Visited you today
as the sun set in the horizon…
the orange tinged carnations
were a perfect complement
for the skies
and for you…
orange and blue
always remind me of you
the winds softly blew
and I just sat there
staring at the grass,
well more at your name really…
what I am looking at,
that it’s been seven years
of missing you,
of just putting that reality
at the back of my mind…
But there are days,
such as today
which make me
confront that reality—
I see your smile,
remember your laughter
celebrate your spirit
and your love
Tears, I tell you I have
the most stubborn tears
maybe because they
make it so real for me?
I look around me
and look for that sign
Nope, not there…
I say a prayer
and speak to you
thankful for the life shared
I kiss the date that you were born
and walk away
my reflection on the car window
One last look around,
and then I see it…
a cat, as we drive away…
Skies now streaked purple and pink
**My brother would have been 40 today, May 6…
Brother of the Quill
Join me in a dance
For mother sings nightly
And father sleeps within a trance
they'll never hear our steps
Through hemlock and the fields of wheat
All night long we will dance
Moon Mother lights our way
And our ancestors shine as bright stars
We will run as the wolves
And sing from our hearts
Brother of the Quill
Join me in a prance
We will shoot stars with our arrows
And wish for another dance
They'll never hear the swish
Of when we sneak back in
And fall asleep before Father wakes again
Home Of The Hang Man
The children are so full of doubt
No one is allowed to speak
No one is allowed to shout
Opinions are driven underground
Seems that every time they do it wrong
Always been the same old song
Never get it right
Never allowed to speak
Never allowed to fight
It’s a strange house
The children are so full of doubt
A strange house
The kids just don’t understand
They don’t see that this is the way it’s all been planned
Keep them frightened is the game
Then all those “other” things won’t need to be explained
Why is big brother always mad
Why is younger brother always sad
Why does he sit in his bedroom all alone
Because it’s a strange house
And not a home
It’s a strange house
The children are so full of doubt
A strange house
Everything they do or say
Is turned into to a weapon to build upon the barricade
And Dad pretends he’s not afraid
Of the sudden discovery of suffocated memories
The dark deeds linger in a cage
Of ridicule and violence that makes the babies cry
So Mum has buried her suspicions worryings away
In Sunday lunches usual farce
A make believe gathering of corrupted loving and pretended merry making
It’s a strange house
The kids are so full of doubt
A strange house
Big brother hit the self destruct
With pills and needles long before he decided he was gay
No one ever asked him why he was so mad
And no one ever asked why younger brother was so sad
He sits up stairs in his room
Surviving in a sea of doubt
The suffocated memories have all come out
He’s always sad and he’s always alone
The babies to they both have grown
But he doesn’t know them anymore
It’s been so long since he left that so called home
It’s a strange home
The children are so full of doubt
A strange house
Their children are so full of doubt
Brought up and made this way
All their futures turn to grey
As all the buried memories fight their own way out
Remember why they always felt so wrong
Remember what happened when we were young
And mother just closed her eyes she did not help
All the future turns to grey
Brought up and made to be this way
Father was the hang man who took their lives away
To be called ..
~ Grandma is a Honor ~
I have been blessed with 4 Grandchildren
~ one lays in Heaven " Kaleb " He is God's Angel ~
~ His twin brother he will always watch over , and be in his soul~
For he loved his Brother so much in the womb ,
he chose Heaven which gave life to his twin
~ I feel his spirit when I see the other Grandson ~
Time passed another gift to see
we are " Mickes" and Loved
Our Dad held the title in Baseball
~ that's how we roll ~
those children are Grandmas hero's
The Irish they love big and Family is everything
The brothers will protect the beautiful sister
~ as many lads will be calling ~
Every time my Grandson hits a home run
There will be a Angel watching proudly in the stand
It will be as if the Angel lifted him when he runs
~no one runs faster then my Grandson~
either baseball or Art ~ you shall find your gift given
These children have been blessed~
~ a beauty to hard to describe
If you think not ~~ Take a look at the Mom
That girl can stop Traffic
after raising three and still~
"Inspired by the gift and loss of Grandchildren "
May our precious " Kaleb " softly rest where Angels only Dwell
Since first I saw you, it was your eyes,
mesmerizing, your gaze transporting
me to a realm, not of fantasy, real,
where young men go when cupid’s
arrow takes root.
