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Funny Political Poems | Funny Poems About Political

These Funny Political poems are examples of Funny poems about Political. These are the best examples of Funny Political poems written by international PoetrySoup poets

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Details | Lyric | |

Itsy, Bitsy, Teenie, Weenie Brain

To the tune of "Itsy Bitsy, Teenie Weenie, Yellow, Polka-Dot Bikini"
Dedicated to Nancy Pelosi

She has an itsy bitsy
Teenie weenie
Brain inside her little beanie
And she uses it infrequently

An itsy, bitsy
Teenie weenie brain
We get the heebie jeebies
Whenever Nancy's in our company

Two, three, four 
Don’t stick around, head for the door

  Oh, I pushed and I wrested for health care
  But no one wanted this lame, inane fare
  Still I managed to get it through Congress
  The court may now say it was pointless

Two, three, four
Please don’t give us anymore

She has an itsy bitsy
Teenie weenie
Brain inside her little beanie
And she uses it infrequently

An itsy, bitsy
Teenie weenie brain
We get the heebie jeebies
Whenever Nancy's in our company

  Some will tell you that my voice sounds too shrill
  But House members have followed me still
  Yet we have an election upcoming
  From my muse all my members are running

Final Chorus:
From the Congress to her home state
From California to the streets
Of San Francisco you will find her
Oh so sad to lose her seat

Copyright © Carolyn Devonshire

Details | Rhyme | |

Hey, That's My Money

Well, I see that Congress is proposin' another trillion dollar spree!
Those inept buffoons must think money grows upon a tree!
The treasury is crankin' out bales of twenty-dollar bills,
Doin' their part to cure (and inflate) the nation's many ills!

Funds were 'loaned' to help carmakers, now they're hollerin' fer more!
A ton of dough was 'loaned' to banks, but ain't nobody keepin' score!
Millions was designated to help home foreclosures to abate.
Where has my money gone?  I've seen minimal results to date!

Funds are proposed fer more sand fer the beaches of New Joisey,
And city officials want a water park out west in frigid Boise!
Frenzied lobbyists are scurryin' about fer a portion of the pork,
To build an emergency landin' strip on the Hudson in New York!

Money is probably well-spent fer roads, bridges and agin' sewers,
But spare me the cost of subsidizin' sports arenas and sozzled brewers.
Lack of foresight by the banks and politicians got us in this mess,
Now they cover their boondoggles with my money, nonetheless!

Hordes of politicians gleefully gather at the bottomless trough,
Elbowin' others fer largesse they claim will make us better off.
Is there no end to compensatory spendin' and open-ended lendin'?
Hey!  That's my money you fellers are so very inept at spendin'!

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Copyright © Robert L. Hinshaw

Details | Limerick | |

Pocket Pool?

A political pundit with power
stuffed dollars in his purse by the hour.
When called to court,
he said “Why not, sport?”
My daughter’s in real need of a dower.

And, while running a nasty ad game
He cried out “Why I’m not to blame!”
He did it too,
So *crew to you!
And he rose up on a tide of acclaim?

Copyright © Debbie Guzzi

Details | Light Poetry | |

Fruit Loops

You know we’re very poor, of that we have certainly, never denied.
Then the ‘Obama-I-don’t-Care’ gave us another whammy, Yes, indeed! Oh My!
Now, it’s Peanut butter we will have for supper, and even that we’ll spread thin.
And the little birdies we gave a cup of bird seed, occasionally, when we dared…

Well, this morning they got a handfull of Fruit Loops, and they were really stale!
With the sugar they have in galore, now birdies are doing cartwheels at my door.
All that crazy energy, they’re acting just like my kids. Hey! Is that my old phone?
They’re texting wildly! Not watching where they go! Hey! There’s a tree! Oh No!

Some are doing cartwheels… While others are staggering back and forth!
But bird seeds not an option, under Obamas new plan, now! Don’t you know!
We ate it all last week, on our free cheese, from the Food Pantry, Not! A! Joke!
He was supposed to make it affordable, now he put food… WAY out the door!

Hey! We WERE the poor ones! Now we’re worse, as he runs away! By Darn!
OOOPPPS! Maybe Fruit Loops weren’t such a good idea, after all, I surmise!
The Dirty Birdies, are walking upside down, in circles, saying they want more!
If only they had hands! I’d get out my camera, but I hocked it, for the food store!

We had good insurance before the ‘Obama-I-Don’t-Care’! But Now it’s gone…
And our small paycheck was cut in half! So I stopped my cable!… Well, Darn!
Hubby walks miles to work, in the snow, backwards, no shoes, uphill! It’s true!

