The days seem to go by so fast. there is a void in the air, the birds have lost their vibrant beat, the ocean has lost its luster, the soil feels solid and dry.
My soul feels as if it has left my body before my death, my dreams haunt my day, the tears stain my steps, my doctor says that it is depression, I say that it is reality, I am intoxicated by society,I am numb by perscriptions.
Why do I feel so isolated within myself? is there no one in my painfully tight shoes? can anyone understand my pain? can anyone melt in my sorrows? why am I this way? why is the world so cruel? why can't I be normal?
Wait! I am normal, what am I saying, I know now, the veil has been lifted, humanity is my enemy, the sins that drip from their sweat, the dread that follows their shadows, their souls of black, their intentions of greed pull a shade across their eyes.
They are destined for doom, they will not be saved, they will not find salvation, they belittle me, they curse me, they shame me, but they are right about one thing, I am different, unlike them, I will be saved in the last days.
Red rambling roses.
Pink parading pansies
Yellow yawning ylang ylang
Scarlet shining strawberries
Gorgeous growing gardenias
Beautiful bending bracken
Lovely lilting lilies
Attractive ambling agapanthus
My dream is to become a scientist,
researching things that were not,
looking at things in the microscope
until a really good result I got
My dream is to become a writer,
about mysteries, adventures and more
to introduce a new way of writing
and open a very new door
My dream is to become an artist,
(all this I'm only just dreaming,)
but while I'm thinking of all these,
I'm still stuck up window-cleaning !
Snowflakes smoothly slipping
From the shiny,soft and silky sky
Swaying silently and skillfully
so spectacular swirling
A heated rush,
Pink tinted flush,
Reflection as is,
An insights quiz.
Who art thou,
Hand across thy chest,
A promised test.
Channels to choose,
Casting unforgettable news,
Rose pedals fled.
As the dreamer recieves,
Their reaction achieves.
It takes a dream to make a dream possible.
(Dedication: For Tim Smith, my PoetrySoup buddy)
Sun steers shadow
Moon mimes mellow
Firm faith follows
Day dons deep daze
Hurl hollow haze
Mist meets mind maze
Describe dream dance
Passion's plush prance
Chasing charm's chance
Curves charm clear choice
Play plots prime poise
Next norm now noise
Time transits trip
Life loiters leap
Soon season sleeps
Make motives meet
Start story sweet
Touch tender treat
Be bold belief
Rest ripe relief
Glimpse gloomy grief
Pain paves pathway
Cheer calms cold clay
Deuce detains day
Death deals dire deed
Nurture notes need
Flesh finds fine feed
20 Feb 2014
CHASING THE DREAM
Sahara like breeze blows Nubian melodies
serenading warm ebony loins. Nile River
ecstasy birth beautiful bronze broods
in the spaces left by wandering time.
Truth etches freedom threading
between the banks of reality;
in the shadows of Moses
the glimpse from the mountain top reflects
fleeing visions of the drummer’s dream deferred.
The morning comes: a new day begins.
Ahead of the game,
Shown by evidence,
Body filled; tense.
I'm clear of doubt,
The rippled sheer.
Unraveling down West,
Opening up; tall,
Best of the best,
If I can't walk, I'll crawl.
There's intense steam,
Common ground; team,
Haters will hit;but choke.
Phrases by action,
My hand flow,
High to low.
Artistic up front,
Surveying for you,
Messages to hunt,
Head of the crew.
Unwind to heal,
Natural mind at work,
Beauty to kneel,
Intentions to merk.
Tinkering my brain,
On paper to strain.
I shall generate,
The emphasis expectations,
Stirring up bate,
Hear my unique creations.
I live in a place striving for sobriety surrounded in alcohol looking for happiness trapped among our very own sadness. I hear my people’s laughs and I hear my people’s cries, but most of all I see their dreams because their dreams are my dreams because we remain not against each other today as enemies but hidden friends united through culture, language and blood. I laugh with my people and of course I cry with my people and I fight with my people but most of all I continue to dream with my people. I know who I am and where I am from to know where I been to still hope to where I am going to go. I feel darkness engulf not only myself but also almost my entire reservation’s race, no matter mixed or not because soon our culture and language will have no face without any more light to shine upon it. I know where I lived and still live to know if I will truly go where I truly want to go in life before I have my one walk with death. I know by a long shot that I am not the best but by a close hit on the reservation’s target I could be better.
I take a stand against self to stand against others to better a worsening crowd of many young lost indigenous souls waiting to be unknowingly found and waiting for something similar to what I’m about to write. I take a stand for self so that others know that we aren’t all lost and we can and will be found with the true hope of no one’s but your own. I take a stand because my brothers and sisters wont, I take a stand because now days most the people around me or within me can’t or don’t know how, I take a stand for the children who don’t have a father and mother as I once had, I take a stand for my unborn child almost here, I take a stand for courage because within me is filled with fear, I take a stand against because the alcohol and drugs within me now I just can’t stand, I take a stand for those around me who cannot stand, I take a stand for a culture dying on its knee’s trying to get back up, I take a stand for the forsaken yet to be forgiven self-stand.
I patiently wait, lying away in the darkness searching for light even though I can see the light I just don’t know how to get on thy path to the light. I am not alone, I know for a fact that I am not alone in my thoughts and feelings about life on earth here. I can see our pain, I can hear the hollers and screams, I can feel your anguish and I can smell our destruction. I walk through the reservation valley of darkness as if I am but a blind witness to our own destruction upon where many of us go unknown truly forever in depths of time, in the depths of death.
I know that I cannot give in or give up on a dream of a people’s dream where the buffalo in our young hearts and minds may roam around free and where the wolf warrior chief may rise above all odds and become thy greatest modern day warrior, the people seek him, the people crave him, the people need him, the people need someone to rise if not geographically the worldwide mentally.
FROM DREAMS OF DREAMS OF THE SEA AND ME
(FOR TONI M.)
Standing, staring seaward,
Sore eyes see the horizon resting content
On the frothing pillows of the beaconing sea;
Here I stand consumed in the web
Of lingering thoughts spun from dreams of dreams
Somehow always dreaming back to me:
Drifting dreams deferred.
The sun peeks out under shades of clouds reflecting
Sable apparitions: Beautiful blackbirds’ breasts
Gleam with ebony luster:
Sweet silent stares shatter.
The chilled ocean breeze conjures
Whispering echoes of screams:
Ancestral moans and groans echo
From the bowels of sunken ships;
Staring seaward, stepping sand
Backwards, I leave fading footprints.
The echoes follow.
Heart flutter hopes
like wind scattered leaves
tangled in dream twigs
By breezy adversity
Clinging and clutching to branches of memory
of yesterday's sunshine in torrents today
Glimmers so golden they flicker so faerie
As dream dazzled tears yet drip in dismay
Tempering splashes of minor discomfort
Mocking the mind games while three moves ahead
What will it matter when every thing's dead
Ride with the flow living the now
In a present so tense it's teaching you how