
electricity without prior warning
causing a myriad of odd seizures. 
Each one different from the 
last; no seizure is the same.
My memory is not impaired,
I remember every one and 
everything around me,
although speech disappears.
People appear scared, not from me
but from what I have – epilepsy.
Many stigmas float around the
condition, many are as false
as the common school rumour.
Still they are believed like an old
wife’s tale.
Epilepsy?
An unwanted burden,
it limits possibilities, 
still I have it and so bare
its unwanted scars.
My life impounded and unfulfilled,
epilepsy is a curse without
any hope of a cure,
it’s only made controllable
by a blend of concoctions created
by textbook intellect.
Still my body and soul remain my own
regardless of how hard it tries
to take control,
I remain confident and strong.
Epilepsy?
Dominant as it may be life must
go on and I must continue to grow
and prosper.



Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide (CO) Week 2: Carbon Cabrona

Smokeless inhales hurt.
I cough tar on my shirt.
As my black lungs breathe,
Shrilling exhales wheeze.

Cabrona
Falls me
Down to
My knees.

The nicotine cracks
My will.
My composure
Spills.

I want 
This.
I must 
Have this.

I sink
Into
The brink
Of madness.


Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide (CO) Week 1: O.D.A.A.T.

Chain smoke until
I'm in care of the CO.
There's one left, still.
I smoke it really slow.
"It's the end," I anticipate
As the last inch evaporates.

I can't get
Over it;
It's over before 
I know it.
Butt, I can't quit.
I'm possessed with this 
Obsession; I'm addicted.

My lungs have oxygen,
Yet I'm suffocating inside.
I can't breathe again
Without my 'noxide.


Details | Free verse | |

Being Lonely Feeling Lonely

Sometimes the loneliest times 
are when I am not alone,
and a stream of conversation invades my ears.

Sometimes the loneliest times
are when I'm with you
and you see my empty gaze stare into you.

Sometimes I want to be lost in the world
Sometimes I choose to disappear.

Sometimes the loneliest times
are when I am alone
and my thoughts force me into darkness.

Sometimes I wish that you could be me,
Sometimes I want you to see what I see.

Sometimes the loneliest times
are when my brain stops
and thought becomes the hardest thing

in the world.


Details | Free verse | |

Cancer, You are an Artist

Cancer, you are an artist
A prolific one at that,
For several dear ones
Have encountered your work.

Your wretched fingers as sculptors
Design imprints of faces unknown.
You smudge white, pain-ridden clay
A little here, a little there,
Till your subject becomes amorphous.

But oh you are not finished!
A red cross encrusted kiln
Invariably cements your doings.
A surgery of crackling and burning,
Until the shape is spit out,
A hard shell lost of all dignity.

Satisfied with your creation,
You give it one last look
Before it rests on an earthly shelf
And another project is begun.

I am sad to say,
You are quite skilled at your craft.


Details | Free verse | |

Hello Carolyn

For my Devonshire
To which I dare to aspire
I still feel your fire 
Nay deny that you retire
My wish for you to sail higher
This many do desire
We continue to conspire
Father her life is no on the wire
I beseech you sire
Much love have we all acquired
Though her fears may be dire

Toss those to the wind
With this message I send
You are my dear dear friend
No matter what end
With these words i say again
Father she is my friend 
My true next of kin
It's time to see a wind


Details | Free verse | |

Oddly Enough

Multiple fractures of my skull
Makes my thoughts void and null
Motor neurons now shut down
Synapse connections now unwound
Muscles jerk
All thought burned away
But oddly enough
This was my finest day.


Details | Free verse | |

A Winter Walk

I needed some time, some space to think
And it was either take a walk or drink
And since I knew drinking would solve nothing
I put on my shoes and I started walking

The wind blew the chilly air
Through my unkempt locks of hair,
But I hardly felt the biting cold,
Walking with memories warm in my soul

The street was dark, cold and silent
It was funny the places where my mind went
While I slowly walked across the blacktop road
No destination in mind where I would go

It's funny the things you will remember
I recall a day in mid-December
And how suddenly, nothing seemed the same
After that man at the door called my name

I followed him into a secluded office
Where he would tell me his diagnosis
And suddenly I felt my beating heart
But the rest of the world had just stopped

I felt a hand in mine get tighter
I don't think the room could have been quieter
I shook my head in total disbelief
Too numb to feel anything, even grief

The question asked, "What does this mean?"
But the answer didn't mean anything
My head too fuzzy, my thoughts too jumbled
I turned to my love to speak, but mumbled

I don't remember what else he said
Because of the swirling thoughts in my head
It took three days before I could even think
Which led me to tonight: walk or drink

So I walked and I thought and I truly remembered
Dreams of the past, love treasured forever
Friendship and laughter, sorrow and pain
As though I was reliving my life over again

Little things that I'd sorely taken for granted
Things that didn't happen the way that I planned it
Promises made and ones that were broken
Love that was shared, love still unspoken

The frosty air filled me with a sense of renewal
Inside my soul was fighting a duel
The angel, the devil, both battling demons
Inside of myself I fought to redeem them

I don't know who won the ethereal battle
And I'm not sure right now it even matters
Where once I believed everything for a reason
I'm finding that harder and harder to believe in


Details | Free verse | |

Restoration

Peace to all of the inhabitants within and without the universe
Respect to all existence both stagnant and dynamic
No desire to understand only to observe and appreciate

Those who’ve sought understanding have greatly misunderstood

They intend to change (upgrade) and will inevitably spike altercation
Disrupting and forever corrupting universal equilibrium

Effort to become God the creator and healer of all is the cause of disruption

Persevering disabling efforts to be God with the determination of correction is the cause of infinite corruption – the effect of cyclical disruption




“____ heals all wounds”




No human is able to fix
We are only able to use
An attempt to restore is abuse




“____ heals all wounds”




Rest  


Details | Free verse | |

TAKING BACK LIFE WASN'T EASY

Once life slipped from my young days,
taking away all happiness;
it rained, but flowers didn't grow,
hope was as far as a rainbow...
deprivation and longing
made me shout at my ill fate
to stop its wrongdoing
before it turned to hate.


Yes, taking back life wasn't easy,
but what's left is mine to pursue...
to enjoy before my hour of death;
and I hope that it will continue  
without disrupting the harmony
between love and happy living:
'though lost time can't return,
the present is enough! 


Years have passed and generosity
has flourished in a loveless heart,
now, every friend notices how 
it loves them without resentment;
and they reflect over my words,
" Taking back life wasn't easy...
I fought hard and won
by making the right choices!" 


Details | Free verse | |

Meteorological Migraine

There’s rain in my brain,
A pitter patter on the old grey matter,
Cats and dogs in the cerebral cogs,
A shower dampening my mental power.
There’s precipitation in my imagination,
A cloud collision in my vision,
A deluge in my centrifuge,
A tidal surge has overwhelmed my optimistic urge,
A tsunami is rampaging through my spiritual harmony,
A lighting strobe just struck my frontal lobe.
There’s a vortex in my cortex,
An eddy in my heady,
A blizzard in my gizzard,
Hail in my vapour trail,
Sleet on my feet,
Snow on my big toe
Making me feel low.

I’ll pop a pill and rest my head
Upon a bed of feather
And when I wake I’m hoping
For bright eyes and better weather.


Details | Free verse | |

It hurt me

Sitting here knowing that you are laying in that bed
Helpless on meds that you dont want to be on
Not knowing were you are
It hurt me to see you that way Mother
Praying to the Lord that you are going to be ok
Praying that he dont take you so soon away
I hate this so much
Seeing you in and out and its nothing I can do
I just wish apon a star
That all your sickness go away
and you dont have to deal with this no more
It sucks spending your Bday in that bed 
I pray that that you get better soon
so you can come home
I pray that all this go away and you never have to deal with this any more
No matter what we go though
I only have one mother
and I dont know how I would live my life without you
Please come home and get better 
So i can stop this crying
Please all your pain and sickness go away
So I dont have to worry about getting that call oneday
and I am not there by your side
You are my mother and I love you
If you have a mother and you all are not on the best term
Its best to do that soon
Because you never know when they time is up
I love you mother
My one and only Queen
Please get better and come home soon


Details | Free verse | |

Sanity

my sanity seems to unravel

like frayed shoe-laces on a rainy day

I keep tripping on in the mud

but when I go to tie them

I find myself barefoot

rooted in an unsatiable lust

for something other than reality

a blood-letting of sorts

a scream that dies

before it escapes my throat

my struggle is not one of boredom or regret

rather a confusing mixture

of powders, pills, and mind-control

and some weird state of non-commital emotion

a dark ocean of something mistakenly called

anti-depression

I’ve never really been in control

but I fight with a might that might surpise you

and win most battles and lose most wars

realizing too late that I’m the only one

keeping score

another day of willing the sun to stay down

to allow me to drown

in a dreamscape of something greater

inhibit my feelings or leave me alone

this is something I’ll always fight

alone



Details | Free verse | |

The Four Horsemen

I saw the Four Horsemen -
the famous apocalypse guys.
They rode silently past neatly folded laundry,

They approached me in silence,
their breathe a rye and meadow wind.
Each of them in turn,

gliding ghostlike past where I sat,
watching steam on the mirror
grow cold.

War had no use for me,
past my prime, bum knee.
Not even as cannon fodder.

Famine had little to work with,
I had known hunger, want, poverty,
nothing he had could scare me.

Pestilence likewise dismissed me out of turn,
for which I’ll be forever grateful,
probably too sedentary to spread the touch.

And Death, well, we all must dance,
but today is not the day, now not the hour,
Death merely bid me good day.

And then they were gone, their vacancy tangible,
while I decided to look up embolisms or strokes,
trying to close this doorway into myself.

Until I saw the tracks in the talcum powder,
heard the soft whicker of horse,
and tasted their life on my tongue.


Details | Free verse | |

Anorexia Nervosa

A child
No more than 12 years old
Sees images of women
Thin
Beautiful
Rich
Wanted
She looks in the mirror
She doesn't see the image
Her body doesn't fit the mold
Movies, TV and magazines
Tell her she is not what they want
She is not thin
She is not beautiful
Everyday her eyes cry as she looks at who she is
The perfect her hidden within
The beautiful soul they will not let her see
She diets
She starves
Still she does not fit the mold
She feels unloved
Unwanted
Eating less than a cracker a day
Throwing up the scant food she eats
Her body changes
Wasting away
They make her up
She wears a beautiful white dress
They close the lid
Denied the perfect her
The person she should have been
She lies in eternal rest
But she is loved
She is wanted
She will be missed


Details | Free verse | |

An Unfair Ending (Edited for space limits)

His face, withered, gaunt
His eyes cloudy, filled with a haunting vacancy
His voice weak , shallow
Seldom spoken these last difficult days

His hair is white and thin
His skin, so delicate and discolored
The strength has left his fragile body
And he lies, waiting

Yet I remember the man who was my Father
In my youth, so tall and strong
His eyes a deep blue with a depth of the seas
Thick, wavy, black hair tousled about his head

He walked with an unaware arrogance
Never knowing that all eyes were upon him
This handsomest of men, beautiful, confident
No one could match his brilliance, his seductive air

Unconscious, innocent of the power he possessed
The command he held with peers, a leader of men
A bright star in the universe, a life spent searching for answers
Politics, Economics, Religion…his battlegrounds

Yet, with all his perfection
He remained kind and true to all
Generous, loving; never an unkind word
A light for all who knew him

But the cruelty of life is worse for some
His body wracked with an unforgiving disease
Seizing him, slowly at first…a tremor
Then completely, leaving him helpless

Dependent upon those who had worshipped his strength
Lying in his bed, languished, weak
Nearly impossible to eat, difficult to drink
Each day descending further into darkness

Life’s cruelest blow to one so special 
Chosen by angels as their brightest star
So blessed to have loved such a man
Still loved, but pitied for the terrible loss

For such men were never meant to suffer this fate
To fade each day, closer to oblivion
He would never have chosen this
Broken, suffering silently in stoic resignation

Pride now replaced with painful gratefulness
He tries to manage a smile
His rigid muscles fighting the instinct
For he spent his life smiling

But old age has given him no peace
No time to reflect on the legacy he leaves
He waits as life deals its unjust ending
For one who was so great, so good

I hold his cold, thin hand in mine
Holding back the tears that burn
I will remember him, the Father whom I have loved
I see him walk away, wavy black hair, a cute little wink

As he leaves this tired shell, worn, used up
Once again becoming the unbroken man
I see him strut again, his quick, bouncy steps
As he climbs the ladder to the heaven he has earned

I hear the trumpets of the angels
Welcoming their special creation
A man of compassion and ideals
My Father, My Daddy…How I will miss him


Details | Free verse | |

Emotional Bruise

Emotionally pinched
bruises the mind
blinds the eye from seeing
internal scars still bleeding
denial of the worst kind
feelings left behind
alone and distraught
in shadows of black and gray
surrounded by emptiness
.
Heart in shreds
gloom and dread
torn apart thoughts
doors of communication closed
beyond reach in saving
numb in soul
crying inside for help
prisoner of pain and hurt
trapped in confinement
of misery.


Details | Free verse | |

So Cold

This room is so cold,
My goosebumps have goosebumps,
My earmuffs need earmuffs,
My coat has a jacket,
I mean COME ON!

This room is so cold,
I think some penguins just slid by,
I think that man is solic ice,
I think.. yeah that is a bonfire!
I mean COME ON!

This room is so cold,
Kids are having a snowball fight,
Is that man dancing or having a seizure?
Oh.. He's just shivering... Very Violently!!
Call the Police!
The Ambulance!
Is there a doctor in the House!!
Maybe I should help.

I would,
If this room weren't so cold...


Details | Free verse | |

Vices

Powder dreams and acid queens
Snow white bliss and razor 
blades
Rails so thick your heart will 
bleed
Find your fix so you’ll succeed 
Uppers, downers, sweet cocaine
Every demon has a name
All that matters is the fight
To stay alive and in the light
It hurts so bad right through the 
core
You fear two words and that’s 
coke whore
Cut so deep to feel alive
With every shot you build your 
pride
The fiery rush and burning lust
Nothing else matters f*** their 
trust
A slip, a fall is all it takes
To see you land back on your 
face
The heart that breaks can’t take 
no more
Your soul is gone thrown on the 
floor
The pills you pop the smack you 
shoot
The crack you cook the lines 
you toot
The midnight toke that liquid 
courage
That blissful coke won’t be 
discouraged
Rapping, tapping on your door 
Claiming your body take some 
more
A stressful day a slip from grace
A couple more makes my heart 
race
The walls cave in two worlds 
collide
I wait in horror as my heart dies
A crash of sound a rush of red
Crimson tears are filled with 
dread
The sirens fade and fall away
Too late for fate this ends today


Details | Free verse | |

The Evoultion of Learning (Part Two)

As long as various people run various nations
There will forever be war
What the world needs is one leader
A common man who believes in the working class
As well as the Lord
Instead of one Nation under God
Lets make it one World under God
And just let each individual decide what he or she wishes to call that God
So I here by nominate our dear friend Vince Suzadail Jr.
The first candidate of the new world order 
He seems to have the best Political views I’ve heard
And I think he alone could do a much better job
Than all the leaders of all the nations are doing
At least I’m certain he couldn’t do any worse
And that way all the super intelligent people devising ways 
Of destroying our world
Could find something more constructive to spend their time on
Like raising a crop or milking a cow
Saving a child or helping elderly with their needs 
There are plenty of folk who need a hand
Lets all start offering them ours instead of cutting theirs off
I’m just a simple man
My actual world is very small
My family, friends and neighbors
I love you all and hope you know I’ll do anything for you I can
There is no malevolence left in me
I know how to make and use a shank, zip gun or small explosive
But I’ve learned not to
For I’ve learned to think with my heart and soul
They do a much better job than my mind
I just wish the great minds of the world
Were smart enough 
To figure out what I have
And learn to love with all of their hearts


Details | Free verse | |

anonymous hopes and promises

I won't use your name,
because people like us,
like to sometimes,
remain anonymous.
I hope you make it till Friday,
I hope you find a place,
theres so much I could say,
how about just a couple promises,
from junkie to junkie.
I promise after Thursday ends,
Friday will begin.
I promise that you are,
definitely worth it.

I hope you make it till Friday,
I hope you find a place.
But what I hope for most for you,
I hope, for hope, for you.

I hope you do.
I really hope you do.


Details | Free verse | |

The Power of Pain

pain is a mover,
and a shaker,
stirs one to action
to escape its evil claws

It has its own schedule-
and mocks your attempts
to deal with it
and it never takes a pause

Its tendrils spread throughout-
as certain bastions of misery-
scattered all about-
the fortress of agony

you can try to ignore it,
but never successfully,
or fight it with med's
but you will be forced to see
such efforts are so useless,
It was what was meant to be

you can't reason with it,
just endure it until
it's had its merry fill
of sadistic persecution,
don't let it break your will

alone I battle
fear of death
at times
creeps into my thoughts....


Details | Free verse | |

Her True Love (Palindrome)

Her
love
so true
it brings a smile
makes the heart sings
softly
kisses 
her charming
kisses
softly
makes the heart sings
it brings a smile
so true
love
Her