Excuse me! I have to go! For it’s off to the Food Pantry, with others I am bound!
I’d impeach that silly idiot! But I’d rather, he had to eat, just like us, at our house!
Hey! Maybe that explains his crazy actions… Take his Fruit Loops away, By Gosh!
And when you’re done, make sure he uses the same ‘Obama-I-Don’t-Care’… As us!

Then take away that raise from Congress… to fill the Food Pantries… Yea! I SAY!
When you’re done! Remember to vote Them ALL OUT! For what they have done today!
Then send them Dumpster Diving with me… Because they’ll need to learn the art!
Darn! What Now? Oh Oh! Those little Dirty Birdies… Have learned how to fart!

Copyright © Carol Eastman

Details | Rhyme | |

The Uninvited Guest

2009 and the expenses scandal
Made Gordon Brown, the Prime Minister, lament
So John Bercow, was appointed new ‘Speaker’
To be ‘The Commons’ new broom, was his intent

But he was faced, with an unlikely challenge
In his efforts to clean up ‘the house’
For running loose, in his official residence
Was a small, grey, furry, wily mouse

‘The Speaker’s’ efforts to entrap his visitor
All failed, with equal measure 
So Sally, his wife, used her ‘Twitter’ account
To seek help on catching the creature

“Eeek, we have a mouse!” she did post
“And under the dish washer it’s run,
It’s Sunday, and the ‘mouse-catcher’s’ day off
Can someone tell me – what can be done?”

“My husband’s been ever so manly
But all of his efforts have failed,
Please can someone come up with a plan
To put this small rodent in jail?”

Suggestions came from near and far,
But all of them failed to succeed
The mouse still evaded the Bercow’s grasp
This led Labour MP, Gordon Prentice, to plead

To ‘The Commons’, “Why not have a resident cat
To rid ‘The House’ of the mouse population?”
But the members said, “No – that’s inhumane
We prefer control over eradication 

This ‘House’ has stood for centuries, and,
There’s always been a problem with mice
But to bring in a cat, to kill them all
Well, the voters wouldn’t consider that, nice!

That’s why Parliament employs the ‘mouse-catcher’
To monitor and control the pests
So, until he can catch the Bercow’s mouse,
They’ll just have to live with their uninvited guest!”

Copyright © Janette Fisher

Details | Couplet | |

I Approve This Message

"Vote for me! My opponent is a liar and a thief! I will make a change and rectify all!
I will raise your standard of living, lower your taxes and we'll all have a ball!"

(Please read the disclaimer, 
For this potential hall of famer)

Warning: electing this braggadocio person,
May cause the status quo to worsen.

Any claims made on this campaign tour,
Are not intended as a political  cure.

Electing this person may cause temporary blindness,
Nervous stomach, diarrhea and a lack of kindness.

But people, pay no attention to this disclaimer note.,
Put your blinders on !! Get out there and vote! 

     -paid for by elect a slanderer for office committee:

Copyright © Robert A. Dufresne

Details | Limerick | |

Guiding Star O'er Washington

I pray a  bright star will shine in the air

    O'er Washington to guide some wise men there

        Bringing gifts of commonsense

            And harmony to dispense

                To a nation that is in disrepair

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Copyright © Robert L. Hinshaw

Details | Burlesque | |

A Hummerous Life

In times like this it’s pertinent to stroke the longest cord
for hummer is impertinent and seldom brings discord.
Each slippery politician who runs yelling, “Come on Board!”
is asking for some hummer from constituents lapboards.

He wants them on their knees paying, for taxing fills his hoard
Just a little hummer raises bundles and gets Johnny Boys accord.
And, if you think it just ain’t right to make a joke of Nancy*
then let me tell you baby, your hummers just not fancy!

Hell, you have to laugh at what they say, and their fancy stroking
for if you took them seriously, even Heimlich would be choking!
So, just remember next time your party yells "Come on Board!"
that if you do, you must expect the meaning is untoward.

*Nancy / Nancy boy - It is the opposite of being hard. 
In cold weather a nancy boy would dress up in a coat,
hat, gloves and scarf and a hard guy would wear a t-shirt. 

*hummer a slang word for a type of sex
** humour/hummer it's a play on words

Copyright © Debbie Guzzi

Details | Rhyme | |

Joe The Plumber

Joe The Plumber announced he was runnin' fer Congress the other day!
Congratulations, Joe!  You the man!  Fer you I shout, "Hooray!"
Tell 'em like it is as you did with Obama - show 'em you won't be outdone!
And, Joe, take yer plumbers' kit - you'll need it to repair the damage done!

