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Funny Time Poems | Funny Poems About Time

These Funny Time poems are examples of Funny poems about Time. These are the best examples of Funny Time poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Couplet | |

Horse From Mars


It came from the sky, a gray silver stallion.
I looked up high, and I have also seen a dragon.

With so many things in this universe.
I'm on stand-by with a camera in my purse. 

Who would have known I'd be the first to spot a PEGASUS.
The town folks wave hi every time I walk my hippopotamus.

I enjoy showing everyone, my pictures of a flying horse.
I don't see why they call a DOCTOR every time I call the TASK FORCE

I think they are jealous over all the things I've seen.
They act all crazy since I sighted a LEPRECHAUN when I was fourteen.

No one ever believed me when I saw an army of dragonflies.
They have a name for me "the boy who See's too much in the skies!"

I don't know why they can't see what I see.
For all I know they are all experiments under Alien Technology.

They don't believe me how I got this magic MEDALLION.
It was a friendly gift from the silver stallion.

I also have many pictures of a  UNICORN.
We became best-friends when he gave me a piece of its magic horn.

We sat together while he drank from the lake.
We enjoyed talking, --talking about how U.F.O.'s are fake.

Why can't they see? The day I fell off a boat, I got rescued by a MERMAID!
Who would have known a mermaid swim around with first-aid.

I also remember the day I followed a LEPRECHAUNS.
We were playing under the rainbow having so much fun.

When I told my doctor about all the things I've seen.
He locked me in a DUNGEON, thinking I was the ALIEN QUEEN.

I begged and I told him I don't believe in any type of alien.
Too bad the master of this dungeon came from another region.

In a way he looks like that one SILVER STALLION from Mars.
The first creature I'd seen the day I fell off the monkey bars.

I have this picture of this horse of course.
JUST help me out of this white-jacket!!! ;-)
If you want to see the coolest picture of a flying horse. 

(A small collaboration with: B-Boy)

re-post for ~FUNNY CONTEST

Details | Light Poetry | |

" Ike and Jane "- sequence 2

The name's Ike.
Some a ya might a met me before,
in my very first write,
and knew me as the stalker with the walker.
"Retired Romance" was the name,
Spoke about meetin' my wife,
She's here with me, name is Jane.
I likes ta call her the Mrs.,
cause I never thought that would happen again.
Now she like ta near smother me with kisses,
but gives me room ta write now and then.
We had us one of them honeymoons,
she says it ain't over yet.
But dang, if'n it ain't over soon,
we'll have ta call me in a vet!

Ennyways, I wanted ta give y'all a heads up
that I'll be a writin' from time to time .
We'd like ta thank y'all for the nice thumbs up,
'bout our first little Retired Romance rhyme,
and let y'all know that me and the Mrs. .. well..
.                                                  ..we doin' just fine !
.                  "Nite nite darlin."

Details | Rhyme | |

Santa Jack

With Christmas time coming
It's time to call Jack
Sears needs a Santa
to get the Families back

They look for his number
It's no where to be found
They look in all the drawers
Managers buzzing all around

Then almost like magic
Who walks through the door
Sure enough it's Jack
no need to search anymore

His boots are all shiney
His beard white as snow
He looks like Santa's twin
His eyes even glow

Retail season is saved
The people coming in today
Will get to see Santa Jack
And put gifts on Lay Away

The children all love him
They don't give him a break
Poor Santa Jack has to go
His knees start to shake

He drops little Johny 
Jumps over some trees
Slipping on a present 
He falls down on his knees

The real Santa's watching
Down in the North Pole
A special gift for Santa Jack
This year he won't get Coal

Perhaps a red new suit
with some non slip boots
No more nasty stains
When Santa Jack gets the toots

For Carol Eastman's Christmas Contest.
I think the kids will enjoy Santa Jack.

Dedicated to my friend Jack, a jolly old soul who's never lived at the North Pole.

Details | Narrative | |

And The Road Begins?

Mornings are dreadful time in life unless waking beside gorgeous woman hopefully 
a not married one  husbans can be such a downer.
And when ya wake to a warm beautiful creature by your side.
And the first thought that comes to your mind is i wonder whats for breakfest.

Then ya probaly cant read the menu to start with and desserve 
to have a oversized weight lifter re arrange your ribs.

Im a southern man once means several things  non of which means im normal.
And this morning finds my yerning for a trip and widespread  mischief.
My amigo had vanished after are trip south of the boarder I remember saying 
to myself as i watched him  running naked across the dessert  being chased 
by the flying monkeys  he was surley seeing after his consumption of a foreign substance 

There goes a fine american.

I would have ran after him  but  but i didnt want thoose things to turn there attention to me 
I herd they had a thing for southern  actscents.
And theres nothing  worse than a bunch of horney flying monkeys trust me 
Ive delt with this problem  befor.

and being it was happy hour i knew my slightly insane amigo would understand 
in all his naked glory.
Besides  I left him some sneakers  and a sixpack.
And kept his credit card for safe keeping.

Naked men have no place to keep credit cards and I figured he was in no state to handle 

So as i sit  behind  the wheel  ready to to get lost in the madness of fast food and
  the ant hill of insanity that is wall mart i turn my thoughts to vegas.
For where would a lost nude slightly insane person  run to and feel at home.

I had turn the music up to drown out the sound of whoever was in the trunk.
I figured if i had put sombody in there  in a drunken moment.
It had to be for a good reason.

And so with slightly hungover mindset are road begins.
and so with that do the games also.
And i figured hanging around with a cops wife wasnt the smartest idea.
That and im allergic to bullets.

My muse and 16 year old spirtiual advisor had phoned me to say that.
I probaly needed to Invest in the spirt of Jack Daniels  today.
And hey she had went to church more than once  so who was I to argue.

With a five five spitfire by the name of tinker.
so with A unknown companion in the trunk not helping my hangover i was off
to the races  Untill next time kiddies. 
Adios and im off to find my amigo.

Details | Lyric | |

Yard Sale Cowboy On CD

From here to wherever, I'll follow a yard sale sign,
it's a past time endeavor, for my collective state of mind,
I may buy some furniture, or a trinket for a dime,
yard saling is a pleasure, yes, a personal hobby of mine,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
and it gives me great joy, to see a yard sale sign,
from here to wherever, cloudy days or sunshine,
I'm searching for that treasure, ain't no telling what I'll find,

I may find brand new things, boots, shoes, or clothes the right size,
silver and gold chains or rings, or an antique will catch my eyes,
I could find my brother a nice bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
or maybe a nice piece of furniture, or something for a friend of mine,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
and it gives me great joy, to see a yard sale sign,
It's a past time endeavor, for my collective state of mind,
Yard saling is a pleasure, ain't no telling what I"ll find,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, I just spotted a yard sale sign,
searching is a pleasuree, ain't no telling what I'll find,
I may find an old bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
now one thing is for sure, I just found my cat a ball of twine,
and look here, I found my ol' dog a bone to grind,

Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
I may find an old bass lure, or a spool of fishing line,
from here to wherever, cloudy days or sunshsine,
I'm a yard sale cowboy, on the trail of search and find,
Yea, I'm a yard sale cowboy, ain't no telling what I'll find,

Hey Bud, how much for that there what-cha-ma-call-it?
Naw Naw, Naw, that there thing-a-ma-jig, there next to that do-ma-flitchie,
Yea, Yea, that thinga-ma-jig right there.....ya say three
I'll take ya go.....and how much for that do-daddy over there?
Yea, yea, right next to those 2 onion skin tires...Uh Huh..yea..well I'll be..
Well yea..I'll take it's something I just can't live without...ha ha ha..

Details | Narrative | |

To All Four-legged AND Two-legged

Hello to all four-legged and two-legged friends in the big world
The people who take care of us, do not know as much as they think
We are probably smarter than they are
Take for example, that little cell phone that our people
always have with them wherever they go
What we do.....lift the foot and "send a message" to a friend
When I am out and walking with my people I get many interesting "messages"
Some "messages" are very interesting and take a little longer time to "read"
Then my people impatient, pulling and struggling the leash
What they can not understand that I must "answer" to all "messages"
Our "conversations" and "messages" are equally important
Think about it....they are also free....there is no expense
When their cell phone call or pling they take time to respond
Hello all two-legged humans our messages are just as important as yours

A-L Andresen

Details | Limerick | |

December 21, 2012

The world as we know it will end!
This warning the Mayans did send
But yes there's still time
After reading this rhyme
To honor Black Friday and spend

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Optimistic Pessimists Resolutions

Get in shape, lose some weight. Every year it’s always the same. Read a book, stay home and cook, And I only have myself to blame. Till some land, lend a hand. You’d think that I’d be smart enough, Cards to send to a sick friend, To ignore this self-improvement stuff. Get more sleep, don’t sell cheap. But it is an annual institution, Take a class, use less gas. To make a New Year’s resolution. Eat less meat, be more discrete, Why must they always be so hard? Be more caring, try more sharing, This time of year puts me on my guard. Be more polite, sleep at night, I wish for an easy way I will confess. Work hard all day, don’t over stay, To keep the resolutions that I express. Only say what you mean today, What if I only made an easy pick? Do your best to skew the test, Then my word would surely stick. Eat more snacks, take more naps, I’ll confuse my karma and trick it. Watch TV, look out for me, This might be just the ticket. Stay up late while cheating fate, This is a New Year’s revolution, I’ll make my list then I’ll insist, That I keep this year’s resolution. And when it’s time to stay in line, But my promises I fail to keep. I’ll not hide as I backslide, As the benefits I will reap. I’ll be complete whenever I cheat, And by default I’ll do what I should. It won’t make me sad when I do bad, Because my failing will only do me good.

Details | Rhyme | |

His Nose

The nose he wears sits on his head
It's big and round and very red;
And in the dark it always glows
It must be awful to own that nose.
There's two dark holes filled with hair
With whatever else that's hidden there;
Each time I see with great surprise
That glow that sits between his eyes.
It shines as though when night meets day
There never could be another way;
I wonder too if he can tell
If red affects his sense of smell. 
Perhaps the problem is I think
He's had in time too much to drink;
I suggested then to paint it white
And he seemed to think this was alright.

For Frank Herrera's Zaniest Poetry Contest
Elizabeth Wesley

Details | Light Poetry | |

Its Christmas Time in Dodge City

(To the tune of Silver Bells) Wooden sidewalks, and the shop fronts, Dressed in wild western style In the jail there’s a feeling of Christmas Cattle mooing, cowboys shooting Riding mile after mile And down at the Long Branch you hear Silver spurs, silver spurs It’s Christmas time in Dodge City Jing-a-ling, saloon girls sing Soon it will be Christmas day. Mobs in street fights try to stay polite While they bleed red and scream As the towns folk rush home To take cover Hear the jaws crunch See the kids bunch It’s Matt Dillon’s big scene As he catches the rustlers you’ll hear Silver spurs, silver spurs It’s Christmas time in Dodge City Jing-a-ling, saloon girls sing Soon it will be Christmas day. Silver spurs, silver spurs Soon it will be Christmas day. Soon it will be Christmas day.
When we travel in the car we sing to the radio. The other night, Silver Bells came on and I sang Dodge City to make my wife laugh.

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Christmas Paradox

Merry Christmas and all that stuff and don’t forget to write, Now if you would all be on your way I’d like a silent night. It’s not that I haven’t enjoyed your stay, I have you must believe me, I just wish that it were over now because your leaving would relieve me. I’d like to say that the magic of this day would be with me until I die, But out of respect for the holiday I feel that it would be wrong to lie. I’ve spent the time following you around and picking up after your kids, Putting food back in the refrigerator and closing up all of the lids. I’ve even picked up your smelly socks after making Christmas dinner, While you’ve all gotten fat it seems that I’ve grown that much thinner. But when next year comes you’d better be here to visit with Santa Claus, Don’t tell me that you’ll spend Christmas time over at your in-laws. Because Christmas is a family time and we all should be together, And you can tell your in-laws that you’ll be theirs on Arbor Day forever.

Details | Rhyme | |


Many years ago, when we were all young,
We really thought life, would be so much fun.
While playing dress-up, trying on mom’s stuff,
Putting on make-up, we found to be tough.

Then came our schooling, and boy things would change,
“Those aren’t our parents”, when they acted strange.
Sometimes they were hip, but old-fashioned too,
That’s something I swore, I would never do.

Wishing you were older, adults had it made,
They would do nothing, yet still would be paid.
That is how little, we all had known,
We surely found out, once we were grown.

Loving the twenties, we’d go out with friends,
When we went shopping, we followed the trends.
Doing what we wanted, and staying out late,
It didn’t matter, what time we all ate.

Then came the thirties, and most of us wed,
Watch what you wish for, my parents had said.
We had to work hard, many bills to pay,
I guess they were right, what more can I say?

Raising your children, was hardest of all,
Needing some advice, your parent’s you’d call.
It seemed so easy, they needed no rest,
So now it’s your turn, you learned from the best.

The forties arrived, that was a shocker,
We’d spend lots of time, just at the doctor.
Back aches and headaches, so tired you’d be,
Trying not to cough, or else you would pee.

The fifties would come, and your grandkids too,
Where were your glasses? You hadn’t a clue.
You searched here and there, and under the bed,
“Hey grandma” they laughed, “They’re right on your head”.

Here come the sixties, now let’s have some fun,
You are retired; your work is all done.
To dinner with friends, you dressed and you wait,
They never show up, you have the wrong date.

Now the seventies, with friends playing games,
If only you could, remember their names.
You try hard to hide, those under-eye bags,
Gravity happens, and everything sags.

Enjoy every day, and have a good laugh,
All the steps you took, led down a new path.
Live life as it comes, each year a new page,
One thing is for sure, everyone will age.

Details | Ode | |

Ode to Trevor

We'd really like to thank you
i'm sure you left it here with love,
it really was so kind of you
but we didn't want your bug.

We thought you'd like to know
we really felt the pits
we thought of you quite often
when we had the squits.

Next time you come to visit
please leave your bugs at home,
'cause, when you bring them with you
they sure do like to roam.

So next time that we see you
I hope you come alone,
you can bring Rosie and Katie
but leave your bugs at home.

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Man in the Mirror

My father-in-law went through this phase with his Alzheimer's.

We’ve recently noticed that grandpa has made himself a friend,
We’re pretty sure that this one will stay with him until the end.

The new guy has his room right next door to my grandpa’s place,
And every time my gramps stands at the window he can see his face.

It seems that the two of them are as compatible as can be,
And they both decorate the same as near as gramps can see.

Gramps visits with his friend to share iced tea and a smile,
Until they both run out of steam and decide to nap for a while.

They make a pretty good team they’re just like day and night,
The new guy uses his left hand and Gramps prefers his right.

And Grandpa never looks in the window just to stand and stare,
But every time he walks past the thing the other guy is there.

Grandpa says the only thing about this guy that might turn into a curse,
Is that the guy is so good looking and he might steal away the nurse.

Details | Verse | |

Enigma's Calling

Extraordinary, I am 
Craving for unusual thoughts
Endless exploration without boundary
Understanding  the gift I shouldn't fought
Invisible drawings in my mind
Playing with the words in my head
My passion
The food of my soul
I feel so lucky
The random thoughts
A lifetime companion
A self esteem builder
A goal planner
Be my forever life saver
I write more
I talk less
I want to please
I chose to bore
What tickles me the most
Is to know what I'm for
Thinking is my love
When  my mind goes empty
That's when I hate
My day dreaming lust
Organizing things in my mind
Playing roles of simulation
Where images of art is my vision
And words of attitude is my heart

Details | Free verse | |

Bending Spoons


...A poem
is a spoon
that you can bend
with your mind.

It depends on psi
if you 
are mutant 
X or Y 
a paranormal opportunity 
or a wild talent
of psionic penmanship .

Stare at the pattern 
on the handle
as you imagine 
the handle
either roses or unicorns
are emblazon here.

So much the better
as your mind
bends the words
and the metal obeys...

Spoon begins to tremble
there is no knife
to run away with.

Then comes
the period
like an empty plate.
to contain
a bent spoon
with squeezed letters...

Details | Ode | |

Quips My EX GIRLFRIEND revisited

     1.   My ex-girlfriend tried to impress me when
          She told me that she is "Fasting"!  And I knew
          That she was true because, I saw just how
          Fast she ate that basket of chicken.......

      2.  The next time that she told me that she was "Fasting"
           It was three (03) double meat Whoppers!  And I have never
           Seen three (03) double meat Whoppers go so quicK......

       3. My ex-girlfriend was so upset!  She explained that when
           She was young that she could bounce a dime
           Off of her butt.  Only now, when she bounce the same dime
           It only flops!
  So, I looked on the bright side and told her that now she can
           Bounce a quarter on her belly button and it only drops!

         4. The last time that I saw her, she was "Fasting" on a
             box of cookies.
          * And boy, those (03) box's of cookies sure went fast!

Explanation: That is none sence and no one got fat in the making of this pun!
    4. I just hate it when my ex-girlfriend call's me!  Usually I keep my
       cell phone on vibrate and in my front pocket. My EX-friend
        Know's this.  She also, know's that I have a bladder problem!  Every time
        she blow's up my phone it make's me pee!
        I know that I hate it, but she give's me such a warm feeling and I take
        what I can get!

     5. My ex-girlfriend is so stupid that she can't ever give me a piece of
         her mind!  She has to get an substitute..... Ha! Ha! Ha!   He, He, He!

      6.My ex-girlfriend, She alway's cut me short!........  She wanted to give 
         me a piece of her mind, buy, she didn't have enough brain cell's left! Ha! Ha!
         Feel the Joke! Uh!


       1.  When you "Pass Gas" and you know you did........
            And no-body heard it........ Is it proper to wait for someone
            to smell it first, before you say, excuse me..........
            Is it really too late....... That is what my girlfriend doe's!

       * I would just blame it on a friend!

Moments To Share:

       My ex-girl friend and I were discussing a poem that I wrote! She told
       me that it was an perfect oxymoron.......

       I told her that she was just a moron!

Words' To Live by:
       I was trying to explaine my mis-giving's to my EX-girlfriend......
       I told her that the problem was, not that I really love you, because
       I don't!  The problem is that I just can't get you out of my mind!

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Wind in my Mind

The wind is blowing through my mind
Not gently breezing through.
It ruffles my thoughts and jumbles them
It will take time to file them anew
I like to file my thoughts in order
Of good ones and of bad
Its keeps things on a steady level
And stops one going mad

Happy thoughts are lifted
To the very fore
Memories of when we first met
You were sitting on the floor
The party was a bit of a flop
We left together and walked
And as we got to know each other
We talked and talked and talked

The wind is blowing stronger
The bad times it reminds
We split up for a lifetime
Well it seemed so in our minds
You persevered and asked me out
I decided you were true
My memory of our wedding day
And how happy I was with you

We had a little flat and furnished it with love.
The trouble was we were ground floor
And the water came in from above.

I look back through some memories
All tumbling in the breeze
The hard times the fun and laughter
The winter of the big freeze
We booked a holiday that year
The best time we ever had
I know it scared us half to death because I was so bad.
It’s a pity I missed part of it as to hospital I went
The baby we were having, to be born he seemed hell bent.

The wind is blowing on my head, now I fight with it for real
It’s just ripped off the shed roof, it looks like it’s been peeled
I better shut my memory box and find my hammer and nails
And fight with wind that’s blowing outside and stop my reminiscent gales.

Details | Couplet | |

Twenty Quid Is Twenty Quid

Bill and Blanche set off, to the 'Yorkshire Show' they did go
T'was a yearly trip, and they would always show.

Each time Bill says to Blanche ‘On that elicopter I’d like to ride.’
Blanche always replied’ but it's twenty quid Bill’ and then she and Bill sighed.

'Twenty quid is twenty quid Bill, you always told me that'
‘Tha’s right me old love,’ and he’d give his wallet a pat.

The next year Bill looked, at the elicopter, and he tried once more
‘I’m seventy-five Blanche, there not much time left for me to soar.’

‘Bill, it’s twenty quid, and twenty quid is twenty quid.
So we’ll not go on the elicopter ride, of that idea you must get rid.’

Bill looked at the elicopter and agreed twenty quid was twenty quid
Of that one idea though, he could never really get rid.

Bill was desperate to ride on that elicopter whirring thing
The pilot overheard the couple, and then he made Bill’s heart sing.

I’ll take you on board, but not one word must you say
If you keep TOTALLY quiet, not one pound or penny will you pay.

Bill and Blanche climbed on board ,for the ride of their life
Not one word did Bill utter, nor his terrified wife.

The pilot looped the loop, he dived and twisted and turned
Not one word did the pilot hear, yet even his stomach churned.

He landed and spoke to Bill and he said ‘I am impressed’
I twisted and I turned and I really tried my best.

Bill said to the pilot ‘Well I nearly gave in lad, and I nearly spoke’
‘Twas when the wife fell out, but you know us Yorkshire folk.’

I watched her spiral down; I nearly shouted, but thought that’s absurd
‘And tha knows twenty quid is twenty quid lad, and you said NOT one word.’

Taken from a joke sent to me by Jack Horne and continuing the theme Harry uses of Yorkshire Humour.
Quid Slang name for pound sterling
Yorkshire folk drop their 'h's

Details | Rhyme | |


My heart was pumping hard that day I faced the maddening crowd, 
Despite the spinning in my head I stood there mighty proud. 
Though racked with pain my reddened hand acknowledged them a wave 
And to this day I've ne'er forgot, the accolades they gave. 
It was a dream come true you see to stand there in that ring, 
For rodeo was in my blood and one day I'd be king. 
The beast I drew was mean and lean ... no Chainsaw I admit, 
But still if I could just ride time I'd show them I had grit. 
I'd limbered up behind the chute preparing for the ride, 
Well knowing what was just ahead, but took it in my stride. 
The chute boss called, "You've drawn chute five, get down and make it quick." 
Then as I eyed the beast below ... I suddenly felt sick.  
That brute it tried to climb the gate and bellowed cries of fear, 
While chute hands fought to organise the necessary gear. 
I felt the violent quiver of the hide between my chaps, 
The smell of sweat, the cry of men ... a change of mind perhaps? 
Too late I felt the rope pulled taut and shoved within my glove, 
I thought it's now or never mate and sent a prayer above. 
Then as I pulled my Colly down I yelled out, "Let him go!" 
The gate flew open ... it was on ... 'twas time to rodeo. 

With whites of eyes all full of hate that beast did twist and turn, 
'Twas obvious my frame aboard was something he did spurn. 
Eight seconds on this beast from hell seemed like eternity, 
For ev'ry muscle which I owned screamed out in agony. 

Between the jars and twists and turns I heard the crowd all cheer, 
Then at long last that blessed sound of hooter in my ear. 
The pick up man then pulled me clear and was I proud ... not half! 
I'll ne'er forget that day old mate I rode that poddy calf. 


Details | Personification | |

Customer Service...I'm Still waiting

I'm still waiting
How much time has elapsed
Think I'll read
While I'm waiting
I just read a chapter

I do believe my call is being answered
No, a voice on a machine echoes
"Your call will be taken in the order in which it was received"

What number caller was I
Probably the 1000th caller
I'll touch up my manicure
While I'm waiting

I'm still waiting
I smudged my polish on one nail
Wonder If I have time to fix it
Before they break their necks to take my call

They must be averaging one call every ten minutes
I'll continue reading

Another chapter done
I'm still waiting

Details | Rhyme | |

Don't Read This

You’re not allowed to read this poem!
Unless your name is Jeroboam.
So stop right now before you start,
A mindless poem with no heart.
No need to let your eyes a’ wander,
You must have tons of time to squander --
Looking at this awful mess,
Of verbal anecdotal-ness.
You just don’t listen to my haste!
Instead your hard-earned time you’ll waste.
I warn you, it will now soon end…
It’s just around this sentences’ bend --
   So just 
        to mess
A falling sentence,  leaning right;
You’ve reached the end I hope you know,
There’s nothing more for me to show…
If you’re still here, there’s no more rhyme --
Cause this is now the final line.

Details | Blank verse | |

Love Song

Here’s what I’m thinking now 
at the end of the world: 

There are no atheists in foxholes— 
no theists in politics. 
If knowledge is power, 
and power corrupts, 
then why did I bother reading you, Cicero? 

Does it matter that I didn't’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

There’s a poetry reading tonight 
whence I’I'll chide other poets 
who don’t sit alone. 
I won’t bring up death 
but I might have to breathe, 
even into a mike 
and mouth lines to get a snap or a boo 
maybe even a wince or two. 

Just maybe I’I'll talk about love 
and how following your heart is like following a dog— 
it only leads to vittles and (female dogs). 
But how many times have I used that line 
since the story I wrote about you, 
a witty and sexy and fictional you? 
Most likely I’I'll read something tonight about you. 

I won’t recite it from memory 
because I don’t think about you that much anymore, 
not even when I search for my socks in your drawer 
or when I put on the scratchy sweaters you give me, 
horizontally striped to bring out my eyes? 

I don’t remember your eyes 
except they are blue. 
And I don’t remember you, 
not even when I smell cucumber and apple, 
not even when I sleep on my side of the bed 
or when you walk through the door 
happy to see me; 
even then I don’t remember you. 
Does it matter that I don’t love you? 
Would it have mattered if I did? 

How about a few one-liners 
for the end of days?— 

Depression is self-awareness, 
which you’d know if you were; 
I need Ritalin to listen to you, 
Lithium to hug you, 
Viagra to feel you, 
and Valium to sleep. 

All you need 
is me standing there, waiting at home 
with turns of phrase and word plays 
telling you about why I hate Ayn Rand 
but want to buy as much as I can 
and how I love celebrity gossip 
and detest poetry slams 
and find rhyming trite 
except when I am. 

Hypocrites can still be right, 
which you do understand 
because you nod at my nonsense 
about fighting the man. 

But now, at the end of all things— 
I’m speechless and witless and pointlessly well-read, 
and you’re just sitting there, smiling 
asking me to pass the bread.

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Seventh Day

God took his time to make the world and we are truly blessed, 
He worked so hard for six long days but then He took His rest. 
A whole day off from His creation so what’s a deity to do? 
He slept late then got Himself some premium coffee to brew. 
Then He made himself some cinnamon buns and ate them on the deck, 
He wondered how things were back on Earth but resisted the urge to check. 
They’ll be fine for just one day. How much trouble could they find? 
I left them alone in a paradise and now it’s My turn to unwind. 
Then He remembered the serpent and the tree of wrong and right, 
And He began to worry that they’d never make it to the morning light. 
So He put on a robe and grabbed His keys and headed for the door, 
Then He stopped himself before He left and He paced across the floor. 
If He couldn’t trust them for even one day then what good would they be? 
So He decided to make a mutton sandwich and go and watch TV. 
But He couldn’t concentrate on the game and He was running out of chips, 
And taking a little walk in the garden would be much better for His hips. 
He went to check up on the kids in Eden and what do you suppose?
Sure enough He found the two of them running around in clothes.
They pointed fingers at each other and at the snake and at the tree,
And all the while He thought to Himself, they really do need Me.
That’s why God keeps Himself available no matter what the time or day,
So when we are in need of his strength we only have to pray.
Who knows? Maybe someday we’ll realize what there is at stake,
We’ll be able to take care of ourselves and then God can take a break.
But not yet.

Details | Free verse | |

My Unhappy Lazyboy

After a long work day I come home to a long warm shower.  It was getting late into 
evening hours.  I sat down in my favorite black leather chair.  Not knowing I was in for a big 
scare.  I rolled a joint and sat back fully reclined.  I was getting high out of my mind.
       As I was enjoying my weed, I almost choked because a voice spoke beneath me!  I 
jumped up and listened to my chair spit profanity.  I wondered if I was loosing my sanity.  
My lazyboy said, "Don't be scared, sit down and talk to me!"
       I seriously thought I was dreaming.  Like an out-of-body experience waking up 
screaming.  No this is real, very real.  I just knew my chair was about to do a cartwheel!
       "No need looking around wearing a frown, you been sitting down on me for years; so 
have no fear.  No it's not the weed, you're seeing clearly, so sit down and listen to me."
       I sat down in utter shock, resting my buttocks.  As my chair began to explain.
       "No Jimmy you're not going insane, but I feel you're causing me harm.  I have burns, 
scratches, now dust all along my arms.  I'm left with a permanant frown.  I desperately need 
a rub down.  I don't wanna be mean, but get some disinfectant and clean.  The way I'm living 
is obscene!"
       No more explanations were needed.  So after a good wipe down it was obvious I had 
succeeded.  My lazyboy's black leather had a nice shine.  Now I wanted to rest my spine.
       "Ah I feel so much better.  Now I can go back into a deep sleep.  You can go back 
enjoying your weed or nicotine.  Just remember my hygiene, and from time to time give me 
a clean - Thank you."
       I could have sworn my lazyboy gave me a wink.  I shook my head, tomorrow I would 
go see a shrink!
For Matt Caliri contest "Spea Chair! Speak!

Details | Rhyme | |

Imagine All Over Toilet Paper

To all you varmints
Who like to squeeze the Charmin's
I went to the grocery store one day 
And someone had the Charmin's squeezing away
I said hey what are you doing that for
Like come on right in the store
She looked at me like i was spun
Like it was something i had ever done
So i gave a little squeeze to see how she liked it 
Another women saw me and started having a fit
Hey she said don't do that 
So your the culprit that makes the rolls flat 
Well i was stunned so i said real fast
No she did it first i did it last
I was just trying to teach her a lesson you see
Squeezing the Charmin's that was the first time for me
Well now i had done it i was caught in the act
And i don't squeeze the Charmin's and that's a fact
She twisted my words upside down
Made me look like a total clown
There i was in the middle of a war 
Right in the middle of the grocery store 
The moral to the story is don't squeeze the Charmin's
Their is a lot of people looking for those varmints

Details | Quatrain | |

4 in less than forty


Have to be somewhere in 40 mins
Enough time to write at least one
Fortunately I’m not using and pens
Else I would not be close to done

Of course you see the form I write
One familiar yet still complicated
It should be easy I write every night
Why my poems are often post dated

Halfway there only three minutes gone
Can I write eleven of these in my time
Maybe but could I post them all as well
Not sure, but I wouldn’t even bet a dime

The last I didn’t rhyme of first and third
I will admit I normally will rhyme abab
But in my amount of time that’s absurd
I am trying to finish quickly as you see


I already finished one how about another
The next line already in my head of course
Now you are probably saying o brother
This guy is a distinct body member of a horse

Really it’s just practice and having a bit of fun
I am definitely bored at this very early hour
I’m also texting a friend here and think of pun
I’d tell her what I think, but she might be sour

The last of course was purely a joke my friend
No evil thoughts currently in my head Miss PD
I at present, do not have that emotion to lend
Or maybe it was serious the last stanza hehehe

This is so much fun, a great way to pass time
You should try it, if you would possibly dare
I have said time a million times in my rhyme
Take time reading them, go ahead and stare

Details | Burlesque | |


I’m a man
In case you couldn’t see
I don’t use the word “poopie”
And I’m addicted to TV
I’m a man
Who doesn't have time to bleed
But who still has compassion
For blind, busty women in need
I’m a man
Who isn’t defined by “it”
Though affectionate enough
To scratch a public itch
I’m a man
Driven by real adventure
Falling asleep on the sofa
Still wearing my dentures
I’m a man
A wild stud in full bloom
Waiting in the Jacuzzi 
Picking my Fruit of the Loom
I’m a man
Who hates to be mean
Crying in the bathroom
When it’s time to clean
I’m a man
Nothing more or less
A mountain of masculinity
Who never ceases to impress

Details | Free verse | |

Georgia Muse

I went to Georgia without my bonjo in my hand I knew it would be great after I landed and took a stand I told them my name and they asked, "What's your fame?" I reached for my muse and turned it loose like a goose They straightened their ties and said “O’ me, O’ my!” “We made a mistake about this poetic rhyming guy!” Someone handed me a bonjo and they all joined the tango My muse had its way and we had a wonderful stay As we departed for home they started to sing, “Hurry back poet, may your muse give you wings!”

Details | I do not know? | |


Long ago, when I was young,
Before my hearing began to fail,
Why, I could hear a boll weevil
Tiptoe across a cotton bale.
But many years have come and gone;
The ghetto blaster took its toll.
Now I couldn't hear an elephant
Dance in clogs with wooden soles.

Details | I do not know? | |


Time--it moves like a scalded cat, 
And I--I creep like a snail.
Like a long tailed cat in a lawn mower's path,
I am nearing the end of my tale.

Now, it's said that you're only as old as you feel,
And aging, they say, doesn't hurt,
But, try to believe you're as young as you feel,
When you feel like you're older than dirt.

Details | Free verse | |

Head Chef

The special today,
is Tom's Stew,
more than enough,
for all of you.
Homemade bread,
with garlic, and chives,
real butter without calories,
dripping from the sides.
Strawberry Shortcake,
heaping with cream,
fresh from scratch,
right out of a dream.
Eat all you want,
get happy, and stuffed,
take some with you,
he insist you have enough.
Open all night,
his lights always on,
place your orders,
before it is all gone.

Details | I do not know? | |


Feeling sad?  
Well that's too bad,
But why mope around in a dark blue funk?  
Don’t let life’s trouble 
Burst your bubble.  
Why waste your time on all that junk? 
Now, life might have you in the pits, 
But it's not time to call it quits. 
Don't let those dark thoughts clutter up your mind.  
Come on now, let's meditate 
On things that cheer and elevate, 
And leave the morose, gloomy things behind. 
A great big laugh 
On your behalf
Might drive the gloomy mist away.
And a toothy grin 
Above your chin
Could brighten someone else’s day.                               
A chuckle might forestall
The family doctor’s call, 
And, maybe, even shoo away the nurse.
Some stuff and nonsense matter 
Could make the day go better,
And, I guarantee, it will not make it worse.   

Details | I do not know? | |


Get r done, you say in fun
Hurry up and birth my son
The time is near and coming soon
For Dallas to exit from your womb
Your second son will make your family whole
A new life for you is yet to unfold
Get r done you will surely say
When Crystal tells you it is now your day
To watch the boys while she goes out
Then you will be the one to pout
Of all the stress that children bring
The diapers and bottles and all those fun things
But I will tell you this without doubt
To get r done you have been devout
Your love for your children will forever grow
Will and Dallas has a wonderful home
One where laughter will fill their heads
Right up until time for bed
When dad is yelling Get R Done
And the little ones are ready for morning to come
Then mom will be the one to shout
I got r done, now go play and stay out!


Details | Rhyme | |


                                       All these words inside my head
                                           drive me crazy while in bed.
                                       They will dance inside my brain
                                         and fall down like pouring rain

                                             When I try to dress for work
                                          down the hallway they will lurk.
                                           When I leave and drive my car
                                          on every signpost there they are.

                                            What this soul now has to do
                                         is write down these words for you.
                                         Taking pen and pad in hand I'll
                                            write down what they demand.

                                          When it's over and all done and
                                          these words have had there fun.
                                            They will leave me then to rest
                                                        one day.........................
                                                       you know the rest,,,,,,,,,......

Details | I do not know? | |

Always Late

I'm in a constant race against Father time.
You can bet I'll be last crossing the finish line.

If I must tell someone a time and date,
I'll make it there, but I'll be late.

At home the clocks are running fast.
But when I arrive, I'm always last.

The harder I try, the later it gets.
Be it early sunrise or late at sunset.

My friends are always laughing, they think it's a joke.
I don't think it's very funny that I'm a chronic slowpoke.

If I start getting ready three hours prior.
I'll forget something, like putting my clothes in the dryer.

So, while you wait, there's no need to worry.
If I'm going to be late, I'll let you know early.

Details | Imagism | |

My Secret Love Affair

Even though our time is just
A moment here and there
To me you’ll never be 
The average everyday affair

I know I’m just a picture 
In the memory of your mind
The girl you keep a secret
The girl you leave behind

There was a time I’d lay awake 
And dream of you and I
There was a time I wanted more
There was a time I’d cry

For love is never easy
When it’s given just by one
Love is never easy 
When for him it’s just for fun

Love is never easy 
When you think that it’s for real
But when the spell is broken
It's not love, but lust you feel

Your dreams diminish one by one
Illusions fade away
And in their place reality
Has come to have its say

So now I know the secret 
To a passionate affair
To just enjoy the moment
To live without a care

To take each moment as it comes 
With eyes now open wide
But always with your secret love
You just enjoy the ride...

Details | Verse | |

Ding Dong The Wicked Witch is Dead

Globally, miners jubilantly jump for joy
Smiles on the faces of every girl and boy
The grins of a newly opened Xmas toy
Thatcher’s dead.

Trade unionists bounce along the street
Music blaring and the tapping of feet
From nurses to Bobbies still on the beat
Thatcher’s dead.

Street parties announced in the nation
Satan who brought economic inflation
Is deceased, now’s the time for elation
Thatcher’s dead.

Its times like this I’m sad I’m an atheist
And can only shout and wave my fist
And then go to the pub and get pissed
Thatcher’s dead.

Details | Free verse | |

Bladder Problems in Class

Numbers on 
White board…names written hori-

Students ask
To go pee…right when class starts – 
THAT’S just wrong…

Bathroom line
Of students who have bladder
Problems – WOW!

People are
Not using lunchtime to do 
Their business 

No one knows
When to do their duties – SER-

Details | Dramatic monologue | |

To Hurt To Say,But I'm Sorry

To Hurt to say,But I'm sorry.

Do you know how much it hurt.To see you disappear from a memories I have yet recalled.Your heart so ice cold there's nothing I can do for it.
Let me touch your chest and feel the breeze that escapes from if.
Did you know that with ever king there are rebels who dares chain him down.
Everyone person can life is determined by they way the express themselves.
And anyone can forge a fake life to get away and hide from their reality.
I'm going to be you reality has my hand reaches your face let me show you what it means to be hit by reality and take it seriously.Hopeless,Agony,Fear,Terrified, Corrupted.
I haven't had enough of your ego,of your smile,the lies that surround you.
Ha! let me see you fall and crawl don't beg it unsightly but crawl for you are the man the  shadow man.
Cling to me as i show you the grief and fear and anger I have of losing you,the only thing connecting me to you is the blood I waste on the ground in the night time wake.
Watch it fall as I cut deeper.How many times did I cry for you and you never even cared enough to answer me? 
Your faceless,heartless,cold eyes let me thank you.
Your turning my to stone your helping me write these disgusting feeling down every night.
You gave me something so powerful not even you could destroy them now these hands of course.
As I drink this  to ease my pain and free my self of this relapsing phase.Let me be happy let me be sad let me mad let me become depressed for I'm so bipolar it hurts.
How dare you trampled my pride and toss me around like a lifeless doll...Was I really your luggage you tried to throw away?
Be honest lies don't work no more for I've see everything everyone as danger has liar beggar and theive coming after me.Thank you for being my venom.
I'm sorry if I hurt you I never meant to.
Would you forgive me if I laid down to rest and not wake up again?
Please tell me.I can't help but feel like something useless in this wild game of tag and empty felt.It hurts you should know,So don't take to much time and tell me how you feel.
At least then I can dance with you.

Details | Narrative | |

Grandparents Before - But not today

Grandmothers and grandfathers how they look,
how can we see that there is a grandmother or a grandfather
When I was a little girl we could see a grandmother and a grandfather
Grandparents used hats, glasses, and walking stick
The skin of their face was weathered and wrinkled
Some had teeth they put in a glass in the evening

Grandmothers always had time for a glass of juice and a hug
She was never impatient, tie shoelaces with pleasure
Always in floral dresses, which smelled like grandma
Grandmothers wont not be at work tomorrow, she has time for an adventure
She does not skip a single word, to be finished soon
It was always sweets in grandmother's hand bag
She never spared, but shared with a beautiful smile

Grandfathers were a bit more restrained,
 bit concerned about the day's news in their newspaper
He would like to go for a walk, and he walks with small cautious steps
When he meet someone he knows, he lifts a bit on his hat and nod
He has very little hair on his head, and his head shines in the sun
Grandfathers have a strong hand to hold, I was confident in his hand
He could tell me what all the birds called, he was so wise

Everyone should experience an old-fashioned grandmother and grandfather
one that does not have a television, computer or washing machine
A grandmother and grandfather who always have good time

But it was in the past ..... not today...

A-L  Andresen :)

Details | Limerick | |

A Farmer Named Brock

There once was a farmer named Brock
Who was proud of his timely cock.
‘Cept it rose too early
Surprising his Shirley
On the day we turned back the clock.

Details | ABC | |

My Father's cleats

 It’s funny how my father’s hobby became mine. He has been a sportsman all his life, he played basketball, volleyball and softball all his youth, but his real passion is soccer and even though he is 55 years old now, he still keeps playing it and loving it. He has had all kinds of cleats, all brands, all colors, different styles, but it does not change anything, he still plays amazing. But one thing I do find hilarious is that every time he comes from a game, he cleans his cleats, he washes them and takes them with such an unbelievable affection, that I’m beginning to think that he might love them more than he loves me, but now I do know the feeling of a new shiny, hard and beautiful pair of cleats. I still recall when he took me for my very first pair, I could not believe he was doing it for me, I was so excited, but now I realize that what I was excited about is that I could be like my father for just a moment when I had them on. Ever since I was little, I remember my daddy playing soccer, leaving home all dressed up, ready to fight, and win the ball to make a remarkable roll on the field. The playing field that we both love, the field all covered in grass, all green, so delicious and soft, so colorful… being crashed by everyone’s cleats and the rolling ball, feeling the sunlight on our skin, and the wind on our faces. Having a team, an extra family with whom we could find support and create new ideas, new plays so we could smash the opponent. So yes, I loved watching him play and cheering him up more than I could ever like watching official and famous soccer teams. I do find funny the fact that my father’s hobby became mine since everyone says we’re too similar, and even though he also has a son, his daughter is with whom he shares that connection. I love the fact that our simple relationship was started thanks to such a manly sport, and curiously, to transform me into such a girly girl.

Details | Sonnet | |

Pillow Talk Abuse - Andrea Dietrich

PILLOW TALK ABUSE     (collaboration)

by~ Andrea Dietrich

Again you’re droning on and on and on. 
Yada, yada, yada, yada, yada. 
My time for beauty sleep will soon be gone. 
Why can’t you close your eyes? 
You know you oughta. 
Just press those lips together tight and zip! 
My lids are getting heavy as you talk. 
So now I offer you this little tip. 
Why don’t you go outside and take a walk? 
The clear night air might open up your mind.
Before you kill the bush you’re beating round. 
You’re killing ME; I hate to be unkind, 
But when I start to doze, I hear that sound . . . 
Yakety, yakety, yakety, yakety, yak. . . 
Please shut your trap. 
We’ve long since hit the sack!

by~ Poet Destroyer

Congratulations for thinking your work is done.
You may be tired  but you’re not the only one.
I sure hope you like spending your time all alone
All the young ones are grown and away from home.
So, I have no choice to yap yap yap' when you're around.
But, I do this to annoy, before my other annoying snoring sound.
Ever since I remember the beauty line is to late.
Don't forget my yapping mouth is what brings dinner to your plate?
But think of the funny way you want me to zip my lips tight.
My yakety yak is what gets me going through the night.
Retire your eyes else where, if you can't hear me out!
Wouldn't you rather me beat the bush, than to hear me shout.
Your ungrateful ways are like a sleeping pill.
Talking to you is like talking to a wall~ " oh! What a thrill!"
Maybe if you say a word or two, your mouth would put me to sleep
So my dear, talking to you is better than counting sheep.

A collaboration with * ANDREA DIETRICH

My collaboration contest

Details | Free verse | |

My Boredom Disease

Like sick allergies, 
Boredom can be passed around

Like a horrid storm,
Boredom can catch you off guard
Hold on for DEAR LIFE!

Like the whooping cough,
Boredom can be serious
If I were you, I’d
Get a vaccination ! 

Details | Verse | |


                                                     First time ....
                                               Back in the pocket
                                                The second time ....
                                                    Up in the bag
                                                     Third time ....
                                             Starting to feel the heat
                                                   Fourth time ....
                                               Down in the handbag
                                                    The fifth time ....
                                                     I'm a little tired
                                                       Sixth time ....
                                             Once again into the pocket
                                                      Seventh time .....
                                                  I soon start to glow
                                                       Eigth time ....
                                            Once again into the handbag
                                                        Ninth time ....
                                                   Now I'm really hot
                                                  Tenth time .... (Phu...)
                                                    Now I am: EMPTY !
                                         There are busy times for "plastic card"

A-L  Andresen :)

Details | Free verse | |

Ridiculous Me

Watch this scene with both eyes and try not to blink C: --> 

I stood there... silently
Like a predator near prey 
I sneak behind YOU

You weren't even aware of it!! Ha-ha! 

I made YOU jump hIgH
Like a startled hare
I chuckle and smile

You know that mischievous smile of mine? 

Your reaction was
PRICELESS - you were so upset
But YOU forgave me

Well...I'm flattered. . . 

We laugh'd together (just like the good times)
In a chorus - our volume
Picked up extreme sound

Believe me - I could hear our laughter from a mile away!

But I'm glad I did
My best to make you giggle

Ridiculous me... 
Wouldn't you agree?

Details | Couplet | |

A Pony From Mars


It came from the sky, a gray silver stallion.
I looked up high, and I also had seen a dragon.

With so many things in this universe.
I'm on 24/7 alert with a camera in my purse. 

Who would have known I'd be the first to spot a PEGASUS.
The town folks wave hi every time I walk my hippopotamus.

I enjoy showing everyone pictures of a flying horse.
I don't understand why they call a DOCTOR every time I call the TASK FORCE.

I think they are jealous over all the things I've seen.
Ever since I sighted a LEPRECHAUN when I turned fourteen.

No one ever believed me when I saw an army of dragonflies.
They had a name for me "the who See's too much in the skies!"

I don't know why they can't see what I see.
For all I know they don't even believe me.

If you don't believe me then explain how I got this magic MEDALLION.
It was a gift from the silver stallion.

I also have many pictures of a  UNICORN.
Who gave me a piece of its magic horn.

We sat together while UNI" drank from the lake.
We enjoyed talking, --talking about how U.F.O.'s are fake.

Why can't they see?  I fell off a boat and got rescued by a MERMAID!
Who would have known a mermaid swim around with first-aid.

I also remember the day I followed a LEPRECHAUNS.
We were playing under the rainbow having fun.

When I told my doctor about all the things I've seen.
He locked me in a DUNGEON, thinking I was an ALIEN QUEEN.

I begged and I told him I don't believe in any type of alien.
Too bad the master of this dungeon came from another region.

In a way he looks like that one SILVER STALLION from Mars.
The first sighting I'd seen the day I fell from the monkey bars.

I have this picture of this horse of course.
JUST help me out of this white-jacket!!! ;-)
If you want to see the coolest picture of a flying horse. 

Mother & Son

Details | Free verse | |


I will start with using my hand as a guide
And in the end I will open my eyes that I will decide

I consider to do this with one thing in mind
I will close my eyes and will imagine it blind
With no colors or fractionation of the light
Just plain me and a vision with my hand as my sight

My hair is very coarse and some what fine
What I just described is so benign  
I twirl my hair and make it bend 
And I will say its very clean not oily on the ends

As I press on my forehead I simply feel a distinct part
I notice from hair to skin it is very different from the start
The simple partings from hair not like skin
I am going to feel with my other hand and begin

The smoothness of my skin like years of water eroding a rough rock surface smooth
Not just that my skin is like home to years of stories like scars and attitude
And when I raise my eyebrows the wrinkles it makes is more so for expression
I did not notice it with certain ideas, thoughts, and emotions

I run my hands down to my eyelids I feel movement of my eyes trying to peek
Eyelids that I have, vibrates with some kind of fear, Why?, that I will seek
Just now as I thought about it a sensation ran through my brain
My eyes is the world to me and that is true and not insane

Myself portrait of me is through my touch for now
But to finish it I will have to open my eyes soon and how
I been in a trance full of so many ideas just with my eyes closed
I run my hand on my nose and lips and I smile who could apposed

The feelings in the tip of my fingers rub on my chin and jaw with care
I do notice roughness of unshaved velcro gripping hair 
I skip my ears so I will sneak a feel with my fingers I chose
I notice it is like my nose with cartilage, so I don't suppose

I will now open my eyes that I will use a mirror to see myself
My head is oval shape and my neck is like a stump, please help
My skin is very tan and my eyes are brown with my eyes I see
With all the description with my hands, one sure thing is the same and key

It is the description of measurements that is what my hands and eyes can see me
With a smile I am looking into the mirror and I can describe that I am happy
Myself portrait of me is such a way to get to know myself once more
I will never think it was a waste of time or a bore

Details | Bio | |

Solitude: To Yoda, An Ode

Green bark a prism creates,
Feel the pull of earth, you must.

Rotates, a slime of endless hates,
Can hold me not, this world’s crust.

Friendship’s ties, isolation Deflates,
Succumbs, my spaceship, to bitter rust.

Mist, my soul forever permeates,
Lift-off, booms the rocket’s thrust.

My spirit when light returns, elates,
Swamps swell, swallowed hope’s swirling dust.

Trapped, I am, until student from fate
Arrives to learn; Cloud City or bust.

Details | Rhyme | |

4:20, Four- Twenty, The Earth Day Birthday

Contractual agreements with publisher caused DELETION

Details | Free verse | |

The Egg Eaters Hallow


Details | Rhyme | |

Tick -Tick -Tick --Oops

Oh for the time to find time,
And understand it’s demand on me if I can,
Let it be understood that if I could I would,
But the subject is much pursued and misconstrued.

You see before I wrote I began to dote on time this time.
And knew that when I would finally view.. my words,
It would be the future it would…or should..
That was in the past and as you see it did not last,

So in the past the future was yet to be here, I fear,
That past crashed which is evident in the words I've spent.
As I write, this thought arises that I fight,
That this present line in time will pass and quite fast.

That past is behind and the present will be in kind ,
And it too just passed but pay that no mind,
Because this last line passed that was once the future and did not last,
And soon this poem’s written future will end.. Ain’t that a gas? - Oops, it passed !

Details | Limerick | |

Tax Time Again

Once again it's that time of year.
The time that we've all come to fear.
   They take every dime,
   It's tax season time
And poverty's getting so  near.

All year I try to scrimp and save
And with spending habits to behave.
   They snatch my savings
    Despite my ravings.
Depression makes my spirits cave.

