Love hurts and people change. Things go wrong and things get strange. But life goes on and you only life it once. Be strong cause things will get better over the months. I thought I was heartbroken, I thought you were my world. You fooled me though, made me think I was your only girl. But all along, you didnt care. Im not sure, your were even completely there. But now I've moved on, when I thought it was impossible. I had to be the bigger person in this breakup, I was responsible. I let it get to me, but I didnt let it ruin me completely. I didnt do anything about the hurt you caused me, I acted so sweetly. I let you walk all over me, I tried to ignore how you disrespected me. But when I ended things, the pain was easier to see.
I miss the way you hugged me when I cried and how you told me how you loved me
every night but now you won't even look at me and you don't even talk to me
anymore and when I'm upset you just laugh and walk away........... All I want to
know is what did I do that was so bad that you treat me like a punching bag........ I
miss the way you kissed me but I guess you've moved on and I try boy do I try but
your all I dream about all I think about is you, you were my world and now your
gone I'm so lost without you I cry every night because someone will say your
name....... What I miss most of all is that I could tell you anything but now you won't
even listen.............. What kills me is you saying goodbye for good goodbye god
those words kill me every time good bye good bye good bye....
i could sit here. day in and day out
thinking of the most proper way
to let the ink in the pen spill out
but as of late im feeling prehistoric
so much weight on my shoulders
and i dont know where to go
resuscitate my soul
look back up and head to the goal
so much evil around. i feel like the devils workin double shifts just to bring me down.
on the road to redemption
you can take a seat up in the front section
just so you can feel the emotions
in this electric notion
i've done a lot of things that hide the halo
let it all collaborate when i medicate
now look at me, mind workin like plato
formulate a new path to take so i can
maneuver through all the mistakes
we all know we cant change what we've already made
but we can change the next thing we create
startin to sound like a serenity prayer
5 steps till im thirty
and the twenty four before i was never a player
found out when the lights came back on im strictly a lover
its the strongest drink for your soul, when its thirsty
so careful how much you intake or be left hungover
even worse be the one she ran over
i dont mean to come off like im too deep
but the obstacles made there way through just to scrape through
and leave me suffocating
just for me to re-invent a new way to breathe, re-decorating
is your life so complicated
you rather wet up your pillows and revoke from the life you live
just think of your kids mourning
theyll never see that pretty face in the morning any more
cheer your self up
you got a lot to live for
your a gem and im that friend
trynna appraise the value
that you dont see inside of you
just another day for him
searchin wonderin what his purpose is
running in circles
till he found a way through all the turbulence
You send bolts through my skin
something I was never to
accomplish with you, when I
saw you it's like my heart sank
to my stomach and I was in
shock my body still my body
heavy felt like when I moved I
was about to fall to my knees
you make me want to get
inside my brain pick you up and
take you out pick you one by
one like a flower because I do
love you and love you not.
Thank you for the beautiful memory
you left on my mind
you are not dead
but you are not here,
to me you are gone,
cos i cant feel you the way i used to,
everything you used to do are left untouched
the space you ocupied is empty,
our yesterday is fading away like the rainbow
so beautiful but so short,
how can i forget the endless yesterday?
when you are here with me.
in loving memory of my sister (you are not an angel but you did what an angel can do,you fly to heaven.)
Does this darkness have a name?
Does this hatred and cruelty have no mercy?
Why do we make fun of those who look ugly..... What is happening to us judging others by their clothes and looks.... Who are we to judge?????
You think you have everything but you’ve got nothing if you kept judging others by their looks…... Have a heart for once... What are we doing..??? Have you ever asked yourself this question....??!! What am I doing..??!! We lost our humanity We are not humans anymore If we kept doing the same stupid (bullying) every day...??!! Don't call yourself human if you kept talking badly about others... Weak people are living in their own shadows We consumed all our breath creating the darkness for the weak people... Does this darkness have a name?! Is it your name ???? Is it my name ???? Is it humanity’s name ???? Someone answer me ..!!?? Why are we harassing others ?????
