Woman's Psalm

Forgive me, Father, for I don't understand what I do. I don't know how or why my mind and spirit gets so caught in this hook , over and over. I yearn for You to refresh me, and refill my inner man. I yearn for truth, for love, for beauty, smiles, laughter, sunlight... a calm blue sea.. a garden of boastful flowers. I yearn for my purpose, my duty, the Divine Direction. I yearn for an angelic lover to lie down and live with me. I ache to have a tiny creature in my arms with those bright and heavenly eyes that stare at me thinking that the world is innocent. I cry to be set free, the spell broken, the demons cast out, the shackles unlocked. I mourn over the golden and pink clouds that have abandoned me. I weep for the Father to pull me out of this snake-infested cradle, for Him to sweetly sing a soft sonnet of consolation that rocks me to sleep, escorts me back home. I desire to write madly with explosion...the way a mad man would play the fiddle. At this moment, I surrender. I bow to Thee. I submit to Thee. Here we are again. Let's put it to bed. Let's watch it scorch in the bonfire. Let's bless it as we bury it. Pour the dirt on down..down...down.... deep down into the dirt. It's going to be a battle. It always is. This is a big one. Nothing too big for Thee, the drum of my heart. " My Sweet girl, come to me. Eat and drink. Suffer no more. You are my dear, forevermore."