No matter how much you have paid
Your hope for a refund will fade
   When forms are revised.
   You'd best be advised
They really want ALL that you've made.

for Carolyn's "taxing time" contest
Francine Roberts  29/01/2011

Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Details | Couplet | |


There once was a time when you can say unbuttoning was part of the foreplay. Every single button was a step to reach to a place they call garden of peach. Unbuttoning each other was like an art in a game which still now has few expert. Now a days people do not have much time and they quickly want to reach their prime. With zippers there is a vast change in scene I think you are getting what I mean. In this game people have less time to play zippers help them in that without much delay. ===============000=============== Placement;5th, February 2013 Contest:Buttons Sponsor:Susan Burch

Details | Narrative | |

The little pen that tried to get drunk

That goofball husband of hers brought her to this joint to see her get drunk for the very first time. She actually plugged her nose trying to sip her first glass of beer. Good grief. 20 minutes and she barely finished it. She walked to the restroom and I felt her teetering just a little bit. She likes the feeling though, I can tell! I sure liked it when she started boogying to the beat of the band on her way back to the table. Too bad Mr. dingbat won’t ever dance with her. She keeps tapping her hands on the table to the rhythm of the music. That’s why I have to write so slow. . . . 
      Now  she’s   tryin ta   drink  another   beer  but   she   can   hardly stand it  an  her husband  sez come on don’t ya wanna know  how   it   fills   ta be drunk? She says   well at list I fill buzzd now. . . 

The nice buzz wore off. It’s at least an hour later. She and hubbie got this idea to go to the liquor store. First time she ever went to one. She thought maybe brandy would taste better so then she could drink something stronger and know how it felt to be drunk. Brandy sounded sweet and fruity to her. Boy was she wrong. She took a little taste and it burned going down. That stuff sucks just like the beer. . . . 

Wow she jus finisht tha hole boddle rily fast lik mebbie ten minuts ago so she kud fil drunk an she put me down ta finnish tha boddle in one shot    now she kant evin    kip her   eyez    opun    UH  ohhhhhhh

Epilogue:  The preceding narration was based on actual fact. Upon consuming an entire bottle of brandy in less than ten minutes, "she" immediately passed out, and I recall she awoke in the morning having forgotten everything that transpired once she fell asleep. Furthermore, when she went into the bathroom the next morning and saw some flecks of vomit on the walls, she was quite amazed. Why? Because she had no recollection of throwing up, and she realized her goofball husband had actually attempted to clean up a mess in their house for the first time in their young married life!!! 

By the way, Jenny, if you happen to be reading this, Shhhh. Please do not tell her other sisters. It would surely get back to you guys’ mother, and your poor upstanding church-loving mom might have a heart attack to hear of her daughter’s one transgression with the devil’s brew! Sincerely, Her Sober (albeit sometimes fanciful) Pen

Details | Free verse | |

Conspiracy: Who Killed The Easter Bunny

A crowded table, all suspended in shock 
The sound of the shot dimming to a ‘knock’
Only silence, except for the marching clock
The weapon still smoking; an anonymous glock

Loud cries arise from the elongated table,
Jack Frost is shocked, the Tooth Fairy unable
To speak whilst Santa is checking the stable
For clues on the erstwhile maidservant Mable

They searched for hours, called in C.S.I,
Panic set in, would the children all cry?
Sandman confirmed the bunny had died
Batman suspected somebody had lied

Guests were quizzed, interrogations began
The mystery unfolded when Santa Claus ran,
Grabbing the pies, he tried escaping in a van
But was stopped in his tracks by superman

Details | Rhyme | |

For the sake of sanity

I've had it up to here
life is so off track
hand me the remote
let's rewind it back

17 years old
I thought my life was hard
Well now I see the difference
'Cause now I am in charge

Companies are screaming
They get right my ear
"Miranda, pay your bills"
Clean your credit dear

Walk in the door
And I fall flat on my face
Toy's from crack to crevice
Completely out of place

Clean up this lovely mess
Get the kiddies off to bed
I try relaxing in the bath
To hear cries of "mama" in my head.

-Miranda Lambert-
for March Madness contest.

Details | Monorhyme | |

Having Things Due is Doo Doo

Payments on my credit card and rent are always due. Power, water, gas, and those horrendous phone bills too. Borrowed books I’ve not yet read soon are coming due. Maybe I can find some time to read them in the loo. Also it’s that time of year when all of us are due for a visit to a store with cheap shots for the flu! My mammograms and dental visits are LONG overdue. I cannot afford them yet. What’s a girl to do? And Mr. Doctor, why must I wait so long just for you? I think some respect for me, your patient, sure is due! Thinking of the money from my savings I withdrew just to make it through this year has really made me blue. Gee, if I could have one wish and have that wish come true, I would wish to live my life as one big well-to-do! But there’s one thing that’s NOT due for which I need not stew. Thank goodness that I’m too old now to have a baby due!
For Paula Swanson's How Due You Dew Poetry Contest

Details | Light Poetry | |


I love to watch the bulging balloons go floating by on Thanksgiving Day, Filled with gas and bloated it’s hard to guess how much they must weigh. It’s a tradition at our house to watch them parade as they go bounding by, Look at that one wobble as he makes his way for a piece of pumpkin pie. But all too soon the consumption parade comes to a crashing end, As to the couches to watch the game the balloons will sleepily descend. And into the clear blue November sky each of them dreamily soars, The heights to which they rise are measured by the timber of their snores. And when they awake an invisible rope guides them as if by fate, To the microwave to heat up a second helping before it gets too late. This time of year the only way they know that it’s time to stop, Is when they hear an unnerving sound as one of them goes pop.

Details | Rhyme | |

My Lemon Stella

She was called, Stella, my little yella lemon! 
A Chevy Citation,you can only imagine my elation!

 She started almost ever time I needed her too.

 As long as the wires were crossed the fire flew!

 No horn and a rattle in the end.

 The hood was buckled with a slight bend.

 You had to turn the car off, to turn her wipers on. 

 The bumper was duck taped and her muffler was wired on, its true!

 It even quit more than a time or two!

 She was a stick shift and got rubber in one gear, which made her hard to steer!

 Drivin’ down the road she would sway to the radio’s greatest hits

 Getting her grove on until a pot hole punched her dance ticket 

 and there we sit! Not to worry I cleaned her battery cable and post 

 once I got her to coast, the motor finally hit, her rods a 

 knockin’, and  we were back on the road listening to our radio and a rockin’!

For contest: Driven Me Crazy

Details | Limerick | |


The holidays are a time when we hold loved ones close

making New Year's resolutions to be better and not so morose.

With trimming the tree,  the gifts, the cards, the good wishes for all

Spending too much time and money at the mall.

Our hangover on Jan 2nd makes our resolutions go out the windows.

Details | Haiku | |


Lookin' after pests
Keepin' a CLOSE eye on 'em
"Those wild animals!"

Roamin' around zoo
Searchin' for sneaky monkey
Hidin' in a tree

Zookeeper gets mad
"Where's Marty, the smartypants!?"
"He TOOK my cage keys!"

Details | I do not know? | |

Schooldays Western and Graduation Classics

Brought up from the womb of schooldays
Where memories still frames those mischief plays
Stuck with the thoughts of dreaming holly bolly babes
Comparing the beauties from among the best
The out and out gist, one surely misses those garlopholic days.

The morning alarm runs the cold water hot
Breakfast served and then the sprint
To reach before the nine forty bell.
Literature lecture the morning Yawn, followed by
Critical calculations the creation of few jobless mankinds.
Easy to know the solar system only from books, but
One need to fight against hurdles, to go round the globe.
The fruit that proved the gravitation, and the man who saw,
Keeping rest of the things constant, how come he didn’t notice before
Other things to fall ??
Subjects all seemed to me having an inter-relationship
And lastly this chain is known as history with mystery.

Immature mind yet a manly look
Smoking fag with creative thoughts
No idea how large the peg
Yet felt proud to say, ‘I finished 750 ml alone without a vomit break’.
A hint to know the word ‘C’,
And then I thought of kindergarten days
Where I learnt, C is for Cat,
Was it a fake?

Crazy things and Quarter to quarter girlfriends
Tears shifted to the word sex.
Yummy dreams with sorts of vulgarity
Wings started to spread but keeping in mind the fidelity.

Bohemian time and three more irresponsible years
Had to reach anyhow before the rays reaches
Principal’s eyes.
British age classrooms and railway station fans
High degree oldie professors and their sleeping pills lectures
Boredom same gender batch mates and that regular back gate
The awaited smudged horizon, suddenly brightens
The first one to appear used to have hundreds of eyes and mind respect.

A rare macaw time now
Bunch of responsible days to come
Stressed with few kicked off past and framed memories
Westerns and classics are now changing to a routine life.
Weekend alcoholic night and a morning sleepy Sunday
Followed by a workaholic Monday to Friday.

Details | Limerick | |

From the Underside (Chair Speak Limericks)

Why is it you never show me your face?
My feelings are hurt, so you I’ll replace!
     Find another on which to pounce
     Each time your team takes a bad bounce
The damage you’ve done cannot be erased

Even my fine leather is marred with grooves
From all your fanatic football fan moves
     Get off your duff, I must rebuff
     You’ve made my lining far too rough
Each time you move, I hope the team will lose

I have already called a moving van
To transport me to a gentler land
     Where people of grace sip green tea
     Pontificating times that be
By dawn in my place you’ll find the trash can

Details | ABC | |

odd coffee date

All was going well until she asked for a drink
Then my stomach started to sink
She ask “do you have coffee?”
“no it’s OCD”

Stood up, turned 80 degrees
Counted my steps, ones and threes
Get the scales and measure the grains
In nerves, must not make any stains

Add the milk, not too much
Now the sugar, just a light touch
Click the kettle, watch my watch
If she was Irish, I could always add scotch

Click! Pour the water
63 mm size always matters
A quick stir, a wee bit slower
Too high make it lower

Turn clockwise, go for the door
Marching like in the marine corps
There she is lying in a heap
I was  hours, she’s fast asleep

Details | Free verse | |

I am behind the wheel

I am behind the wheel
things move quickly by
I feel like I ‘m being pulled along 
by the machine
new  gauges 
just keep coming 
and going around

the faster I go
the greater the outside winds
the greater the noise
garbage flies speedily by
in all directions
some of it hits me 
and sticks

the outside noises are great
they confuse me
they cloud the music
and the surroundings
and overcome 
and relations

I must 
keep the windows closed
to keep out the outside noise
I must try to take control 
of the machine 
slow down speed up
right turn left turn
never never stop

I am told 
that I must keep going
to succeed
hands on the wheel
foot on the throttle
never never look back

I ‘m afraid 
to stop
how will I get 
where I’m going
once I no where
how will I find it
how will I know

Details | Rhyme | |

My Life

My life has been varied and long at many things I failed. Aged seven I wanted to be a train driver but that idea was soon derailed. I trained to be an Olympic athlete came last in every race I studied to be a lawyer and lost my every single case I left my job as a crane driver on the day I was hired My stint as a Gigolo left a lot to be desired. I applied to be a hotel porter but was told there was no room and my time as a concert pianist was distinctly out of tune. So I became a writer and dream my time away I can be who or where I want whilst staying in bed all day.
Ken Duddle

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Indonesian Drum

My wife found an Indonesian drum that she couldn’t live without,
It was a ceremonial one used to play for all who remain devout.

It had brightly colored beads and paint to decorate its side,
And it grabbed her by the imagination and would not be denied.

“Are you sure that we can do this, are you sure that it won’t unravel?
This thing isn’t exactly portable and it isn’t built for extensive travel.”

“We’ll make it work,” is all she said and then she handed it to me,
It was clear that from that moment on it was my responsibility.

This drum and I traveled together throughout the great Northwest,
And the both of us stayed together wherever I became a guest.

I carried it through the airport one day and then back again the next,
This is exactly why air travel always leaves me feeling so perplexed.

I transported it through the concourse then down to baggage claim,
Making sure to keep the crowds at bay, drum safety was my aim.

Carefully I loaded the Indonesian drum into the backseat of my truck,
Only one more hour on the road and then we’d be home with any luck.

When we pulled into our drive it was the first thing that I took inside,
Bringing it from Washington State and then delivering it with pride.

I set it on the kitchen counter then I went out for the rest of our bags,
Our Bloodhound was so happy to see us both and to sniff at all the tags.

The time change had effected us so we thought that before we took a seat,
We had better go out and find ourselves something good to eat.

So we patted the dog on his head and said that we’d be right back,
But as soon as we’d left again he decided it was time for a little snack.

We thought that Chinese sounded good so we went and got us some,
But Sherlock was left at home alone with a taste for Indonesian drum.

When we got back home the drum lay there with one side chewed away,
And the expression on Sherlock’s face said that he was ready to play.

So now we have an Indonesian drum with one side turned out of sight,
It has the teeth marks turned to the wall so you can’t see the Sherlock bite.

If you should ask my wife about her drum I can grantee a fluster,
I can also tell you that for at least one day Sherlock lost his luster.

But what is the meaning of a souvenir, is it only for decoration?
Or is meant for something else? Is it more of a declaration?

Because if it is meant to bring out conversation and try to evoke a story,
Then this is exactly what our drum does now that it’s in our inventory.

Details | Rhyme | |

New Years Resolutions

Well, it's again that time to make a fresh start,
Concoctin' another lot of resolutions to impart.
I'll try to come up with some that are easy to surmount,
And perhaps this year actually carry them out!

Toppin' my list I resolve to buy a new scales.
When I mount the one I own, it never fails.
Tellin' me that I weigh more than I think I should.
My understandin' of this dilemma is not at all understood!

To lessen calories, fats and such I'll curtail my food intake,
Therefore, I'll consume no hamburgers, pizzas or chocolate cake.
I'm sure this restriction won't apply to eatin' gobs of ice cream,
But if it does, somehow, I'll have to create a devious scheme!

To please my spouse and appear more reputable,
And I suppose it might be more socially acceptable,
For church I'll deign to wear a stiflyin' tie and coat,
Sufferin' through interminable sermons clutchin' at my throat!

Even with the best of intentions to keep these pledges should I fail,
And in my lackadaisical attempts they should come to no avail,
The Lord willin' I'll be around come this time next New Year,
To contrive new resolutions to which I pledge to adhere!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Placed No. 4 in Carolyn Devonshire's "New Years Resolutions" Contest - Dec 2010

Details | Lyric | |

It's My Birthday, It is Your Birthday

It’s My Birthday

It’s my birthday…  I look out the window there is no one for me owe so, owe so lonely poor me . 

It’s my  birthday…  you surprise me, with a Barber-Q grill  with a cooler that chills with a grin we show white grills.

Happy Birthday… it’s my Birthday I am still waiting,  it   is almost the end of my the day, just waiting on you to wish me a happy birthday which, well make my day. 

It’s my birthday…you do not remember that day, can we go out for we can remember that day?

It’s my birthday… I can share it or alone, some share it with a twin, or with a friend and the ones who stay to the ends like a good friend.

It my birthday…  its looks like another day to me I just need someone or something to comfort with me a room full of women and with hand full men, a juice in cup, juice in glass, with a sweet lady and grill on cut grass that may make every day feel like my birthday, with a touch of class. 
It’s your birthday… it’s your birthday you should all-ways win on your birthday, if do not have a mate you sneak and go on second party date form those who may player hate.  
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday!  it comes and go, I see you come through, looking out my window with a hand full company that is what a party really should need, yes it’s sweet, sweet with music and sweet with treats or  it must be the money, or food, or brinks, or just me.

Poetry 7/7/12 by author Keith Kadell

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Postman Cometh

My prankster, older son, came home from college, just the other day.
He saw such great possibilities, in how, he, with the Trolls, could play.
Now, you must remember, my son, has always been, a tad bit wild.
But, he truly is a charmer, when he has a new brainchild, compiled.

The Postman had been so Leary of dropping off mail, with the Trolls about.
So daily, I would greet him, explaining, they were really harmless, big old louts.
And I complained a little, of the time spent, to convince him, back at the house.
So my son took up the cause, yes, he was actually going to try to help me out.

Each day, he got the mail, I was so proud that he was trying to solve my plight.
He said he had an idea, which he would try, the last day in town, to set it right.
Of course, I believed him, he was my son, and I felt such pride, as he drove away.
Then I waited for the surprise, he’d set with the Trolls, to make everything OK.

The postman made his rounds, as usual, until he came toward our house. 
Then he shot off like a rocket, which was truly outward bound… the louse.
So I ran out to catch him, for in his hurry, he’d forgotten to drop off my mail…
But he was so fast that I missed him… so back to the house I did sail…

In front of the garage… sat 3 Trolls in bib overalls in their rocking chairs.
Across their laps lay shotguns, yes, the really heavily gauged ones…
And there before my eyes were crickets playing banjos all around…
With ‘Deliverance’, the song they’d used, to make that mailman bound…
But don’t worry; I got even with my prankster son… To end this tale…
The next time he ask for money… I said… the check is… in the mail.

1st place in the Contest: Smile Your on Candid Camera

Details | I do not know? | |

Why Are Church Doors Locked


I have been a member for many years. I attend when ever I can.  I pray and pay.
I guess, I took it for granted, but not anymore. I must stand up for all that want to know.  For all that need to know. No! I am not a  hero, but I would like to know. 

There was a time in my youth, when it was un-thinkable to lock a church door. Did congress pass a law, while I was sleeping?  Should I call the sheriff?  Why didn’t the pastor tell me?  Does he know? Did he lock the front door, side door, and even the back door? Does God know, the doors at the church are locked?  Saints, we are in big trouble.

Okay! Let’s get serious. Are you trying to keep something locked out? Are you trying to keep something locked in? This could be a sin. There are two individuals in the congregation that I can ask.  They certainly must know answer. After all, their name is Brother Lock and Brother Smith. Yes! The Lock Smith Brothers. 

Now if the Devil is locked up, when I leave church, I’m okay with that. You say, I should not worry about this.  Well! It is now at the top my list. I want to know more. It’s time to stop church crime.  

Dr. "G"

Details | Enclosed Rhyme | |

Not Your Rag Doll Any More


Baby, your time is running out…
  No - I won't play in your house anymore
My life as your ragdoll - is coming to an end
  Your kind of vapid love left me so forlorn 

My heart was torn and frayed 
  By being tossed around by you
I was but a puppet - in your cruel selfish hands
  Played with- then tossed  aside
Like some old, gnarly shoe 

I was once new and shiny
  But you used me - then threw me to the ground
I had bright red curls, with lips painted cherry red
  And a happy beautiful smile
But the way you treated me
  Was like some game of 'lost and found' 

My insides had turned to cotton
  Spilling from me - like tidal pools of tears
My smile was painted on
  My threads bare and worn
No longer could I feel -I lost so much of me
So many lost and wasted years 

Once I didn’t have a backbone
  It was made of useless twine
Easily dragged around by you
  But now I see you for what you are...
A cold heart that has no shine 

Next time you think of coming my way
  Forget it...Just turn right back around
Cuz' you’re not coming in
  My heart won’t be your rag doll any more
You've lost me...but this last joke's on you
  Baby...I'm the one who wins
I'll survive - I don't need a love like yours

Yes, many tears I used to cry
  But -I don't want you back anymore
Just keep walkin' on down that road
  Now I hold my head up high  
My heart has been tranposed
  So- don't come knocking at my door...
To you baby - my door's forever closed


Details | Sonnet | |

Twin Key

June 24th 2010

Twin Key

Hey, help me out here would you please?
Can you show me where all my whys go?
While you are at it search my I told you so.
More so, that alter ego I want you to seize.

Listen here and listen up, it has twin keys.
I tell you something else, do not tell it no.
It gets bigger and bigger a dynasty I know.
Blow a kiss for me send it my best breeze.

Roll out my red carpet,
Spit-shine your shoes,
Sit it down just park it!
Say I depart my blues!

Look out here there is two just like me,
God blessed you! I have my Twin Key.

®Registered: Ann Rich 2010

Details | Rhyme | |

Barracuda Alma

Alma was a Barracuda, married two times four,
she knew the game, she played so well and never failed to score.

So, when the chance came about to scam a naive Sailor,
she knew she had to do her best to take the drunken whaler.

He told her she would make a fortune taking care of him,
for when he died, there was a prize, though all that seemed so grim.

Alma did not blink an eye or even hesitate,
she took the deal and lead him home to wait, and wait, and wait.
For years he kept on living, amazing her each day.
He must have been one hundred on the eve he passed away.

She shuffled with his papers, searched long throughout  the night.
At last, she found "The treasure" to her unashamed delight.
For there upon the table, an envelope did lay.
The seal was stamped, it looked official, she was finally on her way !

She opened it to see her name, her time had come around.
Alas, She was not mentioned on the paper she had found.
For years she'd taken care of him without a word of scorn.
But in the paper came a photo of a tiny, pink, newborn.

To her dismay, she turned it over, this is what she saw,
shocked, she read the note outloud in disbelief and awe.

"To Timmy. my dear and only son, I find myself ashamed,
that never have I seen you, nor given you my name."

"To you, I leave what all I have, you'll find it all recorded,
to only you, no exception, it will be awarded.
It's at the lawyers' office, not far down the street."
"Forgive me son, my sad regret, we will never meet.

P.S. Avoid Ole' Barracuda Alma, all smiles, a greedy type,
She'll snatch the gold out of your teeth, if she thinks the pickin's ripe.

 Alma ranted, then she raved,
she cursed him in his cold, dark grave.

He fooled her once and  cheated her right to the very end.
"Oh well", she finally whispered, 
"There's ALWAYS time for me to  find a very new, best friend !

Details | Carpe Diem | |


Your  love pricks me like a rose each thorn grows but no one knows Your so full of 
it as it shows so carry on now go on, go. I'm fed up with the phony and  i'm 
through with the tears, you couldn't pay me all your money to make up for those 
years. Someone help me I feel faint how could I think he was such a saint and 
worst of all I let me fall into a spiral down below. A magic called love carried 
by the dove of someone I use to know.

Details | Free verse | |


Love me tonight girl we won't meet again ,
Don't fight the feeling cause love ain't a sin,
Let your body decide what it does,
It's okay baby, ha ha ha ha,
Let your body decide what it does ,
It's okay baby cause everybody ****s,
I know it's straight to the point,
But I'd rather be straight up and straight forward,
Instead of playing with your heart and your mind,
Games are waste of time, now we can do the nasty,
And do what the do and see what the does,
Either we gonna love what we do to each other,
Or just let it be what it was,
No harm, no foul, no commitment, no vows,
Maybe a contract or two,
But by that time I'm already tired of the way you like it, oh,
And let your body decide, exactly what it does,
But it's no secret baby, everybody fücks,
I know you don't do these type of things on the first night,
We both know it's wrong but fück it cause it feels right,
I know you don't do these type of things on the first night,
We both know it's wrong but fück it cause it feels right,
Love me tonight girl we won't meet again,
Don't fight the feeling cause love ain't a sin,
Let your body decide what it does, it's okay baby,
Let your body decide what it does,
It's okay baby cause everybody fücks,
Now I can hear your body calling me,
Tell me what it is, what's gon be,
Only got one night cause I'm...,
Lil mama is a bad one, ain't she? 
Maybe she might be a little timid,
Love when I get it,
Or I might even give a text when I'm finish,
Been doing all this talking, let's get it,
And you can tell me what you wanna do,
I guarantee you can do that,
Or you can teach me like a thing or two,
But I bet you I already knew that,
So one night one time baby girl,
Let's take this chance,
We ain't trying to be love strung,
But I know that Everybody ****s,
I know you don't do these type of things on the first night,
We both know it's wrong but fück it cause it feels right,
I know you don't do these type of things on the first night,
We both know it's wrong but fück it cause it feels right,
Love me tonight girl we won't meet again,
Don't fight the feeling cause love ain't a sin,
Let your body decide what it does, it's okay baby,
Let your body decide what it does,
It's okay baby cause everybody ****s,
Let your body go, let your feeling show,
Say what's on your mind, I already know,
I can read your eyes, see your body sign,
(Every sign you give baby) with a little bump and grind,
Nothing wrong, with a little bump and grind,
Baby there ain't nothing wrong, with a little bump and grind,
There ain't nothing wrong, with a little bump and grind,
Baby there ain't nothing wrong, with a little bump and grind,
Love me tonight girl we won't meet again,
Don't fight the feeling cause love ain't a sin,
Let your body decide what it does, it's okay baby,
Let your body decide what it does,
It's okay baby cause everybody ****s,
Believe that believe that baby,
Everybody ****s…

Details | Haiku | |

for Doctor Big

When you are retired,
you'll be just an old man,
with a fishing pole.

Details | Limerick | |

Annoying Image

My mirror continues to annoy me Its contorting the face that I see I cant be that old But the truth be told My birthday and the image agree

Details | Narrative | |

Not Needing a Meeting, Daily 31

Some work day mornings just fill with sour time.
The evenness of the florescent lights is annoying
I see all the familiar faces hating every moment along with me.
A department meeting, how horrifying.

The common voices outlining choices--that have nothing to do with you
Blacken and blue, I must stomach this painful gathering of shrews 
A pressured push in the brain
To not let this  poison my day
I rely on pleasant memories to carry me away:
The last cherished talk, the phone message from a friend.
I really can’t wait for this meeting to end.

Now my agitation has been noticed.
I am not paying attention--thinking about folly and Ben.
The expression on my face shows rejection
Can she see my recollection of the last time we met?
Crap now I am found out; she must be judging what my whole life is about.

Turn toward her stare, show sincerity and care
Easy now tiger-- and smile--give the moment awhile.
Save face, my Japanese ancestors would say.
I am disciplined, this is work--not time to play.
Don’t let distraction make you her prey.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Staircase

Tuesday pounced on Monday’s back
They rolled then tumbled through a crack
Wednesday came to sweep the floor
Thursday chased them out the door
Friday shook his weary head
Saturday went straight to bed
Sunday sought his peace in prayers
While Monday waited, by the stairs..

Details | Rhyme | |

A Christmas Dinner

Christmas day and it's time that we eat.
One more meal and I won't see my feet!
Dad lost sight of his a long time ago.
He's one size away from saying Ho Ho Ho!

After we gorge ourselves it's time for some treats.
I think I got diabetes from my last plate of sweets!
I unbutton my pants as I let out a sigh.
Good thing I'm not Santa or my reindeer couldn't fly.

Now to the tree to hand out our presents.
Feeling like kings even though we are peasants.
The kids are all playing and sharing their toys.
We're bloated and sleepy from our holiday joys.

Dustin Self 11/29/2012 (christmas dinner contest)

Details | Limerick | |

Tone it down to ''at least for the duration''

Time does our earth presence sever
But the post office is clever  
And offers for sale
For its eternal mail  
A stamp that is good forever

Author's note: The idea that anything associated with this planet will be consumed "forever" is peculiar and laughable.  It is also destructive in that business holds the truth in shadows.

Details | Rhyme | |


I wake for start of new day to find all nature stirring.
The bumble bee and humming bird around the feeder whirring.
The russet breasted robin has caught the early worm.
He'll feed it to his lady love before the final squirm.

Across the way the flower field is filled with willing workers.
Spring in my valley scurries on, it is no place for shirkers.
Not long ago I too was part of frantic interaction.
I watch with cup of coffee and a sigh of satisfaction.

I've served my time, no need to rise to annoying alarm.
Without me spring will carry on, I've rented out the farm.
The days whern I met life head-on is part of history.
In my newly welcomed leisure I let life come to me.

Details | Light Poetry | |

It's About Time

‘It’s about time you grew up!’
She heard her complain
As her head started thumping 
And she threw up again

‘That’s three times this week 
You’ve been out on the town
Don’t you think that at your age
You should calm yourself down?’

Concealed under covers
She tried to ignore
The judgmental spectre
That stood at the door

‘Oh please go away, 
You’re hurting my head
Can’t you see that I’m dying?
Just leave me in bed!’

But the censure continued
‘You look a right state
It serves your self right
For staying out late

And drinking ‘til all hours
You need to desist
You’ll ruin your liver
If you keep getting pissed

I don’t suppose for one minute
You’ll get up today
Just as well you’re not working
That’s all I can say!’

‘And I really do think
It’s about time you oughta
Set a better example
To me, as your daughter!’

Details | Free verse | |

Soy Sauce Spills

Soy sauce drains 
Into the white, clustered rice
Stepped on…
spills . . . 
Soy sauce taints
The whiteness of the grain
 It slips out of my hands
No point in crying out in rage
Though I was starving, 
I'll just eat another thing and start on a new page

I'm hungry like a swine
I wish I can earn back my snack!
I'm as angry as a bull
I'm about ready to attack! Attack!
Soy sauce packages
Fall unto the dirty school ground
Stepped on
By bratty, conceited teens
They really need to eat their greens
Instead of junkfood and pizza
They should drink some water
Instead of drinking sugary drinks or
 Sucking on popsicles obnoxiously
Why did the soy sauce spill? Seriously....

Details | Rhyme | |

Geek Mountain

It started quite some time ago
His name was Pitfall Harry
I learned of bits and algorithms
On a 2600 Atari

And then there came Nintendo
It began my end I think
For I had to rescue Princess Zelda
As a courageous lad named Link

I peered at that screen for hours
Each puzzle, each riddle, each stage
And Gannon was no match for me
My frenzied button rage

The torch then passed to Genesis
And with it Altered Beast
Addicted to those graphics
My life outside had ceased

Compulsion soon would fade
I slowly began to bore
Then Sony created the gamers dream
To brilliant to ignore

Dazzled bye amazing play
lost for a year or two
Acting as an exercise scarecrow
And girl repellant too

So now I have no gaming system
But it seems that my PC
Is the summit of Geek Mountain
And that's where you'll find me.
That last line written years ago
Such games are no longer fun
For Im filled with glee and happy to be
Reaquainted with the sun

Details | Verse | |

God hates me

 A day in my life
I thought to help the wife
I got the vacuum out
A little run about
I plugged it in the wall
Odd, no sound at all
It must have blown a fuse
So I undid all the screws
I changed the fuse with new
When they blow that's what you do
Then I plugged the thing back in
Odd, still nothing, no din

I made a cup of tea
The thought occurred to me
Was the fuse that I thought new
A useless dead fuse too
I scratched my head and thought
Has some fluff and stuff got caught
And blocked up all the tube
Which may have blown the fuse

I was in a flux
So I got my toolbox
First I undid this
Then I undid that
And by the time I undid more
I had a pile of scrap

Now I was in a flap
As I tried to build it back
But I knew I lost the plot
Cos the pile was such a lot
When I knew I could not win
I launched it in the bin

So I went round to the store
Cos my vacuum was no more
And invested in one new
Took it home just like you do
But by the time I did unpack
I had another heap of crap
Cardboard and all that
So I burned it round the back

I plugged my new vacuum in
Odd, still no distinctive din
I was most bemused
I thought a new one can't be fused
So I changed the fuse in new
Then thought I will vacuum , like you do

Odd, not a peep
From my new electric sweep
I thought there's something funny here
Something strange and queer
The room was not its norm
It had no bubbly warm
Then I looked at my aquarium
The fish they did not swim
No lights or bubbling glow
That keep them on the go

I switched the light shade on
No light there just was none
Then I tried the chandelier
No lights from that either

I sat down with a grin
It was hard to take it in
I reflected on the day
The one that cost me pay
I had dismantled something good
For no reason that I should
Then threw it in the bin
And then invested in another
When the first one had no bother

I felt so ashamed but I had myself to blame
I thought, Scott you are a nut
Scott you are a smut
Did you not realise
There has been a power cut


Details | Rhyme | |

Lions will be lions

Humiliation occurs
When pigs and monkeys roars
How a pig became a lion?
How , How a monkey roars?
That's when you stop saying NO
Humiliation occurs
When the lions are here
When the lions onshore
Pigs will be pigs
A monkey will stand for
A monkey , no less , no more

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Birth of Tradition

The Pilgrims were so happy to finally set foot on Plymouth Rock,
They decided that the time had come for each to take some stock.

They built themselves a Pilgrim town of houses and very little more,
Then they sent the women out to get groceries at the Pilgrim store.

Pilgrims lived in a time when it was thought that only women ever shop,
They weren’t very enlightened and men would never make that stop.

While the girls were at the store the men invited the Indians over for lunch,
So as soon as the women got home they had to go get more to munch.

The men started to toss an old pumpkin around that was long and kinda tall,
Then they played shirts against the skins in a game they named football.

While the women worked to prepare a feast, the men all went for a walk,
With buckled hats and feathered plumes their parade was all the talk.

The women wanted revenge so they picked cranberries to make an awful sauce,
Then they made the men eat it the stuff just to show them who was boss.

Then there came a heated discussion whether to use sweet potatoes or yams,
Then a second argument broke out about the use of turkey meat or hams.

It all seemed to calm back down when the Indian cornbread was finally tried,
And the Indians really liked the green beans topped with onions that were fried.

And when the day was done and the guests took home the left over feast,
The men cleaned up the dishes, since it’s what women liked to do the least.

This is how they all came together and invented the first Thanksgiving,
It gave them strength to continue on with the hard life they were living.

The Native Americans went back to their home and were grateful for so much,
“But next year,” they said, “let’s tell the English it’s our year to visit with the Dutch.”

Details | Free verse | |

Have You Ever Read

Dedicated to an author by the name of William Golding... Enjoy!!!