Why don't we just avoid all this and live a happy life ?????
I'm writing now oh big bro
Oh! sorry I forgot, yes you said no
To say goodbye and to let you know
That you'll be on my mind wherever I
Well you know I'll never be ur pussy
cat nor teddy bear
Whatever you wanna call me now...I
You think you're the one who's hurt,
well you're wrong dear
The truth is that I'm the one suffering
No no plz dnt you ever apologize
I'm the one who's sorry for telling
To you?! Yeah right that's what you
have always thought
But I was lying to myself believe it or
No more stories,no more pain
Gonna spread my wings, fly in the
Now each one is going his own way
Well that is all I have to say
If you change your mind I'll be
waiting for you
Ready do hear and forgive like I
The fact is you'll never know what
you did to me
Though I'll never consider you as an
Oh how I wish to hear from you
Saying, sister come close to me,
together we will run the world.
AT THE MIDLE OF A NIGHT
I wake up to unusual ringtone
I rise to pick up my phone
One eyed half open,
I stretch out my hands down my pillow
I clean my throat ready to say “hallo”
My right thumb on the screen to slide the green icon
But….there is no message or a missed call
Oh my God, I forgot that I never had you’re new number at all
Because you’re gone- my sweetie
So reluctantly, I have to go back to sleep
I try to find the easiest
way not to cry,
but tears falls
even when i am laughing
and you cant tell
that i am hurt
because i am
I feel like I'm living someone elses life, a life in strife. I've been strong, but when will I belong. I feel so alone, but I'm doing ok on my own. I can't describe the pain, but I keep in mind every storm runs outa rain. I use to think our love was unbeatable, but really its unforgettable. Everyday I walk down memory lane, trying to ignore the pain. He crosses my mind everyday, when will all this go away. There's gotta be something more, my heart is becoming sore. My momma doesn't have to worry, because I'm not sorry. I know he made the mistake, and he's the reason I have this heartache. What we had, was bad. I shouldn't have let it go that far, your just another scar.
Little Kinley Raine warrior of light,
When you came into this world
You came in ready to fight.
Our thoughts were full of Prayers
hoping for you to have a chance,
Although we were on a mental coaster
We held our ground with a positive stance.
After a Month God decided it was to soon
for you to stay with us and bloom,
It's hard for all of us but we understand
other plans were in-store for you.
My little niece meeting you was a pleasure,
I wish we could've spent more time together.
Kinley we love you and miss your adorable
face, When you get a chances to sneak away
come back down here and give us a spiritual
Embrace. R.I.P Kinley Raine.
Entranced in thought.
Ghost of the future.
As the hood comes down!!
YOU SAY ID MISS YOU
YET ID GIVE THE WORLD TO DISMISS US TO
THE THINGS I ONCE BELIEVED WERENT AT ALL TRUE
CERTAIN THINGS WERE
ONCE SO VERY NEW
SO NOW ITS TIME TO GET REAL
FIRST YOU TAKE AND THEN YOU STEAL
YOULL MAKE THOSE TOYS YOUR NEXT MEAL
YOUR LIES ARE OUT
MAINLY BECAUSE NOTING GOOD EVER
COMES FROM YOUR MOUTH
SAID YOU NEVER LEARNED TO LOVE
BUT INTILL I CAME ALONG YOU WERE JUST ANOTER LIVING THUG
SO QUICK TO BELEVE YOUR LOVE FELL FROM ABOVE
I HAVE NO THOUGHTS OF US
THER ALL GONE EVEN SO MUCH AS OUR TRUST
BECAUSE OUR LOVE WASINT ENOUGH IT WAS TO MUCH
AND WHEN I HELD IT IN I WAS SO AFRIAD I MIGHT BUST
SO I LET IT ALL OUT AND FORGOT TO TRUST
Sometimes I like to pretend, things never came to a end. But over time, our love became a crime. I didn't know what we had, would ever end so bad. But then I knew things weren't right, when we started to fight. Now I walk down memory lane all the time, the pain is worst then committing a crime. We only caused eachother pain, but we were eachothers maine. I thought things would be alright, but I cried alot that night. I don't want things to change, without you my life is strange. You said you wanted me so much it started to hurt that you couldn't wait, now im just another person you hate. When you said you didn't care, I knew the person I loved was no longer there. You aren't the same, the new you is lame. We both fell, now it's hell. You use to always be here for me, like family. But now your nowhere in sight, things aren't right. Empty is all that I can feel, I still can't believe this is real. I didn't mean to let you get away, I didn't know what to say. Am i with the right guy, or am i telling myself a lie. I was afraid to loose what we had, but to you that choice was bad.
