Separate Me, My Soul From My Body

Another day, another day to cross out on the calendar Are these lens called my eyes functioning I couldn't be the one to say it, my attention is elsewhere; I'm dazed Today is just one of those days Lost in a memory, a memory hidden from another lifetime ago... Could a doctor, please, run a test on my mind so I can find, locate these ailments that replay continuously those proud days so strange so strange, so longo, so long ago ~ how long has it been All I remember is 3 years, just not the exact date or time Seems like as soon as I loved where I was standing reality crushed me brutally though it's only a dead theory I've reshaped, twisted and contorted transformation to restart myself but I'm just a hollow capsule of who I used to be, imaginary I believe only one thing made me whole although I was speaking blindly I still trust the fire is still burning yet it's only a tall tale What do I want, it matters not ~ illusionary but whatever it is, it can stall for one more day There's not a real rush, just a slow day to remember ~ nostalgic I've only seen just one small chance myself ~ rebel society to be different, to stay within my guidelines, cross no lines ~ trapped Sinking with a ship, call me the captain ~ so hello tranquil waters Upon my shoulders, a brief history ~ a serenity filled memory a small chivalrice gesture, an impact all the same love hearing the sound of our colliding names though senses fail now, since the sound never collides anymore still the memory will forever remain ~ peaceful slumber People I know proclaim I'm evermore distant My answer: it's just a reaction ~ there's no denying the truth Letting go is hard enough but can't let it turn into an excuse I do miss though the taste of her lips and the warmth of her skin Loved the beauty in her eyes but felt the disdain of her leaving and I admit my anger wanted me to allow my violent stature to punch a wall but before I hit, I freeze, since I know I will bleed ~ thoughtful The suicidal virus creeps upon me ~ jump off a bridge, make it out alive float lazily down an ocean without danger ~ decompressing Over the years, I've realized that I take the weight the weight of my problems and everybody elses on my shoulders because I believe if I do nothing then the situation's results remain my fault even if it's beyond my resolve I may not be able to save everyone but at least I could rest knowing I did the best I can and it's that single memory that separates me from the elements of the Earth, the people residing in it from gravity, from time, from space separate me, my soul from my body I took an uncomfortable chair to sit upon to draw out my memories constructing this poetic satire of a reminder an outcome was never my fault ~ wrong place, wrong time I'm still fighting myself over it; it'll pass eventually I apologized more than usual just for hopes I'll be forgiven and I know I miss her ~ forever etched, burning I'm just drifting into the eye of this storm to feel the calm amidst this chaos ~ hopefully