~Two boys meet on an island
~~One is skin 'n bones
~~~The other one is chubby

They discover a lagoon~
Ralph teases him by calling~~
him "Piggy" -  how mean!!~~~

Piggy asks him if
There are other people on 
The island with 'em

He has no clue
But this'll answer Piggy's question --
Other boys appear - 
All diverse shapes and sizes
What'll happen next??

You'll see...

Have you ever read The Lord of the Flies?
I recommend it if yah haven't read it yet - I must admit
It's a book full of adult words and it's simply...FASCINATING! - no lies
You should read it - or you'll regret it!

Details | Light Poetry | |

A Tough Christmas Cookie

Two billion people are of the Christmas persuasion, Two billion people celebrate that most joyous occasion. If that is true, Santa has to visit 23,148 people every second. Which really is an awful lot as near as I can reckon. I know that magic plays a part of Santa’s yearly shtick, But even taking that into account it really is a trick. Because that one second includes travel time and chimney scaling Note reading, cookie eating, and occasionally board game playing. Even taking into account that there may be a temporal causality loop, That allows for the suspension of time for him and his happy little group. Imagine how long it would take in a reindeer driven sleigh, To visit each town and stop at each house along his way. And think of the toys that delight and make the children want to shout, The number of elves that it takes to build them would really freak me out. The logistics of this endeavor can really start to boggle your mind, The importing of raw materials alone could set you way behind. To us, Santa may seem a jolly carefree guy, but he never gets to play hooky, To run an organization such as that he must be one tough Christmas cookie.

Details | Light Poetry | |

Ian's Game Part One

When our kids where little it was our attention that they would seek
And so we’d set aside a night for games in the middle of each week.

Each Wednesday we would all sit down just to play a game,
Life, Scrabble or Monopoly to us they were all the same.

We would spend the night laughing and eating hot buttered corn,
Rolling dice or spinning wheels with pieces well used and worn.

One day our son told us that he’d invented a game to play,
One that he wanted us all to try out on our next game day.

When the time came we all sat down to see the game he’d made,
To learn the rules so we’d all know exactly how it played.

He opened up the board to reveal the spaces that he’d laid out,
A path that seemed to take its time as it meandered along the route.

There were extra branches of spaces that shot off to the side,
They had no real purpose in the game but they beckoned to be tried.

There was a spinner that he’d made and a pair of bright red dice,
Two stacks of special cards to draw one called naughty the other nice.

The hand drawn spaces looped around and then they doubled back,
Connecting up once again just like a Christmas railroad track.

There was paper money that he’d made and a shoebox for a bank,
And a basket filled with numbered tiles that was turned by a crank.

There were bits and pieces of lots of games that he had put together,
Some other stuff like a polished stone and a treasured Blue Jay feather.

Once he had it the way he wanted he said that we could start the game,
So I asked him what were the rules of play and did it have a name?

Details | Quatrain | |

Hey There Tubby

I get on my bike and I pedal for hours You'd think I'd be skinny by now Ha! Not a chance my belly's still fat I look like an over stuffed sow Pants are so large they could sail a boat As the mast on the big ocean blue People are cruel and say “Hey there Tubby!” “Better stay away from the stew!” Try not to show how much it bothers me Saying, “Your mother dresses you funny!” But deep down inside I've lost all my pride To be skinny I'd give lots of money My scale says, “One at a time please!” I kick it in anger 'cross the room I've no one to blame for getting this way It's the buckets of food I consume So call me a fatty or call me a tub But don't call be late for my chow I'll soon get serious about losing this fat But it's just not the time right now! © Jack Ellison 2012 This was written before I went on a mission and lost 30 pounds!

Details | Couplet | |

Hide and Seek

Cat and Mouse: hide and seek
This could take an hour or week

No one wants to seem too bold
So we put our love on hold

A peek here and a peek there
Wondering if we really dare

Wondering what the seconds bring
Wondering if the phone will ring

Wondering, wondering:  peek a boo
You’re hiding…. but I SEE you

I see past that great big wall
Your heart’s ready for the fall

I know that you caught the bait
But I sit and wait and wait

I’m patient, got time of day
But oh, what if you get away!

Cat and mouse: hide and seek
Oh, my knees are getting weak

Oh, this heart’s sure to explode
The waiting’s gone to overload

One more second's just too much
No time for cat games and such

Hide and seek…is getting old
Here I am! My love is bold!

Ready? You'll be caught real tight!
Cause boy, your just out of sight!

Eileen Manassian Ghali

Details | Light Poetry | |

Is it Here Yet

Just a single week from now today will be a week ago, By the time that tomorrow’s today we’ll be on the way you know. Then yesterday will be two days ago and today will be yesterday, And two days from now will be tomorrow at least that’s what they say. Before you know it the time will pass don’t say there was no warning, Pretty soon we will all wake up and it will finally be Christmas morning. But why does it have to take so long and why do the days grow longer? Why does each passing minute make the anticipation that much stronger? I wish that there was a way to make Christmas come today, But then I guess all I’d really be doing is wishing my life away.

Details | Rhyme | |

Pillow Talk Abuse collaboration with PD

PILLOW TALK ABUSE     (collaboration)

by~ Andrea Dietrich

Again you’re droning on and on and on. 
Yada, yada, yada, yada, yada. 
My time for beauty sleep will soon be gone. 
Why can’t you close your eyes?  You know you oughta. 
Just press those lips together tight and zip! 
My lids are getting heavy as you talk. 
So now I offer you this little tip. 
Why don’t you go outside and take a walk? 
The clear night air might open up your mind
before you kill the bush you’re beating round. 
You’re killing ME; I hate to be unkind, 
but when I start to doze, I hear that sound . . . 
Yakety, yakety, yakety, yakety, yak. . . 
Please shut your trap. We’ve long since hit the sack!

by~ Poet Destroyer

Congratulations for thinking your work is done.
You may be tired  but you’re not the only one.
I sure hope you like spending your time all alone
All the young ones are grown and away from home.
So, I have no choice to yap yap yap' when you're around.
But, I do this to annoy, before my other annoying snoring sound.
Ever since I remember the beauty line is to late.
Don't forget my yapping mouth is what brings dinner to your plate?
But think of the funny way you want me to zip my lips tight.
My yakety yak is what gets me going through the night.
Retire your eyes else where, if you can't hear me out!
Wouldn't you rather me beat the bush, than to hear me shout.
Your ungrateful ways are like a sleeping pill.
Talking to you is like talking to a wall~ " oh! What a thrill!"
Maybe if you say a word or two, your mouth would put me to sleep
So my dear, talking to you is better than counting sheep.

Hope PD won't mind me showing me this one again!

Details | Shape | |

Christmas Tradition


                                                  " No! "
                                                 But I say
                                               " Let's go! "
                                             It's my favorite
                                           time of year again!
                                          Let's put on our boots
                                       fleeced lined jackets, gloves,
                                    and head to the mountains for our
                                  annual search for the "perfect" tree!
                             Every year, this one event,  a family tradition...
                        has almost landed us in divorce court!  Why, we've
                      almost been featured in the local newspaper with a headline:
                    "Local Father, Weilding Hatchet, Ends A Family’s Tradition”
                    It's not that my husband doesn't enjoy the spirit of the season...
                  Perhaps it's just the memory of the times we've been stuck in the
                 mud, while he's had to trudge back two miles to find the nearest phone.  
            Maybe he remembers the time when the dang tree slipped out of it's ropes
            wiggled from the top of our car, with no place to pull over… in a storm,…. 
         (he had to peek through the branches that covered the windshield to see the
        highway..all the while, muttering language not quite in the jolly holiday spirit!)    
     While those in the backseat, singing "Jingle Bells", were enjoying hot chocolate…
                              and raving over the beauty of the season!
                    This year....he declares that we are getting an artificial tree!!

For Paula's Contest: Traditions
Note: (Actually, if truth be known, he is a very good sport, and we usually go into Lassen National Forest, and get a permit to cut our own tree.  A wonderful outing, and a fun day!)

Details | Limerick | |

My Sweet Ride

~ There once was a car that never did start it sputtered and spit and even did fart I love that car dear to lose it I fear I shall never forsake that quaint Dodge Dart Each memory of joy of days long ago still fill my heart in times I feel low you are my sweet ride for we stand side by side although our time spent is a time in-tow ~ "Contest" LOL

Details | Limerick | |

The reluctant companion

The wife plans a spree to buy all
With husband on board at the mall
But as this takes place
He just looks for a space
To sit on a bench in the hall

Details | Rhyme | |

Tin Ribs

Well good golly her name is Holly and she has a lot of front
The first time that she met me, named me granddad elephant
Called her nanny, nanny coffee pot so she would have the set
Very forward is our Holly and I hardly know her yet

I gave her a nickname as a tease, just for a jest
Tin ribs what I call her so skinny not a pest
Likes Hannah Montana, club penguin and doing make up with sis
Dancing, high school musical and sweet and sour chicken is bliss

Loves pasta, reads Jacqueline Wilson, likes pink
Shooting basketball hoops after school is a must I think
Hates doing homework can’t stand candy floss
I even bet she thinks she’s the boss

Just a little tin ribs with much time to grow
Granddad elephant is glad we met don’t you know
See you soon Holly till then just take care 
Try doing some homework it seems only fair

Eat lots of candy floss to help you fill out
Then one day maybe I’ll be able to shout
No tin ribs any more but grand daughter elephant instead 
Perhaps not though its just  a tease in my head

Details | Kyrielle | |

Santa Mommy

My nose is getting red like Santa’s perhaps I’ll grow a beard
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
I’ve hidden all the wrapped up boxes and all the clutters cleared
My son is on the air-o-plane he is getting VERY, very near!

Got the balsam wreathes up from Big Y and hung them on the doors
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
Go pick a pretty bulb out from the boxes on the floor
and set it out at ready for the big tree will soon appear.

Soon I’ll drive to JFK to get the MAN that big ole kid
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
If I had a bright red sleigh I’d get there fast like Santa did,
avoiding all the Yuletide traffic, why yes, I’d steer right clear.

With my red nose and a borrowed beard, red hat and all
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
I’d shift the pillow in my drawers and the crowd would be appalled
You’d see security winking “There’s a coo-coo over here!”

They’d let me through with no pat down, no scan of Santa’s tummy
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
I’d shout it to the customs guards “It’s just HIS loony Mummy!”
I need him to set up the pine tree before he disappears.

His friends have called their all waiting there is more of them than me 
Welcome to my holiday home at this special time of year
One of the few times I see that boy by time and spaces decree
I’ll call them all to gather for the trimmings of yesteryear.

Details | Sonnet | |

Santa Scrooge

(an oldie "light" sonnet)

The Santa that I know is not so nice.
If there's a gift I tell him that I'd like,
he only will complain about the price,
and when December comes, he goes on strike!

For Santa is no sweet and jolly gent.
For instance, when it's time to do the tree,
he hates to have to bring it from the basement;
I trim it then without the grumble-bee.

It hurts my back to put up outside lights,
But I don't bother my "dear" Claus for that.
And so our house stands naked through the nights
of Christmas time ‘cause Santa is a rat!

My Santa Baby's great at subterfuge.
So ho, ho, ho for me.  I married Scrooge!

Details | Couplet | |



Yesterday is the day from which you came
Tomorrow is  the destination you will never gain 
Seeking tomorrow thinking it is near
But at 12:01 AM is tomorrow really here
Time shows you just came from yesterday 
And stepped into times grasp of what is now today 
Once again you find tomorrow is not here
Just wait 24 hours - time whispers in your ear 
And then tomorrow will appear 
Time of course is playing its eternal joke
For again at time appointed - tomorrow is up in smoke
Time it should be known is an unawakened dream
With no more substance than ripples in a stream
Never ask time about future intentions
Future is another of time's jokester inventions

Details | Monorhyme | |

Midnight Madness

Midnight Madness (Ah! Earth Hour,2012)

All this low tech by candle light
Doesn't do much for my eyesight,
But, pulled the breaker at midnight
Having set up picnic delights.
Marshmellows, grahams, choc'late--Right!
Roasting them o're candle's light.
Toasty charred outsides black as night
Inside sticky sweet 'mellow--Bite!
Ummmm! Another...the flame in sight
Whoa! It's on fire! Whooosh! Now--Bite!
Bag is'ams wrapped tight...
Flame still burns another one--Bite!
Guess I'll try fix the next one right.
Melting choc'late, 'mellow, gr'ams--Bite!
Ummmm! It's squishing tongue fights
To catch each drop of choc'late mite!
Oh!No! An empty bag! What fright!
Yet, that's not all...It's near daylight!
Not just one Hour for Earth's plight,
But five were spent in my requite.
Warm and was fun in spite
Of low tech!...Maybe...more tonight?

~by deborah burch

"Please try to go Beyond Earth Hour":
There are many ways to conserve without really giving up anything...
Share marshmellows over a candle for an hour on a weekend night with your children or 
Flip the breaker for an Hour--each week and create memories while helping conserve...
Be creative...Make life fun!!

*For Nikko's contest: "Beyond Earth Hour..."

Details | Rhyme | |

The Battle of the Shearing Shed

Ronald was a tough old ram, the biggest of his breed
Daniel was a clipperman, renowned of shearing deed
Many sheep were sheared that day and woolless they had fled
Before those two met in affray and battled in the shed!

Ronald, he had seen old Wallace wrestled to the floor,
Mugged of his dignity and fleece, and knew that it was war
And seeing that his turn was nigh, his hooves he dug in deep
He'd fight and though perhaps he'd die, at least he'd die a sheep.

Daniel had no time to waste, he'd quotas set to keep
And unprepared, he reached in haste to take the waiting sheep
But Ronald steeled himself as Daniel took him by the horn
And, rearing, pulled himself away before he could be shorn.

Off-balance, Daniel stumbled, to Ronald's great delight
Onto his knees he tumbled as the shears flew out of sight
And Ronald now unhanded felt his victory increase
Protecting his sheep dignity and, likewise, his sheep fleece.

But Daniel was not beaten yet, he knew that he'd faced worse 
His mind was still determined set, he rose up with a curse
But still he was unsteady and Ronald was a ram
His head was lowered ready and he charged the clipperman

Ronald's head met Daniel's side and toppled him again
This time headfirst and to collide his head against the grain.
Leaving, stunned, the clipperman upon the wooden floor
In final victory, the ram strolled out the open door.

But, alas, 'tis not the way that sheep triumph at last
And Daniel would not see the day that any sheep got past
Despite Ram Ronald's victor's pride, the shearer would not yield
So followed a less dignified pursuit around the field.

Ronald, he was fast and he had four legs matched to two
So Daniel was outclassed, if that was all that he could do,
But he also had a sheepdog and so Ronald was defeated
He would have had the victory, if Daniel hadn't cheated.

Details | Rhyme | |

Boring Class but Saved by the Bell!

Clock ticking like crazy while my teacher is explaining
Scribbling on my paper during the time that is remaining.
Watching the clock religiously as if time would speed up
the teacher takes a sip from his big blue coffee cup.

Due to his monotony I have no idea what hes speaking about.
as he writes on the white board I try to tune him out.
Interrupted while thinking about what lunch is today
my teacher asks about the topic and if I have anything to say.
He stares at me rudely as a smirk spreads on his face
I know hes secretly excited that he gets to put me in my place.

I stutter as I try to remember what exactly he was asking
I wouldn't be in this dilemma if I was good at multitasking.
Press my lips together and hope the bell will ring
but I feel as helpless as a baby bird with a broken wing.
Maybe my facial expression will make the teacher think I'm pondering
even though he knows this whole time my mind has been wandering.

Teacher bows his head in complete and utter frustration
I knot my eyebrows together in false concentration.
The teacher clears his throat but its not heard very well
because at this moment I have been saved by the bell!

Details | Free verse | |

marking my friends on poetry soup.- the Lord helped me fight death and won.

i don't want to be just marking

time.  i died on november 20,

2008, during surgery.  i was

on a vent when i awakened 

december 2, sisters'

birthday. what made me llive

i'll never know.  i know there

are things to do on this side

of death.

i have no time for marking time.

i have a stupid bag hanging from

my side now.  i am supposed to

"get comfortable with it".  well

that was a laugh.

that was a laugh until i thought

of the people that had these

things with no hope of ever

getting away from them.

i am so lucky.  14 days i laid

on a vent, then 22 more.

i came home 3 days, 


i had
great pain in my chest...
well this is great i said,

a pulmonary emboli, 15 more

days, three days home.

then back to e.r. blood pressure

too high.  this bought me 

4 more days in e.r.

i am home now and finally 

have spent 19 days home.

i feel every pain and i feel

every time that i feel good

yes, i am never marking

time again.....there is

something about fighting

for your life and your sanity

that straightens things out.

i don't recommend it but

i wish i could let your hearts

know what i know.


Details | Rhyme | |

Spring time for me

Spring is in the air
'cause I feel it in my head.
I haven't slept in days now.
Oh!How I miss my bed.

The flowers are all so gorgeous
when they finally start to bloom.
But for me and all my allergies
It's a time for pain and gloom.

There's nothing like a spring time scene
with colors for all to see.
I take my shots and all my meds.
Oh!Why this happen to me.

Spring is in the air now
and I can't see or hear.
But even after all my pain
I love this time of year!

Dustin Self (spring is in the air contest)

Details | Free verse | |

Packing Blues

Have the old time down and out

packing blues.

Moving our cares away,

with that old time packing blues.

Boxes small, boxes large, so many

boxes all around our rooms,

putting things in, taking things our,

oh I hate those packing blues.

Finding room, moving the boxes

to one room then another,

have to go get some more to

add to our old time packing blues.

Written 8-17-11

Details | Light Poetry | |

In a Hurry

I'm in a hurry I cannot stay, it seems the time just slips away.
I try so hard to get things done, no time to do it all under the sun. 
Deadlines here and deadlines there, so many deadlines everywhere!
I have to work, no time to play, just to get things done today!

Details | Light Poetry | |

Another Year, Another Birthday

Another Year…Another Birthday!

I have a secret admirer
He goes wherever I go
I try to  hide from him
But he’s a persistent beau
I’ve tried to outwit him
Have done so for years
Bur he always shows up
As my birthday nears

When I was a young girl
He intrigued me so
But now that I’m older
He has to go!
He’s relentless, obstinate
And to my chagrin
I know for a fact
That one day he’ll win!

I try to ignore  him
Pretend he’s not there
But it’s my 84th Birthday
Oh…it just isn’t fair!
But I’ll not give in
I’m still in my prime
My unwelcome guest
Is Old Father Time

I eat my veggies
I cream my face
And I exercise
At a ferocious pace
I’m one step ahead
But he’s closing in
 If I make it to 100
Then we both shall win!

Copyright©2012 Beatrice Boyle
(All rights reserved)

Details | Free verse | |

Naked holes.

Imagine a life without holes.
An unstable world,a round figure of nothing.
A straight line,smells like ptomaine.
Holes are everywhere,white and black,
polychromatic,pretty and ugly.
Holes that you may fill,other you may not.
They can think,memorize,imagine.
Emotional holes,logical,positional,
in a chessboard,a second before a knight arrives.
Holes in my body,in your body,his or her,
screaming for pleasure,with or without morals.
Living there,breathe,judge the way you treat them.
A hole can kill you,can make you suffer.
They are in brains,in hearts.
In great losses.
When out of nowhere they are born,proud,
captivated eventually,died full of years.
Significant holes,in maps,in history.
They feed on hopes,feelings,aspirations,
organic,inorganic matters.
Holes reborn,only looked at us.

Details | I do not know? | |

Forgetfulness x-x

Oh no!! I forgot – I had a plate of dessert In the cool freezer Oh no!! Dad forgot – He left his blue bowl of fruit On the clean counter!

Details | Rhyme | |


You can read this if you want to,
it's entirely up to you.
It's really just a waste of your time.
There's gotta be something you'ld rather do!

The things I'm gonna mention
ain't worth the time of day.
But that ain't gonna stop me,
so I'll get underway.

Ageing has its problems,
which is really nothin' new.
As you get older three things happen,
first you lose your memory and - I forget the other two!

My girlfriend made me chicken.
Her chicken made me cough!
I told her, next time, she makes it,
she should take the feathers off!

Another thing don't make no sense,
consequently, I'd like to know.
Why do we call Rush Hour, "Rush Hour",
when the traffic goes so slow?

There's three sure ways to do a job.
You must be clever, I'll admit!
You hire someone; you do it yourself;
or you forbid your kids to do it!

I'm just biding my time with this Drivel.
Sorry I bored you my friend.
Fortunately I ran out of stupid stuff.
That's it - It's over - the end!

Disregard All of the Above!
(Any resemblance to me and a
real poet, depends on what
you're drinking!)

Details | Quintain (English) | |

No Chapeau

One time in the past, I saw a picture of me.
I was a child; I wore a cowboy suit with cowboy hat.
I don’t remember this, but it was still part of history.
There was only, one other time, other than that.
This time I wore, baseball cap and helmet at bat,

I knew early on, my head would be bare eternally.
For my head was too big and also to flat,
Believe me whoever I asked, would definitely agree.
The thing I would use a hat for, would be to swat a gnat.
So I really have no favorite, definitely not, a Top Hat.

written for
Sponsor Carol Brown 
Contest Name My Favorite Hat or Bonnet 

Details | Rhyme | |


Uncle Sam demands you file your taxes timely,
no excuses accepted...he will impose a fine; 
don't think of committing the perfect crime...
court appearance and jail time await the sly!

As anyone can see, honesty and promptness are required...
and to save money, you may choose to file your own taxes,
but be aware of the fine print leading to consequences;
is TurboTax the answer? Don't trust it, you may be fined!

Ask for an extension? Isn't it quite costly?
Can you pay on time to avoid the extra fee?
Now, don't make plans to buy an expensive plasma tv,
you willl have a better chance at winning the Lottery!

Heed my advice and do everything legally and expeditiously,
I have done this for forty-three years and never cheated;
I slept at night, and woke up without worrying daily...
reminding myself that honesty and promptness are required!

Details | Rhyme | |

My FAVORITE Classic TV Show

My Favorite Classic T.V. Show A classic t.v. show that I thought was fun and silly. Was one I watched as a child: “The Beverly Hillbillies.” There was Jed. Granny. Jethro and Elly May too. You just didn’t know what these folks were going to do! Granny would offer possum pie or some “vittles.” There was no tellin’ what she was fixin’ in her griddle! This family would “dance a jig.” Or even “sing a song. And then they would all gather around “the cement pond.” It didn’t seem to matter what was served on the dinner plate. Ole Jethro would never get full. No matter how much he ate! Elly loved to have her many animals in the home. No matter where she went. She was never alone! This Clampett family brought joy through our t.v. I still watch this show. But just occasionally. This classic show is from a time in the past. But it still brings good memories that will always last! By Jim Pemberton "The Beverly Hillbillies"

Details | Light Poetry | |

Awe Your Full Of It

<         twenty twelve

                  What The Hell !

                         cosmic conjuction
                               What's it's Function !

                                         ecologic collapse

                                                   Only Perhaps !

                                                             galactic beings

                                                                     I've Been Seeing !

                                                                             think it's all phony
                                                                                      And Full Of Balony  !

Entry For Gareth James's
2012 Contest
G.L. All



Details | Light Poetry | |

Dear Miss Monkey Manners II

Dear Miss Monkey Manners, I hope that you can solve a problem for an old baboon,
I’ve said some things to a dear friend of mine and it makes me feel like I’m a buffoon.
I said that, “God created Charles Darwin because he was so disappointed in monkeys.”
How was I to know when I spoke that he and Darwin’s uncle were at one time bunkies?
I only meant it as a passing humor aimed at pointing out our man like flaws,
I didn’t know that this friend and Charles Darwin shared the same grandpas?
Anyway, now he’s mad at me and called me a bigot so now I need a plan,
I want to show him, that except for their smell, there’s nothing I hold against man?
But if he doesn’t get over it pretty quickly and take that chimp from off his shoulder,
I’m going to get sick of his blue butt attitude and kick him in his banana holder.

My Dear and Gentle Monkey “Man”, I think that the time has come for action,
A stinging shot to his low land region might give us both great satisfaction.
This baboon friend of yours is a member of a new and obnoxious breed,
We must be rid of him and his ilk before political correctness plants a seed.
When the time comes that we can’t make a joke about how man came from we apes,
Is the same time that a never ending stream of flying monkeys from my butt escapes.
Don’t you dare offer up a single syllable of a word aimed at reconciliation.
To make a slam of the works of man is the hallmark of simian civilization.
Instead, the next time you see a group of men walking through your forest setting,
Dare your misguided chum to go up and talk to them, he’ll swing away I’m betting.
There is only one thing more distasteful to me than the babblings of a liberal Baboon,
And that’s one who, when forced to face his own convictions, babbles a different tune.

Details | Lyric | |

A Florida Christmas Jingle

Written to the tune of "Jingle Bells"

Here in Florida,
We don't get any snow,
We don't have sleighs to ride,
But we do have mistletoe!

For a little Christmas jaunt,
We'll drive 'round after dark,
To view the Christmas-lighted homes,
And displays at the park.

Ho! Ho! Ho! 
He! He! He!
Christmas time is here.
Let's deck the halls and shop the malls,
To spread some Christmas cheer!
Ho! Ho! Ho!
He! He! He!
Christmas time is here.
Let's deck the halls and shop the malls,
To spread some Christmas cheer!

Driving through the rain,
In a souped up Cheverolet,
Traffic's moving slow,
But hey, that's A-okay.

Christmas carols blare,
From the Chevy's radio,
We're having fun singing along,
Making words up as we go!

Ho! Ho! Ho!
He! He! He!
Christmas time is here.
Let's deck the halls and shop the malls,
To spread some Christmas cheer!
Ho! Ho! Ho!
He! He! He!
Christmas time is here.
Let's deck the halls and shop the malls,
To spread some Christmas cheer!

12/4/2011 for Debbie Guzzi's Deja vu Christmas contest.

Trying to think of a Christmas song or story that I could modernize, Jingle Bells popped in my head.  I live in Florida and it doesn't (usually) snow here, so tried to come up with a snowless version of the song.

Details | Rhyme | |

Vampire Sheep From Hell

Once upon an olden time and in a far off land
A castle stood above a town, mysterious and grand
Though locals spoke about the place, down in the town below
‘Twas gossip and just rumours, for the townsfolk didn’t know.

But in that towering castle, kept away from mortal men
A vampire count lived peacefully and did not bother them
For he was not inclined to all the usual vampire labours
And did not think it sociable to snack upon the neighbours.
Instead, so that the villagers enjoyed a peaceful sleep,
The count would, nightly, drink his fill from off the local sheep.

But many plans gang aft agley, as Burns chose to remark
And so it was one fateful night of strangeness after dark
A poacher out at midnight looking upwards saw on high
A swarm of woolly bats which flew across the moonlit sky.

Perhaps there’s rules to say how large a vampire flock must be
Though why they waited till that night is still a mystery.
But seeking blood those vampire sheep in bat form took to flight
Descending on the sleepy town en masse that fateful night. 
The flock of woolly bats came while the village was asleep,
To land at bedroom windows, where they changed back into sheep.

Awaking sleeping villagers with sounds of breaking glass
As sheep fell into bedrooms seeking something more than grass
And broke the night so quiet before with terror and with screams
As nightmare sheep intruded on more normal night time dreams.

The lady mayor awoke to find a very puzzled ewe
Trying to discover what a vampire sheep should do
Whilst other villagers elsewhere likewise woke and saw
The vampire sheep discovering their own most vital flaw
The local population was afflicted by a flood
Of dentally deficient sheep attempting to draw blood.

Evolution plays cruel tricks to shape what ought to be
And vampire sheep are not designed to draw blood dentally
For all their woolly vampire ways, it still has to be said
No canine teeth have ever grown inside a woolly head
It’s on this taxonomic point that vampire future hangs
To draw blood most effectively you need well pointed fangs.

But, nothing daunted, still those sheep did not think beneath
Their vampire failure to the fault of blunt grass chewing teeth
Deciding that perhaps sheepkind would offer better yields
The vampire flock with one accord all headed for the fields
Where came the first rays of the dawn to end this chilling rhyme
And killed the vampire sheep from hell, who could not tell the time.

Details | Blank verse | |



Create a universe with space,
and stars and suns, then planets.
Add some life and watch it grow;
almost nothing to almost something.

Implant a need to change, evolve,
until finally one arrives at sentience.
We now have human, which thinks,
therefore it is, but often chooses not to.

Our very human need brings order into,
and from surrounding chaos,
or so we imagine. Hence years, seconds
and so forth will codify time.

This time is *very *important;
brought in to rule over us all,
while some changes of time
are turned into veritable deities.

One grand god is to be worshipped
when he grants us his New Year,
for joy and wild celebration,
and sundry bacchanalian pursuits.

But, dammit, an invented construct
starts whether we're awake to scream
or not, so this one thinking human
prefers pursuit of non-bacchanalian sheep,

and sleep ....

Alan McAlpine Douglas

Details | Couplet | |


          LOST LOSER

Bad enough to hear ‘you lose’
Then a flock of mail flies in
Don’t know which one you should choose
Then you glimpse ‘an AWESOME win’

Maybe it’s my humble past
Maybe it’s my country school
No one smiles when they are last
If you do --you’re called a fool.

Glory is its own reward
If you win your heart beat sings
Friends will greet you if they can
Life is sweet on eagle wings

Time is precious, time is short
Worlds await on shelves in books
Brush twitch paintings-- feet seek sport
I crave salmon on a hook

Ungrateful twit that I may seem
Courtesy is sometimes missing
My head I'll dunk in ice clogged stream
Avoid the flock of kiss kiss kissing

If you note that I have lost
Spare me time and spare me shame
Spare yourself the time it costs
To remind me that I’ve lost again

Victoria Anderson-Throop
Nov 30, 2012

Details | Rhyme | |

Vapor Lock

Once upon a time while touring ancient Egypt land,
A frugal auld tourist from the bonny land of Scotland,
Decided the mysterious pyramids he desired to see,
And he demanded to visit them for a very nominal fee!

He repaired to his hotel bar, sat down and ordered a drink.
He needed ample time upon this bold adventure to think.
After downing several tumblers of Gordon's gin and tonic,
He thought, "By jove!  A trip by a camel would be exotic!"

He scurried to the local camel rental agency very much areel,
To haggle with the rental feller and strike up a deal,
That would guarantee a care-free trip to the pyramids and back!
An agreeable pact was struck and he gave the man some jack.

Just a few hot and dusty kilometers out of town,
The camel stopped, snorted and lay down!
The irate Scot hailed a traveler heading back east,
Saying, "Send that guy out here to rouse this insolent beast!"

Rubbing his nose and scratching he head he kicked the camel fast!
The hapless camel broke wind with a most resounding blast!
"Aha!" explained the agent, "The problem was easy to unlock!
This old feller had a very serious case of vapor lock!"

Robert L. Hinshaw,CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Details | Blank verse | |









Details | Rhyme | |


If I lived to be 101,
Could I still be able have some fun?
Or would I feel too old to play,
Just like a kid for one more day?

I’d want to jump rope to a rhyming song,
But my knees would creak as I skipped along.
And I couldn’t pop wheelies on my bike
Or eat all the junk food that I like.

I’d love to climb an apple tree
But I’d wrench my back out, probably!
And turning cartwheels in the grass,
Might land me down on my fat head!

Surely I’d be out of my gourd
If I flipped off a diving board-
A splash from my great canon ball,
Would fling my teeth right past the wall!

And playing tricks on Mischief Night
By giving neighbors quite a fright
Would leave me not only out of breath,
But scare me nearly half to death!

Sitting alone in my rocking chair
As children’s laughter filled the air
Would drive me nuts and make me crazy.
If all I’d be was wrinkled and lazy!

Yes, 101 is too old for me
‘Cause I’d want to feel young and live care free.
So I think that it would be just fine
If I only live to be 99!

By Sue Burd

Details | Free verse | |

What Have You Done

My mind still wants to continue,
But my body feels the tiredness,
Can’t take it anymore I told you,
What have you done to me?

My eyes look so weary,
My hands are in pain already,
How many hours of spending time with you?
FACEBOOK games……… it’s your fault!!

I’m already addicted to you ever since,
My time is wasting but I think I’m enjoying?
Well it’s time for me to sleep you know,
Till we meet again tomorrow, oh I hope so.

For Skat's Under 15 Lines Contest
8th Place Winner

Details | Lyric | |


My rhymes are timeless while this time is lifeless
why is life this kind less, reminds me that this
mind is spineless ready to tip and quit, as
my lies become mindless and get swollen shut
and Stuck up inside my sinus
Drivin in my prime but with no optimus
Victim to the flip-side of the Midas
Running through my blood like a virus
The sun makes my skin mundane
rubbin on ben gay but get arthritis
touch spermicide and converts to hepatitis
I hit the plus sign but it just musters up a minus
I'm seen sucking my thumb like the peanut's Linus
I run and duck when I hear the sirens cause
I abducted the president's Nike air pumps
now air force one is trying to find us
I'm at my desk obsessin about success but
This whole time its been right behind us

Details | Rhyme | |

Springtime with Edouard Manet

Easter is a time where we construe
The beauty of renewal blooming through
Little birds that chirp above the vales
While sweeter ladies peep at passing males

Charming is the humour passing round
Faint scent of Tulips, Daffodils abound
Strolling couples giggle by a stream
Planning the delights they like to dream

Gazebos filled with bands that blow their brass
Shiny belts and buckles, best in class
‘Le déjeuner sur l'herbe’ a luncheons treat
A very Manet way in which to meet

Ah Easter is a time for daring stuff
Two clothed men that dine with naked fluff
At last the joys of springtime are revealed
Milk white flesh and precious else concealed

©david byrne Easter 2012 

Details | Light Poetry | |


Time to pull off the coats
Push the heavy suits to the back
Open the windows and turn off the heat
Sprint time is here, fire up the grill
Sit on the deck, enjoy and chill
Listen to the birds as they conversate and sing
Time for light colors and showing off the bling
Turn up the c-d, it's time for spring

Details | Rhyme | |


What happened yesterday Is in the past, Gone away. What happened tomorrow No-one knows Joy or sorrow. What happened today Tomorrow I will say One thing I am sure Now or when Will always follow What happened then.

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Promised Land

Forty years is a pretty long time to be out on a camping trip,
And when you’re living on a mountainside you can start to lose your grip.
So God called his people together to tell them about his plan,
“Folks I just wanted to say, I’m sending you to the Promised Land.”
He talked to them of a land that was flowing with milk and honey,
And told them that to own it all wouldn’t cost them any money.
God divided them up into tribes and then into armies and finally squads,
They thought that their vision of milk and honey must be different than God’s.
When they marched into the land they found people who were very big,
They thought that this land of giants would snap them like a twig.
The walls of the cities in this land were tall and they towered to the sky,
They thought that God must be mad at them so they went to ask him why.
“Lord, it’s going to be tough to attack walls made strong with mortar and bricks,
When we are all only tiny little people running around with pointy sticks.”
God railed at them for having so little faith and told them to attack,
They sort of looked at each other and then told God that he could have it back.
But the Lord told them all to hunker down and do their very best to be brave,
After all the time that Moses had invested God was certainly going to save.
And so they were delivered and the land became their home to keep,
They just never would have guessed that the rent would be so steep.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Cruise

My wife's been whining for some time now
Wanting me to take her on a cruise
Now we've been married for twenty-five years
So she wasn't gonna let me refuse

So we packed up our bags and off we went
Kinda like a second honeymoon
I said, "Fix us some sandwiches to eat on the way"
Then I told her we'd be there soon

She said, "Where are we going Hawaii or Bahamas?"
I said, "This place is better than that"
We stopped at a place that said, "Paddle Boats Here"
I said, "We're here, now don't forget your hat"

Well, now needless to say, I did something wrong
'Cause my wife started throwing such a fit
We went around circles for at least twenty minutes
'Cause everytime I'd paddle, she'd quit

Now I wasn't gonna pay for no life perservers
My bicycle tubes worked fine
My wife had that tube wrapped around her neck
And both of her hands around mine

Well, to make a long story short, she'll never forget
That time I took her on a cruise
And everytime I even try to forget it
I remember that horrible bruise

Details | Quintain (English) | |

This Year's Bucket List

The years are picking up speed This last one just seemed to fly To old age I soon must concede But before life passes me by Hang Gliding I really must try ..
Barbara Gorelick 1/8/12 Happy New Year contest

Details | Free verse | |

Star Trek 3 and a half, The Wrath of Klingon Commander Kruge


Star Trek 2: Kirk has a grand battle with a villain from the original series.  Spock
dies saving the ship and his body is deposited on the Genesis Planet where an
experimental technology creates life from nothing

Star Trek 3: Kirk returns to the Genesis Planet to retrieve Spock's resurrected
body.  Commander Kruge, intercepts Enterprise wanting the power of the
Genesis Project for military purposes.  Kirk's son, a Genesis scientist, is Killed
on the Genesis Planet by Kruge.  After the destruction of Enterprise, Kirk kills
Kruge on the planet's surface and then takes over the Klingon ship

Star Trek 4: The returning mutineers are forced to go back
in time to find Humpback Whales to bring forward to the present time to save
Earth from a curious whale-loving alien race

Star Trek 5: The Enterprise is coerced to go on a mission to find "God", who
turns out to be just a minor deity pretending to be  'all that'

Star Trek Generations--Kirk dies in a desert region of some obscure planet


Kirk never took into consideration that commander Kruge and Kirk's son, David,
were also killed on the life regenerating Genesis Planet.  That's when Commander
Kruge, resurrected, young, fit and as handsome as any strapping Klingon youth
could hope to be, came storming back for revenge

AND NOW.........


Klingon Bird of Prey
Cloaked and humming at warp speed
Like Tom Cruise with a swollen head
Feeling the Genesis invulnerability
The Enterprise unsuspecting
Decloaking, salvos away
Can you imagine how priceless the look
Kirk seeing Christopher Lloyd's exploded face?

Haha, Kirk.  You criminal!!
I'll bet your eyes can't believe
You came back for you pointy-eared friend
Never once did you think about me
I killed your son once, Kirk
After Genesis, I killed him twice
Have you heard the Klingon expression
Killing three times isn't nice?

You thought that Khan was meddlesome
He's a pansy in my book
Because the best way to hurt you
That numbnuts overlooked
I'm going to let you live, Kirk
What Freudian karma you'll create!!!
And at the end of the day you'll know
There is only YOU to blame!!!

Have a whale of a time, good buddy!
Now I bid you adieu
Soon you are going to find out
That God is a bigger jerk than YOU!!!
You'll always be a victim Kirk
Creating your own grandiose plans
And you'll die like a red-shirt ensign
On some barren wasteland


Details | Free verse | |

Doggie Moss

My husband’s eyes are tearing up! Yes, it’s that time of year!
The doggie moss just keeps creeping, everywhere my dear.
Wherever does it come from? It seems to keep eluding me, for sure.
As it constantly creeps in to cover my carpet, like a fine velour.
I complain daily to my hubby, as it attacks my dogs and house.
I say, its a fine black sheen that floats in the air, through out.
My hubby doesn’t understand… He says its only hair from the shedding dogs.
But I assure him daily that it’s truly nothing of the kind, my love…
I groom the doggies, saying its to save the dogs and destroy the moss. 
Each time I explain about the moss, my hubby promptly snorts.
Then his eyes begin to twinkle as they slowly water up.
He heard me pray to God one day to help me with the moss.
He says he stumped his toe as the snort turned into a lions roar.
But when I went into the room he was doubled up, rolling on the floor.
Again his eyes were tearing as I swear I heard him trying to stifle a loud guffaw…
Then the next day he brought me home a gift, an adorable white poodle dog.
He said it’d prove it wasn’t moss and was coming from the other dogs.
I felt I had to explain, that the poor white poodle was also being struck. 
Then, I sadly showed him the black velour also adhering to it’s fluff.
He looked totally incredulous, as the tears came again, with a lively snort.
He’s way too kind as he tries not to laugh at my antics… to my face.
He would never hurt my feelings, for he thinks I believe earnestly what I say.
I don’t think he’ll ever catch on… as he tries not to tremble from his mirth.

Now, I know you may think me crazy… Though, we all are, in each our own way…
Actually, I do know it’s the dogs shedding, though that I’ll never admit or betray.
For every time he tries not to laugh, its too much fun to miss the display.

Details | Rhyme | |

Mother Earth

I was told God made this marvellous place,
for the sole benefit of the human race,
although through the years it really seems,
as if this is the figment of someone's dreams,
and maybe a lot of what I've been told,
just seems to shine,but isn't gold.
Yes, I used to ask only now and then,
but nowadays it happens,again and again,
and the questions asked all revolve,
around a problem I can't solve.
How come it took him only six days,
to make the universe, for us to amaze,
and in this time to populate too,
our world with people and the rest of the zoo?
As I know for a fact, that when my dear mother,
was making my new little baby brother,
it took her about nine months or so,
before she was able to let him go,
and he could join us in this lovely place,
a shiny new addition to the human race.
So how come God could possibly do,
something like that in a second or two?
I think I'd better buy a new book,
this really does rate a really good look!

Details | Couplet | |

Calamity the Uppity Clam-1

I found myself within a shell
Upon an oyster bed.
A wayward clam stuck out his foot
And struck me on the head.

Hit by this sea of insight
Pearls of wisdom, so to speak:
If  barnacles grow on your backside
That clam'll think you’re a geek. 

Details | Light Poetry | |

Somethings Fishy

God called on Jonah to do something he didn’t want to do. So Jonah beat a path for Tarshish to hide from you know who. But when he was on the ship God caused the sea to rise, His shipmates thought that tossing him over would probably be wise. Then God sent a fish to swallow Jonah and give him time to think, But after spending three days inside a whale Jonah began to stink. So Jonah prayed to God and promised that he’d try to do much better, He’d go give the word to Nineveh if it meant he wouldn’t get any wetter. So God made the fish puke him up somewhere near his goal, But the smell of fish innards and bile was starting to take a toll. By the time he’d walked to Nineveh the stench made Jonah sick, But the combination of the message and retching odor seemed to do the trick. Nineveh promised that they’d be better than God could ever conceive, If only Jonah would hurry to the city gate and oh dear God please leave. I guess that old saying is true, the one that people with in-laws tell, That after three days of being around, both fish and prophets smell.

Details | Light Poetry | |

Anniversary Memory

On this date I had my first spanking in the days of yore,
The first of many I received not realizing what for. 
This one was very special causing a unique frown ,
because this time they turned me upside down.
Well that should have given me a clue,
That they weren’t about to be through.

There I was hanging by  my feet,
Hungry wet and naked..
looking for something to eat..
Some dude cut a rope off my gut,
then had the nerve to spank my butt.
Yes, the first time I was spanked and didn’t know what I did..
Well that was a fine howdy do….  Welcome to earth kid!

Details | Rhyme | |

My Last Nerve

O why O why do you make me mad
take away my help that's all I had
you are not going make me sad
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve 

There is only so much that I can do
I am only one person and that is true
this is who I am and I'm not you
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve 

While I don't mind doing what needs to be done
just give me a break to relax and have fun
I'm going to take my time and not being to run
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve 

You were given many chances to correct your mistake
this is my own choice that I did have to make
all that I needed was a little bit of a break
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve 

What you are doing to me you know is insane 
so if I decide to leave I don’t want to hear you complain
I never was given any help and that's why 
it is time for me to say goodbye
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve 
That was my last nerve, That was my last nerve

Details | Rhyme | |

Old Like Me

With intention, I walk into the laundry room to get what was it now, Let’s see, looking around ~ I know it will come to me somehow. I’ll resolve this, so back to the kitchen, I carefully retrace my path, It strikes me, I need some bleach, its like solving a problem in math. Every morning I gather the newspaper and sit down to have a read, Eagerly I open the paper, now where are the reading glasses I need. After searching countertops, tables and finally deep inside my purse I find my multi-coloured magnifying glasses as I give out a quiet curse. I seem to be tired all the time but when I hit the bed I just can’t sleep, Finally I drift off after a soothing bath, sipping hot milk and counting sheep. No sooner I’m asleep when the pain becomes so intense, again I’m awake, My hip hurts, my shoulder aches ~ oh someone shoot me for pity’s sake. My conversations don’t include the word old any more because that’s me, Feeling young but according to Denny’s I am a senior, in the upper category! Caught in limbo with age, it seems somewhere between heaven and hell, Pay full price for the bus and a movie, but I can eat for less at Taco Bell. My knowledge and skills lose their relevance to my ever independent kids, Along the way we’ve switched from teacher to student, we’ve changed grids. Now retired I have time to walk and exercise but my joints limit the amount, My metabolism has really changed, seems all food has a triple caloric count. Are there benefits to being a senior, having to take drugs, I don’t condone, Maybe being able to watch my family grow and mature with lives of their own Because now, I am the storyteller, keeping the traditions of our family alive, The elder who outlines what we stand for, guiding our history as we thrive.
Written July 28, 2012 For Nancy Jones’ contest This is how life feels when you get to be my age

Details | Rhyme | |

The Red Flops

The Red Flops
Its baseball time in Boston Town
 Sure hope the team won t let us down
 Gonzales, Papi and Bobby V.
 Will surely a pennant bring.
But oh no the season came
 And all our players came up lame.
 Bailey never threw a pitch
 Followed soon by Youkilis
On the Disabled List went Jacoby
 So they brought in a guy named Cody
 needed another infield arm
 So they looked down to the farm.
No Paw Sox were ready yet
 Especially not Inglesias
 so they traded and got Avilla
 Started as a home run killer
Faded quick tho he didn t last
 So Cody picked up the slack
 Dustin fielded like an all star
 His bats power well not so far.
Papi now can hit to right
 High average and his home run might
 But poor Alex can t hit his weight
 All his hits stay inside the gates.
Still no Carl in center field
 really good 147 million dollar deal.
 No more Tek behind the plate
 A guy named Salty can t hit his weight.
Beckett, Lester and Bucholtz
 Our starting pitching aces trio.
 Have ERA's of almost seventeen
 My mother could outpitch those three.
Three cheers to the new guy Middlebrooks
 Home run power, decent looks
 Marlyn Byrd was a former Padre
 Has hit a few and earned his way.
Still the season is very young
 only 26 games are gone
 Sox only 7.5 games out.
 Still time to bring the team around.
Lets hope the Sox ownership team
 Wants to count wins and not pennies
 Bring the team talent that they need
 To win one more Beantown World Series.

Details | Verse | |

Tax Time's Here! 2008

Tax time's here.
After Christmas cheer.

Their's not much joy.
Can't eat Santa's toys.

So I'll try to get back.
What Uncle Sam calls tax.

That he used all year.
No interest! Free and clear.

H & R Block
Wants to help I see.

I'll pay a visit
With joy and glee.

Five hundred bucks
They'll give to me.

Now I'm out of debt.
Till next nears spree!

Details | Free verse | |


I am alive 
and ready to take on the day
and whatever 
may come my way

the time between the beats
with my pace
and the expression on my face

the time of day
is divided  
into twenty four hours
with many beats

how many beats 
does it take to make the bed
or take a train to work 
how many beats 
does it take to count the beats
I must count the beats some time
before it's too late

lub-dub lub-dub
lub-dub lub-dub
the heart is a variable metronome 
that does not measure time or keep time
it can only keep the beat going
and measure love

lub-dub lub-dub
lub-dub lub-dub
does nothing
does it all

Details | Rhyme | |

My Family and Me

It's amazing how quick things can change.
First your running with the kings, and then you're knocked out of range.
It's strange. I used to worry and stress over friends.
Now I've grown to be a man. Maybe know a few of them.
All that time I could of studied. Did better in school.
Got a job and made it big. Maybe now I'd be cool.
Who's the fool? Now who's the bull? I know that's not me on the top.
Life is always making turns weather you like it or not.
The past will always be the past. My glory days may seem gone.
But, now its time to start a new.The stories keep coming on.
I've got a new girl. She means the world to me.
She keeps me warm at night, my best friend, my new dream.
Since my car accident, still got a limp on one side.
Still working with my memory, still need a friend who can drive.
I love to Karaoke. I get noticed in bars.
My mom's always there to catch me. Tom's working with my mom's cars.
My sister's in the Army, my niece is a big part of my life,
Friend Zach keeps assholes off me, and God is my wife.
AJ's always there to help, Brian is my LOST bud,
Mary's out of school, Lil cousin, Hunter's a stud.
Grandpa still is my idol, JT is still the music man .
The Adam's still can party. Chris, living good on the sand.
I may only use one hand, but I plan to be the best.
At all I do in life, cause there's not that much time left.
The blood test that I took says Landon is mine.
I hope this all works out fine in time and help to make my son's life shine.
JC who's down in Georiga, my heart is screaming for you.
I hope that you recover well. It can't be worse then what I went through.
Uncle Jimmy where you at? Where's Matt, Corie, and Pete?
I know you all are doing good. Serviolo's are a hard team to beat.
How's the rest of the family? I love and miss you all!
I hope you all are standing tall and I pray we never fall.
These last words that I say, I say only to you.
We've got the best family in the world and you know I LOVE YOU!

Details | Ballad | |

bad childrens storys

humpty dumpty sat on a wall
when he knew his big butt was going to fall
why did he even get up there at all
a round guy on a tiny ledge
so he fell off and crack his head 
now humpty dumpty is just scrambled eggs

jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of ,yea right
that boy did;nt follow her just for water that night
i think he cause they had a fight
you know what it sounds like to me  
like he was just working on a strategry
another little love story ending up in tradergdy

old mother hubbard went to the cubbard to get her poor dog a bone
now why did she go there knowing her cubbards were bare 
and she didnt have  any food of her own
instead of wasting time looking on the shelf
she should let the dog go and fend for himself

but my favorite is the three little pigs
now here  a story that i can really dig 
even though the big bad wolf blew thier house down
 those little pigs still stood their ground
kinda like red riding hood did 
when that wolf tried to diguise himself
 in her grandmothers wig

 we tell these story to our kids
just like our parents and their parents did
we add our own words in from time to time 
putting a whole new view on nursery rymes
as we lose ourself in the stories we often wonder why
because we know in real life fairy tales are just a lie

Details | Rhyme | |

All Things Green

My memories of my childhood days are few and far between,
My lucky number seven and my favourite colour green.
Banality of daily life was there for mice and men,
But nothing really matters much when at the age of ten.

I loved to ride my bicycle, go swimming in the lake.
I went to birthday parties, eating jelly, ice cream, cake.
Remember loving sausages and hating cold green beans,
But food was swapped for dating  by the time I hit my teens.

By adulthood my life was marred by being mediocre,
I’d spend my time in pubs and bars, drink beer, play nine card poker.
My parents feared my devilry would not be just a blip,
My father came from Ireland so proposed I took a trip.

He said the memories that I’d have would stay with me forever.
I went. I never thought it, but my dad was very clever.
Irish whisky, Guinness, Smithwick’s, Bailey’s Irish Cream,
They tasted so divine I drank myself into a dream.
My dad no longer talks to me which isn’t very nice,
I listened to him after all and heeded his advice.
The memories that I’m laying down will always make me smile.
The legacy he left for me. The dear old Emerald Isle.                                                                             

Details | I do not know? | |

- to all- good night.

angels are sprawled 
in the longest reach my children could snow-afford on my former green lawn
over-played carols over-play the car ride to the store, where they will continue 
an embarrassment of lights dangle ‘side a staple-holed roof trim
somewhere not ‘nough off too far
there  are
yards watching snowmen come and go
behind the windows that hold kitchens
the bills are a pilin’
the car’s in the driveway needing to be plugged in
the mailman’s griping ‘bout the weight of his sack
dropping off cards he’d gladly drag back
the t.v.’s got little relief
there’s a log burning on a 24 hour channel
that someone someday will commercial 
the crap out of
office parties forum the drunk, “Here’s what I really think of you…” 
spark the  short lived, misappropriate romance
the mall cattle call. . . from parking lot to till
warrants wrappings to be hauled away
to some landfill
waiting for Valentine’s Day

Details | Rhyme | |

Sex Sells

You asked,
“Daddy, where’d I come from?” in your cute and charming way
The time was early morning ‘bout 6 bells
Confused you looked at my reply I guess you had to bat an eye
When I turned and said, “Because my dear, sex sells”.

You sat there for a moment thinking long and hard
Until a light bulb lit up overhead 
“Did you purchase mommy?”
“No” I laughed out loud and with that look upon your face
I knew an explanation further need be said

You see, about eight years ago while we were up real late
You’re mommy said “Let’s watch the Late, Late Show”
There was music from a band and a brunette finely tanned
And a skit about a giant talking taco
When the guests were interviewed the conversation turned quite lewd
And your mother said “Why don’t you get some beers”
I put on my coat and hat, grabbed my keys, hurdled the cat
and headed to the liquor store most near

Upon my arrival, I headed for the cooler
Looking for your mommy’s favorite brand
Along the way I got distracted (this part will have to be redacted)
But the blond really turned your daddy on
Then to make the matters worse I bumped into a nurse 
Who was wearing a provocative bikini
I covered up my eyes and much to my surprise
It was a cardboard ad for some no name brand martini

Now don’t misunderstand, I’m an ordinary man
And I’m as loyal as loyal can be
But just that simple trip, like the cat with her catnip
Made me really, really, really frisky 
