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Free Verse Forgiveness Poems | Free Verse Poems About Forgiveness

These Free Verse Forgiveness poems are examples of Free Verse poems about Forgiveness. These are the best examples of Free Verse Forgiveness poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Free verse | |

Paranoid love

Tell me that this fear is just paranoia in my mind, 
we're not straining, we're not struggling, 
we're not sinking, we're just fine. 
I'm not perfect my dearest, but damn have I tried, 
and I'll try harder but I know I'll have the same results every time. 
Do you want me all the ways that I am? 
With all the struggles and the tears and the clinging to your hand. 
I fear your getting further and Im left on the shore to stand, 
watching you in the distance with a bullet in my hand. 
Tell me all this worry, its just clutter in my mind, 
tell me not to worry that we're doing just fine. 
Cause Im scared to run you off and I feel Im falling deep. 
And Im so frightened of these thoughts that its getting hard to sleep.
All I know is that the heart wants what it desires, 
because of you the match inside has turned into a fire. 
And I feel the broken glass thats sticking from my skin, 
Wondering if you'll remove the pain or push it back in. 
My hearts frantic wondering if you feel the same, 
pleading and begging for more than just a saying, 
but to feel and to see that im not alone, 
with being in this love thats overwhelming. 
Once I told you that we didnt have a spark, 
but you were lighting up and I was sitting in the dark. 
And this fire, this blaze its wrapped in desire. 
Im terrified to lose you, I think I might die or, 
maybe disappear from all the pieces falling out, 
im going crazy but when i open my mouth, nothing comes out, 
and I cant explain to you why I just need to hold you close, 
why every time you leave Im scared to let you go, 
why these tears are building up behind my eyes, 
all I know is that the heart wants what it desires 
and it desires to be your wife. 
So tell me in my panic, that your words are true, 
tell my my dearest what I mean to you, 
tell me that this paranoia is all within my mind 
we're not struggling, we're not sinking tell me we're just fine


Details | Free verse | |

Dead Birds

Standing on the broken cement of the back porch
silently staring into the skies
and talking to myself 
 
Fingers struggling to keep appearances 
windshield wipers across my cheek
watercolors gone white
 
Flippant, fanatical, furious
patient, protective, passionate
trying to love the beast
 
Sending dreams to the clean ears of the open air  
returned quickly, clutched in your mouth, crushed
presented for reward
 
Dead birds delivered to my doorstep 
my nature wants to heal them, bury them
yours waits and wags its tail


Details | Free verse | |

For Lion Hearts Only

You're The One I think of the most.You know and carry unconditional love.You have experienced the pains of pains.When You're not in My presence to walk with Me;My mind carries You and holds You deep in thought.The pureness that grows from Good devours The Evil...The walls of Your Heart fall down and open into fields No One Else can possible reach,love,know,or roam.The Wisdom of Your Fields develop and rules Valleys.Valleys expand  into Vast Kingdoms filled with Knowledge,Power,and Intelligence.Across The Horizon lies The Kingdom of Heaven in boundaries of grey only a Lion Heart can visualize.The Strength of a Castle is built by Your Own two hands held by Fate.Only a Lion Heart has the keys to open the doors and the ability to cross through the rooms furnished with Destiny untold.A candle is lit.You pace the rhythm with a steady beat.Your Heart restores The Eternal Light with-in.Truth becomes factual.The Freest of Facts unfold into Beautiful Gardens. Among The Gardens indescribable Rays of Hope appear with Faith as Your Spirit.Your Spirit became The Reality of Freedom enhanced by Courage.The Courage of A Lion Heart that holds Forgiveness for All.Could it be possible that You have A Lion Heart? Respect,Understanding,Love;that is Everlasting Serenity. I often wonder where this comes from as an Orion of ringing appears undetectable in Ones Ears... The Lion roars and The Angels sing softly with-in.May Your Gift of Acceptance Shine-On...From A Creator;to an Angel,better yet A Lion Heart.Walk among The Winners just for Today... 
                                  By Charlene L. Wilcox      10-13-2014


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness

Forgive me my love for the hurtful words
I hurled from my mouth time and time again
Forgive me for letting you down
for in your time of need I was never around
Forgive me for the long nights 
for all the constant fights
Forgive me for the innoncence I took away
for all the help I kept at bay
And lastly forgive me for being anything other than
a loving and caring husband


Details | Free verse | |

Through the Door

Can you see them run to me – arms wide and laughing,
calling me, Mama: keeper of the stars, moon and hearts?
Can you see them kiss away my pain, healing every hurt
that’s ever marked me broken, dead or dying?

Can you see them hurt me? When they curse me, flay me; 
ground me with their unformed anger and bravado-uncertainty
until they fly behind doors, crying over what they’ve said – 
wishing they could take it back? 

O’, does that pride HURT! 
It stabs the chest and holds…holds…holds.
Can you see them behind doors and feel their wishful hearts burn? 
Can you feel them loving me through it all?
Love is not something easily hidden. Love like that breaks down doors – 
                                    sees through them. 
Can you see my tears; feel the weight of them on your cheeks? 
They are yours. 
Where you are (past the furthest/closest door) can you see me in them? 
Can you see the love I kept hidden in my dark and painful dungeon? 
You never knew what he did to me – but deep down, I blamed you anyway. 
There was only you left, you see; always you.
Can you see, I'm just like you?

If you can see me, you know. 
And if you can hear me crying through this God Damned pen (all those notes – 
all those written sorry’s slipped beneath doors - you must have known that
even at 37, I’d write you my heart in a note!)

You, Gran/Mother, are my one and only regret. 
That for 7 years, I treated you like a burden, a bother, and a barrier. 
I treated you like you should have treated me – an unintentional intruder;
like something taken, not given. 
But worse than that, I treated you like an acquaintance. 
Knowing how badly that must have hurt you, makes me want to be kicked in the face 
until I am unrecognizable; to the rest of the world, and myself. 

But life’s not like that, is it? No. You knew that, too. 

My baby boy has your nose, ears, and eyes. 
Do you think that if I whisper in his ear tonight while he sleeps (between you and me – 
at the doorway), you could hear me?
Tonight, I will whisper love in his perfect ear (pressed up against heaven’s door) -
maybe you will hear me say,

“Indy…Gran, I’m so sorry. If you can hear me, please give me a sign so I will know 
you’ve heard me. I want to see you smile again – just one more time…please…
let me know that somewhere, behind the door, you forgive me…”

And in the darkness of his bedroom; the moonlight covering his small face
like an angel’s kiss, the baby boy in her likeness, smiled.


Details | Free verse | |

When He Smiles

The sun shines again for he smiles. The indeterminable day no longer flees or hides for its end is sought, as is its beginning for he smiles. Confusion though abiding must wait the laggard servant scolded by the Mistress Aphrodite for he smiles. Want must find a different dwelling for the moment un-housed by sweetest joy for he smiles. The sun shines again.


Details | Free verse | |

The Canvas

She painted her emotions with a dark brush
My heart sunk into her canvas
Transported to an endless sadness
She greets me there with a smile
Her light not visable from the other side

"Come" she says
"There are many rooms to explore"
She skips along yesterday's corridors
I follow in tentative foot falls
She looks back, "Here it is, this is where we'll begin."
Through the door we go in

In an instant she disappears
I wondered was she ever here
Then a silent voice whispers in my ear
"Watch and listen, all will unfold"
I watch in silence, my heart feels cold

A mother in a hospital bed
Two baby girls
One of them dead
Tears of joy now sad instead
She whispers "do you see?? Happy Birthday, little me." 

I hear her giggle in another room
So I walk through another door,
a toddler alone on the floor
Mom sitting, at a table with a drink
Little girl starts crying
Mom doesn't even blink

The scene changes 
A parade of men
Mom needs her lovers
Over and over again

In the night
When mom's asleep
Into the girls room, the demons creep
On the bed, there she lays
She leaves her mind
While the bad man plays

I scream
I want him to stop
Her so helpless
Him there on top
The whisper returns "There is nothing to do,
I want you to know the source of my blue."

I say "please I can take no more"
With that she says "there is just one more door."
She is back, she takes my hand
I walk through a door to her promised land

The darkness, is all stripped away
She is young once more, it's bright as day
She turns and smiles, " I'm okay,
long ago I learned to pray."
I said "I do not understand, 
how could he let that happen to you?
Is he not to blame for your world of blue?"
She looks again with knowing smile
"You will understand in a while.
One day all anwers he will reveal, 
best understood when you learn to kneel.

From her canvas 
My mind wishes release
Flowing into my heart, an ancient peace
On humbled footsteps, my journey within
A world of shadows, paper thin
I see beyond sadness
I search within 

This dark picture, 
brushed stroked on my mind
Her life touched by sin, 
Is now redefined
No longer is she broken
I watch her light grow
She says "I'm okay,
it's time for you to go."

For Kelly Deschler's Ghost stories contest.


















Details | Free verse | |

Aboriginal Sin

We made arrows from feather and bone
before burning down our homes,
our footsteps slinking 
over undulating, snow-covered hills.
____

The animals residing inside my head
follow me into the forest
where I cross streams to lose my scent.

Bugles blare in the distance,
but at my feet, the hounds lay open,
bleeding-out in morning's fresh snowfall.

These moments invoke an original sin.
I could fell a million men with the softest of blossoms -
slay a million men with a gentle, whispered caress.

And so I pray for my hate to be replaced by grace,

since you are the other half of my heart and hearth,
since you are also a victim to the plague,
it's all I can do, to atone for my Aboriginal sin.




~(2013 Halfling Remix)~
January 22nd, 2013


*Dedicated to Singing Rain: May your sacred arrows always fly true




.


Details | Free verse | |

Hey you

Hey you

Hey you, yes you standing there
Are you ashamed?
Are you afraid?
Do you even care?

Hey you, yes you, stop right there
I heard it all
I saw you there
Oh, how I wish I did not care

Hey you, yes you, don’t look over there
It’s you, you’re the one I’m talking to
You know me, yes you do
I sit above, high above your head.

I am your conscience
And as your conscience I cried
I cried for the barmaid that you had raped
I cried for the young girl you terribly insulted.

Hey you, yep I have your attention now
You see the barmaid, yes you have been reported
The young girl, hung herself last night
She died hanging on a rope.

Hey you, Yep now I have your attention
Do you care now?
Are you scared now?
Hey you, behind those bars, I am your conscience.

Lisa Duggan 17 August 2014.


 



Details | Free verse | |

My Secret

Each night
i put my hands together 
confessing the days mistakes
and to wipe the slate clean
its by my faith you say im forgiven
but still...
i continue to be a sinning machine

I keep you locked up deep inside
hidden
so i dont give myself away
to blend in
i hide you from everyone i know
they have no clue i pray
but why am i afraid to show my true self
forced into playing their games
is it because of the ridicule that would follow
would they even call me names?

its amazing
the transformation that takes hold
when my sinners "gameface" goes on
the lying and profanity gently flows
from the river of my mouth
but deep down
it's really just a con
i try hard to do and say the right things
so you wont be disapointed in me
but its so difficult for me to say " Darn-it "
rather than another word i could pick
from my vocabulary!
 
but thats what makes you all loving and true
you understand that we are not without sin
your love for mankind has always been there
we just have to let you in

Each night
i put my hands together
and ask for the courage
to unlock you
from a place deep within
each night




Details | Free verse | |

A Palindrome called Temptation

A Palindrome, also called Mirrored Poetry, is a poetry type not listed, so I put it under Free Verse.  If anyone finds a better categoy for this please let me know.  Thomas
______________________________________________________________________

Temptation

Temptation
And porn replaced love
Day after day
We are bombarded
Sex and beauty
Objects over heart
Thoughts lustful, confused reality
Isolation supplanted communication
Clouds out move clarity
Facade my life
~Redemption~
Life my facade
Clarity move out clouds
Communication supplanted isolation
Reality confused lustful thoughts
Heart over objects
Beauty and sex
Bombarded are we
Day after day
Love replaced porn and
Temptation


Details | Free verse | |

Eve

Does the past really matter?
 Does it set you free? 
I’m absorbed in the sin,
That is surrounding him and me. 

Lost in the curiosity,
Cold to the touch. 
Drenched in the poison,
With my dignity in his clutch.

Feeling like I was cheated;
I chose the evil instead of light.
I traded in the sunshine,
For what lurks in the night. 

I disobeyed his orders,
I gave up security to be unsure.
I went against the warnings,
Gave into darkness instead of remaining pure.

Once my bed was made of soft grass,
But now it is made of stone.
Was plump from all of the luscious fruit,
Now I’m starving to the bone. 

My curse is one of circumstance.
The punishment a crime,
I’m stuck inside this dampened cave,
For the rest of time. 
My world came crashing down,
The grief has not subsided.
My heart broke completely,
When my sons collided. 

My misery a token,
From the abandonment I earned.
Upon the time spent in sorrow,
There was a lesson to be learned.

Have I found the moral?
Only in time we shall see,
For all I did was eat an apple-
From the Knowledge tree. 


Details | Free verse | |

The Day That Died Forever

When I am Colder,Older and then alone...
I will collect the sky on my own...
When the art has faded and the days then fade-
when everyone has gone away...

I may finally see what never was saw
.....ahhhhhhhhhhhhh............... the quiet sky

The unlit room which bares my end...shows the flashes of my pains my joys and sins.
This life has been a strange one since the curtains were drawn
These paper and plastic figures have clouded the dawn

I was once younger,foolish,and obsessed with truth
Now I am bitter,sour,dour faced with my heart under shoe

The children were all searching or lost in a crowd
All weeds in a garden...growing vile and foul

Though beauty was sold it never came true
Obsessions and vanity have traveled safe through

Materials and poison and everything lost
have been burned in the fires or lost in the frost

I stand face to mirror tearing my being apart
Winding thoughts of love,pain,god,and art

As the sun sets and the darkness grows
I too shall follow this pattern in tow

Death has a friendly hand and a pretty face
She has given me comfort as I leave this place

The wars have occurred,humanity's lost
Souls have been burnt in the fire or lost in the frost

Day was Life,Night is Death

And the latter has given counsel on my final steps


Details | Free verse | |

Can You Hear Me?

I never talk to you as much as I should
Just to say thank you for all of your gifts
I take for granted all that you’ve given to me
Sometimes blaming you for all I have missed
And when you come to me I shy away
Feigning I can’t see you or hear you
But no matter where I look you’re around me
In every vivid color and shape of movement
You voice beckoning in all the worldly sounds
I even try to hide myself away from you
Still you find me wherever I go without effort
Cruel and hard or ignorant and fleeting
I’ve been both and you lovingly embrace me
Cursing you at the losses washed upon me
Your hand generously gives without prejudice
Gluttonously taking much more than my fill
When I look back you’ve again filled my cup
All the mistakes I have made and will make
Many of them knowingly and willingly
Still you offer all of your forgiveness
If only I will ask as a son should his father
I’ve broken so many of your rules a multitude of times
Deceiving myself believing you wouldn’t notice
Still you offer me everything you have
When I lay in the dark at night and examine
I hope and fear you and I doubt and pray
I hope you can hear me through all the other voices
Although I fear you don’t listen to me anymore
I force myself to doubt your existence
Knowing the truth unwilling to admit to it
I pray…Dear God…Can you hear me?


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Me

Dear Me,

I need you to be stronger
I need you to never be afraid

swallow your pride,and your flight will be softer
tell her you love her,even if it hurts

Grab onto your dream and live it
Do not be afraid of the sun's divinity

Be better,love more, hold on.

Dear Me,

Enjoy every stop of the ride.
For when the train finally stops...we die

Until we witness the angels dance after final day...
Dear Me, hide your fears away


Details | Free verse | |

Quote inspired by Justin

The key is to recognize, that we as instruments can only create music, if the breath of God blows through our lives.


Details | Free verse | |

IF EVER BECKONED BY THE BROKEN GLASS

If ever beckoned by the broken glass
I offer instantly these scarred hands
And bleed
	Embracing sharpest, cruel edges,
	most exquisite lines
And bleed
	upon piercing, jagged, penetrating points
	brilliant with dancing sunlight
And bleed
	poured out into a universe benign, hard surfaces
	warm in crimson puddles of all I was 
And stand
And bleed
And know then –
Broken glass does not love back.


Details | Free verse | |

Dementia

He was always so happy
strong and bold.
He'd give you the shirt off of his back.
Tough.
Independent.
He had a rough life
growing up through the depression,
but like he always does,
he got through it.
He has two boys, of whom he is so proud.
Moved from Regina, to Victoria.
He had the best life anyone his age could have wanted.
But ever since his wife died, 
he has not been the same.
Sad
Lonely
Empty.
But like he has always done,
he got through it.
Mind slipping, 
just a little forgetful.
That's how it always starts out...
But like always, he powered through it, 
until now...
He is not the same person that I used to know.
He been sentenced to the prison in his own mind.
Possessed by the thoughts of his dogs ashes.
He likes to play the blame game,
but we know he doesn't remember that it was him.
He wakes up in the night
shaking with pain, 
tears streaming down his face.
There is nothing we can do,
Oh well...
Two more tylenol.
Hold on to hope
for as long as you can,
It's only a matter of time now.
He gets vocal, a very loud tone.
He'll block you in your room
and make false accusations
But we know that it's the pain induced monster in him.
Tick tock, tick tock...
You can't handle the stress anymore
you have to leave.
Just hope for the best, 
maybe it will get better.
Surprise, it doesn't.
Your denial is foolish, everyone knows 
what happens next.
Sedation
Medication
Anger
Hurt
All results of
dementia


Details | Free verse | |

I Do Believe

"I Do Believe" 

The purpose of LIFE is to {Living In Faith Ever} 
to enrich God within us 
to an optimum level 
so that We as Humans 
can be guided by God 
to fuel out brothers and sisters 
with the same driving force 
to connect with the living God, 
to His existence and 
to See the Invisible, 
Believe the Incredible, and 
to Receive the Impossible 
to our everlasting journey 
to Heaven.

Rev. Samuel Mack
Copyright 2013

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Free verse | |

Together In Love




      This is our season, we still are one,

our time together, under the sun.

  Im sorry again, i have done wrong,

how many times, the nights were long.

  To stay with me, after what i have done,

i will never know why, you just didn't run.

  I dont understand, your faithful heart,

or not wanting to make, a brand new start.

  You said it hurt, and left the room,

could i explain, the scent of perfume.

  I try to change, but in some way,

you kept me close, not letting me stray.

  You took my life, forever in yours,

wanting me to know, it's loving shores.

  Somehow you knew, the future was set,

together in love, as when we met.


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Your King

A burst of white light gamma rays, overbearing a flash of brilliance burns through to my soul everything is like hell the world starts to melt in the blink of an eye just the cold blackness of night I don't care if I am not again what I once was, for at this moment I am greater now than ever before I took the path between teetering, tight roping walking right up to my right divined in my unholy state I thought I told you I am your king still you sit there, hesitating I know you hate me what does that mean? I hate just about everything still I'm chosen I did not wish before now bow down to me refuse me no more for I shall always be your demon until you accept me as your King. I don't even know you though you say we used to be best of friends, you and me the day you ditched me I remember now exactly how it played out back when we were just tiny things even back then I still was King you thought me stupid just a ruse I would laugh inside, you see? not one of you single, mean people ever even knew me in a world, mostly seen to me that is why only I can be your true King and bring forth a new source of light everlasting. As two worlds collide slowly aligned one wrapped in shadows one bathed in white evils swirling in the clouds above I'll always be the king you love to hate or despise as in your blood I thought I told you, I am the one I am the way, the way out shall be shown breathe in my spirit as it carries you away breathe in my faith it shall carry your empty space and deposit you gently on a cloud just enough higher than you've ever dreamed of for I am king now, and your in my hell your in my imagination, I'll just never tell you'll feel as though dreaming, you'll feel now if you try and see you were always found the most shared in the light cast upon me the last bright star in heaven. Denounce my name, if you may One year later, still not afraid A black sheep, a darkened spade That's just life, I'm not right I'm in the wrong, follow along Like a piper, I'll pitch a song Mesmerized, the weak wills sing I thought he told you, he's still our king.


Details | Free verse | |

Your pain

Your pain Why do I feel your pain still When I left of my own free will My mind is heavy with the burdens you build Yet my heart is still tender And vulnerable to your every will When you’re hurting and making bad choices Your voice still touches my every emotion How is it that I still feel your pain Even when I have nothing left to gain Yes, I love you still But be with you, I never, ever will. You had my heart from the very start And slowly our love began to part Two became one, until one was none Off in separate ways for more than 365 days So how is it that to this day Your pain still finds its way Into my life and in my heart where it stays Lay


Details | Free verse | |

Sabbath Evening Rap Up sequence (2)

-continued from  "Sabbath Morning Rap".

..and so brethren,
We're lost in the lust of loving lies
Conceived and retrieved as alibies.
to woo what we would instead of should,
To deify deeds ordained to deny
that Jesus Christ was crucified,

For you and me and he and she,
He lived and loved and agonized,
to dis the devil and tear his ties
to the role of the soul in his hellish hole.

Cause the devil is real and that's the deal
So if hate is your food and your crude and lewd,
you're flirtin' with hurtin', you're comin' unglued.

The devil is there so ya better beware
You're struttin his stuff and doin' your share.
Take a look around before ya drown
in the fire of his fate and the heat of his hate.

But Christ is saying :
My Peace I leave, My Peace I give
to those that ask Me to help them live.
And if you don't believe I can show you the way'
open your heart so you can pray.
Ill give you a sign for you to define.
What do you say gotta do it today.

Now it's up to you, whatever you do.
Don't wait too long cause the chance'll be gone.
Amen, I say, Throw your pride away,
I want you Here ...with ME ...to Stay.
        


Details | Free verse | |

Embrace

   As i cry, my eyes are opened,
a memory of you, burns inside my soul.
   
   I drop to my knee's, your truth surrounds me,
for in my sorrow, again I am lost.

   My heart fills with your voice,
even through my silence.

   I stand again, to see your mercy,
to rise over, all that I am.

   The faith you gave me, is my only hope,
as it again, shines through my darkness.

   Your forgiveness, is my hearts song,
your spirit moves in me, as I lift my burdens.

   With your power from above, I can stand,
to be restored, your joy I find.

   I search my soul, for your peace,
finding forever, your unconditional love.

   Your blood is my shield, a blessing to me,
for I have done nothing, to deserve your grace.

   So I am thankful, my life is yours,
your words I cherish, your love I embrace.

   








Details | Free verse | |

Insight out

Inner sanctuary
envision harmony and mental clarity
focus on a journey of possibility
Meditate on transformation and 
awareness of inner state
peace and healing

Constructive thought
instruct your mind
to redirect the lost and struggling inner voice
Where you can’t see the wood for the trees 
under your nose is the path of freedom 
wholeness

Put aside perceived struggles
revitalize, relax, respond
to body, mind, heart and spirit
Intuition, introspection and spiritual renewal
bring about personal healing and
conscious awakening

Stillness of mind – concentration
Thoughts of the subconcious and subliminal
beyond all negativity 
away from all interuption
To allow time for self communication and
expression of inner self

Senses – awareness of scent, sight, sound, taste and touch
Healing hands of the medical profession or alternative therapy
ambiance, temperature, oils, music, sounds and 
sights of nature or universe
realisation comes in various form and shape 
causing us to feel life in fullest expression

Connecting – whispers of wind 
radiating everpresent warmth of sun
a blanket of love and light comforts consoles over and through the cosmos
rippling infinately through infinity outwards, onwards
connecting right back into where we are at right now 
unmoved unchanged and as we were

Wise – responsible courageous allowed to let go of need to be judgemental or 
be judged 
let go of controlling enable trust wisdom and humility
intelligence of knowing others
wisdom of knowing self
strength in mastering others
power to master oneself

Energy -breath, force, spirit, soul, God, universe – 
whatever – doesn’t matter how you refer to it on personal level 
energy, balance, light, sound, vibration, peace 
centered self – stillness – silent – eternal – 
to have enough is a richness in itself
accept appreciate and acknowledge oneself


Details | Free verse | |

A Letter To Him

You irritate me.
You touched your daughter.
Actually, you touch not just yours,
but God’s!
You sick and twisted man.

You try your hardest to get it in
But she knows better than to let you.
You detest what a father should be
and act like nothing happens after.
All this, you see, will just past away
is what you say.
But no, Memories last through time.
Who could forget what you did?
You sick and twisted man.

But one thing irritates me the most,
how this has affected her soul,
how this affected her outlook on life.
how this has been embedded in her,
making her feel like  a computer with a virus.
You sick and twisted man.

I want to do bad things to you,
like kill you,
or banish you to hell.
But, I have been taught “we also forgive us who sins against us”.
So I forgive you, and love on you as if you are me.
it is written “Love your neighbor as yourself”
and I will.
You lost and forgiven man.


Details | Free verse | |

The Beauty In Futility

Futility
my heart breathes its last breath
Embraces its own death
Ready to be reborn 
and made anew

Can’t live a lie
Refuse to “do”
and I’ll DIE....
Focus now on why I’ll live 
And never touch the sky. 

I have to forget you
I have to reject you 
But I will never love anyone 
like I loved you.....

I heard you whisper 
and you never knew it
I wiped the tears from your eyes 
But you couldn’t feel it

You’re lost and you’ll never find you
And neither will I 
And I’m so sorry--
but I’m NOT. 

I'll attempt to reset
Try to forget
But you know, I never will. 

Be my dirty little secret 
My very worst-kept secret 
Sweet, smooth, beautiful poison 
My infernal and endless attraction 
towards complete and utter self-destruction 

I fell in love with the devil
And it will take one heck of an angel
To save me from the likes of you....

My addiction 
my confusion
my nightmare
my dream never to come true

Oh, I’ll never forget the times
we never shared
I’ll never forget 
how you were never there

Always me, the stars, and tears
And I ask you,
what kind of life is THAT?

I have to face the facts 
I don’t know what happens now
but it happens without you. 

The stains will always be there
the scars will never fade
But the memory of you----
it HAS to. 

I could carry the torch forever
But it would only consume me
I can’t cry another tear for you
Or I’ll dry up completely

It doesn’t affect you
and you never deserved me

You’ll go on with your life, too
All, all alone
Because you’ll only ever be in love
with you. 


Details | Free verse | |

Hello, January, We Need To Talk

I've been waiting up late for you,
watching the clock like a featured film.
Suspense waits no longer.
Here you arrive at 12 am
with a firework's bang.
At this hour,
this is your greeting?
Hello, January,
we need to talk....
I haven't seen you in months,
and you come barging in.
You come on so strong,
but sometimes you can be so cold.
You let me down last time you were here,
like torrents of hail and snowy hills.
(sigh)
Snow can be fun, though,
and you did warm me up
with hot cocoa and a blanket.
Thanks for your reviving comforts.
What I'm trying to say is
that I've missed you,
and I forgive you.
I hope you can forgive
my past as well.
I'm sorry about my negative attitude
and my disorganization.
We should go on walks more
and eat healthy meals together.
I promise I'll be kinder,
and I'll try to appreciate
all the good you offer me.
Can we now start anew?


Details | Free verse | |

Carbon Monoxide (CO) Week 2: Carbon Cabrona

Smokeless inhales hurt.
I cough tar on my shirt.
As my black lungs breathe,
Shrilling exhales wheeze.

Cabrona
Falls me
Down to
My knees.

The nicotine cracks
My will.
My composure
Spills.

I want 
This.
I must 
Have this.

I sink
Into
The brink
Of madness.


Details | Free verse | |

Careless

I slept
full of hope and dreams
I awoke 
empty and forgotten
Careless as I was back then

Morning sounds
swirling in my ears
Pointless thoughts
filling my head

"She can."
but will she ever again
"She is."
though no longer for me

I stood
alone and stiff
I walked
slow and without purpose
Careless as I was back then

The smell of spring
mingled with sunshine
as the touch of day
warmed me no more

"I was."
but I threw it all away
"I did." 
though I do not know why

I hoped
for a day without me
I cried
where no one could see
Careless as I was back then

Was this longing
joyless and caretaking
awaiting its chance
to bring me home again

Or was I lost
forever here like a wounded angel
Despaired and angry
the evening came again

Without warning
Without love
Without consumption
Without her

"In her arms,"
I wondered as the sun slipped away
"would I feel whole again?"
my hurt had wasted another day

I laid down
empty and forgotten
I slept 
full of hope and dreams
Careless as I was back then


Details | Free verse | |

Bully

you pick on the innocent
pray on the weak
leave the unwanted in your dust
harming all in your path

they go home
bruised and beaten
filled with tears
a lump in their throats

still breathing
still a love in their hearts 
yet they have more strength
than you ever will 




Details | Free verse | |

All Regrets

All regrets, in every backward flashback
leave bitter tastes like remorseful morsels
  left drowning in your tear welled eyes
    each day was longer and lower
      lower and loathing
        exposed naked in clothing
           open and empty without your
              ....trusting

All regrets, in every backward flashback
chisel names on tombstone with unforgivable clarity
   leaving unbearable burials beneath these wretched feet
      reincarnated daily sleighing me repeatedly with growing fervor
         fervor and hate
            filthy face washed over in angst
              closed off from safety and salvation without your
                 ....understanding

All regrets, in every backward flashback
grimacing sneers returned in mirrors like evil staring contests
    every showdown lost in landslide fashion, reflection laughing
       devoured each hour as they slip by consuming
          consuming and draining
             worlds worth of words and deeds beyond explaining
                I'm only half as good and partially whole without your
                      ....forgiveness
  
               
   
   Inspired by Mr. Michael Jordan's "Untwisted" contest


Details | Free verse | |

A Journey of Souls

To touch another soul on this journey
To affirm the value of your fellowman
To walk in the shoes of a man that’s broken
Is to walk this earth with God

To wade through murky waters 
To be at peace amidst the storm
To believe that you are truly free                                             
Is to trust in the word of God

To love in spite of animosity
To fear no one, but to do wrong 
To rise up and walk each time you fall  
Is to be the apple of God’s eye
~*~


Details | Free verse | |

God is my Dad

I love my God, He is my Dad,
I didn't know Him when I was a lad.
Given a penny to take to church,
Spent the penny left God in the lurch.
Went through life doing no-one ill
Still not doing the Masters will.
Married had kids, all well and good,
Still no church but knowing I should.
Then came trouble, children rebelling,
Bills through the door threats compelling.
Future looks bleak, nowhere to turn,
Heading for hell, I don't want to burn.
Cried out to God, I need your help.
Sorry  for being an irreverent whelp.
God answered my call as only He could,
He said honour me, I said I would.
My life turned around, got better each day,
For the good things in life, I just pray.

© Dave Timperley 2012
 


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness 2




Forgiving others will give you peace,
All the pains will be a great release,
It will get rid of your emotional baggage,
It’s like wound that no need for a bandage.

I know it’s really hard to forgive and to forget,
And love turned into a broken relationship,
But who are we not to forgive others anyway?
If it means to cleanse our souls and be happy. 

Forgive yourself and forgive others, 
Let your soul woks and feel His presence, 
Just kneel down and ask God’s guidance,
He will reward you with peace in your heart.


June 30, 2013
For SKAT-OZ "Any Poem Under 15 Lines"
10th Place Winner


Details | Free verse | |

YOU BROKE ME

What makes me human is You
You who broke me and push me through
Yes,though You know I was not strong
You caused me to cry or so long
So many times I ask if You really exist
Though many times also You heard my pleas
I was so wrong to blame You for all my sadness
For truly it is You who brings gladness

So many times You tried to break me before
But I was so hard and rebelled more
Yet You never stopped breaking me
Coz You were concerned of what my future could be
You never wanted me to go the wrong way
That's why You wanted me to pray
So You could guide me everyday
Until into my bed i lay

From a frozen heart You broke me to become human
For my heart never melts though put under the sun
You changed my whole being
I was changed by the grace of Your loving
Because You care so much about me
You wanted me to live with you in heaven for eternity,
For the chance to be with You forever
YOU BROKE ME to become a person much better

Thank You Father or breaking me to a new person
I didn't understand at first for I didn't know the 
reason
Thank You for the tears that have poured out from
my eyes
Thank You for the sorrows that have made me cry
For now I know I'm a new being
Changed by the trials You have given.


Details | Free verse | |

Greatest news ever

Just landed in my ears
just dazzled my mind 
my local political head 
I was talking to him today
Lord you send such a beautiful messages to me
the past couple of days 
I suggested a gift from God
that his great light shone over me
In reverence to Our Most Holy Spirit
telling him my great news 
Now he has said 
that he will do everything in his power
To get me published wow stunned 
I was hearing hearing his pride in me
Its like coming out of a cave 
alone as a hermit in the mountains
Now I have found peace
In love everything shines so bright
Thank you Lord and master 
for showing me and helping me see 
to draw in your light
I even mentioned getting my lonely prayer
for Christmas donated to the church of granite 
In the shape of a crucifix 
whom my grandfather help build
A cross pointing to Heaven
Golden guilded to the house off God


Details | Free verse | |

Die alone and born again

The man with the plastic bug in his head
monopolized my dreams last night
in the place that the horsefly of my dignity
finally surrender to the impresario without a fight.

Seven days and 7 hours transplanted in my memorabilia
reminding the rustiness of the purple child
flatterers danced beneath the clouds of melancholy
and morality spreader the master plan inside my mind.

The disinheritance of my immortality the final day
discouraged my desire to see the forbidden love
restored my will to escape
manipulated the deep of the uncertainty above.

Released from the plastic bug in my head
try to cover my yellow child in the purple sky
laughing,singing,whispering,playing
seven days and seven hours before he dies.


Details | Free verse | |

The longest conversation

I forgot Him who stood by me all this time
Now with nothing left I go back to Him
And He soothes me with a soft hand
Strokes my hair tells me its all about to end
My pain  my guilt its Him who's left
He tells me its a choice I have to make
Death is always an option never self imposed
He told me He is not cruel, He loves me a lot
When I cry in the corner , He wipes my tears
Life might be unfair , but death is not
A new beginning is all what I want
He told me I have never let go of faith
Even when I sinned or betrayed
He sighed when I made mistakes
He smiled at the lessons learned
He looked at me when I looked away
He was there to talk when no one was
He saved me from so much that could have gone wrong
I drifted away , He brought me back
He showed me the way , when I was lost
He trusted me but I trusted no one
Now when I gave up He came to me again
I looked for everyone , never thought its Him
Asked Him , how did I find you?
He said I am amongst those pieces of your broken heart
I was shocked , you were here all this time?
Yes I was always in your beating heart
I felt the pain more than you did
Every time you cried, i was crying with you
Did they realize they stabbed me when they hurt this heart
It bleeds with my pain and some of yours
We are one maryam, all hearts combined
Man will never realize , its the same for all of us
You have to keep breaking your heart to discover me
You look astonished , is it hard to believe?
I replied , you dwell in the heart and I have hurt some too
Yes , I felt that more than they did boo
I am sorry , I don't know why you are still with me
Because I can't let you go , you are a part of me
He said , man is guilty but how soon he forgets
I love all , more than a mother who begets
You are scared of hell, is that why you pray?
The fire is more powerful, then the love I display?
You have been given free will to perceive
Fear of my brutality is not what I need
They think I'm unfair , ruthless and cruel
some scared to say , I know , I made you fool
You've made your own ways of getting close to me
Everyway I adore , I acknowledge everything you do
Universe is love , not some punishment and rules
Believe that I am, and the truth appears to you
If I wanted slaves, I would give you no will
Man is made to discover , man is made to choose
I listen and I watch , I never let you go
You are so dear to me,every unique soul
So its your decision now, come see more
Death is just the beginning of what you really are


Details | Free verse | |

Sailing Away

Cruising the Mediterranean
I don't wish to fight any more
I want to enjoy the sunset
On the sea I so adore

Please hold your tongue
In silence,
View the beauty all around,
Tend the sails with care
So we don't run aground

I'll make us Margaritas,
We'll dine in finest style
As our sloop carries us
Through many a sea mile

No fighting, please,
I beg you,
Let this be a sailing
in but total peace,
And anger and misunderstanding,
I pray that they do cease

So hold me as you did once,
No question of our love,
And watch the Albatross
As he flies off with the dove

The soothing sea to rock us,
As if babies in need of sleep
And the new memories we create
Forever shall we keep.


Details | Free verse | |

Moving On?

As the sun caresses the world
In her warm embrace to wake us,
	I held you.
Like a toddler boldly stepping forth
Into the wondrous adventure awaiting,
	I taught you.
Admirer, collector, connoisseur of the fine,
I found so much to admire in you,
	I appreciated you.
Eyes twinkling starlight, impish grin,
I learned much and you taught me to play,
	I grew with you.
The glow of life, a bundle of joy,
You gave me my dream of having a family,
	I was you.
Romeo was just a passing fling,
My love was King … none surpassed my strength,
	I loved you.
Days now are just empty minutes,
My new quest to find peace and move on,
	I forgive you.
Cheeks wet, heart heavy, spirit strong,
Mind firmly stuck on dusty, old Memory Lane,
	I miss you.


Details | Free verse | |

Healing a bleeding rose

A soul weeps in flesh for the pain I left behind.
 I am sorry for the pain,the tears, I left for you to bear. 
These healing words I send with a bumble bee to heal a bleeding rose. 
These napkin like words I pray can wipe your tears and snotty nose.
 I was young and naive,I cherished my pride instead of your heart . 
There the coldest winter did start. 
If it makes you happy I disposed of the mistress. 
Who faded in long lost memory of shadowed kisses.
 No,no,no I am sorry for writing that,
its a poets bold habit of honesty,
but in writing this I thought i should be honest and honest I shall be.I apologize for leaving your emotions suppressed,unknown and ostracized. 
Yes, I know the ocean swollen with your tears,the angels descended on a bloody battle field to  hear your cry.I hope you can summons them again and reconsider the report to the almighty farther. 
If I could write this apology in the eye of the sky I would,for my remorse to be seen , a once foolish human being .Your heart I didn't mean to decay. I apologize for the lies, cries,for making you eat sadly all those ice creams and soggy apple pies,from absorbing tears fallen from yours eyes. Left to wonder in the vastness of the universe alone. I am sorry also sorry for the smudged ink and some of the lines. I cried along with them, imaging your painful times.


Yours truly Elliott Bowe 
To:Simone Descartes


Details | Free verse | |

Secrets Revealed

The words drip from your lips
Like water from a faucet
The lies and fables 
Is screeching to unfold
The truth will set you free
If not in bondage you will be
So lift the veil on every secret and every lie
Your wings flap free
You will soar so high…


Details | Free verse | |

Blue Cotton Candy

Sometimes
life should be about
nothing more than
swirly upside down rides
and blue cotton candy
for in the end
pasts can’t be taken back
only relived
and the truth is
I’d rather live
happily
with my blue tongue
than die
with the past’s
bitter taste
on my lips.

8-8-09


Details | Free verse | |

Will You Come to Say Goodbye

when the last breath of life
is gone and my lips are as cold as the dog’s nose
when my friends gather 'round
for the farewell party
will you return with a smile to say 
goodbye

there will be flowers from those
who cry when I'm gone
and lots of tears from those I left in the world alone 
and I know some will have fun at the farewell party
but will you return with a smile to say 
goodbye

don't be mad at me for wanting your goodbye
and dying for the smile we shared 
this you need to know as true
when my life in this unfaithful world is through
I'll go away loving you still


Details | Free verse | |

A Child of God {Psalms 119:24)

Deal with your servant according to your love and teach me your decrees
And the Lord said unto me, “Rise above your own despair”
"Offer your soul unto me; I will free you of this Prison cell"
I ask Lord how can this be, “this cell is my home it is all I have left”
As suddenly as flowers bloom in the spring, I was free inside
The tears fell like two giant waterfalls cascading down my face
And the Lord ask of me, “Take pen in hand and seek what you desire”
From inside a Prison cell I was set free within; filled with the Holy Ghost
Page by page I started seeking the truth as fiery tongues filled my pages
Through the Lord a violent inmate was placed in a cell, by his grace
The man who walked out of that cell,” I am Poet, A child of God” 


This poem was written for Brian's contest


Details | Free verse | |

TAKING BACK LIFE WASN'T EASY

Once life slipped from my young days,
taking away all happiness;
it rained, but flowers didn't grow,
hope was as far as a rainbow...
deprivation and longing
made me shout at my ill fate
to stop its wrongdoing
before it turned to hate.


Yes, taking back life wasn't easy,
but what's left is mine to pursue...
to enjoy before my hour of death;
and I hope that it will continue  
without disrupting the harmony
between love and happy living:
'though lost time can't return,
the present is enough! 


Years have passed and generosity
has flourished in a loveless heart,
now, every friend notices how 
it loves them without resentment;
and they reflect over my words,
" Taking back life wasn't easy...
I fought hard and won
by making the right choices!" 


Details | Free verse | |

My Awakening

When the world is fast asleep not me, I think and think and think how can I be more unique more I think, and think and think how will they remember me? how can I change it, more differently? how can I push and challenge me? now that my mind is unlocked and free the new sun rises and startles me my trance is broken, my awakening The new dawn rises, surprises surprises thankful to the twin gods, Isis and Osiris for removing all the sins of my past lies that was bringing me down to my demise The balance, my chalice, now undisturbed its order is hanging by my good word I do not wish to go unheard but who is there to hear me when my thoughts are stirred? In a sense of peace drop to my knees look up to the heavens they're smiling down on me how can I repay them? what is my creed? I rise now awakened revived in my belief.


Details | Free verse | |

Palisades Park

A rodent in the road

Jammed into my  tires

As I screeched to a halt,

Then bolted past

Remembering a deer

In the headlights

A victim underneath me

Forever frozen in ice

And slow motioned into

Sleepwalking in my mind

An instant replay triggered

By any myriad of buttons

Pushed at random

An overheard conversation

At the dentist’s office

Sending x-ray recollections

Into forward play and 

Changing my breath and

My complexion as I relive

My murders,

Clawed forever into a brain

Those guilty priests cannot forgive

Even God has allowed me to allow the

Remnants to remain for now

Brushed against my heart

Like orange and purple sunsets

At Palisades Park.


Details | Free verse | |

Ocean Beyond The Stars

Through them one can see an ocean.

Her ocean.

It's there beyond.

Beyond the stars.

The stars in her eyes.

Upon her sea there are no boats.

If you wade too far, there is no hope
of rescue.

Still where her beaches are,
there's warm soft sand.
For her to walk.
Peaceful and calm.
Save the gentle breeze tickling her arm.
Save the calls of the sea gulls.

She holds some wet stones
cupped
in her left hand.
Shiny and sparkling.
But, not
always
beautiful.
Not always smooth
and soothing
to touch.

She contemplates each in turn.
Her collection.

Then
she gazes out upon the ocean and above it to the stars.
The stars beyond.

And so,
they are reflected there.
Forever reflected there
in her eyes.


Details | Free verse | |

Vital Faith

When I awoke and saw the dawn I sighed for thee
Yearnings ached within myself
Once I had that windfall of unimaginable strength
A strength that could only breathe where faith and beauty met
Here and now
In search of just a glimpse of my shadow
Transparent as the weeping tears of dew
I care not for the promises of this new born day
Nothing more than a child to me
Learning to walk, to speak
I asked the Lord to make me stronger
And as his reassuring presence moved within myself
As my mind was settled
My spirit soothed
Vital faith restored
When I awoke and saw the dawn I smiled for thee


Details | Free verse | |

TIME



If time heals all, what heals time?
For it cannot be changed, its burned into history, burned into the fabric of time like a scratch on a track.

Time can make us feel regret that we did not use it the best we could or it can make us rejoice remembering that good moment in time.

It is a fickle thing that most will not appreciate until it’s gone.

I myself have had more pain than good, but does that count as bad time as it made my character and is the reason I have this strength and insight on life. 

So I don’t believe in or good or bad moments in time, its all on how we look at it and use it going forward. 

The most important thing to remember and learn from the past is that we ALL make mistakes . .  but only a fool repeats them.

Yours Fraternally 

TIME


Details | Free verse | |

The Real Thing - To A Friend Of Mine

I've been held in suspence
Wondering if you'd break my rules
So I could repent
The Real thing is
Im a horrible friend
But If you can forgive me 
We can begin again
My Avitar - Thats the real me
I know many have been waiting to see
I use to hide away 
Locked behind closed doors
But I left that Jackass
And now, what can I say - Watch Out World
I use to go by a lonely name myself
The Lost Little Poet
Well, now shes found herself
Im risky and Ive got appeal
Im only 19 but I know whats real
Life is harsh, and every one needs a friend
Im not the best and I cant promise I wont leave again
But what do you say 
Lets give it a try
Be friends and write sonets in the sky
What do you think
I cant tell you much else
This is the real me
And Im ready to give the world hell


Details | Free verse | |

Thoughts

Oft do I feel I should censor my mind,
Spill the ink on the cloth that my words lay,
Snatched by the Raven 'fore I finish my thoughts,
Mistaken by others that read as a foray,
Naught do I mean to cause an attack,
My emotions doth escape without thought,
Unhappiness apparent they will say,
Though the truth is adverse to what they sought.


Details | Free verse | |

King

Cannibals gather,
for the feast of knowledge,
devouring themselves,
in games of fire & instinct.
In desperation,
lost kings search for the King,
anointed in love.
Shepard’s forked tongues,
breed wounded warriors.
Share me not in the
bounty of bitter roots,
and darkened dreams.
Cleanse me in Lamb’s blood.
Set me free. . .


Details | Free verse | |

Whispers in Church

Magnificent cathedral
Saints and sinners gather in
Word of God delivered 
To triumph over sin
Within the walls 
Between the pews
You hear the faintest cry
Whispers in the church house
In the sweet by and by

Quiet prayers 
Sent up to God
Repentance for the sin
Committed in the quiet night
Where no man wants to live
In hopes that God
Will grant a pardon
For acts of immortal sin
The best of intentions
Laid out in prayer
Amazing grace to win

Secretly hoping
God’s grace and mercy
Finds favor on your soul
Sending up promises
Acts of contrition
Heart’s willing to mourn
Is he still listening? 
Do you still wonder? 
Has he turned a deaf ear?
No answer is given 
While here on this earth
You’ll find out in the beginning


Details | Free verse | |

The Hurdles of Forgiveness

The Hurdles of Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a skill, a strength
because it is born out of character
and does not come easy.
It is a  mountain encountered on life’s road, 
a steep climb to condonation,
reaching the summit to find peace and healing 
waiting to embrace you.
Without forgiveness, there can be no peace.

Forgiveness is a choice, an attitude
which must be learned.
unlocking  chains of bitterness and resentment
allowing  the spirit to  soar free.
Forgiveness is a check, ripped in half
cashed only by the mind,
satisfying all debts.
It is the needle that mends the soul.

Forgiveness is love.


Details | Free verse | |

Oh, Baby

You haunt me, constantly
twisting my dreams into nightmares, and
nerve-racking my mind at the sight of pampers.
Approaching forty, mother of none:
why couldn’t I give birth to more than a hope?
Happily single, despite what you say, without
dealing with a kid who’ll only grow to hate me,
the crumb-snatcher taking from my plans and pay,
but....
I’m so damn lonely and you know it.
You,
you with your what-ifs and would’ve-could’ve-should’ves,
not allowing me to soundly sleep,
making me carry that weight,
with a life as empty as my womb,
tormented
by immoral choices that
stopped your possibilities.
I can only
now say:
“Mommy’s sorry.”


Details | Free verse | |

Elevators: 5 Horsemen

Part 1

Onion

the delicacy of friendship

I found you in the flowers
Standing tall we become one
Looking down from gangly towers
Squash, you burn, you pillage, son.

Follow me you say in tongues
Thy shallow mind reveal me tell
Whisper lies clean load the guns
I feel the burn I rot in hell

Friend folly menacing the liar
I loathe this coffin how it leaks
Dear foe you raped me set on fire
The onion peal itself and weeps

Part 2

Traitor

dear monkey boy

Older eyes eat themselves,
glance and kill the other
Unified in the dance,
they steer the musty rudder.

Pained and sweeter deeper wells,
poised buckets drunk with water.
Singled out the one that dried,
handed weights to pull him under.

Wiser times capture the mind,
death justifies dishonor.
Knife slice neat through the devil's back,
who stares blank and milks the udder.

Part 3

Tempest

patron saint

Inside this box
Goodbye tempestuous fall
My puppet of steel coiled thread
Smashed buttons and twisted dread,
Alarm these doors, and
Escape this delusive bunker bed

Stamp the spiders
Thief, vulture of the deflection
The mocking patron of the sinners
Erase this affliction
Relating inward at the reflection

Rise you fool

Part 4

Phoenix

i love you

close the grip
cinched hematic grip
drenched, clawing
seeking the sheave
becoming the counterweight

i absorb, now
extracting the heat
rise like a phoenix
away to be gone to be free
fix me! i have fixed me

i am alive and i love you

Part 5

Aye, Damager

Abolish her state of disrepair
Scattered, spattered drippy thoughts
All around this box of soused leaves
Soak, ferment in the faith of our love

I can't fix this, you know
I loathe this misunderstanding
Of what I am speaking, projecting
To me, Aye Damager, to you

This devil in me
turned and twisted
A wrecked elevator in rejection
Years locked painfully aware

...


Details | Free verse | |

i smile now

i think of the
miles
and
streets
i crossed
to bump into you
and
i smile now
because i realize
that until you lifted your head 
to see where you were going
you could never
see me coming


Details | Free verse | |

Compassions Goal

It is impossible to please........................................................................EVERYONE
like a Queen bee fat and almost legless trying to hold together her world she...DOES
not see for she can not move freely and her mind does................................NOT
focus on the abundant need of each to....................................................HAVE
for the many need sustenance................................................................TO
thrive, feeling the plight of.....................................................................LIKE
beings whose each task, small or large, deserve the same respect as do.........YOU


Details | Free verse | |

This is How I have Come to Fade!

This is how I come to fade!
oh baby I once loved you.
oh I once loved you!!

My heart is aching for you, now.

My love for you cries out!
it cries out!

oh oh this is the way you have made me.
This is the way I have come to fade.

Oh baby I once loved you.



Details | Free verse | |

Open Arms

My heart accepts your apology,
And welcomes you home again.
The love I share is warmer than the sun,
And I too, forgive you of your sins.

These open arms receive you,
I’m ready for the making up to embark.
Clutching you to my chest, I wont’ ever let go,
For these arms are the extensions of my heart.

Wrapping you up the whole night through,
As I whisper in your ear how much I love you.



_________________________
For Brian's "My Dear" Contest


Details | Free verse | |

Judge Not.

I still see her face .....on our wedding day
when love was blind.
Now I watch  the changing expressions
 flit accross a once radiant face.
Ones that make me sad.... though more often mad.
The deep grove on her brow caused by many a frown
her cold eyes when she looks at me
the chill of a winter's wind.
The way she dismisses my attempt  at talk 
rather she steps away ... an insolent walk. 
Fires rage within me...hate seeds start to grow
against  my soul mate......who once I loved so.
Where did I go wrong, what have I done,
a good man I am...a loving husband.
I give her everything........ nothing does she lack
yet she treats me like a dog....who's not even allowed to bark.
The day she left me...I searched for answers
I searched high and low
what I found left me bewildered so
for  the image my soul mirrored
was not me....could not be,
a frightful picture the one  I see.
Handsome and suave.... the outer garments I wore
sweet talk came easy to friends outdoors.
A devil at home ...a taste of gall.
Underneath it all was my image ....mirrored in
 the face I loved.
Had I but eyes to see within... I might have changed
but too blind I was .....too arrogant...too vain  to see
the  ugly  garments   the world could not see.
Unforgiving,  and condeming wretch  that I am,
 vindictive  and controlling too.
Ashamed  I am I must admit 
I have judged my love unfairly.....and lost it all
'twould  have been better..... never to have judged at all.


Details | Free verse | |

Loss for Eternity

in the distance i see you
and i call you back;
I WANT YOU BACK........
and you turn....

look at me
with a split-second
of for-EVER in your eyes

then...as you are
so good at doing
you use that 
devil i don't care
smile

and disappear
right there
in the crystal
swirling liquid 
of my tears

there is a whispering...
"i will wait....
yes, i will wait
next time."

by janetta


Details | Free verse | |

Joshua's Dilemma

What does it tell you
when a man sees the light,
but first the darkness.
It all fades away in time 
passing through the rough of a mind,
that is beautifully insane.
Only the one that is in it can get out 
of  the twilight of terror,
standing,
staring,
gazing,
waiting till the time 
to strike! 
I'm wondering 
if it's me 
or the spirit 
that has been chasing me,
to gain a soul 
that is not rightfully his,
insane as it is.


Details | Free verse | |

What they see

I wonder what they see...
When they look down at me...
I wonder do they know I feel...
That my emptiness is real.

I wonder if when I die...
Will the tears be real that they cry..?
I wonder if they know I cared...
I trampled my own heart better they faired.

I wonder if they knew the beatings 
were so they would have a dad...
Or that I loved them even when I got mad...
I wonder if they know I prayed...
As lifelessly my body laid.

I wonder if they will listen as the doctors say...
We had to keep her confidentiality to her dyeing day...
I wonder if they know I lived for them out of love...
I wonder if they'll realize I see those that live with god above...
He holds my hand when seizures come and take hold...
Afraid to die knowing to them, they felt I was oh so cold.


Details | Free verse | |

Fields of the Black Rose

Flowing fields of black 
Roses the hue of night 
Dark meadow take me home 
Relieve me of my fright 
And take me back. 
Blackened fields of ashy rose 
Take me to my home 
Where I'll never see the sun again 
Where I'll never hate 
And never bend 
Where we only see in shades of gray 
Where summer sun has shone its last 
And November wind is here to stay. 
Where I can go forget my past 
And never have to pay 
For the things I've done. 
Blackened fields of ashy rose 
Take me to your home 
Where we all see in shades of gray 
And I can rest in the coldly blowing wind. 
Forget my face forget my name 
Forget my form forget my sin 
Let me stay and waste away 
Please won't you take me in?


Details | Free verse | |

An Okie's Lament

Oh, America,
my beloved America.
The world owns your soul,
and chortles as catastrophe comes.

Bartered was your legacy,
for riotous living,
and pottage no longer gratifies
your innards cravings.

Terrorist lambaste your innocent,
and spread false doctrines.
Fear and anxiety hold you captive,
casting foreboding shadows o'er your land.

As a mongrel wallowing in its vomit,
so it is, you and your sin.
Having no vision of signet ring and fatted calf,
your robe now drapes a self righteous frame.

Has the line in the sand been crossed?
While your flag still flies, the eagle soars,
and your Statue of Liberty stands erect,
return unto the father.

Oh America,
my beloved America,
God loves thee more than I.


Details | Free verse | |

If I Forget

If I forget,
Remind me of your name
As it must have slipped away.

If I forget,
Show me a photo of my face
As it surely has changed.

If I forget,
Take my hand back to that place
For I've certainly lost my way.

If I forget,
Breathe a gentle breath in my ear
If will calm my fear and rekindle the flame.

If I forget,
Bring the heart straps
That held me to you like glue.

And if I forget,
Carry the memory of us
It is lost but a treasure on a raft on the waves...

TRS, 09/13/08


Details | Free verse | |

My Heart Will Go On!

M y heart was not perpaird for this!
Y ou caught me so off gaurd.

H ow could you leave my life, like there was never any love at all.
E very time I remember you, the pain contenues.
A fter all we have been through, you departed.
R ed roses you gave me, said you loved me.
T onight I cry for you.

W hat you have done for me, has opened my eyes. 
I will never forget this for it has been my life lesson.
L ook at me.
L ook at me, you have made me.

G od forbid this, but it is what is now.
O h how I want you back.

O ne day I might forgive you.
N ever will I stop loveing you.


Details | Free verse | |

Radiance

Radiance

A radiant being
descended upon
her old home
today,

The place where
she grew up –

---

Sunlight,
filtering through
slats
& faded window shades,

Brightens
& shines more clearly
as she passes,
bringing
contented purrs and stretches
to the aged
and bony cats
who lie aslumber
in the path
of the warming,
dappling rays

---

Dear Old Dog, quiet
for once,
wags her tail,
a friendly question
sparkling
in her tired, rheumy eyes,
her grey paws
dancing,
young again
for a shining, vaporous moment

(— Oh, yes, and I
like you too,
my very dear, I
like you, too! —)

---

This radiant being
brought contentment
to her birthplace
today,

& left it
brighter
than the stars

---

Dear Old Dog’s
asleep now,
wearing moonlit strips
and dreaming,

While the erstwhile slumberous
ancient cats
awake
to quest the night

And radiance

remains


Details | Free verse | |

Love

my life long dream has come true,

it doesnt seem at all like you.

youre different, 

not the same,

you put me through a lot of pain.

but im willing to try again, 

life is different now, than it was then. 

i realize how much love i felt for you 

and there is not much you can do.

i have tried so many times, in so many ways,

to say how much i love you 

but there is no other way. I

ve said it to you, 

ive told you how i felt, 

im not sure you believe me 

i dont see

i dont know, 

so how can i feel like this from the get go?

im happy just to be with you, 

and if it werent true, 

would i be with you?

the time shall fly, 

while we're together, 

i shall not do what i did, ever, 

again. 

because if it hurt me then 

it can hurt me now.