Since first I saw you, it was your lips,
captivating, holding me frozen
in anticipation of our lips brushing
for the first time.
Since first I saw you, it was your voice,
a crescendo, light, invigorating,
each word you speak intensifies
my hearing, enveloping each
note, time ceases as I hang motionless
Since first I saw you, it was your hair,
long, flowing, gently rising above
your shoulders as a slight breeze
passes through sending waves
of your essence my way.
The sun magnifying each strand,
highlighting the minute
variances of invigorating color,
creating a halo effect, a portrait of
your beauty forever imprinted.
Since first I saw you, It was you,
my love forever more for you,
I found you crying in the closet when you were only five
A walk-through closet that opened onto both our bedrooms
You had a bad dream didn’t know where to turn
Mom and Dad weren’t home left us with Uncle Joe
but he always went to bed right after supper
And he wasn’t our uncle just a lonely old man
who stayed on when we rented his house
You were my little brother so I took you to my bed
Later you told me I petted you like a little lost puppy
The next morning I helped you make your bed
Our first chore of the day making beds
smoothing and tucking covers
erasing signs of disturbed nights
Making neat what was chaos
We didn’t realize we were making beds in a burning house
Inside our home reality was knocked askew
to match our town struck by the tornado a week ago
I held tightly to your hand as we boarded the bus
Mom was running away from Dad taking us with her
No great adventure awaited us only fear of an unknown future
At ten all I knew to do was bury my face in your cowlick and cry
You ran away from home I found you sitting at the corner
with tears rolling down dirty freckled cheeks
stumped because you were not allowed to cross the street
Your pillowcase full of clothes a sad lump on the pavement
I took your hand and led you home
I taught you to make your own bed
with perfectly tucked corners and fresh clean sheets
But our house was still burning
Soon only the two of us would be left
Our sister headed to Heaven wrapped in her chenille bedspread
Mom trailed behind hanging onto a loose tail of the sheet
flapping forlornly in a cool autumn breeze
I took your hand sat with you on the window seat
We watched parades of people passing through our house
who never noticed us And we waited
We waited years for Mom to return although she slept in her bed
each night and made it first thing in the morning
Our house was still burning
You grew up to set your own houses on fire
It was what you knew making beds in burning houses
Each time I found you took you by the hand
led you to a peaceful place where we could sit quietly
and watch the world go by for a time
Words unnecessary between us
They had been since before you could talk
when Mom placed your chubby newborn self
in my four-year-old arms and said Here’s your baby brother
You watch out for him He needs you
Your fires have all gone out now
No burning embers left to catch on the bed covers
You make your bed with ease precision
and a renewed sense of purpose
I watch happily from a distance of only miles
And know you can feel me still holding your hand
For Kevin, the most exasperating, loyal, and lovable little brother anyone could have.
A burst of white light
gamma rays, overbearing
a flash of brilliance
burns through to my soul
everything is like hell
the world starts to melt
in the blink of an eye
just the cold blackness
I don't care if I am not again
what I once was, for at this moment
I am greater now
than ever before
I took the path between
teetering, tight roping walking
right up to my right
divined in my unholy state
I thought I told you
I am your king
still you sit there, hesitating
I know you hate me
what does that mean?
I hate just about everything
still I'm chosen
I did not wish before
now bow down to me
refuse me no more
for I shall always be your demon
until you accept me as your King.
I don't even know you
though you say we used to be
best of friends, you and me
the day you ditched me
I remember now
exactly how it played out
back when we were just tiny things
even back then I still was King
you thought me stupid
just a ruse
I would laugh inside, you see?
not one of you single, mean people
ever even knew me
in a world, mostly seen to me
that is why only I can be your true King
and bring forth a new source
of light everlasting.
As two worlds collide slowly aligned
one wrapped in shadows
one bathed in white
evils swirling in the clouds above
I'll always be the king you love
to hate or despise as in your blood
I thought I told you, I am the one
I am the way, the way out shall be shown
breathe in my spirit as it carries you away
breathe in my faith it shall carry your empty space
and deposit you gently on a cloud just enough
higher than you've ever dreamed of
for I am king now, and your in my hell
your in my imagination, I'll just never tell
you'll feel as though dreaming, you'll feel now
if you try and see
you were always found the most
shared in the light cast upon me
the last bright star in heaven.