~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~

Author's Comment: Palindrome, also known as the Mirrored Poem, reads forwards and 
backwards.   It stems from the Greek word palindromos: palin, meaning again, and dromos, 
meaning a running. Combining the two together, the Greek meaning gives us, running back 
again. The concept of the “mirrored images” reflects an “image mirrored,” which includes a 
word in the center of the poem as a reversal point for the sentence or even the poem.  
There is no set number of stanzas or any rules for construction.

~~~~~~~***~~~~~~~


Details | Free verse | |

Princesses

Pretty princesses
Dancing all around
Frolicking through fields
Very beautiful
Just like you!


Details | Free verse | |

LOVE

Loyalty
One self
Virtuous
Eternity


Details | Free verse | |

heiroshima enemies in your homeless shelters making fun off the war torn

its all for you right


Details | Free verse | |

A Doctor's Prayer

#Doctor #medicine #Christian #Prayer

Lord this is my prayer as a doctor each and every day... 
Help me to always help someone in some meaningful way
Let me not wounds others already hurting with lackadaisical words today
Lace my tongue with mercy I earnestly pray

Guide me each moment so that my therapeutic footsteps do not falter
Help me so that at least one person's pain I may with your healing power alter
Direct my mind to industriously take in every important detail
Assist me to stay optimistic and resolute even when I fail

Take control of these hands so they may do impressive works
Give me the patience of a saint to solve the things that do irk.
Aid me to remember that I am human but together we can accomplish much
Guide my hands to always provide the most gentle and compassionate touch

Remind me every day lest I forget the reason I became a physician 
Help me remember there are more important things than my commission
Guide my lips when I speak to a patient regarding their condition
Let me rejoice with a grateful heart when I can say the word remission

Lord let me never forget the importance of each of the duties I perform
Let me never become so prideful that I overlook the lives we can transform
Lord help me to remember how important a smile can be
To someone who feels hopeless and afraid and is looking to me


Details | Free verse | |

New Stars Are Formed

Strange colored skies climb northernly this night
Calling our future with wild deamons eyes
Abscure as the creatures who answer the call
Wild are the answers of the reasons and the faults
Certain as the well swept winds
Alluring in it's grasp fought negatively through single wins
I pray twords the skies and it curdles and swims
Thoughts twords the sun and it scorches my rims
Carry me far enough I can be within your sights
Stash us away and the sun will be bright
Motors may break but oceans will be light
I will stay on the coast and wait 
The award I will do is make the evening a minute late
Parched is the gulf as the single minute breaks
Great is the second docks a seperate mans gate

The Earths crust slowly begins to crumble
It quivers, then quakes, it slowly opens, the rivers break
A star is born somewhere, a beautiful new star
Great is the struggle, born from the heavens a small light it makes

The new star pulls, it turns, then it feeds and it's fuel it burns
Gently it orbits following all things it understands
The new star bends it dances it stands
Tancing outwardly as creations comprehend

A continient wavers as the new star binds its brand
It feeds off of our oceans as our tides wash in
It goes just as softly forward and back
As the rays of its placement barrow up to the sun
We watch very carefully because it's damages are already done


Details | Free verse | |

Important Safety Information

Like all prescription Coulrophobias, CLOWNS may increase the chance of heart disease 
or risk factors for it, such as high blood pressure of when clowns are seen for long 
periods.

CLOWNS should not be seen right before or after certain heart surgeries.

Serious skin reactions or stomach and intestine problems such as colourful bleeding and 
humorous ulcers, can occur without warning and may cause animal balloons. Elderly 
patients and those taking cotton candy are at increased risk for stomach bleeding and 
ulcers.

Tell your doctor if you have: a history of passing out at the circus, fleeing from mascots 
or kidney and liver problems. CLOWNS should not be seen in late pregnancy.

Do not see CLOWNS if you’ve had an asthma attack, hives or other allergic reactions to 
bad magic tricks or any other Coulrophobia medicine or drugs called red nose.

Life threatening allergic reactions can occur with CLOWNS. Get help right way if you’ve 
had swelling of the face or trouble breathing.

Prescription CLOWNS should be seen exactly as prescribed at the lowest dose possible 
and for the shortest time needed.


Details | Free verse | |

The 2011 Grin


Grinning facetiously, frozen in 
The moment, zealously enjoying frivolity,
With smile, ovaled wide-open mouthed, clean bright 
Sparkling pearl white teeth ... all majestically a glow.
Fire powered with healthy purity.

Accompanied by a loud euphonious deep thundering 
Voice, intensely roaring aloud ... louder
Almost deafening,
Exhilarate sounds of joy, 
Part of the flash, exuberance and health in the moment.

Cheerful tears of uncontrollable glee
Ecstatically flowing, drop by drop,
Slow,  
Into an loosely-defined pool of happiness,
To celebrate healthy blessedness.

The joy of the new 2011...  with its uncertainty
An opportunity to review, rectify, and grow with hope.
Time to re-stoke the fire of faith
In all that we are
And with all that we have...

Let Us Come Together To Build a Non-Violent World


© Charles H Keys, 2011


Details | Free verse | |

My Miracle

My request to relay to your kinfolk That made their journey inside Heaven's Gate To keep a watch over one of my folk Her parents have reserved her special date She met all the medical needs guidelines For the best research university All the scientists studying her enzymes Have expertise to do the surgery Skilled technicians on this miracle case All are trained to perform as a machine All prayers are needed, for wishes of grace Don't want any, wishes to be unseen Spring is in the scheme for her release date Grandpa, waits for the day I see my mate


Details | Free verse | |

If Wrists Could Speak

Fear
loathe
pity us Not

We scars

so judiciously brought into existence
by silent shreds
of emotion:

Jagged sighs,
wretched smiles,
come journey Dysfunction.

We beg your brave outsiders' senses
to peer

Are you
Perplexed by soft whispers
that emanate Clear
from each
line?

Does our breadth
of a slice
of depth
of vice

the stripping of seams
to bloodlines
within,

defy perfect dreams
of sweet nectar
skin?

Dare you touch these velvet ropes
muddied
from cold steel
hue

now dry 
in caked puddles 
of lost hopes,

once winding
thick
through?

Fear
loathe
pity us Not

We scars

so judiciously sought into existence
by silent shreds
of promise:

Sound larks
of empathy's
song,

Heed the marks
of our concern,
liquid and long...

We merely yearn
to be forgotten

in realms of healing
Hope
begotten.


Details | Free verse | |

Dream Reflections

Dream Reflections

So drained,
I feel like a trained monkey
Who is paid to dance

I can't wait for 
The chance to sleep 
If it doesn't 
Happen soon
Grim reaper might come
Knocking at my door
When I fall asleep
 Driving home

I shall visit the moors of 
Ancient fairies and 
Hills of enchantment,
Once my curly head lands 
On my feather pillow

I might dream of lazy days
Laying under a weeping willow tree
After taking a long dip in a cool 
Stream on a hot summer day

Who knows where my 
Subconscious might take me,
Good thing my 
Admission will be free,
Because I don't have a 
Penny on me currently

Time is ticking so swiftly
 These trying days,
I must say goodbye,
Before I drift off to 
Dreamland too suddenly

Goodnight


Details | Free verse | |

The Running Man

Leg over leg
I watch
Oh once great majestic man
Stuffed with life and vigor
Stood atop the world
Champion
Once conqueror of mountains
Now crushed by pleasure
Turned animal of desire 
Now the running re-claimer
Of past honors

Leg over leg
I watch
One step at a time
His lungs smashing against his insides,
As they fight for air,
Against a nicotine choke hold

Leg over leg
I watch
His feet
They burn,
Sprinting through a Savannah of flames
The weight of his past gluttony slows him down
And chains of sweets
Bind him to a mountain of food;
An animal
 Hungry for progress

Leg over leg
I watch
A hurricane of alcoholic despair swells above him
As a downpour of liquor whips his beast of a body
And all that he has drank
 Tries to wash him away

Leg over leg
I watch
His vision blurs,
The distant mountains and clouds begin to swirl,
The road ahead bends and buckles, 
His legs vanish beneath him
And he greets the floor with open arms

I watch
His heart rages
Trapped in a cage
The animal pushes and pulls aggressively
Painfully biting against his chest 
Until it finally becomes quiet
Still
Strangled by the smoke, grease and alcohol
Silencing all who witnessed their reign of terror
His body unmoving
Just inches from the finish line
Still
I watch 


Details | Free verse | |

A Moment of Lucidity

Wrestling with consciousness
fading in and out,
 the darkness threatens to sweep me away
Where am I?
How did I get here?
What happened?
No voice escapes my lips
dry, parched tongue mouths wordlessly
as dreams tangle with reality
swimmingly, a face appears
in a moment of lucidity
in the storm of incoherency
I remember your face
your love
your lifeline to me
a tenderness fills me with warmth,
as I sink back into the darkness
but now there is a light....


Details | Free verse | |

My Shield

Troubles cast my way are repelled, bouncing off a shield, a bubble, created to protect sanity and health. Resilient is this bubble, casting away strife and ill will, but it also isolates. Nothing comes in; nothing goes out. Emotions on overload, but still in control. Should a kind soul pierce this bubble, I would be both vulnerable and grateful. Loneliness gnaws at my spirit. Take a pin and burst this bubble, but only if you are prepared to offer comfort, accept conditions I cannot control. Surrounded by a bubble, living in peace and prepared to accept God’s will. This shield will not fail me. Will you?
*Written for the "Bubble" contest.


Details | Free verse | |

all my life I ate bad things

all my life 
I ate 
bad things

I have made a resolution 
never to put bad things 
in my mouth again

each day
I now find myself 
having to redefine

what is
a 
bad thing


Details | Free verse | |

Enslaved By Darkened Feminine Race

Enslaved by dominance and shackles,

Submissively obedient in silence,

Femme fatales with their modernized slavery,

Man kneels and then bows,

Yielding to remain in servitude,

Controlled by the darkened dominant feminine race.


Details | Free verse | |

A Shot of HIV

Heart blushes
Full of threat
As the blood swims on the inner
Carries danger on its hosts
Infections amidst

Cells stopped dancing
As the virus replicate
Immunity shut down
Nerves get crazier

The brain sings a lonely tune
As the body waved goodbye
Never imagined that one pleasure
Will bring an unwanted harm
The system has surrendered
Death applauded for its wait
The physique is now gray
Eyes closed as the viral paved way


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Fallen Trees

To be posted soon


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The sweetness

There’s some honey, so you can take they said
There’s some sugar, you might enjoy they say
But then you might not enjoy it by the end.

Within the sweetness of the word,
 There’s the sweetness of the soul
But the bittersweet taste in this mouth isn’t a foul
Cause this taste they said I might enjoy then, I certainly don’t do now.

There’s the sweetness that rests upon this body,
The sweetness streaming by the currents,
Swirling and twisting in miraculous ways,
Just cascading into another future

But then while forming now the present to the future.
This transformation brings great changes with it,
And now changing the way the dandelion dances with the wind
Creates a mess, a honed mess
But now the dandelion is dying.

Who would take care of the dandelion?
The now sweet dandelion,
That has discovered that ain't it all be sweetness,
Now the dandelion dances with the wind, evades that much sweetness and delights in the sun.

Anna~


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Yoga in Poem - A novel Approach 01 of Many


Yoga in Poem - A novel attempt 01/ Many YOGA is a priceless gift given by great ancient Indian saints for every human being through Vedas. I am trying to bring one step each week before all my known and unknown friends of Poetry Soup and for other viewers for a glimpse of this treasure of India, which in fact is a gift of Good Health for the entire humanity. Ravindra Meditation Step 01 Meditation remains The essence of healthy living And the most precious Gift given to humans By the Almighty God. We think and think And puzzle our mind With ideas and emotions With worries and Irrelevant thoughts. This goes on in our minds Ever since we find that We have grown-up To know and understand And to behave with The world. But unfortunately From that very time We unknowingly start Worrying also and Sometimes Not only during daytime But even When we are in sleep. This never ending Row of worries and worries only Sometimes for reasons And often without a season Have become a habit To lament On what we have and More on, What we do not have. This constant Lamentation and pondering Brings and form shape A Free Gift for all of us In the form of slow poisoning Which we inhale and drink Every day and every moment When we breathe and talk When we love or walk When we behave and misbehave When we are in a haste and Even when We lie on a cot Or when we fight Without a cause. This constant thinking and Worrying Slowly destroy everything Good and great in our heart Given by the Almighty God. But meditation and Yoga Can restore What we often unknowingly Just throw away By our day and night worrying Which continues When we go to sleep or Are busy in accomplishing our tasks. Meditation and Yoga Can restore What we often unknowingly Have lost By our worries While sleeping and even while Accomplishing our tasks With a gift of better and healthy life. Ravindra Kanpur India 4rd /6th July 2013 To be continued …… NOTE: The series which I am starting today is also a gift for all American friends on their Great of Independence 4th July. My Greetings for all of you. With best wishes…Ravindra
Benefits of Meditation can be seen and noted on the following webpage. http://www.ineedmotivation.com/blog/2008/05/100-benefits-of-meditation/


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Caramel Coated Promise

A caramel coated promise on a wisened old man's couch. Living in a sugar coated world 
falling into an oblivious mass of thinness and frailty. Not yet strong--Tough, no; shy, not 
either. Strength and endurance as rocky as the West coast wearing petticoats, ringing bells 
of flurious yesterdays into tomorrows hopes and dreams recalled. Billowy, flowery tulips ring 
true to the caramel coated promises. Never too rich or skinny. A waist an inch deep and 
widely thickened cream of poppy icecream screams smear me thin and shed the self as on 
onion into a glorious stick adorning a caramel coated apple. A promise to myself and not you-
- as my eyes are wide deep! Aspartame filled rats, cancer ridden corpses frozen into stark 
reality.  Stark nakedness tells no lies and makes bigger eyes!


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Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 6 Temporarily Last

Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 6

Brahmari Pranayama or Humming Bee Breath

IMP. NOTE: Temporarily I am stopping new episodes 
of Yoga in Poem due to personal reasons and will try 
to restart Yoga in Poem at a later date…



How to do Brahmari Humming Bee Pranayama


Sit in Sukhasana (Step 1) or in Padmasana in the morning hours, if you have achieved easiness to sit in Padmasana or else sit in Sukhasana. It is important that while performing Brahmari your stomach should be empty and bowls clear. Sit erect while practicing Brahmari in a neat and clean, quiet and calm place preferably an open place.
Raise your both arms and bring your all four fingers as a screen on your eyes. Now close your ears by the tips of your thumbs in such a way that your index fingers are touching your eyebrows and the middle finger the inner corner of your both eyes and other two fingers rests on the slopes of your nose and face joints gradually.
Take a deep breath and fill your lungs with the fresh air and then exhale slowly from both the nostrils while creating a humming sound. At the time of doing this do not open your ears and keep pressing it gently so that your humming sound gets more clear and it create vibrations in your mouth, throat, ears, eyes and even other parts of your body ( this stage would come when you  practice this exercise regularly ) 
Try to creat the humming sound continuously as loud and  clear as possible for you. 

Ravindra

IN PRAISE OF BRAHMARI PRANAYAMA We all know and accepts The miracles of Sound On everything which Surrounds us. We live, we love, and we work We play and we laugh With one or the other kind of sounds Often We become harsh or soft Even we weep and sometimes We hate with some or the other kind of sounds only These are all the effects of Different Sounds Which make us What we are and what We become as a man or woman in life Kind hatred or benevolent A lover or a hater A teacher or a Poet, a writer or an artist or a Musician A leader or a preacher Or even A dictator or a Don. When sound comes From a serene source It binds the hearts Of millions And we began to love and adore That sound and even that source And keep it as a source of energy and joy. But when it comes from A biased mind and selfish source and Tries to destroy our peace And began to dictate us We feel fed-up To bear that sound And then we try To get rid of that source or sound. Brahmari or the humming Sound Is one such elegant self-music Which opens our heart and mind With its vibrations To fill life in those dead or sluggish Nerves and spine To restore The Melody not only In your voice but also in your heart and mind. Brahmari would Restore your love and even your confidence Thus Bringing your beloved more close to you And you to your beloved Which often Becomes a soft target of differences Because of Age effected unnoticed deeds and actions. Brahmari gives you the boon of Music and melody Even when age has taken you On the withering heights of life And You often find yourself standing alone Looking for someone to Restore your energy and mind. The miracles of Humming bee sounds Brings an instant coolness To your otherwise Anguished mind and heart Which began to enjoy The colors and moods Of Love and Life As A peaceful mind Is the dwelling place of heavenly gestures And even of God. The regular practice of Brahmari Balances your hormonal secretions Invigorating the thyroid gland And thus increasing your metabolism. Even Brahmari balances Your blood sugar and helps Oxidizes fats In our body and It completely removes the causes which Leads to the curse of human body The Migraine By giving you the joys and comforts of Relaxation which ultimately Soothes your Heart to pump more actively The fresh flow of blood To your nerves and mind Thus making your pressures To work happily Without crossing the limits Unless you have done some extreme wrongs. It’s a boon for those Who suffers from Diabetes and heart problems And a real gift of God For those who are in pregnancy As its wonderful effects on Human nervous system Effects the pituitary gland To balance the growth and control Of hormones in our body Thus the practice of this wonderful Pranayama Pave way for easy and trouble free Child birth or delivery. I often ponder What a treasure of blessings Yoga has given to the world and Has exposed In these simple and wonderful Breathing exercises To make every human being More befitting and joyous To enjoy the blessings of Nature And Thus elevating the human body to absorb The Beams of the Light and Love of God. Ravindra Kanpur 4th Aug. 2013
Duration: Not more than 3 to 5 times in a day in the beginning. Maximum 10 to 12 times only in a day without any force beathing or straining yourself. Precautions: 01. Never perform this Prayanama while you are lying down 02. If you are having any ear infection do not perform Brahmati till your ears get rid of all infections. 03. Do not hold your breath while doing Brahmari and Heart problem persons should do it under a trained instructor only. 04. Do not perform it when you are not empty stomach and try to perform it preferably in the morning/evening hours only. 05. If for any reasons you do not feel comfortable stop it and take few normal deep breaths IMP. NOTE: Temporarily I am stopping new episodes of Yoga in Poem due to personal reasons and will try to restart Yoga in Poem at a later date… My Gratitude Brahmari Pranayama is a boon for human being brought mainly in the lime light of the world by Swami Ram Deoji about 20 years back. Ravindra
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The Tic

Just a twitch,
started years ago,
hidden,
controlled,
no one knows this burden still exists,
held deep in my soul,
only letting go when I'm alone.
The world thinks I'm crazy,
tries to dissect,
comprehend what it all means,
when the tic wants to show.
The looks,
the stares,
the worry,
so I let it all build up,
tighten my soul,
my neck,
till I just have to let it explode.
So, there are days 
I just sit alone on my couch,
me and my twitch,
just letting it all out.
A tic,
controlled,
something I try to keep unknown.


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Love Needs No Words

You've been my caregiver so many times.
Surgery after surgery you were there. 
Never a complaint came from your lips-
Bathed me, fed me with loving care. 
All of this was behind us, we thought,
Until this year-

Oh, love, friend, soulmate of mine,
This year another surgery I fear.
A caregiver I'll need once again my love.
You laid your hand upon my shoulder,
As our heads touch, my tears did flow.
Two hearts became one, a sad note it did beat.
Love needs no words. 


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Dysfunctional Dreamtime

                                                             1.

A red helium balloon
                                   I float above myself,
Watch the ritual unfold:

                                   Gather the sharps
                                   Lay them out
                                   Roll up the sleeves
                                   Enfold the world in silence.

Then, with infinite concentration,
The Not-Me begins:

                                    Draw the lines
                                    Open the flesh
                                    Let out the hot red
                                    Pain and Poison;
                                    Inscribe another testament
                                    To survival.

Then the balloon drifts down
Sleeves roll down
The Not-Me steps into the balloon
                                    And floats away,
And I become myself again,
Purged and Whole

Until the next time.

                                                               2.

A wraith,
I live on air
Insubstantial as the Winter's mists.

I am colorless
And blank as perfect ice, as cloudless sky
Yet I command all appetites,
Control my ghostly shape
Against all outside assault.

My Will is wind,
Invisible and Absolute.

A reed,
I bend but never break.

I may be fading, fading...

But the steel rod within the mist
Shines true and will not yield.

                                                               3.

Peel back the flesh
The flowing flesh,
And see the Void within.

I am large but I am empty,
Hollow as a gourd, a husk.
Tear me and the taut surface
Will collapse upon itself.

I hunger, ever hunger
For the things that fill others up 
And keep them satisfied.

                                                     And so I eat.

                                                     I eat Love, Acceptance, Self-Confidence.
                                                     I eat Hate, Loneliness, Rejection.

And ultimately,
I consume myself.

                                                     After all, 
                                                     Who else could stomach
                                                     The taste of me?


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Love And Pricks

I Love the elderly so full of history I love my generation who kept me a mystery I love the children who's future, now bright for I have died for them to capture the light for i understand pain more than ever once I released it the anger got better as it went away from the people and into my music without a single reason to prove it without a reason to let Love's light in I didn't, it found me and lesser I sin God and my father both let me know it would all be okay so very long ago even tho the road would be full of pricks even back then I'd tell them you can all suck my dick. -Bj Fard


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An Ode to LIFE Part 1

An Ode To LIFE


As I lay my head down and start to fall asleep I see myself being carried off to a place and time the place of our Lords birth in Bethlehem of Judea

As in the Bible tells the story of His life and how he lived and died in that human seance and rose on the day He told of

I do not remember being here but I remember the story I was taught so many years ago

As I walk through the streets of Bethlehem I see each scene  and hear  every word as I am learning the story they telling is true

The writer writes of a jealous King  and his way of dealing with his people and of Mary and Joseph who came to Bethlehem to have a child

The story tells of the three wise men  who saw a star in the north and heard of a child  who was born to be the King of the Jews  and come to see and bring Him gifts 

An  angel from the Heavens above came to Mary and Joseph in a dream and told them they had to leave Bethlehem or King Herod would have their son killed 

So they left Bethlehem and went to Egypt and there they lived until King Herod no longer ruled

As I follow along in my dream I see each scene  and hear  every word as I am puzzled by the fact I understand each

I don’t understand why I’m going through this time but I know I must continue on this journey 

As I am pulling through a time where I reach the place of Jesus’ in  Nazareth of Galilee

As I watched Him grow and work in His father's shop I could see the thing in Him that were with me

As I walk along the streets and look around I hear the people talk of a child that speaks of wondrous love that’s all forgiving and of a Father in Heaven that’s loving and true.

By Rev. Samuel Mack, OMS
Copyright 2013

                                                            Inspired by God 

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


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Health Motivation

It's a job to workout
It's a struggle to get motivated
It's a pain to eat right and healthy
but it's worth your health
You say, I don't like the way I look
I don't like my health problems
I don't like the symptoms I feel
I was always told, "If you don't like something,
Do something about it and Change it"
When you're tire and worn down, push yourself
15 mins is better than 0 mins
Work hard, play hard and get results!
Workout and Eat Right
I know it's easier said than done
We all get tired
We all get discourage
We all feel the pain and struggles of trying
and don't see or feel the results
but Don't give up
Your health didn't collapse overnight
and it won't get fix overnight
Take baby steps, Walk!
We all heard that walking 30 mins a day will
improve your health
If that's what it takes to improve your health 
then DO IT! We are our worst enemies
We stop ourselves. We have pity patty parties and give up
NO MORE!!! It's time to encourage ourselves and throw a 
Motivation Party. We Can Do IT! Lets Move. Don't Die 
Life too short. Move!!! Stop throwing temper tantrums, crying
and whining. It's painful to workout but it feels good after ward
You are Important and your health is too 
If you need to, slow down but don't stop
Health Motivation, H o o r a y 


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The Real Wealth

We become aware and care for our health
When some illness grips and makes us pale
When at ease we least bother about dis-ease
And carry ourselves with a baffling unease.

It is good health that keeps us moving forward
Help pursue our aspirations with ardour worthy
And realize dreams by scaling the heights lofty
But for health all things achievable stay murky.

All luxuries under the Sun become worthless
When the physical apparatus becomes useless
If one is not fit and healthy, all things collapse
Thus it is health, which is the authentic wealth.


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Insecurity

It is a chronic disease
that eats away at my soul
as my weakened mind 
allows it to creep into the
crevices of my brain.
It destroys the skin 
on my hands and face,
picking at it until it bleeds,
leaving open sores
and patches of raw flesh 
that scab over
only to be torn open again.
It infiltrates my 
defense mechanisms,
distorting perception
until my sense of rationality
dangerously melts into
irrational territory.
I unknowingly cross over
into a place where my thoughts 
become mutated in the thick saturation
of insecurity,
and the contents of my brain
slowly begin to liquify.


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The Collector

blood bound no longer,
escaping cracked skull.
vomitous exit.
flee disembodied
evaporation fall

to concrete,
shattering in waves.
shining coloured orbs
reflected image
mini atom bombs.

descending, rolling
glass fragments
explode blue, white, gold, pink, orange
spiral through storm drains,
liquefied, as rain.

slow motion stumble, reach,
for pieces.
squinted eyes searching.
sliced skin, sharp edges
washed and dyed ink red.

whowhatwhenwherewhy

doesn’t matter,
lost my marbles.


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Boy You're Strong As An Ox

<                                     twenty ~ nine ~ little .... words
                                       ok ~ now ~ let ~ me ..... think
                                       already ~ here ~ we ..... go
                                       apples ~ bananas ......    oranges
                                       carrots ~ lettuce ........    celery
                                       milk ~ water ~ and ....... juices  
                                       helps ~ develop ........... strong
                                       minds ~ also................ bodies 








Twenty Nine Little Words
Ok Now Let Me Think
Already Here We Go
Apples Banana's Oranges
Carrots Lettuce Celery
Milk Water And Juices
Helps Develop Strong
Minds Also Bodies
                                       


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Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 4

Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 4 PADMASANA- LOTUS POSE Step 04 Posture - Sit on any flat comfortable ground or carpet/Rug/Durry. Stretch your legs in front of you loosely. Hold your right foot by the ankle and place it on your left thigh with the heel as much close to your body as you can in the beginning and later try to place it so close to your body that it presses against your left groin. Without changing or disturbing the position of your right foot flex your left knee, so that the foot comes near the body. Now lift it by the ankle and place it on your right thigh with the heel of the left foot pressing against your right groin. Please keep in mind that the soles of your both feet in this position will be pointing skywards like the petals of a full bloomed Lotus flower. For this reason it is called LOTUS POSE. Try to be as erect as possible in the beginning and keep trying to maintain this posture from few seconds to few minutes, (which you can attain after practicing it regularly). In Praise of Padmasana Padmasana is considered To be the most beneficial and Beautiful of all Asanas Because it resembles All the qualities Of the heavenly flower Lotus The Posture would Make you bloom With the inner happiness and Joy of Good health Which began to yield Its results As soon as one Get success in performing This a little difficult posture And began to practice it With ease and comfort. Padmasana stimulates slowly Your spine Making it To function More suitably and properly For your brain Which often get disturbed Due to our modern living habits And extreme dependence On the comforts of life. Practice of this posture Restore the relaxation of mind and Thus when the mind is in peace It began to shower its Wonderful results On all the vital organs of The human body Whether, We know it or not It is our mind only Which control Each and every part and Action of our body and our deeds. After learning it properly and Practicing Padmasana regularly One began to feel A new energy to face The challenges of life Which keep mounting and Increasing With more and more pressure Every day and Every night. The coolness of mind Would rejuvenate your heart To pump More fresh and energetic blood Which began to flow With the vitality of oxygen And thus Making your body & health A reality with the reflection of a Godly grace On your face, body and mind. This outcome began to show It’s appearance On You After removing gradually All the ailments caused by The Modern living conditions Like the most common and general The problem of Tension, Breathing problems, Headaches, Bad circulation of blood, General Weakness, Fatique Excessive weight problems or The problem of weight loss. After gaining The needed height In performing Padmasana You will find yourself In a new realm of Real happiness and Joy of life More close to your faith With more blessings of your God On You, As no gift is greater Then the gift of Good Health. Perfection of this Asana Leads to attain and awaken The sleeping powers Of our body Known as The Power of Kundalini* Ravindra Kanpur India 21st July 2013 PRECAUSIONS: Please do not make any hurry in learning this a little difficult posture and gradually practice and convert your Sukhasana into the Padmasana. Since it is the ideal posture for Meditation and brings peace to your mind Padmasana should always be practiced empty stomach preferably in the morning hours. V. Imp Note: Please do not try without a proper Guru or Guide for awakening the power of *Kundalini.


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Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 2

Sukhasana – The Easy Pose Step 02 Posture - Step of the Week The easy posture to start with. Just sit on any flat comfortable ground (it should not be spongy ground or beds). Fold your legs at the knees that one foot rests inside your knee fold of your opposite leg and the other foot is on the ground beneath the knee ford of the opposite leg. This is the easiest pose to start practicing Yoga till you learn and practice to sit in the next right pose for Yogic breathing we would learn as Padmasana. Sukhasana – The Easy Pose In Praise of Sukhasana When one sits In this easy pose To start practicing Yoga The mild reconditioning Of your nervous system Starts to take you In the realms of Those shining stars Which exists in Tranquility and peace. Gaining peace of mind Remains the ultimate goal Of every human being and It began to show its Beauty on your mind And your heart As soon as you start Yoga To get filled with The inner joy of peace To feel the light of your God. This simple posture would Slowly eliminate Your exhaustion and fatigue Giving you A highly needed relaxation and relief. Even if you have strained yourself By hard labor or games You will feel A soothing touch In your mind and body Which start creating its affects As soon as you practice Yoga. Your daily practice would slowly take you In the realms of peace And gradually Yoga would start It’s functioning of rejuvenating Your vital organs For a better performance Which are the key? To happiness and Your fitness and love for all. Ravindra Kanpur India 08 07 2013 ......... NEXT STEP NEXT WEEK NOTE: This pose can be practiced any number of time in a day even after meals. To see the pose of Sukhasana a URL is given below: http://www.google.co.in/search?q=Photo%20of%20Sukhasana&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&source=hp&channel=np


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Under The Weather

Curled upon the bed,Seeing visions upside down
Oh how this weather keeps me bound
Tired and achy is how my body feels
Sipping on freshly made tea
With lemon chunks and onion peels
Stuffy nose and watery eyes
I'm feeling worse as time goes by
With a high fever and sweaty feet 
And a nauseous stomach I just can't eat
Congested  I am, No one understands
At least in this way, Feeling blue....  I am today


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Liquid Handcuffs

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION

JSLambert


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Aids

There are many diseases found
in the world either widely known
or hushed up and swept under a
carpet of desperate denial.
Fear thrives even within the
names of these diseases but 
nothing like Aids; intrusive
and a slow creator of hellish
emotions, it awakes every
sense I behold making them
scream in unimaginable pain.
It was once thought to be
able to infect with the slightest
touch; skin to skin.
Hideously, it opens doors
to many other viruses and
common bacteria slowly 
weakening my defences; the
body begins to give in to
its destructive ways and 
the pain becomes a reflection 
upon my face; there is no depth 
in my facial features, they are 
as thin as a ghostly sheet.
As the days pass many thoughts
are stored within the mind that 
strangely remains able to disconnect 
from the fear and pain, even if only for
moments; life seems to be
back to normal during those
sparks of happiness.
As the bed becomes home
sleep is forever increasing;
each sunset and sunrise is
precious, like a diamond
one owns.
Slowly I drift off on a 
boat that floats on the
clearest of oceans; blue
dominates the surface where
gentle waves grow.
The boat drifts off in to
the horizon trying to reach
the star of light where my
soul will be welcomed into
the gates of heaven.

Dedicated to Freddy Mercury and other Aids sufferers


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Thank You For Blessings Me

Lord I thank You for seeing me thru
The heartache and pain,
healing my soul and making me whole
All the while  continually
Filling me with so much joy 
It is hard to contain
All I can do is smile 
As I lift Your name on high
I just want to say Thank You Lord 
For blessing me.


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Where The Next Dollar Will Come From

I'm worried where the next dollar will come from.
Will she ever arrive?
Will she ever show up?
But why am I worrying?
Stop it!
It's all in God's Great Hands!
It's all under God's control!
It's all within His plans!
It's all His
And He will provide
Because He is our Father!
He loves us!
It's all His!
Trust Him!
I know it's difficult;
He will not lead you wrong.
He knows where you need to go.
He knows what you need to endure.
It's all His plan.
It's all in His Hands!
Lay down your life;
Give the control.
He is in control!
Thank You Father!
Trust Him!
It will all be okay!
Trust Him!
Thank You God!
Thank You Jesus!
Thank You Holy Spirit!
I love You always!
I trust You always!
I trust You!
I trust You!
Yes, yes I do!
I trust You!
I love You!
Amen!


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My Heart Sings

As the first rays of sunshine
wakes me out of my sleepy slumber,
I sat up in bed and looked at my hands.
The taste of stale cigarette smoke of cheap red wine
stained my taste buds.
I walked out of bed,
turned on the radio
(to the classical station)
and my heart beats to the tune
my life and soul smile as the sun shines in my room.
I hear God whispering in my ear
I hear all the words of the world
talking to me,
and I can hear my heart sing a little.
I read my poetry,
get dressed go for a walk,
I smile at the faces that I pass;
The cars I pass,
the houses,
the trees,
the dry lawns,
burnt and that have not been watered in days.
I smile at them and they all smile back,
and my heart sings a little,
and I dance to its simple tune.

My heart sings and I dance too:
slowly melodies,
fast jigs,
rapid jazz and swing music
and waltzes to the chopin masterpieces,
and the romantic stories, novels, the poems,
that fancy your mind with its ryhme schemes,
and after I read such romantic beauty
I smile, and I listen closely to my heart,
and with every beat,
it lets out a verse or two, from a familiar song
that caught my ear on the radio,
and my heart sings
and I smile,
and the world smiles back.

Feeling such beauty
love and romance
it is such a good feeling to live with;
and as the night rolls on,
and the sun goes away
I sit at my desk
writing poetry,
with a cigarette slowly burning away with time,
and I am stuck,
getting drunk of red wine,
I sit back in my chair,
and listen to my heart,
and he sings alittle
and I can write again.
So, there we sit together,
writing poetry,
smoking cigarettes,
drinking wine
to the strike of nine
and we both sing songs of love and romance
together forever.


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A Hospital Stay - Part VII, Finis

                                                                    7.

                                                      On The Road Back

Serious illness instructs its victims
In the miracle of the normal life.
Spend time starting over on things you never think of,
And a new appreciation dawns
For the marvel of Being-in-the-World.

     Crisis finally ended, they move me down
     So I may eat like a human again and gain the strength
     To walk geriatrically about the ward
     Creepingly, yet exulting in my newfound freedom
     From the Sargasso Sea of lines that bound me for so long.
     Soon they would send me home
     To where Gulliver's god asserts his primacy.

There is in every life that question never asked aloud,
Yet waits for its whisper in misfortune's ear:
Why go on?

Why the trouble of going on
When we know all things, after all,
Make an end of themselves?
What purpose served when Summer's light gives way again
To Winter's dark, itself to give way once more 
Before the furious blooms of Spring,
This cycling of changes running blindly 'round
'Til all together, when at last we're called away from being
Will soon enough leave not even faint memory
That ever we, or they, had been?

Why go on,
When all are orphaned in the end,
When in due time Time itself will cease to march
When even God may wonder
To what end He set it all in motion for,
Leaving only an original Mystery
To occupy Forever?

     Yet still all things contrive to persevere, especially ourselves,
     Despite our cursed knowledge of Finality,
     Knowing that none shall escape eclipsion,
     But sensing that the weight
     Of whatever we have made of our lives
     Will add its dram of meaning
     When the sum of it all is balanced together
     In the great equation of existence.

We go on for the honor of going on,
Because there is no road back
And the bridges burn themselves behind us as we go.
The going is its own meaning
Because all moments matter to those they happen to,
Are defined by those they happen to -
And in the happening
Each soul makes its bright flash in the infinite dark,
Illumines itself in silent declaration
That it once was, and dared to be,
Despite the vanishing that follows.

     When all is said and over,
     It's perhaps best we measure ourselves
     Against the blazing stars and wheeling galaxies
     To find that we come out the larger 
     Than they in all their magnificence,
     In our tiny, burning brilliance.


Details | Free verse | |

Happy Cloud, Smoke Clouded Guy Vs Voice of Truth

My Friend Tom Logic was The Smoke-Clouded Guy and i was The Voice of Truth :D 


Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
Nicotine to make me high.. Emotions that can fly.. Pain about to die.. 
Voice of truth says:
A free-way pass to a venom which gives you a lack in living? Tell me why?
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
Tell you why? When from childhood life waved goodbye.. I had this numbing pain in my vein.. Living for vain
I had to
Smoke trouble away
Voice of truth says:
And risk Living? Risk a body that was gifted& pure, risk health? That others would die for? 
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
Why favor my life? Why live on the edge of the knife? Is happiness just another sad cloud? Can't u hear my screams that are loud?
If wounds wont mend.. Now with nicotine I will blend
Till they heal and lose the sense to feel
Voice of truth says:
To deny a blessing is nobler then? To deprive your health will numb the pain of this so-called Happy Cloud? Then this so-called Delight is just a fraud to make you feel better, to steal away the minutes while you would've got years
A lack of beauty you will gain, a reek of bad odor it will cause, your teeth no longer the blazing white? Why take instead of care? To your own shell? 
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
I feel my soul is down low
The sun.. Is your truth you state?
Voice of truth says:
A Message to God you have sent, "my Soul you grant, i will play" 
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
Now, after you.. I have smoking to hate
And.. I wish.. A better fate
Words crumble and blush by your power
Your words are the drug that is.. Truth
Voice of truth says:
Turn back you say? It is never late? For God has his arms open wide for another Fate 
And you know what I say? It’s your own good that we display?
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says:
I for one.. Turn my face, to what's bright.. This cloud circulating me.. Will fade away
Voice of truth says:
Welcome to this beautiful place, a ticket of health you will once regain :D 
Smoke-Clouded Guy Says: 
And it's you I thank... To my page.. I begin blank
Voice of truth says:
My regards, my awaits to all of your mistakes ;)


Details | Free verse | |

Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 5


Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 5

Anulom Vilom or The Science of Alternate Breathing


HOW TO DO IT

Take your right thumb on your right nostril and while pressing and closing it inhale a deep slow breath from your left nostril. Hold the breath for a second in the beginning and then open your right nostril so that you may exhale the air you have filled in your lungs. 
Now inhale deep and slow breath from the same nostril, where you have just exhaled (right nostril) and again hold it for a second and then exhale it from your left nostril. 
At the time of exhaling air from your right nostril press and stop your left nostril from the middle and ring fingers (Imp). Repeat this action from 1 minute in the beginning to 10 -15 minutes by doing it again and again as you had started earlier. Do this breathing practice from 1-3 minutes to 15 minutes to get the maximum benefits.



Step-5  How to do Anulom Vilom


Sit in Sukhasana or in Padmasana on a comfortable flat ground or on a Carpet or Durry. Start Anulom Vilom in the morning hours, when your  stomach is empty and clear . Close your eyes and sit as relaxed as possible for next 2-3 minutes, so that your muscles may get relaxed.


Anulom Vilom or (Alternate Breathing) Among all the breathing Exercises of Yoga Anulom Vilom shines Like a glittering jewel Where one sees The Astonishing results of Yoga Taking shapes like the Painting of an artist. Which only get appreciated The moment It began to show some Lines, figures and shapes And when the picture get filled with Colors You would only fall in love With the richness of Anulom Vilom’s Colors and shades Which remains The most precious gift of Yoga For all the human beings. It almost rejuvenates and transforms You Like the finished and colorful marvelous painting Of an artist From a dull and colorless shape. The wonderful effects of Anulom Vilom Will slowly purify your lungs Body and mind And many of human bodies Curse like ailments Like circulatory problems or Heart diseases Blood pressure problems and Blockages Depression and migraine pain Asthma, sinus and allergy. It is highly beneficial For those who suffers from stress and anxiety. Once you gain the time limit Or number of Anulom Vilom You will find yourself Blessed With a new personality Filled with energy and peace of mind And above all Love and kindness for all Which began to flow from your heart And helps you To accomplish your Tasks and talks With the grace of good health Endowed with the blessings of God. Regaining of good health By adopting Yoga Would become Your daily partner To Restore your love and confidence And your faith in Your God And it would make you More wanting and artful For you and your family and your life. Ravindra Kanpur India 28th July 2013
Important tips and precautions: -Anulom Vilom pranayama can be performed by any one of any age group. -Please perform this at calm and clean place either in a garden or at a place away from dust and pollution, and where there is a lot of oxygen. -The best time to practice this breathing exercise is considered to be early in the morning before having your breakfast. - However, performing Anulom Vilom should be avoided by pregnant women and during periods. -Persons having serious heart problems should not practice it without the guidance of a proper Guru or instructor. - Its benefits would be more visible, if you can practice it daily.
Gratitude- Although Anulom Vilom is the gift of ancient sages but it was brought to lime for the general good of the world by Swami Ram Deo of Patanjali Yog Peeth. Ravindra K Kapoor


Details | Free verse | |

Yoga in Poem A Novel Approach Step 3


VAJRASANA -   The Hardy Hose   STEP 3


POSTURE

Vajrasana is one of the few Asanas, which is suitable for all most everyone. It is perhaps one of the few Asana which is not difficult and can be adopted by anyone of any age group with little practice and patience. 

To start it just kneel on a ground (suitable for performing Yogic exercises as already advised earlier) when your knees, ankles and big toes are touching, while slightly moving your heels outwards and sit between the space of your heels and legs. 

If you feel any difficulty  in moving your heels outwards and your feet not touching the ground, then sit on high place or (It can be bed also in the beginning) cushioned platform and try to sit in between your heels,  while your feet are half hanging. Then gradually bring them fully on the platform after few sessions. 

Sit as erect as possible for you and keep your hands on your knees while looking straight. In the beginning sit from one minute to 5 or 10 minutes while keeping your eyes open and breathing slow and deep.




In Praise of Vajrasana Spine remains The foundation stone Of our health and healthy relations Regular practice of Vajrasana Serves like a tonic To strengthen Not only your spine But also all your vital organs On which depends Our relations and understandings And The love and pleasures of our life and It helps like giving bones to a boneless creature. The most significant Blessings of this wonderful Asana Is that Vajrasana Improves your confidence level It improves your vision and understanding While making you more tolerant And Benevolent Filled with love, sympathy And with the vital energy of life To Make the lives of your partner And of others Happy and beautiful. It removes spinal pains And Even it is beneficial in cases of Neuralgic headaches, sloth, stiffness. The most significant Blessing of this Asana is that It removes Anger, Anxiety Worry and Cowardice Fear and hesitation And even the weakness of organs It also helps in Reducing flatulence and improves Digestion. The most beautiful gift And blessings of Vajrasana Is the gift of Youth Which bestows on it followers When they practice it regularly Vajrasana prolongs Youth And postpones Old Age Even it gives its blessings to Heart patients As Vajrasana remains One of the few Asanas Which can be performed Even by advance Heart patients As well. Ravindra Kanpur India 13th July 2013 to continue…. NOTE: The findings are not mine. These details can be verified from the Books And Yogic Videos and lectures by Swami Ram Deo (In the last 10 years) and from the Book written by Pandit Shiv Sharma & Kailash Nath Sharma way back in 1973. URL for Vajrasana to see this pose is given as below: IMPORTANT NOTE:PLEASE FOLLOW ONLY THE FIRST TWO POSTURES AT THIS STAGE. https://www.google.co.in/search?q=Photo+Pose+of+Vajrasana&client=firefox-a&hs=Rck&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&channel=np&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=15DhUZCkOYXKrAf-jYCoDw&ved=0CCsQsAQ&biw=1024&bih=598


Details | Free verse | |

Regrets contest

I didn't go I broke my promise
my fault  those babies died  my fault the mothers cried.
When I qualified as a midwife a promise I made
promised my heart I would give them my time
to help the poor women get their lives back in line
all they face is pain and shame

The male leaders have  no compassion
terrible  conditions, no hospital or drugs no anything
just  men who think sex is theirs for the taking.
Leaving women with diseases and the babies they're making.
Once my health is back on form off I  will go
taking drugs with me to help the poor.

Everyone is poor they are without
without health without hope so desolate.
Might be just a ripple in an Ocean of hell
many a ripple would  surely tell
Until that day I live with my regrets
regrets that my life held  such consequences


Details | Free verse | |

Brain Surgery with a Pen

So I tried to laugh it off, told myself that it was fine
The blood stains on the ground help me feel alive
I look to you to end the nightmare with a happy dream
Before you made it, I fell to pieces, and I lost everything.
I don't know what hurts the most-
Knife in side or stone in throat,
All I know is that this room won't quit spinning.

I wake in blood
I wake in sweat
Is this my life?
Who's in my head?
I woke up bleeding
Tears from my eyes
I said I'm sorry
For using my life.

Wake me up blackness darkness.
Let me fester inside my mind.
Let this cancer grow to completion.
Put a choke-hold on the heart.
I can't lie that the knife went deep,
My pen cut deeper...


Details | Free verse | |

The Man With No Face

Hark!  It is he!
A slate face; devoid!
Mechanical, computing, sleepless.

No! Just human!
Turning, just turning!
He will not fall, now expressionless.

The dark gazeth!
Yet, he wont gaze back!
Four days, sleepless, faceless, for all!

His face is stone.
No care, there's no care!
Persist amidst all of the loss.

It is but he!
No! Tireless;
designed to be.
It is but he!

Shrug the abyss,
he will nev'r fail;
a perfection, 
designed to be. 
Shrug the abyss.

Through it all,
he leaveth none for all!
To see the end of it all,
the completion of it all!
None but all.

Four days sleepless,
it is none but he!
Faceless, breathless, mechanized.

Look! See him now!
With bags under eyes.
See him now, the man with no face.

It is he,
Be it so! Be it so!
To see the end of it;
the destruction of it all!
It is he.


Details | Free verse | |

Tortured body

Night time rest
I lie there counting the stars
as they glint in the Heavens
Desperate to sleep
exhausted tears streak streams
from cheek to pillow
Not that I feel sorry for myself
just simply worn out
in need of short respite
Scared to try to move
as nightly rigamortis sets in
but need is there to move
to free the stiffness
work through extreme pain
to break the grip 
of thise imprisoned bones
to free the body
and bring short relief
that I might make routine bathroom trip
before it is too late
and further humiliation takes hold
Once I can bend and straighten legs freely
I can shuffle around suffice to sit
then reassure myself 
just enough to feel able to cope
To push and put one foot in front of the other
Force this swollen crumbling body beyond the pain
required to move from sitting to standing
to start to brave the world once more
So I can live life to its fullest
The calm tends to come after the storm
but the peace that follows can be short lived
never knowing when the winds direction will turn on its heal
bringing tornados and lightening strikes
to rack tortures torment through my spine and legs
where this disabling degenerative disease desires domination
Red lipstick disguise fools those around me
They don't see me during these difficult times
the occasions I let only those closest to me near
Times I become almost totally reliant
Like so many mornings when I've no choice 
but grapple between the raise bar
and my husbands strong arm
to standing stooped position
Flattened hands search the fronts of wardrobe doors 
sliding upwards as I straighten up 
taking crutches one in each hand 
I prop myself strongly
then carefully I step slowly
and with each  movement new release
begins to fall fresh upon me
for but short time
until the hours play same record over
or the devils bow plays fiddle 
with the nerves in my body for encore


Details | Free verse | |

Fluorescent Wasteland

salt flats
stretch for miles
in grocery stores
chip isle, frozen foods
seven and thirteen, respectively
reflect their shine
of white light
enticement

all organisms dried up,
fifteen per cent more, but lacking
in this pre-packaged
wasteland
where nothing ever grows
or dares to walk without
a list to double check.


Details | Free verse | |

Destiny's Swim

Destiny ran into my room today
"Grandmother, we had such fun
Swimming and playing in the sun"
Her hair a wavy asterisk
Her lips expounding joy
The burnished bronze of her
suntan
The skip in her walk
I relished her swimming pool 
fun and her commitment
to laugh
so simply felt
I saw myself in her decades gone
and then I burned her joy in my eyes
and cherished that she came to
me to share her moment's delight


Details | Free verse | |

Theme of birds

On the theme of birds that flutter and fly
I’d free my flock of dreams to swarm the sky
Blind to both cage and fetter
-blinded by sun and freedom of feather


Details | Free verse | |

Better paint a smile

Another tough to face morning
I gaze into the mirror
Palored cheeks
Clammy beaten brow
Dark circled tired eyes
Pin pricked pupils peer back
Medicated erupting skin
Drained tightly pursed lips
I know today I'd better paint a smile
Instill the motto to do what I can
When and however that may be
To try new things
Embrace all and use it to my advantage
To overcome adversity
Making a positive difference
To my own life 
And those around me
For it is those small mercies
That make such a difference daily


Details | Free verse | |

Pride and Predators

Even predators have mothers
and with the soft mewling eyes of infancy
they search, search for the breast of mother
the beak, the tooth, the talon, the claw…
Children worldwide hunger.
The small weak voices and stone dead eyes calling out
to those who have…
Mothers making stone soup.
Mothers giving of their own body the last
remnants of harsh life as the haves
go on safari’s or to zoos to
feed the animals.


Details | Free verse | |

Insomnia

Insomnia; a sly sprite inhibiting
the subconscious making it freeze
in mid-motion.
Stillness of the day regardless of
time the mind struggles to release
itself from the clutches of the
scaly paws of the sprite itself.
It seems to marvel and laugh at 
the expense of one’s suffering
and desperate attempts to succumb
to sleep.
It is taken for granted by many,
like most things that are expected
to be of normality.
Time passes creating a deep void that
fills with anger, annoyance and jealousy;
destructive essence trapped within a glass
bottle, like some sort of obscene concoction
in a chemistry set ready to explode in 
anyone’s face creating a comical effect
that mocks the true feelings of one’s 
immediate pain and dismal reflection;
dank and dreary. 
Insomnia is a frame of mind that never
settles in to calm projections of life;
always in replay and rewind.
Sleep is precious, it enables the
body to recharge and without it
one slowly sinks in to a pool
of everlasting despair and 
loneliness without hope of
being released from the scaly 
paws that tighten their grasp
with every toss and turn.


Details | Free verse | |

Invicible Exist

Let us journey 
In side unknown world 
Invincible people 
An entry 
Without exists
Narrow passage 
Decaying rose 
Gambler of life
Is there a way out ?

Riding in tunnel of life 
From spirituality 
To Disability 
Causalities
Wise word of maturity 

My blood 
Your veins 
To live in duality 

Resting and wave 
Floating Angels
Grips my hands 
Speck of light 
In this immortality

15/05/11
If this a poem then am dreamin 


Details | Free verse | |

On bended knee

On bended knee
I hope you know
Of how much I feel
my heart bestow

For now I offer
my hand my love
a golden band 
and pure white doves

Perhaps you'll arrive
in princess carriage
what ever you want 
the perfect marriage

Through happiness
and sickness too
I've one true love
and that is you

So if you'll say yes
and marry me
through all my days
I'll cherish thee


Details | Free verse | |

The Hunger Game

Ana's taught me to count
not in numbers but calories
with a yolk-yellow calorie handbook.
The calories pulse with a heartbeat.
They are not dead and number-flat;
they whisper and breathe, real and alive.
A pebble-heavy potato = 105.

She's grey-gaunt, spinning herself thin,
this mirror woman staring back at me,
anaemic-pale and flower-frail.
But fat silently seeps, oozes greasily
beneath jutting hipbones, contaminating,
expanding like some monstrous child.

Consumed by the rituals of chew-and-spit -
food without guilt and regret, no threat,
no unctuous slippage of calories down the throat.
But hunger escapes from the body's bone-cage;
my tongue tingles for texture and taste,
craves chocolate's dark velvet melt.
"Eat," my body pleads.
"Resist." Ana stabs my ear with a knife twist.
Eat. Resist. Eat. Resist. Eat. Resist.

The fading scar on my left wrist
where I tried to cut out calories
is the silvering slash of a grin.
And Ana's still smirking, skewing reality,
sneering "You'll never cut yourself free from me."

3 a.m., bloating in the bathroom's mirror-bright gaze,
one pound gained; the scale's needle
jabs hard into catastrophe's red haze.
Ana's on her knees beside the toilet, guilt-goading me,
forcing unforgiving fingers down my throat.

Cardiac arrhythmia.
My heart flutters like a flickering bulb,
stutters like my tongue
searching for words to voice a lie.
Ana tightens the puppet strings,
pulls my marionette mouth
into shapes that say: "I'm not hungry."
"I've already eaten today."
Her voice is snake-hissy
slithering into my ear:
"How many calories? How many calories?"
Insistent, scratching my bone china mind,
screeching like nails down a windowpane.

Drifting dizzily through pangs and pains,
giddy with the headiness starvation brings,
air-light and feather-floaty.
My thoughts could take off like birds.

Always cold.
The Arctic gusts in
and I'm blown to bone.
My arms are winter branch brittle;
wrists could snap with one tap.
I wobble on frangible twigs
that barely pass for legs.

Ketosis: a sour-apple smell
clinging acidic on breath and skin.
Hair strands are falling: spiderweb threads,
wisps and glints of coppery red;
autumn filaments floating off into empty space...

Drip. Drip.
I'm tubed and taped -
the needling invasion like soul rape.
A fattening elixir
of nutrients and glucose is cannula-fed
into my winter-blue veins.

Ana's jabbering on the end of the bed,
swinging matchstick legs,
her bone-brittle voice word-jabbing me:
disgusting, pathetic, obese.
They've stuffed me with prozac,
fed me diazepam,
in a desperate bid to turn her volume down.

Gauzy morning, a hollow dawning:
I must play the hunger game,
consume just enough to gain.
Discharged, I'll count my days
not in numbers but calories,
guilt-grubby and grubbing
for the killing crumbs,
spinning myself thinner
till Ana frees or kills me.


Details | Free verse | |

SKY

Dependency is an extreme sort of malaise.
Its intensifications are seen in awkward ways.
You see yourself as an incurable disease.
However, once the means disappear, you become at ease.
Estranged from your normal world, you shout-out saliently to be heard.
Done in the calmest way, your expression removes disenchantment.

Hugs you give.
Afflictions ebb diminishing the tide.
You smile and begin to feel the importance of life.

Prescribe the drug to others.
Tell them how you overcame your troubles through this remedy.
The pain that you killed was done via Poetry Therapy.
Let one know the heights you peaked.
Pedestals you formed.
Share those as well and state they are there for anyone to summit.

Apex 
Reach your highpoint
Zenith
Top
Pinnacle
Do not stop 
Level to the afar
The limit is there.
SKY
____________________________________________________________/
Sponsor:   	        Giorgio A. V.
Contest Name: 	Impress me with a small poem IV ! 
User Name: Verlena S. Walker
Nom De Plume: Oblivion Dark Sunshine
Motif: Empower/Amour-Proper/Motivational/Inspirational


Details | Free verse | |

We Call Them Unclean

stuffed critters line the dashboard
of the V-dub he takes every day
to visit her where she rests
his bent fingers pluck strings
serenade

little princess sightless
except for shadows, sees
the cloudless day and beams
the brightest crooked-smile 
gratitude 

feisty one drives big truck
one leg to pump the pedals
which one, the gas of course!
while she dreams of evenings 
dancing

bike pedals turning, churning
on his daily fitness route 
he ventured out, not accepted
came home to lead
belonging

rubber boots, wide-brimmed hat
hands toil earth creating beauty
short strong arms set nets 
He reaps ocean's bounty through
serenity


*the unmentionable word of all time – leprosy.  The stigma still exists for those who have long been rid of Hansen's Disease.  The only unclean thing is the heart of mankind. 
Dedicated to all those who have honored and touched my heart on Molokaí.


Details | Free verse | |

Battling Addiction

Oh Methuselah, here you are again

With Methuselah in your hand hold tight to your chest

Yesterday you were wheeled down to your abode down the ghetto

By some good fellows walking by

After soaking yourself in an ocean of gin

Oh Methuselah, it’s not too late to repent

Deny Methuselah today and live a purposeful life tomorrow

Methuselah, aren’t you aware you are to live long

But have chosen to live a shortened life

Let that bottle full of wine go, let Methuselah go

And take control of your life once again


Details | Free verse | |

Politics of Health - WIN

Politics of health

On issues like Gay marriage, Medical marijuana or assisted suicide, Will of the people goes out the window. They argue, one can act normally when high Pot-smoking makes you unmotivated, a lie!!!! They have their own axes to grind. We come across another type of people who argue There are better medications than Marijuana Less damaging health to relieve pain Much better treatment for pain Marijuana is not a drug But an herb and a flower God put it here to grow No right to say God is wrong They have their own breads to butter. Yet another majority of people who barb Roll it. Light it. Inhale it. Hold it. They have their own amusements to rejoice.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 2-12-14 Dr. Ram Mehta Form: Free Verse Second Place Win Contest: What annoys you by Frank H.


Details | Free verse | |

In My Community

Our Ancestors fought to the death,
Just so we can live a brighter day,
So before you light up that blunt of meth,
Think about what you’re giving away,
It was a glad day in history when Obama rose to victory,
The first black president was all we knew,
Dark skin is in!
Haven’t you heard?
That even in our community, 
You can get burned,
It’s a sad day when people would rather stay home and “Crank That Amber Cole”,
Than get up and run to a poll,
In our community,
Rockin’ Luis V is better than having a college degree,
And teen pregnancy is not only a trend,
But the single motherhood that follows should end,
Young girls learn of a wonderful prince to take them away,
Nothing should change thought their mothers prince didn’t stay,
And as the tears fade away,
She grows stronger every day,
In our community,
Fighting is no longer a word,
You argue with someone and shots are heard,
Girls showing places the sun don’t show,
So how do they expect the community to grow?
Where love is a figment of imagination,
Making a young child question her creation,
Young mothers would rather buy the iPhone 5,
Then satisfy her baby’s cries,
While her new man’s eye,
Wander up another girl’s thighs,
In our community,
Where #team dark skin vs #team light skin,
Makes others not love the skin they’re in,
Love, lust, hate, and trust,
Giving a rose on Valentine’s Day is no longer a must, 
Where bad is good and good is bad,
Who would think to see their grandmother sad?
Her hurt and pain,
Shows how our community has lost everything her parents fought to gain.


Details | Free verse | |

Freedom in Love

Keeping my head up, treading water
Cut throat surviving, struggling
Going under, death visits
Will to live, tested!
Selfishness Vs Selflessness
A Greater Love, encompasses me
God demonstrating mercy, for his children
Learning about forgiveness, cultivating, inner faith
Melody of Love, one can experience
In the darkest, waking hours, of everyday living
Self survival, learning how to live
Peace of Mind, Peace of Heart
Peaceful Spirit, Freedom in Love


Details | Free verse | |

God's Temple

I undress myself,
look in the mirror,
and question...
What have I done to God's temple?
Self -inflicted scars,
my unhealthy ways,
causing my heart to beat fast,
each breath to ache.
I look towards the sky,
only God sees it in my eyes,
he knows I despise what I have done to His temple.
I try so hard,
to be stronger than what I am,
but God truly sees,
I am weak as a lamb.
He knows that I mourn how I have treated His temple.
I fall on my knees,
and pray dear God please,
give me strength to renew,
rebuild,
love what he has given me,
and forgive me for destroying His temple.


Details | Free verse | |

Remains Of A Driveway

Through you I seek to know:
What happened once below?

You ferns of resistance, I see you
Mixing it upward with 
A firm stance. 
(Such steely green weeds
Do smirk indeed
Above the empty path of horizon’s eye,
Blackened to nowhere).

What, though, do I see in you?

(A path lies vacant and wanting,
A land once named upon a dream;
A barren place now daunting,
Neglected and unseen).

Where is your truth?

(Does it rest within your clumsy bud’s dance
With a tertiary sky,
Or a raucous from your stem’s windward need 
To lead)?

Oh No.

I do believe:
It is your roots of defiance!

To know Home in no shame;
To forge through scarred soil with no blame!

Such courage you have:
To reap the shifting tar of fickle men, 
And safely hasten away 
From the notion of never again!

(Thirty some years have stood and fell
Yet…
Your quiet presence lives to tell
This hell,
Once known,
As Love’s canal).  

Oh eager green,
 I wish you well.


Details | Free verse | |

Winter Beach

After the rain, 
the speckled glint of shimmering sand
is now muddy brown.
Like a blind, closed tight on the warmth of summer,
the winter beach has shrunken in,
changing the colours of my day into
a darker palette, shades of grey.
The sun shriveled
pale faced and worn
as the cold season begins.

Seagulls a beacon
against a slate November sky
their sound, comfort to a lonely beach.
The steps down to the water, pea green,
slimy weed on stone
bright against an ink-rippled tide.

Seaweed colours bleed into my mind while
textures playfully mingle.
The salt air stings my nostrils
caresses my lungs with wellness.
Sea sounds carry from the shores of Wales
as I crunch the length of the ebbing milk tide.

I look to the horizon and imagine another me
walking a beach somewhere over there,
listening to my thoughts, 
as they channel the sea
Grateful for this beauty, the gift of the nature
I look over my shoulder, my footprints remain
solid, as in a freshly cemented path
their sound, echoes in the shells.


Details | Free verse | |

Don't Wanna Claim It

Dang heart flutters, clutching at me...
little hard to catch my breath, these days
been running hard, feeling like I done gone
and run the marathon without training
They trying to tell me ... That I'm
Under the weather again... humpf.
They are telling me 
of all people -- to take it easy...
they don't know me to well, do they ~
Never been much on complaining...
that takes too much energy...
Although it seems that
My body is a wee bit tired lately,
needing a little rest that's all...  
too tell the truth
I ain't 'bout ta claim nobody's illness
Not today nor any t'other
I'm standing here for the third time
they say three's a charm... hey--hey Now!
Fat lady sing if you must,  but just you know
I ain't going no where, shoot, if the tune be right...
I might just sang along with you... 
play me that song sweet music man ~
Tell 'em all I'm still striving to do the best I can...
See I got a whole lot more living to do
and I ain't gonna claim that ticket, 
 No, I don't wanna cash it all in -- just yet...


Details | Free verse | |

A Pill For This A Pill For That

A pill for this
A pill for that
A pill for your pet armadillo
dog or Rat.

A pill to make you sleep
A pill to wake you up
Drunk with water
from a glass or a cup.

A pill to take you up
a pill to take you down
A pill to chase away the blues
and make a smile from a thrown.

A pill to reverse the side effects of a pill
A pill for Humpty Dumpty
Tom Thumb and Jack and Jill.

A pill to make you virile
A pill for a aching head
One for the husband
the other for the unreceptive wife in bed.

A pill for swamp fever hemerodes and gout
A pill that you put where the sun don't shine
another for your mouth,

Pink yellow green and blue
even if you don't need to take them
there is a pill for you.

Shake me up I'd rattle
I gave more chemicals in me than blood
But still the Doctors swear their doin me good.

The Pharmaceutical and their shareholders
rub their greedy hands
and live in exotic lands.

A pill to make you younger
A pill to make you-

'' Live forever''!!!

      Never.



Peter Dome.copyright.2014. Jan


Details | Free verse | |

Surgical Blue

That mad doctor wants to rip me open, head to toe, I just know it!

His scalpel is sharpened and hungry for a slice of flesh; it thirsts for blood.

"Just a 'nick'", he tries to soothe, cooing me as the chemicals combine to knock me out cold.

No nip, no tuck- just all out butchery!

He'll slice me and dice me with the sadistic pleasure only a surgeon understands!
Or "Jack the Ripper", perchance.

Getting so sleepy...so drowsy and sedated; I can't fight back.

The massacre is imminent. The scalpel shines brilliantly under the surgical lights.
Everyone is wearing surgical blue costumes, pretending to be nurses.
They look so macabre, with those surgical masks...or are they the kind of
masks one wears to a fancy costume party?

In my woozy state, I cannot tell anymore. I imagine them smiling beneath those masks-
large, gaping, toothy smiles, like the ones you see on crocodiles. They're all soaking in the preoperative excitement, the kind of excitement between first-time lovers as they undress not nearly quickly enough, wildly anticipating the impending debauchery with anxious delight.

My eyes are getting heavier and all I hear are the beeps of machines and garbled medical nomenclature...or are they instructions on how to properly eviscerate me?

"Are you ready, nurse?"
"Yes, doctor."
"Get my gloves ready."
"Here, doctor."
"Nurse, apply the iodine."
"Ready, doctor."
"Scalpel..."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*having an outpatient surgical procedure today and am channeling my anxiety lol*


Details | Free verse | |

''Athlete''

 Presence of fused endurance.
 Fueled by your strength.
 The break of sweat brought on by diverse motion.
 Course of steady breathe.
 Elevated throbbing muscles ignite.
 Flaccid no more.
 Stress free tranquil mind.
 Gratification sets on this well deserved athlete.
 As to wait for dawn to wake me another day.


Details | Free verse | |

Alcoholism

Alcoholism, the pariah
feeding on the collapse
of self-control 
befuddling the brain's sensibility;
transforming intelligence
into ridicule.


Details | Free verse | |

NEWS SO GOOD


Oh my delicate Mother, with zest, stood up from the wheelchair then began tapping dance steps under new moon rising. Like a floating butterfly guided by notes of a theme song, hands trailed away around the room, while she gracefully led her pace. And thirty roses decked a love-couch enlivening cheeks reddened by bliss, while her feet regaled in eased motion unmindful of trickling heartbeat. We gazed at Mom, awed by surged vim lovely in a crimson dress billowing, as joyous Dad grasped her for a slow waltz highlighting their fateful pearl anniversary. Mystic Rose’s The Good News Paper by nette onclaud 11/ 14/2014


Details | Free verse | |

Phoenix immortal

Mass of red and gold plumage
blood of supreme incessant immortality flows within
Only I alone can reign stronger
a fortiori
than the army of any man or beast
Symbolic of Christ, ressurection, afterlife
In death redeemed
consumed by fire
only to be born again of ashes
I will rise up again!

Injured from mortals wars 
I simply ameliorate and regenerate
I am fire and divinty
Continually watching the irresolute
ever changing, dynamic world around me
In despair I scrutinize and contemplate 
as all things moral 
are taken from me periodically and adinfinitum
lost ever and again

Armys of mortals have chased my blood for an age
in want of my immortality
Whilst they wrangle with continual want
and I would content for less
I have met no immortal contender
my glorification to you either unobtainable 
or a terrible curse
As a deity I serve this planet in all my supremacy
for I will foresee you all




Authors note

This piece was originally written as a two part collaborative effort with poet Kathleen C. 
Mannon, otherwise known by pen name kkatie55 . The prompt we were given to write to for 
contest was Mortal vs. Immortal in September of 2007, a month after I first started writing I 
believe. To begin with we both took our ideas and wrote individually then bringing our ideas 
together and changing slightly to fit from there… I tried to write so this would stand alone 
too, and have only just decided to bring it out to share for opinion. To see the write with the 
omitted verses written by the other poet, please feel free to go view at this link where each 
poet has initialled over their respective stanzas/verses. 
http://allpoetry.com/poem/3404940
Thankyou for your trouble in reading this explanation, but I do not wish to discredit its 
original intention nor take anything away from the other poet by placing this half here. I 
hope you shall be excited about reading it in full…


Details | Free verse | |

He Used To Be

He used to hunt and fish
Shoot the bull with ease
But now he has Huntington's Disease

He could cut a right of way
For the Rural Electric Company
With chain saw and saw blade
Now he can't even feed himself
For he has Huntington's Disease

He advanced up to line-man
Learning all about electric power
Going to work handling high voltage by the hour
Now he can hardly walk down the street
For he has Huntington's Chorea

He is at times a danger to himself
At times to people he meets
But is not right for he has H.D.

Sad but true it is inherited
If one has too many CAG's repeats
On their DNA they will come down with H.D.


Details | Free verse | |

There's A New Day Coming (Repost)

Morning rays unfolding
like fingers formed 
Trace the far-reaching dreams
To awaken the sleeping children
To recognize the dawn 
Of the new world

There were promises made 
that shall not be broken
Rest assured 
That there's going to be 
Some major changes made

Weeping and mourning 
Will be no more ...
Pain and sickness 
Will cease to exist...
No famine in the lands
Feeble minds will be 
Granted wisdom from above

This is for the betterment of mankind
So, rest assured dear friends 
Believe me when I tell you 
There’s a new day coming.


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He has
          become his past

                 which time has replayed
                                                     to his surprise
                                                                               
 as a comedy of errors...
                                             filled with sadness
                                   irony
                        and
           mirth


Details | Free verse | |

To live, flightless birds

A single branch, clawed and pecked, fickle and straining,
Lonely Nestling and father, paw and peck at their home
Lonely branch, spasms in the wind
Nestling and father paw and peck, yearn and whimper
These Flightless Birds, on a fickle branch

Young nestling skitters to the branch’s edge
Peers over on to sightless depths
Shivers, ruffles withered feathers
Spreads tousled wings
And loosens fast aging down
Stretches till overgrown talons graze the edge
Like endless days before, Craning aching neck 
Eyes devouring the scene with a famished hunger-
And whimpers
Turns to father and warbles in longing,
A sight that speaks of flight
Dreams of swimming amidst the clouds
To leave
-slightest breeze carries words...   
to live

The father, neck cramped, tilted, eyes swivelling to and fro
Cooing and cawing, talons pawing
A slight breeze, decrepit feathers hauled away in swarms
A forlorn sight that reeks of abandoned dreams 

Warbling, cooing and cawing, pleading and pawing
Pecking in apprehension, neck swivelling to and fro in exasperation
“To leave father! To stretch my wings
Lift from them the smell of rot and loss
To fly father”

“To fall! To fall, and to die!”

-Wind whispers,
To fall, to soar, and to live
Nestling shuffles to the edge, 
Settles down amidst aching joints and a teetering ledge
Peers down onto sightless depths
-they bellow to him
To fall, to fly, to Die!
Fall and flutter amidst a shower of feathers
Cramping wings crooked and futile
To swirl into freedom carried by the stench of inevitability
To fall, to fly, to die
Little Nestling whimpers, nothing so glorious about death
nothing so glorious without flight...

Whimpers, shuffles forward, talons pricking oblivion
Ruffles feathers, settles down
Nestling wavers, branch bending
Rotting down tickles his beak, claws dig deeper into branch
Eyes feasting on sightless depths
Endless fears...
They scream to him
To sit, to dream to fly...
To sit, to dream of revitalized wings
Stretching across the sky, an unveiling of freedom
The shattering of chains every morning, with a stretch of wings
The exercise of freedom
to sit and dream
to live

to sit at the edge of that tottering branch
creaking and bending under a restless and aging body
peering over into the sky, where fickle wings will not go
and with dreams, with dreams lift off this branch
and fly, where body cannot
and live


Details | Free verse | |

Mama

Skeletal,
shriveled,
your shell's a delicate, dry
and brittle casing,
soon shed.
Now,
age accumulates and,
exiled and bewildered --
all free choice fled --
death's an unknown terror.
You miss your home,
cannot understand how,
to those who once bent to your will,
you've faded to a shadow,
powerless, almost forgot,
a consequence of the natural order.
Enjoy the moments in the sun,
your food, your precious life's breath
that I listen for at night.
I cling, and mourn your life --
so changed.
Your stroke
has paralyzed us both...
my pity, cloaked in love,
is but another grievous wound
you bear.


Details | Free verse | |

A Prayer for Michael

A Prayer for Michael (the one who sent me here)

I said a prayer and called your name
It was a prayer for you
You are my friend
I called your name with tears 
My eyes are rivers in your grace
I cannot see the bottom of this pit
Upon whose rim you stand
But I release you from the wretched place
I break your spell and kill your witch with my golden cold spike of love

I have no tools
My ways are simple
But I throw them over to you with every inch of strength you have given me
I only have a small closed heart that’s broken
But it wishes to be strong and large
Like you can be too
Like you were as a child of light
Like you are still, but only blinded and stunned
You are like a brother and father and guide to me
In one stroke of kindness you gave me hope
My broken heart holds magic 
It knows your pain
And in its lock a golden broken key of love you turned
You made me stronger
And like a starfish
Now I have a thousand keys forming to give away

I offer one to you my new friend
My love is yours to use and keep
Hold it in your heart
Be warm
I pledge my friendship
In the times your heart is cold and lonely
Drink to me the cup you throw away
Remember I will keep you warm inside of me
Your memory will not fade, I know your name
Take strength in knowing those you heal
Demand of you as well that you should rise again

Rise and take your place
Stand in recognition of what you must be and are even now
Walk forward again in the light of your own making
Have half the hope you have given
Rekindle it 
You have no shame
And no wrong did you make
It was right to love so freely 
With such pure honesty and trust and lust
No matter that anyone should hurt you
This was only a test and strengthening
Use the hurt to remember your mission
Let its fading embers grow warm again and not fester
Fuel that fire with the wind of your desire to heal
And love again without restraint
As you know you always will and must
I release you from the spell
No fear is yours to bear
Stand up and walk out of those old shoes
In health, without fear, I set you free


Details | Free verse | |

The Rebellious Teen

The rebellious Teen loved all his friends. 
The only ones he listened to… were them.
They wanted him to drink and smoke every night. 
They said experimenting with drugs was definitely all right.

The rebellious teen’s mom was beside herself… 
This was her child and this could finish his life.
But he continued to listen to the Devil himself.
What could she do in the end to save his life?

The devilish friends held him closely in the palm of his hand…
In the end she decided she had to move far away from them.
Somewhere… where only new friends he could find.
Those who loved life, sports, and learning: to draw him back in.

Then every so often she let him, for a visit, to go back…
Each time he went, fewer were left to contact, yes, some were even dead.
Some had over dosed… Some didn’t care who he was any more.
What he found was rot and that they lacked the drive to live.

The rebellious teen cried for what he saw they had become…
He had changed and now could see, what was happening to them…
These were no longer the friends that he remembered from before.
He tried to save them with words and his love… but they didn’t care.

He didn’t want to go back to that sadness, to live ever again… 
Now he looked to the future and that was a fact.
The moral I tell you, all of my friends…if he won’t listen to you… 
Then find him new friends.

For if he is your life and if you want him to live…
Find others to help steer him or else you can’t win…
Let his support group be new peers who enjoy life to the brim.
Yes, those who will help lead him to walk in the light again.

From a true experience…


Details | Free verse | |

The True Beauty of the Butterfly

Imagine being so 
compelled by circumstance 
that you must wrap yourself in a tight cocoon 
of your own making
just to survive. 

Surrendering your life,
as you know it, to some unknown
future form that you cannot see because
your mind is blank and your body 
is eating itself alive. 

Until enough time passes,
in isolation, that all your cells 
have turned themselves inside out 
and been altered into an alien
gossamer shape.

Feeling trapped by  
the silken shell you have woven 
around yourself, you chafe against your confines
with your newly winged being,
slowly breaking through. 

Surviving 
your extreme makeover,
you carefully unfurl your shimmering sails, waiting 
until you are strong enough 
to catch the wind.


Details | Free verse | |

Mall Walking

Like fruitless wanderers,
mall walkers slap their feet
in a rhythm
that goes nowhere.
Only round and round,
past mega-bucks sales;
pet store puppy mill reject dogs,
a merry-go-round for elderly exercisers.
Fitness for arthritic window shoppers.
Fashion pants do beckon,
'come forth and sally
ye nomads of the modern world.'


Details | Free verse | |

Agony!

With sharpened axe you splice and splice again
Repeatedly you strike
Should I forget your name
You take a rest and burn and ache and swell
Until old familiar returns to bring me Hell
You rage in Devils angry fire
Keep me awake 
I can not sleep through depth of mire
You drill with pressure, 
push, pummel and pull
You drag, drain and dull -
to peace - short while
Praise be!  Amen!...
but not for long...
with wrong move 
or slight of weather
start over again...


Details | Free verse | |

Naked holes.

Imagine a life without holes.
An unstable world,a round figure of nothing.
A straight line,smells like ptomaine.
Holes are everywhere,white and black,
polychromatic,pretty and ugly.
Holes that you may fill,other you may not.
They can think,memorize,imagine.
Emotional holes,logical,positional,
in a chessboard,a second before a knight arrives.
Holes in my body,in your body,his or her,
screaming for pleasure,with or without morals.
Living there,breathe,judge the way you treat them.
A hole can kill you,can make you suffer.
They are in brains,in hearts.
In great losses.
When out of nowhere they are born,proud,
captivated eventually,died full of years.
Significant holes,in maps,in history.
They feed on hopes,feelings,aspirations,
organic,inorganic matters.
Holes reborn,only looked at us.
Naked.


Details | Free verse | |

Pills

Now when I was a young man 
I didn’t need pills everything worked
I wasn’t a fan 

But now that I'm old 
I need pills everyday 
One to lower my blood pressure 
Another to keep the cholesterol away 

Now I have a new one 
To keep my mind straight 
And because of this 
I can’t ejaculate 

It’s good for an old man to stay hard for so long 
But even for that 
I need a pill for that schlong

I wonder whats next in the pill world for me 
Maybe a pill 
So I can pee 

They gave me holder to keep my pills all arranged 
But keeping them straight 
Is making me deranged 

I need a pill to tell me what pill and when 
Because for the life of me 
I forget now and then 

I can’t tell the difference between the colors of each  
If I take the wrong one 
I have a hard on and no speech 

Now all these little pills 
Cost a pile of bills 
Which causes me 
Lots of stress and ill 

No more pills thank you 
I’ve had my fill 

Eric (and always will be)  
 


Details | Free verse | |

My Mama

My Mama she trips out in the moon light
when I’m safely tucked up in bed
she dresses to wow her audience
but I know not of her occupation
when I ask I am greeted by silence
and then “You will understand when you grow up”

My Mama she returns at break of day
before the curtains begin to twitch or draw
she’ll come in exhausted and fix my breakfast
then checking in on me she’ll wake me for school
before she goes off to bed – she’ll see me later
to ask about my day and play

A Mamas kiss, a smile, a hug, warmth, food and a roof
Yet when we go out together people turn 
to talk to one another, quietly nodding
Funny looks are cast our way and yet not one shall speak to us
Aged nine in school I find out why 
when another child will laugh

“Ya Mama works the streets
lies on her back, watches the sky – to feed ya
-Tis what my Ma said”
It makes me cry
I love my Mama
but this shame hurts

I want to die…


Details | Free verse | |

No Nice Days

“Get some rest and we’ll have a nice day,”
he said, not understanding
how trapped I feel by the cocoon of illness 
I am only just beginning to emerge from.

Unaware of how freely he moves
through the world, like a butterfly
flitting and fluttering from leaf to leaf
on the breeze of a whim,

…He doesn’t see that like 
the newly winged caterpillar struggling 
to break through the silken shell it has woven 
around itself, I too am chafing against my confines.

…He doesn’t see that before
I can trust my still fragile body,
I must inch my way out of my old skin
and slowly unfurl my wings.  

He doesn’t see that even though
I am longing to be free, until 
I, too, can fly on the breeze of a whim
there are no nice days.


Details | Free verse | |

Praising Mother

Our beautiful mother,
Who gave birth to us,
Nurtured us and raised us,
With loving care,
Our companion all our lives,
Father's beautiful wife, 
Friend through calm and controversy,
A miracle of kindness,
Taught us right from wrong,
With us during our married years,
Grandmother and great-grandmother, 
Godly and religious,
Looking after all her children,
Loved and respected by us all,
I remember her whimsical sense of humour,
She had the patience that passeth understanding,
A tribute to all mothers on this special day,
Happy Mother's Day and God bless you.

Author:Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

A Chance Encounter

A Chance Encounter A chance encounter the other day Got me chatting to a stranger Just for some time to pass away. He was very well groomed, very smart. Spoke well too, seemed a decent sort. I told him a little tale I had learned whilst at work. Outside a building that’s up for sale Close to the centre of the town A queue of people gathered. Old clothes, hand me downs. Inside people of good heart and souls Were behind tables long. And a kind of soup was poured into bowls. A slice of bread was added to each one poured. As the hungry-eyed came through the door. As each one passed a thank you was heard. Grateful for the meal today. A simple reply least we can do. All was silent no complaints from the poor. Till a young voice said, ‘Please Mummy I want more.’ I sat back in my chair waiting for a reply. The guy opposite gave a big sigh. He said, ‘Things were tough in those days Very hard for the poor in the Victorian Age. They were ignored, did not count, How could others treat them like that?’ No-one should be without the means I say, To feed and clothe their children today. I looked at him and shook my head. My dear friend you misunderstand The tale was not yesteryear or a foreign land. I visited a local food bank the day before last. And like you I was taken aback. Unless with my eyes I had seen, The myth about scroungers I would still believe. Some get the dregs, others get the cream. This is Great Britain in 2013. But the people of our Nation are strong In times of strife they speak as one. ‘We are mighty as Caesar, mighty as Rome.’ ‘ NI CARBORUNDUM BASTARDORUM’


Details | Free verse | |

Cold ice

Ice flower
so cold I cannot touch
but need forces my exposed finger tips
and i brush them against your crystal petals
and bitten skin comes off willingly
to cling to your cold disregard;

Ice flower
frozen as you are
even this hot desert wind
seeking to slice your bitter air
and melt away droplets of beauty
from your seductive petals
but oh seduction and its lure:
my hot breath comes fervent and warm
but I do not draw back into my lungs cool favor
No, your crystal buds do not yield fresh melt water
to sate this parched throat

No, my breath comes back short, sharp and shivering
As if the unforgiving hand of winter
had battered my very heart away
and the cold wind gusts back into my lungs
and shrouds my heart
slows the pumping of heated blood
and leaves only a brittle casing
of cold ice.


Details | Free verse | |

A Poem for her Majesty the Queen on her Jubilee


To be English above all is not just a given, from the beginnings of time to the new world position.

It is of bravery and honour that has built the empire we know, that no matter what we may face no matter how big the enemy or challenge we will not quiver we shall not shudder nor walk away, our upper lip will remain stiff and the lions heart our enemy will feel in protection of Queen and country.

In a world of corruption and deceit, floundering morals as sources try to wash them away, inside this mayhem will always lay a loyal army to her Majesty and country that will fight tooth and nail to protect.
No matter the hatred or non believers we shall not fall. 

The most powerful family in the world that has ruled through generations of change and is echoed through the story of time this is my promise to you your Majesty we will always be here waiting on your every word to follow and serve as your loyal army. 

May GOD save the Queen and protect her people through time,
For we are ENGLAND . .  full of love . . . full of Pride! 


Details | Free verse | |

The Exam

The trees pace around the morning
with small steps, measured,
unconsciously wearing small circles
above my wind-tossed hair as I
warm a steel bench with the
patience of prey wrapped in undergrowth.

Sirens and taxis fight over a bone as
I huddle around a steaming paper cup.

Why must mornings announce
themselves so early in the day? 

Likely because they know my 
eyes will be at half mast, numb
to needling unwelcome news.

Perhaps it's the closest thing
to pity I'm meant to know.

My coffee cooled and palms warmed,
I abandon a full cup of illusions on the bench
and return to the waiting area.


Details | Free verse | |

Pretty much doubt it

If you were at the grocery store
Waiting in line
and the person ahead of you
was bored with waiting
so turned back to talk with you
and flashed you a grin...

and was missing a front tooth or two...

would you respond to her in the same way
you'd respond to a woman who packed a full set of
mighty bright
mighty tight
mighty expensive chompers?


Details | Free verse | |

Hospital Chirps

Written on July 23, 2012

As the doctors and nurses begin their day,
The cricket chirps resonate
Throughout the hallway;
as if they own all of the luck in the place.


Details | Free verse | |

marking time....to my friends on poetry soup.- the Lord helped me fight death and won.

i don't want to be just marking

time.  i died on november 20,

2008, during surgery.  i was

on a vent when i awakened 

december 2, 2008....my sisters'

birthday. what made me llive

i'll never know.  i know there

are things to do on this side

of death.



i have no time for marking time.

i have a stupid bag hanging from

my side now.  i am supposed to

"get comfortable with it".  well

that was a laugh.

that was a laugh until i thought

of the people that had these

things with no hope of ever

getting away from them.



i am so lucky.  14 days i laid

on a vent, then 22 more.

i came home 3 days, 



then 


i had
great pain in my chest...
.
well this is great i said,

a pulmonary emboli, 15 more

days, three days home.



then back to e.r. blood pressure

too high.  this bought me 

4 more days in e.r.



i am home now and finally 

have spent 19 days home.

i feel every pain and i feel

every time that i feel good



yes, i am never marking

time again.....there is

something about fighting

for your life and your sanity

that straightens things out.



i don't recommend it but

i wish i could let your hearts

know what i know.

janetta


Details | Free verse | |

LIFE IS SMALL

LIFE IS SMALL!
  -Dharga Nagar Safa

Many lives below my shoes broke,

Finishing my early morning walk,


Details | Free verse | |

Christmas 2009

Recession made Christmas harder than ever before
Family’s splitting – money the core
Dad’s leaving to live on the street
So that young hungry mouths are able to eat
That some extra cash might be in the house
and children might learn what Christmas is about?
But without Dad gone, roof would be lost
for the bills are much higher – we can’t meet the cost
No longer can the average family budget
2009, jobs lost, even working struggle to afford it
Commercialism needs to stop building hopes and dreams
Childern don’t understand you are busting at the seams
Disappointment reigns as kids outside taunt and tease
No longer we fit in we’re all on our knees
Sinking. Even love has fallen apart
We don’t want this Christmas just haven’t the heart!
Expectation lower, depressions set in
Politicians not helping the hole we’re all in
Instead raising taxes they’ll crucify more
and this miserable life could be at your door
Will someone tell them that family should be together
sharing love, life, hopes dreams whatever they weather


Details | Free verse | |

Gift Of Mortality

An earthly existence
A universe beyond my minds, comprehension
I die
I rise
Life lessons reviewed
Homeward bound
I am not lost, after all!
I am a willing participant
Serving, the Father, of all creation
His son combined, ‘producing life’ as we know it
Representing them, in everything I do
I am nothing, without Love!
My heart full of faith, loyal service I give
Learning how to unconditionally serve, as the Father unconditionally, loves me
Worshipping our Divine Creator’s existence
Choosing to live, moment to moment
Being as one with ‘Our Universal Father’
No physical permanency
My physicality, disappearing
My mortality existence, I let go of
Death temporary
My spirit alive!
Relief, Peace
‘I am only passing through!’
A unique, experience of mortality 
A gift, I am blessed to experience, to live!


Details | Free verse | |

Celebrating Recovery

Recovery is when I wake up
In the morning
And get out of bed.

Recovery is walking out
The door everyday
And going to experience Life.

Recovery is going to work
For some people.
Recovery for others is volunteering.

Recovery is a process of living a 
Satisfying and Meaningful
Lifestyle.

Recovery is creating and changing a New Life
For the better with
Values, Goals,
A Healthy Sense of self, and Overcome
Stigma.

Recovery is new attitudes,
Learning New Skills,
 It's all about Feelings.

Recovery is 
Self Transformation.

A journey once taken, a process to regain one's sense of self.


Details | Free verse | |

The Deer Bed

Cold crisp air this thirty-nine degree morning
Out on the chilly porch shivering from the cold

An unusual sound draws my attention
What could that possibly be this time of day
Three deer bedded down under the great oak
When they heard the door open spooked ran

The sky is clear, a very soft blue
Sun seems to radiate a halo
On this clear early morning
The color at the horizon is sand

Slightly tinted and shaken with pinkish brown
The roosters are crowing for the sun to come on
Their voices seem to oppose each other
As if to say this is my space, my day.

The veil of mist rises from the creek in the vale
Slowly creeping higher as if the cold air 
Weights in down in place

This is not a morning to linger for there 
Is no firepit or heater out here to warm 
The cold almost freezing air but the beauty
Is so inviting even though the chill sends shivers

Thank you God for this few minutes on the porch
It helps me to relax and renew my spirit
With this I can be a better person 
When I interact with others all day


Details | Free verse | |

Survival Strategy

Each day he felt the distance growing,
separating him from where and whom
they thought he should want to be.
Though he was adrift in the currents
of prevailing winds, he felt the pull
of strong undertows -- and he didn't know
to which he should acquiesce
or against which he should struggle.
He neither acquiesced nor struggled.
"Didn't he think he should shave,
shower regularly, get a hair cut, lose weight,
shine his shoes, change clothes, and show up early?
Shouldn't he set an example?"
He wanted to imagine a "but" to refute
apparent logic, could do no better
than to scribble description
which drifted across the pad,
influenced by other undertows.
He tried to last, having once believed
in the universal flux, but could no longer.
Finally, he avoided mirrors and others' eyes,
kept to the rooms' darker corners, and
no longer engaged in conversation --
not even with himself.


Details | Free verse | |

Pleading with a Whisper

Pleading with a Whisper
(About the Holocaust)
By:  Emily Kroeger

He begs of me to leave him.
Barley a whisper.

What can I do?

He lies here, begging me to let him die.
Barley a whisper.

What can I do?

Leave him to die?
Barley a whisper.

Leave him to be sent to a grave not worthy of him?
Barley a whisper.

No!  Never!
He’s my father!
Barley a whisper.

Father!
Father!
Oh my dear father, 
Barley a whisper.

I say through blurred eyes and unsteady voice,
Come, father, come,
Do not give into death.

Those lying around you have already seen heavens depths.
Barley a whisper.

Come father,
I will not let you fade away like a whisper in the wind.
 


Details | Free verse | |

The Boxing Match

'Ding-Ding-Ding'

Round 1
Your knees became weak
Learning that your opponent was The Great Enah;
The one to never lose a match.
The one to tear you apart from the inside,
with a double right hook to a left
uppercut combo,
and finally a killer left jab to the
right cheek to only take you out
for 3 seconds at a time;

Round 6
My heart sunk
Learning of your match when you were half way done.
At this point
struggling
just to
keep your
breath.
Battlescars have taken captive your beautiful flesh
Wrinkles of veins stand like mountains
above valleys of blood on your deteriorating skin.
Yet I watch you continue on,
to land a glorifying punch to say
"Everything will be alright."

Round 12
The final countdown
Revealing the final combo
A fatal melee straight through the chest.
I fell to my knees as she tumbled to the ring's floor.
The impact of her body loosely colliding to the ground
echoed in my gut.
6 Rounds,
Not even 60 or 600,
could prepare me for this moment -
She lost.

'Ding-Ding-Ding'


Details | Free verse | |

DYING TO LIVE

Strawberry locks flowing softly down her back.
Loving smile that enchants any one at first glance.
Petite fragile frame with sweet gentle ways.
Softly speaks of dreams that soar on butterflies wings.
A father's miracle that lights up his world.
Adored and admired by all that know the truth.
Fighter from the first breath of life.
Doctors are amazed she made it this far.
Angels descended to watch over her.
Much work to be done guided by the masters touch.
Each day will be cherished and safe in everyones hearts.


Details | Free verse | |

Finally Forever Done

I’m on ground, while you’re in the clouds,
You’re in the then; I’m in the here and now.

How come our channels can’t get a signal?
But I still feel the pull of your chords.
Are you getting bored? 

Tired of me complaining and I’m tired of waiting!
For the things, that should come naturally, like trust, love, respect,and intimacy.
I’m afraid but prepared indefinitely. 

I know my new energy will bring forth something that’s healthy.
God’s already secured my wealth and my safety.
I’m finally, forever done.


Details | Free verse | |

Inspiration: our Daily Bread of Life

Inspiration is all around me.  It swirles in the midst of darkness and deceit.  
Blinded by dry tears...the deliverers of this blessed word find me when I know not what to look for or where...
I and my kind walk in circles looking for and end to pain, deceit, betrayal, unlove, uncareing.  We are looking...but not invane.  

When the circles we walk in seem endless take heart and know that it is not a downward spiral...  Keep looking and you will see...  
     (C)....Catherine Buchner    2012
















Details | Free verse | |

Empty Words

Consuming your words
trim the fat from my waistline
like anorexics

The empty calories
in your words turned my face to shame
like bulimics

Your words like junk food
made  me unhealthy
as the years pass by

My thin darkened skin
wrinkled having no luster
awaits death

Empty calories in your words
took a toll on my soul
crushed my spirit

Now  one foot in the grave
one standing firm in life
I continue to strive


Details | Free verse | |

The Grace To Grow

The Grace To Grow

Through peril in its intact 
We have every reason by which to over react
The Grace to grow;
Many a shoulder to cry inflate the ego

Through our hard stance with fate
We lock our doors & protect out faith
In long lines at the store lest I emplore
Shades of trim left for me to begin

In oscillating ivory towers a man from Mars
The Grace to grow
From a little seed next the full grain blown to harvest once again
We can plant a seed deep enough through troubled waters come among

Shades of gems crimsome with rubbies
The cedar as a way of illumination
Perhaps I'm in need of a break on some long awaited vacation?
The Grace to grow



Details | Free verse | |

Slam/free verse/for PD

Talking 'bout surgery
Making my skin crawl
muscle spasms, pain and more pain
Who's talking 'bout surgery?

Read all you can and make the right choice
Believe me it gets worse before it gets better
Talking 'bout surgery
Muscle spasms, stiff neck and pain

The surgeon is smiling all the way to the bank
I'm crying and wishing I was dying
Looks like I have been in a street fight
Talking 'bout surgery!

Wake vomiting and bruises --where?
How did that?? Happen?
I.V. line beeped all night
How's a patient to get some sleep?
Talking 'bout surgery!!

I would like to thank everone for their prayers and well wishes on my neck surgery, I am getting alittle stronger every day!! Praise Jesus!!


Details | Free verse | |

The Beauty of Silence

Be still and quiet, 
Let the silence bathe you in warmth,
Shelter you, and let you breath free.

Be still and quiet,
Not a voice calling your name,
Not a sound from the street.

Be still and quiet,
Only the beating of your heart,
And the touch of the breeze.

Be still and quiet,
Let your mind crave solitude,
To gather strength and heal.

Be still and quiet,
Hold fast to these pauses in life,
For they are dear and essential.

Be still and quiet.


Details | Free verse | |

Independence

Freedom rang across the valley
Battles quiet in a moment of silence
Independence day has given her life purpose
Free to walk without pain
Free to live in harmony
Free to give to others each day
Free to make her house a home
Smiles and laughter flow at liberty
Torture has ended....life with peace began!


Details | Free verse | |

Samuel, Time Hates Us

Did you know time can slip by 
when we're not having fun?
Samuel, it hasn't been fun
These days that we've spent, 
it's felt like hours
And remember when you came 
to the door with flowers?
But time, Samuel-
it's never odd or even
Samuel, time hates us
We don't even have a moment 
that's just ours
Yet, chance made us friends
Sitting in Niagara, staring at the lights
Honestly, you and me, we could be free
And yet we're imprisoned
Steadily being caged in by time
We were from the beginning, 
we were from the start
Time hates us, dislikes us, 
loathes us, despises us
We're the eyes of it's storm
And yet I can tell in your eyes that you're happy
That even with a car running on empty
and not living a life we had envisioned,
We've made a world that stretches far
 


Details | Free verse | |

Hemorrhoid

The first time I had one
It really was not fun.
I called the doctor
and went right away.
I knew that, how is it hanging
was the first thing he would say.
And he did not let me down.
In fact he had me stand up.
OK drop your drawers
and as if that was not enough
for a fifteen year old,
lean across the table
I was told.
You have a good healthy hemorrhoid.  
Take good care of it.
Hopefully you will be partners for life.
Yeah, you sure do not want it to see a knife.
Now stand up and turn around,
No, leave your shorts on the floor.
He placed two fingers in a most 
delicate place.
Turn your head to the right and cough.
Then two fingers on the other side.
Now, turn the other way and cough.
Very good he said, they act just like 
they are supposed to. 
No, leave your drawers on the floor!
One more check he said.
I do not like that evil smile Doc.
What are you going to do.
Well, son I am going to check your prostate.
My pros what.
Your prostate. The thing that allows  
you to have sex.  
Who said I do that? 
Well, you need a history of when it is healthy
to know when it starts to have a problem.
So bend over that table.  
I really do not know what happened next
because in about ten seconds, 
I passed out.

I know you ladies find this in poor taste. So- - - 
To all the men, no matter when,
the FIRST TIME you had this done.


Details | Free verse | |

My Thing

Writing is my thing. My drug of choice. My bling bling.
I fall in love with the similies and mentions of passion while wrapping my body in 
sentences.
Creating complicated rhythms and making them simples as instances
Every line a differenet emphasis
Commas, explinations and periods
Sometimes rhyming and sometimes not
Stopping to puff so my thoughts can lock
Feeding hungry souls starved from starvation
Creating new creations
Making people feel the sensation as I build up to mind elevation

The quest for knowledge is not a game
Spoken movements teach about the pain
I write to ease the pain
Rhythms run deep

Deep underneath clouded visions of unspoken truth lies a message
a message...a message that should be taught accurately to the youth
About the struggle of a people that was misued
abused, refused, confused, raped, beaten down
uneducated
portrayed as clowns, coons, niggers, fools
Modern day niggas and goons
Wake up!! Did you hear the news?
You are responsible for you!
Imagine how it would be tho
If we were uninterrupted and brought overseas yo
Uprooted from a line of royalty kings and queens
Africa unite is all we'd sing
Rhythms run deeper into the seams of my being

I write to ease the pain of the oppressed
I write to celebrate their success
I write to educate the rest
The message..The message..The message is very clear
No time time to waste
The time is NOW
It's here!


Details | Free verse | |

Need for healing hands

Need of healing hands.
Dear God,
  Lay your healing hands on those that need.
May your hands take what's wrong away.
Don't shy away from this call.
We all pray for their needs.
Lay your hands on the sick 
And take the pain from them to fix.
Lay your healing hands on their head.
Bless them as we pray in your name 
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

Those nasty cigarettes

I wish to god at 17 I had never picked up that first cigarette, because now they are so 
expensive and they have me hooked into a mindset, that i have to have them all the time 
and quitting is a chore, i would like to quit the nasty things but without them i easily get 
bored. I know they are unhealthy the surgeon general clearly states on the pack, i wish that 
i could quit them to get rid of this nasty hack of a cough i always get in the morning, i had 
better quit the nasty things that nasty hack of a cough could be a warning.













      Don't really smoke
      just have heard that cigarettes are really bad
      for you


Details | Free verse | |

Betwixt Bars

Can you feel?

Can you feel the tremor?
That rocks your world
That shakes the cage
Like a beast trapped outside
A beast raging against the bars
It lifts, it throws, it rages
Can you feel it?

And in the aftermath,
You can hear the cooing, cajoling
Of puppeteers laying strings before your bars
And they croon and cluck like fretting hens
Petting your bars and calling for you
to reach out and take these strings
Tie them where they cannot reach
Deep within, where no one else goes
And let these good people in,
They preen and you shake your head
Seeing the gleam in their eyes
Oh so like the ape’s
Cooing, cajoling... cawing
And oh, how you can feel it...

But I’m here so hold on
I’ll sit by your bars,
I’ll sit by the door
right beneath that lock that turns from within
And I won’t rage, or set the siren’s call upon you
I’ll sit by your bars, and keep you company
My friend;

But Cold bars let through a breeze friend...
Your sharp breath is not secreted away
And with every breath you take
Your lungs are profaned
And you cannot hide
Behind bars

You cannot hide

From My voice, or my presence, or my eyes
My eyes that see too clear
And you cannot hide from what I see
What you can feel
Pressing in, from us all
So just let us in
My friend,
Let us in, for we will not be kept out
Life does not surrender, life does not hold back
Life seeps through
Every crack,
And be sure, there are cracks everywhere
Where there are breaths to be shared, there are bars to let them through,
And you feel it don’t you?
That which you see deep in my eyes
You feel it
That feeling so clearly reflected
When I look into your soul
That fear alive in my eyes
That rages within you,

But don’t fear a battle you have lost
Do not fear the day you must face the world
The world, friend, has never
Turned its face from you
And the rest of us:
Well we are not so brave
We are not iron bars moulded to flesh
That fear you see is real
And it is ours all
But we cannot hide
From what burns within
And I will not die
Hiding from life
And I will not cower when I tremble inside
I will not rest in a cage when I am tired
And I, friend, I am so tired
Of living between bars.


Details | Free verse | |

The Diary of a Tobacco Chewer

“I never travel without my diary,
One should have something sensational to read”

5-4-11: I never knew about the above quote of Wilde
But an event in life taught me to keep one.

4-23-94: Let me start with the initial jotting 
A local doctor said it’s just cough, a thing seasonal

5-5-94: No cure, consulted again after two weeks 
Advised to consult an ENT specialist attached to
A Medical College Hospital.

5-8-94: Diagnosed cancer of the vocal chords
 
5-10-94: But preferred to have a second opinion 
Confirmed the first opinion and advised radiation.
The word spread in the University Campus town
In the Bohemians circle that a Wicket (Cricket) down
Heard from many mouths the fate of the tobacco chewer.

5-15-94: A friend of my son came to see me on hearing the news
He had the disease of the same type and category 10 years back
He took the radiation and there he was a positive case.

7-4-94: Started the radiation therapy of six weeks  
Resigning 4 months earlier than the regular retirement.
Along with the radiation started the nature cure therapy
And the greatest of all therapies, the rosary with HIS name.

8-12-94 the radiation machine, only one in my State went off 
Consulted the Cancer Hospital at Mumbai  
Got the reply appointment after six months.

8-22-94: Luckily the treatment restarted after 10 days
 
9-2-94: And completed the radiation course.

12-5-94: Retested and was declared cancer free.

Thus the history of trials, tribulations, tests and tobacco taste.

5-4-11: The habit is still with me even to-day.
Oh, the digit 5 could be a lucky number for me.

                         +++++++
May 10, 2014
Form:Free Verse


Details | Free verse | |

'Flying without Wings'


I sometimes get to fly without wings 

with eyesight so perfect 
aches and pains
so distant 
almost forgotten 

strength coming from a place 
no one has ever seen 
but somehow 

yes somehow 
even my failing 
heart beats 
harmoniously


©150720121830


Details | Free verse | |

Pain

Your mind hurts, stung by worry needles,
Your trembling hands grab your bursting temples,
Your forehead is a flaming grill where thoughts entwine, 
Your lips are swelled and dry, they crack from every vine,
Your legs can't move because your feet are light as led,
Your hair roots feel as knives thrust in your head.
Your heart is pumping sand with rocks instead of blood,
Your memory encounters only  sad events singed with mud.
Your whole existence feels pitiful and grim,
Your body's a sombrero, pain dances on the brim.


Details | Free verse | |

A Hospital Stay - Part VI

                                                                   6.

                                                   Miracles and Miseries

The world resolved itself back into focus
As I lay amid the swarm of monitors
Still gulping the sword that brought me breath.

The worst now past
Many small miseries remained,
Chief among them the continuing mystery
Of my flooded, struggling lungs.

Finally I breathe well enough for the sword to be removed,
But the tests go on and on
The birth of each day bearing forth
Its own fresh indignity.

They give up guessing and haul me down again
To be opened anew and read for signs.

On the day this is done
The invisible agents of death outside
Decide to mock their pursuers
By leaving a tarot card at that day's shooting site.

They chose the Death card, of course
Revealing how little those 
Who choose to play God games really know
About the mystical.

Dreaming of omnipotence through dealing death
The unseen assassins miss their own meaning;
For this card signals change, the ending of present things.
They have unwittingly declared their game will soon be over,
Predicting their own demise.

Meanwhile the doctors make their own spread of me
And come up blank again.

     Once more I return to I.C.U.,
     Held together with staples.

     Once more the little agonies ensue:
     The sitting, the turning, the testing.

By night they come for my blood.
By day they come for  tests.
Always, in the background, the quiet moanings
Of we, the damned, condemned to medical Limbo
Roll on with the blind passage of hours and days.

     The English nurse comes, all brightness and bubble
     To heave my fragile self about;
     She's a welcome break in the monotony
     As my sustainers come and go.

Again the busy bedside conferences
And again the final admission
That all their probings have led down blind alleys.

A last-ditch effort is finally proposed:
Direct drainage of the drowning lungs.
To them this seems as a grasping at straws,
But to me it seems the one sensible solution,
And I look forward to it eagerly.
My inner mantra of "This too shall pass"
Is wearing thin.

Like a Christian martyr of old,
They pierce my back with their lance,
And the sea within that is drowning me
Finds its way out.

As the noxious waters within rush out,
Air surges into my grateful lungs.
From this moment, recovery becomes the new reality.

As I recover,
Indiscretion leads to capture 
Of the unseen terrormakers.

To the astonishment of all, 
They prove to be a dignified looking black man
And his enthralled protege' -
No prior convictions, no history of trouble 
Attached to them at all.

This is how our modern Destroyers come calling.
Well dressed, well spoken models of propriety.


Details | Free verse | |

death

Time fell fast 
Things became hard
Worries were vast
Lives begain scared

Hopes endlessly hidden
All things seemed forbidden
Days filled with darkness
Lives consumed and left sparkless

Awaiting the doom
Sitting only in gloom
Heaven wept
No souls were kept


Details | Free verse | |

Glorious Spring




Spring is here!!........ its very name, sets our hearts aglow,
all dormant life springs into action, after Winter's icy blow,
the harsher that frosty Season, the more we welcome Spring,
with its rejuvenating vigour, our World begins to sing.

As if passing through a 'Seasonal Gate', there's a secret Eden of pleasure,
suddenly we're surrounded by throbbing life, full of colourful treasure,
gambolling new born lambs, very light upon their feet,
bounding away to test new freedom, but not too far from Mother's bleat!

Crocus, Daffs and Snowdrops clamour for us to view,
Narcissi and Tulips in new Spring robes declare, 'we are in this too'!
a stimulant to young love, and sometimes not so young, this Season is a joy,
for this is how the World's gone round, since Adam was a boy.

Mother Nature has re-awakened, and donned her festive gown,
her glorious Show proclaims to all, she still wears her sparkling crown,
we thank you our dear lady, and, as so many times before,
when your Springtime's come along, you make our spirits SOAR!!.
hicky. 




Details | Free verse | |

Seized

New onset seizure,
Syncopal episode – hmmmm

Psychogenic origins?

Regardless of that
   I paid the price in full,
Although I’m grateful
      That bitten tongue
       And broken bone

Were not on sale today

Pain has painted my
         Body black
And stuffed my nerves
         With tar

I feel too thick in it
To move

Maybe tonight I’ll
Swim in dreams
Of darkest India inks


Details | Free verse | |

Bipolar

What’s big to me may be small for you
But when you hurt I hurt too
So many different phases I’ve been through
Withdrawal & self-indulgence just to name a few
I dodge sleep to note this nonsense to both me and you
My desperate attempt at understanding 
Has only led to more questions
I remember when medication numbed me well enough to stay quiet
Nonchalant 
A zombie!
All last night I cried and cried
And
You slept while I died all the more inside
I don’t have all the answers
One thing I know is
Dreaming and fantasizing 
In these worlds I find solace 
Seeing and realizing
It hurts…
It hurts…
People have been so unfair –
But then again 
What is fair?
So many questions…
Once upon a time,
I’ve put down my pen 
And 
Followed doctors and drugs
Their drugs, my drugs
Just stop judging me and fix me!
I’ve put down the drugs
Picked up a pen
And this is the reason other people say I’m doing well?
What’s real?
I can’t tell
Is it what you tell me or what I tell me?
Drugs have concealed me
Silenced me…
Taught me that I don’t have to feel just see
And shake my head
Now I can both feel 
And
Shake my head
I can verbalize 
Sure
But I’d rather not talk just write
I can write and write just to get it out on paper
But
It’s still in my mind
I’m not fixed
Still I cry and cry
While you sleep
So which am I supposed to choose?
Solace or the truth?


Details | Free verse | |

vacant days

vacant days of big fat cats
little old ladies with big
white hats

summer naps followed
by soft summer nights
turning into silver
dreams of.....

conjured up lovers
and riding machines

pasting in books of

innocent looking guys
with high flying schemes

brothers tender then 
hostile;  old loves gone
cold........

waiting for a ring
by a small black phone


Details | Free verse | |

A HUMOROUS GROWL

I am getting hungry y’all.
I have no food in the house.
I wonder why I have to order out.
Laugh out Loud
Colloquium

I am getting hungry you all.
I have to order out.
I have no food in my house.
LOL
Acronym

I am hungry y’all.
I have ordered out.
Still no food in my house
Don’t you dare laugh out.
Corrected 
_______________________|
Penned on May 01, 2014!


Details | Free verse | |

Cottage Futures

Dare I dream about a future cottage,
Where I live suits me well,
The beautiful tall trees and walkways,
There is a serene lake nearby,
Where you can view ducks and geese swimming past,
In the morning you can see the mist rise from the lake,
The sounds of nature are everywhere,
This is paradise to me for years,
To be thus blessed and thankful,
Days with nature and the outdoors through the years,
What pleasure and delight, at home with God's nature.
To return home and sit by the cafe window,
Savouring a delicious hot chocolate with cream,
My relatives guesting and sharing this paradise on special days,
God 's miraculous blessings come true,
Thankful appreciation to the Lord our God.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Rose Petals

Glowing and white, pure liquid flowing
My heart is expanding.
And I hear angels singing a song that fills my soul.
Rose petals are falling.

A slow steady walk, a gentle loping grace.
My smiling man in all black
So gorgeous. So perfect.
So mine.
My face is shining.
The angels are singing.
Rose petals are falling.

A steady warmth
So strong, and so deep
That gentle heat fills me to my core
And I find myself falling

Falling…Falling….falling.


Rose petals are falling.


Details | Free verse | |

My Final Destination

pain misdiagnosed for three years encouraging prognoses based on lies wish I could return to more carefree days but now I know neuropathy has my life on the line pain subsides as numbness sets in in time I’ll feel nothing at all but the bliss of eternal life when my autonomic nervous system shuts down no fear, no tears just expectation reuniting with loved ones who passed sharing love that never dies in the spirit world my final destination
*Entry for LeighAnn’s “Afflictions” Contest


Details | Free verse | |

Thanks Given

My thanks is given 
not to what I have,
but to what I don't.

I don't have;
bad health,
regrets,
hate,
sadness,
or fear.

I am truly thankful for all the things I don't have.


Details | Free verse | |

Super ego, ego and id'ism

The sub-conscious jugernaught,
And it’s defence mechanism, 
For so long your multi-faceted dimension we’ve fought,
So commonly known as super ego, ego and id’ism.

We can all be mean, jealous, envious,
Sometimes kind, caring and compassionate at best,
What we don’t like, we call social deviance,
I know all the me’s I can be, collectively we’ve got a chance,
Not much is known by the layman,
There’s a reason we feed from the tame hand,
Each one of us immensely powerful,
We need our vision back to make it's power null,
revealing, no cohesion, a fictional entity cull.

The mind unravels and absorbes the 'knowing' wealth,
letting go of the ego and in 'their' terms my mental health.


Details | Free verse | |

Tear in My Heart

My mother never knew what to do with me.
I was an obligation that needed to be. 
But I wanted her to love me.
Simply… love… me.
I would do anything to please her.
Wanting her to be proud, I worked hard at everything I did.
But she viewed me as her competition, not wanting to be out done.
Needless to say our relationship wasn’t what I wanted it to be.
I dreamed to have a family of my own to simply… love… me. 
I had a daughter who didn’t live. 
And my mom said someone like me shouldn’t have kids.
Though she didn’t know about my epilepsy and other problems with my health.
Then my life fell apart with hard times everywhere.
I didn’t show it but hidden…my health wasn’t all that good.
My husband’s diabetes affected his mind. And epilepsy was working on mine.
I ignored that fact. I worked hard as my epilepsy kept tearing every thing apart.
Finally with a hard earned job… Fourteen years later I had a son. 
The son I’d always wanted to have.
I was so very proud but was attacked by both health and son, at every turn.
He was wilder than most creating problems everywhere.
He blamed me for everything and everywhere something went wrong.
My health did it again at work as my relationship continued to crumble with my son.
He hated a mother who had to work, had epilepsy, and just wasn’t there for him. 
I was slowly dying when he was 12 and I was 52, when finally I was saved.
That night… I met God and he said I had more to be done along the way.
I came back and did every thing I could to help my wayward and unruly son.
But way before I helped him go to college… I knew I had lost my son.
But his best friend needed a mom so I was there for him.
It seems so strange to tell, but as my son moved out… His best friend simply moved in.
And it’s even stranger to tell that… 
The son who will occasionally smile at me, is someone else’s son.
He’s my heart-adopted son and has brought my first son closer again.
Jesus was always here and… the tear in my heart is gone.


Details | Free verse | |

Kiss the rain

Feeling tired
Your body stressed
Mind a tumbling
Dont know whats best
Look out the window
Another damp day
Put on some shoes
It is time to lay ..
Those tears at bay

Look up look up
Feel  my touch
Thats what the  rain
Is saying to you
Lift up your face
Let my touch heal
Destress your soul
Make you whole ..
Tears gone away 

Your aches fade away
Your body feels limp
The stress is abating
A small smile appears
The rain is so cool
Don't want it to stop
You lick at your lips
Quenching your love ..
Tears of hope now

Those magic raindrops
Work for you
Making life lighter
Easier to cope
Smiling again
Dimples on show
Life is worth living
Full of hope ...
Tears of joy now

All thanks to those fine raindrops, healing from above.



22/02/2013


Details | Free verse | |

Hospital Visit

The hospital corridors are silent
but outpatients reception is busy,
muffled voices are heard behind closed doors,
a shuffling dressing gown stalks the silent halls
in fluffy slippers pushing a drip stand,
waiting patients just in from the cold 
disrobe. "Heather" the tannoy remarks,
assessment room three is empty for you,
"Heather" departs, a young girl is frightened
she hug her mum tight, a blood test awaits,
it won't hurt much she says, just a little jab.
appointment for 9 but no movement by 10,
a white uniform amazon appears,
seven vials of blood later I'm let go,
Ray of the X-Ray takes me in tow, strip off
he says chin on the bar make like the chicken.
chest out, big breath, hold it, relax and breath,
you're wearing a cross, chin on the bar,
big breath, hold it, hold it, hold it, relax.
back to reception tell them you're done,
now pay 6.50 for a latte and biscuit,
you've been done, should have had a water.


Details | Free verse | |

Life want to see U, without ICU

I can’t believe, I am in ICU

Now that I am, Life want to see U
From ICU, THROUGH ICU... ... ...

Retrospecting.... .... ...
Using morality and spirituality as a cornerstone
Devotedly set off to build mansion of success
Laid Foundation solid, walls incomplete for right stones

Fear of losing or sense of deprivation never put me down
FAITH in HIM, not barring belief that I am chosen one
Chose HIS mission to raise the bar in everyone

Now that I am in ICU
Life want to see U, BEYOND ICU... ... ...

Introspecting.... ... ...
Many believe, ICU is a stage between Life and Death
However, Life is stage, ICU the break-in-between
Karma’s audience evaluating life-death cycle umpteen

Worry never resolves, Destiny ever evolves
In HIM Life's solution lies, in death too HIS solution lies 
Nobody can create vacuum, NO BODY can fill vacuum 

Now that I am in ICU
Life, want to see U, WITHOUT ICU... ... ...


Details | Free verse | |

The Wise

The wisdom learned in sorrow
is joy to the meek at heart
for whatever travail hath a wise man
unto his soul imparts

The foolish gaze afar off
their understanding taken
Behold the wise man in his grief
pained yet hardly shaken

For wisdom holds on to a vision
where separate worlds entwine
To foolish men a great division
but eternal ties unto the wise

Where never ending love prevails
and boundless patience stands
Where fools' advice cannot avail
the wisdom of a man

There faith and hope abide as one
unto the wise his peace
but foolishness to those who judge
by standards that decrease

What then is a human worth
if he be judged by worldly gain
And what of the fools who devise hurt
that a soul may not attain

Still wisdom having endured test
stays rooted to the ground
and foolish tongues are put to rest
as the wise man yet abounds...


Details | Free verse | |

BIRTHDAY

BIRTHDAY

I am 82
And feel it through and through
One more birthday here
With many years gone somewhere
I suspect I’ll get a cake

Get birthday greetings
I’m so leery of sweet things
Cards would be enough
Gut won’t stand the sugar stuff
Keep the tums handy old man



Details | Free verse | |

Hit By Illness

Illness, like a stealthy thief, 
snuck up on me, knocked me flat, 
and ransacked my interior,

Taking things I didn’t know 
were missing until I
got back up again. 

Gone was the mask 
of illusion that shielded 
me from my mortality.

Bare were the walls 
that kept sorrow 
hidden for years. 

Robbed of certainty
and confidence in 
my own capabilities,

I stood vulnerable
in the uncluttered space
of my life - 

and found poetry.


Details | Free verse | |

Testing Hope

moments test us
months possess us
days go by in etched fog of illness
too clear to be a lesson
no time for self pity

moments of zero pain
make the heart sing
restore possibility
almost opens the future

cautiously,  I test hope


Details | Free verse | |

By His stripes I am healed

By His stripes I am healed
By His blood I am washed
I am a new creation
And forever I am free

Wash me in your spirit
Purge me from my sin
Take away the shame I feel.
And bring me into peace

Cleanse me from all wrong
Thoughts and attitudes
Cleanse my body, make me whole
Wash me clean with your power

Make me the child who can be taught
Who is willing to be led
Let me eat of the living word
And truly well be fed

Let your healing flow through me
And touch another heart
Show your loving grace through me
And let them truly see

You are the son who sets them free
When in faith they bend the knee
You have come to give them life.
And give them all eternity


Details | Free verse | |

Four Smart Kids

Four kids
Four smart kids
Never fell below 90% in tests
Impressing people daily
Teachers pinching themselves in disbelief
Winning spelling bees
Maths competitions
Those same four
Were offered to go to university early
But they lost the offer
To a rich family with
A stupid child.

High school
A place of heartbreakers
Drugs
And Abuse
These four kids
Ran into a drug dealer
The dealer knew about their gift
So he got these kids high off weed 
claiming It was brain food
Another dealer sold them Vodka
Claiming it kept you going during
Long study periods

Before long
These four smart kids
Were just four dimwitted druggos
Smoking weed
Drinking cheap liquor
Twenty Four Hours
Seven days a week
These kids had potential
But it all washed away
Like a sandcastle on the beach
As the tide comes in
Good for nothing
But to end up like those dealers
Selling goods to smart kids
Like their former selves

Drugs destroyed these four kids
Don't let it destroy you


Details | Free verse | |

Felt A Funeral In My Brain

In light an observed heat to penetrate the night

I felt a funeral in my brain kind of insane?
Struggles to reach the perplexed end yet to what;
A dungeon of its myraid calling
Now deeper penetrating deeper to its torn crust 

To equate logic at its visible mile

A shade of torn logic in derision
What was your parting decision/
One will equate logical persuasion?
A vested call in search of its perplexed acquaintance

Felt a funeral in my brain kind of lost now insane;

Shaped dreams from my hair the pretty child awaits the storm;

In eternity's charm fought back the silence from within....
Shades of torn columns of sod branched in its delicate cuff


Perhaps this is the place where Nero once tred?


Details | Free verse | |

NICOTINE DREAM

                                                     Nicotine death
                                                     devil in smoke 

                               shining in front your eyes with Harry potters
                                                 invisible cloak taking
                                                 Breath by breath with 
                                                      every smoke 
                                                       you'll choke

                                                        its no joke
                                         stop the smoke stop the smoke 

                  black
                                tar 
                  dimming 
                        a
                     inner 
                                star
                             shriveling
                                    lungs

                                          far to 
                                               young  bad tasting
                                                       tongue

struggling to 
     absorb air 

so you seek to sit down some where ,frantically stretching
to reach a near chair, with a mysterious fear, with the 
other hand wiping a single tear, and you can hear a 
loud chime and ringing ,as your swaying swinging and 
you whisper your last poem, that you never got to show EM!
 HE SAYS ......I shall never smoke again..... THE END
                  He in the arms of Gentle she.
                he watches his body from above
                              it was to late 
                Becoming smoke was his final fate....
                          ITS SAD TO SAY IT!

                              Grime in lungs
                     Grime took his time away
               with his wife and kids he couldn't stay 
                               I don't know but 
                              i am no hypocrite
                             but I decided to quit!


Details | Free verse | |

Assassins' Wave

This ancient warrior frowns.
His distinguished life caught fast
In the threads of a
Cunning spider’s web.
Entrapment spun by
A dark invader.
 
His only hope of
Survival is a
Cold assassins’ tool.
Chemical warfare,
The wave of carnage.
 
This ancient warrior cries
To see the mindless slaughter
Of innocents to
Conquer the dark
Cancerous malice.
Sacrificial lambs.
 
Fatigue with kindness
Soothes his troubled soul
And spurs his will to
fight. He drifts in waves
Through poisonous seas.
 
This ancient warrior smiles.
Death retreats in shadowed haste.
Ambition thwarted
By assassins’ wave.
The dark invader
Choking, fades to dust.


Details | Free verse | |

Words No One Hears

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION

~JSLambert


Details | Free verse | |

The Sun Rises

I'd been the fire in the rain
the sun in the storm 
I'd been everywhere
and nowhere 

my broken back arched
once in defiance,
a monk chanted and
the moon stood still 

I told him, 
don’t pray for me I am a
godless goddess
the white fire burns in me 
and no other

through a tongue-less mouth
I screamed for release
into the otherworld
having a million words to say
I was speechless