Im glad you missed me, 

it wasnt fun being free. 

i missed your hugs, your kisses, 

when i broke up with you,

an arrow dug into my heart. 

when we didnt speak, 

it tore me apart. 

i felt like i was weak. 

it broke my heart. 

i wish for it to never, 

happen, for if it does i wont be happy ever. 

so as i write this poem, 

i am openly expressing my hope,

my devotion, 

when we parted, the sorrow seemed sweet, 

i was broken hearted,

and i couldnt believe. 

the simpilist thing you said to me. 

i know you tried, and so did i.

in the end, we needed to part in order to realize 

what our hearts were saying, 

no need to sympathesize, 

because as i say i love you, 

i am hugely devoted to you

love is love, love is you, i love love love, so i love you


Details | Free verse | |

Seek Ye His Face

You! – Put the gun down!!!
Take it away from your head
Erase the thought from your mind
Overcome that worried state of mind
Get on your knees and raise your head
Call on God for help and salvation
Build up your faith and your strength
Seek help from the tip of your tongue
Rejuvenate and elevate into His flock
Seek, ask, and He shall grace you
Say it, believe, and He will touch you
Now walk with me and let’s fellowship!


Details | Free verse | |

The Dispersal

Ominous fear, hate of formless things,
squirms unbidden
to the surface of an unboxed grave
worming its way upward.

Fear not
are worms not of God?
Give shape the formless fears.
Disperse the miasma.
Confront the horror,
known and unknown
for are they not all creations of God?

Drive forward on butterfly wings
leave the cocoon of fear
the worms discontent.
Free mind and spirit
from the villains of despair
let sunshine flow 
through the arteries of man.


Details | Free verse | |

Wounded

Battered by the storms of life and looking for relief.
I walked into the house of God and who on earth did I meet?
There stood a man in a pretty suit with a Bible in his hand.
Words to heal, words to sooth and a balm in Gilead.

His words poured out like thunder. 
They tore my heart asunder.
They crushed my heart into.
What on earth could I do?

Should I sit within the pew and never say a word?
Or should I launch back at him to show him I don’t  scare?
Should I sit with a very straight face?
Or should I stand and walk out at a fast pace?

Members applauded as he spoke with grace.
I could not even look upon the smirk on his face.
Wounded in the house of God this just should not be…
Wounded in the house of God how painful can that be???



An actual incident that happened in 2005. Poem was started but never finished 
until today. I have learned men are human too and they do make mistakes. We 
must find that place of forgiveness and move on.
Psalms 141:5-Let the righteous smite me; it shall be a kindness…







Details | Free verse | |

His Testament (Sedoka)

Joseph His servant
Enslaved by those in the dark
A female falsely accused
Delivered by God
Displayed a heart of pure gold
True testament of God’s love


Comments:   One does not have to look too far in today's society to find a modern 
day Joseph. The Sedoka is an unrhymed poem made up of two three-line 
poems called a katauta with the following syllable counts: 5/7/7, 5/7/7.  A Sedoka, 
pair of katauta as a single poem, may address the same subject from differing 
perspectives.  The katauta is an unrhymed three-line poem with the following 
syllable counts: 5/7/7.  This Sedoka highlights Joseph, God’s noble servant and 
dreamer


Details | Free verse | |

LONELY

Death is upon us it follows near.
Chasing looking for a brake
Falling we are alone. We go
Consumes our soul just as we speak.

Pain is no longer. 
Life has begun. 
Our soul floating away.
Finding peace if we let it!

Agony is too deep.
Waiting to try our new life.
Alone we still pass others.
Deep in a grave we lie.

Only to devour our soul. 
Climbing to a higher level.
Held down and only given sorrow.
Breaking our hopes we run to hit a wall.

Escaping our world we all know.
Taken to a place not like ours.
Suffering to eternity. 
Only to think we have achieved.
 
Always lonely will I be.
Waiting and hoping. 
Someday to be filled with life 
Having one to share 

A floating being is all I’m able
Roaming the earth 
Looking for a lost love
One to hold and care 

Hardened hearts are near
Opening them I warm inside
Cold lying still no response
Pushed away I take my self

My soul bleeding deep
Heart has withered only to reap
Pain and anguish is all allowed 
No light in sight I’m too proud

Release my pain floating away 
To relinquish my soul set it free! 
My sorrow has lifted my own is near
Wanting to be free and painless 

Take my heart and toss it away
Only able to cry 
Hardened to the touch it waits to be loved
Waiting for someone to care 

Always end up here 
Depressed and lonely
Drawn and without care
Pain runs to deep 

Burning and scaring long and hard!
Some to stay forever 
Never letting me awake 
Keeping me down dragging my head

Someday may it lift!
I have friends who care!
I’m the one at fault for it is I!
If I can’t care for me, where will I be?

Lonely at last day in and out
Why do I try same old thing
Maybe? One day it will happen!
For now I remain! 


Details | Free verse | |

Fallen Angel

As she falls she thinks
She thinks of what she did to make this happen
She was not perfect in his eyes
She is no longer pure
He expected her to be good
She was supposed to guide those on the wrong path
And guard those innocent few
She was to be a role model
But she has fallen now
She can no longer be that
She is not innocent anymore
She has been treated like a disobedient child
He has disowned her like a pregnant daughter
He refuses to forgive her
She was supposed to be perfect
She was supposed to remain untouched for eternity
The one everyone wanted but couldn’t have
But that didn’t happen 
And she has been tossed aside 
Tossed aside like ugly clothes
She let someone touch her
And for that she can never return
She thinks he has overreacted
She doesn’t see what she did as wrong
She believes it was destined to happen
But he sees it has the worst possible thing she could do
He disowned her for one mistake
But she hopes he will let her come back
Maybe one day he will welcome her home
But for now he won’t
She imagines her new life
She thinks falling will be the hardest thing
Maybe one day she will rise again
Being a fallen angel was never her goal 
But that is what she is
And until he forgives her
That is what she will remain


Details | Free verse | |

A Letter to My Son

On this day I write to you my dear child
In hoping that this letter finds you well
After many years of hardship I gave you
I’ve begun to wonder how you are
And how you have grown up to be

In these final years of mine,
 I now truly see the mistake I made
The mistake that cost me so much
My mistake that cost me those I love
My Mistake that cost me my son and family

I know I hurt you and caused you so much pain
I hurt you physically, emotionally, and mentally
I brought to you a pain a father should never bring upon a child

I was blinded by the ignorance and hatred taught to me
I let it cloud my mind and I embraced it.

I don’t seek forgiveness from you
All I wanted to say is that I still love you

I am truly sorry I was not the father you expected me to be
I wish I could have been a better father to you
And not the cold hearted bastard you came to know
All I hope is that your dreams come true

May you have a sweet nights and happy days
With all my love I send you this letter,
May those that love you keep loving you,

With all my love,
From an old man that wishes he can change the past.


Details | Free verse | |

SHARE

Sharing shows the true way of friendship that comes

from the heart for it shall not pull us apart,

Sharing is a way of showing your love with somebody's

heart.

Share what you have to offer in life an go a long ways toward

the precouse way toward Heaven where the Angel's shall go forward

with love.


Share the the touch of what is in store for you in the beginning of

life among the christian's from above.


 GOD BLESS YOU!


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Sorry-A Poem for my kids-Jani, Billy, Josh, and Kristin

I'm sorry to all of my children
How I wish I could go back to change
The wrong things I've put you all through
And to make time rearrange
Those times to good moments for all of you
I'm sorry for what my life, fears and screw ups have put all four of you through
I simply rolled with what those fears handed me
Yes I so should've done more
And not just let it be
I was so scared and didn't really know what to do
When you're standing inside a house with the rook on fire
Well you, in that moment, are to blind to see
What's happening all around
Now I see it all to clearly and the fire is burning everything down to the ground
I'm sorry I wasn't there for you like I should've been
There's no excuse for it
Those wounds you now bear may not ever mend
And I live with that everyday
But that doesn't mean the love that I feel
For each one of you isn't real
It most certainly is
I'm not asking any of you to forgive me or accept my apology
But know that this all comes from my heart
Pain and rage will tear ones soul apart
And none of these words will make the past different, go away or any better
We do still have a chance, however, to overcome it and get through the stormy 
weather together
Being better people in the end
So while this don't make my mistakes you bear go away
I still need to say
You can hate me more and more everyday
If that's what is helping you to get by and cope
But no matter how much hate you have for me, I still love all four of you 
unconditionally
Perhaps one day you can each find it in your hearts to forgive me
Not for me, but for yourselves cause it's truly the only way you'll ever fully be able to 
move on........Love Mom


Details | Free verse | |

'If today was my last day'

If today was my last day,
I would tell my friends, family and 
even my foes
how much they have influenced my life;

if today was my last day, 
I would embrace the weather
whether it is winter or summer;

if today was my last day,
I would offer apologies to
those I have offended
and to those I have hurt;

if today was my last day, 
I would ensure that the people
left behind know that I love them
and that the life I lived was a blissful one;

if today was my last day,
I would thank the Lord for giving me 
the time on earth and be wishful that I have
accomplished all that He has set out for me from birth;

if today was my last day,
I would want it to be a day 
of no regrets, 
a day where there is more laughter than tears

if today I took my last breath 
I would want it to be a day,
where I smelled the flowers,
where I glance at Table Mountain for the last time
and whisper Lord, I was truly blessed…


Contest: If I had just one day left to live
Placed: 5th


Details | Free verse | |

LOVE

Loyalty
One self
Virtuous
Eternity


Details | Free verse | |

A DIALOGUE WITH GOD

Come Father, become human and kind...
sit at my  blessed and abundant table,
and have a dialogue with me!
Many questions assumed for myself:
like uncotrollable rivers flooding their banks...
pitifully susceptible to oblivion;
a disaster so real and not too stealthy...
come Father,suspend time!  

Indisputible are Your commandments
that make the sinners tremble
and the mighty complain and ramble;
unchangeable are Your moral demands,
and the devouts heed them with reverence...
to diffuse them without diffidence!
    
Come Father,engorge this eager spirit...
descend to clear up contradictory opinions,
words dictated by the die-hard and undignified;
this is not a conception or a dilemma,
but an enormous and contemptuous enigma
engraved on the souls that engage in snarling tactics
to ensconce, not to enrapture what is good...
and in doing so they captivate people in sin!

I declare my faithfulness with words that prolifate
and have  wonder and inspiration...
true words that express a genuine faith;
I am not  prognostic...I rely on devine intervention,
and shun what lacks in importance...
not debasing what is sacred to satisfy their impertinence! 

Come Father, have this promenade...
let's talk about their impervious minds
that collide with truth with impetuous haste;
come father, let's make them perfect and pious...
give them a plausible momentum of grace,
and make them victorious and vindicated! 


Details | Free verse | |

Ridiculous Me

Watch this scene with both eyes and try not to blink C: --> 

I stood there... silently
Like a predator near prey 
I sneak behind YOU

You weren't even aware of it!! Ha-ha! 

I made YOU jump hIgH
Like a startled hare
I chuckle and smile

You know that mischievous smile of mine? 

Your reaction was
PRICELESS - you were so upset
But YOU forgave me

Well...I'm flattered. . . 

We laugh'd together (just like the good times)
In a chorus - our volume
Picked up extreme sound

Believe me - I could hear our laughter from a mile away!

But I'm glad I did
My best to make you giggle

Ridiculous me... 
Wouldn't you agree?


Details | Free verse | |

Autonomy

There is nothing here anymore, he said
As the dirty glass jars fill up with rain
Drop full by drop full
Against diluted ambivalence
turned gray
Wetting both of our tongues 
Soaking dark clothing into heavy burdens
So much like myself, I fear

I’m going to break everything open, I reply
Take these shards 
String them up into the trees
Offerings of little elements 
As they chime softly 
Deep
Deep in the evergreens

There is nothing here anymore, I say 
Nothing more, but my tangle of dreams
And the light
Which breaks open reflections
One hundred times larger
Than what I can ever be


Details | Free verse | |

'Altering Decisions'

You made a life altering decision
That changed your life.
A choice that left mine empty,
I hated you for 
taking my son away
with one bullet… 

I hated you for pulling the 
trigger that day
I wished you were dead too…  

I wanted you to 
feel my pain, 
to experience my heartache 
I never thought,  
I would ever forgive you
until that day,  
I realized that the anger 
that made you pull the trigger 
are consuming me,  
drowning me… 

The love that I had for my son 
almost completely gone 
wasted energy and time, 
time that would not bring my son back
neither would the denial
that you needed my forgiveness, 
in the end your sin 
would not be a continued cycle…

My life might have changed forever that day
but I also learned the divine gift, 
forgiving someone can bring about... 

Even if it took me years to embrace. 

*loosely based on a true story of a SA mother who forgave her son's killer.. The story was highlighted on Reconciliation Day* 

© All Rights Reserved


Details | Free verse | |

One Man Can

One man can commit
The slightest infraction against you
And you will hate him forever.

Another can string you up by the thumbs
And you will say,"I'm sorry".

I'm sorry.


Details | Free verse | |

The Storm

And the storm calls to me in ways you'll never understand
A gentle call that urges my soul forth
The lighting guiding a path for my feet to walk
Between the stones and ash of all that once was
I stand in the echoing silence of the rain 
It drops down upon my skin like the blessing waters of heaven
Soothing me, lifting the weight from my body 
I feel at once as if I am home
Standing amid two dimensions 
Caught between two skies - here and there
The night wraping around me in warmth
The gentle wind lifting me off my feet
Drops from the clouded moon washing away my body
and I am left just a soul, an essence 
The storm calls me forth from beneath my roof
Beckoning me into its depth 
I stand among the reeds in the basin 
They dance and sway as if welcoming me
And I sway with them back 
Caught up in the power that charges the air
That threatens to sweep me away 
If the ground will just loosen its hold
The thunder rumbles a low welcoming growl
And I get pleasently lost within it
I am so small compared to its vastness
I close my eyes and succumb to the skies wishes
Rising higher until my feet no longer touch the ground 
My fingertips touch the liquid color of the stars
A sigh drifts from my lips
There is no need of thought to stay afloat
There is no demand to breathe in air
No crushing weight upon my chest
As my lungs struggle to survive
There are no struggles here
I make my bed on blackened clouds
And give in to the call
The storm has claimed me as its own 
It was such a struggle to stay upon the ground
When the storm would call me home


Details | Free verse | |

Liar

That’s how she saw me

A lying jerk
Filled with mal-intent
And inebriated twist of the devil’s tongue

She removed my smile
My patience
My need for her

She was a professor
with a Masters Degree in Investigative Drama

Drinking shots of animosity and scorn
From half-empty glass
Layered in a syllable abused tint

Sucking accountability, dry

She removed my smile
My patience
My want for her

Vials of sadness
Broken over mattress
Where I entered her
Into innocence realm

She begged for more
She begged me to stay

But, I was already marked from argument’s first revelation 

Because even when I held her hand
Even when I welcomed her into my arms
After being beaten for being her diamond ring’s shadow

Even when I brought her closer to peace
It wouldn’t ever be enough

My smallest mistakes would become Armageddon’s cry

My apologies
The tissue

She removed my smile
My patience
My trust for her

Because I
Was a piece of crap

An irregular painting titled: “The Bad Guy”

Messages of sangre coated angst
Going to wrong number

Her errors
Still made me see her as a precious woman
Waiting to regain her peace
Her identity

But I
Was a liar

A screw up

Our finish line had no ribbons
For she had already cut my c(h)ord

Silence
Cold shoulder
My only way to hold this peace

She thought she could leave me

But I
Was already gone

Her tears’ contempt made me let go
Fears’ discontent helped me confirm my Western sunsets

To
Fly

Fly
High

Fly
HIGH

For serenity’s wing behooves me to sway
Towards these winds of change
Solace will hold me on palm
 
As I wish with final prayer
That Karma
Goes easy on her

© Drake J. Eszes


Details | Free verse | |

Return Of Your King

Reflections of imperfections have shown me a way that I can move mountains through my power of faith even though I can't see him I know he is real through the power of prayer and a Love that I feel It's growing inside me like a flower in bloom shall I reveal my powers or is it too soon I am reading the signs through my darkness I find a reason for belief in the light of mankind that I know shall overcome the greatest of odds the Love I seek amazes me especially through the flaws because now I am inspired through the hero's that bring my throne through the darkness on which I return on as your King.


Details | Free verse | |

My Prayer on Xmas Day

My Prayer on Xmas Day 


You came as a beam of Light, for the suffering humanity,
To remove, cruelties of Life  and to spread Love and forgiveness,
And became,  a symbol   of a new dawn,
Ending the dread of the darkness by your sublime Love, Light  & forgiveness,


Simplicity,  and the teachings of forgiveness  and Love for all,
Was the name of your great causes, and your divine   appearance, O’ Jesus,
Your heart melts to heal,  every suffering human,  
And the light of your love, filled a new life to awaken the souls of those, 
Who were in miseries and pains  and  were in great sufferings, 


Humanity would always remain indebted,  for showing everyone,
A path of Love, forgiveness and living a life of truthful non-voilence,
My humble   prayer to You,   on the great day of Xmas would be,           
To show a path of Love in the hearts of those, who are living in hatred,
To throw a light of kindness and Love, on those, who are in great distress,


Instead of revenge and violence, which is slowly engulfing the entire world,
Fill the heart of every human being, irrespective  of,
Places, beliefs and religions,  with the Light of Your divine Love  & benevolence,
And bless them, so that they may know the joy of living with Peace and Love,
And may adopt a better way of life, of living with love and kindness for all others.

Ravindra


Kanpur India 19th Dec. 2010

GREETINGS  FOR ALL

With Greetings for all my friends anywhere in the world, for a Merry Christmas and a very
Happy and Prosperous New Year 2011.
 


Details | Free verse | |

over and over agin

sometimes i talk to myself, 
my mind is racing,
i dont know what to do...
so hard to explain.
depression isn't a stage
or a faze some kids go through
it shatters you...
i saw it all. 
she cried silent in her bed,
blood stains covered her favorite jeans,
her every shirt,
long sleeve ofcourse...
she suffered through it all with few people to call friend
and more to call enemy
even more to say where quite dissappointed....
FAT
her first name in school,
not started by a bully
or a mean rival,
but by her sister, 
and it echoed through her soul,
repeating in her mind... over and over again,
like the ripples of still water
when a pebble is dropped
flash frozen in time
repeating,
over and over again...
It was the first name they gave her,
millions where created over the years,
some unique
some repeating again, just as the first had..
gothic they called her,
emo, fat, ugly....worse things.
but in her mind, things where worse.
everything was repeating,
over and over again,
finally she believed it. 
she asked for help, from everyone
tried to explain to parents she wasnt well,
got called a psycho for asking to see a theripist,
not from a teacher,
not from a class mate,
but from her own father, who wouldn't, couldn't,
believe there could possibly be a thing wrong....
finally, crying, she confessed her bloody secret to a teacher.
rather then giving her time,
she is sent back to class crying her eyes out, as if she wherent going through enough...
she is sent to the principals office a few minutes later, after breaking down in class...
the princlipal says she needs help,
sends her and her dad for a risk evaluation,
her dads crying as she shows him her cuts...
they walk into a hospital room, 
it smells of chemicals and hand sanitizer,
the lady at the desk gives her a smile.
then she goes into a room with a lady,
her cheeks are sunken in and shes wearing way too much makeup,
the girl is gaging on her perfume,
and she looks really intimidating....
her dark brown hair looks dead and flat
even though its a bit wavy, 
and she wears somewhat of a mocking frown.
asks her all these questions,
is mommy beating her?
no
is daddy raping her?
no
is she doing drugs?
not alot
is anyone beating her?
pass...
did anyone molest her? 
pass....
oxcarbezapine, trazadone, citalipran, clinazapam, colonipan,
valium, lithium, more.......
and thats what they gave her,
more... 
some numbed the pain
some brought it out
tearing through her organs,
she became an addict by the time she was fourteen....
over dose after over dose
some for pleasure
some for pain,
gashes on her legs getting deeper,
this time she didnt tell a soul,
not even those she had come to call friends....
wakeup she screamed in her head over and over again
as she dropped weight like it was nothing....
you cant controll it she argued as things became worse. 
at age fourteen she attempted suicide,
she didnt quite succeed.
the medication took away her aappitite....
she liked it
she hated her body
hated herself
felt out of controll
found a new way to cope
as she shoved tooth brush after toothbrush down her throat
to keep her body from nuitrients...
as she whent weeks and weeks spitting food into napkins and making excuses 
I ate at my friends house....
spoken as a whisper
heard like a sentance
echoing in her mind over and over again,
along with that word, all the words,
FAT!!!!!!
ugy, anoying, stupid, fake, worthless, nothing...
one bite she would say
rocking back and forth
craving nothing but food
her body racked with hunger pain
one bite and there she was again
FAT!
over and over and over again
back to a toothbrush
this time she sees blood
she saw her ribs
she saw her bones,
it wasnt good enough,
she almost died, again....
choking on this deep dissappointment in herself,
gaging on everything they where pushing down her throat, 
their words, and their insults, their criticism.... their drugs
all shoved down her throat like candy
and just as she was was trained to do she swallowed despite the bad taste
or the hurt
or the fact that at the rate she was going she would be dead soon...
and you know why? 
because daddy yelled 
and couldnt accept what was happening
not because he wanted to hurt her
but because it hurt him,
and she let him believe,
because she could take the hurt if it meant he didnt have too.
because mommy didnt want to sit in her room all day
smoking weed
doing nothing,
practically having us raise ourselves,
she didnt mean to take anger, or frustration or hurt out on her daughter
she suffered everyday in her solitary confinement,
and from a young age she accepted her bedroom was the cage
 her mother had created for herself.
because sister didnt want to effect her the way she did
she was just frustrated
fed up with the way things where
scared, she needed someone to take her cruelty
and to help heal her pain...
because people in school
who where so cruel
had to have learned from somewhere
and she wasnt going to play into their games,
and they knew she was an easy target
because she would never attack someone so weak
and she accepted her suffering was a sacrafice
to help all these people....
to help her dad,
her mom,
her sister,
every person who was beaten abused or hurt
 and felt so weak at home they wanted to feel strong in the one safe place they had.
because depite the fact she had died inside,
and almost passed away on the out,
it was a saccrafice she was willing to make
so that no one else would have to feel that kind of pain,
and they all inflicted it and broke her down'untill there was nothing left but a shell
of somthing that could have been
and never had the chance
and why? 
because she would take it and wouldnt strike back,
because sometimes "just taking it"
isnt so much about the weakness not to do anything
but about the strangth not to hurt others the way they hurt you...


Details | Free verse | |

Stale Mate

We are nothing but simple pawns.
We’re Pushed around by others it’s oh so wrong.
I look around with my eyes wide open.
All I see is humanity choking.
We are all lost destroying humanity.
The way we live is twisted insanity.
Let’s try something for a minute and turn to a friend.
Try asking, how have you been?
Or when they respond lets actually listen.
Its friendship and love we’re tragically missing.
Why must we be in a stale mate?
Stop what where doing and lose all the hate.
Let’s find ourselves we’ve been lost a while.
Its imperative we do this life’s not so vile.
We are all humans and all of us feel.
It’s simple, respect and everyone heals.


Details | Free verse | |

Role-Model

When I was called little brother, 
I smiled.
It meant I have an elder sibling.
One from whom I could learn,
To discern,
Between Light and Dark.

What about the Grey?

Only a few would about the grey; 
Enquire.
Even fewer, 
Perhaps none
Would even begin to aspire,

Is grey the divider?

What is a divider?
A partition,
A separation, 
A barrier.

In essence a carrier,
Of both dark and Light;
Having both thane sight!

The grey is never contrite,
It does and will do on sight!!!

Come with your purported might!
Closer…
Closer…
Unseen seen chaos,
These are my instruments,
Your might;;; 
Will be eaten as sacrements.

For continual human growth within, 
Mistakes rectified by the elder or role model;
Taught the current crop must be,
Lessons are as seeds;;; 
Planted into our mother, 
Blending with Earth, Water and Sun,
The seed transmutes and soon the seed has had its fun,
A plant is now the end product.

We humans are also ever transforming,
Perhaps not as apparent as natural beauty forming,

But what is natural beauty?

What is beauty?


Random randominity is beauty natural,
Random beauty is natural randominity,
Natural randominity is random beauty,
Beautiful randominity randoms naturally,


In essence;
Culturally cultural.

Not an over-spill,
Providence shines.
Understanding and comprehension,
In succession,
For thee. 

The trick however is to pass on that understanding and comprehension.
But how do you do that?
When most of the generation is tuned to the Playstation!
Violent games evocating the continuation
Of our disgusting violent nation.

Perhaps attempt to not scold or tell;
Allow thane actions to speak wonders,
As an undiscovered well.

Keep the resonance of thane bell,
Consistant.
Perhaps another revolutionary,
Your prodige has to be selectant,
Of his student, his confectionary.

Without this passing down of knowledge,
We all might as well eat the most poisonous berry.


Details | Free verse | |

Two Hearts full of Love

I am a heart full of love
that shook the pilars that held her colussium up
her heart filled with sorrow,
I swing such fury toward her heart and soul
she cowards away from me,
in fear of falling in love and not knowing what is in black
and not searching what is in the light of pure white.

I am a heart full of love,
she runs and takes the long dirt road,
through the raging mountains of the quiet countryside,
as the meadows of lilacs slowly die when Spring comes,
the blooming of the rose,
like the blooming of my heart,
a blossom on a cherry tree fall and harbour in the wintertime.
I swing toward her, she falls in fear of wanting attention and love.
Lost in the midnight twilight,
the flaming torch guides her through the dark holes of meaningless souls.
and like a frightened hummingbird,
she flees away from the secrets of falling in love.

A heart full of love ready to love,
it is diffcult to feel and to show,
but as if a rose that blooms in Springtime
my love is ready to bloom.

Pettles lay along a darkened atmosphere
lit up only with four wax candles
a portrait of a woman hung over a mantel piece
in honour of my one true love.

As the twilight shine though my bedroom window,
I show a heart full of love,
to take and to hold for eternity.

And as she slowly moves forward,
she takes me home with her,
and opens her chest and shows me her heart
with a glass of red wine and charming cigarette.
She sheads tears of pain and sorrow on my broud shoulder,
I curise her hair, silk laced hair,
shining against the twilight and the moonlit sky.

My heart full of love,
so divine, so original
a one of a kind.

We make love in the midst of the twilight,
as my dream girl is now reality and my pain is no more,
her pain is no more.
Too show such love makes a man feel free
and his soul lighter.
She holds him there,
as the sun rises over the mountains.
The birds sing a tune of cheerfulness,
and they talk about everything beautiful and kind,
that is still left in this cruel and empty hearted world.

Romance and love shared
with a heart full of love,
smile and kiss upon smooth lips,
feel me against your tight body,
and love me till the morning
when Blue eyed Death is staring us in the face.
and we go with him,
and play a game of risk,
and together forever,
onto a diffrent world
we shall love each other forever,
for you and I both have a heart full of love.


Details | Free verse | |

Everywhere

You are good for me
My baby
I am you, but the you just never ends
Looking down the puddle of muddy water
I see your troubled face
Instead of me, I tried to save you

I fly up to the sky and I am surrounded
By beauty, beautiful clouds and the blue
Snugly and warm in knowing
I am looking at you
Inside I am dying but in my eyes
I am living

Your soul took flight long ago
But it has not abandoned me
I am racing to catch you
And I am very close
You may be not inside me
But you are everywhere


Details | Free verse | |

The Devil Walks

The devil walks 
gets tired
and sits,
and while the devil sits
the devil picks up a tired fruit
rotting, and with jagged nails he peals
slowly, the tender fruit bruising
and he tastes it, smacking his dried lips
and the devil eats
decayed fruit and sour wine	                 nothing lush and sating
then the devil rests
and resumes his walk,
and later the devil sits again
rubs his feat
and goes to bed
and in the morning
he breaks his fast on curses and lies           nothing so filling as figs and nuts
and begin the devil’s walk again,

his walk
on the road our thoughts paved
where all that grows is bad and unwell
to the cross our words built
where flames dance and all is unwell
and he is condemned
upon christening
upon the hearing of his name
and the wobbling of his first steps
to walk a road less traveled,
to be the leader
of our very own crusade
armed with words
against himself
to see him burn,

our crusade of one
and many
on roads first paved upon his birth
to bring the devil down.

The devil walks
The devil eats
and pelted by our stones
He does but sleep
For what we sow
The devil reaps

and there is justice in punishment
there is reward in reckoning
there is bitterness in my mouth
as I say these words
and pity
              the devil
his due.


Details | Free verse | |

Proximity of Choice

 
The night air crisply flows Brushing past my sill with a caress The final blooms of the magnolia's Upon her skin, fragrantly confess Autumn’s wildflowers Sit upon the boudoir ledge Handpicked this morning To their beauty she makes her pledge Chiffon sheers move With a sultry waltz in the breeze Moonlight glows as a flickering candle gliding across the wall as if on a trapeze Her lover, submerged in the elements of her boudoir Is mesmerized and aroused by its sights and smells He finds great pleasure where femininity dwells Scented perfume causes his love to swell The flickers cease to be Their sighs belong To the rhythms that Waltzed upon the Wall Carole Cookie Arnold 2010


Details | Free verse | |

Love And Pricks

I Love the elderly so full of history I love my generation who kept me a mystery I love the children who's future, now bright for I have died for them to capture the light for i understand pain more than ever once I released it the anger got better as it went away from the people and into my music without a single reason to prove it without a reason to let Love's light in I didn't, it found me and lesser I sin God and my father both let me know it would all be okay so very long ago even tho the road would be full of pricks even back then I'd tell them you can all suck my dick. -Bj Fard


Details | Free verse | |

An Ode to LIFE Part 1

An Ode To LIFE


As I lay my head down and start to fall asleep I see myself being carried off to a place and time the place of our Lords birth in Bethlehem of Judea

As in the Bible tells the story of His life and how he lived and died in that human seance and rose on the day He told of

I do not remember being here but I remember the story I was taught so many years ago

As I walk through the streets of Bethlehem I see each scene  and hear  every word as I am learning the story they telling is true

The writer writes of a jealous King  and his way of dealing with his people and of Mary and Joseph who came to Bethlehem to have a child

The story tells of the three wise men  who saw a star in the north and heard of a child  who was born to be the King of the Jews  and come to see and bring Him gifts 

An  angel from the Heavens above came to Mary and Joseph in a dream and told them they had to leave Bethlehem or King Herod would have their son killed 

So they left Bethlehem and went to Egypt and there they lived until King Herod no longer ruled

As I follow along in my dream I see each scene  and hear  every word as I am puzzled by the fact I understand each

I don’t understand why I’m going through this time but I know I must continue on this journey 

As I am pulling through a time where I reach the place of Jesus’ in  Nazareth of Galilee

As I watched Him grow and work in His father's shop I could see the thing in Him that were with me

As I walk along the streets and look around I hear the people talk of a child that speaks of wondrous love that’s all forgiving and of a Father in Heaven that’s loving and true.

By Rev. Samuel Mack, OMS
Copyright 2013

                                                            Inspired by God 

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Free verse | |

West Side Story, My Brothers, Mother and Me

I cried for them this afternoon
Knew them since the matinee started
Saw them fall in love
At first sight, the world stopped
Everything was silent at the sight of it
They looked and were lovers
Later that day on their knees
Repeating vows that till today
They saw only in throw away plays
I cried for them, their lost love
But not for mother whose long life ended
By the Yankee Sluggers creeping disease
What was there to cry about?
As the blue ice calved from glacier slabs
Creased iron plates, made orphans, widows
And most aboard but not me or my mother
Or the yet unborn twice told tale
Tony was told she died, frantic with fear
He called out for her but got Chino instead
Saw her running to him, delirious with fear and joy
He got a bullet instead, tearing threw his back
Breaking his heart in half he fell into her arms
She covered his face with kisses and tears
And I too wept again for what could have been
What should have been for mother, died without my tears                                   
For I knew not how to give!
Instead to those I gave tears so freely
But I knew them since the matinee started
Who cried for my three brothers
Charley, like Marley dragged his chains around
And spent a life time sawing them off, Michael who fell
From heaven one day, curly hair and welcoming smile
Orphaned by mother who just gave him away
Brain dead one day in June, the rest followed six months to the day
Brother Tom, large lonesome eyes never saw what the world wondered.                             Water boarded at age five, he left and never returned
Last month got cancer and died exactly one month later.
I cried today for the matinee lovers,
When I should have cried for them. 

 


Details | Free verse | |

A Sinner Like God

“I have forgiven mother”
She tarries with hope
that the good woman will pray her clemency for her own sins, 
but that hour is expired; 
Gee grew a strong wit
"Mother is no longer my burden"
Jesus came from hard conscience to corroborate her lies
The WORD written in black and white:
“Us twain is now one; for this reason I depart from her”
Three moons less than time in the safety of the womb is slight

In the past mother was necessity, 
but she grew weary of the pace;
her birth city received her
The old Jewish woman was left
with stage three pressure ulcers
while the twain bender in Atlantic City
Their backsides were not masked by mother’s conformity
My mother's now defiant fingers work dutifully in another excrement, 
goat stool in her callaloo garden

Before the recession, money was tossed in all directions;
I took hold of a few green ones.
She lived to outdo her alliance, 
but high seat killed Miss. Thomas’ cat
Mother watched her outshone the Jones
The recession was never her downfall;
immorality got the better of her. 
Jesus was overlooked
“put the WORD to work,
compensate the guardian of your youth”

She had to let a nation know how well off she was
Her enemies know her silver spoon was achieved
Her splurges buried ethics, and smiles were wide as graves
She let me know in scripts:
“A new being I am now; My shine is unlike years ago”
Vanity is not here in show, but her heart remains the same
Like the Jewish elder, mother is spurned 
with bruising on her heart.


Details | Free verse | |

Will We Know Him

Will We Know Him?

Will we know Him if He stood in front of us?
If He walked by us on the street?
Will we know Him?
If we have a chance to meet Him in our  lifetime?
In that split second that we meet Him?
Our eyes met for the first time?
Will we know Him?
Yes reading the moment we stood side by side?
Our smiles are very clear
Our heart jumps around
Yes we do know Him?
That look, and that feeling
When we know we've found our home
Yes we do know Him
Yes we know what to say to Him
As we walk away together
Yes we know Him as He knows us His children
We are finally together

Rev. Samuel Mack, OMS
Copyright 2013

http:paladinnews1.blogspot.com


Details | Free verse | |

My Oblivion


    My love, shaken to its foundations,

          what I thought was immortal,

          what i thought was eternal.

    My mind, drowning, falling, running,

          And before me, echoes of our life,

          serenity, of my downward spiral.

    So lost are my desires, 

          love pushed to oblivion, my failers. 

    A union in ruin,

          where is my adversity,

          where is my forgivness,

    Is this the moment, the longing,

          after all this time, could there be love.

          the past must be gone, forever

    This is, my life in your hands,

          these words, of my heart are yours,

          my inspiration, my sacrifice,

          for my soul, still calls your name.

          

    





    


Details | Free verse | |

The deterioration of distant deities In a vicious solvent

What do you need?
Loneliness
Behind your heart’s curtain
Standing defiant
Kneeling slowly
Flowers of hope
We have sowed in flesh
Withering
Under narcissistic necessity
In An atmosphere 
Made for self protection
Clouds consisting of consciousness
Evaporating 
Lost like empathy

Apocalyptic accusations
Fingers of fate
pointed
Producing
Stressful souls
Sharp words
Rip and tear
All meaning
That lives
When your eyes open


Let me burrow 
To secrets
Held so close
Gasping for your breath
And dying for your life
Let me in


Details | Free verse | |

Sitting Alone

Sitting alone here,
all by myself,
looking at a reflection that I do not recall.
I see a face looking back at me,
a twin,
but not my twin,
no I see a pale face,
I see jealously, pain, sorrow, and a frown
I see all the negative.
I see fear,
I see nothing.

I am sitting alone,
in my room
white walls surround me.
I hear the trains blow their horns off in the distance,
and the cars and trucks roaring down the lonesome highways.
I can even the crying and wailing of sirens
blazing down the avenues,
"Where is the fire, folks!?"

The wind blows through my window,
moving the blinds back and forth,
and I sit there alone,
smiling and singing a little.
Sitting there alone,
peaceful and tired
wanting to rest my head,
but scared too face the nightmares.
Too hear the voices of the dead
call out my name.
And I sit there alone
thinking of what once was,
beauty and harmony nomore
in my trial of certainty.


Details | Free verse | |

Recompense

His life became part of mine.
His story became my story.
I felt the pain he endured
With great compassion.
I understood his reasons;
Why vengeance became an
Integral part of his life.
Why he couldn’t let it go
How it sustained him--
Kept him in a lucid state
Unaware of how it was
Damaging his inner spirit.

Slowly, very slowly over
The many years that passed
He adapted to walk with me,
And as grains of sand slip
Through a filled hand—
Grain by grain, little by little
His hatred grew less and less
And he began to live his life
Out of love, as his vengeance
Began to vanish like the few
Grains of sand left, abducted 
By the restless winds of time.
He never saw it coming!



For Syed Amaan Ahmad's Free Style Contest



Details | Free verse | |

Where The Next Dollar Will Come From

I'm worried where the next dollar will come from.
Will she ever arrive?
Will she ever show up?
But why am I worrying?
Stop it!
It's all in God's Great Hands!
It's all under God's control!
It's all within His plans!
It's all His
And He will provide
Because He is our Father!
He loves us!
It's all His!
Trust Him!
I know it's difficult;
He will not lead you wrong.
He knows where you need to go.
He knows what you need to endure.
It's all His plan.
It's all in His Hands!
Lay down your life;
Give the control.
He is in control!
Thank You Father!
Trust Him!
It will all be okay!
Trust Him!
Thank You God!
Thank You Jesus!
Thank You Holy Spirit!
I love You always!
I trust You always!
I trust You!
I trust You!
Yes, yes I do!
I trust You!
I love You!
Amen!


Details | Free verse | |

Scars Left Behind

You were always honest
unfortunately it didn't extend to yourself

Regal persona was never exceeded by your accomplishments
If only you were as important as you thought others thought you were

Some bring joy when they enter a room
no one would ever accuse you of that
Leaving was always the best gift you could offer

Being you could not have been easy
No friends to speak of
accept one
maybe not even him
I think he froze in your shadow
He has begun to thaw in your absence

Strangely I miss you
Not entirely sure why
Do I in some weird way owe you for my success?
Without you I would not have been born

You are gone
Certainly not forgotten
The scars are my reminder
A multitude of memories mark my soul
Not your typical father son fare
Norman Rockwell wouldn't paint our picture
I wish I could remember happier times
some wishes don't come true

Eventually our nightmare came to an end
You gave us the gift of leaving
Am I evil for being Thankful?
You died alone
Should I have flown to be by your side?
Perhaps
Somehow it seems fitting you parted in this way
If I had come I may not have been able to hide my relief
Now we both have rest



Scars Left Behind Contest
By: Richard Lamoureux


Details | Free verse | |

Eternally Alive

golden tendrils light the way,
glisten against the gate open wide,
out pour the angels, into the galaxy,
speeding along on celestial tide,
search for souls, some coming alive,
search for souls, recently died

those coming alive, confused, cry,
remember no past, trapped in new life,
unsure the future, how long it will last,
comes an angel to watch over and protect,
to remain and comfort until last breath,
then to guide a worthy soul
into the loving light of eternal life

those recently died, conscience stricken,
scream with fear, have no past,
trapped in everlasting night,
an angel, long departed, returns
to give testimonial, of one,
who cared more for life,
than the warmth and comfort of the light,
will now guide an unworthy soul,
into eternal blackness and never ending night

golden tendrils light the way,
the gate, gently sways, then closes all the way,
the angels return into the realm of God's eye,
souls eternally alive


Details | Free verse | |

In his Arms

A story of Faith..
How does anyone explain why they believe the Faith they have .
I can only tell you through the eyes of a 5yr old child .
That child being myself 

so let me rewind a bit in time .
It was preschool to 1st grade , I would fall into a vegetable state at school , with my head down on the desk .
My Mother was a very talented RN and worked in triage at St. Francis Hospital
She would take me to the best of Pediatrics , only to be told ," take her home give her a aspirin,  if fever gets to high , and call us in the morning . 

All I can remember is this.

I was laying on my Mothers bed as from the ceiling it appeared a man that resembled "Jesus Christ ' and his Angels , 6 on each side lifted me from the bed in his arms , and took me to a place of warmth , light and love like I have never felt before since.

I was held by him as he said , you can stay here and no longer feel pain , or you may go back. I wanted so badly to stay , but I thought of my Mothers tears , and I was sent right into my little body again only to miss that feeling I had my whole life "in His Arms "

I got up out of bed , walked to the living room , where I saw my Mother in the distance baking .'  The Grinch whom stole Christmas ' was on TV. I then noticed a tree all lighten up with decorations, I walked  towards my Mom with a blanket in my hand .

My Mom turned and she had a plate of cookies , her face white as a ghost . I asked her " Mommy , Is it Christmas ?  " she started to cry , and held me as she said " Yes Honey , it is , it is Christmas Eve. " as her tears hit my shoulder . I then asked " Why are you crying ? "  Santa Claus is coming ! " I replied,  as happy as a little 5 yr. old could be.

I was taken to a Chiropractor that week ,as a last result , He told her it was simply a miracle I was alive  .  My Spine was out of place and no Oxygen was going to my brain , in one or 2 days , I would be brain dead.

I found out later in my life at 18 yrs. old , it was shaken baby syndrome . My Father confessed to me as he to cried , at his Moms home at Christmas time . He had carried the guilt with him for years . He was a born again Christian , and a new life he had wanted with true forgiveness .

I forgave him , I know the man whom lifted me was Jesus Christ that night , and there is nothing ugly at all there , so I know he to forgave him . 
Since then ..I have never doubted , I know he goes by many names  , It is Jesus Christ all the same .


Details | Free verse | |

Peace Is Needed For Pete's Sake

Imagine children waking up to bombs and sirens in the night.
Parents calming their children's screams of fright.
Rockets bursting in air.
People fleeing their homes, cries of anguish in their voices.

Violence, suffering, dying, too much-
Children homeless, parentless, living on streets.
Peace is needed for Pete's sake.

Politics, religion, race, and greed-
People world wide open your eyes.
We're destroying our human race.

Allow the children to hear laughter again.
Laying their heads on a love one's lap,
Lifting fears and giving them hope
A brighter future for man, woman and child.
Is that asking for too much?

Nothing but destruction in minds of many.
Stop, stop destroying humankind.
Find peace and heal in time.


Details | Free verse | |

Porn No More

I've watched the war from behind closed doors;
Eyes too glued to close.
And now knowing what's in store, there's porn no more.
God's love is the only hope we know.
We are forgiven because of the love that is Jesus.
We are saved because of the love that is Jesus.
We give our lives to the Father for we are His children and He loves us.
We are loved!
No matter what we've done, we are loved!
Confess and ask for forgiveness;
This is such a beautiful gift!
Thank You God!
Thank You Jesus!
You forgive me!
You save me!
You change me!
I am changed!
I am new!
I am renewed!
I am forgiven!
I am saved!
I am changed!
There's porn no more
For God's hope is in store!
There's porn no more
For God's love is the hope of the world!


Details | Free verse | |

KIND and GENTLE

Kindheartedness to me is when someone puts their
own emotions and well being aside to help someone else.
It takes a very strong person to do so.I myself recently
had someone do so for me and I abused it.They put their
family and emotional well being aside and opened their
heart to a stranger and it backfired on them.My heart
hurts for not excepting the help that person tried to give
me and I am sorry.If I knew what to do to fix it I would
no matter what it would take.I hope I didn't take any of
the kindheartedness out of this special person.
     It was a lesson well learned.


Details | Free verse | |

Move On

So you sinned?
Well, that's done and over with!
Keep it in the past
'Cause that's where it belongs.
But ask Jesus for forgiveness;
Don't dwell on mistakes any longer
Because He makes you new again:
Renewed.
Love is the outcome;
Forget the wrongs,
Love and move on!


Details | Free verse | |

Oh Those Blues

My blues, haunting sounds I take out on my acoustic guitar.
Spiced up melodies, finger picking out my blues my way.
Those bends, holding down a string, subtle scooping of a note,
Hitting the sweet spot on those bends, oh those bends I play.
The blues I feel deep within my bones, freeing my soul way down.
The licks mean something when they come out of my guitar.
Picking is my way to release my pain, developing my own tone.
When they come out, the only soul I have to play with is my own.
My face says it all, soulfulness, sorrow, love and the getting hurt.
Sounds of my blues come from within, deep within my heart.

Singing all the sadness,and pain, the disappointments of my life.
The experiences made me who I am. You can hear it in my voice.
I have to go deep down to the depths of my soul where sun shines,
And muck is stored deep within my gut. A sad lonely place, blues.
Expressing with music releases all my pains that needs to come out.
My face says it all, a soulful bluesy release valve, creating calm within.

01/31/2013

For Becca Lucas's contest, "Chasing The Blues Away"


Details | Free verse | |

Red silk covers

you meant nothing you never said
it still meant the world to me,
a shameful encounter,a sinful collabration
making a fool of myself again and again
the time you said youll never leave me right in to my eyes
can someone lie straight in your eyes?
The time you hugged me and said you care
can someone touch you and lie in your face?
you left me without a letter ,without a hug
millions broken,never knew someone could be heartless
i have grown old in the hopes of maybe
you would turn back and come to me
nothing needed but an apology
just tell me i was wrong , i shouldn't have done what i did
i should not have said something else, where there is nothing i feel
why is it so hard for our self esteem
to admit we are wrong, respect our fellow beings
indifferent to my emotions, it doesnt hurt anymore
are we actually humans,or some mind controlled robots
i long for the day when he would realize
how he shattered my beliefs and my desires
i know he's happy  he has moved on
is that it? never to be held accountable for?
perhaps it was right , what goes around comes around
maybe karma was mistakenly brought to my door
i wish he stays happy,i dont have any grudge
i cant be burdened with one more regret
life is unfair, painful as we move on
just hard to believe,its us , we are the morons
we know the pain,we still hurt others
its not life thats hurtful, its us
everyone so anxious in running the race
knocking others out to get to the finish line
so selfish and needy we are blinded with lust
in the end man realizes ,what was it worth?
you may win the race , be crowned the king
and proudly you'd walk back to your home
sit on the couch sip hot chocolate
in the darkness of the night, youll try not to fight
think about your achievements laugh and smile
no one to cheer you, you look left and right
what is the use of being a lonesome winner?
when you have stabbed everyone to get to the position
I would rather be in a group of losers
where we all cry together at our failures
we dont have much, but we have each other
we sleep on the ground,amazing dream world there is
no pillow for our heads, no covers on our beds
but our dreams are so beautiful, we'd never want to miss
you may sleep on your silk covers with a beautiful woman on your side
you close your eyes and hear from within, deep sighs
you cant sleep peacefully on your victorious covers
remembering what youve done ,a cloud of regret hovers
or maybe you are indifferent, its not a big deal
one day it will, you will know how i feel


Details | Free verse | |

My Notebook

Stimulating ideas pop into your head
You need a pen…you need a piece of lined paper 
It looks like you’re outtah luck…no wonder you’re drowning in dread
You need a shoulder to lie your head down for a moment’s rest… 
You need a helper…to aid you while you struggle emotionally…
I’m not trying to irritate you purposely

Try with all your might…try your best
To stay optimistic and fervent 
I believe that you’ll pass the test
Be upbeat, kindhearted and jubilant  

I appreciate the words you wrote on my notebook…
Sometimes, I feel like leftovers left on the counter…
I’m a rotten mess – you’re leaving me as if I’m an uninteresting book 
Sometimes, I feel like a coward – I don’t mean to bother…

But, you’re like no other . . .

You’re like a mat – you’re constantly stepped on…
I’m like YOUR unwanted tool – 
I stepped on you and
Pushed your buttons
I accused you of being the fool 
When, in fact, I’m the fool by your side…
You’re drifting…pushing me aside…

I’m writing words of truth though – 
Expressing how much I’m fond of you 

I esteem your presence
Glowing with glee 
At times, you do say things without thinking 
I’m the god of distress – 
You’re leaving me breathless 
Cutting me down like I’m some decaying tree
You don’t see how much you make me…
Guilty for your crimes
Taking the blame about the hundredth time 

At times, I feel that I’m awkward when I’m around you

You’re like a backpack – you carry everyone’s weight…
You’re like a sponge – soaking in our stress
I’m a distraction to you – you’re wasting valuable time…but don’t hesitate 
I’m writing words of self-centered feelings – logic doesn’t exist…
But these feelings aren’t as bad as committing a crime
These feelings come and go – I just had to confess 
I didn’t mean to screw up your progress…

Hey, if you need a few sheets of paper to right on, 
Use me like a notebook instead…and write with all your might
It seems as if you read me…like a book that drags on and on 
Use me as your tool of relaxation… and read me all night  

When you wrote those words on my notebook…
It made my day…you’re such a delight 
Like reading a fascinating, classic book


Details | Free verse | |

Offended

Offended 
is ignorance
a lack of understanding
silence 
is not for everyone

humans speak
and do things 
different than you
or your faction
true 
or untrue
or stretch truth

what's the worry?
stressing 
over someone else's beliefs 
takes you away 
from your own routine

offended 
is a waste of energy
needed for nothing
causing dangerous sparks
within one's mind
one's heart
one's soul
becomes contaminated
with preoccupations

vengeance breeds furious
often unexpected actions
of ill-will occur 
or changes for the worse 
creep 
in the shadows of good
growing
taking over
"spiritual kudzoo"
none could tame

extinguish your dealings
with petty rage
of another imperfect being's mouth
cancer vanishes easier
with early detection
MOVE ON!
or at least learn
from your polar opposite 


Details | Free verse | |

love grows up

Resentment slumbered deep inside of his soul
	Christ echo’s the words to love and forgive 
Anger is deadly one day taking its toll

A child hurt and always betrayed
By those who should protect, nurture, and groom
  He’s grown up angry, and somewhat frayed

Relationships so delicate, precious and fragile
	A young boy inside, he ran to hearts
He leaped and bound through each so agile 

Four walls erected to keep out the hurt. 
	No woman could reach him, and many had tried
His words as sharp as obsidian and curt

He wanted to love but never knew how
	Then came a friend and demanded some time
He opened a book ‘the time has come; the moment is now’
 
The story of Jesus would change his whole life
	Forgiveness was given by the blood of Christ
To learn of forgiveness and faith without strife

Today I am open to help and to love
	God showed me mercy, forgiveness and grace
My wife is an angel sent from above 



Details | Free verse | |

That Secret Place

Jesus Christ is my only Peace.
It is through Him my thoughts find rest.
When death or darkness show its face,
I take my soul to that secret place.
While hiding in the love of God,
I find my way to faith from above.
That is where my sorrows melt.
His love breaks through the darkest day.
When friendships tug on my heartstrings,
When money finds an empty bin,
When hope sinks down to deep despair,
I pray to God…
He is always there.
When rambling thoughts race through my brain,
When life is void of joys sweet flame,
I ask my Lord to keep me safe.
My soul can feel His strong embrace.
No matter what earth life may bring,
My God takes care of everything.
And when I feel like a silly flake,
Or ask the Lord, my soul to take,
I find great strength from God above:
To carry on with agape…love,
To help a neighbor when life is sad,
Or ease some hunger, sharing bread.
All of nature is a special gift.
Made for man in his web of life.
Greater still is the gift from God.
The sacrifice that was made for love…
Jesus Christ, Father’s only begotten
I accept salvation; God forgiving sin.
Through Him mankind has learned good ways.
Now, joy from heaven shines each day.
Amen



Details | Free verse | |

Drunk in the City of Angels

Drunk in the lost city,
lost in the vase beauty of the angels
drunk, smoking on park benches.

Freaks, trannys, whores and pimps,
looking at me;
a one of a kind.

No one has ever seen me on the streets of L.A.,
beacause I am a one of a kind,
a gentleman, a drunken buffoon.

I hurl myself at the bars,
and the whores look at me and smile,
and I wave them over, and they come.

40 bucks for a night a good fun,
a night of exotic pleasure,
in the heart of the sleeping angels.

Drunk walking,
two in the morning,
police stop me, sleeping on a park bench.

Warm always warm,
never cold,
the city that is lost.

A city known as the city of angels,
yet how many devils I have counted.
How much evil I have seen,
how much temptation rules in the gutters.

Walking drunk on madness,
in this dirty city,
as I look for a bar before last call.

I find one,
I go in,
order a beer.

I drink with pleasure
I start to write,
I light a cigarette and smoke.

A grey cloud forms around me,
"Last call for alcohol," the barkeep shouts.
I raise my hand, he comes over.

"What will yah have?" he asks,
"Another beer and my check."
On the house, free drinks, on the house.

After a night in the city of angels,
I find myself a cosy park bench,
and fall asleep, dreaming of the angels I had never seen.


Details | Free verse | |

Glimmers of hope

The candles we light in honor of your name
Reflect the brightness you gave to our lives
Burn away at the darker side surrounding
Giving way to freedom's path for your spirit
Helping bring healing to the hearts that miss you
Binding you in mind, faith and prayer
So your memory can live on and bring comfort
To those that walk in hope, with you beside them


Details | Free verse | |

Bleaching my guilt

The room is dark 
Because, I turned off the light
I sit in the middle of my room
I can see everything in black

I feel the guilt, wanting to get out of my chest
I'm guilty, Guilt is eating me up
Guilty for letting my self down like this
Guilty I can't sleep or rest

I bleach myself so hard
Hoping for my regret to go away
Then I get my bottle of wine
Guilt is taking over my world

I close my eyes trying not to see 
then i see with my head 
I try not to think
But, my heart won't set me free

I wonder if I will ever let go 
I wonder if forever I will be asking the word WHY?
I try to find answers for being stupid
But, I know some day I will get myself through

I take a sponge and keep bleaching
Because, It is bothering me in and out side
I bleach myself hoping to be clean again
But, Dirt is stuck, keeps me far from reaching


After hours of deep thoughts and tears
My heart is feeling softer now 
I feel like a human again and I forgive myself
I'm no more scared to meet my fear




Details | Free verse | |

Obama

I'm not sure how youre going to lead your people to salvation
gang bangers holding the bag, perpetrating violence
i can't help what i think about that predicament
blackmailed, or all rap artists truly do like being the figure heads 
of community terrorism
fighting for their rights throughout history
just to throw it all away
raised to believe they were the only ones whose legacy is a nightmare
but they make money rubbing their guns and drugs in our face
selling other people to blackmarkets for slavery
to make more chemicals

I truly hope you take this opportunity to lead your people in the right direction
to truly be able to find themselves
i'm only one person on the outside looking in
i just truly dont believe all those money making rap artists
truly desire to continue the cycle of violence
i myself believe some sick racist paid them to throw themselves away

Drugs and guns
\kids killing kids
something has to be done
and why your people are the ones representing this
I truly believe another black man can encourage his fellows of skin
to see the bright side, work on solving the problem from now on instead of making it worse

I can't handle much more of this
seeing people fight for their rights
and lose to themselves again
being part of the solution of the problems they are soo upset about
is more understandable than being paid to be the front lines of genocide
and continue the never ending cycle of hate and confusion
I'm not fooled by what has happened to them, and what is
but change is inevitable, solving their own problems they probably were entrapped with

War crimes on both sides
the black and white
minds cornered by previous experiences just want to end this nightmare
or maybe i'm wrong
maybe the racists over there are right
maybe they didnt see how someone made them think one thing
and used violence to enforce actions cornering the hate again
in the end war crimes on both sides
i just urge you to find a solution to this
i myself am tired of the psychological fight of a futile civil war 
engulfing both sides of the unfortunate paradox
its harder than you realise to see through it
its harder not to get wrapped up in my own emotions of the past that was and the present 
that is

Manipulative people brainwashed the innocent
and then used violence against your people to prove that they are justified
its a sick game obama
its disgusting and the streets of your own society need a solution to a dirty trick


Details | Free verse | |

ONE

1

Hello Guitar!
Hello Gutter!
Hello ME!
WE ARE ALL ONE!

Sandy


Details | Free verse | |

Forgive

Forgive,
let the anger leave.
Be Free!
How amazing this world would seem.
Don't let the enemy's words taunt you,
or the past pain eat at your heart,
but open up,
see,
believe,
once you forgive,
you will be free.
Your wings will span,
worship will be truly complete,
the pain of anger and hatred,
healed,
your soul cleaned.
Just forgive and believe.


Details | Free verse | |

The Sun Rose Again - Part Three

                                              Maybe??!!


Details | Free verse | |

Why We Will Never Say Hello or Good-bye

Why We Will Never Say Hello or Good-bye
By Ingrid Showalter Swift 
Rake your fine fingers across my tender lips...
waiting with the hunger that years have made.
...Do you still hear me? 
I am off in a land of daisies and flowers, of many colors.
I walk down sandy paths of pale soft skin... that I imagine 
are yours 
The water-butter beneath my finger tips 
is your skin as well 
and I look out across a far away horizon and know 
you live there
breathing on, in unison with arms open to the sky 
You beam as the sun... I weep as the waves.
I ache and bend and cry out in labor pain 
There is no separation... but the heart still seems to seep 
with it. 
I can see your eyes 
and in my eyes still dark and far away 
...you drift quietly on a raft bobbing in a safe cove
The night still shifts to the wetted calm of us from time to time 
and I know the trees and dogs can feel us moving 
beneath the surface, like mermaids
Our tails are webbed jewels of gold and myrrh
Our fingers are intermingled... our cells combined...
Our torsos are sleek and clean 
We separate... dip and dive like porpoises...
They know... I know they know... and hear our ever calls 
and weep 
and bow 
and weep 
and dive for us 
in the still of twilight’s dancing diamonds
Why not? I cry... but know all too well the answers 
Because there are flowers on our paths
and children playing in the skin of the sand 
and we are one in our purpose 
and one in the words and one as they fly over head - wing to wing...
As autumn climbs the hill to winter...
we will be in the flickering light of fire side 
and the warmth of the soups that brew 
and are handed one to the other 
and we will ever be in the sawdust 
and in the creation of anything new
and in time as it flows back and forth with the tide
Nothing can ever sever us from the ants 
and the shells 
and the mail that arrives in the mail box 
Do you know that we are only a car ride away from forever?
Do you know that we are nothing more than one phone call apart?
...just seven numbers apart! 
and it will remain the distance of forever because we know 
how fine the sand feels between our toes 
how smooth the wind blows over our wet torsos and white sails 
and how water splashes into tiny beads of light at the bow
and how the tree grows 
and how the stone feels from the inside 
We will remain alone and surrounded by love 
...because grass is green
God! How I love you! 
Tell me again that you know... tell me... call me... tell me 
...that it is real... that you can hear me 
that I am the same as the child beneath your palm
loved ever, unconditionally
and you are proud of who I am and who I am becoming


Details | Free verse | |

What Must I Do?