Denounce my name, if you may
One year later, still not afraid
A black sheep, a darkened spade
That's just life, I'm not right
I'm in the wrong, follow along
Like a piper, I'll pitch a song
Mesmerized, the weak wills sing
I thought he told you, he's still our king.
He woke and saw his beloved asleep with one breast partially exposed
And with his fantastic limp he works his way to the kitchen
He made coffee for her with croissant lathered with jam
Gently he pulled at the exposed women and gestures with the tray
Happily she wakes and with great affection reaches for him
Coffee is second and pastries with jam come close to him
But he is first and the love hits him like the wind
Gently it began and gale force now
He had to lash himself so he wouldn't be swept away
And it grew
She always lay in their position and there was no other
He would mold himself to her and tease her nipple
He came home weathered from the battle and with grief
Friends had been shot by snipers and the heat
He had seen a woman with a basket approach his friend
And she dropped the basket and pulled the belt
The explosion deafened him and his comrade's face is gone
Fragments hit him but he is running to his friend
But the friend lays silent
Gazing to the wetness on his leg he falls
He is deafened and wakes in terror and looks upon the leg
And finding himself in bed she tries to talk with him
But he claim's it's a bad dream and the basket falling
The limp was his reminder of that day and he eats the croissant for his friend
Here you are, only twelve, at our kitchen table.
Such a carrot top you were! Strangers used to think
you were our red-head mother’s natural son.
And here’s that photo you took of me at college.
Though you’re not in it, how could I ever forget
it was you in front of me that snapped that shot?
For I’m laughing and so glad you came to see me!
In this one, all ten of us are in the back yard
dressed in our Sunday best - our first big reunion!
I’m nearly 30; just look at my silly perm!
Folks still mistake me for Dori in this picture!
Look how Mom and Thea - for once - are smiling!
You’re standing behind me, in a lovely grey suit,
only 32 and almost out of law school!
Here from more recent pictures, this shows a rare time
we were joined, but sadly, for Dad‘s funeral.
You‘re not in this one, Dale . . . nor in any others.
That picture in our back yard was to be the last.
My dear stepbrother, the best man I ever knew -
Taken from us so young. . . you remain beloved.
" I remember that day
As clear as the crystal springs in June"
only it wasn't June, It was August
the morning air was thick like smoke
it choked me awake
the first blush of day
flushed across the sky
blood red clouds
colored her path
I lay still
like the air
without a hint
of summer's wind
the clock on the wall
with the tick, tock,
its bony hands
seemed to skip along
until I arose from bed
I sipped on coffee
as I took in the news
unsure what my day would bring
...and then I could hear a buzz
as if a fly was making circles
beside the bed, then a ring, ring,
ring echoed within my purse
I stared at the clock
my heart began to beat
faster then time
was it my father
did something happen
I worried as I listened
as if being choked
with my ears
to make sense
of the words
...and then silence
fell all around
as if deaf
unable to process
who turned 49
just the day before
like the august wind
no more jokes
or candles atop cake
his wick had burned out
within that last breath of air
and it burns, slow
as the years pass
still to this day
yet I'll remember that day
pick a line contest
"Reflections when the summer breathes"
Sandy Adams 8-22-2013
The tags are labels placed on a table.
Beginning with A and ending with Z, the labels placed on the table enables me to readings.
I defeated being judgmental and did not become analytic.
My mind is a schema.
The stems are roots ending.
Argumentative are the colors exploding.
White becomes mixed and black is a misted.
Meaning is that both are within an element.
The bags that I carry appear to be heavy but they are not.
They are held many ways so that my arms will not tire.
I walk with a slight lean to my shoulder because my purse must strap.
I arch upright like a cat.
The stems rooted and garlic is scape.
The railroad track is the shortcut we take.
The blood is enriched and the heart strengthens.
Once grown, he knows life ascertains.
Pulling back the curtains, he views the beautiful garden planted by his beloved mother.
The clothes in this bag I will wash completing my chores for today.
Once done, I will leave to find something to enhance my life.
I feel agitated and I must relax.
Tomorrow will be one of the best days in time.
The stem is a broken root.
It uses or loses its route to new growth.
The knowledge it provides is wisdom to the planter.