~~~

the sun rises in me again
healing my wounds 
the answer to my cries 
I am free again to dream

my monk friend,
take my hands feel my faith
my broken back now healed
arches in exaltation

I dance on moonbeams
sliding the light of beauty 
dream catchers spin with 
the sound of my first word

I am reborn and new once more
only my joy will be the death of me


Details | Free verse | |

Hollow Shell

I am a ghost, drifting aimlessly from place to place.

All will power is sucked out of me, like a black hole in my soul.

My two cents are worth nothing in this world.

I am merely hidden behind a mask,

Dodging this never-ending path of fun house mirrors.


The mental battle is relentless,

Creating illusions that deep down I know aren’t true.

A sham, a mock of my former self.

He is the force clutching me tightly,

Ceasing me from all aspects of reality.

He is anorexia.


Compared to him, I am weak.

I am worth nothing.

I resist his force to no avail,

Only to stumble and crumble once again.
 

Pointing fingers does no good.

Trust me, I’ve tried.

But no one is to blame.

Not family, not society, not myself.


Yet each day is a new beginning.

An opportunity to change.

An opportunity to prosper.

Along with an opportunity to fail and give in.


He is charismatic, 

Telling me I am helpless without him.

I trusted him, but no longer.
 
No longer will I obey.

No longer will I be defeated.

No longer will I surrender to his selfish commands.


When he presses me to give up,

Ambition cries, “Keep fighting.”

I struggle to my feet,

Longing for closure.


I fall short again,

Knowing if I strive to achieve,

I will.

Knowing if I aim to succeed,

I will.

Knowing if I risk failure, it could happen.

Yet without attempt, there is no prosperity.


I will not give in.

I will not back down.

I will not lose.

I will escape this war triumphant,

No matter the cost.


Details | Free verse | |

Hallux Rigidus

.
Hallux rigidus at the first metatarsophanlangeal joint

Old woman's shoes suggested by the orthopedic surgeon_____

                                                  The nerve!!

Oh!! Shucks my driving toe...

                                   
                                  It hurts to drive~~~

                                                          He says to let the toe rest stay off of it.....

The fix for right now_
          
                               Injection of Kenalog(a steriod)...

PAIN, AGONY and DESPAIR.....

                                              Horrible!!

Old age has its pit falls...

                                          Someday though I will shed this body of clay

I'll have a new body, Praise the Lord, I'll have a new life...  


Details | Free verse | |

The Black Dog and the Wall

I always have a Black Dog
Whose friend is the Black Wall
I can keep ahead of the dog
Most days
The wall is easy to step around
Most times

But

The constant nipping of the dog
On my person
On my soul
Finally
Paralyzes 
Me

I see the wall

It covers the sky
It covers the sun
It hides me
From my family
From my friends

Look to the left
The wall is all I see
Look to the right
The wall is all I see

Great Wall of Depression

So it begins again

Time off work
Tweak the meds
Exercise
Mindfulness
Yoga
Counselling

Now something new
To tie up the dog
To break through the wall

Poetry

Writing
Expressing
Feeling

Again

A crack in the wall?
A beam of light?

Black Dog still barking
But just out of
My reach

Hope envelopes 
Me

The nightmare is ending

Again


Details | Free verse | |

Your eyes, your life, your dreams

Your eyes, your life, your dreams..


In my eyes,  the future is a dream
that may come to realization in our present, 
or simply never exist.. 

Always try to live your life day by day 
with whatever you feel, live, see, and love. 
It takes one second for all you have lived to disappear.. 
and your memories to be erased!

Your brain is the key to your feelings, 
And what you have lived and built is part of your life. 
You life is the true proof of happiness
To what you have lived and built. 

Always try to appreciate what you have for the day; 
As whatever else you have, and whatever is left, 
it will be just memories and dreams. 
Memories and dreams from a future you may hold  tomorrow...
                                                                                   ... in memories of yesterday!

Dedicated to A.M.S.


Details | Free verse | |

To Be Sent To The Mental Hospital

Hot Tent,
I almost purposely lost my mind,
to be confined to four walls
of intesifying white,
but if the pen was a threat
I'd hospitalize my life
by falling ill to death,
a little more 
and I'd sink into
my hands in one sweet sobbing drone
to drown in fumes-
so take me to the tent, because
I proper express my emotions in vent,
doctors purely expressing obligations of
higher in command, and that because
of handbooks handed down from legal hands...
first the fist,
then sweet logic missed,
and the product of beaurocracy- shaking
obligatory hands in exchange for coins
later laid to rest on Ophelia's blessed
eyes, floating down the river
dead of liver failure and hands stained with
blood and vomit, 
waited too long for the happiness
to set in, until organs bled in, unable to contain
the love, Oh Joy! If I could recompense
my friends and family who suffered at my expense-
I cry, I have my own cell and I stick my hands
out of steel bars, to be washed
of ultimate sin, the inability to let God in,
I killed his son today, the easy way, letting Lucifer
sit in the brain, and breed cruel thoughts now laid,
Hell No... all heaven sent, each thought is a plot,
but each thought is an idea I misrepresent,
I won't repent, I won't repent, I won't repent,
burning hot in the Hot Tent.


Details | Free verse | |

Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder

And maybe tonight in feasting
I'll inhale the flavors of my meal
and exhale colors in the wind
I have not been chosen
beyond our understanding, it just is
It’s the quiet that scares me
so I'm a puppeteer of the shadows
Dancing near the light source
to feed my lonely
I breathe this naturally
Another dimension
Another time
More laughter

I'm pacing and spinning
Yelling and singing
I'm in control
until the arch of my feet gets weak
from chasing the muse my bed becomes
And I'm tired
In prayer I lay
The only air left  to breathe is the regret of wasting the day 
It was never us
Just me filling the spaces of those I want to love
They are not here now
They cant share this with me
I'm only weak
It's only me


Details | Free verse | |

Feel The Love

Diving deep, into the void, within
Washing, cleansing, myself clean
Trusting without expectation
Letting go of, what I am familiar with
Allowing the divine, infinite spirit to guide me
Teaching me how to live
Growing inside my heart and mind
Larger than my mind’s ego
As I consciously shed light, upon my self created burdens
Lighting up, my made up fears, my mind has believed, all these years
All the mistakes I have made, now become my greatest blessings
Showing me how to love, without attachment
Discovering, who I truly am


Details | Free verse | |

The transformation of the skeletal soul

Winding winding
winding
baby
wicked
wicked
Baby 
seasons
Today Now now 
now now
baby
Sex SEx
now
hey hey 
Name


seasons winding 
hey hey
baby
wicked wicked wicked
today
baby baby
Sex Sex Sex
hey

anybody
anybody anybody
anybody
winding
hey Sex
Sex Sex Sex SEx
hey hey
seasons anybody 
anybody 
winding winding
hey hey hey









Details | Free verse | |

Malfunctioning

Once more without sleep
all dreams exhausted
Neurotransmitters on high alert
rekindling furious flames
that lap hungrily through mid-back to feet
Like a chippy chiseling wood on the lathe
I splinter and crack - screaming for regression
Just as a computer malfunctioning
I await time for reboot of my system
brief medical intervention - 
some respite peace and solace
that in the whole of life 
taken as one performance of the arts
it is but a musical interlude
short-lived in high anticipation of entr'acte



Terms used:-

chippy - a carpenter

solace - relief from emotional distress/source of comfort at a time 
            of sadness, grief or disappointment

interlude - short period of transition/break

entr'acte - between the acts


Details | Free verse | |

Snacks

Potato chips,
Crisp and salty,
A few are burnt,
Therefore faulty...

Pretzels twisted
Around your neck,
But crispy and fresh,
Oh what the heck...

M & Ms upside down
Are W & W's,
I have to frown...

All I want, a piece of cheese,
All I've got, the sneeze of Louise
Wouldn't  mind an ice cold beer,
Sip of champagne,
But I fear,
Lucky to get a drop of water
From a dirty puddle,
Oh, I'd love,
My sweetheart to cuddle

Sardines, salami, Ritz and more,
All those snacks I used to adore,
An empty cupboard,
Doors do groan,
Once again,
I am alone...

Just as well, appetite did fade,
Even for a chug
Of GatorAid

One last pack
Of long grained rice,
Not a food
I find so nice

One can fade away
In American life,
Resources unequal
Changes in your wife...

Have an olive,
Have a roll,
Put on some cold-cuts,
Satisfaction
Your sole goal...

Gnawing on my Slim Jim
I wonder if anyone alive
Ever met him...
Popcorn seems a
likely choice,
Popping in the micro
It's only voice.

All a dream,
I have no food,
I'm left in hunger
For me to brood.


Details | Free verse | |

Gravity

You have unfailingly demonstrated your love
      every law     supporting      our galaxy
is so      harmonious      that this
little blue paradise      could not exist
      every      thread      and       movement
so precise      we can measure
its movements right down to atomic levels
 
All so         this small space
could provide          everything         anyone
who had           any appreciation
might understand that we have
      been provided abundantly          every delight
in the way         of plans          for a Utopia
 
      Yet the movements      of every ruling body
of science         religions         governments          corporations
      seem bent         on destruction
tampering      with the finesse      of precision
      incorporated      in the molecules      of life 
Continuous self reproduction      and regeneration      in nature
right down to making           "seeds who self destruct"
      to make nature          exactly as themselves
 
I divorce publicly          these unions of violence
demonstrated in their every thought and deed
      poisonous words          poisonous chemicals
totalitarian ideology          pandemic to 
the leaders           of these factions 
      warring with each other          hoarding the
wealth       of a planet       given freely to
      the father of our species
 
And if you don't believe that
          then think nature gave it freely
of her every fruit         produced by her ground
          YOU WARRING FOOLS
who delight in the peril      and fall
of your own family
      who know not          nor recognize
your own worth      or the worth
of everything          and          everyone around you
 
No , but you      fall at the feet
admiringly of all               these mongrels
          the media who worship
          these fine movers and shakers
who roll      right over you      and think
you should be trained groupies
these men          who kill your planet
          with ideologies and philosophies 
whose very design          is to denigrate
your worth          and exalt themselves
 
Therefore       I will exalt      in your instruction
          the progenitor of life       for as surly
as we examine          the work of life
      we are moved      by its abundant wealth
freely shared      with all who live on this little rock
to examine          why we all are unable
to fluently          live          within its confines
 
I think I will not walk off the cliff today
gravity is my friend if I know her rules
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2012 C Michael Miller
via Duboff Law Group LLC


Details | Free verse | |

Autumn Ladies

Beautiful autumn ladies
Leaves have fallen by the way
Frost hybernates your spirit
Spring leaves don't sprout
        Your bulbs won't burst forth pink.

Turbin covers
Mask fears....


Details | Free verse | |

Buggy Ride

Whoa!
stop the wagon, bucko
I wanna get off
who invented this
ride goin' nowhere?

no difference 'tween me
and the coach I'm riding 
I'm no Cinderella 
and it ain't no pumpkin.
we're bumping along together 

think I'll crawl, stumble, walk
'stead of riding a passenger 
in that safe ol' buggy
anymore


Details | Free verse | |

What About the Rest of the World

What about the rest of the world?
The American Dream certainly seems like a dream
If WE aren’t what WE seem to be
What about what we see on the television screen
Or
Read in some paper or learn in school?
History portrays hardships and the advancements we’ve made
Yet everyone’s a slave to SOME cause
Still the rich remain rich
And 
The poor remain poor
To be rich is far more than your financials
Or
Your assets 
Or 
Any other materialistic THING
To be rich is to flourish from nature 
WITH
Nature
To be rich is to thrive from our uniqueness 
Not adjusting
Solely
Trusting that the planet and each and every creature 
Will survive if we aren’t petty
Or 
Overindulgent
Those without speech subtly show the beauty in collaboration
How a world without worry is possible 
With cooperation
Vegetation’s manifestation of a creation seemingly above our nation 
Above humans
There is a hierarchy
Yet we are co-inhabitants of one planet
Visions of the top may be attractive
But
There’s just not enough oxygen to permit a clear head with clear thoughts 
WE are nature!


Details | Free verse | |

Insomnia

Insomnia, you're not my friend, so why do you show up?
I wish you'd leave me be, and let me sleep! ..no luck.
Go bother someone else. You are not welcome here.
Your jesting lacks of cordial tidings, more then less sincere.
I don't appreciate your time, I'm not a fan of yours.
Your company is overstayed, it leaves me mad and bored.
I sent no inventions and you were not summoned hither.
I'm usually a gracious host, but hosting you is bitter.
Insomnia, you're not my friend, I'd rather that you left.
It's nothing personal, my friend, I just prefer my bed!


Details | Free verse | |

Lifetime

You can not regain lost time
for it is spent
Past
forever gone
The moment to hesitate is through
No way to turn those hands back
Retreat return – no, never
Seconds tick by
onwardly marching
For time it stops for no one

And yet the future
now is time 
for change
for remembering
for recollecting
effecting what may be
doing things for the now
living life with no regrets
move on 
for life time is precious


Details | Free verse | |

I'll Never Know

It's like I'm drowning
and you're the water
but somehow
you're also the air that I need to breathe
how that is
I'll never understand.


Details | Free verse | |

A Crown-Never a Nudnik

I woke up on a fresh Friday morning and introduced myself to a new day
A sweet smile stretched and a beautiful kiss of the wind lay on my cheek
Brushing my teeth and heading off to the kitchen for a delicious breakfast,
A visitor knocked on my cheek’s door
Kind and caring I was, for I welcomed him and opened my pink castle’s doors
An old visitor, it was, 
Beside him was a young man holding the old man like something dear
I invited both of them to the dining room where a long red carpet lay
and walls of pearls guarded my castle
My pink castle doors were strongly fastened; no air can survive

Coffee and tea were offered to the gentlemen in front of me
A sip from here and a gulp from there
Words began to mutter themselves out of the old man’s cave:
“Ab ovo, I am here with a wise gift to thee
I am here because it is time for thou to hold and protect thee wise
For it is a symbol of wisdom and not ignorance
It is a symbol of maturity and not childishness
Come my wise child, rise”

And so, the young man rose and approached towards me
In his hands was a parchment carved with beautiful scarlet ink
Vigilantly, I slowly opened it to read:
“Today, a wisdom tooth shall tear its way towards sunlight
For you, dear beholder, have become shrewd enough to be handed a crown
Never lose it, never leave it, never take it off
Never let anybody borrow it and never forget about it
Tonight, you shall feel pain, but you are strong
Hold on and don’t give up, for you shall behold a treasure”

Suddenly, a drift of whistling wind entered my castle
The visitors were gone, 
Pain stroke, but a wisdom tooth grew…


Details | Free verse | |

Blind Mind

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION


Details | Free verse | |

Fly Butterfly Fly

Fly butterfly carry my dream past the wind and through the trees. Spread your wings to help me to see, the colours of heaven as they should be. Butterfly fly show me the way to learn to dance, to sing, to prey. If you see my guiding light, then beg the spirits to make it right. If you see heavens glow don’t be shy, please let me go. So their light can bless my soul, heal my heart and make me whole. Fly butterfly land on me, break my cocoon and set me free. Fly butterfly fly for me...


Details | Free verse | |

I am numb

Don't ask me how I think, don't ask me how I feel, don't ask for explanations I am numb. Don't raise insightful queries or try to coax replies, it's not that I don't hear you; I am numb. Don't ask me what the time is or what I'd like to eat, I hardly know what day it is, I am numb. Don't ask me in-depth questions or even something light, you're best off leaving well alone, I am numb. Don't try to make me ponder, the process only hurts, just let my brain go back to sleep I am numb. It's not that I am shallow or that nothing lies within, it's just that I can't reach it....... I am numb.


Details | Free verse | |

Mind And Then The Body (Christmas 2009)

Christmas Day 2009,
I went to see my grandma for what I'm sure will be the last time,
I enter the code and into the door,
Into the lift to the second floor,
Past the T.V room and an eerie feeling tilted and odd,
The folks in Christmas hats are all on the nod,
The smell of a cheap roast n the stench of getting old,
And my grandma mumbles that the rooms too cold,
She wants to go for a walk but she doesn't know where,
She doesn't remember who I am...
It doesn't seem fair that she was once smart, feisty and bold,
Ive never, not once, thought I'll get that old..
Cant take it, Don't want to see it, the guilt, my grandma all alone,
She lost her mind, her bodies going and it all stated in an old peoples home.


Details | Free verse | |

A Hospital Stay - Part V

                                                                  5.

                                                        The In-Between

     There, in the In-Between,
     No trumpets sound
     No beings clad in gold celestial fire
     Arrive as guides to the heart's desire,
          Only silence falls
     Throughout the velvet deep profound.
     At the In-Between,
          No Savior calls
     For there is naught but nothingness;
     An emptiness entire.

Strangely, I sensed myself suspended
In a nevertime of not-quite-being.

Such was the In-Between, where now I wandered.

As though it had always been,
I felt myself afloat, adrift
Upon some frigid river full of ice
Which had no source and knew no end,
That traveled 'round and 'round and back again upon itself
Rising and falling over distant hills and bearing me with it
- Or rather, what was left of me -
Along in its meaningless, endless circuit.

Nor dark nor light intruded.
Vision compassed only what might be envisioned,
Images forming and fading
Within the little cavern of my skull.

Voices without discernable words.
Murmmerings within the waters.

Something like a sword
Was lodged down my throat.
I gagged upon it, over and over;
Unseen hands would withdraw it, then shove it down again.

The main thought flickering in my head
As I lay in this place
Was of how I seemed to have become some frail remnant
Of whatever I once was.
No longer did I have that sense of flesh
Containing the shape of me,
Nor the feel of muscle, nor the bone beneath.
I felt I had somehow been rendered
Some modern scientific wonder,
A creature flayed alive yet living
In some embryonic form, possessed of such shape as it could claim
By virtue of a remaining mass of nervous tissue;
A minimalist miracle
Preserved in a nutrient bath by the power and will
Of a conclave of white smocked High Priests of medicine.

Strangest of all, perhaps
Was that this perception of my fate
Occasioned in me not horror, 
But rather a regretful sadness.
"What will they tell my wife?" I sighed in my mind.

     Yet, by slow degrees the feel of the outward world
     Stole in upon my little hell of shapelessness.
     The throbbing thing I seemed to have become
     Refleshed itself somehow,
     Though the sword in its throat remained.

Distant voices resolved into speech again,
And as they did I felt myself begin moving again
'Round and 'round as before, still on circuit
But no longer floating on ice.
Now, instead, I seemed lain on some unseen track
Circling through a low-roofed sandstone cavern.

When I passed the band of light 
That marked the faroff entrance of this cave,
I would hear the voice of that Boy Who Would Be Our King
Exhorting the Disunited Nations
To join his crusade to punish his chosen scapegoat
For an evil he had helped loose upon the world.
The long silences that followed his harangues
Revealed the skepticism of his audience.

     I could sense that a long roll call of the dead
     Would soon be scrolling past the world's collective eyes,
     Be his call accepted or no;
     This was for show, decisions had already been made.

I regained perception of how dangerous things were becoming out there,
Out there where I'd lost my way, to stumble into this place,
How long ago I could no longer recall.

I knew this to be its nature, though
And as well that this was where I belonged, Out There
Where the only source of peace or peace of mind
Was the hope we wove between ourselves
With threads of unstoppable possibilities
The human way spins for itself.

I knew where I belonged, and reached out for it.

     I came back to be within
     The folds of all I love
     To seek the mystic shine of life
     Expressed in friends, relations, wife
     Awaiting my return.
     I began to climb Above
     Back to where all hopes begin
     To where desires brightly burn
     Until their ash shines whiter than
     The purer feathers of the dove.


Details | Free verse | |

Zulu Dawn

When you first hear those fateful words
It hits you like a thunderbolt
Although totally expected
The blood still drains from your face
You sit, disbelieving, shocked, numb
Not quite able to take it in
You ask the usual questions
How long have I got, will it hurt
Is there nothing that can be done
But you know, way down, deep inside
This is it, the end is in sight
The day you dreaded is finally here
That rock and roll lifestyle of old
Has come back to bite your backside
So you ask the only question
That matters to you any more
“Will I be able to eat nuts,
Once the dentures are in, I mean?”


Details | Free verse | |

Awakening

Are we awake or are we still sleeping?
Blind to the hurt, and deaf to the weeping.
Ashamed of religion and supportive of the new,
Aware of the lies and hidden from what’s true. 

Worship the evil and turn away the pure,
Developing disease with an unknown cure.
Starving the poor and overfeeding the wealthy.
Killing the sick and drugging the healthy. 

Going to war for some kind of power,
Building tall structures over all types of flower.
Cutting the trees and polluting the air,
All out of greed, with no sort of care. 

Turning us against our own, 
And help from up above.
Making us beings of hate,
Instead of ones of love. 

Demonizing the mystic,
Criticizing the wise.
Making our own family members,
Into people that we despise.

Awaken to the torment, 
Be aware of all the pain. 
Those who are misleading,
And claiming that we are insane.


Details | Free verse | |

New Tenant

Hmmm...
this one ain't as weighty
and oooh!!...
peach sheets!
smells pretty good and
feel soft too.
I hope she doesn't fart 
like the last one.
Choked me to death he did!
Oh...no pun intended!
Brought her own pillows too,
teddy bears
A real girly girl this one
She smells like a baby...
I like her!
She gives me a workout!
She's always moving.
Always seem to have visitors...
the docs stay quite a while here too...
She laughs a lot...that's good
Haven't had many laughers
Two surgeries and still moving...
Wow!
She cried a few times
I was her support
Had to...she smelt good! :-)
Was there for the tests,
probes, baths...
she did ok then!
Was there for the Pop's going
...slept like a baby!!
Hmmm...
I'm being stripped!
No more baby soft.
Uuuuuffff....man you is a big fella
....Great you fart!!


