The Little Girl

There was once a little girl everyone called an "old soul" This little girl had far too much self control All the time she wanted to beg and cry To be let out of this life, to be buried under blue sky But she never did cry to die Not out loud, but all the time inside Everyone thought she was just quiet and shy They had no idea that she wanted to die Of course you wouldn't think a child of that age Would be tired of life at this tender stage But tired she was, tired of the nights When he would come into her room And turn off the lights She wanted to die yes, each and every time But no one knew and she could not tell She would just peer over ledges And wonder "What if I "fell"? She often wondered how she could "accidentally" leave Because in her life she only ever grieved Grieved for her innocence forever lost She wanted so bad to die at any cost She did not die though, she was not brave enough To take her own life no matter how rough So she just went through the days listlessly wandering Everyday, every year the same questions pondering "Why do I continue to live this life When all it ever had for me is strife? I'll tell you why, because I' a coward Too scared to take my life, too scared to be empowered Too scared to live and be free Too scared to know the deepest parts of me I have to do something I can no longer abide Living everyday just to die inside" The girl made a promise, to herself and no one else That she would put her pain on the shelf She would leave it there and try to forget Everything that happened, all the torment There was a life she wanted to live She decided it would be in her best interest to forgive Not forgive him, that she could not do But forgive herself for everything she went through And try to live the life she always wanted Being happy and vibrant but not haunted Haunted by the ghosts of yesterday's past She hoped she could be happy now, free at last But the girl did not really believe deep inside That from her pain she could actually hide Pain and suffering was all she knew What if this plan for her life also fell through The girl did not know what else to do So she just went on with the days Pretending to forget what she had been through