God,
what must I do?
How do I show you that I trust you,
want to know the truth?
I have been on my knees,
is that enough for you?
Will your grace truly cover me?
How many times must I confess,
must I try to make up for who I was?
They say just once,
but how could a wretch like me 
find forgiveness from just once?
Do you still look at me
and see the lies,
the thoughts,
my pagan ways?
Do you shake your head,
and tisk tisk at me?
Say child,
you should have just listened to me?
God,
what must I do?
Here I am,
coming to you.
Assure me that just once,
is the truth.


Details | Free verse | |

A Lover's Covenant (for JEW)

Love, you and I, being all love's essence, shall grow old
Older than we are
And yet never be a black hole like an old dead star
And shall invite with candlelight, you and I
The world to dinner or to tea, with some honey from the sky
And they sitting with us, sup with us
To warm their cosmic loneliness away

Love, their leaching eyes will milk us for joy
And thrill more when my stiff pen caress
With a compass of confidence, the nipple of a word on a breast of page
From this point wet with joy
They will hear you read to me, and I shall read to you
Tongue full of poems like a tender picture framed
Lisping the memories under your name
And memories of jealousies dead like Methuselah in our head

Love, perhaps you will tell the flower petal of your tears
Forgiveness no one remembers, for we have no sorrow here
They will ask us how, curious to go to bed
And we shall say that those who said they are sorry never loved
For where forgiveness comes first sorrow never blooms
And you perhaps will me again
That trust grows here, my dear, and forgiveness 
Is just a little dew we use to freshen up the leaves

Then friends shall say good night in peace, and we to bed will go
Nothing between us, not even dusty spread
To shutter us from the melted night
When we shall hear the angels trumpeting our dreams
Unraveling the music that love writes into little streams
O love, sweet shall be the promise of our heart
The tender succulence of lips that fed us this repast
This voice shall wake us, and dew will touch the buttercup
And we shall say, I love you forever
Joy forever of my heart.  





Details | Free verse | |

Unwavering Schedual

 
She carries temptation in her pocket 
With a secret smile, and a subtle beckon
I’ll be damned if I don’t follow 
She drags my world behind her as she walks 
The centerpiece of every portrait 
She shrugs her shoulders as if she doesn’t know 
She wears my agenda like a tea shirt 
She casually says that I COULD spend the night 
As if I may or may not say yes 
One breathe of air is all I get 
Before I’m drowning in her bed
I couldn’t leave to save my life
Even if i wanted to

By Kyle Ezra Kriticos 


Details | Free verse | |

We Were Drunk Once

Movies played but seldom watched
As we entangled on the couch
Intoxicated by each other, we drank wine to clear our heads
Things were simple in those times

You were red-eyed and freshly mangled
I wanted so badly to make you smile and forget her
For a time I think I succeeded 
We were blissful in our distraction
Playing grown up as we discovered each other

Long nights where sleeping was forsaken
We preferred to lie intertwined 
Talking 
Smiling
Laughing
The sun would rise and you would leave, reveling in how the hours had escaped us
Smiling at the pink tinged sky
Only to repeat the process nightly

Then we traded places
I am the red-eyed one, and another tries to help me forget you
Sometimes he succeeds
Perspective feels like a cruel joke
Could have
Would have
Should have

Someday he will have red eyes too
A cycle perpetuated


Details | Free verse | |

The Name of Jesus

Whisper me the sweet sound of freedom,
The sweet sound found in Your Name,
Holy and Heavenly freedom,
All in the Name of Jesus!


Details | Free verse | |

Sister: A Lament

For Maxine


Sister, was there forgiveness for she who bore you?
For us, your siblings and sometime charges?
For all who would not help, but hastened your demise?
The marble coldness of your corpse,
to my touch, is like an electric shock.
The limbs, the torso, with sudden strangeness,
now bear you slight resemblance.
You feared all pain, but died without complaint.
Who can fathom what you felt?
Was there a last, sharp stab?
A welcome to oblivion?
Or even an awareness of your loss?
Or was death no more spectacular
than a tire deflating, slowly,
quietly, unrecognized?
And was that the shame of it?
That your life ended, so early,
so silently, and death
was no extravaganza?


Details | Free verse | |

Schisms and Lapses

Ah the schism, the gap... the once electrically charged space that now, seems to hold only hollowness like a wicker effigy… before the offerings have been placed before the lamb as been brought to slaughter. The line between sanity and insanity blurrs water on glass. Laughter has never been a recourse not for me…taunting a perpetual bridegroom no release from sleepless nights but tears. What soothes my "weary wrinkled soul" naught but tears. Hold back the anger the misused fuel of fools. Waylay the rampant strands of kinder thoughts feed the seedling of understanding pity the blighted hearts. There can be no groom for the withered crone for time has come and wisdom was the choice life the sparkling firmament has reclaimed for your words ... your thoughts have oft called to me at night.


Details | Free verse | |

SCATTERED


EMOTIONS BOUNCE IN THE OCEAN
FEELINGS ENCOMPASS THE CRAVE
CREATING WAVES
A SCATTERED MESS
RIPPLES OF DETEST
SCATTERED FEELINGS EVERYWHERE
TEARS FLOW INTO THE SEA REMEMBER ME
SCREAMING WITH TRANSPARENT SMILES ALL THE WHILE 
PLEADING WITH MIXED UP ENERGY MINGLED WITH MISERY
FOR A RIGHT NOW RESCUE
THIS IS AN EMERGENCY OF DEMAGED EMOTIONS
WITH THE NOTION THAT SOMEONE WOULD HAVE THE COGNITIVE TO SEE
THE PAIN THAT CAUSES THIS DISEASE
W3HILE YOUR ANALYZING MY SOUL IS DROWNING
HEAR THE SLIENT COUGHING....
I PLEAD FOR SOMEONE WITH CAPABILITIES
TO HEAL MY ACHING SOUL WITH THE ENORMOUS HOLE
A SCATTERED MESS.....................................


Details | Free verse | |

A Toy Brings the Ugly Me Out

He sits on top a dusty shelf;
his care when he showed none.
I think you gave me your
unwanted gifts.
And yet this
the only thing
you gave my family,
better than a beating.
I forgive you because
you are a fellow human,
but I hate you.
I hate how you remind me
that my family is jealous.
I hate how I have to hold
onto you; I don't want you.
You old, dusty,
boxed race truck;
I don't want you.


Details | Free verse | |

Defined by Love

The way you feel
about me doesn't
define me. You will
not cause me to
re-think my
priorities or
examine my virtues.
You may love, like,
hate or be neutral
towards me, that is
your prerogative. Of
course I would
prefer to be looked
upon as good,
inspiring, or any of
the positive human
characteristics we
know of... but it's
not essential to me
if I am not. I
respect your opinion
either way. More
importantly, I
respect mine. In my
eyes I AM worthy of
love, friendship,
forgiveness,
empathy,
understanding,
praise, blessings,
God's Love and love
for myself and I can
only hope for
"genuine" to precede
all of these words
and their meaning. I
understand that
these things I need
in my life, and they
are also the essence
of me, my gift to
those who really
know me and love me,
who truly desire to
be a part me, not
just tolerate me or
see an opportunity
for achievement at
my expense. I have
come this far on a
road paved of my
blood, sweat and
tears and the
admission of my
faults that made it
so. Many lessons I
learned were harsh
but I managed to
proceed in the right
direction and it was
I who suffered and
bowed my head with
shame and it was I
who rose, anew,
forgiving and
forgiven, humbled
and eager to forge
ahead. And the few
that were with me
all the while, will
forever be a part of
me, we are one and I
acknowledge I would
not be where I am,
who I am this day,
without you. And I
will always love
you. It is my
ambition and honor
to give to you the
same beautiful,
selfless gift. I
walk with God, in
good company of
those that chose to
walk with me in this
amazing life's
journey. And that,
is all I need to
know as to what
defines me, as a
person, a blessed,
cherished soul,
grateful for every
single moment.


Details | Free verse | |

MY SALVATION

My life was heading nowhere fast on a road to my destruction. Everything I had was taken from me. I was left with completely nothing. The little hope I had for a future vanished from my aching head. Finally I came to a conclusion just wishing I was dead. I can’t take anymore I cried aloud not expecting anyone to hear. Then a voice like no other said, “My dear child, I’m near.” “Who’s speaking to me?” I replied out of pure ignorance. “I am the Lord Almighty. There is no other like me With any significance. I created the heavens and the earth And everything that dwells on them. If you believe these words I speak, and that I sacrificed My one and only Son I will renew your strength, and you shall soar on wings as an eagle And be my chosen one.” In reply I cried, “Lord I believe! Please come into my heart!” Hence, His spirit rested upon me -And I was pulled out of the dark. I now had every reason to go on living joyfully For I am God’s creation Accepting His gift which cannot be bought, MY SALVATION!


Details | Free verse | |

word morph - GIFT to ROSE

I bring to you, my love, this GIFT
To ask forgiveness, for allowing this RIFT
The mistakes I’ve made, I know are RIFE
From on my knees, I humbly RISE
And tender my love, in the form of this ROSE


Details | Free verse | |

sorry for the dirty laundry mom


I'm not wearing underwear
I can’t afford to clean my clothes
I shower every day
and sensitive skin from soap and psoriasis makes me itch
But I have bills to pay
I know you understand
Raising my little half brother and half sister
I've only met once
who are an ocean away
But this isn’t my story, it's yours
and the memories that remain

I know we've talked about it
Your pain and mine
About dad an alcoholic, and the abuse
and how you’re still attracted to it
But I still remember soo many nights
And soo many strange days

You dragged by your hair
I'll never forget
You thrown through the door
is embedded in my head
You with black eyes
you fell out of bed
The screaming 
The fights
I remember everything said
My name 
My brother’s name
Psychological abuse for you
soo long ago mom
You left and I don’t blame you
Years of you being cheated on
And dad would introduce us to his girlfriends
Easter holidays treasure hunt
While your husband was out betraying everyone

I know you know
That he talks poorly about you
And acts like the better man
But mom I remember
and you need to understand
What you went through
And the nights when I heard the door slam close
because you were fighting
and he told you to leave
That was how I met god in a sense
and always prayed for you to come back
Then finally I prayed for you sanity safety and for you to leave
And I would cry
as quietly as I could
cry myself to sleep
and chances are
dad either fell asleep
or went out in his drunken stupor 
to cheat on you again

The divorce is over
It’s been over for years 
But yet its still messy and I bite my tongue and remember
The night you came into my room
And told me you had to leave
I remember taking beer to kindergarten
Hiding it from you and dad
To throw it away
And my teacher in grade three finally asked
No lie mom
I had the same teacher in kindergarten and grade three
I could write an entire poem
about all of the people who shaped my mind
But I need you to see
When I come visit and am called an incest family man by your boyfriend
for giving you a hug
You’ve fallen into the same trap
And it’s like my own mother I’m not allowed to love







Details | Free verse | |

SUCH HASTE, SUCH WASTE


Brother, why the haste
why are you so quick to bail
how life has made you frail
why art thou so lean in faith


Desires of sodom, you chase
till you wear and rot to waste.
The truths of life you dare not face
you cower behind the shell of race
and bequeath to it,the fortune of your days


Oh Sister, why the haste
this phase you crave
is soiled with fray
this course you chart
is fraught with chains


Are you numb to the flames;
that chars the face with pains
that lays in wait, in ways
unseen to sight and gaze


You fill your pate with tales of hate
and lose your fate in pits of vale


The weight of your plate
is filled with kills of kin
why the haste, brother
why the waste, sister?


Details | Free verse | |

asking

All the things you should know
All the swings you’ve taken on me
But haven’t noticed at all
And there goes the things you won’t know

Can’t you see all I got to tell you?
Can’t you tell just by the sound of my steps?
And as it seems you won’t notice at all
And I won’t tell you, not now, not tomorrow

Till you notice what have you done
How does that stomping on my dreams
Dragging all I know down
What I thought was concrete now is just flour on the floor.

So by now all I got to tell you
Is, ask me please
Just the right time, the right words and everything fine.
And it seems that here I’ll be for eons

With all this around me
And you don’t seem to care
You don’t care at all
With my broken past, and you can’t see it 

And there it goes my hope
Within this forest I don’t see a way out
And guarding what’s left it’s all I have.

And still you don’t care.

~Anna


Details | Free verse | |

Freedom in Love

Keeping my head up, treading water
Cut throat surviving, struggling
Going under, death visits
Will to live, tested!
Selfishness Vs Selflessness
A Greater Love, encompasses me
God demonstrating mercy, for his children
Learning about forgiveness, cultivating, inner faith
Melody of Love, one can experience
In the darkest, waking hours, of everyday living
Self survival, learning how to live
Peace of Mind, Peace of Heart
Peaceful Spirit, Freedom in Love


Details | Free verse | |

deep-dark-hollowed heart

I stand 
I wait
I worried
for the things that may not happened

I hope
I pray
I cried
longing for a peaceful heart

All I wanted is...
when i close my eyes I won't feel afraid
and when I open my eyes, a smile will appear 
coz today i breathe again

in a deep-dark-hollowed heart
like living as a sinner
like walking around in a forest finding a way out
God, released me from this feeling...

Nobody wants to feel alone
like a stranger in a crowded place
take me to a home where love can hold me
to a nice sleep when the night comes

I am lost so find me
I cry so hug me
I am lonely so love me...


Details | Free verse | |

Life Can Be Cruel

I cannot get into heaven
God I have tried!
Suicide is a double edge sword
Especially when you survive!
Walking the streets at night
Dazed and confused
Longing to be loved
Wondering...
When is Mum, coming for me?

"Does she still love me?"
"Does she still care?"
"Does she still think of me?"
"Does she wonder, where I am?"

I want her to come find me
I want her to say she 'loves me’
I want her to comfort me
I want her to take me home
And keep me safe
And not forget hat I exist
Like the way she treats me now

I wish God 
Could make my Mum
Magically appear
Making this hellish nightmare
On the street
Disappear!

“Send my Mum please!”
So, all this can end!
Before this last ray of hope
Diminishes for good!

I don’t want to become
The walking dead
Forever forgotten as if 
I was never born!
For this is the cruel, harsh reality
Of living life, feeling unloved
Uncared for, abandoned,
Left to fend for my own

A dangerous killer inside me
Eating away, at my soul
Something, no one can see
As I suffer in silence
My insides crippling!

Lost, alone and frightened
Weeping on a dirty
Graffiti park bench
Dirty tears
Rolling down my cheeks
Stuffing newspapers under my jumper
To keep myself warm

“What am I going to do?”

“Will I make it through the night?”
“Will I get raped and beaten?”
"Will I be left for dead?”
“Will I survive
To see another day?

“Is my life worth living?”

Please God, I beg of you
Have mercy now
Please show me the way!


Details | Free verse | |

Remains Of A Driveway

Through you I seek to know:
What happened once below?

You ferns of resistance, I see you
Mixing it upward with 
A firm stance. 
(Such steely green weeds
Do smirk indeed
Above the empty path of horizon’s eye,
Blackened to nowhere).

What, though, do I see in you?

(A path lies vacant and wanting,
A land once named upon a dream;
A barren place now daunting,
Neglected and unseen).

Where is your truth?

(Does it rest within your clumsy bud’s dance
With a tertiary sky,
Or a raucous from your stem’s windward need 
To lead)?

Oh No.

I do believe:
It is your roots of defiance!

To know Home in no shame;
To forge through scarred soil with no blame!

Such courage you have:
To reap the shifting tar of fickle men, 
And safely hasten away 
From the notion of never again!

(Thirty some years have stood and fell
Yet…
Your quiet presence lives to tell
This hell,
Once known,
As Love’s canal).  

Oh eager green,
 I wish you well.


Details | Free verse | |

A Friend With Consequences

I'll shine brighter than ever when I find my way past my woes the farther I wander the more I shall know that I'm a friend with consequences and only one could let that go He somehow convinced me that I needed correction now I know where I'm going for I followed his directions no more full of blaming I point it right at my nose and realize all my problems are by no one else controlled Will I ever shine with a destiny, kind I still have little meaning but he is there with me, sometimes when our doors have been locked up for so many years it feels good to have someone come in my circle, share my fear Everyone so full of hatred afraid of letting us by even when we're most broken still a spark in our eye you think that would tell them that we just want to live life to the fullest potential that our dreams aren't denied We talk of good and evil agreed on right and wrong tell tales of when we struggled and what we did to be strong as the world the he's seen is darker than mine I am less respected as a person but I accept that, it's fine for he talks to me like I'm worthy and proud to be my friend that's why I could never replace all the treasured words of wisdom he gave me like a story of survival, rise and fall though I am a friend with great consequences I could never begin to replace him, at all my personal Jesus, I see the great Messiah in him I hope one day to inherit his good heart to pass it on to some kid one day, struggling.


Details | Free verse | |

A Woman Created By Law and Men

The twelve were coming in …, 
twelve like gods, with sealed fates.
Mortals with keys to death and dungeons of hell, 
where devils walked in numbers, and are owned; 
they are someone’s belongings. I could not see me.
That place is it where there is blood without formed elements … 
or nutrients. Colors became significant (blue and red).
We know of the black and white barriers; 
the ones we pretend do not breathe in Washington. 
Brothers and a nation are built behind steel bars.

The thought of that woman, 
the woman that stands bold 
with torch beckoning to come and taste the dream, 
is like a haunted house, and I, a little child of three.
How she defends self-government 
while she’s trapped at sea. Freedom is a long way …
Liberty is far-flung, 
but I must not lose what is left of free will.
When the verdicts are festooned, 
they ought to downgrade the others;
there should be no rivalry. 
Without such it is simple to mislead the bulk.


I am my better half; 
I come clean without boasting on my tongue.
I often wondered if Hilary plagues … 
because she believes she has a better hand, 
or is there absolute amnesty. 
This thought I contemplate to summon sleep
 instead of counting sheep. 
The guy who swings the three iron, I often think of his wife; 
how her shoes were on to run. Was it hurt are shame?
Love is far too shallow to be called love.


I shall kill her, 
and set her in the depth, 
where she will be eaten by her conscience; 
sometimes I questioned if there’s one. 
Maybe one is near, but suppressed.
I must kill her 
with this ball-point that poured out the contents
of a lamenting soul; she must go before she is far gone. 
Is the law a crooked device,
 a mean provided for some to get even?
Who suffers when she cried wolf?
Hell is the amount of her condescension.
She has to die, to live anew, 
and to allow the halves to live.


Details | Free verse | |

Casting Stones

I carry in my pocket a simple reminder to me

A single stone; it is nothing special on its own

It bears the weight of truth that each of us in earnest

must embrace.

For if we would stop to think we all have made mistakes.

Before we hasten to judgment remember the stone we throw

May bear the weight of the sin we ourselves own.

So stop and think, what would you do if this stone was thrown at you? 


Details | Free verse | |

An unravelling of time

Time
Is a measure of existence
Where we all play our part
Looking back and looking forward
We live so much and imagine so much
Sketching life on our minds and our hearts
Sometimes we break 
And we think we are- Irreparable
But somehow -
We move through time 
Changing and shaping 
This way and that – from darkness to light
Shedding off the old 
Birthing the new into existence – we didn’t know was beyond-Times portals
Here we explore the supernatural world of promise- at the Kings command
We enjoy a Kingdom of priceless worth - it outshines times wrappings 
Time that is slowly unraveling
Being discarded on the pile -
Of a past life.

© Brenda V Northeast 30th August 2012


Details | Free verse | |

Louder Then Words

paper hearts can never foil 
the obvious from happening 
you speak of despair 
like you come 
from a place of happiness 
you fuel me 
like the water liquor burns 
we move 
like the fire of hearts 
young and torn 

after all you're left for dead
you better off coming off your meds
the sweetest thing you said to me
is actions speak louder than words

i'm no longer yours to forgive or forget 
living like cliches 
the secret is to forgive and forget
counting down the days 
the minutes you mark 
i'll be here when the hours are dark 
roaming like children 
screaming of riddles in the park
easy like noah never parked his ark 
gritty like paper hearts 
we never fold 
the sweetest thing i was ever told 
"actions speak louder then words" 

after all you're left for dead
you better off coming off your meds
the sweetest thing you said to me
is actions speak louder than words

i'm no longer yours 
to forgive & forget
i'm no longer yours 
to live with regret


Details | Free verse | |

Soy Sauce Spills

Soy sauce drains 
Into the white, clustered rice
Stepped on…
spills . . . 
Soy sauce taints
The whiteness of the grain
 It slips out of my hands
No use...no point in crying out in rage
Though I was starving, 
I'll just eat another thing and start on a new page

I'm hungry like a swine
I wish I can earn back my snack!
I'm as angry as a bull
I'm about ready to attack! Attack!
Soy sauce packages
Fall unto the dirty school ground
Stepped on
By bratty, conceited teens
They really need to eat their greens
Instead of junkfood and pizza
They should drink some water
Instead of drinking sugary drinks or
 Sucking on popsicles obnoxiously
Why did the soy sauce spill? Seriously....


Details | Free verse | |

Worship





I stand before Him
    joined hands, eyes closed
with a heart full of hopes
    a 'Navkar' on my lips
A mere mortal- me, praying,
    asking, beseeching blessings
A little bit from his bountiful of grace.
    A life, no matter how short in measure
One filled with warmth of true love,
    vitality of health and virtue of peity.
For me, mine and all His Creation around.


I stand before Him
     head covered for worship
Anoint Him with saffron-sandalwood 
    lowering my eyes with gratitude
singing praises to Him, each minuscule
    particle of my being
Blessed I feel to be born and cared for
    in His Divine Providence.
Thanking the Lord for bestowing me
    all I could have desired
and much more.


I kneel before Him
    touching my head to His feet
begging for pardon, a repenting sinner
    performing penance from within the heart
Forgive me Lord for the grave and
    frivolous mistakes and umpteen sins
I committed knowingly-unknowingly.


Standing here, bowing my head to God
    one last sacred motive
freedom from the cycle of 
    birth-death-re birth!


13/09/2012
For Debbie Guzzi's  STAND contest




*Navkar mantra:  a chant of nine lines, prayer of Jainism
 Right now the Jain festival of Paryushan is being celebrated. It has a duration of eight days. All devotees perform worship of God by anointing statues with paste of saffron-sandalwood, fasting and doing penance for the sins. On the last day of the festival people join hands and ask for forgiveness to one another, for anything they have done to others that might have caused hurt during the whole year.


Details | Free verse | |

The Light

They praise me like a saint,
But I am a sinner;
They don't know the man they see.
I am an addict.
Broken eyes to pornography,
Only Jesus can set me free.
Only by His death on the cross
And the grace of His Father's love
Am I able to be set free.
With God as The Light,
The One and Only Light,
The Only Hope in sight,
Will I be set free.
I am free.


Details | Free verse | |

I Forgive You Father

To you I was probably a mistake !!
mom's pregnancy was no piece of cake,
but God did what it takes -
for me to be born.

I didn’t come in form of a rose,
but instead I was a pinching thorn,
without any value nor purpose -
just like a piece of corn.
But Christ’s grace was sufficient for me to be born

I was named after you...
I have your eyes, your hair, your lips.
I am the reflection of your youth.

I hated it  when people compared me to you.
I hated your habits;
all your addictions. 
I hated  you..

Mom left me before turning six,
and you left me when i was twelve -
even when mom left I felt all by my self.

In my teen years I was desperate -
looking for love.
So I became an outlaw thug,
but in the heart...
I was in need of a fatherly hug.

I needed  discipline, instruction, and advise -
instead you gave me a cold shoulder,
and a heart made out of ice.

I felt more comfort from the roaches and mice,
than turning into a man whose life was full of vice.
Nothing was hidden from me!!
I was looking right through your eyes.

But now you have Christ..
So we share something in common -
that love is not a feeling,
but a choice we both made -
when praying and kneeling.
Forgive me Lord...prayer surpassing the ceiling.

I forgive you,
just like Joshua forgave me.
and I love you,
just like God loved me.
and I will die for you!!
just like the Messiah  die for me.

I love you Dad, and I forgive you.


Details | Free verse | |

Sit Oboe, Sit Nice For Karma

Come one come all cam one holds her tall cam two lights and all four horses trollop 
away in the night. Alive at five Adult mind Winders shall perform a demonstration a 
subscription based presentation on their aggressive fertilization Freed to breeze, 
free to roam lost yet watched, aped and treated as apes are the hurt and innocent 
seeking solace in corrections for already karma cashed errors while the Neanderthal 
pre punished by genetics zig zaggin zoo masters frantically scoop our poop faking 
real for the next. When everyone knows, is it still a painting or an adult rendered 
fridge ornament of disgrace? Hmmm either way or neither way I will continue to lie 
here and allow my masters to push forth with the sucking of my aped banana 
while in a hammock I rest.


Details | Free verse | |

White Dove

Above...
rain and thunder
starts to upset the stomach of a now souring sky
as it prepares itself to release a few tears
upon those seeking truth for their lies
in the distance
a white dove cries

The thunder strikes up a conversation
clapping rudely
during the rains flawless audition
i stand amid not to be judged
but to be cleansed by this gift
by my own remission
to fear
means knowing how to love
in the distance it cries
the white dove

Those, who seek out these healing waters
peace, they shall find
but the lost refuse to drink
and prefer to gargle from the man-made pool
of illusion and lies
sadly, they never learn to fear
in the distance
a white dove cries


Details | Free verse | |

Just the beginning

Regret… My reply to "HE"; a poem written for me by SOS!

Where to begin… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I enjoyed you immensely even back then You meant more to me than just a friend The closer we became The more I felt it would end… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We always had fun Never thought about the long run No commitments to each other Yet we were more than friends... We were lovers… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Too good to be true... Just look at the clues Remember "no expectations" Remember we are "just cool" Remember these were our rules... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We both had issues and I didn’t think twice I was soft and gentle offering wisdom, experience, and advice Personal experience reminded me of the pains in your life I knew something was wrong... I felt something was just not right... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ But we had nothing to lose No future in sight How I wish you trusted me I needed you to shed some light… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ What were you feeling How were you dealing That your heart needed healing Revealed what you were concealing… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Left to answer these questions on my own Left in the dark all alone Left with the door cracked in “Danger Zone” Left with fear of the unknown... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ FEAR TOOK MY HAND AND LEAD ME TO ROAM... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I’d been hurt just a short time before My heart was hiding behind steel doors Somehow you cracked it and let fear in Fear is powerful and fear did win... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THANKFULLY THIS WAS JUST THE BEGINNING... THIS WAS NOT OUR END... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Only time will tell if our wounds are healed Little by little we break the seal's of fear Little by little we open up and reveal What’s in our hearts and what we truly feel… ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We have learned from the mistakes of our past Taken a new direction; created a new path Neither one of us is hiding behind a mask This time will be better... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THIS TIME I HOPE IT WILL LAST... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Lay


Details | Free verse | |

Disturbingly So

Where is the love? Where is the hugs?
It's a family meltdown, disturbingly so.
Adult children who think life is all about them.
Pent up emotions, anger and frustrations,
Petty disagreements, throwing away one another
Like paper products thrown in the dump.
Preferring a hug from their pets than each other.

It makes me sad to hear so many families feuding.
But today, seriously, give family your love and even a hug.
Communicate softly and listen to each other's view,
Even when it's hard and still healing from the hurts done.
Let's not allow another family member to pass on without forgiving.

"Talk is cheap, communication is priceless"



Quote from Patricia Lees


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness

Can you forgive someone who has stolen your life?
A person with full faculties of the knowledge that
they have invaded your every ounce of pureness.
With only the craving of self gratification, with no
concerns of the damage inflicted upon the naive victim.
Life as you have known it to be is no longer, therefore,
the changes require extensive mind and body alterations.
Not given a choice confuses the brain to believe this
person deserves and should receive the same destruction.
Then you ponder the satisfaction of their demise only
to feel ashamed when you get enjoyment from the thought.
Seeking the answer deep down in your soul while
struggling with the transformation of your future life, 
you ask yourself if this person is worthy of the
compassion that is required to mend your sufferings.
The only answer that can possibly ease the curing
process of this human err, however intentional, must 
be divine forgiveness to begin your inner self healing.
Yes, you can forgive what you shall never forget.


Contest: "To Err Is Human, To Forgive Divine"


Details | Free verse | |

Sabbath Morning Rap sequence 1

Learn not too late to halt the hate,
Bound to be ground in the dust of disgust
We're pierced and fierce, fulla rings and things
We're blued and tatooed and God is booed.

Crude dudes are misconstrued
with actions vulgar,vile and lewd.
We're found down ground in sound,
totally tatooed in terrible taste,
in a mindless race for the loudest base.

Hate to dis your myth but God exists,
'Tis a truth deduced by the less obtuse,
You understand He did become man
For His love of us all because of the fall.

He suffered and died being crucified,
He pulled His people from the pains of hell
and rose from the dead He's alive and well,
I tell you no lie He's got no rival,
It's right there written in the holy Bible.

He arose to heaven so to send the Spirit
to His brothers and sisters who wished to hear it,
He said I leave you my Love I leave you my all
but you gotta say yes to heed my call.

Don't follow the world that ain't the place,
You want to be with Me when you finish this race,
Orphans you're not  you have been taught,
I will help you find Me if I'm sought.
                  
                       Amen


Details | Free verse | |

Light To Dark

You think you’ve gone just far enough,

I could smile knowing you’ve gone far enough that you can’t go back again

You think you were careful but,

I’ve caught a glimpse of your true, wretched form

You think you can find a way into my good graces

I’ve seen what you are, monsters with a friendly costume

You can’t deceive me anymore and, I don’t consort with serpents

You think I’m a game to be played but, trust me, you could never win

Don’t underestimate me

You think I’m a joke but, trust me you won’t be laughing

You think I’m just talking myself up but, trust me, you’re the ones going down

My eyes took too long to adjust

Better late than never

It may take a monster to know one but, I promise my teeth are sharper than yours

My first reaction to the hideous revelation that was your form was to weep

Fall to my knees, maybe even wretch my heart from my chest and onto the carpet

Then I thought about the mess it would make

I decided the only blood that will spill, will be your own

I was not weak, but I had a weakness

A heart of soft gold stitched to my sleeve with care

No longer

Now my heart is a stone so heavy

I could kill at least two birds at once 

Being the nice guy is a thing of the past 

Thanks for freeing me of that softness

You thought I was all sunshine and delicate things

When really I had just been swallowing razor blades

Now that sun is setting and I hope you see it was you who were wrong

Can you feel my darkness coming, because it’s eager to hold you

If you thought I was the one who would just stand still or turn to run

Your gonna be the one with tired feet

I’m not sad anymore

Just sick with the plague of your lies

Contagious, and I’m looking for someone to kiss

Even angels can make themselves wicked

When we do, we take no prisoners

Still think I’m a game

This one is just beginning


Details | Free verse | |

This Is The Love

Stand up and shake;
Feel the rhythm in your heart.
Ignite those pants;
We get up and dance.
God on our mind,
Eternity in our souls;
Feel the chills of those bones.
It's the hope.
Open those closed doors:
Into Heaven we go,
Welcomed and forgiven.
Here is the love;
Let's dance!


Details | Free verse | |

I FORGIVE YOU

In the darkness of a cold stormy night
You snuffed out the little flame of my life
Why did I let go without a try
May be the abandoned infant in me could no longer cry

Despite all the wisdom from your age you gained
Beating this little child, to you was fair game
How could I protect myself when I was so frail and thin
You put an end to my story before it could begin

I had the face of an angel and like a feather I weighed
But I was your nemesis, so your cruel heart said
With swollen lips I cried helplessly through the night
But the world tuned away without pitying my plight

I hope you are happy with your accomplishment
May God reward you, not deliver punishment
Although I am a little child,I pray for you
I have a large heart, I forgive you


Details | Free verse | |

These Walls I Built

Stuck in the prison of my own life,
I dodge behind these walls I built.
And inside is a demon covered in guilt
And shame so thick you can't see his eyes.
God, please help me to see
No matter what, You will always love and be with me.
Thank You Father for everything.
In Jesus' Name,
We pray.
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

Every Second We're Away

Every second we're away,
We grow stronger everyday
Until that day will finally come
When we know it's okay
And we will rest in each other's arms
In peace from God above,
No longer missing one another
Because we're together;
Built forever in each other's love.


Details | Free verse | |

Sweet Children, Sleep

To the Newtown Children

A poet cries with broken heart

Look thine hearts be washen clean with death,
God knows how hastily can be
By an unfitting goodly young man
Become just another evil’s killer.
Take thou no mean of life
That so tenderly and small
Arranged now along that cold room
Where a hundred of parents
Like you and I look on poor children that thou think:
One day they shall be a doctor or a thinker like us.
To understand really why the hungry death
Has to do for their final journey in front of this sickness?

O, children! American children! My children!
I warn thee in all my heart and soul
That could not happen so earlier on life
And where thou cast the peace and saint in the kindness of grace
Take care of them from danger, thou take for a leaf
And makes my heart bleeding every one like us become angry
How in this heavenly nation this massive fate could occur?

Hold me fast in thine embrace God,
Where my despair cannot be silenced,
Let you and me and everyone else to knee and cross
Our fingers against our chest and pray for them,
Give them, Lord, thy blessing give,
Pray for them and mother as well,
And I shall finish this poem with trembled
Fingers and tears cascading over this bloody
Sheet as an awaken wind has just blown it from me.


Details | Free verse | |

The Piano Stand

I was sitting at the piano stand,
cracking my hands, getting ready to play,
when a man walked in, no one knew who,
he was, because no one had seen him in a while.

He sat in a chair, his hair so blonde and long as could be,
my hand touched the piano key,
I realized it was my dad not that it was bad,
just why was he here, i can't bare to see his face.

I stopped playing,
I started saying,
How mad i am for his fame,
He walked out of the school in shame.

I wondered why he was famous and what for,
He left me and my brothers to be poor,
For some other.

I can never forgive him,
but i'll let him live on in his fame,
for i have nothing to shame.
For i knew he would not claim,
me as a daughter or friend.

I moved my hands from the keys on the piano,
for i have moved on to another Piano Stand.


Details | Free verse | |

If We Were Back

Where once we laughed, bent over our middles,
pounding the table, or just smirking with a rueful
“Oh, my God”, sort of way, could I forget the silent beach?

Rustles of sand at my window as you walk off
hands in your pockets after our gazes met one last time
as you checked I remained alive and you had no duty

to fill any more. How could the sand slither so
beneath our feet, like an upturned timer wiping clean
wiping, wiping away our faces, our moisture,

until only the rollers were brave enough to face
me and the sand and the laughter and the quiet
and what had passed away never to return again.

Never the same river or ocean or hands awaiting
the clock of our unmaking until your rueful smile 
no longer smirks at the me that was never there
in your dreaming, and I am made who I am again. Real.

Sheri Fresonke Harper


Details | Free verse | |

Cold ice

Ice flower
so cold I cannot touch
but need forces my exposed finger tips
and i brush them against your crystal petals
and bitten skin comes off willingly
to cling to your cold disregard;

Ice flower
frozen as you are
even this hot desert wind
seeking to slice your bitter air
and melt away droplets of beauty
from your seductive petals
but oh seduction and its lure:
my hot breath comes fervent and warm
but I do not draw back into my lungs cool favor
No, your crystal buds do not yield fresh melt water
to sate this parched throat

No, my breath comes back short, sharp and shivering
As if the unforgiving hand of winter
had battered my very heart away
and the cold wind gusts back into my lungs
and shrouds my heart
slows the pumping of heated blood
and leaves only a brittle casing
of cold ice.


Details | Free verse | |

A Phone Call

Phone rings
I will miss you, will you miss me?
No
No? But I may never see you again
(Feelings too young to understand
My ears grew hot
My face grew hot
My stomach twists
Frustration? Guilt? Probably guilt
I think it was guilt
No. Fear. Most likely fear)
I will miss you
Lies
You are a liar.
You are a liar, Father
You are a liar.
And now I am a liar too.
 
¿Por qué mis sueños se rompen?
 
Is it your fault
I think it was your fault
Maybe mine
Or was it hers
His, hers, mine, yours, its
What possession is to blame?
I blame, I blame, I blame
 
Where are you?
What are you doing?
I will stalk no more
I will stalk no more
I will stalk no more
But I want to know if you are alive
Are you alive?
 
No hay nada más difícil que vivir sin ti
Pero no puedo recordarte y soy muerto
 
I am not bilingual
I am not
 
Did I grow?
Was I supposed to grow?
I sometimes dream that I can fly
The winds carry me through
But sometimes, I forget how to land
With the ground far below my feet
Everyone left behind
I fear that I will drift
Too high
Where it’s cold
And I can no longer breath
And then I awake
 
I am one
I am one
I am two
Sometimes with a smile
But mostly with fear
Anxiety and one
 
Is it my fault?
Is it my fault?
Is it my fault?
Do I let you do what you do
Did and will do
 
Me gustaría conocerte
Mi corazón, mi corazón daña
 
Follow me
Follow me
But keep a foot away
I do not trust you
I trust too much
I never trusted
 
They will find out
All of them
They will know
Will they love you still?
Will they love me?
 
Stop stop stop
stop stop
Why did you stop?
What did I do?
 
¿Hacer a quién?
 
Put down the phone
 
Read me as you will
Read me
Read me
 
You are done
As are these lines.


Details | Free verse | |

MUST PROCEED

Thinking of you always
			   when
Every second interludes 
A past a future when always we
are interrupted by a bitter sweet mention
Of you my love why do we question
all rhetorical for you, for me
love baits good interludes 
the all agonizing ecstasy 
can not dissipate a week a year
for love is longer than our time
				     abstractly
while life is short as bread
	love
		increased?
			       deceased?
why in love do we feast
on the bitter tears we are fed	
to find within a love long and true
though at times bare and brass
cowardly, does not recede
	godspeed,
		godspeed, 
			straight or bow kneed
					this love must proceed


Details | Free verse | |

The Last Great Day

10/13/12
-----------------------------------------

The words of God are a great comfort The day—the Last Great Day—depicts judgement That will come upon everyone equally God hasn’t even begun to work With the mass majority of the world But His glorious salvation is revealed to all But for all to hear, The spiritual component of God Will be added to their thoughts —their ears will open They will have the opportunity to repent There will be judgment For those who really long to change, Doors will be open For those who choose their own way, He will throw into the Lake of Fire with Satan —a most merciful action For any way except God’s is the path leading to evil And in due course to anger, Sadness and death Those who choose to be gone Will be gone Many will weep and mourn… Until the day of Judgment, Prepare Once you receive the knowledge of the truth Practice it For you will be held accountable For your sins God will not overrule our human will He wants us to choose And continue to choose Not all names will be seen in the Book of Life I will be among the weeping
*inspired by John Anderson* -a special thanks to Charles Henderson for helping me edit this piece. It looks so much better now! Thank you!-


Details | Free verse | |

Forever Rider

Bleached bones of a fallen beast, Casting a shadow that points To the east, A cowboy rides out With a noose round his neck, Travelling north on a Perilous trek. The noose is a reminder That his life is not his, Not that he needs it To tell him the truth, He's atoning for sins Committed by him And the noose is just there For some proof. His horse pointing northwards, His spurs jab its flanks, It jumps on a journey It knows not to where, He has been advised If he gets where he must That he must handle all things With great care. Long weeks follow days, He ne'er stops for food, He feels neither hunger, Nor thirst or fatigue, His Horse is the same, Feeling neither hunger or pain, Though they travel on league After league. He stops on the brow Of a mountainous peak, To gain the bearings He felt he had lost. His eyes sweep the plains He travels in vain, Without ever revealing The cost. His life had been shortened For the most part by death, He had suffered For what he had done, His actions alone Had been the sole cause Of the loss of his wife And his son. And so for his torment He had been given a task, That he knew he must Always repeat, There was no respite And no task to be done And his journey would be Never complete. And so he rides on O'er the endless red plain, Destined as ever to Be all alone, And maybe one day His skull will be seen By another as abandoned Bleached bone....


Details | Free verse | |

A True Credo Of Love

(To All Who Believe It Can Be Achieved)


Caucasoid, Mongoloid,and Negroid
Colour the conscience progression 
of Man's ethical Truths...
The cultural aggressions of violence
and ignorance must end!
Extend your heart, hand and life
Towards the Precious Don of Honour...
Freely, keeping the sincere
Brotherly Creed


 

Comments:  Brothers and Sisters it is time that we stand up and let the Love of God in, after 
all we are all one in the same under the skin, so why not give it a grand try... One Love and 
Many Blessings in Him Always, Adell


Details | Free verse | |

''The Fraud''

Teased by the aberration of false tenderness.
Subdued in despair.
The tightened noose around my neck.
I feel as though my last breath is approaching.
Strickened airs' final gasp.
Clear these darkened clouds.
For my anguished,suffered love,I hurt no more.
May the guardian of life now take me home....

For those who have tortured souls.....




Details | Free verse | |

An Empty Illusion

You may not know, as emptiness surrounds you everywhere you go
If you could see behind a different eye,
would it be a friend or a foe?
Pain is smooth at the surface
Triggering the roots from down below
Ceases to hide behind your pride
Following you, as you continue to grow
Glancing upon a broken surface
You hide from your own reflection
You hide from all you know
Emptiness cannot be seen or heard
So you yourself, may never know


Details | Free verse | |

life now

the life that you have now 
is the one you will cry over when you are removed from it 
it happens that many lives are taken 
away from the now and when we lived 
the can’t grow fast enough is bicycle hard to catch up to 
crispy in leaves, and, bare under the bark


Details | Free verse | |

Be the Inspiration

Your mind races when you hear that song
The sun glasses go on 
And the volume goes up
Your foot hits the peddle while imagination races for a medal

Maybe its the melody
Or the singer who makes you feel like a winner
Perhaps the words motivate your inner desire
Which pushes you to let lose sets you on fire

Each of us has a trigger
And we want to be that super hero
The kind that everyone looks up to
But to be the inspiration

You gotta be willing to let go of the illusion
To be that speed racer and come up on top
Look in that rear view mirror 
Ask yourself so why you in such a rush

But then your ego says a…. man it ain’t no big deal everything’s cool 
Your heads bobbing to the beat your hair is flying in the wind
Ya got this view of how everything should be 
But deep in your belly ya got this fear and ya shrug it off like everything’s ok

So you continue on your merry way day after day
Then one day maybe five years later you here that voice again
Suddenly all those emotions come rushing back
But this time you say ok I’m ready to listen

And the message is clear so you change the direction
You start to become the inspiration
People start to praise you for your actions
Then one day you meet this young man whom is stuck in his pride

You offer him guidance you tell him the message
He looks up at you and tears fill his eyes
He just kneels down sobbing from all the hurt
You say it’s ok because “Love is the answer”

Ron Flatow © 2007


Details | Free verse | |

Fear Anger Love

Fear fear fear

Lessons from yesterday haunt - 

demand from tomorrow looms.

No way to escape.

Today is saturated in anxiety.




Anger anger anger

Frustration over inequality.

Malicious throughts cross my mind.

Lashing out in bitter words

because I have no power over this.




Love love love

More than anything you are mine.

Through it all, good and challenging.

Now may be a struggle - yet - 

no matter what we have each other.


Details | Free verse | |

Let Love Fly

Let love fly
-
With ethereal compassion, a soft glow in her eyes,
she picks up the baby eagle, tries to convey words
of eloquent reassurance, sincerely she tries.

Look, June is here this morning; and sun is shining hot; 
last night’s storm belongs to last night; it has left an eagle;
a homeless, hurt, upset baby; it feels forlorn, lost, caught.

She takes it home; makes enclosures; feeds it with love, care.
It still feels solo, alone within, fed by love, fed up.
The enclosure of good concern grows smaller with time’s each turn.
The bird’s soul belongs to the sky; in its eyes silent prayer 
flares up as it cries; shrill piercing call to its own kind.

Let it fly.
=© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar 


Details | Free verse | |

A Small Voice

I see, but I am blind
I hear, but I am deaf
I taste, but all is bland
I touch, but I do not feel
I smell, but the scent is elusive

Our senses conforming to the world
Influenced and molded by that deceptive designer
So skillful and crafty in guiding us away
Ever so masterfully allowing us our way
That we become accustomed to being in the darkness

What was once Holy is seen as folly
Truth is eroded, past rules are just old-fashioned
Being modern, everything is acceptable
What fun, join the crowd, we are free
Free to experience everything the world offers

But we have this small inner voice
Almost extinguished by that smiling deceiver
Something inside whispers during our quiet times
That our way is going against the grain
Some unexplainable sixth sense speaking softly
Fleeting thoughts of some other direction
A pull in our hearts that will not go away

Another way begins to enter our consciousness
A way that reveals our freedom is actually bondage
And that true freedom is found when we come to believe
In that One who comes to us where we are
All faults known, we are accepted and forgiven
By that One who has waited so long for us to come home

An unknown kind of love shown by our Heavenly Father
Who wants to be in a relationship with those so undeserving
The veil is lifted and our senses are refocused on His way
We are accepted as a child of God because of One on a cross
We then know true freedom enjoyed with Him for eternity


Details | Free verse | |

A single word

A single word, that’s all I said. A mean, hostile word that I spoke to you. Why all the crying? What’s the fuss about? Just how much damage can one word do? A single word, one word too many. An uncalled for attack you can’t have expected. I really am sorry, but I can’t take it back. I just hope your trust can be resurrected.


Details | Free verse | |

the red wolfs speech

she said "what have you to offer me?"
I answered with sincerity. 
"my queen, i am humble. i have not much to offer, as i have no money or kin to speak of.
but heed my words, queen, as i come for reasons even god would not understand.
i bring to you, my queen, only what you see.
i offer to you my heart. let the blood it flows sustain you.
i offer you my soul, and may its vitality teach you more than any teacher.
i give you my body, and may its warmth keep you through the night, 
so that you may never be alone, my queen, so long as i live.


Details | Free verse | |

The Rope of Hope

Ain't it strange...
That I attach to you...like a troublesome sore
Do you find it odd...
That I truly love you to the core

But it's true...I can get a little insane at times...when I'm in a certain phase
Sorry to say, but get used to my crazy, psychotic nature...or leave me to rot...
But it ain't no surprise that we all aren't normal and we all are peculiar in our own bizarre ways
Sorry to burst your bubble, but haha, yeah...I've been causing mischief and what not

You untied me from my utter demise...
And you drowned away my thoughts that spread lies
In my head...making it spin madly
Like a Mary-go-round...

But it's true...I can get a little insane at times...when I'm in a certain phase
Sorry to say, but get used to my crazy, psychotic nature...or leave me to spoil and rot....

Don't be afraid, baby
It's only in your mind...
Anxiety is brewing in your blood
And I can't seem to hold on to the rope of hope

But it ain't no surprise that we all aren't normal and we all are peculiar in our own bizarre ways
Sorry to burst your bubble, but haha, yeah...I've been causing trouble and what not

Time is ticking like a bomb about to blow up into smoke and flame
It alarms to say this, but how DARE you waste my valuable time
Time is ringing like a church bell chime...it's your time to say goodbye and it's my time to forget your name
It's alarming to hear broken records of memory replay in my head...it's almost crime

Thinking of you is wonderful and sublime

But it's true...I can get a little insane at times...when I'm in a certain phase
Sorry to say, but get used to my crazy, psychotic nature...or untie me from this tight knot

You made the decision to untie me from my utter demise...
And you drowned away my thoughts that spread lies
In my head...making it spin madly
Like a Mary-go-round...


Details | Free verse | |

Unforgotten

I've captured you from death's snare,
While others were unaware
No more worrying,
You are unforgotten

You are alive
Others deny it 
Well, I know...
You are unforgotten
In my memory
You are unforgotten 	


Details | Free verse | |

Death, it is a sad way to go

Death, it is a sad way to go,
to leave this earth, dressed in your Sunday best
While faces surround you with tears
breaking the barriers of their emotions
tearing their hearts apart, looking down
upon my stone face, upon the face, lays a simplistic smile
that shows no emotion, no teeth, no life.
Death, it is a sad way to go.

People hurry, say their goodbyes,
but when your alive,
they never come around, they never call, they never even think
of you and how you are feeling.
While you walk the streets, with a smile on your face,
nothing but knives stick sharpe in my back and gossip
burns a hole in my soul and heart;
but I keep on walking and smiling.
I keep rolling on through like a summer hurricane
tears apart a coastal city in the heat of June weather,
Walking till death comes to shake my hand and grin at my soul.

Then as you lay their in your casket
with a buqouet of your favorite flowers, (Roses and Tulips)
they sit around you, the same faces, the same blind eyes
and they all shed tears and says good things.
Too late for that don't you think?
Death, it is a sad way to go, but what relief you get,
when finally departing in peace and leaving the drama
and careless people in your life.
After I am put six feet under, a week of crying passes,
After two weeks I am lost and long forgotten,
nothing but a stone at my cranium to keep me company
and my new friends, who sleep along next to me.
Dead and forgotten, but the dead never forget their fellow lost souls.
Only the living forget such souls that were so good to them,
now they are gone,
I am gone.
How do you feel, now that I am gone?

Death, it is a sad way to go, but what peace you recieve in Paradise.


Details | Free verse | |

Unseen Fetters

Unseen fetters bind as chains,
Yoking man to his sin.
Sweat and pain is his legacy,
As were father's before.
From outrage, His cry echoes for justice,
Drowning out Mercy's faint whisper..
There is no hope,
Without realizing that forgiveness is the lock,
And God's grace is the key.




























Details | Free verse | |

To Err Is Human To Forgive Divine

"To err is human to forgive divine"

This lesson is priceless
for that, I thee love
a gift forgiveness 
from our Father above
without a trial or without bail
this small piece of salvation
he waits patently for us to reveal
a simple few words that set us free from heavy chains
"forgive me 'o father" seems to be trapped and ingrained 
but once the words flow in a glorious flood
the knowledge and wisdom spring forth in a budding new love 
no longer will the guilt seep in and invade
the torment will be lifted
and we shall live once again
 
It is then your gift of forgiveness shall truly reign 
even when others have caused excruciating pain
you will truly  grow to encourage others and forgive
a true gift from our creator
your heart shall be softened 
and a life of love will begin..........

"To err is human to forgive divine"



Amen...............

__________________
     CONTEST


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Let Down Left on

My first smile
A firerwork in the moon
To return and drown in the 
ocean.
As earth was moving
I stayed still
Searching for corners
To lay and to hold.
As stars or rain
My dreams were falling
Upon passengers heads,
Making wird noises on their red 
umbrellas.
Every belief gets sacrificed in 
the name of present,
While longing for the glory to 
attain.
I didn't know. 
As every colour may fade
Or fairytales hide disaster,
I was left into this storm alone
To bear the weight of 
forgiveness.


Details | Free verse | |

Believe It or Not

Believe it or not

He swore by the day he sighted the earth
This step he took 
Was not aimed at piercing anyone
But to show his appreciation
At exactly the time (or on time)

Had he known the blessed wouldn't be pleased
With this gesture
He would have 
Hands down
And waved for naught

'What are my mistakes'
He asked
Cos his heart is mixed

This mind is now full with mix feelings

The memory of strange letters that gloomed at his eyes

Believe it or not
He had never wish for anything

If nothing will make him live a simple life
And meet his Creator in good shape
Then he will be satisfied with that hope
Than a hope of something 
Where he wishes for nothing

A.O


Details | Free verse | |

Reprimand

Still, chimney birds emerge,
cobweb-coated, darkly blithe --
to skim the sky's inverted
bowls of purple porcelain
and to utter their gray-tinged
raucous cries at evening:
a reprimand...and sorrow...


Details | Free verse | |

FORGIVENESS


On my knees, humbly, Thee I implore,
My Lord,
To forgive me, your foolish servant  
For
Complaining for having not  
The things I desired:   
The color of eyes I wished for,
The gorgeous ears, 
The lovely nose
The fine-looking hands
The straight legs,
The stunning body,
Instead of 
Thanking Thee for what Thou to 
Me have given:
Eyes that your creation 
Can see,
Ears that Thy melodies enable 
Me enjoy,
A nose that nature’s aromas 
let me scent,
Hands that allow me to touch and 
To caress,
Legs that permit me to move about 
And 
Finally, a body swift and strong to 
Keep me healthy for such a very 
Long time.

Show Thy mercy, my Lord, I Thee beseech 
Cause
I have failed the worth of all Thy divine gifts, 
Sooner to realize!


© Demetrios Trifiatis
   28 AUGUST 2014 



Details | Free verse | |

Goodbye Dear Child

Goodbye Dear Child

We will see you again

We will love and pray for you

Each night until then

Please find it in your heart

To forgive your mothers

Blasphemous heart

Please forgive her

For believing in “Pro-Choice”

For taking away your voice

She knows not what she has done

In this decision no one has won

Words can’t begin to describe

All the pain she's in

Saying she's sorry

Won’t wipe away her sin

For her decision she surely pay's

She surely pay's each and every day

Goodbye for now dear child

We will see you again

We will Love and Pray for you 

Each day until then…

Lay


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Dad

Dear Dad 				
Why don’t you love me? 
The small brown eyed girl asked her father as he beat her at night,
 then with a smile in the morning he’d scoop her up in his arms to play.
Why don’t you love me? 
The bigger brown eyed girl asked her father as he walked out and
never came back.
Why don’t you love me? 
The young brown eyed girl asked her boyfriend of two years,
As he walked out the same door her father did eight years before.
Never to return.
Why didn’t you love me?
The older brown eyed girl asked her father at his funeral.
As she leaned over the edge of his casket and kissed him gently on the forehead,
Tears running down her cheeks.
Why couldn’t you love me? 
The oldest brown eyed girl asked as she lays Jasmine’s and roses
On her father’s grave.
Only a row down from her old boyfriend’s,
With love that never dies.
And her question is answered in the wind, 
As the answer is whispered in her heart.
How could you love me?
If you couldn’t love yourself?


Details | Free verse | |

Flat Canvas

Flat canvas;

Bubbling brown ridges strike 
The confining dimensions in a hostile yawn: 
Upwards, Outwards.

Walk the world no longer, an ending beckons, 
A precipice builds moments where swallows wager wings 
On new seed: New breeds.
Falling buys the assurance of seconds
From a sinking well. 
Oh well.

Remember us when the globe begins to slip,
Bang drums for our pity:
Our crescendos mean less than meaningless.
And then, when spheres crack, continue 
On the whorl of a thumb, 
Stretching hope to nothing.
Run.


Details | Free verse | |

By HIs Good Grace

You  bore the stripes of a sinner. 
Though the scares were not yours to wear.

With your blood you paid the debt
You knew we could not pay.

Thank You Heavenly Father
For I would not be here today.

By your Grace we have been saved
Rather lost or indenial.

You suffered the pain and torture.
When it should have been us on trial.


Details | Free verse | |

Tears of a Raven

She left the “unkindness”, descended upon  a mossy knoll
Over looking the darkness of the moonless, misty graveyard
The ebony clouds shielding the glistening tears of the Raven
Tears of LOVE for those that, waiting : Sing at the gates of Heaven
Tears of Sorrow for those, unbelievers, who will spend Eternity in Hell
Do not show me the face of despair, the tears of forever unknown : 
Her tears roll down the contours of  her cheeks  falling to the Ground
Creating the Zenith of  an Everlasting ROSE never to be seen
As Roses grow where Her tears splashed upon the wanting Earth
She spreads her wings and returns to the “Congress” from wince She came
Darker and Lighter than the rest of the “death  flock” soaring  ABOVE
 
Inspired by the Contest " Among the Dead "
Sponsored by ~ A Rambling Poet ~
Dedicated to the ones I LOVE ; " Recieved by the LORD "
 By HGarvey Daniel Esquire
             5th Place


Details | Free verse | |

A Cleansing Rain

Tensions end on troubled notes.
Tired and weary she takes to bed.
Cascading rain endlessly,
A steady drum, it drips it's beat,
Cleanses and lulls her to sleep.

Awakened from a deep slumber
By a tempestuous noise of thunder.
The sky lit up with white-blue light.
Witnessed through her open window,
A wicked electric display to amaze.
Raw beauty streaking the night sky.

Dream and reality intersects.
Lightening brilliant as a sword.
She knows that secrets dwell beneath.
Tears cry harder upon the earth.

After the downpour and rain passes on,
A breathable cleansing of sorts.
All is awash, the earth rich and fertile.
She now smells hope.