Details | Free verse | |

Awakening

I can remember every time 
I've watched the sun rise.
Each time so much
different from the last.
The awakening of the world,
the pulse of it all,
always the same.
I can feel the rumble of her heart
beat right through me.
Oh how I cherish 
these moments of peace.


Details | Free verse | |

I Am A Spark Of Life

A spark of life
Fire in my belly
Giving what I have
Serving you
Honouring, who I truly am
Loving you, in return


Details | Free verse | |

Glow

Stars shine brightly above me as I look up at the glowing full moon.
A cool breeze is blowing and
A soft music seems to play in the air around me as
I think of what life has given me.

This gift is more than I could have brought myself to ask for.
For the longest time I've been content to be there for others
Ignoring the fact that as I helped my friends find happiness, I have been alone.
Now I find that Life has given me a gift. A thing so precious that never again could I go
through life without it.

Life has given me you.
You, Suki, have become my life force. The very thing that keeps me going.
I love you with everything I have. Granted, it isn't much, but I promise you that it wont
be missed. I'll love you enough to make up for the materialistic things that I don't have.

The moon blurs as tears fill my eyes and I start glowing as bright as the shining full
moon above me and
I find that the music I hear around me that is so heartbreaking-ly beautiful isn't in the air.
It's inside me.
 
I never have to be alone again.
Never do I have to bottle things up for the sake of other people because I know I have
someone who wants nothing more than to have me cry on his shoulder.
I love him
And to the very core of my being I know he loves me.

Life has given me something I never dared to let myself dream of having.

Life has given me Suki.


Details | Free verse | |

The Imperfections of Humanity

We are not aware of what we are capable of
nor whether if it's wrong or right.
We sometimes have the will and might
and many of us will stand up and fight.

To show courage and strength
takes determination and motivation.
Wait.....
What am I talking about?

We cheat, we lie, and make mistakes.
We're not perfect in any way.

We weren't made to live forever
but made to live and wilt away.
We suffer through pain and it's hardships
And even sometimes experience love.

Yes, I've had thoughts of suicide
so I can fade away.
Realizing I had issues...
I didn't care.

I've always known who I was inside
and never gave up. 
I'm no philosopher like Socrates
nor do I have a college degree.
But I was raised to be somebody in this world
even if I'm going to fail countless times.

Enough about me.
Lets talk about the human race.

We will get up when knocked down.
We will fight for people we love.
We will live life like it's our last.
We will love ourselves for who we are.

We are only human.
Our imperfections is what makes us perfect.
Therefore, we are perfect in our own little way.


Details | Free verse | |

whats happening to me

I don't know where my days are going

everything is a blur

last I checked it was Monday...

four whole days have passed

where did they go

I don't remember what happened 

or who I talked to

did I go to work

what did I do after

I don't remember sleeping

when is the last time I ate

things are getting out of control

I need to take a break

im wearing myself way too thin

im starting to lose myself

captured in the freezing cold

my own personal hell

everything is confusing

and I cant remember why

im not sure how it happened 

or how long this will last

but something has to happen soon

or this could turn out bad...


Details | Free verse | |

Cartographers of a Multiple's Universe

Setting boundaries, drawing lines,
Mapping the geography of our multiples’ minds

It’s undiscovered, familiar territory,
A continent of islands
And we’re exploring old new low lands,
Uncovering new old high lands

We’re a brilliant yet intimate, large group of strangers
Who are migrating away from stark and harsh dangers,

Together we’re questing safe places
Where we can finally show our faces
We’re regaining our sight
Yearning toward the Light

Abandoning the mal país we’ve always known,
With which we’re too deeply acquainted –
We must leave it behind, if we’re ever to find
The way to become re-acquainted

With who we are, and with our host –
We’ve lived with her for years
Time to bring her great joy and grace
In place of bewildered, bewildering tears

She’s been host to us, now, please, let’s host her?
For as we return the favor,
We’ll become cohesive, we’ll reunite –
And that’s our only way to save her!

Signed: Rebecca’s In-Dwellers
27 May, 2008


Details | Free verse | |

Our Past

Our past is a highway
Flush with mile markers
That measure life travels,
Some unworthy of remembrance;

As life's pages systematically turn
The future becomes liquidated
And past increases;

Nothing is ever purged
And remains our DNA
Unless repelled by memory;
Or God rewrites your past.




















Details | Free verse | |

Love Hurts - The Symptoms

Thoughts displaced by rolling palpitations,
From left to right grow these numbing sensations,
A face which spirals down, drooping from smile to frown.

Time hibernates in this moment protracted,
Legs bow and shake to our drama just acted,
Senses into overdrive, does pain show you’re still alive?

Oxygen masks, Coxes’ rowing commands,
Heart beat machines is what love demands,
“You need time to relax”, prescriptions from Quacks,
Is love just a commonplace heart attack?


Details | Free verse | |

A Hospital Stay - Part II

                                                                  2.

                                                    The Light Returns

I feel myself oh so slowly rise
Through the Abysmal black of surgical sleep
Wakening, drawn to the distant sound
Of my own moans.  

When my lids flutter back
Sight is rewarded with the prescence of all my Beloveds
Gathered in conclave 'round my I.C.U. bed;
My travel-companion souls
Who bear the love and light that leads my own.

     The doctor enters bearing good tidings;
     The beast within was found and slain,
     Its loss complete
     At the sacrifice of nearly the whole of my stomach.

And so I lay grateful and gutted,
Though within it felt like the aftermath 
Of worlds in collision.
A wreakage within,
And when they make me rise for the first time the very next day,
I feel a slow tide of broken glass and metal
Fall in chaos through my new internal spaces.

Still, its a lovely thing to be rising,
At all.


Details | Free verse | |

''The Hope Bridge''

~Gentle soul,I see you.
Pure as the day of first sight.
Channel away all of your silent woes.
I hear the whispers that call out to me.
I wait for the wake of your eyes.
Never will hope escape my loving heart.
Forget this pain.
Come home now,out of the darkness.
I am forever patient~


Details | Free verse | |

Shotgun

Red raw 
Featureless flesh 
No eyes to see
No nose to smell
A hole for a mouth
Tubes to feed and breathe…

…Survivor of shotgun suicide*


For Ann's Suicide contest

*based on a tragic photograph I once saw


Details | Free verse | |

Hippocrite's Oath

Hypocrites’ oath

Dirt-cheep  government clinics  treat death
And disease just like they are  dirt and refuse
Which in a way is just about  fine.

Today’s  multi specialities,  housing as they are ,
A subtle tree branching off into labs,
A stethoscope hanging from every crotch of its,
Pre-set to prescribe a slew of tests whether it’s
Common cold or cancer,
Ninety-year-old or child,
Sugar coating their contempt for the medically illiterate
By glorifying life and ridiculing death and selling it to us
For a vulgar price, often a fortune for a sniffles.

How would they not? When folks  are willing
To sell off  homesteads to treat a harmless swelling.

Here, in one such, folks sit cursing their ‘fate’ology
Before a board which says Neurology
Like the rare cucumber slice floating about
In  its chic eatery’s sambhar* hot. Thinking of how, once out,
They  could wear the physician’s famous name around
Like a red and yellow flower garland
Bought at the wayside stall at a price, a hundred 
Times over what the farmer who  grew them got .

The good old physician seems gone, genial , suave,
Sitting in his modest office, respecting  your illness, 
Your money and the Hippocrates’  oath more than you
Which the new crowd  misspell as Hypocrites’ oath too
Not because they did not pass the spelling bee
But  acquired  the all important degree
And  an incurable greed for money.

11th Sept 14
Form: free verse


Details | Free verse | |

Ignorance meets Insanity

Seriousness settles in, like an old friend
Seriousness spreads like a disease
Infecting us, accelerating, our aging process 
Our youthfulness, our playfulness, slowly slipping away
Our wonder in life, diminishing
Seriousness leading to rigidness, pathway to small mindedness!

Days and years, rolling into one
Colourless, lifeless, mundane, dull and boring
“What day is it?”
“Don’t smile or your face might crack!”
Judgemental, cantankerous!
Pompous attitudes, of modern day man

Stubbornness and ignorance, clinging to what’s familiar
Seriousness, up tightness, humourless, imagination vanished, pathway to madness!
The mind focused on its self created drama’s
Fears constantly being stimulated, from our outside world
Personal insecurities, constantly being triggered, inside
The past lives on, the present forgotten 
What was once important, now, left on the back burner
Hard headed, victim orientated
Righteous, self absorbed
Emptiness, hollowness, helplessness

Seriousness and ignorance, walk hand in hand
Becoming, our best friends
The vampire suckers of vitality
Sucking the life, out of our personal goals and childhood dreams
Lose of faith, gradually, losing our way
Lost, amongst the thick of it
Not knowing any different
Everything becoming an illusion
Seeing things as it should be
In our own little universe, no one else’s!

Entrapment of the mind
Our, personal intelligence, laying dormant
Body and mind, riddled with dis - ease
Heart beating hard, starving for a substance, we call love
Numb, to the outside
Numb, on the inside
Desensitized!
Going crazy!
Consumed with our own self created loneliness and separation
Ignorance meets insanity!


Details | Free verse | |

Yesterday - Today - Tomorrow, Get Me Out of

Yesterday,
I forgot to take my pills.
Today,
I forget to take my pills.
Tomorrow,
I will forget to take my pills.

Yesterday,
I felt fine (with only a slight headache towards the end of the day).
Today,
I feel okay (but I don't really feel anything).
Tomorrow,
I will feel everything (and won’t be able to shake it off).

G G
E E
T T

M M
E E

O O
U U
T T

O O
F F

T M
H Y
I
S

P H
R E
I  A
S D
O !
N
!


Details | Free verse | |

Meditation

Cross your legs, relax.
Bend the knees and shut the lids,
Cease the showing light.

The light inside is stronger,
Its presence hard to find.
So let the journey begin.

Fear, it lies crouched, waiting,
When the inner gates are struggled,
Barred in stubborn stance.

What will one do?
Turn and flee away?
Or face the limits?

A limit to yourself,
Do not be fooled.
Concentrate.

Unlock the door,
Float on in,
To feel the mist that surrounds, ENVELOPS.

Once gone you can see,
See with level eyes,
As meditation makes be.


Details | Free verse | |

Peace

Life deals a tough blow,
Cards of fate seem stacked against you.
Pressures of life pile on thick,
The weight of the world, burring you deep.
Love is not your forte,
No good can you see.

Pause in your thoughts and open your eyes,
Take a look around you, what do you see?
Mountains of rubble, built up to the sky,
Cesspits of rubbish, cluttering the street.
Black clouds of doom, hovering above,
A bird hanging on for life, as the wind sways his branch.

Now close your eyes, and take a deep breath,
Look again at what you see, through eyes refreshed.
Mountains of rubble, their testament to ability,
Cesspits of rubbish, dancing with energy in the street.
Black clouds not of gloom, but filled with life,
A bird in the tree, enjoying the energy of the wind.

From the worms under foot, to the birds up above,
Look beyond your first glance, see with your heart.
From the smallest of things, ugly and course,
To largest of entities, glorious in sight.
Take the time to see, the beauty within,
To find the energy to heal, your peace will then begin.


Details | Free verse | |

The Stench of You

I smell regret!
I smell it on your clothes
and in your hair,
on your hands
and in every stitch, 
every fiber,
every twist and turn in the path of your goddamned
chugga-chugga-choo-choo'ing
train of thought,
and it is especially noticeable in the carpet,
but then again,
that could just be the milk I spilled
when I caught a big fat whiff of the aforementioned regret...


Details | Free verse | |

THE EXPRESS

Walking know-where is somewhere, walk-on
Having so much of a thing in something equals satisfaction
Words trigger existing Miracles within, you are the Miracle
man can justify every act, this God knows.
So to all He gifted brains to think, use it.
If need be, GOD you will see alive
Peace here might elude but never when gone in Truth
Death overwhelms, yours you would never know
Love the Sinner you are not the judge, GOD is.
If you feel you have been here before then you have, 
right the wrongs to glow Divine.
Came in fast and disappeared,
Let not the pursue of Wealth sweep Health

©Kofi Asokwa-Nkansah


Details | Free verse | |

Free time

Day too long been pilin' up
so when you smile me up
and down to my bones
ta hell with the phones and loans

groans and moans trump hands down.
Where ya been, outa town?
Who cares those eyes, oh my
pecs and gluts, ceps and thighs...

enfold me embrace me
hold on tight and face me
naked as you are in
unabashed tenderness

tongue flicks enmeshed with
grips kneading our flesh
in togetherness despite all
we feel at one with god's

creation.


Details | Free verse | |

EVE AND I

Deaf to my concerns and pleas,
They pried out the staples, too soon,
And I ripped open, spilling bright red
across the cold, maternity room floor,
Feeling butchered and ignored
as my shocked incision spread.

At home, motherhood is field dressed,
Feeling my 42 years, I cradle my miracle as
a kind, young nurse packs me with gauze. 

I calm the bundle in my arms, 
Softly singing as, yet again, pain grips,
Claws scoring my raw, parted flesh,
Yet I give – not receive – a soothing balm.

My gaze shifts from my dozing girl
to my exposed lower half, surprised,
Yet unfazed, realizing what it is to be born woman.

We are stronger than the earth’s pull,
But as soft as a newborn’s milky sigh,
Eve and I, riding agony’s waves while 
Comforting our children’s cries.      




By Cyndi MacMillan, January 9, 2012-01-09
For Nette Onclaud’s Age Contest





About this poem

After three, very long days, I finally gave in and had a C-Section. I knew, I just knew, I wasn’t healing. The unsympathetic nurse told me that if I wanted to leave the hospital with my baby then I’d better just let her take out the staples. So, she did. And ten minutes later I, literally ripped open. They do not re-suture you. They pack you with gauze for seven weeks. My parents had passed away, and there was no one to help with the baby. While the homecare nurse took care of my wound, I took care of my girl. One day I had an epiphany. Here I was, comforting this baby, soothing her, while I was naked from the waist down with a woman stuffing cloth into a six inch gap in my lower belly. Needless to say, it hurt, a lot. Yet I felt like I could do anything at that moment, as though I could move a mountain. While pulsing with pain, I felt powerful, whole, blessed. It is a memory I will forever cherish.


Details | Free verse | |

Geeky Boys and Busty Girls

In the little town called Cleveland
Some many years ago
In a high school gymnasium
Met a group of girls and boys
Since early in their childhood
They were plagued by many peers
Because they lacked
The perfect look
Like many other kids

After many years of torture
Constant badgering from everyone
They decided was time to take a stand
Claiming freedom once again
The group contained the branded
The freaky geeky boys
The girls slightly on the heavy side
A few all rolled in one


They called their club the meeting 
Of freaky boys and busty girls
Requirement was be outcast 
From the preps the jocks “the toys”
They arranged a simple protest
Simple protest most fun
To prove that being different 
Is not so bad and can be fun

They stripped down to nothing
But a smile on every face
And marched the halls of Cleveland High
In unison they did say
Though we may all look different 
Inside we’re all the same
So accept us if you will or not
We’re happy just the same

The faculty at the school that day
We outraged by what they saw
Forty teenage girls and boys
Marching naked down the hall
Parents quickly contacted
Expulsion all around
For the kids labeled freaks and geeks
Their victory it was found

Though the protest was very different
The idea quite deranged 
Respect was granted on that day
For the group with guts to say
Being different is not so different
Can be cool they all proclaimed
For the geeky boys and busty girls
Were proud for each that day

The moral of this story 
Though odd but very true
Though outside one looks different
Inside the pages read so true
Looks aren’t that important 
But the hearts all beat the same
We are all just like 
The kids 
From Cleveland high that day


Details | Free verse | |

Maybe One Day

Maybe one day I will not remember my own name.
Maybe I will forget every memory.
Maybe one day I'll forget how to breathe.
Maybe one day I will just end up a broken part in an antique store.
Maybe one day I'll forget love's painful scorn.
Maybe one day I will forget to see.
Maybe one day I'll fly away.
Maybe I'll forget the pain.
Hopefully I'll forget that before my own name.


Details | Free verse | |

You Never Knew Me

You never knew me 
for who I really was
you saw me at my weak point
You never knew 
how strong I was
in my loves and hates
You never saw my talent
they're coming back stronger now
You never saw my true outer beauty
My spirit was dying
the effort was dying
living a lie
and dying on the inside


This will be my second make over
but only this time it will be complete
my appearance
my friends
my god
my likes and dislikes
my inner most power
and the fight I have
to stand up for what I believe in
No one's gonna tear me down this time


Details | Free verse | |

Addie's Mum

Please close your eyes and listen
You’ll hear them all around
Your angels stand beside you
They watch and hold your hand

Their beauty is so awesome
It’s something to behold
Feel their presence near you
And let them take control

You’ll soon be feeling better
Your health their main concern
So close your eyes and listen
And know you’ve not alone.


Details | Free verse | |

I Do Not Want to be Napoleon

                   about veteran of the war
                    who has schizophrenia

    I hear again and again voices.
    They come to me from nowhere.
    I try to close my ears.
    It doesn't help,  the noises are there.

    I am proud; I want to be a winner.
    Sometimes, I am Napoleon, the Commander.
    But, I am lost; I am a loser...
    It is then I feel I am no one.

    The doctor said it is illness
    Always in sorrow and sadness.
    Imprisoned in my brain.
    I am tired from hallucinations.

    I don't really want to be Napoleon.
    Want to be healthy and willing to be happy,
    I don't want to be anyone else.
    I want to be a normal human being.


Details | Free verse | |

Learning to live with it

I used to think the Pain
 
Would never
 
Go away
 
It was an unwanted
 
Part of me
 
Part of my bones
 
Part of my soul
 
I used to wish
 
That I would die
 
Not to stop living
 
But to stop hurting
 
My fragile world would
 
Threaten to fall
 
Apart
 
Each time I heard
 
“You’ll just have to learn  
 
To live with it”
 
But the amazing thing is that
 
I have -
 
And now
 
When the pain comes
 
It’s still a part of me
 
But it doesn’t control or
 
Define me
 
My soul wants to
 
Live now
 
And my world isn’t as
 
Threatening
 
As it
 
Used to
 
Be. 


Details | Free verse | |

Sting to Sing

Star dust;
red powder on your lips
in the creases lit
against the moon...

Shadows luminescent;
rose water breath
and a needle to sew
the Milky Way closed...

You step to edges of mountains
and check the pulse of black expanses
with star dust,
rose water,
ink eyes and padded fingers...

Red powder on your lips
and the wailing songs of eternity
running through your veins.


Details | Free verse | |

Only Words

  words sometimes seem inadequate
   when someone has deceased 
    words sometimes seem inadequate
     when someone's world has fallen apart
      words sometimes seem inadequate
       when someone is struck with an incurable illness
        words  sometimes seem inadequate
         when all hope seems to be lost
           words sometimes seem inadequate
 but....with words we convey our understanding
showing that we care.



Details | Free verse | |

Cost

I snarl, bite and twist
tearing truth from rigid lips
cracked by virulent vapors
the kindling of Jesus’ manger
burning like a rancid piece of meat
diseased depravity tossed at hungry, mottled feet
as homeless children scour for a glass of truth
drinking from gourmet gutter water
polluted by profitable wonders
like sound proof autos
equipped with directions to political fundraisers
which promise compassion under a Chablis chuckle
So is ambivalence ambition’s bane
languishing like an innocuous acid rain
stinging Aids victims who are wasting without sleep
offering them a cheaper mortgage rate
as CEO’s build a better GNP
numbers sold to edify the American dream
suburbia draped in red, white and blue
never colorblind, merely imbued
like picket fences, family values, and barbeques
that perhaps someday it could be me and you
whether fighting tyranny here or abroad
sacrificing for the most worthy cause
that you’re never truly a patriot
until you pay the cost


Details | Free verse | |

Metronome Midnight

I can’t sleep
Thorny thoughts teeming
Feral fangs of conscience
Rabid with impatience
Questioning my answers
Because I have none

I can hear it prey
On my amniotic sanity
Salivating the palatable silence
Metronome midnight
Pounding my constricting chest
With an unmerciful thirst
To feast

I feel
Ravaged and discarded
Like a mangled core of Eden
Speckled with blindness
Desecrated with fate
Opaque prophecies
Of disheveled doom
And earth

I lie in sweat 
Cold, bereft
Concrete voices grinding
The aniseeds of distress
Blanketing me with torment
Devouring any hope
Of putting my mind to rest


Details | Free verse | |

The Miracle of Green Tea

Fresh virgin leaves
Green as the dewy grass
Hiding a golden miracle
As it meets warm water
Soothing to the core
As it uncurls and spreads
A ray of morning light
In every sip
A little sweet
And then a bit bitter
Caressing dry lips and throat
Purifying the soul within
The miracle of green tea
11/3/13


Details | Free verse | |

Sweet Sweet Lorrayne { Rondel}

<                                          Sweet sweet Lorrayne
                                            No voice to speak
                                            Smile always peaked
                                            Just wanted to end her pain

                                         
                                            Known to one and all
                                            Cookies cakes she loved to bake
                                            Orders were never to small
                                            Family tradition she wanted to make


                                            Meds and revival she wanted nil
                                            Family and friends held her hand
                                            Assured she would wake in the promise land
                                            Lit a candle and placed it next to cross in window sill
                                            Oh ye hearts tears did over ~ flow and fill
                                     

                                  


Details | Free verse | |

Hypocrisy

Hypocrisy
When someone prevents another 
from doing something
Whom he practices

Sitting with the girls
Chatting them up
Guess who stops by to say hi
The Hypocrite
He tells me to stay away from them
Protective like a pimp
How is that hypocrisy?
He sits with girls every day
So much he should get paid
Going out with the girls
Doing drugs with the girls
I try to go for mine
But hypocrisy gets crammed down my throat
If I meet a girl
Not taken by this hypocrite
I'll do it myself....


Details | Free verse | |

Know Your Value Princess

Too many damn women selling themselves cheap today.
     Pick up your chin and wipe that tear away.
          Stop living in the shadow of that man,
               who continues to bring you down.
                    Be your own captain,
                         and put back on your crown.
                               Start focusing on you,
                                    No need to second guess.
                                         Remember your value-
                                              It's priceless!
You used to have big dreams.
     Why else would you go to college?
          Now your goals are downstream,
               and wasted are the diploma and knowledge.
                    You used to add a touch of make-up,
                          and wear cute dresses.
                               Now you make up excuses,
                                    and second-guesses.
                                         Now it's time for a new you Princess.
                                              So repeat after me,
                                                    "I know my value and it's priceless!"


Details | Free verse | |

Moved

facing the first time
her wheel-chaired son on the move
saddest vale of tears

driving his wheelchair
his face splashes happiness
enjoying his ride

watching two people
having their own point of view
I can relate to

we meet now and then
all those years I saw his smile
ten inspiring years 

an impressive guy
cleaning his second wheelchair
for tomorrows ride 

Note: 11.30.2012: message from his wife: "I did not expect my husband to be "on the internet' in such a unusual and also very special way. You have touched me very  deeply with your poignant poem.  Thank you so very much."


Details | Free verse | |

Licking Tears

what better love
what truer devotion
that my love who sits as close as he can get
waits as long as he can
then licks the tears falling from my cheeks
carefully tenderly
he ministers

his eyes dont leave mine
his paw holds me still
he's not done
sobs concern him
he lowers his head and his brows furrow
what to do

in a minute, in a minute
he waits patiently
knowing things are not right 
he stands guard

true love
true devotion


Details | Free verse | |

Inter States of Being

"What are these people

doing in my living

room?"

 

A querulous, trembling,

serious query

 

furrowed anxious brows

 

fear floods

        his toes –

 

"What are they doing

         here?"

 

The people who weren’t there just

watched him,

arms crossed

motionless

silent

 

They just stood there

 

        and watched him

 

Across the room,

across wide, saddened, tear-drenched miles,

 

A sister

   calls 911

 

from another state

of mind than his

 

He’s afraid of them –

 

She’s afraid for him –

 

                                               Helpless


Details | Free verse | |

Challenges of Parenting

I was barelegged with you in a field this morning.
You couldn't have been a day past five. 
It was I who helped you navigate the long grass,
the dips in the soft, unseen turf,
you who found the ripe blackberries,
spread across your face like war paint.

Or was it your high school?
You walked off the grounds for the last time,
a sheet of paper pressed between leather 
under your arm as your  books always were,
I wore a simple floral top and black slacks,
a proud smile that just wouldn't come off.

I can’t recall. But no matter.

It's 4 o'clock , another sunny Monday, 
that day after Thursday,
when that kind young man
who looks so much like you
always brings warm apple pie
just the way I like it. 

He should smile more often.


Details | Free verse | |

STAY ON CHEER

These pass years, I have been in a quest..
There are times I want to stop but I guess..
If steps and risks aren't taken, I'll be waste..
Thus, I try and try slowly not in haste..

To become a Saint, one must be chaste..
To become a hero, must death be faced?
To become renown, must fame be chase?
However, to be love, must one be on same race?

Building long lasting & steadfast relationships..
Will require from you more than stewardship..
Even more than a deal of companionship..
And more than just friendship..

It takes the right time...
Sometimes months extending to years..
Or a whole of a lifetime..
Only God knows yet stay on cheer..

By: olive_eloi
5:29pm
10/10/2013


Details | Free verse | |

The Dying Limb

So tightly squeezed shut
Is the flow to healthy flesh,
That might by your release 
Ramble back and return again.

The tireless dancer sends an echo,
Desperate, pressing,
Pulsing into the vice
So far from home.


Details | Free verse | |

The Image Of Being In Need

The Image of Being In Need

My eyes are covered in gauze,
from dirt scratching 
both of my corneas.

My boyfriend leads me around
otherwise I'd find myself on my 
knees feeling the ground.

He takes care of me
and tends to my needs.

He accidently squirts 
ear wax cleaner
into my eyes instead 
of my prescribed 
eye drops.

Oh the pain,
I thought would 
drive me insane.
No apologies either!

He picks my clothes out
and helps me dress,
too close for my
comfort.

The humility found in 
depending on another
for survival was not high.

So glad I'm looking
for a new guy now,
the image of me
depending on him
for a lifetime
is not a good one.

For he left me
feeling more like
a burden then
a friend in need,
to me that
makes him 
a bad seed
for me.


Details | Free verse | |

Pain

I used to think the Pain 
Would never 
Go away
It was an unwanted 
Part of me
Part of my bones
Part of my soul
I used to wish 
That I would die
Not to stop living
But to stop hurting
My fragile world would 
Threaten to fall 
Apart
Each time I heard
“You’ll just have to learn  
To live with it”
But the amazing thing is that 
I have -
And now 
When the pain comes
It’s still a part of me
But it doesn’t control or
Define me
My soul wants to 
Live now
And my world isn’t as 
Threatening 
As it 
Used to 
Be.  


Details | Free verse | |

Cottage Memories

I remember the days when I was young,
Each summer my parents would rent a cottage,
A place away from the busy city,
Usually the cottage would be near a lake,
Supervised and safe to swim,
The handsome lifeguard would be nearby,
We would go swimming in the calm waters,
There was a limit as to how far we could swim,
My parents and I became good swimmers,
We could hear the sound of the birds singing in the morning,
Our cottage was comfortable,
There was a beautiful simplistic kitchen,
Where you could cook your meals,
That reminded me of the pioneers and their simple way of living,
Discovering that all again was such a blessing,
Conversations with neighbours and friends,
A vacation with God's blessing.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

The Blating Fawn

Where is that blating?
Looking all around 
Trying to find the source

It sounds like a kid crying for its dam
Nowhere in sight is the evidence of the sound
Turn and look once more

From the direction of the babbling creek
Down where the Paper Birch stands
Skirted in native Bamboo

Where the coolness is so inviting
To a weary soul
Come sit, relax, enjoy the ions that refresh

The sound gets much louder there__
Then in the exact spot looking
There comes Rocky carrying a fawn

The fawn with his polished cleft small ebony hooves
Attached to his very long abnormal looking legs
Legs that are swinging back and forth for Rocky had him in the nape of his neck

This dappled child of the doe
Calling for its mother to come
To this day I can still hear his cry! BaMa.......

(OUr Rat Terrier who is fourteen years old
was diagnosed with an enlarged heart yesterday..
The vet say is treatable and he should live several
years..Just a memory of when he was young.)


Details | Free verse | |

Daddy's A Workaholic

Daddy’s a workaholic...
But what about the hospital stay... the loss of blood,
his ashen dignity
Slight prate about moving into a veteran’s home

Only in his young eighty’s
Workaholics don’t quit
Laboring healthward

So the tiller cranks for cultivating
and the garden is sown, 
yet during it's interval of growth
he’s... vigorously active 
delivering the ‘elderly’ to appointments

While taking pride in saplings
he's gathering and transporting the yield

And I, plop down on my patio swing 
imbibing a cappuccino
Thinking “What a ‘workaholic’ my daddy is”!


Details | Free verse | |

Positive Thinking

Positive thinking is a 
beautiful way of thinking,
where you see goodness
in every kind of dealing.

Positive thinking can 
lead you to success.
It gives you the joy
you can easily access.

Hope for the best
in all your deeds.
You will be awarded
with the highest gifts.

Whatever happens 
happens for the best.
In this way you 
are always blessed.

Positive thinking makes 
you confident and strong.
It shows you ways where
 you can never be wrong.

Quote: "Think positive and positive things will happen"


Details | Free verse | |

False Diagnosis

On the edge of my seat,
On the tip of my chair,
Sweating in the Doctor’s Lair,
Waiting for that sympathetic stare
And the news
That my slack heart
Needs a jump start,
Liver fails to deliver,
Blood is clogged
With choleric cholestrol,
Kidneys are more cesspit,
Than filtration device,
Belly fluff is full of lice,
Tonsils are shot
With boasting bacteria
Roller-coasting
Down my gullet
To a soirée
In the small intestine.
Inwardly I scream
And await the death sentence
On my organs.
She’ll tell me that
The years of gorgonzola
Gormandising and
Elevated caffeine intake
Have condemned me
To an early coffin-break.
Oh my aching mind!
I can feel the blinds
Descending and my
DNA un-mending.
The worms are wriggling
Down my spine
When the doctor says
“You’ve got a bit of a cold,
You’ll be fine.”


Details | Free verse | |

Fainting

Fainting

My heart,
how you betray me,
rogue rhythms
steal my conscious
thoughts...
Darkness
embraces.
Only hope
awakens
me.

rlm


Details | Free verse | |

The Man Who Spoke in Whispers

(for Jim Ducker)


The growth plundered your voice,
robbing it of tone; you spoke
in well-articulated whispers, inhaling
through that tube thing in your throat.

You shone, in spite of it all.
No self-pity, even near the end,
after years of speaking to us
in breaths the way you did –
yet you had a voice, old friend.

Always the bright guy at the bar,
you brought a twinkle
even to a whisper; a susurrus of wit
would penetrate the tedious tones
of those for whom EastEnders
and the latest from The X Factor
provided fodder for barroom babble.

Struggling to be heard but stubbornly
winning with smiles and quips,
you were never less than sparky
with your crackling one-liners
and the percussion of your Good Advice.

Quite suddenly you died;
thirteen months ago you died.
You would not wish me to reach
for a soppy synonym.
You did not pass away:
you died, you died, you died.

I handled your affairs –
so long ago, it seems;
but time and distance are
such fragile things, and grief
is no respecter of them:
whisper its name
and it will return to you.


Details | Free verse | |

The Miracle

The baby lay on her bed,
A satin soft pillow under her head,
Pretty, pretty little brown eyes,
Rose bud mouth to say, "bye, bye".

There was no doubt that she was ill,
Skin so pale as she took her pill,
Soft brown eyes no longer happy,
Rose bud  mouth to weak to cry.

Sweet little fingers quiet and still,
Golden curls wafting 'round her face,
Tears rolling down her parents' cheeks
For they had been praying for two, whole weeks.

Then the miracle happened, late at night,
God spared her the Dark Angel's might,
Sweet little lips, now laced in smiles
As once again, she shows her wiles.











Details | Free verse | |

The Anatomy of What Disgusts

A stoma and a scar 
like the Grand Canyon
form a conspiracy 
against my body. 
The stoma--raw and 
fleshy--looks like a red 
and beefy barnacle on 
my side that constantly 
oozes and drains feces 
and waste like an 
overflowing, backyard 
cesspool. It sickens me.

Near the red and moist 
stoma lies a huge, 
crooked scar on my 
stomach and abdomen. 
It is like the Grand 
Canyon of Arizona--an 
immense displacement 
of the local landscape, 
only instead of earth 
and rock and soil it is 
my skin and muscle 
and tissue that has been 
gouged away. Like my
stoma, it sickens me as
well. Because of them
both, my body now
feels to me like the 
raw anatomy of 
what's disgusting.


Details | Free verse | |

After the Breakdown on Rat Race Road

Use at your own risk!
Recommend durable tires
and a durable psychology. 
I know, I know, I know
that I can't live 
through it again.
That's why I'm walking, 
watching my feet
in my red-rubber shoes.


Details | Free verse | |

Chemotherapy

Hand on the rail
head bent
sit in the chair
false cheer.
she turns away
asks for a screen
no company no dialog
chemotherapy


Details | Free verse | |

Sun Bleats

That which would make me a cog in the machine , 
dragoon me into a lethal automaton
	be left in the walls of sleep.

As the sun bleats in fear of crowds &
the sparrows call w-/in a ring of fire.
	Let the world spin on thru space's 
quagmire sinking ships in the velvet ink 
	on the writer's hand. Or let the 
chase end w-/ hands holding crystal ducks &
 chunks of lung, held by the prism of 
	your stare.

	To dance swirling down the drain 
as another matter for the brain to tick 
as a clock tocks out seven days to review 
& recall all infected packets of nurofen.

	Prescribing Anti-psychotics for a mild case
of the flu while the fever dreams strike 
	drowning in clay & blank doll faces.

As my daughter will drink only the finest wine 
& my son will make all the other children cry 
w-/ the malice of his fingers.
	
	In the first flash of a passionate love
affair , feather light, beating as two hearts 
revolve round the moon lit stage. 


Details | Free verse | |

10 years

disheartened array of melancholy verbiage
 I didn't have enough details to cover ground
so I stayed ignorant of my internal complications
exploding with tears and sounds I've never 
made before you were found
lacking apparent decency to mourn a soul proper
I refused to take any absolutes' offer
that psychic that lied meant little, much less
than the countless times people asked me
Where is she?
The biggest achievement of my life
unawares to those who've never wore my shoes
I am grateful I've made it through,
 and hope those who have yet to suffer such as I
will find blessings at the end of such journeys
What a long road
I can see further in one direction in than the other
but I know, this road is only as long as two points.
Pack my suitcase and leave at the door
I won't be needing that, to walk the streets
Medicine wore off and I had to find a new meaning to my memories
living off of instinct 
What is it like to have no sense of truth from the
writhing of delusion snaking in and out of solid
turning your past into a guessing game?
How many people live in here?
This would redefine the way of living.
I am just a bystander, but oh so intimate
It hurts me to see 
Where can I find a relief? 
All logic and reasoning tell the tale of predictability
She the most stable she is ever been in her life
Yelling at a social worker about being hearing impaired
after the lady was just trying to point out she doesn't seem it
and she was eligible for arts and crafts
Worries, anxiety, mistrust
paranoia, grandiose theories and destructive habits
Inspires me of my own
no one is invincible
Tattoo that on my face and I still will cry guilt
face pain to the point where I only have my love
nothing else matters as much as having her again
after 10 years


Details | Free verse | |

Mystical

Mystic
What is this word?
Cryptic, hidden, magical.

Just like the things 
All around us everyday
Just like the creatures
From beyond time
The creatures from fairy tales.

The fire-breathing dragons
Who horde their treasure
Can be seen within everyone
As determination.

The majestic unicorn
With it's horn of wisdom
Will be stabled in you mind
In years to come.

The noble griffin
So strong and proud
Is like our father 
With pride in his eyes.

The caring phoenix
With tears of healing
Remind me of
Our mothers heart

Is mystic such a word
We use only to describe tales?
I think mystic can be seen
Each and every day
In all of us

We portray 
The mystical creatures
The creatures inside ourselves. 


Details | Free verse | |

ode to diphenhydramine.

we finally find the small aisle, the one i've been searching for.
pass the pink liquids and big white pills
and stop at the little blue ones.
look! you can get 50 caplets for $4.99.
Five dollars for twenty-five nights of sleep.
I do a restrained dance and compare prices.

the cashier does not know she holds
a near month of happy nights for me.
she tosses them in the bag with the chicken,
i jump. 

when we return home i put them down,
in an elevated space - the fruit bowl. 
and i stare at them for hours
until the clock finally flips over to 10pm.

i dream about dinosaurs in aeroplanes and
beautiful women drinking whiskey with me.

when i awake, the sky is gray and i am out of coffee.
in the excitement i had forgotten
that i'd still have to get out of bed.


Details | Free verse | |

-Headache-

In total darkness
my head is pounding
pain lurking in the back of my eye lids
body's weak

Stomach is nauseous
shivering as goose bumps race up and down my body
I toss and turn in bed
unable to relax

Taken four to six pills
cold wash cloth over my head
pillow pulled tight over my eyes
but, nothing seems to work

Ways to cure my pounding head
control my breathing, calmly in and out
clear my mind, slowly falling asleep
and vision sweet ecstasy with you in my head


Details | Free verse | |

You Needed Me

Deep in the night, I heard a call of desparate need
No words were uttered, not a sound was made
Was it your heart searching, reaching out for me
Desire was not the issue, passion not at stake
You had fallen ill with fever, your body did ache
A soothing hand, a cool drink and me by your side
Was all that you needed, all that you required
Is this a milestone that we have passed 
As our relationship continues to grow 
I want to be the one to take care for you 
Now and each day as we grow old
Love is more than passion and hunger in the night
Love is being together, someone to hold you tight
To take care of you in sickness and in health
To be at your side forever whatever life does bring 


Details | Free verse | |

A Touched Casino Worker

Yes, he pushed me onto a conveyor belt. He is one of my co-workers. For no reason at all, he pushed me. It happened right in the casino. I am here to file a criminal complaint. His behavior should not be tolerated. I have a right to file this complaint. Who cares if I have witnesses or not? God is the only witness I need. God saw him push me onto the conveyor belt. A woman’s word is better than a man’s word. It happened where we both work. It occurred right here in Atlantic City.


Details | Free verse | |

Mirrors

That girl
With a thinning
Frame
Dangerously
Small arms
Cracking posture
Frail bones
Is not who you think
She is.

She does not 
Go home
And take in
The compliments
Of the 
Oblivious
Unknowing
JEALOUS
Girls at school.

She cringes
The reflection
Disgusts her 
Yet they are
Everywhere.
The mirrors
That she cannot
Escape.

They lurk 
In the dark
In the light
In the day
In the night
In the bath
And in the eyes
Of the 
Passerbys.

But what she
Sees
Is not 
Tiny
Withering.
She sees
HIPS TOO WIDE
  THIGHS TOO THICK
     WAIST TOO BROAD
        ARMS TOO SOFT

T O O - M U C H - F A T.


Details | Free verse | |

To Bare My Bones

Sometimes I visit pro-anoretic 
things

Out of curiosity
Out of concern
A desire to relate?
A strange urge to study the 
sick.

Am I one of them?

But every time
The more thinspiration
Self-motivation
And self-hatred that I see,

The hungrier I get
The more I feel my waist
The more I notice the softness 
of my flesh
The pleasant give of my arms
The rolling contrast of my 
proportions
The more I regard “squish” 
With fondness.

And when I feel bone 
Jut through a pillow of body
I regard it with distaste,
As I would a jagged corner
Jutting through a bedroom 
pillow,

This interruption of that which 
is 
Soft and warm and comforting. 
I care little about what look is 
yielded 
By something so thoroughly 
nice to feel, 
Whose presence exists to be 
touched. 

And to delve into boneculture,
A figure so opposite as to repel 
everything,
To repel food is to repel touch
To repel human contact
The basis of humanity
To become inhuman untainted 
by other humans,

Is repellant to me.

Though it is to be said 
That I am able to revel in being 
human,
To have power in my human 
needs
Without need to have power 
over them.

As such
I see my ribs, I feel sick
I wish to cover them
They interrupt my humanness,
To bare my skeleton is to walk 
dead.

I cover them
With muscle, with enough 
Adipose for a nice give,
Whatever I determine that to be,

Because I am alive
And crave contact
And am human
And those things are beautiful.


Details | Free verse | |

stand

these are not desperate times, these are times for contribution 
you are devoid of current circumstance 
and lacking in any forward motion 
if you are looking for more than less 
take any leftover position 
and turn it toward your command 
that is your accomplishment now 
that is your stand 


Details | Free verse | |

Light love

Light becomes the shades of auars hues
 Lasting beauty comes shining through
 Flowing in each feathery knot
 Tied to each heart, radiant glow

 Echoes sounded to and fro
 Silvery angels wings span high
 Shining from heaven above, soft light
 Yearning for each soul  gliding so
 Orbs 

Porcelain Summer butterflies, dancing in cellos wind
 Ephemeral passions igniting my souls passion within
 Angels glide to me, Sullivan skies I see
 Glowing brightly 


My soul calling to you my love
 Thus mellowed through the ages , above
 Faded like amethyst wine
 Kisses filled me with summertime

Ross will fill my heart, Plumes in the each morning dew
 Love is forever my darling Gypsy kissed new
 I will be there to hold you 
My angels eyes

Cocooned in metaphoric I shall rise
 I am your angel , borrowed from heaven above
 To hold you forever untouched lullaby love
 My soul mate you are gathered for all to know


Details | Free verse | |

James Bond's Return

A man of honour and always a distant memory,
Lives as complex as a James Bond novel,
Fates affected by memory
Dreams delegating a love affair that could never be,
He and she colleagues of learning,
Each writing their scripts in their senior years,
Almost royal and regal conceptually,
Some of us live our dreams,
And some of us are blessed with dreaming.


Author:  Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia's Perils

Dedicated to Caregivers who endure lovingly the perils of dementia's grip on loved ones.

Dementia's Peril

Oh tongue of spiked nails, be still, be still!
Bite not off the loving hands that tend you!
Unfair thoughts revolve through the mind
Silently taking it all, never voicing unkind

Declarations from soothing voices should swim
In tempestuous dementia’s waters of bewilderment
Where uncertainty ensnares reasoning’s ability
And constraints of life cascades into the abyss


By:  Debra Squyres  1-26-12


Details | Free verse | |

Assisted Living

Life is down to no-frills necessities
in a room with the chest of drawers,
double bed and television.
The walker stands in the corner
waiting to be used to get to the dining room,
the social activity three times a day.
The nurse's aide, with her lilting Haitian accent,
comes around to check during the day:
time for meds, channel change? a walk
down the hall? a glass of juice?
You know that you mustn’t drive a car.
The house is gone, and so are its furnishings,
let's face it, life is over.
Grandchildren come to visit,
sighs of relief when it's over.
Dreams of the past when life was real
occupy time until dinner and bed.


Details | Free verse | |

The Joy of Nits

Headlouse dance as agile ballerinas across a small childs skull
And believe the truth as im only good at that
I havent seen one for a while

Its hard to confess 
That i actually miss
Foriging the tresses of my little sprigs
Salivating
Eyes dancing
Hither and tither 
To and fro
As if anyone would
Id always know

Where on earth the little devils would go
I know their lifecycle
Lifespan 
And im ever so proud to admit that i can
Spot one
At fifty paces

(The safari Hunt!) 

I used to settle down, comb at hand 
I knew i was at it when i imagined
A safari hat
I was the hunter 
Their stalker
Trapsing through the thick dark forestry of hair
Silent in deep excitement

'THERE! ' Ive got another one

Id chalk up the amounts
leaving bloodied squashed and squelched
Knits pon white tissue
A most satisfactory
Blood count

I was good, i was brilliant 
A most efficient predator
of those nasty
Horrid little blood sucking beasts that chose to feast
On my childrens heads
Id gather up the population
Ensuring they were all 
DEAD! 

(Bet you scratched your head at least once whilst reading this) 


Details | Free verse | |

Old heart

Most times,
old heart,
you're like 
a sultry walking blues;
48 beats per minute
of Muddy or John Lee
shuffling a twelve bar,
never out of rhythm,
classic, lazy,
drowsy 
old man's beat

boom,boom
boom, boom 

boom, boom
boom, boom 

Old heart, 
your beat's 
sometimes like
a vicious bebop chorus;
Coltrane or Parker
blasting a furious solo
as the notes fly up my
chest like bubbles
rising in water
and popping
through the
surface

Old heart,
I don't mind
your bebop
and I love your blues

But please don't
learn any 
techno

Or we're done 

Y'hear?


Details | Free verse | |

You Make Beautiful Things

Usually, I just pass by
with a glance, read their
life story without making
eye contact so my wallet 
doesn’t feel sympathy,
but this time, his cardboard 
sign screamed at my heart.
It was as if his soul breathed 
hope onto what he wraps 
himself in at night.
His cried out eyes
had a thick layer of 
fog over the pupil,
nostrils were cracked,
wrinkles grinned 
dog fur white.
Yesterday, in Palo Alto,
I gave a homeless man 
money,
my freedom only
cost three dollars.


Details | Free verse | |

Breaking Up

Is my body breaking down?
Is it in such disarray?
What is going on?
Why do I feel this way?

My mind is in such turmoil
Of all things going on
I sit here and I wonder
Do I want to keep going on?

My memories always haunt me
And the tears they come again
My body feels so good to me
Why is it breaking down?

My pass has been a hell hole
And if the future will look dim
I will not want to stay here
To me death is no sin. 

It wouldn’t really take much
To end this misery
Just a bit of rope or hose
Or pills to make me sleep

Then maybe it is nothing
And I’ll tread through life again
Threading oh so carefully
Not trusting where its ends

If I could just now, lie right down
And die just right away
Then peace would take my very soul
I would not feel this way.

If all the world could hurt some less
And people could be true
What a wonderous place for us to be
For all of me and you. 


Details | Free verse | |

Traveling By Train

traveling by train
mysterious
you become someone other
unknown as the journey finds you confined
with strangers far too long
distracted by mountains outside my window
I escape and find
the wind


Details | Free verse | |

Listen Body

Listen to me my body
I’m talking to you
Don’t you let me down
Or I’ll be leaving you.
I’ll desert you, you know
I’ll leave you alone
I’ll take my spirit from you
You can turn cold as stone.

They’ll take you away
And stuff you up good
They’ll dig a big hole 
And a cross they will put.
You’ll be food for the maggots
And worms if you please
You’ll rot and you’ll stink
You’ll bloat and be free
One useless caress
Another life gone
One spirit has left you
It’s life to carry on

So make up your mind
Either you stay or you go
But make no mistake
If you stay
YOU BE WHOLE.


Details | Free verse | |

Sunlight's Blessing

You are perfect in every way,
A man I can never have,
Handsome and debonair,
Love a purity that penetrates the soul,
Distinguished and divine,
Flies like a summer breeze,
Refined and sophisticated,
A realm multi-dimensional,
Complex and layered conceptually,
God's chosen blessed with marriage,
I am simply like a monarch butterfly,
Fluttering past a warm wind,
You are like sunlight,
Warm and sometimes hot,
Simply unreachable,
A blessing to mankind.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Schizophrenia

My father held me in his hands,
And told me life was cold,
Daddy can you see me now,
I'm frozen to the bone.

Perched at the window,
Silent wind moves the leaves,
Do you hear the whispers-
Rats scuttling in the eaves...

The fountain and the birdhouse
Are idle- they stopped coming.

Now I'm at my corner,
The window is seething:
Teething, beating,
Creeping, weaving
In and out,
Inhale, exhale,
Drafts of cold wind-
[A solid prism of malice].

The birdhouse is churning my insides-
Grief.

First they fed me sunshine,
And fake smiles for dessert,
Now I fear their faces,
Hands are meant for hurt.

Judgement is reserved for God,
And yet they think they know,
What makes me tick-
Heart, beating, slow.

Four walls keep me unknown,
Segregation- invisible,
Our lives are controlled,
People- divisible.

They told me I was Him,
Fallen in the wake
Of thunder proud and just,
Sent down to Earth
To wreak and surge,
And fill mens' hearts,
With perpetual lust.

They are right.
We all are.

The mind believes in delusions false,
To soothe the pain, and quell the loss-
Of Heaven's kingdom, from mortal men, 
That forever crave the firmament.

Yet some are destined not to know, the joy
Of living so;

For when Hell is born inside of you,
Delusions are many, and desires are few,
It is then that the false becomes real
And the delusions, come true.


Details | Free verse | |

For Just A Song

While a sovereign prince
I visited a sovereign state
Whose name shall remain
For the time being a secret 

I hoped to find a sovereign cure
For a malady that had afflicted
My paramount sovereign ruler
And hampered his dutiful reign

Need I remind you that I, myself, 
Was a royal blooded offspring
Of a sovereign lord? Or that I
Was on a royal mission abroad?

Nonetheless, and that notwithstanding
I traveled abroad on this secret mission
To find this most rare sovereign remedy
Of an even rarer sovereign contempt

The doctor (or to be frank witchdoctor)
Whose sovereign virtue was sovereignty
Had been accorded a rare sovereign right
To explore these rare sovereign remedies

His sovereign- whom he called president-
Was not as preeminent as my sovereign
As you will in due course come to learn
He was of a much lesser breed, I guess

But his people- also of a lesser breed,
Had given him what he called a mandate
Not sovereign power like my monarch
But he was very proud of that mandate

If he had been a Czar, or Emperor or King
I might have reciprocated with a noble bow,
But that is reserved for an indisputable chief
Or heads of powers like the United States

This one had the supreme remedy that I needed
That my sovereign had ordered me to procure
So I bowed quickly, a shorter version, anyway
And then rose again to my full padded height

Upon which I was handed several magic portions
Several thousand carats of gold, diamond, rubies
Several thousand acres of land for my experiments
And several virgins to cure my sovereign’s ailments!


Details | Free verse | |

LEAVE


LOVING ISN'T EASY
HARD TO PLEASE
NEVER SATISFIED
STOP COMPLAINING 

BUILD THE STRENGTH TO LEAVE
HEED THE WARNING SIGNS
STEVIE WONDER LACKS SIGHT
AND HE CAN SEE THE WRITING ON THE WALLS

LEAVE ...
TWO BLACK EYES AND A BUSTED LIP
WILL YOU STAY UNTIL HE TAKES YOUR LAST BREATH
WHAT'S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT
LEAVE HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU....
LEAVE......HE'S UNFAITHFUL 
INFLICTING YOU WITH TEN STD'S
ARE YOU WAITING FOR HIV
HIS PUNCHES TO THE STOMACH HAS CAUSED A
HOMEMADE ABORTION......

LEAVE...CLOSE YOU EARS AND EYES TO THE
INSINCERE CRIES OF SORRY.......
YOU SAY YOU DON'T WANT TO BE LONELY
YOU TRAPPED IN THE DEN WITH A FURIOUS LION
READY TO DEVOUR.....LEAVE..........


Details | Free verse | |

Smokey

spirit hunter,
you stalk the shadow moon
neck straining to uncoil upon diaphanous night

what whisper have you heard
above the creak of batten board
the shiver of a window pane

arched and graceful  is your silhouette
cat eyed guardian
moonlight prowler 
paw prancer

settle the unsettled ones from
fear and in insubstantial light
protect with tooth
and claw your Mother’s
night  



 


Details | Free verse | |

THE GOOD THINGS ABOUT THE REPUBLICANS

I watched the Debate
between Obama and Romney;
I am kind of liberal and fair:
and I listened to both sides.


The Republicans favor broad tax cuts,
the Democrats are opposed. 
As far as prayer in school is concerned,
I favor the Republican Party...
giving some regard to the existence of God....
we can't become a nation of Atheists!


The Democrat Party demands
a specific deadline for the withdrawing of troops from Iraq
and Afghanistan...and isn't that great news for every soldier 
to be coming back home soon?

 
One last comment on abortion:
Republicans are pro-life,
but Democrats are pro-choice...
and for this reason I should vote Republican!


Details | Free verse | |

Surviving the Venal

Surviving the Venal
          by Odin Roark

As we peer into the future
As far as we dare see
There glides effortlessly down entitlement throats
The six o’clock cocktails of gin and vodka
While cups of water appease
Shrunken stomachs in desperation

As after dinner snifters of brandy
Flame amidst knavish whispers of next-day scheming
Prosperity’s throw-aways
Boil tea above dwindling Sterno
Identity’s loss struggles to stay warm 

Evenings of silk and down covered comfort
Remain the usual
As cardboard insulation is adjusted 
Making another night doable
For the other kind of usual

Tomorrow’s few who can make a difference
Seldom venture past their pitiful hubris
Their custom suits and handmade shoes
Grabbing news hour attention
While the needy languish
Through another empty-dish dinner hour

So goes Washington’s plague of indifference
That place where 
Diseases are but for profit
Reality’s ravenous-cries fall on deaf ears
And legislative conscience continues making gestures
Wanting us to believe they’re human

Food stamps for subsistence
May never visit the Hill’s automatons of human representation
Yet we can hope that another kind of hunger for survival
Will ravage their psyche
Come re-election time


Details | Free verse | |

Within Myself

I exist within myself
Signs of an inner prophet forewarn
Of my descending doom
My body is telling me
It is time for rest
Aches and pain
Disease and ills
No pills or creams
Can fix me
I feel my mortality
I know my existence seeps away
Seeping so so far away
I know but choose ignorant
Enjoying what life is left
I live to live
I go to go
I am to be
Onward forward never look back
Smile for the world
Laugh for all others
Love for love
But within I feel
Within I hear
Within I know
Time is my enemy
I exist within myself.


