These Brother Funny poems are examples of Funny poems about Brother. These are the best examples of Brother Funny poems written by international PoetrySoup poets
Tempers and attitudes in our house did stay
Guess it was because we were raised that way
Things could get bad when one of us got mad
If you escaped unhurt, then be really glad
For the attitudes would flare
And tempers would rage
We were all quite violent for our age
With our fists our problems were solved
I know that may sound unorthodox to all
But in our home, an evil ruled
In being mean, we were schooled
My brother and sister were taught well
Mess with them and you’ll pay hell
One day while they were playing together
Sitting by the stove because of cold weather
My brother had taken sis’s doll away
With her, this was not how to play
She got mad and started to cry
My brother laughed as he watched her whine
Well then she thought that little brat
If he wants to fight, then I’ll just fight back
So into the ashes from under the stove
She reached in and pulled out a bolt
A bolt from a rail road tie I believe
And trust me when I say they’re big
She turned around and without a word
A big loud crack from his head could be heard
Golden blonde hair now soaked with blood
I had watched from where I stood
This little girl with such cute curls
Has proven that she’ll rock your world
If you mess with her or her dolls
You’d better run at least three miles
For her revenge is not too good
My brother knows and this is understood
For underneath that cute exterior
Is the soul of a very brave warrior
There once was a monkey named Frank
Who loved to walk the plank
He said too many jokes
Pulled too many hoaxe-s
Ha! Ha! Ha! Then he got a good spank
Who's that monkey in front of me
I dare to hang with you on a tree
Oh! What I do? Will you do?
Together we are like glue
Is that my flea or your flea?
~ Skat ~
Bigfoot had a bubbling baby brother—
They labeled him "lively little foot!"
After breakfast I called my little brother June-bug into our bedroom. June-bug got his
nickname when he turned three, when he tried to say Julian properly it came “”June”
and it stuck. I adored my little brother we spent endless hours playing together keeping each other
entertained. Our family consisted of Mom, June-bug and I. My Father had left us long ago,
leaving me as a role model for my little brother.
Grabbing his large bottle of baby powder I puffed it into the air like a volcano,
June-bug giggled as it settled like fine snow on our heads. His eyes grew bright as I puffed
the bottle again and watched it settle on his upturned face.
He laughed some more so I shook the bottle upwards more vigorously.
I spun around letting the powder settle everywhere in the room.
By now June-bug was hysterical with laughter.
His eyes were the only visible part of his covered face and hair.
I launched a spray at Missy, our tortoiseshell cat. She had made herself comfortable at the
edge of my bed. At first she remained still as the powder covered her multi coloured fur.
Then she decided she had had enough and bolted for the door. June-bug turned to watch
her disappear in a flurry of dust. Her small paw prints dotted the once clean carpet.
With the bottle now half full I lifted June-bug onto my bed and let him have the bottle.
He puffed the bottle into his own face causing me to laugh loudly.
He jumped up and down spinning the bottle around, spreading fine white powder all over
the room. We laughed and giggled as our room became our winter wonderland.
Mom came to see what all the noise was about, and we grew silent when we saw the look
on her face. She just sighed and shook her head, closing the door behind her, without a
She re-appeared some time later to give us a bath. We got to camp out in the lounge
room. We were so worn out that we slept quiet soundly.
In the morning, upon our return we noticed the bedroom had been swept clean.
Not a smidge of powder anywhere. It was as if our magical day had never happened.
Even Missy was back to normal.
“Come on June-bug let’s build a fort!” I said taking my little brothers hand and heading for
the lounge room. Leaving him alone for a minute I grabbed one of the big sheets out of the
closet and all the kitchen chairs. When mum finally appeared she smiled at us.
The scolding we had anticipated never came in fact mom never said a word about it and
only smiled as breakfast was served.
Collab. with Mystic Rose =)
A boy asked his dad, “What the elections are for, after all, Dad?”
The dad replied,” I have the money, I’m manager of you all, Lad?”
All money I have, give it to your mom so she is the Government
Maid, a working class, you the people, your brother commitment”
The boy woke up as baby brother soiled diapers that night
Went to his mom’s room and found her alone asleep tight.
So he went to maid’s room, found his Dad in bed with her
The angry boy banged on the door but nobody did bother
The next day he said to his dad that he has been fully fed,
You explain it to me son, in your own words, asked his Dad.
“The management is screwing, the government asleep tight
The people are ignored and the commitment not in sight”.