Connie Gildersleeve
My Previous Poem Title of 5 Minute Challenge, 'Too Short Of A Time'
For Russell Sieve's contest, 'Complete Your Poem'


Details | Free verse | |

I love you more

What can I render to the Lord for all His gifts to me
His love
His Grace 
His forgiveness
His sacrifice
His faithfulness
His Joy
He who took MY SINS
His abounding Mercy
His fathomless love
His total commitment to my salvation
To my wholeness
To my welfare
To my emotional stability
To giving me eternal life
He gave a pure white robe to cover me with HIS RIGHTEOUSNESS

Because of Jesus-I now know Him as an adoring Father. 
A Brother who will always walk so close I feel His presence and who always watches over me.
A mother whose words and affections surround me daily with care like a Mother hen
Proverbs:1:8

What can I render to the Lord who took my pain
Who in His own body was wounded and bore the sorrows and my grief I was to going through and the mistakes and the sin ready at every moment to try and trick me out through my life-time- 
He sent His WORD- His LIGHT to enlighten my darkness and show me clearly the road I should take-(Proverbs: chapters 1to 9)

Yes YOU were always ready to defend me, a helpless orphan- for without YOU as my Dad and as my mother- I was abandoned to this world-
But Now I can cry with all my heart- ABBA FATHER I love you - But YOU say
          
               I 
     LOVE  Y  MORE 
              O
              U 

What can I render to the LORD- MY God- whose precious pure blood was spilt to bear the sins of all our humanity- I will take ‘the cup’ of Your salvation and honor your name with my life- For only your pure blood is worthy to pay for all sin-I will confess your name before the world for which you died to save -and I will call upon your HOLY name - for your name alone is WORTHY- JESUS.

© Brenda V Northeast 28th  January 2012 


Details | Free verse | |

Dream, January 2008

We were in a car,
you and me
and her,
crunched uncomfortably together,
three people tied
by passionate
veins of aching blood.
And my knees curled at my chest
in the middle of the backseat,
your face
and hers
in profile against
the windshield.
It wasn’t raining
though
perhaps that would have been
more poignant.
She didn’t speak
to me,
only gave me backwards looks
as if to say…
oh, I don’t know what she’d say
if she could say anything to me:
in the dream,
she spoke only to you.
And there I am,
sweating in the backseat,
tears piercing the corners of my eyes,
and I can’t say
anything.


Details | Free verse | |

Paths We Choose unfinished WIP

Don't ever
Lose sight
Today is where
To believe in yourself

Up before our dawn
You perceive the gray
Not realizing for what I long
And You asked me not to stay

Our life, it seems, has come to an impasse
I choose to love you forever
Resetting our shiny compass
Wishing each other the best

To our own endeavors

rlm '11


Details | Free verse | |

Hunger Warning

     Hunger Warning 

Family and friends are first to go
Then the teeth and hair
Weight loss due to hunger
Is guaranteed
Begging for food is against the law
In most communities
Hunger is not a crime but should be
I’m looking for my other shoe
Something delectable to chew on
If you have it bring it back
I licked it in the morning
Who knows what you might contract
From someone as low as me
Return it please and let me starve in peace 


Details | Free verse | |

Three Days Hence

It's been seven years, I almost forgot-
not this day: but the distance we've climbed.
I couldn't remember my age, because it correlates
to years we've been apart.

I forgot to be apprehensive, this time it was sneaky.
It waited for the first happy holiday wishing
from some idiot to remind me.
   It was Good Friday. 
When God took your spirit home
and left me dying to know,
how to love him for his sacrifice
when he asked me to give up you?
How do I heal this death and rise with you in his arms?

I blasphemy, I know, but you loved him more
in sight of you that graceful place grows
pale in and foreign in mine eye.

Alas, I fail the test, I could not be as strong as you.

We knew it would not wait, but the parting was still to fast.
I sat in thought three days before your sleep and asked,
"In three days time my savior died, I wonder hence
what of my soul will rise with his?"

And sitting easter morning, 
  holding some idiots well wished basket,
I realised Three days passed.
  He took you home and left me lost on Friday morn,
I wailed my loss through Saturdays more,
         and Easter morning I felt your last hug, your kiss good bye.

I cursed my self for asking, if my soul would rise with his,
    because you, my love, are my soul and all ready there
there fore I am not strong enough to give this pain up 
       to honor his sacrifice and transcend, I sit still lost and wonder:

I believe and I love, but I don't know how to rise
I don't now how to live again. 
Faith crushed I don't think I can trust.
I am the shell of your grace trying once more 
to live in the love that failed me, as I failed the gift of his sacrifice.


Details | Free verse | |

Water

The water. 
It ripples and waves.
Its soothing to the touch and it runs over your body like an invisible blanket.
When life is too much to take I run to the water.
I've thought about lost loved ones over the view of the ocean.
As the waves ran over my toes and pulled back it was as if God was telling me I'm here.
I see your pain. I see your passion. In time I will wash them away.
When it rains, it stirs something inside of my heart. I know that as this storm shall pass, so will the trials of life.
The pain will be washed away. All will grow new again.
Pain is water.
Joy is water.
Life it water.
Water is beauty.


Details | Free verse | |

Dear God

Dear God,
I ask for forgiveness before going to bed
I pray for some peace, please replace this heartache instead
I pray for my Mom and me to get along
I pray for my son to be happy and strong

Dear Holly,

You asked and are forgiven
You have been given peace for your heartache that stretches the day
You will find strength in your mother for that is her way
You will see your son amidst friends with me watching at bay

Dear God

I ask for forgiveness before going to bed
Thank you for my peace it feels good this way
Thank you for my mom she will not lead me astray
Thank you for my son, I know with your guidance he is going to be okay

And, tell Jesus thank you for dying for my sins
I know when I get to Heaven; I will see family and friends.

© 4/13/2013 Holly P. Moore


Details | Free verse | |

The World We Live In

My heart aches for a world filled with peace, so much sadness and destruction,
I cannot take any more.
I get up in the morning and put a smile on my face,
I watch things on the news and I feel disgrace.
How can I smile when the grimness of life for others hurts me so much?
How can I eat my food and not feel guilty for the starving millions?
How can I waste water having a bath or a shower when others have no
clean water even to drink?
Dying of malnourishment and dying because of contaminated water,
All over the world this is happening to real human beings and what do I do?
Carry on as normal and put a smile on my face.
The children are crying, their parents are dying,
The Parents are crying, their children are dying,
But the world carries on as normal,
And I get up every morning and put a smile on my face.
Wars are raging everywhere, haunted faces staring “Why doesn't anyone care?”
Fear and terror is their living nightmare “Why doesn't anyone care?”
We care, but we choose to look away, “we're not affected” people say,
So we get up every morning, put a smile on our faces and get on with our day.


Details | Free verse | |

this time

he came of
his own volition

this time

he was rested
and i saw a
glimmer of
his old humor

in his eyes

a little put off
i played to his
mood and
the evening
went well

and you know

i felt relieved
some what comfortable

somehow

i guess i am
forgiving after
all

this time

you know, don't you
i am just that way
you know

how could i 
be hating someone
long after i forgot
to remembered
what the hate was
about

so i forgave again

this time


Details | Free verse | |

Rave the Day

I went another damn day
Say what you say again now
Then go away
Sift through what’s left of us
Compile a short note for me
Find yourself the good one tonight
When I’m back you might know
Wound up in your cold again
Knowing when to breathe helps
Your language still contends
Body always wins with me in the know
Share your spitting thoughts in me
Parade my sickness like it’s your own
The carnage always looks grim
Colors are always stagnant here
Brilliant way to win, losing
Sadness will always shine for me
Who? What did he even mean
Too kind some would say
Differ the rest, go easy on this
Sit down for the end please
I’ve found the only good I’ll ever have
I went another damn day.


Details | Free verse | |

Five Letter Word

The chill outside the window swept the oatmeal room
where he took his comfort; a secondary womb
on days the sun refused to part the gloom
of ordinary lies.

The question wandered, clumsy, stumbling in his mind,
where the past took liberty, refusing to unwind.
Festered now, the fetid lines 
of ordinary lies.

~~~

Dying interrupted. A sound body
refusing to decay sufficiently
to enter the crypt.

Nothing matters, the daily crossword becomes
an endless solving. What is
a five letter word for

salvation? Preached as though it was believed,
available to all, free of charge, 
he would say to those

with ears, listening or not; but the specter 
of his heinous crime shattered
his chosen truth.

~~~  

Where in the dance does the music stop
for wounded children forever cursed
by the sins of a father?

Seventy times seven the prayer passed lips
quivering.  The godless sky with no light.
No stay of self execution.

~~~

On sunny days the old man still laughed,
less now though, and slurred.
The line of doubt

fastened by his clenched jaw
unwilling to surrender
to life, or death.

~~~

The bicycle pedals in rhythm the tune of
words falling on forever paper.
Blessed release.

The song of redemption. The older and the younger
suffer together, miles apart and wait
for a five letter word.
 



Details | Free verse | |

Her Final Words

"No." She whispered before drowning into her sorrows.
Her life had been a simple happy one. 
There were no pains and no troubles.
Life was life and people were people.
Life was simple.
and life was all about tomorrows.
Life didn't know about sorrows.
Her sorrows.
Those same sorrows that she drowned in never existed. 
They were never there, but where?
First to be sad in the naive town of joy.
Sorrow became contagious and what was known as happiness no longer was there.
It was non-exististent. 
A meager thought 
and a blessed memory.
She tried and tried.
She failed and failed.
Life was no longer hers.
For Pain was her only possession.
Her curse.
She lived and she died.
Yet, her legacy was passed on.
Never was it gone.
"No." She whispered before drowning in her sorrows, 
"Save them."


Details | Free verse | |

Survival Of The Fittest

Dropped out of school
At an early age
Lived on the streets 
Because, I disgusted my mother
She thought I was a poor example
Of true Christian beliefs
At an early age 
She religiously drummed into me
‘blood is thicker than water’
And yet, 
Here I am today confused, lonely and hungry
No one protecting me
No friends
No family
No home to go too
Just, peoples eye for an eye,
tooth for a tooth mentality
Praying for the sun to shine
To feel some warmth again!
Sun rays of hope, lighting me up
To live through this darkness without fear
With a heart full of faith
No matter what happens to me, now!
If only I could drink my salty tears
It would sustain me for a lifetime
Your tears are worth nothing, around here
You’re classed as weak and venerable
Only attracting death
Your life worth nothing!
Save me from myself
I am my best friend
I am my worst enemy
My prayers and dreams
Lost in the wind
Blowing around like autumn leaves
The rain washing them away
Down the drain into the sewage
Rolling with the seasons
Year after year
Survival for the fittest!
Surviving on the love
Hidden, inside me
Being my strength and guide
My personal lifeline
In surviving this crazy world 
We all live in


Details | Free verse | |

The Simple Truth

All Mighty One
The Beginning and the End
Alfa and Omega

Thy living water spills free in a fountain of forgiveness 
love and light so pure and free
my cornerstone of strength and hope
for you, I fall to my knees

The darling of heaven once crucified 
you have risen in all glory and now you rest within my desperate soul
a predestined beauty of the eternal promise of everlasting life
I call to you in good times of prosperity 
and I ask that you might sustain this life
I cry out to you in times of trial
knowing you will guide and strengthen this weary soul

My precious Jesus, son of God almighty 
I surrender to thee
I praise only you
forge and mold me oh' sweet Father
for I believe
yes
I believe



Details | Free verse | |

to one who was never born

to one who was never born 


I cannot fit you amongst dead sisters; 
put you to sleep with humming lullaby.

I cannot, for you 
have never been born.

Mapping a womb sometimes reveals you, 
coiling, illusory and innocent.

Just any womb 
carrying a girl.

You seem iridescent midst mother’s warmth; 
it means nothing to you, if you may

never be born as
my little sister

whom I have not put to sleep with a song.


© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar


Details | Free verse | |

A Consciousness Of Self-Confidence

Death silently creeps in as the rule of no exception he takes up a collection of lost souls with no more time the one priceless possession Void of whats right is the existance I've come to know everything surrounding turns to shame hidden in sorrow yet I still live for tomarrow to realize these mending dreams take a look inside me not a man who's self decieved My diary is none of me that I paint easily unveiling made up of painful poetic verses that show I let go of hateful feelings for I am steadily rising no longer seems like a chore every day I wake up leaves me wanting less much more The only thing that ever stopped me was the nightmare I came to be even through the worst circumstances they left me with a certain understanding Death now watches over me I'm careful to nod my head for without his protection many times now I would lay lifeless without a voice that guides me no master do I call Lord every ounce of belief in me other faith is too much to afford as my dreams become reality you can only watch in wonder while I perform my miracles not atop the mountain, but under.


Details | Free verse | |

The Force

Adding
peculiar
subtracting
never

laws 
of something
(besides physics)

has to
wants to
needs to
improve

velocity 
is present
and that very force
pushes 
the dead weight
forward
until
it can't sit still anymore

because
it has to

it's got to move
or else
it dies


Details | Free verse | |

How could i ever forgive you

How could i ever forget the pain 
i felt for what you did
A tear drop falling from my eye
then finally Hitting my chest like
pistols  

I wish i could forgive you
But ''i'm sorry'' seems so plain
Breaking free of all the lies
And betrayal seemed futile
Because love has trapped me 
with you
Like quicksand slowly sucking me
As i uselessly try to escape

Its too late for the meaningless
apologies
Said at the fear of losing me,
Taking euphemisms to the next
level.

How could i ever forgive you
You ripped my soul
I could never forgive you.


Details | Free verse | |

real

~So finally I am good with goodbye~

:) 

(the next time he comes to mind)

:(     :(
     :(

As goodbyes are forever......................

Sad


Details | Free verse | |

The Hardest Thing

Last night we had a quarrel
We went to bed so mad
Each had to get up early
The morning was quite sad
I never meant to say that
I know you didn’t, too
With hopes to reconcile
Just know that I love you

Yeah darling…
It couldn’t be more true

That’s why 
Leaving you
Is the hardest thing to do

Each morning when we go to work
A piece of me, it goes with you
I cannot wait to get back home
To do those things we do

That’s why 
Leaving you
Is the hardest thing to do

I hope tonight we’re civil
We listen and we learn
Together, we’ll get past this
Each others trust, we’ll earn
So, then we can retire
To the bedroom that we share
Lie within each others arms
And show how much we care

Yeah darling…
It couldn’t be more true

That’s why 
Leaving you
Is the hardest thing to do

Each morning when we go to work
A piece of me, it goes with you
I cannot wait to get back home
To do those things we do

That’s why 
Leaving you
Is the hardest thing to do

And when my work’s over
I will come back to you


Details | Free verse | |

OF a Tree, Thee, and an Angel's Fee

Force feed me the taste of your skin

‘You will have to break my chastity belt wide open now
for I have sold myself into silent slavery to this ….our universal broken heart

even you will have to try hard……to save me now

I cannot recall your sounds…your hand motions 
as they devoured the subtle softness of me 
drew round my curvaceous places in curling ownership
intimacies’ sweetest embrace 

But too…you move to me 
with a ferocity that mowed the grass down  to a short golf course length 
from the living room table where you drew it happening… a hundred years ago

The length of your hair too has been a subject of much debate 
Love
that surging heavenly song...that told our story so well
 
like that movie from long ago about the girl who cut off and sold her hair to buy her love a golden watch fob and chain …the one who sold his golden watch to buy her a beautiful clip pin for her gorgeous long hair 
………………………………..you see how this goes …with true love

We cut off our noses and then turn backs on our faces 
and on each other on Facebook 

Itself the enemy…where only devils and the luckiest of angels spread


Tread on me beloved!
till I am awakened 
to our lips 
 which just now in writing I suddenly can feel meeting again

taste 
smell 
the salted brine of your pure water and sometimes beer soaked self

Is it me you feared 
as you said Good bye?

How little you know me 

like the formation of the first ever green tree grows up one limb at a time 
from a base long song of deep roots and strong center...so beautiful the Hosts stagger before its creation ….Halleluiah
The limbs sprouting forth like the wings bursting out of the flesh of the first angel 
who died in agony as they were formed….exploding from his shoulders
moving her hair aside as the arch of wing thrust like white tree limb from the goodness within
and the reincarnation of true kindness was born to the conscious of itself

so my love knows no limit 
my soul no separation
and my being no longing


Details | Free verse | |

Today Time Stood Still

Today time stood still, I could see existence in its clearest form. A vibe of coldness and silence, yet peaceful and reassuring, you could almost imagine it to be the same feeling of initial death. 

The curse of knowledge and intelligence is you know too much. Sometimes that ignorant bliss seems attractive, but even if given the choice I would not go back, as the more I learned the more i seeked. 

I pray for humanity and the will of the people, the story draws close to the end and with hope I watch . . . in the end good will always prevail, Amen


Details | Free verse | |

North Star

Let your fate take root
On hard rock, tangle and bury
Before the coming storm.

and before the coming of the storm
amidst a garden of your crafting
Beliefs and memories planted
and like seeds watered
Take root amidst your cherished greens
Take hand in hand your
memoir 
and brace with rooted tangled feat
-mangled,
The coming storm
Come to wash away
come to whisk away;

This is a magical storm
something fantastical
	like myth was born
from your hands, as you shake them left to right
and wrestle from them
 seeds
trample on your well-trodden soil
and in waves bead your sweaty water
shelter little sprouting
take shelter in his shadow,

Did you nurture your garden?
like I have nurtured mine
	mine, lush with little ideas
lush with my graceful evasion
of duties unwatered
moments hoarded
lush with little trees, that in my shadow
do not grow,
and their little fruits, so sour born
Yours, that garden, a gnarled tree
posies tangled on mangled fields
bounties of fruit, in your mangroves
	children of our labor
all alike stand before the storm,
	
	Dark clouds gather, broil forth like no afterthought
an army summoned to war, the tax collector come for dues
and bubbling forth
Comes lightning and thunder like sickle and torch
Come to reap the song and sun:

and it is in this shadow they finally grow
and gnarled hand takes my own
	-I will not rot away on my own
I stand before my fated choices
and together
our bonds new, old and gnarled
stand firm these moment’s beliefs and
	creations
children and parent, arms locked, heads on shoulders both
eyes cast out and tears exhumed
before the coming storm

Our legs take root in our
garden soil
and we cling to what
we know
we hold to what knows
us
but the storm is just
so grand
and our roots are just
so shallow.




Details | Free verse | |

If Yesterday

If yesterday was two years ago
Then I've been loving you since yesterday
Still thinking of you since yesterday
Every minute a reminder of you
Overwhelmingly beautiful
Your smile and your eyes, you smize at me
A gorgeous gentleman, a lucky strike
It was slicing a thin sliver of ice
It was delicate, but it was
For the shortest moment, beautiful
The same way I had you, momentary
But I can't ever deny the fact
That you have been, yes you are
One of the most beautiful people
I have ever set my eyes on
That I've ever given my heart to
All the things I could have shown you
The things I have made you realize
All the other words I could have written
To describe you and you only
Oh, if only yesterday was two years ago
Then, you were mine only yesterday


Details | Free verse | |

Tear in My Heart

My mother never knew what to do with me.
I was an obligation that needed to be. 
But I wanted her to love me.
Simply… love… me.
I would do anything to please her.
Wanting her to be proud, I worked hard at everything I did.
But she viewed me as her competition, not wanting to be out done.
Needless to say our relationship wasn’t what I wanted it to be.
I dreamed to have a family of my own to simply… love… me. 
I had a daughter who didn’t live. 
And my mom said someone like me shouldn’t have kids.
Though she didn’t know about my epilepsy and other problems with my health.
Then my life fell apart with hard times everywhere.
I didn’t show it but hidden…my health wasn’t all that good.
My husband’s diabetes affected his mind. And epilepsy was working on mine.
I ignored that fact. I worked hard as my epilepsy kept tearing every thing apart.
Finally with a hard earned job… Fourteen years later I had a son. 
The son I’d always wanted to have.
I was so very proud but was attacked by both health and son, at every turn.
He was wilder than most creating problems everywhere.
He blamed me for everything and everywhere something went wrong.
My health did it again at work as my relationship continued to crumble with my son.
He hated a mother who had to work, had epilepsy, and just wasn’t there for him. 
I was slowly dying when he was 12 and I was 52, when finally I was saved.
That night… I met God and he said I had more to be done along the way.
I came back and did every thing I could to help my wayward and unruly son.
But way before I helped him go to college… I knew I had lost my son.
But his best friend needed a mom so I was there for him.
It seems so strange to tell, but as my son moved out… His best friend simply moved in.
And it’s even stranger to tell that… 
The son who will occasionally smile at me, is someone else’s son.
He’s my heart-adopted son and has brought my first son closer again.
Jesus was always here and… the tear in my heart is gone.


Details | Free verse | |

From the Fiery Pits of Hell to My Glorious Home in Heaven

It started when I was young.
I chose to take a walk on the wild side.
I drove my parents insane with my deeds.
I pushed everything good away.
I was bad, evil to the core.
Lying, stealing and cheating were all I knew.
Then the drugs and sex overtook me.
Riding on the slippery slope to Hell.
Satan had my heart, mind, body and soul.
He wouldn’t let me go.
I didn’t want him to.
I wanted my life of misery.
It was good to me.
I fell hard into his snare.
I really felt that was where I belonged.
It was a place to call home.
All my friends egged me on.
As I played games with the Devil.
I drew closer and closer to him.
Through Tarot and the Occult. 
Witchcraft, casting spells.
It was so intense.
I never wanted my ride to end.
I was on top of the world.
Living in the fiery pits of Hell.

He reached down to where I was.
He took my hand and pulled me out of the muck.
He saved me.
Showed me a new way of life.
No more lying, stealing or cheating.
The need for drugs was gone.
I was taught how sex could be beautiful and pure.
I was free of Satan’s grasp.
He no longer had control over me.
My heart, mind, body and soul now belong to another.
He loves me.
In spite of the terrible things I’ve done, he really loves me.
He’s forgiven me.
Can you believe that?
Sent His Son to die for ME!
It was on a cross on a hill far away.
The Father couldn’t even watch as His Son paid the price for me.
All for Me!
Now my sins are all forgiven.
The Devil’s hold on me broken.
I am free!
Free to have faith, to hope and to love.
The best news of all is that the Son is coming back for me!
Right now, this very second, He’s working on my place.
My glorious home in Heaven!



Details | Free verse | |

Lost

Lost feeling all this oppression, I know the Devils right behind me... I can feel him breathing down my neck. Running away from sin following God's voice keep him in my heart turning depression to rejoice.  I feel I'm losing control so i get down on my knees and pray for my soul, I still dont know all the things i have to do or where i gotta go counting on Christ to lead me. he will always guide me, instead of running and hiding i'll stand firm right beside him. I got alot to say with God speaking thru me, im an example and im glad he chose me. He lived and died on a tree arose three days later and in heaven hes residing, abiding listening to his will sanding on his path and thats where im gonna chill, Let me be real take a second to explain how im feeling and not dealing with the devils games he tries playing. I left him behind cuz i ran him over just the other day yea i like it that way.

When im Lost feeling all this depression, I know Jesus will lead me in the right direction... Count on him the bible gives you the instructions, he will take your fear away he aint playing now.. 

When im Lost feeling all this depression, I know Jesus will lead me in the right direction... Count on him the bible gives you the instructions, he will take your fear away he aint playing now.. 

I have a God who sent his son and took the stripes, he Paid the price for my life, a price he didnt have to pay but he loved us so much he couldnt let us die... Jesus you took the weighgt and you put it on yourself, theres no greater love then to lay down your life for your friends. and you did it for me even though im undeserving and I wanna thank you so much. Everytime I fall you open my eyes and show me where I went wrong, you have forgiven me and I have another chance to teach the things you taght me. Lord I am your vessel please use me to your will help me to do the things for which im called let me hear you voice through the Holy Spirit Lord, reach down and touch me.

When im Lost feeling all this depression, I know Jesus will lead me in the right direction... Count on him the bible gives you the instructions, he will take your fear away he aint playing now.. 

When im Lost feeling all this depression, I know Jesus will lead me in the right direction... Count on him the bible gives you the instructions, he will take your fear away he aint playing now..


Details | Free verse | |

Collaborating In the Clouds

There is a place I am walking up a ladder
I see clouds everywhere
I see up the ladder a figure standing 
Guidiing me to the light
I am at the top and the lights are so bright
Never hurting my eyes
The Lord watches and guides me with holding out His hand
I ask the Lord what did I do to deserve so
Much of your love and to be in this wonderful place
The Lord replied with great kindness and said child
you gave me the best gift a person could give
Your undying love, prayers and good things you did for others
You see child He said to me the kind deeds you did for 
my poor, defenseless children on earth you gave them
food, water and shelter where you could and you in fact
were helping me.
But most of all Child you gave me your heart and soul and tried the
best you could for all those in need. Prayers were done not for recognition but for my glory
Now rest here child with me for all eternity


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Truth Continued

They promised fountains
Flowing crystal streams
Cool refreshing waters
I want to drink till I am full
Why else would I journey to this desolate place
I walk over the bones of those who came before me
Their voices scream out from the dust
warning me to go back
Am I already too late
I retrace my steps until I dissapear
Surrrender
Leave behind the evaporated me
The next moment I am lifted
carried on invisible wings
Light as air
Have I been turned to dust
I look into my Savior's eyes
His tears become a stream
The banks overflow
I am refreshed
I drink till I am full
reconstituted
His promise has been kept
I am saved because he wept
With his body he paid my debt
Now his truth is the one I accept


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Checkered

I tried to regain whatever
it is that remained from
the shattered glasses
that broke the stillness
of that night.

I tried to smile again
and forget about everything
that makes this heart go into a 
place
where butterflies flutter in the 
breeze.

I tried to forget about
that day when the rain didn't 
stop falling
just when you decided not to 
come.

Time will pass.
The white statues by the park
will crumble but not
the memories of the walks we 
have spent there.

Time will pass.
I wish our memories would too.


Details | Free verse | |

false imprisonment for contest


She looked at his face as he raped her
Making sure she remembered all
When it was time to go to court
She watched as the jail sentence fell

He cried in court, I am innocent
No way would I do such a crime
But the court didn’t believe him
Put him away for a long time

Seems memories are a bad thing
In times when  you’r  not well
This man was innocent of the crime
Wasn’t him at all.

Mistakes are made quite innocently
Luckily he has forgiven her
For spending 11 years behind bars
When he knew that he shouldn’t be there

Said, one day I knew I would be rescued
From this life of pain
Knowing that you are innocent
Can drive a man insane.

“Live, forgive and keep moving on” are Ronalds motto
Not an easy task
When your back is against the wall
Justice is all you ask.

Now they speak out together
Public speaking about rape and distress
And the error of the eyewitness
When the victim’s life is a mess


Ronald Cotton  received  a life sentence which was revoked upon  DNA evidence, 11 years later.


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Your Love Is The Strongest

Send me to the darkest places;
That's where I feel You strongest.
A kiss and hug down the deepest alleys;
Never letting go, Your love is the strongest.


Details | Free verse | |

it ends with a question

i am not a bird whose black, for i am a blackbird
with my lumpy back turned away from her
the dying moon shadowing pale blue waters
made this blackbird teary 
where as a bird who was black-they'd be dreary
but i felt the dying moon hover over my galaxy
i soared closer, for a pinch more
i am the last blackbird facing this mountain
in awe that her final thouqht towards me
were beautiful
she freed the sun for the sake
of the butterflies flyinq inside me?


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Done For Good

Her look that day,
Should have told me everything she could not say.
Unprepared, I stared.
She walked away.
As she tossed our ring,
I felt the sting.

If I’d known then
How I feel today,
I'd heal the abscess and my heart’s decay,
Before her affection left me there that day.

JS Lambert


Details | Free verse | |

Reflection's of the soul.

The world is my mirror, it reflects
a man not yet made, so much
pain and suffering reside, it will not
change till I change inside, acknowledge
what I am, an inflated ego, in denial
of my true self, my sentient being
suffocated by lies, this is the reflection
I see, this is what is inside of me,
and little by little the ego crumbles
away and is buried by all of its
crutches unfulfilled, the reflection changes
with not one soul killed.


Details | Free verse | |

Shoved to shake me

So stellar you stood nearing immortality 
Shoved me away today, I'm only a calamity 

Strengthen the brain before and again
Take the comfort level down to a chagrin

Dwindle my emotions on love today
To be stoned away from you is my pay

Where you are is mine only to wonder
Would you even mind if I were to ponder

I'm so bent up, straighten me out now
It hurts to be only this for you now

Take it all away in all your ways
I'll be here apparently for a few more days

I can give you anguished attention
This you will ignore during our loving detention

So stellar you stood nearing immortality
Shoved me away today, I'm only a calamity  


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The Friar

  The friar
                                  Revered innocence

You’ve got to try it
put it on your lap
a smiling little thing
still sheer and brittle
if possible blind or deaf,
almost genderless.
It just sits there
an unweaned lamb.

Take the little head
gentle it downwards
to the issue of our charity
Lead it, shovel if necessary.
Don’t be scared!

Today it’s allowed
your parents too far:
the force of every belief
too big to grasp.
Sooner or later it pushes
to where we assumed
our hands were in power.



Details | Free verse | |

Deaf eyes, blind ears.

Oh ill fated lamb,
How we cling to your image,
We all love innocence irresponsibly,
Hold the ignorant upon the celebrity pedestal,
Till too late we find the lamb horned.

The blackness has seeped into homes,
Taught that the light is what blinds,
Feeling sorry for the dead, while life is taken away,
Energy vampirism is rampant, tugging on every chord.

Most will not know the truth while here,
The truth, the blindingly obvious they fear,
Always falling on deaf ears, no one will hear,
I’ve come face to face with a cliff...its sheer.


Details | Free verse | |

Silent Thought

My head splintered with silent thought

As I pondered over the crimson memories of you

Lifeless you lay

Like a boathouse wooden

Still as a frame

No longer in view

 

Lay


Details | Free verse | |

God Saw My Distress and Healed Me part 4

This question drives me up and down the walls
I know for certain that God has answered my calls
I can’t hang up on Him…He’s so brilliant
And I’m so little compared to Him…
Maybe I’m little in size and very insignificant compared to the most High
He gives me quite a natural high
He brings me back home and kisses me good night
Without His love, I’d be lost like a sheep losing his shepherd
I feel like I’m separated to God
As if God and I are on both sides of the coin…
Our oceans don’t collide with each other,
But He does make huge tidal waves…
And I make baby waves that swerve up and down
Like a wave’s movement, my life seems to have its low points and high points
But, when I build enough energy, I glide higher than the clouds
Though, unfortunately, I’ve only been dreaming this
Then, I collapse into the sand...my face rubs against it and I have scrapes all over
Sand and water do mix well, but afterwards, the sea shore’s weight will pile up on the bottom of the ocean floor
I can’t imagine how many grains of sand there are on Earth
There are countless amounts of ants on Earth as well
Trillions and trillions of them are in existence
It’s amazing how plants take in Carbon Dioxide
And we breathe in oxygen…
God is a fantastic creator and He did carve His creations pretty well
God saw my distress and He healed me
When I think about Him, I’m speechless and can’t say much
He’s made out of love and He bubbles me up with excitement
I haven’t given Him the credit of working miracles in my life…
But, I don’t want to divorce God…I must propose to Him like a wife
Does to her husband…I want to submit to Him
He made the sunset, the moon and stars
Look! He even made the planets and He healed our scars
He made the flowers, the roses and the creeping bugs
Look! He even made leaves for our eyes to see…
He made the change of seasons
God saw my distress and healed me
God made the wild cats, bears, reptiles
He made us have a brain that is as neat as black and white tiles
God healed me…and I’m simply glad He did so
God wiped out my distress…and He simply dressed me with happiness and He’s in high spirits to see me grow

 ~ Inspired by the band of Evanescence’s song: Never Go Back 
~ God inspired me to write this poem…


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A Mistake That Killed

In a race
There I ride 
I took a turn 
And cost a life
With a gash in my head
I ran to the other car
Inside were two men
One I recognized
I pressed my face on the shattered glass
And found my father, whose life just passed
A rush of guilt
Killed my mind
But not as much
As I ended my father's life.


Details | Free verse | |

REGRET

REGRET

Angry words spoken
In a heated moment
Cut like ice
Chilling the bone 
And scarring the soul
Can’t take them back
Or erase the sting

Can you receive
Softly spoken words 
Of repentance?
To trust again
Is not easy

Decisions made in haste
Lived out with regret
Joy is abandoned
Only despair
Covers the soul
And obscures our dreams
With hopelessness
Suppressed longings 
Lie hidden under 
Layers of self-contempt

Can you receive
A divine solution 
To free the soul
Of its’ delusion?
To believe again
Is not so easy

Beauty for ashes
If we can receive

mja


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The ones who love me

My entire life,
I have gone through the list.
The only ones that love me, still
have been the ones that have hurt me,
and i forgive, and forgive.
A bottomless pitt of giving.

Will i always have to pay a price?
Another heart wound, another theft
another lie, another hurt.

To trust, and give freely, is stupid
it costs me everything. 
I am no christian,
to let them crucify me, self sacrificial.

And they say, I need boundaries
and self love, to care for myself first,
to have anything to give.

The boundaries make me angry,
unforgiving, my heart closes
my inspiration dies, my soul is quiet
and doesnt speak to me

I am even more alone....


Details | Free verse | |

It's Simple

It's simple.
We make it much more complicated than it is;
Just live.


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness

I don’t need to forgive 
Or feel your forgiveness in return;
I don’t need to love you or feel 
The embers of your fire to get burned. 
Forgiveness, I’ve found
Is highly overrated 
Ever since you knocked me down 
My mind’s been saturated
With all the ugliness and hate your
Pathetic life engendered;
Forgiveness to or from you 
Will never be surrendered.  
So forgive me for not forgiving
The history of our past: I could deeply care
Less about who or what you are 
Than trench bugs in the grass.  Still,
I’ll let you pass
Like the untouchable, intangible wind, 
More miniscule than dirt and sand
I’ll tread on once again, my dear old once begotten 
Now long forgotten, friend.  
Hello-goodbye, excuse me 
But just who did you say you are?
Don’t make me blink my eyes again
And wish upon a star…
Because you’re as gone as any comet,
Gravitationally black hole bound;
So forgive me for not forgiving you
Without a whisper of a memory or a sound.  
But forgiveness is a word you don’t deserve 
When all you do is drag me down.        


Details | Free verse | |

My Quiet Place

In my quiet place
it's just you and me.
In this darkened room,
only you can see.
My heart is on the floor
for you to truly know
all the things I have done,
that have taken over me.
I turn my eyes away,
I feel the deepening shame,
but I feel you deep in my soul,
and know it's all ok.
You remind it's all passed,
no longer who I am.
You tell me it's not what I do now,
and hold me in your hands.
It's in this quiet place,
I just sit with you.
Crying through it,
because you have seen all I do.
I pray that you save me
from this life that I knew,
that you take this mind
make it whole too,
rid me of these things 
that I used to do.
In this quiet place
it is you holding me,
the darkness surrounds,
and you are covering.


Details | Free verse | |

My Prayer

Dear kind and loving Heavenly Father. Humbly I bow my head before you and thank you for all the love and mercies you have shown me. Thank you for giving me a roof over my head and groceries in my cupboards. Thank you for those you have given me. All my family and friends and also those who take care of my soul by feeding it every Sunday and pray for me every day, especially when I am week and sick. I feel your love through them and the powers of their prayers. I know I am not always worthy of your grace but because your son gave his life I rejoice that I have the chance to try and be a better person. Over and over you have forgiven me and I pray you help make me worthy. Help those who are week and lost, let them know and feel your love for nothing can give us more strength and peace then when we are under your wings. Hear the cries from those who are suffering. Please be gracious to them and end their suffering. Father I can never thank you enough for you answering my prayers in the last while. The doctors are amazed how well I have bounced back and I know it's from so many prayers from so many. I will never doubt again the power of prayer and thank you for letting me experience such joy. I pray all this in Jesus name Amen.

09.05.2014
Brenda Meier-Hans 
4th


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Your eyes, your life, your dreams

Your eyes, your life, your dreams..


In my eyes,  the future is a dream
that may come to realization in our present, 
or simply never exist.. 

Always try to live your life day by day 
with whatever you feel, live, see, and love. 
It takes one second for all you have lived to disappear.. 
and your memories to be erased!

Your brain is the key to your feelings, 
And what you have lived and built is part of your life. 
You life is the true proof of happiness
To what you have lived and built. 

Always try to appreciate what you have for the day; 
As whatever else you have, and whatever is left, 
it will be just memories and dreams. 
Memories and dreams from a future you may hold  tomorrow...
                                                                                   ... in memories of yesterday!

Dedicated to A.M.S.


Details | Free verse | |

8:15 To Freedom

Do you hear the train a'whistlin'?
I wonder where she's a'goin'.
Can she be boundin' toward freedom?
Well, there's freedom in Jesus!
And that's all we need!


Details | Free verse | |

A Peek Behind the Fence


Ignorance is a crime caused by putting up fences if we'd let go of the voices inside our heads and eliminate fears discussions would arise peel the blind folds from our eyes share real stories told without disguise encouraging progress could be made with concerns of what we've learned rather than what we are paid a fulfilling life is people based sharing giving looking out for others one human at a time despite our differences the truly rich way of living


Details | Free verse | |

A trauma that won't go away

I still  think the world of you,
 Just so you know.
Spaces between my fingers, 
 Where yours used to go.
Your arms that held my waist,
 Are replaced with aching pains.
I put myself in my cocoon,
 So time will heal my open wounds.
But the scars still remain,
 A trauma that won't go away.
Since we've been apart,
 I've been writing only the words of a broken heart. 


Details | Free verse | |

you coward

                   

                    Coward you
                    scared of who

Coward you
live in there

                     Coward you 
                      type away

Coward you 
burn yourself

                      Coward you
                      might as well

Coward you
burn in hell


Details | Free verse | |

finding the way back

the blue jays waited 
on the camp bench this afternoon
for you to feed them,

you ignoring me
cost them too,
they wept all day through.

we came to Yosemite 
for you
to find resolution
was it in an alleyway 
	or the Blue Onyx Bar?
did the sun, while feasting 
	on your skin
devour the last of us as well?

this moveable target
blazing the whiskey sky,
seduced my loneliness
following me 
	to Jack London Square

taunting me of you
	As well…

my hair is singed 
	from lying in your sun
i am tired of lying next to you
engineering the corpses tan,
i am far better 
	a pale man

this world of your unknown
strangers smile
approving glance
a night remembered twice to come,
sending you to the other side of the bed;
	whatever keeps you there

time finding ways to expand
diluting my reflection
make me more
leaving with less
fortifying with a smile
this journey back 
is longer than 
	the forward run


Details | Free verse | |

The Bird that is Loved and Loathed

It burns and it stings.
It hurts.
More than drowning beneath 
the ice.
More than remaining in a 
kindled flame
She hits and I no longer cry.
Why mother, why? 

It burned and it stung.
The markings remained, 
returned, and were relived
Looking, loving, and little 
known loathing were the known 
ways of living.
Never was their pity for the 
child that cried
Never was their relief for the 
child that tried

You were that lovely bird that 
understood the complications of 
felicity 
Nothing looked the same in 
those dewy browns of yours.
My everbeating would cry tears 
of joy.
The others-they were yet to 
appear.
Caring Mother, o' so fair
 You were that beautiful bird 
filled with care.

The others came and were not 
alone. Their two suitors sat on 
the throne.
Rampage and rage why did you 
come?
I began to wither and wither 
slumping along. So very soon I-
the child of fines- became a 
human raceme. 
The droops of the Lily of the 
Valley became the slumping of 
my heart.
My lovely bird the enemy had 
taken you and the person you 
were is far from near.
For that divine nature left its 
intricate self and you became 
irretrievable my big bird.
All of your fairness died.
With that went my pride.
 
Mother, Mother what moved 
you so? 
Your intense spirt vanished only 
to supplement a monster. 
Mother, Monster and your tar 
filled lungs. 
How did I kill that liver that was 
so, so strong?
The lesson of pain was one you 
came to learn.
My darling bird why did you 
turn?
 
My lovely bird and your big 
brown eyes
I'll tell you once, but never 
twice.
Pain is only a flower for it 
blooms and dies
And a mistake can be killed as 
quickly as lice.
 You dear bird hurt me well. 
Though, haven't you heard?
Weakness is a souls greatest 
strength.
You brought me up, then you 
brought me down.
You haved helped, hurt, and 
hindered my blazing spirit.
A hero in my heart-I left you 
down in your deep black 
slumber. 
Escaping those terrible nights
To go for the town of delights. 


Details | Free verse | |

Puddle

My only friend
 Is the one in my head
'cause the one that I had
 was left behind in the sand
The sand of the hourglass
 waning away
never stopping
 never speeding
only burying your secrets
 grain by grain
Someone to hold
 something to have
All pain
 no gain
I reached out to touch you
 and you melted
as my fingers grazed
 your perfect face
I try to scoop up the puddle
 mould you back into shape
But I just kept slipping 
 in the mess 
that I used to live for


Details | Free verse | |

Dark love revival

Hate, depression, and sorrow
wrap me in a shroud of darkness
suffocating me, making me feel empty
it hurts not knowing happiness
yet there is light, hope to help me through
why is this little light
this tiny bit of warmth
in all this cold 
how does it survive
why does it stay
is it trying to help
is it love, is that why it's warm
is it hope
is that why it's bright
or is it a person
I love in a manifestation of light
It's the girl I love and always will
MY LOVE


Details | Free verse | |

Who am I

Who am  I inside? seeking, I left
On a voyage beyond horizon,
Unravelling the golden threads
Of twilight, a penumbra forsooth.
With the streams of water,sprouting
From duo springs of insight.
I was asked for obligate bath,
As a token to the serene foyer.
The dagger of repentance, they,
Coerced me, to tear open my chest.
Re-waking the besieged saint in me.
Led me to the mirrors in reliquary.
Our mirrors lie,realization dawned.
Here mirrors reflect incarnation,
Unlike replicas in ours.
Perplex and unique phenomenon,
Is to peek inside one's own.
A job of jiffy for one,
A Herculean task to other.
emm*


Copyright  26 august 2014


Details | Free verse | |

Cold Shadows of Subconscious

Cold shadows form
Blacker bars from locked window
Fall upon the remaining light and I
Wake caged memories as animals
Metaphors arouse the senses
Silence louder grips regret
And all I can do
Is think to run
But, instead I again hold on tighter
To my waning sanity
No signs insist on warning
Moments like rocks are falling
Always continue to pile up images within
That now stirs the soup thick dark 
And begin to play out
An unspeakable act 
Every year upon this very day
I watch from balconies, stuck 
In tragedies portrayed
And now I see…
What I forgot
Mother, lying
Covered about her sins
Beneath, I’m a child crying
Guilt turning always finds its way 
Around the coo-coo clock
Of hands and helpless
To time’s army, life’s ending, ticking, plot
If, but for an instance
I could be free
Free from what
A reality without her
And her needed love
When is enough, enough!
Please, subconscious just let me go…
And I promise
I’ll keep on… going and forgetting


Details | Free verse | |

Vertical Lines

Don't forget to cross the Ts
and dot your Is
because if you don't do that
they're just lines vertical on a page.
Lets us forget about the imperfect words
that make us cry
the vertical lines,
like jail bars hold us back.
Stand up and out and roar like a lion!

she is mine, I love her,
but I am quiet,
held back by the vertical lines
the black oily jail bars,
that keep my hear caged in
everytime I cry and people don't listen
the guard taps his nightstick upon
the vertical bars,
the imperfect feelings of pain and sadness
feeling like this it bores me 
feeling like this makes me sick
and I feel myself wanting to vomit
and shake the nervous feeling
of falling into a dark hole,
so I sit behind these vertical lines,
like cocaine lines, ready to snort up your nose,
like cigarettes lined in a perfect and neat row,
like empty wine and beer bottles
littering around my feet.

The vertical lines take me away from reality,
close my already blinded eyes
with a black blindfold.
These jail bars cross my soul,
chain my the ankles and wrists,
and choking me, holding my head under water,
I can't breath!!! Help me!
These vertical bars hold me back in life,
hold my emotions from coming out,
to tell you how I feel for you!
I no more want vertical lines,
I want to be free.
Drive horizontal roads that wined and turn around beautiful mountains
too take a deep breathe and share the beauty
to watch the horizontal horizon.
Too sit on a beach shore and write till the sun goes down
and the mermaids sings cheerful tunes
that uplift my spirits and break the remaining vertical lines
that bind and hold my heart in place.

There is nothing beautiful in a straight line,
let alone a vertical one.
Horizontal, vertical all bad in their own ways,
always trapping us, like jail bars or barbwire that streches across the open lands.
Love has no lines,
no boundaries,
so why should I have lines that bind me together
holding my head underwater,
till a spark lights a powder keg and blows me sky high
and I finally set myself free
and roam the horizon for ever.


Details | Free verse | |

The Lord's Peace

Peace
The chaos is shedding
Piece
Of happiness is floating
Cease
The madness..chaos is concealing
Peace
Comes from the Lord - 
To Him who mends us all...
To Him who forgives all of our sins
And downfalls
And answers everyone's calls


Details | Free verse | |

The Stranger Within Us All

As the sun goes down
The feral cat’s prowl 
Looking for mice, searching for rats
In the alley, bins full of out of date
And yesterday’s wrapping.
A tribute to Consumerisms detritus

On the ground a smiling face
Colonel Sanders, blocking a stagnant drain.
Slowly freezing as the frost descends, 
And up above the stars shine their scorn, upstaged
By the moon, seeking to unveil,
The cities vermin
Residents of the night.

The thief fox, screeches’ his indifference
At the stray dog, licking the remnants of last night’s kebab
And in the shadows behind the skips,
In a cardboard den
A pair of eyes glares across the alley
Seeking forgiveness that is not there,

From within this frail kingdom
A tiny light appears,
A fragment of hope, the start of a happy ending
 But no, it is a tab end fading
For the last drag has been taken
And the last can of comfort is now empty

And while we sit down to watch TV
To marvel at Attenborough’s view
To see the blue planet and the leopard seals kill
And "ahh" at polar bears, and gorillas in Brazil
All neatly packaged by nature’s quill.

Oblivious to the view outside
Beyond the living room window
A man will not wake

For when the dawn releases this night’s chill
He will be found, taken away,
Sanitized by his black body bag
Anonymous to this world

For we do not want to know
As we did not in life
A stain on the community
One less beggar to avoid

But look in the mirrors spell
And dare to What if?
You lost your job and your wife ran off
Your child was gone and your house taken away
Your mind now broken, 

Fear of humanity is but a step,
The comfort of being alone
 Led you down this dark alley.
The rat, and the fox your allies
For they too fear mans footsteps

Think on for I do not preach
Nor do I wish to teach
But remember Attenborough’s planet,
And the wonder of life
I did not see the animals behave this way,
Only mutual survival

Are we less than that we see?
Are we too busy or too proud?
I see no mourners here, only indifference
And when I die I wish for no mourners too.

Jon doe, your maker will mourn for you
And relative’s dead will feel your pain
And perhaps one day your community 
 Will learn to mourn for a stranger
For we are all strangers, when we look the other way
May you find peace Sir, whoever you may be?


Details | Free verse | |

Ball of Fire

Today is Doomsday.

Some believe today is Doomsday
Some say maybe the end of the year
However, do we really care?
How would the earth end?
In a ball of fire or 
would it swallow us up into puff of dust
in a matter of an hour..

I rather am buried under pile of snow.
Eternal Preservation "what a nice way to go

However do we have option in a world?
Where lunatics have taken over asylums
where deranged souls spreading like a social cancer 
Is doomsday  the answer..?


Details | Free verse | |

LET THE PAST BE

‘Let the past be’ he said
Why disturb peace
Why not let sleeping dogs lie
Why awaken the dead
Why dig old skeletons
For you can’t stand the omen.

Why not cherish tomorrow,
Why not anticipate for the future
For there’s much to look for
To correct the past mistakes
To create new life
To wave path for the next generation.

What’s done is done
You can’t spill over split milk
And you can’t change the past mistakes
But can forbid the repetition thereof
And let bygones be bygones.

Yesterday is gone
And it remain in the past
For all that happened
Simply let it go
And concentrate ‘rather’
On the future
For the past is history.


Details | Free verse | |

Party

Celebration comes when we see fit But we can only celebrate just a little bit 'Cause with all the travesty that surrounds us We look for a good escape, And it does not matter Neither the time nor the place. One man's trash, Is another man's treasure. So is one man's victory Another man's defeat. Never do both the men Run at a parallel. Thus, who deserves happiness When they both meet. This must be a familiar trait All humans tend to have in common; Plus fighting for our wants, And the things we don't see coming. We must find some form of joy, The smallest spec of it in our lives. Even if some of the joy Will bring trouble sometimes. So, we simply set our minds As long as the moment feels really right We will let tomorrow happen If we make through the night


Details | Free verse | |

My Mind


My mind        

My mind is a prison
Overpopulated with remorse
Incarcerated by images of sin
My mind refuses rehabilitation
It cowers in a concrete corner
Face in hands; protesting parole
My mind punishes me with guilt 
Terrorizing my thoughts 
A reoccurring rape of recidivism
My mind is unforgiving
It confiscates my hope
Segregates my dreams in isolated darkness
Allowing occasional one hour visits of  promise.
My mind is a complicated collage of convicting confessions
Callously castrating my continuing calls for clemency
My mind mocks mercy
It Mimics moments of misery In a mental mirror
Molesting my mild memories in a riot of regrets
My mind wants no truce
It gladly guards my goals behind gilded gates of grief
Giving me a life sentence of worry
My mind is a prison that I cannot escape
Every night I am summoned from my dim-lit cell
And violently beaten into submission
Here, I repent
I pray for a pardon
And although the Almighty has given me a reprieve
My mind assures me that death is my only release


Details | Free verse | |

A Genesis mimesis part 2

Adam from and by his side Eve blessed to replenish                                                             to rule over the things moving land air and sea giving meat to all                                       the green herb the fruit bearing seed after His kind it was good										             Blessed Poet potentate and man saw everything good on the sixth page    											heavens and earth finished with multitude to dwell ending his work on seventh page										blessed set apart this day for the gracious Host rested even now men search                          for metaphors similes to fill pages poems and prose words of worth                                                 to artfully describe creation life imitates life after His kind                                                   even in a fallen world after satans pride Eve being naive Adam listening to her voice                                            rather than God's the Poet maker Jesus in similitude                                                           yet He is without sin humbled Himself being born like we                                                              the true light came to heal creation walked again on the water                                                        for all to believe the Lamb's blood shed thy sin be forgiven thee                                          the Lord of the sabbath still plowing the way the Seed died and rose again 	                                             					God said bringing forth much fruit watering with words                                                             blessed are the poets of love saved justified 									redeemed resting in promised words from above                                                                  waiting to fly away to greener pastures 									          	a new heaven and new earth we look forward                                                                     to our Maker's life within the Poet's breath


Details | Free verse | |

The Eternal Infernos of Pain

Front and Center!
Those Gates adorned with pearls in Heaven.
White angels soaring. 

If by chance, 
Ordered to enter;
Through St. Peter's Permission; 
I demand from you chancellor; 
A swift insanity plea, submission. 
For this troubled soul is plagued, 
By vast displays of wicked ways. 

None lost. 
Courtesy of meticulous examination. 
Love lost. 

Diligence pending Investigation. 
Key Evidence, perpetually documented 
In Sin's ominous catalog. 
Rebuke my Judge! 
For multitudes of shortcomings, 
He failed to ascertain. 

Moreover, present was He, 
When Satan drafted me. 
First round,
Pick three.
His Fantasy League...
"The Eternal Infernos of Pain" 

JS Lambert



Details | Free verse | |

Squids, like Sunshine

You knew I was angry

As we walked apart, along Spadina
Through the pungent summer air of Chinatown
Past the various sea creatures, dried or iced
And fruits I don’t know piled atop sacks of rice
I closed my eyes and let only the breeze run over me
A million particles per second
Imagining I could imagine every one
I let in the sunlight
And wondered in that amazement you only get
By thinking about everyday things
As the heat danced on my skin
And I thought about how it had been
Through eight minutes and twenty seconds of space
To land radiant on my face
I let things go and walked with you again
I felt stand-offish as you took my hand
But was in awe it was there at all
Or that you love me


Details | Free verse | |

Hiring mankind for a dollar

you are f u c ki n g FIRED


Details | Free verse | |

Vows

I take you to be the love of my life, 
To have and to hold and to hit and to crush
For better and for worse when worse is unspeakable
For richer, for poorer when money is spent on drugs and booze and porn
And there is not enough money left for groceries and school clothes.
In sickness and in health when I have to sneak to buy medication
and you call in sick to go to the race.
From this day forward because I have no place to go.
The shelters are full. No room in the inn.
I'm not serious, they say, because I did not call the police
When you choked me last night.
Instead I hid, huddled in the closet behind the locked door, 
Holding my baby and praying that she would not be next.
Until death do us part because I have tried to leave
So many times and you drag me back.
Love bears all things, 
Believes all things, 
Hopes all things, 
Endures all things. 
Love never ends.
Love never ends.
Love never ends.


Details | Free verse | |

"The Cold Line Of Living With Eyes Open And Def Ear's"

I woke up
My room shines bright
Moon light is pretty tonight
Barely strenght to move but effort is my fight
Clever move to stand up
Now the walls blow up
The sky is dark
Moon becomes red
Candles turn off
An old blood mad like hell
Again same story
Is our time to leave
To die
Let's go sleep

I woke up again
Oh it was a dream
A rare and fast one
Now let's stand up
I only test my limits
Not god's
Big bang
Walls fall
Kindom sleeps
We are destined for this
Kindom falls
We shine bright
Moon sleeps helplessly 
The sun is far from home
God save us all
Help us
Arrows fly torched with flame
God believe us
A night of deception have woken
Resurrection of a statue
The cross is not carried by no one
Then let this arrows burn us alive
Torched with flames 
Oh it burns us all alive
Saved by messiah
Oh we still die
Help us all

A fair toll to pay
A bright moon to worship
A beatiful night to sleep off
A world of desires rises
A mankind full of sins
A god mad at his creation!


Details | Free verse | |

Breath let Go

The earth shudders and the dust of a thousand years
lifts into the sky like a blanket thrown up in exultation
and beneath this blanket plates grind together
in sudden need
A craving to bring dried and edged flesh
with the moisture of the oceans above
together once more
and cry out in the joy of ecstasy to release their pressure
	And be at once reconciled

And the world let’s out its breath,
gives up what is most sacred to it
in reverence of this Moment:

And I dare say this moment is mine,
to the child that toiled the fields
hoe in hand and the patterns in the soil
the patterns in the soul through which water poured
and escaped in pores like water through a parched man’s fingers
and patterns fled this farm 
Leaving a parched man lamenting the presence of fingers
in times of thirst,

And to the child toiling
           in the fields 
the pattern is in the pitch of his shoulders
and the pounding of the sun
the pattern that should never seep
through unseen holes

but it seeps
down his back and across his fingers
upon his hoe it dribbles down and finds the escape
of patterns long lost
and the sweat of his toil
slips through the gaps in his soil
and the heaving of his shoulders
is lost with the patterns,	

So this old farmer he does not tread his fields,
sheltered behind wood and warmth of fire
he huddles in his world of four walls
and dares not the fields outside
Where await the failures
of his toil,
and when the earth shuddered
in joy of this moment
Knowing in its wisdom all that was to be known
the earth shudders and the dust of not so many years
It lifts into the sky like a blanket thrown up in exultation

And beneath it all

Sees the farmer

The pattern of his toil

And lo and behold
It was not wasted
But a hands width beneath
The soil that caked his world
And by his own hand
Hidden as it were
The patterns of his toil
And the story that is told
Bittersweet
In the exultation of a breath
Let go.


Details | Free verse | |

Passion And Shame Torment Him

otra vez,otra vez` I do, say and say again I am the rock star of the ring I risk my life again and again for fame, Some might think of my passion As just being poetic and practical Or simply culture or unethical However, nevertheless not when my life is on the line Stronger than a herd of Buffaloes Faster than the Speed of a race horse, He is now broken free of his corral A streak of fury, rushes me Despite my fear of dying, My main focus is to Take the bull down by its horn >> I looked deep into his eyes, I saw mingling of rage I carefully swung the cape, A taunt of furling red Aiming for its horns The crowd roars, while The old ladies sob for the bull The men cheers for Salvatore the Matador Nothing more stimulating than the ladies with the beautiful smiles The bull is going to die


Details | Free verse | |

Teardrops From Bitter Clouds

5/21/11-5/22/11

They told me it was going to be sunny
I decided to go to the beach
Blue beauty…
No, I’m not the same as you can see

I soar off like a distant train
swaying…staying
Connected to the tracks
overwhelmed by rain
You weepie...
don’t you know who made sorrow?
Wait…do not scurry
Tearless for tomorrow
because that day will bring forth
Brighter dusks…hidden beneath the surface

Wherever we roam,
I’ll collect the foam
from the attacking waves
Masked with bitterness
led by the wind
Bitter clouds sending rain
I guess I’ll remain
Home alone
And watch a pale moonlight
Shone in my withering curtains
I’m certain
There will be brighter days
in this summer vacation
that’s next in line
where we will dine
forever on a soaring tide
clueless…undefined

Overcome the clouds…
Let out victory
Let them know
The key to life is positivity
Or treasured love
Beneath the surface
In other words,
You are marvelous…a blue beauty
You are a dolphin against an unfriendly tide
Sending teardrops from bitter clouds
Never meant for harm…
Keep me away from this charm
You send from your silky…
lushing…gushing…
form brushing beside a shipwrecked terrain
Paradise lies in silky clouds
Sending irresistible rain
Sending no doubts
Or heart-breaking reminders
Pouring out acid rain from bitter clouds
Teary skies…how time flies…
Sending drenched-up memories…
Cuddling to the soul
Oh, how time flies
A cruel enemy…how time could be
a loathly fiend
Sending acid rain
From tilted clouds
immediately drains
the hour…unaware of the time

I wish I could fall in your arms
While the bitter clouds alters into charms
Remain positive and fit
Don’t lie in the ocean floor
There is a deep pit…be vigilant
Stay awhile, will you?
Tearless for tomorrow
If you are made out of
Droplets and charms
My smile will warm up
The cloudy day…
and send the rain
Under the water
Under the teary sea
is where our destiny will be
the lovely clouds 
will be our shrouds 
it tickles my feet
and your wiggling fins

Stay awhile, will you?
Tearless for tomorrow
If you are made out of
Droplets and charms
Snuggle
In my arms 


Details | Free verse | |

For a friend in pain

you're a silent person inside, that i know..
so a single insult or pain would pose a great blow..
When in pain close your eyes and drift..
think of of happiness and joy, that would give you a lift..