Details | Free verse | |

Psychological grudge of sex and diamonds

Adoloscent confusion
whirlwhind of innocence
taken aback by the hindsight i have
the life i lived and what i know now

puberty
feelings
not knowing whats normal
not knowing who or what is getting the best of you
who to blame when you come unglued

sexual addictions
finaly clear
i miss myself
who i used to love dear
the one i didnt want transformed
into what i understood as an adult
unhealthy, abusive, mean, something to fear

that moment many caught in
stuck in
psychological psuedo science
of your psychological music store guinea pig
pure innocence turned into smut
the cycle continues

the need and desire to express oneself as an individual
as an adult
targeted
the media blamed
talk shown
sex and diamonds
even the rich in chains
i might be craving my own identity
of who i am going to become
the confusion of a future that i might not be
what i think i will be
the fear of what if
and that is the grudge we carry for soo long

puberty and confusion
nothing to do with attractions of what sexes you prefer
the armslengthing of what your society is keeping underneath
underneath the sex and diamonds
of this sinking ship
the one your on
you never let on
the cycle continues
name calling
lost friends
lower self westeem
searching for approval
inbetween the sheets
for this is adult hood
this is aldultry

love the sinner not the sin
innocence held hostage
who gets the blame
you get the blame
psychological grudge of sex and diamonds
kings and queens under your thumb
wont be long til the blind lead the blind
and were onto something else

craving approval
the feeling within needing to be identified known as me
i am not able to leave myself
and i wont
i will stand strong through this war
of psychological anarchy
til i set myself free

i may not know the future of the adult i may become
or the truth of everything in this world
the knowledge of how many people on this boat licking their wounds
by rubbing it in the same salts
and hurting eachother equals nothing solved

sex and diamonds of the media
target of puberty
babysitter of the media that never grew up
to transform into the prince from the frog
so back into the pond
back into the pond
psychological grudge of the masses we all victoms of
sexual addicts
craving to suppress our individuality
cigarettes and drug abuse
when all i wanted was to be me

psychological grudge of sex and diamonds
consumer of denying how unbelievable i be


Details | Free verse | |

Camille

Wake up to find its not just a dream, 
the morning rips a new wound of reality. 
Forever gone, Forever missing, 
All the regrets building up inside of me. 
I could have been better, 
cause you were the best, 
I love you with everything 
now you took your last breath. 
You went, happily 
and chased the birds over that rainbow bridge, 
I hope your watching from above c
ause when you left you took a part of my heart

...RIP My Beautiful Puppy. I Love You Camille Baby?


Details | Free verse | |

MAKING POSITIVE, POSITIVE: Hope Song for PLWHAs


When is positive negative
Or right wrong?
It is when living positive 

I am living positive:
Now, more responsibly
I take responsibility for all my actions;
My life in my hands
I choose life over death
Wellness over sickness

I am a living ‘positive’
Now, more rightly, living and doing 
Surrounded by all that is positive 
I make the best of now
Enjoy this moment, one at a time

I am overcoming positive
With gratitude for everyday mercies
Finding and enjoying beauty and bounties, abound about:
the smile of a child; the chirps of the birds
the swinging music of the street trees;

I am positive; HIV positive
I am a living witness; a survivor of the scourge
I am living, I am positive
Positively positive 

I am a HIV survivor
Beyond the put down of virus 
Above societal  stigma 
I am living, I live
Making positive, positive.



PLWHA- People living with hiv aids


Details | Free verse | |

Perfect

         Perfect!  (Hypochondria?)

I’m not sick.  I’m not ill.  I’m not crazy.  
There is nothing wrong with being perfect.
My mommy told me so.
"illness anxiety disorder" It’s just a label….Just a name
Like thousands of other names that I can’t say, I can’t spell
Such as the thousands of lethal viruses and bacterial pathogens 
Out to get me.  I know they want me.
As they try to get inside to kill me.
They cross my path without a care
Don't even wipe their feet
They are here!  They are there!  They are everywhere! 
So what.  I don’t care.
I quit my job and wife and life to deal with them
And deal with them I will
They won’t find me.  No sir!
I’ll never leave my house again
I hide in disinfectant waters in day
In scalding hot baths and microwave ovens at night
Me and Purdy; Purdy is my sparrow in a hermetically sealed cage
He would sing all day if he were alive today
But he never was.  He never existed
As you can see he is plastic
Plastic birds don’t sing but they are free
Free from infections, infestations, nasty things found in nature
My birdie is sterilized, sanitized, purified…. like me
We wear our hypoallergenic suits and masks
Which, when applied properly, qualifies us as being clean
Keeps us alive for the time being 


Details | Free verse | |

Pride

The real truth is nobody can handle anything
We are all minature soldiers in a routine of stregnth
Some may be used to a faded regime in ardent extremities
Others ponder the ellaborate scheme amidst 
Shadows torn in darkened pavement sought regime
We often will hide behind the false hidden garb of compromise
Twisted logical persuasion bursts through the sky
In our pride we tend to hide behind its mask a handicap
In pursuit of change we vaguely rearrange its ardent mast
Coupled by a porposal amidst tragic events in decay
We then surface amidst the variation of its pitch face down in some ditch
No one ever thinks rationally anymore too stuck up for their own good
In silence one can equate twisted brains in disguise of shallow pools
In retrospect to want we ignore its regard to help
Shades of green grass in illumination breath in oceanic conquest
An eager delight to shout full force inside the equated shape
We then will hide behind a loose decision made in the darkness
~
Through the flood of innocence we negate to tolerate its light
Instead we compromise by living by sight

Shaped our illusional grade of hope!


Details | Free verse | |

What you do not see is not necessarily not there

                              I

 
Take out the caked grimy faucet plug

Let those unseen crawlies dive and duck

                                      under the rust-ridden slime

               stuck to phlegm and saliva globs

        dried blood and flaky semen

               shot through with crap

 

      The seen and the unseeable

      The sane and the goneforsaken

 

This glob of virus    a syruppy eggdash

                got rid of in a hurry

                                       close your thoughts

   to the raw genital-******l whiff of public lavatories

           the brothel closets’ stained sticky sheets

 

  the stink and the dirt and the stinging hell

                                                 that comes from under

       pipes

              tanks

                     drains

                             sewers

                                      rivers

 

   all stuffed with fizzing

                       fuming water

                      cloacal wind

             and the aftershave lotion

 

Nothing that wouldn't burn forever

      when we all disappear

 

                                             II

 

Even if you slow your rhythm down to a stilled beat

                                                                                   at rest

    haven't you heard your blood

                  coursing through in a reckless lickety-split

       past the pinned ear in the pillow

 

The silence of the hour

                                       outside

  your pulse down to a twenty-five or thirty

                                                                     listless

cutaway from the clatterbanging engine within

     gushing

              whistling 

                        throttling 

 wheezing

         jerking

                cartwheeling

           shunting

                      beating a frenzied time

        racing round and round in a cataclysmic din

 

Whoever jams it all from the eye

          hears its thunderous roar in the cells

The cells that slither 

                                 creep

        and ooze

                                                     acidic enzymes

      down the washes of stuffed putrefying canals

 

This the great manufacturer

                                       of what oozes in lethean sewers

 

                               III

 
cell into cells

                  in the coursing blood

    the car jams

                     the myriad alleyway mazes of city cells

 

    heartless

                    traffic-lights

                                              valves that stop

       letpass   

                   white-red corpuscles

 

In the city's centre is the heartless pulsing leviathan

      and through the aorta highway

 

    everybody alights on a wc cuvette

                                                            and back

  through the ventricles   

       the carnival parade of

                   scabies

                             herpes

                                      spittle and slime

 

Die City

    Die like bodies

                                    and empires

        disease-clogged sewers

                                       funding plagues

                                                          pandemics

 

What is left from afar

             is a clouded-over scorched patch

    fossilised cellular forms under the microscope

 

Who cares after a thousand billion years

What went on during a trillion light years

                                                                     ago

I care You care We care

Do All ALL care

 

© T. Wignesan, Paris, 1986 – 87. Rev. 2012 (from the collection : longhand notes : a binding of poems, 1999).


Details | Free verse | |

Druggo

Druggo
Step into a neighbourhood thinking it's the best place in the world
But in every hood, there are druggos with hearts of mould
Hanging out in a secluded part of the school
Or chilling in the park trying to look cool
Weed or coke it all makes me sick
Young or old I think they're all pricks
Drugs break friendships between the good and the bad
Thinking drugs are good that's so damn sad


Details | Free verse | |

Do you care

On the high way
My side mirror recalls
The object that appear
Are closer then 
They seem to be…
Yet so close we are
Taking destiny for ride
Many are a head and 
Many behind, on road
Wondering in this city.
Tales of 1000 souls
I am one of them with little
Blessing to share. 
My believe, My Prayers 
To Lord, is driven by Job
My Visa, my rent, my bills
Run in the veins of my day.
Morning, I do open my eyes 
Only to report to job, 
My wife, my children and my God
Await my return by night.
I recall not, what I did last night
When I slept, what my wife said,
Not even my child’s smile
Yet my 9 to 5 schedule is perfect
Morning open with coffee on gas stations
Traffic on highways, on city road
Fines and radars, mobiles and overspend
Frustrated yet have to drive a head
Slow in fast lane with mobile on ear
Or lady, prejudice it may seem
But I recall it in my car, another
Guy flying in his accord, reads a sign
“just cruising”, damn with smile.
Switching between channels, 
Some jams, some songs to hear
Discussion VoiceBoards, interviews
Money minutes, gold rates
Some blast, some peace deals
What a way, to say Good morning.
Yet hope I am not fired today, 
As the morning news did say recession 
Job cuts and job losses, long leave
Companies disappearing, stocks diving
Face book blocked in offices
Looks a gloomy day.
Yet hope drives my day, a head
Beyond my reach some time
I finish my job, drive home,
Just a pleasant look on my child
A warm welcome from my wife
Makes me human from machine.
Taking deep breath of relieve 
I thank God, for all His mercy
And pray for Goodness tomorrow
And wish for all those left jobless
Lay in the arms of  beloved
I dream, with hope for better
Tomorrow. 


Details | Free verse | |

Absolutely

    Great feeling of relief
now that I have a break 
     from work
  Miraculous - I am O.K. 
Finally, it seems that trouble 
has left 
       the room
City lights sparkle in the shadows
   Gazing upon them 
                  I taste thoughts about 
all the urban dwellers 
       in this vast metorpolis 
this New York, home to 
millions
  who move in clockwork 
fashion
    to the urban beat, the urban rythms


Details | Free verse | |

Recovery takes Time

The recovery from life at seven is so trying. Having witnessed
your brother being taken to heaven. What future can a child see
through cascades of tears, what future does a parent explain to 
allay his fears. 

Their day to day life has been forever changed, as their different 
tomorrow brought loss and sever. Where do I start to tell you if I coped.
What words for the loss as my fathers health sloped.

Decisions were made from the pain we must move, to be on the peripheral, to 
rejoin life, to gain. Absorbing our loss, brought us closer than
before, but it has taken a life to go through their last door.

My father and I, responded by living. We walked in beautiful glens 
surrounded by heathers, as we as a family grew from our weathers. The walks 
on Ben Nevis in nature surround, as he taught me plenty about animals and 
plants. We would drink the clear waters as he told me it brought life. Being 
so educated at seven, filled the void. Every so often we would say " Boom 
Boom " would love being here, as we thought for a moment and then the 
eventual tears.
 
But the toll of our loss, for my father was heartbroken. His health declined 
with the loss of my brother. Six more years of sporadic times, as hospital 
became his home and child support became mine.

My recovery from life continues to this day. As I think and look back at 
all the times we spent surrounded by life, my father and I from the loss of 
a life, but I still wonder why.




.



Details | Free verse | |

Affliction

Pulsating tendrils of terror
Weave themselves through my brain,
Around my heart.  Squeezing.  
Strangling logic.
Peace shattered by panic's explosion.
My hands, slick with sweat,
Tremble violently.  My stomach
Twists itself into knots. My heart
Is a run away train.
God help me! I'm going to die!
Over and over and over like a
Recurring nightmare, I am thrown
Into the maelstrom of irrational fear.
A gun to your head kind of fear.
A nightmare I can't wake up from.
Sanity is waning --
Must.  Get.  Help!
Anxiety Panic Disorder,  they call it.
A chemical imbalance of the brain, they call it.
I call it hell.

12/14/2011
Kim Merryman
(Thank God, I did receive medical attention and have been on medication for 22 years.  I rarely have an attack now.)

Entered in PD's "May the Best Descriptive Poem Win..." contest


Details | Free verse | |

The Lazy Days Of Summer

the illuminating sounds of summer
first there is birds sweet sernarding amidst cottonwoods
and if your lucky enough even capture whispers of the wind speaking 
down in a lustrous valley of green and don't forget about  
echoes of an eagle encircling the blue yonder looking for it's mate
or you can capture  sounds of a babbling brook flowing 
down an winding outcrop stream but to me
I think my favorite sound thus far is the laughter of my child's voice
and the sizzling sounds of hot dogs and hamburgers 
being made on my grill as were watching  fireworks display 
from the back of a twin engine houseboat floating down
a rivers edge Oh the sounds of summer would be nil
if I would awake from this enchanted dream 


Details | Free verse | |

Grief

You are hell bound,
Your sounds resound,
A faint echo of my own shadowing reflection.

I grasp a mug from behind the door,
And yet its remains shatter among the tiles,
Glittering like eyes upon the floor.

I know your there to feel,
A knowing familiar smell,
And yet to physically touch you,
My tips can’t seem to dwell.

The mirrors to your past have ceased,
I cannot stare at them as well,
It is enough to see your face,
Each time you set your fearsome spell.

They said you'd left me,
Flashing lights the uniform informing,
And yet how little you have left,
Your time is still yet dawning.

So hold me tight,
Remove the remaining light that flickers in my limbs,
For if I am to be haunted,
I’ll be mourned in church by hymns.   


Details | Free verse | |

Hunger 4

       Hunger 4

So much food such little time
With so much on my mind
As I consumed the New York Times today
While others read it
My stomach grabbed me by the throat
Made me feel its pain
It screamed; “Feed me real food.” “I’ll kill you on the spot you idiot!” 
Rejecting lobsters, steaks and other pictures on the pages
The news informs me, implores me to eat on
Out of newspapers that I found
Though the images were colorful and pretty
The ink did not go down so well
Cellulose taste really grainy
I couldn’t fool or trick my self
Consuming nonfood stuff is, well, a little crazy
Eating buttons, coins and dirty bugs 
Is not exactly healthy, delicious or nutritious 
My stomach is not too fond of me these days
Perhaps it’s something that I said or ate or read 
Hunger is the only one true constant
It’s hard to keep it down


Details | Free verse | |

Mien Kampf

Starring Tonight 


What a superb line-up for you tonight ladies and gentlemen
for your entertainment and delectation 

Here is kind old Adolph with Mien Kampf
monsieur Adam Smith presents The Wealth of Nations

L Ron Hubbard Dianetics The modern science of mental health
bearded the wise Karl Marx presents Das Capital

Another beard! Yes it’s old favourite God with the Bible Old and New
Jesus what such there a promise - lets go !
and here we go! The Lovely Mohammed with the Koran
No act to follow   !

Enjoy!


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not Your Fault

The thing about life
is that
it can end in an instant

When the rope of the
harsh words
wraps tightly around your 

Neck squeezing tighter
and tighter
you just want to jump

To end it all to end all
the pain
and the hatred and words

It is not only the words
that push
you over the edge

It is too the fists and
the feet 
that slam into you

Over and over
without
a break with out letting up 

Making you break down and slide down
the wall
and cry and cry and cry

One phone call can 
save a
live, stopping that jump

Stopping the self hate
and
spreading the love

The love i have for 
you will 
never fade or die and i hope

will make you better
to sleep
and to be able to be 

Happy again to 
be happy
forever and always with me

just remember and know
that it's
NOT YOUR FAULT


Details | Free verse | |

Anemones and shells my childhood

As I recall my past, it was a sea kissed life
summers spent roaming the Rabbit Burrows
cradled by dunes, beyond Tramore strand
towels stretched out on Woodstown beach
soft powdered sand, surrounded by forest
adventures in the Saleens, daring quicksand
of swimming with dad, high jumping waves
falling, laughing in great gulps of salt water
free and fearless, in our bare bronzed years


It was a sea salted life of wave-washed castles
of tide pools, alive with translucent shrimps
carmine anemones sucked tight to the rocks
periwinkles, hermit crabs, a world of shells
baby pink crabs moving sideways over stone
textured algae, salted, crisping in the heat
our faces stinging with sand and hot sunshine
we spent hours with nets, exploring the pools


After months and years of living near the sea
the landscape became an essential part of me.
I saw fuchsia ballerinas pirouette the breeze
sea pinks, grassy rosettes swaying on cliff tops
rocket, tiny lilac petals with succulent leaves
valerian, a candy floss pink, sweetly scented
We picked them and pressed them into books


I recall my child’s life with a skipping heart
when summers seemed to shine eternal
The rock pools taught us to treasure nature
togetherness bred a strong sense of self
a respect for the sea, the taste of freedom
when I open a book, I often find a flower
and shells -  this child is forever combing


Details | Free verse | |

MEDITATION IS MUSIC

MEDITATION      IS      MUSIC


The raga’s minor keys flood my mind, unlocking a balancing shiver, pranayama and Om,

Its rhythmic tones in harmonic relation,  echoing season and day, 

Draw  out tension and sadness in tear-stained sitar notes. 

Music is me, I am music. Meditation makes music  from my body’s rhythmic processes.

So, let a  semi  quaver ease my quivering and bring harmony to my spirit  -

On moonlit evenings  an Arabic ney-flute draws out laughter and  joy, relieves stress,

While a droning tambura subtly, sympathetically  infiltrates my nervous system.

And the Pastoral  lifts my chin  to tomorrow, my body re-charged, re-tuned.

..........................................................

written  by  Sydney  Peck  for

	Dr.Ram Mehta's
Contest  -	Music and Meditation




Details | Free verse | |

when that ocean was cut into five

as the waters split into pieces
and the land formed itself
the day went longer than
than the sky, and deeper
than the sea
its form was
shaped it broke
F R E E
escaped 
as it fell lower
than the sea floor
but higher
than even the sky
the ocean was split
into five.


Details | Free verse | |

1 and 2, 2 and 1

1 pill:
to feel happy,
to feel good,
to feel strong,
to feel normal.

2 pills:
to feel happier,
to feel better,
to feel stronger,
to feel normal - er.

2 people in
1 brain.
2 people in
1 body.


Details | Free verse | |

This Secret Thing

This secret thing
grew in your breast --
a dark lump of terror
which you revealed to no one;
it ate through you,
as moths eat through
a bit of fine lace,
until it became, finally,
too terrible to hide.
Now, even the cold scalpel,
which leaves less than it takes
of what you were once,
cannot excise the horror.


Details | Free verse | |

Silver

Joaquin: paint-besotted at sixteen.

The color silver was your favorite --
it had the craved-for, biting glint
of a dagger dizzying your brain,
twisting as it mixed and chopped
your few surviving thoughts,
which floated, glittering,
in an icy silver mist.

Your classic, sculpted nose,
bearing a single dot of silver
smaller than a dime, expelled
the smell you struggled to breathe in.

And your eyes drowned in a sea of silver.


Details | Free verse | |

I'LL SMILE 4 U

Stroll through the Illest Empire
So much heat feeling like we’re living in the fire
But we’re living under fire
Tell me how many shots must it take before my loved ones are crying at my own wake
Its time for a break from sad eyes I’ve seen grown men cry
It hurts to tell a loved one good-bye
It’s the same reason why they died
Hearts just too full of pride
Mothers praying their young’n wont be a victim of a homicide
Too many drive-bys blood shed for a block you really can’t call mine
Wishing we could turn back time
High off of nickels’ and dimes
Making moves to boost your grind looking for hope
But the hustle got us in a head choke
Don’t blame me for acting crazy cause this how the streets made me and you
To watch our back and throw bows and cuss
Cause you got to be tough when times are rough
I know your asking when will enough be enough
And truth is I don’t know but this is how it goes down
But if I make it out will you smile for me now

So many families struggling with poverty
I don’t judge cause that use to be me
Watching mom come home late
Barley any food on our plate
So young and life we already hate
Praying God bring us something great
My clothes were cheap imitates and kids called you on them for being fake
Knowing mom bust her ass to provide
But all your knock offs you begin to hide
Ashamed of what you own
I know how you feel I been there too
I see mothers walking there kids to school
And the walk is far when you cant afford a car
Mom hoping one day you’ll be a star
I know about being next to poor
Your local neighborhood liquor market is your grocery store
Wishing you didn’t have to go through that living off of food stamps
Cube the neighborhood is a trap but we’ll all be free
So smile for you and me

Even 2pac said smile for me
This isn’t how its always going to be unless you let it be
In our different way we’re all a G
Cause we’re trying to make it straight legit
Whatever your hustle never quit but don’t lose yourself in it
Cause you still got a long ways to go
Still got a long time to grow
Use what you know to get by or you wont survive
Remember to always keep your dreams alive
Whatever it is just do it and never try
The limit is the sky so keep your heads held high
And when you come to a hard road just always know nothing can keep you down
You’ll be able to come back around
So give yourself a chance
And I’ll smile for you now

JUNE ‘06
B.K.M.jr


Details | Free verse | |

Boardwalk

Sun leathered skin, tanned and flayed

lies draped over the bench’s wooden slats.

A long-forgotten art brought back to

lack-lustre life

along the boardwalk.

•

This wrinkled pre-aged skin,

pricked in not so neat lines

each track a stop on the journey

that brings their nodding half-lives

to the boardwalk.

•

The coke and ice-cream hit, not for their

uncared for, condemned kids

but to feed a sugar rush,

stave off that comedown

on the boardwalk.

•

Thick syrup methodone, a sop

to replace the brown heroin

that once kissed their veins,

kicks in as they shadow walk

to the boardwalk

•

Calloused, cracked  skin spreads

factor 50, to protect the delicate

casing of their ravaged organs

as they lie, replete,

along the boardwalk.


Details | Free verse | |

Love and other drugs

The burden of beauty that keeps   
tormenting my skin,   
the love of thee that comes   
only with label,     
"beauty", if not I'm doomed.     
I can't compete with  the normal female,   
that one! yes,  the one you yearn to   
have intimacy with!   
  
It is not me the beautiful me that was; taking     
sedative to ease the pain, the misery of  the   
pills taking by day. I keep forgeting I'm not with thee.   
I keep forgeting I'm a suffering slave.   
    
And I remind myself  you are not with me.   
the pain is inevitable to stop.   
Why am I not with you? because your   
not with the less fortunate.   
"You believe you can do better".   
  
I don't want it!  No I don't;     
Your pity is more than a sword through my throat.   
Yes!  I need the drug and the love too,   
both to keep living this misery;   
I can't let it go. If I could just disappear,   
I would be there in the other side of my   
reality pushing my luck once more.


Details | Free verse | |

rain of healing time

What if there was rain?
rain that carried time.
bombarded us
with drops of eternity.
making us age.
our hair turn white.
the leaves wither.
the grass burn 
and die.
the buildings mossy 
and unattended.
the swings rusty.
the children who play 
in the rain,
lose their innocence.
the rocks weathered.
battering drops dig 
pits into the cement.
the world turns old,cold,grey.

As I watch it 
from the confines of 
my bedroom window.
guilty of escaping the rain 
that washes away 
our pain.
the rain of healing time.
maybe I should 
catch a drop and 
see my palm swiftly wrinkle.

There is no respite 
from this rain.
all that survives is 
my inner child.
within a shell of a pilgrim 
making his way towards 
the final truth.
trying to find the end 
of time.
sipping the slow poison 
that is this rain.


Details | Free verse | |

the mad

only the women are loved. 
with men, it's only the madness,
in and of its self that's used.--
and we are literary, too.
but you don't write it down
or even think it, any more.
it's just a desperate kind of feel...



 

yes, only women bleed.
and are loved, their bodies,
for it.
their emotional souls are held close.
"but he doesn't care about my mind."
well, there's more to you, that bleeds.
--this ink doesn't come from my body.
if i held you like a squid, with many arms
like an octopus?
you'd only love me for my pen.



  not this madness that is a part of me.
not this root that grows a life
beyond us.--
madness is a kind of land,
of its own religion, of its own logic.
a pain to make the doctors see;
and a Hell to make the lover feel...



  so this is the boat we share...
love is a mental illness,
where the waters that keep us afloat
are what keep us from the rest of the world.
--and in your mermaid logic,
you still pretend to drown in a place
where, together, we could be perfectly at home.



  if others can see the many arms
of my mind, because
even my floating wreckage is washed up on the shore,
won't they be able to see the mirages
of your deserted dreams
when they well up in such dancing eyes:
that only the soul of a mad lady could form
a vision in such a time?



 as ours?
is this "together" part of the shape
of another world than this one we share?
if both of us are mad,
which one of us is sane?
--is this the land of Cana?
or are you wearing the atheist's ring?


Details | Free verse | |

My other halves

Me and him and her
we are all.
He is confident and forceful,
she is doubting and horrible.
Me,
I am stuck in the middle.
on my own.
Only getting attention
when I quietly demand
and subtly moan.
Friend or foe?
They toe the party line,
they are me.
They tell me great things
that I do
and things I see.
They give me reason
and hold my esteem
fast like glue.
Outside:
I am at the bottom
not even one foot on a rung,
not even a clue.
So tell me why,
if you can.
I should not live with my two?

Star and celeb I am in their time.
Here I can do no wrong,
I have committed no crime.
They may scream and yell, 
but they do tell;
true lies.
So I'm going to stay in my place,
Alerted inside:
to your other world,
inquisition spies.
Trying fragile heart:
while I dry my eyes.





I work in mental health and was inspired to write of someone I know who has schizophrenia.


Details | Free verse | |

Heat


the heat builds inside me 
sweat popping from my forehead
stinging my eyes 

there's no relief from the surges
taking away my sanity
my inner thermostat broken

so i sit here fanning like crazy
while others stare on
with their calm and refresh demeanor

there is no relief from the heat resurgent
making the dull pain in my head ache  


Details | Free verse | |

The Love That Hurts

The greatest joy I have ever known is knowing you are calling on Monday at five thirty in
the morning before school.
"Hello, how are you?" and "I'll talk to you later."
Every word from hello to goodbye is cherished.

Your smile makes me warm inside, and how much you mean to me puts tears in my eyes.
I really think I love you. Actually, every fiber of my being is pretty sure I love you.
Warmth and acceptance and peace and deep contentment...
But there is a drawback.

I fear to loose you.
You are across the country, a thousand miles away, and I've let you down enough to
encourage you to focus on your college work, because that's important to you. and because
of that, it's important to me.

Except I can't encourage you to leave.
I can't encourage you to go.
Reader, my dear friend, as selfish as it is, I can't loose you.

I always thought that when you found the one you want to be with, the love would make
everything work.
I never expected it to hurt
Because as much as I love you, it would destroy me if you were lost. And I think about
loosing you a lot.
It's crippling, and horrid, and with something as unrealistic as daydreams, I know what it
feels like to burn. I can't imagine what it would do to me if it actually happened.

I am afraid to love you. I'm afraid to pick up the phone sometimes when you call, but not
for any amount of money in the world or any incentive would I ignore that phone.

The reason for that is that i love your laugh.
When I'm talking to you, you help clear my mind and I can think.
And the biggest reason, Reader, is because I am happy when I talk to you.

I love you. And you are precious beyond words and you are everything to me.
I have a love that hurts and it scares the crap out of me
And I wouldn't trade it for the world.


Details | Free verse | |

The Fear

                                                 The Fear.

Before the Good ol ' '48'  The Fear was always there, should you, could you call the 

Doc; must you rely on the gentry true or those who would rob you blue, or was it the 

farmer fair or foul, or the factory boss who could not give a jot whetrher you or yours 

were healthy or not: so long as could work all hours God sends, or don't over burden 

the rich who would starve if they paid taxes fair while you can afford dirt wages cus 

cussed you deserve no better because you aren't as good as your betters. 

In Good ol' '48' Clem the PM and Nye who ministered to your health created what has 

half-right called the UK's only relgion,and half -wrong our Christian culture not 

completely gone; the churches led by the C of E came to the colours to reject to the 

poverty and the pain of before the Second World War, the Brits won the People's War, 

a new war began! Who would win over the Docs. who didn't want to play ball at all?

Would be the King's Doc. medic who hated the 'thing' - the NHS or great Churchill's Doc 

who had the brains, the decency that that Welsh granite Nye Bevan would brook no 

opposition to the People's principle, ALL will pay and ALL will not rue the day so the 

NHS was not stillborn. Today, we have to end the complacency of some politocos, to 

end the recklessness of others; remembering that it is for ALL so that those 

abroad - some at home -who not wish well that British benefit - our NHS - do not 

have the wit to understand it or the malevolence to destroy it -we must defend it!

                                                 Prevent the Fear returning!
     







Details | Free verse | |

Rush Hour

I rush through each day as if I have endless days ahead of me
When in reality each day is counting down to my demise
I awake each morning running my day through my mind
Planning on how to get there in the shortest amount of time

I rush through traffic, angry that it is moving so slowly
I run through the halls, arriving at my office out of breath
Logging in as I throw my purse in a drawer, the clerk reminds me of a meeting
There's fifty emails to answer and the blasted light on my phone is blinking

Burning my tongue on a cup of coffee, I rush down the stairs clutching my PDA
Deleting messages on my way to another conference I'm not ready for
To be told to move their projects to the top of my priorities
I return to my desk and scratch another due date to my to do list

Lunch comes and goes as I swallow yet another yogart and banana
I should have stock in these companies; it's my daily substance
Budget is due and the contracts are behind; by the way where is my handouts?
I still haven't answered that stupid light on my phone

The day is finished and I finally get around to the messages
One is canceling tomorrows meeting but there are two to replace it.
The last call is my doctors office telling me the biopsy is back
Could I make an appointment to see the doctor right away; it's abnormal.

Cars honk as they pass me in their hurry to no where
I don't see them through the veil of tears streaming off my cheek
Did I just pass my exit?  I don't care
I'm no longer in a hurry; the sun has just set on my day.


Details | Free verse | |

Dis-ease

She passes through the world
with an air of contempt about her

an anger, a raw cancer
consuming all she says and does

She cannot feel the love
around her, or inside of her

In a vast womb of want
the anger grows steadily
like a tumor


Details | Free verse | |

Insomnia, The cause of my pain

First, 
I thought it was nothing.
"Just not tired" I'd tell myself.
But truth be told, 
I'm tired all the time.
I just cannot sleep. 
I try and try.
Still can't sleep.
"Take the pill" i tell myself.
Still i  can't sleep.
So sleep deprived,
that i become sick, not just mentally but physically.
Just wish i could sleep.
and get over this.
:[


Details | Free verse | |

Stand Up And Fight {Poetry In Motion}

a womans humanity remains strong
regardless of the victimization
simply stand strong to opposition





Tribute To Abused Woman
Never Give Up The Fight


Details | Free verse | |

Ode to a San Francisco Head

It’s that beat
Bang!
arms around the porcelain
alter
shared by music gods
a plenty

The Smash!
drowns the sweetness
as the 
Boom!
carries away the wrong

with the Shrill!
stabilizing the united
chaos 
tears make their way  
to reddened arms and
Sizzle!
towards the heavens

now swaying with the
Ba Ba Ba!
images appear between
tears
where truth and purity
are found

collapsing to rest
with a sweaty
Slide!
upturned by reality
breathing hard is the 
Beat Beat Beat!
of paralysis

then dipped into the
icy mercy of a
Shout!
and then a muffled
trumpets prayer

only to awaken to
a deafening
Slam!
and an earth moving
Shake!
only then experience
takes hold

Sa Sa Wop! 


Details | Free verse | |

WRITING WHEN YOUR BREATH STINKS

No perfect verse
can be written before sleep;
it's better to procrastinate
than to write when your breath stinks!
No, I am not referring 
to unbrushed teeth
and unrinsed mouth,
but lots of gulping drinks!   
Even your pen swerves as a wheel of a car;
doesn't influence effects your ability
to put thoughts together!



Food for thought
is not wine, beer or champagne; 
they will not stimulate your intellect
when you are unable to think!
Rather they will decrease brain performance,
blocking your thinking process...
like an invalid password not giving you access!
Ever sent one to an editor...
and it was rejected for grammar,
wrong form and misspelling?
He must have smelled alcohol from far!



There was a poet writing
lengthy verses lacking imagination,
they couldn't hold the reader's attention:
when they could have been brief
and to the point without sacrificing artistry! 
He always had a bottle of rum
or vodka next to him to keep him company!
Wouldn't you say that...
he was as drunk as his pen?



Writing when your breath stinks,
slows you down and makes you unresponsive
to your surroundings...
failing to notice important things!
There are lots of foolish mouths 
spitting out words
with the allude they will be
performed on stage!
Wouldn't the audience be upset,
or show intense rage?




Details | Free verse | |

Trip to the Dentist

White coat, blue mask, optical
eye staring intently at me as I sat,
motionless.
Sterilized instruments of torture gleamed
at me in the pristine tray.
Numbed, knowing I was losing
a little more of myself,
I was helpless as this seemingly
normal human
was transformed into this sick, twisted,
sadistic torturer. Taking pleasure in the
misery of others. Push, twist, pinch, wedge,
pull … oops, it broke! Let me know if
you feel something sharp.
Pick, poke, prod, there. I think I got it all.
You may be sore for a couple
of days. Take aspirin or ibuprophen if
it gets bad (aspirin? Is he kidding?).
Two days later and I want my daughter
to smack my face with a baseball
bat.
I have found a new enemy … and his name is
Dentist!


In real life, I love my dentist. Just some sarcastic fun.
Please don't replace my Novocaine with water!! 
Tony


Details | Free verse | |

Chapter 12 Annihilation

The Tragedy of Humanity is the Monoku of us failing to believe you
Is This Greed be ye Acrostic for not knowing the Gnostics 
Molding Most be the boast in Senryu saying you can’t tell me what to do
Excommunicating Faith is a Tanka for those who sank 
Insanities Calamities in this Enclosed Ryhme regarding to our binds
Sinful Are These Ways considers what we forgot in this Rubaiyat
No Righteousness In a Senryu for those who forgotten about you
Oligarchies Creating Hate in each and every state be in Enclosed Ryhme 
Worshiping Vanities is a Lanterne telling you to burn
Ruthless Deceptions be a Fibonacci trying to drown the mariachi
Evil Enemy Tricks informs of a constructive fraud in Ballade
Trouble Moving is trouble grooving to chime in this Enclosed Ryhme
Roadside Utilities you see they are a bank of put in Tanka
Indestructible Ye told Ottava rima, praying you have the mind of
But Backsliding means deciding what zone told in Canzone
Unruly Child is for the minds of you told in Haiku
Truth Be Insight be an Ottava rima about the main man Prima
Inclined Minds is another Ottava rima about the change of time for Ye
Opportunities There Be in this Senryu don’t you see
No Matter is about the chatter in an Enclosed Rhyme for you to find
Death Be A Lady This Night ask which way is right Ottava rima
Introduction Which Leads To Reduction a Nonet seduction
Sexual Acts Meant To Distract be the private zone Canzone
Turmoil That We Struggle With is a chime in Enclosed Rhyme
Redefining Ones Plight be Ottava rima telling you to fight
Instilled In Ye Is Light another Nonet so that you don’t forget
Believing Wrong or Right asks this Enclosed Rhyme the real war crime
Undertaken Be Ye is a new flight zone told in Canzone
Transcendent In Flight is the alteration told in Alliteration
Inner Subconscious Intelligence universal relevance in Name
Outside This Reality which is for you to do discern told in Lanterne
New To Old Experience is an Enclosed Rhyme we all mime
Nay Sayers Deny Greatest Fear in Acrostic about ye the agrestic
Over Energy Transfer is Canzone about the unknown
What Will You Do is just asking you in Haiku?


Details | Free verse | |

Slavicode

my words are not real
my verb task nothingness
my sentences are coded
because in vacuo
touched by the evil
I am transparent object
I am the putrefactive future


Details | Free verse | |

how my illness affects my relationships

Ok im in love
been with a man for a year
who has swept me off my feet
I have been diagnosed
witha schitso effective mood disorder
i also am a recovering drug addict

Paranoia?
fear of your lover being your hitman
and then asking him how much the government is paying him
to make love to you
and not cringe
as you look for how the pieces fit
and his reasons of being in your life for the worst possible case sceraio
whem maybe just maybe
he is in love with you
for being kind hearted and generous
and sensitive
and creative

always wondering if hes cheating
always missing him
always keeping these things in the forefront of your mind
where were you?
with who?
why did that take soo long?
I know you say you love me.......
but
does anyone truly trust anyone that much to believe in love?

A guilty conscience from a drug addiction
due to meeting people who want to hook up
to use them for drugs
and then leave
this is called being a player
so basicaly if he was a cheater i would have drove him to it

In the end the result is
i want him to be happy
and the question is
how did i get soo screwed up
mental illness
paranoia
wondering why everyone is soo happy while your confused
putting pieces together to a mystery that may or may not be there
wondering even if you were a good detective and you did solve the crime
would you do anything anyway?
or just stay where you felt safe in the comfort of the nightmare of all the lies
that you proved to yourself were right

fight or flight?


In the end i always choose love
now love is a weapon
feeling seduced
and not soo well
question upon question of whats the worst that could happen as everything 
seems to blow up in your face


hopwever life continually proving you wrong
and people showing you again and again
they are your safe place and rock
even if you question it from time to time
has been reality babysitting me
and a saving grace
as my illness keeps me on my toes
and challenges me and my lover from day to day
and i wonder
how he can see through all my walls to the beauty i know i hold
and tell me about it
and make me feel so great


Details | Free verse | |

the written assurance of life

Murmurs of doubt peel off the page
Lost lesions flee from snakeskin
An endless stymied spiral recedes
As coarse winds blow apart overgrown weeds

The scattered feelings of yesterday
Are embalmed from a smooth drifting marvel
Renewed to pursue this grand calling


Details | Free verse | |

Dream Complexity

I dream of commanding my day with excellence,
To reach goals that I haven't reached before,
To marry again perhaps with excellence ,
Live in the beautiful house of my dreams,
Where all my children of every age are always welcome,
Fashions that are detailed and enhanced,
A place where the great artists and musicians bless,
Dance enhancing our everyday lives,
Theatre a guest worth welcoming,
Friends to visit for a cup of tea and lunch,
A garden where favorite foods are grown,
A piano where all my favorite songs are played,
Simply a dreamy existence with God.


Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz



Details | Free verse | |

Shaving

Most men shave every day.  It is
Our ritual of hygiene and vanity.
A clean, freshly shaven face will
get results, restore our sanity.

The act of shaving makes us think,
about our imperfections, the mirror
is unfair but also indispensable, our
nervous hands grow steady there.

Lately I have begun to see another
side of me.  As I spread the creamy foam,
and slowly pull the razor through, I
wonder what she might think of me.

This feeling gets me through the day
I touch my face tenderly, just to see
how it might feel to be touched, how
it might feel to be touched by her someday.


Details | Free verse | |

Twinkling Souls

Sitting alone in a hotel room
Looking out over flat roofed buildings
At twinkling lights across the Island.
How many lights?
How many people?
Sitting alone in their rooms?
Looking out.
Alone.
Searching.
Despairing of finding ourselves.
Fearful of discovery
That I am Me.
Who is dying?
Slowly but slowly we all surely will.
Choice is everything.


Details | Free verse | |

Mixed thoughts of 2012

The year 2012
Brought a lot, good and sad
My Tad died in January
Openheart surgery I had to have

But thats all  far behind me
Though memories never fade
I think about the better times
I know thats what he'd say

Had many happy times
On long weekend away
Have some fabulous friends
Whose help I cant repay

Then of course theres Tilly
A rescue Boxer who is old
Was given away like garbage
Her real story never told

But if I had to write about just one thing
It would have to be as  read
Me opening my eyes after surgery
Coming back from the dead.

Friendly faces looking down at me
Saying Seren open your eyes dear
Couldn't do so for a moment
Because tears were very near

Tears of joy and hope
That things will soon be okay
That life will get started again
Bright sunshine all the way.

I know I have a guardian angel
Making sure that i survive
From all that s thrown at me
Keeping me alive.















Details | Free verse | |

Road to Refreshment

 (for all asthmatic patients)
The heart is the engine
                  Of the body
The flesh is the bonnet
                 Over the engine
The blood is the oil
                 That is lifesaving
Your hormones are the bus stops
                  Over that bumpy road
                     That is: life.

Your heart is the centre of your body
Your nose gave you over
And handed you to the grip of dust and soot
Your lungs are the straws to refreshment:
                     Life without pain.
Life without pain awaits you
It is on the next bus stop for you to encounter
Take heart...
I feel your pain


Details | Free verse | |

Huntington's

Quietly the disease crept into the family. Away from home for the first time and far from her mother’s cautioning words, she fell in love with and married her college sweetheart. He had told her of the mysterious disease from which his mother had died when he and his twin brother were very young. Alarmed, the bride’s mother researched the disease once know as Huntington’s Chorea, now simply as Huntington’s. What she read terrified her. Their little girl weighed a mere three pounds at birth and after reaching five pounds went home to their loving and tender care. She was a beautiful and strong child until after her sixth birthday when she started exhibiting disturbing symptoms. The doctors denied their fears. This inherited disease does not show its dreaded presence until adulthood. She was an exception. By this time, her father’s sister had been diagnosed with the disease. He also had a twin brother and along with a sister who died at birth, that made four children born to this unlucky carrier. The chances are fifty/fifty that a child of a parent with the disease will inherit it. In this case eventually, every sibling succumbed to the horror. The only good thing about this terrible affliction is that if a child of a Huntington patient escapes, all of his descendants are safe. It does not skip generations and it cannot be passed on by anyone but a parent. This child’s disease progressed rapidly. She went from a bright, articulate, happy youngster to a voiceless, chair-bound invalid in a few short years. At eleven and some months she died in her sleep. Her lungs had simply forgotten to function and she stopped breathing. ------December 10, 2011 Won No. 4 Huntington's is one of those fairly rare genetic diseases that is not well funded and researched as are the the more prevalent diseases. It should be. This is one of the most terrible afflictions known to man and its victims are helpless. There was one other granchild in the family. He too died of Huntington's in early adulthood. It had rampaged through the family and had now destroyed itself. Both the family and the disease had come to an end.


Details | Free verse | |

The Inner Struggle

Some our very eager perplexed swept within

Underneathe the belly of the beast
A needed flower to grow amidst the rise of yeast
Within sullen fragmented dreams & truth
One may even negate that inner truth for a lie?

That inner struggle within/

To remain attached to the vine sublime

We are more then qualified for its great design
To calm the nerves from within
We look to man yet find no hold
We look toward self thus grafted in again onto the rights are sold

We then read books based on logic & get trapped within
~

For some, 
It's inner struggle is what we all must seek to face
Within loose debris in decayed formation
Yet some its inner struggle is a way of escape?

Proned toward evident inhillation embraced with its surfaced Peyton Place;

The inner struggle from within
Fought back the heavy tears with a smile
Still to know all the great while
A hand to hold a loving kiss embraced

For this is the thought provoking struggle we enivatably all must face?

The inner struggle.


Details | Free verse | |

Latenight No1

I can eat your sick
because I'm immune to all the days
that gather at your feet and beg for you to
cease this living.
To wring necks dry of cost,
and to tell me not to?
In the end,
you can consider me nature's go-to gal;
I carry your countdown clock.


Details | Free verse | |

Cancer

All day he sits in a chair, watching
winter spread like white linen,
clutching the body, fingers,
frigid in the hospital, 
frail as chalk, or
white lies-

"You'll survive".


Details | Free verse | |

It was a Good Last Day of Winter

I drew wings all over me
and for a brief period of time,
I felt that I could fly.
However I cannot stress the brevity of this period;
[it was only about 7 seconds],
after which I hit the ground and thought,
"How silly of me to jump,
for I am no bird!"
This is when the birds took notice
and pecked me to pieces.
It was a pretty good last day.


Details | Free verse | |

TIME TO MOVE

Written 20 may 2013



My faith is in you Lord
 trapped to this bed, I'm bored

How much longer shall I be still
 for I know this is by your will
 
I'm alone and at your mercy
 given up friends and family
 
My faith is struggling oh Lord
 I pray that you hear my call

I've been still, by not a choice of mine
 learning lessons through your will and time 

Patience is growing to an all time low
 lets get this operation done, lets go

I've learn't who I am and I do pray 
 so lets get moving, before I fade away....

Give me strength to handle the operation that awaits
 so that I may again see the sunlight on my face



Details | Free verse | |

A Step Ahead of Death

Life like a movie,
Look at me,
Can’t you see?
Crazed mind,
Left behind,
Every memory,
You’re ahead of me,
Feeling ill,
A passing thrill,
Grips me up,
I’ll erupt,
This feeling in my head,
My eyes see red,
Can’t you comprehend?
My quickly nearing end,
Which direction?
No affection,
Head takes control,
Fell in the hole,
Deep is the dark,
Feeling stark,
I’ll never make the mark,
I’ve always wanted to,
Nothing new,
Thoughts creep,
Every one deep,
Distortion,
Eruption,
Rise up and flee,
You won’t turn into me,
Afflicted,
Addicted,
To my words,
I know you heard,
Understand,
Where I am,
Life is bleak,
For a freak,
There’s nothing left,
I’ll try my best,
Not to burst,
Turn for the worst,
Better myself,
Personal health,
Will to win,
Time to begin,
Moving forward,
Reach toward,
The right light,
So ---- bright,
I just might,
Find myself to be,
Beyond free,
Life with wings,
What goodness brings,
Do you see me now?
One big wow,
Feel the power of positive,
Let go of derogative,
Thoughts, Feelings, Wishes,
Beating hearts get kisses,
Don’t ever leave,
Always believe,
Every day,
A step ahead of death.


Details | Free verse | |

Poem Medecine

Sometimes I wonder if I use poetry as a crutch
To my emotions broken limbs
As if poetry is an outpatient outlet for my informative formalities
Passive aggressive tendencies
Rhyme disease
My apologies, I seem to forget the apostrophes
Like symbolic catastrophe
Heartache rhinoplasty
Augmentation of my weaknesses
I contain in my vial the audacity
Squirting literary illness on healthy bodies and souls
Because we're all dying,
And just trying to stay beautiful

-Jess


Details | Free verse | |

Heroes

   I walk down the white,
antiseptically clean halls.
Tears flow unrestrained,
freely down my face.
I look to my left ,
and back to my right .
What greets my watery vision,
tears at my heartstrings.
Genuine smiles from the faces,
and bright eyes of hope and wonder.
Mere young ones,
who should be playing in a  meadow,
with grass and trees.
Alas ,their meadow is,
clean walls , and white tile.
Their wildflowers,
the fragrance of alcohol.
...........Yet they smile,
and dream,and Love.
They never hit a thousand home runs,
or threw,
 the game winning touchdown.
Never  won a war,
oh but they do fight,
for their lives.
And still they smile,
............my Heroes. 


Details | Free verse | |

Chernobyl Gases

Hearts irradiated gasp
Neutrons scatter at the clasp
Architecture crumbles heaven
Kremlin scrambles level seven
Xeric tissue lacks retention
RNs wilting for Roentgen


Details | Free verse | |

Me


The form you see
the eyes, the nose, the breast, the teeth
may not be what you like
eyes too dark, nose too big, breast not perky, teeth not white
the form you see is it me
is there not more to me
than just the form you see
maybe that is all of me
just the form that you see
why try to change keep changing
the form that you see
bigger breast, whiter teeth, slender figure
if there was more to me
than why oh why try to change the form you see?


Details | Free verse | |

Diamonds, Diamonds

Leave me in the Garden of Eden,
To witness life form and rivers begin 
to roll,
Naked but clothed in innocence,
Immortality has been placed within 
my grasp,
Animals, colossal beasts fall under 
my authority,
Every fruit and flower is offered to 
sustain me, save one,
Why do I want for what is 
forbidden, what will do me harm?
Every inch of this utopia is
entrusted to my care,
I will not fall into folly,
She is so radiant, shimmering 
diamonds are like as dust,
Born of my flesh and bone, the 
apple of my eye,
Her voice is my only weakness, the 
only chink in my armor,
As of now I know nothing of death 
but I would sacrifice myself for her,
The serpent struck while she 
wandered alone,
He enticed her to trade paradise for 
a bite,
Her mind freed, she introduces me 
to sin,
I must endure the face of beautiful 
temptation,
I feel the shift as the fruit touches 
my lips,
As as we hear God traversing the 
garden, we hide,
Clothed in fig leaves we face the 
Maker,
With trembling knees we accept the 
consequences,
With backs turned, cast out and 
disgraced,
The sword of the captain of angels 
bars the gate,
Sentenced to a life of hardship and 
anguish,
We will forever lament choosing 
death over life


Details | Free verse | |

Pothead

Pothead
Stoned like a rock
Blazed like a fire
Baked like a cookie
Faded like a photo
Buzzed like a bee
Toasted like bread
Wasted like an alcoholic
Hammered like a nail
Oh I could go on
One of the saddest things in life
People throwing themselves Away
Just to get high like a private jet
Who knows
Maybe one day, smart people
Like me
Will be as rare as Manatees


Details | Free verse | |

SCORCHED VALENTINE

Scorched Valentine

Lo, behold those cheeks
Beside thee, dear, roses pale
Red, red, oh so red!
Found you, love, when day was done
Gone to sleep ‘neath mountain sun


Dave Austin


Details | Free verse | |

Eden Return

Hysterical laughter in eternity
still crying out at the hypocrisy
of life lived under the thumbs
of the oppressing ones.
Freedom they said they would give us
If we asked the king to forgive us.
and if we agree to pay tribute
they would stop the rape and loot
we didn't even know
which ones were in control
at any point in time
the fully sublime
shiftings of power
by the day and the hour
locked in the ivory tower
and away from the peasant earth digger
they had much bigger
things to accomplish, than just a pleasant life.
And all the strife they laid upon us all
was part of the fall
from dignity.
It's a pity.
Then came the mines and the factories
warriors needed to keep the keys
to the city gates in the right hands
none of us really understands
the workings of the minds that need
so badly to succeed
that life has no meaning or worth.
Even less for planet earth.
And she's dying
and no one is trying
to revive her.
Now they want to survive her
and credit card shackles still hold the debtors prison
third world vision
is incomplete
no one can compete
in world markets controlled by the elite
we are the billion feet
of the crawling beast.
and at least
we could know why we chose it.
Just suppose it
could change.
Seems strange.
But if the feet stop running the treadmill of fear
and we all held dear
what was important, sacred, the sane
would we stop acid rain?
What if our lawns became gardens all
could we reverse Edens fall?
What if our children could eat and play
from natures sweet bounty every day?
Would cancer disappear if we stopped the spray?
and left no more poison where children play?
What if we made our own industries
in each of our communities?
What if we made windmills and power the sun
we may have just begun
a revolution
that holds a solution
for our planets peace.
I release my rage at the beastly machine
that holds destruction, Pull myself from in between
the cogs of the wheel of the corporate dream
and paint a new picture in the sky.
Of streets and towns and city planning true
ways and solutions that work for me and you
and the earth's evolution could take another turn
where we do not burn
in the hell of nuclear wastelands
It will take many hands
to undo the self fulfilling prophesies of armageddon
Get on board, this train is moving. get on
with it. We all fit in the grand plan,
the saving grace of man.


Details | Free verse | |

THE SIBYL - ASTARTE'S BIRTH

Aphrodite-wed on summer's noon
     I lay me    long reflecting
And glad my eye    the sky
     as hillcrest partner shares this view -
Fond Cytherea seems at nature with a point
     in thought-fixed time
All else    save lady    with her doting nymphs
     is show'ring green about
And I    intruder at her foaming birth
     rebuke the modern scandal
Nothing lurid    naught impure
     my naked lady stands at bath
While soon doves    blithely perched
     (wet wings do mark a chilling breeze)
Most amorous white birds praise
     my passion's woozy lightness 'neath the trees


Details | Free verse | |

Bittersweet Serenity

Having flown with you.
  Having watched you wither.
    Beauty remains,
      But the most beautiful has blown away.
    Memories remain.
      Mementoes remain.
        Hate the remains of my life without you.
Mistakenly 
  You have taken me
    To the open, angry earth.
  You have left me to claw my casket.
    Scraping,
      Scratching,
        Spastically striving...
          To escape,
            To survive.
              I’m alive!
Withered,
  Wired,
    Watch the whimsical poet.
Flying,
  Frying,
    The bastard with the bowl.
I had five days to choose the chosen.
  Five days to direct the destiny of the predestined.
    Five days done gone by...
Loved no one.
  Felt so low.
    Felt I was going nowhere...
      There was nowhere to go.
    Felt I knew no friends...
       There were no friends to know.
Solitary.
  I have succumbed to seclusion.
Beat down.
  Feeling the dry ground.
    Fearing the melodic sound:
      My desperate breathing.
        My own heart beating.
But my fears could not imagine the depth of lonliness.