Secon place winner in
Contest: Election Humor by Carolyn devonshire
Seventh place win in P.d.'s contest June'11
Farm boys, farm boys, go and do your chores
Better take your hat for it’s sunny out-of-doors
Farm boys, farm boys, gotta milk those cows
Milk-em twice a day and feed the hungry sows
Make your mother butter in the butter churn
Argue with your brother when you think it’s not your turn
Measure off the distance you both will have to run
Where it is you’ll need to go to get the milking done
Toe the mark to challenge your brother at the gate
Divvy up the pails to balance out the weight
Farm boys being farm boys down there on the farm
And you’ll milk the cows if I beat you to the barn
Everyone is dressed just right,
with our smiles slapped on tight,
we are having a family dinner.
The mood is tense,
yet we have to make sense,
and we can always talk about the weather.
We blow kisses and show our love,
everything is just right.
We shower praises over each other,
and pray that the night is over without a flight.
Ignore the bitter-in-law,
she needs some sugar.
She vowed to deny herself happiness,
since she lost her lover.
Pay attention to the chatty uncle.
He claims to be rich although he eats like a savage.
just nod your head and seem interested,
and hope the topic does not turn to marriage.
Sit away from the young brother,
once an answer to his question, he is on to another.
To the old man he asks,"So what do you do?"
and to the orphan child,"Where is your mother?"
The room is beautiful, the food is delicious,
a night with our near and dear.
This could well be the perfect family dinner,
but only the flowers in the room seem real.
I think my brother’s a werewolf!
It’s hard to believe but so true!
At dusk he is like a great beast!
He’s hairy and scary; bearded too!
He’s never around in the daytime.
He sneaks out with a creepy girl.
I have a feeling that someday,
she’ll eat his gross flesh... and then hurl!
I see red bumps on his forehead
that count the days ‘till a full moon.
I sure hope he’s not contagious!
Or I’ll be a werewolf quite soon!
Scratching his head doing homework!
Wetting his bed while he’s asleep!
These are just a few of the signs
proving that he’s a monstrous creep!
I went to my mother and told her
about my brother superbly.
Then she giggled and simply said,
“Dear, he’s going through puberty!”
My brother was first at the table
to pile six pancakes on his plate.
I don’t know how he stayed so skinny
given the amount that he ate.
My daddy had made the hot syrup
from white sugar or so he had thought.
After one bite my brother was choking,
hair rising as though he’s besot.
Then Dad yelled ,”Don’t pour the syrup.
Instead of sugar, I grabbed Epsom Salt. "
Won No. 5
He starts singing songs of Ireland and we are home in a jiffy
"What's a jiffy," my mother wonders
"Guess where we went Granny?"
"I don't know but I have a feeling you are gonna tell me," answers my grandmother
"And Don't call me Granny!"
"We went to church so Poppy could ask secret questions."
"The priest gave Poppy a shot and a beer and Poppy sent me next store and he gave me money for taffy."
"He told me not to tell anyone especially you about the priest cause it's only for the priests ears."
"He said God would take away taffy and I'd never get another goodie and God would strike me dead if I told."
"So I can't tell anyone."
"He did," and she starts yelling and grabs a weapon,"what kind of idiot would be scaring a little child?"
Granny is standing on Poppy's toes and and asking him questions of where he'd been and getting a sniff of his breath
"So what did you tell the priest and him giving you consolation and a shot and beer."
"That little rat ," and thinks about the money for candy
Later, Granny is chasing Poppy with that big iron frying pan and poppy running and singing
"In Heaven they have no beer, that's why we drink it here."
"You damn fool I'm gonna bust you in the head, "and throws the pan at his head
Cousin Francis has bill collectors come to the house looking for him
Granny was four foot seven inches and she starts kicking him in the shin
My Mother grabs his Dick Tracy hat and she jumps on it and flattens it
I ask my mom where I was when this happened and she pauses
" You were in Heaven Patrick waiting with your brother!"
The truancy officers bang on the door and want to know where Uncle Charles is
Granny shrugs and says, "He is upstairs and the sound of the window going up sounds
They all run upstairs and see Uncle sliding down the tree and running as fast as his
seven year legs can move
He comes home later that evening holding a goose under his arm
And Poppy has a soft-boiled goose egg for breakfast every morning
I ask Uncle what happened to that goose and He said,"one day he came home and
they had chicken for dinner."
And Poppy was gone to heaven to get me and my brother ready Mom says
And Granny sits my brother and me on her lap and says,"you two knuckleheads listen up."
"This is very important so don't forget it."
"Treat people the way you want to be treated, because you never know who is going to hand you your last glass of water"