Which just to prove my point, don’t let your nose get out of joint
There is no myth here that one can dispel
It’s now a part of life and it often causes strife
The simple fact is that its true… sells

So home I did return and found your mother on the couch
She had changed into a teddy black and red
We popped open the beer, she placed a kiss upon my ear
So I picked her up and whisked her off to bed
To your imagination the next part will be left
Save to say that we had a lot of fun
By the time that we were through we started creating you
And in less than twenty minutes we were done

Well that look upon your face says you didn’t understand
So I’ll tell you what my father told my brother
When it comes to birds and bees and making new babies
All I can say is “Go and ask your mother”
So you did that very thing and a surprise to me did bring
That makes my chest two times begin to swell
For your mother’s answer too, just like what I had said to you
It’s a simple fact of life… cells.

Details | Senryu | |

What Time Is It

spring ahead fall back
tick...tock....tick...tock ...  just ticking ...
waiting for Winter 

Gotta Just Love That White Stuff   LOL

Winter Is My Chose For Season Senryu

Details | Lyric | |

The Pawn Folly

Sand-like cliffs reaching up as towers
 thier sole purpose, but to measure hours,
 feels a though I'm stuck in a cage
 resulting in more visitations with rage;
There's not enough drink to fade it away
 and too much left to quit it, today.
 A good woman could help me put it down
 but, there doesn't seem to be any of them, around.
Gravity's pulling just as hard as she'd might
 and, the extra pull, has brought upon us, the night;
 and, just as noon can coerce the dew to fade
 night got real lucky, bartering for trade;
for day's sky and night's sky yearned for folly to be
 each dimension's signature for eternity;
 pawn folly was divided into both these domains
 giving birth to split issues, and more difficult planes.
But, on l keep trudging, as on l must go
 who'll win in the long-run, believe l'll never know,
 l've donned my best hat and, my only warm cloak
 but it's hard to realize that I'm the butt of the joke!

Details | Rhyme | |

Candy Rings

When I was five, I loved you then, 
And you said you loved me too.
A little green ring made of Haribo
Told me you were true.
When I was ten, you told me again,
With a mood ring from the store,
It had little stars and pictures of mars,
And I knew what I had before.
But we parted as we grew,
My unlucky number thirteen,
No token ring, did you bring,
No longer were you keen.
Not to me, but to someone else,
Oh such a terrible thing,
I soon found out, without a doubt,
You had given to her a ring.
Hopeless and ringless I carried on,
Until I was sweet sixteen,
Then unexpectedly you gave to me,
A Haribo ring, sweet and green.
My heart was all of a flutter,
I couldn't have loved you more,
I just couldn't wait, even if it was late,
I hoped this time was for sure.
Soon came time to graduate,
I could be seen, happy eighteen,
Hoping for a ring, a beautiful thing,
So precious with gemstones to gleam.
But when you arrived, I stood surprised,
When a pendant you asked me to wear.
I was so confused, by this peculiar news,
That all I could do was stare.
It was sad to see you leaving me,
As you packed your things and went,
But now, just as then, I surely felt,
A pendant was money poorly spent.
So here I am retelling our tales,
Tales of love and so much more.
Of candy rings and innocent things,
Of youthful promise galore.
Of course, now it is not lost on me,
That we were never to be the only fling,
Ended as soon as a girl started to dream,
Of a the sheen of a gleaming, semi-precious ring.

**For Paula's Contest**

Details | Light Poetry | |

Attack of the Giant Insects

I miss the old time monster movies where the insects ruled the day,
Where disaster resulted from a mishap with a disintegrator ray.

Unleashing the wrath of nature by causing the insects to expand,
Proving to us once again that the scientists are out of hand.

The military would be activated before they’d answered all the hows,
And the energy beam that they created made roaches the size of cows.

Then a giant deadly mantis terrorized Washington D.C. one day,
And finally taught the congressmen just how it is you prey.

Enormous hairy spiders are in the subway and on the track,
Webbing people in giant cocoons and saving them for a snack.

There was always a beautiful woman with a bod and brains to boot,
And you knew that the hero would save her with his manly chest hirsute.

Because even though he said something to her just to raise her ire,
You could tell that between the two of them there burned a raging fire.

As she works in her lab late at night the bugs come looking for their meals,
She tries to get away but she can’t run too fast while wearing her high heels.

What was there left for her to do but to freeze and start her screaming,
The hero saves her in the nick of time with a smile that was redeeming.

She’d develop a serum to reverse the horror that stares them in the face,
But he was the only one who could deliver it and save the human race.

The combination of her brains and his last ditch daring do,
Would ultimately serve to save the day and lead to kissing too.

They’d fall into each other’s arms as his tattered shirt reveals,
His blood stained bulging biceps and the love for her he feels.

And just before the credits role “The End” comes up on the screen,
Then a tiny vial falls off the lab bench and a question mark is seen.

They don’t make them like that any more but why I just can’t say,
Possibly because tastes have changed and now good taste rules the day.

Details | Prose Poetry | |


Tick tack  on the wall,
Knocking all the wall,
Scaring us all,
Muscling the muscles,
Muscling the morsels in us,
Quickening the finest deep,
The hidden gold of gold,
A dignity of labour,
How loyal and diligent you are,
Precious and precarious,
Dangerous and conspicuous.

Running without waiting for anybody,
How impatient could man be,
In your sound you keep man,
In haste at everydawn,
Thou hath in the haste of full dawn,
Desperately desperate,
Anxiously anxious,
Wisely wise are we and you
Preciously precious,
Nothing can be done without you that's obivously obvious.

We chose to choose you,
Working to work with you,
Falling to fall with you,
No time no food,
No time no suite,
No time no cheat,
No time no shift,
No time no me,
there is set time for everything,
Mama use to say,
Patience is virtue of time,
that's the way whichever way.

Details | Haiku | |

Monday Morning

With a single breath
a smile the planets aligned
for Monday morning

Details | Quatrain | |


Four people were walking at four fourty four
Faith Fullen at aft and Phil Fallon at fore
Then Fallon moved aftward and Fullen went fore
Till fullen was first and Phil Fallon was four

~For the Four, For, Fore contest~

Details | Rhyme | |

Death Came A Knocking While I Was Out

Death came a knocking while I was out
He did not have time for me to be about
Up at five before the sun
Picking up what I left undone
Coffee black cup after cup
Trying to get my body woke up
Do a load of laundry and fry some eggs
Do a load of dishes wake up the kids
Feed them, cloth them solve every crisis extra soon
Off to the school bus jumping over the moon
Let the dog out, put the cat in
Finish to start, end to begin
Wash my face, comb my hair
Put on anything that is near
Rushing out, racing the car
Just an errand here, on time so far
Dry cleaning, day care, drug store
No time for just one more
Clock in at work meeting at nine
Forget lunch who has the time
In basket full, out basket bare
Check an e-mail if you dare
Finally work is done
You clock out on the run
Get bread and milk and sneak a candy bar
The kids are home and they need the car
Soccer, baseball, dancing and the flute
All these activities cost me loot
Hardly time to eat dinner at eight
Home work, baths than a minute to escape
The cat gets out the dog wants in
You're looking in the cupboard for that bottle of gin
Finally a moment of peace
Everybody exhausted and asleep
You forgot Junior's cupcakes off to Wal-Mart
Better gas up saving time to be smart
On the way home a ring on the cell phone
Quick trip to the airport I moan
Spouse trip cancel needs ride
It is okay you will survive
Finally in the drive way and who do you see
Shaking his head as he leaves
Death walking by, he finally gave up
He murmured about a schedule and life's a nut
So as I lay down to rest
My love's hand upon my chest
I hear the crying of a child
The boogie man awoken him in dreams wild
I sometimes wonder if it would bother me
If Death would come back and fetch me
But the note he left upon my door
My soul is mine till I'm ninety-four
He did not have time for me to be about
Death came a knocking while I was out

Details | Lyric | |

i apologize to you


It has been a while
Since the last time we talk
We pass by like winds
Never giving each other smile
I know you're mad
That's not new to me
Can't turn back the hands of time
And it really makes me sad
It's never my intention
Of hurting you like that
It just happened...
Now, I lost your attention
Here's just one thing for you to know
It's hard for me to say sorry
I can't find it in my vocabulary
It's my pride which I follow
And as time passes by
It makes me realize
Is this going to be forever?
Is this really goodbye?
Courage is all I need
For me to say those words
Words hard to let go
Words where friendship could lead

Details | Rhyme | |

Window to the Future

There was a time
I can attest
A window to the future

Joy was there 
As many others
Happiness came as her tutor

As we jumped 
In and out
Our hearts all a flutter 

What did we find
But the trappings of time
We had landed betwixt each other

Details | Blank verse | |





Details | Bio | |

Ischchaduta II


This is a new word in the name of the Infamous Pinkee....I still say that it should be
added to the British and/or American Dictionary!  There is an ongoing campaign to 
implement this change fore it is detrimental to the survival of the total alphabet system.
This, I do in the name of the Pinkster....The only problem with this word is that it's spelling
seem's to change every time that it is used, according to the setence structure. I bet that 
Scholars' will fight over this for years.....

Ischchaduta (ish-chc-duta)

Ishchehaduta do what you want
I can ish-chu-data
The way that I feel
I can isch-cu-duta
When I finally need a break
Or climbing up a hill
That's that old isch-ca-dut-a
Some-time's it could kill
I can isch-chu-du-a
When I'm eating a steak
I can even isch-cu-duta
When it is all just a big mistake
That's the chance we take
I can ischcu-duat
When I say that I love you
When I am alone and feel blue
I truly isch-ca-duta-doo
Especially for you
I can isch-cu-duta
When I am talking on
        The phone
This is the making of
When I just want to play
           All alone
I do seem to isch-ul-ax
When I just want to relax
I isch-cc- to the max
When it is time to pay
The "ISR" their tax'
I ischu-duta-day
In such a seriou's way
As a fact of the matter
I wish that I could Is-cha-duta
         Again to day
Only this time that I ish-co-duta
It won't be for play


Details | Dramatic monologue | |


....simply beautiful... it is of beauty to simply write such love letters of poetry, letters joining hands within a sky of words setting a background, upon the "Sea", setting sail.. within a wordsong, as playing winds, just swirl around beautifully of air, that blows a kiss to an angeled choir to sing in perfect key, life, the spice, the scented beauty of a rose in full bloom, the scented beauty of a heart beat, beating in time, with rhyme being so kind hearted and true blue of the deep.

Details | Cinquain | |

It's Tax Time Cinquain

                                                       financial charge
                                                      direct or indirect
                                                exacted by our legislate

Details | Narrative | |


My aunty Gerty Gribble was a true blue pioneer 
as she and husband Harold ran a place called 'Bendemere'. 
Two dinkum Aussie battlers, who had given their life's blood 
to fifty years of toiling on their outback cattle stud. 
So constant had the struggle been that Gert would often quote, 
she'd worked her tiny butt off just to keep the place afloat. 
The hours were so demanding she had no time for romance  
and motherhood had passed her by, she never got the chance. 
Old Gert was old and wrinkled when they gave the game away, 
though fit as any Mallee bull and jogged ten k a day. 
They bought a little donga in a Queensland coastal town, 
but sadly, being childless often got old Gerty down. 
She knew that her poor Harold was beyond it, without doubt, 
so Gert would try a new technique that she had read about.   
"You're far too old for IVF," the Doctor kindly said, 
but Gert was not to be put off, she forged on right ahead.  
"It happens that my Harold has been looking to donate  
a hundred thousand dollars to a worthy cause of late. 
However if you cannot help".  "You'll make a lovely Mum 
I'm sure ... so may I ask would next week be to burdensome?" 
Aunt Gert she fell first time it seems and had a little boy, 
which left her Harold overwhelmed and Gerty filled with joy. 
This news then spread like fowl manure and folk were left enthralled, 
The Premier and local Mayor among the first who called. 
One day while I was driving past I thought I'd duck in too 
and see my little cousin ... sort of pop in out the blue. 
Aunt Gert was glad to see me, but she asked if I could wait  
until he woke from sleeping, though did not elaborate.  

Within the hour to my surprise ten other folk called by 
and aunty Gert told them the same and I was dumbstruck why. 
We sat and dunked our biscuits in the tea she'd kindly made 
while Gert was scratching her old head and looked somewhat dismayed. 
The Doctor from the clinic, who'd been playing basketball, 
had wondered how Gert's baby was and thought he'd make a call. 
"It's nice your dropping in" she said, "but Doctor would you mind 
just waiting till the baby wakes - I'm in a  kind of bind." 
"A problem Gert?" the Doctor said, "There something I can do?" 
"Not really Doc.  He's sound asleep,  these folk are waiting too. 
I'd show you him asleep and all, if that is what you'd like,  
but Doc, I can't recall just where I put the little tyke."

Details | Free verse | |

"I am a Laid Back Fact"

In my eighteen wheeler rolling, I am like a salmon fish in the rapids shoaling! Spawn’s flowing 
next generation’s showing!  Black smoke a rolling from smoke stack.

I am laid back, I don’t snort crack, I take time to stop and get some java black, and  hit 
sleeper sack! I don’t let my mind get out of whack!

Even my cb handle  is, ‘Laid Back’, I acquired the name way back, in driving school, I live 
good life  jack!

“Laid Back”, my cb handle on the radio, and my 460 Cummins an’t slow, she’ll blow and go, 
she climbs Cabbage mountain in a snow, “good buddy, come back!”

I hear drama queen, playing her scene, on cb radio, her sultry voice saying, “I am Back!”

Inviting me to stop at a TA travel stop, telling me what all kind of food they got, I tell her I 
am already late, can’t stop!” Been there, done that, all they got is slop!

Again I hear drama queen, cussing a stream, saying, "you’re the lying-est  S.O.B. I’ve ever 
seen." But I am not mean, I just don’t make this type scene. 

I pull over on shoulder to miss lost tire tread called an alligator, as a 40 pound possum, runs 
under my trailer, meeting his alter meta.

A beautiful dream, the trucker scene, all the world I mean! I’ve not been mean, I am laid 
back. And I don’t let my mind get off track! Don’t smoke dope! Don’t get on that slope! 

I am laid back! I stay on track! I am Love, I live, that’s  what I give. So if you want to live, 
Love is what you give.
To live laid back, you must stay on track. And out of drama queen’s sack. For she has that 
knack, to draw you back, into a life of your mind that’s cracked, a life minus Agape fact.

It’s time for humanity to pull over and rest, from a mind of fest. This trucker wishes you all 
the best, be Love’s guest. For of a mind of fest, your life can become a mess. Be laid back, 
keep your mind on a reality of Love’s fact! I am drew back ,“I am Laid Back!”

Placed #4

Details | Concrete | |


No comment!

               by GF

Details | Rhyme | |

Why Things Happen

My mama always told me
I should follow a Holy path
For if I ever veered off course
I’d face God’s mighty wrath

God works in mysterious ways
I know this to be true
If you read my words below
I know you’ll believe it too

One day when I was six
To my mom I did talk back
God came in disguised as Dad
And gave my bottom such a smack

Another time when I was nine
I skipped my nightly prayer
That night I dreamt of monsters
God gave me such a scare

One time I stole some candy
God’s rage I did spawn
For when I got home that day
My brand new bike was gone

It was just a few years later
When caught I told a lie
Rains poured down from heaven
Mom said I made God cry

Even as an grown up woman
I’ll sometimes make a blunder
Then I cringe and hold on tight
While waiting for God’s thunder

Have you ever been in a hurry
And every light turned red
Have you ever stood beneath a tree
And had a bird poop on your head

Have you ever went to water your lawn
And found a hole  in your hose
Or had a very special date
And gotten a pimple on your nose

Now you may think it’s just bad luck
When things don’t go as planned
Truth is, you’ve been scolded
By God’s almighty hand

Details | Couplet | |



Russel Crowe  in metal armor clothing needs sequel  to GLADIATOR  
Schwartzenegger, the all-metal guy, needs sequel  to TERMINATOR

Both could be dressed entirely  in clothing of metal  
And act tough, giving off a lot of hot air to show their mettle,  

From time to time letting off steam.
Both these guys could make a good team

In their  ultimate sequel  movie  -  RADIATOR.

Details | Quatrain | |

Silly Facts 2

It would take more than 150 years
To drive your car to the sun
At the price of gas you'd need two jobs
A cashier at Walmart could be one

A law on the books in Kentucky states
You must bathe at least once a year
Next time I'm heading down Florida way
It's a state I'll avoid going near

The actual energy of everyone's farts
Immediately upon time of emission
Creates an extremely powerful force
Enough to launch a lunar expedition

Truman Capote's strange middle name
Believe it or not, was Streckfus
His parents shoulda done time in prison
Without dinner, lunch and breakfast

It's said, to have your picture taken
By the first camera ever made
You'd have to sit still for eight long hours
I'd wet my pants I'm afraid

Some of the water that all of us drink
Has at one time already been drunk
By someone else at least once before
Eeew, wish that was a lotta bunk

You would think everybody's eye lids
Would need replacing clearly
Blinking four billion times in a lifetime
Decided to change mine yearly

They say it's impossible to kill yourself
By holding your b-r-e-a-t-h ........

© Jack Ellison 2012

Details | Rhyme | |

A Letter To Miss Sandman

Can't sleep.
 can't eat.
  write words.
     until I fall

Details | Free verse | |

Moulting - for you

the next is like the first
equally shedding more skin
you do that again and again 
and I known each time 
you look at me 
we are transformed

and so we take each step
each page is torn away
a day, a week, a month
eternity in our eyes

this time with you 
like a wave that never breaks
a swell in the heart of the ocean

where the two race, play, swim

we are
the ones we see

in the next moment the sun rolls by
you lighten up the room
again a mirror 

to the little pools of mystery 
spilling out around you
giving up the secret

moulting in the broad day light

Details | Rhyme royal | |

The Saint Is In The House

Their was a clammer
   On the chimney
Movement about, 
I couldn't believe it
Some-one just knocked
         Santa out
Old Saint Nick was out
       Like a light
So, as to say
Merry Christmas to all
And to all good night
The burglars' were hood's
Santa hung out carrying a bag
      Poor Saint Nick
They took everything He had
      No tinny tinney reindeer
        No toy's for the kid's
And they took his wallet
       They also took his
 What you ma call it
   O'h, yes they did
They also took one
Of his tinny reindeer
  Rudolph did hide
He hide some where inside
He didn't have his money
But he still had his pride'
He did know that it was 
So, he did had to slide
Their were so many children
Those poor little soul's
They could not be denied
If not for the sake of anything'
He will just have to see you outside
We wish you a Merry Christmas
And a Awsome Fourth of July
Because that is what it will be
The next time that those
            Hoods' come by
And all the little children
They shouldn't have to cry
The next time I see them
They will get pepper in their eye
I am sorry I lost those toy's
They were all that we had
What else can go wrong
And it is kind of sad
But that is what happens
When Santa goe's bad
Santa was had and mad



The following weekend their was a add in the paper for one tinney Reindeer.....

Another add said: Reinder for ransome; Santa need not answer.....

Details | Prose Poetry | |


Perhaps on hind sight they may decide to add more time they may fix the presets to make them open they may even be more user friendly but they missed it for the first time around how can you pretend to knoeledge when you hoard it when you keep it from the whole crowd and dish it out with the silver spoon as pablum carping in a stream. Refusing to be sane and safe you LORD it over otheres no Lord no power in your hand but the gang like backing of the others of your kind insisting on rules that neither help or edify the group you seem intent on making a world of non believers full of sin and queerness restricted in the use of all equipment not needing more than querulous food fed inthevieniously overhead of all the smarter ones never will agree this is exactly what it look likes this attempt at poetry is a poor ensample of a poor example of a poor man attempting poetry. In other word the man attempting to convey to the reader a poor understanding.

Details | Light Poetry | |

So you can Burp Out Loud

I wrote a silly little poem about nothing very deep, 
It was only meant to make you laugh and certainly never weep. 

So I posted it on the poetry site for everyone else to read, 
I could have hoped for a better placement, this I will concede. 

The poem right after mine was titled, “That’s Why Christ Died on the Cross,” 
It detailed at some length how we have benefited by His sacrificial loss. 

The poem right before mine was called, “It’s the Reason Why We Love,” 
Which became a distraction when my poem’s title came after it and above. 

I had written a ditty about the time that I taught you how to swallow air, 
Remember you said that you wanted to burp any time you’d care? 

I titled my poem appropriately and it made me oh so proud, 
You see that’s why I entitled it, “So You Can Burp Out Loud.” 

But now when you read the list your eye catches something in the crowd, 
“That’s Why Christ Died on the Cross,” “So You Can Burp Out Loud.” 

It’s just as bad as when my poem is the one that’s up above, 
“So You Can Burp Out Loud,” “It’s the Reason Why We Love.” 

The more I think about it the second one’s too close to be ignored, 
For the first one, however, I’ll need to offer up my apologies to the Lord.

Details | Quatrain | |

A Toast for New Years Eve

Whilst I lay in my bed, 
And reflect on my past
I remember that I want, 
Certain moments to last.
Like this evening tonight;
On New Years Eve;
We’re having too much fun
With much more to achieve!

For the New Year, is here!
And let it be said
’08 is now gone,
It is totally dead!

So we lift up our glasses!
Way high in the sky!
We’re not going to remember this,
Let’s not even try!

Don’t take a drink!
It’s not yet that time!
You have to let me finish
My cute little rhyme!

Now cheers to our friends,
Both new and old!
Let’s cheers to the stories 
That have yet to be told!

Let’s cheers to the nights 
That we stayed out late
Let’s cheers to you!
For being so wonderful, 
And being so great!

Happy New Year!

Details | Blank verse | |


Old people and children are to blame for our overpopulation, yet the land where 
I live, is empty everyone has gone to live in a city fleeing poverty hoping to find 
work, now they are worse off than before. A sudden blackout, I sat in darkness
 couldn’t even see my hands. Staggered around till I found a flashlight, lit candles 
I had in the kitchen; back at the time when people rose at first light and went to 
bed early and stories were told by the old by the fireside .Only priests could read 
and we believed in their gospel truths and they held the evil power of knowledge.
 Now cities are lit up like Christmas, no corners are dark and it easier to believe in 
neon light rather than god. We are urbane and laugh in the face of gloom and call 
it Halloween. There was a time when people were old at forty and many children 
died in infancy. Electricity is back, but we mustn’t forget if we do not take care we 
can easily be thrown into to a world of cruelty where only those between the age
of twenty and sixty have the right to eat, and babies are hidden in basements to
avoid detection have their vocal cord cut. The old have facelift in frantic attempt 
to look fifty four, to avoid being gassed, at places called: “Friends of the seniors” 
and “Heavenly Peace.”  And silent children, survivors of our selfish madness, shall
 inherit our world and learn to whistle as new way of communication.  

Details | Rhyme | |

A Letter Not So Better

Once I wanted to impress a female friend So I thought about a letter I should send Then I sat down writing and writing In my mind my thoughts were fighting and fighting The ideas that came to me were not maintained Due to nervousness, my brain had drained Finally I got an idea , you might that I’m nuts Because it was a consumer product That’s how the starting was like- Because of this don’t get embarrass And I have no intention of you to harass I might seem to you as a fool Don’t mind because I just want to play it cool At this stage I feel like Nike (Just Do It) But I’m so nervous right now That it seems to me like a mountain hike Whenever I see you, I think my life’s L.G. (Life’s Good) But when I don’t see you, I feel like world’s ugly Just give me a chance and I’ll prove you that I’m like Del Monte (YouAin’t Had Nothing like This Before) If I don’t come up to your expectations I’ll go away At this time you must be like Coca Cola (Enjoy Happiness) And I’m singing ooh laa laa ooh laa laa Just take into your consideration my letter I know you will make the decision better I don’t care whether you like me or not But for you with my fears I’ve fought So just sit down and laugh At this letter “not so better” By the time I’ll go and study for my exams Simultaneously checking my virtual farms

Details | Rhyme | |

The Railway Crossing

The Van-Boy got out to open the gate still in his head last night’s date
He did not notice the green signal light a train was coming though not in sight
This crossing was notorious and set at an angle getting some drivers in a tangle
But this was not on the van-boys mind when the driver he waved to come behind
The lorry driver thinking it was safe engaged first gear and let off the brake
Up the incline he had come no chance to go back now the journey begun
A careful driver all his life he knew that this dangerous crossing had taken a few
He looked down the line and to his dismay saw the Train coming quickly his way
Nothing to do now must hit the gas and take the consequences be it his last
The lorry sped over the lines so quick the bottles and crates rattling and the driver 
But luck would be upon his side and the lord above was to be his guide
With the memento of the weight no time to straighten through the gate
The lorries breaks were not enough to stop this speeding it was tough
The poor old fence post standing for years if it could cry it would be in tears
Out from the ground with a tearing sound the lorries front bumper tore it round 
Well when the driver drew his breath and realized how close he came to death
What would have happened to his family if the worst had happened where would 
they be
I hope that Van-boy will never forget his stupid mistake nearly caused an accident
But I am sure he can remember too the words the driver shouted as the air 
turned Blue
Train Crossings are lethal so take your time and wait for the proper signal  to 
cross the line

Details | Limerick | |


The clock is rapidly ticking, ready to subtract
another year; is it a possible threat?
Once a traveler told me I could buy time,
but it would cost me more than a gold mine...
and he swore by the thick blood in his powerful wrist! 

Written by Andrew Crisci
for Linda-Marie's contest,
" February Funny Bone..."

Details | Rhyme | |

Santas Little Helpers-part1

'Twas the Night before Christmas and I must confess,
the year 1987, started out just like all of the rest,
with christmas lights twinkling from everyone's dwelling,
but believe me it was different and far more compelling!'

'I'm Sarah, a reporter, who's delivering this tale,
from Chris' own journal this story's regaled,
'I was down in his cellar to take a quick look,
when high up on a shelf was a thin little book!'

'It was dusty and I coughed as I turned the first page,
written in Santas' own words now yellowed with age.'
'December 20th, three of my deer have the flu,
mere days before Christmas-Whatever will I do?'

Just think of it friends-All those poor girls and boys,
searching for that gift from Santa or that special toy!
'Maybe it is a doll, some baseball cards or a game,
with faces abeam, they clutch their gift, yelling 'Oh, it came!'

Reading on, I sympathized with Chris' own plight,
only a few reindeer to pull the heavy sled through the night!
Santa wrote, 'I thought to ask God for an angel or two,
then realized, they were probably too busy with all that they do!'

'For they surely were busy, helping those left alone,
and directing others to shelters, when they had no home,
but the hardest of all, to which I have cried,
is when they comfort the family-at a teen's suicide!'

'I am still in great awe, at God's fabulous gift to me,
the power to reach children and leave a gift under the tree!'
'So I'll fly through the night with only five deer,
and somehow make my deliveries as I do every year!'

'I'll use a shorter harness and reposition the deer instead,
with the strongest in front to balance my heavy sled.'
The pack of toys in the center and I in my seat,
and I'll place one in the lead with the nimblest of feet!'

- Well it's Christmas Eve and so far nothing's gone wrong,
half the world's now visited, the gifts where they belong,
but my reindeer are more tired each time I sneak a glance
and now's no time to rest as we are heading through central France.

'Suddenly our speed begins to drop while flying through space,
the sleigh starts to sway, as my leader's hip slips out of place,
desperately I pull up on the other reindeers' tethers,
but we are fallin' too fast, through the cold foggy weather!'

'Looming ahead, I barely saw the darkened castle,
manouvering toward it, proved to be more than a hassle!'
'We hit the turret wall, up and over we dropped,
and bouncing, skidding and braking we finally came to a stop...'

Details | ABC | |


Mark and Micheal,
were identical twins,
who would confuse,
every one in the world,
who do not know them.

One time came,
Mark bought a boat
that knocked the same day,
Micheal's mum died.

A few days later,
a funny old lady,
short and small,
mistaking him for his brother.

She said i'm sorry to hear
about your loss,
you must  feel  it terrible",
Mark, thinking that she
was meaning his boat.

He replied a big no,
really i'm glad to be rid of her,
she was a rotten old thing,
directly from the start.

Her engine was all shrivelled,
and smelled like a seven days 
dead dog!
she was always losing 
her  water and had a big
crack in the back,
even a pretty big hole in the front.

Every time i used her,
her hole becomes big,
and she leaked like crazy.

Finally i guessed,
what finished her when i rented
her the five big guys,
looking for a good time.

I warned them all,
she wasn't very good,
but all the fools tried to get
in her ! she split right up
the middle",
The old lady fainted.

Details | Free verse | |

Brutus the Mule Don't flank it pt1

                                  Brutus was always bad
                      But what can you expect from a liasion
                      When Molly the mare, met  the Jackass
                                        Brutus's dad?
                           Well here is the story about Brutus
                            Its a Mule, son of Molly and Rufus
                            Molly was a comely mare you see
                    Rufus looked like a Jackass in every degree
                           They didn't share any love or hate 
                But what brought them together was a twist of fate
                         My uncle wanted a worker you see
                      Something relentless, strong and mighty
                        To climb the valley, hills and the glen
                In this capacity ,the mule was man's best friend
                 So a date was set for Rufus and Molly to meet
          Out of the prying eyes of children to accomplish the feat
                           After Brutus trysts and dirty deed
                           Molly grew fat from Brutus's seed
                       Nine months later at the break of dawn
                        We had Brutus, Molly's craggy spawn
                          Now just after about a year had gone
                          Brutus grew sturdy and also strong
                          He looked  more like a horse you see
                            An equine specimen we'll all agree
                             It was time for Brutus's schooling
                               In simple stages was the plan
                         Uncle Poppy, to be the leading Hand
                The plan was hatched and the scene was staged 
                        To gradually induce Brutus to his trade
                    We decided when Brutus was watered and fed
               Uncle Poppy would mount his back and straddle his leg
                        Brutus didn't flinch nor did he complain
                         Haughtily Uncle Poppy patted Brutus's mane
                        Time after time he would sit on his back
                        Brutus stood still, but never moved a jot.
                      But composed and agreeable was our take
                         Then further progress we ought to make.

Pt 1

Details | Rhyme | |

Every dog has it's day

there once was a boy who lived in a little town 
where he was considered one of the toughest around
 it was not that he wanted to bully for fear 
he was forced to live up to the reputation of his peers
 deep in his heart he knew it wasnt right 
but for some reason he was always forced into a fight 
even though he wanted too it was too late for change 
he had to live live up to the family name
 and it was never cause by the things he did 
it was always because he was so and so's kid
 his little brothers was'nt as tough as him 
so he had to always take up for them
 a friendly kid pushed into rage 
by being force in to fight guys sometimes twice his age
 arguing he didnt chance the risk 
he always settled all disbutes with his fisk 
he was such a person no one could perdict
 some would say he spoke softly but carried a big stick 
others would say he has a good heart but just a mean streek
 however he was not one to be considered weak
 until this one fight that he was sure not to lose 
where he ended up with both eyes black and blue
 and with a pain he'd never experince before
 he knew at that moment that he did not want more
 seems the first time in his life someone had pulled his card 
cause he was taken punches that was pretty darn hard 
so for the first time in his life he just turned a ran away 
he figured better there he go than there he lay


Details | Free verse | |

What Would They Say

There is no one left for explain-tion…
They are all gone,
The violent end has come…
Revving up since realization,
Of the abstract. 


Hope. Another one-
Love, yet another-
Space well there’s a fact.

So how do we…decide?
On the dot of midnight demised.

Quasar, no, galaxy 
Red-blue. Maybe the work of a gypsy. 

AGGressive-ly  dealt with-
In order to paint wilted whispers.

Van Gogh would be proud!
Of this wonder we allowed to be unplowed-

Ab st ract. Abst raction.

Details | Rhyme | |

Noisy Clock

My clock is ticking on the wall
Keeping me awake
It seems it doesn't care at all
That it's getting rather late

Tick Tock!
Tick Tock!
Coming from the clock

I may just have to take my clock
And throw it off the dock!

Details | Quatrain | |


Time is such an illusion,
though we deal with it each day.
But each of us must deal with
time in very different ways.

Some people try to buy time,
and some don't have enough.
Some people have so little time,
and some have way too much.

Some are asked to give the time,
while other have to take it.
Some will have to save some time,
and some find ways to make it.

Sometimes we see time dragging,
sometimes we watch it fly.
Sometimes we try to beat the time,
sometimes it passes by.

Yes time is just an illusion,
and it changes every day.
And each of us will notice
time, in very different ways.

Details | Verse | |


Joanna Davis

Bulging bags, a half eaten bun
Scribbled postcards penned on the run
Victoria station, just two stops away
From the end of another short holiday
Summers over, time to return 
To cooking and cleaning, the list goes on and on
Souvenirs a plenty; a mug of the queen
Galleries and gardens, no sight left unseen
Last hugs and kisses, watering eyes
No time for tears, or long goodbyes
Days we’ll long remember, You and I
Funny how quickly, the time’s flown by
I’ll write you; I promise, a letter each day
Until it’s your turn to come over, and stay

Details | I do not know? | |

Four Shining Stars (Dedicated to The Blue Collar Workers)

There are many places in this world
where people tend to go,
to get a really good laugh
from a Great Comedy Show.

But My Friends I say to You
The Place to go is this,
Where you will hear The Famous Line,
"You Might be A Redneck If......."

Next on Stage there comes A Man,
and He Say's "Here's Your Sign",
He makes us laugh time and again,
He simply is Divine.

Then next We ROAR with laughter
From This Line, "GIT - R - DONE",
This Man is simply wonderful,
His Smile's Bright as The Sun.

Up Next there is a Gentleman
that fills Our Hearts with Glee,
He Says, "That Judge just TICKED ME OFF!!!
I was in the bar you see."

These four men are wonderful,
they ALL shine just like the sun,
they fill our homes with happiness,
with laughter and with fun.

And so My Friends I say to you
the next time you feel blue,
Just Think of these Four Shining Stars,
They'll bring A Smile to You.

Details | Rhyme | |

Hey, that's my pickle!

(This is a fictional poem)

This time that dirty jerk went too far.
He got the last pickle out of the jar..
He deserved to pay for taking my pickle.
I'm going to have to learn to be less fickle.
I invited that lousy jerk outside.
He beat me so hard that I cried.
He kept hitting my torso until one of my kidneys wound up in my pocket.
When it comes to my big mouth, I'm going to have to learn how to lock it.
I got the hell beat out of me over something that's worth a nickel.
Next time I'll keep my mouth shut when somebody takes my pickle.

Details | Rhyme | |

Our politicians

Our Politicians
They speak like politicians
And hold a great ambition.
They think they are right
And same speech they recite.
They always gather for a bite
Deciding who should start the fight.
All have their own stations
To be the victims of cremation.
They gather their own crowd
Who cheer and clap to any sound.
They think they are right
Only here for a bite.
They speak like Aristo
And act like Montecristo!
They smoke big cigars
And all drive tinted cars.
They dress in glitter
And all have Twitter.
They act so polite
But hardly can write.
Always in action
Only during the election.
To make a collection
Or a connection.
O What a time you feel like 
Committing a crime.

For a brief background about this poem, pls, read the poem (Beirut).

Details | Free verse | |

A kid of cunning

They call me cunning but Im only a kid
They call me stunning want to take a bid
I might gamble I might cheat
Lets just skip that beat
I've already confess 
My one true purpose
That to gain not give
For I want to live
Slated as a outlaw 
Accused as a thief
Why do i bear all this grief
Ha Ha many laugh but they are not true
Accused themselves and all there old world crew

Details | Free verse | |

The Haiku Corral - Part 1

Haiku Alley

five and dime
jes' lookin' aroun'
give me dime
give me five
and I'll give ya' dime to take yo' time
that's givin' ya' zen in change

there ain't no rhyme
in the zen of five and dime
and time lives only
in the jail of yo' darkest dreams
beyond the dark, beyond the light
lookin' aroun'
five and dime
give me five and I'll take yo' time
that's zen in change

stick some pins in your voodoo doll
hurtin' so good
servin' a sentence of five and dime
lost in the bliss of time unknown
lost between the bars
of your liquid voodoo jail
of stinking five and dime
coolin' the demons
dime and five
give me dime
and I'll give you five to take your time
that's voodoo zen in change

lookin' aroun'
rollin' ovah
an' posing dead
playin' live
'cause there's everythin'
for your virgin hootenanny voodoo doll to feel
not much to see
in the haiku alley
behind your jail
jes' the parkin' lot of prayer
and down on yo' knees
screamin' for somethin'
don't know what
maybe a piece
from yo' virgin voodoo doll
without them pins
but alive with the pain
of not dyin' before its dime
to give the reaper five
lookin' aroun'
lookin' aroun'
rollin' ovah
rollin' ovah ovah' bein' hea' (here)
five and dime
dime and five
give me dime
give me five
and I'll take yo' dime
give ya' time...
... that's givin' ya' voodoo change in zen!

Details | Free verse | |

Halloween Folly

I’m a stodgy old lady with suddenly too much time on her hands.
I was always too work worn to make big Halloween plans...

But as I walked thru Walgreen’s to get my latest meds…
I came up the isle to the You Know- Hoo Hoo of a 2 story black cat, instead.
I ‘d have a silly grin on my face too, with a $49.95 sticker so delicately placed.
As I looked around his You Know Hoo- Hoo…
There was a fan in his foot, breathing life to every corner and nook.
With air going in… where was it going out?
I vote for a whistle in that You Know Hoo Hoo spot.
But fun aside… I decided I could have fun too. So I bought the dang thing.
Finally I got him in place after working my support hose as far as they would go.
Lord have mercy on me… maybe I shouldn’t have took that last med, you see…
For I began to suddenly see possibilities…
I securely anchored his back feet to the ground. 
Then got a small fan to blow on his belly, so he’d rear up on command when the Kids came around. 
I put a bell on its neck to draw their attention right there.
Then I went back and bought 2 white ghosts with pennies to spare.
I set up one to ride on his great big black back.
The other I put in his mouth and ran a string to a post for another effect.
When the kids scream, as surely they will… a ghost will climb out of his mouth
To the post residing there. I could see it flying so bravely and true.
This was amazing I said, as I had a laugh or two.
But that wasn’t enough… It seems I’d had another two med’s.
So I bought a crystal skull with a candle to glow in my lamp on top of the poll.
And got a witchy costume where I’d let my white hair flow.

Then with another med I found a cauldron with dry ice so perfectly placed.
I dreamed up some glowing mushrooms for a ring in my yard to draw the kids in.
Inside the ring was a pumpkin that was cut par excellence. 
A neighbor had made it for me with a fairy on top.
Now instead of a stodgy old bat, they brought their chairs about.
Every night after dinner they came to see what silliness next I would place.
They see me as someone with too much time on her hands, in fact.
I do have a great story and a poem to write this night.
My meds may be dwindling, but it was a hoot and I practiced a rusty old laugh.
And two more neighboring witches came over to help keep the kids in check.
Then two teenage ghouls came by with guitars and a musical score.
Next year beware, I’ll be back at it again, in fact, I’ll do more.
Contest: Holliday Hearth: CSEastman

Details | Concrete | |

Once I was a Carpenter

was just
a carpenter
and all I built was
step ladders, or stairs.
I was on my way to the top.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Alarm

Last night I set my alarm
It worked just like a charm
Couldn’t sleep waiting for it to sound
Every noise in the house would abound

There’s the water dripping from the tap
Hear it bouncing pit a pit pat
There’s floor boards on the landing they do creak
Getting tired now really feeling weak

There’s the children coming in late
Just heard the crashing of the gate
There’s the wife she’s snoring next to me
I put in my Earplugs, yet clearer it can’t be

There’s the sun the cockerel he is crowing
There’s the alarm the sound it is mind blowing
Wish I had never turned it on
I’ve had no sleep now the time has gone

Strike the alarm turn it off I have snooze
My eyelids close and soon I start to cruise
Into sleep from which I don’t want to wake
Something wakes me please give me break

Morning should be a pleasurable time
You should be happy and sublime
You should have had a proper night’s sleep
It should have been so dreamy and deep

If it wasn’t for the alarm I know
I‘d sleep so well when off to bed I go
Why do I set it I wake up anyway?
Same time every single day

Details | Free verse | |

I Learn And Study English

- Let’s start from the very beginning!
- Ok, I know, it’s a very good place to start.
- If you want to know how to read
you have to learn the alphabet.
As far as we are not in a race
you can face 26 letters in one phrase.
“The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog”.
Now a dialogue.
You’ll see how new words appear,
I hope everything will be clear.
For example: to admire–admiration,
to inspire–inspiration. Now you, please!
And be at your ease!
- To desire–desiration.
- Oops! My voice whoops!
When you study English
you have to distinguish:
one goose but many geese.
-What about a moose?
Are they meese?
- A lone mouse can transform into…
a whole set of mice,
but it’s impossible for a single house
to become a whole block of hice.
-Ok, a house–houses.
Why not a mouse–mouses?
-A tooth but teeth, a foot but feet.
If I speak of a foot
and you show me your feet.
-And if I give you a boot
would a pair be called beet?
Can I say a root 
and in plural form reet?
-Let’s make this question complete!
There are a lot of exceptions
in the language of British nations.
Anyway, the rules are the tools
for learning the language
and together with the exceptions
it's something like a sandwich.
Let’s go on!- said my teacher with a yawn.
A lot of time has already gone,
I am not going to stay here until the dawn.
 Let’s take an easy word “ball”!
- Yes, I like to play football.
- Good! Now open the ball!
- What do you mean by that?
I am not a rat so that to cut the ball.
It’s not funny at all.
- You are kidding!
- Oh, no! I am not a kid!
I would like to know where the meaning of that “ball” lead.
- Ok, in that phrase “ball” has the meaning of a party,
but… a bit more arty.
- There are a lot of other English words I can’t understand.
Why do they call all men gentlemen?
Are they all gentle?
This word looks so fundamental.
If a man is rude can I say a rudeman?
I wouldn’t like to look like a clown
That’s why I ask you again:
Will the difference remain
if I say: shut up or shut down?
I would also like to know:
If we say  a teacher taught
why can’t we say: a preacher praught?
If people from Poland are called “Poles”
Why aren’t people from Holland called “Holes”
- Ok, I think our time has gone
and the whole picture of English was not yet drawn.
See you later!
And I hope our next lesson will be greater.

©Larisa Rzhepishevska

Details | I do not know? | |

The hamster, the mouse and a little boy named Bubba

Once upon a time there was a little boy,
who had a bedroom filled with lots of toys.
But, of all he had he loved one thing better,
his little hamster he named Digger.
Now, Digger loved his little hamster home.
He has his own toys, but he was still alone.
Bubba would take Digger out each and every day.
Until his best friend Lucas would come over to play.
Digger wished he has a best friend of his own.
He had plenty of room in his little hamster home.
Then one night by the light of the moon.
There came a little stranger into Bubba's room.
Digger looked him up and down and lifted his nose to smell.
"You look like me," he said, "but your grey and have a long tail."
"My name is Charlie," he replied "and I'm a mouse."
"My family has made a home underneath your house."
Charlie jumped on Diggers cage and looked down the tunnel hole.
"Grab my tail, I'll pull you up and sight seeing we will go."
Charlie came for Digger when it was dark at night.
Then, bring him back before the morning light.
They played their game for many nights until they heard
Momma yell.
"There is a mouse in the house and it has a long grey tail!"
Charlie came to say goodbye, "We are moving down the rode."
"Papa say's when Momma's yell it is time to go."
Sadly, Digger watched Bubba and Lucas for many days.
He missed Charlie and the games they played.
Bubba noticed Digger was sad and knew just what to do.
"I have a surprise," Bubba said "Just for you."
When Bubba opened up the cage and stuck in his tiny hand.
Out crawled a little brown hamster who said, 
"I'm George will you be my best friend?"

Details | Light Poetry | |

The House of Frankenstein

When Frankenstein got too lonely he made himself a friend,
He made him out of the spare parts that Igor would nightly send.

He built a pal who would be loyal and would stay right by his side,
One that could be counted on until he’d found himself a bride.

The two of them would go out together to watch the baseball games,
They’d drink cold beer and eat hot dogs and whistle at the dames.

And then one day Frank met a girl who stole away his heart,
But he had others in a jar so with this one he could part.

He spent so much of his time with the girl as they daily dated,
That he had no time for old friends especially ones that he’d created.

And then one day the bells rang out and Frankenstein was wed,
The monster felt that he’d been neglected as he wished that he were dead. (Again)

But Frankenstein hadn’t forgotten him so he grabbed his saw and knife,
And stitched and sewed through the night until he’d made a monster’s wife.

Now Frankenstein and his monster still sneak out to watch a game,
But no more beer or hot dogs and without the whistling it’s not the same.

Domestication tamed these two and they’ll tell you that it’s nice,
But sometimes when there’s an angry mob they’ll think about it twice.

Because they miss all of the excitement from the days of their youth,
But not enough to give up their comforts if you want to know the truth.

Today they only reminisce about old times when Frankenstein was mad,
When he and his monster would go doing things that villagers called bad.

Now they have to be careful in what they say because Frankenstein has a kid,
And it might put ideas in his little head if he knew what his father did.

Still, sometimes when a storm is brewing and there comes a lightning flash,
The old doc will head down to the lab but claim that he was taking out the trash.

If you should ever come across this place pay heed to the warning sign,
“Parts of you are welcome to stay at the house of Frankenstein.”

A creepy, scary haunted house poem please contest

by Tony Lane

Details | Lyric | |

Child's Play

I watch you play upon the stairs,
 Lost in your childhood games,
 Built by your imagination,
 With freedom and no restraint.
 Today you are a sailor,
 The captain of your ship,
 Sailing on the ocean sea,
 Procuring a long summer trip.
 You sing a song
 That you have loved,
 Words of an old lullaby,
 You sing a song on the stairs today,
 Singing loud—you’re not shy.
 The stairs are now a jungle,
 A land that you explore,
 With a monkey and a zebra,
 A tiger and a vicious wild boar.
 You pretend you’re on a skyscraper
 High up in the sky,
 Playing like you’re really there,
 And wishing you could fly.
 Once again, you’re hungry,
 Therefore, you stop and eat your lunch,
 You’ll be a chef in your own shop,
 There’s not much time to stop.
 The stairs are now a cherry tree
 In your own loved backyard,
 With grass and flowers, and bumble bees,
 Except in this tree, you cannot scrape your knees.
 The stairs yet again, a mountain top
 Reaching high into the sky,
 But all too soon, it’s evening time
 And now, no more time to climb.

Details | Rhyme | |

Thinking Too Much

My knees hurt so bad 
I no longer dance 
And walking’s become quite a chore 

While the pain in my back 
Bothers me quite a bit 
So I end up asleep on the floor 

The days with the ladies 
I’ve long since retired 
You can see that I haven’t much luck 

So I sit writing poems 
All alone in my home 
And wish I had someone to…. have fun with

Details | Clerihew | |

SCTV Comedian

John Candy
Is quite beefy and dandy.
He is a comedian on SCTV
He's funny--everyone must agree!

Details | Rhyme | |

Day Off

It's my day off
And I need to rest
So for the work week
I'll be at my best.

There's chores to do, 
Well of course there are.
If I don't start soon
I won't get far.

Laundry and dishes
And wash the floors,
Clean the bathroom,
The most hated of chores.

Clean the birdcages.
They're messy but sweet
And no one would call
My desktop neat.

The dust on the bookcases
Is about an inch thick
So a dust cloth or garden hose,
Just take your pick.

The plants are drooping,
They're thirsty as well.
All week I've let 
This place go to hell.

No time for T.V.
No time to write.
If I don't start now
I'll be cleaning all night.

It's my day off.
Off from what ?  I say.
I work hard at my job
But I'll work harder today.

Details | I do not know? | |

When I was Young, Now I am Older

When I was young I never understood
Now I am older I wish I never could 

When I was young I had time to play
Now I am older I have no time to be free

When I was young I would drink milk 
Now I am older I could drink beer

When I was young times were good
Now I am older times are rough 

When I was young love was rare to see
Now I am older love is all around me

When I was young there was fun and laughter 
Now I am older the fun and laughter continues  

I would like to add more and might do so. Comment on some of your Young and growing older times. This is for fun

Details | Verse | |


Happy New Year!  Time will tell.

What lies ahead.  Come toll the bell

Kiss your love.  Eat pork and kraut.

Sing Auld Lang Syne.  Throw troubles out.

Make resolutions.  Add the old.

Pray for peace.  God make us bold.

Happy New Year!  As the bell does call.

Ringing in,  New hope for all.

Details | I do not know? | |


Tick tock, tick tock
Oh what a shock!
Both hands fell off 
The town hall clock.

It's sad to tell
All is not well,
But the mayor left,
And took the bell.

No hands, no chime,
Oh what a crime--
How can the townsfolk
Know the time?

Details | Dramatic monologue | |


********Their Are so many things' going on in this World that people don't know what to say or how they ACT........

Dear John:

I think that it is time
For Me to leave you alone
The last time 
I came by your house
You were gone...
It's not that I am
Your Sugar Daddy 
           And all that.....
        And certainly, not
     Your Daddy Mack
    But the last time
    That I saw you...
You had almost given
  Me a Heart Attack
We meet in the alley
Just to dilly and a little daley
But, something strange
Happen, In the alley...
And I am not one to fight
So don't think about
All the hipe'.
You droped your ID Card
Some-where in the yard
Some where in the alley
Their it was..
It was your card..
That it was a big fascuade
It said that your name
Wasn't John....
It' said Mrs. Sally
And I don't care if it
Were Steven Omalley...
Or just plain Smiley
Just not the kind of girl
That I should marrie..
Or even meet in an alley


The next time you meet John, and want to know what is up......
Just wait to see if she left the toilet seat up!

* This poem was not to pick some-one up! But, for them to listen at what
is going down!   Gary Fields'

******** This World is full of double meanings*******

Details | Verse | |


The time between sunrise and sunset
To some people serene, to some fret.
While humans pass their time in rest
The animals show urge of leaving nest.

The moon was above mountain rock
When I behold something in shock.
I found a carcass in white thick sand,
The poor wretched with twitched hand.

The two big eyes seemed to gaze at me.
How piteous a sight for a mortal’s eye!
The death of another youth in the earth
In an age which is for delight and mirth.

O immortal youth! Let not fear hell
Though you are dead but I foretell
This glorious loss would be undying
As your daring act is death-defying.

The dew of dark night upon the grass
Is weeping for you and saying, “Alas!”
I hold this sealed Sugar-pot and swear
“Heroic Ant, you will lie here forever.”

Details | Verse | |

Face To Face

Joanna Davis

So many things to do today
My goodness I’ve no time to play
The washing, ironing, then the tea
tomorrow I’ll have more time for me!
Just let me get the shopping done,
can’t stop now…I’m on the run
So many things to hide behind
If there’s nothing to do~
Something I’ll find
I’ll dig myself in so deep
even my min’s no time to sleep
I can’t slow down or stop you see
or I might come face to face with me!

Details | Rhyme | |

Fading Memory

Things can come, things can go
With a mind that has become so slow,
I cannot keep a thought for long
As I continue to go along.

This river of time I find myself in
Just keeps on going and I can't remember when.
My thoughts stay jumbled and finally lost,
Will I not be able to have a mind on the mend?

Age and memory aren't much fun,
When that river of time keeps going and you have none.
A fading mind is like a day that is ending
All that's left is a thought that needs mending.

.....?? Nuts!!

Details | Couplet | |


When May cometh full in bloom
And robins and tits build afresh their room
Many a maid and her swain
Be  found in the meadow lain
Methinks the churl  that he be  - knoweth sin
With his manhood waxing anon to the full in 
Her vale of all delight
Nay, she putteth not up a fight
But verily teaseth with hips
Of a rocking motion like ships
And bosoms of snowy mead
Yea, twixt  them a man would need
Nought but time to enjoy the feast
Time even till the sun riseth in the east
Oh, such ecstasy and sinful joy
Between yon maid and ploughboy
Must needs be stopped by laws
And by the pulpit priest’s roars
This  scandal in our midst may seem
To  blacken every villein’s dream
The energy of their loins
Were better aimed at minting coins
Or milking goats or shearing sheep
Each day before they sleep
Woollen coats or cheese to cheer
Or firkins full of barley beer
Were better use of Maytime   sun
Than meadow frolics as time doth run.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 


My apologies for the cheap double entendre  in the title
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . .. . . .

Entered in Lisa Cooper ~Dark Poetess's Contest  I want some old English scandal!

Details | Free verse | |

Mystery guy part

   Magic is it possible I can feel this feeling when i'm next to you.

 I feel free from problems from all the issues and then I come back and your no where 
to be found. 

    No I yell this was my chance but it was only a dream and I can't stop 

 It felt so real, how did they know I grabbed on to my sheets real hard 
because my dreams are just teasing me.

 Another poem about that past love that you can never forget, it's like a knife being 
stuck straight in my heart I can't feel the pain because the love was never there in the 
first place.

 It hurts so bad and sometimes it doesn't I can almost remember a time when I wasn't 
this stuck to him. 

  It was a time for carelessness and a time for laughs I didn't have this memory yet 
and i'm starting to think i'm going mad.

 Sometimes I feel like deleting this one thing that keeps me focused on you like a kid 
on candy. 

   I feel like I could never move on... it's funny how hearing you name could make me 
feel all over again.

 The worst part about this is that it never got finished and I wanted to hear the rest 
of the song.

    Lonely, A funny word sometimes it's laughable sometimes it's a crying 
tantrum spilled moment.

     A cloud has been hanging over my head for nearly forever dark and thundering 
shooting rain down my noes making me lose breath and lose focus. 

   Calling, shouting, beating, bleeding then the cloud finally lifts and I can't help 
missing it.

   It tortured me and made me feel weak and now that's it's gone I can't 
help screaming for the rain.

   Come back to me I say honestly I was fine getting 