The stem asks the question of why did this happen.
He is the silly brother of death
is never seen around the cradle
and has never turned up for the
He is waiting for you with jester cap and painted grin
Roaring with laughter he pushes aside
Together on the seesaw
he pushes you higher
and higher until you
dangle over boundless
gorges until you
scream you have to go because you
so many things to do
so little time to spend
With both feet back
on solid ground you buy him a
for his big brother to arrive
In my dreams we sing and play,
Chase each other like we once did.
lying on the hill at night we would dream about another life.
A place beyond the stars, a place that only we knew of.
We grew up and our priorities changed
I never expected our paths would not cross again
nor did I picture bars separating us.
In my dreams is where we meet
It's the only way to touch your face,
see your smile and hold your hand
for we are living in different lands.
You are my brother and brother you'll be
and I will see you again in my dreams...
Dear God, He's done it once again,
He had to go back, and take care of them,
His real momma and his sister, and his step Daddy too,
They needed things, that only he could do.
It's a bad part of town, he's told me so,
I asked him not to leave, but he said he had to go.
Bring him back, I want him in one piece,
You brought him once before,
Now Please God, return him to me.
My brother is my savior, I worship at his feet,
I need him in my life, his presence is so sweet.
I heard a slamming door, that must be him now,
I'll pray again later, that's a promise, my vow.
Thank you God, for bringing him home to me,
If he was awake I'm sure he'd agree.
He came home last night, with a black and blue eye,
His lip was swollen, and he had hidden tears in his eyes.
He ribs were bruised, in fact I think one was broke,
His head was throbbing, when he came in he barely spoke.
I helped him down the hall, though he's much bigger than I,
And when his knees gave out, you must have been nearby.
I somehow found a strength I never had before,
And with my arms around him, I got him through the door,
I laid him on my bed, and told him not to sleep,
I stayed up all night, and tended to his needs.
Dear God, thank you, for keeping him alive,
I don't know what happened, but I didn't let myself cry.
He's my brother God, and my love for him will thrive,
We watch each others backs, you don't have to ask why.
You answered my prayers, you brought my brother to me,
You gave him a home, God I hope you can see,
We don't need an answer, though our question is as simple as can be,
We sometimes wonder, did you give me to him, or him to me.
The black river mills are seen in the distance
The red skies show spiraling, gray clouds
The earth is man’s canvas
And the mills slowly mix the paint
We have seen the devastation
We have felt the desperation
Some of us wallow in our watercolor
And leave the canvas blank
The mills crush their bones to the bottom
Mixing them nicely into the paint
People are pushed in without thought
Others go in willingly
The river mills are closer to my view
And my brush is stiff and unused
Women and children walk alongside the rivers
The elderly follow and sometimes shake their heads
On a cliff, I watch them all
My brushstroke stiff and worthless
Shakily I climb down the precarious cliff
Brush in hand
Canvas in view
Watching people suffer in the paint of their mistakes
People wanting to be part of the picture
I never desired this. . .
I wanted to create a masterpiece
The women and children are gone
I see a little black boy standing alone
He is watching me curiously
Tears in his eyes
He is a watcher
He was born to suffer
He never desired this either
The boy smiles sadly and takes my hand
“It’s okay. I understand.”
I shed digital tears
And program some control
It is quiet, save for the sound of the river mills
It has mixed well
The colors are astounding
“Are you sure you want to stay?”
The boy nods.
“No one wants me mixed with them.”
He is a creator
He is a watcher
I dip my brush into the churning waters
I then hand it to the little black boy
“The world is your canvas now. . .” I whisper.
It was NEVER mine to meddle with. . .
And we are set apart for a reason
But together we are incomparable
Ever since the flames licked
my fair pink burning flesh,
nothing in my life has remained the same.
I had to go back in to
save my little brother Chris.
Life without him would kill me,
besides myself I would forever blame.
Even though it’s been ten years,
my face still feels the pain.
Having to go through high school
with a scarred face is just lame.
I’ve got the body of a goddess;
I must admit I’m beautiful from the neck down,
but the hideous burn scars
on my face have remained.
Months after the accident
weeks before school started,
a knock at my door came.
An anonymous donor sent a box
full of beautifully hand decorated
Mardi Gras masks made for only the fairest lady,
that’s the day I got my new name.