I really hate this feeling, sometimes I wish I could stop breathing. I don't wanna try, just leave me here to die. You were the thing that made my life living for, but your no longer mine anymore. I feel so much pain, sometimes I believe I'm going insane. I'm missing what we had, although it was bad. I'm always walking down memory lane, why can't you see my pain? I know people change, &&' things get strange. I guess I gotta face it, she's my new replacment. I can't believe it's really over this time, I feel as if i have commited a crime. I live in a world of sorrow, so I don't ever worry about tomorrow. I didn't even have time to cry, because i had already said bye. I feel like I'm digging a deeper whole, so I'm hoping Jesus will take control. I'm sorry for my dumb mistake, but baby now I'm wide awake.
People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?
Why has this life become so meaningless,
that we just want to throw it away?
We become selfish and think our life is so bad,
dont think of others who's lives are worse, But still greatful for what they have.
People take for granted the things they've got,
clothes, food, smokes and shoes, even a roof or a bed,
They dont think of the homeless,
the hungry, not even the cold or the hot.
They just think they want to be dead,
Things happen in our lives that, to us, seem bad.
We dont look for help or trust any "friends"
All because of the past we've had.
Dont be a coward and run away,
Stick it out, Live life,
I know that there's alot of strife,
But stick it through day to day.
People want to commit suicide,
people choose to die over livin life.
Why has it come to be this way?....
I'm feeling down, &&' I'm already on the ground. I cant get any lower, my patience is getting slower. I've already hit the floor, &&' I'm becoming sore. I'm not sure where I went wrong, but now I dont belong. I'm like the unknown, all alone. This feeling is unbarable, the pain is unbelievable. I'm ready to walk out the door, I can't take no more. This is why I don't trust, I always get pushed in the dust. Now I got to cover my eyes, &&' ignore all your lies. I've been left in the rain, I've felt the pain. I knew things were wrong, but I stayed along. Now I'm here all alone, waiting for the sound of my phone. I wouldn't wish for my worst enemy to feel this way, that's what I have to say. I didn't really have a choice, now I'm missing the sound of your voice. I made mistakes that wont fade, not even with a blade. My heart isn't bullet proof, &&' that's the truth.
A marble calm under the shaky gaze
was parsing the human pain. I would
lift the calculated grief from folded earth.
You feel badly bruised and racial war
becomes anathema. Past the age eyesight dwindles,
cannot identify the faces of dead.
O my God ! Bizarred bloated eyes filled
with blood were groping for the fallen walls.
Who had dug the garden with grenades ?
A theme hunger separates the hearts. When
desert was the bed for daughters and sons,
the fathers were shaking with hate.
The shine wears off the love. A different world
under the lids. Miracle does not happen.
We were searching for the doors.
From beginning to end there was love
this we know.
At a nights fall a dove flew,
she had to grow.
All that was built was falling and a return was long gone.
Time was of essence and no more words were needed,
Strange auras were afloat and all was lost.
Pain now fills one and regret fills another,
Soon truth will prevail and all will be at rest.