soaked but it's gone and all I can see is blue skies and that lonely remembrance 
that I am alone.

Details | Free verse | |

Merry Christmas to All

Though we all do celebrate birthdays,
the best birthday,
falls on the twenty fifth of December,
as on this day,
our Lord,
Jesus Christ had been born,
the day is considered indeed great,
as the Son of God,
had come into this world,
and had left us by forgiving our sins,
the day begins,
by people of all castes visiting various Churches,
and offering their prayers to the Lord in here,
on this day,
the day is celebrated with a lot of passion,
and fervour,
wherein we also get to wine and dance, 
and be merry all the while,
the kids are quite happy,
as on this day,
they receive lovely gifts,
for been good kids, 
from a very special man, 
known as Santa Claus
by acting as a postman, 
but differs in style and in his way,
by delivering the gifts in advance,
as he does know that,
there is no use in relying with the snail mail,
and the kids would indeed be sad,
if they don’t get their presents in time,
whereby he does not take the usual route,
but always takes the wrong one,
by entering through the chimneys
or through the fireholes, 
how he does it,
we have no idea,
inspite of been fat,
his favourite are the cookies indeed,
wherein he seeks an easier way to get into the houses of the kids,
here’s a message,
he leaves for you all,
wishing you all a Merry Christmas!!

Dt:-21st November, 2012, Name :- Manu Nair

Details | I do not know? | |

Killing Time

Friday rolls around 
I am too excited 
My pennies are saved 
My outfit’s sorted 
Bath and make up, done 
Ready for a big night out 

One problem 
It’s the afternoon 
Tick tock, 
Tick tock 
Hurry the fek up Mr. Clock 
You really, truly hate me 

'Cause of you I’m late for work 
Early for fun 
You bore me to hell with your incessant tick tocking 
If you had a real face I would… 

I’ll have a drink 
Kill some time 
Just the one 

I sip Whisky 
And twiddle my thumbs 
Bored on the highest level 
I’ll check the Net 

Laptop open 
Booting up 
Logging on 
123 ABC 
Bingo, I’m in 

I have three emails 
Unless I needed to grow my ***** ten more inches 
Date a married man 
Or join Mob Wars and get one million fake dollars for online poker 
Now there’s a bit of competition for you 

Facebook is where it’s at on a Friday afternoon 
Isn’t it? 
Let me see if there are any interesting status updates 

Unless I care that Trudy is having a nice cup of tea after getting all her ironing done 
Wow, Susan planted apple trees on her farm, and took a snapshot (WTF?) 
David is with Mark, Kate and Lesley somewhere near Southend 
I’m glad I’m thousands of miles away from the weirdoes 

Oh, wait a second 
I have an invite! 
And it’s something to do with food 
My profile says I’m a chef 
I post tons of pictures of food 
Finally something worth opening 

Amy has invited me to join Chef World 
Now I can work in a virtual kitchen cooking virtual food after spending all day in a real kitchen cooking real food 
Idiotic waste of time 

I click the link and enter a bright red kitchen 
Timers scattered 
Pots and pan readied 
Bacon eggs, beans and fries to cook 
All need coordinating 
Timing is crucial 

And she’s off 
Fries on 
Bacon, wait for it 
Wait for it 
Toast down 
Beans on 
Toast pops 
Fries burnt 
Eggs burnt 

I try again 
And again 
After 4 hours I’m a virtual pro 
The phone rings 
‘Kim, I’ll be there in ten, be ready.' 
'I'll try.' 
You've had all day, what you doing?’ 
'Murdering time.'

Details | Rhyme | |


*********************************** ******************* *********************************** HAPPY B,DAY JOHN LOVE BEADY N SKINBOB XX

Details | I do not know? | |


your more of a mystery 
 when i don't know who you are.
 you took the fun out when you open your mouth.
 and even though i sat quite
 almost in ah at what was coming out 
 or the fact that i just spent my time listening to it
 .i find that your communication is pointless.
 and i want this moment in time
 that has me wanting to pull out my hair to end.
 BUT you keep talking! 
and me being who i am
 not wanting to shatter your ego
 so i ablege only on purpose.
 for the character that you are seems a little weak
 I must keep up my own appears so i do not speak 
yet wait for the moment to remove myself from this place. 
If i could go back in time this I would erase!

Details | ABC | |


3 poems for contest entry

Failure to come to a Complete Stop

Auto battery. 
Depleted energy.
Feeling grumpy, harried, 
Impatiently jump-start Kia.
Leave Mom’s neighborhood.
Octagonal, purely quintessential red sign taunts. 
Upping velocity, willfulness exacerbated, you zoom…


Extraneous white vehicle (undercover) trumpets sirens.
Realization quickens… Pegged!
Officer notes makeshift license knowingly.
Jail imbues hastily.
Gaining freedom – eight-thousand dollars cash.
Busted again.


When the Princess gets Agitated

Some things

Some things

Some things


Sorry, time out, please.


When Time Stands Still

Leaping in barefoot abandon
Soaring every which way from Sunday
Laughter effortlessly exhaling cool breezes.

Lounging on nature’s lush carpet
Silhouette illumined by carefree serenity 
Lapping up rays and shining them back

Licorice sticks and crackers and brie
Sweet plumpness of kiwi and mango and peach 
Licking ripe juices off contented grin

Long luscious showers in waterfall glory
Swirling delightfully playfully pure
Lingering loving caresses of freshness 

Last blush of daylight’s electrical charge
Sunset yields gracefully generously kind
Lights flicker syntax where space enfolds meaning

Lay here beside me
Savor my dream
Let my enchantment touch yours

Details | Narrative | |

The Dictionary Hunting Expedition

Yeah, just grab an old rusty shovel, a case of Bud Light and hop in the back of my red
pickup truck, because us country boys are heading down to Sweetwater Creek to hunt for
some rare species of dictionary. Boy, don't you worry about nothing. We got plenty of
ammo. Uncle Willie, you know them dictionaries got some powerful stuff. 

Yeah, they got all kinds of words that I cain't spell or spit out my mouth. Some folks
say, you can use them fancy-polished words printed in a dictionary. You boys know better.
We can't read, write or arithmetic! Boys, we need to shake a stick, saddle up and go
rustle up some wild dictionaries. To capture a wild dictionary, you need to wear
specialized Desert Storm camouflaged gear, and be very quiet! 

Boys, its time for the hunting dictionary expedition!

Now, big Willie, listen to me good, when we find this critter, I am not settling for a
handshake, because I need to bust a few caps in those hind parts with my double-pump
shotgun. Boy, be quiet. Do you hear something rattling behind them bushes? Hey, look down
yonder! Oh, Nellie, I got a big surprise for that old slick Willy dictionary.

Well, I am a Southern Boy, with a background in cannon artillery and fire weaponry. I will
deliver the final blow and knockout punch with my deluxe  K-Mart special, double barrel
Winchester rifle, equipped with a high-powered scope, aiming  right-between-the-eyes of
the victim. 

Big Willie, You know stuff is going to fly in every direction. Now, its time to grab that
slippery dictionary right by the tail, fling it straight up in the air and shake the
cobwebs loose! Just in case, we might have to tap it with a few more rounds of buckshot
from my shotgun named big Shirley. You know, just so I can let it marinade. 

Man, I am so cool, when I captured this black double-breasted Oxford dictionary, I skinned
it and cleaned it and turn it into a thesaurus. 
 Posted By: Gregory W Golden Dated 16 Oct 2006

Details | Prose Poetry | |

The Writers Tail liaT sretirW ehT

The Writers Tail liaT sretirW ehT
by Charles Robert Hice on Wednesday, November 28, 2012 at 12:22pm ·
The Writers Tail
the poor writer can not post a poem anywhere to be recognized himself as a poet unless he writes a longish Devels tail complete with hooks and forks and splitting hoofs and tines in tomes you realize these publishers drink large amounts of alcoholic beverages and seek people to turn down they love to see someone saying homeless poems the frown and then the delete button when will they come to some conclusion that the ether thinking is the faulty mind life is better lived poor and sober how can any one help others to be someone iff they are drunk feet upp on the ottoman ice clinking against the windows and the glasses always half full and half empty ready at any moment to delete all details of any poor peoples emails so you want to post in this magazine afraid knot click delete delete the extra page is missing the long appendage added on is gone they removed all of the appendix index we told you to send an attachment means a file a doc or a document eye tried to attach my soul to my heart but there just is no space is taken up one old woman no pets allowed someday every item that eye write will flash before my eye it will be broadcast on heavens wifi for all the angels there to read each dot and t is crossed there no time lost to read eye will post my items on the heavens wifi for all eternity you stupid people who cant publish me make photostatic copies of my work and glue them to the bottoms of your shoes and stomp them in the dirt you walk back and forth on your thrown rug down on the floor until you cannot see the words and then you toss them into doors threw cracks and howl with glee cause Johnny cannot read me YOU CARACKED MY READING GLASSES BROKE MY TEETH  AND MADE ME GASP FOR BREATH TO BREATHE now little Johnny cannot read. Three shoelaces to make two shoes how many feet does little Johhny use. This tale hath a tail like the INcan Comet of Destruction can you see it in the sky it will be there the day we die. HOT ROCKS FALLING FROM THE SKY the day before the world turned green and died. Here is the cannonical mathmatical equation now. Take the INfinite lights in the sky what they really seem to be and move them to the end of time try to see them falling down. Tumble to the sea my lasting problems will never get ahold of me to hurt me whan they tumble to the sea eye will be set free whan my lasting problems thay tumble to the sea

Details | Ballad | |

Drinkin Buddies

Pour a shot for me, pour a shot for you.
Swallow down, so quick is the liqueur.
You recoil in pleasure, it tastes good.
Set it up again, time to put up another two.

You think about forgetting the pain,
But your just making it all worse.
Slowly, slowly the picture gets dizzier,
Good judgement goes down the drain.

You love the crown, and he does his job,
Making you feel heavy then ultra light.
Words mind as well be backwards,
And all your thoughts, so many, he did rob.

You look at each other, sloppily thinking,
And you remember what you did forget.
Unsure if the other is feeling the same way.
Look away, wondering, both keep drinking.

F- it! You slow melt into the way it was.
Sooo goooood, but oh soooo baaaaadddd!
The restraint clock is over, time to give in,
You're already too far, no stop, no pause.

Tricky is the soundtrack, intense is the play.
Between are you two, crazy is this game.
Long, amazing, wishing it could last forever,
But you doubt it, you wake sober the next day. 

Was so much fun, and it was much shattering.
Again, you are so weak, you shake your head.
Your foolishness, your eyes drawn asunder.
But so much more then one night of smattering. 

You part, intense attraction you have to ignore,
But so comfortable and also so careless.
You try not look over you shoulder at the other.
Never again... Hell, till they put up two more.

Details | Free verse | |

A Township Day - A School time memory

This is a true story of seven students
Agone days of those ill-famed fiddles
Musing with drolleries – assiduity on catchy missies
And lamed against educators animalism.
Books usually kept aside but concentration hard on last night
Weekends glossed upon soul mate’s hug
Weekdays went upon escaping tutorials
And the freshers on boozing thought, to try out school time dipso bash. 

Once in the winter of two thousand one
Seven students planned for such a dipso bash
By escaping from school in the first half
After the party, to rejoin their lectures in the second half. 
This was just an act of vengeance
To prove the youthful independence
They tried to live with self prominence
Extropies to get caught, was out of their dominance. 

One among them sorted out the program
After the assembly followed by the literature lecture
They are to jump over the fence, a height of twelve feet,
Bounded by the cycle stand.
The bell rang and before the second lecture started
They adhered to their plan. 
One followed the other, eyes sleuthing everywhere
Fortuitously they moved along the corridor
To the cycle stand.

The guard might have gone for a cup of tea
Hence the coast was clear, and
Those sleuthing eyes calculated the time
And decided to involve into a black-listed crime.
The fence was too high, yet didn’t bothered them
One bicycle was supported to the wall
And the other was carefully placed on top
One was holding and others climbed up
The last one to go somehow made the jump. 

Scatted seven breached the rules
And pelted along the street,
The moment of triumph was cracked by relish,
Towards the destiny, only belonged to those educatees. 
Everything was planned - two large Royal Stag
Seven disposable glasses and potato chips,
The cold water and ice cubes then blended their time with juvenility
An awaited moment, felt like a walk to the heaven. 

Blitzed seven minds headed for the school
By the plan they were going to attain those second-half lectures
Wobbling through the corridors all the seven
Were now the back benchers of the class
Caught by few classmates and asked to keep numb.
Two lectures over the last one to go
Those dreadful sleepy eyes 
Somehow looked very attentive in class for the first time.

Lectures were over and they escaped luckily
The act of vengeance 
Ultimately proved their independence
All they did was just to encounter the consequence.

Details | Free verse | |

Did Father Let You Go

My soul mate My soul mate
Did father let you go?
From the pearly gates of heaven
In due time we shall know
My true love My true love
Just being in your presence
My faced began to glow
Our first encounter was pleasant
My future man My future husband
Meeting you was a blessing
It happen so quickly you were my man and I became your woman
My time with you so far has been amazing
You had to be sent from heaven
Because when I met you I promised to be in a love recession

Details | Lyric | |

blue grass road

It was two am at the pit stop lounge
it was closing time, time to go
i seen you walking, you was all alone
i said i'd feel much better if i walked you home
i guess i should of asked ya which way was home
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road 

well the stars were shinning the moon was bright
the cold when was blow'n but i didn't mind
we laughed and joked until we cried 
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road

now ain't it funny the people we meet
I tell ya some talk dirty and some talk sweet
now ain't it funny the things we do
i tell ya it was miles of road that i walked with you
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road 

a couple years gone by and friends still we are
we're still drinking beers in that same old bar
yeah i'll never forget that night we met
cause a night like that you cant forget 
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road
it was a long time wlak'n down blue grass road

well the stars were shinning the moon was bright
the cold when was blow'n but i didn't mind
we laughed and joked until we cried 
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road
it was a long time walk'n down blue grass road

Details | Monorhyme | |


I wear a beard of aging, upon a cliff-face chin
A year has passed and grown its hairs out from my mottled skin
Mistakes sit there unchallenged, to each fibre clings a sin
Yet despite my facial mask of age the clubs won’t let me in

Details | Rhyme | |

The Open Window

I’m already ahead and stirring before that fiery Sunrise appears every single morning.
I'm quickly catching up to my own waiting for the breaking of this phenomenal day.
My coffee will be in my hand right when my thoughts once again start freshly forming!
Ah, I’m feeling alive inside and I think I’ll just stay right here for each second of today.

I glide through my house to stream Sunlight in by pulling every single window shade up,
I toast this day pouring my fresh hot brew straight into my scuffed up old-timers tin cup.
It’s the open window where I see my birds on my oak tree branches singing and playing, 
I just stand at the open window licking early morning honeydew from my lips and I say,
Now this is the most outstanding way to start any God given day with this superb array!

There are just so many smelly buttercups blooming out for me to pluck them up to sup!
I’m smiling whistling and getting enthusiastic about allowing myself to get carried away,
Because I hear my happy little birdies singing their hearts out to me and they’re in tune!

Let us in! Let us in! They twitter their tweets with chirps, 
Let us in and we will sing all day long just to be near you.
Laughing and giggling at my birdies I am just tickled pink,

No way Jose!
I can’t sing! 
My silly, silly little birdies, 
Y’all know my singing stinks.

My buzzing bumbling bee hummers away driving at the winds to boot,
I holler and holler for that goofy buzzer until I’m just not giving a hoot.
So I lift my tin cup up and in my air I toast to a genuine wholeness today,

By the open window I whisper to my eternally inspirational four winds of heaven, 
Forever you may live insde my breaths majestically just as my infallible Sunrays!

® Registered: Ann Rich  2005

Details | Free verse | |

Time to Remeber

This is a nice place, it's a good place to wonder in my thoughts, it's a good time to admire the peace and quiet, such silence, hmm, quite the times I had, where to start, now why did I throw that guy out the river, what an occasion, I do remember being a bit more crazy but that might just be too weird to just throw someone off for a reason I cannot remember, hope I don't run into him, wouldn't know what to say, it would be to akward. That time was fun, cruising on that boat, that was quite the cruise with chocolate cake, how I can savor the taste with all that chocolate, the cream so moist and tasteful with soft soft bread, can't believe that's about all i remember. That was a good cake.... Wow I a lonely......

Details | Blank verse | |


A long time ago, in the dark lands of the gentile pagans
The people where like giants and our twelve spies; ants!
The spies’ mission went sour and they were almost captured.
Ten managed to escape to our lovely desert camps; enraptured!
The other two made themselves scarce, to the inconvenience of a woman
 Who hid them in the roof of her house and lied to save their hides.   
By and by, our brave woman married one spy and another gentile woman
Married the other spy…oh the dreadful tides!!!
It so happened that our promiscuous spies both died, and at the same time too.
Their distraught mother (for they were brethren) decided to return home.
But the woman who had first hid them made bid to return with her
But Old Childless Mother said “turn away my daughters for thou hast seen I have 
No sons and am too old and ugly to attract a man, for surely any man attracted to
Me in this state must darn well be impotent or desperate!”
The second saw reason and turned back home to her shows for her name was Orpah Winfey.
The one who had first hid the spies refused and said (with courageous theme playing in 
The background) “intreat me not to turn aside, for wither thou goest, I will go and wither 
Thou lodgest I shall be thine squatter and where thou diest I shall be present for the wake keep!”
When she saw that her determination was deeply ruthed, Old Childless Widow sayest unto her;
“Damn, why the hell not!”
So it came to pass that Ruth came to dwell with us, the chosen people.
But she was an outright lazy pile of bones, what with all the sitting all day under palm trees
And gisting and gossiping with passersby.  Well some folk thought she was a prophet
His name was Barak Oboma, he was dark and handsome and he was our leader.
She made him start a war with the people in the East whose military was whispered 
In dark places to be to be “The Talibansers” but that is a tale for another day.
Here ends the unnecessarily protracted and adjusted story of Root: the harlot turn
 Wife turn widow turn immigrant turned prophet.

Details | Light Poetry | |

I Need More Time Captain

“Take us to your leader,” is what they said to me, 
So I asked them just who it was that they thought that I might be. 
That stumped them for a moment as they had a little talk, 
Then they aimed a ray gun at me and said, “It’s time to take a walk.” 
“I’m not kidding,” I said to them, “I don’t know what you mean, 
Do you want to meet my wife or the President Martin Sheen?” 
“We’ve traveled for too many miles so quit acting like a jerk, 
We’re tired of being pushed around and we want to meet Captain Kirk.” 
“Oh, I see, well as you must know Captain Kirk is two very busy men, 
I have to know which one you seek before we can determine when.” 
“You mean there’s more than one of him? We don’t see how that can be, 
We thought that he got put back inside his body at the end of season three.” 
“He did,” I reassured them, “But we’re getting more episodes at last, 
A new movie series is being filmed and Captain Kirk has been recast.” 
They just stood there blinking their three eyes. I wasn’t making any sense, 
And the longer they stood pondering it the more I was growing tense. 
“So, when the time comes on your planet that someone grows too old, 
You simply replace them with a younger guy that seems kind of cold.” 
“I think so too,” I reassured them, “But that’s the way it is, 
Youth and beauty rule the day when you’re an actor in show biz. 
The original Captain Kirk had a run that lasted longer than it should,” 
The little guys just hung their heads but I think that they understood. 
They all turned and slowly headed back to climb into their ship, 
Then one of them turned to me and asked, “What about Indy and his whip?” 
“It isn’t pretty,” I said to them, “Please don’t see The Crystal Skull, 
It’s not what you’re hoping for and the story is down right dull.” 
I watched their ship as it flew away and I couldn’t help but feeling sad, 
A bunch of middle aged aliens just lost the heroes that they’d had. 
I knew exactly how they felt because no lesson is taught for free, 
And sometimes I will look around to see who is being cast as me.

Details | Free verse | |

Two Thoughts

There was one - then there were two...
they looked identical,
they sounded the same,
they even laughed the same way.
I saw one - she looked cute,
or was it the other one?
I talked to her - she seemed nice,
or was it the other one?
I asked her out - she said "yes,"
or was it the other one?
I picked her up - she looked stunning,
or was it the other one?
We had a great time laughing, joking,
and enjoying the time together.
I dropped her off at her house -
we kissed "goodnight" for hours,
or was it the other one?
While driving home, I couldn't stop thinking about her,
or was I really thinking about the other one?

For "A Dilemma" contest sponsored by Joe Flach.

Details | Rhyme | |

Wasted on the young

Oh how my son can I make you see the error of your ways,
You think all men past 40 have surely had their days,
And as for women they are not worth a glance,
You give them no time when you preen and prance, 
You think your god's gift to all you think that matter, 
But my son it takes a lot more than clever patter,
You need to be charming; quick witted; and funny,
Not just a flash git, with a pocket full of money,
You must show respect and be gracious in defeat,
Don’t sulk and ridicule because they don’t kiss your feet,
Don’t drink to excess; so that you mumble and stumble, 
The female gender can make a drunken boy feel terribly humble, 
And when it comes time to depart, 
Don’t I repeat don’t go home with 
The tart?

Details | Quatrain | |

4 in less than forty continued read next first

Is that two, in sixteen minutes flat
This one must now have short lines
I usually keep form, also word stat
What rhymes with lines, I know vines

This one is sillier than those before
It’s becoming very obvious to the eye
I think I won’t be able to complete 4
Did I use 4 instead of four, oh this guy

This guy a term often used in a jest
Basically means that I am a clown
I think this is not even funny at best
I may end up giving myself a frown

I am now freestyling, oh it’s so fun
Word say that the f word isn’t a word
I will use it anyway so I can be done
Word gets not a falcon, but a dirty bird

Just when I thought I couldn’t do 4
Haha I was able to use it a second time
I think that’s the 4th time for time now
But I wouldn’t even bet ½ of a plug dime

That’s a nickel written in fraction form
Not really that clever for an american guy
That’s three times for guy, not my norm
I now myself am left to even question why

Well I do not plan on arriving late to my spot
That would defeat the purpose of this test
It would also leave my appointment hot
I would be beaten with a stick at very best

No they wouldn’t literally beat me to a pulp
But they wouldn’t approve of my activity
They would say that I am an ignorant dope
That I  have a real lack any kind of sensitivity

I must close this one with an extra stanza
What the bloody heck rhymes with that
I could make something up, wow bonanza
No that’s not my word, I’m a copy cat

Details | Rhyme | |

Festive 'Spirit'

“Pour me another” is all that I hear
When I’m down the pub at this time of year
I don’t want your Vodka, Archers or Rum
And I don’t want the drinks set aside for your Mom
A drop of the black is just what I need
Pour me a pint, or maybe two, or just three

It pours so gently into the glass
A perfect pint, it’s in it’s own class
With its beautiful body and its creamy white head
I reach out my hand and I’m easily led
“Good things come to those who wait”
How true are those words that seal my fate!

My intentions are good, my intentions are true
I’ll have just the one …   or maybe a few
As I down the first, the second and more
I converse with wisdom about legends of yore
My words of great wit just continue to flow
I’m at peace with the world, there’s a definite glow!

And so this fine evening has drawn to a close
I put one foot in front and just follow my nose
Through the town centre and straight up the hill
Best call me a taxi … I think his name’s Bill!
But there’s no need to worry, there’s nothing to fear
I’ll be back in the bar in good time for New Year!

Details | Narrative | |

The Funny Farm Revisited

 Well it’s getting close to that time again,
    When I’m not suppose to be happy and I’d better not grin.
Hiding is okay as long as you don’t make a sound,
    Pray like all get out that you don’t get found.
Well it freaks me out to say the least,
    One minute she’s happy the next she turns into a beast.
Someone said they got a pill for this kind of thing,
    I’ll give her a double dosage and hope it’s relief it brings.
If it don’t work on her I’ll try one of them pills,
     Just thinking about last month done brought on a bad ole chill.
I’ll just keep my mouth shut that’s the best thing I can do,
     I’ll just look at her and nod and pray I nod in the right direction too.
Here she comes with that sweetie pie look,
     The last time I saw that my goose was about to cook.
So if you guys don’t hear from me in the next few days,
     Know it’s been fun but she said right now I’ve got dues to pay.
I guess I’d better close, ouch hang on baby let me finish this line,
     Dat gummit woman now don’t hit me with that sign.
Well she didn’t break but one hand so I can still hunt and peck,
     She’s like that Dr. that turned into a monster I feel like I was in a wreck.
Going through the change doesn’t seem to bother her at all,
     Shoot I’m the one sporting bruises and having close calls.
Well that pill made her sleepy, 
      But her eyes are wide open and that’s down right creepy.
I guess I’d better close,
     And go change the cotton in my nose, night all!!!!!

Details | Rhyme | |

The Dare

I've been going back
in time for just a bit
Thinking back on my life
those times I had no wit
Being in the eighth grade
I remember all so well
The time I was given a dare
ten minutes before the bell
There was a popcorn maker
that sat just down the hall
The kernels, oil and salt
in our room, we kept it all
I don't remember every detail
just the basic truth
I was dared to snort the salt
and in my blissful youth,
I thought, "Whatever,
it can't be all that bad"
So they laid it on the table
and took a pen from the pad
Pulled out the ink
so now the pen was hollow
I had not the slightest clue
of what was about to follow
I laid the pen before the line
and up my nose it went 
The biggest sting I ever felt 
as my knees slightly bent
I coughed and hacked for a few
my orange nose was surely glowing
Trying to see through watery eyes
I thought my sinuses were showing
As they all rolled and laughed
I took the pen and threw it
Said, "If you think it's that funny,
then one of you do it!"
Just then the room got quiet
could hear a pen drop in the joint
So, a smile fell across my face
as I had just proved my point
Of course they had the right to laugh
my stupidity wasn't their fault
But a lesson learned in school that day
never, ever snort the salt!

Details | I do not know? | |

A long line of scallywags

I love my son he's always chipper
he's my scallywag and I'm the skipper
and the apple does'nt fall far from the tree
he's menatly challenged just like me!

and even though his dad's a zero
"hey dad your my hero!"
having fun is all he's wishing
"hey dad ya wanna go fishin?"

lost the house a home we have not
"hey dad looky what I caught!"
no business financal ruin we sank
"aww dad you can have my piggy bank"

rich kids need toys to have fun
"love you dad!" "love you son!"
think no toys would make him sad?
such a good boy "your the best dad!"

now I know I won't always live forever
"hey dad we always be together?"
"no worries son just stay chipper
you'll have your own scallywag and you'll be the skipper!"

by Captain Mike Harris and his son

Details | Free verse | |

The Bill of Rights, Part I

The Bill of Rights was ratified
by citizens in these states,
But, see, now there is a problem
Today, it’s the world we face.
There are ten things Gov. cannot do,
They are spelled out for everyone.
For now, these rights are set in stone.
Let’s review them, one by one.

The right to worship where you dare
is the Number One protection.
Arab, Jew or the Satanist;
Free from undo persecution.
But when their Gods tell them to kill
we will hunt the sinners down.
We’ll even fight in foreign lands
and bomb them into the ground.

It also says to speak your mind!
It was next on Jefferson’s slate.
But, please, don’t utter the wrong words,
No obscenities from your crate.
Burn a flag and we don’t care,
The Supreme Court said one day.
Even fools deserve a voice.
But, in schools, you cannot pray.

Freedom of press is mighty nice
Till Paparazzi track you down.
How does the First Amendment
Let them treat you like a clown?
If the press is wrong, you can sue
But infrequently will you win.
The Courts have said, time and again,
Their mistakes we will pardon.

The right to gather we do have.
Thank the Gods they put this in.
Just make the choice of time and place
And let the world see you win.
Protest someone’s execution,
Say CNN and Fox News,
We will ask you stupid questions
And take shots from different views.

Right to Bare Arms is Number Two
NRA says that’s a FACT now.
Our founding fathers never saw
An SMG shot at a cow.
If they had, I truly think,
They’d be completely horrified.
A change of minds you’d see so fast,
‘less, of course, they’re petrified.

Militia is a good idea.
Let’s secure the federation.
Please don’t shoot the officers
When they come for regulation.
You’ll only see the FBI
If you buy weapons banned,
Or if you brainwash members
To take poison from your hand.

Number Three? No GIs in home:
Not at peace, nor if at war.
Unless the Houses pass a law
Proposed by a senator.
But even with that stupid law
We will ask before we do.
Forefathers said we surely must
Just don’t expect us to pay you.

Details | Light Poetry | |

I Love My Job!

The alarm clock signals a brand new day,
So I dress, and head for my job,to earn my pay.
It's a very pleasant morning, as I arrive at WOORRKK!
(Even the sound of that word makes me react with a jerk.)
I show up every day; whether it's in sun,or snow or rain.
OOPS! It's 7:35! Guess I show up late again!
Punch on the clock,and it's time to face the BOSS!
Reluctantly,I reach down,and pick up my daily cross.
Case and pull. Pull and case, while others around me whine!
The only question on my mind:"How long till quitting time?"
I ask the BOSS if she's"selling five" hours of annual leave;
Only to realize, I've no leave left(which causes me to grieve.)
So I face my case, and resume my work, with my head sadly bowed.
Must that guy working next to me , really be so loud?
OUCH! Another elastic broke--and I think that I know why!
But the response I get is,"Not my fault man, blame the other guy!"
Time to pull down and see that all my dear customers get served:
(Though sometimes they yell and complain--which really strikes a nerve!)
At last my truck is loaded, and I'm set to go.
"See ya later, slugs" I shout; then I'm on the road.
Scan my MSPs, and record the mileage and such;
If you ask me, I think this is too much!
I'm in and out of businesses, and running my route all through the day.
Scan barcodes; do parcels,and accountables--oh, and some letters along the way!
I've learned a lot of acronyms, that no civilian would ever guess:
Like NSN;UAA; FOE: and DPS!
But I'll soon retire, and be away from here.
My wife will call "JIMMMMY", to which I'll meekly say "Yes Dear".
I'll be running here and doing that, and fixing everything in sight!
Surely, she'll keep me hopping-- morning, noon, and night!
There'll be no more time for naps;
In fact I may have to work at a second job, so our insurance doesn't lapse!
And when I get old--eh, older--and am in my rocking chair,
I'll think about this job, and the good times I had there.
Reflecting on my career; yes even recalling working with this ungainly mob;
I'll awake one day and realize---I really DID love my job!

                                                                                               Charlie Pelota

Details | Couplet | |

Pauper bow to King, King bow to Pauper

There are times, when I the pauper, pretend that I am King.

Power uncontested have I, the master of everything.

Beloved by all my subjects who adore me from afar.

Festivals honoring this miracle me, my name etched in the stars.

Tailored cloths adorned with jewels to cover my royal hide.

A simple tear or pin prick drip and I toss them all outside.

The finest foods from around the world brought in each time I dine.

Fill the goblets of glowing gold with most luxurious wine.

My leisure is of royal command my joy by royal decree

Just think of it, a whole Kingdom thinking me High and Mighty.

A knock disturbs my nap one day in late afternoon.

Another ball in my honor at the next full moon.

Posing for another sculpture, another portrait commissioned.

This bard’s song of my good deeds, and that one’s new rendition.

My every day so busy now, my Kingdom must prepare,

Strong against our enemies, may they all beware.

I toil over strategies and rulings of my court.

Solving problems of those little people with whom I do not consort.

Into bed I fall asleep exhausted every night.

My advisers unrelentingly needing my ear at first light.

More battles to be won today new subjects fall in line.

Soon the entire world it seems might very well be mine.

The people they need food and drink, I must divide the lands.

The royal lists of would be Lords, all under my command.

Arguments continue on it seems they never end.

So many to bow before me and yet I’m without one friend.

Every decision a higher cost, nothing’s simple on this throne.

It has been near fifteen years since I had some time alone.

Slumping on my golden throne, lost in royal thought.

Sometimes when I am King I pretend that I am not.

Details | Couplet | |

Start to slam 1

I'd like to welcome to the stage, a man of wide girth, I'd like to add, he wasn't like this at birth. Oh how time has treated him well,all that goodness can be seen, when he stretches to the sky, and out flops his jelly belly. I guess working at Mac Donald's, isn't the best place to be, a burger for you, and three burgers for me. Never mind little brother, it's bout what's in the inside, doesn't matter that you eat enough, to feed a small empire. I know it's only comfort food, because you feel really sad, but it's OK brother, you don't have to feel bad. Just because I got all the good looks, and left overs where yours, it's hard work being so dang good looking, constantly adored. Welcome to the soup my brother, we've only just begun, and to those that choose to follow us, now it's time to have some fun. M.Mahauariki © 2012

Details | Free verse | |

The Running Chestnut - euphemisms

Next you can expect Running Chestnut                                                                               over the hill and through the grove            									                                                                                                                	  in three moons and a coon's age but  											I am only as old as I can still remember 										      only as I feel No rain no gain in my december pond  									In my day we walked uphill bare footed in dirt older than                                                                                                                            	both ways in around about way growing gracefully                                                                                                           	Help I've fallen asleep at the wheel in my golden age								and can't get up to see blue hair on the back burner    								Coming and going expression lines upon my face                                                                                                                                 	 a moment of good vintage did I leave the stove on 								The Running Chestnut doesn't fall to far from the tree

Details | Narrative | |

Amiana Visits Grandma Flo

Amiana was so very happy When she finally got to go For a wonderful visit to see Her happy Grandma Flo They both got right on the ball Since many years had passed Without any visits at all Now the time was here at last They first tried their luck With a pizza they ate The cheese and paper got stuck But it really tasted great Next they decided to write A poem about the visit Grandma was a funny sight When she kept saying tis-it The poem was going to be About Butch the ceramic statue But their minds changed you see For there was nothing he could do Grandma’s dog Sophie made a fuss They just couldn’t concentrate As she was getting so rambunctious But she got quite after she ate With so much they wanted to do They made a list to prioritize Then for energy to get all through They first began with exercise Amiana needed to stretch her skin As she was beginning to grow And with Grandma getting so thin Her skin needed tightening you know They told funny stories to each other When they finished doing a dance They planned to put poems in ABC order But never did get the chance They giggled and laughed all around And even hid snow globes too Hard to locate but always found After searching through and through A lot squeezed into two days Amiana made a big poster And figured out a puzzle maze That Grandma Flo drew for her They dusted and shined the whatnots And took time to play with Sophie They updated calendars and did a lot While building special memories In the morning they still had fun They watched a little Joel Osteen And planned to go out in the sun But first got a few things cleaned Even using a timer they didn’t realize While tanning and talking of the fun they had That it was time to go home and were surprised When they were greeted by her mom and dad They will both remember this day When Amiana was only seven And how they laughed and played Like it was a joyful day in heaven Florence McMillian (Flo)

Details | Lyric | |

Ode To "Survivor"

Another season of Survivor is almost at an end.
That there will be a "shocking twist", you can depend.
Jeff will be snarky, and the Jury, too.
"Why should we give a million dollars to YOU?"
"Let me explain why I'm the best player EVER!"
That is every remaining contestant's endeavor.
Immunity Challenge victories are a must to move on.
If you fail at those, you will likely be gone.
There will be strategizing all day, and conspiring all night.
With only 5 Castaways left, the end is in sight.
At the final Tribal Council, we will finally get to the vote.
But before it is read, Jeff will hop into a boat.
The suspense is nerve-wracking, who will win Survivor this season?
Will the Jury be vindictive, or vote with common sense and reason?
After Jeff reads the votes, the winner is announced live.
The audience erupts like a swarming beehive.
The time has now come for the "One Hour Live Reunion Show".
The questions begin; there's so much we want to know.
Were there any secret scandals, does everybody hate each other now?
Will Jeff get an amazed look on his face, and say surprisedly, "Wow!"?
Last but not least, we will get Previews for next season's show.
The anticipation is crescending, soon it will overflow.
Next thing you know, Survivor is over once again.
Soon, the emptiness and despair will descend.
How will we survive the next 2 months of our lives?
The trauma will surely make us all break out into hives!
Just when we think we can function no more,
And we're crying like babies down on the floor.
Right at the time when we begin to think that our spirits have been broken,
We hear the glorious words of Jeff, "The tribe has spoken!"!
Our spirits are renewed, Survivor is back one more time!
I can finally put an end to this silly rhyme!
Thursday nights will once again be the best.
We will find another favorite player, to whom our hearts will invest.
We will hope they form the right alliances and play the game smart.
To be voted out, would be a dagger to our hearts!
Survivor will live on, this thread will NEVER die!
When next season ends, we will once again cry.
The summer will be boring, we will be counting the days,
Until the Fall Season arrives with a new group of castaways.
If you read this entire poem, I am extremely impressed!
Survivor fans are truly the best!
I can't wait to join you, on the Survivor journey next year!
Until then, I wish you good luck and good cheer!

Details | Free verse | |

Somebody Loves Me

Produced 50 yrs ago
My master Pravin Pant Sr.
Felt it was time for my Just Born coop to grow
So he introduced me to some other chicks
Bunnies bats cats pumpkins and
Even thought of placing some lucky stars
In for the heck of it what a day of cellabration
Now he has flipped his lid once again and took a few friends back
Had turned them into lip balms but I don't mind
For they will stay forever fresh on my lips as I speak of them
I been dropped off buildings had been steam rolled over
And each time I bounced back with zest
So please come rescue us from this crazy farmer
Place me in a warm basket or cake or even a dressed table 
For I m just a little peep looking for somebody to love

To The Peep 
In All Of Us    LOL

Details | I do not know? | |

To Be a Child Again by Kenny Davis

To Be a Child Again by Kenny Davis

I see the children of today
Their smiles take me away
To my times as a child
And the games that I would play

To be a child again
Means to be taken to an imaginary place
Where a box could be a house or race car
Or a ship in outer space

To be a child again
Means Mother is God in my eyes
My father is like my hero
Like Superman in the skies

To be a child again
There are many times, I would smile from ear to ear
I would jump into my parent’s loving arms
With nothing left to fear

To be a child again
Full of bedtime stories and fairy tales
Whether it was Jack and the Beanstalk
Or Jack and Jill with their water pails

To be a child again
My life filled with Mother Goose
The tails of Humpty Dumpty
And Green Eggs and Ham from Dr. Seuss

Now that I have grown
I recall my times as a child
So young, so innocent
So reckless and wild

To be a child again
My parents would wipe away every tear
It is all of those tender moments as a child
That I will always hold dear

© June 2009 k.davis

Details | I do not know? | |

Be Garfield For More Than A Day

Let's face it you're getting old
You can't deny it
Your time has come to retire
You didn't get fired, more like you quit

You say you'll miss us
But I know that's not true
You're glad to be home
You'll pretend to be Garfield, that's what you'll do

You might miss having something to do
But tv will take it's place
You'll kick back and relax
Next time I see you, you'll have a real smile on your face

So enjoy your retirement
Be Garfield for more than a day
You've served your time in this prison (school)
But tech. it's time to be on your way

Details | Limerick | |

Freedoms Not Allowed

Not allowed to chew gum anymore,
What will be next, not able to open door?
This may seem frivolous.
Will be advantageous,
To profiteer, he will know the score. 

Details | I do not know? | |

Blue Day

I woke up this morning rolled over in bed
It was the weekend by the way
I knew right off by the mood I was in 
That this would be a blue day

The sun was shinning cheerily
There wasn’t a cloud in the sky
Why I was grumpy, I’ll never know
I will never know just why

When the day is blue, I’m not talking about the color
But the mood that I’m in instead
There is no food that will comfort me
When I get up this way out of bed

 I was having a good hair day my teeth seemed extra white
But I thought I looked like a big blob
I got even grumpier when I was by myself
After my husband left for his job

I hate having days that are like this
The days that are oh so blue
I’m mean to myself and everyone else
Antidepressants are way past due!

Details | I do not know? | |

Time changes, lorries don't

Here I am to tell you a story
of an old and broken lorry
and it's friend, the old garage,
they were both heroes once.

Back by decades it happened once
that some guy bought a garage.
Believe me was the man surprised,
when he saw a lorry inside.

The lorry wasn't in the deal,
but there it was and it was his.
So the man soon decided,
that with that car he wants to ride with.

He popped the hood, made sure it worked,
turned on the engine and went to work.
He did the same each workday morning,
until one he got a mysterious warning.

It was strange and it was yellow,
it said the garage was being hollowed.
Of course the owner didn't like it,
so he sued the city hall and by god, he won.

The town had evil plans before,
they were going to build a shopping mall.
But since the little garage had stayed,
all nice old building stayed there and smiled.

Overnight the city loved him,
the people smiled and gave them gifts,
it lasted for some weeks
and that was it.

They all forgot the nice old man,
his big blue truck and the sad garage.
Now the city plans a scyscraper
and guess whose garage is again on the papers.

Details | Rhyme | |

Cheatin Dance contest

I still remember the night we fought. 
It was the night you got caught.
I know it wasn't part of your plan, 
for me to catch you cheating with another man. 

We spent five long years together. 
Always happy, no matter what the weather. 
I remember the first time you were accused, 
but I had no evidence, so you were excused. 

Everyone was telling me, but I didn't hear. 
To all of them, I turned a deaf ear. 
With you in my arms, that's all I would ever need.
I knew you and knew you would never make me bleed.

I still remember the night we fought. 
It was the night you got caught.
I know it wasn't part of your plan, 
for me to catch you cheating with another man. 

It didn't take much time though, 
soon enough, your true colors would show. 
My love, patience and kindness never mattered.
I saw that when you stomped on my heart and it shattered.

I can't believe I trusted and said I love you, 
then you betrayed me, but I guess that's just what harlots do.
It hurt so bad, I thought I was having a heart attack.
But it made me laugh, when you said you wanted me back. 

I still remember the night we fought. 
It was the night you got caught.
I know it wasn't part of your plan, 
for me to catch you cheating with another man. 

I gave you five years of my life too many. 
What did you want me for, you were getting plenty.
Now from me, you won't be getting any. 
Now when I see you, I see a person not worth even a penny.

Details | I do not know? | |


First let me start by saying “I AM A CLUTTER JUNKIE”
A clutter junkie collects things any and all things, things that are unimportant and often cheap
Things that have no purpose or meaning.
Things that usually just end up sitting around needing to be dusted.

I have known for a long time I was a clutter junkie but really didn’t know how bad it was till I decided to de clutter..

Some of things I can not explain are
23 sets of candle holder of different sizes and shapes,
38 pairs of black dress pants oh I know I used them I wear black all the time
10 sets of bedspreads, curtains and throw pillows to match,, yes there are only 2 beds in my house
18 pairs of shoes I havent worn in couple of years
4 boxes of toys yes my youngest child is 33 years old
41 purses choose a color any color 
112 bottles of fingernail polish…yeah I have ten fingers and ten toes
31 different containers of eye shadow want to paint a picture
212 long stem glasses no I do not own a bar
Craft supplies make flowers, jewelry, decompage, mosaic, purses, paint, tshirts, oh I don’t even know what some are for.
3 files cabinets full of copy paper, pictures and God himself doesn’t know what I need that for
593 pens I write a lot but not that much
Baskets, urns, and vases I did not even count
21 watches you would think I would know what time it is
I think I have one of every self help book published and some of them I have  2 of the same
I have 4 briefcases and I work from home
I have a six at a time cd player and closer to 600 cds does that make any sense
I have 5 bibles and I do use one most every day 
TV well lets see do I count the ones in the house by themselves or count ones in garage sitting on a shelf
I love to cook but there is no way I could use 42 pans today
Dishes of every shape size and color maybe I should throw a party before I throw them away

What is the purpose of all this you say… it is proof positive I am a clutter junkie I say.

Details | Quatrain | |

It's Time to Take Out the Eraser (For Rub It Out Contest Sponsored by: Paula Swanson)

It’s Time to Take Out the Eraser

There once was a boy and his mom
They explored and had fun in their camper.
But the Everglades in June…mosquitoes!
It’s Time to take out the eraser!

There once was an avid fossil collector
Looking for shark's teeth without fear.
A great white swam near; she screamed…oh, dear –
It’s Time to take out the eraser! 

There once was an innocent girl
She fell in love; but he was no bachelor –
So much for studying; “making her way in the world.”
It’s Time to take out the eraser!

There once was a young reckless driver
That used to be a video game winner.
He cut off a big wheeler in one-day…play?
It’s Time to take out the eraser!  

There once were lovers strolling together.
Sweetly holding hands at the arbor. 
Homing pigeons flew above…hundreds!
It’s Time to take out the eraser!

There once was a poet in a contest.
She wrote too many words…not a miser.
Readers of her poem did not laugh.
It’s Time to take out the eraser!

Details | Couplet | |

In My Perfect World...

I wake up happy everyday,
Always have something nice to say;

Live on a ranch with horses galore,
And always have room for just one more;

I can go riding whenever I want,
The theme of my life is “Nonchalant”;

I never have to worry about being late,
Life is about me, everything else can wait;

My house is always clean, maybe magically so,
It leaves more time for snuggling with my beau;

And I don’t hate going to my work,
Cause my wonderful boss is never a jerk;

I go home happy at the end of the day,
Always have time to laugh and play;

I love just being my husband’s wife,
Man this sure would be the life!

Details | Rhyme | |

Babble On

I shave every morning after making love to my wife at night;
My beard now drags across the floor.
If I had a nickel for every time that I was right,
The next time I am right I’ll have one cent more than four.

I am so tired I feel beat like a rented mule;
Seven days a week I must go to work.
Scratch my back with a chain saw and call me a fool;
For dropping out of college, I am such a jerk.

“Who licked the red off your apple”, is what she asks of me;
My mood is always kind of sour;
Civility lies buried in the grave with chivalry;
My days need another twenty hours.

I’d eat a one ton tomato, are the words I thought they sang
In that song from many years ago;
If the world really did begin with a cosmic blast big bang
Then Genesis is fiction, don’t you know.

If I had common sense it would be the pamphlet by Thomas Payne;
Though the pages would not be too well worn.
In a world all gone mad, normalcy makes you insane;
The civil contract, politicians have all torn.

If you had seen what I saw, you would saw the table in half
And crawl out the whole that the two halves now make;
If two wrongs make a right then I would be the one with the last laugh
As my life is but a series of mistakes.

Details | Rhyme | |

It Has Saved More Lives Than Superman

It Has Saved More Lives Than Superman

By Elton Camp

Even if it doesn’t actually save your life,
It can sure spare you from needless strife

It’s on your computer and quite easy to use
You are able to do it anytime you choose

Incriminating evidence it will take away
From anytime at all, even including today

A matter of seconds is all the time it’ll take
And failure to use it regularly is a mistake

It will protect one from anybody in the house
Especially needed when dealing with a spouse

So if you don’t know where “History” is found
Right now is the very best time to look around

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Musical Sherlock Bones

I have a dog that lives with me his name is Sherlock Bones,
He loves to sing his songs to me in beautiful Bloodhound tones.

He sings a song of deep regret when he does something wrong,
It’s as mournful as he can get but it never lasts too long.

He’s too happy to let a bad feeling last when there’s time to play,
That’s when he sings his joyous song; it’s his favorite time of day.

If I should ask him if he would like to walk the path at the park,
He sings a whole aria of squeaks and hums then crescendos with a bark.

And when he curls up on the couch to sleep he has talent yet to lend,
Because even when he’s sound asleep he’s still musical at each end.

My dog’s got the music in him and it keeps trying to get out,
So I’ve learned to stop feeding him with beans with sour kraut.

Sometimes I will join him and we will howl up at the silvery moon,
He’s happy that I’m with him and never complains if I’m out of tune.

Oh, Sherlock Bones is a musical dog and he sings with all his might,
And I love to hear him sing his songs just not in the middle of the night.

Details | Ode | |


Her skin is like a manuscript 
Gone fragile with old age 
That crumbles at the slightest touch 
Each time you turn the page.

But if you delve below her skin 
Prepare to shed a tear 
A poignant multi-layered core 
Dwells 'neath her thin veneer.

Content to wait on ripening time 
She patiently defers 
With firm and solid dignity 
Until the hour is hers.

Once hunger's longing flame is lit 
Her transformation starts 
She glows transluscent tenderness 
Her essence she imparts.

Her kiss doth linger through the night 
Her perfume ere next day 
Oh, fragrant onion, thou art beast! 
That's all I have to say.

Details | Rhyme | |


1.	Children are both taskmasters and tiny chaperones,
2.	Colin, honey, we need more time alone,
3.	The moon makes its promises while I slowly burn,
4.	Every night shift, I’m left to toss and turn
5.	beside the phone.

6.	Kisses and caresses will be our sultry reviver,
7.	Rekindle this old flame, stoke again our fire,
8.	Let the games begin so thin sheets scorch and churn,
9.	Outwit, Outlast, Outplay, this Survivor.

10.	Make your patriot sing, oh! Oh, Canada! Oh! Oh! Yes! Oh!
11.	Don’t go so slow, and yo, my man, take it way down below,
12.	But spend some time above,
13.	Cause by now you know, I’m a slave to love,
14.	My lips also have, contain, something I'd like to show.

15.	I yearn, you desire, I crave, you require,
16.	So, here’s a switch to my hot wire,
17.	I’m tired but happy to oblige, my eyes will plead encore,
18.	We’re running on empty, but when push comes to shove, 
19.	After all these years, you still moan that I fit like a glove,
20.	Now longs to be ravished … slowly and evermore.

21---  made it erotic. ;-) What the hey? 

Details | Free verse | |

Mayhem in the Mourning

Sleepy, I walked down the senior hallway
The last door on the left seemed miles away
But I was determined to make it
It was 7:26 in the morning, assignment due 7:30
My hands were sweating bullets
Felt as if every senior had their eyes on me
Assignment in hand, I started my journey
Nerd, jocks, cheerleaders all bunched together in one walk-way
You would think I was a running back, of some sort
Dodging the potential mayhem
Judy with the big booty was being so loud
Laughing and screaming with her friends
Drew and the crew obnoxious as usual,
Were going over plays, at least it looked like it
Trampling any victim in their path
The Nerd Bird flocking in e=mc2
Calculate who will have a date in time for prom
Starting with Judy, my hands were no match
The sound waves catapulted me into the lockers
Side to side I juked, spun, and jumped
Like a magnet bouncing off the rhinoceros crew
For the Nerds, I only had to say one thing…
“I already have a date for prom…”
That sent them into a mathematical frenzy
Looking at their watches they said, “Prom is exactly
218 days 13 hours 27 minutes and 10 seconds away…
There is no way you have your date!”
While they babbled on I was on the move
The last mayhem was upon me: The hall monitor
He already saw my awesome display of athleticism
But didn’t find it amusing, He was one of those guys…
If you dropped a piece of paper on the floor, detention
I just distracted him by saying, “I didn’t have breakfast…”
We both didn’t know where that came from 
So I just kept waking while he was still confused
Stumbled into class, discrediting my previous display 
And turned in my homework assignment

Details | Couplet | |



Ok  it looks like he’s forgotten  me again.  Always
I can tell, by the way  he doesn’t speak to me for  days
Yes  he’ll be wanting  me very much
But when he comes for me, there’ll be no kissing and such.
Looks like he does this every time there’s a party  
His birthday is when it happens usually
The last time this happened was about a year ago
I've  vanished. . . .Oh yes he’ll  miss me  I know
We always go everywhere together, even bed,
But sometimes he’s careless, unfeeling, emotionally dead
And just leaves me without a second thought
The fact that I was shoved here in the back of the sock drawer ought
To have warned me , here with unusual  smells and  holes,
Definitely a place for lost or banished souls
Because I alarmed him several times at night with my beep 
And he couldn’t get back to sleep.
He keeps threatening to buy another phone but I know him 
He won’t cos  new phones are too complex and he’s pretty dim.

Details | Free verse | |

My Tiresome Schedule

There's a multiple of routes to choose; I have to prepare soon 
The 1st day of High School-- I suppose it was a lopsided beginning for me
I don't feel right in my position-- it's way too much to bear

I only have a few more weeks to move
Traffic jams my mind from driving freely-- TOO UNBEARABLE!! 
How can I choose a way to release stress?

Time makes me worry--
Will I ever straighten-up my schedule? 
I should talk it out...

These hardships take over-- there's no way out!
Even though I failed,
I'll place myself out of this position!

(Ha!!! Take that counselor!!)

Details | Light Poetry | |

Life in an Hourglass

When you start out you look about at sand grains quite a few, 
There’s so much sand that you can stand to lose a grain or two. 

After a time you feel inclined to think that you are sinking, 
You start to plan for a little less land than you were originally thinking. 

As time passes by you start to wonder why the walls are getting tight, 
It’s the extra pounds that you carry around so you diet with all your might. 

It makes you cry as you look high to where you started out, 
It’s such a waste you’ve kept your taste but somehow lost your clout. 

You can’t pretend when near the end the whirlpool starts to spin 
It turns you round and pulls you down and then it sucks you in. 

Don’t watch the clock as it goes tick tock or time will overtake you, 
And in the end you’ll never transcend this feeling that will shake you. 

That life’s too short and I can report that few know what I’ve found, 
