I feel tempted, dishonest, unlawful, inadequate, sinful, and incomplete. I thrive on hate, I fixate on pain, and I dwell on jealousy, my anger becomes uncontrollable, my rage over powers me, I feel helpless. The shadow within me fills my heart with sin, the darkness dims my light, my days grow long and cruel, my nights simmer my thoughts, I cannot feel, I cannot touch, my heart has been ripped from my chest, my soul no longer exists, I am gone! They pray for my salvation, they morn my soul, they have faith that there is still a glimmer of hope that I may be saved, that I may become myself again. I wake up! A bright light overwhelms my sight, I feel peace, I can feel my heart beating, I can touch my soft skin, when the blur subsides I see a face, a face, like no other face I have ever seen, it is my lord and he has saved me.
Every time I sleep; pains on my brain'
Abolishing my heart n soul lord escort my vein
From the bounded clouds of this mournful pain
I can't predict the weather nor the range of the rain
But hope for the station of this moving train
Thou death is sometimes rude & so insane
Life remains a distance between birth & death
That exists deep down in the palms of earth
Demise, demise, demise; roll your unmerciful dice
Flutter with our lives as we stare with horrified eyes
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, statue into dense ice
Nothing panels your path nor human's wealth
Wicked calamity that neither cares of people's health
Guilty & innocent souls shall rest on your misty throne
Plans & creatures will bow & obey to the sound of your tone
Yet no grave, on the roots of earth, shall hold my corpse down
I'll dwell with divine cherubs of warmth, & wear my sacred crown
Emulating implausible angels in the closed doors of heavens town
So wipe your worthless tears, & rinse my ashes with frosty plums
Blustering monumental trumpets, accompanied by mourning drums
While the faultless treasure chest slumps down the mastery ground
As I tumble in a dim cavernous ocean aiding my soul to rebound
Gushing tears won't refurbish dull coats munched in the idols grave
Bloated hearts shall be restored by comforting pals that are brave
The sprinkling gates of heaven will sanctify my bones with streams
Consigning my precious soul to a land filled with endless dreams
Confessing all my transgressions; as I knock on the heavens door
While my corpse respite calm on the arctic layers of my odd floor
Wandering ways without whispering words.
Who would wonder why?
Wanting, waiting, wondering within.
Will witty wisps win waging wars?
With wooing wowing Women.
Wandering ways without whispering words.
family man confused
in plaid t's vapor
If it ain't the rest
It ain't the best
I'm a total mess
fill me up
Kinds lay everywhere,
With stories of the past,
Opening wide arms to share,
Helping others at last.
Easy is not the word,
To place upon the plate.
After my past is heard,
The pathos fit in fate.
Some may want,
The descriptions clear,
Or some may recieve the haunt;
Of the visions giving off fear.
Lost souls are out,
As I met a few,
Swerving past-to a different route,
Away from eyes I once knew.
Why-Is a question to ask,
But one I very-rarely do,
Instead I make a task,
To get to know you.
Hope and faith; together to shake,
For the situations given,
In your shoes I'll make,
My best to make a liven'.
You may not be here,
Leaving left a tear,
Now to succeed is a MUST.
Your name is writtin' down,
On my arm,
Like an angel with a crown,
All pasts are now no harm.
Death happens; on command,
Leaving wasn't easy; no,
The words said last now stand,
To leave your story to show.
An Abashment, Am I? Angel
To my Troubled Tears?
Leaving them Linger, Live Long
a Life Lacking Love?
a World of Wounds that Wakes
What never Wanted to Wake?
’Wait’, Word that Weakens
Every Ember of Ecstasy
Shaking, Shivering, Screaming
my Lifeless tears Lamenting
Mourning for More Maturity
Begging for a Blissful Bond
Their hearts Throbbed Terribly..
I Am An Abashment, Angel
To my Troubled Tears
I Do Deserve their Disrespect
For I Didn’t Dare to Dream
for I Have Hindered, not Healed
the Wounds of a Waiting World…
Why after all of my mistake ridden years
Have I been granted the eyes of truth?
I see beauty in so many different ways
Than I ever did before, my song sounds
Sweeter than it ever did, and the echoes
Of my incoming evening tide, though near
Are far away on a horizon of waiting dreams,
And my soul feels as light as the rising dawn.
Why did those passing whispers of forever
Decide to nest in the furthermost corners
Of my grieving heart, and what gave their
Salve such a sweetly healing holy touch,
That lit me up like a smile on a rainy day?
And why are my footprints still in the sand
So far away from yesterday? I feel as if
I am still walking with you like I always did.
What makes a sunset turn into a psalm, and
Why do rainbows comfort my eyes, like one
Day when I was young, I saw the sun down
A wishing well, and when I got home, I looked
In the mirror, and a rainbow was etched across
My face, and its colours were so gentle a reminder
Not to let my heart grow drab and grey again, yet
Rainbows never can be born without a touch of rain…