Each month a new box of masks
would arrive and I would wear everyone.
I became known as the royal shapely, disfigured lady.
Mardi Gras was my fame.
One night a mysterious white box appeared,
inside rested the most unique and intricately
adorned mask of all. It was a pure white mask adorned
with a delicate French ivory lace, fluffy pure white
dove feathers and shiny white pearls outlined the mask.
White is normally considered lame
but this was breathtaking, nothing plain.
Inside the box was also an
invitation, asking me to attend
the prom with "Masked Bandit" Lane.
I couldn’t believe it! All along it was
my handsome next door neighbor and
Chris' best friend, who had been sending
the ornate masks to me. He was my hero now,
my enthusiasm could hardly be tamed..
Lane had always adored my brother Chris and seemed
to like me too. I always knew he had
a crush on me, but I never knew to what extent.
I rushed over to his house where he was playing
with my brother Chris a heated basketball game.
I hugged him and told him that
I would love to go with him to the prom.
Just between you and me,
Lane and I will always be the
masked King and Queen of Mardi Gras
and forever in love we will reign.
A tale of one mans rage:
I listen to shattered voices
and trembling fearful screams
rattling my inner conscious
corrupting once vibrant dreams
A stream of words trapped inside
left hidden for so long
escape with a sudden fury
in that moment I was wrong
The alcohol in my system
enhanced this primal rage
smacking her down emotionally
my actions very strange
Its like I stepped outside myself
watching this violence transpire
I only wanted to talk
but my actions did not inspire
Physically I may have struck her
but I honestly don't remember
with the devils blood surging my veins
intensifying my temper
Now i'm filled with agony
and torment for what i'd done
now I must rise above it
for my daughter and my son
Dedicated to a wonder father who had finally reached his limit.
After so long, and so much abuse, he SNAPPED...
Matthew, Beautiful with his hazle, brown, green, eyes.
He has been a favorite of the ladies since my mom brought him home.
The darkness of the brown in his skin, but the light in to, is so raidient.
He can make one laugh, like no one else.
He's ten, but man he can act like a little old man that has gone through life.
He try's to boss me, ha! that little reble.
Somtimes I feel like I'm a bad example For him.
I wonder if he loves me, I know he does, but I just wonder sometimes.
My baby brother he will always be, and I will love, even when he hates me.
He will suceed, for sure.
Baby brother I love you.
Please love me.
Not a day goes by
that I don't remember you.
A castle in my heart was made for you,
from the nightmares, to guard you.
As the cold breeze passing through sings,
wrapped you, shielding with my wings,
when he came sneaky in the night,
the grim reaper, he dares might.
with a slash from his scythe,
he took my wings too.
Flightless, wandering lost,
tired, fell kissing the dirt.
Woke up one morning,
in the middle of the woods.
Down on my knees, pleading you,
"Dear brother! one word from you will do."
For now I know what love is?
but none I have to share it with.
Let another sun set,
Let another flower wilt,
Let another autumn cast its gloom,
Let another tear role,
As ye part, and bid
The final adieu.
St. Stephen’s college
Today as I stand here,
With your name engraved not just on stone
But in the hearts of millions who thank you
For not letting them cry,
I feel proud that it was you…
We wish you were here,
There’s not a day we don’t think of you.
There’s not a minute we don’t miss you.
But we’re glad you ran into death
So that a thousand others could walk into life.
It was not your duty,
You weren’t meant to be there,
But you took it up,
Did what you had to do
As a citizen of the global world.
The little ones will never know
What a wonderful person you were.
But they’ll always know that
You were a hero…
How you died for the greater good…
Tears, grief, pride, longing - a blend of everything.
Its been ten years, ten long years
But the memory’s still fresh and cutting.
It still hurts to know
That you could be here had you stayed back.
But you didn’t and that’s made you a hero.
You ran straight into it
While a thousand others were running away.
Your death is history….
Millions died with you
But you stand out ‘coz you made your choice.
As I stand here, I know that a decade ago, today
You were here somewhere,
Running into a cloud of dust and ashes
Searching for the smallest sign of movement
To bring them back to life.
Somewhere between the despair and hope
You forgot to breathe…
I pray every day that
History would rewind itself
Back to that fateful September morning,
Not because I want to hold you back…
But because I want to come with you…
It would have made a difference.