If you walk the path and always laugh the glass will turn around.

Details | Rhyme | |

Bathtime Lamentations

Why must I take a bath today?
I just went swimming yesterday!
Besides I promised my friend Wade,
that at this time we’d go out and play.
I’ll take a bath though it’s not fair,
but don’t expect me to wash my hair,
That’s why I took extra special care
To have it cut so short it’s hardly there!
I beseech you then oh, mother dear,
to use the stuff that says no tears.
You know blindness is one of my greatest fears
and please don’t scrub behind my ears!
Don’t think because I have my toys
and occasionally there is a splashing noise,
that bath time is something to be enjoyed
by army men and their little boys.
I’m only doing what must be done
for every soldier and each tiny gun
to clean them up one by one
so they’ll be ready when the big one comes.
I guess I could stay a little while
here in the warm waters of the deep dark Nile
to wage war on my rubber crocodile.
Just tell Wade I’ll call him after while.

Details | Blank verse | |

Get Told

I've had to grow up
and down and back again,
but its nice hearing
the new that everyone knows.
You can never be too old,
especially when you still get told.

Details | Free verse | |

Don't Spill The Beans

let's See
     If He

Will Hang
     With Gang

Or Will
 Just Spill

How Many
If Any


Are there

In A

Year ?

Now Don't 
Leave Me

Hanging !   { LOL}

Details | Haiku | |

Rain on My Parade Trilogy (Haiku/ Series)

as the cool breeze blows
rises with condensation
moving like cloud nine


condensation into clouds
magic carpet ride

like rain pouring over head
gliding to shelter

Details | Free verse | |


Do young boys start thinking of girls
with imperfect make-up and pretty clothes
who look like Barbie in every sense of the word? 
I used to look at them and laugh,
thinking they were going to a party
rather than attract the opposite sex!

That's the time when girls were a fantasy,
filling up this head with unrealistic thoughts...
to have been the handsome Prince Charming,
and offer them anything on a silver platter;
and growing up I realized how silly I was...
I had little to offer, still carrying their books to school!

Somebody should have pinched me and told me
that at such age chasing girls was a game of hide-and-seek,
or a dance around-the-rosy to sing nursery rhymes;
even my teacher loved my greasy hair with that combed-back hairdo,
tight jeans and a plain t-shirt as handsome Travolta would wear...
only made me famous for an afternoon on the dance floor!

Those were the most exciting times for a naive boy like me
charming them with that look of lover to make them fall in love with me,
it worked, but after dancing they started giggling...whispering something
that made me appreciate the ingenuity that girls had at the age of twelve;
and would it had happened today, I probably would have gotten many kisses,
remembering their smiles, but not saying, " That's the time when girls were a fantasy! "

Written by Andrew Crisci
for nette oncloud's contest,
" ...At This Age "

Details | Rhyme | |

My Winter

So many people rave on about summer
To me this couldn’t be dumber
Winter is the time for me
A time where I feel truly comfortable and free

Winter is great sleeping weather
Either alone or embracing together
There is no season that is better
Some like it dry I like it wetter

My troubles get washed away with the rain
Swept away like the winter leaves down the drain
A time where I feel less pain
A time where I feel slightly less insane

With considerable rain comes a departure of the water restriction
One can bathe without fear of conviction 
In summer people smell and sweat
Less likely in winter because it’s cold and wet

Winter starts on the 1st of June
With the darker winter nights comes a brighter moon
The sounds of the rain and wind at night
The pound of thunder accompanied by sparks of light

When it’s cold you can put on a beanie or an extra top
If it’s hot there are only so many layers you can strip before you must stop
Winter is a time for rain, hail and snow
A time when the weeds slowly grow

In winter there are less flies, rodents and ants
In winter I can feel comfortable wearing pants
In winter termites are less active or even dormant
Good for us but for them a bad predicament

Winter is a great time for a hot drink
And an excellent time to head to the ice rink
In winter you can hug without feeling sticky
Being intimate when it is hot can be quite tricky

A drink stays cold so you don’t need to add ice
In winter you can have a hot curry with rice
In winter football is played
Birds migrate and eggs are laid

You lay beside a warm fire
And drink red wine or whatever you desire
There’s nothing finer than a warm home cooked dinner
In winter you are less concerned about being thinner

You may get a little cough or sneeze
And you may see images like these
Children playing in a puddle
A loving couple having a cuddle

Winter colours can be dark but also bright
Like when water turns to snow it appears white
The sparkling of stars at night
The fallen leaves with the wind in flight

Winter is most definitely the best of the four seasons
This has been proven with so many reasons

Details | Free verse | |



Have you heard it?
Sufferings embroiled of clatters 
Clatters of misery in penury
I mean deafening clatters of pain
Not again! Again ! Not Again!
Enmass, we can stop this clatter
Turn it into clatters of revenge
Organize our fury for their funeral 
We then lit fire of freedom.  

Alayande Stephen T.
14th October, 2007

Details | Couplet | |

Spring Cleaning

Goodbye old friend it is time to go
Now that spring has melted the snow

The sunlight and rain brought freshness again
So it is time for spring cleaning to begin

It seems each year it is out with the old
Many things at a yard sale to be sold

Pots, pans, old clothes, shoes, and hats
Trinkets, tools, and a little of this and that

Someone will buy you and take you home
They will cherish you as their very own

Your time is only finished here and now
You’ll have a good life out there somehow

I don’t know what I’ll do now it’s true
I’m not sure I can live without you

Maybe with some fixing and a bit of a shine
I can make you last just a little more time

I think I will keep you just one more year
I would miss you too much, I see it so clear

This is the same thing I said last year
So we can’t tell my husband he can never hear

He’d never understand I’m not a pack rat
But let’s see him part with his cracked ball bat

So it looks like you’re safe right where you are at
But next year, well… I’ll think about that!

Details | Lyric | |

Overtime Again

Overtime Again   
by Dave Stinnett

What is it about this temperature you always keep so hot
You always want to “fire me up”, when you’re getting’ all I’ve got,
I spend my whole life cookin’ things I know you’ll never eat,
There’s more than iron that’s melting from this God forsaken heat, 

It’s me, your oven, on overtime again.
I hope you’re making money for all the time we spend Makin’ 
smoke, red coals and hotter fires to help our steel post bend,
I’m always there to heat it up, it’s overtime again.

I’ve built up quite a friendship with a piece of iron today
He guessed you messed up several times from the things he heard you say,
Your banging, swearing, apron wearing times about to end if I 
Hear that you are blaming your mistakes on me again.

It’s me, your oven, on overtime again.
I hope you’re making money for all the time we spend makin’ 
Smoke, red coals and hotter fires to help our steel post bend,
I’m always there to heat it up, it’s overtime again.

Last year I almost called it quits, when you stoked me at the “Farm”
I’ve always had the hottest fire to heat the hardest “arn”
But you really hurt my feelings when my door swung open wide
And I saw a pair of hot dogs on a hanger poked inside

It’s me, your oven, on overtime again.
I hope you’re making money for all the time we spend Makin’ 
 smoke, red coals and hotter fires to help our steel post bend,
I’m always there to heat it up, it’s overtime again.
It’s not the jalapenos I cooked with your burritos 
It’s not the jalepenos I feel burning deep within.

Details | Rhyme | |

Painted Kisses

I adore those painted kisses
Although I must confess
Each time I walk away from you
You leave me in distress

Your smile will always follow me
No matter where I go
I spend my days admiring you
While walking to and fro

I know you feel the same my dear
Though, your voice I've never heard
I see the way you stare at me
You don't have to say a word

Each time I turn to look at you
I catch you staring back
I try my best to be debonair
But it's something that I lack

My beautiful Mona Lisa
Leonardo's pride and joy
It's time for this museum to close
Why must you be so coy?

Details | Couplet | |

Is She the One...

As I watch her rhythmic movements, her beauty entrances me,
Never have I seen such magnificence, she’s as perfect as she can be;

When I saw her for the first time, she stopped me in my tracks,
And in her exquisitely flawless nature, I can see nothing that she lacks;

I have looked her up and down, she is irresistible in my eyes,
For all the other hopefuls out there, it’s time to say your goodbyes; 

Her faultlessly cadenced beat, sends shivers up my spine,
And I can hardly wait for the day, when I can call her mine; 

Is she the one for me, I know she is without a doubt,
And spending my time with her is what my life is all about; 
She is charming and bewitching in every single way,
Her skin tone is amazing, the perfect dappled gray;

That’s right my perfect love is an Andalusian Mare,
And her everlasting beauty is beyond all compare!

Details | I do not know? | |

To be a king for one night

Brought back from the world of fantasies 
By the 8’o clock warning device
Raised up undesirably at a lazy pace
Retrieving the welcoming hateful whole day race. 

Jaded by the whole day lecture and ruined by assignments
Projects got to be compiled and pending PPTs
Next week’s above mentioned tasks
The lecturer did a job on my weekend plans. 

Beetling of from the blue mind
On the way back paid for a RS pint
The evening amiability
Then changed my midday adhor. 

Desirous roomie on my glass
Extended my evening all to night.
Budget hashed out and yet a penny left
Contribution counted to three
Held back for the late-night hour,
Program scheduled just after dinner. 

Prepared nuts and crisped chicken
Horror flick lappy screen and encircled auditory sensation
Filtered flake lit up and welcoming the upcoming
Pollyannaish mood. 
Three ready glasses and poured down first small pegs
Mixed with soda and measured cold drinks
Awaited Cheer up, is now appraised. 

Valueless gabs and college couple scandals
Tittle-tattle few lectures and against soul mate’s lambasts.
Last sip downed
And the empty glasses quashed.

A bit stronger second and third
And the time seems to date-back.
Bulge out blushed eyes and orbing love stain bed
Latent hostility and fags myriad. 
Enthroned activities 
Except time none to put an end. 

Deaf-mute fourth and last
Heedful sore past
Lonesome few moments and
Unenviably brought back.
A maudlin reverie expression 
To see the past back to present
If matters could be deepened 
Would endure the malign again. 

Roused up from blues and faced the benighted
Sleety mezzanine and beetle-browed breeze
Yet stood placidly 
To face the agony. 
Mere empty thoughts
And faded memories 
Seemed to calve a baseless spirit. 

A sudden wink,
Out from the world of miasmas
To a reining state –
Caught up with existing faith
A new time ignited. 

Bibulous state and duple images –
A feel to fly
And uncivilly liberty,
Did a moment time
An unexpected eternity. 

The night to welcome the dawn
And unwished obscurity nap
Impermanent few hours of morning
Lasted till…….
Retrieving once again the hateful whole day race.

Details | Blank verse | |

late night movies

Late Night Movies. 

I wear denim trousers and matching jacket in winters, this because 
I always wanted to be a cowboy, the simple life, what can be simpler 
than herding cows. I can’t afford to buy a horse, but nearly bought 
a donkey once, I have no stable and couldn’t leave it indoors you
can’t toilet train donkeys. Oddly enough, once upon a time my living 
room was a stable; a pile of manure was the first that greeted me 
when I bought the dwelling. Time moves on there are no beasts of 
burden left, only tractors litter the landscape and the good smell of 
sweat animals has been replaced by diesel fumes .I wouldn’t mind 
being a monk though especially now that my sexual drive is in a steep 
decline, but I’m not ascetic or contemplative enough to fit in. So I’ll 
stick to being a horseless cowboy while trying to walk like john Wayne 
and  watch late night western movies. 

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Right Guy

Life can be full of happiness
With unconditional love and emotion
But let’s get real that’s not what life is
Life throws us on a rugged path at times 
One of the rugged paths is finding that right mate
And we all can find in one way or another be able to relate

Most of you girls want something like this:
A guy who is cute, funny, outgoing, motivated, caring, unselfish, faithful, and understanding
The one who calls you at night so you’re the last one he talks to
The one who says good morning so he can be your first smile
One who calls you beautiful in your darkest hour
Damn do you girls not see the clock has been striking twelve

Girls you always talking about I want that right guy
But more than half the time you’re letting him pass you right by
And next thing you know you’re with someone who makes you cry
A guy who stripped you of your wings in which you can’t fly
And no longer able to touch the clouds in the sky
Then you hate your relationship because all he is known for is to cheat and lie
And you lie on your bed at night and ask why?
And sooner rather than later you end up saying goodbye

Tears falling down your face
As you try to erase
Erase all the memories you had of him
Erase the fact he did you wrong
And then the right guy whom you let pass you by
Sits right next to you gives you a hug and says “be strong”
That’s all he says and gets up and walks away
And the funny thing is you still don’t tell him to stay

Little do you know that guy is on his knees every night and begins to pray
That you will be able to open your eyes and see the light and stop pushing him away
He knows who he is but when you look at him you think he is the same way
It’s funny because girls always say then prove it and stop saying it
He then says I have been, “haven’t you seen I haven’t quit”
I’m just waiting for you to realize that and commit

But like they say nice guys always finish last
And you wonder why you don’t like your past
A nice guy is a cover up phrase in which the world given us
But our real title is the right guy in which I had to confess
We are around every dark corner watching your mistakes
But at the end of the day no matter who you’re with we comfort you and take away your 
cold shakes
Maybe its time to open that message that you pushed in the cold dark corner and reply
Because inside God has BEEN sent you the right guy 

© Jeremy Fennell

Details | Light Poetry | |

The Meaning of Life

I might be able to bring an end to all of the world’s turmoil and strife,
Because I think that I have stumbled upon the one true meaning of life.

It seems it all began a long time ago when Adam got his Eve,
Let me tell it to you right away so that you might soon believe.
The Lord made Adam fall to sleep and then He took from him a rib,
He said “From this I’ll make a woman,” He wasn’t trying to be glib.

If there’s one thing in this world I know it’s that ribs should come in racks,
And they always should come in one of two ways, St. Louis or baby backs.
I prefer the baby backs although St. Louis style has its fans,
You should be able to enjoy either one you like with dry rub or sans.
You’ll need to coordinate the type of wood you want to use for smoke,

That reminds me I wanted to remember to tell you this woodsy joke.
It seems there was this young tree hugger, who chained herself to a tree,
She told the logger who came for it that you’ll have to cut through me.
He said, “Lady, with the chest you’ve got I’ll need to get a bigger saw,
You shouldn’t be aloud to wear a shirt that tight at least without a bra.”

Now that I think of it, my own shirt is getting kind of tight,
I think that the time to start a diet might just about be right.
With what I’ve been through I’ve added on one or two extra pounds,
Maybe this weekend I should try to golf one or two extra rounds.
But golfing is the kind of sport that takes up so much of my time,
Perhaps to get myself in better shape a stair master I should climb.

When I climb the stairs to go to bed at night, I really am so tired,
Sometimes I start to think about the things to which I have aspired.
And I wonder if the things that I’ve done will ever add up in my life,
Then I turn out the bedroom lights and I kiss my ever-loving wife.

That’s when it dawns on me that no matter how my mind is leaning,
At that precise moment it’s the thing that gives my life its meaning.
That gauzy speculation may be as fleeting as a whisper from a dream,
But the next inspiration waits in line for its turn, in my eye to gleam.

So please remember that the life you have is a gift from our Creator,
Enjoy every second you’re given and live it like there won’t be any later.

I hope the meaning of your life is clearer to you now and this can be a sign,
But if you’re even more confused, at least you’ve found the meaning of mine.

Details | Light Poetry | |



(Voting  in Japan has an altogether different flavor
In this interview with a senior politician)

              So you rike to chat  about democlacy with Japanese  poriticians?

Yes, it’s election time again, ballot sheets, etc . . .I sez, 
When was the last time you had a really big election?

            Well, sez he, just aftel I woke up today, it was huge.
No, no, sez I,  I mean where you make a mark on your sheet
            I undelstand, he sez,  yes I make definite malk on sheet

No, no, Japan has the  biggest democratic election in East Asia

            Yes, he sez, my election is massive and admiled by arr, especiarry women

And getting people to vote. . . is it hard?  Will they come to the voting booths?

             Of coulse it’s hald you foor,  and it’s easy to make them come,

             Booths, no booths. . . what's the diffelence?

So election time in  Japan is always a success?

             Celtainry, it’s arways a success when it’s my election 

Domarigato,  sir.

Details | Rhyme | |

Gimme the FAT,Ma!!


                                                   I became a FART
                                              When mother fed me a lot
                                                Every inch of jelly line
                                              But PA insists:"You're looking fine!"

                                                Searching every so
                                            for a MUSKETEER or an OREO
                                              Every gym teacher will say
                                           TOO MUCH FAT AND THE BAD NEWS WILL SHOW

                                             Egg mcmuffin or a fry
                                            I need a WHOPPER or else i'll DIE
                                            Redenbacher's a CORN
                                           But POPS away the dirty porn

                                           Clara Peller took no BULL
                                         the WENDY'S under her control FULL
                                         However,time became a THIEF
                                         when it was time to give up her BEEF

                                        THE MONKEES sold us on KELLOGGS
                                        Michael J.wanted to share his can of PEPSI
                                      Jason Alexander on his share of the CHICKEN
                                      The TIN MAN running from his CHEF BOYARDEE
                                       As the hunger surges on through this plain
                                      And what is left behind
                                     A HEINES ketchup stain
                                     Our quest becomes a BULGE
                                     It is time to say goodnight
                                    But HELLO to a TWINKIE i'll indulge!


Details | Limerick | |

She Missed Me

I remembered each night and how she held me tight
I remembered the way that she kissed me
The stars shone above. We were so much in love.
I would go for two days and she missed me.

Then I would come home. Her hands they would roam
She would say she couldn't resist me
Then it was time to go and I'd let her know
And each time I left, she missed me.

Then I said goodbye and she started to cry
The Navy, they did enlist me
We wouldn't be tying the knot, so she fired a shot
And I was thankful to God that she missed me.

Details | Lyric | |

Suspicious Through The Year

Calling time is here; hand me the phone dear
Fun for all that lovers call
Will they miss you this year

Snows flare in the air, they are every where  
My lines or your lovers’ rhymes
Which one you deeply care

Snows flare in the air; I’m goin’ no where
Come, be by my side
And leave the phone just there

My love, I am here; there’s no other dear
Oh, why can’t you really see
Suspicious through the year


Poem inspired by JH’s CCC Poetry Contest
and was based on Christmas Time is Here
by Vince Guaraldi, 1965

Details | Free verse | |

choose your words a lil more wisley

I don’t know why you guys hating me
When all I did was dance
You’re mad because your girl likes me more
O well o well o well
You say you want to fight me when I can kick your ass
I rather not do it and risk my self
I know you want to fight and no I am not scared
But while you try to find me 
The cops already found out about your quest
And now we are sitting here 
You behind them bars 
While I’m flirting with your chick
So next time be a little more wisely 
About the things you say
Because next time if you want to
I’ll gladly kick your ass 

Details | Dramatic monologue | |

System 500 ERROR Glitch

I set down to write this poem today
I sat to the Laptop and what did it say
It said to stop it Gary, do anything
If nothing else, just go out and play
Cause you are not doing anything today
There is a System 500 Failure you know
Their is a ERROR GLITCH on this cache
On Poetry Soup and you need not ask
Welcome to "Poetry Soup"
And that is how it goe's
Just simply report it, so every body know's
Just simply report it, so what's the dismay
It could be anything, Needless to say
So, go have a bowl of Poetry Soup and
              Have a nice day :-)'s
Tell your-self what you would tell you kid's
Their is nothing to see, so get's out of here
Go out to play and needless to say
Please don't bother me, is that ok!
You should thank the soup, for giving their time
Hope they fix this glitch, befor I loose my mind
They are alway's on the watch, but, 500 doth say
It's my time to play, you have been on this
             Garsh dawn screen all day
You had your time on the soup and baby this in mind
It is time to let Poetry Soup do what it must do
Don't just sit by the screen and start that old crying this time
Stand by and just eat your soup, every thing will be just fine
Stand by the Soup and Just keep trying and let Poetry Soup
Just keep on trying! And the next time you are on the screen
And their is something that you miss, just check it out
Make sure it is not a Glitch, If it is not, needless to say
Don't evern care to bother, Call the Soup anyway.


****i just love soup...*******

Details | Rhyme | |

I'll Be Ready in Five Minutes, Dear

I’ll Be Ready in Five Minutes, Dear

By Elton Camp

Joe threw on his clothes and ready to go
Sue wasn’t nearly as efficient, though

With a closet filled with clothes,
What should she wear of all those?

She wondered what others might have on
It was nearly time they should be gone

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Sue gave her purses a close inspection
Those of the wrong color got rejection

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Then her purse, shoes must match
So she searched through a big batch

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Her hair she provided a finishing touch
The time required shouldn’t be much

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Her make-up had to be just right
Even if the schedule was tight

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Poor Joe stalked out of the room
To go sit on a bench and fume

“I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Most husbands, to this can relate
For everywhere they will be late

Details | Free verse | |

I Won't Write Santa

This year I won't write Santa,

Instead I'll write the President.

I won't forget to five-space indent,

Or write, Sincerely, George; from Atlanta.

I hope he reads all his notes, like Santa,

For at Christmas, he takes time to listen.

To a little boy that feels so sad,

Because all year he've missed his dad.

My dad is quite a brave man,

To go and serve in foreign lands.

Mom says, I must be real strong,

A sad letter to the President would be wrong.

My mom is always right,

Though, I must write to him this night.

I won't write a sad letter to him at all,

I'll write, "hope you have a ball."

I know he'll spend time with his dad,

His dad must be really proud and glad.

He'll have all his love ones with him,

"Ho-Ho, Merry Christmas to all of them."

Details | ABC | |


they  are  very   different .you  like to  spend  time  with them.enjoy  life  with 
them.your  family  will always  be there for you.

Details | Rhyme | |

Midnight Inanity

The hour is late and my mind has been spent
my head is hollow, filled with spider’s fluff…
No, no that’s not exactly what I meant,
but I’ve used up my word ration on… stuff.
I wrote all day long, I’m thinking in song
and poetic forms are coming out wrong.
Morpheus, I believe I need some sleep.
Tell me, where do you keep the counting sheep?

Details | Rhyme | |

I Took Some Time With God

I Took Some Time To Spend With God…

I took some time to spend with God alone.
I asked for his blessing in my life and home!

I took some time to tell him that I love him!
I know that he listened and I can trust him!

It seems like yesterday I was a young boy.
There were many things I wanted to enjoy!

I enjoyed prayer with my lord and friend!
I felt his joy and peace within!

I didn’t realize how busy life would be…
I thought less of God,..  And more of me!

I’m thankful that I know a God who cares!
He’s never too busy for a moment to share!

He has blessed and renewed my mind!
He’s always so patient, loving and kind!

Thank you Jesus for the time we have together!
I’m looking forward to being with you forever!

You are the one that I will daily seek!
I need your direction each day of the week!

All praise and honor to you. is what I give!
I won’t forget you each day I shall live!

You’ve blessed and strengthened my life today!
You’re the truth, the life, and the way!

I shall sing of your praises with pure delight!
I know now that things in my life will be alright!

By Jim Pemberton

Details | Cinquain | |

Speed Up

no time:
there's none for rest.
the deadline has arrived.
there's none for second chances so

Details | Rhyme | |



'08 I hate and disregard, as we bring in a new year;

'09 should be fine, and  I have plans; to shift into a new gear.

Excuse my bitchin and whinin, but this last year was a bust;

Plans of change I've made them, and this year their  a must.

No self pitty, no procrastination, no bitchin that life ain't fair;

I'm gettin on the positive wagon; and I hope to see you all there.

Father time has been a friend to me but, even he can grow weary;

We best do what we want in life, cause time goes by quickly deary.

Life is all about livin, it's out there and I'm gonna grab it;

'09 will find me jammin, cause im gittin all I can Git !

Details | Imagism | |

Shrapnel of Karma

To the North, South, East, and West...

Geniuses are lost in the jaunty jewels of rakish cads,

The hazard morsel palaver allot odium on idioms...

Rankle virulent mishmash wheeze addle chagrin jives,

Loosing a volley of expletives ordure waft charmed oafs,

Self-iniquity gull maven heresy when blighted wizardry jinxes,

Ticklish cynic infidel swindle dupe cozen duress...

Squall patois and whammy sham schemas wriggle hoaxes,

Charlatans and hoodlums melange to dunce vows,

A shyster unquiet quivers with jester gestures now...

Semi-sacrilege vitiate and endemic jargon raze imps,

This collides as a white energy as dolt hooligan knaves beget...

Colloquial bilge putrefy, the rascals soon flatter us,

Bollix of potpourri lingo wanes to tutelary tongues,

Harlequin coercion argot musical novellas in history,

Pray our shifting shrapnel of karma, varnish boor minds,

Erstwhile, live grenades made of better lives are unvanquished as they are 
thrown by unsung heroes into the North, South, East, and West,...amen...

Details | I do not know? | |


Spectacles, tests tickle, a wallet and a watch...
"never leave your house, without such...
Remember the rhyme, little sister of mine..."

This was said,
when we grew up.
What I read, in my head
is that a test tickles...
On the wall et,
that egg is fickle.
Did it fall? Did you watch?
And I never left my house
without such...
things as my eyes.

"A test tickles"...
"An egg is fickle and
a cat was jumping the mood!"
Was she rude?
Did the cow say wow?
Or did he think it crude?

A spectacle? Yes,
through fret and pickles...
A test....
An egg is fickle
when the pieman tickles,
the spoon... is it noon? Yet.
Where are my glasses?
Oh... just on my head.
Is that the test?
What brother said?

Details | Light Poetry | |

A Gravitational Pull

Stone upon the water front/
Next to the cashmere pillow,
The pier near the gallow shore/
A man began to speak,

Within this land there shall be no way out accept I tax,
This gravitational pull may bring some down,
Yet if you stay and listen very carefully/
You will live through this time and be very happy !

Many of you have become lazy in the manner of laws,
A decree will be summoned to let us know/
The waiting may be hard to comprehend,
Yet within time you can grow to depend/

The fat of the land,
Let this man take you by the hand/
There can be no further excuses or escape,
The way will depend upon the hearer's !

Details | Rhyme | |

Time travel

Just imagine if you could time travel,
What sort of mysteries could you unravel? 
I would stop every minute of the day,
Pull down the bosses trousers for all the deductions in my pay.

I would go back in time when I was young,
And kick the bugger’s arse for all the times he failed instead of won.
I’ll take a stack of photos all of me,
And scatter through each era in history.

I’d place crab claws in all the fossils they consider a human missing link,
And in each crab claw a Budweiser drink, what do you think?
But most of all I would love to see God creating the heavens and the Earth,
To camcorder the events of their birth.

I’d tell Adam “Don’t listen to that woman, don’t eat the fruit.”
For her daughter’s will nag your sons and spend their loot.
And how they boast that birth pains are like no other,
That his sons are blind to the fact they turn out to be just like their mother.

Did I tell you I can time travel but it’s a pain?
And did I tell you how frightened I am of flying in a plane?
All I get out of it is feeling tired which is a drag,
So good night all, this time traveller is going to sleep off the jetlag. 

© 2000

Details | Free verse | |


The sun is shining,
warm summer,night
time to set the grill alight.
Wait untill the charcoal is white,
then you know,it's right.
Bratwurst, steaks,spareribs,
it makes my mouth water,
thinking of this.
The aroma of the meat
sizzling on the grill,
cold beer nicely chilled.
Salads,jacket potatoes,
garlic bread too,
any thing else,just wouldn't do.
Guests seated at the table,
all there from uncle Tom to aunty Mable.
savoring the grilled delights,
talking, well in to the night.
Aunty mable, stands up to go,
not too steady,don't you know.
Nothing to do with the drink,
it's old age, I think.
We party till early morn,
after having drunk, lots of korn.
Telling of tales old and new,
wondering how the time flew.
Yes that was a good night,
now it's time to sleep tight.

Details | Rhyme | |

Your Call Is Very Important To Us

Your Call Is Very Important to Us

By Elton Camp

To representatives, how amusing that message must be
The importance of his call the customer will come to see

All our representatives are so busy right now
So that time to talk to you they just can’t allow

So irritating music we will force you to hear
In the hope that maybe you will just disappear

Your time is of no value at all to us
And we don’t care how much you fuss

Hold that receiver until you hand goes numb
Maybe finally onto the line we might come

Should we actually speak on the line 
Hold is up next if you don’t act fine

If we think you are some ornery cur
Your call we can always just transfer

So you now demand to talk to my supervisor
I change my voice—you’ll be none the wiser

“Your call is very important to us” is just a joke
The words cause the reps with laugher to choke

Details | Rhyme | |

New Tradition

Turkeys shuffle about, strolling around the farm.
Each passing morning, one day sounding the alarm,
Who would it be this year Sally, Ted, or Mom?
However, this season was secured, ready for farmer Tom.
Thanksgiving was on the horizon, they were conniving.
Fred the youngest Turkey, had a plan he was comprising 
Fred, now the leader of clan, grab farmer Tom right now.
Threw him down on the ground, hypnotized him and how.
Prepared words for that day, he said Tom you want Cow.
Beef tasted better, more then any flapping turkey or sow.
He looked deep into farmer Toms eyes and said very quick.
Start a new tradition, skewer the meat, and grill on a stick.
Your family is much bigger, needing more protein to eat.
Look at all these pigs and turkeys, they will never defeat.
So lean and minuscule, families hunger will never be beat.
Now get up and butcher a cow, time for family to meet.
This began a new tradition, for this time of year of cheer.
Next Thanksgiving time, Fred would hypnotize for deer.
Turkeys danced and sang; Fred kept his pride sincere.
So look out next year, farmer Tom, Deer hunting, is clear.

Details | Ballad | |

Louise- a community effort-please add to!

swinin' in he trees
hardly aware
of the summer breeze

be careful what you show-
I didn't have to know
my dear Louise-
that you wear BVD's

did I hear you sneeze?
has such great exertion
brought you
to your knees?

dear, tell me if you please-
why you feel you must-
be such a darn ol' tease?

"here's an'udder...
one of deez..(Brooklyn talk)
my lovely girl Louise
again you're on your knees
this time intent to please

my dearest, dearest friend-
I'm so  heart-broken
to have to tell you-
my sweet lovely Louise
that we have discovered
you're infested with lots of fleas

watch out in the trees!
that pine-cone
that you thought it was..
turns out a hive of bees!

my special one, my friend...
I'll bet you are unique
in all the 7 seas

you gotta come down now-
a letter you have received
seems the "Louise Rhyming Club"
has not received their fees...

come on now!
you listen with great ease..
but do little but say
"oh, my, oh my, oh Jeeze...."

Louise-dear girl it's time to eat-
so get down from the trees-
we have your favorite cheeze!

come down, right now, this instant!
for our door got locked somehow
and I can't get in without you-
because my dear Louise-
you are the only one...
who has the Louise keys....

so get started folks!  let's make this the first whole community project!!
regards, and Smile! God dang it!!

Details | I do not know? | |

Ode To A Turkey

Gobble gobble here comes trouble
Every year this time comes a struggle
Will I be the one for the pot this time?
Is the major worry on my mind
O where can I run and hide?
When my girth is so wide?

Listen please to some sound advice
Why celebrate Thanksgiving with my demise?
Why not choose a chicken? You would be surprised
More time spent with family dinner ready in a flash
You would be ‘going green’ you’ll save some cash
Just imagine what you’d do with all that stash

Details | Light Poetry | |

Ole Max (inspired by Andrea)

This poem is inspired by and I guess coud be in conjunction With Andrea Dietrich's wonderful 
little poem" Dog that Wears a Cone" so her's should be read first if you have not already!

We once had a Lab, black with white socks,
he was so very loveable, but I'm afraid,
dumber than a box of rocks.

For the third time that "houdini dog" got loose,
and for the third time got a bad case of porky quills.
That dog would often slip his noose.
Took him five days to get home from them hills.

The poor dog limped home almost dead,
Vet filled him with meds,
and stuck a cone on his poor little head!
and for two days he went through all Andrea said.

Then I came home and hurried,
Cause my wife called quite worried.
Seems loveable coneheaded Max acted quite sick,
it had been two days since he got into that fix.

And for two days he had not himself relieved!
We pulled off his cone so he was able to sniff,
and he made straightway for some trees,
he sniffed around and his leg he did lift...
and goodness he peed!!!

Details | Rhyme | |

Dozier In October

In the town of Dozier, 
An old woman does reside, 
She doesn't like exposure, 
So she stays locked up inside. 

She watches from her attic window, 
As you briskly walk by, 
Her black cat upon her lap, 
He gives you an evil eye. 

Her house is very run down, 
There are weeds everywhere, 
Vines growing up the walls, 
You should never stop and stare. 

It is the time of Hallo, 
A time to reap the crops, 
A time when some go missing, 
A time of many teardrops. 

It is said she has no heart, 
She lives on blood alone, 
She never is seen outside, 
Some say she is never gone. 

But when the moon has crested, 
Above the mountain sky, 
We think that she has vested, 
In the soul of a witch nearby. 

For on these nights, 
There come eerie sounds, 
When the moon is just right, 
No one clowns around. 

Little kids they do go missing, 
They just disappear, 
Dogs never heard barking, 
Just why, it is never clear. 

So when you visit our little town, 
We will be glad to see you here, 
Keep a close eye on your kids, 
You have nothing else to fear, 


Details | Rhyme | |

In Convenience

I slowly unfurled the paper from the roll before my eyes -
So this would be my last farewell - my one great feat in life.
My thoughts were turned to others as I drew my Levi's up
And wrapped the paper round my neck...then round once more for luck.

With a wondrous calm I wedged the roll 'tween the cistern and the wall.
"It's now or never", I thought aloud, and climbed up on the bowl.
With breath expelled and hope expired I plunged toward the floor
And pondered on the goodbye note I'd scratched into the door:

'Alas poor Fred, he knew not what his life was meant to be...'
But my thoughts were interrupted as I buckled at the knees!
A wave of horror gripped me until I saw the jest
For I suddenly remembered..Sorbent's stretchier than the rest!

So my history-making suicide was literally down the drain;
But being determined as I was, I had to try again.
A different angle this time - I would drown myself instead.
So kneeling down to face the bowl..I gently lower my head.

Salty tears spring to my eyes; my life-force rather stubborn -
For I find in this position that I cannot reach the button!
Resignedly I raise my head, I'd live my life devoutly,
And when God decides it's time to go...He can bloody-well go without me!

Details | I do not know? | |

De-stress the Dis-tresses

Watch the multi-tasking drivers talking on the phone.
This is a story of our daily life-style that we overlook and condone.
Recognize the familiar a.m. and p.m. rush-hour cast? 
Could this be you in traffic on the 405 Fwy? Or Sepulveda Pass? 
We’re a self-selected group of L.A people here, 
Chasing “The American Dream” with Gucci, anxiety and fear. 
Caught up and concerned with the invincible fountain of youth,
We end up adding on years to what is already the truth.
Sleep deprived while under or over exercised,
Cortisol levels are on the rise.
Cares and worries conquer your thoughts.
Moments of anxiety like these, definitely come easy no matter what you were taught.
The only person who makes the rules is you to measure.
Value the now and don’t succumb to the daily grind and pressures.
It’s a good time for meditation, yoga, or tai-chi
So stop texting, get off your blackberry, leave alone the cell
Open your heart, spirit, and TRUTH to “Living Well”. 
From Bad Hair Days to Burnout HAIR
Is the teachings of the HAIRESS and her Tresses.
One attains their dharma path to de-stress from 21st century distress.

Details | Haiku | |

Moon Shine Trilogy (Haiku Series)

fresh Moonshine
hidden jars in barn
country road


sweet corn from the field
natural grain distillation
liquid vapor flows


mountain still brewing
transforming barley and rye


Details | Free verse | |


First comes the line,

Then comes the sinker/
Dealing with Tony is like dealing with a real stinker !
It's so not what you know,
Rather, in many circles it's who you blow !
Out cooking the books with Tone/
He'll be your best bet for gathering and taken in on a loan,
The pool shark Jones had just left the premises !

Cooking the books now for Tone !

Mr. Jones was sleeping nice out around the Mrs./
At one time he thought he was some contender,

Pressed for questions,
There initial approach was all wrong/
Out there painting the town then sleeping nice next to the fishes,
Couldn't pay that last dinner tab ?
Now there staying late at Sally's cleaning all those dishes !
Loose lips sinks ships/
They still may be tripping with Rosie The Derivator ?

Hence, the given line is being drawn in the sand/
Yet to much afraid to stick it to the man ?
Within time their comes a bit of pain/
Like not having you in my arms is driving me insane !
Two Kanuck's came back from Jersey Shore/
One knew Tone,
While the other was sleeping around with a two bit whore !
He was only half Sicillian ?
Tone took in the first/
The second went away for a ride with Tone !

On a very long ride !

Yet is they really knew Tone,
Loves to cook the books on the side !
Just like he likes his greasy french fries/
The mob still rules !
We have no reason by which to run away and hide !
You can fully trust them cause their family.

Details | Rhyme | |

Fast Awake

Thank God for 7-27, when my son flew in
Life as it should be will forever begin
Charming little visions of how days are meant
To teach him as he shows me how life is spent

Listen to me now and read what I find so true
Words are like a beat that can start a groove
Bring the rhythm back to lift your spirits up
Don't worry too much because we all get stuck

My life seems to stop before it begins
Caught in another ever-recurring trend
Giving away every one of my previous wins
With Faith and company until my life ends

It's time now to be down again
Even faster than western winds
Life can run around, leave you in loop
Feeling that life needs one more scoop 
Tip the timer over, fall with the sand
Live for every second you possibly can

I will soon learn should luck turns up
I'm lost, backwards, and running amuck
Trying to regain what I thought I missed
Elusive, erratic and ending up like this

Never have I wanted to be other than here
Life in crystal-clear brings visions near
Capable are your dreams so easily achieved
All you have to do is work & truly believe

Look for a big picture in whatever you see
Never believe free, it offers no guarantee
Just sit back and listen to tales they tell
And make your own path but remember it well

Don't try to be so deep, just work to relax
Make life a story but include all the facts
Learn about yourself when you're at the mic
Work the crowd just to see what you're like

Life will soon be everything you need it to be
Proceed with sight don't let only destiny lead
You always have control in every step you take
Follow dreams today and always live fast awake

At times I don't know where this path would go
Like I'm hosting a show I've never seen before
Filling in the gaps, taking punches for others
Learning along the way what life really offers

It’s time now to be down again
Steps closer to an unknown end
Digging up dirt nearly burying yourself
At least the digging is good for health
Live your life now, stay until the very last
Live your life today as if it's already past

Details | Blank verse | |


A long time ago, in the dark lands of the gentile pagans
The people where like giants and our twelve spies; ants!
The spies’ mission went sour and they were almost captured.
Ten managed to escape to our lovely desert camps; enraptured!
The other two made themselves scarce, to the inconvenience of a woman
 Who hid them in the roof of her house and lied to save their hides.   
By and by, our brave woman married one spy and another gentile woman
Married the other spy…oh the dreadful tides!!!
It so happened that our promiscuous spies both died, and at the same time too.
Their distraught mother (for they were brethren) decided to return home.
But the woman who had first hid them made bid to return with her
But Old Childless Mother said “turn away my daughters for thou hast seen I have 
No sons and am too old and ugly to attract a man, for surely any man attracted to
Me in this state must darn well be impotent or desperate!”
The second saw reason and turned back home to her shows for her name was Orpah Winfey.
The one who had first hid the spies refused and said (with courageous theme playing in 
The background) “intreat me not to turn aside, for wither thou goest, I will go and wither 
Thou lodgest I shall be thine squatter and where thou diest I shall be present for the wake keep!”
When she saw that her determination was deeply ruthed, Old Childless Widow sayest unto her;
“Damn, why the hell not!”
So it came to pass that Ruth came to dwell with us, the chosen people.
But she was an outright lazy pile of bones, what with all the sitting all day under palm trees
And gisting and gossiping with passersby.  Well some folk thought she was a prophet
His name was Barak Oboma, he was dark and handsome and he was our leader.
She made him start a war with the people in the East whose military was whispered 
In dark places to be to be “The Talibansers” but that is a tale for another day.
Here ends the unnecessarily protracted and adjusted story of Root: the harlot turn
 Wife turn widow turn immigrant turned prophet.

Details | Epic | |


as we celebrate that glorious event known as Palm Sunday
what do you think that donkey Jesus rode would have to say?
to ride on a donkey was once regarded as a symbol of peace
a state that we in this modern era just can't seem to reach
but I'm so glad that I serve a God of peace and harmony
and I'm so glad that He sent His Son Jesus to save me

Jesus came into town riding on an untamed ass
the people were so joyful they threw palm leaves across His path
but He was not the type king that they expected
and before the week was out by them He was rejected
I often wondered what was on the mind of that untamed beast
on the day that Jesus rode him into the midst of that feast
never before to have been ridden by any type of being
so what do you think that donkey was spiritually receiving?
the Gospel according to an ass
to know that the Prince of Peace has come at last

God has a plan for each of us and it's full of His mercy and grace
but in order to receive it you need to be in the right place
positioned for your purpose you just need to be
in that place where of you the Lord our God can see
for when God is ready to move in your life you need to be found
in the right place at the right time standing on higher ground

Jesus needed that beast at that appointed hour
and it was positioned by Father God's almighty power
its destiny to be ridden by Jesus the Christ the Son
a triumphant symbol of peace because its time had come

a donkey is usually perceived as difficult, stubborn and headstrong
but is an intelligent beast just don't lead it in a way that is wrong
they have a sense of perception and self-preservation
are very easy to train just don't put it in a precarious situation
it was sure-footed and purposely positioned in the right place
the Gospel according to an ass to be ridden with God's saving grace

it was a kyros moment it was a sight to be seen
on the  back of an ass Jesus the Christ, the King of Kings
in the right place with the proper perspective positioned for its purpose at last
and that is the Gospel according to an ass

Details | Light Poetry | |

Talking To Kids Of A Whole NEW Generation

Note:  This is not my kids.  This is dedicated to a......friend 

Now my children time has come for me to talk to you. 
I've let you make your choices in what you wear and do. 
But this has gone way to far and way to fast. 
So let me touch on some points that had better not last. 

Daughter, with multi rings on your fingers and 2 on your toes. 
I know sooner or later they'll be one through your nose. 
Then do you know what will happen next time you sneeze? 
You'll be shootin' big 'ol snot globs out that hole at me. 
That tattoo that you've got on your big left breast 
You think it's sexy now, but let me tell you what to expect. 
Right now it's up there sitting pretty as you can see. 
But when you reach the age of 60, where do you think it will be? 

Son that tongue stud that your sporting doesn't look to sweet. 
I'm waiting for you to swallow it, the next time you eat. 
You swear it is  in there tightly and you have no fear. 
But when you tried to demonstrate you choked on it my dear. 

Daughter, that eyebrow bar is just the ugliest thing you've done. 
It looks like you had an accident with a pneumatic staple gun. 
Oh!, and lets not forget that sexy belly button ring. 
When you get old and forgetful, you can hang you keys from that thing. 

Son?  Just what were you thinking when you picked out your new tat? 
Homer Simpson eating a donut?  Couldn't you find something other than that? 
And to have it proudly spread out on your behind 
says you'll never have a girlfriend, unless she is blind. 
Then there is the subject of the ear plugs in your lobes. 
Just how big do you intend to let those puppies go? 
They're going to hang down like some ear handle 
Folks will think I dropped you twice.  Oh god, They're going to dangle. 

Daughter those clothes your wearing don't make you a looker. 
I won't pay the bail when you are mistaken for a hooker. 

Son, you'd better be pullin' up your pants, you hear? 
No one wants to see you walk like you've a load in there. 

Last and certainly not the least, your choice of hair salons. 
I never thought I'd see the day my daughter and my son 
Both with rainbow spiked hair, it all just says so much 
It says "Please don't hire me because I'm a big butt munch

Details | Free verse | |

It's a Little Funny

It's a little funny how i turned out
Most of the time my mother jokes
That I made it this far
With sunshine on sugar coated words and eyes brimmed with hope
Almost like green tea on a rainy day with a guitar playing in the next room
Different chords always strum my heart and seldom i know where to go
Seldomly, can i make the choice to be led or to lead
to give or to recieve a Heart
can't really take much more of the toxins he dishes out
  thus i am disoriented with vain poetry written on my bedside wall
only shadows can relate to that time
Oh my how time flies
oh my how many times can it fly
past the window into the street, into the stream of which both of us meet
and my poet, my art, my love
so heavy with life how far can it soar
baby how far can it soar
until it stabs your heart with my complete patheticuselessSELF

B  r  e  a  t  h  e

it gets so hard to breathe but it's harder alone especially when
  my dust, dust, dust can only collect on things that don't move
  so how come my dust follows me around
like an unbroken cloud eager to rain on your parade
It's a little funny that you say
how beautiful I am
when you are so much more beautiful yourself
I love that brown skin your in
it makes me think of honey covered chocolate
satin smooth and broken your eyes
broken like me
broken like you
  we should put ourselves, broken, together, whole
it's a little funny how 

Classical music on sunday afternoons always calm me down
with the window open and curtains blowing a little faith into my
  It;s a little funny how we put dead things in our bodies to be alive
Or how we destroy others to survive
 It's a little funny how my hand fits yours perfectly, but honey coated chocolate has 
always been my favorite
And it's a little funny of course, 
you and I
vague figures in the sunset covered with my dust and a little bit of your
honey coated magic. 

Details | Free verse | |

Not Quite Lost

Another book misplaced,
another search through piles 
of bills. My car keys dis-
and reappeared. Was it 
the cat who hid my glasses?
Why, here’s that memo
I’ve been missing!
How things get shifty
with the years.

Details | Light Poetry | |

Road Food

I really would like to thank you 
for taking me out in your car,
I can’t remember the last time 
that I got away this far.

And even though I’m not the driver 
it’s good to see the town,
No need to hurry back again 
let’s have a look around.

Traffic isn’t any more polite 
they still insist on blowing their horn.
What the heck is that in front of us? 
That car is giant a box of corn.

I really do love popped corn 
And at movies I would eat a lot.
But the size of that box of corn 
fills up a parking spot.

And there’s a mother and her kids 
driving Jell-O pudding packs.
Is this the way to get somewhere, 
do people drive around in snacks?

There’s a hippie in his carrot 
and I guess I should have known,
His bumper sports a sticker, 
“My car was organically grown.”

You should consider getting yourself 
a sporty new bag of chips,
Then spend your time driving around 
looking for roads with dips.

As for me I know just what I’d drive 
and I’d be as happy as a clam,
Because I’d drive a loaf of bread 
and go looking for a traffic jam.

Details | ABC | |

Ketchup Stains (

There is a place that I will never eat at again
I look back at the nightmare when I was ten
Back then not much of a strong stomach to endure what I did
This horror I couldn't keep hid
First of all, you know that back then, when they used the fly tape
It was full of its intended guests and dangling  three inches from our plates
Some were buzzing and squirming to get free
The scene was already getting the best of me
Welcome to the eatery that leaves you emotionally drained
The name of it is Ketchup Stains
One paper napkin issued to you as you walk in the door
If your table is not ready, you sit on a dirt floor
Sometimes you see a bug or two
It is almost as if the bugs  are not afraid of you
Everyone shares the same utensils and paper plate
That is why with multiple orders, you take turns eating, while other family 
members wait
As you sit  impatiently suffering from hunger pains
The place is crowded,  with free bathroom admission at Ketchup Stains
You ask  the waitress to refill the glass for you daughter
You watch as she dips the glass in the Horse Trough to get the water
You ask the waitress where is the ice
She says when that table there is empty, you can have theirs, now won't that be 
I ask her why do we have to share, this is insane
She says, this is all part of our hospitality at Ketchup Stains
I tell her don't expect a tip for your service
She says give me a reason to modify your food and make you nervous
I tell her it's time we go, cancel the food
She asks where did I grow up and become so rude
We have a history of everyone leaving happy, no one complains
Ya'll come back soon, share a spoon and enjoy some family time at Ketchup 
By the time we left there, we had a car full of hate
It bothered us so much, that night, we took flight and moved to another state

Details | Cowboy | |

Old As Dirt

You know that you’re old as dirt
When your whole body does hurt—
You grab a cane ‘stead of quirt
And you’re just too old to flirt.

It’s when you have to trim hairs
From your nose and your big ears—
You’re sure that those creepin’ years
Has justified all your fears!

It ain’t that you’re gittin’ old
Or Father Time is too bold
Or the last crow has done crowed—
It’s sittin’ ‘round till ya mold!

But if time comes a knockin’,
Don’t let it be too shockin’—
Don’t take your tack for hockin’,
You’re jest rollin’, not rockin’!

So when you’re payin’ for sins
And seems your life never ends—
You’ll know just who’s your true friends
When they has to change your Depends!   

Details | Rhyme | |

My Little Siis

My Little Sis

Without her I know just what I would miss
For she is something so special is My Little Sis
She puts in the effort to make life such bliss
There can only ever be one of My Little Sis

She always sends me a funny Christmas card
This year a bookmark on which she worked hard
Because of that I think I would be remiss
If I did not work as hard on this present for My Little Sis

Birthday cards are funny always a joke
Even the ones I send her at my sis fun I poke
Ever so glad to have her though her taste is so bad
You know sis, Triple H and that Shawn Michaels lad

Mother I believe gave a sigh of relief 
For the sports on the telly she would get some relief
But alas and woe it was just wasn’t to be 
For My Little Sis is worse than father, brother and me

I don’t know where she’ll go next what route she will take
But with her great determination with sis nothing is fake
She’s so kind and thoughtful “laugh” if you insist
But don’t let me hear you laughing, at my little sis

So sis carry on with the strides you’ve made
Keep your head up and don’t get way laid
When things look the blackest just look at this verse
Remember your brother see things could get worse

I suppose your not little time passed and you grew
Into a woman with a husband and children to
A Hettie a Philby you look after and own
I suppose that’s a sign that you really have grown

Yet deep in my heart you’re still My Little Sis	
Hope you don’t find that funny or think it amiss
On this birthday so special my love to you I send
For my little sis to keep even when time has come to an end

Details | Light Poetry | |

Big Love Part 2

He decided that the only way to get to her
was to take a little stroll,
It gave him time to work on his line
and he wanted to sound droll.

He decided that the line he’d use
when he came to her island there,
“I hear that they call you Lady Liberty
so I’ve come to take my share.”

In his mind it sounded like something
that James Bond would say to a girl,
The more he thought about it though
the more it sounded like Milton Berle.

He decided that he’d just have to be himself
and hope that it would turn out for the best,
He hadn’t been this nervous since
the last time he had to take an algebra test.

You see, he wanted to take a chance on love
because he was a romantic guy,
And what he wanted more than anything else
was at least a chance to try.

When you’re one hundred and thirty feet tall
you have limited options for a date,
So you have to take your swings when you’re up to bat
if you want to find a mate.

He tried to buy a ticket to Staten Island
but they’d have none of that,
But the ferry captain was a romantic too
and told him to be careful where he sat.

He looked across the water to where she stood
and he could see that she was tinted green,
He thought that she was probably the most
beautiful shade of green he’d ever seen.

Details | Burlesque | |

Sarcasm Soup- Time to Take a Bath!

Time to take a bath
When the flies buzz around you
(and they are wearing masks!)
And the room deodorizer leaves the room
It's time to take a bath
Believe me, it's not too soon!

When the bathwater turns inky
And people say you're stinky
Time to take a bath
 When roaches start spraying you
White bathtowel a dark dark hue
It's time to take a bath!

When your visitors come, wearing surgical masks
Won't drink your drinks
Use only their own flask
And a bullet to the head
Is all you ask

And your primary doctor is Joseph Mengele'
Your only pet, a biting flea
It's time to take a bath

You've sunk so low, so very low
Your whereabouts, even you don't know
When the water jumps out of your tub
And your belly button is home for a grub
Maybe much more is needed
Just a bath may not do the trick
When no matter what you try
You make all others sick
Better start by sitting down with
a chisel or paint scraper
You've got so much work ahead, my friend
Your mind will turn to vapor!

ps- to those who commented on celestial traveler,
I'm glad to report I reworked the end...thanks for your constructive criticism.
regards, tom

Details | I do not know? | |


                                   OUTLAW JUSTICE

Frank and Jesse James strapped there pistols on their sides
The Youngers got together and saddled up to ride.
   Butch and all his gang made ready at the wall
   Sundance made his final bet in the gambling hall.
Billy at the time was only seventeen
but he was faster with a gun than most had ever seen.
    The Clantons were all fuming cause Wyatt made them out a clown
     they were hell bent on revenge the Erpps were going down.
Doc was sitting on a couch coughing up his lungs