Untill it sheds some light one must forget,
One must forgive and see that no matter what
There was love beginning to end.
I'm not the first I know
But will I be the last
This dirty side you show
We've definitely moved to fast
Who else has been here
Do the faces blur into one
Everything now is coming clear
And no I'm not having fun
You wish you had a doll instead of a girl
Never returning to the last
Your touch now makes my toes curl
A sickening feeling from the past
What did they have that I don't
Not much to offer I guess
You told me to scream but I won't
The blood makes such a mess
She was the women you loved
A replacement you work to create
Your hands both tightly gloved
You tell me I'm lucky number eight
Ashamed and naked I lay
For all the world to see
Someday I'll make you pay
In the next life it may be
They wonder where I am
No one would ever expect
This lion prays on a lamb
Your last prize to collect
A place I've never seen
And still will not
Your hands have been scrubbed clean
The desert I lay in is hot
3 years to find my body
My best years are gone
They make you sound gaudy
And turn me into a delicate swan
Plucked from her prime of life
To let rot and decay
All for the love of your wife
Whose body next to, I do lay
MY heart and mind are at war
My heart and my mind are at war,
Body and soul lost between the hate,
Confused and hurt not knowing what for,
They pull, twist and fight to escape,
The battle of pain sweat and tears,
Caught in the midst of heartache,
My soul breaks free and leaves behind its fears,
The pain is too much for my body to take,
I built a wall and smashed it to dust,
For another, but for what,
I lost my faith and lost her touch,
I am soulless standing here stuck,
My mind has won this war,
My heart damaged and broke,
Still not knowing what for,
I pray and i still hope,
That this war will end,
And mind and heart will coincide,
Hoping my soul and body will mend,
For the rest of me has already died
I am done with the pain of passion,
And done with the love of pain,
All i here is my hearts door's crashing,
For this is what makes a man go insane,
I felt her love i loved her touch,
I kissed her lips and she kissed my heart,
Now this feeling, i feel too much,
Now it’s time for my mind and heart to part,
I will see her eyes in the moon lit sky,
Her beauty in a sky of wonder,
I will shed one tear and let the pain die,
As i lay awake in a world of loveless slumber
The illusions of love corrupted my mind,
The confusion of passion clouded my eyes,
The death of my heart came soon this time,
So now i will love in a world of my demise,
You can’t feel this pain that i feel,
I am done trying and this time i am,
When i write i write what’s real,
So now can you see why my soul ran?
Can you stop and wonder,
How i made it so far, with so much pain,
Can you here my heart crack with thunder,
And can you see i live in a world of rain,
I have sought love found it and lost i
I am tired of pain. so tired my heart is exhausted
i am done now if she comes back then i am here,
if not like i said i have shed my one and only tear
Lean back and watch your move.
Don't over react. You look like a fool.
Wondering why you suddenly appear,
When I have nothing left to feel.
Hold back! I don't need your words.
Take a huge leap back to when it hurts.
No. It cannot deceive me again.
Been through it putting into an end.
Turn back now and walk away!
There's no place left for you to stay.
I've already packed you all my goodbyes,
But never again the tears I once cried.
When am all alone
Feeling so lost
People I called friends
Too late to realise they weren't
People I could trust and confide,
People I could talk to,
And with then, my mind share,
So long has it been,
To far has it come,
Their ways to make mine,
And mine not theirs,
An incarnation of a different person...
But, I am me,
Tall and proud,
With no one to drag around,
Yes, mistakes are inevitable,
But when one is swollen with pride,
Too much that they don't realise it's a nuisance,
Does this whole thing become so distant,
And the once cordial relationship crumbles.
My friends accept me for who I am,
What I am,
And what I stand for,
And not anytime soon am I about to change.
Sorry for the broken link,
You ain't got nothing on me,
And I gotta go my own way.