Anger and grieve, please don't let it rust..
In your heart don't let it last..

know that jokes come and go..
sometimes jokes go far beyond "tolerable"
so when hit in the heart so hard,
stay with your guard..
Maybe tomorrow's a better joke..
maybe tomorrow's your day..

Because every "tomorrow", we change, we grow, we love more and joke more..

Sorry for today..

We had to see those sad, sad, eyes..


Details | Free verse | |

How do I resist this love

I'm trying to concentrate, on what needs to be done
But with him standing right there
Right before my eyes, holding back 
So many emotions, mix inside, I try not to cry
For this anger, has me pushing back, deep in the ditch
But, when he tries to touch me, how do I resit

My heart feels the truth, the truth on my feelings
It feels the love, I' m hiding from him
I continue to work, avoiding any eye contact
Getting his things, so he can be at ease

No, he touches me, my body wants to melt 
Melt deep inside, as I feel no air to breathe
But, has he places his hands around my body
Bringing me in closer and closer
My body stumbles to the floor
My inside are tingly in many, many ways

How do I resist this love, I have for him
He was my best friend, a diary at night
Security to my soul, there is no way I can let go
My heart it melts for him, my wall wants to go up
Keeping guards on his musical notes
Reaching his hand out, lifting me from the floor
Trying to show me, I'm his

I dazed into his eyes, as I realize, I'm truly in love 
I'm in love with him, yes husband dear
It's going to take some time, for my heart to be at peace
To let him go, I can not do, for I will not forgive or forget
But , I can give it a try, give love another chance

See what fate can truly do, for me, and also you


Details | Free verse | |

Untitled II

I interpret what I see
hoping that it's on target
response
you hope it's what is accepted
or is it?
I read you and then you disappear
no answer
oh dear...did I cross the line?
quickly I try to amend my words with more words
have to be heard...when reading was the culprit
or was it?
oh the written word...(sigh)
IMs become obselete since there's no one 
to answer to...
so I write to plead my case
hoping to propitiate the soul
that may have been hurt.
But then again...
did I misinterpret the no answer?
Hmmm...


Details | Free verse | |

You're My Plague

You plague me with your sweltering disease My heart throbs in unease You carry me off to a far-off island Your breeze keeps me flowin’…scraping sand Your names escapes my lips I tell myself, “Get a grip, dude…” But you decided to intrude... My blood drips to the floor I’ve been losing balance… The instant you pushed me aside Your quietude devours me… I can’t help, but hide… I feel horribly disheartened…feelin’ too insignificant To start my day with a good note Too discouraged to be motivated to run… You trade me your pain in the past I consume it like a bear My stomach is churning persistently…you’re running too fast… I’m dowsed in despair My eyes stare vacantly…into space…they roam happily Your vigilance keeps me safe and sound…I dwell in your tranquility Your dreams caress my own… This intriguing comfort never makes me feel alone I’m under your dazzlin’ spell… This is heaven – not living hell! I’ve been bruising myself over you…for a while now The moment you abandoned me that night… Your rejoicing mends my gash…heals my mind… I think better of you – everything’s black and white I feel so exquisite when I’m around you… So inspired to reveal my might…just shine your light On me…and remember to meet me at sun rise… But I still feel malnourished… By your sweltering disease My heart refuses to beat in perfect rhythm – my high hopes nearly perished By your forceful breeze…pushing me on my knees I’m stumbling off my feet – I’m not at all pleased I’m not in the mood to be teased… I’m suffering…I’m not discreet How did you push me off my feet? Why do you make ME feel so damn miserable and incomplete? You plague me with your sweltering disease My heart pounds as I fall upon my blood-stained knees You carry me away to an unknown place Your voice still rings in my ears… I glance at your admirable face I’ve faced you way too many times – Your sparkling with majestic brilliance and pure grace


Details | Free verse | |

For my Beloved Sister

I fled his tyranny
Not thinking
Not considering
That you will be next

Escape,
The only thing 
I thought of.

From the pain
The humiliation
The bruises
The hurt
The suffering

Never look back
Never think of it
Never consider the consequences
Of being free

Your beautiful cheek
stained with the tears
of my actions.
A young life shattered
by my desperation

I am sorry
I should have thought
That you would be next

In your innocence
In your beauty
You were perfect
For his perversion

You are the porcelain doll 
I dropped on the ground
Shattered into a million pieces

I may have escaped
But the guilt
Will never leave
Will never go away

It will gnaw rodent like
at the fine interior of my soul
at the casing of my heart
Till I can take it no more

I am sorry sister
For not realizing 
That in my escape
I have brought doom
Unto you


Details | Free verse | |

Beauteous you

Your smile is luminous.. it brightens the dark
and lonely night until the sun rises...

Your eyes are unforgettable.. memories
of looks you cast upon me will never fade...

Your zeal is unrelenting.. overcoming
every obstacle on the path to success...

Your kindness is endless.. within you
is an eternally gentle spirit...

Your intellect is unmatched.. many will come
and go but none shall attain such brilliance...

Your wit is lively.. Warming the spirit
of all those who hear it...

Your soul is pure.. it shall not be tainted
by the darkness of the world...

Your love is courageous.. for it braved a sea
of torment to reach my heart...

These things I took for granted
and I say sincerely...

I hope you find someone who will cherish
every moment spent with you...

As I did.. And always will.


Details | Free verse | |

A Sad Time

Its a sad time for me.
Covered from head to toe in insecurities.
All I do is try and cover for my mistakes.
My misjudgments.
My displacement...
But what about those times of joy?
Gone within a blink of an eye.
It seems that my world would be one of pity.
but no its not pity more like a self hatred that runs deep.
It covers my heart with hard lace and frosted glass.
Covering me in something for show.
I used to glow.
Like a bright light.
That was also just for show. 
A lie filled to the brink.
dishonest and out of synch.
Thats my story for now.
Im just a show and a sad story.
A sad time.


Details | Free verse | |

I love you

Baby...Baby...Baby...
Baby? 
Baby?
I love you...
I really do...
I love you...
I do...

We met on a strange day
A day that remains a slight haze...
I'm still quite amazed
I was wandering in a daze, when I stumbled upon your face.

An everlasting sight, in my memory, imprinted in my brain.
You played me your melody...
What I see will never fade
What I feel will never change
What I hear, will never escape

Baby please, please, lets just stay the same
Or i'm scared, I might go insane...
Dry out all my veins,
and slowly start forgetting your name.

Your eyes, are home
My mind, is blown
Kiss me, Baby, lets go home.


Details | Free verse | |

A long walk home

As stranger to all he was known
 A man with a hidden past
 A long walk home

 He traveled many a mile
 A rugged man he became

 Across the land he wondered
 Searching for his soul to find
 Forgetting his very own name
 Only companion his thoughts

 Witness to a tender sight
 a Father and son Moment
 Taking his heart back
 to where he belongs

 Without his old troubles
 It's time for him to go home
 Follow the train tracks 
 into the glowing light

 With awareness  he conceives
 The roads that he traveled
 Was nothing more
 Then a long walk home

 Nalanti Goosen©2012 
 All rights reserved


Details | Free verse | |

Deep Down Inside

In my heart, there's a tune dying to come out 
The solitude makes me feel so carefree and you don't talk trash about me like some
I feel like I've been taken advantage of...what's that all about? 
This song needs to have more passion...make me taste freedom 
Don't let the drown...
Deep down inside, 
I need you to leave my side

I'll meet you when I begin my journey 

Deep down inside, 
I want you to set me free from bondage
I need your support to push aside
The waves of fears - it overwhelms my heart
My dreams are nowhere in sight 
Deep down inside, 
I feel your attention is on me
I know you have sympathy...
Deep down inside...

I tried to speak my mind,
But you healed it and I started to unwind
I strayed away into my perplexing maze
But I was guided by your graceful gaze
Deep down inside,
I felt truly happy to find someone who feels for me and there's no need to hide my feelings, though I don't fully abide
In the tranquil light
I should've known that you were right
About where I stand
 I'll be a man...
Deep down inside, 
I think I can
I think I can

I'll meet you when I arrive on the other side 

Deep down inside, 
I want you to set me free from the emotional mess
I need your support to push aside
The waves of misery - it weighs down my heart
My nightscares are gone this holy night
Deep down inside, 
I feel your eyes on me lovingly
I know you have serenity...
Deep down inside...

Feelings of losing you 
Floods my thoughts, burning me with terror and distress
Hoping for a miracle to make me as fresh as morning dew
My blood is at a high temperature...watch out or you'll be caught up in my mess...
is there anything to address?
do you have something to confess?
'Cause deep down inside, 
I know you're hiding something from me 
I believed in your fairytales...
I put my trust in your spellbinding words
You don't have a clue what emotions strike me at this very moment
You made me look like an idiot in front of everybody...
Now I'm considered a "nobody"!!
Your speech enticed me 
You won't listen to my side
Of the story
But deep, deep down inside, 
You care...do you care to tell me what's going on?
All of my faith in you has died
why do you pretend that I'm gone?
maybe it would've served you right if I didn't exist....
You scared away my confidence...now I feel neglected
Deep, deep, deep down inside

Deep down inside, 
I wanted you to know what upsets me the most is hearing you boast 

I need to forgive you to move forward
Passed the challenges in this race - my legs are aching, but I won't complain just like my classmates in my smelly dorm
My feet run swiftly and I'm soaked as if I was caught up in a rainstorm
My gifts have more meaning than it ever did before  
Deep down inside, 
I feel you're ignoring me on purpose 
I know you're suffering from this heartless disease
Deep down inside...
You haven't really put my mind at ease
You were there to please
Your own heart's wicked ambitions and admirations
While I'm taking a while to recover...

Now I feel unimportant and unsure 
And I'm screaming silently... I wish
I can get over you...
I'll get over it... I have the man guts
To move on and find someone else who will cherish me, not treat me like rubbish You erased my fantastic pictures of the joyous future...that was very uncalled for - you act so immature

Do I feel a special connection with you? 
the answer is there, 
Deep down inside...


Details | Free verse | |

Beautiful Children

Singing around in love;
Smiles built from the ground.
Holding hands in the dance;
Laughing with brothers and sisters,
All in His Glorious Name.
Throughout His perfectly sculpted land:
Look around because this is it;
Look around because this is love;
Look around and know, understand, comprehend,
Rejoice because you are perfect;
You are God's beautiful children!


Details | Free verse | |

the bad mother

there once was a bad mother
she forced her daughter
to do all kinds of things
that she did not want to do
she thought she knew how to  help
but she only made it worse
what she didn't know
is that the daughter knew
all along what she wanted
but she was young and helpless
her mother told all the doctors
and all the therapists
that her daughter had a problem
and that she was suffering
but she didn't know why
the problem was that the mother
was too intrusive in her life
and she thought that she could
change the way her daughter thinks
we all know this is not true
her problem was that
she simply did not
understand

so one day
the daughter
found help in another town
she sent them a letter
saying she wishes to leave
and they sent her back
a train ticket
to come live with them
the daughter was happy 
and lived happily
ever after

THE END


Details | Free verse | |

If I Could Talk To God Today

If I could talk to God today
Humble praise and thanks I would give
For all the blessings I have received
None of which do I deserve 
For any good I may have done
Was by grace through His son

If I could talk to God today, I would ask
Lord, when I was a little child
Why was I so painfully shy?
Whenever strangers were around
I would always run and hide
Reading and daydreaming all the while

If I could talk to God today, I would ask
Lord why does evil continue to exist?
I was only seven, abused and blindly robbed
I was lucky, my life not brutally snuffed!
To perverts this is just a game 
So many die while others bear lingering shame

If I could talk to God today, I would ask
Forgiveness for the foolish years
Opportunities missed to do some good
For the many times I put Him last
For unnecessary fears and wasted tears
The empty years spent ‘living it up’

If I could talk to God today, I would ask
For mercy not just for me
For children like me whose trust betrayed
For all of us who have lost the way
Some day I know there will be peace on earth
When you come to live in hearts and homes

Note:  For Walayee Whitlock' s "My Darkest Childhood Memories" Contest



Details | Free verse | |

One Loving Kiss

Searching the internet, looking for your name,
If I could just replay our last five minutes 
I’d tell you I was scared but I did love you.
In-spite of all my faults, I know you loved me.

You’d fly across the ocean to visit me and 
patiently wait to spend time together,
Our trans-Atlantic romance was exciting 
but was it enough to make a life together.

You asked me to marry you and fly away
to Germany where you’d make me a home.
Afraid to hurt you, I’m sorry I never told you 
I had unexpectedly met my true soul mate.

I drove you to the airport, with one loving kiss
You left thinking there may be a chance for us.
I never replied, sorry -  the kiss was goodbye.




Written October 1, 2012
For Michael J. Falotico’s contest
“Where’s the Blame”


Details | Free verse | |

Goodbye, Adieu, Maa Al Salama

Goodbye, Adieu, Maa Al Salama,
I visited once and shall never visit again,
For I am born for only one day,
Carrying many events along with me,

I shall spread my wings and fly today at TWELVE P.M,
A tear shall drop from my eye as I have my last glance
To all the people that lived with me for TWENTY-FOUR HOURS
I will try to smile as I leave,
But I can not promise not to cry,

You shall not see me again, unless...
Time repeats itself and I come back,
The ones that took pictures or videos shall remember the moments
While those who wrote, felt, and cried shall feel the moments 
Yet those moments shall last forever,

I love you all, every single one,
I enjoyed the time I've spent with you,
I'm sorry for the harsh times I've done for some,
Please forgive me, but that's how I was destined to be...

Remember me in the lovely moments
Treasure me in your minds
For if you do, I shall become a story told to many,
And a fairy tale that never ends

Goodbye, Adieu, Maa Al Salama,
For I have FORTY-NINE MINUTES left to spend with you
So enjoy what's left,
Remember that I've always loved,
And remember me as...
April in 2008...





Maa Al Salama: Means goodbye in Arabic.


Details | Free verse | |

Am I Still Forgiven

I did it again; I need forgiven.
Will He still forgive me even though I've fallen before?
I've fallen into these same sins countless times before;
I still haven't learned my lesson.
I am an ignorant hypocrite.
Am I still forgiven?


Details | Free verse | |

Smile anyway

It is better to love and lost Well, you have heard the saying                                               but what I was trying to say is to never love at all                                                             that would be sad and that would make a clown frown                                                       while searching for words to make you smile                                                                     Is that a trick question you are the one judging                                                                with that poetry police and destroying going on                                                             What thinketh a poet and you did not know it                                                                    it is all fun and games until you have won                                                                    Who made this a contest anyway needless to say                                                              I am going to give you a peace of my mind pardon pun or not                                   whether I win this contest or not I think                                                                          You should know You have already have one                                                                And by the way I hope you find all you are looking for                                                     love you like a sis and this I would have no one miss                                                        Jesus loves you  Thanks for sharing always                        *                            *                           - scientist find blue iceberg/ A blue iceberg is visible after the ice from above the water melts, causing the smooth portion of ice from below the water to overturn. The rare blue ice is formed from the compression of pure snow, which then develops into glacial ice.


Details | Free verse | |

Ventana Thoughts

These are all ruminations that arose from a recent backpacking trip in the Ventana Wilderness


Needing to bring spiritual realities
into the press of raw humanity,
amongst the most humble
the dreamer seems visionary.


Addiction is a mirror;
if I look into it for long
I will see myself
attempting suicide.


With my conscious mind in tow
I descend into my heart
through imagination,
there learning your memory
is the sunshine
each new day bears.


A covey of fat
mountain quail and me,
we surprised each other
on the trail this morning
at just past six,
the significance of this not eluding me
having already had my manna.


In a field of false lupin
spilling the earth 
an unearthly blue
surrounded by young madrone
of vibrant green and neon brown
sprung from the ashes
of disastrous fire
i chanced an encounter
with One who has all power
in taking a chance
on His love


They are
perhaps not stars
but distant openings
windows to beyond
to back where i started from,
ever His intention
i find my way home


It would make more sense
were my gray matter
yellow, or white
with a goldenrod center,
given the scrambled
and fried responses
it comes out with 


Little glimpses
leaving hunger for more,
poetry draws me into 
an other's life:
just because I wasn't there
doesn't mean
I can't recall it.


A non-entity with ambitions
inured to my own strangeness,
being published gave an air of respectability,
the way squirrels are saved
from looking like rodents
by their bushy tails.


In process he found
a self-worth being, then
a self worth becoming, and
a self worth revealing.


Details | Free verse | |

Words That Fit the Inexplicable

My brother is an osprey
with an eagle arrogance
And - although he adores a forest
I have the ‘sauce’ on him - he
abhors pine bathroom spray

His eyes are fire opals of mirth
His laughter - the dusk of an 
endless Summer heat
His legs - straddle the valley of death

I picture him in a strong canoe paddling through
a river of garden flowers 
 his spirit rising with swift wings-
 and the will to fall 

 Suzanne Delaney


Details | Free verse | |

Just writing without stopping

Random Free Write: 

Just flowing - writing
and not stopping to think
or even to lift my pen
I kept going and the words seemed to have no end
Understanding that the process is a simple one
Love everyone and 
stear free of the wicked one

I'm not sure if it was winter or spring
But, I gave way to all the flaws and  imperfections
and realized that this is me
The change came when I saw fit
and not when someone else decides

It's not hard to forgive
And even easier to forget
Does that not reflect love and also what it begets?
Except too many hold grudges and even
pretend to be angry beyond whats necessary
Caught up in someone elses problem
and not dealing with their own is a hard burden to carry
Let it go
stop negativity where it begins

Cut people short if you have to
because this is your life you have to live
Be on the lookout for those looking to devour you
Pray for those who do ill sh@! to you
Respond in a way that makes them realize they love you
and hope it inspires change

Still maintain dignity and move on to something new
Growing, building up treasures for a place greater than
you can even dream to go
It's the simple things that help make life flow
I could go on and on with this practice flow
Writing and stoping to think or lift my pen
This is one of those poems that didn't make it to the waste bin.


Details | Free verse | |

Mothers

Of all the wonderful things
God did create,
By far the best
Is your father's mate

A mother gives
Unquestioning love
And raises her children
With a tender glove

When all others have
Their work done
She is still at work
With daughter and son

She asks for nothing
In return,
Except perhaps for her children
To somehow learn

What makes good
Better than bad
And therefore a life
Happy, not sad

No easy chore,
As we all know
But every mother
An extra mile will go.

Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful Soup mothers, and, in fact, all mothers
everywhere.  You are the foundation stone of civilization.




Details | Free verse | |

Lessons I've Learned From Crazy Stupid Love

I fell hard for this movie when it first came out man. Each time I watch it, something new is revealed to me. 
Welp. Here’goes. 

1. Don’t get Lazy with Love. 

It’s interesting to note that most of us are often referred to as someone who is smart, funny and charming in the beginning of our relationship with that special someone that we have come to deeply, madly & truly love. 

Then, we get Lazy. 

We stop being smart. We get stupid. 
Our humor or sense of humor comes to a dead-end. 
We don’t try anymore. We get bored. We become boring. 
This is how most relationships come to an end. Because we have deliberately made the choice to stop loving. Ourselves. And our partners. But what would happen if we kept on loving ourselves & our partners? What if we got smarter, funnier & more charming each & everyday of our lives? If you must be lazy, be lazy in it’s purest form: being halfway asleep on the couch with your lover. 

2. Don’t get Crazy with love. 

If you have ‘lost your mind’ you are no longer loving. You are lusting & obsessing. True love is all about ‘using your mind’ rather than ‘losing your mind’. It requires you to be not only sane but deeply profound. True love will enable & equip you to be patient & persevere. It will also empower you to use every “wrinkle” in your mind to create. True love does not destroy. True love never destroys relationships. It builds & edifies them. 

3. Don’t get Stupid with love. 

A person ‘in true love’ is not stupid. Even if you were, you will do just about everything to hide your stupidity. You’ll get smarter & wiser. You’ll go at great lengths to memorize all kinds of poetry, music, and quotes to somehow inspire & deeply touch the person you love. (Note: Not to impress, mesmerize & get in their pants) You know you’ve fallen out of love (and into lust) if you start doing the dumbest things you’ve ever done. 
This happened to my friend Chris a few years back in his relationship, and I started noticing how he was changing. A person in true love is always developing him/herself to grow & mature into a wiser lover! 

There really is something special about this movie. If you haven’t seen it yet, go to 1channel.ch , type in the movie title, and watch away


Details | Free verse | |

This is Who I Am

I am me; and I know there are going to be people who do not like me

But I can not change the way the feel about me and I'm okay with that

Why change them, when I wouldn't want them to change me?

They are who they are, and I am who I am

This is who I am: I am Emily, a person that tries very hard not to judge people

This is who I am: I am Emily, I will be anyones friend; It does not matter what they did

It matters that you take them in your arms and hold them and tell them your here for them

Even if they walk away, it matterd that you showed them you cared


Details | Free verse | |

Atonement

The image of guilt has been etched
in our conscience
from the moment we are born
sketched in charcoal, shades of black
and partly gray, sharp against white, 
bitter truths against the light

A contrast of shadows, shapes, 
Right against wrong
Seeking the confessional for
layers of a coat of shame

A shedding of the shroud of self loathing
A lifting of the weight of anxiety
that pulls with the force of gravity
against the axis of one's self esteem

It does not necessarily always come wrapped in a box
where solitary confinement
is surrounded by hushed voices
wrapped in anonymity
bathed in the holy waters of forgiveness
sprinkled with a blessing
and a promised Hail Mary

It can come from a child
left with the evidence
of a crumb
still clinging to 
a chin

Or can come
as the last breath
from the one
facing death

It is accompanied by the soft sound
of relief,
a sigh,
a whispered voice groping at the frayed edge
in hope of salvation
of hope for forgiveness

We are born
knowing the score

When keeping the weight
of the shame
holds more
than we
can
bear




______________________________________ 
Contest: "The Confessional"


Details | Free verse | |

Truth

Took a walk to Emmaus
once
found a brother and a son
lovers
it turned out

happily forever after
forgiven
imagine that
just like
the book said


Details | Free verse | |

Gay

I am gay.
I'm not a disease, I'm not a problem
I'm not an affliction
I don't need treatment.
I don't need help
I'm not sick
I'm not confused
I'm not a sin.

I am gay.
I'm your daughter
Your sister
Your friend
Your co worker
Your classmate
Your acquaintance
A complete stranger

I am gay.
I need love, just like you
I need smiles
I need support
I need a hug
I need a friend
I need a family
I need acceptance
I need understanding
I need you

I am gay.
I know what love is
I know what pain is
I know what hate is
I know what life is

I am gay.
And I need you to love me
The same way you loved me before you knew

I am gay.
And I have experienced hate
From more people than just you

I am gay.
And I wont change. 
I wont give up.
I wont back down.
I wont pretend.
I wont lie.
I wont deny.
I wont hide.
I wont hurt.

I am gay. 

And that's okay.


Details | Free verse | |

Father

Father dear father
Copartner in my life
flesh of my flesh
bone of my bones 
alpha adam ancestor 
 
Daddy growing up 
you’re my hero
my idol my mentor
i look to you for strength 

Papa why do you drink
why are you so angry 
why do you hate
why the shame

Pop following in your footsteps
i am a drunk too
why do i do what I hate 
so much like you

Papa we are getting older
you are close to death
too late too soon 
to know what i know

Dad many years gone
i still miss you
I know now You 
Loved Me

Love, your son …


Details | Free verse | |

i reckon this took me by surprise

the words 
you speak
i taste forbidden flavors
bittersweet
i see us
standinq
in the midst of foul air
you are
not here
i am
not there
the only diease
in Italy
was the happeninq of
love
demons
reside above us
my skin crinqed
to see your eyes watery
and thin
and foolish me
to think you speak
aqain
i thouqht you would
speak aqain
i wait 
and wait
and wait
you let another murmur escape

this

alone

carved

my 

hate


Details | Free verse | |

Redo You

 Don't speak--- just read. 

 Take captive the thoughts 
   
 you ought to heed. 

 Imagine them 

 d 
 r 
 o 
 p 
 p 
 i 
 n 
 g 
   
 from your mind.    

 Take them back--- 

 Press rewind. 

 Oops, how do you undo? 

 Next time better think it through. 

 Forgive, forget. 

 Never regret. 

 Just hit reset. 

 Now, start anew, 

 and redo you.


Details | Free verse | |

Dressed for death act two -Great Physician's durable clothing

Because sin death entered in is for sure a marry heart does good like a cure  											Good news for men like a new leaf fallen from a tree now a dying spirit a fading leaf  										the Glorious cross a promise kept from the time Eve wept 													He is our life from Adam to the One healing enter in the only begotten Son 												dwelling in the Light only He is He was and is to come 														The only wise true Living God conquerer of all evil the Amen													It is done "The first and the last, which was dead, and is alive"													Heals by believing He forgiveth all your sins heals all you diseases                                                                                                                                                                  		His grace keeps us from plagues those written and those not 													 as far as east to west the Lamb of God the Lamb without spot													has taking away our sins with the shedding of His blood														Writes His laws on upon our hearts our sins remembering not													The sins of all He bore upon the tree causing are sins to return unto thee                                									 Rose again on third day the Justified doing away with our body of sin and death											all points as we yet He is without sin pleading to the sinners enter in												the Day spring on High the True Prophet Priest and King														Here is wisdom Honor Jesus Lord of lords King of kings the Lord our God King 											Garments of praise alpha and omega the first the Last the same													Granting repentance forgiveness of your sins in Your name 													The Lord Jesus The name above all names our all in all                                                                                                                                                                               		our sins separated us from Him that giveth Life to all   														Now by faith we have been grafted in Jesus the tree of life          												           	Us with His own self  He adorned clothing us in righteousness and salvation 												Lambs wife married none other than Jesus our great physician


Details | Free verse | |

the Human Seasons: Elements At War and Peace, Part IV

                                                                 4.

Each dawn, the cold steps back a pace,
And in the lengthening light the tender green steals up
Through the retreating ice and snow
As the lands rise fresh and free from the deathlike sleep again,
To play the full young mother dressed out in life itself,
Strolling through the warming, waxing sun.

Growth and generation give the lie
To the empty time so short before
Everything renewed proclaims its exoneration from stasis
And beauty runs riot, freed from its long waiting
To declare its immortality again.

And for he and she love grows anew
In the hopes reborn in the spring's thaw
The heart's slow healing gathers force with the blooming 
As they pull the threads of their lives back together,
Sewing them closer with trust and forgiveness,
Going on again in the thousand-odd ways
That make a single life of two.

Love trumpets again its smug triumph
Through the wakening world,
For it too is one of the old, strong forces,
The one that holds together what would fain break itself apart
To its own rack and ruin;
The ultimate surgeon,
Healing with slow steely cuts 
Cauterizing the strangely sweet wells of pain
With unquenchable fire
That burns,
Promethean.


Details | Free verse | |

Tongue

Words trembling

At the sticky tilt
Wanting to leap off.


Will you

Help me

Tease

It out

To roll the R's -- To swirl the tongue
To purse the lips -- To spill the beans

No truth potion, no torture
Could make me confess
The sound of night's indigo voice
And what it whispered.


In your soul mirror
I saw

All that you possessed--
The songs of a thousand kingfishers
Shimmering intangible colours
And my lute that you took away
Pledging infinity in return.


I see its point
When it holds back

Pink eyeless screaming worm
Blindly trashing
Rolling back
Imprisoning itself

A muggy cave of beginnings. Here, I
Stick out my neck, unstick those words.

Put your tongue
Where it belongs

You know where--


Deeper.

Probe for me

Among the distilled
molecules of my

Fragmented self.


Stifle my cries
O prying mouth. Seek
The lyrical secret.

Crush my words
Winged monsters

I want to speak
With my wounds.


Details | Free verse | |

Sky and . . .

From up here, far above

I’d hoped for a sense of her
running

fingers across stuttering eyelids of regret

     gasping ribbons of breath, stuck lips to teeth of
bald tires on suicide turns . . .
	short fingernails finding purchase
	    only
in Faith.

	Her heart keeping time, marking mine
hardly disturbing enmity between smooth pebbles and
the texture of his words on her exposed
sensibility
      as to the way of distant love . . . and
she sighs.  as a perfect fit tightens
with the brighter light of
		passing.time.

But from up here,
    her feet followed . . . in worn out flipflops
the way of his endearments
	ruffled skirt playing about pretty calves
as she
   sang out-of-tune of a blue and windy day
in chill mountain clarity

	But then
she looked up at me
wearing earrings from the sky . . . in colours
	to match her eyes . . .
as
she
     threw back her head
           
a.n.d.

             laughed


Details | Free verse | |

I Messed Up

Lord, please forgive me.
I need You.
I messed up.
Please, save me.
Thank You.
I trust You.
I love You.
I am a hypocrite.
Please, change me.
Thank You.
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

Too little, too late

I know it's too little. 
I know I'm too late...
I guess I expected time to stop...
For time to just wait...

It's over...
You needed me and where was I...?
When you lay dying in bed.?
Too caught up in my head...

These flowers on your grave mean nothing...
The tears I cry are pointless...
It's too little...
Too late... 

I should have been there til the end.
Shoulda, woulda, coulda...

It doesn't mean anything now...
Too little.
Too late.


Details | Free verse | |

Darling

Darling…my dear…
I’ve held this in for so many years…think back to the good old days 
when we were young… forgive me for that day…
for burying you in the sand on that cold September day…


Details | Free verse | |

Flying out:Transitions


I know that's how death will come,
Suddenly flying into another orbit
when you are photographing flowers.
It's not a gentle transition.
No-one will know where you've gone.
One step wrong and you're.
off the high wire
And plunging into the no safety net.
Flying for a while;
Jumping into hyperspace,spinning electrons
Startle your grey eyes.
Transiting the new black sun
You're on a double gold helix,
Spider on your web,
Knitting furiously
Into the future heaven on gossamer wings.
Butterfly goodbye,I'm off to see the stars.
And the black holes.Noone will come with me.
I'm shaking off,evaporating into mist.
I'm a flying saucer on a circus mission.
I can't say no to a new invitation.
Make it fast and break with tradition.
Time is passing smoothly till that break
In the music,I've been transmuted into a different key
someone else will play me on their violin
I'm a tune,
I'm a thought,
I'm a whisper in your vision.
Goodbye,darling.I'm under orders
Ready to leave for my performance
On the electric carpet.
Death dancing to a tune on a violoncello,
Arpeggionne sonata
i'm playing your words upside down
In a new foreign translation,
Accompanied by solo artists,ice cracking
I'm going in.It's too sudden.
I'm flying.
Spinning faster to amuse the clowns,
too many ups and no downs.
I'm going right out of orbit
I've broken the pull of gravity,
And fly with pure equanimity
Into my future life,
I'm off at some moment,
An instant ,a crack,a loud smack.
That was me passing.


Details | Free verse | |

My Child

Alone in my house
Which is falling down around me
Walls leaning
Roof sagging
Foundation crumbling

I sit in the living room
And stare at the brokenness
Of my house, my life
As it crashes down
Around me

Then I hear
A knock at my door
I get up
"Who's there?" I ask
"It is Me"

"What do You want?"
"To help you" He says

"I don't need Your help,
Please go away
I can fix this on my own
It's not as bad as it looks
Nothing really."

We stand at the door
Looking at each other
I see compassion in His eyes
And I knew
He saw through my lies

"Haven't I left you
Alone all these years
And let you build this
Life, this house
On your own doing?"

He speaks the truth
His words cut deep
All I've made
On my own 
Is nothing

"Let Me help you." He says
"Trust Me"
He smiles at me
I move aside
And let Him in

In He comes
And goes to work

Repairing with love
And mercy and grace
Making my life, my house
A beautiful place
Beyond what I could ever do

"My work here is done"
He says and gives me a hug
"My child,
I'm always here for you
No matter what, I am here."


Details | Free verse | |

The Trial of the Brazen Boy

Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Who knows not what good to do
You forget your manners
Respectful to none but those with a gun
And thus having broken all the rules
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Who in spite of a good mother’s love
Shows no kindness, sympathy, nor compassion
You follow not the Golden Rule she taught
But seek only ill-gotten crimes of passion
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Thy callused heart strings untuned
What innocence is left with in your breast
What values have you for those that adored you
Having their hope replaced by your dope
Is this the life you envisioned
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Your once good name now vulgar
Your pants hang low so your butt can show
And you believe it’s sexy
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy 
Death and violence amidst your comrades 
Will bring about your destruction 
Thy family of gang which kill, cheat, and steal
You lay still in a red pool of clay as they mock you
Inconsiderate Brazen Boy
Stand before thy creator
For your life for right you tossed for the left
Only now do you weep for the Savior


Details | Free verse | |

A Hushed Prayer

I beg for your forbearance
For I have disregarded my faith towards You
I beg for your healing in advance
For I have disclaimed Your protection and now I’m blue

Do you notice that I’m blanketed in deep distress?
My pillow is soaked externally with unsettling tears
My good memories that bestowed hopefulness
Has been meddled with for years
Has been mistreated and replaced by insecure dreadfulness
I need shelter from the tide of despairs and fears

I’m shattered and I’m seeking Your helping hand
Receive my hushed prayer…from your throne in heaven
I’m begging for Your contentment that’s beyond grand
Receive my muffled prayer… or I’ll be stuck in this tarnished den

Do you notice that I’m spinning mad in the rivers of mystifying visions?
My unwavering boat sinks drastically with damaged gears
My bad memories that departed from my missions
Has been discarding the carefree years
Has been neglected and torn apart by dishonorable decisions
I need Your love to embrace me with jubilation and cheers
I beseech for Your mercy
For I have abused my steadfast hope towards You
I look forward to Your infinite Kingdom favorably
For I have admired Your blessings and now my dreams come true!
In Jesus’s name,

AMEN! 


Details | Free verse | |

Razor Blade State of Mind

I'm in a razor blade state of mind,
A place of darkness that's hard to find.

I sleep tangled in a blanket of pain,
On a mattress full of mayhem.
The darkness surrounds me
And there's nothing I can do. 
My past has become the lightning rod,
The only means by which my future
Can seem to conduct itself.
But who do I think I'm fooling;
What's an orchestra without a conductor? 

I once sang out loud,
But now I'm drowned.
The body electric left
Somewhere in a field,
Where it ceases to breathe.
We have no hope here,
We have no hope left. 

My mind is like my verse;
Jumbled and pointlessly poignant,
Hopelessly optimistic.
Scarred and scared and sacred,
It means so much nothing
That it's bound to mean something.

I am everything I despise,
Nothing that I admire;
I am sweat and I transpire,
Not so wet like fire. 
I'm in a razor blade state of mind,
I tell the truth but I'm a liar.


Details | Free verse | |

Rebellious

                                        What???...

To get someone to read my poems… Contests there must be.
They must be bleeping nuts thinking I can follow all those cockeyed rules.
Out of a zillion types of poems they always pick the weirdest ones.
Allowed only 16 lines… I found I stopped at ninety-one.
And for a topic they want a bird throwing glitter from a tree.
How about I spank them as I put them across my knee!!!
And why must I name it… as they told me? Where’s that for creativity?
Then they want a special comment added in the poem…
I would rather not add plagiarism… I’d rather call it my own.
But, you know, I am so very needy that I’ll do whatever they want.
Well… I’ll do, maybe one or two… of the things they want.
I know this makes it harder to judge the poems that are found therein.
But to me a poem… is a funny bent on my crazy whim.
Then suddenly, Lord Have Mercy… my poem didn’t win.
But I’m happy as punch for even with their strained smile…
I’m sure they read one of my poems yet again. :)

(Meant only for fun) I'm not really complaining. Just having fun.


Details | Free verse | |

Loss Time

Your unwavering stance
 Occupied a barren region,
 Lingering there like a withering flower
 Before you ultimately departed;
 I suffered beforehand –
Missing our laughs, and talks,
 And trips to new places -
I endured your scarcity,
 I mourn we loss the time
 To conquer our declining bonds
 Previous to your leaving, and you
 Finding a new dwelling place,
 Somewhere I cannot visit – presently;
 The ever unfathomable crevice
 Between us -
Befalls a mystery to me,
 I meditate upon the why.
 What threw us into that chasm?
 Our not holding each other dear,
 Dropping us into that never ending abyss -
I assumed it would pass with the rain,
 Then we would have another day,
 Another laugh, another talk, one more hug.
 It never came to pass -
With great sadness –
Tears grasp around my throat, my mind, my heart.
 I shake my head and I say, “Not”.
It is a battle I fight each night,
 How I wish it naught!!
 My peace I fight to keep;
 And yet, I cry every night. 


Details | Free verse | |

My Apology

There are people
That I want to apologize to
I have said offensive words
And told painful truths about
I shouldn’t judge like this
And cause hurt in the inside
No matter what was done
It’s not worth the pain within
I want to retract the words
And to give them kind remarks
I desire to be loving and caring
So I must ask for forgiveness
For the crass words said
I apologize for the pain

Russell Sivey


Details | Free verse | |

What i think of love

The sun in my eyes is like the feeling in my mind. Buring and frying space and time.
Im lost now dont think i can go ever go back to trying to love anyone. I loved her with every part of my being and i can honestly say i gave her everything. And after 2 years of struggle she left me alone. I was the only one around for her for 2 years and now im nothing? Just text me and then never see me again. After two years! I see how its gonna be. But thats over now and im back. No time for love only time to come an go. I know thats low but some times you just have to party and let everything go away. Wake up in the morning not knowing what happened last night. I cant say i dont like that. Im an adventurer at heart and thats what i do. Try to experience everything while im young and have time for the fun. Whats wrong with that? Not a damn thing in my eyes. I tryed to love one to many times. Mom left me at five years of age. Then big sister and little sister went to. You cant trust love becuase in the end. Everyone leaves. Eventually. Time will passd and they will die or they will just walk away. Leaving you alone and confused with no morals like me. Now i blast this music and put my pain on this screen for others to read. Ive done some things. Bad things that i will burn for but in the end.
I wont regret a damn thing.


Details | Free verse | |

The World Needs You, Lord

The world needs You, Lord;
We all need You too.
Alone, we battle and fall apart,
But we live joyful freedom with You:
Created anew in Your perfect image;
Saved,
Loved,
Changed,
In Your Holy Name!
We pray,
Amen!


Details | Free verse | |

Daddy, set me free

Help me break bread at this table
Songs of my captivity
And in those four lines you’re learning to set me free
Where did you put the rope and muzzle
Where is it now?
Should I count it all with you?
Should I give up the stamp I’ve left on your memory?

But you know me
And that’s the impact
A rare understanding
that I couldn’t find the words to give them
But you knew, my captor read me
And I find these things in old words 
Written in digital poetry
The void is no longer a mystery
I’m missing the essence of you
The understanding of our knowing laughter
Our observations that gave us air
To puff up our own thrones

And I, the spitting image of my disappointment
am left here empty
Bewildered, because it’s been made so that I need you
How would I love after you?
It was with you that I felt the ricochets of my affection
The heaviness of wanted blessings on your behalf
And I saw your faith waiver
And now they see me crack 
Because from where I’m running
is where I need to go back


Details | Free verse | |

You're Weeping Me Insane

Stop this bitter weeping
Yeah I’m talking to you
Though you may not be crying aloud 
Your expression gives you away

Stop this careless weeping
Yeah I’m embarrassing you
Though you may not think we know
It’s been in front of us from the beginning

Stop this despairing weeping
Yeah I feel your pain
Though you may feel like you’re the only one
Countless more will empathize

Telling you to stop 
Is like telling the persistent priest to stop preaching
Telling you to stop
Is like telling the earth to stop spinning
Telling you to stop
Is like telling the weeping willow to stop weeping
Telling you to stop
Is like telling the fire to stop burning

I know your crying
But that won’t stop the weeping
I know I’m embarrassing you
But that won’t stop the weeping
I feel your pain
But that won’t stop the weeping

I’m going insane!
Will you cease the weeping?


Details | Free verse | |

True Meaning of Easter Time--and Day

Easter Time... and day... 
This is shown in many ways
Some celebrate it... by an Easter bunny
Tis funny 
How the world man-made... 
To distract Our Lord's Day

True meaning of Easter Time and Day
Tis God made a way... For all of Us to be Saved

Tis the day.. Our Lord and Savior
Was Crucified.. On the Cross
Nails driven in both hands and feet
Blood dripped down.. From thorns of a crown
That the soldiers placed on His head
They killed Our Lord.. Sword threw His side
Yes.. Our Precious Lord.. Jesus died.. 

Then the Earth Shook
Moment Jesus took
All our sins-suffering- disease -pain-away
Then three days
Our Beautiful Savior Raised
Jesus Our Divine Christ
Raised up from the dead
Save Our Souls... giving Eternal Life

Resurrected... for us to become redeemed from our sins
We have the opportunity to become Born-again
All God asks... of us is to believe 
What His Only Begotten Son... had done
To whomsoever believes shall not perish 
But have Everlasting Life
With Our Savior Jesus Christ
Live in Eternity... Forever

As we know... this world shall pass away
But Our Savior Shall Live on Forever

The ways of this world
Don't want anyone to know
The Truth... in Easter Time... Day... 
For Tis then those whom has eyes to see
Hearts to believe... 
Shall become saved... Born-again
Their Souls then... Live Eternally with Him
Jesus Christ... Our Divine King

Come to Jesus
While there is still time

God Bless... May God Forgive me
For I myself am a sinner... 
We all are sinners and come short of Glory of God

Love always yours in Christ 


Details | Free verse | |

The Art of Forgetting

The art of forgetting is the art of remembering For what you are thinking now is something you’re learning new And when you just remember that you forgot something You’re not just forgetting You are remembering at the right time The art of forgetting is the art of forgiving The art of remembering is the art of knowing For when you just remember You are remembering that you know The art within knowing is to know and forgive Florence McMillian (Flo)


Details | Free verse | |

I Wish

I wish I could take back the words that sliced through you like a dagger's blade. I wish I could 
take back the mean slashes of verbal whips that have cut across you heart. I wish I could take 
back the bruises of the negative punches that have made you fall. I wish I was able to pick you 
up, dusk you off and forget it all ever happened. But I can't and I hope you forgive me for not 
being perfect


Details | Free verse | |

THE PRODIGAL CHILD

THE 
PRODIGAL 
CHILD

My 
life 
He 
has 
in 
His 
hand
Creatively 
He 
molded 
me 
with 
sand
Into 
my 
nostrils 
He 
breathe
The 
breath 
of 
life.

Disobedience 
I 
practiced
The 
forbidden 
fruit 
I 
ate
On 
the 
oath 
of 
sin 
I 
traveled 
Neglecting 
my 
creator.

Several 
times 
back 
I 
went
To 
my 
creator, 
pleading
Pleading 
for 
forgiveness
Mercifully, 
He 
forgives.

Back 
to 
the 
sinful 
world 
I 
went
A 
prodigal 
child 
I 
am
Living 
a 
pleasurable 
life
Filed 
with 
sin
Yet, 
when 
remorseful
Back 
to 
Him 
I 
went
Pleading.

Merciful 
father, 
I’m 
sorry
I 
cry 
with 
sorrow
Knowing 
that 
He 
hates 
sin
Irritating 
I 
am 
to 
Him
Yet, 
He 
washes 
away 
my 
sin
With 
His 
precious 
blood
I 
become 
His 
once 
again
Privileged 
to 
have 
Jesus.


Eyitayo 
Lizzy

Motif: 
Spiritual


Details | Free verse | |

Sins of a sinner defeated

I am not perfect
I am guilty
vanity, greed,lust,jealousy
explicit and manic behavior
welcoming anyone and anything into my body
my temple
allowing myself to be ravaged
rebelling against myself
impure thoughts
carnal actions
my being becoming wicked and tainted
my soul was set ablaze by sin
but the fire set about an abundance of light
shinning through...rays of clear sight and sanity
I could see the path of goodness
that I didnt have to hide myself or be ashamed
just when the the fire was extinguished
and only ashes remain
a pheonix arose
taking me on a journey
higher than I've ever been 
and on the wings of the pheonix I to am born again
exonerated and forgiven




Details | Free verse | |

You Are Alive

You're alive even in the darkest place;
Even when we can't hear Your Name,
Even when we can't see Your grace,
You're alive!
Even when we can't feel Your grace,
You are alive!


Details | Free verse | |

A Genesis mimesis Part 1

the Poet maker said and it was so let there be prose forward turns the page       										        	 ancient song from light to breath it was good to divide light from dark    											     	 to recite the day the night the verse of the day expands the page  												visible words separate the waterways waters above held in Heaven's store                                  									evening and morning end of page two Below turning droplets collect for the seas            										it was so land appeared a birth of earth let it bring forth the grass the herb  												 full with seed of life after His kind the tree progeny with life within it was good also               ends page three Sowing the lights midst the heaven the sign of the times standard          let it be dividing rule the greater for day lesser for night He made the stars also giving light seen upon earth agreeing evening morning still good fourth page Poet's words flow optimistically like water seas fill abundantly with the living word sky filled flocks of winged fruitfully multiply for God said let them be blessed evening and morning of the fifth page  The kines after His kind the things that crept with the pen of the ready writer man in His image with this breath


Details | Free verse | |

Regrets

Regrets

Antagonisms perceived
Leave us aggrieved
Hearts broken
Tender spirits token

Words miss-read
Actions miss-lead
Clamors in the night
Pleading miss-sight

Sides taken
Lines shaken
Blindness bodes
Heavier loads

Rashness steps
Action’s regrets
Unthinking eyes
When misery cries

Matters adrift
Sieve and sift
Love enduring
Pardons ensuing

Antagonisms perceived
Leave us aggrieved
Hearts broken
Tender spirits token


Details | Free verse | |

A Chance Meeting

A Chance Meeting

A mischievous smile
And daring eyes
We met in the prime
Of our intricate lives

A gentle, touching caress
Inflamed our needs and desires
A complex, intrepid dance
Our hearts devised

Both afraid to surrender our hearts
Tripping on our past endeavors
We dared to love without restraint
Only to be caught in our own constraints

And so, we parted that night
With a hollow promise of future delight
Both living our lives apart
As we have, lonely, from the start

Regretting nothing for taking a chance
Our lives & souls truly enhanced.

rlm
08/21/08


Details | Free verse | |

An Auntie's Duties

Moms and Dads are important in a child’s life.
I love kids but they are not what I see for me at the moment.
I have the love of many children 
Who all receive the love that my own would.
Hugs, Kisses, Care and Treats.
Their smiles keep me on my feet.
An auntie’s duties are never done.
From the headaches to the fun.
I wasn’t only blessed with the life of one.
More like the mighty group of five in my life.
From when they were born they are all I could see.
The love that they give is enough for me.
One girl and four boys is quite a challenge
But not for an auntie like me 
Because I got the power.


Details | Free verse | |

Three Little Lines

It wasn’t much really
Just three little lines
Wishing me well
And a happy holiday
And God’s blessings

Nothing romantic
Nothing ecstatic
Nothing nostalgic

But to me….
To my longing heart
Those three little lines
Spoke volumes
Of a friendship renewed
A hurt forgiven
A wound healed
A chance taken
To believe again
That in the end
Love does conquer all.

Three little lines….
But what a BIG impact
On this little heart of mine!


Details | Free verse | |

John Crow

It hovers around
waiting in the air
perfect time to land
to salvage
Keen sense of smell
I can't detect
but I know where
it wants to go
The night a friend
to an enemy
snuffed him away
an innocent
Sad....
the owner regains
soil becomes the keeper
of the body
 the soul...in the heart
It flies away
 the sweet fragrance gone.



Details | Free verse | |

Sliding Down

I’m hoping for my dreams to become a reality
I’m hoping for a phase of gratitude
I’m rejecting my hopeless fate
I’m accepting your side of the story…but don’t intrude 

Unexpectedly, I believe in love in first sight
I grab the rope for extra support
It burns like a vertical line of fire
I’m unable to climb, but I seem too far from my desire 

I’m sliding down the rope, hanging from heaven 
They’re distraught by my absence
They’re cheering for me from down below
I’m sliding down… 

I cherish you like my own belongings
I designed you on my bedroom wall
I have you displayed deep in my heart
Believe me – you’ll never split it apart 

Every day I long for your touch – you changed my life around
My heart is blazing like the zealous sun…I prize my freedom and progress
The world is spinning endlessly as I kneel upon my knees 
And I imagine the memories we share with each other 

I’m sliding down the rope, hanging from heaven 
They’re distraught by my absence
They’re cheering for me from down below
I’m sliding down…

When I reflect upon the joyous times,
My heart never fails
To pound vigorously for you
I’m sliding down 
I’m looking forward to spending the rest of my life with you 

I see the light in your eyes
I don’t see an insidious nature in you…
I wish I hadn't believed in the lies
I never felt like a hopeless victim until I gave in to the darkness 

I’m sliding down the rope, hanging from heaven 
They’re distraught by my absence
They’re cheering for me from down below
I’m sliding down…

I’m glad I've met you in the first place
We’re a perfect match – 
Don’t deny it…you made me feel handsome
We’re on the road of victory
We’re making great progress
We’re hanging on the edge,
But we were rescued 
From sliding down…

At least we’re kept ourselves alive……


Details | Free verse | |

Your end

The truth I cannot swallow
The world full of empty hallow 
Mind spinning, I'm not winning
Confusioun fills the air
Dark thoughts hidden in a lair
Waiting to take hold, take control 
It's only a matter of time, before it fulfills it's role
I wait in anxiety, for I know I'll regret
This darkness, the world will never forget
You just have to let it go, let me grow
Noone else will even know
Promise me you won't let it happen again
I'm sorry for faking my grin 
And I'm sorry for taking yours


Details | Free verse | |

Please Forgive Me For I have Sinned

please forgive me for I have sinned
they've stolen from me and I'm taking revenge

my suffering,my pain, my iniquity
my salvation is drained from my body

if only life could stop, for me I'd cry
for me I'd shed only one drop of a tear

my heart would shatter like a piece of glass
my body would break down like melting ice
only at this time

please forgive me, for I know not what I do
please forgive me, for the broken commitment I made unto you

a single moment, a breaths taken away 
and your gone

still how could I have been so wrong

I look up into the sky, as if itself were my savior
my punisher and my deliverer

punish me for it is deserved and forgive me for the words i served
forgive me, for I know not what I speak

take for granted my mind, my body and soul
deliver me from the cores of destruction
to a path of a story untold

so cold, so unreal
so unspeakable

temptation leads to desire, desire leads to sin
imagine yourself falling in and not being able to swim

my mind was free , my heart was stolen,my body was found,
my soul became a token of creed and evil upon the ground
my senses remain, as i disappear

please forgive me, for I know not how to talk
and forgive me for the bitterness in my silence 
as my soul begins to walk

to a place of everlasting 
to a kind of unknown
to a time of never begins
Please forgive me for I have sinned!


Details | Free verse | |

Afraid to Change to World

I never thought I’d be so afraid
Of change,
and what I’d to to my life,

And others’.

I feel like a revolutionary,
Standing behind the curtains
Afraid to read the speech leading others into battle.

I know they won’t be ready
to hear the cries of pain,
to see the blood of Death itself,
to feel the suffering of hell,
for all the wrong that they have done.

Like the sinner man, 
Afraid to pray
Afraid to be forgiven
Afraid to make another mistake
To dirty his newly cleaned soul

Afraid to change the world
Afraid to make it dark and full of pain
Afraid to change it for the worse.


Collab Poem with Kiki Murdock. (:


Details | Free verse | |

The Awakening of the Spiritual Renaissance

Every time I look in the mirror I see the face of god.
What a vicarious view of vanity. My eyes sin and 
Reflect past.  My envious tongue licks the gluttonous,
 glory of gratuitous teeth for the over consumption of snakes.
 Their scales as smooth as one thousand 
Fingernails attached to greedy hands scraping my
Spine in a form of lust so violent even the wrath in my
Heart can feel the aching from the foreplay, from the night before.

Slothfully smoke fills my crying lungs. I breathe, in this
Air soaked in darkness and everything I aspire 
To be but won't. My feet are anvils. 
My back is the ocean always moving to the shore. 
My hands are hammers and my dreams...
My Dreams are like Marshmallows plucked
From that squishy spot in side my skull; maintaining form but no substance.
This face of god looks back at me and sings. 
"You see, you see what can't be seen. You repair the damage
done to me." With a smack of fate and a wrist watch
on my side damage dealt and a battle won. My eyes forgive
their sins. And I scream for forgiveness... forgiveness, without
anger. Forgiveness without regret, forgiveness, without time and
time my friend is  just a clock Ticking, ticking, ticking.

So if this face of god is really the man upstairs his either
a freaking moron or has a really good sense of humor. 
Because as of right now I feel as though I
should dive in this ocean with the weight of my feet
dragging me to the bottom to see how long it takes to 
feel alive. I've come to realize in my dreams I really do
survive and every breath I take carries me closer
to the day that I arrive in a world that's ready for me
a world that I'm not ready to see.

I still long for a mind of a baby so I can maybe
have a conversation with myself and say "self...
you're going to be ok." Because right now 
I'm so confused by the time and space
and everything in between. 
My dreams explode like they
where put in a microwave on high.
The anvils shatter and hammers splinter
and I am the center of everything
by everything I mean everything 
and I can make my world that
much better.

It's my choice.
It's my clock.
It's everything that I've become
and everything that I am.
I have room to change
but it's only some.
I have it all or
I have none.
I may not be this
divine presences of purpose
starring back at me. 
Though, I have repaired 
this damage done to me.


Details | Free verse | |

Please Forgive Me (Spanish Lira)

One can have many a friend
Some will just speak without their following through
When, they should stay to the end
Some feel bad for what they do
I’m really sorry I wasn’t there for you

SPANISH LIRA IS A SPANISH FORM OF POETRY :WRITTEN IN 7/11/7/7/11 
SYLLABLES,WITH THE RHYME SCHEME-ab,ab,b.


Details | Free verse | |

You are you, I am me

You are you, I am me
I wonder If I am seen
I hear Life passing into the night, 
like a river passes into the sea

I see That certain cats think,
iam a lying fake that only think of me.
I want To Erase and forget 
what you said to me today.
You are you, I am me.

I pretend That im happy,
 when I'm really not okay.
I feel Lost and shipwrecked, 
 love is far away.
I touch You awkwardly.
I worry If i will be good enough today.
I cry Because you dont believe a word I say.
You are you, I am me.

I understand I dont think of you,
my word always come out carelessly
I say How did things become this way?
I dream That i will awaken from this reality.
I try, And you lash out unexpectedly
I hope To find a way out of this insanity
You are you, and I am  me.
 


Details | Free verse | |

U N B E LI e VE

                            
  U  N~ BE L I(e)VE  


What if I told you to  u n b e l i e v e?
O p e n the doors and let all your t r u t h s leave. 
Take what you think means your good,
dump  it at the curb,
throw it out and tell it NEVER to RETURN!
“Be polite and fair and be honest, too.”
How many times has someone said this to you??!
Now for your convictions about what you think is bad,
behaviors and betrayals, getting  much too mad,
tell them to find some other place to dwell
housing these truths makes my body unwell.
Believing like that leaves me no wiggle room;
no place to smash down without feeling doom.

While we sit and condemn our beacon of light,
for making choices were told are not right,
we also judge others around us for actions they’ve made,
which our limits decide just don’t make the grade.
So maybe set free from this tight little place we can nurture all sides of us, every last face!
Just think about how you’d love if you knew
those dark secrets you hide, are not really you!
Just because you did something we know as BAD
does not mean that this label is all you now have.

What if what is, really is not,
and what we thinks not, is 10 times more than a lot!?
How about deciding, we don’t have to decide, we don’t have to fight
 and we don’t have to hide.
For a moment let’s think of how it would feel
to release the need to know... and just kneel.
Can you release the things you say make you, you?
And embrace the ones you did, but said you never do?
If you can muster the courage to give it a try
you and your self just may see eye to eye.
Your unburdened spirit will thank you in ways you never dreamed true.
Its abundance flows freely, no force or mistakes, just the love that is you.


Details | Free verse | |

Bed Scenes

Did I want a happy ending?

Looking for an answer meant
the careful measurement of every
breath-- yours whilst tangled
up in tubes, and mine, shamed in
suffocation, strangled in guilt.

Words are metered, oh how they
run! And answers require precious time,
so I exhaled a hazy

Yes. (Softly and thusly, the poem begins).