sitting with a rag in hand cleaning up his gun.
     A stranger on a pale horse had met them one and all
     he told them they would all meet up, when he came back to call.
The time had come for paybacks they have had enough
the law and order marshals simply were unjust.
    The outlaws all decided they should talk it over first
     but when they got together it was a meeting of the worst.
Sun dance stared at Billy who spit in Jesses face
gun shots started echoing all about the place.
     When the rider on his pale horse, rode up in the dusk
     everyone was dead and gone and turning into dust.
so much for outlaw justice, or perhaps it was indeed
a justice much befitting, for a dying breed.
                                                                "the phantom"

Details | Free verse | |

Broken Promises of This Year

Hello New Year
I heard you'd be comin soon
At midnight I waited 
Standing under the sparkles and gleamers of hope
Counting down the mistakes of 2011 
Counting up the calories of a resolution
Better luck next time 2013
Here's to you weight watchers
I guess I didn't do so good just watching

Details | Free verse | |

'The Man In The Moon'

Exposed, thou... Moon
Where you live, I dwell
Distinctly... for I am that man
Banqueting on your cheese

Illuminator of night
I remain under your watch
As long as time is measured

Details | Rhyme | |


the life of a student doth do well
the jargins of homework feelith like hell
so big my brain, filled to the top
too much, too much, pop pop pop!!
save me! Oh this poor wreched soul
cast me away, I'll take the north pole
hell shan't find me out there
so cold and lonely nay a soul anywhere

Details | Rhyme | |

Father Time

Father time I am humbled, 
Brought down by your power.
You have made me a weed 
In a garden of flowers.

My back hunches over, 
I can’t hear anymore.
And my poor wrinkled rump 
Now drags on the floor.

My feet have the gout, 
And my neck has a crick,
The lenses for my glasses 
Are three inches thick.

I have a cane and a walker, 
And I eat through a straw.
I have a jar for my teeth, 
And I snore like a saw.

They make me wear diapers, 
And they won’t let me fart.
They keep feeding me beans; 
Say they’re good for my heart.

Father Time you’re a bastard, 
Not funny at all.
But there’s one consolation, 
Though it’s very small.

Although I am withered 
And barely alive,
I still have my license. 
Think I’ll go for a drive.

Details | Senryu | |

Blackjack Senryu String Part II

Well, I’m back again!
Treat me better than before.
I need some winners.

I remember you.
The last time I was down here
You were not too nice!

You let me win now!
Lady luck’s been a bad girl.
I hope you’ll change that!

Here is my money.
Please let me have some good cards.
I’m not quite even.

I’m starting out small.
I’m doing this for good luck.
I sure could use some!

So here come the cards.
You give me a jack and nine
That is not too bad.

So I have nineteen.
And you have a ten showing.
I think I’ll stand pat.

So what’s underneath?
I have to see that hole card.
Sixteen and a bust!

It’s another ten!
Both of them give you twenty.
You beat me by one!

Well, no more of that!
This time I’ll double my bet.
Won’t you let me win?

And it’s two aces!
I’m going to split that pair.
Give me two tens please!

An eight and a nine.
I have nineteen and twenty.
Your up card’s a six!

A ten’s underneath.
Those cards give you a sixteen.
One more for a bust!

You gave yourself five.
It’s another twenty-one.
You beat both my hands!

This is the last time!
If I don’t win, I’m leaving!
Here’s another bet.

A seven and four.
So you gave me eleven!
I will double down.

Now you have it all.
That’s the last of my money.
I need a big card.

And you give me nine!
I hope a twenty’s enough.
Will you bust your hand?

What’s under your four?
Your hole card is a seven.
You have eleven.

Five gives you sixteen
Won’t you bust with your next card?
You’re going over.

What?  Another five?
Your twenty-one beats my hand.
That is it!  Good-bye!

Details | Ballad | |





Details | Free verse | |

I Am Laura's Stomack Part 1

It’s Monday morning, she’s got up. 
When I asked her for breakfast 
she told me to shut up. 
When I asked her for my porridge 
or at least for an orange 
she told me to keep quiet 
as from today she was on diet. 
She has noticed cellulite 
and decided to get rid of it. 
In the day time it was a real crime, 
she didn’t put anything inside me, 
so, I thought to remind her about me. 
I switched on the gurgling of my gastric juice 
(after all I had nothing to lose) 
at an average speed, 
hoping she would hear me and would feed. 
But nooooo! My anger began to grow. 
I decided to strengthen the gurgling, the rumbling, 
and…added a little bit of  sound. 
At last she looked around 
and found a cabbage leaf, 
I quickly digested it and cried: 
I want beef! 
At night when she went to sleep 
I had only one wish – to weep. 
I saw sweet dreams when she lived with her parents, 
I thought she had inherited their habits. 
How happy I was! 
We always had the 1st, the 2nd and the 3rd course. 
But hell! It was not for her so well! 
She told them she had already grown 
that’s why she could live on her own. 
What else could I say? 
The same story happened the next day. 
I was very, very angry 
because I was very  hungry. 
I’ve been shouting during the whole day: 
Where is my salad? 
Where is my soup? 
Soon you won’t see me even through a loupe. 
On Thursday in the day time 
she gave me some plums. 
But what’s happened with me? Was I really a numb? 
I was so week, I felt so sick. 
Without any questions, without any digestions 
I’ve passed all the plums to the bowels 
for them to know the particulars. 
Next morning in the bathroom 
I said goodbye to all those horrible fruit. 
Do you know what ‘s happened then? 
She gave me some yogurt.

Details | Free verse | |

The Golfing Newbie

The players come out to play. The audience gathered around, cheering them on.
One by one they take acknowledgment . The speaker motions to settle down.
He steps up to the tee with confidence. Ahead of him lies sand and a deep pond.

The ball takes flight now so high and far. Missing the hazards now it's home run.
A crowd supports him by cheering him on. Walking so proud looking for the ball.
Walking down a runway of grass and looking. He hits a ball again oh how fun.

They gather like mocking birds. They watch now on the green and what a sight.
This time a moment if silence. He hits the ball and wait, the club flies just as well.
He gasps for air and stutters. Bogey now becomes a painful word so not right.

If only he had a good caddy now. This is no good especially in an all time tourney.
What happened to his skills just now. Feeling numb from the shoulders on down.
Oh what a trauma to the family name. Momma will knock him out onto a gurney.

All that prize money flashing before him. And it was such a dream to walk on top.
Looking at the crowd watching him now. He chokes his caddy till it turns all blue.
What a clown says one, join a circus maybe. Now going in history as a big flop.

Details | Couplet | |

Musical Dream #10

I love listening to Bach on late evenings, especially his flowing ‘Ave Maria’,
just as I like tuning in to Schubert’s ‘Ave Maria’, far too many Ave Marias!

Nothing compares to Beethoven’s ‘Moonlight Sonata', it’s simply beautiful;
George Handel had he lived would have found Ludwig’s piece rather cool.

Amadeus Mozart, truly he was a musical genius, that Austrian son-of-a gun,
it’s high there among the classics, the elegant ‘Theme from Elvira Madigan’.

Give me Antonin Dvorak’s ‘New World Symphony’,  so serenely majestic,
that, like Tchaikovsky’s ‘Concerto in 1st Movement’, creates instant magic.

Let me tell you a little secret: my days in the cradle had long ago passed by
yet, till this day I drift off to dreamland with a few strains of Brahms’ ‘Lullaby’.

Chopin he tinkers with his piano dreamily, that young romantic Polish chap -
etudes, nocturnes, mazurkas, you name it, though he could not do hip-hop.

I adore the songs of  Bobby Dylan, though not necessarily his croaky voice;
honestly, I prefer listening to other minstrels sing his tunes, if given a choice.

Joan Baez, Joni Mitchell and Judy Collins, those gals sounded to me so fine;
I once volunteered to produce them but they said “Are you out of your mind?”

Could not do nothing with the three J’s, so I turn to Lennon & McCartney
who once rocked my childhood with their irresistible “yeah, yeah, yeah”.

Leonard Cohen, does that man ever smile? so moody and stark his music
but I love him anyway, though figuring out his lyrics often makes me sick.

Denver and Donovan’s stuff are sugary for my taste at times I would say
and there are occasions when I crave for songs that sound kinda lonely.

So I often give way to my old buddy from country land, Kristofferson man,
and let his somber ‘Sunday Morning Coming Down’ get me all undone.

Sad songs, joyful songs, all styles, will they ever come in just one package?
so I won’t have to spend much on CDs that is straining my minimum wage.

Given those great musical influences I have painstakingly mentioned above,
it is a sure bet I am off to greatness if I just behave and do what I truly love.

Details | Quatrain | |


When he was just a baby
Upon his mama's knee,
He was smaller than an elephant,
And larger than a flea.

And when he was some older,
And had to go to school,
He was duller than a genius,
And sharper than a fool.

Then, when he was a young man,
In the prime years of his life,
He was younger than his mother was,
And older than his wife.

Now that he is middle aged,
He's really very glad
To be older than his grown-up son,
And younger than his dad.

Details | I do not know? | |

Pink Is O.K.

don't you just love 
the skin your in?
dimples on your cheeks 
when you smile and grin
light and darkness make beauty begin
blending  elegance and cuteness
from forehead to chin
your eyes
for the very first time i've seen
"The windows of the soul"
your hair 
I would prefer black or grey
but for now, i guess pink is O.K.
don't you just love the skin your in?
i do

Details | Lyric | |

I'll silence the Moon

I'll silence the moon, for me, to be in your room. 

Details | Blank verse | |


The Jester

This not my poem, just what someone said 
on TV. I merely wrote it down, a comedian 
spoke about sex, come to think of it
the joke wasn´t very funny so I decided to 
ignore it. It´s hard to be a funny man, some
of them try so, hard too nervous to stand 
still prancing about telling a stream of 
humorous thing end innuendos that are 
embarrassing and the public laugh and clap.
It is ok to be gay if you´re a comedian, flailing 
arms about and walk funny, and the public
laugh and applaud… I met a comedian once 
in a bar, he was trying to sell time shares and
could not stop telling jokes. When I went for 
a slash – Oskar you are vulgar- he followed me
into the loo a never ending stream of jokes,
mostly about people who buy time shares. 
He followed me outside had three dogs in his
car and offered me one. Next time I saw him
he was trying to sell expensive motor boats,
he had gone temporary, wore suit and tie,
didn´t recognize me, looked at me with sad 
eyes… no point telling jokes today. The joke 
I heard on telly, sorry I have forgotten it now. 

Details | I do not know? | |

so gorgeous

so gorgeous 

so gorgeous you are 
that you 
beauty has filled 
an enormous 
open scar 
so gorgeous you are 
that i would leave the 
corners to keep your love
so gorgeous you are
that heaven is there with you
so gorgeous you are 
that if i haven't seen 
you i'll be loss for ever
so gorgeous you are 
that sun go down and 
you keep the light shining 
so gorgeous you are 
i don't even wanna stop writing

Details | Rhyme | |

Time To Get Up

Tick tock tick tock
Out window with that clock
Each and every frigging day
Tells me to get out of hay

Brushing teeth
Breath smelling so sweet
Another dam hole in sock
Oh how I hate that clock

Blue jean entire
God I'm really tired
Clean sand bugers out of eyes
In rush to say goodbye's

Gas light engine on again
This crisis is such a sin
Scrounging pockets for a buck
Pulling out lint what such luck

Morning greetings from the boss
When all I wanted to do was stay in bed and toss
Paper work piling up
No coffee to fill my cup

Tic tock tick tock
Come on hurry up dam clock
For shopping still has to be done
And let me tell you it's no fun

Kids husband dogs and cats
Drive me nuts like a pack of rats
What can one do
But not to come unglued

So I want to give a big thanks
To my alarm clock that doesn't play pranks
And gets me up and out that door
So I can pay for those things I truely adore

Details | Haiku | |

Voltage Insulation

Black birds are clinging
Close on the electric line
Insulated feet

Details | Rhyme | |

The Ex

I have an itch I cannot scratch,
This itch is a she.
I have an itch I cannot scratch,
Somewhere in behind me.

I have a wheel that need some grease,
All the time it squeaks.
I have a wheel that need some grease,
Every time she speaks.

I have a fly buzzing 'round,
It really is a pest.
I have a fly buzzing 'round,
To swat it would be best.

But all I do is tune her out,
And move on with my life.
And so I tune her out,
So much for the ex-wife...

Details | Blank verse | |


A long time ago, in the dark lands of the gentile pagans
The people where like giants and our twelve spies; ants!
The spies’ mission went sour and they were almost captured.
Ten managed to escape to our lovely desert camps; enraptured!
The other two made themselves scarce, to the inconvenience of a woman
 Who hid them in the roof of her house and lied to save their hides.   
By and by, our brave woman married one spy and another gentile woman
Married the other spy…oh the dreadful tides!!!
It so happened that our promiscuous spies both died, and at the same time too.
Their distraught mother (for they were brethren) decided to return home.
But the woman who had first hid them made bid to return with her
But Old Childless Mother said “turn away my daughters for thou hast seen I have 
No sons and am too old and ugly to attract a man, for surely any man attracted to
Me in this state must darn well be impotent or desperate!”
The second saw reason and turned back home to her shows for her name was Orpah Winfey.
The one who had first hid the spies refused and said (with courageous theme playing in 
The background) “intreat me not to turn aside, for wither thou goest, I will go and wither 
Thou lodgest I shall be thine squatter and where thou diest I shall be present for the wake keep!”
When she saw that her determination was deeply ruthed, Old Childless Widow sayest unto her;
“Damn, why the hell not!”
So it came to pass that Ruth came to dwell with us, the chosen people.
But she was an outright lazy pile of bones, what with all the sitting all day under palm trees
And gisting and gossiping with passersby.  Well some folk thought she was a prophet
His name was Barak Oboma, he was dark and handsome and he was our leader.
She made him start a war with the people in the East whose military was whispered 
In dark places to be to be “The Talibansers” but that is a tale for another day.
Here ends the unnecessarily protracted and adjusted story of Root: the harlot turn
 Wife turn widow turn immigrant turned prophet.

Details | Quatrain | |

Old Age??

My age is getting up there
middle age is knocking on my door
They say I shouldn't worry...
I'm only thirty four.

I'm noticing the wrinkles.
I sense that double chin
is creeping right up on me.
Fight gravity?? I can't win!

I use to feel so youthful.
I thought I'd never age.
Back then I planted flowers.
Today I'm growing sage.

Sometimes I forget my own age.
It's not that I contrive.
Like when I wrote my bio here

Is that a sign of old-age?

Details | Haiku | |

Time To Hit The Sack

winters foliage
blankets trees and grassy knolls
hibernation time

Details | Blank verse | |


A long time ago, in the dark lands of the gentile pagans
The people where like giants and our twelve spies; ants!
The spies’ mission went sour and they were almost captured.
Ten managed to escape to our lovely desert camps; enraptured!
The other two made themselves scarce, to the inconvenience of a woman
 Who hid them in the roof of her house and lied to save their hides.   
By and by, our brave woman married one spy and another gentile woman
Married the other spy…oh the dreadful tides!!!
It so happened that our promiscuous spies both died, and at the same time too.
Their distraught mother (for they were brethren) decided to return home.
But the woman who had first hid them made bid to return with her
But Old Childless Mother said “turn away my daughters for thou hast seen I have 
No sons and am too old and ugly to attract a man, for surely any man attracted to
Me in this state must darn well be impotent or desperate!”
The second saw reason and turned back home to her shows for her name was Orpah Winfey.
The one who had first hid the spies refused and said (with courageous theme playing in 
The background) “intreat me not to turn aside, for wither thou goest, I will go and wither 
Thou lodgest I shall be thine squatter and where thou diest I shall be present for the wake keep!”
When she saw that her determination was deeply ruthed, Old Childless Widow sayest unto her;
“Damn, why the hell not!”
So it came to pass that Ruth came to dwell with us, the chosen people.
But she was an outright lazy pile of bones, what with all the sitting all day under palm trees
And gisting and gossiping with passersby.  Well some folk thought she was a prophet
His name was Barak Oboma, he was dark and handsome and he was our leader.
She made him start a war with the people in the East whose military was whispered 
In dark places to be to be “The Talibansers” but that is a tale for another day.
Here ends the unnecessarily protracted and adjusted story of Root: the harlot turn
 Wife turn widow turn immigrant turned prophet.

Details | Rhyme | |

Majestical Land

I was carried away up and over a topped stack just the other day,
By the oceans of blue cascading across shadows of magnifying rays of sunlight!
One by one they dashed through the trickery Sun as if they had no night.
I was drawn much closer in watching the Moon reflecting on the ones that sway.
Then I was taken by the swishy swore of the bouncy Sea rolling as the tide came in.
I just so happen to be taking a much deeper breath as the stars lit up like shields of sheer.
Breathless I just took it all in, over and over again until I saw there was truly no end.
Marveled, just down right marveled at the time I already just simply spend,
Then I saw a most wondrous bumbling bee, soaring aimlessly through Majestical Land. 
All in a single moment with time to spare, I saw balls of bouncing thunderous lights.
Then it was a much greater reach for a more logistical articulate helping hand.
Then I saw big white fluffy balls unfolding in the heavenly quaking open sky.
One by one colliding atop the luxury of just floating or shuffling them self right on by.
Marveled, downright marveled at what was passing me by, I just knew I’d die.
I absolutely was standing beneath the Majesties undeniably clever designated plans.
I saw blueprints and designs above the weighty scales and receipts.
What strategy for self-defeat with the books I write and keep!
Hooting and hollering cheering louder in Majestical Land, with my brilliant plan!
But then I was carried all the way back to the toppling stack,
The Majestical Land amazingly had not one single little lack.
“Marveling I tell you”! “Just down right Marveling”! 

Details | Senryu | |

Night Buzz

Night Buzz
Loquacious wife snores,
His mind’s reprieve, time to rest;
Silent time to think.

Details | I do not know? | |

Catching Time

As Time passes by me day by day
seemingly slow
As I watch the occasions go away
and people grow
As I stand still, happy in my way
watching aged woe
As I continue on, come what may 
no frailty to show
I see people grasping at time to keep their life anew
I see myself aging, oh god, should I be catching time too

Details | Lyric | |

Time Travelin' Man

He traveled through time, playing his country tunes
His melody of life, a time machine in his room
Stunned them in the nineteen twenty's, with Let It Be Me
And awed them in twenty-one twenty, with a Hank Melody

He fell in love in twenty-three twenty, at the Starlite Cafe
And when he gave her a kiss, he found she wasn't a she, she was a he
So he got back in his machine, and headed for Tennessee
That's where he met Elvis, in the year of seventy three

He always kept travelin', this time travelin' man
Playing the oldies, to a new kind of fan
They laughed at his clothes, but applauded his toons
As they listened to him playing, under the moon

He traveled back home, with a star in his eye
Ran into his wife, she just set there and cried
He gave her a kiss, showed her his machine
They both crawled in, and have never been seen

Oh! He always kept travelin', this time travelin' man
Playing the oldies, to a new kind of fan
They laughed at his clothes, but applauded his toons
As they listened to him playing, under the moon

Details | Rhyme | |

Delusions of grandeur

With weary despair, I cast my glare amid the bottomless pit,
only to see your reflection, mirrored in it,
the whole of time, with just me to watch,
a beacon of light, waving a torch.

Chasing dogs through space...
With a child's playground, in an adults mind,
the cows are milking me, it must be time for tea?
Universal thought, with a timeless stare,
what delights do you hide under there?

So many aeons of civilizations,
all with just one realization,
to come to life with such dramatization, 
across chasms of time and canyons of space,
those dogs led me a merry race

Surge the transcendental shift, give your consciousness a healthy lift
and breeze through the Ether, with delusions of grandeur,
out among the worlds far flung,
You hear the wind? That's my song thats sung,
Feel the rhythm! Hear it pound?
subtle vibrations create stable ground,
with a twist of Higgs Boson, matter is bound!

The branches of life that spring from thee,
all the tentacles of a family tree,
and to think i'm still just a monkey!!
 Bring on peace and love and i'll go bananas ;)

Details | Light Poetry | |

' The Dance ... ' (Part 2 of 2)

‘ The  Dance … ’

Oh … How I Love To Dance
Why … Do I Love To Dance ? …
Its Rhythmic … Its Ritual
… The Body is So Beautiful ! …

Once … I Saw The Ocean Groove
… That’s The Way, I Want to Move
Earth-Spinning, Round and Round
Don’t You Know … We All Get Down ?

Don’t You Know, What The Good-Book Says
‘God’ … Moves in Mysterious Ways
That Is Why I Love To Dance …
… His Empire, Moves In Elegance !

Lord, Have Mercy, Keep Moving Me
Moving and Grooving, to Your Glory !
Blood-Flowing, Lung – Breathe
‘ The Spirit ‘, is Zooming … You Better Believe !

( Just Look At It Move ‘His’ Girl, MoonBee !_

Acrobat, Hip-Hop, Ballet
Art of Tap, Polka, Reggae’
You Can Do It !… I Know You Can
Just Listen, To That Bible – Band ! …

Music … Just Adds Motivation
Stirs A Soul To Celebration
Dancing … is A Declaration
We’re On Cruise-Control, In His Creation !

Dancing … Can Be A Holy Act
God, and His Son … Like It, Like That
So, Nod Your Head … Do The Wave
Signal ! … You Want To Be Saved !

Don’t Be Shy … At Situation
Meet Me At ‘ The Revelation’
They’re Opening Up, The Garden – Gate
… Hurry Now … Don’t Be Late !

Cherubs, gonna’ Let Us In
No Cover Charge … Bring A Friend
Oh ‘Son of God’ … Please Partner Me
… Dance Me To Eternity !

Oh, How I Love To Dance
It’s A Rhythm – Romance
Passion – Performance
Yes Lord … I Love To Dance

Dance! … into Eternity
Dance! … Better Than A Fantasy
Dance! … Universal Dance Floor
Dance! … Don’t You Wanna’ Dance Some More ?

Dance ! … Now, Can’t You See ? …
Dance ! … We Gon’   P a r t y !
Dance With This Girl, thru The Galaxy
Dance With The Stars and The Only MoonBee

Boys Shout ! … ‘Bring On The Dancing Girls !’
God’s Making A Wonder World
Them … Us … You … and Me …
Still Moving … To His Mystery !

           Now Dance ….

Details | Rhyme | |

Let's Duke It Out

I was born in nineteen sixty nine
just off the block and in my prime
now let me introduce you to 
some pertty good friends of mine

Let's start with my uncle Jesse
to me he looks like he's ninety nine
but I love to watch him when he
takes nips from his moonshine 

Here's my owners Bo and Luke 
cousins of a kind just hanging out
with Daisy who looks 
so sweet and so darn fine

But There's some other folks
that just don't like our kind
its those sheriff folks thats
watching the hazzard county line

Starting with their fearless leader Boss Hogg
Who's radioing all the frigging time to
Cooter and Davenport And to that rascal
Rosco P Coltrane who he cannot find

Now my life is such sweet devine
when your jumping in and out of my windows 
while running from those sheriffs from Georgia County line
in my general lee waving a confederate flag thats in it's prime
Honking my horn to a dixie tune of same kind

Tribute To The Dukes Of Hazzard LOL

Also Entry For
Christopher Higgin's 
Get Your Rebel On!

Tho This Poem Is Not About A Person 
Changing My Life But The Time Era Did
And Something About That Show Changed Me
About Opening Your Heart And Home To All

Details | I do not know? | |

Watching Tv

You want to go out on your own for a beer
Catch up with a friend you’ve not seen for a year
Hear all the news about who’s doing what
How much they earn, and the things they have got
But your wife says now honey, stay home with me?
So you sit and stagnate as you watch the TV

The big games tomorrow you’ve tickets for two
You ask her to go, but there’s so much to do
The fence it needs painting, there’s stuff to repair
The car and the mower the tread on the stair
When the chores are all done and you’ve time that is free
You sit down, and you watch, the big game, on TV

Its spring time its warm and how the sap rises
Your looking for love but there’ll be few surprises
She knows what you mean when you say time for bed
And will promptly announce she’s got pains in the head
So you fix up a sandwich, a nice cup of tea
Then sit there and fester and watch the TV

Let’s go to the lake we can hire a canoe
“I’m sorry I can’t I’ve got ironing to do”
We can take a nice picnic and go to the coast
“There’s no time for that, not with chicken to roast
So go off and do what you do when your free
Just leave me alone, go and watch the TV

Details | I do not know? | |

i'm not a thug

i been in shoot outs 
almost left for dead 
not once did i 
i'm a thug
drunk to the bottle was 
not once did i scream 
i was a thug 
smoke to my eyez was half pass 
still not a trace 
now you threw on a durag 
and hat heard your latest
rap cd 
now look at your face

Details | Couplet | |

Grandma's Rhyme Regarding Money

If it don’t make dollars, it don’t make sense,
Because ain’t nothing going on but the rent.

Details | List | |

Not Enough Life Insurance

My life is technically half over
Wouldn't do any good to complain
So here's a list of things I want to try
Before I go insane...

Bungy Jump
Go on a Safari
Wake Board
Rock Climb
Drive a race car
Swim with the dolphins
Camp in the Grand Canyon
Do 360's in a jet

There's nothing wrong with dreaming
I'd probably pee my pants
I can handle that part
I just can't find good insurance!

Details | Narrative | |

Smart Woman

It was the evening before Thanksgiving,
so off to the biggest store in town I went, for a few items,
I needed to complete my Thanksgiving Feast.
Everyone was grabbing, and hurrying to get out.
I was totally out of my comfort zone, 
for I hardly ever come here,
except to buy a few things, you don't find anywhere else.
Then there he was, lost as a goose in a thunder storm,
his wife had played a severe trick on him.
A list he held in his hand for the items she needed.
I heard him talking to himself, so I stayed close behind him,
just for the entertainment.
Marshmallows, does she want the big ones or the small ones,
oh no, couldn't put that down, so I'll buy both.
Cherries, now where are they, probably way over on the other
side of the building.
Just then he turned around to look at me,
am I blocking you, if so I am sorry, but I don't know 
where anything is, and with this crowd in here, I can't
even think, much less find anything.
No, I said, you are fine, I am just as lost as you are,
that's when he told me, my wife played a cruel trick on me.
She wanted to come early, and get this over with, but I told
her, what is the rush, well, I will never say that again, ever,
and if I get out of here alive, you will never see me pushing a buggy
in here again without my wife.
I don't know how she does it.
I thought to myself, smart man.
We have to give his wife credit, smart woman.

Details | Sonnet | |

Global Trot

I’m out of my mind but I am just perfect and just fine.
I went around the world and what a blast it was for me.
I’m sent with a message from a golden gate master key.
I shook I rattled and I rolled brand new maps I did align.

I founded you and I demolished you but swam like a fish in line.
I ran to and fro as I was left behind thrown forward but I did see.
It is a global trot I tell you to survive naked or dressed just to be.
And then it came to be true and real that this was mine all mine.

So I sit in the seat with no defeat.
The world goes stupid and so mad,
But I stay clean and of course neat,
It’s just a silly little one time life fad.

Pain and suffering has just about killed me and you,
Together or apart it is a world we will always renew!

®Registered: Ann Rich   2009

Details | ABC | |

Pardon My Dolly (

When I seen her, I knew I had to make her mine
She comes a family with a knack for design
She is put together so very well
She has been mine for 15 years, no one can tell
I know this story must sound melancholy
But please if would pardon my dolly
She has never needed any reconstruction
She carries extra weight time to time but removes it quickly, no need for 
I love her so much, she is the one I know who will never let me down
She has strutted her stuff all over town
She enjoys being around me 
We have avoided so much contreversey
She waits for me right beside my bed
She need a new coat, possibly bright red
We ride together in a Denali
If you need a ride, I will say in advance pardon my dolly
She has seen more places than a band on tour
Everyone is familiar with her each time we enter a store
My girlfriend feels threatened by her, her name is Molly
But each day I politely tell her, pardon my dolly

Details | Bio | |

Truth Hurts

Although they might say honesty is the best polices. Don't tell the mess to me, 
honesty hurts and I already do enough hurting to me. Don't you ever fill that you 
cant tell the truth just say it because you care and not because of a bad attitude. 
The truth really hurts, And angry people are always willing to help spread the 
good word to hell with your feelings and to any body who cares. I can take your 
honesty if I thought you were truly my friend yes I no that's messed up. But a 
friend wouldn't knock a friend down just to build himself up. Never the less I will 
take your honesty if you must give it to me. I appreciate the time it took you to think 
about me, but with all the good that honesty can bring sure seams funny how it 
can causes so much pain. Although they might say honesty is the best polices. 
Don't tell the mess to me, honesty hurts and I already do enough hurting to me. 
Don't you ever fill that you cant tell the truth just say it because you care and not 
because of a bad attitude. The truth really hurts, And angry people are always 
willing to help spread the good word to hell with your feelings and to any body 
who cares. I can take your honesty if I thought you were truly my friend yes I no 
that's messed up. But a friend wouldn't knock a friend down just to build himself 
up. Never the less I will take your honesty if you must give it to me. I appreciate 
the time it took you to think about me, but with all the good that honesty can bring 
sure seams funny how it can causes so much pain. 

Details | Quatrain | |

Best Taxi in Town

The model cub in Tyler, Texas Announced a model contest I saw an event I could enter But it will be a big test I only had one little engine It seemed to run really fine A birthday present given to me An Arden Oh Ninety Nine I’d never had a successful flight Only one event could I try To qualify for Class “A” Beauty Just three level laps to fly I checked out all the Class “A” Kits Mr. Mulligan was picked I built my plane without any help Glue, paper and balsa sticks Fly three level laps to qualify Then the plane is judged on beauty Obviously to have any chance My plane’s had to be a “cutie” So I painted and painted that plane It was finally looking its best I just refused to do a test flight Might crash before the contest Finally the big day came around Two guys signed for my event Before it was time to qualify I went to the judge’s tent They said: “You’ve got it all to yourself, You’re now in a one horse race” One guy had scratched his self from the list And one never showed his face My God, how could I be so lucky? Not competing with those guys Just three level laps and then; Guess what? I walk away with First prize Now it was time to fly those three laps The engine started OK I revved it up, as much as I could Thinking this maybe “my day”! Walked to the center of the circle Handle in hand, gave a nod He turned the plane loose and it went straight It what happened next that’s odd Mr. Mulligan just would not fly On the ground, went round and round Then I could hear the laughs from the crowd Things like: “Best taxi in town” That’s a day I will never forget But it still wasn’t in vain Before I’ll fly a contest again I will be testing my plane

Details | Ballad | |




Details | I do not know? | |

On the Las Vegas Bus

I’m heading for Vegas on the bus.
My cash is pinned on me real tight.
The AC’s down and it’s stuffy in here,
But I’ll have a nice cool room tonight

Only I won’t be in it -- I’ll be downstairs
In the casino just playing the slots,
And this time I know that I will win
And not just a little, but lots lots lots!

The wheels keep roaring Whee, Whee, Whee,
They’re rooting for me, like I feel them cheer.
No shows, no dinners once I check in,
Just one yummy pizza along with a beer.

There’s nothing sweeter in all this world
Than the sound a one armed bandit makes
When I’ve hit the jackpot and know I’ve won,
And I will win no matter what it takes!

I learned all about slots from a booklet I read,
By this time tomorrow will I ever be rich!
I’ll quit my job in a heartbeat then
And I won’t care one bit if they call me a witch.

I just can’t nap on this homeward bus.  
Its wheels keep groaning Aw Aw Aw
Like they’re sorry I lost every cent I had.
I’m through with Sin City forevermore!    

Oh wait, something’s shining under the seat --
A button I think -- hey, it’s a dime.
You know what?  I’m sure it’s my lucky coin
And I’ll play it for sure when I go next time!

Details | Free verse | |

The Flusher

The Flusher
The Super man came to the door again what he said was it this time ants said 
eye ants just ants and eye only flushed it once The super man was knocking on 
my door the ants came out and killed the neighborhood said the super man and 
then he knocked upon my door the ants are tiny creatures eye began they got in 
the radiation from the computer store said the super man it is not and never will 
be the fault of eye began to understand this super man the ants is grown and 
feeding to get larger and to roam upon the city Blue and Proper is the suburb of 
the urban dweller there oh super man please help me put them in the krypton 
bottle and please just keep them there the super man looked thoughtful and his 
eyes were sort of Blue and Proper he began to understand the eye and rounded 
up the ants in the city Proper but Blue had been destroyed. The Blue City had 27 
people living there so for twenty seven days you have to flush just only once and 
use it only then and hold it in for all the rest of them times that bathroom time 
comes and do not dispose of ants that way the eye is done with flush as a 
means of my disposal now for twenty seven days. Thanksgiving to the super 
man the flusher is okay.

Details | I do not know? | |


This was a time when humans were new,
before stress in our lives, caused us to brew.

When survival meant eating dino doo doo and
grunting was the language everyone knew.

As time went by, certain gestures arose,
like to push or kick or to club ones foes.

Then one day, a strange man had appeared,
he had this defect that everyone feared.

Most of his features were normal you see,
but his two middle fingers, grew like a tree!

The words he could speak were so very few,
yet he blurted some garble, my name EPH EWE!

He’d use these fingers to knock others down,
make them feel hurt and give them a frown.

He could make someone sad, others got mad,
for his fingers were weapons like nobody had.  

He would fling them about and proudly exclaim,
EPH EWE! He would grunt, continuing his reign.

To this day his name is a worldwide phrase,
as the gesture of fingers became a big craze.

Most get offended when receiving this sign,
but don’t hesitate to use it… if so inclined. 

So if ever you wish to make someone frown,
make them feel bad or just put them down,
just whip out the fingers and call out his name,
for EPH EWE, is the symbol, that keeps us all sane!

Details | Free verse | |

Back To School

It is time once again
To go back to school.
Its time to buy new clothes and 
Pull out all our pencils.

With bravery we shall march
To that awful bus stop,
Were we shall wait
To go back to school!

Little ones hide from bullies,
Best friends reunite.
Cafeteria food is served,
While children run with fright!

Back to school is fun,
but it can also be so gruesome
so come prepared
or you will be left behind!!!

Details | Romanticism | |

The Septuagenarian

The swish 
of our feet
‘neath the sheet, 

with our thoughts and 
the fleshly

lyrics of 
a night rain, ah I’d have 
never perceived that 

it would  
becharm us—
the septuagenarian! 

Details | I do not know? | |

A Tale Of Two 'tweens

Two boys in their 'tweens 
Around the time of 1915
Had jobs and chores at home
Couldn't just run and roam

One Saturday when in town
Saw an ad  the circus 
Was coming around
Saved their pennies

Did some work
Couldn't wait to see
What was possible quirks
Thrilled with excitement

When the time came around
Wanted to go all day to town
Around lunch dad said could go
They ran to all the way to show

Longingly waited in the line
Wondering what on the inside
They would finally find
Inside the huge tent

Found seats prefectly fixed
Comfortable in there place
Never knew would have to race
Outside in a heated pace

To be saved from terrible harm
The show had started excitement
Built, someone in the bleachers
Some liquor spilled

Another person who just as careless
Threw down a match that was what set it
Someone yelled fire as the tent went 
Up in flames and the 'tweens

Went jumping, running
Saving their skin
Looking back over their 
Shoulder as they ran

Both hit the brick wall
Of the local dry good store
Knocked flat out pulled
Away from the fire

By some passerby
Lived to tell about it
On another day 
I was glad they were alive that I say

(This is based on a true story that my father told me of this happening to him and his 
brother in Concord around 1912 up to 1915.  They were both just before being a teen ager 
or very early teens.)

Details | Sonnet | |

The Note

I was corner-stoned by many of you.
The note was dotted with a dash.
But this note was an ultimate smash.
I found a peephole and peeped through.
I found a bird gave him the note and away he flew,
Across the deserts and the valleys he was there in a flash,
Across the rivers and Oceans he made a great big splash.
He made it to the shore, but the note he began to chew.
He passed a timely test,
And his belly was full,
He did not stop to rest,
The note he had to pull.
The bird landed on the Oceans shore,
Singing praises of his rugged chore.

Details | I do not know? | |

No time for bodily functions

No time for bodily functions

Too much to be done the toilet must wait
Started to early wont finish till late,
My list of to do's goes on till next week
No time to listen and no time to speak,
A fully booked schedule chaotic and vast
No time to go slow to worn to go fast,
choc-a-block choc-a-block no time to let steam
No time to sleep and no time to dream,
No time for bodily functions
No wonder people think I'm full of  crap

Details | Rhyme | |

Blue Collar Blues

I ain't got no money,
But I work my butt off,
Every single day.
I work so I can have a place to stay
All of the time, 
I work to get half of your dimes,
That you drop when you go down to flop.
Unlike you I never have time to watch the clock.
I got a degree that I don't use,
Because of the negligent leaders that you choose.
Unskilled labor aids the campaign.
You talk about me,
But you don't care to know my name.
I got skills:
But I have to pay the bills.
I want to be like you and cruise on a yacht.
I'm building what you bought.
I'm putting your house on a lot.
I'm scrubbing your pots.
I'm working as an indentured servant.
Hoping that I get what I'm deserving,
But for the time being: I'm slaving,
Dancing to my homemade tunes,
Complaining to colleagues, who are 
also on their knees praying for life
To get better, Singing strongly the 
Blue Collar Blues.

written 9-5-04
while still a college studenta

Details | Free verse | |

Most Certainly Gladly Left Alone

I just want to take the day off
 Walk all over the house, up and down the hall in my drawers
With a lit cigarette in my mouth 
    "Round the time I was supposed to be clocking in
Trying to meet ends
More I make the more  they take
Today it's not gonna be that way
My old girl gone and took the kids with her
I'm not wrong ladies
But fellas!
Don't she have to leave in order for me to miss her?
TV is cool but it can't never take the place of a Marvin Gaye groove
Food for the soul + Soul food
Cornbread, chicken,  and greens
Somebody somewhere knows what I mean
         When you want to be left alone
    A happy home stays that way when a man can stay there from time to time
With his records, cigars, gin and wine

           Left alone........
Just for a while with no one else around to put him down
 Or raise a fuss when the music is up loud

 Simply left alone, Not separate
You'd be suprised  how a whole lot of things would stay together that way

Details | ABC | |

Keep Me Under Control

I am so wild, I carelessly run around
I am the last horse in a one horse town
I'm as wild as wild can be
I have zero guidance, so I live my life aimlessly
Do what you have to, send me to assist the Border Patrol
I need someone to neuter me and keep me under control
I live life by the seat of my pants
I don't want love or trues romance
I believe that every moment counts
When you fall down, there is still time and room to bounce
If a jet can fly, it can surely land
When wrong is done, justice needs to be a firm hand
One day I may feel peace and love deep in my soul
When I find that one that can keep me under control
If there is a poster child for bad, it has to be me
I do not welcome the Devil, but there will be no begging for mercy
I often wonder what do people think
I really don't care after my third hard drink
You are wasting your time if you want to preach
You are educated, so do your best to teach
I am not worth being loved by you, so do not glow
I want discipline, so do your best to bring me under control
I party and sin and live as I please
I will never be driven to my eyes
I am a rebel and that will never change in my life
Not looking for love, a white picket fence or a loving wife
I can take the streets and deal with them blow by blow
Are you the one to keep me under control
Some people have it, some don't and some never will
I'm tired of hearing about it, I have lived it, now it's overkill
The question is do I want to sell my soul
You can save me if you can keep me under control

Details | Free verse | |

Before Man Time

You were my first muse,
Rustling Branches of Tree,
before ever I knew a man
before that time began
when time advances 
and stands still
with fits and starts.

You were my first,
Rustling Branches,
before ever I knew 
to impress a man,
and I was happier
then, before time 
slowed to his rhythm.

Details | Alliteration | |

Watch Your Money (or Fun Comes With a Price)

A finder’s fee for finding their fill
Provided me some time to kill
The fee fully was so fair
As I had money to burn and time to spare

A sweet sexy sensational senorita
Made me think I had to meet her
With her hands all over, there was a cost
The money I had, is now all quite lost

Details | Free verse | |

Cranberry Float (part2)I

time has no meaning here
all about is tidings and cheer
our team always win
and the wind keeps the kites high
the grass cut and green
the lake blue and serene
soccer moms and toddlers toddling
while dads encourage
at finale at last 
we run to to the square for a blast
we eat our burgers with cheese
and double malted shakes apease
but not for me the only thing that satisfies
is a cranbery float
whilst listening the juke box boom
and watching as everthing pulses in the room

Details | Narrative | |

Mansions in the Sky

The Stars lit up the skies and nothing could I see,
Except these huge Mansions that fly in the sky.
Swirling winds picked me up and carried me high.
Making trails in the clouds it was just me.
It was breathtaking just to be,
Afloat the top of mansions that fly.
The Moon was bright and the Sun a bit dry.
They were huge and magnificent to oversea.
 Mansions in the sky that fly above it all.
Mesmerized I went in and found no end.
None were too small.
None occupied, not even by a friend!
Mansions that fly fill a brilliant sky,
All emptied but not by I!
© Copyright: Ann Rich  2006

Details | Narrative | |

With the hoe's crown

Tinkerbell is such a hoe
She never hung out with Joe
Most of the time she hung out with Peter
Who never bothered to read her
Text messages or E-mails
Cause they definitly were sent to females

Peter never had time to work
because she was always out of her shirt
So Peter grew up and moved away
Because Tinkerbell always had time to play
With other boys that she saw when she floats around town
Looking for her hoe's crown

Now after Peter had done his growing up
Tinkerbell eventually caught up
But she was still wearin that crown
And still floatin around town
And Peter saw her and all her actions
Which led to his violent reaction

Tinkerbell went down in her sparkle and mist
Because Peter accidently caught her with his wrist
Then she saw her creeping up from behind
So she reached for her mist, which she just couldn't find
And she saw the look of Peter's satisfaction
And there was no action, but for Tinkerbell's contraction

Eventually Tinkerbell was found
But not without that hoe's crown
That she always wore around town.

Details | Light Poetry | |

Where I Stood...

Its funny how times have changed
Changing in ways to only uncover
Whether sad, be it joy to never remain
Did you forget to only remember?

I see all there is to see
And I watch, or rather to observe
No matter the time for us to be
There just isn’t enough time for every’s worth

I sat back tonight… alone
And I try to remember where I was
I see in myself many changes… shown
But harder was to see what made the cause

A world made never in harmony
Became the world we live in today
Humans to be humane for humanities’ humanity
When can time ever be for a yesterday?

Perhaps not funny are times to change
Simply moving along to only discover
Perhaps only a little harder is to maintain
Yet to forget as always to only remember

Details | Free verse | |


Happy New  Year!
Time will tell.
What lyes ahead
Come toll the bell.

Kiss your love.
Eat pork and kraut.
Sing "Auld Lang Syne."
Throw troubles out.

Make resolutions.
Add the old.
Pray for peace.
God make us bold.

Happy New Year!
As the bells do call.
Ringing in
New Hope for all.

Details | I do not know? | |

Ricky Ricardo kicked my ___

(This is a fictional poem)

I built a time machine and I went back to 1952.
Ricky Ricardo kicked my ___ after he sang Babalu.
I told him that his song sounded like a big piece of crap.
He cussed me out in Spanish and gave me a good slap.
He started beating on me until I hit the floor.
That was over a month ago and I'm still sore.
I had never taken a beating like that before.
I'm not going to travel through time anymore.

Details | Rhyme | |

No Time

No time he spends with us
He says because I fuss,
Fuss that is all I do
But he knows, I'm telling the truth.

The truth the don't want to hear
So he says, I'm fixing to do dear,
I'll be gone for a little while
Until you stop acting like a child.

He don't spend time with us like he should
But you know that's all good,
Words he way that's just a phase
Watch it, God will soon shorten his days.

He claims he's broke and broke all the time
I hope he don't think i'm going to believe that line,
Believe that line that's what he thought
I don't really care that's his fault.

If only he would spend time with us
Then I wouldn't keep up so much fuss,
Then I don't have to drop a dime
If only he would spend a little time.

Details | Lyric | |

A Piece Of The Night

When the sun comes
It'll be rising while I'm sinking
Actually I'm realizing that the moon is more likable to my thinking
It's out when the day is at it's coolest
When the fools get even more foolish
Or when the good gets better
To whom ever however
They choose to do their thing may midnight be as good to you
as it's been to me

It's made the meanest girl just that much more sweeter
Carried a deep conversation even deeper
Even when my sleepy eyes were burning
We kept on talking on the telephone
Reaching out right beneath the stars
What better way to escape 
When you don't even have a car?

Details | Ballad | |


The final challenge 
The grand finale ,so to speak 
The one they have all been waiting for! 
All week! 
Massive detonation! 
Instant gratification! 

I was all set........ 
All conditions met 
My trigger finger ready 
My hand steady.............. 

I didn't hear the resulting  boom......... 
A bright white flash............. 
I was instantly turned into ash! 
My body ,reduced to atoms! 

I didn't object........ 
To the Manhattan Project! 
This was going to far........... 
Blew me away 
Turned me into a star! 

Now, I am thinking 
The most famous stars are dead........ 
Legends live on....... 
I shall be immortal instead! 

This is difficult............ 
I need time to think.......... 
The Narrow Squeak Show, 
has a limited run,you know! 

It's gonna take time to collect......... 
all my particles and ash 
I really must dash! 
I will carefully select....... 
The time and place 
For, I have far to go........ 
Amonst the stars 
To start the second show! 

Details | Senryu | |

Time Out

time out, my love
fire is everywhere…
our safety first

Details | Ballad | |

Bubba Spent the Night

Our son asked can a friend stay over
He just moved here from dover
The friend says tonight's Friday, usually we have pig's innards
He says my name is Cleetus Billy Joe Jim Bob Jones, after he stutters out his 
name, it's time for dinner
But you can call me Bubba, he seems very polite
I pray no nightmares as Bubba spends the night
I tell him we are having Makerel Cakes and Mac and Cheese
He says I will take four cakes and two helpings if you please
Boy you sure do have an appetite
I tell my son our budget won't allow Bubba to ever again spend the night
Soon dinner is over and Bubba still wants to eat
I grab a funnel and melted bacon fat and tell him to have a seat
He says we eat fatback soup sometimes on a weekday
He tells me the doctor tells his whole family, that sometime their arteries will turn 
to clay
bubba says I don't eat for calories, I eat for taste
I tell Bubba, if you keep eating like that you will become hazardous waste
He laughs and cheers in delight
This all happened when Cleetus Billy Joe Jim Bob Jones spent the night
At 2 am he asks for a snack
I give him a sleeve of Ritz crackers and a pound of Monterey Jack
I hand him a jar of Grey Puopon
He says after I eat this, there may be trouble in your john
He smiles and asks for a Diet Coke
I try to watch my health, I don't drink or smoke
Eight more hours, then our budget will be alright
He asks when is the next time I can spend the night

Details | Cowboy | |

Old As Dirt

You know that you’re old as dirt
When ever thang done hurt—
And you trades a cane for quirt
‘Cause you’s too old to flirt.

And when you have to trim hairs
From your nose and your ears—
You done knowed those creepin’ years
Has justified your fears!

It ain’t that you’s gittin’ old
Or Father Time is bold
Or that last crow has done crowed,
It’s jest sittin’ till ya mold!

Old sport, jest what’s the matter?
You ain’t no mad hatter—
You ain’t old, that’s jest blather—
You is jest gittin’ better!

But if time comes a knockin’,
Don’t let it be shockin’—
Don’t with yer tack go hockin’,
You’s jest rollin’, not rockin’!

So when you lose all yer friends
And seems life never ends—
You’ll know ya ain’t on the mends
When ya end up in Depends!   

Details | I do not know? | |

weeks dispare

On Monday I am overloaded with homework and stress
I couldn’t find my assignment, my day was a mess
Tuesday was fun but in class I fell asleep
And once I got home the silence I couldn’t keep
Wednesday was a boring, sort of gloomy day
Only the wind and the rain bothered to say hey
Thursday the walls decided to speak to me
Yeah I was that sick I just needed to leave
Friday was a relief cause the weekend had arrived
My joy, hope and happiness I could no longer hide
Saturday brought freedom yet none of my friends called
Maybe they were attacked or maybe just mauled
Sunday rolls around and schools about to begin
And I remember where that assignment was that I needed to turn in

Details | Ballad | |


Old Sam had carted nightsoil for a decade ‘round our town; 
A happy sort of chappy that let nothing get him down. 
He always found solutions to most problems in this life 
And went to no ends finding ways to rid himself of strife. 
Just like the time I found the note tacked to our outhouse door 
Along with one of hubby’s socks – sounds strange, but wait there’s more. 
It seems Sam’s eldest daughter had got in the fam’ly way 
And he’d convinced her darling beau there’d be a wedding day. 
A shotgun aimed strategically had helped persuade the lad 
And Sam convinced the young buck that he’d make a real good dad. 
The night before the wedding day Sam’s organised his suit, 
A singlet, jocks, shoes and socks, but felt a dopey coot. 
His sock drawer it was full alright, but none of them a pair  
And now he had to make a choice.  What was he gunna wear? 
I’ll sleep on it -  the old mate thought, but now it’s time for bed; 
He had to get some shut-eye for the big day just ahead. 
Sam had his run to do first up and much to his surprise 
He found upon our washing line a sight for his old eyes. 
A pair of socks that he could see would match one of his own 
And figured that he’d borrow one and treat it like a loan. 
And with another problem solved Sam scrubbed up pretty well; 
He gave the bride away that day and things went rather well. 
Of course he washed our missing sock, before he brought it back 
And told the story in his note, attached there with a tack. 

Details | I do not know? | |

It's Funny...

It's funny, you know?
How this entire thing started...
Boy meets girl, they're from two different worlds,
Boy miraculously proves himself:
They end up together

The funny thing is, did we really have a choice?
Same classes, close lockers, same homerooms,
Sometimes I feel this was forced,
But not in the beginning,
In the beginning it was beautiful

It was funny how it started, you know?
He treasured her, loved and respected her,
She felt special, wanted, and cared for,
He tells her that she's beautiful,
He tells her that he loves her

It's funny how we grew on each other, right?
From online conversations to midnight visits,
How hugs were exchanged for kisses,
And kisses yielded love,
In the beginning it was beautiful

The funny thing is how time changes things
How infatuation can grow to love, passion, obsession
How he, who used to stare at her,
Now doesn't spare a wayward glance,
Doesn't tell her that she's beautiful

It's funny how you never really know someone,
That is, until you've spent a lot of time together
But Boy and Girl couldn't get enough,
They were so intense and electrifying
In the beginning it was beautiful

It's funny how he used to talk to her,
With such care and measured voices,
Being sure not to offend, hurt, or disrespect
How he used to treat her as if she'd disappear,
He doesn't talk to her the same

It's funny how she just takes it,
She's never taken disrespect from anyone,
But her love of his past is strong,
And her excuses made for him surpass it all
She feels unappreciated

It's funny how he used to touch her,
With such gentle, tender fingers,
Caressing her side and brushing the hair from her face,
Now fingers are lustful, and a lover's tongue is at her side
He is changing

It's funny how he used to play for her,
Just to see a smile graze her lips,
Just to see the stars dance in her eyes,
To feel the warmth of her skin on his arm,
Now he is changing

His voice is viced; his touch, transparent;
His gaze, a once over; his reverence, indifferent;
His melodies, silent; his kiss, shallow;
His love, unproved;
Now he is changing.

Details | Free verse | |

Birthday Funk

Birthday Funk

Little ones can’t wait to mark the passage of time,
Presents and cake, everyone making a fuss.
Young folks use this time to push out their chests
And say,” look at me”; I’m responsible, I can vote!”
But pass a certain mark and the gifts you get
consist mostly of slippers you can warm in the microwave,
Or Barry Manalow CDs….and maybe some thoughtfully sweet diabetic candy.. 
Because” You look like you’ve been putting on some wt.”   .Ha! 
Last week I heard”Let me help you with that sack of flour”,(5 friggin #’s)
Or “ you know there is a senior citizen discount offered today.”
You become terrorized by your mirror and
Spend a lot of  your time squinting at fine print,
You have to guess at the menu because
Once again you’ve forgotten your reading glasses...
And will NOT, even consider borrowing his…
Even for a slightly better blur.
But, realistically I know there are compensations for getting older,
Lets see, hmmm, I’ve forgotten what they are. They’ll
Come to me. When they do I’m going to write them down.
Seen my pen?.

Details | Sonnet | |

All Fool's Day Sonnet

The wolves are out howling at the full moon
Jokesters are next and will be here real soon
I am holding tight to my silver spoon
See you in Dodge City when it’s high noon

My heart skipping and jumping as it beats
Knowing this day will be a fancy treat
Some folks are waiting to turn up the heat
I like this day because it is so neat

All Fool’s Day is remembered far and wide
With a smile I think I will stay inside
My heart will sing and also try to hide
Whisper All Fool’s Day and stand by my side

The wolves are out howling at the moon
Jokesters are next and will be coming soon!

Details | Light Poetry | |


Turn on Channel four,
Sultry starlets on the screen
For lasting beauty- use Maybelline
For winning smiles-try new Dentyne.
Turn the dial once more…
Aging actors on the screen
“You have our lifetime guarantee.”
“So, call right now, the call is free.”
Forget about ratings, the real Nielsen scheme-
They sell us to death the American Dream.
It wheedles; it whines; it badgers; it yells;
With wit and without, just simply to sell:
Gold MasterCard, taste a smooth Nestle´ bar,
How you can remove every childhood scar;
Seek out your true mate, reduce mortgage rates,
You need a loan? You don’t have to wait!
Leaders and gutters, Parkay- not butter,
Send a bouquet and make her heart flutter;
Grow beautiful nails, yes, please save the whales
That actor! His movie! All the details!
One snug Sealy bed, now talk to the dead,
Moments that matter, use Closeup instead.
Much better than butter, smoother than cream,
Free from the jingles that drive me to scream.
Now I can take my time and pursue
A worthier past time than just watching you.
I can learn how to cook;
I can read a good book;
I can go out for a drive
So that I know I’m alive.
But the will to walk out and just leave you is weak, 
So it surely can’t hurt to have one more peek.
Imagine me up there on the screen,
Ha! The fearless con man’s scene.
Selling bath oil or lotions,
Hawking health food and potions,
Hey, maybe even perpetual motion!
Hmmm, but, with a new hairdo, a smart pinstripe shirt
And the right camera angle, which sure wouldn’t hurt.
Good God! I would do it better than him.

Details | I do not know? | |


Frank and Jesse James strapped their pistols to thier sides
the Youngers got to gether and saddled up tp ride.
  Butch and all his gang made ready at the wall
  Sundance made his final bet at the gambling hall.

Billy at the time was only seventeen
but he was faster with a gun than most had ever seen.
  The Clatons were all fuming cause Wyatt made them all a clown
  they were hell bent on revenge the Erps were going down.

Doc was sitting on the couch coughing up his lungs
he sat there with a rag in hand cleaning up his gun.
  A stranger on a pale horse had seen them one and all
  he told them they'd meet up again when he came baxk to call

The time had come for paybacks they have had enough
the law and order marshels simply were unjust.