As you read my mind you sing our song for the last time
I realize why I fight through all the lies
And jumped through your impossible hoops
For your voice brings me peace in a world full of war
And your touch slowly creeps
On a heart with ice to its core
You stare into my eyes with love you can no longer hide
And for a moment I forgot this was good bye
As my heart longs for your kiss
You remind me that my thoughts are not just my own
And you kiss me like your heart has finally found its home.
The thought of this being the last slips away
As hope burns through my brain
You hold me like I'm your dying wish
Reality falls on me like a ton of bricks
As we pull away, and your words that brought me peace
Sends me to a dark obis
I love you baby I promise I do
But I love her too goodbye
i have broken her heart
She has torn my shirt
She was i got
But now she is gone
Gone foreal i dont
Know what to do
she made my days better
It seems i made hers bitter
At night she was my glitter
But i treated her like a litter
I feel guilty like osama bin laden
Who will take this burden
I wish i had wings like a raven
Or i had powers to change the number of
days in a year to seven
From day one i knew she was my match
We have been great with only scratches on
She has used on me more than a milli bucks
And all i wish her is good luck
My outside smile doesn’t match on the inside
Growing up all I wanted was a dad by my side
But I never had you in my life
Sit with my pad and I write
That’s what hurts the most
I went on a search for you father
It would have been easier to search for ghosts
What made it harder
Is you had a chance to be a dad
But you rejected it
I’m trying to advance through the sad
While accepting it
I needed you the most
Now I’m not affectionate
To anyone who tries to get close
People always leave. I’m expecting it
Talk about my dad I act like I don’t miss him
But it’s eating me up inside
Can my feelings be justified?
How could I say goodbye
When you ****ing died
When we rarely said a simple hi
We got to see each other a few times a year
You turned up drunk. Blind from beer
At times I wish I could rewind to there
But I let my smile out shine my tears
The death of you was the birth of me
I try and figure what’s best to do
But people see the worst in me
Sober and clean
They want the dirt on me
A coward is something I’ll never be
But a boy in need of a dad I’ll probably forever be
Everything I’m yet to achieve. And everything I already have
Will it make up for never having a dad?
Let me take you through my timeline
To the days before our paths crossed
Before the sun shined
When it was all dark and lonely
And I prayed fervently for a streak of light
That would sweep me of my feet
That was then
Seasons have come and gone
You have taken the darkness
My prince charming
Yet sadly you must go again
But I could not forget you reflection
This should never be goodbye
They think they understand,
they think they know the pain.
They try to guilt me into
doing what they say.
I am not scared to leave,
I am scared to stay.
The pain in my chest,
will never go away.
I am alone
in this cold, dark world.
No one to live for-
no one to die with.
My life is a time-bomb,
I am destined to explode.
The clock’s ticking on,
I have nothing to live for.
Empty rifts in space
I see your cold smiling face a useless reflection I've lost your connection
our hearts that once beat in sync has drifted your pulse getting softer as I breathe in your scent.
Your hand slipping and all I can do is watch your beauty fade
if I could I'd reach inside suck the poison out make everything ok but as my last memory fades all I can see is empty space but your silhouette always remains
I'll go on with my life
What you took from me
Just gave me insight.
I am stronger,smarter more confident too
What you took from me
Has made me brand new.
My eyes are open
My heart is safe
I am now in a whole new phase.
I choose to be happy
More cautious,it seems
I won't change me, to play anyones schemes.
I'll smile,live and love
No one will take that away
I'm the best of me
and I'll stay that way.
Self preservation, isn't easy
But in life,it's needed
What more can we do.
A lesson learned ,never to late in life
Live,love and be happy
It's a beautiful life.
The sun,the moon, the water that flows
The green grass and flowers,just watching them grow.
The snow in winter,cold air we breathe
Self preservation,is a beautiful thing.
What you took from me was more than a dream
It happpened in life
But was a goodthing.
I'm a survivor, you're in the past
Self preservation, has gotten me through...
So all I can say is "I Thank You".....