I know it would have…
I know you’re with me
In my dreams, in my daily life
Laughing at my blunders,
Guiding me through hardships.
My guardian angel…
On this September morning,
Not exactly the same as before,
Here I am telling the world
That my twin brother died
Saving the victims of 9/11.
Reflections of imperfections
have shown me a way
that I can move mountains
through my power of faith
even though I can't see him
I know he is real
through the power of prayer
and a Love that I feel
It's growing inside me
like a flower in bloom
shall I reveal my powers
or is it too soon
I am reading the signs
through my darkness I find
a reason for belief in
the light of mankind
that I know shall overcome
the greatest of odds
the Love I seek amazes me
especially through the flaws
because now I am inspired
through the hero's that bring
my throne through the darkness
on which I return on as your King.
My Dearest Little Sister, Hope this finds YOU and YOURS Healthy and High in
the Spirit. Happy Valentines Day Flowers, Candlelight Dinner
would have said chocolate ! but I think YOU said to me
YOU don't eat chocolate maybe a Family portrait
Kisses from big brother Hugs from a big brother
You will ALWAYS be my Sweet Little Valentine
MAY GOD'S LOVE BLESS YOU this Valentines Day
Blessings all that You LO VE, hold dear and Cherish
As Sun Rose this Morning I felt the warmth of your hand
Look past the rising Sun I see a Sister's Loving Smile
I feel little sister's embrace as I also embrace Mandy
Tear of Love fall from my eyes A desire to cross the big Pond
A VALENTINES DAY Handshake To my Brother in Law
The man that lavishes Love upon My Sister, Mandy Tams
To ALL of You My BELOVED FAMILY Here on POETRYSOUP
May LOVE surround each and Every ONE. HAPPY VALENTINES DAy
The yard my world
Or so I’m told
Was where I spent my time
Where this little lass
A tomboy too
Loved rolling in the grass.
Trees ladened with mangoes
yellowed with ripe
A great temptation to this little child
Who with a stone and David’s aim
Brought mangoes down Goliath
Playmates I had and many too
From chickens, birds and ducks
To puppies, pigeons, turkeys and cats
Not to mention the upside down bats.
A sister and brother my siblings two
My sister’s a lady no sport for fun
My brother my follower was my ally won
He did what I told Him no questions asked
But got many a spanking when we crossed the line.
The old hammock swung from a branch
That bellied and hung
Quite low to the ground
For many a day both brother and I
swinging to and fro
did topple to the ground.
But best were the moments
I spent with God when we talked of many things
while I blamed Him for everything
that went wrong in my life
Oh those precious memories are the fabric of my life.
Native, Liteskin, sun kissed
sit, talk, get to know me
for I am not my skin and
even though the tan pigment
I am my heart, thoughts
and actions,reflection of
A car accident took
my Homies brother this morning
and as we sit and talk to him
now, through faded room mourning
Young man, stole pop’s keys
from sleeping pockets
joy riding with friends
headlights beaming, MN
summer star sky gleaming
Dad's unaware, boy & friends left
till woke, by early morn’ meeting
God opened the skies and took
two good ones away
I felt it rained, clouds crying briefly
for them today
70 miles an hour, Murderapolis streets
took two good homies heartbeats
jus’ a mile away, a close
friend heard the tires screech
Driver yells to him, “get a knife & cut me out!”
Neighbor, like doe eyes in headlights
filled with doubt
ends up dying after all
at the hospital
down 29th Ave and McKinley St.
Two of the Five Souls involved
God, now, does keep
I recall seeing the drivers smile
less than one week ago
why Mista Watkins & White Jr.