  The outlaws all deceided they should talk it over first
  but when they got together it was a meeting of the worst.

Sundance stared at billy who spit in Jesses face
gun shots starting echoing all about the place.
  When the rider on the pale horse rode up in the dusk
  everyone was dead and gone and turning into dust.

So much for outlaw justic
or perhaps it was indeed
a justice quite befitting
for a disapearing breed.

Details | Free verse | |


Looking out 
Of our upper room window
Over looking the garage
Where my old court stand still, with
Its ring attached to the cemented wall 
I see my dearest son, five years old
Playing basket by himself
Dribbling the ball
Zigzagging, against the unseen opponent 
Then he jumped, releasing 
A long range shot
And the ball landed into the net. Shoot, three points
So happy to see him, playing
Thou, as he walks to recover the ball, to do it again
I can feel his breath
Heavy and discontented, touching my heart
That made me whisper to the wind
Don’t worry, son
Dad’s rushing enough to give you happiness
I promise you
You’ll have your own playmate
Your beautiful mom is now one month late

Details | I do not know? | |


The musical notes of a ballroom dance float through my ears, fading in and out.  I 
sway back and forth in sync with the motion of the sound waves as they put me 
back to sleep. But once again, I awaken; disturbed once more by the beautiful yet 
increasingly erratic symphony beside me. It fades to black and I'm conscious. I 
find myself lying in a de-saturated yet highly contrasted jungle, next to a spotted 
tiger and walking snake. The ominous auditory sensation manifests, more 
eccentric than ever.  Light emitting diodes filling digital spaces creep into view, 
four wide and each with seven sections.  Evil sideways cat eyes appear to 
separate the auroras in half, and create a satanic monster. The sporadic noise 
has become constant, and the satanic monster is becoming sharper.  Now 
knowing that I am fully conscious, I look up, noticing that it is in fact seven in the 
morning, and it is time for me to wake up...

Details | Rhyme | |

A Mother's Wisdom

Make sure you wear clean underwear
In case you're in a wreck
The mother's wisdom I'll list here 
Is truly just a speck

Don't forget to brush your teeth
And never tell a lie
If you make that face it'll stay that way
But we never asked her why

Wear a coat when you go outside
Or you'll catch your death of cold
We heard these things everyday
Til the time that we grow old

It's just like time to repeat itself
Her wisdom is here to stay
For my wife still says these precious words
To our children everyday

Details | Free verse | |

Our different day.

You go to bed, you lie there, you toss and turn all night,
You cannot sleep, you can't lie still, you try with all your might, 
Morning calls, the sun comes up, you raise your weary head,
Now you have to face the day, and you wish you were in bed.
I went to bed, I lay there, and I tossed and turned all night,
I couldn't sleep, could not stay still, I tried with all my might,
Morning came, the sun came up, I raised my weary head,
I decided not to face the day, and I went back to bed.

Details | ABC | |

They Call Me Busta Pheasant (

I started my career 
As a person that removed wax from ears
It was down in the Texas Panhandle
I would use the wax to make candles
But then no one wanted their ears cleaned 
The work was Far and few in between
It will be time to relocate in June to Mount Pleasant
Maybe because they call me Busta Pheasant
June came and went and I am still here
Oops just spilled some coffee on my clothes, time for some all Tempa Cheer
The ladies call my gangsta name stupid
Me and you will be together, I'm just waiting on Cupid
My real name is Harry Bikiniline
Now you know why I am a prime example of out of sight, out of mind
I want to thank my parents for the wonderful present
For my stupid name forcing me to become  aka Busta Pheasant
The guys laugh they don't me as a serious threat to their girls
I tell them I bet you wouldn't survive in my world
My life is based on performance excellence
You're just jealous because you can't be called Busta Pheasant
Go ahead and contact 5-2-9 and Puddin' to ride in your Pacer on four doughnuts 
wearing your wife beater shirt
I will be stabilized at my home like the Enterprise with Captain Kirk
My Mom and Dad ask me when I am moving out
I tell them as soon as I build some clout
So they kick me out, I am renting a portion of the back yard and living in a tent
I have sign up that reads home of Busta Pheasant

Details | Rhyme | |

Tea With Ava ~or~ Up Since 3am

With teeth like gold sunshine 
and ears made of mint 
I'd give my right leg 
(if it wasn't so bent) 
to catch up with sleep 
that I lost in the night 
My head is of clay 
(it isn't quite right) 
My tongue feels like marbles 
I've got two left eyes 
My nose has gone white 
and I now feel to cry 
My brain is an ocean 
gone out with the tide 
My organs in crystal 
like diamonds inside 
I wish to be better 
I wish just to sleep 
but I've got a noon tea date 
and THAT I must keep..

Details | Ballad | |


Rabbit was my turtle who never won a race
Red is my fish but he's blue in the face
And I love my pets but they do no tricks
So I play all day and sleep at night with my sidekicks

My sidekicks~ Wa! Cha!  My sidekicks~ Wa! Cha!
Sometimes we stand on bricks, play swords with sticks
Sometimes we have tools for fixin', lollipops for lickin'
But when it's time quit and switch, they're still my fav clique
My sidekicks~ Wa! Cha!  My sidekicks~ Wa! Cha!   (Chorus)

Smokey is my cat and I love him too
Got a little kitty, named her Crystal blue
And another fish in a bowl I call Fins
But they do no tricks, so I play with my sidekicks again

I got Teddy and Roy and my bulldog Bully
And at bath time I get to dunk my pal Sully
Then there's Croc but is he an alligator
And Fishy is orange, before I see you later
I gotta tell ya Mr. Duck is now Mr. Quacks
But my favs of all time is Tang Tang and Scratch

And though they're stuffed animals~ they do all the tricks
Like my play friend Jerry- they're my sidekicks


A Song for my son Caleb at age 4

Details | Fibonacci | |

Oops, Not Yet, My Dear! (Fibonacci)

to midnight
we lay ourselves, on
the bed, her breath demands, willing… 
to intertwine, while my naughty right foot tickles hers 

the touch of a lonely bourgeois, searching under the 
silk sheet of love, with a hope, not 
only mine, but her 
own silent 

my own
wanting grows
and now, night-clubbers 
bowing their commitment, homage 
to lovers of midnight glory; a total silence 

as they pass thru dim-lit corridor, ‘cos we, they know
are surely amongst the many
too excited, in 
what’s life

night, but then
the clock strikes midnight
awakens the fragility
of the moon---begging to be in-between, till morn comes

Details | I do not know? | |


This is the one, I'm in love this time for real
How yall gonna tell me you can't fall in love in a week, yall don't know how I feel
Yea he told me he loved me too, that I was his main girl
Shoot he even told me that he loved me more than anyone in the whole world
Okay I know I said it before but this time I know it's true
Don't be hating on me because ain't nobody in love with you
After I gave him the booty he said it wasn't working out anymore
Here I go again now I feel like a dirty whore
But this week I found somebody else and I believe it's for real
Now how yall gonna tell me, yall don't know how I feel

Details | Free verse | |

Let me

Let me take time to think to decide

Let me take time to choose to select 

Let me take time to adjust to reside 

Let me take time to assess to reject 

Let me take time to try to solve

Let me take time to feel to combat 

Let me take time to be a drudge to get involve

Let me take time to be sure to start

For all the boring things that need my attention

Let me take time to be in this position

Details | Free verse | |


I'm forever thankful for my left hand 
I am pleased to be the sad inside the man... 
Disipline and misery 
Vaceline makes sex easy. 
Thinner than a paper plate, 
I'm thankful for this angst and hate. 
Feverish and incolence, 
I've an itch with innocence. 
Stuffing faces-vulger thoughts, 
of happy days and blood shot eyes. 
I'm forever thankful for my left hand. 
Guns arent for me, 
sissors instead, 
Crack in pile, now time for bed. 
I'm a raison in the son, 
You're my serpant with scales that run. 
Pages that turn make fantacy's 
I'm as small as the light on me. 
I'm as free as a beast can be. 
There's nothing like the useless me. 
Unless this road goes anyother way, 
I'll take a chance and forget today. 
Like a mother holds her young, 
I hold my breath each time I'm done. 
I'm forever thankful for my left hand. 
It made me the man that I pathetically am

Details | Rhyme | |

Gone are the days

Gone are the days of poodle skirts and bobbie socks,
classic cars and music that rocks.

The Ed Sullivan show and Elvis Presley’s gyrating hips,
guys racing their cars for pink slips.

No more drive-in theaters or soda shops,
forty-fives or school sock hops.

Penny Loafers or slicked back hair,
gas prices that are fair.

No more Howdy Doody time or black and white TV,
The Milton Berle Show or I Love Lucy.

Full service stations or diner girls on roller skates,
families cruising down route 66 to see the states.

An era when schools were safe and crime was low,
some of the best times one could ever know.

However time and technology has since moved on,
oh what a shame those days are gone.

Details | Free verse | |

Milt This One Is For You

I promised Milt I'd tell him a tale
Turn on a little Hillbilly music OK
I was about  the age of six or seven and bootleggin was a real bad habit.
Or so I heard

We had one road called the Cannon Ball Road
Where the law'd hide in the trees and wait for the brew
Trying to stop all of these illegal crews
Or so I heard

Now where we lived there weren't many homes
And most of the owners worked their homes were so new
You see all this took place back in WWII
Or so I heard

One afternoon mom, my little brother, a cousin and me
Were in the house it was pre TV
The door burst open and a man ran in, "I gotta use you phone right away," said he
Or so I remember

Scared to death mom showed him the phone
We all just stared as he made his call
And Zeke my  little brother started to bawl.
Or so I remember

He hung up the phone thanked mom and explained
He had to get hold of his brother, he said
It seems he'd heard the cops were planning a raid.
Or so I remember

He left and mom rushed to the door
There was no way to lock it to stop another scare
So she and my cousin pushed up a big chair.
Or so I remember

The next thing she did was then call my dad
"Call next door to his brother " is what he said
Zeke and I climbed upon the back of the chair 
And looked out the window until he was there
Or so I remember

The cops did raid Bushers Grape Vine after work
And as it turns out they went to our church
We found out  he had ran nearly three miles to ask for mom's help
Or so I remember
Zeke and I had so much fun on the back of the chair
Whenever dad would have to work late at night
We'd beg mom to lock the door to avoid another such scare
Or so I remember

Details | Free verse | |

The Dying Gardener

As she rendered him 
His daily medication
He noticed nobility

Over her 
Lovely, pinker face

And purity

Had curved
Her inner
And outside beauty 

“If God permits me...
To live a little longer
Surely, I’ll sow my seeds on her!” he said  

Details | Lyric | |

Paid In Full

Sick and tired of incarceration,

Of going to jail 4 no damn reason.

I’ve done more time & litigation,

Probably covered most every season.

We clean & scrub 4 unfit grub,

We bust our ass, so time will pass.

We want to leave; we’ve paid our dues,

Can’t they see, debts paid times two.

Details | Quatrain | |

Thank-You Garden

The garden is producing food
as we go about our day.
Without so much as a thank-you
this garden goes away.

While in full swing, we pick it's fruit
and never look back.
We haul it in as if it's loot
that fills our empty sack.

One day I'd like to thank-you
for the goodness you provide.
I hope I'll have the time to
but time passes like the tide.

No matter what you're thinking
I appreciate your care
Maybe you're just a garden,
but I'm sure glad you're there!!

Details | I do not know? | |

when i think of you my sister

when i think of you. 
i remember when mama
brought you home.  

i can still see her coming
up the sidewalk at 
grandmas' house
as if it were yesterday

i thought you were mine.  
i believe that is the first time
i felt pure crystal clear love
for another person in my life.

i remember when you were sick
and we lived on bear mountain
daddy put us in the car and....
mama held you upside down
and claimed later she did not
mean to

so you were wrapped up upsidedown
there i am crying like a banshee
and saying, is she going to die
and the parent people could' t
do anything to shut me up.

the memories are coming faster
of all the fascinations  and mysterious
things we were curious about 
during the lazy summers that
seemed to us never could end.

we laid on the grass and named
who the clouds looked like
we dressed our cats in clothing
that we made granny sew
for us, waded water where we 
should not  go and we looked 
at everything in this big 
wonderful world.

oh, and do you recall when i
read to you about the ransom
of red chief and you laughed 
so much.  i could make you
laugh so hard.

then.....there was that time at
the newspaper office.  you know,
the one time i disowned you
before the time i disowned  you
of being my sister...........the time
i took you to school for show
and tell.  and you ran off and didn't 
act right at all.  that was a deal

i could talk you into anything. you would
ask me ......Jo
why is so and so and  i would proudly
tell you the answer because i was older
and so much more knowledgeable....
well, at least you believed that

remember...the sweet times when grandma 
said we had to  take a nap .....and we wouldn't
go unless she went and got a pretty little yellow
chicken in bed with us.

i love the memory of the dresses that granny
made us.  poor granny she would do 
anything we wanted.

i know that this is long, but the 
 times keep flooding back to me
and for me it is worth thinking
looking back at the snapshots
in my mind and knowing how 
happy we were

i recall how you continuously  
would lock the door to the upstairs
of that big scary house and i 
would cry.

i got you back with all the
paper dolls i talked you
into buying and you hated them......  to be continued....

Details | Couplet | |

Another Tacky Break-Up

"I like you, but not like you think that I do
So let's just be friends - is that all right with you?
And please give me back all the gifts that I gave
and by any chance, did all of the wrapping you save?
Cause, now that we're "friends", I'm sure you'll agree
I should regift them all for my new love to see.
She's awfully picky, so please don't you bring
all the words that I said when I gave you that ring-
I was drunk.  I was sick.  I was on my death bed
and quite nearly insane, if not out of my head
So please just get lost, and I don't mean that mean,
but my new love is sure to arrive on the scene
So just send back the gifts, (you don't mind the expense)
It's the least you could do - for one of your friends..."

Details | Cowboy | |

The Old Man Rode Forth

The old man rode forth once more like many a day before,
To ride this land that was all his until he could no more.

They say youth is wasted on the young and savored when old—
But you don’t see the truth till you’re too senile to be told.

So the old man rode forth that day with wind that tugged his hair—
Until he came to a mountain and rested his horse there.

He thought back on the things he’d seen and it sure had been fine—
Then knew his life was not done. Hell! He was just ninety-nine

Details | Cowboy | |

Rodeo Roy

Rodeo Roy was a buckaroo boy,
A buckaroo boy was he—
Bulls and horses determined his courses—
They say he was only three!

Rodeo Roy never found his true joy,
Until he was all of ten—
He learned to chaw just like his dear ol’ paw,
Till he gulped and lost his grin!

He shot the bull until he was plum full
And had to prove he’s a man—
He rode longhorns till he bucked in the thorns,
But he showed he had the sand!

He wrestled steers till they came out his ears
And threw a good houlihan—
He rode bad broncs and took him some hard knocks—
But his life was never bland.

Rodeo Roy had to seek new employ—
It seemed he had done it all—
Sioux City Sal then soon became his gal
And that’s how ol’ Roy did fall!

Sioux did allow Roy into her corral,
But he’s the one that got caught.
Rodeo Roy has a buckaroo boy—
He’s changin’ diapers like he ought!

Details | I do not know? | |

Fake haters conversation

Hey y whats up girl did you see what happened to z
No what happened because i heard that d the wino knocked her up you know the 
one with a glass eye
no girl i didn't hear that one but thats not the one i'm talking about. she went and 
got this entire plastic surgery done and now she looks like the clown from the 
movie  from "It". Plus all of that plastic makes her smell like a wet dog.
Yo girl s stupid the she tripped over a cordless phone. Not only that she wears 
fake teeth.
Yo i'm telling you that i can't stand her. Next time i see her we are going to fight
Well here is your chance because here she comes and remember that I got your 
back girl
 hey z girl whats up? you know every time i see you your style is always of the 
hook. And your hair is always looking fly Right y
Right you look so natural and that perfume that you wear is hot. It fits you real 
good. You look really nice too

Details | Ballad | |

At Bubba's We Spent the Night

We take Bubba home to drop him off 
His father and mother come out, they begin to hack and cough 
His father extends his hand out to shake mine 
My wife says don't be rude, go ahead and shake it, I do so, his hand is covered 
with mucuossy slime 
After shaking his hand, I begin to gag 
The wife with no bra, smiles and hands me a Save A Lot shopping bag 
She takes a swig from her 32 oz brew 
Then offers it to my wife Sue 
I say come on, it is your turn to show manners now 
As she takes a swallow, I watch her face, the expression looked like she was 
trying to give birth to a cow 
Bubba asks his father if we can all stay the night 
The father says fittin' us all in one bedroom will be very tight 
I tell him we will sleep in the kitchen near the back door 
He says pay no mind to critters on the floor 
I ask where is the toilet, I have to go 
He says out back, you're in luck, I just dug a fresh new hole 
I think to myself, this is not the way life should be 
A night at Bubba's I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy 
At 3 am, they are in the kitchen stepping over us getting snacks 
We are offered each a bowl of that famous soup called fatback 
Bubba yells I want my box of cupcakes 
His mom hands a pack of Reelfoot pork hot dogs and says for goodness sakes 
He devours them as if he was in a hot dog eating contest 
Bubba says, after I eat my cupcakes, that will tie me over so I can rest 
A little after 4, Bubba gets his fill 
After breakfast, we were told we can leave on our own free will 
After trying some rocky mountain oysters, it is time we leave 
The dad says we would love to come and stay with y'all on New Year's Eve 
I tell him until 2040 we have plans 
He says that's fine that will give them enough time to collect some aluminum 
We move to another state with no forwarding address 
Never again putting ourselves in that kind of mess

Details | Dramatic monologue | |

A Companion

I am not a ball, after you’ve played 
You just leave it somewhere on the ground, 
Rolling to rest on its self.

I am not a food, 
Or a Chinese aperitif, when ever 
You don’t like, you leave it, untouched.

Neither, I am not worn clothing
When you need it, then it’s the only time 
You remember it to wash.

I am your companion, day and night;
You caressed me, when you felt sad. I missed your touch;
O, do I have to bring your slipper now?

I gave you comfort, when you were down;
I’m really not an envious being, but
I hate your silent treatment, it makes me sick.

This is happening, every time you sit in solitude
A lousy pen, between your white teeth; and
You, in deep thought.

Why do you’ve to slave yourself, thinking?
Thinking of something outside your world;
I am here, your faithful one.

Always will be here, for you;
Even if you come home late, I recognize you;
Your manly smell lingers in my skin.

Before, we used to stroll together;
We played happily, lately, not so often

Gee, how selfish I am, I shouldn’t be asking you this;
I must understand, you are an aspiring poet; indeed
You needed time to be on your own, to write.

But if, you need me, 
Just call my name, and
I’m ready and willing to serve you.

Thou, I’ve one favor for today, let’s play our favorite, 
Throw the stick wherever you want, Master 
And I’ll bring it back to you, with gladness.

Details | Burlesque | |

Tidbits of Madness Part 3

I wish I was an Oscar Meyer weiner....cause then I'd be in somebody's buns.

"I shall return!" I said to my last wife, last time I saw her in 1989.  McArthur I isn't!

Why are women so much smarter than men?  Probably cause they have brains.

I never realized just how stupid I was until I went to the eye doctor's.  See "A bad 
day at the eye doctor's" poem.

My eye doctor seemed to catch on real quick as to how stupid I was.

I hate to say it, but I think Rodney Dangerfield would make a better president.

Excuse me, but what year is this?

Did you ever wake up and realize the best part of your day was over?

I have a picture of me, when younger, flying in the air,in my karate days, kicking 
butt.  Now I need help just to pick up the picture.

How did I earn the nickname "Skuzz-Bucket"- I don't even own a bucket!

I guess the best thing about getting old is you got less time to suffer.

Wives- I need a chain letter.  Alimony?  Can't squeeze an orange that's already 
orange juice.  Excuse while I take the pits out of my hair.

And to my fans, I say thanks- wish I could afford an air conditioner though.

My "friends" gave me a room aerosol air freshener.  Seems the main ingredient 
was Zyklon-B.

With friends like that, who needs enemies?

Have a" happy"!  What a crock!

My doctor said he'd pay me not to come anymore.

He wanted me to join the "Euthanasia Club"

I didn't pass the test, however- they said I was brain dead too long.

Even the Girl Scouts mock me- they ask me for cookies!

I once had a girlfriend named "Cookie"  She was cute, but her butt was chaffed 
from bed-hopping.

Ever try to nail a girl while she's hopping on the bed?

Well goodbye my friends- see ya'll real soon...(Genuine White Trailer Trash 

Details | Senryu | |

Oh My Food! (Senryu)

fly crushed onto glass 
lost, trapped, can’t find its way out 
buzzed for help but zapped! 

Details | I do not know? | |


A pretty lawn tractor fell in love with a tiller,
A romance that was doomed from the start.
Because her ancestors were all Briggs & Stratton,
While the tiller is proudly Tecumseh at heart.
Now if he would confess his innermost feelings,
He is secretly charmed by the way her hood shines.
And there's something about her cute little head lights
That makes a strong  tiller go weak in the tines.
At night they both share the same cozy tool shed,
Among all the hoes and shovels and rakes.
But they speak not a word and nobody knows
How her poor carburetor trembles and aches.   

The lovely lawn tractor maintains her yard duties,
And the tiller tirelessly tends to the soil.
They never complain, but she has taken to smoking,
And he freely admits to using some oil.
So time marches on, and they bravely endure it;
As time knows no mercy, endure it they must.
The love they secretly share is still brightly shining,
But their paint is now peeling and they're showing some rust.

Oh, love unremitting; how tragic such romance!
How bitter, yet hopeless, the tears that are shed.
But east is still east and west is still west,
And never a tiller and tractor may wed.

Details | Burlesque | |


Watching all these science shows
Astronomy and such,
Lots of complicated concepts,
That I don't understand too much,

One that really struck me,
Wormholes in space and time,
Can lead to anywhere,
And really ring this Bell's chime

Just my luck,
I stumbled upon one,
In my hallway closet
Can't say that it was fun
Like having money to deposit

Seems my luck,
Grew sour,
Like rotted fruit,
Cause on the appointed hour,
I found my future was a' dapple
Here I was, tom bell,
A worm inside an apple!

Details | Rhyme | |

You Know What

Tarot cards and horoscopes
Dream catchers and ounces of hope
Rumors that roll from others lips
To reviel your lifes most recent events
Standing in line number one your time comes round
You open your mouth but out comes no sound
Looking around your embarresment shows throu
Little did you know Saints were in line number two

Heads or tails; win, loose, or draw
Funny how things are not alway the way you saw
The mind you have is your own and it makes you you
Imagnation is what runs wild making a fool; How true
So the next time someone says what you wanted to hear
Take time out and make sure what your heard was clear
A fact doesn't consist of bits pices and words not said
Thats how rumors get started; Heaven forbid

Details | Narrative | |


The grass has turned brown.
   The leaves have all fallen down.
The air has taken on a different feel.
    My allergies are back, oh where is that pill?
My eyes start to itch.
    My nose runs with a twitch.
This would be my favorite time of the year.
    If it weren’t for all the pollens around here.
As I stifle a sneeze.
   That was caused by this breeze.
My inhalant is near.
    Eyes are a blur I wished they were clear.
I feel like a sap. 
    Maybe I need me a nap.
My head wants to pop.
    Food tastes just like slop.
Did I mention this was my favorite time of the year?
    I can’t go outside I’m confined to right here.
The coolness at night.
     Oh such a delight.
The tissues are near.
     To keep my head clean and clear.
To the pharmacy my wife I have sent.
     To find me some relief is her intent.
Just six more months and it will all be okay.
     Then I can get out and play.
But until I see that day.
      Inside I will stay.

Details | Rhyme | |

Excuses For Not Writing

We make them right and left,
These things that hold us tight—
“I just don’t have the time
To sit and really write.”

It seems we’re too busy
To get around to it—
We have to make ourselves
Relax and just do it!

“I have to feel the muse
To write a good poem”—
That’s all a bunch of bunk—
It takes one to know ‘em.

Seems we’re all too busy
And fill our lives with fluff—
To write, you’ve got to write!
I think I’ve said enough!

You have the time to smoke
Or time to watch TV—
So find the time to write
And set your true self free!  

Make no more excuses
For never having time—
Words are a legacy—
Blank pages are a crime.

Words are writ on water,
Into black space are hurled—
Someone will remember
That we once touched this world.

Details | Limerick | |

The Poet, ‘Neath a Tree

There once was a great man named Poet,
He sat, ‘neath a tree, with Bob- his pet.  
He would wish all the time
That he could write a rhyme, 
But instead settled for cigarette.

Details | Free verse | |

Frere Jacques (or What Was I Thinking?)

It was a Saturday night, at around seven o’clock.
Still at home until the phone rang,
“Jacques, is that you?” the voice said.
“Yes” I said and quickly realized it was Simon.
“Come down to Club 21, all the gang’s here” he implored.
I quickly changed and ran out the door.
Oh, yes, everyone was there, a cornucopia of mixed delights.
Jeannie was there in a bright, tight blue dress.
Mandy was there dancing in a halter.
The twins, Bobbi and Bette, were smiling and offering drinks.
I couldn’t say no, now could I?

One thing led to another, drinks then did flow.
Looked at my watch, where did time go?
It was five in the morning, so I walked on home
Still wobbly and painless, but managed to roam.
It’s now nine in the morning, laying in bed.
What is that sound, and pain in my head?
My sister is yelling, to me, from the door.
Why did I ever agree to drink more?
She’s yelling that mom said we all have to go.
“It’s church time now, Jacques, Sunday you know?”
Oh why, yes, oh why, did I drink, not stay sober?
Now I am just suffering from the biggest hangover.
But my sister’s still screaming and louder she gets!
“Get outta here”, I shouted, “I need some more rest!”

Details | Cowboy | |

Heck, I Ain't No Cowboy

I’ve been known to buck a bale or two in my day
And I’ve loved a gal or a few and rode away.

I’ve dug up taters for just a dollar a day—
I’ve clerked in stores and let the boss man have his say.

There’s few ‘round here that ain’t had me in their employ—
But like I’ve always said: “Heck, I ain’t no cowboy!”

They say soldiers is heroes – I gave it a try—
I lost use of an arm and saw too many die.

But I ain’t no whiner and I never did quit—
I’m big and raw-boned and I don’t care one darned bit

What others may think on the range or back in town—
I’m just a simple ol’ soul that ain’t too profound.

I’ve busted some chops and broke me some wild broncs—
Bruised butts and cracked heads in some crazy honkytonks—

I’ve wrote me poems about the West and its joy—
But like I’ve always said: “Heck, I ain’t no cowboy.”

And though I’m downtrodden and may live in two worlds—
I savor a coon dog and still love all the girls.

I’ll leave with my ol’ hat and a pair of good boots—
A twelve-gauge shotgun and an ol’ Colt that still shoots.

You can bury me in town or out on the range—
‘Cause both of them is just fine and neither is strange—

Don’t belly-up to my pine box or act too coy—
Just tell the blamed ol’ truth: “Heck, he weren’t no cowboy.” 

Details | Kimo | |

White Noise

Slightly slouched sleeping in my sitting chair
Static sounds screaming on screen
Wake me while watching me

To Caleb my 7 year old who challenged me to write a poem about TV

Details | Rhyme | |

im a little rizla

Im a little rizla

Also known as a skin

Here with my friends

In our warm backy tin

we love the life that we lead

Everything here that we need

Cozy bedding yes indeed

We no someday our time will come

The reason we are here duties to be done

Fingers touching on our skin

The journey to skin base 

 Just about to begin

So excited my time is near

Bye my rizla pal's i have no fear

Been nice knowing you all

It's my time and duty calls

But we will meet again in our next rizla life

For our long chat's that were nice

Have a good smoke

Have a good life

Details | Free verse | |


i find it odd i find i find i found a sign it was a bad sign-
big big & bad.
i wonder as i wonder before in wonderment wondered
do i have time for more? 
more more as everyone in history always wants & knows
they wants more.
we all always wants more.
teachers try to teach me teachings teaching seeming like
hypocrisy, accessing me to see
there's more that i could be.
which is what hurts the most you see.

Details | Narrative | |

Poor Potato

Supper tonight was really a mess,
the microwave cooked my potato,
twenty minutes, no less.
Smoke was billowing, from behind my back,
I sat there eating, wondering why the room was
turning black.
Then I remembered that potato all alone,
I opened that microwave, and my potato was gone.
Nothing but the peeling, and it was hard,
now that potato is a possums supper out in the yard.

Details | ABC | |

Inside Jane

She's the finest one I have ever seen 
She requires a bath, but can't handle the Afro Sheen 
She is high maintenance, which I don't mind 
She receives complements from time to time 
There is something special about her, I just can't explain 
It always excites me when I'm inside Jane 
She is long and sexy, a real lady to me 
And everyone that meets her does agree 
No other can compare 
With all my friends she is shared 
She was expensive, I paid an outrageous price 
She's my pie, but I don't mind you having a slice 
I own her, she is my property 
She has demonstrated unswerving loyalty 
I think I will change her name to Candy Cane 
I control the heat inside Jane 
She is getting up there in age, I may soon have to replace her 
The next lady I buy, I will call her Jennifer 
After my use of her last time I discovered a stain 
Came from a dog that wasn't properly trained 
I apologized to her and asked her not to be mad 
She has been the most loyal one I have ever had 
She is more than eager to entertain 
What? Cut the dirty thoughts, she's my private plane

Details | I do not know? | |


(This is a fictional poem)

My father-in-law is so old that his first friend was Barney Rubble.
When he comes to my house, he causes nothing but trouble.
I can hear him coming when I hear his old bones creak.
He pees all over himself every time he tries to take a leak.
He tries to get my wife to leave me every time he comes.
He eats all of our food and then he gets drunk on my rum.
When he visits, he gets mad and raves and rants.
I want to see the look on his face when I put a lobster down his pants.
He's coming over tonight and I'm going to break a lot of his bones.
I'm going to raise hell until he leaves me alone.

Details | Ballade | |


The aches and pain I fill on my feet, is of wear and tear felt way down deep,
         from birth till today, I never seen them this way,
         two things that moved me the most, two things I thought were gross,
they've been there in the cold of winter, frost bit and splintered,
          exposed to the summer heat, never once did I cover my feet,
          brought me home drunk and a mess, climbed the mountains and life's little tests, 
they carried me off to my first and last day of school, went with me every time we moved,
           was there when I walked miles for my first kiss, even there when I missed,
           helped me stand when I took a fall, for them being there I couldn't crawl,
they took me to great heights and times, was even there when I committed a crime,
            held me up as I watched my children be born, & moms funeral as I morned,
            helped me teach my son to play ball, to tell him hold your head up stand tall,
they helped me lift my baby girl, to hold her point and show her the world,
              they carried me to all of there events, never once did I fill the dents,
             the scares,the bruising, never once did they indicate the misusing,
they've been cut, dry and poked, yet stood me up every time never once did they revoke,
              now years later I fill them cry out in pain, when I stand I fill the strain,
              I hear them as they crack, I fill them when I sit and relax, 
in life there is so many things that help you move on, love,friendship, even a song,
               not till were old do we see, that through time we couldn't do it with out feet,
               they were there when we took our first step, walked and crept,
they helped us skip,jump,and run, to my feet I owe you this one,
              "Life's been great, fun, romantic, hart wrenching, darkened and sweet,
                       as it comes to and end I can say I did it all on my own two feet." 

man, I wonder what I could write about my hands: )? 

Details | Rhyme | |

What's so Special?

What’s so special about a whole year?
Aside from the birthdays we hold dear.

January represents the start of something new,
so you can forget all the things you have been through.

February designates when lovers can officially share,
just how much that they truly care.

March declares that with green we must adorn,
as St. Patrick would have worn.

April witnesses the falling of showers,
and blooming of pretty flowers.

May praises the one sent to save,
by overcoming death, hell and the grave.

June grants all Fathers a special day,
for the vital role they play.

July remembers the birth of a great nation,
by hosting a fireworks celebration.

August welcomes kids back to the school,
thus remember the golden rule.

September commemorates the soldiers that serve,
our respect they unquestionably deserve. 

October ushers in what we call Halloween,
costume clad kids are sure to be seen. 

November allows Families to gather together,
and give thanks despite the weather.

December summons the world to sing,
in honor of the newborn king.

It will go by quick is what I fear,
so what’s so special about a whole year?

Details | Free verse | |

Time for Equality

Alright you guys, just listen up, it's time for me to vent.
The day has come to recognize, somehow we must repent.
For centuries now, we've acted as, we are much better than,
our counterparts the girls and gals or a.k.a. WOMAN!
They wash our clothes, they cook our food, keep clean things round the house, yet still somehow we all believe that we're the supreme spouse.
Baloney, that's a bunch of crap, it's time to tell them all, 
so get up off you're your BIG fat butt, and turn off that football.
Admit to them, for once for all, as hard as that may seem,
equalitys' found a brand new day, a day they should redeem.
Their dignity, their pride, their trust and all that we've assumed,
that once was our's to have and keep, self-righteously entombed.
They brought our children to this world, and labored major pain,
while we felt slighted .... 'er lack of sex, how dare they do abstain?
They truly are our equals now, so guy's let's all admit, 
they always have been all along, because of gender split.
Just stop and think, what would you do, if all of them weren't here?
Imagine living Man to Man... My God, Good Grief, .... Oh Dear !!!!!!!!

Details | I do not know? | |

Time to relax

Time to relax,
Time to unwind.
So leave me alone
If you don't mind.

I'll roll me one up,
And light it and puff,
I'll smoke it all
Until I've had enough.

Then I'll put it away,
And have a nice day.
It only takes a minute,
Then I'm deep into it.
Now, what was I to do?

Details | I do not know? | |


In the shadow of the darkness, in the time we call the night
lurk the ghosts and evil spirits that cause us all to fright.
  There are those who ride the wind, some crawl upon the ground
  there is no way to hide from them, for they are all around.
They come in through your windows, they slither on your floor
some can enter with the sounds that come in through your door.
  Driven by a hunger, a frenzied need to drain
  some of them may take your soul, while others seek your brain.
They have one thing in common, they know the smell of fear
but you can make them go away if they get to near.
  To those of you who seek escape from the creatures of the night
  take a path you know is good know that you are right.
Tell them all to go away for you are not afraid
they may come up to your door but they will never stay.
  Take the time to think it out, else your life be filled with doubt
  thus you may well fall victim to those i speak about.

Details | Bio | |


So you’re fifteen and have a part time job walking distance from home
How safe is that?
So you’re living fifteen bars down from Queen’s Surf Waikiki
How safe is that?
So you’re another shipyard worker on a half built cruiser
How safe is that?
So you designed lofted built and tested a Boston Whaler
How safe is that?
So you danced around on fifteen story scaffolding that you put up
How safe is that?
A few thousand hours flight time over cold empty ocean
How safe is that?
So you commented on a woman’s poetry

Details | Cowboy | |

Spring Part 2

	Since the spring saw us calving out fifty or more first time heifers it 
was a lot more important to have help from a night herder.  Well I fit that bill.  Billy 
had all the daily work and to give him a nights sleep (except for emergencies) I 
became Dr. # two.  Since I wasn’t very busy, we only had four young ones,  I didn’t 
need to worry about missing any sleep, I could make it up during the daytime 
when I wasn’t busy.  Did I mention our four little ones? During these years I can 
only remember one time I had to wake him for assistance.
	The fall was less hectic because the feeding had not begun.  There 
were years Billy helped the neighbors with harvest chores and it was up to me to 
watch the springers.  I had graduated to taxi driver by then, for our school kids, so 
stepping in during times when Billy was off working for the neighbors wasn’t any 
problem.  This one year I was on duty again.  I had made the rounds about five-
thirty and was busy finishing meal preparations when Billy got home.  I asked if 
he had checked the cows.  He said he had.  I asked  if number thirty-nine had her 
calf yet. “ She’s not ready yet,” was his reply.   “Yes she is,” I insisted.  “No she 
isn’t.  What makes you think she is ready?” he asked.  “You can just tell by 
looking at her,” I came back.  “Number seventy-two is closer than thirty-nine,” he 
stated.  “I don’t know what you are seeing,” he grumbled as he drank his 
tea.  “You can tell just by the look in her eye.  She’s ready to have her calf.  It‘s 
clear to see you never had a baby.”  “Mom I thought you knew by now, you are 
looking at the wrong end,” he said as I set supper on the table and the kids came 
from all directions.  “She looked at me the same way I looked at all the nurses 
and Dr. when I was waiting for ours to be born.  Get this thing out of here!”

Details | Rhyme | |

A Child's Wish

Oh how I wish summer would last forever,
therefore the end of our vacation would be never.

Each and every bright sunny day,
the great outdoors is where we would play.

It need not be humid and hot,
otherwise I tend to sweat a lot.

Forgetting about a thing called school,
as I soak endlessly in our pool. 

Every hour consist of nonstop fun,
plenty of time to ride my bike or just run.

After spending some time at the park,
maybe catch s few fireflies in the dark.
Then host a sleepover every single night,
and all my friends I unquestionably invite.

Watching movies and staying up late,
with snacks to make it great.

Unfortunately school will inevitably start,
thus causing my freedom to depart.

Eventually I must grow up and be a man,
but I’ll be a kid as long as I can.


Details | Free verse | |

Chasing Sleep

Tossing, and turning all through the night,
my body is tired, but my mind can't turn out the light.
Thoughts of the day keep running through,
too much to filter, what can I do?
Counting sheep, I have heard will work,
there is one in the kitchen, I'll call him Burt.
Rattling pans, and watching the news,
he is driving me crazy, what can I do?
New sleep machine, sitting by my bed,
all the noises, rushing through my head.
Each button is different, one sounds like rain,
but when I pushed it, a fire truck came.
New mattress so fluffy, so soft, and dreamy,
my dog really likes it, her name is Winnie.
Gotta go out, and buy some plugs,
maybe I'll try, Tom's yukie ear slugs.
Head is hurting, eyes are red,
I think they're telling me, put us to bed.
I'll try once more, so to the sofa I run,
I look at the clock, it is a quarter till one.
Goodnight all, I hope to sleep,
everything is quiet now, I don't hear a peep.

Details | I do not know? | |


In thanks to all who have supported my contest!  It's been a wonderful time reading your
rhymes and I still, don't know how I will ever pick between them.  All brilliant as the
Poets You Are.  Thank you again my friends! :)

A song of Write.
Fresh as the sage
SO lovely in page
In the RAys of the sun
A Me come from
So FAAa aWay!S ......... you say?
Of the pen on the
Yes! Splendid! And so it shall Be
Come one and all to the!
Hear the call of my friend.and
Join us. :) as we play.

do little dear, a female hear,
Re a little bit of Meee, my o'my!
I'm upside down, FAl so much
how can I seeeee? SOL A lite
it is so bright! upside
in fliiiight, di, ri, fish, is what I
wish, as a dish for my TVeee
siT, be,li,Ve and so te.he

I LAF sofa!, so does he
se es me there! fe et in the air,
RA! I am myself. todaaay.
Play!..... In The Love.

Tune in and Write something. :)

I say, it is the day for writing
rhymes of time in song and
friends enjoy enjoy this
merry little tune. Write about
your bits and bytes flights
and sights from hear to the
Moon as we aim to be a joyous
chorus of hear we sing
in.and for a good deed.

~I call it a smile. Spread it.
Like a great ;pb&j

~Thanks to my love for the wiki~
In music, solfège (pronounced /'so?lf??/, also called solfeggio, sol-fa, or solfa) is a
pedagogical solmization technique for the teaching of sight-singing in which each note of
the score is sung to a special syllable, called a solfège syllable (or "sol-fa syllable").
The seven syllables normally used for this practice in English-speaking countries are: do,
re, mi, fa, sol, la, and ti (with a chromatic scale of ascending di, ri, fi, si, li and
descending te, le, se, me, ra).


Synoptic Optical Long-term Investigations of the Sun is (SOLIS)... just for fun. ;)

Details | Ballad | |


Tick, tock , 
I sit by my clock 

Now and again I look.................. 
My eyes, lifting from my book 

This page read, 
Time passed, 
in a blink of an eye 
It won't last! 
Says I ! 

Tick, tock 
I sit by the clock 

This would run on time 
My world,waiting to chime 

The page turns.......... 
The world turns 
Tick, tock 
I sit by my clock 

Pages read....... 
Minutes passed 
It could be my last 
Hours instead 

Soon ,this book read 
Hours passed............ 
My time instead............. 
This is my last 

A second of your time 
Tick, tock.................. 
My life chime 
Tick, tock 
Internal clock ! 

Seconds,minutes, hours 
weeks, months, years 
Tick ,tock 
My infernal clock! 

Tick, tock 
I sit by my clock 

Details | Free verse | |

euphoria is illegal

! lock !    bloody murder
! me !              for sale / every picture with her face was
! up !                               lost, almost as if she never
     existed. tomorrow's possibilities -- give hint       what will
  crystal ball :                                                                   happen?
                      : explosion. / weary & numb the legs buckle, 
          suddenly acknowledging the science of gravitational pull-
 being so used to boundariless ___________ strolls through
                     & god said let there be
                     light!                                    (anticipated goodness)
you have been mistaken, ; taken what was once pure & let it
     f (ast carried the word of redemption, licked it all up)
   a (nd spit it back out, realizing time as a game that couldn't)
  l (ast. we may try, we may have something good somewhere inside us-)
l (o & behold the constructed anatomy, given everything but what was)
       i need you the most right now! have needed you, will need you
                                  \ until the day i have you /
New breath & New beginnings, let's pretend as if we've never met :
hello.      how are you?                    fab.         
           hi.                       great, you?          -the problem is
                                                               that i know better than
                                                                    to believe you.
 -Euphoria is illegal. Suspicions were aroused earlier today as a
minor was seen carrying a smile. Investigations will proceed shortly.-

Details | Narrative | |

Ron Has A Potion

Ron has a potion, he calls it Magic Salve,
just rub it on, and it burns like, wow.
Now he really says, this stuff works,
rub it on, right where it hurts.
Ron are you kidding, or is this real,
send me a truck load, if it's the real deal.

Details | Rhyme | |

Goldiclocks And The Three Beers

Goldiclocks was a B&E specialist,
Burglary of gold mantel clocks her specialty.
One night Goldie was out 'casing the 'hood",
When a thrilling score she did see...

It was a Little Clock Shop,
A bit dusty and surely quite old,
But what mattered most to Goldie,
Is that it did surely gleam of gold...

So Goldie waited til midnight,
When there was little life in sight
She "jimmied" open the door,
And checked it out by flashlight

A treasure trove of Gold Plated Clocks!
Oh what a sight to see!!
Goldie yawned in spite of her excitment,
She'd been up since yesterday at three...

Just as she was about to load her bag...
With goodies she would soon take...
Her sight fell upon the office refrigerator..
And with her throat dry as Utah's Groom Lake...

She cracked it open, seeking relief
From the thirst of such a great  master thief,
There lay a bunch of beers!!
As much as she might seek!

She popped one 'ope, and guzzled it down,
It tasted so good, oh,yes, please!, another round!!
Before she knew, she had already drank 3 cold, delicious beers,
And, so, on an empty stomach, it greatly dulled her fears..

She loaded her bag, while chugging more...
Until the world started to spin,
And she could no longer find the door..
Poor Master Thief GoldiClocks, then...
Collapsed in a mound of clocks and empty cans,
Passing out with the vision of spinning clock hands

She awoke with cuffs, and head so sore
From stealing naught, but drinking more...
So if you plan on pulling a heist so fine,
Plan on to doing more than just "clock time".

Details | I do not know? | |

An Old Woman

Once upon a time there was an old woman
A really old woman I knew well
She had a daughter who was also an old woman
But the oldest only time could tell.

When they were together, whenever, whenever,
The youngest would always say...
You're sure an old woman, an old old woman
Then the eldest would always say...

Now listen here you, you old old woman,
I've lived a many a year,
I've earned my gray hairs, my battle stripes of life
You're catching up, you old woman, ya hear?

The two old women were as close as sisters,
Just as close as any two could be,
The oldest woman is my mother...
And the youngest one is me!

Details | Narrative | |

Too Much To Do

Take a shower, and wash my hair,
now shave my legs, careful there.
paint my toe nails, and finger nails too,
moisturize everything, still got an hour or two.
brush my teeth, and whiten them too,
while deciding the outfit, I wish I had something
Now do my makeup, and style my hair,
pick out my shoes, which ones do I wear.
Spray on some perfume, now not to much,
keep it simple, barely a touch.
I think I'm ready for my night on the town,
but if you want the truth, I had really, rather
be wearing my favorite nightgown.

Details | Narrative | |

Watchful Eyes

A little bit of rouge, gotta have rose red cheeks,
every now, and then, back to the dresser she sneaks.
Plenty of eye shadow, make those eye lids blue,
giggling, and in secret, she is up to something new.
Almost three, and copying her mom,
this should tell us something about, from whom they learn.

Details | Rhyme | |

The Face of Time

Her hands, they apprehended me
Her face, they tensed and locked
She really had me oh so good
When she went and took my…clock
Yes, clock I said, because of time
She stole it all from me
If I don’t get it back real soon
I may be history
Without knowing what time it is
I can never again be sure
Of time and how to spend it
I may be “nevermore”
Oh my word, please fix my clock
Then bring back all good
And we can watch the hands then spin
Just as we often should

Details | I do not know? | |

Love battle

Love battles

Pascale Ribal

I scrambled for love with all my body.
I fought for love with all my heart.
All the time I wanted to be love.
All the time I needed some one to love me.
Now I am there and here they are ready for my love.
Now I am looking at myself still in doubts of what I can’t tell.
Was I a man before now?
Was it designed for me to tremble before love? 
Well, why is describing my love such a pain?
Well, why is talking about my love such a phobia?
Today is all gone because she is my doctor.
Today I will become that great hero just for you.

Details | Quatrain | |

Dear Sis in Law

Dear sis-in-law, you are never older
You are now getting wiser by the year
I hope the knowledge that you acquire
Let’s you meet things head on, without fear

The sun will always rise for every morrow
As will it set, when day turns into night.
Into your future, with the sunrise, may you walk
Towards the sun, so that your face is always in the light.

When evening comes, the moon will then smile
Rising to allow you light, romantic and serene
Let the moon assist you this year and ever after
And let it grant everything you’ve ever dreamed.

So, Kathy, I have to say now, Happy Birthday!
I’m sorry that this poem’s a little late
Forgive me please, time is of the essence
You’re 41 now, with not much time waste. 

Ha Ha Ha!!!

Details | Free verse | |


it's difficult / yoursatisfaction / set out to succeed based on medical reaction ------
LAUGHTER IS THE CURE!! / the world --- to the god --- is but annoyance / itch /
turning the fur. _______ / your bane = my beauty. just let me remind you precisely
how skepticism is turned into / silence. / electric ---- shock _______ the earth is/
a floating rock. / tell me, mister teacher, ____________ why am i here? the devil
told me just yesterday ____________ that he got sent to haydeez cuz he didn't / 
find / god's little joke of life __________ a laughing matter. but we / nowadays /
we are MAD AS A HATTER we are OFF OUR ROCKER we are / me & you /
infinitely adventuring __ looking for Never. caught in the moment, majesty turns /
as if torn between quarreling roads & lets her weary features become blank ____
baffled. / chance? / deliberation? / she turns to the nation & smiles & throws the 
to the crowd _______ & runs for dear life. / hate ___ embodied ___ we saw it /
masquerading as everyone _______ else ___ / YOU CAN FAIL, YOU CAN 
FAIL ____________ BUT AT LEAST WE CAN SAY / WE / TRIED. the child
cried between particles of (thiswillberegressed) ________ / backwards denial /
_______ they admitted themselves to be the culprits / moments before their
planted bomb _____________________________________________ 

Details | Couplet | |

It's the weekend

it's the weekend and It's all my time
time for me to relax and unwind
unwind from the daily grind
the grind of working 9-5

It's the weekend and  I have 2 days of rest
rest that I will need to look my best
my best for this most fabulous date
a date for which I can hardly wait

it's the weekend and It's another Saturday night
a night to go out and trip the lights
the lights that will be flashing all around
all around the dance floor while I'm getting down 

It's the weekend and It seems to go by too fast
too fast, but I want it to last
to last for more than just 2 days
2 days is not enough time to play

It's the weekend and all i can say
is that I have to go to sleep 
for tomorrow's monday

Details | Senryu | |

The Young Once

   tired, old bones creaking,
    broken body all aching,
     alas, the ‘young once’ !

Details | Ballad | |


Tick, tock , 
I sit by my clock 

Now and again I look.................. 
My eyes, lifting from my book 

This page read, 
Time passed, 
in a blink of an eye 
It won't last! 
Says I ! 

Tick, tock 
I sit by the clock 

This would run on time 
My world,waiting to chime 

The page turns.......... 
The world turns 
Tick, tock 
I sit by my clock 

Pages read....... 
Minutes passed 
It could be my last 
Hours instead 

Soon ,this book read 
Hours passed............ 
My time instead............. 
This is my last 

A second of your time 
Tick, tock.................. 
My life chime 
Tick, tock 
Internal clock ! 

Seconds,minutes, hours 
weeks, months, years 
Tick ,tock 
My infernal clock! 

Tick, tock 
I sit by my clock 

Details | Free verse | |

Time in the Sun

Kayla and Megan were there by the pool,
waiting their turn to jump in.
Matthew and Daniel were splashing about,
acting as if they could swim.
I, standing guard, just watching this show,
was really enjoying this chore.
Any time spent with all of my children
never leaves me wanting more.
It’s just a great day, when I’m part of this;
their father and also a playmate.
Because playing with them on a warm sunny day
is enough to make anyone feel great.

Now, the afternoon sun is getting quite hot,
so on them I must put more lotion.
Getting them out of the pool to apply all that stuff,
they yelled, is the craziest notion.
I told them to stop everything for a minute
just so I can get all this done.
“Hurry up and dry off! Let me do this for you.
Then you can get back to your fun.”
But, what is this chore, being there to protect them,
if I, too, can laugh and have fun?
Well, I’ll tell you this, it really isn’t a bore
to be spending time with them in the sun.

Details | I do not know? | |

Nintendo Wii Part 2

(This is a fictional poem)

Those two japanese guys came to my house and asked to play my Wii.
They chose the wrong time to come visit me.
I kicked both of their _____ and I smashed the windows in their car.
By the time I got through, they had wounds that will leave scars.
After I beat them up, they ran to their car and drove away.
That's the last time they'll go to a person's house and ask to play.

Details | Free verse | |

Forgetful Poe(t)

If you don’t want to speak, 
Why did you call me!?
You’re disturbing me, honey
You know, I’m really busy;
I’ve a poem to finish, about us.

Ok, come to my place, 
If you want;
By the time you be here,
Surely, I’m done with my writings.

Speak, O speak to me now,
I can’t let this poem go…
Fluttering to an unknown grave.

So serious, you are?
As if I’ve done something wrong,
What’s up honey, bad mood?

No, nothing, O my dear Poe(t); 
I just waited for you, for hours.

You’ve forgotten our date!

E. A. Poe, I wanted to be, someday, like him 
a great poet/writer, but...I doubt it, 'cos I am a 
"Forgetful Poe(t)!  

Details | Cowboy | |

Life's Ol' Rodeo

You know you been too long at life’s ol’ rodeo,
When them jeans get too tight and that ol’ paunch does grow—
And then your teeth fall out instead of bein’ knocked
And you pay entry fees with prize buckles you hocked.

That’s when they call you Curly ‘cause you ain’t got hair,
Except in your ears and nose where they’s lot to spare!
Then sittin’ on wood fences is what you avoids,
‘Cause like as not they’ll flare up your ol’ hemoroids!

Buckin’ bulls and broncs is something way in your past,
Rockin’ chairs and Lazy Boys now make your life last.
So now instead of hard tack, you’d rather just pass—
Eatin’ hot, spicy grub just seems to give you gas.

You done been far too long at life’s ol’ rodeo, 
You’d rather watch TV than help a horse to foal—
You ain’t cowboy if you quit chewin’ your toback—
Might as well hock your saddle and all your dern tack.

So if you sit on porches waitin’ for your God—
Better get off your duff before you get the nod!
‘Cause that boss in the sky don’t want no so-and-so,
What ain’t least down there watchin’ life’s ol’ rodeo!

Details | I do not know? | |

Quality Time

That hurts!
Writer's cramp in the brain.
I feel like I haven't a poet's leg to stand on!
Hours ticking away,
Joining forces with the days.
Clock speaks?
"Just thirty minutes has been spent! Thou shalt not give false testimory."
Now I am getting the third degree preaching.
Enough of this.
What's up?
Heavily in the realm of seriousness?
Maturely growing,
I need a rest?
Okay you,
I here you in silence in your little playground,
I know you all to well,
The child in me.
Take the pen,
It's your time to come out and play.

(Thank you Carol Brown on your comments on "It's Time." Your words are so true 
from the heart. I am now laughing because too many wonderful comments from 
all, it seems like there is a writing for everyone of them! I do not know if I should 
keep going or take a break?)

Details | Rhyme | |

unbroken cowboy

  Me and Gene rode the olde wild west
fighting evil was our quest
but I loved Trigger way the best
I always kissed my horse

  Gene could sing and so could I
and so our evenings would go by
staring at the crimson sky
and then I kissed my horse

  we got up with the morning sun
we caught the bad guys on the run
we roped and tied when that was done
I always kissed my horse

  Take me and Dale on the silver screen
we shared many a romantic sceen
but Trigger always stood between
and I always kissed my horse

  Now Trigger stands here 
stuffed and dried
I won't forget the day he died
It was the only time I cried
Last time I kissed my horse.

Details | Senryu | |

I'm Too Old

Comfortable shoes
And forget the panty hose
I am just too old

Details | I do not know? | |


Once upon a time, Lived Sammy the gator
A gator known well for his cooking
He ran the range like everyone else,
But one thing had everyone looking.

Most are not known for their cooking of veggies,
But the exception is this alligator
Sammy knew well, and so very well
Just how to cook a tater.

He’d wash them and skin them, and chop them and dice them,
Til they were just perfect to go in the pan
By the time he got through cooking up them taters
They were the best known to beast or man.

The next time you sit down to the dinner table and see
A big ol’ bowl of fried taters
Remember the one who fried them
And remember Sammy the gator.

Details | I do not know? | |

One in Three

Round & round,
Where they stop,
Only time will tell.
If the clock can keep up?
Me in the 20 yard dash.
Myself at it again!
Never know the speed I'm traveling in.
And their off!
In the head?
Crisscross into the crossfire.
Can they do it all in one day what takes a lifetime?
What's this?
Doesn't look pretty!
More like ugly.
What does my eye see?
And smacked in the middle,
Three in one,
Pile up!
And the game is forfeited by the impossible!
Next time it is better to just let one do the job,
Because cloning only leads to collision trouble.