See, I spread myself
too thin, into a buttery vastness, from
the various comings and goings: into earth
to six feet under it, from one hospital to
the next, from this life to the after-
life, from you, back to me, and back
then with hope, back to us.

I was tired.
No, you'd tell me now: I was weak.
Not in the same way as you
were, but "in a much sadder sense".

Hearts, wintry and iced, have been thawed here
in this room. These walls have heard moans of pleasure and pain and ****-
what in between. A fan looks down upon me,
blowing blame, gently, "kindly turn it off", I whispered
to him (I never got his name).

And so.

Fragile
tensions grow
other intentions
touch turns in-
to tender flesh
now tended.
Naked
shoulders
down
down
down
Surrender.
oh
oh ****
oh
oh
oh God
I'm sorry

I'm sorry

I'm sorry

That endless echo felt
sticky with a lack of devotion. So there you lie on
what was to be your death-
bed, and I lie
on mine. Prisoners of sheets:
soft and fluffy and smell of Downy
but no less cold than steel. I knew then
we could never be free. See,

endings are never happy.
And I prayed, for your sake,
that hot towels abound in heaven.


Details | Free verse | |

Im Sorry- to whoever this applies to in my life, read this and please forgive me

I'm sorry for all the wrong i've done you,
I'm sorry I caused you pain.
I wish hadnt started this so we wouldnt be through
I wish i could rewind and stop myself that day.
Do you even understand,
I never wanted to hurt you?
I wish you never took my hand,
I wish I thought it through


Details | Free verse | |

Sorry for the dirty laundry mom and dad part 3

Slide for a second
I know it was tough for you
But see it through my eyes
You had alcohol to ease the pain
I had confusion of the ways of the world
And the terror of this is the way it’s going to be forever
and soo far I was accurate
Look at my life
Small 
Insecure 
Afraid
Watching my loved ones fight
And my dad never came to that occlusion until he was with my step mom
and he was fighting with her
and I broke down in frustration and he said
It’s hard when your loved ones fight

The broken home got worse before it got better
Because after you left
My next memory
Is purple finger print son my neck
from my brother
Monkey see monkey do
And god only knows what stuff I’m blocking out
Maybe nothing
It’s been hard mom
I know life isn’t fair
While life seems to turn up all roses for him
It hasn’t
Look at the accidents surrounding grandpa's estate
And grandma's cancer
And I love you all
And my life has been a terrifying nightmare
I no longer know how to mask or hide with humor

I know it sounds selfish
but sometimes when I call u at 3 in the morning
I need someone to talk to
like when you call me at three in the morning I talk to you
I don't know what to say but I love you
And you will never have to ask for that
I may never know the truth of everything that surround my life of 
Reasons I cant take a compliment
and cry for the world
and lie to my doctors
and mistrust everyone
But Freud says it goes back to the parents
But I always blame me and god
For all the times I prayed and made the wrong prayers
Like he was some genie
and now you’re all paying the price
for the stupidity I possess I’m not getting any better at handling

Anyway laundry day is coming
and I need some clean underwear
So I’m going to do all the things you taught me
And you know what
Dad never taught me how to shave





Details | Free verse | |

Endless

Within these pages, it is written
Of a love that parted, but not lost;
Secrets untold, thoughts unknown,
'Twas True Love, which had bitten.


Details | Free verse | |

Perfect in Betrayal

The Betrayal was planned,
orchestrated with vehement pride,
This undertaking,
Designed,
with evil intentions,
in mind.

Don’t you know how she feels?
Trying so hard to make you feel better for your cruelty,
She cries for your mistakes,
She apologizes when you yell at her.

How long can she do this?
The wind in her face,
Before she falls,
Before she can’t hold on anymore.

You ignore her but she feels the guilt.
The guilt for your selfishness.
Maybe if she grovels before you,
You will love her at last.
You will respect her as an equal.

You are her only peace.
You are her only friend.
You made her cast away all the others.
Your insecurity, 
Lashes out and bruises,
And she cries,
And apologizes.
As you rape her body and spirit.

She sits enfolded,
in her security blanket of thorns,
Of tears,
As you walk away.
If I had one more chance it could be,
Would be different.
I’m sorry for the disease I’ve caused,
As I slipped through your body,
Unresisting and sweet,
I got carried away.

Carried away with more than I could take.
I’m sorry.

What is worth the fight,
And what should you let die,
This hallowed ground, 
Speaks between dimensions,
Beckoning without a sound,

We are not perfect but we are perfect together.


Details | Free verse | |

Releasing Void

Empty
Lost
Vacant in a light-year moment 


This poem is void 
Along with our self-esteem

This yielding emotion needs shine 
Will we ever rise with you in merry delight?
You're not here with us, so I'm hopeless we'll ever do fine  
 
Our hopes shattered and now I have stars without light


Frightful
Confused
Startled by your
Senseless removal
It has been written in approval


These words doesn't exist in your heart  
For our feelings are merely a piece of junk

Do you hear our disjunked plea or are you too focused on your greed? 

You left us broken and envied-- you dried up our family seed! 
We've been trying to nourish our family... but it only drowned us in distressed emotion
But I'll still try to remain true to my devotion 


Frenzied
Jumbled
Bewildered by your action of
Mindless removal 
That has been written by your approval


Are you willing to listen
Or are you going to turn down our voices?

You're always available to come home to apoligize-- we'll heed to your plea
Do you wish to have a void 
Seperating our once jubilent family?
It's very unclear in your pointless decision; the thought of it is too hard to avoid  


Disoriented
Doomed
Disenchanted by your action of
Heartless removal 
That has been agreed by your approval 


Please put a restraining order to the void that shaped  
Nonsensical lines
Please help me with my unstable life, for I haven't escaped
From these appalling signs


Even if you turn down our dissaproval, we'll remain
Faithful
Complete
Strengthened

Are your stars burning with hope?


Details | Free verse | |

Walk With Me

Falling on defy ears, tight behind lose sin The path I walk, look, and mark of wrath of thorns of a great fine, Blood stain it and imprint on dark black sand please wait in till the final tear drop Occupant tent and sure as the tide felted up the Substances like quick sand to the beads of a prayer Like grieve to mark a man of good deeds unlock the lens like a Key to a vision as they come and goes Walk With Me May faith be the keeper and wait of that of harnesses hands Of that of psalms left stifle to straight and hinder up warded Shrine to wisdom to bliss to the dawn of heaven I yawn I look up ward To kin of thought of spirt to knowledge to pass deeds of fatherhood to children to stomp And yield to know of righteous of a path wait for a witness I collect my thoughts Look adjourn to a shooting star carrier out a prayer of just this moment of time and say Walk With Me Knowing I may not be right my brother or nor shall you my brother But sitting side by side there is no other feeling, Breaking bread even is such a sound decision, To wake and dine that Deepings of our bond, We may not be brothers that of relation but that of the spirit of our descendants, I have spoken of my forgiveness knowing of you and of the spirt, all that I ask is Walk With Me


Details | Free verse | |

This fractured heart of mine

This simple embrace oh how
it warms my cold heart.
Yet it fills the emptiness with
confusion.

Will I love- can I love anyone
with such passion as
I once love her.

I want succumb
to this overwhelming and
joyous feeling.
The feeling that maybe just
maybe I can be loved.

But do I deserve to be kissed..
do I deserve to be held..
do I deserve to be loved.

I only wish I knew the
answers to these
questions which haunt me.

I wish I could take back the
heart that no longer belongs
to me.

And if you would
let me I would earn you'r
trust again.

But for now I must
move on if this fractured
heart of mine allows.


Details | Free verse | |

Pandora's Plea

Forever in a day, my heart is slowly fading away. A victim to time i cant hold my tears any longer. Slice my cheeks and burn a hole through my soul. I surrender Scorned by my own follies. Victim of my own misdirection. Let me drown in a calm sea, floating among red poppies. Let me sink. Gently close my eyes, put a flower in their place. A reminder of what they lost in their blindness. Deafened by the screech of your silence, And tormented by the absence of your violence. Hand me a blade, The one to you i gave, in my misguidance. And i will place it along side me, My open grave, a tribute in honor of the memories i have slayed. The friendship i have betrayed, the trust i have mislaid. Watch it decay Tie a bolder to my strength and drop it in the ocean. Wait till i am colder. older. forgotten over and over. Then let the tide regurgitate, return me. Place your pain in the cart and i will carry it on my shoulders. Pull me into your dreams, but only as a bystander. Replace me But don't misplace me Don't forget you misguided me With the feelings that you hide from me The key you handed me Opened the door to my felony. I believed you And sinned unintentionally.


Details | Free verse | |

Your Rose

Love drawn from hate,
Hate drawn from love.
It's all a viscious cycle,
Swirling you above.

The sight of that "rose",
So lovely and pure,
Was more like a cactus,
Look closer to be sure.

More pricks then you can realize,
Former skin than you can know.
Even the water underneath,
Is to little to even show.

The flower set on top,
The glory of it's petals,
Hide the spines beneath,
That wait for those who medal.

Pick it if you wish,
Look for water in it's stem,
But all you'll find is pain,
Over and over again.

Soon you'll see and find,
When you look down at your hands,
The sores and pricks that rest there,
Arn't worth all his demands.

When that day comes,
And you see what he has done,
It will all come to a choice,
You can love or you can run.

You can love the water,
Which you've never seen,
Or you can hate the skin,
For all the scars that it will leave.


Details | Free verse | |

Hunting the zero man

A spoilt photo,a wasted life,
failure as a father,the experiment didn't come off.
So great was my abhorrence at the sight of humanity
that i decided to give her the go-by.
Ladies and gentlemen i introduce you,
the disintegration of my personality.
Brand me with a red-hot iron,iam the killer,
Lynch me ,who will struck the first blow?
Be stunned because iam the zero man.
Fully aware of the danger,iam the cracker man
so don't be soppy.
Sentimentalism is the reason of stupidity
and the end justifies the means.
Nothing ever put me out,no shiver all over my body.
Zero.
I will save my skin once again,believe it or not
and i will do this with fussiness,take it or leave it.

A clenched-fist salute to the dead child in front of my car.

I killed again giving birth to nothing.


Details | Free verse | |

My Soul Mate

My Soul Mate

I love this man with all my heart
even though I've hurt him recently.
We've been through a lot, but we've both
always there for each other no matter what.
The man I love has always cheered
me up when I felt down.

When I hear his voice on the phone,
I feel alive on the inside.
What I love about him is that
although he gets upset at me some times,
he loves me anyways in the end.
I believed that we were soul mates
from the very first time we met.

I will always love you even when
we're both having rough days.
Till death do us part, I will never
stop loving you.
You are everything to me; my heart,
my life, and my soul.


Details | Free verse | |

O Earth, Sweet Earth , Forgive My Follies

O Earth, Sweet Earth, Forgive My Follies



O' earth , earth , sweet earth forgive my follies, 
 ten thousand days of roaming upon thy bosom
 slashing and bruising in wicked deeds;
no foresight in my multitude of transgressions,
 so guilty of grief and pain inflicted
 in ignorance of thy many desperate needs!

Perhaps a vain wish! Yet my spirit still prays
 for a gift, a chance at dearest redemption
 granted , sweet solace merciful in the giving;
soft tunes, singing such kindness in song,
 Nature's elements dancing with tenderness and
 beautiful clouds celebrating all that is living!

Robert Lindley , April 1991

Rewritten from memory. I think fairly close but do know 
it is not 100 percent as originally written 23 years ago.
 I find it hard to do such rewrites because I always seem
 to remember the original version to be much better! 
Perhaps just my engaging in wishful thinking.lol


Details | Free verse | |

Inter States of Being

"What are these people

doing in my living

room?"

 

A querulous, trembling,

serious query

 

furrowed anxious brows

 

fear floods

        his toes –

 

"What are they doing

         here?"

 

The people who weren’t there just

watched him,

arms crossed

motionless

silent

 

They just stood there

 

        and watched him

 

Across the room,

across wide, saddened, tear-drenched miles,

 

A sister

   calls 911

 

from another state

of mind than his

 

He’s afraid of them –

 

She’s afraid for him –

 

                                               Helpless


Details | Free verse | |

Time's Runnin' Out

Time is ticking like a bomb about to blow up into smoke and flame
It alarms me to say this, but how DARE you waste my precious time

Your words could be as sweet as honey or as sour as lime

But I feel like I've been trampled to the ground By grief and gravity... My teeth are wearing off...is there a cavity to be found? Keep me in your memory...
Fulfill me with your graceful glee and vibrant positivity But it ain't no surprise that we all aren't normal and we all are peculiar in our own bizarre ways Sorry to burst your bubble, but haha, yeah...I've been causing mischief and what not I can't face my shattering reality...I can't face the consequences I must face from past downfalls Unless you trade me your ecstasy Abide with me next to sea...and I'll make sure to answer your calls We'll watch the sunset and the gorgeous waterfalls Don't be afraid, baby It's only in your mind...throw your worries out the window and pray for a blessed reality Anxiety is brewing...but you can replace it with last minute hope And I don't have the strength to hold on to the rope Time is ticking like a bomb about to blow up into smoke and flame It's quite alarming to say this, but how DARE you waste my valuable time... Blaming me for your heartless, devious crimes Time is ringing like a church bell chime...it's your time to say goodbye and it's my time to forget your name It's alarming to hear broken records of memory replay in my head...it's almost like committing a wicked crime Time's flippin' like a dime... It's almost crime...


Details | Free verse | |

No Stain

No Stain
Too hard to lift
No shame too great to bear
His blood will cover even yours
Ask Him, if you dare.


Details | Free verse | |

Availing Number 21

Late at night and you don't care
You don't regret. Regret is not part of your shortcomings. 
Not yesterday not in this one moment alone.
A lifetime separated. Taken out of concept. 
I don't remember where and I don't remember when but you thought about me then. 
Not now, no longer now. 
You share no given principle, however you are attached to one forbidden rule. 
Steadily sinking into a constant state of vacuity. 
Thoughts buried deep down, kicking and screaming to be heard.
Desolated by you, I trusted you.
Impatiently growing blind to your charm. 
Self worth is somewhat lacking within your vulnerably shell
You disposed of me so frivolously. 
So free and willing. 

Copyright © Christina Clark


Details | Free verse | |

I am Legion

My name is Legion: for we are many
Legio mihi nomen est, quia multi sumus

You who have the gift of life 
you who have the gift of love
by Gods grace grant me the best of all gifts
the gift of a merciful death

A man might have immortal life and wander 
for all the generations of man till reaching the edge of doomsday
let me find harbour to see again with longing the lives of those who grow old and die
Of those who die

He who knows our thoughts will he not hear our words


Details | Free verse | |

Hurt I Learned

If I seem down,
forgive me.
Frowns I carry around,
live in me.
You may say,
you see right through me.
Your words untrue,
renew me.

The hurt I’ve learned,
brews in me.

If only you could,
re-design me.
Take time rewind,
refine me.

Recreate the mold, 
without lies I’ve told.
Give back, 
the soul I sold.

~JSLambert


Details | Free verse | |

soul speaker

Do I stay 
Do I go
Where will my words flow
From my heart like a river 
But I forget not to drowned 
holding my breath
Wishing for solid ground 
Passion and improv
Are they the key to the soul 
Ever speaking its emotions
but where did the listeners go
A silent theater 
They watch as a crowd 
Never noticing how the set breaks down
A painted body
The soul wears a mask 
With enough wear and tear
It will shatter like glass
Do I go 
Do I stay 
To whome do I pray 
For answers
Retribution
An end to all grief
The questions are almost enough 
To cause my soul to speak 

Note: I felt like writing. I just woke up. I didn't consider anything I just rolled with it. And this is what I got l. Hope you enjoy it and that you each interpret it as you like. I think this what this one is here for. Interpretation. To touch everyone differently. 


Details | Free verse | |

My Dream

Lo, I have laid my hopes on this rare Earth,
that all men will know nothing but love and compassion.
Never to know hate or prejudice,
but forever enveloped in the cloak of freedom and peace.
Never to tread on the life giving ground with boots of war,
but to walk barefoot on the sandy beaches and grassy valleys of the mountains. 
Where happiness springs forth from each person’s heart as pure water from a snowy brook,
and washes away any tears of regret.
To finally build that paradise that we have so longed for,
in our hearts, to be share with the world.
May your anger and hate become love,
your jealousy to happiness
and your fears to knowing.
Never to forget that we are all connected,
and we must work together to bring peace and harmony to our world.


Details | Free verse | |

Lilith

Goddess of storm and dissidence, Lilith
begot by spurious legend and foolish myth
in the dark recesses of pastoral histories
where ancient mysteries
were defiled.

Illegitimate child.

Apollo's seed, by Roman Empire
inquisitional rules inquire, to her whereabouts
seeping fetid doubts, in the bones of the survivors.
Submission required by slave drivers,

And the Elite,
now on Wall Street.
Twenty five generations later,
they still hate her...

Yet,
I see her in me, shadows of malcontent,
when passed by for promotion
and toxic lotion is sold to keep us young.
I hear her forked tongue,
when my voice is ignored again,
when single mothers barely maintain
poverty existence led
as punishment for being
un-wed.

Burkas hide the bruises
and we’ve run out of excuses
why so many women are poor.
Our beloved men are sent to war
for corporate profits made
and taxes paid in blood and tears.

Yes I have fears.

I fear her rolling up through me, if they only knew me
and what I hold back, they would attack,
and mark me feminist bytch,
witch
and un-Christian.

Listen...
I hear her whisper from sister to brother
from father to mother, lover to lover...
I feel her emerging with Pele’s fire,
Aphrodite’s desire and Venus’s lust.
We must,
hear her.

She is part of us, the Mother’s curse,
foist in the never ending thirst for power
and dominance over all.
Eden’s free fall, orchestrated, ill-fated,
out-dated and reciprocated,
by us, still now, somehow.

The sacred dance beckons us in the second rush
of knowing... rivers flowing, ever to sea.
What will be, will be...
lost in the slipstream currents of the paradigm whore
who dares seek safe passage
to our shore.


Details | Free verse | |

Martyrdom of a Jew King

My name is Judas betrayer of God everyone hates me yet thats not as much as I hate myself and everything else until its just a word that cannot be felt I can't be accountable to a single action thats unchangeable I wish you would cast off into a river of ashes and cover your body until the sorrow passes thats what I did to slowly admit I'm no longer the devil you wish to possess I buried my burdens deep in demons of past My sin seems to leave me quick as I forget it for you I've become a dead doll submissive I sold the jew king for a mere thirty silver he then became a martyr who would have figured I guess I delivered the greatest good ever so you may understand why my guilt is light as a feather Judas, you coward backstabber. you dog I acknowledge it all now with a wink and a nod people mean little more than they care for themselves you wouldn't take coin if your family were starved? you won't hear my reason then I won't give you no sense I've already given you more than I ever truly meant more than I'm worth or have had to give Judas, the sinner the liar, the pig Judas the desperate for his family to live Judas, the hero for without him dies his religion


Details | Free verse | |

Cottage Memories

I remember the days when I was young,
Each summer my parents would rent a cottage,
A place away from the busy city,
Usually the cottage would be near a lake,
Supervised and safe to swim,
The handsome lifeguard would be nearby,
We would go swimming in the calm waters,
There was a limit as to how far we could swim,
My parents and I became good swimmers,
We could hear the sound of the birds singing in the morning,
Our cottage was comfortable,
There was a beautiful simplistic kitchen,
Where you could cook your meals,
That reminded me of the pioneers and their simple way of living,
Discovering that all again was such a blessing,
Conversations with neighbours and friends,
A vacation with God's blessing.

Author: Gwen Meyer-Erlach Schutz


Details | Free verse | |

Exposure

Do you judge?
I feel your penetrating eyes
disguised behind
your smile
So you approve...
do you...work your voodoo.
Let me believe
that no other thought 
entered your mind!
What's that? A quiver?
Shiver...my conscience
take flight...
dimensia sets in
I sink into my court
judge me please...
so that my jury would be silenced.


Details | Free verse | |

A Prayer For Healing

Father,
Do not let me be the demon I have created me to be.
I am the product of myself and my negativity.
I trust You.
I love You.
I thank You.
In Your name,
We pray,
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

things i should not have done

There’s a chance i took 
to make you very disappointed 
pretty much disrupted the kindness and tossed the patience 
aside 
a glass under the tap, emptying for something colder i guess 
the tag that i came with did not bear the warning, “Do not remove” 
an admission that some things i do with my freedom, can remove me 
can place me where i make sense to everyone around me 
as long as there’s distance there 
i get it now, fully understood 
the smiles around me as of late are perhaps for a mind perceived as lost 
Or, then again, an email about how i will 
“never. . . be right about peoples’ opinion” 
i have no loss for fear in my heart 
and gain from the strange we grew up in 
opinion is an onion 
so many write about for obvious layers 
i choose to be the farmer 
filling baskets and not worrying about what’s under the skin 
peel that back and try crying again 
like only you could, last time you did something bad


Details | Free verse | |

Forgive, please forget

I lie here looking at the ceiling,
Then I look to your word,
It didn't have much meaning, 
Trusting you is almost absurd
You left me broken promises
I know I'm better off
No more kisses
I need to write you off
I'm a creature of habit
I  know I'm not that tough
I have no heart to be compassionate
You stole it, left it in the rough
I'm Forgetting how your voice sounds
It truly makes me sad
yet still want you around
I still know what we had 
Why'd did you ever leave? 
Why couldn't we have been enough for you?
Now you wallow in sorrow and tell me how you grieve
love isn't for the weak I give the devil his due 
Now you suffer twisting, contorted pain
the worst mistake of your life
takes me back to lovers lane
You really messed up and I'm to alleviate you of your strife?
You think you deserve it?
….
…..
…...
…....
…..I do.


Details | Free verse | |

Buried


PAST MISTAKES .REGRETS,MISUNDERSTANDINGS,
BURIED SIX FEET DEEP.
NO,THERE WERE NO CALLING HOURS OF FLOWERS,
IT WASN'T NECESSARY FOR THE PASTOR TO RENDER A EUOLOGY.

GOING BOLDLY BEFORE THE THRONE PETITIONING JESUS
TO FORGIVE ME OF PREPETRUAL  SINS.
NO LONGER DO I HAVE THE POWER.
I COMPLETELY YIELD AUTHORITY OVER 
TO THE FATHER.......

IN A WATERY GRAVE JESUS  BURIED MY SINS
IN THE SEA OF FORGETFULNESS.......


Details | Free verse | |

Judas The Fallen Angel

I'm not the devil
But I know who he is
He's your alter-ego
And your so oblivious
He's the angry reaction
He's the hate hidden inside
That masked as confidence
That's the devils own foolish pride
I admit it, I lied
For I know he's with me
When everyone disappears
And we debate how things should be
I feel sorry for him
I was also casted out
So I soothe his great evil
And he removes all my doubt
Not the worst thing I've done
We don't hurt no one
They still despise us
I feel like his son
Except there's that thing
Always keeps me true
Peace  and love lead to happiness
The rest is up to you
For we can just show you
The reflection you wear
As we climb back towards heaven
My mind already resides there

And the millions of dream chasers 
awaiting me there
trying to catch up
by acting like they care
yet somehow, I still truly do
my mind is much stronger now
in thanks to you
nobody hates me
when I love myself
their desire can;t touch my
sense of already there
catch up  to me 
if you think can
you might learn the power
when i show you the dance
it will be okay 
when the music takes you away
I'll be holding your hand
at the end of the day
my one truest friend 
always saw the end
before I ever
made a start towards it
the old me is over
and I'm more loved for it.


Details | Free verse | |

How I Long For--

My dreams are falling apart
In Your hands, I pray (for joy), "Take heart!"
You are the stars - searing my 
Soul is kneeling to the ground
Trace my future and take wing
Towards the pathway...You find peace
You are an angel in my--

Heart is bleeding soundlessly
Above land...I mourn so sweet
I am the clouds - carrying a 
Gallon of grief...release me!
Place me in fields of love and
Forgive me and lift me up
You are the heavens to my--

Heart is beating profoundly
Without Your heart's joyous song
You are the sun - nourishing 
My lambs are grazing around,
Roving in fields of splendor,
Enlightening the darkness
You are an apple to my--

Eye is grieving...losing sight
Of Your glory...I feel lost
You are the lake - sparkling with
Delight and Luck! Bring us home!
Grow like a morning glory
In the autumn time, You thrive
You are valuable to my--

Eye is twinkling...praying for 
Insight...yearning for Your sight
You are the hills - guiding my
Mind is longing for your mirth--
Restoring peace to my verse,
Sprouting forth grace and freedom
You are the train tracks, bearing--

My train of thought...making my
Steel spirit connect with Yours
You are the valley - between
The mountains guarding us all,
Building strength to fragile bones,
Welcoming a stream of hope
You are my map - lending me

YOUR helping hand I would take
Now, I could take Your challenge
You are like a maze filled with
Mysteries conceal the truth;
I fight with all of my might
And I BEG for Your mercy
To mend my once blissful dreams!

How I long for Your mercy...


Details | Free verse | |

Lives to Live

We have dreams to fulfill.
We have goals to achieve.
We have hearts to inspire.
We have love to give.
We have faith to teach.
We have hope to send.
We have strength to create.
We have bravery to find.
We have positivity to shine.
We have courage to build.
We have stories to tell.
We have hands to hold.
We have lives to live.
All in Your Heavenly name,
We pray,
Amen.


Details | Free verse | |

Stay By My Side, Angel

Frozen in time for a very long time
Until you twinked my time and scrubbed off the grime
From my heart...from my heart 
It beats in rhythm now...my heart is pumping with joy!
You took heart and tore apart
The blasphemy that molded me into this monster
That pierced me like an arrow...striking a bull's eye
Now I can't shake off the dread, I'm sorry for breaking down in front of you

I just can't function...without your heartfelt blessings 
Hovering around me...lingering by my side

*still working on this poem...the other part got deleted X(*



Details | Free verse | |

Hypocrite

I am a hypocrite and look what I just did:
I fell into my darkest pit; now, again, and again.
I thought that I was strong enough to live the truths I said;
Now I realized I'm much too weak; a fool too ashamed to raise his head.
God, please save me, please forgive me, and please give me strength. 
I love You.
I thank You.
I am forever changed.


Details | Free verse | |

Memories Made

The coldest white had fell
Surrounding all the feet of those behind
The day turned into hours
Just in the mind
Did the gift appear in night?
Or were dreams reality?
Did it come from karma’s hands?
It drifts from sanity

The trek towards that happy place
You’ve been there many times
Something was different now
It held a horrible surprise
The box wasn’t full of life and sound
The ashes of memories made were here
Taking longer to twist the knife
Left remains of a child now in tears

Standing still you couldn’t breath
Excuses flying in your mind
Trying to figure out the scene
Hoping there’s time
You look up to see
Expectant eyes for the last time
You wish you could keep
But it’s the saddest of a smile 


Details | Free verse | |

Miracle

I was in a panic my heart beating rapidly

At the thought of losing it all.

I looked around and what I found

Were angels starting to fall.

 

Warriors from up above

Sent to help the willing,                             

But what they had wasn’t enough;

to stop humanity from killing.

 

For they were corrupt and unjust

In what they have learned

They didn’t realize that all of their sinning;

Was going to get them burned.

 

 Here are all of the angels;

 Working hard to save

These people who just laugh at death

And the gift in which he gave.

 

There was an angel so beautiful,

One I couldn’t see- for there was

A bright white light

Surrounding him and me.

 

He kissed my temple and he whispered

Everything was going to be okay.

I felt the warmth of the message

That he tried to relay.

 

A peace washed over me as I realized;

 I had spoken to God,

I watched the dirty looks and heard the snickers

Of those who found it odd.

 

For in this age it is impossible,

To speak to the creator,

It must have been a demon in disguise

A great impersonator.

 

They were wrong

 I have never had such a great feeling,

Energy passed through me

 And healed the pain I’d been concealing.

 

I will always remember

The day that I had needed

A miracle from up above

My prayers had been heeded.


Details | Free verse | |

An Astronaut

I think I was an astronaut
Aimed for the stars.
They fill me up;
They refuel my tank.
They enable me to believe,
Telling me to never give up
As they follow me all of my days.
If only we could see the beauty
That they truly are.
They shout out dreams
That we can reach so far.
Climb into the rocket
And liftoff!
On a journey to discover ourselves,
We are taught so much more,
Learning our goals are only a plan away.
Even thought we must return,
I know that I will be back.
I am an astronaut,
And we always reach for the stars.


Details | Free verse | |

YOU CHANGED MY WORLD

OK GIRL WHAT YOU TRYING TO DO TO ME,
FROM THE VERY BEGINNING YOU WERE DIGGING ME
CALL ME UP ONE RAINY DAY,ASK ME TO COME OVER AND MAYBE PLAY

NOW YOU WERE THE ONE WHO REALLY CHANGED ME AROUND
TAKING ME TO CLUB JUICE AND SHOWING ME THE TOWN

AT FIRST I WAS YOUR PROJECT,YOUR PROTEGE,YOUR GIRL
YOU TOOK ME AROUND AND OPENED MY WORLD

NOW WE STARTED OUT FRIENDS AS WELL IT SHOULD BE-
ENDED UP LOVERS TO THIS DAY SUPRISES ME

TO TOOK ME TO THE WILD SIDE,BUT NOT ONCE WAS I AFRAID
YOU TOOK ME BY THE HAND,THATS HOW THE FRIENDSHIP WAS MADE

YOU OPENED YOUR HEART,YOUR LOVE,AND YOUR HOME
NEVER ONCE DID YOU SAY JUST LEAVE ME ALONE

IM NOT THE KIND OF GIRL TO KISS AND TELL
BUT BEHIND CLOSE DOORS,YOU TAUGHT ME WELL

NOW YOU WERE MY FIRST,DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
THE RULES OF ENGAGMENT WERENT REALLY EXPLAINED YOU SEE

OVER THE COURSE OF TIME THE INTIACY WAS REALLY SWELL
BUT NOW IT WAS OUR FRIENDSHIP THAT REALLY STARTED TO FAIL

NOW ALL THE WHILE I WOULD SAY "AJ WHY ME"
BECAUSE YOUR BEAUTIFUL,SPECIAL AND CARING YOU SEE

NOW I GREW TO ADMIRE YOU MORE,AND MORE
IT WAS OBVIOUS I LOOKED UP TO YOU,IT WAS YOU I ADORED

ITS YOUR STRENGTH,YOUR CHARACTER,YOUR INTENSE PASSION
QUALITIES THAT ARE APART OF YOU,THAT ARE LIFE EVERLASTING

SO NOW THAT YOU TURNED ME OUT AND TURNED ME ON
RUMOR HAS IT  THAT YOU NOW WANT ME GONE 

IT SEEMS YOU THINK THIS STRAIGHT ARROW IS GAY,
GIRL IM NOT GAY...YOU JUST TURNED ME THIS WAY

DONT YOU REMEMBER LOVE-IM THE ONE WHO'S STRAIGHT
I WANTED TO GO OUT,BUT NOT ON A DATE

BI OR STRAIGHT WHAT DIFFRENCE DOES IT REALLY MAKE
MEETING YOU WAS NEVER EVER A MISTAKE

SO NO THERE'S NO BETTY,JANE,SUE OR SALLY
IT WAS JUST YOU,AND THOSE FEW TRIPS TO CALI

I CERTAINLY DONT WANT TO ALIENATE OR PUSH YOU AWAY
YOU TOLD OTHERS IM"YOUR BEST FRIEND"WAS THAT A MISTAKE
IF I LOST YOUR TRUST,MY HEART WOULD BREAK
YOUR MY CONSTANT TRUE FRIEND IN THIS SIN CITY STATE

REMEMBER THE ADVICE,THE SMART WORDS YOU TOLD ME
DONT TRUST ANYONE ,DONT LET VEGAS MOLD ME

I WISH I COULD BELIVE THE WORDS YOU SAID IN YOUR VERY HOME
LATELY WHEN I CALL ,YOU WONT EVEN PICK UP THE PHONE

AM I SO SAPPY OR SORRY TO THINK YOU WOULD STAY
PERHAPS IVE SAID TOO MUCH,AND YOU WISH I'D GO AWAY

I'LL GIVE YOU YOUR SPACE AND YOU GIVE ME MINE
HOPEFULLY WE CAN FORGIVE EACH OTHER,AND WE'LL DO JUST FINE

  IF I SHOULD DISSAPPEAR,FALL OFF,LEARN A LESSON ONE DAY
WHO WILL REALLY UNDERSTAND THE"INTRIGUE"OF JESSICA
I GUESS YOU WERE JUST DRAWN THIS WAY-


Details | Free verse | |

Lionman, Do What You Can

My dear my dear
You are so special
Your iron will
Becomes hard as metal
Your soft temperament
Could not break an egg
Keep your monsters sealed up
Not allowed to dominate your head

Rome fell down
In what seems like a night
Heaven seems like hell
Except for it light
Except for your might
You are sound as a lion
If no tears are falling
How are you still crying
Inside, your dying inside
Intentions so bleak
They're shadowed by pride
If you can't do no wrong
You always right
Even if you don't realize

Drop the weight of the world
From your burly shoulders
The load you should carry
Should not keel you over
The deeds and the actions
Shall speak for themselves
If you do it alone
You won't ask for help

Mighty lion man 
Feeding on the sheeple
Even if it's steep
Or piercing like a needle
A stare is a snare
And now I'm trapped in it
Like the mighty lion
The sky holds no limit
For the glory I'm storing
For the right day to come
So I may ascend as a lion
Into heaven
With the one
I am to become


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiven

Forgiven sleep
the day crawls with the secrets of night


Details | Free verse | |

The Sun Smiles On Us

When the heart is pure
and lures the ones who
understand. Then we
find the stones at rest.
No longer the shields
are needed. Our job is
done. Lets go foward,
and grow with the sun.


05/13/14  written by, Larry Berdoo
                     ~WRITE ON!~


Details | Free verse | |

The Road

I see you and all I can see is what used to be. I see the happiness, the love, the sadness and the pain. I cannot imagine a future with you now. Is this what has become of us? I made you my whole life. I can’t think of you now without thinking of the pain you caused me. I know that I had fault in the ending of our relationship so I will not put all the blame on you. I guess this is what they mean when they say, “Your love just wasn’t meant to be.” Your life just goes on as mine is at a standstill. You came in and out of my life as if I were anybody better yet a nobody in this world. I am the woman you say you love. The one you say you can’t live without but yet you still go on. I can’t keep doing this to myself. You say you go on so that we could be together but we are going in two separate directions. You are so far gone in your direction that I can’t catch up. If you could only stop for just a minute to turn around and realize that I am no longer there behind you. You came and kept on going down the road you said we would be going on together. I wished you could have stopped. You didn’t give me a chance to say anything not even… goodbye.


Details | Free verse | |

A Stain

Each night she goes to bed in fear
Each night a prayer is prayed
For just one night of peaceful sleep
No visit to come her way
Still every night he enters in
He violates her soul
Abruptly leaves this child in fear
A wounded tattered girl
Until one day she’s had enough
His pain she can take no more
She goes to bed and waits for him
To end her broken world
With one wave she cuts away
The life he lives each day
Now in peace she sleeps each night
And all that’s left
A stain

Each day she prays for freedom
Each day she battles on
The day he promised to love and cherish
The day is now no more
With each day she faces fear
From the man she dearly loves
Leaves her in a battered mess
Scarred to face the world
Then came the day she had enough
The fear she could not take
Aimed a gun while in his sleep
One shot would seal his face
Her life is now free from fear
The world she can enjoy
Now in peace she sleeps each night
And all that’s left
A stain

These stories each are similar
The price each paid was death
Two people lived in daily fear
Now live in happiness
Some say the actions 
Of these ones 
Were drastic steps to take
The bible states 
Thou shalt not kill
But help was just too late
Think back the story
Of the cross
Where Jesus bled and died
He shed his blood 
To save each soul
For us he paid the price
Sounds like the death
Of these ones
At the hands of ones that feared
Was covered by the rugged cross
Where Jesus paid for sin
For God is love 
And each of us
He wants to live in peace
If you doubt 
Go to the cross
And you will find 
A stain


Details | Free verse | |

im sorry

I have come to realise, 
What a coward I've been. 
Overwhelmed by the hype, 
And poverty life, 
That has slowly beaten me down. 
I should have listened. 
And I never should have said those things. 
I'm sorry. 

I was flicking back, 
Through snapshots in my mind, 
Trying to find a time, 
I was happy. 
I was shocked to find, 
At the back of my mind, 
The people I left behind. 
And I'm sorry. 

I became dismissive. 
Fake smiles and frowny face looks, 
Were allies of mine. 
They replaced all of you. 
Your originality and quirks. 
I swapped late night talks, 
For cheap shoes and oodles and noodles.
Leaving the life of fame glory 
For a life of love and poverty  
And I'm sorry. 

I will not leave what I have now
but I want to add you into it.
Call this my second attempt, 
At being a better person. 
But I yearn for happiness, 
And crave affection,
 
Just like I always did. 
This is my confession, 
A chance at redemption, 
And I'm sorry. 

My hypocrisy is a talent. 
I cannot say anything, 
To justify my actions, 
And callous words. 
Blinded by petty drama, 
And fashion disasters. 
Selfish doesn't come close, 
And sorry isn't good enough.


Details | Free verse | |

Breakfast time and a bowl of cereals

Waking with a start,preparing to face the end
eating next to nothing,cracking the bottle of optimism.
Life looked away in revulsion as the villainies committed
and lost into the book of vanity.
With the naked eye i see the world every morning,revolutionized
but big words puff me up as thought i was you.
A jarring note,a shot of morphine and get out of the rut
a perjury of illusion,the only blemish on your face.
I was deceived into the belief of something invisible.
Swashbucklers,mock heroics,phony patriots and cells
that proliferate so rapidly.
Populous mash potatoes,the decomposition of the corpse,
i can't take much more.
Filth has no sense of delicacy,i never boasted that
and the inanity of convenience put a bullet through my head again
So i open the window of pessimism.

We live with the manners of a swine,
enough to keep body and soul together.


Details | Free verse | |

Locks

I’m chopping it off
All of it, you hear?
This long black hair
Down past the middle of my waist
Sleek and shiny with 
Past defects and 
Too many wasted bottles of shampoo
Trying to cleanse myself of my mistakes

It doesn’t work
It doesn’t work

Split ends that rise 
To corrupt my roots
I tame with vials of conditioner
To make the pain easier to run through your fingers

He loves to run
His fingers
Through my 
Softest pain
To twist it around his fingers

Easier to manipulate

He’s using it against me

I can’t lug my history with me
Everywhere I go
Brushing it 
Trying to comb out the exact instant
Of my errors
I relive it everyday
Between each strand of ebony
That entwines it’s soft whisper
Of my grief

I mess up so much
 
I can’t sustain this ideal of beauty
Brushing up against my skin
Soaking into my pores
Filling me up with regret and such a wasted
Desire 
To please
Him

All I ever wanted  was to be beautiful for you, baby

But  I’m chopping it off
All of it, you hear?
This long black hair
Down to here
Letting go of raven haunts, lost loves
Million dollar tears 

Each strand of ebony 
That is lacerated
That cascades to the floor
Gives me liberty
And I let go
because

All I ever wanted was to be beautiful for you, baby


Details | Free verse | |

The Lords people in a Corrupt World

I see the world crumbling around me, people losing their moral ground
Following what they think is right rather than what they truly know is right. 
Most people really are uneducated sheep and cannot see what’s right in front of their faces. 

So many even mock the Lord and his word as if he didn’t exist and even openly say with conviction that theirs no GOD! And instead there small minds worship a sport as if it was their GOD?! 

It really disgusts me and breaks my heart to see how far mankind has gone and I fear for their souls as they do not know what they do. 

Dear Lord please have mercy and help show them the way, its easy for them to be distracted and miss lead with all they hear and are shown in this corrupt world without its true intentions shown.

GOD Bless all the Lords people and hold your heads high as the true fight is yet to happen and when it does . .  We’ll fight until we die!

Amen 


Details | Free verse | |

Emotional Imbalance

My knees get weak-

As you whisper;

Sweet nothings in my ear.

 

I start to shiver

At the words delivered,

Our fate becoming clear.

 

You caress my skin, 

Leaving trails of kisses;

Every place you touch.

 

My breath deepens-

As your mouth meets mine.

The pleasure is getting to be too much.

 

Our passion is apparent.

Our kisses become rhythm.

Our love becomes a song.

 

I could never really fathom,

How these feelings could be;

So wrong.

 

Now I sit and think,

Of how it had to end.

Our closeness is slowly dying.

 

If I said that I could forget about you-

this feeling of being safe;

I know that I would be lying.

 

Every time I see you,

I want to press your body to mine;

I want to hold you tight.

 

I love you-

Even though I know that;

You can't be- 'Mr. Right'.

 

So the struggle continues;

I'll always love you-

Until the end. 

 

It kills me to know...

 that you can't think of me;

as nothing but a friend.


Details | Free verse | |

Beyond the Veil of Death

A tear stained cheek
caressing the charred body.
No registering the stench
A love so true
It sees him through
beyond the veils of death.

He sees her golden hair
flowing in the breeze
Slender hands, ring adorned
blowing kisses in the wind.

Rosy lips
singing a tune
A slender body
twirling to the song
The tapping of her feet
Graceful arms
embracing him
in everlasting love.

Bold green eyes
filled with defiance
Standing against
 the flames.
No fear, no regret.
Only a sad smile
Last words whispered 
against the flames.

Forgive them 
for they know not
what they
have done.


Details | Free verse | |

Gentle as the moon

Who is this?
That calls me from my latent apathy.
Why is this good?
rescuing heart from lovers atrophy.

My desperate mewling 
reached further than a shout.
Stumbling toe scraping limp
took me further, packed more clout.

I was lied to.
Thinking that you're bottomless ration,
could be earned,
could be bought with acts of compassion.

I was indulging in hurt,
abiding in poetic romantic pain.
I was thrashing around
bellowing at nothing,
needing to blame.


Why is this love for me?
when I was wasting all my energy
on a treadmill run.
Who is this?
That holds me light;
gentle as the moon,
source of the sun.


Details | Free verse | |

Visible Breath

Autumn comes I stand watching the leaves..thinking
The breath leaves my body unseen
But as the mercury drops and as I ponder my place.
I notice all I think all I feel.
Right there on the window before me.
To others it's just a mist caused by cooling or heating or both.
A chilhood whimsical game"oh boy look it's cold"
To me that mist is all, your name , your face, Our time.
I want to wipe it away this physical aberation of all unseen in my heart.
I see it all the pain the love the heartache everything in a small whitish cloud on a simple window.
My hand reaches pauses  oh so this is what you look like.
Oh if it was so easy to be done.
The mist fades rapidly with every lonely wasted breath. Making an apperance oh so briefly.
What ever course I take to wipe away or to gently touch the mist.
Would this breath on the window which taunts me so relay back to my damaged soul see its gone you'll be ok now or see how it welcomes your touch?
welcome to the world for all to see.
Hidden by the sun most of the time.
My fingers glide through the vanishing mist, I flash back to your cheek beneath my fingers.
Goodbye my love, goodbye my pain, goodbye to the only proof I have left of you.
But at peace I am.
I know now what I did not before.
Your not invisable your their in my breath.
Kissing the crisp Autumn air with me.
And all I have to do is breath.
And my visible breath will show me all I feel is real as real as the mist on the window


Details | Free verse | |

Legal Tender of Getting Old

Legal Tender of Getting Old 

If tears were coins I'd be a rich man… 
If sadness was time I'd live forever… 
If I only knew what to do to make it better… 
I would do it in a heartbeat. 


But, no answers are easy when feelings crash around you… 
And the Sun does not shine in the heavens above… 
if only I could see…if only I could find a way…if only I knew… 
How do you say goodbye when there is no love? 


To only be me myself alone … again… 
decisions are frightening and shaky to behold… 
But change is needed for me to stay sane… 
all the while we continue to grow old. 



RLM 
'05


Details | Free verse | |

The downward spiral

The downward spiral

On the edge.
Leaning towards the deep end
The dark waters with their mystery
Seem to beckon you and your misery
Talking like its cold embrace will warm you
It is asking for your life and to guide you.
Leaning forward into the abyss
The wind past your ears seem to hiss
Your fly and you soar
For a time that makes you wish you had more
Though the feeling cannot last
If you keep thinking of what people said in your past
The water boils from your unleashed rage
Only stirring the whirlwind of pain and hate
As you claw at the blackness surrounding you
In the tormenting fury that you cannot bare
You wish to scream in your anger 
Yet your voice seems to just whimper
drowned without air
As you are over come with despair.
The lack of life in this moment makes you weep
All you want to do is sleep
But then you think.
What about the ones I will make weep?
Maybe it’s not all that it seems
Maybe someone is waiting just for me
To wake them from their dreams
The nightmare that they cannot break free 
The one they are waiting in just for me.
I want it all to stop
I really want to quit
But I know the person is waiting for a hero
And this hero is me.
I must get out.
Out of this dream
I need to wake and help the one beckoning me
I say sorry to this black water
Then flail in its grip
Trying to escape its unholy embrace.
My breath escapes from my lungs
And my mind screams in pain.
But then the darkness evaporates.
Leaving me to start anew 
Like a phoenix rising from its own dark ashes.
I look at the world I thought I knew
Awake and breathing
I arise from my room
A new view on life.....
I look in a mirror
Then I see what I want to be
The glass shatters
Setting me free.
I will change the world 
And all that has hurt.
I will not let the one waiting for me down
I will find him or her and turn their life around.
I won’t let this world drown 
I won’t let others follow their spiral to the ground
Because I’ve already been to the bottom
 I know what it’s like to hit the ground
Then lose all you have had
But now is my chance to turn it all around
Ill carry you up that spiral with not a look down
I’ll help you rebuild your world again
Then stay with you until our end
Now no one will fear the spiral again
Because they will always have a friend.


Details | Free verse | |

Thoughts of Holidays

Why does my soul ache this time of year
hoarfrost on brown grass/icy chill in the air
feeling all should be calm yet filled with tumult. 

Why are ghosts of Christmas’ past
still haunting when joy was always shattered
by demon rum/angry words  
ripped a child’s flesh/soul
unaware it would haunt for decades.

Is it wrong to love And hate
want/shun/pull/push? 
Great pains and sorrow masked in 
childhood joy/laughter.
Leave me please leave the child who is within me …

Let him grow to be a man 
without guilt and sorrow 
over nothing he could control nor want to. 
I cry out to my maker 
how good he is yet … 

how i still am pained by anger within; 
is it the demon or the man, 
is it self-pity or imagination … 
Fantasy or reality 
children play in the distance on loan 

just a while/no pain should touch them 
or entice them the world should
be alive for them 
to explore with no bandits
awaiting them as prey. 

Why is it so 
what is my role in this
world/ 
guide
messenger? 

In what sense do I … 
change them/ 
to what extent will i 
become a part of them 
do they want to caress or shun 

Emulate or emaciate 
oh hear my cry great father 
what is my place and where does it fit? 

Thy will be done …


Details | Free verse | |

Have You Met Your End

I'm scared...
I'm not prepared...
to meet my end... 
to drift into the river's bend...

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die
If I stay on ground or fly 
I see my end...unwind...unwind...and it makes me blind...
The tears that are clogging up my eyes
They’re feeding me lies…and the thoughts whisper cries
I'm treasure...never to be found
Decaying in the ground
Forever...
I'm sorry...I'd never
Mention suicide again to you...
Don't be blue...though you get the clue

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die
If I stay on ground or fly 
I see my past…unwind…unwind…now, I’m blind 
But I see it in my mind’s eye

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die…
Live or die…
Live or die…
But I’ll try…
To live and make you feel happy
‘Cause I, alone, am feeling needy…
Greedy…shady…

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die…

I’m ready to meet my end…
The waters brew…and my fate blends
In with the gloomy, despairing river's blissful waves
The sky swarms above me…I want to see you
Again…but you’ve met your end

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die…

I STAYED strong…Where do you belong?
Your life ended like a shimmering star
You ended your tune of delight…I can’t hear your song
Repeat it again and again in my ears…
You left me with an everlasting scar

I'm not prepared... 
people start to stare...
people don’t seem to care
If I live or die…
I want to die…just let me fly
And reach to heaven’s height
But, I’d feel guilt and contrite 

I'm not scared (of your absence)... 
people start to stare...(and I feel dense)
people don’t seem to care (I can’t bear)
If I live or die…(the thought of you, I won’t deny…I’m just trying to play fair)

In my heart…
You broke it apart…
It breaks my heart
To see you die and depart

From His light

Have you met your end
Around or near the river's bend? 

Your heart breaks instead of bends
You still have some errands

To run...
You have the ability to run...
Just run...
And don't run off somewhere far away...or I'll consider you officially "gone" 
But, first: get your duties done

And then...we can welcome the sun 
Don't shoot yourself with a gun...
Put it down and run

WITH ME! *smile* 


Details | Free verse | |

Beloved Friend I Have Fallen

An angel, cradles me, in her motherly arms
I have fallen, I am venerable 
I told myself, I would not do this, no more
I have failed to keep my promise, to you
I have not stayed true
Tears flowing, as I smile, just, for you!
Remembering the times, when you cupped my face, in your hands
Your blue eyes, gazing into mine
Telling me with sincerity
‘I am the sunshine, that lights up your world, each day that dawns’
My heart aches, it rains with love, having fond memories of us
Wash me clean, being human, is challenging me!
Emotional bondage, creating blocks
I need to move on, you are dead and buried
Your time here, over
My heart struggling, accepting this reality
“Forgive me”
I pray to be free!
“I Love you, my beloved, friend”


Details | Free verse | |

A mysterious mind

A cluster of thoughts 
twirling in the mists 
whirling in the wind 
the grace of a mind 
can't be missed.
 A fight within 
thoughts of good go dark 
without remorse 
rise upon insanity 
come back  to the world
with intelligence,
that is a mind of elegance.


Details | Free verse | |

Love

Love is...........
God,
in people,
mysterious,
creative,
a choice of heart,
amazing,
truth,
throughout the world,
what God has for us,
powerful,
everlasting,
real.
love is a amazing
power from above
that can only be
taken through the
heart of one that wants
to be changed to have
love for eternity in heaven


Details | Free verse | |

Army of Puppets

 Army of Puppets

Is anybody listening? Is anybody out there, 
Unable to distinguish. Why should I care?

Wallowing into your own self pity
Lining up, to gain a few simple words of empathy.

Firmly taking all the passing slaps.
Breathless, motionless, what’s one more lap?

Enclosed, surround by all that is continuously collapsing.
Rounded by mesmerizing images , we all call a vortex recapitulating.

Endless seems to be the theory,
Why seek more desirous envy?

A world without water, dry as far as one can seek.
Digging, stowed away in the hollowness we feed.

Prior substance, now begins to leak.
Why bother to stay, lets simply leave.


Details | Free verse | |

LIFES TESTS

Fight after fight, challenge after challenge, test after test. 
While were in this life it will never stop, its inevitable, like the sun rising day after day.

I feel weaker with every hit, yet ironically stronger too?

I could be deemed as miserable or always looking at the negative, but without the bad we cannot appreciate the good and pretending everything is okay does not make the bad go away and does not serve any purpose. We must embrace all this life throws at us in ode to grow in body and in mind.

Hit after hit yet I still stand with my head held hi, a presence surrounds me as if it was sent from the sky, my head may be bloody an my body beat an bruised, but something inside me still shines and grows everyday for darkness cannot shine in light but the smallest of lights shines in the darkness. 


Details | Free verse | |

Handshakes with Angels

I flew one time
Over the going ons of this life 
I saw fate's plan
From my conception to my third ex wife
From the dumpster babies to a NorthWestern paradise 
From train traffic delays to buses blowing up in Saudi uh-rayb 
From sending your picture to med schools to 25 cent giving a family food 
From giving profiles an update to gettin profiled and court dates 
From same love and reverse racism 
To double X chromosome unnecessary circumcision 
From society's mutiny to wives being sold and muted on their knees 
From all the pastors receiving enough to breakeven 
and the poor that are rich in faith no matter circumstance nor season 

From rainbows leading you to gold to rainbows meaning the devil has bought your soul
From waterfalls to your teardrops
From catchin crooks to crooked cops 
Opening fire on perps to opening fire on purp
From losing your last dollar to finding your worth 
Over satiating our hunger to babies dying of thirst 
From oil and water 
To closed minds and open legs 
Old autopsies at a young age 
All that lynching but we can't hang
Inherited all your bad genes 
All these heirs but I can't breathe 
Bending the air so it won't fit in your lungs 
Authoritative action leaves you speechless because they'd prefer for 
me and you 
you and I 
to breathe less
But I ain't trying to handshake no angels yet
Not yet


Details | Free verse | |

Silent Murmurs

I have love
and children
and one bicycle too many
and memories,
some happy, some sad;
too many memories
of a girl by my side.

I have faith
and a God
of my not-quite understanding
and I'm seeking a vantage point
where I can see
how the pieces all fit together
as I watch them fall apart.

I have tears
and smiles
and an appreciation
for these silent murmurs
from my soul.


Details | Free verse | |

His FINAL Conduct

Ticking! Tacking!! Tic Tac!!! Time is running, seconds passing by Years going with nothing that counts Greys are showing, almost ready to die Ticking! Tacking!! Tic Tac!!! Flashes of his past, shadows of his future Contents in his heart, wicked like the vulture He wishes to go back, but back is not an option Ticking! Tacking!! Tic Tac!!! The best gift, He is not dead yet To make his pact with GOD, he does first To engrave his name in hearts, he does next Ticking! Tacking!! Tic Tac!!! Time is running, seconds passing by The time is calling, he's ready to die In heaven, he sits with a lovely smile Ticking! Tacking!! Tic Tac!!!
:: Look to this day... For yesterday is but a dream and tomorrow, only a vision... But TODAY well-lived, makes every yesterday, dreams of happiness and tomorrow, vision of hope.
GOD IS WAITING ON YOU


Details | Free verse | |

Sanguinary Lord

A severe façade of loving tolerance Dipped in an argentine semblance The Consuls of The Cross Weaving a sweven of Welkin Where the checkered ones Are never allowed Their souls cast into the flames Of a greater decay The never ending pit Of eternal torment You turn the other cheek The one that wields the clandestine dagger The dreams of being free grow lighter and light The truth is shrouded by sister-Night Clinging onto existence Never eluding the resistance I will never adhere To your Sanguinary Lord Bestowing The Crusader’s reign Against the sand and the desert’s wane Barraging him over the frame In desperation to appease Screaming and shouting I will wash away your sins Decadence of the ones to throw the stones The ones to enforce the book Has left your lies dry and ready to die No more tears are left to cry No more screams are left to scream No More blood to be split No more graves to be dug


Details | Free verse | |

Anniversary

September 2

So handsome you were, 
so pretty me 
hot 
real hot 
hottest day of the year 
four in the afternoon 
we sizzled our way up the aisle

I giggled through the I do's 
It's what I do when I'm nervous 
You didn't flinch 
but you squeezed my hand. 
You were solid 
We were solid 
It was hot.

Shiny and bedazzled 
smiles so radiant you still need sunglasses 
just to look at the pictures.

You'd think we'd have known 
with our fine educations 
that objects will assume the temperature of their surroundings 
unless energy is added. 
Some things you can learn in a classroom. 
Others take experience. 
Free thinkers and skeptics need more of the latter 
so we lived in defiance 
of thermodynamics 
a perpetual motion machine.

But Joule was right. 
Winters were bitter 
frozen 
motionless 
grey.


You quit squeezing my hand. 
I quit giggling. 
You became hollow. 
We became hollow. 
so hollow that when 
I recalled a giggle one day 
you flinched. 
The icy shell shattered.

The heat of the explosion 
was only enough 
to melt the shards, 
slowly wept away, 
fresh blood of casualty in the wake.

Bathed in experience's lessons 
healing salts of time 
scabs give way to tender scars 
and feeling reemerges. 
I noticed it this summer 
the warmth. 
It's been hot.

May you feel it, too, 
and be 
Happy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nancy Jones
SOFT SENSUALITY


Details | Free verse | |

How could You!!

How can u do this to me we are married and u 
betrayed me i love you and u cant except that how 
can u say that she is pretty and i tried to get u to say 
that to me so many times how can u be so cynical!!

I know i made mistakes but it just feels that u are 
trying to get back at me like revenge how can u do this 
i love u but i have to be strong i lost everything for u
and yet it feels like u don't appreciate me!!

How could u its like i hate u with all my heart if u love some-
one u have to prove to that person that person how do u expect
me to forgive u yes i know it was just that u told her that she was beautiful 
but what the heck am i a piece of trash!!

How can this be I LOVED YOU!! but know it just seems that i cant take this
i do almost everything for you and yet u cant except that my life is like a 
fairy tale gone wrong u were my prince charming and now its like u are 
just another guy that hurts me !!!

Does this not bother you how can love just fade away yes you say
that u still love me and you are sorry but how can i trust u its like 
my world just came crashing down!!! How do you forgive some one
that lies to you and in your face!!

You know i fell like forgiving you cause the baby but i just cant live a lie 
its like am just going to make my life a living H*ll and how can i do that 
to my baby!! I LOVE YOU so much even more then you can imagine and i 
would do stuff for you that only me and you know about and yet u dont 
appreciate me !!! How can this be!!!

But like they say life goes on i know that it going to take work for me to forgive
but what more do i have!! Everything was all gone and know my life is just there 
how do i forgive if i know in my heart that am going to have this in my mind all the 
time when i look at you and see when ur on your phone or computer am going to be
thinking is he telling that girl she is prettier than me!!!