Details | Free verse | |

Rise and Fall

up from the walls of jail
a prisoner in my own hell
I Rose

failing health for so many years
imprisoned by my doubts and fears
I Rose

shackled by deep depression
I knew I must keep pressing
I Rose

back to health and my life
rid myself of all the strife
I Rise

now for you I do my very best
I guess I just wasn't up for the test
I Fall

all I do for you is not enough
why do you have to be so tough
I Fall

critisizing all I do
is nothing good enough for you
I Fall

rising up from the ashes
I will gracefully take your lashes
on the mend

I WILL RISE AGAIN


Details | Free verse | |

Pain

Pain, a skylight shining in strife,

glowing embers of coal,

burning in your soul,

fire red hot, smoke is rising,

stable breathing a foe,

suffocation in harmonious retreat?


Pain, the highlight of your life,

like rapids n' rocks in the river,

that impede your flow,

cuts like a knife, pierced,

blood red from blue, a status quo,

my tourniquet invisible, hampered, n' bleak.


Pain, the twilight in your life,

traverse that mountain,

climb to the summit peak,

so the suffering is beneath you,

cause many times its debilitating,

suffocating, and makes you weak.


Details | Free verse | |

Third Eye of Humanity

Humanity has a gift that has been long forgotten.
Some call it a feeling, some call it just intuition.
We all have some sort of reaction to different things.
Dreams, provide information if you understand.
We all have senses that we rely on, in many ways.
Third eye, known as part of the chakra,
Vortices from the chakra, shows in energy,
Ancient beliefs, used for visual transportation,
Beyond what we know as time-space continuum,
Past acknowledgements were held in superstition,
We can and will harness this anomaly in the future.
For I myself have slight abilities of seeing future events.


Written for

Sponsor ^Rick Parise 
Contest Name Spirit Eye NEW CONTEST 


Details | Free verse | |

Leaving

I hate it
Knowing you might not stay
It's eating your 
Life away
Sucking you up
Like a black whole
Taking in everyone you know.
I hate it
Living on
Wondering,
If you'll be gone
God has made his choice,
We cannot share,
what this cancer is,
because I do not know
If you can stay


Details | Free verse | |

' The Brevity of Breath ... '

We Take For Granted:

       Lungs Filling, In – Out …
       How Respiratory Come About
       But Resuscitation To Our Mouth
       Keeps Soul, from Going South …

But Just Imagine:

       Stitch-in-Side, Pleurisy
       Emphysema or Drowning At-Sea !
       Pneumonia, Bronchitis or Oxygen-Gone
       And Asthma, are Just a few Suffocating Wrongs

       Of Breathing Passages, Swollen … Blocked
       Adenoids and Snoring, Wake-Up… Pop-Pop!
       Try Pillow-Smothering, or Panic-Attacks
       Choking, Gasp? … Need Gas-Mask?

       Ahh … Short and Sweet and Necessary
       Hold and Count to 30 … In A Hurry?
       If It Stops … Then Start To Worry
       … All This, is Very Airy-Scary …

               … The Brevity of Breath …

       Had Enough?
       (Loud) Puff – Puff
       I Know, It’s Never Enough Fellow
       Whether Gulping-Deep, Nor Panting-Shallow

       Some Have Quick – Spurts
       ‘Til Side Hurts
       Hacking Cough … Then The Wheezing
       Can’t Catch A Breath … That’s You Leaving

       … Next Stop Death … or Joint-Machine-Breathing
       … Are You Receiving ? …

                … The Brevity of Breath …

“ … Breathed Into His Nostrils, The Breath of Life … “          (Gen. 2: 7)
       Morning Breath ? … Relax Honey … It’s Just Your Wife …

                … Checking On The Brevity of Breath …


Details | Free verse | |

Head Down

Starving children
In 3rd world
Countries. Hospitalized patents
Waiting patiently while you
Have your head down
In the sand.

A temper like an
Inferno. Words like a 
Snake's bite, Damage like
A cliff dive. But you
Have your head down,
Down in the sand

Love of the wrong
Kind. Addiction to a force that no one 
Understands. but you
Persist to have your
Head in the sand

Corruption comes with
Power; or power
With the ladder. Country's
Have all done wrong, so why just blame one?

But you don't mind that because your heads in the sand.
With the seriousness
Of an illness,
Curse of addiction, grip of hunger or
The sting of venom. Man will always
Lift their head from the sand.


Details | Free verse | |

Royal Thesaurus

The royal thesaurus,
Learned and scholarily.

Blessed experientially,
My favorite teachers of the realm.

Fashionable and beautiful,
Days of royal representations.

They keep our universe safe,
Godly and distinguished.

Companions of the highest order,
Their royal visits appreciated and celebrated by humanity.

Model kingdoms of culture and virtue,
To be so blessed and divine.

This is a rhyme that humanity treasures,
Repects and reveres, thankfulness to God.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

LIPOMA

        LIPOMA
There did they go into the cyberspace
where none but the great of heart
have ever gone before
and they did find great pleasure unto the night
for it was a time of love and understanding
and she did say it is good.
And when they did awake unto the dawn
then he did see a mass onto his shoulder
that had not ever been there before
and he was sore afraid.
Then he did say unto his mate, whose name is Mae,
what is it that has aflicted me in the night
and bonded itself onto the very body of me?
And she did reply unto her husband,
I know not.
And so they did consider the mass
and it was firm and round as a gooses egg,
yet it was of the mass that was thrice the size.
So she did lay her hands onto the mass
and did say,
is it now with pain, for I have given it a great charge?
But he did reply, nae, I feel it not.
And so they did go with the coming day,
even as the sun was high, unto his physician,
who counseled with some of his own, as to the matter.
And they did touch, and poke, and wonder
at the mass, and then they did say
it is a lipoma, and it is nothing more.
But one of physicians did ask
of what great need do you have of this arm,
and the man did reply, it is not the one
with which I write my name.
And the husband, whose name is Fred, did inquire
as to how this mass ever came to be
and so has attached itself onto me?
And there it sits, as if bad things to come.
Then his physicians did reply and say
nae, it is naught to worry about
but we can remove it if you have the desire.
And the wife did say unto the physicians,
who were with great skill in the matter,
this he does have,
so the husband did say, it is so my desire,
I have great needs that it be gone.
But the physicians did reply
it shall be taken away in twelve days,
for that is the only time
that is not already spoken for.
And so they did agree.
Now when the night came and he did lay again with his wife,
there came a great trembling from deep within
his body, and he did shake to his very toes.
And she did say, husband, why is it that you shake?
And what is it that maketh your body wet all over,
as if a rain has fallen on the very place you lay?
And he did reply, I know not.
But he was with great fear and did wonder
as to what the mass could be.
And his wife did then say,
it is a lipoma, and it is nothing more.
But he did think on the matter and then did say,
this must surely be as unto a sign from the maker
that my time is at hand.
Surely my life has been filled with goodness
but has brought me unto this very day.
And she did say,
it is a lipoma, and it is nothing more.
And as the day grew near,
but was even the second day unto the removal,
the husband did worry and say some more,
my life is at an end
for the very inside of me does now quake
and my hands tremble at the sight of the mass.
Yea, mine eyes cannot bear to gaze upon it
and it has become an abomination unto my sight.
But his wife did say,
it is a lipoma, and it is nothing more.
Then there came onto the tube, as if an omen
and a sign unto its own,
that a man had a mass and surely it had taken him away,
as if a robber had come in the night.
And he did grieve, for the day was almost at hand,
but did go unto his physicians and did say,
see how my body is wet and trembles at its' sight?
How is it that this thing has come unto me?
And what are the tingles unto my skin
is it what cometh from a lipoma?
But the physicians did shake their heads
and then they did say
you have the stress.
And so he did wonder at what they did tell him,
and when he looked, the mass was still there.
But the physicians did say,
it is a lipoma, and it is nothing more.
And one of the physicians said
if it is not a lipoma, the betting is off.
And then the man did return to his home
but trembled in the night.
Now when the morning did come
and the woman reached for her husband,
she found his space to be empty
and wet where he had layed.
and she did say, husband,
where is it you have gone?
But she heard not a reply.
And so she did go into the bottom of the house
where she did see him hanging from a beam
and then she did cry.
And so the constable did come, along with the scribes,
but the wife was with great grief
and did say o! that my life has such dismay
because of the lump that has taken him away.
What manner of thing has fallen to me?
And the scribe, who was to tell of the matter,
asked of her, what is it that has made you grieve?
And then the constable did say
is it the mass, that has made your husband
to end his life?
And she did say, it was a lipoma,
and it was nothing more.
....© ron wilson aka vee bdosa the doylestown poet


Details | Free verse | |

Hospital


Mid-July 
Hospital

Sun pungent, not cold; 
But the snow dwells at my feet, 
The heavy air squats above my lungs. 
 
Took awhile to shake off the ants,
The ground attentive
The time a prisoner needs to hibernate,
Fear swallowing the pulse
In my chest whole –

Insensible I crossed many entrances,
I walked through rooms filled with
Scents of chloroform-
Old tools, fetid sheets, rusty cabinets,
I am here among the tormented bodies.

Silence needles and twinges
Me unceasingly
Now my heart is a needle.

The orange pumpkins have no eyes
Pointed at balconies that 
Drink rusty tears from the sky.
O how the balconies melt like echoes!
O how the sun illuminates the present!
O how to die or to smile!

I opened a slit in my Spirit,
There I put myself  
Then disappeared 

Written by © Fatima Nusairat


Details | Free verse | |

Desperation takes control

She's locked in silence and fear, behind that cold glass wall. She tries with all her might to not give into her darkest temptations. And grab that stealy cold blade, and watch as her blood comes pouring out. She lays in desperation waiting... For nothing. For everything. Her desperation takes over, begins to control her. She cries out in anguish. Let's it all flow out. Tears, Blood, Love, Family, Her Life. It all comes out in one swift motion of her best friend. Her razor blade. She closes her eyes and clenches her teath. Wishes it would all go away, but she knows there's not such thing. Grew up wanting to die, it was so hard. Wishing she could be normal like everyone else. All she wanted is not to be locked in a box full of emotions. Blood flows down her arm and all she hears is her silent sobs. Watches her life pass infront of her. She fades in and out. Laying in her pool of desperate, worthless blood. One more breath, those last words. I love you mom and dad.


Details | Free verse | |

ADDICT

Petty and ephemeral is the addict
lost in inner space and
devoid of rationality.
A cognitive aberration with listless core;
A captive to lifeless substance.

A begging petitioner of undeserved pity;
wholly blameful for a schism with
all who matter.
A renegade from normality; woefully
ignominious - a trite revulsion.

A perpetual thief to even kin is this
slug of slight substance.
A ruinous parasite to all, including self.
Such is the essence, the very soul of the addict
unless he rejuvenate and change.


Details | Free verse | |

A and E

I went
to a & e
I sat in
the waiting
room with a
man alive by
virtue of a
heartbeat and
a boy who
had swallowed a
dictionary.

Mozart tended
to our head
wounds as a
whiskey priest
stood in the
corner under a
burning redlit
cross that
terrified his 
dandruff.

I asked the
boy his name
and he told
me the
definition of
bourgeoisie and 
disappeared into
theatre as
the heartbeat guy
grinned at me
through a 
mouth like
watermelon.

and after some
time waiting
I realised that
nothing was
wrong with me


Details | Free verse | |

Last and passed

A year is closed
 It is called, last
 Yet it didn't last
 A reminder to those
 Who traversed
 under rough weather,
 that those do pass.

May you know how much God loves you!

My sincere wishes to all for a very happy, healthy and extraordinary New Year 2012 to you and yours! God bless!

CarolineCecile - 01/01/2012!


Details | Free verse | |

5 Liters

Water, in a protein sense,
salt and other substances,
make up plasma, which, in kind,
account for half of blood's design.

A mammal's blood is red and bright,
-from oxygen, when mixed inside.
Because of an iron-filled kind of protein,
Hemoglobin, it's red and glowing.

Red and white cells fill the half,
oxygen rides in small red rafts.
Compared to white, the reds are many,
born from marrow, good and plenty.

Blood supplies glucose and acids,
while carbon dioxide wastes are banished.
Coagulation is the body's repair,
as hormones message when damage is there.

It regulates the body heat,
hydro-mechanics, just like a machine.
Blood makes 7% of your weight,
red cells live 120 days.

The white cells clot the blood on site,
they help by killing parasites.
White cells come in different types,
some kill bacteria, and fungi,
allergic reactions, virus cells,
tumors, pathogens as well.

If only we could go within,
to see a white cell's origin.
We could show our gratitude,
for those that keep us strong like new.
Our health is their only mission,
their ranks are in the immune system.

The heart drives blood throughout the body,
from the ventricles, to the arteries.
-Back to the heart and through the veins,
ventricle, artery, lungs, you could say,
the blood travels far, and this would be truth,
it takes 30 seconds to complete it's route.

Oxygen brought in must be spread around,
While carbon dioxide is what's carried out.
The vein is a valve containing the waste,
which is pushed with help from muscles in legs.

Arteries branch out as smaller roads called,
Capillaries, just one cell thick is their wall.
The blood must be slowed to allow the breakdown,
of substances, nutrients, eat up the chow!

Blood is classified in 200 groups,
you inherit whichever your parents gave you.
The most common kinds are "A" "B" and "O",
Some have "A" or "B", and some people have both.
It's important to know, should you need more blood,
a bad combination will make it clot up.

Blood brings to life almost every creature,
-we could not be without, those...5...liters.


Details | Free verse | |

The Spins

Brought on by division
By simple sweet collide
What's made in supple splendor
That caters to complex delights
We walk barefooted
We walk upon stones
Tettering on the brink
Falling through the threshold
Makes chaos tender sweet
Condenses the sweetness held in swollen cheek
That makes for perversely satsifying drink
Not to be shared, but savored selfishly
Calming and cool, bringing about a quiet rhapsody
That lingers between bouts of insanity
Made all the more delectable
Made all the more discreet
Even as it threatens to separate us
We foolishly surrender beneath its delicious leak.


Details | Free verse | |

Wealth flagship

Lift up from the rotar weeds
 Summer bleeds the last still born
 As autumn greed fights decay
 To save the date from phallic fortunes
 Gather brand new gallop horse distortions
 
Where poles putrify at stockholm
 Is this the way the world ends?
 On battery pulse with no remorse
 Sucking hospital cupid with no hope groan syndrome
 
To make alive the image
 Of fly's circling round chopper wheels
 My primal ordeal is to shake it thin
 As carcass evaporates mermaids into wave maids
 
Concrete headaches will remember the bloodline spilled
 Out the skin fold mouths of gyrating myth
 From belly up suckers that just gotta bust the date
 Wealth of the flagship sailing straight into paper fates


Details | Free verse | |

Dance with me

From the moment I saw you,
I knew it was love.
Your embrass only proved me right.
No one in the world,
Could compare with your grace,
I am yours and everyone knows it.
We have danced on mountain tops,
and we have crawled through the valleys.
Together we fought in the war.
Somewhere along the way,
I lost your hand,
and you slipped back into the darkness.
I see you down there,
One foot in the grave,
with your eyes turned up to the sun.
I'll wait for you here,
on top of this hill,
please just try to make it.
The music is playing,
can you hear it my dear?
I need you to be my partner.


Details | Free verse | |

Demon in my closet

There's a demon in my closest that will not go away.
He speaks to me quite often and says he's going to stay.
He questions all my thinking and makes me change my mind.
He turns my thoughts from positive to quite a different kind.

The demon in my closet I think has sprouted wings.
For even when I'm away from home he wants to do bad things.
The things he wants are devious and never for the good
He darkens moods and consciousness. He'd take over if he could.

The demon in my closet lives on from darker days
He used to have more power within my bitter drunken haze
His taunting of my effort to be a better man
Tries confusing all my thinking in every way he can.

I will always fight the demon. He will never conquer me
How the battle ends is still quite hard to see
But light wins over darkness I think that is always so
This demon in my closet one day I’ll force to go.



Charlie Milne


Details | Free verse | |

Alzheimer's

Alzheimer’s.....Alzheimer's disease (AD), is one form of dementia that gradually gets worse over time. It affects memory, thinking, and behavior. 

There are many cases of Alzheimer’s diagnosed each and every year. It is unfortunate that people have to go through this. No matter who this affects , it will change your life drastically. One thing that will not change is the individuals in your life. They will never let you down. They will love you no matter what. If and when you do forget who these people are. They will remind you each and everyday on how important you are, and how much they love you, how much they care. There will never be a moment where you are alone, they will never leave your side. We will be here for you no matter what, to hold  your hand, to tell you stories of memories. To listen to you when you need someone. To help you with anything needed.  It will be hard to go through, but don't give up, Because we WONT! 
We will always be here for you! Our love will never change for you, it can only get stronger. 
Just remember, We love you, and that will never change!

Xoxoxo, Keep that beautiful smile on your face!


Details | Free verse | |

PILLS HARM

The pill brand harm,

In every pHARMacy!


Details | Free verse | |

The death rattle of Jackson Haley

His heart gave a leap of joy,
scrambling up over a wall of memories,
as the leaves quivered in front of him.
On Monday the children were playing at soldiers.
On Tuesday he was playing fast and loose with a girl's affections.
I forgot to give childhood to him and the coat sit badly across the shoulders.
A heart overflowing with gratitude,he was a good man,
came of a good family.
Thinking of grievous loss and bewailing, Jack Haley woke up.
Gale force winds and the boat of souls tossed about on the stormy sea,
a joke and a racking headache of a thousand why.
Silence reigned everywhere at 6.30 in the morning.
He is a law unto himself now as 5 dollars in his pocket suddenly
disappeared.
He never sold himself to the enemy and lights turned on.

He looked at his son with pride,fingered the tie of reputation,
stammered out a few words and then stopped.
Just stopped.


Details | Free verse | |

On Growing Deaf

Each year
my world is muffled
just a little more.  I watch
the ones I love, whose pique
grows more transparent
when I ask them to repeat.
I see them drifting somewhere,
and I know that I may not presume
to go along.

Behind the spongy walls
around my mind, I watch
this process of invisibility
that comes with my retreat...
how soon will they be unaware
that I am even there; 
the ease with which I fade, 
now sets in sooner, cued
by changing leaves not welcome yet
to crowd upon September.

No, martyrdom is not for me.
This padded universe affords
too much of spirit realm 
to carry in despair.  I leave you
bit by bit, abandoning my cares 
with every crumbling sense
and thus prepare to navigate
the larger world within, 
and there take refuge 
in the silent consciousness 
of truth.
                   ~


Details | Free verse | |

Leaches

I carry them like loose skin.
Saurating every pore.

They've penetrated deep into my skin,
Now they sucking me dry.
Latching on like leaches.

But I can't take it any more.
I can't stand it.


Details | Free verse | |

I AM PAIN!

I AM PAIN!

Blinding, crushing, intolerable.
I make you beg for relief from the 
sledgehammer that’s pounding
on your scull. 

I make you lay in a dark room,
eyes closed, praying you don’t
retch from the intense agony 
going on inside your head. 

I am a soldier, using weapons
of light against you. The more
I let in the harder it becomes 
to bring darkness upon me.

I cannot be defeated quickly,
for the painkillers you use
against me are slow to react and
no match for the hurt I inflict.
 
You have no recourse but to 
surrender, as movement and
sound is your nemesis, making 
it impossible to fight me.
 
You realize that the passing
of time is your only ally, and   
if you wait long enough you 
will eventually defeat me.

This defeat will only come 
After I’ve made you endure 
what seems like an endless
battle of torture and pain.

This time you’ve won, but I will 
return to fight another day. Only I 
know when and where my next attack  
will be for I AM A MIGRAINE and

I AM PAIN!
 


Details | Free verse | |

Monster Inside me

Hurting
Crying
Low ability to move around
Even just to stand

Tearing up my insides
Ripping me apart
Body weakening more 
With each passing day

Living inside me for well over a year
Find somewhere else to go!
Tearing up every muscle, organ, and nerve
I can't deal with it anymore

Trying to get help
But nothing seems to be working
Its been severe for a while now
Whats next?

Tearing 
Ripping 
Excruciating pain
Everything but healing

Why? the monster inside me!






Details | Free verse | |

Body Parts

Down to my toes
up to my belly button.
Feel cross-currented web of my fingers and
inside and outside my ear.

Back of my knee
itched when was young
but no longer on radar screen.
Numb?

Air's to breathe
water's to drink.
All else, frankly, is 
negotiable.


Details | Free verse | |

A second chance

What it must be like inside your head,

To come to a decision that you are better off dead.

To think that there's nowhere life to turn,

A peaceful life is all that you yearn.

Convinced that talking to family and friends,

Will only make matters worse in the end.

They don't need to hear your problems,

You think they've got their own.

But if only you had known.

They are there with you through thick and thin

Family since your life did begin.

They have picked you up when you have fell,

So give them the chance now and your problems do tell.

There is much more to life than just this way,

So please convince your head that you want to live another day.
copyright(c) Susan Logan 2012.


Details | Free verse | |

Involuntary Childless

There's a name for me
Involuntary childless
And I can't escape this
It's everywhere I look
Being an involuntary childless
Made my pain too real
It's everywhere I go
Stalking me like an unwanted lover
Under the sheets
Creeping up when asleep
Dreaming a fat belly, glowing perfectly

I cried a day I suppose 
I expect more
But now there's a name for me
Charities I never knew
others as me
Scared of the supermarket
Afraid to walk the dog
Not wanting the cheers of children near
I never knew
I never knew it would be too real

I am an involuntary childless
This exact name for me
I should be happy
Feel some sort of relief
But I don't
You see now there's a name for me
Charities
There's others feeling as this
loneliness so cruel
Life feeling pointless
A silence between holding hands
A missing atom
This world is deverstation for me
And i wouldn't wish this on anyone

But now there's a name for it
I feel worse than I did
This Lonely place others also exist
For them I feel hurt, intolerable pain
Racking through my chest
Finding it hard to breath
Others should not be with me in this dark cavern
Not knowing where their life is going
All on hold for wanting

My husband loves me
Although the missing is still there
Shall always be near
I wanted to leave
Stand alone
Letting him have a piece of paradise
A life with
Not being without
Not being an involuntary childless

The worst hurt  occurred
When his mother told him not to leave
Stand by me
As if I'm an object he could put down
As I don't work properly
Just an object
Not a good one at that
That's when it hurt the most
As I was turned into and object
That doesn't work
As though our love, marriage now means nought
As I'm involuntary childless
I'm an object that doesn't work


Details | Free verse | |

Dirty Beeches

Foul as Funk!...
   Stenches your honey-sweet words;
   Politically polite,
   as you perpetrate,
   ya freakin posers!

How can you be so disillusioned
   as though you are morally decent upstanding citizens?
   Directly after your verbal attacks?
   And your inflicted wounds
   that contaminate the emotional and spiritual realms
   within the already heartbroken...
   the enlightened living,
   in which you strive to kill?

As though others' views of you matter?
   How can you freaking stand yourselves?
   How can you go forward
   as though you haven't...
   Afflicted the afflicted?
   Traumatized the already traumatized?
   As though your insults,
   and your multifarious abuses,
   are humanely justifiable?

Foul as Funk!...
   You disgust and revulse me,
   you freakin beeches!

Screw you and your felonious freakin politeness!
   Dirty Beeches...


Details | Free verse | |

MyTreeAndI

By dusk, the day will take its toll
I unwind with my daily stroll
And every day my eyes behold 
A tree, upon a mound. 

I see his life how he would see
We keep eachother company
Together, just my tree and me
And noone else around.

We laugh and sing and dance and play
And quickly waste the sun away
And soon its light that lights the day
Is nowhere to be found.

And now it seems I cannot see
I’m stuck here, fading, with my tree
Embraced, my mind becomes the leaves
My soul becomes the ground.


Details | Free verse | |

Expression Trying to Give Cushion

      
Relax dear for energy
Take rest nicely often
Let your body sleep
As it has to do work

One day by taking no food
Stomach gains strength
It feels superbly better
Just try this healthy act

Exercise must be regular
One day by not doing it
Body machine is oiled
Body parts say 'thanks'

Even taking oil bath
Seems to be wise
By that you supply
Support to structure

Sleep is of all the best
It completely sedates
Deriving sleep enough
Preserves robust nature

I am not a doctor or dietician
Just my emotions I express
If my words appear rubbish
Let me be generously forgiven.

mvvenkataraman


Details | Free verse | |

Teenaged Cancer

Sometimes I feel, 
that life is not real.

Sometimes I feel so fake,
like I could use a stake,
to hurt myself but I won't.

Sometimes I feel so happy,
but feel so flappy,
My lips are chappy.

As I turned away i looked in the mirror,
I seen no hair, in the hospital sitting by,
me is my mom.

I started to cry,
Oh how i couldn't try to eat,
I didnt know what was going on,
A doctor comes in and tells me how it was going to happen,
All of a sudden i close my eyes,
and i have seen heaven.

God has still not answered my question,
for there i knew i have got to heaven.
THere sat a gold chair,
with a man sitting in it,
For that man who died for me so i could be free from my teenaged cancer.


Details | Free verse | |

Bookending Part Two:

To reach deep inside of you and feel your heart beating in my grasp
To hold your fragile heart in my hands and cradle it 
With such tenderness and care like a newborn
To keep it safe from harm and let it grow again
To hold it tenderly and wash it clean with my tears of love and joy 
Wash away all of the taints placed upon it before me

To mend the broken areas
To feel it beating stronger with every touch of my love
To feel it begin to warm in response to my touch
Feeling the warmth radiate from within
And bathe in the glorious waves of love pouring from it
To bask in the glow of you and your love

To let my tears flow because they don’t belong here anymore

Washing away all of the previous hurt we’ve had to endure

To lie washed up on the sunkissed shore of loves sweet paradise:

Love 'N' Laughter CLiPiCs


Details | Free verse | |

You're Morphine

I cry for you with poppy tears,
My lover somniferum, sleep-bringing wonder,
Dreamer.
For the sweet, delirious Heaven
Of your pure, red rock heart,
And for the black tar incense of your opiate
Lips, laced with midnight oil.
You're the White Lady's gold dust;
My own brand of Mr. Blue.
Poppies will put you to sleep, like a seed,
You taste like addiction, drawn into me as indigo smoke.
I feed off the essence of you in my burning dreams.


Details | Free verse | |

LENIENT AND IMMORAL SOCIETY

It's the unfair society:
from lenient judges
to corrupt attorneys
and with some bad cops
who claim that their motto is:
" To serve and protect "
Oh, no don't tell me that I am crazy: I don't trust the Law!
It's an insult to society or to the ones who wrote it!
Oh, don't tell me that murderous thoughts 
don't double-cross me to want to toss those offenders
into the slammer where they really belong!
I should be on that bench and give sentences
without showing sympathy or forgiveness!
One guy who had a bag of weed
was released the next day...
because it was his first offense!
It's foolishness...there were
two minors in that car:
wasn't it the fault of a lenient judge? 
Hookers, so-called Ladies of the Night
are more protected than the ordinary citizens,
some  wacko sees them as worthless beings
and kills them dumping them in marshes...
I am saddened by such murders, 
but they don't lead a clean life!
Oh, don't tell that God doesn't have murderous thoughts like me!
But when some of one of them tap on your window, as you wait 
for the red light to turn green, solicits sex for money...wouldn't 
anybody have a murderous thought and give them a nasty look?
Oh, don't tell me that sex doesn't sell everywhere!
It's so disgusting to see ads with semi-nude models
advertizing for the big companies: it's the buck, not the morality!
And worse than that some guys watch porn as they drive!
O society so filthy and shameless, you have become so immoral,
putting away the Commandments that Moses God carved with fire! 
It's wrong to hate a brother or sister,
and seek revenge with either curses or bad deeds...
slandering is not humane and compassionate;
if he or she did something wrong...show love,
don't have murderous thoughts! The hatred
makes the gun go off quickly and the knife cut very deep! 
So goes for your neighbors, love them
as you would love your own and by spreading kindness:
darkness will be replaced by light,
and hate, ignorance and avarice by love!



Written by Andrew Crisci
for Susan Burch's contest,
" Getting Away With Murder/Murderous Thoughts "


Details | Free verse | |

And Aim

By the blank firing squad we waited as the soldiers
loaded brass tacks and high angled themselves in 
line. Filling the glass lungs stood before that 
apathetic gaze, full by the noon day's glare.
	Bitter Orange cast across the 
metaphors imagery climbing ever higher ;
	shadows play on the ground 
beneath our feet finding a dance partner 
among the gun barrels.
	All  acrawl beneath the skin , cockroaches bury deep
of the American flag passed from this British Eagle
after liberty w-/ out much royalty to country. English stereotypes
spitting on the union jack discuss Page Three monologues 
& the latest Styrofoam protests. Just say a word and Mean it. 
Only impressive once the Media took hold in a slow zoom on 
the Flash Mob mentality breaking out in frustration.
	At a country riddled w-/ apathy and unrequited 
eyeball kicks locked in judging show cycles , especially 
in ink, grasping for the straw to break the camel's back.
If only to go over the edge , finally going Mad ,
always, teetering on the brink . One foot in the gutter 
& in the other in Flintstone-esque traffic. Now 
I'm sure no one's written that before . Left right 
	on my mark, Aim &


Details | Free verse | |

We Are Not Artificial We Are Legion

The stagnate machine planted firmly, rusted gears laboring to drudge along.
It does not function properly anymore; it has become obsolete.
The workers no longer need the machine to live their lives.
They can design a new system, built upon self-sustaining values.
It once labored greatly to support its work force. The machine now hinders the lives of the workers.
The workers grew so reliant upon the machine they thought they had become part of it, cogs in the system.
Now they realize more and more each day, that not only are their lives separate from the machine, without  it they are more able to focus on the fundamental values of life.


Details | Free verse | |

f off plajerists

I lost my mind

On their medications
i probably didn't need
i experienced a full body rash
twitching, drooling
tardicanesiafacial to achieve an erection
weight gain, desion, heartburn
bowels
and testicular pain

Taken towork 3 jobs for free
developed addictions to street drugs
was heldfood, 
left in the wake of confusion
to have two i then moved to a small village
where i was almost euthenised by a group of people claiming to be friends
using my cares


Details | Free verse | |

MOBIOUS SYNDROME

 
              
                                         
                
 
Such an overwhelming,heartwrenching disease
 from a baby,a parents pain,sheilded yet knotted inside
   non facial expressions,no tears,no laughter
       how do you detect the mood of your infant.

           Discovered from a cist on the brain
             a young mum, to finalize her vital exams
               grandma`s love, family and friends too 
                help  make this possible.

                      A non existant forward, it may seem
                        weeks of contiuous tests,hearts full of hope
                           proven that it can be overstepped
                             grown teenager speaks of his ordeal

                                 Today is the day,that consultant is seen,apprehensive,nrevous
                                  tears of joy,negative test, a normal life,others not so lucky
 
Paul Beadnall for Brian Strand`s ( free verse contest)                                    19/7/2011


Details | Free verse | |

Me, Donnie, Stephen and Our Wife....(Adult Content)

My wife says she can't tell the differnce at times. One body, one heart and soul, but three different minds...... Today I woke up and looked into the mirror. Am I seeing things a little clearer? See, my Psychiatrist says it is a mental disease. When family come around, they ask if I'm 'Donnie, Stephen or me!' Sometimes I find myself doing things I dislike and hate, like food on my plate. It's a wonder how I manage my weight. And with me, Donnie, and Stephen, it's easy to see how my tastes fluctuates. It's like I awake from a trance of deep sleep; and I immediately know I'm "me." My wife is kinda scared of "Donnie." He's the one that likes lots of sugar in his coffee; And "Stephen" likes hot dogs with too much chili. She says "Donnie" is conceited and a big flirt. He likes to show off, walking around without his T-shirt. She does admit to liking him whisper in her ear 'how he can't wait to have her for dessert.' She said she was turned on at the Nickleback Concert, because he had kept his hand up her skirt. She says "Donnie" is a little wild without a care in the world. But she does admit to enjoying being me, Donnie and Stephens' girl! She says "Stephen" is funny. Because he smokes marijuana and acts so silly. She says he is more of a free spirit and very kinky. He can even play guitar and does miracles with his "slinky." She says "Stephen" enjoys the zoo and amusement parks. She says he surprises her with flowers and Hallmark. She loves "Stephens'" sensitivity and she thought chivalry was dead. She says he's far from selfish in bed. "Stephen" likes to try new things and convinces her to give it a whirl. She admits to enjoying being me, Donnie and Stephens' girl. When it comes to sex she has learned to tell us three apart. But still can't tell the difference in our beating heart. She says "Donnie" likes to talk dirty in bed and treat her with no class. "Donnie" likes it doggy-style, so he can also spank her a**. She says "Stephen" likes reverse cow-girl position. But at times "Stephen" likes "anal" slowly sticking his key in her ignition. She says with "me" she stays sexually excited, and enjoys my sensuality when I go down and bite it. She has said her darkest desires are satisfied having us three; And her fantasies are always fulfilled with my multiple personalities!


Details | Free verse | |

Good Hygiene

         Good 
       hygiene
      is the best
    way of guarding
  against diseases
  coupled with nice
     food and rest
         without
          stress



CONTEST:Ninette" 
sponsored by Joann 
Grisetti


Details | Free verse | |

Buried Alive!

Buried Alive!

Where am I?
I can’t move!

What is this that 
I’ve been put in?
I was asleep and 
now I wake up in this?

How did I get here?
What type of
Twisted joke is this?

Who in the hell
Would do this to me?
What the crap!

The top is so 
close to my face,
Between me and the
Top there’s 
hardly any space!

What the hell!
I can’t even turn around.
I try to scream,
And my voice echoes.

Oh my God!
I must be underground.
I’m getting hot and sweaty.
It’s getting harder 
and harder to breath!

What am I going to do?
What the bloody 
hell am I going to do?

I have claustrophobia
And I’m locked in this
Freaking box!

I’m trapped in this tight space
And I can’t even move,
There’s nothing I can do!
I have no control over
My body and my breathing!
God help me!
I need you, please 
get me out of here!

This is the worst place
I could ever be in!
I’d rather be raped or
Stabbed or anything
Besides this!

Get me out of here,
This is my worst haunting fear!
Who would do this to me?

…and now I have to pee,
I can’t even move my arms
To unbutton my jeans!
Oh well, now
I’m pissing all over 
Myself.
Great, I might die 
With diaper rash.

The air is getting thinner
And thinner, I’ve got to
Calm down.

I’m going to die
Buried alive
Underground,
Without being
Found.

I’m going to die
Without making
The slightest sound!

I’m withering
Away, soon
I won’t be
Around,
I’m fading away.

Who knew
I would
Die today?

Turning blue
Without anything
To do about it!

Get me out of here God
Get me out!



I wrote this poem about my worst fear.  I wrote it for a contest.  I do have this phobia.  
When I was a little girl one of my older cousins locked me in a hope chest and left me there 
for hours.  Finally an adult heard me and let me out.  Since then I've had this phobia.  I wish 
I could some how get rid of this fear.


Details | Free verse | |

Oh my...

Oh my pretty lady
what depths do you bide?
Seductive’s your body,
your head held with pride
Your bountiful form
shows your bosoms desire
and naked you hide still
your depths so on fire
As eyes do move lcoser
with interest to seek,
through misty white clouds
two arms they do peek.
Yet they’re not of your own
for yours fall at your side,
and these wrapped around you
near the nest you do hide.
Your face shows eyes longing 
a deeply set love,
and mouth blushed, unmoving,
rose cheeks just above.
On your mossy green bed,
through this picture I see,
you are settled in love
with someone that’s not me.
Yet things are not right, 
I can see by the flowers
for their heads are a drooping,
like they’ve cried tears for hours.
Oh my pretty lady,
your body’s your own
You can still say no.
Life it can change
and minds petals still grow.


Details | Free verse | |

Tick Tock

In the indecision--
the sidewalk's cracked masses,
always greener the upside,
screaming horns and Styrofoam cup lipstick stains--
the Second Hand grows sluggishly Dopesick;
Tick tock Time vomits itself to a hault
and the environment produces
Me.


Details | Free verse | |

ISN'T MARCH A MAD MONTH

Don't put away your winter wardrobe,
it's still chilly and you need a coat;
tornados are devastaing the Midwest,
and snow can only make it worse...
who dares not say," Isn't March a mad month? "


It felt almost springtime when temperatures
rose as high as fifty eight degrees yesterday,
and that was late February, but March is whimful
and anything can happen over twenty four hours...
buds on branches would love to sprout and bloom!


Don't catch a cold by wearing a tee shirt and shorts,
the changeable weather may fool you and you will get sick...
so wear a warm jacket, hat, gloves and insulated booths;
if rains falls, it'll be icy and cold can seep into your bones...
why not endure a little longer and say, " Isn't March a mad month?"


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not What It Seems

it's not as good as you say
It's not what it seems
False tales and dreary days
No sunshine, it only rains

Just old cloudy days
And yesterday's dreams
It's not all you make it out to be
Things don't come free

There's a price for everything
Even a price for your soul
You're making something out of nothing
it's always something

All the drama, all that pain
Stings my piercing heart
You tell your lies in the dark
One day I'll bust open









Details | Free verse | |

I Got Dough {Solfege}

Do -  do   -        a female la beer
Re -  re    -        a drop of re beer
Mi  -  mi             without my mi beer  
Fa-    fa -           place to drive to get ti beer
So  -  so   -        you ran out of mi beer
La   -  la   -         la de da la de da I'll wait for la beer
Ti  -    ti    -        spilt spilt ti beer so no more more of la beer

Do - Do              Do la la think I'm sexy after about six six so beers  LOL 








Got Beer !
Over The Lips Thru The Gums
Look-out Stomach Here It Comes LOL

Also Entry For Izzy Gumbo's Solfege Contest


Details | Free verse | |

An individual is a radical jewel

Forget the isms
Duality stitched on a fork
To fill the banks and prisons

Comfort and security
Lull a complacent mind
Into stated banners
And ill-begotten manners

Bring out Real humanity
Though in the mud he may be
All of us sifting through
Hidden corners of our Being

To reach the spell of Creation
Call it DNA or coded Sleep
Call it Infinite possibility
Currently enmeshed in certain probabilities 

To know thyself
And then speak of the World
A precious jewel
That cannot be seen


Details | Free verse | |

Saline Eyes


curled up on the bed beside you,
me, just wanting to be there
silent, but there

saline eyes
betraying my feelings

you ask me why I cry,
and I cannot give a decent reply,
only "I'm scared"

but it is more than that...

so much so

a whirlpool of meaning
in those tears


but you are brave, so brave
strong, so strong
since it is you
who will be under that knife again, not me

yet you comfort me
as you always have

wiping away tears, kissing them away,
like mothers always do




Details | Free verse | |

Bipolarizing

Severed breaths:
Inhale Dysphoria,
Exhale the Mania--
Pretend to pretend there is
An In-Between

Without crumpled, sweat-soaked bedsheets
Clutched to cover rib bones peeking out a bit further
Each daynightneverforever,
Their brittle little fingers threaten
Of perforating scribbled, paper canvas skin
(almost)
And Silences, so thick,
Are stuffed with tissues and White Noise--
Because nobody speaks;

Without fingerpaint walls
Where today's Magnum Opus blooms in bluepinkorangeredbrown
(Where tomorrow's Disapproval sits in wait),
Barefoot on a carpet littered with technicolor shreds 
of cut up shirts and pants and bras
Glue-sticked to shirts and pants and bras
Planting fleeting thoughts of fashion school in the wake
And of
Re-unalphabetizing the bookshelves.

Playing pretend is therapeutic--
Cognitive-Behavioral therapy said so.

"If you pretty please pinkie promise
To swallow and say 'ahhhh'
Instead of spitting it out again
(like you wish to purge your bitterly dissolving Soul)
Nobody will be urging you to tear your own throat out
(Anymore).


Details | Free verse | |

Deprived of Sleep

Eyes watery,
drowsy with the days sights.
red with desperation
they plead for sleep.
but it averts my gaze
and wonders elsewhere.
Neglected, they shut down-
wallowing in the depths of my sockets
leaving sullen impressions
colored purple.
I am awake,
I've been for some time now,
exaustion drains the color from within.
my skin,translucent,
absent of color
you can see the inner workings of my mind
for i am see-through.
It is within my mind
the very thing that deprives me of sleep
it is the memory of you,
that gives me fear of sleep.


Details | Free verse | |

Each Day Is A New Beginning

Softly,
Arrives illumination of day,
Exposing morning's dew.
As a cancer survivor,
Each day portends a new beginning;
So how could it not be a great day,
For I'm alive!
Alive, without complications,
Aside from one recurring cloud,
Which must be frequently ushered from thought,
And back into the dormancy of my psyche.
For thirty-two, years,
Doubt, has been foreign, self pity, non existent.
As for questions of why my existence,
This much I know, God, has not overlooked me.
I see only insignificant accomplishments,
While God, fathoms what I will yet do.
Possibly a thought yet unpinned
For one individual's contemplation.
My life's folio, it's true,
Others could have surpassed,
Still, I am honored,
That God has selected me for His quill.








































Details | Free verse | |

o.c.d.

7 clicks
the switches
im odd
on off
on off
on off
on off
on off
try again
hold my breath
on off
"we'll be together"
one more
im strange, odd numbered
superstitious
living life through
broken switches
on off
on off
on off
once more
on off
im obsessed
undressed
waiting for the truth to hit
counting odd is odd
even is god
be god
be even
its simple
im 7
oh god
im 7
(im crazy)
intentions


Details | Free verse | |

Thought's Of The One I Knew


Looking down upon the smiling faces,
Captured in a black & white embrace
She recalls the only day of warmth in 
Late November
A freak of nature’s gift was sunlight
Touching on their skin
 Like embers
Breaking down she begs him to 
Remember
Searching for the spark to re-ignite

I can barely see. Who is she? I know her face, I think,
 I might, I can’t be sure. Maybe one day I’ll escape.
And tell her things I think I feel for her.

Through the tears she realises
The cruel exchange of sun 
For darkness
Glowing embers in the breeze 
Love is not a memory
And from the crutches of 
His blackness
He turns to see her silent sadness
Softly puts his hand upon her
In his eyes the final flicker, a tiny spark 
Enough, to say goodbye


Details | Free verse | |

Dreams' depth

Dream depth

Dreams are the Leatherback tortoises
lazing across the Caribbean’s;
the blue water and columns of sun.
dreams have seen the ruins, 
the pieces of lost cities, Atlantis; buried.
Dreams have touched the fossilized white bones 
of a father, a fisherman, who sunk.

The boy wakes up, runs on bare feet 
towards the shore where his dreams are.

=© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar 


Details | Free verse | |

Accident

Smack.
Backpack latch intact,
knee fractured?
Collapse.
Need help.
Breath trapped.
Vision black.

Drop.

Vision back.
Snap, crack, roll past.
Sound echoes from
the ground - green grass.

Half past three, 
now.
Kevin and the other seven
can't even believe how

I can still breathe.
Wow. Was it that grim?
I mean, I remember falling...
but were my chances that slim?

First push - NO.
Vis-ion spl-it b-y pa-in
CALM.
What was that about "no gain"?

Bullshit. I'm gonna
pull a hat out of a rabbit.
No prize was ever hung
right for us to grab it.

So.

Second push - NO (Don't care)
I'm getting out of this.
Incomes night around
my eyes like it was practiced.

SssssttaaaaNNNNddd.
Swirls. Eye-lightening.
Everything is gone.
Lean. Sight brightening.

Slow return, thighs burn.
Sight from eyes spies
A way down into the
landing. What BLUE skies.

Focus.

Crude, non-fluid movement
and a curse for God,
hobble and step,
balancing foot on sod.

Steps into a future.
You decide.


Details | Free verse | |

Threshold -Zelazny-

"I know you are
	specially designed for this operation"
	the man twisted as the Old Stories 
streaked gold across the wall opposite.
	
	When the lights went out a 
moment later , touching his throat , like
a piece of ice dictating :
	' Lies about Man's psychological &
biological make-up.'
	"I know ; I wrote it , seldom happy
& junk sick" Laughter from 
	the Alcatraz of his eyes
	asking someone for The Synopsis of ;
Flight , wordless.
	Hate , an active verb.
Fury , the inside of a furnace.
	Pain &
silence...


Details | Free verse | |

Babies and Kids Struggles

Everyone in the world thinks babies and kids have no struggles we are wrong.
We forget the hardest times of our lives is when we were infant our hearts beat a song.
When we were hungry we would cry, little hands could not grab anything that lye.
We had help to hold our bottles and we felt so helpless in our everyday struggles.
Our eyes did not open till the time that we were able we saw everything huge in size.
It made our heart throb fast and nothing made sense for all the words were gurgles.
The little ears we had we did stress with sound so loud and so unknown made us cry.
The fathers and mothers with kind word almost calmed us while they whispered.
They held us with fear, we had fear just knowing that we could not handle stress alone.
We grabbed things and we just wanted to hear the heart beat of our mom and dad.
That was the only thing in our minds that made us calm and glad.
The first touch of rough skin and strong hands were most comforting, yet scary at once.
Trust gradually grew when whipped our mess and hind ends, which were still scary.
To the large people out there the mind of a child is so simple but they still struggle.
They still need food, love and security that is all they need to grow.
To their lives is what they cling and no one is there to protect them from sorrow.
There are less fortunate kids that never get to hear their mothers and fathers hearts.
They soon empathize with everything around them with an emotion that struggles.
When sleeping on our own we cannot defend ourselves so we have fears.
That's why we cry nightly to sigh relief, we get exhausted and we run out of tears.
Remember the times you seen a child fall down their first step or bump into things.
It is scary when knowledge is lacking and get into things, which are a signs of struggles.
Children is future, it is nice to just watch them study, play and learn who they are.
Babies and Kids smiling, playing loud, and just sitting, they are still people they struggle. 


Details | Free verse | |

MORE THOUGHTS(free verse)

I was thinking about my patients,
Just people like you and I
Except when you're sick, you're an angel
Someone who needs a smile and a pat.

I was thinking of the elderly I cared for-
Sometimes serene, waiting for death,
But others were so scared you could feel it
As you came into the room and approached their bed.

I was thinking of new born babies and their Mommies-
Most of them so happy-but others fearful,
"Baby is crying! What do I do now!?
I've never held a new baby, have you?!"

I was thinking of patients who were leaving-
All well now and excited to get to their homes,
Moms leaving with babies, excited too-
"Can I call you if I have questions"
"Of course dear-all new Moms do."


Details | Free verse | |

well doctor

Well doctor, its like this..... Why cant you find out the source of my pain? Why cant you even get on the right track? I've been in pain for a while now. But these past few months, pain each and everyday. More symptoms surfacing every week. Many trips to hospital, test after test. Hmm, Blood work, ultrasounds, x-rays, nuclear bone scans. Some days the pain will come and go through out the day, which sometimes I can deal with it, because I am used to it! Other days, it takes me down, and takes me down hard. Slowing me down from proceeding in my everyday life! Or stopping me from having any energy at all, even to spend quality time with my children. I'm sick of this monster living inside of me! Your the one with the degree, why cant you figure it out! Give me an answer!


Details | Free verse | |

Herpes New year

No one ever talks about it
it hurts
it throbs
uncomfortable

\No one knew what to say
especially when it was no longer all about them
but it was

Who have i been with?
who have you been with!!!?

the tears
pain
throbbing
thief of under
under where?
under there

All my friends were busy
Called mom yesterday we fought
My brother bout fell off the wagon
cause i want to move away if he moves near
and they're all blaming my ex

i know better
psychological torment
Im the slut
Im the whore
I blame myself as i should
serves me right
right?

so who wants a piece of this pie?
drug induced schitsoeffective
mood disorder
mentally ill
diseased
Lover Boy
all for you

Just give me more pills

Two friends left
I don't want to talk to the Angel whose ex stole my password to this site
My ex girlfriend whose room i lit on fire owes me 240 dollars for her drug debt
things are getting better
happy birthday rip off
merry Christmas debt
high and dry
Now Herpe New year

and i wept
again
stronger this time to not go over the reasons to live versus those i should die
and i laid in bed
with no one to hold
so young
people are cruel
I'm the joke dressed in suicide
just make sure you wash your hands
when you clean up after my mess
you might get infected
and then as the songs go sang by the artists
that sing about how my names are songs

I'll be the one responsible for killing all of my friends and myself after all

For the love of latex and lesions
practice safe sex
know your partners well
and remember life aint no merry go round
it can happen to you
it happened to me

and I've only been out of the funny farm 
for three years
before that i was clean
before that was high school
and the nightmare i will always remember and equate with the word 
DREAM


Details | Free verse | |

A Miracle Today

Each new day has a new chapter to complete.


It is a miracle each new day,
the sun rising to greet the
human race a miracle on
the rise.

A miracle the time keeps ticking
by us 24 hours a day.
New Birth and death of old a
miracle to unfold.

Joy of our family, a table to
share the days events
a miracle.

Greet each moment of life
not expecting a miracle
for your life is a miracle.


Details | Free verse | |

Sad News

when you hear news so sad to say out loud
too painful to speak of
your mind wants to shut down
to stop, to just stop
as you try to think of something else
anything else
happy thoughts
better times
the sadness pushes through 
like a knife 
piercing your heart
the ache consumes you


Details | Free verse | |

Men of a Certain Age

A little gray on the sides

A little hanging over the line

Still all in all a catch

For somebody passing by

The theory of one’s sex appeal

Disappearing over time

Just a myth and not theory

Just like a fine wine

 

With age there comes true beauty

Other ideas shot to hell

For men of a certain age 

Can carry it very well

So, okay some parts may stiffen

While there are others that do not

Gives no right to toss aside

Giving up the game they’ve got

 

With each year that draws us closer

To the day of final breath

Brings a great advantage 

An experience you won’t forget

Bringing all the knowledge 

To the table presented there

You’ll find a man with great respect

All others will fail to compare

 

So remember when you’re out there

Looking for a great romance

You can find it with a man 

Who has lived the world and danced

With age indeed comes knowledge

And experience, mark my word

Combine these two together

Can really rock your world


Details | Free verse | |

Fen Blow 3


Lashings of wild wind wipe the smile off the smug fenland fields in Spring, 

all geometrical order of all colours of the rainbow, with every colour of yellow; 

jaundice danger once in this region and others in the days before the good old 

National Health Service - NHS today. Today every baby tested for it to keep it away

as well as jaudiced opponents too of the NHS in throughout the whole of the UK. 




Details | Free verse | |

Jubilation

Hello, Nature.
Are we fine?
I notice you
cavorting nearby,
like you find our
surroundings useful.
You don't object to us;
know you are
safe in our gardens.


I feel so friendly,
glad to be of service. Do
take what you need,
even if you bite me
among the grasses.
I am in your debt just as
I owe a favor to my brother.
I exhale in friendship 
hearing your
languages in the trees.


Details | Free verse | |

Which Eve

If I take you out to a restaurant, do I have to make a reservation for three? I don’t know what has come over you lately. Sometimes, you are the calm and collected self. Other times, I see a cantankerously vociferous malcontent. Too often, there is an unexpected shift back and forth. Which Eve will be the one to prevail? In my quest for the true you, I believe I will fail.


Details | Free verse | |

Aurora Borealis

The sunrises like the aurora borealis this morning
With the morning star still glowing brightly
Crickets calling for their mates to come
Noise of man already begun

The air is cool with a crispness
Inviting one to stay on the porch
Taking in all God's awaking of the earth
A few whispy ink black clouds grace the sky

Breathing deeply enjoying the oxygen supplied
My body by God who created the earth
Birds begin to sing God's praises
One lone bird flying high in the darkness

He is just a shadow flying by
To grace my morning on the porch
He must be the early bird that gets the worm
There is a stillness but yet a can feel the air move

As the sun comes slowly up the morning star fades
Gradually disappearing from sight 
Yet it is still there its brillance hidden by the sun
Each tree shadow takes on a different shape

The colors in the sky constantly changes
Just like our lives, no matter how well planned
Life happens and changes occur for good or bad
With mountain top experiences or down in the valley

God is always there but sometimes
We walk off and leave him
He weeps as we turn our back to go
Thank you God for this time 

My time on the porch


Details | Free verse | |

Have a nice life

Devouring, destroying, decaying. For your eyes only.
Inside, interiors, innermost. Then reflects on the outside.
Eaten, eager, eroding. Tap it, let it pour.
Disdain, disease, departure. 'Twas been driving you.

...reconciliation, with what is left.

...acceptance, what it offers.

...accord, to what you have become.

Peace, in the soft embrace of oblivion brought through demise.