Include screwdrivers to tighten the screws on higher taxes and spendin',
And yer biggest wrench to shut off the flow of governmental lendin'!
Take yer solderin' arn so as to solidify warm relationships with yer peers,
And a pipe cutter to cut off zany filibusterin' that is tiresome to yer ears!

You'll need a hundred rolls of duct tape to stem the flow of inane babble,
And gallons of Liquid Plummer to unclog the stalemate of that useless rabble!
A good pipe wrench will come in handy to tighten the discipline in that 'joint',
And a twelve-foot stepladder to rise above that rotten mob to make yer point!

Joe, show 'em what real 'change' is meant to be with a new 'shower' of hope!
Flush political correctness down the john that's gotten us on this slippery slope!
Be sure to take yer roto-rooter and clean the sewer that is Washington, DC!
Use yer most powerful hose to flush the whole mucked-up mess out to sea!

Robert L. Hinshaw,CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved

Copyright © Robert L. Hinshaw

Details | Rhyme | |

The Christmas Song -Of Woe-

Overdue bills burning on an open fire
Debt collectors knocking at the door
Yuletide woes being sung by my husband
And I.R.S. sending letters to ignore

Everyone knows a turkey and some mistletoe
Would help to make the season bright
But we'll be eatin' beans,    'cause my pocketbook is clean
Oh!   We're out of Tums.......the house could blow tonight !!!

They say that Santa's on his way
But our petty cash won't jingle much today
So this mother hen is going to sit and cry
Because this hungry gal won't have an egg to fry!

And so, I'm offering this simple phrase....
To folks in Washington D. C. .........
Although the recession....has put us in depression...
Find devices,  to lower prices !!!.......
AND FIX THIS CRISIS!...........Would you pleeeeeeeease???

Just kidding....!!:)  In case the I.R.S. reads this!!

Original song:  "The Christmas Song" ..written by Mel Torme'....1944

Copyright © Carrie Richards

Details | Couplet | |

Living the Dream

My nightmare is so vividly I dream,
The dream, it feels so true to me...reality it seems.

Exhaust and smoke are all I breathe...the air is full of smog...
The job I do is thankless toil, but I work it like a dog.

There's mercury in the fish I eat...there're toxins in my food...
And drugs, they are a constant scourge...myriads for every mood.

Bipolar is my government...a house divided 'tis...
And corporations drive both the pockets of "Big Biz".

The icecaps, they are melting...the sea is rising, too.
Pandas, condors, polar bears -- empty cages at the zoo.

My money ne'er seems quite enough...I'm always out of cash...
My freedom fled when I wed my bride...(live I under the lash).

"Entertainment"? Reality TV...maybe some vampire shows...
Or idjits becoming household names for being beachfront "ho's".

People clamor "climate change" from the seats of S.U.V.'s,
And bitter news on the honey front...what's killing all the bees?

Politicians spending more...we go deeper in the red.
Opinions dressed as "news" journalism dead?

Cell phones are ubiquitous...conversation's endangered now...
And "Kardashians" are famous girls..but who knows why or how?

How strange my twisted psyche is t'make real what must be fake...
Now'f only I could find some way to get myself to wake.

Written on November 27th, 2012
By Daniel Beus (Rebel Sun)

Copyright © Daniel Beus

Details | Rhyme | |

Electile Dysfunction

I voted for Ronald McDonald for Governor
My local politician said that was rude
But if I had a choice of clowns
I wanted one with food
Now our Congressman’s campaign manager was Pinocchio
He thought he was very lucky
But when the campaign manager faced southwest
His nose was in Kentucky.
After watching all the election ads
I’ve been doubled up with gas
So when you’re done kissing babies 
Politicians can kiss my (Darn! Almost said it again)

Copyright © Vince Suzadail Jr.

Details | Limerick | |


Bill (in) Hillary? A turgid question.
Monica eased prostatic congestion.
His Altoids improved the taste,
while her dress absorbed the waste.
Her mother kept the prized possession!

*For the “Political Woes” contest.    You can’t make this stuff up.

Copyright © John Trusty

Details | Burlesque | |

Rice and Beans

I do not want to eat rice and beans any more
I want a new meal
I'm ready to throw this pot out the door
I'm sure I've  had my fill
Rice and beans is my poor folks food
You know when you barely have money
After four days it taste like it's already been chewed
But you smile and eat it like it's sweet honey
I wish I had a grilled burger smothered in cheese with fries on the side
Or a roasted turkey with cornbread stuffing and a side of apple pie
But instead I dread I have rice and beans to keep me fed
through the week
Black beans, red beans, pinto beans I will cook until my house starts to reek!
No more beans! No more rice! 
I need more money to buy something nice
One day I will have my steak and potatoes and my mac and cheese
But until then, no more rice and beans please!