It will take a lot of time to trust you again But what more can i do you are the only
thing i have right know i have no where to go so what more can i do life goes on !!
I just need to know one thing NEXT time all H*ll will break loose and we will See how 
you do that cause i will live you with no word and you will never be able too see your kid!!


Details | Free verse | |

The Apple Tree

A breeze brings a crisp bite to my skin,
the warmth of a soft jacket provides the warmth I need.

Somewhere,
I can hear the sparrows chirping,
Robins singing their songs.
Even Crows screeching, casting small shadows on the day.
I don't even care.

Those shadows won't cross my mind for today,
I want this to be a good day.

I only fought a little uphill,
the grass slightly brown from the Autumn air.

My apple tree of gold, scarlet, and honey hues stood on top of the hill,
with branches stretching for the sun's kiss.

A smile,
a tear from the corner of the eye escaping.

A tire swing gently sways,
giving the reminder of happier, melodious memories.

The tire was weather worn,
and the rope ripe with age,
the tree's youth had fallen to.

Crunchy leaves echo and mask the silence I was seeking for,
the bark was rough under my fingers.

Just like the months have been.

I laid out my patchwork quilt,
and slept the day away in peace.


Details | Free verse | |

On A Day Long Ago

I look toward the double doors,swaying
Becoming unbalanced in many ways
Yet you were not there for my eyes
To feast upon this most special
Day of days so alone and lonely I stood
There were sympathetic murmurs out in
That sea of well-wishers,family and friends
Some angry,some bemused for their
Approval was never received and still
I did not feel any of their gazes for I was
In a deep,dark hole and then it was over
Hopes and dreams were shattered,my life too
Was damaged for a long time dearest,however
I had to learn to forgive you for you were a 
Troubled soul even though I thought I had healed
You and myself too it was not to be so now I
Look at your beautiful picture once in a great while
Wondering if your life has any shades of
Happiness and I pray for your well-being
Please know that I have let the anger go
It's a burden that poisons the soul and causes
The heart to turn to stone and I have learned
At long last to love and I am filled up with
Brightness again-I've forgiven you and I am free





** for "Forgiveness" contest sponsored by Audrey Carey


Details | Free verse | |

The First Stone- Part II

He cleared the pebbles from around them
And then, with his finger
He started making marks in the sand

The crowd hushed
Not a sound could be heard
What was he writing?
He could stand in no longer
He pushed his way to the front of the crowd
His knuckles white against the stone
That he still carried
The stone that could bring a swift death
If aimed right
He intended to throw the first stone
To put her out of her misery
It was the right thing to do
The honorable thing

What he saw there in the swirls of sand
Made the color drain from his face
Did others see his name there?
The man who had lead her into sin
Who had ravished her?
Who had trapped her?
Did they see his sin there
Written plainly in the sand? 

He looked around
Terrified
Knowing that he would be stoned
Then he heard the Rabbi speak
What was that he heard in his voice
Reproach?
Anger?
Hate?
No…it was something else
Only later would he be able
To give it a name…
Disappointed love

“Whoever is without sin,
Let him cast the first stone.”
The rabbi turned his face
And look into his eyes
Into his heart
A knowing look
A pained look

He heard the thundering of a myriad stones
Falling to the ground
As the crowd turned to make
A hasty retreat

Everyone’s face masked in guilt
And he ran away
Mingling with the crowd
But instead of going home
He dashed behind an outcropping of rocks
He couldn't tear himself away
Not knowing
What would happen to her
And so he waited
The stone still in his hand
Heavy with his anger, his shame, his guilt

He fixed his eyes on the rabbi
As he saw him turn to her
She lay trembling
Her ears covered
Her body taut with the expectation
Of the impact of that first stone
He extended his work worn hands to her chin,
Gently lifting her face to him
His thumb wiped her tears
And his hand cupped her face
As he gently asked, 
“Woman, where are your accusers?”
Liked a trapped animal
She looked around
Fear in her eyes 
Her face streaked with dirt and tears
Her lips quivering…
In voice filled with wonder she stuttered
“They are…they are gone, master.”

He raised her to his feet
As she clutched at his prayer shawl
Frantically trying to bring some
Honor into her word of shame
The Rabbi quickly took off his outer garment
And covered her 
As he said, 
“Neither do I condemn you.
Go, and sin no more.”

His prayer shawl, covered with his filth, with blood and dirt
Fluttered to the ground.

Besides the quiet sound of her grateful weeping
The only other sound that broke the
The profound silence of the courtyard
Was the loud thud of the fallen stone
The first stone.


Details | Free verse | |

The First Stone- Part I

As they threw her to the ground
He quickly drew back into the crowd
Adjusting his clothing
Hoping to go unnoticed
To fit in

He watched her
Cover her bare breast
With his prayer shawl
Why hadn't he been smart enough
To grab that from her?

She long raven hair
Was a poor covering
For her nearly naked form
The anger around him
Was a wave of sound
That throbbed over the crowd
Increasing in volume to a feverish pitch

They had planned it well
The scheme to trap him
The young upstart Nazarene
The young rabbi
The revolutionary
Who spoke of love
And a new kingdom

He had been paid well
To seduce  her
The timing had to be right
But he almost forgot all that
As he tasted her beauty
And drank in her wonder
As he ravished her body

She was exquisite in every way
And just when he was about to
Consummate the treachery
They burst in on them

As they pulled him off of her
He heard her screams as she
Tried to clean away what
He’d left behind
Some of them pawed her
Hungry
Wishing they could have a turn
Yet knowing that there was a greater purpose
They restrained themselves
Unleashing their anger
In rough handling
And in shaming her with words
That made him cringe

In the town courtyard they found him
Speaking to the masses
Healing…
And they flung her to the ground before him
Demanding to know
What to do with an adulteress....

What would he answer?
Either way…they had him nailed
To stone her was the thing to do
According to the law of Moses
Would he uphold it?
If he let her go
They could say he had come to abolish
The law…and he would lose
The confidence of the masses

As he stared at her
Through the gaps in the crowd
He almost felt guilty
Almost...
The money he would be paid
Would help in many ways
And the pleasure had been intense
He looked for a stone
Had to play the part
If someone else recognized him
Or that cursed prayer shawl
He would be stoned as well

He shouted
Louder than the others
More vehemently than the others
“Stone her, Stone the prostitute”

The pushing and shoving lessened
The sound was dying out
His eyes were transfixed on the young Rabbi
What was that expression on his face?
What was that look in his eyes?
He took in the woman at his feet
Balled up on the ground...
She was frantically trying to cover herself
All the while
Sobbing out her shame
Her long hair veiling her face

In his eyes
There was no disgust
No revulsion
No hate
A shadow of indescribable sadness crossed his face
As he bent down beside her...

Please Continue to Part II for the ending.


Details | Free verse | |

You Make Beautiful Things

Usually, I just pass by
with a glance, read their
life story without making
eye contact so my wallet 
doesn’t feel sympathy,
but this time, his cardboard 
sign screamed at my heart.
It was as if his soul breathed 
hope onto what he wraps 
himself in at night.
His cried out eyes
had a thick layer of 
fog over the pupil,
nostrils were cracked,
wrinkles grinned 
dog fur white.
Yesterday, in Palo Alto,
I gave a homeless man 
money,
my freedom only
cost three dollars.


Details | Free verse | |

He Is Always There

You may not believe in Miracles
But I for one sure do
I know a man whose life was hell
And followed Satan's dream. 

Through drugs and every  vice you could name
He fit into Satan's scheme
But God just waited and smiled
He knew it was only for a while.

The day did come this man saw the light
Satan let down his guard
God stepped up held out His hand
And took Michael back into His arms.

Not only had he been saved
But God had His own Dream
And Michael fit the profile
In His Apostleship it seems.

Yes the man who had been through hell
Is now changing lives
With his writings he can take you
Through all of the filth and vile

With his poems you will weep 
And see another world
From where many of those we love
Never will return.

He hasn't made any excuses
He admits to it all
That's why in words and actions
He can now stand tall.

With his health he now pays
But his mind is clear
He can walk us through Satan's hell
And prove that God still cares.

Satan's loss is our gain
God works in many ways
Free will can be a blessing 
Or it can be a curse.


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We'll Change The World

Consequences, consequences punishments and lost friendships even with they seem so endless they're gone before the dawn Then when the dawn is here again we are revived, new life begin and the sin was washed away don't have to pray when he talks to me Your weakness makes us stronger, longer if we are quiet, we're quite somber slipping slowly into the water excuses are what hold us under We hold ourselves there until we're ready to take hold of the wheel with enough direction to have control we all can get there, but who ever knows until hope and fear are recognized we'll change the world, not afraid to try.


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The Blue Sea is Red

The blue sea is red
Full of the blood lost
The war that took over
Allowing those who died
To be remembered
The blue sea is red
After all those wars
Blood has shed
And now the blue sea is red
Allowing us to see
Our world is coming
Coming to an end
The blue sea is red
Full of the lost lives
The blue sea is red
Full of our remembrance


Details | Free verse | |

Lucky charm

Breaks an egg and out comes the sun
Begging for forgiveness
For lighting
Ducks sailing on the spikes
Women watching them trough keyholes,
Light diffracted into Meduses-
My happy face
Circularly deformed-
The brave man behind lens
Is the sunset’s zipper
Of the blue eye spot-
Her face – mechanic eyes
Lied on the floor, naked-
A pomegranate breaks beside her-
Lucky charm, said someone –


(originally written in modern Greek and released in February 2006 from Nocturnal 
Publications – translated here by the author)


Details | Free verse | |

Healing Scars

The putrid scars left from the past
Like most things, will never last
Finding a lover who binds them with zeal
In hopes of letting their other half, know it is real

But do not ever take the fear or the pain
Of another with thyself as to blame
For it is not the one who is presently their
It is you that is the sight of fresh, loving air!

Oh God, the thought of losing that half
Of a person’s heart, which was built to last
The scars that are healing from the wicked before
Never again to feel the pain that was endured

The lashing out in suspicion is mere self defense!
It never means that one’s heart with you, is tense
After the words that are spoken comes sorrow
For what if the words make all gone by tomorrow

It is a terrible thing to think of that lost
Everything is done to keep this heart, not matter the cost
So forever remember, there is love in this heart
Never trembling, nor fading, nor spreading apart


Details | Free verse | |

I'll be there

In life there is always one mistake and I made one of those mistakes Of course it'd be me to make that mistake and well here we are apart out of love out of each others hearts and I guess I won't Get that chance back but if there is one thing I kknow It's that I'll always be there for you And I won't let anything happen to you In my heart well i guess I don't have a heart left It's been shattered so many times But I won't let anything hurt you and if it does then i wouldn't have been able to keep my promise But one I know I will keep is I'l be there for you forever and always.


Details | Free verse | |

Inner conflicts

Trees are falling down in my world.
The sun has gone down and it's not hot anymore. 
The season is winter.
I find more and more that the dark side is speaking to me in tongues.
She wants me to be bad and lean over to her. 
I am in a tug of war match.
But I don't want to be.

I run screaming into the church to forgive me for I have sinned. 
I ask them to wash away my unpure thoughts. 
But than I remember that were all human.
I am allowed to make a mistake.
I leave a paper trail of my regrets and I detest littering. 
I am hopelessly in love.
I am hopelessly in lust.
But the bottom and the top of my heart
belongs to the one that I have fallen for.
 
She owns my heart.
She owns my eyes. 
She has the ability to make me cry.
The daggers she throws I deserve them I know.
So I take them as punishment for my lustful thoughts.
Home is where the heart is and my heart is with her.
She will never realize how sorry I truly am.

In these last couple of months I have devoured her trust.
I never realized how big of a part I would play in destroying us.
"I will never hurt you" people say that and that's the biggest lie.

We hurt unconsciously. We hurt without even meaning to. 
We leave little stab wounds every so often.
We run off and leave each other bleeding everyday.
People are not afraid to hurt their afraid of the outcome.
Death, loneliness, prosecution. 
People will lie in love until the world is ending.
 
I sincerely meant it when I said I never thought I'd hurt her.
When I told her that I would be different.
I will never say those words to anyone again. 
I won't promise that I won't do it again. 
After all humans were created from eve's great mistake. 
I craved the apple but I never did taste.

I looked in the mirror and I barely recognize my own face.
This girl I see she said many things.... 
She didn't keep up with the many promises she made.
But this girl she is still learning the rules to this game.
She sucked at life just like she sucked at chess. 
At the age of twenty and three she is not done 
growing yet. 


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y r u soo ugly

y bother y bother y bother y bother y bother y bother y bother


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Answers

Why am I what I am? Often I have wondered this, Life has a way of making you look at yourself and ask the questions you may not want the answers to. More often than not by the time the questions are asked... it's too late. The answers are always exactly what you knew they would be, they were there all along. The problem is that you don't want to know the answers because then you have to change who you are to deal with the things you don't want to deal with. So by ignoring them you may fool one's self into a false sense of well-being, while all along you are rotting inside. Now that I have asked the questions, I have begun to realize that if I would have dealt with them a long time ago the people around me wouldn't have had to pay the price for my selfish arrogance. I still have a long way to go, but now that I have begun to ask the questions, the answers don't hurt as bad as I thought they would. In the end, Deep inside, the answers to the questions are the very thing that will heal and save your life, and the people around you. In the end you have always known that the people you love are the answer to the questions. They are the ones that will save you. They are the healing answers.


Details | Free verse | |

Station Bench

Everyone is a child's child.

Everyone is grown some
little, some hardly at all.

Everyone is one
until they are none,
no more.


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Serenade To The Wolf

When we are rendered alone
And don't know where we should go
We new to overcome
The forces who drag us under

Some will persist to stay
But the darkness only grows ever stronger
It's time to anew

Though it gets harder every day
I'll promise I'll always live for you
There's no need to state your pain
I already see it in your eyes
We can break from their lies
Come and see what you have
come and see what you have is me


Details | Free verse | |

To Be White Again

Life at its beginning is white for all
Cleanly and perfect- singular in design
Warm fed and comfortable
But life through the ages tarnishes the white
Sometimes as sudden as a bucket of black paint
Drenched and permeated and you soak for days
You try to get white and clean but
There remains the tail-tell signs of grays and blues
Creviced in the minds and hearts of all who were in your studio 
Friends acquaintances family and strangers
Know and see the tartered canvas of white
More often than not a white with blotch
So who can make me white again
“Not be the hairs of my chinny chin-chin”
What can make me white again
“Nothing but the blood of Jesus”


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A Lasting Smile

                                      I crawled away till it was miles...
                                     Still I dreamed I saw your smile...
                                       In a world that's built on stilts...
                                  The balance of love should never wilt...
                                      An escape that eludes my mind...
                             Through the darkness the time is not so kind...
                                 So I sat on a decision and teared awhile...
                               And in my dream I thought I saw your smile...
                              I reached for a word that describes a thought...
                               But silence still folds around me as I fought...
                                With a deep breath I screamed until I wept...
                              And in the corner all the goodbyes were swept...
                                 I now stand away and live in a different style...
                                       But still I dreamed I saw your smile...


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Gulf Blue Waters -- X X X

A spec, lazily floating upon : “ The Gulf  Blue Water “
And then there were two specs, entwined together Spot
Black hole, in the Beauty of  “ The Gulf Blue Water “ 
A spec to a SPOT ( it even sounds so much Stronger )
When two Spots meet : Meld : Creating an “ Epic Drop “
Yet to the East, West, South, North  Thousands of Drops
Mixing and matching; Defiling “ The Gulf  Blue Water “
Let’s flash : To the future of the shore: Where Oysters Dance
As the alarm of “ Destruction” sounds off in “ Lazy Blue Waters
To the land and marshes : Prepare for Doom : from the “ Black Gulf Waters “
A Tsunami of Hell’s Fury Designed by Mankind’s “ Ignorance of Nature “
Who’s here to help us “ Marshland Security “ ASPCA “, The Government??

          Inspired by " Team POETRYSOUP'S Contest "Gulf Oil Spill"


Details | Free verse | |

Guilt

It stays with you
Never letting you forget
The pain you caused someone
The guilt
Will always remain in you
You can't help but be in misery
Knowing you will never be forgiven
The guilt
Eats you alive
Leaves you feeling alone
Knowing you will never be able to live your life the same
The guilt
Will always run you life
And leave you hanging
Scared
And empty
The guilt


Details | Free verse | |

Humor for the sinner

Hey,Father,give me my blessing.It's two posts since my last transmission

Yes,my child.What's wrong with that?

I have no idea,Father.

This is for confessing sins.

I know,it must be fascinating.Can you tell me a few general categories of the most popular sins?

But the confessional is sacred...

Well,I come here a lot and I'm running out of ideas for my blog.

Blogging is sinful.

Really?It's not mentioned in my Missal.

No doubt it will be in the next edition!

Why is it sinful?

I believe it takes your mind off the people around you.

Exactly!

Can't you do anything about these people?

I've tried praying for them,seducing them,ignoring them,emailing them.

And what happened.

Nothing at all.They just ignore me.

Why don't you ignore them?

That's a wonderful idea.

Now,to cut back your blogging you need to learn the oboe...

Why,Father?

You can't type when playing the oboe and it's cheaper than a piano..

Gosh,you are so clever.

And your playing will be so awful that it will make your housemates speak to you..

That's unlikely,they are all cats!

Oh,you nincompoop.Be off or I'll kick you out myself..

That's not wholly holy or even holey.

Be off or I'll send you a rhyme.

About time!

How about the design?
?
I am thinking, sublime?

Will it be mine?


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Shadows in Candlelight

Feeble and hunched over
his movement stumbles
as shuffling feet echo
in the shadows
of a candle-lit
forgotten church
as the old priest
performs his sacred rituals
to a few faithful followers


A commitment to the cloth
harbourer of hidden secrets
an unclaimed inheritance
no longer passed on
the last remaining elders
keepers of unwanted wisdom
take their secrets
to the grave


Details | Free verse | |

FORGIVING OPRAH

    Forgiving Oprah

Today I’m going to forgive Oprah
After twenty-five years
I am settling all of our differences
I had no right to expect her to be
A stimulus for Black progress
And though I would rather have seen
An Oprah University 
Or an Oprah Medical center
Instead of an Oprah magazine
Those were her billions
To spend anyway she chose
And it was selfish of me
To expect her to make Black life any better
Or even different
Just because Harriet Tubman did it
With no help from a single celebrity
Or Martin Luther King made us better
With little or no money
And no television show
But Black heroes are like space ships
They just appear once every twenty-five years
Out of the Blue
I apologize for thinking it was you


I forgive you Oprah
And I forgive you
Tyler Perry 
And Lebron
I forgive you too


Details | Free verse | |

Honest to God Free Verse grammer not fixed

why cant the pain
burst in the release of anguish 
threw my ears
threw the eyes
down the road 
of so many lies
so many tears
wasted time
hours in the dark looking to see
crying to feel something that isnt there
to feel alive
cold tears down my neck
warm blood down my wrist
dead inside
nothing's okay 
its not alright
this addiction called suffering
the agony the smile behind this pain
agony and suffering
a twisted grin as you scream my name
down the dark abise threw the gates of my judgement
your dead to me
it dosent matter your here alone
down on your knees
something gone
it was never missing
because it was never there
my words 
the truth
a care in the world
and my sanity


Details | Free verse | |

Omens

Omens
- - - - -
The sweet aroma of rice; yonder bare fields;
on the stone the dark patches of water pitchers
and her looking at the sky where buzzards fly,
are completing the composition of waiting.

She has been waiting too long; too long she has made her man 
hold his patience  all these while; believed peace will come.
Now these flying buzzards are looking ominous 
like secret language which mystic nomads speak. 

She trembles with the prospect of unknown evils.
A long wait for her son, returning from town, 
from the all consuming town where he has gone
long, long, long time ago. But she has hoped for return.

She again watched for God’s language. Let him come.

=© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar 


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THIS PAIN

THIS PAIN IS THE FERTILIZER FOR GROWTH...
HEADACHES FROM THE HEARTACHES,A MINDSET TO STAY 
ON THE STRAIGHT NARROW,CONSISTENTLY HARASSED BECAUSE OF
THE LIFE CHANGE,NO LONGER RUNNING THE STREETS,FORMER FRIENDS 
REFUSE TO COME AROUND BECAUSE I WON'T GET DOWN WITH SMOKING
TREES AND CONSUMING FORTY'S....
  THIS PAIN HAS CAUSED ME TO BE LONELY,I LOVE TO FELLOWSHIP WITH
THE SAINTS THEY GIVE ME A NATURAL HIGH WITH NO SIDE AFFECTS,IT FEELS
GOOD TO BE CAREFREE AND NOT HAVE TO IMPLANT EYES IN THE BACK OF MY 
HEAD,LIVING THE LIFE ON SUSPICIOUS IS VICIOUS......
  THIS PAIN IS A DETOXIFICATION,I HAVE THE SHAKES AND THE SWEATS, I
NEED IMMEDIATE TREATMENT WITH AN AFTER CARE PLAN....FLESH IS WARING
WITH MY SPIRIT I CAN'T STAND IT....
   THIS PAIN HAS CAUSED ME TO SHUTDOWN SOCIALLY,I'M EXPERIENCING
FEELINGS FROM A-Z...
   THIS PAIN HAS CAUSED ANXIETY LORD GIVE ME THE POWER TO HANDLE THIS 
STORM.THE THUNDERBOLTS WERE SHOCK TREATMENTS FOR CLEANSING THE
WICKEDNESS AND THE GRIM FROM THE EYES...
    I CAN NOW APPRECIATE THE THORNS THAT TORE THE FLESH..
NOW I CAN ATTEST THAT THIS PAIN WAS FERTILIZER FOR SPIRITUAL GROWTH...
                                            THIS PAIN....



Details | Free verse | |

Third Milestone- Part 2 -A Peek into the Distraught Mind

ME
Loving, giving, caring,
Always trying.
ME
Contradicting, dissatisfied, lying, forgetful.
I
Easily satisfied, slow to anger, quick to love.
I
Afraid, fearful, often lazy.

Inability to apply myself
TRUE
Ability to acknowledge
TRUE

Confident?
Never.
Right, almost always.
Right, not to you.
Right, never.
Left, long ago
Left, too late
Who said go?
I didn't hear them.
So you tell me,
Where does this road lead?
Guidance? Truth?
Too big, too easy.
So easy, in fact, we couldn't comprehend.
Meaning and reason saw themselves out,
You should inform them
Before confused and depressed return.


Details | Free verse | |

Oil Spill

Pelicans
Dipped in a hard oil exteriors in LOUSIANA ARE SUFFERING
Why must natures angels suffer from human destruction
Their mouths quieted by the fact that their vocal chords are voiceless
and they choke on liquids humans define as precious
But their eyes like a crystal balls show that their hope is beginning to deteriorate
Their angelic feathers now drooping like 10000 lb heavy weights
Agonized by poisons they grieve the acknowledgement of what a beautiful life they could have had............. before we took it without consent
Lackluster from exhaustion they hang their heavy heads
Defeated, is their miracle coming to save them yet?
Such graceful beauteous creatures lay with their feet in the air many are inanimate
Still they hang on defiant against the weary arm of death
Awaiting to soar higher than the sunset


Details | Free verse | |

Like Father, Like Daughter

Your hair. Your eyes. Your last name.
What else did I get of yours father?
Your temper?
No that's mothers, it's obvious.
Your love of music?
We'll never know.
Your love of motorcycles?
Well I'm not quite there yet.
Your hate of caring for small children?
Yes, yes I got that father.
Did it hurt you to say “give it up”?
Because it hurt me to know
I would do exactly the same.

Am I like you father?
Why yes, yes I am.


Details | Free verse | |

i forgive

Forgiving to forget 
The hurt deep 
inside of me 
Looking out 
from the dark 
Into the light 

The spell is broken 
Setting you free 
A prisoner, 
in the dungeons 
Each heartbeat
 in you 
I saw the truth 
in the lie 

Created by the inability, 
in the bond of love 
Broken hearted 
Finding my way back 
To have the freedom 

You took it 
from the heart's warmth 
Choosing another 
Laying waste emotion 
Not caring, 
heartless 
without God 

Lusting another 
Showing in words 
To inflict 
maximum pain, 
be my best friend 
In never hurting 

I forgive you 
Moving on 
enjoy your new 
found freedom, 
vanishing 

from the inner world 
Wishing happiness, 
my present 
as the beginning 
In the end 
I forgive


Details | Free verse | |

Our Love Is Enough

We don't need to go out and party,
We don't need to drink,
We don't need to socialize,
We don't need to go shopping,
We don't need to spend money,
We don't need to go to a movie,
We don't need to watch sporting events,
We don't need to go out to eat,
Because we found love,
And our love is enough.


Details | Free verse | |

prayer of a penitent

Lord--
turn not away Thy face

Thou desirest not the death of a sinner

Thou desirest for men to come unto Thee
so that Thou mayest gather them
the way a hen gathers her flock

i have not been true to Thee
i have not harkened to Thy voice




                                 11/3/07


Details | Free verse | |

The skinny moneyed man returns

Mocking the rest of utopians,possesed of diathermy
the skinny moneyed man is vaccinated with noisy triumph.
He is going to massacre thousand souls again.
Fear came upon us with a smile of understanding
and drones decided to stay in concealment for months.

Nothing hurts like the truth gnawed by mice
as the despicable events stirred me to pity.
I cut my hair very closely but there was such a jam,
that i couldn't get in.
He tried to obscure the issue but his reason was clouded by hatred.

He squandered his money on idle pleasures,
"iam sorry if i have offended you",
made the punishement fit the crime
"here's a toast to our success",
using the sponge of sodomy.

The air seemed vibrant with the sweltering heat,
as the sphinxs of misery made my egoism full of vigilance
Skinny now holding a bag for me,trying to redeem
my sins.


Details | Free verse | |

Merry Christmas to All

Though we all do celebrate birthdays,
the best birthday,
falls on the twenty fifth of December,
as on this day,
our Lord,
Jesus Christ had been born,
the day is considered indeed great,
as the Son of God,
had come into this world,
and had left us by forgiving our sins,
the day begins,
by people of all castes visiting various Churches,
and offering their prayers to the Lord in here,
on this day,
the day is celebrated with a lot of passion,
and fervour,
wherein we also get to wine and dance, 
and be merry all the while,
the kids are quite happy,
as on this day,
they receive lovely gifts,
for been good kids, 
from a very special man, 
known as Santa Claus
by acting as a postman, 
but differs in style and in his way,
by delivering the gifts in advance,
as he does know that,
there is no use in relying with the snail mail,
and the kids would indeed be sad,
if they don’t get their presents in time,
whereby he does not take the usual route,
but always takes the wrong one,
by entering through the chimneys
or through the fireholes, 
how he does it,
we have no idea,
inspite of been fat,
his favourite are the cookies indeed,
wherein he seeks an easier way to get into the houses of the kids,
here’s a message,
he leaves for you all,
wishing you all a Merry Christmas!!

Dt:-21st November, 2012, Name :- Manu Nair


Details | Free verse | |

Keep The Light In Sight

If I do, I hope that I Exit in the presence of Jesus Christ we go far back do he and I for his greater mercy once saved my life Five long lost years have past since then I gave my all so he forgave my sins a weary soul, crucified I hope he's holding me the day I die I tried my damndest to find the light and when I found it kept it in sight it's never left me I know I'm right come try and take it I'll end your night I look up fondly to the sky an understanding between he and I one time I asked him lend me his eyes and I saw a world left cold and dry In conversation we talk, no words he understands me when I'm most unheard think I'm absurd what are you? a higher being? still much confused You think the answer lies in your ways I think the Devil must be repaid he'll collect heavy your wasted time as you spend eternity at his side I see a servant for wickedness try to distract me one more dismissed I keep on walking through the night as I keep his spirit so well alive I wear your pride inside my skin as you race to the finish I just begin to be a soldier alone with the night nothing to warm me but his light in sight.


Details | Free verse | |

Forgive My Rudeness

Forgive my rudeness
When I get in your way.
I do not mean to glow so brightly
When you put your darkness on display.

I swear it is not out of spite
That I outshine your ego's fire
When it is burning to intimidate -
To scortch my self esteem to ash.

Excuse my posture
When it will not sway your way
The roots are to blame
For this downright defiance
That I stand with uprightness
Though youre wacking away
With sharpened blades of anger.

Do pardon the heights
That my spirit soars
But consider yourself warned today: 
They do not stop for any man
So spare yourself and
Get out of my way! 


Details | Free verse | |

A Soul Will Be Saved

And then the day came
                That I found my self lost in the void of my own emptiness
And as suddenly as a tree bust into flames
      After being stuck by lightening
My heart sank
              I felt so lost and alone
The walls ran red with my blood
                     For they were all I had left to beat
And my busted knuckles bleed with the vengeance of hate
I cursed the Lord above as the gooners burst into my cell
AND WE FOUGHT
        Overcome and beaten
Hogtied and broken
                  I refused any medical aid
For my hate drank the pain
             And I wept
               ALONE
As deep as the peace of a deer lying in the meadow
I felt the Lord Jesus Christ come unto my soul
And to this day the thought of him
      The depth of his mercy
             Makes me cry
   For I have been forgiven
I became a man of living example
The future holds limitless opportunities for me
                         I bare witness to the darkness of addiction
                          For I have been delivered from the ashes
                            Set free from the chains that bound me
My soul is my Lords as my heart is my wife’s
My life belongs to anyone who is willing to learn
As I ready to embark on the journey of education
My excitement grows with each passing day
Because I know the Lord Jesus Christ
                       Will use me as a lantern of faith 
         And those who teach me will also learn from me
      For my knowledge of emptiness is as vast and barren
          As all of the great deserts spread around the world
            Compiled together in one 6’-2’’ 240 lb. frame
        The depths of my scars are like the Grand Canyon
          Amazing to see and impossible to comprehend
                   This is my story this is who I am
                    My past will never be forgotten
     Because it holds the possibility of higher education
            In regards to the overhaul journey of life
           And hopefully some where along the way
                          A soul will be saved


Details | Free verse | |

A Friend Named John

My dear friend John is a peaceful,
humble and noble giant,
with a red badge of courage.

So, what does God want him to do?

In the historical past,
the slaves needed skills to
survive in the new world.

“They cursed the bread, because
they could not eat the meat.”

Somehow, God provides our daily bread,
and He still provides.

Did you hear the great news?

The mighty African drumbeats are speaking
colorful rhythms throughout the villages.
The drums are singing about freedom for
our brothers and sisters in bondage.

Remember, there is only one God, and
He provides the golden battle shield.
Yes, God is the victory delivering us from evil.

Well, a new day is coming, and we will stand
together on God’s Plymouth Rock.
He is the steady hand, guiding us like a compass,
through a quite storm.

Still, God is everlasting, because He is the
beginning and the end.
God is the water that we thirst
He is the air for our soul to breath
God is the answer to our prayers

My friend John, put your trust in God,
and let God take care of the residue.


Details | Free verse | |

Let's Remove Your Rotten Heart

I'd like to 
tie a tourniquet 
around your 
wounded heart
and watch 
until the blood 
stops dripping
then I would cut away 
the mangled mass
of decaying vessels 
that hang
below the pulsing 
mound of life.

Perhaps then
you could begin, 
begin to feel, 
begin to love, 
begin to live.


Details | Free verse | |

The path of life

Sometimes life seems like its all a downhill road,
like nothing you do makes a difference in the outcome of your life.
At times I have felt like a ship lost in the sea needing a lighthouse to shine a light and
rescue me.
One night I felt like I couldn't go on for another second,
it was then that I decided to ask God for help.
I said "God, if you are really real and really out there please help me!"
Crying as if it were my last moment alive I felt a sudden warmth surround me,
I felt assurance like what we seek from our parents when we are young and need to be
comforted.
I knew it was God, he made it real to me.
I know now that life can seem unfair at times and the road isn't always covered with
roses, there is not always an obvious sign of which direction you should go.
When it feels like you want to give up, don't.
Cry out to God like you would your mommy or daddy when your a kid and scared, even if you
don't really know for sure if he exists, once you do that you will know for sure.
Jesus healed my heart, my life is nowhere near perfect but at least I know I don't have to
walk this path of life alone, God carries me through the rough patches and walks besides
me when I am on more stable ground.
If you want a change in your life and never want to feel alone again ask Jesus Christ to
come into your heart and live in you and show you his love.
The thing about Jesus is that unlike any other person in this world, he will never leave
you or back stab you or hate you for what you have done or said.
He just forgives you and fills you with his love.
The path of life can be uncertain but the road you choose to walk can be made easier with
Jesus Christ walking beside you along the way.


Details | Free verse | |

Perseverance

Within the long days of night I ran seeking always to hide from the seer for only by my motion, could my spree like the unbridled wants of a negligent child be seen. Crying out to the throngs of sinners who sever the umbilicus of light which veers from the godhead, my soul sap suckled from this cape this husk, this endless span of time..I pan pan for the golden sepulcher peering through the pane of church windows never quite alive ..an orphan on a skewer I prance knowing only through healing pain can I persevere.


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not Your Fault

The thing about life
is that
it can end in an instant

When the rope of the
harsh words
wraps tightly around your 

Neck squeezing tighter
and tighter
you just want to jump

To end it all to end all
the pain
and the hatred and words

It is not only the words
that push
you over the edge

It is too the fists and
the feet 
that slam into you

Over and over
without
a break with out letting up 

Making you break down and slide down
the wall
and cry and cry and cry

One phone call can 
save a
live, stopping that jump

Stopping the self hate
and
spreading the love

The love i have for 
you will 
never fade or die and i hope

will make you better
to sleep
and to be able to be 

Happy again to 
be happy
forever and always with me

just remember and know
that it's
NOT YOUR FAULT


Details | Free verse | |

Father, Forgive Them

'Father, forgive them,
For they know not what they do"
I breath out from up on my own cross
Feeling the humiliation and shame
The jeering mocking throng
Those who think they know
What is behind my acts
My words
Who THINK they know
What is in my nature
My heart
Who misconstrue
And abuse
Self-righteous and smug
Who have shouted, “Crucify!”
And driven in the nails
With sanctimonious sighs
And turn a blind eye
To acts of kindness
To the compassion I have shown
Even that they try to taint
With their growing hate
Not knowing, not understanding
The pain I feel for the rejected
For I am rejected too
Even though I bear the truth
Trying to set others free
From their demons of the past
"Father, they cannot see
What is in me!"


"Father, forgive them
They don’t know what they do
I will not confess
To anyone by YOU
You are my father
My judge
The Master of all that was, is and will be
You know my heart
I’m your child
Here on the cross
Having become sin
I hang
Hurt
Bleeding
In pain
From those who question...
My spirituality
My identity
Claiming I’m not who I say that I am
A fake

You cover your face
In my hour of shame
For I have become sin
And you must let me face it..ALONE
That is the greater pain

Father, forgive them
They do not have hearts to feel
Nor minds to discern
Eyes to see
The truth in me
The truth behind my words
They twist and turn
Casting the spear in my side
To make sure I’m dead…..
Forgive them
And give me the strength
For forgive them as well
So that I may taste
The newness of life that awaits
Beyond the shadow of the grave
Resurrection of my soul
Father, Father....forgive"...

Eileen Manassian Ghali


Details | Free verse | |

Danger

Danger
I saw you had the misfortuneof meeting me
are you drunk with my wine? 
are you stoned on my pot?
are you tired of my pain pill's?
coming down off my lsd?
are you ready for rehab?
all in all i didn't lie
i said if you can't hang with weirdo's
don't be a fool keep you ass
in school.


Details | Free verse | |

Where's The Blame Contest Entry

Forgive me, please hear my call and answer, 
Tell me that you'll forgive me, for all the wrong I've done. 
I've punished myself everyday though it never seems enough, 
Scars across my flesh, haunting memories in my eyes. 
I wish I could hold you, gently, warmly, tightly, 
Pour into you my deepest grief, my sorrows, and never let you go. 
Im left a crumbled being on my knees, wishing you could hear my cries, 
Listen to my appologies and accept that I would be the one to rather die. 
Can't you feel it, my heart is breaking, shattered by what I've done, 
I'm sick and my body aching, knots in my stomach and Im hyperventalating. 
Please come and answer me, find a way to hear my words, so loudly screamed, 
You loved me once more than I deserved, love me enough now to absolve my hurt. 
Please forgive me Darling, I didn't mean to beg, 
There is nothing left of me but a shadow on the edge of the bed.


Details | Free verse | |

Waiting for a Change

Why do I get burned?
It’s the lesson I frequently try to learn 
No matter what I breathe in and forgive
I only have 1 life to live
One chance to make a Change 
And waiting for it 

Why cant I fit in?
I am all I’ve ever been 
I’m different that makes a threat
Being different makes them break their sweat
So mean that its wrong
But every one stay strong
Some day its going to change
But for now we’re waiting for it 

Why do I care so much?
Because your not like other people and such
You’re a caring person
Remember this
Times get rough
But know when to say enough
And then know it will change 
But until then we’ll wait for it 

Why do you hate me so?
I cant believe you stooped so low
But I will come up laughing 
Just by looking at the surroundings 
Having fun while you wait for me to get sad
I’m not going to so sorry so bad
I’m not going to change
So you can sit there and wait 

Why cant we all get along?
All we need is a song
We could live in peace if we didn’t need drama 
Dealing with that makes me want to go into a comma 
Just waiting for it to change I will sit 
And just wait 

What will happen when I die?
You will fall in to the sky and fly 
Feel the wind flow past you 
Washing away all of your fear
And erasing every tear 
Knowing there would be no more hating 
And knowing that there would be no more waiting 
 
You would finally find your change


Details | Free verse | |

I'm Not Missing You At All

Whisper in ear
Bliss is  true meaning of happiness
Fragrant scents linger on pillow
Splendor when there mine alone
Tranquility sea has diminished
Dulcet smiles have now gone nil
Wafting thoughts of once was
Lilting spirits to soar again
Eloquence yet deterant
Lavender tears still cascade her cheeks


Details | Free verse | |

Breaking The Silence

This house
once filled by
a family of seven
has become a tomb
for one.

If they return
things will be different.
If he finds them
he will be the husband
and father
they need.

Taking another chug
from the bottle of whiskey
his world becomes
a little darker, 
a little warmer.
He knows 
what he needs to do...
but how to do it? 

He takes another bulb
from it's snowman covered box
and gives it a good toss
straight up
suspending it in mid-air
for as long as possible
before it hits 
the cold cement floor
with a hypnotizing ''POP''.

Watching the tiny fragments
scatter across the floor
he sees himself
alone again
and thanks God
that they left the Christmas decorations...
his only way to 
break the silence.




Dedicated to my dad


Details | Free verse | |

Frostbite

I have lived way to long
this world has but a strong grip on me
I am a combination
of love and hate
stirred vigorously
the chain reaction left me 
unable to feel remorse for all my actions
as of late
I hate being numb
unable to empathize with your pain
it is but cumbersome to carry this dead weight around
I am bound to pay heavily for my transgression
towards the human race
I have inform you in fair warning
that if you touch my heart you will
get frostbite


Details | Free verse | |

It's The End Either Way

 
Beg me to forgive you, maybe I won’t
Marvel in my ability to see you how you are
I’m content in myself
I see a hopeless romantic, trapped in emotions bound with passion
The good are last -always
They are supposed to die young, but they can live to be last as well
It’s the end either way
It’s terrible to have never loved, this is true,
but a life time of losing in love…..?
You hand me another
Beg me and maybe I won’t
Whose heart is on the line here?
I’m struggling, desperate not to lose again
Make me fit inside your heart, I will stay there
Give me feelings and I will feel them,
my lines and I will read them
But I am made to see the romantic still trapped and still hopeless
You’re sorry and you’re forgiven,
but the cracks have still been inflicted
To go young or to be last?
Last…..,
though it’s the end either way

Written in Texas -1 APR 2013


Details | Free verse | |

Still with me

My dear beloved friend,
I feel you late at night,
Curled atop my feet,
And keeping my heart alight.
I see your sweet smiling face,
Everytime I close my eyes,
And feel you rub against me,
With all the love you have inside.
My loving baby girl, 
I feel you here beside me,
Comforting me of all my pain,
Your close to me once more,
And I have not to weep as much,
When I feel your tail waggin against my legs. 

RIP My Puppy Camille <3 
I love you babygirl


Details | Free verse | |

Distinction Righteously be Picturesque

We poured into a large bowl called Earth
Where all the pomposity of the nation rests in the outlets of self narcissistic
The rigors of high nationalism born from a pride in the name of race and nation
Not infrequently conduct the leadership headed  to the wrong way ...

We with the miscellaneous of stereotypes 
Become the benchmark of a certain behavior
Make our own brand as if it had been patented by our nature
A birth which supposed to destroy all the barriers and unify

A synergy that should be purified
Adorn every corner by dismissed our own selfish
Turn your self but turned no mess
Achieve the spectrum, create the rainbow

The differences will not brings us in any despicable
Nor make us even better than others
Due to our differences we complement each other
Due to the differences we understand each other

Don't make any excuses for the differences
Don't depart your self into a paradigm which merely been relative
Make the differences become a decent things to be heard
And beautiful as it seen though it's hard

Author's Note:
Represent my concerns over the war of Palestine and Israel which finally reached their agreement to finish the war.


Details | Free verse | |

A HARSH REALITY

Too many children have had to grow without ever having a parent to know.
Ran through the foster parent system,with no one ever asking them.
And what occurs when they get some bad ones,beatings,isolation,sexual assaults done.
Then growing up and living with what occured,their conscience telling them this is absurd.
So they go through life being afraid and believing that those who hurt them must be obeyed.
It truly is a sick circle they must live in,and how this affects others is truly a sin.
So we must try to get them through this and most times it will be hit and miss.
But someone must be there for them,to ask those crucial questions where and when.
For if they never release that pain inside,they will always surely run and hide.
So "PLEASE" dear LORD! Set there evil free,and when they've released their pain could we 
then work on me.


Details | Free verse | |

The Chasm

In anger
You told me
A chasm lay between us,
I looked
Saw it there
I recognised
My own handiwork
Horrified, repenting I
Built a bridge,
With strong foot boards
Tempting you to cross
I added shiny rails,
To stop you falling.
I sweep the boards
And polish the rails,
Most every day.
But you don't come 
To see,
To cross.
One day the dust will stay
The rails will start to corrode.
Then if you cross,
You will find
Only an empty wasteland
And my dust
Blowing in the wind
Unknowable.


Details | Free verse | |

The Test Master

The test master fights his addiction to the brutal end his weakness, an undesired friend until he casts out every demon In his helpless idiotic stupor he stumbled into false idols who presented him with pretend hope now at the end of the rope reality shatters high up the ladder stuck in denial for an eternal while pile on a thousand bricks to amend towards forgiveness for the addiction to bliss Seeking the light that leads from his plight away from the disease with minimal friction to slay the addiction now called test master for the disaster was just the beginning the hole is mending from the ashes fly off phoenix for he survived the meanest course of life with tales to tell children who live in constant night my faith hasn't reached it's peak until I am tested like the friend which of I speak


Details | Free verse | |

A Love Poem

A Love Poem

Get under my shoe.
Crawl down there and flatten.
Spread yourself, ooze
Between the cracks of my heels,
Solidify with old gum and dog hair and
Stay there.
Squish when I tip to the balls of my feet,
Sink into cement,
Drown out in the moist heat of
Baltimore sunshine.
Stick to the blacktop,
Leave small chunks of yourself behind to
Dry out and crust over
For a dog to nibble,
Or a bum to piss on,
Or a crow to pick at
He’ll peck out your eyes, 
At least what’s left of them.
I’ll track the rest of you home through
Back alley water and random piles of
Dog shit.
Then I’ll loosen and scrape you with
An old gnarly stick,
Fling your remnants across my front porch and
Walk inside,
Without thought,
Leave you there to
Ponder your shit-and-scum-covered existence before the
Noonday rains come and wash you away.


Details | Free verse | |

Bicker

You make me want to 
crawl out of my skin.
A minute later, I want
to jump on you.
You tell me that you love me
and then all hell breaks loose.
I want to hold you and yell at 
the same time.
Scream at the top of my lungs;
"Are you even listening?"
Then you reassure me that
you won't give up.
A minute later, we're
at it again.
Trust is not the issue,
we are. Distance is.
For this to stop, we
need to be together.
But what if this happens
in person?
Will we argue until we lose 
our breath?
Or will we hold onto each other, 
until it is over?
Just yell,
but make sure you hold me after.


Details | Free verse | |

Momma's Best

Yeah, here's my life. I welcome you to it. Welcome to huge secrets pouring out my mouth because of two thick, pale fingers. Welcome to black blood drippin impurities all over my mother's untouched rugs. Welcome to my personal Hell. Here's the heartache and the vengance that soak with red my wrists. and Here's the sorrow that etches the art above my fists. A toast to the anger streaming down in black, and there are your reminders lining down my back. Retrack the drunken nights with you, and all the screams I cried go back to the days I looked at God and lied. And down there in that bowl is all of my regrets, streaming out in chunks and tears dripping down on momma's best.


Details | Free verse | |

The Warped-up Road

The hues of affliction caught my glimpse 
Maddening horror scratching my doorstep 
Clashing with severe torture,
Scorching away my destiny...my confidence 

Hallucinations take hold 
Risk shoved in a deserted briefcase 
Pluck the rose pedals that reveal your wasteful woe

Now your woe is crystal clear in your outspoken instructions you very much lack 

Magnify the dazzling sensation, 
Drugging my suicidal life and its troubles 

Sparkling risk managing to parachute a confident endeavor from each angle 
Crawling on poverty road...managing to  warp-up easing moments 

Unsteady in your rambling presence 
You are an incredible luck to my immortal life 
Too unbearable to strike down...hunted on the spot 

Magnify the dazzling sensation, 
Drugging my suicidal life and its troubles 

Trails of avarice, wonder my mind far from thee 
I'd diminish all the doubts...clumps of shapeless clay 
Save the case and listen to what I have to say

Keep me away from worrying mad 
Digest the emptiness I feel deep inside 
Leaving a trail of blasted fears 

A mixture of fondness and softness 
Plants on your brushed, blemished whisper,
The atmosphere fairly uneasy to take hold of 

You borrowed from me and stole from my mummified heart
All I seek now is gloom and doom

Resume with your lightening life
Isolate yourself from hardened fear 
Death stares grow unsteady in your figure 
It was as if they never existed in your warm, swirling heart 

I plead you'll never set foot on this road again
I'll some day figure out the unpredictable code 

Be courteous, though your abilities are weak
Lay in dark affliction,
You warped-up poverty road

Walk in secure recovery
After I determine this code
Hold on for dear life
Lay on my palm, if it would help

Walk in secure recovery


Details | Free verse | |

In this moment

For years I have
complained
but in this moment I
am silence
For years I have
struggled
but in this moment I
am peace
For years I have
loathed
but in this moment I
am love

For years I have
fought
but in this moment I
am free
For years I have
been blind
but in this moment I
do see
each moment bears
the seed
to renew reality.


Details | Free verse | |

Thoughts of The Deceiver

Trust runs naught in their veins
Forgiveness lies naught in their hearts
Hate comes off of their tongues
And towards my flesh 
To seep in and wound me
I feel the pain every morn'
I remember every nail of their words
That run through me
These words do naught but harm
These wounds never heal in time
To not have one's trust hurts me
I feel the pain every day
Trust runs naught in their blood
Forgiveness lies naught in their soul
Harshness comes off their tongues
And towards my flesh
To seep in and wound me
I feel the pain every night
I recall their nails of words
That pierce me through so deep
These words do naught but harm
These wounds never heal with time
To never have their trust
I feel that pain that is only mine


Details | Free verse | |

fallen down

fall end down
some, someone that can’t find me when I’m lost
and all the pieces I picked up
that everyone behind me forgot
and the small of me
is somewhere well beyond me
caught up
If we get to get to that again
Well we get to do that
The days move faster
And the knees
Get to be bruised
Under the jeans


Details | Free verse | |

I Dreamed of Jesus (Part 2)

...
My pupils met his, and immediately my eyes opened.
He saw my past, my present and the future to come.
Simultaneously, my body fell to its knees in submission
As I began to wail and confess, "Jesus-!  Jesus-!
I am sorry!  I am sorry!  I love You!  I love You!"
I knew He knew who I was and all I had been doing.
My heart begged for His forgiveness, longing for his love.
With his eyes still fixed on me, I trembled in anguish.
He overshadowed me, and the fear of torment
Particulated off of me.  Then, I saw my mother's face.
(I knew she had been praying for me with great concern.)
Then, without a word, I saw Jesus reach out to me.
He touched my back as if to lift me up with great force,
But with one last cry of His name, "JESUS-!"  I woke myself up.

I was kicking and moving my arms when I came to.
I was still on earth, but it was real.  I confessed my sins again and again.
I went to the bathroom to rouse myself, then to the opened window.
I was hot and sweaty and too afraid to sleep.  I sat up in bed, 
Turned on my bedside lamp, and began to write this dream.
Mirjana, turned toward me and asked me why I could not sleep.
I simply told her that I had to write, and she turned over.
I finally finished, turned out the light, wrapped her arms around me,
And closed my eyes.  I could still see His light brown eyes and outline of His face,
As if I had gazed at the sun too long and its image was x-rayed in my mind.
What was He going to do?  Would He have taken me somewhere?
Was he going to show me something?  Would he come again?
I do not know, but this was the second time I saw Him like this.
All I know is that He is perfect, and there is no darkness in Him at all.


Details | Free verse | |

The Gift Of Love

The gift of love
came down from
heaven many years ago
born in a lowly stable.

He was a gift to
the world, many
believed, others
turned away.

The gift of love
bore His cup 
of sorrow that
night in the garden.

The gift of love
went to the cross
to take our sins
there that day.

The gift of love
gave His life
so that we might
live in heaven.

The gift of love
shed His blood
to cover our
many sins we carry.

The gift of love
is our chance to
seek forgiveness
for our sins.

The gift of love
is Jesus Christ,
but to receive a gift
we must first accept it.

The gift of love
is waiting now,
for you to call
    on Him.

wrote12-18-08

John 3:16   and Romans 10:9-13

Merry Christmas to all of you on Poetry Soup


Details | Free verse | |

Appreciation

thank you isn't enough
for the vision you've shared
our life you wanted because you cared
when I couldn't, didn't completely understand
seeing my soul and needs
when I fought both you and me.
so use to being used, abused
assuming it would be you too
yet time has passed 
and you remain consistent
loving me through all resistance
showing the lack of loving self
your the only one who stood by me to help.

appreciation isn't the correct word
feeling creation sent you to me
to reveal the real meaning of love
so it can be shared to all I touch.
whether verbal or literal
understanding my pain was conditional
no longer relevant 
as you stand with me
emotionally and physically.

gratitude isn't the right term
for everything learned
even the lessons that shook my soul
changed false to true
held me during turbulent loss
with connections I felt mattered
the earth beneath me seemed to shatter
yet you stood next to me unmoved.

love cannot be defined
with all things perfect there is only time
realizing everything was always fine
even before you came to my life
to open my eyes, heart, and mind
some will be left behind
truth is our only guide.

Honor is all mine
for accepting this journey 
through this world and beyond
with all of your being
you gave me peace of mind.

-Namaste

Symphony





Details | Free verse | |

Light in My Dark

They want me to be angered, they want me to hate,
You've hurt me bad, but I still wait.

I don't want to see you hurt or in pain,
You don't seem to care, I guess it's all in vain.

With you, I cannot be angry and I'll always remain true,
I love you too much to ever hurt you.

I have and always will forgive your every mistake,
Losing you is something I just couldn't take.

No matter the pain, no matter the cost,
Through it all, love for you I've never lost.

Seeing you happy is the light in my dark,
I just pray my fire may light a spark.

If you find joy and love in the arms of another,
If you love only her, if there is no other,

Then to you I wish happiness that will never end,
Even though every day, with her, you'll spend.

I wish nothing but the best for you and those you love,
I hope you find a match that fits like a hand in a glove.


Details | Free verse | |

Despite Your Demise

I will trek the hard route just to see your ghost appear
Even though I don’t believe in ghosts, 
I do believe that you thrive in this human heart
When I lost you, most of me have broken down
Most of me fell into a pit of pity…
You’re a loss that means so much to me
Your loss put a big impact on me 
You’re mighty strong…
Despite your demise

Your eyes has lost its shine
You don’t see…your eyelids are locked in place
Don’t deny the fact that you’re still mine
You don’t know me…don’t whisper your goodbye 
‘Cause we’ll see watch other face to face 
I’m trying to keep pace…
But my mind is racing with several thoughts all at once
It’s hard to catch them by the tale…
Your face is pale…
My tears shower down like bitter hail! 
This isn’t the end…
There’s no need to say goodbye…
Don’t say goodbye…or I’ll cry
Due to your demise

Ripped apart by your absence
I ponder about the times we cherished with each other 
I faced the truth already – I need to believe it, though I think it’s nonsense
I fade away, only to find…only to find that I’m blind…
This extreme fear bottled up inside needs to be released right now
Open your eyes – I need your sympathy, not your pity!
Widen your mouth – speak through me!
My soul has strayed too far 
I wander through the maze of your outlandish mind
We’re placed in the same car…
The truth is…hidden beneath the surface
It’s somewhere safe…not controlled by the abyss
Throw away your distress and confess
To me your reason to live with me…I need not to see your demise
Your demise…I’m not ready to see it or believe it…
I don’t care if I SOUND UNWISE…
I still hear your heartfelt cries…
Despite your demise

Hold on to me, dear…

I know you can make it through this tribulation

Talk to me, have no fear…

I’m here…to hear you speak your mind – express your frustration

I can relate to you – I really can!
Man, I feel you so much…just keep reminding yourself:
“I think I can…
I think I can…
I think I can…
Do it if I put my mind to it”

That’s the spirit! That’s what I’m looking for
So, don’t forlorn…there’s more hope in store
So no more! Please no more
Feeling down and emotionally sore
Speak your mind; I listen some more!

I need to get over the thought of losing you…
Could you help me think it through?
I have hope that we'll be together once more, despite your demise
Don’t you see…that I’m foolish, not wise!


Details | Free verse | |

Heart Light

She made the ultimate sacrifice,
A payment in flesh for untold sins.
A gentle voice can be deceiving, 
Her strength is hidden by the softest touch. 
The theft of her dreams has left all her tomorrows empty,
And still she waits to see the color of magic. 
Guided by the light of a pure heart, 
And surrounded by the song of an innocent soul.


Details | Free verse | |

The methadone girl

She could hardly drag himself along,hovered between life and death,
so frozen that her hands are insensible to any feeling
and atrophied heart works only for the casual trade.
Plucked at hair with rage as these morning habits die hard,
spiting blood,residues of the night before.
You toiled in vain because you think you've met her several times
and your soul finally realized your ambitions.
But she is the methadone girl.
The cheap shoes worn out,trampled underfoot by the crowd,
wasted by the long illness,languished from indifference.
Dice with her life everyday,the perspective of sadness,
gain nothing or something in her mind,
watching you to keep your reputation free from all slurs
The drainage happened at the age of eighteen
only dent in her pride was forever.
Fool her with promises,exchange arms and legs with money,
skin burns easily so be an animal,defy the pressure-gauge.
Rolling on souls again.
Overawe us into the silence.
The silence of methadone.


Details | Free verse | |

HELP

To help is to be alive
to lift when someone has fallen
to shine when it is dark
to be hope when all is lost
All these are help, and are remembered by those who witnessed. 
A smile can change a life, never underestimate your power, and your power over the world.

So when its needed . . . 'help


Details | Free verse | |

Right On, Righteousness

By the truths of
Judah
I never thought I'd
be
Thinking on it
backwards
As I rarely often
need

The journey started
somewhere
In a daydream of a
night
They took everything
away from me
Except my innocence
of life
Now I have a slight
Gift of the
righteous
Put it to good use
As I'm battling the
mindlessness

Now the thousand
army of Lucy
Come to wring my
neck
Slipping through the
shadows 
Have to watch my
every step
For if I fall in
The lightbringer
will
Soon be dead
As the righteous 
inherit their
kingdom
when it comes to be 
that it resides
inside their head



Details | Free verse | |

Serenity Blooming

To know with full certainty

That the path you tread

Is of your own free will



To see with sudden clarity

Astray you were lead

And the destiny you fill



To be yourself again

No bonds to impair

Knowing where you’ve been

Letting down your hair



Your beautiful new wings spread

To dry in the early morning sun

Distant memories wipe away the dread

Standing your ground, no need to run



Blossoming in a garden fair

Laughter comes lightly to your lips

Spirit renewed and heart repaired

Wonderful futures within your grip.



Rlm


Details | Free verse | |

Throwing In The Towel

The time has come 2day,
to go our seperate ways.
Much can be said,
but little will we say.
When was right,
or who was wrong?
Is a different tune,
but same old song.
Tears have been shed,
and blood has been bled,
now is the time to clear our heads.
For better and for worst we'll raise our child,
hoping their will be less frowns and more smiles.
I've gone more than the extra miles,
Now God has given me the courage,
to throw in the towel.
I quit I give up chasing that dream,
and living a nightmare,
and the thought of us to bare,
I no longer wish a life to share.
I'm letting go of all and hope for the best.
Before my heart explodes out my chest.
The other day I stared at death!
While the angels in heaven held their breath.
It wasn't my time to go though.
It was only my time to grow slow.
Many days I tried.
Many times you lied.
I forgave you everytime, but only after I cried.
But now I march to a different beat.
Before I lay myself to sleep,
Before I end up six feet deep.
Before my love ones weap.
Before I'm too weak to press forward.
Before I no longer can speak.
We played the games way too long!
When was right who was wrong?
Now I march to a different song.
I guess it wasn't meant to be.
I guess I was meant to see.
That you are totally diiferent than me.
We tried to make it work time after time.
But failed miserably.
I wish the best to the both of us!
May God grant the strength when the roads are tough.
The time has come to say goodbye,
As a New life I say hello.
As the new year approaches I make new vows.
As old ones have been erased and replaced
Finally Now I'm Throwing in the Towel!
 