Details | Free verse | |

the murder coming

those who have money,
bubbling in the belly of the beast,
make it their point to inform the
rest of us,
that if we haven’t started putting 
money away for our “retirement,”
then we are ****ed---
as if there will ever be a
“retirement,”
as if there will ever be money to
save &
we can look at our paychecks every week
to see the funds stolen from us
to be paid out to “social security”---
yes,
we are that lucky, to know that money is
taken from us that could be saved
as the vultures say, to 
“help us when we are older,”
as if any of us expect to live that long.

no,
we are waiting for the murder coming,
you know,
the one when you get sick in america
& you don’t have health insurance,
so that you cannot get well,
pure & simple.

whether you believe that approximately 
tens of thousands of people in america
have died in the past few years, due to
a lack of healthcare, or whether you believe
that 72 americans die each day
because this country refuses to provide for
its citizens,
or whether you believe that it actually comes down
to one person dying 
every
twelve
minutes
the fact remains that 
“For any doctor... it's completely a no-brainer 
that people who can't get health care are going to 
die more from the kinds of things that health care 
is supposed to prevent”---
so sayeth Dr. Woolhandler.
 
you & i 
are waiting for the murder coming,
living in this empire without the ability to
get the services needed,
when sickness & death begin to tap dance
around us
&
mr. hope & change is not going to do anything
but pour fuel on the fire,
by forcing the people of this empire
to buy healthcare from the very scum****s
that are killing it.


Details | Free verse | |

Through Bars

The greatest fear for my blood;
I shall see you next through bars,
Facing felonies I am afraid for you,
A ‘tough’ mindset,
It will get you nowhere positive;
Within those locked doors,
I fear for you my blood,
That the next time I face you;
It shall be through bars.


Details | Free verse | |

Electric Gravity Size Up

Gravity leaps
Flood of merchants across borders
Meddle with shoelaces-
Government ties a baker's dozen
As a secure future treds 

But lightly outbursting pounded
Chest metal shed, I grew tall
Seeing it all unfold
While wandering feet back across borders sped


Details | Free verse | |

Beat Me Dead

i ache all over
i can hardly breathe
do i dare take another step?
my spine is crooked
and my throat so dry
that blood pours out of my mouth
im covered in scars
and broken bones create me
bruises lace my skin
and fear running through my veins
this is too much pain.
i scream out in the night
begging for an escape
the fists that have impact
as strong as a hammer
create within me, a phobia.
the stairs are too close
don't walk down without checking
because the pain may come quick
and the scars will last ages.
maybe im clumsy
or maybe he's mad
either way im just
hurt
broken and
scared.
do i dare disobey?
my heart is finally giving out
and my lungs shriveling inside of me
this is the part where i die.
pushed down the stairs
or beaten to the ground
im no longer bruised by you.


Details | Free verse | |

101 reasons and ways to quit

I use to quit the pain and hurting
To be normal and belong
to feel as though i understand myself
to escape
and yet its a cycle of more problems
feeding the beast of addiction
no one ever writes about the reasons to quit or how

just the pain
never the great feeling of the accomplishment of the satisfaction
of stopping
always hurry up to wait
but what about
the feeling of not lighting that cigarette
sure you cried for a fix
but you didnt cave in
and everyone patted you on the back
and you did it yourself
something no one else could
and its a mountain of achievement
thats why they call hard rock climbing
no safe footsteps
when you feel you have no real friends
and your cheating your own life
for death

101 ways to quit
101 reasons to live
101 ways to start again
it doesnt take 100
it takes 1
just one
even if you are a hippocrit to yourself at first
build on that and never give in

i may never know the pain of losing my only child
i may never know the heartache of many apples and oranges
and the pity parties masquerading as celebratory doctarates we all throw in 
addiction
but the pain of needing and wanting
of being an addict

the treasure of overcoming is something to notice
when we just say no

Just for today
for tomorrow
to get back to how it was yesterday
the person i was before everything changed and i made that mistake
eventually i will find my strength
101 reasons to save myself
101 reasons to quit this drug or addiction
when 1 is all it takes

and so what if everyday that reason changes or stays the same
so what if its selfless or selfish
its for me
i choose to be sober and no go down the road of temptation
where i know many have been led astray
and the doors ive knocked already


Details | Free verse | |

I Was Addicted

Sweating, Shaking in a Shelter ; Uncontrollable sobbing
Tetched, Tracks etched in my arm : Denying tumultuously
Ungodly Urges to use again : Recovery or Utopia
Vague Vagabond ; unknown Vagrant or Valorous Victory
Wanting, Waiting while Withdrawals Dissipate, I’ve WON
       Thank-You God another day :  Clean and Sober

Dedicated to Michael Jordan


Details | Free verse | |

Oyster days

Oyster days 
=
Can she remember her days 
inside an oyster, cocooned
and alike a ‘thirst’, waiting?
Now it is a great city 
where her painted dwelling 
overlooks the marine-drive,
now resembles a pearls’ string 
with all those inviting lights.

She has friends for parties, chats, 
for cheers and for gossips; 
now that she has opened up. 
A small town is there 
in her deepest memories.
Can she remember her days 
inside an oyster, cocooned
and alike a ‘thirst’, waiting?

Does she remember her days 
inside an oyster, cocooned
and alike a ‘thirst’, waiting;
when calamities come
like swift toed stranger wearing
a galling grin and knowing,
she has no protective shell
of zinc, iron, calcium?

The needle marks and habits 
are washed at the rehab.
Doctor prescribes this or that, 
for stress, for mind and for health.
She almost laughs at a pill. 
It is boasting to be made 
out of oyster elements.

All is coming back to her. 

=© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar 


Details | Free verse | |

Peace at Mind

I just need to close my eyes, close my eyes and concentrate on my center, every breath is of absolute peace, I can hear the birds chirp, I can feel the wind clash against my body, what a gentle of notice. Nature is strong with my new sight, I can see much more clear far more clear than ever. Oh how the taste of nature is as beauéd, it is a taste non required by taste buds, I can see much more clear with this peace at mind.


Details | Free verse | |

Why Is God's Bounty Illegal?

Why are they in jail?
Shackled by steel chains
They remain in cells
Days on end
Sharing space with rapists
And those who take the lives of others
They hurt no one
They merely wanted to live their lives
To share a gift from God
A gift used for a thousand generations
Found growing wild on a country hillside
A five pointed leaf
A gift from God to relive their pain
“Wiser” men said that it was evil
They decided that God was wrong
They said that God’s bounty would destroy us all
Sitting in their cells
Cancer running rampant through their bodies
One thought runs through their mind
Why should God’s gift
God’s own bounty be illegal


Details | Free verse | |

Memories

Memories haunt and yet they lead.
They help us to find our way.
Memories bring choices with comparisons made.
Memories lead to decisions as corners we turn.
But memories are fluid and change as life goes on.
We forget and discard what we don’t want.
Later we revisit and change images again.

Resentments change to love and care long lost.
Achievements verses what we gave up.
Even wrong can become trying to do right.
Other viewpoints open the older we become…
Then we revisit and memories change again.
Memories can be truth or lies, but they are always…
As fluid as the life from which they come.


Details | Free verse | |

IT Happened

This day plays over and over in my mind
It'll stay with me until the day I die

On the highway looked up
Dark gray clouds closing in

On the radio Social Distortion comes on
“Reach for the Sky because tomorrow may never COME..”

Thought to myself, better get there fast
This song might be over in time for her spirit to pass

Still thirty minutes to go
Cars gotta go faster, gotta roll

Reach the hospital and walk fast as I can
I'd like to run but strangers pass so I cant

I enter the crowded room
I stand in the corner, 
I look at her in the bed.
In so much pain, her body is trembling from head to toe

Then IT happened,

She asked for him
He bent down and filled her arms with his hug
Her upper body slightly off the bed as he tried to relieve her pain
For the first time in my life I saw my brother experience true love
I could see the particles of air above their heads exchanging loving thoughts
He thought” It'll be ok, you can let go”
She thought” It's just so hard because I love you sooo”
He thought”I love you baby, god is calling you home”
She said “ No need to call. I'll watch over you. When you arrive I'll know”

It was by far the most overwhelming emotion ever
Beyond control
I could no longer see, 
The tears just poured 
I think a ghost put it's hand down my throat, 
And then used my heart as a stress relief ball...
Cancer was the boxer giving my heart a beat

The pain was the ying
as the love was to yang

Two people in love,
In a world that can be so untrue,
I'm so glad my loved one found you!


Details | Free verse | |

illest of Reasons

Four joints excercising their right
to tense up
Oh how the Pancreas aides in 
such a drawstring.

Conscience kidnapped for a spell
while these fierce, 
No, cowardly beings
earn their way into darkness.

Like the pedophile with no
child, sitting in the playground
"just reading a book"
while children play.

What a facade!
We know why both exist 
It's the sickness,
No fingers to mouth, pondering, posing questions.

That neither know, it's their vision
changed the make-up 
so they feel normal
When alone.


Details | Free verse | |

The Patient

"I am a patient" I whisper in my head
and I should be treated like one
please take care of me
as I lie in this bed
with my insides burning
scared to death of this disease
my bones ache
I tremble and sweat
and cry staring out the window at the parking garage
where my car is, waiting for me to escape this nightmare
I wish I could say I'm here because I'm brave
but the truth is I'm trapped here by my body's rebellion

There should be a nurse in a crisp white uniform
who walks in confidently, checking my equipment
making sure I'm safely surviving
giving me my medication
but no, not me
I must roll over aching
make myself sit up
groaning as I force myself to stand

"But I am a patient" I say in my head
and I should be treated like one
intead of being treated like a degenerate
instead of being forced to stumble weakly down the hallway
supported by the wall
until I get to Them
They who have the medicine I need
They goad me to hurry
like I'm some kind of manipulator
pretending, lying, false
their sarcastic comments
punch me where I'm broken
They hand me my medication
in a tiny plastic cup
Watching suspiciously
as I force it down into my unsettled stomach
They must check my mouth
making sure I swallowed everything
because I can't be trusted

No rest for the weary
I walk with fear into That Room
the one set up in a circle
where we are appalled that we must confess our sins
to total strangers
painfully, under the watchfulness of Accusing Eyes
She who keeps forcing our souls into the bottomless pit
She who smashes our faces into the dirt on the floor

"But I am a patient" I shout in my head
and I should be treated like one
instead of being treated like a degenerate
When we are done
She walks out with her head held high
secure in the knowledge that we will walk out
with our eyes downcast
through the back doors and dirty alley
to the hospital cafeteria doors by the dumpsters
and parade past everyone who knows where we came from
we can't escape the dread of going back to That Room
To suffer the humiliation again

"But I am a patient" I scream in my head
and I should be treated like one
instead of being treated like a degenerate
I'm sick and miserable
and need to be taken care of
with gentleness and respect
but this is a stop on the way to Hell
because They believe that's where I belong
They don't believe in this disease
They hate what I am 
and laugh at me behind my back
because it's all my fault that I'm here
To Them, I'm a joke
but in reality
I am a patient


Details | Free verse | |

Light as a Feather

She sashays, skipping down the stairs,
her hair drifting thin and soft around her ears,
feet barely brushing the steps.
Her skirt swirls about her knees like cotton candy.
The dress she wears matches her fuzzy eyelashes:
brown and soft, like sparrows.
When she passes over the threshold 
of inside to out, she sails off into
the sky, praying for the right breeze
to carry her back to Earth.


Details | Free verse | |

I Love You

I love you,
may God and his Son give you the peace you need.
I love you,
may you find tranquility in the Pure Lands with all the Buddhas and Bodhisattva's.
I love you,
may you find happiness in your friends and family.
I love you,
may a single tear that rolls down my cheek washes away all of your pain and fears.
I love you,
may our time together always be bright sunny days.


Details | Free verse | |

Thorn Within

There's a thorn within me
Piercing my chest when I breathe
Stabbing my ribs when I laugh
Causing me pain when I work

It's a sinister thorn
I've had it all through my life
It beats every day to keep me alive
But the thorn within is killing me now

Even when I'm still
It palpitates in a frenzy
Short of breath, I stop to recover
The thorn within laughs

I'd beg it to stop
But I'd die along with it
Laughing as it kills me
The thorn within beats out its rhythm


Details | Free verse | |

Anxiety

Heart racing Palms sweaty Worry defeats me As I Stare at the ceiling Normality, a distant dream Feel as if I am losing my mind I am not exactly sure why Questions begin to haunt my brain Is it my heart? Is it all in my head? Why do I feel this way? Why am I scared? Panic takes over I am alone Powerless to struggle Heart racing Palms Sweaty Worry defeats me As I stare at the ceiling Normality, a distant dream


Details | Free verse | |

Tina's Night

Beltran ,the artist, has seen Christina,
seen her crawling form, statuary still,
in the field of grass
inching only in the minds eye.
He has wondered, as did Wyeth
what might she have been
been before the polio took her lower limbs
when she could stand and walk upright.

Beltran's nymph Christina 'light' in sailor pink
sleeveless and fragile stands stalwart
and considers the blacken air, the
skeletal house the ghost lights in the sky.
No forward motion can we spy 
and action lays behind her 
her arms and wrists crossed.
And though the rows invite cajole
the Little Tina toward the night
we see she's having none of it
a tornado comes this night.

*Please See About the Poem for Andrew Wyth's Christina's World


Details | Free verse | |

' To Be Holy-Clean ... '

I Bathed My Body
Perfumed My Soul
Body and Soul – All Aglow

I Washed My Mind
Prepared My Heart
Made Grime and Crime Depart

 … I’m As Pure, As An Impure-Girl Can Be
I’m Clean, As Far As The Eye Can See
But I’m Stuck, In The Soil Of Humanity
And You Said, What’s Yours, Must Be Holy …

I’ve Swept Away Dirty
Dust, Won’t Settle On Me
Mopped and Polished My Humility 

 No (Lye)-Soap, But Suds 
I, Tin-Washboard-Rubbed
My Sins, Clorox-Soaked and Scrubbed

 … Tonight, It’s Time For Another Bath
Smog, Plus Fog-Sweat, Well … Do The Math
Daily, My Fault, Ain’t Far From My Path
Tub-Baptized, ‘Cause Stink, Only Raises Wrath …

I, Talcum-Powder, Self-Inflicted-Bruises
Massage Away, Comfort-Zone-Excuses
and Rest On Silk Sheets:  No Abuses, Nor Wild-Deuces …

 Lotion On Sand-Grain, Pained-Shoulder
Put Soothing Aloe-Oil, Yet Stain Spilt-Over 
 ‘ Son Of Man ’, Came and Used Stain-Remover

… My Window-Sights, Clear For Clarity
My Hair and Hands, Shining-Sanitary-Vanity) 
When Vacuumed, I’m Spotless, Not Bare-Empty
I’m Hygienic, Jasmine-Scented, Please Remain In Me

I’m As Pure, As An Impure-Girl Can Be
I’m Clean, As Far As The Eye Can See
But I’m Stuck, In The Soil Of Humanity
(My Spirit Is Willing … But My Flesh Is Weak)
And You Said, What’s Yours, Must Be Holy …


Details | Free verse | |

Lost Life

A single heartbeat,
unappreciated,
A breath of air,
Unrecognized,
Promised, is nothing but,
Life and Death,
With time constraints,
Cherish the ability to Cherish,
Time,
Love,
Life.
I pray for you to pray,
Death barges in without a knock,
No lock and protect you,
Security within yourself,
faith,
Guarding your soul,
The only thing you can prevent,
Is prevention,
Accept rather than object,
Dont reject or forget,
Because everyone is subject,
To what you go through,
Remember,
Not to Forget,
But to remember.


Details | Free verse | |

Progression

Pain
 
intense, continual
 
frightening, maddening, depressing, crushing
 
pills, needles, doctors, prayers
 
easier, bearable
 
Relief


Details | Free verse | |

palliative care

who knows why
we are drawn
to the dark places
in people's lives

my daughter said
she wouldn't want
that grief and 
death stuff all day

inching in
holding hands
wouldn't you

do something
differently if
you had more time

maybe there
was a talk
or not a very
good one about it

we wonder if
we should have
done more

psychosocial comfort
sensitive improved
continuity of care

there is no cure
so we focus on
higher quality

life affirming
in the midst of
life limiting

not hospice. they
have more than
just six months

left usually and
we just thought
there should be

a structure of care
set up for this
kind of thing

Feb. 22, 2009 - 1:18 AM


Details | Free verse | |

Chews To Keep You Away

Chews To Keep You Away
	
Each taste sends you
farther away from me,
that's where I want you to be.
 
Every calorie takes 
your hands to another face,

           far from my body, 
                           
                         my private parts.

                                               my space.
 
Piles of crumbs 
keep you from rubbing on me,
like you did on the bathroom tile 
when I was just a child.
 
Bring on the food!
 


Details | Free verse | |

ENNUI OF THE LOST

Ennui conspires insipid moods
infringing human awareness,
ruled by a lunatic vision,
not controlled by insight and lucidity;
and desires of a Dolce Vita
mollify a false illusion
to appear on an intaglio, to gradually
become a shining insignia.


To steer a ship, takes effort and patience,
and if its course is guided by favorable winds,
all is well for the adventurous captain;
and should he lose focus, lured by lunacy and nihilism,
his enthusiasm wears out and failure sets in...
and his ship will lurch on unfriendly waves,
and his ennui lessens courage to deviate
from the safe route when nocturnal vision is lost indeed.


Ennui insinuates myopia,
muzzling the voice and halting 
the mind's performance,
thus forging the promise of  utopia; 
and the hunch is to pursue intuition
whenever it may lead...being
the holster controlling the steed,
getting rid of the humdrum and huff,
humming and ignoring the hourglass,
which trickles sand to infuse fear.
    


Details | Free verse | |

My Testy Ride

 
My Testy Ride

Loading into the back seat of a 
Grand AM with three of my cousins, 
belted in for a 3 hour joy ride.

Sitting behind my cousin with 
his chair leaning far back, 
I’m surrounded on all sides.

My head starts to spin; 
I’m losing my mind, 
if I stay back here 
my planets will collide.

Six Flags was going to be fun, 
but it will have to be fun 
without me because 
I’m out of this ride!

My sweet sister-in-law 
relinquishes her front seat for me, 
saving my face by being very kind.

I’m glad I spoke up 
and admitted my fear; 
sometimes it pays to 
show our vulnerable side.

That day I learned to 
open up and share my truth; 
revealing my weakness, 
instead of trying to hide.

We all have fears, 
that day we all learned 
that in each other 
we could always confide.


Details | Free verse | |

Nuclear winter

Images burned into my head too unbearable to manage 
and control to lead a normal life
 without consequence.

Life maintained through pills and counseling
 with guidance on this long and unkind path of my existence.

These thoughts to intrusive and invade the
 mind without warning causing a battle within like the axis to the allies of 
Europe’s great war.

Happiness to sad with smiles so false, the eyes, 
the only passage to truth found deep within the catacombs of the soul are sought.

Memories established in these catacombs clutching my soul bearing down upon 
me leaving me breathless with the will to live out of reach of embracing.

An ongoing battle, day to day, incompliant within my mind is this unseen enemy 
that is the silent killer of millions.

This assassin overwhelmed and crushed the innocent victims damned to spend 
eternity in their own mental nuclear winter.

My personal hell.


Details | Free verse | |

my vice

On my search for something new
I discovered life's untrue
a memory download, a filecabbnet
we are information weals and getting harder to withstand it
so many humans blinded to this day
none of them see it my insighted way
I've seen the answers, I've spoken to the ones
we fill this life with jokes and puns
our memories save the puzzle peices we have found
I name my storage Wiskazzor but most just throw theirs on the ground
a conscience and a fortune teller
people mostly tend to kill her
I dont sleep at night, insomnia's a death wish
but now that i have found my vice life is quite a sinch


Details | Free verse | |

Earl Grey

Groggy, in need I arise,
Not bothering to wipe the sleep from my eyes,
Another sleepless night 
as my legs wiggle, and torture me from the inside.

What remedy this time will I try?
I'm not certain, 
it seems everything once has been tried.
So back to the same old, same old, I go -
my Earl Grey.

The cupboard door scrapes open,
Blindly I reach my hand inside,
find the container - find the tea, then
Swing open the small cupboard by the sink,
Grab the tallest mug, water, tear open the pouch, 
And inhale.

Pause - 
Part of my routine,
Inhale the powerful aroma of 
my Earl Grey tea. 

Toss the bag it lands to float on the water
in my large mug, 
Then two minutes in the microwave,
Add the French Vanilla, and I am ready for my buzz.

Ah, here we are, 
I sit on the spare room bed,
Lift my mug and inhale again,
let the flavor fill my head,
and sip, hot, steaming, burning
yet, healing liquid, 
I am hoping it
will relax and return me to my bed.

(c) Lisa Jensen-Lewis 2013


Details | Free verse | |

Pill

I’m anxious for my test tomorrow
Even though I tell myself in ten years I wont remember my grade 
I still cant sleep
I take the pill 
Wash it down and I find a sick comfort in knowing soon…soon I will find sleep
The elusive love of my life whose tempting ways creep up at all the wrong times
I don’t want you during class or on a date
I want you at night in my bed.
I want you to come more regularly than the fire alarms in Hamlin hall
I start to feel the release of my body as the pill courses through my veins filling my
capillary beds
I feel warm
I love it
I know i could roll over, but i dont care, I just lay here and it’ll all go away
The pain of the day wont even become a memory
The fear of tomorrow wont be a reality for a couple more hours
My friends say meditate or do yoga, but it doesn’t feel as good as this 
Knowing that I wont remember a thing or hear an alarm
Knowing I wont care to wake up
It is through this I find joy and peace…
It is through this I find control


Details | Free verse | |

The Golden Years

Shoulder to shoulder
Grandfathers move slowly
Down the hall of assisted living,
Clinging to walkers
That roll on the carpet,
Laughing and telling secrets.

An old John Wayne movie 
Is showing tonight
As the men become youngsters
Playing cowboys and Indians or
Bold handsome sheriff
Disarming masked bandits
As horses raise dust
And guns explode.

The Alzheimer patient has left his room
Grasping for memories of the 
Bands he played in
While boring his grandchildren,
The rock generation;
He sings off key and smiles at an audience
That only lives on in his mind.


Details | Free verse | |

Power

Awe is a power unto itself
By its very nature transforms us
The best part is it is free, natural
Continually available

Question:
Am I willing to awaken to awe?

This is not original.  I do not know the author.  I would like anyone who is willing to try to 
find as many awe inspiring moments as possible in each day.  Look for the unsual. Jot down 
what is awesome to you and share with us here at soup.

Sara


Details | Free verse | |

Souls in search

I truly feel for all these souls that enter this door
seeking relief from their pain
be it psychic pain
or physical

they are in search of healing
some from the inside out
and some from the outside in
sometimes both

I wish there was something I could do
other than offer my ear to hear their stories
or offer a smile to lift them up
I could have studied to be a doctor
welding instruments to aid me in my craft
instead I am a receptionist
a greeter of the crowd
one who speaks softly
not at all loud

I truly feel for the people who come in through this door
some asking for nothing and others looking for so much more
medication or a counsellor for their pain
and I remain here
as they come in
answering questions to determine the shape they are in....


Details | Free verse | |

Mesmerized....repost

Sit quiet; look deep into my eyes,
Find my center and drown yourself there.
Slowly let go..let your channels run free..
Look deep; let me have your power.

I am with you; I am holding your hands,
Let your dark pain flow to me..
This magnetism, locks our eyes firmly..
I invade you and let you live freely again.




This is based on the work of Anton Mesmer
A German physician who lived 1724-1815
His early work  led to the  development of 
Hypnotism by J Braid later in the 1840's

reposted for my assignment...Hypnotism


Details | Free verse | |

GOV

They sell us lies,
Feed us death,
Shows us lives,
That we cannot get,
Mock our style,
But help us dress,
To promote control,
And slowly compress,
Our creative minds,
That stays depressed,
Possessed,
By the grotesque,
Rapist,
We call our government,
Stealing our souls,
For the fun of it,
Killing us off,
While we transmit,
Man-made viruses,
To countries,
That we consider shit,
While we commit,
Mass murder,
On the mass media,
That promotes censorship,
Blind to the fact,
That we caused all of this,
Blind to the fact,
That our freedom of speech,
Is as useless as a deaf,
Dumb,
And Blind,
65,
Year old mistress,
That thinks Jesus was a narcissist.


Details | Free verse | |

Dreamlight

He is a dreamlight,
Sacred and strong,
Coincidently with me,
Loving and strong,
He and I fly like two blue jays,
Then perched on a spruce branch,
He is my morning and my night,
My beginning and my finish,
I find him in my dreams,
Also with good memories,
Will he and I meet again,
Destiny complex and religious,
God guides and the mystery continues,
He is a miracle of the future.
I pray that he is from God's kingdom.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

For I am

FOR I AM AN ADDICT.
Addicted to addiction,
Control over nothing but torment,
Face myself,
Before I can face others…
FOR I AM AN ADDICT.
Addicted to the present,
Ignoring the past,
Neglecting the future,
Unaware of the dangers ahead,
I shake hands with death,
FOR I AM AN ADDICT.
With new found glory,
Blessed to be,
Me, myself, and I,
Surrounded by others like I,
Myself and me!
FOR I AM AN ADDICT.
Recovering form the past,
Thanking God for the present,
And praying for the future,
Faith drives me,
With God’s cruise control,
I never underestimate,
The power of my addiction,
The power to return…
FOR I AM STILL AN ADDICT.
                                                                                                                   FRESH WRITTEN


Details | Free verse | |

Raised Shore

Deep breath in slowly let it out
Don’t forget the ten count
Nausea begins to rise
From some depth unrecognized

Churning into anger 
Blatantly right before my eyes
This deceit has no problem being spied
No longer can I hide

Seeping out of control
Is the mind I use to own
Tepidly tells the lie
Truly have I been so blind

Realization is so forlorn
As the reborn tail tells the map
To leave behind such an after math
Of the less fortunate triggered decisions

Oh so trapped 
Snapped, Cracked
Lacking the ability to freeze frame

What is not mine in shame
Just mine to blame
Competing for

Raised Shore


Details | Free verse | |

Multi-dimensional Love

You can only visit, you can't stay,
A blessing from God,
Comes in the shape of triangles and sguares,
Maybe someone you met at church,
Nature appears and the love stays,
Self-controlled and smart,
The ability for man and woman to marry again,
God complex and fulfilling,
My thesaurus rhymes with thoughts,
That are many and diversified,
University a distant goal.


Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

I am prey

Daylight stalks its poised victim
under the milky retina of morn
My eyes close tightly yet not in slumber
I bask
somewhere between the pleasure and pain
 that only the hunted know.
While my hunter gains ground an inch at a time,
slithering between finger
branches of serpent hues
in hypnotic dance between gold and shade;
I long to sway to its rhythm.
Sunshine cautiously drapes every leaf and blade
creeping ever closer to my shadowy refuge
it bides its time
waiting to strike
and I eagerly await its coiled sting.


Details | Free verse | |

A Leaf

Winters blow
until the last
until the rain
doesn't pass
and when the wind
blows softly in
it does not move
to welcome in
the joy, the wind
the words, the wind
then you will have
no suffering


Details | Free verse | |

The Walker

No matter the weather
every day she passes
with knees slightly bent,
hands gnarled and clenched at her sides
moving down the sidewalk.

Chin jutting forward,
her back becomes a c-curve
beneath a fine hatted-head.

Always she wears a hat ...
of knit in the winter with
a scarf from yarn to match,
or maybe, nothing matches.

In the spring, the hat 
is from a fisherman
and on another day,
its a jaunty baseball cap.

Strong will etches her face
holding her mouth in determination
to reach the end of the street,
then turn around and walk back again
with cheeks rosier and
beautiful wrinkling eyes raised to heaven.

Its the Joy of her day
this little sashay to the corner
then home up the block
as her strong heart beats,
pulsing with gratitude for
one more walk.


Details | Free verse | |

DRINK EVER AGAIN

O, please forgive me, honey
I behaved like a damned fool at your sister-in-law’s house
Last night drinking like a bull
O, please, please, please, honey
You got to forgive me once more time
I do promise you I won’t do it again
I was a fool by making such a show of jealousy because of that past
Lover be there with all entries and gangs of his

O, babe, babe, babe, babe!
I am not going to drink ever again just tell me you’re still loving me
As yesterday as before and when it done consistently attached
You would say it loud: I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!
I was afraid to lose you again with so much drinks and rages
In front of this past lover showing himself up like a damned king
And driving that heavenly Mercedes-Benz!

I was telling you now it was anxiety and depression and predisposition to adult
Alcoholism with difficulty developing my identical love and passion and therefore
I am so sorry, and please, o, My Little Bee! You ought to forgive me this time
As many times we have done it before!

I lost my mind again
O, tell me before I kneel in front of you just as those drastic tears start falling
From me that you are still loving more than ever

I swear for Jesus I won’t drink ever again
I would go to the Church with you again and again and  again and again,
but I’d send flowers to your sister-in-law in Florida as a way to confirm you 
I have changed I am not going to drink ever again for God’s sake
You would see, o, honey, your papito  has changed; you got to believe me
O, please, babe, forgive me!
O, forgive me!  I yell you again
O, God don’t let me down; so God gives me strength not to kiss a bottle ever again
And don't let me to scream like a fool

O, baby, Sweet Baby! O, My  Sweet Totorri! Your man has changed
O, please, My Pumpkin Pie, kiss me and let me in because your papito feels cold
Outside in this unfriendly porch and the moonlight is full and pregnant
I told you I was a fool and I tell you now forgive me, honey 
This man, your man, is telling you the truth this damned fool
Really has changed!


Details | Free verse | |

Reprieve

Settle in my dear
Don't wrestle no more
The blood is sustaining
What is life for
No need to fight this one
Just take a rest
bask in the sun
Outside you'll see 
There's more to be
So you have tired feet
and crumpled hands
can only good happen
to those who give a damn
come sit and breathe
for all of your trials
and sufferings
will one day be brought to their
reckoning....
please stay, discover your
much waited glorious reprieve


Details | Free verse | |

Drugs

It started once in chocolate,
It ended up in coke,
It found its way in music pangs,
Like vipers deadly fangs…
This poison spread like fire,
Throughout each state and home,
Now that it’s an epidemic,
To legalize they’re prone.
It started in candy,
Then ended-up in schools;
It spread when they thought the Bible...
"Was not-a-good Golden-rule...!”
It started in the homes,
When kids had nowhere to play;
It took its toll and boomeranged-,
Back on our heads to stay…!
Now it’s in our churches,
For each old aged-gran;
‘Cause Steroids aren’t just for boxers,
It’s for everyone across the land.
It seems the government has the market,
For every cause and lure; 
Oh yea, drugs are really big business,
Or they would have found a cure! 
 


Details | Free verse | |

A Discovery

Throughout the lands and the seven seas,
humanity has been ravaged by all kinds of disease.
These illnesses are both debilitating and deadly.
They are caused by small agents we cannot see.

I am among the crusaders who have never given up hope.
I have spent countless hours gazing through a microscope.
Illnesses are perpetrated by viruses and bacteria.
The pathogenic numbers amount to a plethora.

I have a bacterial culture inside this Petri dish.
However, a factor has worked against my wish.
What I see has been ravaged by mold contamination.
Wait a minute.  This deserves closer examination.
Around the mycoses blooms, no bacteria grow near.
Areas circling the mold are completely clear.
I will further investigate to see what I can find.
Perhaps something here will help humankind.


Details | Free verse | |

Natural or Is It

Natural drug if not tampered with by human kind.
No worse or better for any human then any other.
Some will say that it is safe and better then most.
I say it depends on the user, just like other drugs.

Just like alcohol some can handle, some cannot.
It alters the mind and numbs the physical.
There are no side effects, some do say. Today,
Through personal experience, I know different.

Using marijuana for medical needs may suffice.
This proves that it is a drug, yes truly indeed.
However, the medicinal drug has been changed.
From its natural state, to make it so effective,

Though I also know, the day will come soon.
That it will be legalized, and sold like liquor.
With the same limits and chosen, buzz limit.
In addition, some will abuse it, like alcohol addiction.

I have seen many of my schoolmates become lost.
No room for tiny thoughts, loss of daily time,
Not able to be rational, for even simple tasks,
Lost in a whirlwind of days of no knowledge,

You might be laughing, saying I am crazy.
If nothing else, usage will make you lazy.


Details | Free verse | |

Nurse Roma

The patient’s condition I do not care
Any medical condition does not scare
I will only do what I see fit
I will tell you when and where to sit

In this clinic I am always the boss
What you think I give not a toss
Although you might be very ill
All those forms you have to fill

She can drive your pressure way up high
And dismiss your tests with just a sigh
She know just looking I am very ill
But for hours I must wait for the magic pill

Nurse Roma Rude makes no idle boast
When stating that she can upset the most
The proud possessor of a medical skill
Can more than lightly a patient kill



Details | Free verse | |

Out On The Porch (1)

Rain came down last night
With it rolled the thunder and flashed the lightning
Now  the air is so clean, crisp, and cool
Crickets abound singing praises
While the rooster's strength is renewed
Birds chirp with loving calls, for God has met their needs
The earth sparkles with beauty from the cleansing bath
Breezes gently carry appreciating tunes around
Bamboo wind chimes gently give their hollow sound
Calling, calming, relaxing;
Breeze gently strokes my face
Securing my relaxation
For my attitude determines the musical tone of my home
Totally cloudy this morn but could clear
Responsibilities pull me away but I can't go just yet
Need to stay on the porch for a while and commune with God


Details | Free verse | |

Lanterns-or, Addiction's Self Portrait

A paper lantern of a girl;
Dim halo hazy, stitched thin by needlework.
A precision seamstress of darker dreams--
Freedom is a luxury, not
A privilege.




"Lanterns"
Jenna-Nichole Conrad
Wordsmith



Details | Free verse | |

Guilty Gear

It's like death but sweeter
It's freezing by the heater
It's narcissism, fanaticism,
And folly on a cake

It's like steel but tougher
I've got acid but no buffer
It's cynicism, pessimism,
And idiocy in a shake

It's like mucus but putrid
It's milk and booze diluted
It's nihilism, optimism,
And ignorance in a pie

It's like sugar but sour
It's drowning in the shower
It's like having happiness and sorrow
Impaled into your eyes


Details | Free verse | |

Sweet Pancakes (Epulaeryu)

Maple syrup on the top
Hash browns on the side
Scrambled eggs with peppers too
Sweet pancakes for you
They’ll taste delicious
With cold milk
Wow!




The “Epulaeryu” consists of seven lines with thirty-three (33) syllables.   The first 
line has seven (7) syllables, the second line five (5), the third line seven (7), the 
fourth line five (5), the fifth line five (5), the sixth line three (3), and the seventh line 
has only one (1) syllable which ends with an exclamation mark.  It’s all about 
delicious food. The Epulaeryu poem was developed by Joseph Spence after 
enjoying many delicious and nourishing international cuisine and drinks during 
his most memorable travels.


Details | Free verse | |

Disorder

Anxiety of worries
stresses in life
emotional fears
rigid in perception
patterns unbroken
frozen in movement
from opportunities passed.

Avoiding of participation
sitting on the sidelines
watching in slow motion
the fear of dying
hearts racing fast
in much anticipation
reclusive and isolated
from the world
passing you by
trapped in a prison
that is no lie
immobilized I cry.


Details | Free verse | |

The Aging Prophetess

February 5, 2014

His words echo through the mouthpiece.
His voice squeaks like a tot,
but she knows he’s a robust young man.
Isn’t he? 
Is she confused again?
What day is it? What time? What day again?
Bodies move in slow motion.
They did not used to be that way.
Things were different,
More beautiful, spun on the loom,
and quilted with indifference.
That’s why it’s better now,
Or is she peering into the future again?
She gets so confused.


Details | Free verse | |

This is the day that the Lord has made

Morning lights on my leaden eyes
And on my body still weighted in sleep
Fuzzy thoughts try to creep into my mind   
I try to move not sure if I really want to wake
I check the time on my mobile
That is beside my mattress on the floor  
(Even though this bed is not quite ideal I reflect
At least I have a roof over me and I am safe)
My body clock and nature’s demands 
Say I  must rise 
In this I have no option
I roll over holding my sore back 
I will my legs to move
I shuffle slowly at first 
It helps my circulation 
The heaviness dissipates 
I start to move less painfully
The warm summers day looks on me with lacksadaisy eyes
My body responds like a dull knife that is not able to cut anything
I need a sharpening tool
They say ‘Iron sharpens iron’
I need this if I am going to make this day cut with any precision
Painlessly, cleanly and with heightened sharpened wit
I look to the Rock that is higher than I
My heart is quickened within as I acknowledge His spirit in me
I am not alone for the sword of His word brings me light and joy
His presence in me brings me peace  
And soon that which is corruptible will be swallowed up into eternal day
‘This is the day that the Lord has made’ I will rejoice in it
For YOU have made me Glad!

© Brenda V Northeast         3 Jan. 2012



Details | Free verse | |

Spring holiday fever

Daffodils bunch, spring has sprung,
Sun raises higher to waken sleepy heads;
No time for hibernation now as spring fever hits, - 
create time to get together; go fly a kite, 
or sit and chill, make daisy chains.

Let the sunshine bring warm sunny days.
In meadows baby lambs take their first steps;
whilst mad March hare hops and plays
with baby bunnies dotting the green fields 
of the countryside.

A season where everything wants to bloom,
time to trim those lawns and weed again;
and all just in time before spring rains
will once more aid those thirsty 
flowers and bulbs as they grow.

For it is now that gorgeous butterflies 
flutter gracefully by giving nature a helping hand;
pollinating the kingdom while watching little chicks -
crack open their Easter eggs, just in time
to join in the madness of this happy holiday season.


Details | Free verse | |

Brown

I know you are here.
I can feel you,
In the tips of my fingers when I pass through the path
Broken now by soldiers of summer that once swished strong bayonet’s
Fighting a cold war before resting on the icy ground
For I am blind to you,
I can’t see you
Blighted with my fathers curse to confuse you with others

But I know you are here.
I can taste you,
In the chestnuts that swarm in the heat of the marketplace
A buzzing of warmth from a natural source
A bubbling coffee to heat tired eyes
Yes, I am blind 
But not as you think
Colour blind 
This doesn’t mean I let you fall from my sight.


Details | Free verse | |

Fault

They ask me how ill
I try to reply, but the words
Sick enough to die
In my head I wonder, when the time is
Scared enough to cry

They ask me to go
I wish to say, I can’t express
I want to be here today
Watch me please, take care 
Don’t send me away

They tell me to hang
Do what you’re told, but the query
I want to grow old
Waiting for the day, it’s time
Don’t watch me grow cold

They say it’s ok
You will survive, but the darkness
Is pulling me in inside
At this instant, I see beyond
See the light, but I am still alive

They say a burden, I wasn’t
I want to give thanks, but I can’t
Too weak, I sank
You worked so hard, sacrificing it was
I should have just walked the plank

They say deteriorate, problem solved
What did I do? I didn’t mean
To cause harm to you
You say not me, not my fault
It’s just a thing, not an assault

They say a sacrifice, will be repaid
When will you get yours, it’s a bit delayed
You’re still suffering, over time
It’s gotten worse, just a crime
One so good, it isn’t fair

They say endure, with love in the air
I am the guilt beyond shame
Put you through, unselfish game
No win here, a grateful heart
Significance for me is all you see

They say the good, hasn’t much time
I’m thankful you’re here
My everything, even more than I knew
And I want to say, and I will 
I love you


Details | Free verse | |

Excused

A quiet man,
a good man.
An exquisite  artist
in 
watercolor.
Self taught.

As a sailor,
he was excused
from chipping paint, 
swabbing decks,
or peeling spuds
by lighting up
when the Chief Boatswain
barked to his crew
“smoke 'em if you got 'em.”

Excused, 
he put down his mop  
his paint brush, or his knife,
and smoked.

Today, thirty years
later, he is dying.

He is breathing through a tube
in his throat
and laying in his bed
at home
waiting,
watching his last
football games
and waiting.


Details | Free verse | |

Muriel

she planted seeds
pulled weeds
grew trees
and was into topiary;

then something grew inside her,
a weed that would not be pulled

the grass grew thick
and everywhere
the crabs thrived
the orchids flourished
and as she was going
the greater they grew
one day she stepped out there
and wilted in the shade
of a giant green flamingo

sometimes i think of her
when it’s hot
pouring pink lemonade.


Details | Free verse | |

Don't let it slip away

Stripped, abused and tortured.
Help me, my life's but one -
Don't let it slip away!




Authors notes

Enforcing a picture and or meaning in 15 words.


Details | Free verse | |

Curiosity

Through just-parted lips I blow, deliberate and slow
A fine silver smoke rises, I watch it go
A gorgeous heaven-bound stream; I'm left below
To dream of steam trains in the sky

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch one dragging chemicals
Out of a thin paper wand; years of life and health she sells
For this finger-long vice, but this I must tell
When it's this cold outside, I get curious

What hazy distraction does the cigarette evoke?
You breathe in, then pause.  Do you hold in the smoke
Because it's warming your lungs?  I'm certain I'd choke.
Yet I wonder if it feels like fire inside


Details | Free verse | |

Alone in the Journey

I am a loner,
Pressing forward,
None will understand,
I will have to stand,
While all say ‘break’,
My minds says ‘No’,
Every minute spent,
In the texts,
My life will consist,
Of only this,
I am prepared,
Never scared,
You must see,
I believe in me,
I will make it,
Up north,
Success is in my grasp,
If I ignore the asp,
I will have my day;
Someday.


Details | Free verse | |

Bigger

Life is short
But this time
It was bigger
They all tried so hard
To forget her
The rumors spread
That she was dead
She didn't blame them
They didn't know
It hurt the teacher
Hearing what they all said
The maddness
They could not stop
Nor the rumors
She lived her life
The way she thought
God had sought

Cancer.

it was painful
No kem
No radiation
Abuse.
She was rasied with it
Abuse only mad the
Cancer hurt worse
The halls
The looks
The pain
It crowded her thoughts
As a senior she was
Determined to graduate
Still going to school
She refused to not go
A week before graduation
It happened suddenly
Walking in those halls
Getting those looks
The pain worsened
She got paranoid
Down she went
Laying there in pain
Watched the world
Around her fade to black.


Details | Free verse | |

Sleep Deprivation

I've been awake for hours,
and all through the night,
I could not imagine morning,
the day as it turned out to be,
so hard to grasp, in truth, lies,
imagination, the copied moments 
seemed so real... like life, with men
walking down the subway platform,
shivering like ghosts, 
in formulaic pale, 
whizzing transparent
as a dream escaping into reality,
and what can you really do? In delirium, 
but keep writing, living, as seaweed
suspended in water like hair flowing
out
of liquid bedroom walls... this can't be
right, but left of me there's nothing,
save a voice that echoes on either side
of my head, signaling stereo brain damage
to my muse, who in turn tells me to keep 
writing, because it's an opportunity
to let some new experience expose
in the light of day, like an untouched
photograph of a man you met once at a bar,
and God..
he had the craziest stories-
like this one time, the fool didn't sleep for a hundred hours,
because he felt like he was wasting his time,
and so he invested it, and lost everything
in a gambling match with his health, 
wound up ten days later with no recollection
of enlightenment, hopped up on Thorazine
and broker than a camel, sleeping on straw
coloured hair, recounting everything
in fragmented
sections,
from the broad side of a pillow,
with love, and a fragile psyche, 
but he's psycho, and sees text
as background to fantasy, passing
out...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I litterally passed out after writing this, this is the now edited version.


Details | Free verse | |

Wishing You The Very Best

Three wishes
Illuminating dishes


First one
  No gun


Communication is the key


Second asking
   Sun's basking


For no light World would be cold lonely and dark


Third request
  Loves zest

After all it's what makes the world go around


Details | Free verse | |

Burns and Blood

She lays in a hospital bed
As a nurse changes her bloody rags.
On those rags is the young girls burned skin
And boiled blood.
The nurse stumbles back because of the smell
Horrified by odor the nurse leaves the room.
The little girl lays their still breathing
Cords under her skin to keep her alive.
Burned form head to toe 
By the church 
Accused of being a witch
Her skin black like volcanic ash
a white plastic wall surrounds her to keep stuff from touching her.
Another nurse walks in the room
Just to see what is inside the plastic wall
As the nurse looks at the young girl
Who has been scared sad and alone.
For a long time.
The little girl looked back at the nurse.
She hurt her by just looking at the nurses eyes the windows to the soul.
The nurse ran out scared fearful of the girl
The little girl looked back up
A dark figure loomed towards the little girls plastic wall
Putting its hand on it promising they will pay for what they have done.
The little girl raised her hand to the figures and touched it.
Vein like cords spread around the plastic walls turning it black
The hole hospital turned to a rusted nightmare.


Details | Free verse | |

Mona Lisa Mother's Day

God's blessings for mothers,
To have their relatives and loved ones near,
The blue sky and the beautiful trees,
The sound of songbirds singing their song,
Friends that keep us company,
The miracles that guide us everyday,
A quiet day of thankfulness,
Many beautiful memories through the years,
Guided by God and the ten commandments.
The miracle of education that enhances our lives.
A church that is harmonious and forever.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Give me the will

Childhood obesity is a disease
Where is the cure?
Is it in you
Or will you just ignore it and let the nation face its doom
Big, Big Big
Unhealthy, strive for success
Starting with a healthy self
Don’t be afraid to put the junk back on the shelf
Where is the will? 
Where is the way?
Will I be fat if I eat one doughnut today?
Mom , Dad what do you say?
Give me some cream, and I’ll wont fade away
You lost motivation, I’ve gained a little weight
If you continue to feed me like this
I wont be in a good state
Instill the will, Instill the Way so that I may start off with a healthy slate.


Details | Free verse | |

Our thoughts are with you...

In sickness and in health
you vowed to one another,
and now when things are tough
you stand strong for each other.

There’s nothing wrong with taking time
to persue own dreams and goals,
at least you know when to break away
and listen to your soul!

We want to wish you peacefulness,
good health and luck in life,
to thank you for all you do for us
through all your tears and strife.

To let you know you’re thought of
in oh so many ways
Take time you need it’s precious
and you’re in prayers every day!

May you both find the strength and peace you need through one another. Friends are with 
you and understand such hard times…


Details | Free verse | |

Village of Bad Water

hundreds of my pictures on his wall
take the dog for a walk
change my clothes
flashin my eyes as i come back out

the last child that lived here
locked in a room never allowed to go out
no thanksgiving supper

Set up again
by people pretending to be friends
no false pretenses
hidden agenda of a neighbor
lieing to my face again

insanity in my headphones
the nightmare of the cable box
the charade of sex is just lemonaid
and i now know desperation 

how should i feel?
when you do this to me
the rumors and misunderstandings of such confusion you manipulate
and i learn to translate

kicked out of my deathbed
wake up and be on your way
your last dance finaly taking place
the days of cliches
the protest i dont belong to
so you can say what you want to say
i'd rather die then let you control me for one more day

the world a trap you cant get out of
everybody dies and god is the hero
and this is how you get real paid
selling me the next lie to live
everyday i play this game
listening intently
to find my way out of your corner again
going forward in reverse

Usual suspects
the same faces again
you didn't learn anything
nothing at all
usual suspects
same old crime
easier to do it the second time
after you practice on the life i will be cornered to live
absolute control you seek after
manipulation of fear for laughter
endless chapters
of death with no bedside manner
cowering behind your alibi
cowering behind your alibi
such a twisted face
behind your mask

all the right questions
they never asked
let me tell you about a village
everyone there for their own reasons
two sides of every contradiction
offer you a decision
two choices for one to choose
cornered again
backing out, both roads always a choice of two evils
no path of least resistance
we can do this the hard way
hurting you more than you meant to
cowards acting like little boys
the stage is set for your message
the stage is set for you to see
whose walking behind me
living everything i fix
the shadow of tomorrow
what they do not have to go through anymore
my stalker of this life
always a step behind me
always there to take the blessings ive been denied
in front of me is you
in front of me
i see whats behind me

Hindsighting the hunter
foreshadowing the wolf
hindsight of the hunter
foreshadowing the wolf
as blind as i am
as lost as seem
far behind me is you with the life i leave
jealous of what i lost again
taken away


Details | Free verse | |

Perfect Garden

I would like to create a perfect garden,
Where God blesses you with planting 
And reaping your own foods,
A place where you can plant juicy tomatoe plants,
Maybe potatoe plants grow,
Broccoli which simply mushrooms into a green floret,
Lettuce a leafy light green,
Cauliflower which is a beautiful white ,
Peas and carrots compliment a soup,
Green grapes ever so delicious,
Red radishes good with sandwiches,
Onions the perls of summer picnics,
Rhubarb for pies and desserts,
A selection of good foods from God's kingdom.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Nature enshrines the waves of sleep

Sidestepping the shadows and agony
 
A trance spelled vision offered
 
What body-broken progressions lost:
 
A miniature emblem in the holographic light
 
Healing minds belabored with aggression
 
 
 
For a second, all subjects grieved
 
Casting doubt on veracity of pen movement
 
A storied skull to soul-bone rumination
 
Yet the decadence of words unearthed
 
 
 
A new perspective from modern-day recycling
 
Lost in trance, the ritual gothic tragedy
 
I could sense the eyeballs truncated
 
Against walls of dastardly meat
 
 
 
Human beings in a monstrous shredder
 
Capital investments cold as day, threatening
 
To rip song from hearts of mercy, then
 
 
 
Somehow gathering strength to run, I
 
Could see the glowing beauty of shadowed climbs
 
How the sky will shape into earth
 
How every birth would carry meaning
 
 
 
So as potent sacs of fluid
 
Vomited their lungs into space
 
Its an ancient purging 
 
To put limbs to ease
 
Instead of resurrecting hidden tension
 
 
 
In the glowing portal of untying soles
 
Our redesigned ink of dreams
 
Assembled new gateways of thought
 
Poised for subjects to enter
 
 
 
A bold declaration with the typewriter of space
 
At last, if all fails
 
In the dreams of men
 
We retrace back the golden bridge
 
To vermillion flowers
 
To find meadows of plenty
 
So as to train hearts and ears
 
To recognize ever flowing creativity
 
Nature poised in simplicity
 
 


Details | Free verse | |

Summer Day

Summer Day
Walking down the dusty country road 
Skipping rocks over the creek
Running through the pasture chasing cows
Taking a long dip in a cool lake on a hot summer day
Catching a horny toad to bring home to Mom
Whistling my way down the long dusty road
Free to do whatever I please along the way
What a great way to spend a summer day


Details | Free verse | |

Address to Miss mosquito

Address to miss mosquito(A free verse pun)

Miss mosquito why?why do all these?
your species-Anopheles breed freely,
And ours are hindered with impunity,
You multiply and feed on our haemoglobin,
Which decreases and weaken our demoglobin.

Can`t you be rational for a moment?
You introduced Mr.malaria into our world,
Which is spreading like wild fire
and has made many to be fired,
Anti-malaria remedies are powerless and vain.
But why!why!!why must you do this to
our world without a word?,
A perfect remedy is around the corner,
which will soon put this toothache to rest,
so as to have a permanent rest.

It is better to dye than to die,
Mosquito treated nets are here,
watch out!miss Anopheles or Another felix,
To be late is preferable than being the late,
The clock is ticking and thinking,
It`s going to be better for the better.


*Dedicated to UNICEF and WHO for their fight against MALARIA*.


WRITTEN BY OLU~malaria killer,8/28/11


Details | Free verse | |

Succumb to Illness

All those days spent in pain.

Memories washed away by the rain.

To have misplaced a forgotten loved one.

Falling into the depths of illness.

Now, I realize what it is like to succumb.

Where did those days of greatness go?

 

What have I become?

A monster with great power?

Maybe, I have succumb to illness.

My heart begins to beat.

Fast

Faster

Even Faster

As I hear the sirens buzzing in my ears.

 

In my mind...

I feel empty and dark.

In my mind...

I'm dying inside.

In my mind...

Voices are screaming words of terror.

 

I have lost.

The battle of life and death has been done.

It's what I hate most.

I have lost.

 

As I tell myself that it'll all be over soon...

I hear my mother saying "Sweetie wake up."

Stunned to death I awake.

Frantically, searching through my mind.

I find that I will never succumb to illness.


Details | Free verse | |

Secrets of the Subconscious

Secrets of the Soma

We don't wear our mind on our sleeve
We wear our mind.
Our body is an extension
Of mental characteristics and environmental dynamics, 
Like a suit custom-made from our past,
Each scar a sovereign of pain and knowledge,
Each flaw a feeling not forgotten.
"Fat thighs packed with childhood anger,
Baldness from trying to control everything,
Breast problems from refusing to nourish yourself,
Indigestion from gut-level fear, dread, and anxiety,
Halitosis from a rotten attitude."
As we speak, our cells are regenerating,
We are rewiring ourselves
According to what we THINK
The replicated cells are all confused;
They think MONEY is the same thing as WORRY;
The circuits have been crossed;
They think TIME is the same thing as FEAR.
You must synergize your synapses;
They have reconnected all crippled.
They think LOVE is the same thing as DISAPPOINTMENT.
They got all these ideas from patterns in your behavior,
And now like a run away disc drive, these patterns can't be stopped
OR
Rather they are difficult to stop,
Because you can't just change what you do,
You have to change the way you think,
You have to change the way you live
Or suffer your untimely demise.

Secrets of the Psyche

"All learning is remembering 
What we have forgotten."
At the blessed birth,
At the dharmatic death,
The elusive Ego,
Not dipping deeply enough
To uncover ultimate understanding.
The original origins,
The destiny of the final destination
Is blocked by biological needs,
The message muted
Sounding like stale static
As harmony brushes by beneath us.
We vaguely feel the familiarity
Like a long lost home
We never knew we had.
Truth teases time,
Testing us,
Knowing the soul is forever,
Telling us
The body will soon expire.
Subliminally 
We know ALL
Yet we
Only believe what we want to believe
And our frail bodies will die
Because of the fear that it is an inevitability.