was it yo’ time to go
your loved ones may never know
We don’t always understand
the Lords plan
but He surely knows
heartache and sorrow
is how July fourteenth does go
two significant young Southside sons
at 3:30 am, drove into a utility pole
crushed glass ridden streets
two homies, with us no mo’
I pray Jesus be with them
as they grieve, and friends
surround them with the love
car accidents & tragedies
close to home to you
tend to place things in perspective
defrost a persons mind
set it into view
cuz’ its not about the color, of
your skin, or where you came from
it’s the way you impact the world
in the end, who you’ve grown to
the lives lost, were good peoples
Stood for good values like Church steeples
vibrant athletic youths of the future
barely 14 & 17, gone too soon
I hear the sad, cry, lonely night of our
Murderapolis streets, claim
two more young heartbeats
you will forever be remembered
and loved, keep an eye on us
from above, we know you’re
in a better place, were all running
an impossible to win race
for we all have a time card to punch
under the Lords undying grace
your Influence and charm, young men
is locked within us
and we shall all party again
in the Kingdom of Heaven
our final resting Place
7/15/2010: R.I.P.- Patrick Watkins (17) & Duane White Jr. (14)- South Side, Minneapolis, MN
you are forever loved and missed, but not forgotten, watch us from Heaven, Amen
"Dear God, give me a big brother.
I'll be the best little sister ever.
I know its not possible for my parents to go back in time.
But I'd love for a big brother that is all mine.
Make him kind, and make him sweet,
He doesn't have to be perfect, as long as he loves me.
Dear God, can he be taller, with big soulful eyes,
And when he smiles, can it rival the sun's shine?
Give him strength, as fierce as a lion's roar,
He'll swear to protect me forever more.
He would wipe my tears from my cheeks,
And with a laugh easily calm me.
He would understand my heart and head,
In a way that no one would ever fully understand.
Dear God, can he teach me,
All the things I would never know.
He doesn't have to come from where I come from,
But can he takes me to the places that he goes.
Dear God, I am begging,
Please grant this one plea,
I realize that it may be a hard request,
I know you are not a Genie.
But here I am alone and cold,
With no true love from my family,
I'm lonely and I'm longing,
For someone who will care for me.
Dear God, please give me a big brother,
I promise I'll be the best little sister ever"
The song expresses the feelings of an Indian village girl. Her parents have fixed her
marriage (It generally happens in the rural areas of India, even to-day). She is about to
leave for the first time for her in-law’s place. She do not want to go to her father in
law’s place leaving her parents, her soul mates friends the animals and birds. The song
sketches the tender feelings of her heart for her Mother, Father and Brother & for the
animals and birds, whom she used to look after until now as her most precious friends and
who taught her how to sing a sweet song.
The Song of a Teenage Girl 2/2
Still if you have decided to send me to my in laws, place, O dear,
This year, O My Dear Father and Mother please,
Do not forget to send my brother on Rakhi*
So that I can tie up the Rakhi String* on the wrist of my sweet brother.
You know O Mother, being a newly wedded bride, I won’t speak much in my in laws place.
If I speak, who would bother to understand the feelings of my heart.
Still if you have decided to send me to my in laws, place,
O Mother, Please don’t forget, what I have told you today,
Only then, your daughter would be happy in her new alien place.
Kanpur India 17th October 2010
* Sasural. A Hindi word. Meaning father-in-laws place
*alien place. The place of in-laws generally remains alien for rural girls, as their
marriages are fixed by the parents & in some cases, even the husband remains totally
unknown to the bride.
* Koyal. The melody singing bird of India.
* Rakhi. Rakhi is a festival of siblings of opposite sex,
which symbolizes the love & the emotional bond between them.
Shadows proned in pierced dark desolation
She waited for me on that day
A given chance at which to bow the knee to pray
There was a rich love I used to know
At bitter silence by which to go...
The interpretation of a dream,
No need for silence no mere solace scene
Never leaving your poor heart alone
As with a rod that Moses felt,
From a distance the sound of wild feathers
A whole host of words that were whispered;
As if you haven't already heard
In bitter silence we become unshackled
From the bitter place with cold egos glaze
The she suddenly spread her wingas on windows peak;
The cold chill sends a rage down spine.
A single horn
From the center of its forehead
Beauty in its essence
Brother, you been stacking it on
stick by stick, building me a fire.
Child by child, taught to build a pyre--
keep us warm, hide from the cold.
Stares of hell that face your soul
huff by huff, puff by puff
shutting down the wants for food,
shutting down the wants for love.
Here I am, clicking my fingers,
where you used to click your lighter--
"Ha, ha", fireworks to the sky!
Burns me inside to see you clicked off.
No one home, no one feeding the babes
no one working, no one piling on the fire.
I don’t know if it makes me sick hot and cold.
Sick, is the truth, you’ve made me feel
--after Just that Archaic Poet’s Playing with Fire