Copyright © Jamila Strong

Details | Clerihew | |

Political Clerihew #1

Barack Obama,
Republican trauma,
Striving to reach across the Aisle
Discovers the effort's an ongoing trial.

Copyright © William Masonis

Details | Limerick | |

Strange Foods

Our Congress has been overlooking

The wisdom of old Granny Lu-Ching

       She was full blooded Chinese

       And said, "Beware strange foods please

 Of crooks that won't eat their own crooking!"

                                    Timothy I. Brumley

Copyright © Timothy Brumley

Details | Monoku | |


One more alien... an extra terrestrial. Bloody foreigners.

Copyright © Dan Keir

Details | Limerick | |

I'll Tell You A Secret

At best, life is just mass confusion
Finding what's real and what's just an illusion
Speak of politics.  Do I dare?
When finding the truth is so rare.
Because politicians are just an optical illusion!

Copyright © Tom Larrow

Details | Clerihew | |

Political Clerihew #2

Nancy Pelosi
Listening closely,
Blanches at Senator shouting "You lie!"
Glares at the outrageous nerve of the guy.

Copyright © William Masonis

Details | Clerihew | |

Double U Mitt Romney


What the Quack!
I dont want my poems in Poem Zoo!


Copyright © Ruben O.

Details | Lyric | |

The pen is mightier than the sword

The pen is mightier than the sword

What is it about some people?
Have they no minds of all
To me their puppets on a string
As they follow all the rules
Whether they make sense at all
That’s all beside the point
They believe all that their leaders say
When it comes to the simple joint!

Our leaders they have called the shots
On this and all that matters
They come to us on the TV set
And I hear their foolish chatter
Our premier with pigeon mind
Was heard to say one day
That cannabis is a killer drug
Or almost any way.

Now I have smoked for forty years
And not once have I ever
Suffered from this gentle weed
These leaders might be clever
Or think they are, through their position
But to me they’re simply fools
But they give me cause to laugh out loud
They’re so damned comical.

23 July 2013 @ 1133hrs.

Copyright © Peter Duggan

Details | Clerihew | |


Mahatma Gandhi
Civil disobedience as modus operandi
The British, oh so superior
Ended up on their right royal posterior!

Diana Dalton
13 Nov 2012

Copyright © Diana Dalton

Details | Limerick | |

A Gallon

“Gas: below three bucks a gallon!”
The media’s gleefully howlin’
-	But let’s not forget
-	They’re screwin’ us yet
If it’s over a buck, they’re a felon!

Copyright © Jack Clark

Details | Haiku | |

Haikus About God: V

Omniscient guy
Yet he lets bad things happen
How can he exist?

Copyright © Dan Keir

Details | Chastushka | |

Political Chastuska #3: No Such Thing As Global Warming

"There's no such thing as 'Global Warming'"
- That "hypothesis" my skeptic friends ignore.
Yet to all those with objections forming,
I suggest you check the price of maple syrup at your store!

Copyright © William Masonis

Details | Light Poetry | |


It’s kinda silly, kinda sad
watching a recently
re-elected politician
trying to kiss
his own ass.

Copyright © Jerry Stevenson

Details | Light Poetry | |

Naked And Unafraid

He was naked and unafraid
even though he is a little man
with a really teenie weenie.
He is a brain dead moron.
He has absolutely no shame.
He will surely be a politician some day;
at least a national Senator
and maybe even Vice President.
He has the vice part down pat already.

Copyright © Jerry Stevenson

Details | Haiku | |

What Does The Rat Say

What does the rat say?
“Vote for me for Senator,
I am a good rat.”

Copyright © Jerry Stevenson

Details | Chastushka | |

Political Chastuska #2: The National Body Has No Head

Try to revive the National pulse -
Next thing you know: "Death Panels"!
Fury, fighting in the town hall aisles;
Best pursue through different channels.

Copyright © William Masonis

Details | Limerick | |

Phillip Buster

Written by Gail DeBole

Phillip Buster could fluster a room -
Full of men whose anger ballooned
     When came his turn to speak,
     Congress snored for a week,
All dreaming he'd peter out soon.

Gail's note: Filibuster - Type of parliamentary procedure.
Right of the individual to extend debate allowing the lone
member to delay or prevent a vote on a proposal. -Wikipedia

Copyright © Gail DeBole