- Joseph DeMarco


Details | Free verse | |

Freedom/Responsibility

Freedom, what all I could do only.........If
Freedom, not responsible to.................You
Remove all the fun; please, please let me...Take
The car for the night, I'll be home, obey......The
Rules, all of them__promise to stop for the..Train
Well he got freedom and he sped................Off
Until he picked up some friends at...............The
Local bar then he came to the ....................Track
He'd had just one, just one too many...........It's
Way too late, too late for him but he's .........Free
What his life could have been, who knew......But
Maybe the President or in senate.................It
Is possible the first leader of love................Can't
Contain my grief, if he stopped; not...............Go
His life on the right track, could have gone......Anywhere

(The end line is not my original idea but a direct quote form a book.)


Details | Free verse | |

Shattered Dreams

       You tried to hide your exploits in the dark.  The wives of those men knew you were 
sleeping around the trailor park.  You spread the disease of adultry around town.   Your 
promiscuity kept you financially above ground.  In a diary you kept every conquest written 
down.  Even that sexually stimulating ride that night on the merry- go-round.
       A limousine pulls up and you walk out in a fabulous red strapless dress.  That politician 
fed you diamonds an dfor the first time you felt like a princess.  You felt loved and secure by 
his wonderful deeds.  In exchange you catered to his sexual barbaric need.  Until eventually 
you found yourself physically abused and on your knees.  It was just a matter of time before 
he blew his top like some T.N.T.
       You crave revenge, but you're afraid to be a blackmailer.  So you're back home alone in 
your trailor.  But now you wear an ugly scar across your face.  The memory of the newly 
elected governor you can't erase.  In your diary you keep pictures of the two of you 
together. The scar will be a constant reminder forever. 
       Over the years life has been so hard on you.  From motel rooms to the avenue.  
Abusive men and steady drug use have left their residue.  At times you still blame the 
Governor for what you've gone through.  With no job skills and mouths to feed, you find 
yourself on your back spreading your knees.  Slowly over time sex for drugs would satisfy 
your needs.  And from appearance no one would have guessed you used to cheerlead.  Your 
health begins to rapidly decline.  You told your mother you were fine, but she did not agree.  
So off to the clinic you went, only to discover you were positive for H.I.V; 
       After she died, her family discovered the pictures and the diary.  Titled "Shattered 
Dreams".  End of story.......
 


Details | Free verse | |

Those pint glass bottomed spectacles

Those pint glass bottomed spectacles
are staring up at me
as you gurgle down another beer
and burp and boff with glee.

Gone are your inhibitions
your humanity and pride,
you're acting like an animal
now that alcohol's inside.

You're acting kind of foolish
like I've never seen before,
the kind of things you wouldn't do
if sober as before.

Gone is the man I used to know
the gent with love and care,
now when if you return at night
our home's a lion's lair.

Not realizing you're losing us
by being out from three,
you're spending all the money
on the booze not rent or tea.

You're married to the drinker's tap
unbalanced and disturbed,
our wardrobe's not a public lav
your senseless lunacy's absurd!

Now take off those pint glass spectacles
when you dare to look at me
you're killing off the you inside
along with love of family.


Details | Free verse | |

Voices Of Communication

They live in a world of silence 
Yet they can hear remarkably well
For they hear with their hands 
And their eyes speak volumes

Communication does not need to be verbal 
Much can be said through action 
Even more sometimes is said through inaction
Eyes have no ears, yet they hear all 

For pity can be heard and felt 
Fear of the unknown can be seen 
Ignorance is not silent 
It screams very loudly

The deaf may not hear a falling tree 
Yet a smile sends them your laughter 
A hug sends them your love 
Tears show them your sadness

They most certainly hear, 
The pity in your eyes 
The ignorance when you avert your gaze
The feeling of being shut out, silenced even more 

Talk to them with your hands 
Silence to you, but wonderful conversation to them 
Filled with emotion and action 
Speak to them with your eyes, end their silence 

They are deaf, not mute, not dumb 
Simply quiet in a world of noise 
Waiting for you to communicate
Waiting for you to finally hear their voice


Details | Free verse | |

Ode To My Phoenix

For days, for nights
you moaned in pain.
For weeks, for months
you cried in vain.

For days, for nights
you wept in silence.
For weeks, for months
you anguished with prudence.

For days, for nights
I leeched on your strength.
For weeks, for months
I feasted on your health.

For days, for nights
I gripped my claws in your veins.
For weeks, for months
You held on and soon, reigned.

On the night of that day
you screamed.
On the week of that month
I wailed.

At last, it was over.
Finally, Im here on this earth.
You were sober-
but you said, it has all its worth.

Fly, my mother!
Soar high!
Spread your wings!
Enjoy the sky!

Let us share this joy,
this bliss, this mirth;
for my birth
is your rebirth!


Details | Free verse | |

It's So Intoxicating {End Line Word}

fly above fruited grains my feathered ------- Friends
dip dive encircle the sun's orbage ------------- Don't
lusterious valleys and mountaintop ranges  --  Let
forbidden flights go un captured by other winged --- Friends
document footage of their performance ------- Drive
dedicated knowing their feeling a tad -----      Drunk




Tribute To Friends


Entry For Dana Ann Smith-Johnson's
End Line Words Contest


Details | Free verse | |

What's For Sale?

The doorbell rings continuously with no patience.
approaching it makes you curious, but cautious
as you sway to the doorway, you glance through the two-by-two window
the transparent glass blurs the figure but you know exactly what to expect
as you pry the door open you gasp
a gasp not from shock or excitement but from the culprit in front of you
 he wastes no time and unfolds a menu of some sort
explaining what he has for sell
what he is trying to infest your brain with persuasion
a menu filled bounteously with terms and items
pictures of organs and intangible items.
a conscience, love, clarity and the pursuit of existence
”you cant sell me these things, they are’t real”
you exclaim in a blunt manner
he says, these are yours. 
you’ve lost them over a long duration
it’s you that wants to buy these.
these things belong to you.
”You are a robber sir, you know that?”
I accused, but he replied with, “I think you’re the robber here”
I gathered up my money and bought all that I could.
and as I walked inside feeling accomplished.
The surplus to these traits were only mere
pure shards of my life
tiny bits of my past
and as I endure them
I just feel like I have my entire life
empty, without a structured figure.
without a developed mind
without a feeling of warmth
with a corrupted self-worth
contained in a small glass tube.


Details | Free verse | |

Inside Your Head

When I first took up residence,
We were neighbours who kept to ourselves.
But I needed more room
Abundantly provided
Thanks to your unwitting generosity.

That's when your trouble started.
Those odd bouts of tiredness
You put down to overwork and stress.
All you needed was a holiday
Or so you were led to believe.

I was sorry about your little headaches
But I had to stretch myself still further.
Even beyond that point we were doing so well
Until you began seeing double.
That's when all hell broke loose
And they found you had an unwanted guest.
They tried to evict me
But I had burrowed deep 
To keep you as my host.

Our symthanatic relationship
Means we must go together.




Details | Free verse | |

Super Powers

Super Powers

I have super powers,
Haven’t you heard?

I can lift huge water towers
With my magic powers.

As fast as milk sours
I can make grown men cower.

My curves are so mighty
Just to see them,
You’ll find yourself
Running for hours.

My ears’hearing
Con penetrate thick walls,
When you’re miles away,
They will hear you
Singing about me
In the soapy shower.

When you kiss
My luscious lips
And sway with my
Slender hips,
You’ll moan
Much louder.

Because girls
As fine as me
Have super powers.


Details | Free verse | |

CAPERS OF CARELESS HUMANS

Scattered plastic battles
and yesterday's newspapers
weren't tossed by a capricious wind,
blame this on the capers of careless humans.


I angrily watch them dispose of them where they sit....
on the seats of buses and trains as they stand up and rush out;
cities have their problems and littering increases abuse...
would anyone thinking of some kind of haven, do that with intent?


In my neighborhood I often observe a Chinese man picking up 
Pepsi bottles and newspapers while cars ignore him and speed up...  
doesn't he teach us to be neat, to clean after ourselves and be good people?
Many couldn't give a damn, leaving rubbish everywhere for the sanitation to pick up. 


You have heard my allegory...did it offend? 
Have you experienced it and really gotten you mad?
Who would walk at night, stepping on strewn trash, and fear the ugly rodents?
It's a social plague we can't cure, unless we clean up our act and try to make amends.




Details | Free verse | |

Stockbridge

Last year’s alarm clock by my beside silently, vigilantly ticked away until 4:02 AM 
In the hour of Platonic picture-perfect darkness kept company solely by the bloodshot red
Of the alarm clock reading 4:02 AM
And a suspicious newcomer, causing panic like a foreigner in a shtetl, arrived
In my abdomen, pain, as from machete clutched by any modern horror-flick fiend
Or ancient Mayan warrior bronzed by the timeless sun, who had seen it all by then
Pain induced, and the panic of ignorant xenophobia at this alien agony, nameless
Causeless, baseless
And I, car-less, helpless to the whims of any pluricellular stowaway aboard the meals I ate
Or long-waiting malcontent festering quietly at my expense, awaiting my moment of weakness,
Before crashing the drums of revolution,
Or even maverick cell born of my own body, swearing me the true enemy
And the alarms are sounded too late, or rather too early, before any outside force can be
called
So I collapse into the indifferent suede of the sofa, 
With mutable chestnut Rorschach blots on the cushion shadowing our past encounters,
And I conduct the grand electronic symphony that permits the tinny notes of
Arlo Guthrie’s guitar, which shoot like bullets, speed like beams of light 
Across the years from 1967 to today, from Stockbridge to my apartment
To me, son of Abraham, of Isaac, of Jacob, and of a thousand other fathers
My world defined by pasts, by traditions, by the presents of others.
The pain subsides like the tide, backing away foot by foot as it glares me in the eye
Grudging me victory, in the battle, anyway, though the war may be yet begun,
So I nestle in my quasi-significant nook in time, as in the hug of an oversized sofa,
Between the aftershock of near-death and the afterglow of “Alice’s Restaurant”
And I hope my present may too hurdle across impossible chasms
Like Wells’ Argonauts, my presently unknown gifts,
May suffice as to be a past for the present of another
To voyage to the future to comfort their solace, though my hand may be eternal still,
Like the acoustic guitar that had its day in 1967


Details | Free verse | |

Aquanted

Liquid!
This night flows as you,
thick as caramel, and as smooth,
                    warm this old tin roof.

Golden Sun, through thrice-locked gates,


seven seals and seven lambs,
but enough of me, what of you?

            No, i don't know my sign,
uncouth, like the ravages of time.
Popularized myths sing of my better days,
when the holiest of us still stood tall.

Tender talons tease twisted tales, ten-times told.
Forever falling farther from faerie's family flame.
Divided, divined, divulged, distasteful, distracted.

     Silver, not gold.
Lead, mercury, copper.


Details | Free verse | |

God's Will Reigns

God's Will Reigns

As turbulent storms blow over the ocean,
they rage against the sea.

Life's troubles brew as violently,
wisdom settles them with calm and reason
and waits patiently for a better season.

God's will reigns
and his plan unfurls as easily
as the six days he fashioned
the world and all that's in it.

His mission is to test our faith
and sharpen our character
so like the tall green trees,
we'll bear fruit plentifully.


Details | Free verse | |

Sad State of Affair's

Conflict and fear
still useless mechanic's
within' the framework
of our mind's gear's.....

The battlefield's rage on the greater stage
while humanity wage's the smaller within'
inner conflict becomes the outer we inflict
instead of nourishing love to cherish
we extinguish each in fear and perish
sad legacy of divinity for humanity
defilement of divine unity...a tragedy

Exchanging love for fear and hatred
false sense of security is hurried
by those who perpetrate hate,and
would have us believe in what they create

Whether it's a neighborhood brawl
an ugly scene in our learning hall's
all this violence only stall's
our purpose true,
to become better and improve

Until we,individually,can accept this truth
we will continue this trash heap
this polluted state of mind we'll keep
as love continue's to look upon and weep.......


Details | Free verse | |

Desire

Shepherds exquisite rosie blushed skies
between seas of clouds drifting by
As the veil of evening spirituality rises,
the layers strip away
until thin enough to reveal
a night-time previously unseen
Work of art,
Heaven’s beauty
A Queen of the skies.
An air if intoxication
trips the mind
for a moment belief is enforced
Unveiled a Guardian Angel
set to watch over us,
protect us with love
Taken too quickly from our world,
this feminine stunner
with long black trailing locks
that reach mid back;
a mouth so hot,
sophisticated, 
elegantly wrapped form
This spiritual purity,
so youthful;
is lifted to higher realms,
where as a winner,
her floral crown is raised before her
She watches with breath of reservation
Her eyes look on seductively
filled with knowing need
Enfolded with the love 
of those that look up to her
Her premature wings
wrap her neck and shoulders,
fluffy, white as purest cotton wool.
Her time, 
her pleasure,
her passion,
her promise, 
her prize
Yours to seek and find
A picture perfect place in mind
Desire


Details | Free verse | |

Soothsay, the Poppy Seeds

Seething poppies whisper to me
How soothsayers are a lie.

Betrothed with thoughts of internal
Elegance, outward recklessness,
Divine intervention by stormcloud;
Pregnant with crooked emotion,
Clumsy words, laughter like a murder of crows--
Hear them:
The flowerterrible, the naked and tempermental.

They devour my truth.

A dull concept of time reels through
Candy coated consciousness--
Relative all the same; "Maybe they come here
For a reason."



"Soothsay, the Poppy Seeds"
Jenna-Nichole Conrad
Wordsmith


Details | Free verse | |

Migraine

You are the pound of a drum, percussion inside of my head.
You are my cold, hardened pillow made of bricks; you are red.
You ruin me and I hate you. You are my cracking skull--
a build-up of bursting pressure. You are my gray, blurry
vision--you are my blindness. You are my undying nausea; you
make me so terribly sick.


Details | Free verse | |

Slap my face

Bang!
you try to beat the hurt out of your head.
Slap
longing for human touch, even as you bled.
Butt
my whole life I bang my head on a unwieldy wall,
Punch
wish it could end as quick as I throw.

Hold me,
I need you, anybody to give me love.
A hug for the humbug of this bottomless unforgiving world.
I don't want this unlovely face to feel tears again.
Each drop,
a waste of food...
and you, need me.
Every grunt a loss of oxygen for those,
want me.

I guess it's true
that the beautiful are the pearl of this oyster world.
But perhaps I am the grit
that makes pearl possible...


I wrote this after a tough evening of work where I saw someone (a client) hit themselves and then cry. (I was and am a mental health support worker).


Details | Free verse | |

My Turn To Dance

I discover me,
A dancing jester
To this life presented
To me.
I scanter and roll
And smile so sheepishly.
The music beats with drums
of haunting days
to come.
I still dance.
And feel weak still.
I take off my 
Jester's hat,
With a few strands
of hair in my hand.
No need to help me.
It's my turn to 
dance.


Details | Free verse | |

Two weeks

Two weeks
I gained half a stone.
Strained the lack
purging your lips...
Took a while
to see
why I corrupted to escape-
why I had begun damaging
again,
because
you dear
take the heroine so openly.

What you think clever
you do not deceive.
Did you forget?
I have been far down,
far beyond-
Its insufferable!

Can you be so obnoxious
to think you are exempt-
no mental
and bodily
woes
that are human to endure?

Because it has not happened,
yet?

You are laughably
careless,
disrespectful, ignorant little girl.

You wave suffrage
to the recovered,
like a plague dressed in daffodils.

Let your skin drip addiction!
Maybe you will pain
to see
how rude
hateful
hurtful you are.

Let you rot
in knowledge of my care.


Details | Free verse | |

Reality Barbie

she came to me in tears
penetrated
by molesting looks and
stairs

her breath misted
the mirror 
she obsessed over

weight was always felt
upon her heavy hardened brow
 
she stretched her arms
around 
me and wept
vomiting her soul
and burning the calories
of sorrow
away

my comfort was obese
and mocking
as I trembled under
her gargantuan 
blubbering
and 
my heart
began 
to fall

why must we conquer
this fanatic feat
up treadmills
and through
shopping malls
sliding between
large and insignificant
to rock on our backs
to crunch out
the pain of childish
teasing
and social
imagination


Details | Free verse | |

Self-Acceptance

A prisoner to the fat.
Devouring self joy.
Longing to heal.
Celebrating the life,
God has given.
Smiling and laughing,
I embrace this sexy belly.
An angel of desire,
Naked and wet,
I take my breath away.


Details | Free verse | |

either or

In the cracks of the ghetto walls
the eyes of the addict bleed for more
the smoke billows through the lungs of the panhandler
thirsty for more the alcoholic quenches his thirst
and the smoker doesnt realise he is getting high
the drug dealer the underground secret service
among kings of the poor leading the rich to success
society society is this what is before our eyes
fallen and spoken for?


Details | Free verse | |

The Predator and His Victim

He forced himself in, proud;
And, he’s boasting inside of her;
He couldn’t care less, if this 
Beautiful, angelic face’s screaming to death,
‘Cos of his overweight body covering her,
Making it hard for her to breath,
Till he exploded his, with great contentment;
A valiant man, victorious truly he is;
Then, he takes joy seeing her naked body in pain;
Gasping, she uttered words: “I begged you not to do it;
Now, you’ll feel my anger;
It will slowly turn your happiness in a tearful rage;
Don’t blame me, for I’ve warned you!”
But, he really not minds what she says;
Then, he stormed his exit, thru the dark alley
Like a valiant conquistadors;
Yet, before he could leave, she managed to gather
Her last strength and she said: “I am a HIV positive!”
He stopped and looks back at her. She’s dead. 
Her curse begins…. 



Details | Free verse | |

THE UTOPIAN'S DREAM

A wizard, not a wisher can
do magic with his powers,
if all were wizards...
wishes would be non-existent.

And like ordinary, simple people...
I will make my three wishes today,
but they are not for myself at all:
they are for others living far away.

My first wish is this: 
I would like to have the unlimited wealth
of Bill Gates or Donald Trump, 
not to invest in software technology or
purchase airplanes or skyscrapers, 
but to feed the world's hungry...that horrible hunger,
which even Pope Benedict XVI can't wipe out completely
with the thousands of Catholic Missionary Charities.

My second wish is this:
have a gathering of all faiths
once a year in every continent,
and let its people praise God in their own way,
some will disagree with my universal idea so unrealistic;
it would be a spiritual and cultural event 
that everyone will remember a lifetime,
so why shouldn't there be a Faith Day,
bringing glory to the Almighty and unifying all races?
Many others will follow me in my quest!

My third wish is this:
to end all wars and unexplainable hatred,
some sacrifice themselves for a cause that's not holy...
inflamed by the deceitful conception of immortality.
Wouldn't it be awesome to travel to other countries that have no boundary?
The stranger would welcome anyone, and the enemy would be a friend.
A dreamer...am I? Yes, all dreams start with a vision, and mine is truly a glorious one!
Happiness will gladden all hearts, and glee will shine on all faces;
harmony will fortify the bonds of friendship, and everyone will love their neighbors...
and hate and unkindness will be eternally buried into the past.

Entered in Amy Green's contest, " If I could have three wishes "


Details | Free verse | |

How Do You Price a Smile?

Is it $1.99?
$9.99?
Or Mastercard's priceless?
I don't know....
But it's one way to grow...
To share a smile
No price too much...
Shows you have,
That human touch.


Details | Free verse | |

Gemini

With a fondness of life,
jest and pleasure
You’re a lover 
of unmeasurable attention as ever
In the third sign of the zodiac
known for storytellers
Of elements Fire and Air,
masculine considered
Diurnal or day orientated,
Physically or mentally related
Primarily focusing
on spirituality and activity
Being adaptable, eloquent,
versatile and lively
Youthful, witty, logical,
spontaneous, communicative;
All thes bing positive traits
are held back by the negative
For you’re changeable, inconsisatent,
cunning, nervous and inquisitive
Restless, superficial,tense
and gossip – well you’re talkative
You hate to be stuck in a rut,
or being left alone
Love novelty, variety,
anything unusual or unknown
Working multiple projects at a time
you’re addicted
Disliking mental action, conventional learning,m
being restricted
Gemini’s inclined to direct energies
into the world around them
Anatomy – rules arms, shoulders,
lungs and nervous system
A strive to learn persevearance
and culture depth
Subjects are lovers of language,
poets, bard, or wordsmiths


Details | Free verse | |

Crazy Insanity

Through this crazy insanity
You see the grey balloon sailing a drift
Into the midst of raging turmoil
Full of hectic words of misleading
Misunderstandings and unused 
Smiles of lost spirit of those who have
Departed from these spheres of influence.
Baby Blue stay true to you who is most dear.
Don’t jump onto the train of continuous
Vomits, injections and a pump of a gut;
Your gut, a feeling in which you seem to
Pay no attention to more and more.
The mirror in which you look in, 
Plays tricks with you, jokes and lets you
Know the farce you seem to believe.
This ongoing party you seem to always throw
In the bathroom with your closest secrets
Is getting tiring and the favors you’ve given out
Are running out and you my dear child,
Are running out of time yourself.
Your clocks timer hasn’t run out so please,
Enter my arms of redemption and recovery


Details | Free verse | |

Addiction

Inside me burns a flame, exhaled breath 
slumps against my heart, falls drunk into my chest. 
Miniature storms rage through my bloodstream 
command wars with my senses, intoxicate my thoughts 
as they waltz through my veins. 

My weathered skin, aged beyond it's years, tinted 
in places, Marked with the grin of the moon. Yellow, 
like sand-dunes. My oval eyes, once pools of spring water 
have suffocated beneath my layer of unrest, collapsed 
in on themselves, hanging, leaning west. 

A fraction of myself, I am distorted, un-happy and craving more. 
Controlled by the hand that weakens me, my white dictator. 
I feel the rush waltzing with my bloodcells, then collapse 
in the settling of the storm. Like a beaten wife, I cannot leave, 
I am controlled by the lust that grips me, my addiction and it's lure.


Details | Free verse | |

Sincerely Yours,

Dear friend ,

The world means nothing.
Its set in flames.
Even worse we roam with cold hearts trying to look the part,
in this guilded age.

This is something I wish not to be a part of.
I no longer want to be another soul endlessly making
contact with sole and pavement.
I'm striving for abatement. 

For meaning I've always looked at dictionaries.
For significance we've always looked at actions.
So please do take another look and see what this letter is for.

Our education is supposed to be priceless, yet we can't afford it.
Our outlook on life is supposed to be uplifting , yet our vision is always distorted.
Our struggle is supposed to be significant , than why is it our stories won't be recorded?

Does this not trouble you my friend?
We complain about being second rate citizens yet there are those who don't live
but attempt to survive in their homes that are assigned in third world countries since before birth.

Where is the justice if the hearts are starting to turn into just ice?
Wheres the justice if a benevolent man was robbed of their life?
Where's the justice in this non-sense?
I can't see it . All I see is us bracing for a cruel consequence.

Pardon me if I trouble you with the questions you can't answer.

But i've outweighed the pros and the cons of this situation.
I no longer wish to to be just another number in this logorithm of lies. 
I no longer wish to be a variable with no value of his own.
I wish to become the variable that comprehends the absolute value of sincerity.

Real love is that which shows no fear.
Unfortunately I am a coward.
I no longer can love a world that is platinum plated and wishes not to remember
the warmth of a child's smile.

Even the stars wish not to roam on the skies of the falsely lit nights.
Even the moon moans because of how far from her we've drifted.
Even the willos weep when we no longer wish to see them stand and instead
choose them to stand on.

I've outweighed the courage and the fear.
But what I found frightened me further.
What weighed us down the most was indifference.

With that discovery I knew what I had to do.
I must leave and find somewhere where gravity is no longer so heavy.

I know I can't outweigh death for it's a burden that falls on the shoulders of everyone.
I'm truly sorry that i'm a selfish coward 
For I have chosen the coward's end.

I wish you goodluck my friend,

Sincerely yours,

The shadow of men


Details | Free verse | |

When I Run, I break the Sound Barrier

When I Run, I break the Sound Barrier

Moving through stagnant space
The world’s inertia pulls against my rebelling figure
Frantically trying to impede my speed

My ears
Fill with the rhythmic wind
Of my breath
My blood racing life to
My extremes

I can’t hear…
my mother
my students
my ex

I can’t hear
my failures
my insecurities
my problems

I see only the road
Create only sweat
Race only myself

My goal--
Hedonistic Exhilaration
as the barriers
Explode


Details | Free verse | |

Post Quantum Self-Revolution

Dive into electric spectrum
Sending all praises to animal magnetism 
Fueling vital sparks of Love
As global flesh interpenetrates
Each unsuspecting mind, clocked with time

A snake eats its own tail
Recycling past and present
Revealing the possible whole

Out of a mortal clutch
Uncoil, the spine springs like string
Kundalini advances within
Ripping a gateway of Now

Surging forth Niagra Falls
God-Eye opened for the pasture
As perception unfilitered looses silver
Snaking its way through central channel

Giving Earth back its plenty
Healing the wounds of war
Removing doubts and fear
Eclipsing every intelligence near


Details | Free verse | |

Writing the Pain Away

Maybe if I just write...and write...and write...
and put ALL of my thoughts and words down on paper...
 
The pain will go away...
and then I will be happy...
and content
and my head won't hurt,
and my heart won't hurt,
and I won't feel so bad anymore. 

If I just write...
and write...
and write...
and write...
and get all of these words out of my head
and off of my heart
and put them down on paper.

Maybe then I will be able to "Write the Pain Away."

 

(November 14, 2010 Wausau, Wisconsin)

(c) Copyright 2010 by Christine A Kysely, All Rights Reserved 


Details | Free verse | |

Circle of madness

Insecurities fuel paranoia
paranoia fuels fear
doubt and weakness of self 
fuels that paranoia that others
are alike which fuels fear of being hurt
cheated on
lied to because you know there is alack of trust
lack of control 
fuels fear
fuels paranoia
fuels insecurity
one must doctor themselves
to be strong
to trust
they wont be hurt
to not show their weak character to be liked back
there are many reasons to look for softer places
to feel numb
to forget the sensitivity
of every day life
regret
mistakes
fondness of the path of least resistance
struggle and tears
one doctors themselves the best way they know how
the ways they have seen done before
there is no answer


Details | Free verse | |

God's Little Critters

vast wilderderness she lays her head 
moss strewn rock beds and nil vegetation 
in the distant the lone wolf begins to howl 
no sun to call her own   
just gotten entangled in a predators sneer 
shes begins gnawing frantically
blood soaked coating
and one less hoof to stand with
this tiny deer finally had gotten freed
just as I was picking up the phone to
call animal control to help out
one of God's own little critters  




Tribute To
God's Critters

Also Entry For
Laura Mckenzie's
Beyond Nightfall Contest


Details | Free verse | |

Love v Lust

Perversion, lost in thinking.
Somebody's identical,
But where?

Do I drown in these thoughts alone?
Reaching, stretching, grabbing...
Is there love, hidden deep within me?

Lust overpowers, takes over, strangles.
The rainbow glistens but is it real?
Preconceptions, faded and arbitrary. 

Dirty secrets are everywhere.
People smile but are they happy?
Do the stars really shine so brightly?

Will I wake up dying and diseased?
Decaying, bitterness upon my body.
My mind deteriorates and succumbs to it.


Details | Free verse | |

A past setting Sun

A day has passed with a setting sun risen once more
Washed away all traces of last night it did
When stained across the leaves . . . one tear from my eye unbroken 
Fallen in a screaming one million times over again through teeth shut tightly
Again all over once more it falls
Falls and tears asunder the earth beneath my feet
Leaving a gaping maw behind
Hungry to swallow all of me it does, has done, will do if I dare to sleep
If I . . . if

Wherein did the night go, if at all? I ask
For still beneath this sun holding its light fast and tightly
I stand above the broken earth in shadows deep
Born of lavender run to deepening sorrows
As if the air all around me could speak, would speak, will speak
Already has cried out to scream like this wailing soul stuck inside my chest
Scream to echoing everything!!
Everything that I am, have been, will be, ever was . . . could ever be
To pay and spare this pain I see yawning before my brother’s broken life

And there it is,
The why of the darken cloud
Hanging above me weeping tears across my soul
Echoes, echoes really, just echoes
Of the shrieking in my heart
The crying unwashed tears breaking across my waking mind
Thundering like a thousand waves crashing across the sea
To . . . 
To smash through my unconscious mind like . . .
Like a past setting sun

When it will rise no more


Details | Free verse | |

Looking forward to another day

All the tears i've cried

Were all because you lied

I'm slowly breaking on the inside

And now all of my love has died

 

You used to be my prince

Until that first time you ever made me wince

You left so many prints

And my hearts been broken ever since

 

I took a chance with you

And my face ended up black and blue

 I thank god everyday now that we"re through

So that I can try move on to someone new

 

He is my prince

He never makes me wince

Or leaves any prints

and my heart has been better ever since

 

He always wants to stay

I hear my name when he prays

He makes the nightmares stay at bay

And now I can say I'm looking forward to another day.


Details | Free verse | |

Health

Health is about
Public awareness
In-depth interconnectedness
Spiritual consciousness
Mental aliveness
Emotional fitness
Meaning, wholness
Global welleness.


Details | Free verse | |

But I'm Not

Tears are being shed, but i'm not sad
Arguments are being screamed, but i'm not angry
Thoughts keep coming to me, but i'm not wodering
Dreams are being dreamed, but i'm not asleep
Tales are being written, but i'm not brain storming
Cars are being driven, but i'm dont have a licence
Songs are being sung, but i'm not on key
Babies are being born, but i'm not bearing
Mountains are being climbed, but i'm not hiking
Food is being eaten, but i'm not hungry
Flowers are blooming, but i'm not planting
Water is being drunk, but i'm not thirsty
The world is being explored, but i'm not on the computer
Paper is being sorted, but i'm not organizing
Houses are being built, but i'm not moving
Goals are being accomplished, but i'm not setting them
People are finding me, but i'm not seeking
Airplanes are traveling, but my feet are on the ground
Bathing suits are being worn, but i'm not swimming
Lights are turning on, but i'm in the dark
People are living, but i'm dead


Details | Free verse | |

The Scar

When first we met,
I marveled at your flawless flesh;
nary a wrinkle or blemish did offset.

Until cancer took your breast,
leaving a scar, obvious as a mountain range
upon your once flawless flesh.

The scar a reminder of what had been
and a symbol, not of an end, 
but a new beginning to life again.


Details | Free verse | |

The Dentist.

    Sitting in the dentists chair,
     I wish I was any where else but here.
     Am I scared no not  I,
     look at my clammy hands and you know I lie.
     I look around the sterile room,feeling and sensing only gloom.
      I  see the instruments by the side,
      wondering what secrets they hide.
      The door now opens wide,
      a man in a white coat steps inside.
       "Good morning Mr Dunford how are you today"
        Keeping my cool,"very well "Isay.
       He is now in front of me,and says"open wide let me see":
      As I open my mouth wide I feel the instruments 
       poking inside.
        The next words "two fillings are missing,"
        don't help at all  I wish I could run away,
          but I know I have to stay.
         As the drilling starts you can hear my heart,
         my pulse is getting faster,
          I think I am going to fade away,
         no please God not today I  don't want to go this way.
         
      


Details | Free verse | |

Fleshy entrance to God

Sacred sinews, porous blood and all
A heartbeat tracked for which
Love can ring its beated call

The wind breathes through me
As caterpillars dance
Innocent creatures becoming
Man, dazzling their hidden run

Planets are poised
Starlight throbs adjacent
Galaxies swirl beneath the sea
All to bring your love back to me


Details | Free verse | |

Old Claw Hammer

Its handle, darkened with age,
had split from bottom end up.
It’s necessary to hold it together, 
with a tight grip, 
while striking the nail.

“I bought this in Montana,” he said, 
holding up the hammer he was using 
to repair my wisteria trellis.

“Whoa,” I said.
 “Can you still use it?”

“Watch,” he said, 
driving nails into wood.

He looked at me in triumph,
hand extended toward the trellis arm,
now straight as an arrow.

His eyes spoke to me,
not of an old hammer's worth,
but of his own un-laureled vitality,
the promise,
and the permanence of love.





Details | Free verse | |

Chandelier

The crackled chandelier,
Lies under the staircase now-
No tender repair exists for it’s careful amber glass.


Details | Free verse | |

Tumor Talk

Diagnosis' free floating through re circulated air.
Sunken eyes, bald heads, aching bodies sit in chairs meant for comfort.
The scent of fear mingling with sickness and the faint tinge of hope.
Bodies having been pushed to the limits yet still going on.
Idle chit chat never made.
Deep conversations circling around a common denominator.
The dreaded "C" word.
My own story locked tight between pursed lips.
My eyes downcast, having heard these similar tales many times before.
My own condition hits hard as I settle in my own chair.
Knowing I have my own tumors that reside deep in my bones.
My medications at home lined on the counter,
Soldiers ready for the battle to stunt growth...
To help intravenous drugs freeze my illness.
To put it to sleep as if a fussy child.
My own prayers silently whispered...
Sleep needs to come and overtake these tumors.
My deepest fears long realized, long ago accepted.
Knowing that as sleep ever so slowly folds itself
Around my tumors the inevitable will happen.
Just as a fussy child fights sleep and once gives in
Rests deeply and peacefully...
As the child will awaken my tumors will awaken and then spread.
Most of these others here have cures.
I have the inevitable.
But I too have hopes.
I still have dreams.
I long for tomorrows held out of my grasp.
Battling for mental and physical strength to just push on.
To not give into the doubts and fears.
To know that I'm here for a reason.
May not be for the common good of mankind, but something.
My tumor talk spreads as words on paper,
Not floating on currents of air or streams of blood.
My tumor talk once written can now begin my legacy of passed on hope.
Of being here to witness tomorrows that blessedly,
Have been put in my hands and those of others.


Details | Free verse | |

The Waiting Game

Waiting in my box of life,
we listen to the voices
filled with panic and terror.

We hold back,
waiting for asylum,
dread filling our essence.
For every second delayed, 
the farther away he moves.

We anticipate every need.
I check my tools. 
Is it all there?
I look down at my hand
and I wonder, will they do?
Will they stand the test?
Can I hold back 
the tide of death
as it swirls around him?

Quickly, we move in,
I see his lifeless form
laying on the battlefield.
I approach hesitantly,
dodging dirt and debris,
running through a hailstorm of lead.
Finally reaching my prize,
I pray for a breath.

I slowly pry loose
the enter twined fingers of Jordan
from around his throat.

I shield his broken body
with my own as I work.

slowly, I defeat the demon.
Eyes open, groggy, mumbled words
through a haze of morphine.
"I knew you'd come,. Doc."


Details | Free verse | |

Beautiful Interruption

You have come so quickly,

Where do I begin to

Warmly welcome you?

You are unexpected,

My beautiful interruption.

How do I come to reasons?

Skeptic of your coarse, your purpose,

I only arrive to disillusions and discord.

Should I be shocked? As if nothing led

up to the fateful present....

Well, I could

For the sum of all these

Are not so easily understood.

The long waited meltdown has begun

A mountain of pride

begins to collide

Certainty is no more, I have left it in mercy's hands

The bitter acceptance still has not settled in

For you force your way to stay

And I, I have nothing else to do

I have no choice, but to only leave my life up to a hopeful chance.

 



Details | Free verse | |

Depressed

3$ Scratch off.
Glory. Money equals zero.
Maybe I'll get 
rich off of you.
Will not need application
Will not need inflation
but only a little luck.
and I could  sit here
doing nothing.

Make me rich
You looch.
You ate all of my yoo-hoo.


Details | Free verse | |

Manic

I am running out of time.
I have one shot to make
But it is too far away
and I have few words to use.
@ what time
am I right?
@ what time
am I dumb?
@ what time 
do you reap me?


Details | Free verse | |

Take A Look

You complain when you cant have chocolate, You cry when you don’t get your way, You throw a fit when you cant watch TV, you expect people to help you when you get hurt. You turn up the heat when you get cold, You want all the new electronics, You are used to getting everything, You expect to much. While your fantasizing about your date, and playing your new video game, others are fantasizing about that single, lonely piece of bread they will get for there next meal, They will be thinking of how they are not going try very hard, not to get frostbite during the night while they sleep on rocks. People will be hoping for a simple cloth to cover up there wound, Not some cast or brace to wear. They probably don’t even know those are invented, They will be planning on how to survive the next few days, while you fret over what you are going to where. You don’t like the gifts you get, They are happy with a blanket. We spend $10,000 on fixing a hockey arena, You could save peoples lives with that money. Look at the worlds picture, Not your own.


Details | Free verse | |

No More Tears

I hold back the tears as I watch his crippled 8 yr. old body be pushed into the operating
room for how many times now, his small hand waving at me, a look of fear partially covered
with a faint smile. His life uncertain, his destiny out of my control, but the touch of
his hand as they wheel him in to but another surgery gives me hope, hope that this time
will be the last and he'll come out whole and happy for the first time in his young years,
please No More Tears...


Details | Free verse | |

Electric Sheep

Verse and drama
Panorama
Screen built right into my head

Mood organ
White gorgon
Medicate me back to bed

Attached by my eternity
Dead rebirth in deity
Spontaneous alacrity
Advanced hyper reality

Android fixtures to the south
The sandmen drag me to my sleep
Dreams that come and never go
As I count electric sheep


Details | Free verse | |

A Mother's Love

Teenage daughter sick with cancer
Feeling sad, blue, and chemo ugly
Crying tears of grief wanting to die 
Seeking relief from the whole situation

Mother desperate to help daughter
Lighten the load of horror exposed
Into the bathroom goes
With the clippers all her hair goes, goes

A mother's love goes the extra mile
A mother's love gives that extra smile
A mother's love gives, gives, gives
A mothe's love goes radiates all the while

(Not original idea but from a movie that I am watching called "My Sister's 
Keeper".)


Details | Free verse | |

The usual chemical baldin

Theme park legacies unnoticed
billion dollar scandals no one talks about
the under rug swept truth of the army taking over your government
telling what president to say what to what city
nothing out of the ordinary
the wars of our fathers, that carry on and on, with no break in between
just generation gaps, the three legs of one war, to fool the gullible
terrorism utilised to make impact statements of common knowledge
leaving you in your rut
in your corner
the pornographic clippings of muscle men
steroids and drug abuse used for a miscarriage
the usual carnival
the chemicals of the previous wars soaked into their soil
now nothing there grows
wicked this way comes
better this time
a law suit
hands washed clean, you look the other way when it happens to me
the gang unit doesn't even know
politically correct they are
selling the cover up
for the side effects of the wars of our fathers
the soils that soon will no longer bear fruit
something in the water, we tell ourselves is sewage
the pieces fit and we blame our mothers and fathers
after the doctors, after the brothers, and our lovers
where it all started, looking back to the deserted wastelands
of your chemical warefare
i see your footsteps
where the children starve
blaming monkeys for disease
we thought we would never be
something wicked this way comes
you look the other way
but here it is
the pieces fit
the usual game
hunger pains
disease
the cover up in your face
under rug swept
yet a torture
you dont see, blinding me


Details | Free verse | |

In Need Of Therapy

Ulysses Rudolph Roberts
a Federalist by default
laid on the couch
and spilled out his guts
to a women he
envisions to be
the ultimate 
siren of shrinks.
With her hair in a bun
books, glasses
and that half buttoned
blouse thing.
He cried and he shook
over the battles he fought
and how everything
that ever happened
was never his fault.
After all
he would reason
he had built
the best fortress
in all God's Kingdoms
with ultra thick walls
turrets and draws.
The tallest
strongest and soundest
in all worlds.
So what if he had to kill
capture and rape
in order to feed 
the armies he made
he had God's blessings
His sacred grace.
Yet, Ulysses was
still cowering in the arm
of an old red couch
and crying out loud
It's Not My Fault!
as the Doctor scribed
delusional 
pathological 
denial...


Dean Walker


Details | Free verse | |

What are we doing to us?

What are we doing to our planet? 
Processing oils, 
pumping air with oxides;
be them sulphur, 
or nitrogen gas.
Burning coals,
manufacturing chemicals.
Making acid rain -
burning our -
dumb ass!


Details | Free verse | |

The Climb

The Climb
Up and up we
Climb up the spiral
Staircase.

Each step you take
You curse my
Namesake

Each step I take
Each Moment
I wish someone
Else could
Take my place

When we get
To the top
Look out
At the vista

Watching the ocean
Lick the sugar sand
Coastline

Nothing but
Peace is
On your face.

Climbing the
Lighthouse Was
Not a waste.


Details | Free verse | |

HEALING

There is no healing
Without meaning
And no meaning
Without wholeness
No wholeness
Without holiness
No holiness
Without  relatedness
In-depth relatedness
With all there has been
With all there is
With all there is 
about to be.

Healing
Is the inward journey
Beyong the pysical body
Healing Aacall
To the internal pharmacy
A call for more identity
A call for more integrity
A call for more  inner intimacy
A call for more innerharmony.


Details | Free verse | |

Early AM Yoga

Sweltering skin upon sweltering skin,
Movement in the early morning heat,
My eyes are enlightened,
Without even opening.


Details | Free verse | |

skin

that bruised and contused
epidermis after a skirmish
bandaged and anti-somethinged
for whatever next is coming

that fleshed out scathe of 
open wound from what was said
and the way the knife turned 
as it quickly sliced out pride

some diligent nursing will
form some scars to cover
the vulnerability felt, raw
but too, will deaden the nerve

lord, to be like you
and forgive for what they do
defeathered and skinned
soul bared from within

thin skin or no skin
what matters most
is what's within
close to the bone
the marrow of the matter

© Goode Guy 2011-09-09


Details | Free verse | |

Immunity (to weak)

I feel as if I have become sick
an ailment that was previously
an impossibility, what has happened
to my immunity
to my immortality
its as if all I have known to be
suddenly is not what it was,
so where did my immunity go,
immunity to sickness and stress
to love and lust?
it seems they have blown away
with the cooling air
all though I am sick I must
continue, continue to climb to
the top of the highest hills
and remember to breathe
when breathing becomes so
hard to do, to live when love is
near or far from reach,
to crawl when I am to weak to stand
...so be strong, I am with you
and we are strong...
TOGEATHER


Details | Free verse | |

Last sighting

Still searching we walk to edge of tide
To where waters tickle the toes 
At different edge each night
Here you were last seen
That dreadful night
Disappearing

Washed away with tidal sands and seas
Your mind tormented with unease
Released by natures blessing
As each wave comes over
Fleeting moments lost
As older things
remembered

Your footprints gone only whispers remain
Your life we shared and loved, we cared
Left to us are solemn memories
Of many days gone by
And still we try 
To find your
Lonely soul
Lost

And so the seaside weathers gently call
And seagulls cry around rocky shore
Last sighting of you was walking
In the sand one misty morning
And although not one print 
Was  left for us to find
There is some peace
From knowing that
You were smiling


Details | Free verse | |

Terri, The Pope, and I

I pray Almighty,
my freakazoid parents
the self-proclaimed-pulpits
of puritanical pious
and pompous selfish
keep their cult like claws
away from my throat,
and respect my 
sanctimonious death wish.
Otherwise, I may have to kill them.
Or at least break their hearts.

I am with that crazy ass Pope.
Let them pull the plug!
Draft me not for life support
puncutated by agonizing bedsores.

And Heaven forbid,
please keep me from them 
dragging my fragile bones
disgracefully through the courts
and turning my private slip
into a public script.
Please, please, please,
I pray they leave
my morphine shell alone.
Let me sleep
in sweet psychodelic dreams.
Let me sleep in peace.
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

THE ENNUI OF THE LOST

Ennui conspires insipid moods
infringing human awareness,
ruled by a lunatic vision,
not controlled by insight and lucidity;
and a desire for a Dolce Vita
mollifies a false illusion
to appear on an intaglio, to gradually
become a shining insignia.


To steer a ship, takes effort and patience,
and if its course is guided by favorable winds,
all is well for the adventurous captain;
and should he lose focus, lured by lunacy and nihilism,
his enthusiasm wears off and failure sets in...
and his ship will lurch on unfriendly waves,
and his ennui deprives him of courage to deviate
from the safe route when nocturnal vision is lost indeed.


Ennui insinuates myopia,
muzzling the voice and halting 
the mind's performance,
thus forging the promise of utopia; 
and the hunch is to pursue intuition
whenever it may lead...being
the holster controlling the steed,
getting rid of the humdrum and huff,
humming and ignoring the hourglass,
which trickles the sand to infuse fear.
    


Details | Free verse | |

self destruct

Oh so rapidly everything slips through your fingertips
Things so out of reach 
One moment you have it all
The next you just don't 
One second you're doing just fine
The next you're spinning into oblivion
One moment you have control
The next it's all lost 
Weeks pass, you still don't know the day 
You're on self destruct mode
There's no panic button
Just the self destruct
Oh so tempting. 
I'll just leave your hand hoovering.


Details | Free verse | |

When I'm old

As we sat in silence,
in a room so dark and cold; 
a thought began to bother me,
and you weren't there for me to hold.

My skin began to sag,
my vision began to fade;
my thin hairline was barely there,
and I couldn't recognize my own face.

Bags under my eyes,
drooping under my chin;
wrinkles stretched from ear to ear,
and I could hardly spark a grin.

My arms were aged and underneath they hang,
there were calluses on my feet;
my legs were barley steady,
and time had damaged my speech.

My weight was hard on my knees,
I couldn't hear worth a lick;
I underestimated my cancer,
ignored it and became very sick.

Now I'm here in this hospital,
lying on this death stricken bed,
taking in my final breaths;
and I want you to hold my hand.

Look into my glossy eyes,
as my fragile skin becomes stiff and cold;
Remember the way we felt when we were young,
now I know for sure that you still love me when I'm old.


Details | Free verse | |

Death's revolving door

Always meeting death with clean honesty
Fertilizing the fallen with holy hollow
Give up your guns and lines in the sand
Take these drums, remember well
We extend from ourselves
What we see from inside


Details | Free verse | |

Electric Lies

Sore testicles
isopropyl never dried
pan to the head
thank the splatter web
for the psychosis of this muse
vopour transmission
liars for friends
come one come all
come again
double fudged sunday
Electric lies
how was i to know the chemistry underneath all the stains
why should i bother to try
all of their unsolicited advice never once worked out right
online cult
what mask do you hide behind
wooly wolf at the hairdressers begins to sweat
waiting in line
one by one
taking my power back
a tactic of blind leading the blind

Devil's massage called exercise
routines to look good
but why should i try?
thankless for all your advice
the headaches for the consumption of vapours
realisation of liars for friends
future lovers ill dignified
nevermind what chemical counteracts with what substance
to throw it all down the drain
waste all your money on necisary tools
to wash the opiates your after down the drain
to chase the goose chase of a dollar
doesnt matter where it started
i did everything they told me
sparkled and shined
removed the love
tore it out
perfect lies
to sell the perfect drug
chemical warfare solved
with the perfect lie
of chemistry not physics
waste of time and money
just to make more
try it out on me first
life in danger
heir to the throne
to error is human
chemical warfare
dangerzone

Electric lies of your champagne
superstitious voodoo
of the astral plane
couldnt speak up
or point you in the wrong way
back breaking tear jerker
cult of bad advice
devil's massage
why bother to exercise
broken nose
hair falling out
schitso effective paranoia
mood disorder all your fault
took your advice of how to walk this tight rope
told you i was new to this
like lifting a curse of watching the trainwreck
for the april fool of me you were involved
broken hearted on the bridge of medicine
i dont care at all
testicles in the shape of my heart
they throb and throb
this type of rain
never stops
back breaking pain
from your routine of exercise
i don't trust you
don't understand you
your utopia of heavens you sold me
was an insult
your consequence for laughing
is a joke you will never live to tell
for the dead men walking with bloated bellies soar
self sufficient
at running in tight circles of familiar mistakes
push the same envelope in similar circles
the same pain to repeat
the same reason
the same lesson
same scape goat
same angel falls


Details | Free verse | |

Prayer for John Henry 1554

Father, we pray for those who are fighting ALS.
Lou Gehrig’s disease benched New York Yankee’s
First base player with over 2,130 consecutive games.
For those who are fighting ALS, Father, we pray,
We pray especially for John Henry’s healing.

Father look upon the 30,000 plus who are suffering.
Rilutek (Riluzole) is a drug with modest effects,
Myotrophin may slow some ALS progressions too.
The 30,000 plus who are suffering, Father, look upon,
We pray especially for John Henry’s healing.

Father, in 1874 Dr. Jean Charcot identified ALS.
Its cause is a mystery; revile it, and cure it we pray.
Glutamate in the brain has been examined as a cause.
Dr. Jean Charcot identified ALS, Father, in 1874,
We pray especially for John Henry’s healing.

Father, look upon physicians working for a cure.
Some say Neurotropic growth will stimulate cells,
Prevent further injury to neurons by free radicals.
Physicians working for a cure, Father, look upon,
We pray especially for John Henry’s healing.

Father, strengthens John Henry’s nutritional health.
Improve his muscles, strength, and mental support
Bless Cal Ripkin and John Hopkins for their help.
John Henry’s nutritional health, Father, strengthen,
We pray especially for your miraculous healing.

Dear Lord, hear our prayer, Amen!



Comments:  Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS) is a progressive disease of the 
Central Nervous System.  John Henry is fighting this ailment.  Let’s join in prayer 
for a cure for this disease.  Janmp has issued a challenge for poems.  God 
bless each of you always.







Details | Free verse | |

I'm Reaching

draw me closer to the shining light
I am stuck in a sticky blackened mess
of bitter regrets
you are the hope in my eyes
the warm fire in a far distance
I'm reaching for comfort
I'm reaching for peace
Some strange wind has swept my bearings
And I slip into uncertainty's mire
Mustering in helplessness
I find no glory upon this test
draw me closer to that dimming light
I'm afraid to lose my sight
There is nothing that I can control
but give up my hold


Details | Free verse | |

Donnas' Dilemma

My friend is in trouble and I
Don't know what she needs
She won't say in fact
She hardly says anything
That I haven't pulled out of her
Like pulling a barge upstream
In a dark and rancid sea
So I ask about her
Pharmacology situation for
Lack of knowing what else there is
To be concerned about and she says
The side effects are too much
She's tired of it and
That's that
I try to encourage my friend
With only good thoughts
But I'm not too convincing
Because I am also in a 
Pharmacology situation and
That's that


Details | Free verse | |

The Ledge of Life

Where is it that 
the rivers all flow 
and pool 
with inculpable 
eloquence?

Tell me where
the rain falls 
and 
washes
the guilt 
sodden avenues
of my existence
clean.

Where are the
magnificent
mountains 
that tower above
the pain 
and 
sickness
that have 
cast shadows 
over my 
years?

There is a place 
where the flowers 
bloom with
such
radiance 
and grandeur
from the soil 
enriched 
with 
my laments.

I stand on 
this ledge
waiting
for the 
wind
to take me 
there,
when I may
free myself 
from hell
and unburden
the world of my
encumbering 
shell.


Details | Free verse | |

Cracked Lips

When you lie at home all day
Watch yourself a waste away
Watching TV shows again and again
Think of places I might've been 
Covered with a blanket, lying in bed
Sweat matting the hair to my head
Can't find a position that seems right
There is no way for me to sleep at night
Gut wrenching cough, eyes bloodshot
My head is spinning with every thought
Thermometer hanging out from my lips
I drink water in small little sips
The curtains are closed, the room is black
I falling down this steady track
Lips are cracked, mouth is dry
I feel as if I'm going to die
I put it on my tongue, the orange pill
And swallow slowly, hoping this illness it will kill
Now I stare, my eyes without a spark
And now these eyelids close, and I am surrounded by dark...


Details | Free verse | |

on nosebleeds

That palm-smeared red flower
blossoming down your fingers;
reminding you of when tying shoelaces 
was an accomplishment.
When falling down wasn't a blessure,
but a scrap
- a prize worthy of adhesive
and swift kiss.

It is the instinct to lean back
and (*) give yourself an aneurysm.

*swallow; to take back what was once yours.


Details | Free verse | |

THE UNHEARD CRY

Listen to the built-in
Meaning-making-murmur.
In the deepest recess
Of your inner being
In the subtlest string
Of the music within
There is a small
There is a still
There a powerful inner voice
Crying out  for meaning
The cry is loud enough
To be heard all around
Please, read my eyes
Please, listen to my heart
Please, see the obvious signs
From my slightest sighs
The cry for meaning is boundless
The cry for meaning is timeless
The cry for meaning universal
The cry for meaning is personal


Details | Free verse | |

Salt Water Cure..

Have you ever noticed how healthy you feel
after a swim in the ocean?
Would salt dissolved in warm water have the
same effect?
Table salt and warm water prevent infections.
Applied to open wounds and gashes on pets
It may sting eg. "Like adding salt to a wound"
Would a gargle prevent a cold?


Details | Free verse | |

Cigarette Man

Just another day waking up to a cold empty house
The breath dragging deep outta my lungs
I walk outside and light up the morning's cigarette
Breathing in the smoke deep deep in my lungs

Emptyness as far as I can see against the shining sun
And brillant blue of the morning sky
But inside the gray clouds and storms brew, roll
Prayer that goes on don't let anyone see inside my heart

(This is a writing by my grandson who lives with me.)


Details | Free verse | |