Details | Free verse | |

RISE ABOVE IT

Selfish accusations align the walls
while the honest roof crumples to the floor-
and you're on the skyscraper ledge,
debating to jump
yet you don't have capability
to lose what you've created.
You can't escape even if you jump
cause the lies twist the noose a bit tighter.
And after every inch towards the ledge, you're faced with your own disaster.
Buildings collapse
chaos erupts
and flashing back -
you reach out and pierce my back.
The slow steady kind-
where the dagger peels into the flesh,
separating veins,
scooping up any flesh you want as your own.
And when you realize you've had enough pleasure
you trample over my lifeless body
and do it all over again.
When will the lies stop
and when will your words be revised,
thought upon and regretted.
Better yet,
when will you grow up
and reap your own guilt
instead of running around blaming me for all of your selfish problems.
With one more tug at the noose,
and one last sentence from you
I salute your unnecessary drama,
I salute all the hurt you've caused.
Because though I broke your heart-
I didn't break your pride.


Details | Free verse | |

tinkering saga

when we fall from our idle tongues
to the traveling tracks of virgin drums
and conclude our moist lips,
to the odorous of angelic bird-songs.
all to be our own little tinkering saga,
sailing over the alpha and omega.
chance evident if innocent,
loose hands trickle the magnificent,
as the spider spins and spins her cobweb
to catch the stars of pure hearts
so they can everlastingly shine and be tied
and be cited by those who lost their steed,
for they loved with swords on duckweed.
so if you glimpse skyward to assert,
may all burdens and afflicts avert
that the tinkering saga can exert to concert,
in your heart, so all can be beautifully art
and you can depart blithely from tears
to the stars of pure hearts.


Details | Free verse | |

Forgive me, father, for I have sinned

Forgive me, father, for I have sinned
I have stripped dead Papa of his fingers
And thrown him like Romulus himself.
'Your sins are forgiven; go in peace.'
 
Forgive me, father, for I have sinned
Many men have died so I may clutch Salem,
I wonder has any land soaked more blood
I wonder could a land be less Holy.
'Your sins are forgiven; go in peace.'
 
Forgive me, father, for I have sinned
I confined them for two centuries
and locked them in in darkness.
'Your sins are forgiven; go in peace.'
 
Forgive me, father, for I have sinned
I have let my force make clean children
dirty
I have told those who need to,
not to protect themselves, and they die.
 
Forgive me, father, for I have sinned.
'Forgive me, Father, for I can not, you have sinned too much,'


Details | Free verse | |

Tomorrow Will Come

My mind is spinning around like the world at its axis
Exit Egypt and surround yourself with life, not the dying world around you
The sky is as gloomy as my bedroom...I've kissed the abyss
How can you mend this heart when it submitted to evil practices?
Hunt down the frustration and put it in chains...it's not you...
It's not you...devouring filthy rue
Devouring the fire of malice...
The Earth is deceiving...and full of people that are callous
Embrace true bliss...don't be a slave to hopelessness
Don't be a slave to this emotional mess
You gottah get up and try your best to pass the test
Share with me your heart's desire
We share a bountiful future...we aren't feeding the fire
Freedom is at our front door
Forlorn no more
Forlorn no more
Tomorrow will be kinder and Tomorrow will be our lucky day
Tomorrow will reveal the shadows in hiding
Tomorrow will be a promising day and it will forever stay
Tomorrow will conceal the lies, it's slowly subsiding
Pull out that bad tooth... 
Let us marry the truth
Whenever I arrive home, 
He says to me that I’m not alone ever as long as I pray to Him persistently 
He wants to hear my voice in the night…in the break of dawn 
I’ll listen to His truth in the bible and not give credit to any other source
He’s not the last resort…that I lastly look upon
I’ll glisten in the moonlight ‘cause I’ve obeyed Him and haven’t got out of course 
I never wished to have a divorce
With His knowledge, His traits, His Words, lighting me up with hope, not remorse
Not remorse…of course!
I’m not a failure or a homesick sailor
For, you’re a gift, not a curse
Though I might feel like a downright failure
You’re a gift, nothing worse
Nothing worse…my beloved shepherd
I have heard Your voice in the middle of the night
My heart once pounded with fright..
You’re a miracle, not bad luck
You’re a miracle, not a bad report
You’re a gift, not a fake buck
You’re a miracle, and I rely on Your support
You’re a gift, not a curse
You’re a gift, not a curse
You’re a gift, nothing worse
You’re nothing close to a curse
I’m hinting that you’re the light at the end of the tunnel
If You weren’t there, rescuing me nonstop, I would’ve been in a worse
Situation… A terrible, terrible situation – I would’ve been in appall  
I would’ve fell into a lot of trouble…but thank God I’m not a beach ball,
Getting thrown back and forth just for their own pleasure
But, You’re beyond measure…beyond measure
You’re a gift as mentioned in this heartfelt verse 
Tomorrow will come someday!


Details | Free verse | |

Hope for Utopia

          Utopia, Casa de las Madre,
these four walls that close
         round flesh and bone, exclaim:
"...it is the breaking of the body,
and the spilling of blood...",    is it not
       that which means sacrifice?
    means love?
                            means life?
Family brought together in embrace
       of pain and prayer, I say:

'God, I am only as good as you,
             and being as you are, I can't
                       regret my birth (having played no part),
                                                     but live only with belief:
                                  that my home can once house my heart 
                                                                                          in peace.


Details | Free verse | |

Why hast thou forgotten...

Children of Adam...
why hast thou forgotten
reverential love besoughten ?

Upright ye walk,
but now downtrodden
foresaken art thou due allotted...

Material pleasures hamper thee
render thee,I so implore,
explore,absorb this natural splendor
temporary vanities beauty,
...memories acclaimed adore,
trees doth beareth fruit aplenty
water floweth wholesome freely
honey sweetened colors bloom
silken lustre natures loom....

What must be done
dear children of Adam,
why hast thou forgotten ?




Details | Free verse | |

My Children Part 2

May I be brave for them 
May I lead the way running barefoot in the rain
May I sing to them always
May I give to others
May I teach them to love
May I chase butterflies with them
May I laugh and make them laugh
May I not cause them to cry
May I show them wisdom
May I teach them kindness
May I demonstrate strength
May I show them how to forgive
May I make them feel loved... 
Appreciated, accepted, unique
May I show them that they are special in my heart,
May I be strong and keep holding on for them
And when things go astray… 
May I pray to keep moving on
When my feet won't budge, 
May I still try to be strong
For my spirited little soldiers, my children
May I be not weak, stand up and speak for the right and exercise patience
May I continue to believe, never letting go of my hope
May my faith keep me going, for my children
May I dance, whenever I have the chance to
Then they will see how beautiful this life can be
How glorious are the trees, how wonderful are the streams
Oh my Children, how beautiful life can be


Details | Free verse | |

Be My Friend

We have bad thoughts
So many times we have fought
Instead of realizing what we shared
A bond that can never be broken
No matter how bad things get
We can always come to each other
Trust and compassion will be there
Until the very end
Please will you still be my friend...

For The Only One That
Has Dealt With Me For
So Long: Rene

P.S.
I never realized that I aways had you until now, 
Please don't leave me alone...


Details | Free verse | |

Living the Dream

I am living the dream.
I stand here today,
Cannot believe what I am about to say,
But I am living the dream.
At times, it's tough
And it is not always easy.
I might be condemned
For choosing this path in life;
Some may think it's too bag of a risk.
When we give it our all,
Our passion and our might,
We can overcome and forget the fear
To become who we are meant to be.
I stand here today,
Another tear ready to wipe away:
You can do all you aspire to do!
Set your mind and never give up!
If I can do it,
You can too!
I can't believe I'm about to say this,
But I am living my dreams.
I am living the dream.


Details | Free verse | |

Stand Up And Fight {Poetry In Motion}

a womans humanity remains strong
regardless of the victimization
simply stand strong to opposition





Tribute To Abused Woman
Never Give Up The Fight


Details | Free verse | |

I Made It This Way

As time passes
So do all the new things you learn
	Unable to watch you grow
Hurts more than  I can handle
Pain so deep
Hidden within
	Fighting its way to the surface
Wanting to explode
My heart  never  as whole
	As it did the day I held you in my arms
Looking back at me
Your innocent eyes
So precious ~ So pure
	Perfect little baby
My perfect baby boy
How can you forgive me
Letting you go
	My son
Never know how much mommy loves you
	Replays in my mind over and over again
Why you’re gone
Reality of it all
Mommy let you go
  Gave up on what I was born to do…
	Have
Love and protect you 
All the wonderful things mommy was supposed to do
HATE ME
Kills me inside
	Leaves me numb
Realize ~ I didn’t choose you
When all you needed was me
		FAILED
I failed at what God blessed me with
  Baby boy
		Sorry
I miss you everyday
Want to lie down
	Just die
Cold
     Dark
           Alone inside
I made it this way
My baby
	Not you….


Details | Free verse | |

SHE FOUND LOVE

Under this tree she finds love

In this love, she finds hate

Whilst in hate,

Along creeps in fate

Hand-in-hand with fate,

Love begins to lose taste

Slips gently again into hate,

Love spreads its' wings too late

Across the fine lines of her face,

Bitterness draws more lines without space

More lines of distrust, hate,

An unwanted race with fate

Swiftly swooped away to look up,

She takes a quick gulp

Her smiles mixes with uncertainties,

Heaven smiles back with pity

Fate pulls away hate,

Love melts on her heart

She slips back under the tree,

Where she found love.

 

                         "THOUGHTS OF A POETESS"

                                    NEOFLOETRY


Details | Free verse | |

Shadows

Here I go the same road I've been traveling on for years. 

My life is so-so how I live it is up to me.

 But I keep on thinking and I keep trying to 
break out but I know that these shadows follow me where ever I go.

 I turn the corner, I look behind myself again. Something is following me and some how I 
can't pretend.

 What do you want from me? Is it what I have to scream to get you to go 
away.

 I'm running fast now my feet are barely touching the ground, and I don't know 
where I am anymore... i'm lost in my shadows.

 No one can hear my voice i'm screaming so loud my throat is cracking. I'm surrounded by 
darkness wondering when this will end? I hear footsteps walking behind, I turn but I 
don't see.

 I still hear the footsteps they are so close now I can't breath. 

When will this go away, Why can't this thing just run away? I turn around, and to my 
surprise I see a shadow the same image I've been trying to run away from. 

One thing I've learned is that it will return no matter how far you run and the sky gets 
dark and it will chase you until fyou confront your shadow.


Details | Free verse | |

In The Future Looking Back

In the future looking back,
You'll be happy to see
How far you've come
And where you are today,
So make the most of this now.


Details | Free verse | |

Sobrieties Wall

Countless tales told across the sobriety wall
names and dates,memories and remembrances
marked in the here and now upon the white brick wall.
Most sobering to look upon
more so when comprehension is awakened
by the meaning within the words.
To understand the everyday evils
those upon the wall have faced when dealing with drink.

Death to some a most blessed relief
to others,the torments lived everyday can mean
that rock bottom comes more and more frequently
...with each passing day.
To block out ones most painful memories
...the hoped for end.
To dull the pain felt,whether
...real or imaginary.
To appease the demons harbored within
so to quiet their restless destructive nature.
This and so much more is sought after by those
whose lives have been in constant battle with the bottle.

Words of encouragement/sadness to remember
...pain, joy, regret!
all expressed upon the wall.
The spaces fill rapidly at times, slowly other times
colors upon the wall help to tell the stories
some colors most vibrant, some most somber
dull and lifeless like the lives expressed by the 
...very ones who painted them.
One thought, the line most poignant
...and noticed above all others!
"Never give up hope".
Are words to remember and to live by.l


Details | Free verse | |

Memoir of Goliath




In the habit of teasing, 
she sometimes told him 
that she wished he didn't come. 
But she always invited him. 
Goliath took solace in that, 
accepted her invitation 
knowing how it was issued.

In spite of everything, 
the years in one place, 
Golliath always wondered 
where he lived. 
The child of badness, 
the bully in his heart,
swallower of pride,
he had stood in front of minions 
who adored him, then failed them 
and didn't die or vanish. 
He walked from the 
site of his misdeeds head cast down, 
not wanting to be seen. 
He didn't hide. 
just slipped away 
not un-noticed but shunned.


Details | Free verse | |

It's Not A Cult

It's not a cult:
It's a Savior saving my life.
It's a Savior saving your life.
It's our Savior saving our lives.
It's not too late.
It's never too late!


Details | Free verse | |

Choices

Stay now with me , and listen to my sighs,
Bidding me to drain the curse and know it all.
	Feigned that I spake ill of thee,
As to who beholds two currents thwart amid
	the fluctous profound.

	Pass , pass upon your way , for 
I grow never old...and townward take to their
	whirring flight. That o'er the green 
cornfield did pass as I trembled.
Remarking how ill we are ; all 
		dissembled.
Hands, that the rod of empire might have 
swayed, in one long yelllow string wound.
	Tell how they lived and died
not heeding to the blight.
	Dying in distant music, even as it came...
upon the fated night ,  gloomy encompassing 
	thee around.
And in the green underwood and cover, up ,
	from the mystic play of shadows twining
and twisting as if they were alive...
	Mindful the while that thus time flies for you,
That I myself was not more whimsical. Burning
	more truely as it dwells, than 
where the lights scatter amid two voices.
	And all else is silent & perfect
with my choices.


Details | Free verse | |

Chapter 12 Annihilation

The Tragedy of Humanity is the Monoku of us failing to believe you
Is This Greed be ye Acrostic for not knowing the Gnostics 
Molding Most be the boast in Senryu saying you can’t tell me what to do
Excommunicating Faith is a Tanka for those who sank 
Insanities Calamities in this Enclosed Ryhme regarding to our binds
Sinful Are These Ways considers what we forgot in this Rubaiyat
No Righteousness In a Senryu for those who forgotten about you
Oligarchies Creating Hate in each and every state be in Enclosed Ryhme 
Worshiping Vanities is a Lanterne telling you to burn
Ruthless Deceptions be a Fibonacci trying to drown the mariachi
Evil Enemy Tricks informs of a constructive fraud in Ballade
Trouble Moving is trouble grooving to chime in this Enclosed Ryhme
Roadside Utilities you see they are a bank of put in Tanka
Indestructible Ye told Ottava rima, praying you have the mind of
But Backsliding means deciding what zone told in Canzone
Unruly Child is for the minds of you told in Haiku
Truth Be Insight be an Ottava rima about the main man Prima
Inclined Minds is another Ottava rima about the change of time for Ye
Opportunities There Be in this Senryu don’t you see
No Matter is about the chatter in an Enclosed Rhyme for you to find
Death Be A Lady This Night ask which way is right Ottava rima
Introduction Which Leads To Reduction a Nonet seduction
Sexual Acts Meant To Distract be the private zone Canzone
Turmoil That We Struggle With is a chime in Enclosed Rhyme
Redefining Ones Plight be Ottava rima telling you to fight
Instilled In Ye Is Light another Nonet so that you don’t forget
Believing Wrong or Right asks this Enclosed Rhyme the real war crime
Undertaken Be Ye is a new flight zone told in Canzone
Transcendent In Flight is the alteration told in Alliteration
Inner Subconscious Intelligence universal relevance in Name
Outside This Reality which is for you to do discern told in Lanterne
New To Old Experience is an Enclosed Rhyme we all mime
Nay Sayers Deny Greatest Fear in Acrostic about ye the agrestic
Over Energy Transfer is Canzone about the unknown
What Will You Do is just asking you in Haiku?


Details | Free verse | |

Be and be

Be the first to lead
First to land and last to leave
Give forth fruit and seed
At night you doubt; now you believe
Morning came, and you were freed.

Be the lost to the world
Last to wound and first to breathe
Tugged, drawn and hurled
At junction you ask: answer with you
Healing came, now you stand tall.

Be the mighty,
Never in arms and answer the call
Listening for the plea, look... it is done
At silence you baulk; stillness now
Stillness in which to know.


Details | Free verse | |

tides are risen from tears of love

when oceans rise beyond
the beaches, and 
it seems like the 
sky is leaking
water that fills 
the sea
above its very limits
and when those
tears stop falling
from the sky
where they fell 
the only place
that is the waters
edge is the mountain
that you land on.


Details | Free verse | |

The saga of the dusty road

The Saga of dusty roads of Utah 
(To the memory of Don W. Esplin, father of Kathryn Esplin-Oleski)
= =
There he was playing with some mild explosives, 
in his own backyard, a resolute boy he is; 
the June month had swelled like the taut belly of 
a neighborhood lady; the boy wanted to be 
a scientist which he became. He, of course could not 
envision that all these sepia dust of Utah, 
the noon backyard and a young scientist’s narrative 
would be remembered by his explosive daughter 
and a strange Indian was going to pen a saga. 

Alfred Nobel was smiling from a page of a book 

The boy rolled a cigarette, the smoke’s curlicues 
swirl up to grain the picture. A blast almost choked
the bright blue jays and robins. Defused sun slanted.
The end of the road was just an end of the road 
where sun could meet earth, warm grass shook off the heat 
and the covert window of the farm house would yield 
a father and son talk. Strong argument on
future, on an university, on money 
on a world that could differ in generations;
of course the boy, as a father, understood 
his girl, then living apart. But distance is in heart.
He would grow up midst dreams. A quirky wind would blow him 
here and there; navy, marriage and science, 
pharmacology and marriage again; a gust
of wind would take him on a ride that, if he could 
read this he would have said, resembled his truck rides 
down the roads of Utah. But at that point of time
he was wide awake inside his misty night’s sleep 
and an American novel is shooting up 
its multiple heads in search of fresh oxygen. 
The waves of moon were enjoying a full tide.

=© 2009 - All Rights Reserved Kushal Poddar


Details | Free verse | |

What I Meant To Say

What I meant to say was...

I'm sorry, and
I miss you,
And I forgive you and I hate you
I meant to tell you that I want to work it out 
between us,
And it could never work between us, 
because
There's this thing between us,
Though you have my whole and soul
I listen for your whisper at night,
All day,
I sickly dread crossing paths
I promise you I meant to talk to you again,
Unless I got in my way
I cry to you, at you, sometimes for you
But nevermore in front of you
You've made me stronger than that, though
I do love you
I meant to tell you that you're scum

What I meant to tell you was that
I can still feel your love
Your lies
Your kiss
Your sighs
The quiet way you left me in the night
Or the messy way I ripped you from my side
Your wish to die
Your guilt, my guilt, my lies
Nevermore I want to cry

What I meant to say is I'm drawn to you
For love of danger, or neglect
Not for love of myself (or is it?)

What I meant to say is that I love you,
But I choose me.


Details | Free verse | |

Daddy

I have never felt so much love burn in my heart
because nobody has ever lived up to your love for me
and nothing in this God-forsaken world could falter how I feel for you

I let you in on my darkest of secrets
yet instead of peering at me with disappointment
you look into my tear-filled eyes with everything I don't deserve

At my worst moments in life
you not only stood behind me, but held me up with your reassurance

your courage never fails to astound me
all the while, it never falters

you are my crutch when I'm broken
and my sunshine when life dims to darkness

what in my life have I ever done to deserve one such as you?

as I lay contently in your arms, as I did when only a fragile infant
I feel your unconditional love for me

you are my star, my shoulder, my idol, and the best friend I could have ever hoped for

though I love you with all of my being
you always seem to trump it with your own voluptuous heart

never leave me, Father
and I'll do all I can to make you proud...for eternity


Details | Free verse | |

Twinkling Souls

Sitting alone in a hotel room
Looking out over flat roofed buildings
At twinkling lights across the Island.
How many lights?
How many people?
Sitting alone in their rooms?
Looking out.
Alone.
Searching.
Despairing of finding ourselves.
Fearful of discovery
That I am Me.
Who is dying?
Slowly but slowly we all surely will.
Choice is everything.


Details | Free verse | |

Very few remains

Very few remains

It's easy to reclaim,
The stones that have been thrown.

Harder to turn the other cheek,
When everything seems meek.

It's easier to pretend,
When there's nothing left to mend.

A melody in time,
A world of unheard chimes.

The secret we all hold,
Yet very few unfold.

Will my bleeding eye go unnoticed?
(Sigh) Forget the pain....Bring on the chains!


Details | Free verse | |

A piece of wisdom

Don't forget to thank your enemies for making you a better person.


Details | Free verse | |

TO KNOW Quotes by Anna Lo P

"Knowing is far much better than not knowing at all,
Knowing the worse it gets, the better it will be.
It helps one to get through bad times as easy."

-twitted in Twitter account

(My follow-up Tweet on this):

"Knowledge of the balance takes away your reasons
to be mad, sad, hate, worry envy, be disappointed.
It frees all negative emotions and feelings."


Details | Free verse | |

Tell Me Our LoVe Is Not LoSt Among The MidNight Sky

MidNight comes faded beneath my feet,
All is gone above loyalty, love n'
Trust.

What have I done?? Can I regain
The love once lost baby please 
Don't go.

Here you leave me in darkness,
Take my hand and lead me back
To the burning fire.

Among you're eye's that once
Sparked our love so bright, towards
The sun these Tears I Pule
shamelessly.

Tell me I haven't lost you...
I couldn't bare it! Tell me 
You haven't given up??

Please don't leave, my love is:
Still true and pure since the day
We first met.

You mean so much to me, I swear
My love is on A thin line with;
You..I need to know that your
Love still survives,Through me.

Tell me our love is not LoSt among 
The midnight sky.. I honestly love
You!!! Truly no LIES... Baby!! All is
Lost with~out you.


Details | Free verse | |

More Room In Heaven



Heaven...

Have you ever traveled to the garden
finding the most precious flowers
who bloomed in a thorny crown
through out the land of ours?

Have you heard the lagoon
with roaring passion and anger
as it weeps to the silver sand
holding back many of its danger? 

If you have not then you haven't seen-
The home for the good and angels.
Yes- its Heaven and I think I've been
there before, watching lovely things swing and dangle.

And I've heard the lord's voice,
not so deep and pitchy as the wind.
He said, "Let the people know that
there's more room to grow in Heaven."



Details | Free verse | |

Rites of Passage

I write right rites for I dare not get them wrong and if I do I promise you forever will I be one with the darkness that enters strong to take over my faith everything I've ever known to be will quickly be erased I don't think I'd make it that doesn't make me weak no one has crossed over and made it back without scars that can be seen I would rather be with a conscious free of guilt always inviting who I find mighty into the temple I have built I enter my own creation and take a look around to fix the flaws or scrap it all rebuild it on solid ground the morale can be found even in ignorance I admit I'm slightly jealous by your smiles of wild bliss is it really that easy to never give a care for any other person or thing but the reflection behind your stare I wish I knew my limit for then I could plan my life but the constant of the mystery is the source that fuels my might in a moment of clarity I see how small I am so let me back away with face before you know how far I can stretch my imagination a universe inside is born it only lasts for seven minutes before I destroy it with my scorn I'm a danger to myself all my lies are white I will soon unleash the godhead to rectify that one forsaken rite


Details | Free verse | |

Because Anger Surfaces to Breathe

				                

This anger grows inside cavities of the soul,
It lives there,
Only to surface for air to keep it alive,
It comes from deep dark abyss’s and floats on oceans of the body,
Not often, or perhaps frequently it makes its presence known,

It cuts those close to it with razor sharp words,
It eats away at the heart slowly like a fungus,
It is a seed that sprouts from the bottom of bellies,
A clinging vine that takes over the inside of the body and the mind,

It is the controller of every movement,
Our legs, our arms, our hands, our sex organs, our heads, and are mouths belong 
to it,
We all know it well,
Children, adults, and the elderly know who put it in them,

It creates many paths in this life,
Some will travel to the gates of their heaven,
Some will travel to the gates of their hell,
Some will travel nowhere and limbo will be their best friend,

Anger has many faces,
It has the face of grief laid out under the desert sun dry of every tear,
It has the face of resentment, running like a raging bull,
It has the face of pain, like death reaching for life with wide eyes, 
It has the  face of injustice, and lady justice walking away laughing without her 
scales,

Why must it live?
We know were it comes from,
We know what keeps it alive,
It murderer’s the true anima,
A fury, that imprisons life. 


Details | Free verse | |

A good enough Apology

Undeniably tired
Dark circles under his eyes
Lips still in a straight line
Devoid of happiness
Just too tired
Tongue like daggers

Understandably hurt
Tears fall from her eyes
Lips quivering and chewed
Lack of inner light
Confused by hurt
Words spoken like down feathers

So f*cking tired
Three beers gone
8%...9.5%....11%...
Starting to be able to sleep
His eyes closing gently
Forget everything else

Scared of an argument
Sneaks back into bed
1...2...3...breath slowly
lays her head on his chest
heart beating, eyes closing
fingers splayed on warm skin

Eyes open slightly
Without the need to
He feels her familiar shape
Arms wrap tight around her
Peaceful sleep
Good enough for an apology


Details | Free verse | |

Freedom Has a Cost

(still in the editing universe of epicness)

You vanished from my sight
I’m feeling this sorrow…this neglect already
I will decide to move on today or tonight
I will soon be ready
To run the extra mile
With you for a while
Just smile and be with me
Till the end, we’ll be together in unity

Bring us back strength, vigilance and peace and be confident – you’re the 
dazzling light, surviving the plight of nightfall and being crowned as the 
champion, combating against the grief-stricken, abstract abyss…making slow 
progress
Shimmering with inner inspiration, shining bright like the stars in a single 
bouquet, now scattered about in the midnight sky, coiling in the current of the 
ebony, velvet sky

You vanished from my sight
I’m feeling this sorrow…this neglect already
I will decide to move on today or tonight
I will soon be ready
To run the extra mile
With you for a while
Just smile and be with me
Till the end, we’ll be together in unity
You vanished from my sight
I’m feeling this sorrow…this neglect already
I will decide to move on today or tonight
I will soon be ready
To run the extra mile
With you for a while
Just smile and be with me
Till the end, we’ll be together in unity

We’re spiraling down and I’ve sworn from the bottom of my heart that I won’t 
break our friendship oath
I’m soaring like the falcons, soaring at the beach, feeling the sunset’s warmth 
on their feathery bodies – my fate is to take flight – don’t dampen my wings 
just ‘cause you’re the one that’s gravity-bound –Sh! Hush now… don’t make a 
single sound…


Details | Free verse | |

I can't bear to be perfect anymore

I always knew something about you would fade.
Your words never could reach my soul,
But they ripped my heart in half.
With every being of who you are you tired,
And tired but it never worked.
And who I am seems to be frowned upon,
Time and time again.
I was never enough for you,
And someday you'll move on to something great,
To someone greater.
And we're gonna grow apart,
One day I'll see you somewhere and remember you.
You'll be a married man and far past us,
And it won't matter to you.
It'll still scar me and even if right now
I appear as the stronger one, it won't be like this forever.
I'm breaking down on the inside, I just don't show it.
And you don't know the control you have,
I just had to write you this so you would know,
That I'm moving on' and letting go,
Even though I don't want to.
You'll keep going about your life,
And keep regretting me like you have been,
And I've never regretted you.
I feel like I've been pushed down,
Pushed down, cut and pushed into the dumpster.
The sadness is this is no longer a poem.
This isn't a work of art,
This is a sad way of writing a letter to a lost friend,
A lost friend who shouldn't be lost. 
A lost friend who should still be mine.
But I'll give you my acceptance of moving on when it feels,
While it feels unbearable. And I've lost you.
Odds against me, I doubt I'll ever have you again.
I've never been enough for you,
And I can't bear to try to be perfect anymore.
I can't feed you the lies so I'm enough for you.
I guess I'll always be imperfect,
And unable to be yours.
Hopefully you aren't always lost;
Love and leave,
Joy and tears,
Mine and gone,
One day we'll see.


Details | Free verse | |

The Ultimate Sacrifice

Scorned by friends,
Betrayed even by your own body as it	
     Broke
     Tore
     Bled
     Died, and
Rejected last by the one closer than yourself.


Details | Free verse | |

Please forgive me

I've never felt this way???
Not one single day!
This feeling is ripping me apart;
Am I breaking my own heart?
Harsh words written....
I only know I'm smitten!
My love, am I losing you?
All I do is make you blue!
I really do apologize,
go ahead, you can criticize!
I really didn't want to make you mad;
We both end up being sad!
For what I have done, I say sorry!
I really didn't mean to make you worry.
Please forgive me?
Never just let me be...
I don't ever want to lose you;
Because I really do love you!
If you leave me I will die,
and my heart will never stop to cry!


Details | Free verse | |

Permanent

Today I feel miserable. Not just your run of the mill sorrow, but it's as if my thoughts have morphed into blades
and sliced their way into my heart. My brain has imprinted your memories into my mind, too far deep to ever be retracted.
I've found peace within the pain, accepted it perhaps. Because even though it hurts to think of you, I can't stop.
Your soul will live on for eternity, and permanently in my heart.
Sometimes I pretend that you've never really left this earth. I see you often.
In my dreams, in strangers that roam the street, the ones with the same innocent blue eyes as yours.
I can still hear your laughter. It has been 247 days since I have physically been in your presence. 
247 days without answers, without closure, without...you.
Everything that led up to that day was despicable. You deserved gold, but received gravel.
But hatred is poisonous.
And if I allow anymore poison to slip into my blood, then I may be gone as well. So I will try to forgive, but can never forget.
I love you more than I love myself.


Details | Free verse | |

Sixty Minutes

Sixty minutes to make peace, 
not much time in the scheme of things.  
To ask forgiveness for all I've done, 
seems I shouldn't have tempted fate in the first place.  
I never should have taken the path, 
that leads to remorse and I'm sorry's.  
I just should have listened to my little voice.  
The Angel that tried to guide me.  
Perhaps I wouldn't be here at this moment, facing my mortality.  
The what if's can fry the mind. 
 But just one might have saved me.  
I leaned upon the tale I'd been told, 
that forgiveness is but a prayer away. 
But, when you have just thirty minutes left, 
you realize it's too late.  
I am luckier than some, I guess.  
That had the end happen in a blink.  
Never knowing, nor having the chance, 
to ask for their soul to be saved.  
With just thirty seconds, 
not much time for lengthy pleas.  
So I will just ask you to hear my last two words..
"Forgive me" 



For the contest:  MY Last Hour
Sponsored by Robb A. Kopp


Details | Free verse | |

Dream Collection 1 The Ultimate Decision

         Dreaming shows you many hidden things in your mind; it opens you to alternative thinking…
        Here I am, stuck, in the middle of it all, every day I face these things, alone. Once I find myself in-between a decision that is for better or for worse. It is a decision between happiness in another, and in myself. Before me I see to doors, both seem the same, but I know they are different. One the left I see my life without really living…
	This life is steady, stable, I take no risks, and it is boring. It is my life without her. I have always followed this road, and my mind has enjoyed challenging myself to school work, but today, my heart loathes for the love it never really had.
	On the right, I see the same door, but with a different outcome. I see my life with her, the path I am currently on. This life is one with the one I love. I don’t know if this would be a stable life, but it is a healthy life, full of risks, it is fun, and I know in my heart it is the life I want. I want both, but I know I alone cannot focus full attention on both, at the same time.
	So as I steer towards the right, because I want to be happy, I begin to enjoy my rather what used to be boring life. As time goes on I begin to realize that the choice is mine, I can life my own life. I try to make my own door, a middle door. I follow this path for a while, but every good thing must come to an end, I must choose, left or right.
	Worried I may have lost the right, I steer towards the right door, thinking I have made the right choice I go to open the door, but at the last moment I hesitate. I do want to be happy, but is this truly how I want to live? I feel stupid for doubting myself, I go to the left, I almost open the door but I hesitate again, which is the right choice? I don’t know what to do but then I do what every person must do, I listened to my heart, I move to the right, and open the door. I try to peer through to happiness, but I wake up. Why couldn't I choose sooner? Happiness in someone or happiness in myself? Someone to be with? Or someone to be? Unhappy with myself, I realize that either door was better than no door.
	I ask this question to anyone out there like me. How do you want to live your life? Happiness or happiness? Living day to day happy as I can be. Or living (most likely) alone, but stable. What is your decision, to the ultimate decision? I know now what I want to choose, and I choose her, but question goes both ways, does she choose me too?


Details | Free verse | |

Where's The Love

We were taught to shine bright,
But where's the light when we condemn?
Where's the light when we judge?
Where's the light when we don't love?


Details | Free verse | |

Change Myself

Take a long look at me,
I’m not who I used to be inside,
I’ve been changed by the world around me.
Erase me from your heart,
But don’t forgive me for all the damage I caused. 

I feel better off alone,
I’ve started believing,
I can’t go on like this.
And you ask what happened to my strength?
But now I’m begging for mercy to not answer that question. 

You say you used to think I was invincible,
But that was all a lie,
I’m just as frightened inside as I have ever been.
I feel like a page torn from a book,
Gliding through the wind weightlessly, 
But only to be sucked down into water,
And just as paper would fold up when dropped into water,
I feel like I am drowning myself slowly. 

If only it was easy to leave myself behind,
And change myself,
But how long can you wait for that?
I don’t want to see you alone,
So leave me in this hole,
Because that’s the only spot a monster like me belongs. 


Details | Free verse | |

blameless

There are those who
are doomed
to be ruled
by the moon's pull
while stars clash;
who are double crossed
by Venus and Mars.
Those who bleed
are those who need
but never learn.

And there are
those who burn
those who love
only in hell.
Old tragedies
played out in pain
betrayed, denied
denied again.
Those who are
blameless
take the blame.


Details | Free verse | |

If You Leave Me

              
That fragrant smell of you like jasmine,
When you are away, I don’t forget,
Do you forget mine?
The goodness of it I remember always,
I remember you,
Do I bring you goodness?
Will you remember me? 
A potpourri of dry flowers sit on your nightstand,
Waiting to be consumed by you,
If it talked, it would say I love you,
When you speak petals come out flowing,
When I listen to your words that drip to the floor,
I soak them up with my feet that have deep roots,
This, is completeness for me,
If you think to leave,
Then don’t come back,
I, will be gone too!
I won’t come back!
But, if you always love me,
Then, I will always love you,
If ever you should come to hate me,
I could never hate you,
I will lie down with crashing waves blanketing me,
Then, I will  be that sand particle floating effortlessly in the sea,
If you have killed your hate and look for me again,
Then look upon the fading sun in the horizon,
There, you will find me set free by the sea. 


Details | Free verse | |

Sweet loves confussion

Blue eye's looked into the night
A tear formed at the corner of his heart
A silent tear
A silent scar
 
A golden rose forever blue
golden virtue lost tonight
A silent though
past moments true

The rose sweet silent thorns
The scars sweet silent storms
Taste the power of thy love
Risk the violence of thy strife

Trust the broken heart of rage
Suffer then your silent cage
Blue eyes looked into the night
forgive that you might start again
 
The rose of love is still the same
A stranger to lifes guessing game
Should thee stay or should thee go
The thorns of love won't let you know

My heart knows pain, mistakes
Should I become the master of my lake
Should I test the rivers of the free
Love binds my life to thee

Sweet rose my heart
sweet love my life
pray that we can find the key
Improve our lives for thee and me

Yes transgressions, we have know
mistakes, bad seeds, have planted grown
The pain has torn us limb from limb
Now we must climb above our sins

Yet change the light of night time blue
build with trust the love we knew
relax the anger, fear let go
trust we'll find the way to grow


Details | Free verse | |

19

A searing pain
Shoots through my arm
As i pull the cold blade
Across the ivory of my flesh
I look at what i've done
And i see the bright red of living ecstasy
Letting it sit to gently cry
Slipping out of the throbbing flesh
I leave this worlds harsh reality
And find myself in my own mind
Where no one tries to see
What they cannot find in me
I felt alive!
Not dead inside
That blade made it happen
That highest of high
I enjoyed the great sight
But then the high died
It seemed my world
Became unfurled
As i realised what i did (again)
Another scar to add to life
Just as regretful as the last
The pleasure i persued
And the pain i let loose
Effected more than just me
It harmed the love of my life 
All because of my strife
That bottled up inside
I swore to him
I won't take my last breath
To lie down and sleep
For 100,000 years
I'll be here at your side
To see your warm smile
No matter how great the pain


Details | Free verse | |

OFFENSE2 -Quotes by Anna Lo P

"At the end, we must forgive those who offended us, whether the offense is really 
intended or merely perceived..because Love lies in us.." -twitted in Twitter account


Details | Free verse | |

A Young's Love

A fish in his own pride 
And agony up and down 
He jumps.

With a draw of desperation
Cover him with blue water and sand
Share day after day a young’s dream.

In many ways he tries
The summer’s sun went through
Wandering on behind the trees speaking love where have you brought me
An unseen soul replies and the young fisherman 
Let the fish to swim through it!


Details | Free verse | |

JOURNEY TO YOU

JOURNEY TO YOU

Darkness in my soul
It chills me
An eternity of mental anguish
Haunting me
I have lived this way 
For so long
That I accept it as normal~
Languishing without direction
The war within rages
I cannot see the enemy
But I know he’s present
I cannot hide nor escape
So I seek to pacify
To bargain with
This persistent adversary
Maybe he is not
So dangerous after all
Maybe he doesn’t even exist~
But the darkness persists
And I have to break free
From this suffocating oppression
I am dying…
I must breathe 
The air of freedom
HELP!
Help me God
To be free
It took me an eternity
To come to this place
And say
FORGIVE ME
I want to be 
Completely yours

mja


Details | Free verse | |

stella

the thoughts in this demented mind... the pain only heard in silent cries. her mask was brilliant, hiding her tormented soul. on the outside she was strong as a bull. compliments to her personality and optimism made it easier to accept the criticism. on the inside she was ridden with self hate it all made it harder just to wait.


Details | Free verse | |

love is pain

Where am I, how did I get here?
Waking up next to a girl I didn’t leave the club with
Does it matter? Why should I care?
It’s not the girl I’m in love with
Every week leaving the club with another hottie
I don’t want to do it, but enjoy it as I love her body
But I got a girl on my mind and I lust her heart
But I show no slowing down as I unhook her bra
But I sincerely hope she knows it’s just a one night stand
And she’s not part of my life plans
I’ll get called a waste of space, playa, and a flirt
But in reality I’m a guy in love who’s hurt
With a girl & he’s tired of all the mind games
So he’s slowly admitting she’ll never be his
I’m trying to find comfort so no one sees behind the pain
But it’s too hard to keep it as a secret
As the pain is substantial
He’ll end up paying the price when the problem isn’t financial
He wants to hold her, protect her and love her
But she won’t give him the chance to
Even though I’ve never cheated in my life
When in a relationship I’ve always been faithful
These tears I’m trying to keep them in my eyes
But I don’t know if I’m able
I tried to keep my distance
How did I fall for you?
Was willing to give my all for you
My feelings will most probably always stay true
But I’ll move on & become stronger like I always do
I guess my perfect picture
Will never display you


Details | Free verse | |

uncommon cure

tar it with a smile
suffocate the
color from its beat...
add feathers of forgiveness
drag it by the ID to the top of a cliff
feed it to the air
spin the prayer wheel
chant a prayer to the wind 
follow the tarry trail
back to the quiet canyon of your being
before entering
scrape the tarfeathers from your feet:
(an uncommon cure for a bolt cold heart)


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness

There it is again;
That word called forgiveness. 
We can't fight it.
We can't deny it.
We can't ignore it.
It has been done for us,
Now it is our time to do so for them.
Now it is our time to give it to them.


Details | Free verse | |

Father forgive them

I came to set the captives free 
I gave them a chance to see me
But they got it wrong, didn’t hear
The wonderful truth I came to share
Father forgive them they know not what they do

I tried to tell them the truth about love
But they shut their ears and walked away
Afraid of what this love would entail.
So they set out a plan to bring me down
Father forgive they know not what they do.

When Judas came with massed arms troupes
And on my face he placed his kiss.
They took me away and put me on trial.
They mocked me and beat me and said I must die
Father forgive them they know not what they do

When they led me away to the hill of death
And stuck cruel nails in my hands and feet
When they lifted my cross high in the sky
And jeered and taunted the king of the Jews
Father forgive them they know not what they do

As my hour draws near and darkness descends
The man next to me speaks his final plea
You are the son of God and when you’re in heaven
Please Lord please remember me
Father forgive them for they know not what they do

The sky grew darker and the pain increases
I now will take the whole sin of the world
This weight it engulfs me like a cloak.
My father’s eyes in sorrows turn away
And all I can say is father forgive them

The story of Easter is very well known 
And we marvel at Jesus for the words that he said
BUT WHAT WILL YOU DO NOW IT’S OVER AND DONE
How will you respond to this wonderful love?


Details | Free verse | |

Hero

To be a hero
To save a life
is this how one gets the title?

rush a burning building
or take a bullet
conquer the fight or flight

but the real hero,
is called a true friend
in the spirit of service

to help the hopeless 
find purpose and joy
to be a hero

to save a life.


Details | Free verse | |

Rose Relationship

It seems like our relationship was like those roses,
they were beautiful, full and made me smile just about everyday.
The beauty lasted longer than most bouquets do,
up to a week at and a half at least.
I felt it was a sign that we were meant to be
that we'd never split or grow apart.

That is where i was wrong i guess,
I was left in the dark, i was worried about you.
Then one night i stayed up to talk to you,
only to get no answer and see your 'single' stat.
It hurt so bad, I had felt a connection, i knew they were there,
But I still don't know what happened to us......

Everyone told me everything would be alright,
then morning came and it hit me all over again.
Then I realize it's all lies because I still don't know,
and you're still missing and without you something's missin' in my day.
It breaks my heart to not have you, to not know,
I'd do anything to talk to you, to fix what was lost.

I thought the world of you, reading and hearing your words,
made me the happiest on even the worst of days.
I try to listen to others  and not think about you,
but it's hardto do when you find the guy with an awesome personality.
The guy that makes you feel lucky to have and know,
maybe i'm being a fool, I am i was told, but I'll always have my heart open to you, 

Even if we are only Friends, I'll think nothing less of you my friends always mine.


Details | Free verse | |

Love Part 2

Forever, will I die for you
Forever, will I love you
I will love you forever
It may take that long
Before you finally stare right into me
And release me from this prison
I've made and lost the key to
It's hanging around your neck, love

While I hear you crying in your sleep again
I wrap you in my arms
And pray you feel me there again
It will be okay
I'll always be here, my sweet
I'll never leave
Years now, since you saw me last

You hold your reasons in your hand
Too many, though not enough
Gently, I come behind you
And kiss your neck
Whisper nothing
But surely it's enough
As you drop your reasons to the floor
Quickly stand and turn
I know you don't see me
Until you fly into my arms
Tears screaming from your heart
Words so lovingly hateful
I was right here
I'm still right here
I'll never leave
Please, believe
All I have, everything I am
Was right here, waiting for you
To see my light and wash ashore
Please, don't turn away again
Let's just stay here together
Forever tangled up in
Love


Details | Free verse | |

Dear Lord (For Michael Torres)

Dear Lord I thank you for another day clean & free
As you know Lord awhile back I received an email
One that has troubled me now for months
It contained an apology from another person
An apology I know wasn’t easy for him to write
One that was also very hard for me to read
Lord you know how hard I battle with anger
How much hate and anger once consumed and controlled my life
How I struggle to keep myself balanced
Lord you know that I know in my heart
I must forgive him
As I have been forgiven
I know to hold these feelings in my heart
Is a sin
So many people have forgiven and accepted me into their hearts
I owe this not only unto you
But to all those who have forgiven me
If I am not willing to forgive
Then I do not deserve to be forgiven
You know Lord I have to say
The way you use Antoinette to point these things out
And reason with me in a way that I must agree
Makes you a cold piece of work
And leaves me in a position
Where all I can say
Is Lord just as you have forgiven me
I reckon Michael too shall be forgiven


--------------------------------------------------------
This poem was written sometime back and it has
been a heavy burden round my neck ever since. 
What I did I did for all the right reasons in my heart
but it is apparent that Michael & Janice do love each
other so who am I to Judge. Well anyhow I must do
what I feel is right which is to forgive, God Bless, Mj
Seems to fit Christies contest very well so I'll enter
it in the contest.


Details | Free verse | |

Forgive me i'm sorry

I ask you to forgive me for i am not perfect
i've wasted tears on people who don't deserve them
i've wasted time on people who don't deserve it
but at the time i felt like i weren't worth them

the people i care most about i manage to hurt
and i sincerly apologise for that
until you lose them.you don't know how much the damage is worth
trying to wipe the tears from my eyes and laugh 

will i always crave the attention from my mother i never had?
will i always feel insecure from growing up in foster care?
went from self harming to writing my pain on a pad
will i always hate my family for never being there?

25/02/07 i was 15 my father died
asking myself if i'm heartless inside
cause i haven't shed a tear
i don't feel no different cause i never had him here

no pictures of my family.but walls covered in posters of Eminem
all of the sacrs and liquor sent me straight
trying not to relapse so i pick up my pen again
love and hate it can be hard to differentiate

i apologise to all of my future girlfriends
the break-up with Rebecca left me with a broke heart
i hate to admit it.but i loved her
so my future relationships will be affected by those scars

i moved on.still keep everyone at a distant
try and get close and i'll push you away
used my strength to overcome every obstacle
and have more than enough for today


Details | Free verse | |

Spoken Words

Spoken Words




Hurtful words relayed,
"Dislike"

Inopportune timing,
"Inconvenience"

Poor judgement displayed,
"Disappointment"

Opinions expressed,
"Substandard"

Choices made,
"Deserving"

The Unspoken word ...
"I'm sorry"


Details | Free verse | |

Winter Daze

As I gaze out upon the open sea
I am but bombarded with strife
for everything I touch dissolves away
I crash repeatedly on the ocean floor
surrounded by deafening beauty
The calmness almost evades my senses
as I am rushed and pushed upon the rocks
baffled by the omnious outlook of what is
and was a season of hatred known as my life
I am but doomed to drown in my own abyss
symbolic second only to the insurmountable
climb ahead of me
it would take an ocean to wash away my sins
and an ocean to cleanse me through
but as I pray for winter to approach
I finally realize winter has come early
for this is my winter daze.


Details | Free verse | |

My Father

I hear his voice

Grown old with my absence;

His powerful presence pale

And querulous no more.

Sad and searching words

Now come from his throat

Where the crescent scar, once madly red,

Lies faded like a wan, winter moon.

His frailty frightens me;

His rage more easily defended

Than this unfamiliar exigency.

My armor has no resistance

Against warm, melted anger

Colored with guilt.


Details | Free verse | |

To Be Loved By You Again

If I had but one chance more
To talk to you and hold you
I would fill you with those things
I held back out of fear I think
This time I would not be afraid
I would let you speak to my soul
Allow you deep in my heart too
And when I needed to weep
I'd accept your strong shoulder
When my spirit became hungry
I would let you feed me with
Words of wisdom and comfort
You'd surely be invited into the
Inner sanctum of my reality
There to find more love than
Either of us has ever known
If I had but one more chance....


Details | Free verse | |

Pressing On

Yes, I’ve been struggling
But I never gave up
Just kept asking my Father
Teach me to drink from this cup

Many days, I’ve fallen
Many nights have passed me by 
When it is that I‘m calling
He wipes the tears of my cry

Father, forgive me
I’ve done it all over again
So many times as the one before
Have I committed this sin

So Lord, help me
Teach me to go and sin no more
Cause I feel I’m not going to make it 
From this side, to the other shore

In Jesus’ name

Amen

Then there was silence and he said,

A just man falls seven times (but he gets back up)
Never does he stay down (he gets back up)
Keep trying to be true through the pain
Keep pressing on, pressing all the way.


Details | Free verse | |

Pain Sustains Eternally

Once, I entered insanity with nothing and walked away with something can only be explained as knowing everything is perception nothing is real just the really fake and the only power is in that which you create something from nothing a simple knowing no one ever knew me except for what they accepted from everything but the source for I am eternal a nothing existence in an invisible sun everything dead that it touches Your all just figments of my imagination and this whole wide world a small part of my creation just for entertainment I gave you pleasure never could measure any ounce of belief because the image only ever existed as a small internal knowing I knew it was there I know I existed while your living only through my cancerous cells Words hurt, and pain kills too many problems two little pills no more sorrow it serves no use no one cares when they feel abuse words build into a sentence as many lines lead me to finish a guilty closure, a salty sweet that can't maintain as words to be I close my eyes, to nod away the pain sustains, eternally.


Details | Free verse | |

Do as I say, not as I did

I sit in my square box of grey walls,  the iron bars 
Zebra ,melancholy shadows across the concrete floor 
I am not a teacher or lecturer ; You don’t have to listen to me
I just want to tell what to do ; before my house is your house

Respect your Parents, your Elders, your Superiors, Yourself and GOD 
Be Honest and Loyal, reach in the recesses of your mind, the Memories
Of your youth, your upbringing, your manners being molded by your parents
There is no one greater than you, there is no one less, Open your Heart

Let Truth and Love emanate it rays to those around you to those YOU LOVE
Do not deceive “ LOVE”, as I have done : Always be fair , Listen to the Ages
Hone Your Morals, now or come join me on my ice cold steel bed If the past
Were given back to me I would follow my Parents’ Principles “I wouldn’t be Here
                    
                                      Assignment : Morals

Inspired by "A Rambling POET'S" Contest  -- " In Search of the Human Mind "


Details | Free verse | |

The Mourning Phoenix, Josephine

The Aphotic semblance rises against her face
The king of shame reigns over all
Her Hallows are mine
We are the same, Josephine
Explain to me this sacrificial empathy
Josephine

"I'm living; the slowest way to die"
Hold on, my Josephine, everything you feel, is killing me
"I'm the lacunous lover, I must go to my ashened grave
In death I will lay, every word, every pain
I'm the victim, I can forgive
I can't go on - don't feel their wrath meant for me"

My name was meant for elegies
Not for the Wardens' acrimonies 
I can't look at a man without seeing a killer
I must go-
Not for the love of the death 
For the fear of life"

My Seraphic Josephine
Through the ashes you will claim victory 
Don't you say you must die
Elysia is in your grave
Through the ashes you will claim victory
My Seraphic Josephine
You are The Mourning Phoenix 


Details | Free verse | |

Broken Cookie Valentine


Broken Cookie Valentine
The problems that eye have is just connecting to my sweetheart.
The temporary glitches of the ethernet continue
to make problems go away and they will do so from the start.
Eye am not allowing anyone to bother me so that the memories so 
hard to do and time will not let me continue 
to be so angry at my ewe.
Eye need to have a better time but this is just what happened.
The cookie was in the shape of a valentine the thing was still unbroken 
and then the shape was gone after eye pulled it from 
the pocket of my jacket the thing was done 
but still eye saved it in a pocket to try to eat it later 
when the hunger from my daytime wanting has began 
so take all the interference and stuff it somewhere where
you can keep it because eye will not tolerate it in the 
beginnings of this day. 
There is no need to continue with the bother 
since the bother is not me
the damage does not interfere with the flavor 
or the taste of the cookie that eye like to call 
my Valentine 
and the thing is mostly sugar and my babay's kisses
are the same way so 
Sweet to me and then we have them iff
And then we have them then 
and then we have them again.


Details | Free verse | |

He Is Real And He Does Real Things

You know,
You are a beautiful person
And you are a beautiful soul.
Your faith is solidified in the ground,
Your hope is spread for all to hear,
Your love graces every heart to cheer,
Your belief in His truth has the power to change,
You believe because you know,
And that is what is so neat to see.


Details | Free verse | |

MERCY

MERCY

Power to heal
Power to deliver
The power to change within
All are birthed 
Out of the mercy of God

But to flow in your mercy
One must embrace your grace
So difficult for a people
Independent and self-sufficient
Undeserved favor
Does not set well
When all of our lives
We have been taught
To earn with our labors
All that we have

To understand mercy
Is to see my own sinfulness
In the light of a perfect holy God
To embrace his forgiveness
With repentance but not penance
Mercy received is
Mercy I can give

mja


Details | Free verse | |

Who can be Christians

Gays could be Christians

just as Adulterers can be Christians

Fornicators can be Christians

just as Drunkards can be Christians

Liars, Thieves, Greedy persons can be Christians

just as Revilers, and Extortioners can be Christians

Why

just as a recovering alcoholic is still an alcoholic

one drink makes the difference

self control is the key


Details | Free verse | |

Cry of a Warrior

Cry of a Warrior The beast stood on the outside Angry he could not get inside Sent to relieve her of her destiny For rescuing souls from his revelry Her body was frail and weak Upon her bones he did seek Lord I am too weak to fight However, in you I put my light Arch Angels entered the room Sent to protect by the groom One went to fight the beast The other raised her up to feast Letting go and letting God Freed the bonds sending His rod One mighty thrust of his light Dismembered the beast into the night This is the presage sent to demand Release my children! Is my command Leave their souls whole and untainted This night in my blood, you are painted As it is written So shall it be! Carole Cookie Arnold


Details | Free verse | |

Causality

Do you see my folly?
It strikes me every.
Flying bolts of guilt and shame,
Seek me out and call my name.
You may see them, you may not,
But I doubt it for you know naught.
An assault of unsaid words,
A rush of possible consequences.
What will happen?
That's the point.
Possibilities of actions,
Effects and reactions.
All this burns inside,
Waiting for the truth you cannot reveal, 
For you fear the truth,
And the wounds it won't let heal.


Details | Free verse | |

Forgiveness

Perish me
You bloody pain
There cannot be anything worse than this guilt
I have seen the price for my time
I have no want to head back to them
What make you think that they miss myself?
That they wish the burden who has befallen them
Back into their lives?
Seek Vengeance, is what they'll do
Clean this world of my wretchedness
Mayhap I should head back
End this feud for the moment being
Pay my price in full
I shall die anyway at the blade of their sword
No grand way to sidestep fate I presume
Well then
I shall prevent the title of coward
Those who have met same fate as I shall be proud
Meeting my end with a smile
Feed the quiddity of the lies with the marked truth
They may forgive me yet...
But I know naught until I have crossed that bridge.


Details | Free verse | |

Poignant Inferences Of Our Indifferences

Fear conquers and guides them like sheep in a trance with their weak-willed existence only leaving nothing to chance defy and define this reality to your making I was born into blessing behold your creation Worship the free thinking for they think like God's weaving such narrow path so the sheep don't stray off seems that religion, in my opinion started off as an experiment until it's control was so spiritual it became a universal experience the only path ever laid out was to follow or burn close your eyes into religion, or open them, to learn My evolution was a revelation I could not foresee gave my all to be all me thus, escaping such dull sanity don't let the fear drive you away to become one little lost sheep thinking they know everything yet, follow so blindly A million billion stars await to see if I shall fade if that day becomes my fate I won't care what comes to be for I am free from your influence as you try and pull me down don't you know I laid at the bottom and escaped the worst of it somehow Whats the use of a follower or a leader to guide control telling them what they need to hear to feel less fear than before careful now not to fall asleep for it could be your death walking in the demonic trance right over a rocky cliff as you say your fighting for pretend beliefs with no realization left for yoursellf as if you were not even existing except to follow the thought trails of someone else.


Details | Free verse | |

What may it take to reply

..
What may it take to reply
A apology after another
A sweet chocolate
A poetry of praise
A Joke to laugh
A bouquet of flowers
A shower of reminders
Or just a though that
I remembered you
What may it take to reply
..


Details | Free verse | |

Do you remember

Do you remember the first place we met?
I'd been out walking, and you were all wet.
Too far from home, to run for your mum,
Too fearful of strangers, inside to come.

You took to my barn, and lay in the hay,
to keep yourself warm and to hide away.
I bought some hot food and some cocoa to start,
and left them to warm your insides, and your heart.

Many would call me a perv or poof,
All I wanted to do was give you a roof.
To let you dry off, and show you no harm,
not hurt you, abuse you, or cause you alarm.

I bought you a phone, for you to ring home,
to tell your mum how far you'd managed to roam.
You told me she'd come in her car to collect,
she was angry and mad, and I would get wrecked.

If only she'd understand my intentions, my care,
but for her - I was sick - the understanding, not there.
I'd try to explain, but it wasn't so wise,
I'd look like a weirdo in that mother's eyes.

I told him to sit there, and I'd wait inside.
As I turned round, he hugged me, and deep down I cried.
I gave him a smile, and a wave; it was true,
And as he was driven away, I hurt. I was blue.

The very next day I awoke to a knock,
it was Mum and the boy, to my great shock.
She smiled, and said sorry, and I got 2 hugs that day,
one of those from a mother, whose love couldn't stray.

So now you know me, and you know of my story,
of tolerance, love, and kindness - not glory.
We're a family now, son, husband and wife,
Look past what you think - you may be ruining a life.


Details | Free verse | |

For 15 minutes.

I will put my half blood in a huge metal can.
Take it for chemical analysis.
So as to see my beliefs and my perception,
my vision and my aspirations.
Those i loved and others i hated.
With my other half i will paint in brick walls.
At the top,maby above all,
i will write these two words.
NO MORE
NO MORE
And then i will go to the store with aquariums.